Become a Creator today!Start creating today - Share your story with the world!
Start for free
00:00:00
00:00:01
Why I'm Quitting Comedy
100 Plays2 years ago
Do your teeth hurt because you've been trying to chew your way through a brick wall? The road is depleting my energy. Feeling unnoticed when I'm working so hard is taking a toll. Sometimes, we all need a break. Maybe licking the fruit can be just as satisfying as eating it.
Are you subscribed to the pod? If not, what are you waiting for? Subscribe now so you never miss an episode!
Find Alex:
Website: https://www.hoopercomedy.com/
Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/hooperhairpuff/?hl=en
https://twitter.com/hooperhairpuff
https://www.facebook.com/alex.hooper.334/
Recommended
Transcript
Opening with Humor
00:00:01
Speaker
I don't give a fuck about your fucking son.
00:00:03
Speaker
I don't give a fuck about your fucking son.
00:00:05
Speaker
That is a song I came up with yesterday while I was in the shower.
00:00:10
Speaker
And don't worry what it's about.
00:00:12
Speaker
I think you get the gist.
Journey of Sobriety
00:00:14
Speaker
Welcome back to Dirty Briefs, everybody.
00:00:17
Speaker
And...
00:00:19
Speaker
It has been almost five months since I have smoked weed, since I have kissed the rainbow clouds of THC, since I have floated on a magic carpet of dope.
00:00:38
Speaker
I miss it.
00:00:39
Speaker
I really do.
00:00:40
Speaker
But thank you, Snoop Dogg, for joining me in my quest for weed sobriety for the time being.
00:00:47
Speaker
Are you ready for the next episode?
00:00:49
Speaker
Because I am Snoop Dogg and Hoop Doop are coming at you drug free.
00:00:56
Speaker
Ba-bam.
Challenges in Comedy Career
00:00:57
Speaker
Now,
00:00:59
Speaker
In this almost five months, obviously I've had some clarity because my head is not all fogged up with the devil's grass.
00:01:09
Speaker
I've realized I need to take a step back.
00:01:14
Speaker
From comedy.
00:01:15
Speaker
And that doesn't mean I'm quitting comedy.
00:01:17
Speaker
That doesn't even mean I'm stopping comedy.
00:01:20
Speaker
It just means that I need to take a step back from doing the road.
00:01:24
Speaker
Because it takes a lot out of me.
00:01:28
Speaker
I'm constantly getting frustrated from my lack of sales.
00:01:32
Speaker
I'm traveling to these places and having lackluster experiences.
00:01:37
Speaker
And when I have good shows on the road.
00:01:39
Speaker
I'm energized.
00:01:41
Speaker
I am fueled.
00:01:42
Speaker
There is gasoline being poured on my fire.
00:01:45
Speaker
And I just feel like I am absolutely going to burn with the entire world in the most positive way.
00:01:53
Speaker
Well, those experiences have been few and far between lately.
00:01:57
Speaker
And instead, I've just been getting depleted out there.
00:02:01
Speaker
And I'm putting so much into these shows for what tends to be a somewhat minimal return.
00:02:10
Speaker
And that's difficult.
00:02:13
Speaker
It takes a lot out of it because I can't not put my heart into every single performance.
00:02:18
Speaker
So even if there's only 17 people in a giant movie theater, I am performing as if there are 9,000 people in a giant arena.
00:02:28
Speaker
I guess that would be a mid-sized arena, but you get the idea of what I'm saying.
00:02:33
Speaker
I just, I'm sending out all these emails and they're not coming back, which does a number on my self-worth, my self-image.
00:02:41
Speaker
I feel unnoticed.
00:02:42
Speaker
I feel not considered.
00:02:45
Speaker
I've always said comedy, it's, success in comedy is like chewing your way through a brick wall.
00:02:51
Speaker
It hurts.
00:02:52
Speaker
It is a long, slow process.
00:02:55
Speaker
But sometimes you just make a little bit more of a dent or you break through and you begin to see the other side and you have this feeling of just luster that just resonates through you.
00:03:09
Speaker
Well, my teeth hurt.
00:03:13
Speaker
which is making my brain hurt.
00:03:14
Speaker
So instead of chewing my way through the wall, I'm just going to kiss
Realigning Goals
00:03:18
Speaker
it for a while.
00:03:18
Speaker
I'm going to lick the wall.
00:03:20
Speaker
And what do you know?
00:03:21
Speaker
The schnozberries taste like schnozberries.
00:03:26
Speaker
I need to step back.
00:03:28
Speaker
I need to relinquish control and focus on other things.
00:03:34
Speaker
And my wife is the one who told me that she goes, I think you just need a little bit of a break.
00:03:40
Speaker
And I,
00:03:41
Speaker
I realized she's right.
00:03:45
Speaker
I don't know how to do that.
00:03:48
Speaker
I don't actually comprehend how to turn my brain off from constantly thinking about how to be more productive, how to put myself out there, how to keep beating down the door of success.
