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Holidate
29 Plays1 month ago
Emma & Katie try hard to discuss 2020's Holidate, but mostly talk about Chicago, malls, whatever "Top Golf" is, pretty much anything except this forgettable movie.
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Transcript
Adult Themes in Hallmark-like Movies
00:00:33
Speaker
Uh, basically a Hallmark movie if in a few of the scenes they, they fucked. Right. Um, it's great. It's Laurie Gilmore. Okay. I'm sure that's your real name. Right. Laurie Gilmore. Uh-huh. Lorelei Gilmore. Wink, wink, nudge, nudge. Oh, she's got, oh my God. She's got a million of them and they're all, yeah they're all published in 2024 and 2025. And they're all this yeah the, the cinnamon bun bookstore, the Christmas tree farm, the strawberry patch pancake house.
00:01:03
Speaker
The Gingerbread Bankery. They're so cozy. ah It is a series. It's specific. Yeah, they all take place in I think it's, um, well, yesterday Dream Harbor. Dream Harbor, Massachusetts. It's a tiny little coastal town yeah outside of Boston.
Pseudonyms and Real Authorship
00:01:23
Speaker
Melissa Mcturnan is her name. Oh, okay. So it really isn't Lori Gilmore. No.
00:01:31
Speaker
But that's not the wreck. So I finished that, which is great. um You know, it is what it is. But then I started this book called Bunny. You've heard of Bunny? Yeah, I've heard of Bunny. Yeah. It's great. Yeah. I'm all about it. I mean, I'm only like a third of the way through. Yeah. Yeah. It has very mixed reviews. I've picked it up in a bookstore and ended up not buying it before. Yeah.
00:01:58
Speaker
I think you'd really like it. It's like Heather's meets when ah the bell jar. like it It's really great. It's all about a master's program of creative writing ah at a fictional Ivy League um the in New England. And a girl, it's basically the plot of Heathers. She becomes friends with the people the like popular girl, so she doesn't think that she's going to become friends with.
00:02:30
Speaker
yeah and And like weirdness ensues. I mean, I'm not very far in it. I know that there's going to be some twists and turns. Yeah. There's already like bunnies that are popping up left and right. It's great. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. It's really good. Um, so that's my book cover too. Yeah.
00:02:50
Speaker
Yeah. Emma's Burger Crack. Do you have any recommendations? Um, let's see.
90s Nostalgia: Inheriting an Inn
00:02:58
Speaker
I finished my, um, I finished another hockey romance. Um, what am I reading right now? I'm reading, oh, I don't remember what it's called. A lot of them have really generic titles, you know? Um, oh, it's, it's some 90s song I can remember. It's set in 1997 and it's like,
00:03:14
Speaker
she She inherits an inn from her mom who died and she's moved across the country to Vermont to run this bed and breakfast and he he lives next door and he owns the bakery in town and he has, he's a single dad with two adorable daughters and you know. Amazing. I love that. I love that. She's from the city and has a hard heart and he's the good nature soft boy.
00:03:42
Speaker
She's from the city. Yeah. She's like, I don't understand why these guests don't like me. I just tell it how it is. Yeah. I don't remember what it's called. It's, um, but yeah, it's set in 1997, which is interesting. And then, uh, the title is, um, it's, it's, it's a line from a 90 song. I don't, it's not coming. Okay. There's, there's one that I'm thinking of, but it's a horror book that's been on my list. So I don't think it's, that I don't think it's head like a hole. Is it head like a hole?
00:04:11
Speaker
not head like a hole no um although i mean that is a 90 song um let's see i mean i've got my kindle app right here it is called nope not that one yeah wow what a book title um if it makes you happy by julie olivia which again is not a real person's name it's not her name it's not her name yeah it doesn't even sound like a name like olivia is not a last name No, it would be like Olivier or Oliver. Yeah, whatever. Anyways, that was Katie's book recs. Katie's book recs. It was great.
Podcast Adventures with Emma and Katie
00:04:56
Speaker
um So books, famously featured in today's film. ah hu um And that's right, guys, you guessed it. This is Go Get Your Girl. It's the podcast where Emma and Katie are just
00:05:10
Speaker
single because they're just single and they work from home in their pajamas and everybody hates that they're single and apparently every single holiday that ever was needs a date question mark? So they find a dashing Australian man to bring around with them. Who unfortunately is the second hottest person in this movie, unfortunately, the hottest man in this movie. Yes. Wait, who's the hottest man in this movie to you? Farooq.
00:05:39
Speaker
I was gonna say, is it Farooq? Yeah. You mean the doctor who's good with kids? Yeah, Farooq is way hotter than whatever that man's name, Jackson. Yeah, sorry. Yeah, yeah, whatever. Australian guy. um But that's right, guys. I'm Emma. And I'm Katie. And we are talking about Holiday. Holiday. Not the holiday, but holiday. And not holidays, which technically they are, but holiday. That would be more correct. Yeah. um The poster of this movie is ridiculous. She's biting her lip and rolling her eyes.
00:06:23
Speaker
um This is a Netflix, a holiday from 2020. It's a Netflix original R-rated rom-com. which we also read the rom-coms on this show. Yeah, we do. Directed by John Whitesell, who directed Big Mama's House 2.
00:06:43
Speaker
Not the original Big Mama's House, but Big Mama's House 2 and the straight-to-DVD third one, which I don't remember the name of. Big Mama's House 3? It's not called that. It's called, like, Big Mama Little Baby or something weird like that. Hold on, I'll look at it.
00:06:59
Speaker
I just want to say, Big Mama's House franchise. Big Mama's House 2, the Squeak Will. It's Big Mama's, like father, like son. That's what it's called. And that was in 2011, five years after Big Mama's House 2 in 2000. Actually, that title doesn't even make sense. There's six years in between Big Mama's House and Big Mama's House 2. Well, I think Big Mama's colon, like father, like son, Martin Lawrence is no longer involved. And it's like his son is now doing it for some reason.
00:07:28
Speaker
What? I thought it was no sense. Oh no, Martin Lawrence, isn't it? brand Martin Lawrence and Brandon T. Jackson. um Is it like Big Mama's son is like? Yeah, I believe that's what it is. Yeah. But like Father Like Son takes it all out of the. Yeah, it is. Actually, it is. I'm sorry. It is. It was released in theaters. It looks like. Yeah, it was not so to DVD.
00:07:53
Speaker
Well then, good for you, Big Mama's House franchise. Yeah. And it made money. It made a ton of money.
Humor in Film Franchises
00:07:59
Speaker
Jesus Christ. Well, good for them. The Big Mama's House franchise is very successful. Is it produced by Tyler Perry? No. No, it is not. Oh, OK. I mean, I don't think so. I was going to say, Tyler Perry, anything he touches makes money. That's true. I mean, but Tyler Perry makes movies for like $2 million also, which helps. Yeah.
00:08:22
Speaker
um Yeah, they spent 30 to the budget on this was $32 million dollars and it made $82.3 million dollars in back when they made movies for mid budgets. Right? Good for Martin Lawrence. I guess so. um Yeah. Yeah. So that's not what we talked about though.
00:08:42
Speaker
Oh, also this movie is written by Tiffany Paulson, ah who wrote the ah the Nancy Drew movie starring a favorite name, Emma Roberts. And yeah also another Emma Roberts rom-com called About Fate, um which I've seen and is not very good. And she also did the remake of Adventures in Babysitting, which I have not seen. Oh, yeah, no. Why do we have to do that? Why? um I mean, the original one does not hold up. I don't know if you've seen it recently.
00:09:10
Speaker
I have not. I only remember like the one scene where she's like dancing in her room. Oh, sure. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. yeah That's the best part. um Yeah. The rest of the movie is mostly about how terrifying and crime filled Chicago is. And I know it's set in the 80s and everything or like to came out in the 80s. But like, yeah, very much like the way Donald Trump describes Chicago on Fox News. You know, Jesus Christ. Chicago is a hell of a hole in that movie.
