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Awesome Dad Spotlight w/ Ricky Varandas (Part 1 of 2)
192 Plays2 years ago
This is part 1 of 2 of our conversation with Ricky Varandas, host of The Ripple Effect Podcast.
Ricky is an exemplary parent and a wealth of knowledge, which is why I am glad to share this wide-ranging conversation with you.
For part 2, which is for adults only, you can sign up for free to my membership platform. Takes less than a minute: https://members.christianyordanov.com/
Connect with Ricky:
Website: https://rickyvarandas.com/
The Ripple Effect Podcast: https://rickyvarandas.com/category/the-ripple-effect-podcast/
Rokfin: https://rokfin.com/RippleEffect
All his other channel links: https://rickyvarandas.com/channels/
Christian's links:
Children's health consulting (autism, ADHD, gut dysfunction, etc.): https://christianyordanov.com/childrens-health-consulting/
Get my book Autism Wellbeing Plan: How to Get Your Child Healthy: https://www.amazon.com/Autism-Wellbeing-Plan-Child-Healthy/dp/1916393004
Get 3 FREE video courses instantly when you sign up to my members' community here: https://members.christianyordanov.com/
The courses are:
- The Healthy Gluten-Free, Casein-Free Diet for Autism, ADHD, and Gut Dysfunction
- Nutrient Supplements for Autism, ADHD, and Children's Health
- Health Challenges Autistic Children Experience
These courses cover topics such as gut dysfunction and infections, clostridia bacteria, Candida, oxalates, methylation, excitotoxicity, zinc / copper imbalance, going gluten-free and how to do it well, heavy metals and chemical toxicity, probiotic supplementation, mitochondrial dysfunction, immune system dysregulation, neuroinflammation, and much much more. I even show you how to select high-quality supplements and avoid the junk and hype - with real examples and analysis of ingredients on screen...
Every parent of an autistic child must know this information that is why I want to share it with you for free. And parents with kids that have an any health complaint will also learn a ton. In fact, every parent will learn a lot of value information from each of these courses - so please help me share this information with more parents! Thank you so much.
Get the courses: https://members.christianyordanov.com/
Website: http://christianyordanov.com/
Recommended
Transcript
Introduction and Episode Overview
00:00:00
Speaker
Welcome to the Children's Health Podcast. I'm your host, Christian Jardinoff. Today, I have an amazing guest for you, Ricky Verandis. He's host of the Ripple Effect Podcast, which is one of my favorite podcasts. He covers such an eclectic array of topics on his podcast. It's one of the best, most informative podcasts you will find. And
00:00:21
Speaker
More than that, Ricky is an amazing dad and just listening to him, it's very inspiring.
Fatherhood and Parenting Insights
00:00:29
Speaker
This is an exemplary parent. This is how I see Ricky. I invited him on the podcast to share some of his insights, his ideas into fatherhood, parenthood, and what it actually means to be a good parent. We cover a ton of topics.
00:00:50
Speaker
I'm sharing with you today the first 45 minutes or so of our interview with Ricky. The full episode is an hour longer than that, so it's about an hour and 45 minutes that we talk about a number of things. The second part is, let's just say it's PG-13, okay?
00:01:10
Speaker
So what I'm going to do is I will share part one with you today and I will either have clips of part two or I will publish part two at a later time. But what you can do if you want to listen to the whole interview immediately, all you have to do is sign up to my free members area. The link is down below. If you go to my website, you'll see a link to sign up. Sign up takes less than a minute. It's free. You just need basically an email and a name.
00:01:40
Speaker
And when you sign up, I have three free video courses that I share. So there's one on how to do the gluten free case in free diet. Well, there's one on choosing high quality supplements for your child. And I have a course on the health challenges that autistic children experience. So there's three free video courses. There will be a ton of
00:02:00
Speaker
really cool free content with the free membership on the website, but the reason I have that is I want certain things for public consumption and I want some of the more in-depth topics to be behind this, inside this membership community. I have my reasons for that.
00:02:19
Speaker
You will understand as we go along with the podcast, if you continue tuning in, you will understand why some of these things that we do. So really awesome interview. Ricky is such a knowledgeable guy. He is so articulate and well versed in such a wide range of topics that it's an absolute joy to listen to him talk.
00:02:42
Speaker
And you can bet that we're going to be having Ricky on again in the future. If you do like what he talks about, if you are coming in from my podcast Connecting Minds, if you like a diverse range of topics,
00:02:57
Speaker
make sure you check out his podcast, the repo effect podcast, where he covers, like, I think it will be easier to list things he doesn't cover than the topics he does cover, like amazing guests, some of the best guests you will find, right. So without further ado, Ricky Verandas, guys, again, thank you for tuning in, please share this with other parents. And I'm really excited to share this episode with you, Rifin.