00:04:04
Speaker
But that's what it is.
00:04:06
Speaker
It's not quitting.
00:04:09
Speaker
it's realigning.
00:04:11
Speaker
I have to maintain my desire for my goals and for what I want to achieve, but I can't force success.
00:04:19
Speaker
I need to, I need to attract and not chase.
00:04:23
Speaker
And that way when
Embracing New Opportunities
00:04:24
Speaker
things do happen, it won't feel so desperate.
00:04:28
Speaker
I won't be like, thank God I got this club to get back to me so I can actually pay my bills this month.
00:04:36
Speaker
I am not going to have to go work a job in construction.
00:04:42
Speaker
That's never going to be an option for me.
00:04:43
Speaker
I'm not good with my hands at all.
00:04:46
Speaker
They're little girl hands.
00:04:48
Speaker
You can see them.
00:04:48
Speaker
They're not strong, but that's what I need to do.
00:04:53
Speaker
Stepping back is about letting go to make room for something else.
00:04:58
Speaker
And sure enough,
00:05:01
Speaker
When I made this decision a couple of weeks ago, I immediately got hit up by my manager to get a new commercial agent because somebody had asked about me and I realized, well, okay, there's an opportunity in that.
00:05:16
Speaker
I've had my same agent for 15 years.
00:05:17
Speaker
They've been great, but I haven't been auditioning at all because I think I'm an afterthought.
00:05:22
Speaker
Sure.
00:05:23
Speaker
Somebody else wants to come after me.
00:05:24
Speaker
Great.
00:05:25
Speaker
Wow.
00:05:26
Speaker
I feel seen.
00:05:28
Speaker
I'm doing a new volunteer opportunity so I can focus not so much on myself, but look toward other people as well.
00:05:36
Speaker
And that's where all of this is starting to come together is I'm still doing shows.
00:05:43
Speaker
I have projects in the works.
00:05:46
Speaker
I'm just not spending every day ripping my hair off, tearing apart my skin, trying to figure out what should I be doing?
00:05:56
Speaker
Sometimes nothing.
00:05:58
Speaker
Sometimes I can just sit and read a book.
00:06:03
Speaker
I just read I'm Glad My Mom Died in two days because I had the time and it was such a good book.
00:06:08
Speaker
Jeanette McCurdy, if you haven't read it, really good stuff.
00:06:11
Speaker
And that was enjoyable.
00:06:14
Speaker
I'm doing some online work that's bringing in some money just so I can at least feel that satisfaction of doing it.
00:06:20
Speaker
And again, this isn't quitting anything.
00:06:25
Speaker
This is just me taking my head out of the engine and just giving myself room to breathe.
00:06:35
Speaker
I need to take gratitude in what I've already accomplished.
00:06:38
Speaker
Be grateful for all the wonderful things in my life.
00:06:41
Speaker
Be proud of myself.
00:06:42
Speaker
I need to exercise patience.
00:06:45
Speaker
And then I can sit back and watch the opportunities roll
Reflecting on Comedy Career
00:06:50
Speaker
in.
00:06:50
Speaker
Not every single audition is going to feel like, God, if I don't get this one, then what the fuck am I doing?
00:06:56
Speaker
Because sometimes that happens.
00:06:59
Speaker
I've been doing comedy for almost 15 years.
00:07:03
Speaker
That's a long time.
00:07:06
Speaker
A long time.
00:07:08
Speaker
And when I started, sometimes I think I should be further along, but when I started, I didn't have a goal in all this.
00:07:15
Speaker
All I wanted to do was walk on stage and be a silly fuck and make people laugh.
00:07:22
Speaker
Well, goal accomplished.
00:07:23
Speaker
I do that every time I hit the stage.
00:07:26
Speaker
And I'm becoming something that I never intended to become.
00:07:30
Speaker
I used to just be this party animal that would just throw caution to the wind and do whatever I wanted and stay up all night, work the next day, come up with new jokes, get back on stage.
00:07:41
Speaker
But I didn't have any clear goals.
00:07:44
Speaker
I was just having fun.
00:07:46
Speaker
And now, if I really want to make this...
00:07:49
Speaker
a sustainable lifestyle, I need to realign and put things together in a way that is going to continually build to different levels of success, to bring more people in to my life, towards me, to be a magnet.
00:08:11
Speaker
That's what I need to be.
00:08:14
Speaker
And I think it's going to happen.
00:08:16
Speaker
I know it's going to happen.
00:08:18
Speaker
But trying to just say, hey, I don't need to send 20 emails to comedy clubs today, not get anything back, and start feeling like a stupid piece of shit, which happens.
00:08:30
Speaker
And I hate to call myself such a negative name, but that's what happens.
00:08:36
Speaker
My own self-worth starts to dwindle away when things don't happen that I feel I deserve.
00:08:43
Speaker
So instead...
00:08:45
Speaker
Let's slow down a little bit.