00:09:39
Speaker
I can attest that it was not a hellhole. My parents lived in Chicago in the 80s. Sure, there you go. And they're alive. There's dodging bullets in the street in Adventures in Babies thing. That's wild.
00:09:52
Speaker
um Wow, goodness. So she has got a thing for Emma Roberts. Yeah, I mean, they're probably friends, I would imagine. i don't Probably, yeah. um And this movie is is an Emma Roberts vehicle. It is yeah very much Emma Roberts persona, where she plays a um Have a say, bitch, I guess. How you say, le bitch? Listen, I don't know Emma Roberts personally. I'm sure she's a very lovely person, but her onscreen persona is primarily playing, you know,
00:10:25
Speaker
harder women I would say. Which is like kind of I mean I find it kind of liberating for her because when she started out as a child actor and you know was Nancy Drew and had to do all these sort of like bubblegummy like teen roles and stuff and
Edgy Roles and Comfort Movies
00:10:44
Speaker
then finally when she found her voice she really leaned into it and I think that one of the first Things that really, it was either Scream Queens or. um Coven. Coven, where it like really started to show that she can flourish as this character. Mm hmm. Yeah, she a lot of her a lot of her roles are are like that. um She um what is it? She's in the we're the Millers. um or She's a con woman. um yeah She's I mean, Scream Four is a big one. Spoilers for Scream Four.
00:11:21
Speaker
But there's a lot of a lot of her movie, and even her rom-coms are like that as well, where she is just, she has an edge to her that a lot of a lot of women of her generation who do a lot of rom-coms, which she does do a lot of rom-coms, don't do that, same don't have that same kind of on-screen persona. Exactly, yeah. If you were to put her in Tamea the Shrew, she'd be the Shrew. Sure, yeah, yeah.
00:11:50
Speaker
What movie did I see? Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah. Did you see Space Cadet, the movie she made this year where she like becomes an astronaut? No, I heard that was awful. it's I don't know. I thought it was kind of cute. How was it? I don't know. I like Emma. Caitlin hates Emma Roberts. um Really? Yeah, I don't know. Like she goes, she just seems like a bitch. I'm like, well, you know.
00:12:11
Speaker
I mean, I don't think she's so much of a bitch, but that's because there was like this really great interview that I listened to that she did. It was on a podcast. I cannot tell you the name of the podcast. But she it was like a very in-depth interview with her. And she went into a lot of detail into sort of her neuroses. And she's just really like, um ah not ADD. She's really OCD. like She's very OCD. And she has a lot of, like,
00:12:40
Speaker
uh irrational fears and so she's just very like specific on things and i think that that's just sort of it sometimes translates to bitchiness sure yeah yeah yeah um and you know some so people have ah an on-screen persona and sometimes that's similar to their actual what they're like in real life and sometimes it's not That's true. Yeah, no, Space Cadet, I should say, is not a good movie. It's also not a rom-com. um It says, I just looked it up right here, and it says, ra it says it's a rom-com, but it's not. on But it is, it's very, it's very silly, and it's not good, but I don't know. It was 90 minutes long, and I enjoyed it, but I have...
00:13:21
Speaker
I have a podcast about movies that a lot of them aren't very good, but we like anyway. So who am I to say? Our last film was titled Hot Frosty. Yeah. And this movie is not very good, let's be honest. Yeah. I mean, I told Charlie at the end, I was like, this is not one of the movies that when I first saw it, I said to myself, yes, I will watch this yeah three more times. I know. I've seen it so many times. I've seen it so many times.
00:13:51
Speaker
it's there's there's an itch that it scratches i don't know what it is because and because and and this is one of the things where i was finishing watching it this morning before going to work and kaitlyn was getting ready to go to work and she's like what the fuck is this she's like this is awful like all these people are awful kaitlyn's review we have a kaitlyn's corner kaitlyn's corner kaitlyn's where she says is this movie about a bunch of people with brain damage
00:14:17
Speaker
the podcast I mean, I feel like a little bit yes because they're all convinced that they live in Chicago. You know, OK, all right. all right So should we get just get right into it? Because like actually, I think this movie actually takes some pains to make it look like Chicago, unlike a lot of movies. A little bit. Like, her apartment, that looks like a Chicago apartment building. It really does. His apartment, it looks like a Chicago apartment. Also, yeah. Yeah. Yeah. um But like, there, I think my biggest piece. I think last last episode, I said it was Canada, but it's shot in Atlanta.
00:14:53
Speaker
in Atlanta. Yeah. I think my biggest beef was that there were two things that made me really angry, but they said it was Chicago. One was when we're at her house, it's apparently in Logan Square. Yeah. And there's a yard and the houses aren't piled on top of each other. It's it's a house in Logan Square. Yeah, it's true. So it's it's not a house in Logan Square. It's a house in Skokie. Yeah. Yeah. I mean, I don't know. i I imagine there's probably houses in Logan Square, but Yeah, there I mean, there are, but they're all, as someone who is house hunting in Chicago for a while, I can tell you, they're all on top of one another. Oh yeah, they're like like so like right next to another. Yeah, that makes sense. Yeah, like you have an alley between you and your neighbor. Yeah. um
00:15:40
Speaker
Yeah. And the other one? Oh, oh the second one was, I will give it to them. They found a neighborhood and they named them all after it. Oh yeah. But the Lakeview Mall? The Lakeview Mall? I can tell you the only mall that I know of in Lakeview is on Diversey and like Ashland, or no wait, Diversey and Yeah, it's it's like Lincoln Square Lakeview. And that was falling apart in 2015. Yeah, that's not there anymore. I don't think there's a mall there anymore. um There was only a Victoria's Secret and a movie theater.
00:16:20
Speaker
On Ashland and Diversity? Yeah, I don't know where that is at all. are No, wait. Maybe it was Belmont and Diversity. It's that like weird triangle where there's the stand donuts and the Trader Joe's and then the Urban Outfitters. Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. There's, I mean, Charlie's favorite. There's a cheeky Nando's there. There is a cheeky Nando's there. We've been to that cheeky Nando's. I think that might be Clark and Diversity. I'm not sure. Oh, sorry. Clark and Diversity. I don't i've a i don't know. like Chicago heads ah sound off in the comments, I guess. I don't know.
00:16:49
Speaker
Not my neighborhood. But you guys know that mall? That's the only mall I know in Lakeview. Yeah, there's there's no there's there's not a lot of malls anywhere in America. um Yes. And especially like that look like this. like it's It's an Atlanta mall for sure. but like Oh, for sure. Again, two Chicago mall girls here watching this. that a You've got the downtown mall, 50 on 50 or whatever it's called. like ah Yeah, Block 54. Yeah, Block 54. And then there's Water Tower Place. yes Both of which are very like unique looking. They're not yeah really malls. They're like no eight floors of ah ah yeah of ah of a skyscraper that have been turned into shops. yeah
00:17:34
Speaker
And then like there's the Simogones, which if he, like, okay, I keep forgetting, he doesn't live in Evanston. That girl that he was dating lived in Evanston. Yeah, that girl lives in Evanston. He lives in the city. Okay, okay. Yeah. So that would make, and she, and we're not really sure where she lives because her parents live in Logan Square. I guess from the, from the skyline that it showed, she probably also lives in Logan or Wicker based on the view from supposed view of of the city from her house because it looks well you're facing east and you can see yeah here's tower um in front she does give off uh like wicker park look and square vibes yeah yeah for sure yeah um all of this for people who are not from chicago i'm sure is very boring
00:18:20
Speaker
Can I tell you my story about the um the water tower place mall? Absolutely, yes. One of the first places I ever went in Chicago, by the way. Are you serious? Yeah, yeah. It's a great mall. I mean, it was. It's kind of falling apart now. I haven't been there in a long time. But the American Girl Store is there. that The American Girl Store is still there. you You said we would go sometime, but we had never been. I know. I know. Well, the next time I'm in Chicago, we're going to go brunch there. But although now that we know about Angelina's,
00:18:47
Speaker
Oh, that's true, yeah. Nothing ever. Maybe think don we don't need to get completely wasted like we do every time we go to Angelina. But like, i might here's my compliment. What if we just bring some American Girl dolls to Angelina's? Oh, no, I don't think so. I don't think we need to do that. And ask for two little tiny high chairs for the dolls.