Balancing Relationships and Well-being
00:03:26
Speaker
Yeah, well, what the hell were we just talking about? Yeah, yeah. Well, it's it's important. Well, I tell some of my friends that have kids because we all kind of go through similar situations where
00:03:39
Speaker
You end up falling in love with this person and they fall in love with you and taking that love to the next step. The natural, organic next step is having kids. So you end up having kids and it's because you love this person so much that you want to have that commitment with each other. You want to take that life journey together. And then you have kids and all your love and attention goes towards the kids. And then you end up investing very little to no time in that person that
00:04:09
Speaker
led you to having these beautiful kids that now you cherish and love. And I say it all the time, a relationship is a plant that needs watering. And if you don't water, it's gonna die. But typically what people do is, especially once you have children, and again, there's nothing wrong with investing as much as your time and energy and all those things into your children. I mean, you love them more than anything in the world. So naturally you're gonna,
00:04:38
Speaker
Just give them all your attention and you and you want to nurture them and you want to be there for them but what happens is that your other relationships like with your significant other gets neglected a little bit and A lot of times people put that plant on the side and they stop watering it and they think it's gonna stay alive You know and then you stop watering you stop and eventually one day you're like this plants dead and it's because I neglected it for other plants these baby plants that I love so much and I
00:05:05
Speaker
so you know in regards to having children that that's one of the things that can be a little difficult it's like okay how to how do you
00:05:14
Speaker
Do your best to balance it all out. You know, and that's the thing, like a lot of times I say I'm busy or whatever. A lot of the things that keep me busy isn't just things that I have to do in regards to like, OK, chores or priorities, but it's things I want to do. And and I consider priorities because they are going to help with my relationship in my marriage, with my kids, with all these things.
00:05:41
Speaker
you know, like going to the gym, right? Like I go to the gym at least typically it's four times a week, sometimes five times a week, a minimum three times a week. I play sports at least once, at least once a week. I will go play basketball or soccer for two hours. But on a good week, what I consider a good week, I usually play three times a week. I usually play
00:06:06
Speaker
Tuesdays, Wednesdays, and then I play Sunday nights. And that's when I'm at my best. I'm doing the things that make me happy. I'm doing the things that keep me at peace. I'm also typically doing podcasts, putting out an episode a week when I can.
00:06:23
Speaker
Like that gives me some sense of fulfillment. Like I'm doing something important. And all these things are required for me to be the best person I can be. Because if I'm in a good mental and physical and emotional place, I can be a better husband. I can be a better father. I can be, you know, like sometimes I joke my wife because she's never been one to exercise and it's not her thing. But she's been pretty genetically gifted where she comes from a family of very skinny people. So she doesn't gain weight too easily.
00:06:53
Speaker
But I always tell them, it's not about exercising to stay fit or cosmetically look your best. It's more about the emotional and mental relief that it gives me. I get a lot of that frustration or anger or whatever out at the gym that built up energy. And also, I don't bring my phone to the gym. So between sets, I don't have any distractions. I just sit there and I'm one of my thoughts.
00:07:23
Speaker
You know, the reason why some of your best ideas come on downtime, right? When you're just kind of wandering mentally and or when you're in the shower or going for a walk or whatever, like I try to use that gym time to try to just be there, like be present and be not distracted by my phone or emails or whatever. And whatever comes to mind between sets, that's what I ponder on. And it gives me that time to ponder and wonder.
00:07:49
Speaker
or think about my actions. Think about like, okay, hey, did I lose my cool with my kids? Should I, could I have done better of like, you know, not yelling so quickly or was there a better method of going about it or something that the wife and I are butting heads about maybe
00:08:05
Speaker
try to see it from her perspective and maybe I'm seeing it incorrectly. You need these things. So to me, I stay busy, but all these things are required for me to function at my best. And even as parents, I think a lot of times you start eating like crap, right? You start eating while you're feeding your kids snacks or whatnot. And you get more concerned about feeding them good food than yourself. And you start worrying about their health and all this stuff and your relationship with your kids. And like I said, everything else gets neglected.
00:08:34
Speaker
It's a balancing act. It takes effort and it takes work to to be at peace and find happiness and all but once you do it becomes a way of life and and you'll be in a much better place that I You know my there's that saying like
00:08:51
Speaker
a woman or a man meets a woman hoping she never changes and a woman meets a man hoping she can change them, you know, and it's there's some truth to that, right? Like I have buddies that I grew up playing sports with or doing, you know, stuff with that. They're like, oh, my wife gets mad. I can't, you know, I don't have the time to do this anymore or whatever. And I'm like,
00:09:11
Speaker
but it makes you a better you right like my wife there's there's been times in the past where she's like oh why don't you skip basketball why don't you skip soccer why do you have to go to the gym so you know and i'm just like listen i'm like the reason why i have such a large fuse and the reason why i can deal with like a lot of stress uh in regards to like the kids driving us nuts or whatever
00:09:32
Speaker
Or if we get in a conflict, you know, I can stay calm and not get emotional is because of these other things I do. This is what keeps me where I am. And to me, they're not even, you know, hobbies or extra activities. They're just a way of life that they're what keeps me flat line, you know, and I'm sure you're the same way.