00:08:47
Speaker
Let's really think about what we want moving forward and specific ways we are going to achieve it.
00:08:57
Speaker
And I'm sure this applies directly to your life in some way.
00:09:03
Speaker
You might not be an artist, a comedian, an entertainer.
00:09:08
Speaker
But there's probably something that you're holding on to, a piece of your identity that if you let go of, who knows what will open up inside of your heart, inside of your mind, inside of your pelvis, if that's where you're trying to open something up.
00:09:25
Speaker
It's so easy to get frustrated by everything.
00:09:28
Speaker
The world tries to do that to us.
00:09:31
Speaker
Constant beratement from news and social media.
00:09:35
Speaker
There's just so much negativity everywhere.
00:09:38
Speaker
And to stay positive all the time, that is work.
00:09:43
Speaker
You know how much work that is.
00:09:47
Speaker
And sometimes I just, I feel a depressive wave coming on.
00:09:50
Speaker
So you know what I do?
00:09:51
Speaker
I feel it.
00:09:53
Speaker
I don't try to ignore it and try to say I'm better than this because I'm not.
00:09:57
Speaker
Things are going to get to me, especially with all of the recovery that I've had to do these past year and a half.
00:10:06
Speaker
Everything that I've had to face head on and stare in the face, it took a lot out of me.
00:10:13
Speaker
And I need to give myself the grace to say, hey, you're doing a really good job, even if you don't have everything.
00:10:23
Speaker
You can't compare yourself to other people.
00:10:25
Speaker
Comparison is the thief of joy.
00:10:28
Speaker
Compare and despair.
00:10:32
Speaker
Jealousy gets you nowhere.
00:10:35
Speaker
Gets you nowhere.
00:10:37
Speaker
So do what makes you happy.
00:10:39
Speaker
What are you going to do today?
00:10:41
Speaker
that is going to bring you joy because it is a choice.
00:10:46
Speaker
It is.
00:10:47
Speaker
You can focus your joy inwardly and no one can take that away from you.
Choosing New Paths
00:10:52
Speaker
You can sit and take a deep breath and you can smile as big as you want, which you deserve.
00:11:02
Speaker
You truly do deserve that for yourself.
00:11:07
Speaker
I'm not going anywhere.
00:11:09
Speaker
I'm just going to stop forcing what hasn't been working.
00:11:15
Speaker
When you continually try to beat down a door and it's not opening, step back from the house and realize that window is cracked open.
00:11:27
Speaker
And I bet I can squeeze my way through that, even if it might not be as comfortable as the door.
00:11:33
Speaker
But my hands hurt from knocking on this thing so ferociously.
00:11:41
Speaker
So I'm going to try to find a way to crawl through a window.
00:11:43
Speaker
And when I do that, something tells me that front door is going to magically open.
00:11:51
Speaker
Clarity.
00:11:53
Speaker
I really miss
Embracing Sobriety
00:11:54
Speaker
weed sometimes.
00:11:54
Speaker
There are times, God, I'm just around it and I just want to smoke it.
00:11:58
Speaker
Like when I'm at a concert or when I'm just like at Donna set and everyone puffs up a joint, I'm like, Oh, I want to do that too.
00:12:05
Speaker
But instead I'm just living in my feelings.
00:12:08
Speaker
Woo.
00:12:10
Speaker
You ever do that?
00:12:11
Speaker
You ever just macro dose reality?
00:12:13
Speaker
Woo.
00:12:15
Speaker
It's his own drug.
00:12:16
Speaker
It is its own drug.
00:12:19
Speaker
And Snoop Dogg is about to learn that too.
00:12:22
Speaker
I don't know how far he is into his journey, but man, breaking that habit, it's tough.
00:12:30
Speaker
But habits aren't good.
00:12:32
Speaker
Change is healthy.
00:12:35
Speaker
So let's focus on that.
00:12:38
Speaker
And please remember, I'm taping a special January 12th in Bridgeport, Connecticut, and I would love to see you there.
00:12:45
Speaker
Or if you live in Los Angeles, January 7th, I am running that hour at the Hollywood Improv.
00:12:51
Speaker
Tickets are available now.
00:12:53
Speaker
Or...
00:12:54
Speaker
January 10th at McGoobie's in Baltimore.
00:12:58
Speaker
I will also be running it.
00:12:59
Speaker
And that's my last run through before the actual taping.
00:13:01
Speaker
So come to one of those shows when I am showcasing this hour of everything that I have built in the past year and a half, because I am stoked
Looking Forward to New Shows
00:13:12
Speaker
on that.
00:13:12
Speaker
And I need to remain stoked on that.
00:13:15
Speaker
That way, when I finally get to that taping, I will absolutely kill it in a high stakes performance.
00:13:23
Speaker
Thanks for being here, everybody.
00:13:25
Speaker
I love you so much.
00:13:26
Speaker
Have a beautiful day.
00:13:28
Speaker
And remember to take a deep breath, smile, and focus your joy.