00:19:13
Speaker
Um, no. I think that we will get asked to leave if we do that. I don't know. I don't know, Katie. I think they'd be into it. Oh my god.
00:19:25
Speaker
This is all to say that Emma was just in Chicago a few weeks ago, and Emma, Katie, Caitlin, and Charlie went to brunch at this fabulous restaurant in Lakeview called Angelina's, which is an Italian place on the weekends. They have champagne brunches that are have a great time. And then you wander around Lakeview wasted.
00:19:54
Speaker
Um, yeah, yeah. Um, not finding them all, but, um, no wandering around record stores, getting, getting chatted at by old man. I completely forgot about that, by the way. I forgot about that too. I also forgot about the dog. The fucking dog that we saw that was like had a hat on leaning out of the car arm on the window. Like he was a person. Yeah. Yes. And I have like the Instagram handle on the car. What did that man talk to us about?
00:20:23
Speaker
Oh, redheads. Redheads. Yeah, and I didn't have the heart to tell him neither of us are natural redheads because he bought it. Like, he was like, you know, redhead jeans and like went on and on and on. Yeah, I know he went on and on and on about redheads. And we were both like, uh-huh. We were both crossfaded and like had no nothing to say. Yes, yes. It was a wild time. Yeah. Boy, oh boy. And then we went and did karaoke. Well, Emma and Caitlin did karaoke. Yeah, yeah. It was a great time, not by all. I don't see you in public, sorry.
Humorous Anecdotes and Misadventures
00:20:53
Speaker
And then we forced Katie and Caitlin to go to the Jewel Oscar that Emma and Charlie used to go to when they were poor. We needed more alcohol for some reason. Yep, we bought more alcohol, a case of cider. And we missed our train. Yeah, we missed our train. And we went back to Katie and Caitlin's and forced them to watch a music video for one of Emma's high school ban Oh, that's right. That's right. I forgot about that as well. But do you remember what you said at the end of it after we finished Shift of Fate's music video? No, I do not. You said that actually wasn't terrible. I always imagined they were bad, but they were pretty good. That doesn't sound like something I would say. That is what you said! Pretty good is probably pretty strong. Again, I don't remember what it sounded like at all.
00:21:41
Speaker
Well, you enjoyed it. Okay, if you say so. Hashtag Shiftedfates. Hashtag shifted baits. But anyways, I'll have to be said. None of this is the story about the water tower place. No. So when I first moved to Chicago, I was in a soul sucking, receptionist job that I hated. Where did you discuss that on the show before? Uh-huh. Yep. I'm just not a desk job person, and one of my bosses was mean, one of my bosses was nice, but the mean one always was a lot meaner than the nice one was nice. um And i so I was like leaving work one day and I got the bus up to water tower because I wanted to go to Bath and Body Works. I just, I'd had a long shitty day and I just, I wanted, your girl needed some candles. and Sometimes you need a peach ballini. Yeah, um you just, miniitizer Exactly.
00:22:39
Speaker
but and so Two for 24, three with candles. Yeah, hell yeah. um Oh, Japanese cherry blossom. ah I love Japanese cherry blossom. So good. yeah So good.
00:22:50
Speaker
thanks so i So in Water Tower Place, which is this weird 80s looking like mall. Very neon, very 80s. Yeah, very like steel, very like cold, a lot of water fixtures. Yeah, well it's in Water Tower, which is, it's not in the Hancock building, but it's right there, right? Yeah, it's right there. And so the only... It means nothing. People are not from Chicago.
00:23:17
Speaker
The only way, so Bath & Body Works is of course one of like two stores on like the top floor of this mall. Oh, okay. And you can either take the- It's like a six or seven floor mall, yeah.
00:23:29
Speaker
yeah it's like very there's a lot of stairs you can either take the stairs or you can't where you have to be behind slow people or you can wait forever for the normal elevator or there's an express elevator because it's on the same floor as the baseball hall of fame that's also there the baseball hall of fame is in the water or place Yeah, it's like something like that. And it's got Larry or Harry Carey is like the mascot for it. and Oh, sure. Well, he has a restaurant. Is that what it is? Yeah. No, no, no. It's not Harry Carey's restaurant. It's like it's like a Hall of Fame for like sports. And I don't know if it's the baseball Hall of Fame, but it's like baseball Hall of Fame, I think is in New York. Yeah, it's some sort of like baseball. museum Chicago Sports Museum.
00:24:18
Speaker
Okay, the Chicago Sports Museum. Level 7 of Water Tower Place, yeah. Yeah, it's on the top floor with Bath and Body Works and also an entrance to the top floor of Macy's. So you can take the Express elevator and it takes you an inch. Just ignore that. Keep moving, keep going. It goes so fast. it goes It like hits two floors and then it goes straight to the top.
00:24:42
Speaker
And I get in there and there's a bunch of teens, teen boys ah sitting on the floor in a circle. And the elevator? I'm like in the elevator. And I'm like, what Jesus motherfucking Christ. I've had a long day. I'm not very happy. I just need my fucking candles.
00:24:59
Speaker
and um The elevator closes and then all of a sudden they start chanting and slapping the ground and like yelling together. Oh my god. Being teen boys. It was awful. So I finally just like, I, I had a moment of insanity and I just went, can you just please stop? Oh no. And how did, did you scare them? I did. Yeah. I was going to say, cause there's one of two ways that can go.
00:25:28
Speaker
they all got so scared yeah and i was like okay 15 year old boys this grown-ass 24 year old woman near her candles if you're like what 23 24 yes yeah heels and it's like you know i look i look i'm in office core yeah um
00:25:56
Speaker
It was a moment. I think about that maybe like once a year. Yeah. And I think you won the interaction for sure. But I'm not proud of it, Katie. You Karen Donham is what you did. Yeah. Yeah, Karen Donham. Sometimes. Don't tell Charlie that. Sometimes we have to, you know? At first, I was proud of myself for standing up for myself. Yeah. Standing up in the moment. And then in retrospect, I was like, that was probably a bit much.
00:26:26
Speaker
Listen, we don't know where people are, where they've come from in their lives, like what they have been like, you know? Exactly. You could just be a 23 year old sad receptionist. Yeah. Trying to get to Bath and Body Works. Yeah. And like, it's not like you were yelling at ah at a minimum wage worker or something who didn't deserve it. No! You were yelling at somebody who was causing a scene. Yeah. And teenage boys at that.
00:26:50
Speaker
They were teenage boys that were being obnoxious in a public space. Yeah. Yeah. I'm going to give you a pass. Thank you. Thank you so much. Charlie won't. He'll hear the story and never let me live it down. Don't tell him. Well, he can't listen to this, actually. Never mind. You never told Charlie that story? No, because I knew that he would be like, Emma. Well, it's been.
00:27:18
Speaker
10 years now, so I don't think he's a... It's actually a limitation, so I'm making fun of someone for being a Karen, is I think nine years? Have you met my husband? He'll start calling me Emma Karen-Palizza. Oh no.
00:27:35
Speaker
There was one time... Oh no, wait, that was a different friend. and I was gonna say that was Charlie, but it was a different friend. There was one time that I ordered something in a restaurant. This is how much Emma takes things personally. I ordered something in a restaurant and I sounded a bit like,
00:27:49
Speaker
brash, I guess. Sure. I didn't mean to be. It just came out like everybody. I'll have this and I'll have this. And it was like a bit like very like to the point and like. ah Yeah. And so my friends, what my friend turned around and and she was just like, oh, why do you sound like such a bitch?
00:28:11
Speaker
And then you replay that moment every six hours in your head ever. Yeah. No, I totally get that. Totally yeah but get that. Yeah. Yep, yep, yep. And people wonder why I'm so nice. It's because when people tell me these things, I hold on to them.