00:09:53
Speaker
Yeah, I definitely am more effective husband-parent when I get to do the things I want to do. So for me, I love to wake up 4 or 5 a.m. in the morning and spend a bit of time, get some red light therapy going, maybe do some stretching, do some cupping therapy, whatever I'm into at the moment. At the moment, I'm reading a book on iridology, so the stuff with the eyes. And I just want to be able to read something
00:10:23
Speaker
maybe esoteric and then something related to health and then maybe if i can go for an hour out here in the sun especially now when the weather is really awesome with my dog and we can go for a nice long walk for an hour ideally or at least half an hour and i usually go an hour before my my kid wakes up so.
00:10:43
Speaker
The sun is still not too hot. You know, there's a nice little hill as an incline. You can, you know, walk up and sometimes I jog up. Sometimes I sprint up depending on, you know, how I'm feeling that day. And it's amazing. I come home, quick shower, and now I'm, you know, I'm ready to be a dad and ready to do stuff. So definitely you have to, it's like my sister-in-law.
00:11:08
Speaker
She talks about this thing about filling your cup. You have to fill your cup before you can fill other people's cup. And you're exactly right. I knew this was going to be a super awesome episode.
Promoting Healthy Eating in Children
00:11:21
Speaker
In fact, just to let you know, bro, this is actually the inaugural episode that we are recording. So this is the first interview. I will be putting a bunch of old interviews from my other podcast, a bunch of like solo episodes before I publish this. But I knew this would be epic because from my previous conversations with you,
00:11:39
Speaker
just how what a real man you are, as you know, when it comes to you know, like your, your kids and like protecting them and you know, bodily sovereignty and autonomy and all this stuff. I saw this in you, from my conversations with you and from listening on your podcast. So these are the kind of strong parent figures I want to have on here and help to inspire other parents, you know, to, you know, to
00:12:08
Speaker
connect with that energy, right? So let's talk, let's talk diet, bro. Tell me
00:12:15
Speaker
How do you keep your kids from succumbing to the just poison that is out there at every corner, every turn available to our kids? What's your strategies? And I'm sure it gets a little bit more challenging as your kids grow older. So I'd love to hear your insights because my kid is like under two still. So it's very easy still, but I'm sure that it will become much more challenging.
00:12:43
Speaker
Well, it gets expensive to find healthy snacks that are something that they also like. Like, for example, my son loves cereal, right? So there's this brand called Magic Spoon and it's has its high protein. And, you know, I don't know if it's low. It's been a long time since I looked at it to nutritional facts on it. But I don't know if it's low sugar or no sugar, but
00:13:07
Speaker
It's a better alternative than regular cereal. So I didn't know which one he would like. So I bought every flavor and this giant box comes in and my wife's like, what are you doing? I'm like, you cannot put a price on health. I'm like, I will try every flavor and in some way convert him to this brand because it's a better alternative.
00:13:26
Speaker
Same thing with bars and cookies. My kids live off a lot of Quest stuff, like Quest bars, Quest cookies, and I'll try every, same thing. And if I see something organic, something healthy, it can get, it does get expensive. Sometimes I'll have friends of mine, they're like, oh, aren't those expensive? I'm like, yeah, but I'm like, you just bought a Louis Vuitton purse, or you just leased a brand new car. You can't put a price on your health. I'm sure, I've just said this before to you, or you've heard me say it on my podcast,
00:13:55
Speaker
Your body is like a car that you can't trade in. Like you have to put the best stuff in it or it's going to break down. And, you know, once it does start breaking down, you're stuck in that crappy car that is limping around and having issues, you know, and that's it. Like so you have to look at your body as like, OK, this is a car that I cannot I cannot trade in.
00:14:18
Speaker
So how would I handle it? I would change the oil every 3000 miles or whatever it may be. I would change all the fluids. I get the tune ups. I would constantly get a check by the best people. I would put in the best.
00:14:30
Speaker
oils, the best fluids, the best gas, make sure that I put all the best stuff in it so it lasts me as long as it can. That's not the way we look at our bodies. Many people, they look at our bodies as like it's almost like a car that you can trade in. It's the last place you should cheap out. And instead, in most cases, it's the first place people cheap out. They'd rather go buy a new pair of Air Force Ones than buy grass-fed
00:14:58
Speaker
meat or, you know, organic, anything, you know, and then you hear the term or you hear people say, oh, well, organic is just nonsense. And it's, you know, who cares? It's like, maybe I'm like, but it definitely is probably better. Like I'd rather take the take the chance eating the thing that is attempting to be healthier for me than the one that's like, I'm not even going to post organic on here, you know, eat it at your own risk. Like to me, it's like at least they're trying.
00:15:25
Speaker
And it might be a marketing thing. I know there's a great documentary that came out some years ago about the getting organically certified and all the, you know, all the holes in that and, and also like some of the
00:15:40
Speaker
I don't know if I can swear, but I'll try not to. The fuckery of when they say things like, oh, it's a free range chicken, right? Like they were, for example, in the documentary, they talked about how the door just has to be open so they can leave if they want.
00:15:59
Speaker
But it doesn't mean they actually do leave, like, and then they'll consider it free, like all these little things. And of course, every in regards to food's a big business and you have to read the nutritional facts. You have to do your part in in not just seeing the front of the package, but seeing the back of the package, because there's a lot of things that you buy for kids to say natural or say, you know, naturally flavored. And then in small print, it says an artificially flavored or whatever.
