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EPISODE 129: GRAVEYARDS ARE TERRIFYING!
1.1k Plays2 months ago
The one place where we know we’ll end up eventually: the graveyard! Listen in as the boys explore some of their favorite graveyards and cemeteries!
HORROR IN THE MOVIES
RETURN OF THE LIVING DEAD and THE GRAVEDANCERS will have you calling to pre-plan your funeral.
WHATCHA BEEN WATCHIN’, BITCH?!
Listen in to hear what we’ve been watchin’... bitch!
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Transcript
Podcast Introduction
00:00:00
Speaker
Fry Gay the 13th Horror Podcast is a proud, independent podcast. To learn more about the show, visit frygay13.com.
Haunting Tales and Epitaphs
00:00:11
Speaker
Ah, it's just so peaceful in the Suffy Bummer's Memorial Cemetery at night. I can't believe it's been in Lesbegay Falls for over 69 years. Yes, and they say that it's haunted. And if you listen very closely, you can hear them reading, fulfilled.
00:00:31
Speaker
um Is there a place in our quaint village that isn't haunted? Anyway, I really do love reading like the creative epitaphs. Do people even do that anymore? I mean, look, Butch Daddy. Here lays Butch. We planted him raw. He was quick but on the trigger, but slow on the draw.
Episode 129 Introduction: Graveyards
00:00:51
Speaker
And this one, here lies the body of Jonathan Ground, who was lost at Coachella and never found. This one just says bottom.
00:01:01
Speaker
Uh, yes, I remember him fondly. It's episode 129, graveyards are terrifying.
00:01:11
Speaker
I am the writing on the wall, the whisper in the
00:01:30
Speaker
We are in real life. Doubtters, the doomsters, the gloomsters, they are going to get it wrong. Hoorah, the memories. Where are you gonna go? Where are you gonna run? Where are you gonna hide? Nowhere. Because there's no one like you left. What do we want? Justice! When do we want it? Now! Let's go! What are you waiting for, huh?
Haunted Cemeteries and Hosts Introduction
00:02:03
Speaker
you to know that the movement we started is only just beginning sometimes is but We arrive in the small town of South Rockwood. um With the exception of a few trains, the town is quiet. But inside the cemetery, there is restlessness.
00:02:23
Speaker
It's a spot members of Spirit World Paranormal Investigations has visited many times because it's infamously known to be haunted. There was a young girl that was chained to a tree over there and had passed away.
00:02:37
Speaker
You know, it's one of the folklorists that's been going around for many years that we had heard here. Welcome to Fraggy the Thirteenth Horror
Fascination with Graveyards
00:02:44
Speaker
Podcast. My name is Andrew. And my name is Matthew Ryan. And if this is your first time that Matty has never said that before, but it's also the podcast where we talk about horror in real life and horror in the movies.
00:03:00
Speaker
Today, we are talking all about graveyards. Listen, all of us will end up one day, you know? No, hopefully not, because I do not want to be buried, but that's fine. Fair enough, fair enough.
00:03:15
Speaker
Um, no, so, you know, we're getting into kind of the fall weather in here in Chicago, it literally dropped 20 degrees. Thank glass you. guys Jesus. Uh, and so we're starting to feel a little spooky. We're starting to feel a little bit. not tea with ourselves and our spooky little selves. So you know what? We want to do some fun episodes just all about spooky stuff. And you know what? Ever since I think both of us were kids, we've been fascinated by graveyards. Yes, very much so. And Andrew, did you know, do you know what the difference between a cemetery and a graveyard is?
00:03:53
Speaker
Ooh, actually I do not. This is a really simple way to think about it. Graveyards are at churches and and everything else is a cemetery. That's the only difference. So like if you think about like it's like your classic like kind of old school church, it's got a little cemetery outside, maybe even a column barium, if you know what that is, that's where they, um, it's like a little building or like a little wall where they, where they put people's ashes in there. So like you get, you get cremated and then you just put them in the wall kind of thing.