00:28:27
Speaker
Anyways, Holidayt. Yeah, we're 28 minutes in. We haven't even begun to talk about the movie. Holidayt, I also should say long that the um the the the, I don't know if you recognize this, but Wonderland production company logo kemp comes up right at the beginning, which of course, ah famously produced two of our favorite shows, The OC and Supernatural. Yes, I did not notice that. With the lights on it that pops up, yeah.
00:28:55
Speaker
I'm like, where have I seen this before? And I googled it and it's one both the OC and supernatural. Yeah. Also yeah love hard, which we did last Christmas. Oh, love hard was great. I liked love hard more than I liked this movie. Yes. Love hard is a better movie than this. Um, yes. This movie, however, uh, as we spent 30 minutes talking about is set in Chicago. It is not owned here. Nope.
00:29:19
Speaker
It concerns Sloan, one of rom-com's favorite names for a young woman. They love it. Every third woman in a rom-com is named Sloan. They love it. Which is like, it's a good name. I like Sloan. I don't know any of these clones. Yeah, I like it. I met a child with that name the other day. Oh, yeah? Yeah, coming back on the Christmas train. Yeah. On the Christmas train. Her name was Sloan. Sure. And Jackson.
00:29:44
Speaker
And Jackson is, ah so Sloane is of course played by Emma Roberts. I think Emma Roberts plays a character named Sloane in another rom-com actually, I think. I don't doubt it. yeah And then Jackson is played by someone named Luke Bracey, who is Australian and apparently can't do an American accent because there's no reason for him to be Australian. No, um there's literally no reason. Also,
00:30:11
Speaker
ah Apparently Emma Roberts and Luke Bracey were in another rom-com together called Maybe I Do, which I have not seen. I have not seen that either. As some other actors in it, I'm i'm totally gonna watch it. yeah Yeah. He is nothing special, I would say. He doesn't really have a ton of credits aside from this and a few other things, some TV, I think some Australian soap operas and stuff. I can say, however, that the very first of Emma's Fun Facts, Emma's Fun Facts, Luke and Emma Roberts both have been in a movie.
00:30:50
Speaker
with Dwayne The Rock Johnson. Oh, okay. um I'm trying to think of what movie Emma Roberts was in with Dwayne The Rock Johnson. What was that? Empire State in 2013. I've never heard of that movie. And Luke Bracey was in GI Joe Retaliation. Oh, okay. I have not seen that. I will tell you the first GI i Joe movie is better than you think it is.
00:31:21
Speaker
Oh, really? I watched it for the first time. So it's it's made by the guy who wrote and directed The Mummy. Oh, shit. Okay. um Summers and I was listening to a podcast recently and um it blank check, which I am a huge fan of and they were talking about David Sims, who's a movie movie critic said that was was saying that the GI Joe movie is actually pretty good. And I had nothing to do one day decided to watch it and it is it's stupid, but it's fun. Yeah. it's You can tell it's written by the guy who wrote The Mummy like Oh, nice. Well, then I'm gonna put that on my list. Yeah, it's, I mean, again, it's not good, but it is not like, it's fun. It's better than Van Helsing, I'll tell you that. Better than the holiday.
00:32:04
Speaker
Yeah, it's better than holiday, yeah. Sorry, I just realized I also called this room The Holiday. Yeah, ah yeah it's it's hard not to. Yeah, OK, so Liam Hemsworth, Dwayne Johnson, and Emma Roberts in Empire State. I've never heard of this movie. 2013. Yeah, so Emma Roberts is a baby.
00:32:26
Speaker
um Yeah, never, never heard of this. This is like so before he became the biggest movie star in the world, clearly. Yeah. Yeah, so Emma Roberts, it's Christmas. um yeah The first thing she says is the fucking holidays.
Holiday Movies and Family Pressure
00:32:42
Speaker
I think that's the opening line of the movie, which is appropriate. you Love that. Because that's what this movie is about. ah Yeah, all the fucking holidays. I think that this movie is sort of a semi-adaptation of the famous Christmas song, Christmas Wrapping by The Waitresses.
00:32:59
Speaker
know Yes, I know that song. um it's It's basically the plot of Christmas Wrapping by The Waitresses where she meets somebody and then the whole year goes by and it keeps checking in on the various holidays throughout and they meet at back at the grocery store at the end and then they get together. Yeah. um Which is basically what happens in this movie.
00:33:21
Speaker
Basically what happens in this movie. But we do you have to get introduced to, like, number one, both characters. That's right. um Emma Roberts is at her parents her mom's house. No man who has ever made of her dad, I don't believe. I assume he's dead. I think her dad's dead. Yeah.
00:33:37
Speaker
And she has she has a brother, and she has a sister, and she has she has a younger brother and an older sister, and she has an aunt and a mom. And her mom is the great Frances Fisher. Her aunt is the great Kristin Chenoweth. Kristin Chenoweth. Who is so like somehow not the best part of this movie, which is so disappointing. I know. You would think that she would be. Yeah, yeah. And it it's it she just doesn't pop in this movie like they they expect her to, I think. Yeah.
00:34:06
Speaker
And then Jessica Capshaw, who is her sister, who, fun fact, is Kate Capshaw's daughter, which makes Steven Spielberg, not her dad, but her stepdad. Oh, well, good for her. Which, I mean, she was a baby when they got married, so I imagine he probably raised her. he's Yeah, he's probably like her dad. Yeah, I don't know how in the picture her father was. I didn't go that deep, but it's like the fun fact, it's like, you know, Josh Brolin's stepmom is Barbara Streisand, right?
00:34:36
Speaker
We learned that in the Practical Magic episode. Oh, that's right, because we have the whole thing about Barbara Stranson's mall under her house. Yeah. Which apparently is like something everybody on the internet talks about, but we were not aware of that at the time. Yes, it was it was new information to us. Yes, yes. And it's such a medley. Oh, my God. Can you imagine if your family was like this? It's the fucking worst.
00:34:59
Speaker
um She is beleaguered by her yeah entire family about why she's single and she's 28. Yeah, she's not even she's like in her later half of her 20s because she said she's just south of 30. Yeah. um So 28 or 29. She works from home. And I think in real life, Emma Roberts is over was over 30 when this movie came out, but that's neither here nor there.
00:35:26
Speaker
most likely yeah um and apparently the fact that she and she like got cheated on by her last serious boyfriend so she's just like not ready to look to like get back out there but everybody has a fucking opinion about it yeah it's like and i don't know i I never really spent that much time being single. And so maybe I just don't get it. And I don't think you didn't really either, right? Because you, yeah. I got married really young. Yeah, both of us got married pretty young and have been in like, I mean, have been in stable relationships through for most of our adulthood. So I guess we didn't get that. But like, I just can't imagine my mother who I should say is not like, you know, the the chillest person in the world
00:36:13
Speaker
um yeah acting like this in any world like when are you gonna meet somebody you know like it's just yeah I guess a little bit from watching because both my siblings are single and have oh I did not know that single for a lot nope they're both single they're both very very single um and I guess it is however Rebecca, I love you. You are my sister. Shout out to Rebecca who listens to the podcast religiously. Shout out to Rebecca in Canada. um But I feel like I would hear from her that she's single before I hear from my mom that she's single. OK. Because she would talk about it. OK. My brother, I feel like my mom maybe talks about it a little bit to him. I don't know, Mom, you right on in, Donna. Yeah.
00:37:09
Speaker
Yeah, let us know. Let us know your daughter's opinion on this. Yeah. And you're the middle also, correct? Yes, I am the middle and the only married child. Yeah, I am the youngest, but my sisters are significantly older than me and were married before I was an adult, so. Yes.
00:37:28
Speaker
And also both, I mean, my sister, Laura, you know, was date date as a mayor in her high school sweetheart. Like they were dating when I was born. Jesus. And then Angela also got married at like maybe twenty five or twenty six. Yeah. Through and had been together with him for four years at that point. So, yeah.
00:37:51
Speaker
Not really an issue in our family, I guess, I don't know. Yeah. I guess it's like a little bit more of a conversation in my household. I just don't listen to it because I'm the married one. So I'm like, yeah I'm out. Yeah.