00:16:25
Speaker
or they'll say keto or they'll say whatever term they can to get you to buy it. But really the one place they can't really lie to you is the nutritional facts. And one of the most important things when you become a parent is really understanding how to read nutritional facts and look at ingredients. Because something will say sugar free, but then it'll say sucralose. And there's many other terms, as you know, for sucralose. So they'll find other
00:16:52
Speaker
linguistic, very skillful ways of using the same ingredients.
00:16:57
Speaker
Crappy ingredients, but but yet not letting you know by hiding it in something else So it's like it gets very complicating a little bit But it's pretty simple like I always say try to eat things you can pick things you can grow things you can kill like yeah, I had I remember Andrea Lowell who was actually a she used to host a Playboy radio in the morning the radio show and then she became big in fitness and and all this stuff and and had a really awesome Instagram page very a
00:17:24
Speaker
Big following and i remember she she she's the first one who i heard say that she's like if it has ingredients i don't buy it, and i'm like that's a really good point i'm like why should we be buying things that have, ingredients right like you should be buying the ingredients not you know things you want to put in your body you know and,
00:17:42
Speaker
So with kids, yeah, it definitely does get difficult, obviously, when they go to birthday parties or they're around friends or, you know, sometimes you let them kind of cheat or whatnot and you let them be kids. You don't deprive them. But you definitely want to do your best at trying to find healthy things they like and constantly
00:18:03
Speaker
challenge their palate you know because kids will adapt to eating the same thing over and over again and adults will get bored of you eat the same things over and over but kids won't if like if all they like is chicken then that's all they're gonna eat is chicken I talk to parents all the time they're like all my kid will you is this and I'm like really you know they don't get bored so I'm constantly introducing stuff and then constantly reintroducing it like sometimes they say they don't like something and and I'll try to motivate them by like hey
00:18:27
Speaker
I'll give you a dollar if you try this or I'll let you have a freeze pop after if you try this and just try to find ways to kind of convince them to give it a try. And really just because I'm like I want them to have good eating habits because it's not uncommon that if you see fat parents, you see fat kids because they're creatures of their environment.
00:18:51
Speaker
They don't, they're not born knowing how to eat. It's not a coincidence that if the parents are unhealthy, a lot of times the kids are unhealthy. And that's why it's funny because I've had this conversation with my wife and it's just a theory. It's not really backed up by any, any study or anything like that. But like I was saying, like if you see fat kids, you see fat
Genetics vs. Lifestyle in Health
00:19:13
Speaker
parents. So you could either look at that obesity as from a doctor's perspective and say, oh, it's hereditary.
00:19:21
Speaker
It's in their DNA. Or you can look at it as, no, it's their environment. It's the way they eat. It's their lifestyle. They've adapted the way their parents live and eat. And now that's why they have the same health issues. It's not because of, you know, it's in their DNA and it was genetically given to them. It's because they're just adapting
00:19:42
Speaker
you know, to the same lifestyles as their parents. So I think a lot of times that happens more than we probably admit or notice. Like we think like, oh, you know, I had lung cancer. So, you know, my grandfather had lung cancer, you know, and it's like, OK, well, what do you guys all have in common? Because if you all live in the same environment, the same culture, have similar eating and living habits, that could be what's causing, you know, what we think is, oh, it's just genetic, you know. So
00:20:10
Speaker
To me, I think we need to kind of stop putting the blame on genetics and maybe take some more responsibility for the way we live and the way we eat and say like, okay, maybe I do have some control over this because I think once you think it's genetic, like, oh, my grandfather died of a heart attack, my father died of a heart attack, I'm probably going to die of a heart attack. It's like, okay, you can look at it that way or you can say, no, I'm going to be proactive and I'm going to try to
00:20:38
Speaker
be as healthy as I can and whatever caused those issues with my grandparents, maybe they can be reversed or maybe they can be avoided in some way because I'm living a healthier lifestyle.
00:20:54
Speaker
Yeah, I think I answered your question somewhere in there. Yeah. No, it's interesting. I just yesterday I got certified with a company called DNA Life as a grow baby practitioner. And basically, it's a genetic test you do at home. It's a blood spot. And there's a number of genes that we analyze and we look at all those genes or have some scientific literature that backs up
00:21:22
Speaker
that has clinical utility basically.
00:21:26
Speaker
There's a number of genes that are associated with various things like smoke for gestational age, gestational diabetes, preterm birth, miscarriage, and stuff like that. And it's interesting that it's like two, three dozen genes which we can modify with lifestyle, diet, and supplementation. But when you look at how big the genome is, we're talking 20, what, 22, 23,000 genes.
00:21:54
Speaker
We find a few genes and now we're like, okay, this is the holy grail. That is the holy, you know, MTHFR is the holy grail. And even if like, I have a ton of research downloaded. Now I'm going to read. There's another certification that has to do with the genes that predispose people for obesity. And most certainly, you know, how some people are more predisposed to cardiovascular risk or cancer and most certainly some genetic predisposition
00:22:22
Speaker
is there for folks. But what you said is so right, man. If you take a person with the highest, highest, highest of the risk profiles and you put them in the right environment, no EMFs, organic diet, pristine clean water,
00:22:39
Speaker
low stress, the right macronutrient ratios, a solid aerobic slash anaerobic sort of exercise program, sport, whatever, sleeping well, eight hours a night. I guarantee you that person will easily live into their 80s. It could be even 90s if they continue that lifestyle and continue not accumulating toxins and detoxing themselves. So this genetic stuff is definitely a little bit of a scapegoat.