00:04:22
Speaker
Um, that is what the difference is. So, um, not a huge difference. I mean, look, you're still putting people on the ground if that's what you want to do or putting ashes into a thing. Um, but that is the major difference. That's why we're calling this graveyard or terrifying because frankly, graveyard is just a the The word is just more fun. You know what I mean? Like it says grave and yard in it. um And you know, this is it's a really fun one because Andrew, like you said, um we are really into graveyards and cemeteries. And if if you go way, way back in our in
Exploring Favorite Graveyards
00:04:54
Speaker
our episodes, you'll find um a what do we call those, Andrew? um The interviews we call horror hookups, horror hookups. We have a horror hookup with ah with ah what was it called? The cemetery club.
00:05:06
Speaker
And that was with Sasha and with Sheldon from from the UK. And ah Sheldon still does it. and I know that Sasha actually just wrote a book that that is coming out very soon about about queer histories. I think it's out. It's called Queer as Folklore. That's it, Queer as Folklore.
00:05:23
Speaker
and Sheldon um still runs a cemetery club and basically what it is is Sheldon is a historian and a storyteller and he would go around to graveyards and cemeteries looking for sort of like the lost stories of the people that are buried there and so god that must have been like back in like 2019 Maybe Andrew something like that definitely before the pandemic yeah yeah long long time ago is really cool episode go back and listen to that. um but you know I remember seeing that online and going andrew we gotta get these guys on the show and so we did. And the only reason why i saw it online is because i'm kind of obsessed with cemeteries and graveyards and i just thought it was really really cool.
00:06:00
Speaker
Um, and so like, I think, um, you know, maybe it sounds a little bit morbid to say it, but it's a horror podcast. So whatever, like I've had, you know, it does I just have a gigantic family. I've got a lot of cousins. I have a lot of siblings. I've got a lot of, you know, just people. And so like, you know, death has never been too far away from my family because just obviously we all are going to die one day. And so like, I've spent a good deal of time in cemeteries and like, just, you know, either going to a funeral or visiting relatives or, you know, you name it.
00:06:30
Speaker
It's a thing that I was doing since I was a very very small child so I think I've always kind of felt comfortable there because it was. It was present in my life very early on and they are fascinating and you know I'm i'm really glad that we had Sheldon on the show way way back when.
00:06:46
Speaker
because it's a really it's a really interesting way to think about them. I think people can be really scared of cemeteries or they can be really freaked out by them, but if you start to look at them as a collection of stories, and you know if you do start to go in and read some of the epitaphs and see how people are listed,
00:07:04
Speaker
And, you know, especially like back in the day when like a headstone wasn't just a name and a date, it was like, here lies this person and they did this and they did this and they did this and they did this and they did this. And by the way, they were married to this person and blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah. Like incredible things there of like people who are kind of largely forgotten, you know, like one day you and I, Andrew will probably be forgotten most likely. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah.
00:07:30
Speaker
And that's just how it goes. But like, think about all the people that will come by one day and like, you know, I think you want to get cremated. Don't you Andrew? Yeah. Yeah. i'm i I am a by fire death person. There you go. And so, but like, you like, who knows? Like maybe you'll have like a memorial plaque somewhere or like ah a thing like that. Right. And I think for me, like, I'm not really sure what I want to do yet, but I'll probably have some sort of like my name on something somewhere.
00:07:55
Speaker
And like won't it be cool to have people come up to those and go, huh, who are these guys? you know What's that all about?
Cemetery Folklore and Notable Burials
00:08:02
Speaker
I just think it's really cool to think about. you know Well, thankfully, we have 129 episodes of this podcast. We will live forever in infamy. As long as people pay for the ah RSS feed. That's it, baby, right there.
00:08:17
Speaker
keep paying for it but yeah no i i have a very similar like i i i don't know why but like i was always a little horror kid and i don't really like know how to explain it but i was always fascinated by the morbid and the she the the haunted, if you will. Yeah, sure. And I think that like, you know, that does come from family members, that does come from having kind of a kind of, a I don't want to say morbid childhood, but like, I think like what you said, like, we both had, we were both introduced to death very early in age, which is an interesting thing to introduce to a childhood.