00:38:02
Speaker
um Well, I mean, the i ah i mean you and you also get you get the constant from, I mean, from my my mom, at least, I don't know about you, but like, when are you gonna have kids? Like, when am I gonna be- When are you gonna have kids? Yeah. I actually, I saw a very interesting article the other day, which was um the, I think it was in like the New York Times, and it's the obituary for grandparents who will never become grandparents. Oh, I know. Yeah, I saw that. Go fuck yourself. Yeah. Right? Come on.
00:38:29
Speaker
But I mean, like, it's true. It's just sort of like, well, maybe if, you know, the world wasn't fucked and everything wasn't so expensive, it'd be a little bit more realistic to have kids. Maybe if we believed the world would be around for 50 more years, which I don't think it's a good chance. I don't think it will be. Yeah. And like, you know, on on our end, they're like,
00:38:49
Speaker
Things are more complicated, obviously. Yeah. It may not even be around in four more years. I did tell my mom I was crying after the election and um I was like, well, mom. Who wasn't crying after the election? I know. Who wasn't? Well, some people weren't. um The majority of America, apparently. but Apparently so. and um But so like I was crying to my mom. We were crying together.
00:39:15
Speaker
And I was like, you know, mom, I wanted to be a mom one day. And now I don't want to have kids. And she's like, I completely understand. Why would you want to bring kids into this hellscape? Wow. Yeah. Good for her. Which um I think she'll probably take that back or around the holidays. Yeah. Chicks do get crazy around the holidays, as Jackson in this movie says. Just one of those things where I'm like, a woman wrote this? Yeah, right.
00:39:44
Speaker
I mean, I get what they're doing, but like it's not cute or charming. right now This guy sucks. Yeah, because also they like set him up with like the first the first girl that we see Jackson with. He was going to her house in Evanston to have Christmas with her family. We don't know. that they We assume that there are a couple from this yeah from this from the way from this setup. He is at this woman's house. His parents are dressed in matching Christmas sweaters. They've got him in one.
00:40:12
Speaker
and there he's doing Christmas with her family. And then and we find out that they are not a they're not even a couple. like He basically just met this girl and she's probably like- Yeah, they hooked up. Yeah, yeah they they hooked up maybe like once and then the second time was in her childhood bedroom. Yes, yes, which is terrifying and full of dolls and stuffed animals. and like Listen, i I've got a few stuffed animals. um Yeah.
00:40:39
Speaker
but do they all stare at you? And they're not in the bedroom. stuffed animals We have no stuffed animals in the bedroom. we have i was at I was actually at somebody's house the other day and they had like a net up in the corner of their ceiling. It was actually above their TV that had all but all their squishmallows and stuff. And I'm like, oh, we should totally do that. It would free up so much seating space in the living room. And you say, hey, I like that. And they were like, yeah, that's for my two-year-old.
00:41:08
Speaker
No, because they were like 24. And they had a lot of squishmallows. Because I was there watching anime with them on Saturday night. Live your life. Shout out, Miles DeMarco. Yes. I probably shouldn't have said his last name, but it's just one of those names where it's like, you gotta say the first and last name. You gotta say the first and last name. Yeah. Yeah.
00:41:36
Speaker
Anyway, my God, we do not want to talk about this movie, do we? I think that that's it. I think that that's from the depths of our soul. Here's the thing, guys. If you've seen this movie, the first watch, you're like, yeah, this is fine. It's whatever you could like. This is like a movie you could put on in the background while bacon cooked.
00:41:52
Speaker
That's like Netflix's thing. Like Netflix, it's almost like it's on purpose. Like this is a background movie. Like how much did this fucking movie cost? I just closed my tab. A lot of money. Like I don't understand um how these things get made like this because um this is I mean, I guess that's the point. Like this is a movie. The budget isn't listed here. I'm going to have to go to IMDB, I think.
00:42:17
Speaker
um
00:42:20
Speaker
It's not theatrical, so it's not it's it's expected that you're going to watch this in the background, that you're gonna be doing something, maybe holiday related, while this plays. And so like if you're on your phone or or lose focus for a second, you can come back and it's right back there, which I don't think that's good for the culture, honestly, or especially not art.
00:42:40
Speaker
Oh my God, no. It's just sort of like, and that's why it's so hard to watch this movie and stay focused. It's because this movie just goes on and on and on and on. It's an hour 44. Yeah. It's Netflix. They have no budget. They don't show the budget and they don't show, you know, because it didn't make any money because it wasn't released theatrically.
Character Highlights and Critiques
00:43:01
Speaker
But yeah here's the central, like, but oh, also I want us to shout out Cynthia Wu. I think it's pronounced Cynthia, C-Y-N-T-H-Y. Oh, is that the the fiance? Yeah. um She's great. She's on my favorite TV show, For All Mankind. Oh! One of the major characters on there. She's great. I love her. And she has, ah she's the she's the character who, the minor character who pops, who they expected to be considered to channel with, but she's the one who is does that. But it's her. Great, yeah.
00:43:28
Speaker
Yeah, she's freaking great. She's hilarious. She, every single scene that she does, she basically plays the polar opposite of Emma Roberts, which is like this sort of like, I am very like, you know, prim and I'm getting married. I'm very demure.
00:43:43
Speaker
yeah Very cutesy. Yeah, and um and also then there's ah manni manishsh mannet Manish Dayal, who plays Farooq, who also is on the television show that I love very much. Halton Catchfire, he was in the third season of that show. I thought you were gonna say The Resident, because that's what he's on right now. Oh, I've never seen The Resident. And I was like, really, Katie, The Resident? I know that Matt Zukri is the resident on The Resident, and that's the the end of my knowledge on that.
00:44:19
Speaker
he yeah He played Ryan in the third season of Halt and Catch Fire, and everybody should watch that show because it's great. Katie loves Halt and Catch Fire. I do. it It can't be the first time I've talked about it on this show. It is absolutely not. I know for a fact it is. um It's a bisexual dream. Lee Pace and Mackenzie Davis. like be my heart She's 5'11". He's 6'5". These things are important to tall girls. Hashtag tall girl dreams. Yeah. I get it.
00:44:49
Speaker
I'm on the lower end of the tall girl spectrum, but I'm still on it. Yeah, you are. Yeah, thank you. So basically the whole concept of this movie is that... Which is stupid. The whole kind the problem with the movie is the whole concept. That's the thing. Yeah. Oh, it's that...
00:45:09
Speaker
Around the holidays, things for single people get a little stressful. So you end up going on dates you don't want to go on. So why not just have one dude who's like a friend and go to all the holidays with your friends, but you call him a holiday date. Which makes sense for New Year's and Valentine's Day and Christmas maybe. Yes. Maybe Christmas. Christmas is a stretch on that. New Year's. Thanksgiving also. and Yeah, less than Christmas even. But New Year's and Valentine's Day are the date holidays. Like those are the only two holidays really where it's expected that you have a date. Yes, exactly. Because somebody at midnight in New Year's and you go out to dinner on Valentine's Day with somebody and if you don't do that it's considered sad in modern culture, which is bullshit obviously and you can do whatever you want on those holidays.
00:46:03
Speaker
But in this parallel universe, ah ah Chicago, that we live in, in this movie, every holiday requires a date. And actually, you know what, I will say, maybe, maybe in Chicago, St. Patrick's Day.
00:46:20
Speaker
Yeah. I was going to say St. Patrick's Day maybe. St. Patrick's Day in Chicago is a holy day. It is. And and probably Boston. And I'm sure Boston and New York and you know other big cities. St. Patrick's Day is a drinking holiday. Yes. Yeah. It's insanity and a nightmare to go out on the streets of Chicago on St. Patrick's Day. I haven't been in a loop on St. Patrick's Day in eight years easily, yeah. Smart. Don't go to the Loop, don't go to Boys Town, don't go to Wrigleyville. Wrigleyville, yeah. And unfortunately, I lived around two of those neighborhoods. Sure did, yeah. It was a nightmare trying to go to Whole Foods.