00:23:10
Speaker
I love what you say. We have to do what we can to teach our kids the right habits early on. Actually, one of the cheapest organic things we can buy here is liver, dude. Chicken liver and hearts.
00:23:23
Speaker
A packet of that is like six, seven euro, that's like eight dollars or whatever, and you get like three chicken liver, sometimes four, and two to four chicken hearts, and heart has coenzyme Q10, it has peptides, you know, these peptides that are super expensive to buy, you get like
00:23:42
Speaker
One milligram or two milligrams or 20 milligrams of a peptide could cost you like a hundred fifty two hundred dollars And you get these peptides inside you know stomach and all the organ meats So I'm trying to introduce what not not I'm trying to My daughter's been eating liver probably since the age of six months eight months whatever and she loves it as soon as I give her a little bite the next thing I hear as soon as she swallowed it is I
00:24:08
Speaker
more, you know, more, more, more. So absolutely, we have to do what we can to instill the right habits because I think it's, like you said, birthday parties, school, peer pressure, not peer pressure, but peer influence. As soon as that child is a little bit older, those things are inevitable. So if we at least have some type of baseline
00:24:30
Speaker
to work with baseline health, baseline, you know, good nutrition and habits and tastes. So the palate that the child has and the microbiota the child has that, you know, is not inflammatory, not dysbiotic. Then, you know, we're setting our kid up or kids up for success. Otherwise, you know, if you say, well, it's all it's all like crap, we might as well eat whatever. Well, then it's like it's a double whammy. You go outside to the restaurants, you're screwed. You're at home, you're screwed. So what's the point, right?
Understanding Food Origins
00:25:01
Speaker
Yeah, and eating at home, at least you have more control over what they're being fed. That's the other thing, too, when you go out to eat and whatnot. You don't know what quality the stuff you're getting. I go to local butcher shops all the time. And since my kids are real little, I would bring them there. And it's funny because they're not sensitive to seeing meat cut or a little bit of blood or whatever.
00:25:30
Speaker
just like I'm not sensitive to it. And I remember growing up and the first time seeing my parents skin a rabbit, it was just like, oh, okay, that's how you do it.
00:25:39
Speaker
You know, I see my mother with like blood on her and my dad and they're just getting a rabbit. And to me, it was just food. You know, some people would would see it as like murder or whatever. But like to me, it was just like, oh, they're preparing food because I had this understanding of where food came from. My parents always had animals around. I saw them kill stuff. I would go to the butcher shop with them. So I I didn't have this detachment from what food is and where it comes from. And I think that's something that's lost to with kids is that they don't really understand like what they're eating. And
00:26:09
Speaker
you know, why they're eating it and where it comes from and what preparation it takes to to, you know, get it to your plate. And to me, it's like, OK, I like the fact I can bring my kids to the butcher shop. They see the stakes cut. They, you know, they understand. And then it's just not a big deal to them. It's like, OK, that life eats life. That's how we survive. And there's also appreciation to it like my parents
00:26:32
Speaker
When they have chickens go missing or they have a goat or a chicken found dead somewhere and a fox killed it, they're angry. They're very upset. I mean, they got pissed at their dog for, they thought, killed one of the chickens. And the average person's like, well, you're gonna kill it anyways. Yeah, but it's going to waste. They don't waste that animal's life. They appreciate that animal's life. So growing up, I understood that
00:27:03
Speaker
take the time because I would say to them, I'm like, all this work that takes to like feed the goats, you know, it'd be, you know, cold in the winter. You know, I live in New England and it's like cold in the winter. You have to go outside and make sure all the chickens are are locked up and all the stuff like it seems like it's just it's a lot of work. You just go buy chicken. But it's like it was so much. Why are you investing this work? But it's like their investment in feeding these animals, keeping them alive until they eat them. It's also why they appreciate these animals.
00:27:31
Speaker
and they don't want their lives to be lost and nobody getting anything out of it. They were raised on a farm in Northern Portugal, and it's where I was born. Well, I was born in Chaz, but we're close to that. And it was just one of those things where you grew up around animals. You appreciated these animals. You did love the... People would talk about, oh, I couldn't do that because I would get connected or emotionally attached to these animals.