00:08:59
Speaker
And it just, I don't know, I don't know if you think this way, but it just does make you feel a little different. Like, I don't know, like, and so like, yeah, I i was always fascinated by graveyards. I i definitely had a Um, so my minor in college was photography back when we actually did like real photography, like where we developed film. And I definitely had a series where I went and took pictures of graves. So hell yes. Amen, dude.
00:09:29
Speaker
But um so Maddie, it looks like you have some of your favorite either cemeteries and or graveyards. Sure. So why don't you enlighten me a little bit about some of these favorites and why they are your favorite? Yeah, I would love to. um So let's start with one that's really close to home um and and where I live now in Dublin.
00:09:53
Speaker
um And this is called Glasnevin Cemetery. And Glasnevin Cemetery is in a part of Dublin called Glasnevin. And it's just a little bit north of city center. And from where I live, if I took a taxi to Glasnevin, it would be about like 20 minutes or so. So it's it's not it's not too far away. So you're saying you have. we pray oh oh many Many times, many times. um Because it's it's not super easy to get up there if you don't really. So if you ever do visit Dublin,
00:10:21
Speaker
i would i would I would just take a taxi. It's just a lot easier. Anyways, there's a lot of reasons to go up there. I mean, number one, um there is the National Botanic Gardens, which is right next to the cemetery, um which is very, very beautiful. It's like any other Botanic Gardens that you've been to before. Lots of really interesting plants and trees and just stuff like that. So really gorgeous stuff. um There is the cemetery, of course, which I will talk about in just a moment.
00:10:46
Speaker
But then there is also there's also a pub next door called Cavanaugh's, which is more commonly referred to as the grave diggers. And the grave diggers is a really, really cool fucking pub.
00:11:01
Speaker
And it's actually one of and ah um Anthony Bourdain. I almost called him Andrew Bourdain. It's actually one of of Anthony Bourdain's ah favorite pubs. And if you watch the episode that he that he created when he was in Dublin, which is a really cool episode. It's like a long time ago. So much stuff has changed since then.
00:11:21
Speaker
But um if you if you watch it, he he goes and into Kavanagh's. He has their famous kadal, which is a very traditional style of kadal, which is kind of like a soup. And um he writes in their guestbook. And what he writes in their guestbook is this must be what heaven looks like. And it's something and like if you go in there, if you ask to see it, they will show it to you. And he signs it, Anthony Bourdain. And you can you know like sit in the in the seat where where he where he sat, which is just, if you're an Anthony Bourdain fan, which I am, it means a lot, right? And you can see why. It's a very, very classic style pub. And the food is really good. The people are extraordinarily nice. And if you are into Guinness, it is a damn fine pint of Guinness.
00:12:05
Speaker
now anyways that's the pub what you want to do first before you go to the pub so that you're not wasted for it is that you go to the cemetery which is right next door to the pub literally the big gate is right there and so it reminds me of fireside yeah yeah it's it's very similar to that yeah yeah for sure i missed the fireside andrew oh we'll talk about that in a minute because that's that's on my list here too um But they called it gravediggers because the cemetery workers would go to that pub after and they were of course referred to as gravediggers. Anyways, over in the cemetery itself. Glasnaffen Cemetery is, um so I can't think of a better word for it. It's like the most sacred cemetery in Ireland.