00:47:00
Speaker
ah no Um, yeah so what happens is, uh, they both have a terrible Christmas. Um, yeah. Um, Jackson has gone to this, this hookups house for Christmas and she's apparently told her parents that they're in a very serious relationship and they are not. He doesn't get her anything for Christmas because yeah she's explicitly told him we're not doing presents and she gives him khakis, which he is a spirit and pronounces them car keys. Car keys. Yeah. Which is funny.
00:47:31
Speaker
um And cockies. Cockies. Cockies. Yeah. It's like, you know that thing where like, if you say, um say ah ah beer can in an English. Oh yeah, beer can. It's bacon in. ja makeican accent Yeah. Beer ken be can. Beer can. Beer can. Beer can.
00:47:52
Speaker
Yeah. Um, but yeah. And, and he realizes that this, and then she gets really upset with him because he didn't get her anything. And it's just like, girl. Yeah. And then she says one of the timeless phrases from this movie, you can come in my mouth, but won't get me a Christmas present.
00:48:16
Speaker
Right? which Who hasn't been there, really? Right. I mean, if you can come in my house, you can certainly figure out what to get me for Christmas. Yeah. Like, you know, I'm a trinket of some kind. Like, it doesn't have to be big. It doesn't have to be big. It could be a bracelet. It could be a book. It could be it could be anything. Just the idea that you thought about me. Right. Yeah. Yeah, exactly. Yeah.
00:48:50
Speaker
And also at and at Emma Roberts' Christmas at Sloan's Christmas, everyone's giving her shit for being single. They give her um pajamas, which I assume she probably got, she got other presents. Like that was what her sister got her, was the pajamas. that's what her yeah Pajamas that are like three sizes too big for her. Which is obviously a re-gift.
00:49:11
Speaker
yeah for sure because so the next day or perhaps two days later they're both at the mall a lot of this movie takes place in the mall which again is a weird thing the movie came out in 2020 y'all and it's like if you've been to chicago go you'd know not everything takes place in the mall yeah for sure for sure i mean i don't know where tiffany paulson is from but nobody goes to the mall anymore like listen like i love malls i'm a mall girl oh yeah and i Every Christmas, I have a plan. We go to the Woodfield Mall and spend the whole day there and do all our Christmas shopping in one day, mostly for nostalgia reasons. Yeah, because it's nice. Yeah. I love that. I love a mall. I grew up in a mall. I spent most of my high school in the mall because you could walk from the high school to the mall to my house all within distance. Yeah. um None of that is here or there. But a lot of this maybe takes place in the fictional Lakeview Mall.
00:50:07
Speaker
And they're both there in the in the return aisle of some clothing store and they have a meet uncute where they are both trying to return these things. He's trying to return his cockies and she's trying to return her pajamas and she's not they're not getting shit for any of them. They tell her yeah these these pajamas were on sale for $4.99 so I can give you $4.99.
00:50:33
Speaker
yeah ah And like, has that ever happened to you? Have you ever tried to return something and realized that somebody spent like $5 on you for something? I have. Oh, you have? Oh, yeah. Yeah. When I was in, I think it was in college or something. Like and somebody got me something that I had, that I already, that I already had. I think it was like, I don't remember what it was, but it was, yeah, it was like $4 and I went to return, tried to return it. They're like, Oh, this was $4. I'm like $4.
00:50:59
Speaker
come on Is that what I'm worth to you? Like I know that it's a thought that counts, but I feel like $4 is the thought that's, that's, that's part of that. You know, like it seems like we don't care what you get us as a gift. As long as you've thought about us, like at least make it $15 or more. Yeah. If you're going to come in my mouth, you can spend more than $4 on the Christmas present. You could spend $40 on me. Yeah. That sounds about right. That's what he offered. forty dollars Yeah.
00:51:32
Speaker
Um, because yeah, he says, well, I've got $40. She goes, what am I a prostitute? She goes, I'll take 80. That's cute. right Funny moments in this movie. However, I feel like the moments that the movie thinks are funny are not nearly as funny as the movie thinks they are. Yeah. And the things that are dogg are kind of smaller. Yeah.
00:51:52
Speaker
like the um debt Dirty Dancing sequence? um That I didn't mind. I didn't mind that so much. um i think I thought that was kind of cute, if not like, I don't think it was bunny necessarily, but it was cute. Yeah. Oh, when her tits fall out. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Yeah.
00:52:09
Speaker
um The, no, the whole, like, them in the hospital high when his fingers get off me, like, I don't think that's funny at all. Yeah, yeah, yeah. And also, they wouldn't be able to smoke in a hospital. Absolutely not, yeah. Someone would catch that so fast. Yeah, yeah. So they have a conversation in the mall and where she talks about, Kristen Chenoweth, her aunt, has a holiday.
00:52:38
Speaker
ah just a random person that she brings to all these events like so at Christmas she had a mall Santa that she brought and they see the mall Santa and he's waving at her and that's when she explains it to him and he says well I've got tickets to this fancy New Year's Eve party and I need a holiday why don't you come with me it'll just be for this thing and like we don't have to there doesn't to be pressure for the relationship and here's the thing about that I can understand if you need, like listen, I read a lot of fake dating, like fake romance, I mean, fake dating ro rom coms, books especially, it's my favorite genre, the fake yeah the the fake dating thing. I get there are many situations in fictional books and movies where one has to have a fake relationship, you're going to a wedding, you're going to like some holiday thing where it's just gonna be easier if you have a fake boyfriend, fake girlfriend, fake
00:53:30
Speaker
non-binary fringe relationship situation. Fake person. Yes, I will buy that. like i I don't know anybody it's ever happened to in real life, but... i will I will buy it as a premise. This, they're not lying. They're not pretending to be in a relationship. They're telling you. They're out in the open about it. Yeah. so i don't So what are they gaining exactly? And also, New Year's, they're alone. like Yeah. And he says, I just want to relax and and have a drink and go to this party on my own. And it'd be nice to have you
Cultural Comparisons and Charm
00:54:05
Speaker
there.
00:54:05
Speaker
um like Why? Yeah, why? so Because you don't know each other. You don't know each other and you're not trying to impress anyone because like yeah they're both hot. I understand if like they're trying to like show off to somebody, try to make somebody jealous, try to yeah like get her sister to leave her alone about having a relationship, but this holiday thing doesn't accomplish any of those goals. Yeah, because everyone knows what it is. And it gets brought up so many times that they're just like,
00:54:35
Speaker
They say the word holiday in this movie like 50 times. It's so annoying. It's my holiday. And it's just like... Just like, if they made one tiny change to the script, just one tiny change, if it was a where it would make sense. It would be way better. Yeah, because she's trying to get her family to leave her alone for the relationship. He's trying to like get a promotion at work and having like an attractive partner is going to help him like network with people at work. like I can write that. Is that?
00:55:05
Speaker
you know Is that what his deal is? No, no, that would make- Oh, okay. I was like, I missed that whole storyline. No, his deal is nothing. He has no reason. His parents are in Australia. He has no reason to need a holiday whatsoever. I mean, I guess- He works at a top golf. Yeah, he's a golf pro, which I don't know what that is. um It's somebody who teaches people how to play golf, is that? It looks like he works at a top golf.
00:55:32
Speaker
I don't you keep saying that like I know what that means. Like, you know, a top golf. OK, no, I don't. I don't know what a top golf is. It's like it's like, um, uh, it's a place that you can go and you can hit balls against a green screen. I saw them do that. Yeah. Yes. And it's like indoor and indoor golf course that you can do with like golf and pro.
00:56:03
Speaker
Let me see if there's a better way to describe Topgolf. Okay, yeah, yeah. A golf pro is an expert in golf who works in the game in various ways, including teaching, managing courses, and promoting the sport. I know that one of my friends, Erin, I don't know if Erin listens to this show. Hi, Erin, if you do. Hi, Erin. I think she still does stand up, but she doesn't live in Chicago anymore, so I don't see it. um And she had this whole like bit about her ex-boyfriend was a golf pro.