00:28:00
Speaker
Well, and they say it almost in a way like these farmers aren't. And I'm like, no, no, no, you got it wrong. They are also emotionally connected. I've seen my parents very upset when they find a chicken dead or a goat dead because of a fox or coyote or whatever. I'm like, they do love these animals, but they also understand they're not
00:28:20
Speaker
Ignorant to the fact that we need to eat to stay alive and if they don't eat this animal They're gonna be just eating another goat that somebody else killed and probably lived a much less Fulfilling life because at least in my parents backyard, they let them live for a long time. They they're around other animals They're not treated poorly, you know any of this after eating, you know a lot of times leftover so it's like better food than just corn, you know, like I
00:28:48
Speaker
a lot of these factory farms do. So I think that's a big part of it too, like having, making sure your kids have that connection to what food is, also have an appreciation for animals. Like I love the fact my, you know, when my kids go to my parents' house, they can't wait to go in the backyard and see the rabbits and the chickens and the cats and the dogs. And they have this connection to the animal world and the animal life. And, you know, to me, I think it's gonna,
00:29:18
Speaker
you know, that relationship with animals is going to build on their whole worldview and mold a worldview and understanding nature and our connection to how everything's connected to one another. And I think that's really important too. So.
00:29:35
Speaker
Yeah, I mean, it's it does get difficult.
Natural Health Approaches
00:29:38
Speaker
I mean, my kids also take vitamins. I'm a big believer of of getting outside. You're right. Playing outside fresh air, sun. My kids rarely ever wear sunscreen like maybe if like the very first time they're they get hit with sun and they haven't really got a tan yet.
00:29:56
Speaker
is really, really strong and we're outside all day. But I'm like, for the most part, maybe once a year I put sunscreen on them. Like once I get tan, they're good.
00:30:08
Speaker
to me, like I think that especially like like I said, I live in New England. In Massachusetts, most people are vitamin D deficient and then all summer they're just bloating up on sunscreen, which has chemicals, which obviously aren't good for you. And then also you're basically deflecting the sun from, you know, being absorbed. So I'm like, now you're not getting any vitamin D when you can get vitamin D. So I'm a big believer of that, you know, being outside.
00:30:36
Speaker
exercising, you know, as you probably know, and I'm sure many my listeners know, my kids aren't vaccinated. They've never been vaccinated. I'm a big believer of like giving them foods that will help increase the strength of their immune system and then making sure they're healthy and they exercise and they're happy. Like you said, stress is a big part too. Kids can be stressed, you know,
00:31:00
Speaker
kids can feel the stress of the parents. They might not be stressed because of anything that's going on in their lives, but if you're stressed, they can sense that, which leads to them stressing out. I remember talking to a guy that got divorced and he talked about how
00:31:17
Speaker
him and his wife were trying to make it work after they had the baby and the baby would cry and cry and cry and cry. And then they got divorced and him and his ex-wife would be like, the baby doesn't really cry much anymore. And she's like, no, she doesn't. And then they started thinking about it and like all that friction that they were, you know, trying to make things work, all that friction that the baby could sense it. And they say like babies when they're born, they don't have linguistic skills. So they actually have better,
00:31:45
Speaker
Well, they can pick up on social cues better because you're limited to basically only using those things to know what's going on around you. And they actually say like as you kids start talking, they actually lose a little bit of their ability to pick up on social cues because they end up depending on language more for communication.
00:32:06
Speaker
But when they're little, like we always think like, oh, they can't tell that we're mad or they can't tell that we're fighting or we don't get it. It's like, no, they can. And that can affect them. And, you know, you look at like the blue, the blue zones, which I have a huge issue with, you know, everybody says, oh, you know, because a lot of times they use the blue zone studies to demonize meat or whatever.
Community and Stress Relief
00:32:29
Speaker
All the diets are different in all those spots where supposedly people live the longest. The one common thing, and I think I talked about this with Rob Wolf when he was on recently, who was the paleo guy, and I'm sure many of your listeners probably know who he is. He opened the first CrossFit gym in America, also started Element Electrolytes. And he talked about how the one common thing with all the Blue Zones is community. Most of them live in small communities that
00:32:59
Speaker
They have good relationships with people. A lot of them are outside. They work outside. So it's like I think health. A lot of times we we talk about the first two things. And I think it's really important is like diet and exercise. Like those two things are very important. But I think sometimes we minimize how important some of these other things are, too, like, you know. Being able to deal with stress and being able to have community, being mentally and emotionally at peace.
00:33:28
Speaker
you know people who meditate people who do I mean yoga obviously it is a workout and I know because I've done it and I feel like a wuss when I do it because I'm like I don't know how this lady with yoga pants is not sweating and shaking like I am but um but you know I also think it's also
00:33:47
Speaker
It's very relaxing, you know, like you're just there with your thoughts. It's usually in a very calm atmosphere. It's, you know, like I said, it's slow. It's not like intense. And I think one of the reasons why it's really picked up a lot of attention and steam is because of people need that. Like you need to find something somewhere, you know, if it is in sports, if it's in yoga, if it's in painting, going for a walk,
00:34:17
Speaker
you know, grounding yourself, you know, people walking on grass without shoes to just find that piece. And I think relieving yourself with some stress is super important. I mean, they talk about, I'm sure you've heard of the study where they talk about like, I don't know, over like 60 or $70,000 a year. If you make more money than that, it doesn't make you any happier. And I think that they almost worded that incorrectly. I think what they should have said was,
00:34:46
Speaker
It doesn't, you know, up to 60, $70,000 a year. It's not that up to that makes you happy. I think it relieves stress. I think a lot of people when they're making less money and you're trying to figure out how you're going to pay the bills, how am I going to.