00:12:44
Speaker
And the reason why is that it how it it it um houses the graves of the heroes of of Ireland. And so you know nearly every hero of the revolution, um ah the the the major Taoiseachs and Taunishtas, who are the prime ministers and sort of like the vice prime ministers, basically, they are all buried there. And there are so many stories. If you ever go to Glasnap and Cemetery,
00:13:09
Speaker
do not skip the tour. Let me repeat. I did that before. I didn't go to tell the tour when I first went. Finally, when my sister came to visit with me, we went on the tour and I'll tell you, I love a good tour. This is one of the best tours ever. It is so good. And the stories that you learn and like and and like the graves that they take you to because it's a really big cemetery. If you don't know where to go, you're going to get kind of lost. Really, really incredible stuff. There's a beautiful tower right in the middle called O'Connell Tower, obviously in the honor of of Daniel O'Connell and never
00:13:42
Speaker
another hero of the revolution. And it's just a really incredible place to go. it's it's ah I think, too, if you're if you're ever coming to Ireland, it's a really good place to start because you know so the Ireland that we know now was shaped by that time period. yeah and And without the revolution and without the incredible sacrifices that a lot of of people made,
00:14:03
Speaker
um There wouldn't be the country that I get to live in today and call home. And so it gives you a really good sense of like, if you've never been here before, ah, this is where it all kind of started with these people right here. So that is one of my absolute favorite cemeteries. Highly recommend you got to check it out.
00:14:19
Speaker
Now, let me tell you about another cemetery that we actually talked about very recently. In fact, even just two episodes ago, and it is called Step Cemetery. This is technically in Martinsville, Indiana, but I would still call it Bloomington, Indiana.
00:14:35
Speaker
It is in the Morgan Monroe State Forest. Nobody cares about Martin. No, they don't. Well, also, Martinsville is where the KKK was born, so we try not to do much. Oh, perfect. You know what I mean? Yeah, let me just tell you this. If you're ever in central Indiana trying to get to IU or trying to get to Indianapolis, maybe just don't stop in Martinsville. It's really not worth it. You could even say that it's in a place called Benton Township. That's also another possible thing.
00:15:01
Speaker
Anyway, I distinctly remember a ah road sign that you could you could get off the highway and either go to Whitesville or Brownsburg or Brownsburg. Totally, totally. um So anyways, here it is. Step cemetery. We talked about this in a previous episode, like I said, but this is a cemetery that has a lot of folklore around it. It was established in the very early 19th century.
00:15:25
Speaker
um It is literally in the middle of a state forest and so like if you don't know how to get there and it's like your first time, you will not find it. It's a guarantee. So you need to go with somebody who knows or you need to ask people in town to give you really clear directions on how to get there.
00:15:41
Speaker
um The only way that you know it's Step Cemetery is
Social Media's Impact on Cemeteries
00:15:44
Speaker
you come upon a concrete wall on your left as you're driving through. And um you wouldn't know it was a cemetery at all. But if you stop and just go in a few meters, you then start to see, oh, there are some very little graves over there. And then you see a sign for Step Cemetery and it says established early 1800s.
00:16:03
Speaker
um So it's a really cool place. um it's it's not a very like um ah how can i say it like ah it's It's not a cemetery full of like cool headstones. That's not what this place is. the The brilliance of the place is that it's in the middle of the woods, it doesn't make a whole lot of sense why it's there, and it is spooky as hell.
00:16:21
Speaker
There are some headstones. There's a lot more like stones that are sort of like laid flat on the ground, if that makes sense, like like kind of like the rectangle shaped ones or whatever. Yeah. yeah What do you what do you call those? Just kind of like they're not headstones, but rave markers or something like that. Grave markers that basically make sense. Yeah. yeah um And so what what what um why people go to the cemetery so often is because of all the folklore and the haunting of this place, right? So there is a spot near the center of the cemetery where there is just a giant tree stump. um In that episode before, I mentioned how I have played Ouija board on that tree stump. Probably not a good idea, but I did it. I was young and stupid. Anyways,
00:17:04
Speaker
Um, we would go there late at night. Um, sometimes we would go there after midnight when we were young and in college and just hang out there, drink and smoke and like, just hang out and just be spooky and weird. And I can wait for something to happen. And the story behind it is that there is a woman that's still haunts step cemetery and that her house was very nearby and that she is still waiting for the, for the, uh, the arrival of her daughter who went out one night with a guy and never came back because she was killed in an accident. So you'll hear that story. You'll also hear about 20 other different versions of it. on And no one knows what what what is what is true. What I will tell you is this. If you ever do get a chance to go there, Step Sematary is really cool. It's neat. Don't get me wrong.