00:56:30
Speaker
Um, so that's the only reason I know that phrase. Okay. I was, I just assumed that he worked at a top golf, which well they ask god that he says that he's a golf pro in the movie. Yeah. oh Well, a top golf is a premier entertainment venue featuring fun golf games for all skill levels, a full service bar and restaurant. Okay.
00:56:54
Speaker
So it's like, it's like a- I presume they would have golf pros who work there. Yeah, I don't know. Yeah. Yeah. He works at Topgolf. um ah But yeah, he has no reason. No. Other reason. I guess the assumption is that he's into her from the beginning and he wants to date her and has come up with this convoluted thing to, one might say cockamamie scheme. and Yeah.
00:57:18
Speaker
two but to to get her to to spend time with her. But we don't see any evidence of that until the end. And in fact, the very beginning, he says that she's not attractive. Exactly. And then she holds on to that like any woman would. Anybody would. Yeah. If somebody ever said to me that you're not attractive, I would never forget that for the rest of my life. Exactly. And I'd be like, well, obviously, they don't want to fuck me because they think I'm ugly.
00:57:42
Speaker
Yeah, yeah. Yeah. Which, I mean like Robert says a lot of things, but she's not unattractive. Let's be real. No, she's gorgeous. Yeah. She has the Robert's lips. Yeah. Yeah. I do know that. Neither do I. There have been some moments in my life where I'm like, oh my God, should I get like a top lip filler? Oh my gosh, me too. I know. Right? Because I'm just like, my bottom lip is good. This is here, no doubt. This is exactly why we cannot talk about this film. We would much rather talk about lip filler. I'm actually just thinking, we do have similar lips, don't we? We both have a normal bottom lip. We do. Yeah, a normal bottom and then a little thin one. Oh my God, should we get filler together? I think it's both too. I think you do. Yeah. Yeah, we do. We could be, we could look like we're related because we have similar mouths. It'd be like the mouth came from our mother. Sure. Yeah. So anyways, long story short, they become a holiday and then they go on dates for some of the most insane holidays. They hit every, they do, there's basically 12 scenes in this movie or 13 because they do Christmas twist. There's basically 13 scenes in this movie and they do, they hit every holiday.
00:58:53
Speaker
They do Christmas. Every single one. New Year's, Valentine's Day, St. Patrick's Day, Mother's Day. Mother's Day. Why does he need to come with you to have lunch with your mom in the park? What the fuck is that? So that she doesn't ask about her relationship status. She does because she knows about it. She still gives her shit. It accomplishes nothing. Exactly. And then the most problematic holiday of them all.
00:59:20
Speaker
Cinco de Mayo. Cinco... Yeah, I mean, which people like white people do go to Mexican restaurants and it en masse and on Cinco de Mayo for sure. They tried to make it out like there's this whole like routine for Cinco de Mayo that you go to a Mexican restaurant and you wear a sombrero and anytime someone says shots, you just take a shot of tequila. There's a lot of drinking um holidays in this movie, which is accurate for Chicago, I will say. Exactly. Chicago's a big drinking setting. There's no malort in the movie, however, and I found that to be like Just basic research on Chicago should give you, like, Malort Milwaukee's best, you know? like Exactly. Like, at least put one poster in the background, just like yeah one. Yeah, you can have, like, a couple lines about Malort. Come on. Yeah, be like, I'll do a Malort shot. I'm like, uh, St. Patrick's Day. Malort is a disgusting, anise-flavored liqueur, ah very popular yeah in Chicago, mostly to shock tourists.
01:00:21
Speaker
Yes. However, my mother-in-law likes the taste. Well, she's from England. Yes. She likes it. She thinks it's quite nice. yeah they they i don't ah You don't want to get into like what British people eat and drink. um They put blood in sausage and pudding there. as they Yeah,
01:00:48
Speaker
What's the next one? Is the next one the wedding? No. Fourth of July. Fourth of July. And that's where Luke gets his, or sorry, what's his name? Jackson. Jackson. Gets his finger blown off because they're playing with fireworks. Which again is very relatable and accurate. Like many, many times have I been at some Fourth of July celebration where a bunch of idiot boys are blowing things up. Yup. Yup, yup, yup.
01:01:16
Speaker
cut Yep, yep. And then, okay, so we get fourth. There's a subplot, there's a couple of subplots. oh yeah um There's Farooq, who's played by Manish Dayal, who is the hottest per the hottest man in this movie, I think. Do you think Luke Bracey is hotter? i Honestly, I think they're on par. Yeah, there's also- I mean, I'd take either. Well, sure. I mean, it's not like I would you know kick him out of bed for eating crackers or anything, but like, right I don't know. He's not really doing it for me.
01:01:45
Speaker
So what? Never heard that expression? I wouldn't kick him out of bed reading crackers. yeah
01:01:53
Speaker
I'm from the South, y'all. I got lots of phrases. Have I told you what my grandmother used to say when someone sneezed? What? Scat there, cat. Get your tail out of my gravy bowl. Oh my god. Instead of, God bless you, just for normal people's sake.
01:02:15
Speaker
um Yes, so Farooq is a doctor um who apparently works at every hospital and clinic in Chicagoland. And yep he is, ah her mom met him somehow and she, her mom is trying to hook Farooq up with Sloan. And honestly, like, he seems like a great guy. He's a doctor. He seems like he has his life together. He's very attractive. And
01:02:43
Speaker
She does attempt to, at one point, that there's like you know the third act part of every rom-com where they they sleep together on ah Halloween, or rather November 1st, after she shits her pants. Yep. Because she sure accidentally gave her laxatives. Yes, yes. Which is this weird little scene in this movie. Like, there's this weird, like, shut up, a towel-esque, like, comedy beat thing they go to. The rest of the movie isn't like that. I don't know why. i Yeah.
01:03:10
Speaker
Listen, and plenty of girls shit their pants. I understand that. It happens. It happens, especially when you are fed laxatives. In a corset. In a corset. Yeah. Yeah. Goodbye. And then he bathes her. And then he bathes her. Yes, and that's very sweet. I get what they're trying to do. They're they're having that like like edgy thing turn into the sweet thing, which I appreciate on like yeah like a script level.
01:03:36
Speaker
Yeah. But I don't know. And I would not want a guy to bathe me after I shit myself. Especially a guy that you don't really know that well. like Exactly. You've hung out with him like six times over the course of 10 months. Yeah. But I mean, like she does make a really she does have a really good line as she's like curling into bed, um which is she's just like, well, you know, I'm glad that I'll just now be an antidote that you can tell um yeah at future parties and stuff like that. And then he says, well, I'm not going to tell anyone.
01:04:06
Speaker
Um, which is very sweet. Um, because like that would honestly be my first thought of like, well, I'm just going to be that girl from the funny story you tell. Yeah. There's this cliche, you know, in screenwriting, which I'm sure we've talked about on this podcast before there is this book called save the cat that came out in the nineties, which became like this huge screenwriting.
01:04:24
Speaker
like Touchstone and it's it's very stupid and it's very basic. But I mean, a lot of movies a lot of movies do it. And, um you know, I guess that's his thing. That's the first thing that he does that like shows he's a good guy really. And that's like two thirds the way through the movie. I was gonna say it's like over the halfway mark.
01:04:42
Speaker
Yeah, she, however, does have a very specific save the cat move um moment in the in the first act at New Year's, where she's wearing this oh yeah great dress, makes her tits look great, which is what everyone says in the movie. And, you know, they're right. um yeah As as you know one of our actresses of ah smaller boobage, we appreciate. We love that. that. we that um And she is in the bathroom and this girl who they've already discussed, they think is getting proposed to that night has spilled wine all over her white dress and she needs and she needs someone to switch dresses with her. And Emma Roberts does that because she's a nice yeah person. thats yeah It's very kind of rote. And it does it does pay off because the dress doesn't fit her that well and it rips off when they do the dirty dancing things. Yeah. And then everyone sees her tits and then they have like a whole moment to like,
01:05:38
Speaker
Be like, ah! The whole thing. I mean, here's the thing. If some man I barely knew tried to do the Dirty Dancing thing to me, I feel like it's my fault if he drops me, you know?