00:35:00
Speaker
pay for the groceries, all these things, I think it creates stress. And then once you make a certain amount of money to just relieve yourself of some of that stress, then you feel like, okay, yeah, it brought me some happiness. And that's why more than that doesn't really bring you any more happiness because the things that make you happy aren't those things.
00:35:17
Speaker
The beautiful thing about kids, too, is it kind of reminds you some of those things. It reminds you that, you know, you don't need to like money doesn't make you happy. And kids don't care if you raise them in a hundred thousand dollar house or one million dollar house. They just want the parents to be around and they just want their friends to be around and they just want to smile and laugh and play and learn from playing. You know, like I think one of the biggest problems with with like the world we live in right now is
00:35:48
Speaker
are over analyzing of our children's cognitive and physical progression.
Children's Development and Play
00:35:53
Speaker
Like, I don't know how would it. Are you still living in Portugal by any chance? OK, yeah, I don't know how Portugal is. And but like I said, I was born there, but I came at a young age and. In America, they want to quantify everything, so it's like.
00:36:09
Speaker
You go to a pediatrician like and I would I would never go to a pediatrician because my kids are vaccinated. So I go like like every six months, I would I would go just check their height and weight and whatever. And. But every time you go there, they're like, they should be doing this at this age, they should be doing that at that age, they should be talking at this age, you know, they should be using silverware, they should be, you know, like all these things, it's like they they quantum and I look back and I'm like,
00:36:33
Speaker
I was born in a house with no running water in Portugal. I'm like, my parents were farmers. I'm like, you know, they they came. They worked in Switzerland for some time and then to make some money. Then they came to America. And it's like they I mean, I'm positive they were the least of their worries were like, oh, my kids
00:36:53
Speaker
to and not saying like 10 words yet, you know, or whatever it may be. You know, like those just weren't really concerns. And so I think sometimes like parents panic because they're like, oh, your kids are not talking yet or not talking enough yet, or your kids too active. Let's put them on something that mellows them out. You know, like all this ADHD stuff, you know, it drives me nuts. My son is probably one of the most active people I've ever met. He does not sit still. I mean, he I mean, he literally will just go. He's either like
00:37:23
Speaker
you know gas floored or he's he's on the break and he's finally out cold at the end of the night but it takes a lot to get him to be that tired but
00:37:34
Speaker
I get it because I was like that. I mean, I was the kid at the basketball court that would be like, hey, let's play one more game. Like, dude, you're not tired. Like, oh, come on, one more. One more. You know, I remember going to the basketball courts at like noontime. You know, we'd meet up with some friends at noontime. Then, you know, those friends left. But then more kids showed up. So now you're playing against them. And I remember coming home like six to like 10 hours later and my mother would be like, where the hell were you? I'm like, oh, I was at the basketball court. And she thought I was lying. She's like, there's no way
00:38:01
Speaker
and you could be at a basketball court for that many hours. I'm like, yeah, you end up talking and then you're like, the kids leave and then you're just kind of chilling, you're tired. And then some more kids show up like, hey, you wanna play some three on three? Like, why not? And then you spend all day there. And it's like, that's the way kids should be, they should be playing. And they can learn from playing. This idea of like, oh, because your kids aren't killing it in school,
00:38:29
Speaker
maybe they're not intelligent. It's like you have like this very small box that you want to put every kid in and you think every kid should be this cookie cutter child that everybody should be at the exact same level and all these things. And you only use this one method to decide if this kid's intelligent or where he should be. Like Mike, my son, for example, being a big soccer fan, he could, I mean, his geography when he started going to school was crazy because he would, he could find France, Portugal, he could find, you know,
00:38:59
Speaker
Latin America, you could find, you know, countries in Africa, he could, because he wanted to know where all his favorite players were from, or where his favorite clubs are from, or whatever. So he started learning these things. He also learned numbers, right? So he would be like, Oh, what numbers whoever it's like,
00:39:14
Speaker
you know, Alexander Arnold. Oh, he's 66. Oh, they're 66. So I remember when we first started going to school, my his teacher, like, how does he know all these large numbers already? And I'm like, from soccer, I'm like, from from basically just watching soccer and playing soccer and playing FIFA and all the, you know, all these things. So it's like,
00:39:32
Speaker
kids learn from playing. I remember I had a Darce, what the hell was her name? She was the University of Notre Dame's professor of psychology, but she does. Oh, she'd be a great guest for you. I probably have suggested her to you in the past, but no, I don't think so. She writes.
00:39:50
Speaker
Yeah, she writes a lot of books on parenting and just like how, you know, you shouldn't let your kids cry it out. Like this idea that like it's basically it's almost like, you know, you're told like it's OK to let your kids cry it out and then just and she's like they've shown studies where it ends up leading to them being
00:40:13
Speaker
less secure, more fearful, like there's a negative impacts of these things, you know, and, and there's no such thing as like holding your kid enough. There's no such like, in other words, like, we should be parenting the way our primitive ancestors parented, right? You nurture, you care for them. You know, and also like this idea of like having everybody involved, having the community involved, everybody helping each other out, you know, that's, that's the thing like back in the day, you know, you could
00:40:39
Speaker
You had your dad was a plumber. Your mom could stay at home. Your dad was a mechanic. Your mom could say now it's like you need two incomes to be broke. Right. And it's like it's just one of those things where it's it's it's like who raises the kid then. So it's like I'm at work all day. My wife's at work all day. The kid goes from school. So the curious
00:41:01
Speaker
curious, they're asking questions, they're trying to understand the world around them and trying to figure themselves out. So who's influencing those things? Other kids who could come from shitty parents and have shitty perspectives, and then teachers who might have different perspectives and opinions than you on how the world works and all those type of things.