00:17:49
Speaker
but that whole forest is really awesome. You're going to want to go a little bit further on into what we call the fire tower. And the fire tower is just what it sounds like. It is a very, very tall and steep climb to a fire tower, which is where firemen of yesteryear would climb up to and they would just kind of keep century and they would watch for forest fires It would look for fires. That's it. And there were multiple ah fire towers out there. It is a scary climb. It's even scarier climb down in my opinion, but it's pretty cool. And you can also go camping in that forest as well, which is really, really neat. So that is another one for me. It is called Step Cemetery. And like I said, I would still call it Bloomington, but maybe you can call it Martensville if you want.
00:18:32
Speaker
um On to the next one. ah Very, very famous cemetery in Chicago, and this is called Graceland Cemetery. Graceland Cemetery is very close to Wrigley Field. You can enter it right off of Clark Street, which is the street that that that that
Haunting Stories and Childhood Customs
00:18:49
Speaker
Wrigley Field is on. Wrigley would probably be about, how many blocks do you think, Andrew? South?
00:18:54
Speaker
Uh, probably like 10 blocks. I was going to say maybe, maybe like 10 blocks. So it was really not far at all. Grayson cemetery is so special because number one, it's, it's also an Arboretum. Um, it's, ah it's an incredible, beautiful green cemetery to go to lots of trees, lots of really beautiful flowers and floral work, just an incredible place.
00:19:17
Speaker
And it also happens to be one of two cemeteries that are that that is home to the dead, rich and famous. And so in um in Graceland Cemetery, you will find a number of of really famous people and sort of like the aristocracy of Chicago. And it's just an amazing place to go.
00:19:38
Speaker
Um, you know, living in Chicago, as long as I did, I went to Grayson cemetery a lot. And, um, it's a beautiful place
Film and Show Reviews
00:19:45
Speaker
to like, just, you know, kind of ride your bike down there and just, you know, go in and walk around. And you know you're gonna find people that are like famous athletes, politicians, industrialists, um the the the architects who really built sort of like the skeleton of Chicago, pardon the pun. um And like it's it's it's probably where most of Chicago's most prominent figures are buried. And it's just a beautiful, beautiful place. um one One really cool thing is, oh God, I forget his name now.
00:20:14
Speaker
um But one of one of the architects Daniel Burnham Daniel Burnham, that's it Daniel Burnham um who was a famous architect in Chicago um He is buried there He designed his own grave and the grave is actually an island And so what you do is it's it's a little bit kind of like deep into the cemetery but when you drive up to it um you have to cross this like little bridge that goes over a moat and He and his wife are both buried there And it's just, it's spectacular. It's absolutely a spectacular resting place. And it's a place where you can go and contemplate and just sit with it. Really, really beautiful. So Graceland Cemetery, that is the next one here. Really highly recommend. Now, the next one is another one in Chicago. And this one is probably my favorite one of all time, to be honest. And it's my favorite one because I've spent ah sort of a strange amount of time there. If if I'm being honest, it's kind of weird. and
00:21:13
Speaker
Um, but, uh, where I lived last in Chicago was in a neighborhood called Ravenswood. Um, and I lived on a street called Winchester. And if you kept following Winchester North, you would go into, um, a sort of like this, like half neighborhood called Bowmanville and Bowmanville off of Ravenswood Avenue, you would find the entrance to Rose Hill Cemetery. Now it's called Rose Hill because the guy who actually, uh, created it,
00:21:42
Speaker
His last name was Roe. And so when the he went to go register after he bought the plot of land to create the cemetery, the city deed office um didn't write Roe apostrophe S. Hill. They wrote Rose Hill. And that's how it came to be known as Rose Hill, which is a funny little trivia bit about it.
00:22:03
Speaker
um It's a really, really cool cemetery. It is also gigantic. It is huge. It is a huge cemetery. People are still being buried there today. There's a very big, beautiful sort of like classic style mausoleum.