01:05:51
Speaker
But what if he was the one that was bad at it? Well, I mean, like, it's out and out. And my dress popped open. if If your dress pops open while someone is doing Dirty Dancing and the guy drops you, that's your fault, you know? like i don't know
01:06:10
Speaker
You heard it here first.
01:06:16
Speaker
Now I take it back. Yeah. So then it's, there's a wedding. There's a whole thing. So Farooq ends up like being a B plot romance with Kristen Chenoweth, who's like 25 years older than him. Um, so that's cute. And then like, she, big yeah, she's this like Chicago party aunt who is constantly going through these like ridiculous men at all of these holidays, yeah and then she ends up with a nice doctor boy because Emma Roberts loves the mid-Australian man.
01:06:53
Speaker
And then they end up getting married. It's very sweet, because there's this that whole like post sequence with all the pictures, so you find out what happens with all the characters. Yeah, and Dan Lauria gets with the mom. Yeah, so there's Thanksgiving, like and you know they like come apart, and they get back together. and it's We don't need to get into the details. Katie's really passionate. I will say, so one of the, I do have to mention in Emma's Fun Fact. So Emma's Fun Facts, Emma's Fun Facts. So there's a scene that sort of broke the internet because everyone was convinced that this was one thing when it was in fact not. So in the scene when they're in the grocery store and Jackson and Sloan are getting into it and
01:07:36
Speaker
um He says, you know, even if Ryan Gosling were to come in here in the frozen aisle, you would just ignore him. um And Sloan says Ryan Gosling would never do his own shopping. ah They had someone walk in yeah behind her.
01:07:54
Speaker
who kind of looks, it's not Ryan Gosling, but the internet for a hot second thought that it was. It it was just um Jackson Standen who kind of looks like Ryan Gosling. So like if you squint, um but the internet thought for a hot second that it was Ryan Gosling. That's silly. Yeah, it's very silly.
Relatable Moments and Confusions
01:08:20
Speaker
says to her, which um ah there's one thing specifically that it's a literal exchange I've had with my mom, which I think maybe everyone has had with their mom, where she's on FaceTime with her and her mom goes, she's much, she's showing her to someone else. She goes, she's much prettier with makeup. And her mom, she goes, I'm wearing makeup. I've had that exact exchange with my mom.
01:08:42
Speaker
She's like, how about you put on some makeup? I'm like, I'm wearing makeup. I'm wearing it. Jeez, mom. Her brother looks like a young Ethan Hawke. He does. What is this? Oh, another thing. She goes, did you just compare having sex with me to eating slugs?
01:09:01
Speaker
toing my mom um What time is it? It's sexy time, which is the the the fuck-ass song that they play at the wedding for them what dirt when they're dancing. Like I- Oh yeah. First of all, they have the, the most the this is Cynthia Wu's wedding to Emma Roberts' brother where they have the father-daughter dance to I'll Make Love To You by Boyz II Men, which is- Yes!
01:09:31
Speaker
Ridiculous. Very funny. And then they change it to a song where everybody's dancing where Farooq and Emma Roberts are dancing together and Kristen Chenoweth and um Luke Bracey are dancing together, but they're into the other ones that are making eyes at each other. And the song that they're singing is, what time is it? It's sexy time. What time is it? It's sexy time. I'm like, what the fuck are we listening to? I didn't even catch that. Ridiculous.
01:09:57
Speaker
um There's the bit. ah There's the bit where there's both Cynthia Wu and Emma Roberts' brother are supposed to be Cleopatra and Mark Antony. She dresses like Mark Anthony, which I laughed. I'm not proud of it. I thought that was very funny. That was very funny. And then she has the great line afterwards where she just... Because he's like, you know, the Latin singer is married to J.Lo. And she goes, they're not even together anymore. She's had like two different husbands since this movie came out. I know.
01:10:29
Speaker
so J.Lo, you're a girl. She's gonna get in time. like I don't know. i'm i'm Eventually. I'm in J.Lo's corner. Yeah. and And yeah,
Ratings and Recommendations
01:10:40
Speaker
that's it. That's holiday. Yeah, that's holiday. That's fine. It is what it is. It was fine. And it's Christmas again, and they get back together, because I don't know, whatever. Yeah, things happen. He says that he lied when he said she wasn't attractive, because he didn't want to like her to think that he had a crush on her or something. like Yeah.
01:10:58
Speaker
Whatever, this movie's fine. If you've seen it, you know it's fine. yeah If you're planning on seeing it, maybe have some sort of activity that you can be doing while while watching it. um You know, crafting, coloring, looking, shopping on your phone. um We have not talked about what Charlie thought of this movie. Yep, I'm getting to it.
01:11:23
Speaker
Charlie's Corner. Charlie thought this movie was, it he said, it was a good film. What really? Ellipses. Uh-huh. Much better than the princess bride. He's just trying to hurt the both of us at this point. um Seems cruel. It's a cruel thing to say. It's a cruel thing to say. Yeah.
01:11:52
Speaker
Jesus Christ, Charles.
01:11:57
Speaker
Charles, Katie's gonna kill you. I hate that. um That's ridiculous. It's just a ridiculous thing to say. And it's a ridiculous thing to say. But um, you know, we both love the Princess Bride and this movie was fine. Let me tell you about what we're gonna do next week.
Upcoming Rom-Coms and Podcast Plans
01:12:12
Speaker
There's no accounting for taste. Go ahead. So next week, I'm on that Netflix rom com train. Hell yeah.
01:12:20
Speaker
i This movie doesn't come out until tomorrow when we are recording. ah So it's gonna be brand brand new 2024. I believe, let me get the title correct. It is called The Merry Gentlemen. The Merry Gentlemen? What is this? I have no idea.
01:12:39
Speaker
Really? It's the next Netflix movie. And the premise is to save her parents small town performing review, a former big city dancer decides to stage an all male Christmas themed review. Oh, oh the mayor oary hold on the Merry Gentlemen, plural, not the Merry Gentlemen singular, a movie with Michael Keaton from 2008.
01:13:01
Speaker
but Oh, sorry. Important. Britt Robertson, who we just talked about. Oh, Chad Michael. but more Okay. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. cha michael Yeah. Yeah. Yep. It's the stripper Christmas one. No. Yes. Absolutely. What do we think the chances are there's hog in it? Oh, because it's a Netflix one. What's it rated? PG.
01:13:22
Speaker
No! No hog. Boo! Well, I guess we'll just have to draw our own to stick on the TVs. I mean, there's no hog in Magic Mike either, right? I don't think there is. I've never seen Magic Mike. Oh my god, Magic Mike is delightful. All three of them, honestly, are great.
01:13:41
Speaker
I know it's on my list. It's on my list. I think the second one is probably my favorite. um The thing about Magic Mike is the like the the like romance plot is really hampered by the fact that the girl they cast as like his love interest in the movie has the charisma of a black hole.
01:14:00
Speaker
um and Or just rather or rather is a charisma black hole, I guess I should say. And nothing can escape the the depths of her ah just completely blank expression and zero personality. so Well, that means we'll have to do this for the pod. Despite her, that's ah it's a great movie. okay I love all three Magic Mike movies, yeah. We'll have to save it for 2025. I don't think there's any hog in it at all, come to think of it.
01:14:30
Speaker
yeah Well, there's lots of stay tuned guys yeah yeah yeah Yeah, stay tuned. We'll see if the merry gentleman has hog. I mean Chad Michael Murray keeping it tight like look at that Yeah, and he looks even hotter with the floppy hair. I'm very excited. Yeah, for sure Yeah, you can tell I was a 90s kid. I'm into floppy hair. Oh, yeah, a hundred percent.
Closing Thoughts and Farewell
01:14:52
Speaker
Yeah. Yeah. All right, shall we outro? I think it's you this time Yeah. Thank you for listening to Go Get Your Girl. If you like us, tell your friends
01:15:31
Speaker
asking it to love us. Good night. Good night.