00:41:22
Speaker
The kids go to sports after school and then they're at sports. They go to practice. They're around other people, other adults, other kids. And then you come home, you feed them, you put them in the bed and they do the same thing over and over again. So it's like who, you know, and a lot of these kids who go to daycare or whatever, it's like.
00:41:39
Speaker
How much of an impact do you have in your kid's life? Nobody's going to love that child more than the parents. That's just the honest truth. If you're a daycare or if you're a schoolteacher, you're just hoping you can send them back home alive and well with very little complaints.
00:42:00
Speaker
You're not having much of an impact on their lives if they're constantly around other people and then by the end of the day, you're so tired that it's like, okay, now I just want to like have dinner and be left alone or I just want to have dinner and have minimal communication and conversation with children, you know, and it's and unfortunately, that's kind of the world you live in. So who ends up?
00:42:21
Speaker
impacting your children the most is the school system or it's whatever, the daycare or whatever. So it's not you or it's YouTube, right? Now they're spending time on YouTube and you're seeing more and more of that. And to me, it's almost like people are deciding to have kids, but they don't want any of the responsibility of actually or
00:42:45
Speaker
They want to minimize the responsibility of having kids.
Balancing Career and Family
00:42:49
Speaker
Like your kids should be with you often. You know, your kids should, you know, you should like if you if you want to just be career oriented, then that's OK. Like there's people who just say, hey, I don't want to start a family. I'd rather focus all my time and energy on my career and getting ahead. Maybe one day I want to have a family. That's OK. Now what we're getting is this hybrid of like people who actually
00:43:15
Speaker
They think they want to start a family or they want to start a family and have a career. So one of them gets gets punished. And usually it's a child. Right. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Brilliant, bro. Like you're an absolute I knew you're going to deliver. You just I know everyone that I'm going to interview will be an expert in their own children. Right.
00:43:39
Speaker
So I don't necessarily expect anyone like a parent that's, you know, no formal education and this doesn't work with kids specifically. I don't expect them to be an expert on anything per se. But like when I talk to you, like, dude, you could fucking write a book on the stuff on on how to raise healthy kids, you know, because like everything you said absolutely resonates with me, you know, and these are the same conversations that we're having with our wife, you know, it's like,
00:44:06
Speaker
Okay, well, if we're just calculating the costs of daycare or preschool or whatever else, then I'm like, what you said is exactly what I said. I was interviewing another podcast a month ago, but I said the same thing to the dude. I was like, nobody, I can see it with our nanny. She's an absolute angel. Love her. She's amazing. I call her our rent-a-granny. That's how awesome she is. She's like a grandma to my daughter.
00:44:32
Speaker
I can see that like it's in the little things she would not love obviously she cannot and nobody can love our daughter the way we love our daughter and nobody can take as good care of her you know what I mean like you can see these little things
00:44:49
Speaker
So it's a hard pill to swallow for a lot of people because for me, it's such a joy that when I wake up in the morning where I'm freshest, even when I was working with this American company for the last couple of years before, up until February,
00:45:05
Speaker
I was because I had to be on U.S. time. I would have to start working only like two p.m., three p.m., four p.m., stuff like that. So the first, the most energetic time of the day is the time I get to spend with my daughter. You know, it's amazing because by now, eight o'clock now here,
00:45:22
Speaker
I just want to get her showered, fed and in bed so I can just, you know, collapse somewhere. But yeah, really, really awesome stuff, bro. Can you let's let's cover
00:45:37
Speaker
Let's cover this. Oh, by the way, something I just remembered. You were talking about your son being very active, and I was watching Doug Stanhope, the comedian, a couple of days ago, and he said that over the course of his life,
00:45:54
Speaker
They've tried to get them on like Ritalin or like stuff for ADHD and stuff. And they will tell them like, you know, you're constantly like, you're constantly like changing subjects. You're constantly like, you know, starting new conversations like, yeah, that's because I have a lot of thoughts, you know, I'm that kind of person. I have a lot of thoughts. I think about a lot of things, you know, and then.
00:46:14
Speaker
they'd be like, yeah, okay, but you're not paying any attention to what I'm saying. It's like, yeah, because the thoughts I'm having right now are much more interesting than what you're saying to me right now. You know, you're not interesting to me. So I think this is definitely, this ADHD stuff is way overblown. In fact, you know, obviously it's diet. Diet can be a cause of the factor in hyperactivity or a lot of energy. It's also
00:46:38
Speaker
Also, the fact that what are we using to treat hyperactivity? We're using amphetamines. So, you know, hello? Anyway, that's a whole separate topic for another podcast.