00:22:19
Speaker
And there are graves in there that will just knock you out. Incredible place. And occasionally deer. Yeah. Oh, deer, deer all the time. In fact, one of the last times that I was in Rose Hill Cemetery, I was there on a run and I started running in the cemetery during the pandemic because it was the pandemic and things were weird. Right. Yeah. And so I would run through it.
00:22:40
Speaker
At the last run that i that I took there that I remember taking, and I was about on my way out of it. And I'm running, and I've got my headphones in, you know, music on full blast, all that kind of thing. So you're not really paying attention. All of a sudden on my right hand side, literally a deer, a fucking stag with like horns and shit antlers comes running right in front of me, like right in front of me. And I was like, Oh oh my God. It was, it was pretty scary to be honest.
00:23:05
Speaker
um So the cool thing about Rose Hill is when you enter it, there is the gatehouse. And the gatehouse is sort of in like this like gothic, weird style that you don't really find in Chicago in many places. And it looks a little bit like like the entrance to like a castle. So you feel like you're going somewhere really, really old as soon as you get there.
00:23:29
Speaker
And then as you go through, you're immediately hit with a number of different like memorials. so So right off to your left, you're going to see the Civil War dead from Chicago. So you've got, I would say probably about 150 different like, like those military style headstones, they're kind of like white and oval, if that makes sense, right? So you've got a bunch of those there. And it is really cool to go read those and see how young those guys were.
00:23:54
Speaker
um Sometimes I've walked by them and I'm like, I wonder if this guy was cute. Like, that's a cute name. Was he cute when he was in the Civil War? I bet he was. um Other plots of land in there will have will have the people that died in the influenza pandemic.
00:24:10
Speaker
um The Iroquois Theatre Fire, where 600 people died, there are 61 of those victims buried there. There is a beautiful, beautiful monument to Lulu Fellows, which is this this woman who is lying down and it is encased in glass, and it is just absolutely gorgeous. And so because it's encased in glass, that that sculpture inside has been preserved so well over, you know, however many 150 years probably that that yeah it's been there. um Also supposed to be very haunted. People leave coins on the outside of it. um Oscar Meyer is buried there, which is kind of funny. um And it's just a beautiful place. you know Like I said, I used to go running there. And like it's the kind of place where you can. And it's it's just really fucking neat.
00:25:00
Speaker
um Andrew mentioned earlier a place called um the fireside, the fireside yeah which is very close. It's just outside of the gates of Rose Hill. um It's a place where people still have like funeral luncheons if they are if they are having a funeral nearby at Rose Hill.
00:25:17
Speaker
And we've been there many times. i we Fireside is cool. it's We spent a Halloween there. if you yeah Great Halloween's there. like Their food is good. They're really cool people. And like especially in fall and the spooky time, it's a really great place to go. um So I would definitely
Return of the Living Dead Discussion
00:25:35
Speaker
check that out if you were ever close by. um Now, my final final one that I want to mention,
00:25:41
Speaker
is ah is one called Highgate Cemetery. Highgate Cemetery is in London, in the area of London called Highgate, which is a very well-to-do area in in in in in the boroughs. um It is absolutely beautiful, the cemetery. It is the resting place of many, many famous people, including Karl Marx, for example,
00:26:05
Speaker
who has a very cool um a very cool ah grave there with a gigantic bust of his head. And it is just really something else. It's extremely wooded and there's a lot of ivy all over the place. like If you just think in your head right now, old English cemetery, you got it. like like You're probably picturing it right now.
00:26:28
Speaker
um And there are a number of other people ah buried there that are really, really just like cool and um and and famous. Bob Hoskins is buried there. God, I'm looking at a list right now. Let me let me find some other people here. um I think Lord Byron is buried there for some reason.
00:26:47
Speaker
Uh, there's so many names on this. Hold on. Anyways, just, just, there's so many names. I don't even have time to look. Just trust me. There's a lot of really great people buried there. If you're ever in London and looking for that sort of experience, highly recommended going there. And I'll tell you the last time I was there.
00:27:04
Speaker
um was right around, well, not really. I guess it was in 2017 is the last time that I went there. and If you recall, that would have been like right after, not right after, but pretty close. ah George Michael died. right and so George Michael lived very close to Highgate Cemetery. He lived in Highgate. and so When I was there too, and I think he might even be buried there, i but I might be i might be mistaken. Anyways, just outside of the cemetery is a boulevard in Highgate.
00:27:32
Speaker
And when i was last there there was this memorial for george michael that it must have stretch for a quarter of a mile not joking flowers and paintings and pictures and flags and this kind of thing and that kind of thing it was honestly it It was beautiful. It was really, really beautiful. So that has to be one of my all-time favorite cemeteries. um my My friend Bridget brought me there because she knew that I loved cemeteries, of course, and getting to go there was just such a treat. So if if you're ever in London, make that something that you go and do because it's well worth your time.
00:28:07
Speaker
um Some other, of course, notables that I would mention is, of course, going to Salem. Andrew and I got to see some really cool little cemeteries when we were there last year. It's a very sad cemetery, though. It is, yeah, yeah. Boston, of course, has cemeteries kind of all over the place. Haleiwa in Hawaii actually has a really cool cemetery on the north shore of Oahu.
00:28:28
Speaker
um Rome has some crazy cemeteries. ah Berlin had some crazy ones, of course, too. Chappellon, which happens to be the one where my dad is buried in Sherville, Indiana. It's actually a really beautiful cemetery. I like it quite a bit. And then I even thought about Graceland in Memphis itself, where Elvis himself is buried. And we can call that a cemetery. More than just him are are buried there. And so it's a really neat place. So look, I could go on about cemeteries literally all day. I think I just spoke about them for at least 15 minutes. right there. um So that's me, Andrew. How about you on cemeteries and graveyards? Tell me. Yeah. um Can I tell you about one that is not in our notes, but I just like remembered that fascinated me for a very long time until I looked up the history and I just really love to hear about it really quick.
00:29:15
Speaker
Um, so there is a cemetery. If you go on foster Avenue in Chicago and you just go West and you kind of wouldn't even like notice it, but I've, I've noticed it a couple of times and I finally, it was like, what does this mean? Because it's called the bohemian national cemetery. Yep. I've heard of this one.
00:29:37
Speaker
And i I kind of was like, OK, so it's not religiously focused. Like, what is this? Like, what is the Bohemian National Cemetery? And I finally looked it up. So the cemetery was established by members of Chicago's Czech community in 1877. The community has actually been outraged when a Czech Catholic woman named ah Marie. I'm going to butcher her last name because I don't speak Czech, but it's Silhenek.
00:30:03
Speaker
and was denied burial at several Catholic cemeteries in Chicago because she supposedly never made her Easter duty, which basically means she didn't go to confession on Easter Sunday. Oh my God, fuck off. So basically in in response to that, they purchased land in Jefferson Township, which is where I'm talking about, death part um to create a ah cemetery that they could control.
00:30:29
Speaker
And to this day, they still control that land, which I think is fascinating. And honestly, kind of a cool early fuck you to Catholicism. That is really cool. You know, i've I've known Bohemian, but I didn't I didn't know that history behind it. So I'm glad you said that. That is really, really cool.
00:30:47
Speaker
So a couple of things, like when I think of cemeteries, when I think of like childhood and like think of like what we thought of cemeteries as kids, like, did you ever have the weird thing of like, hold your breath while like driving by the cemetery? I don't think so.
00:31:02
Speaker
So we always have this thing as kids like, Oh, you got to hold your breath while you drive by the cemetery. Like boy. And like, ah it got me thinking, like, I was like, and and I've heard this from many, many people that this is like a weird thing that you just like learned. It's kind of like Bloody Mary, like we talked about, you know, and I was like, well, where does this come from?
00:31:21
Speaker
And like, there's honestly not like a good reason, but I found some kind of like, quote unquote, like guesses based on the past. So best guesses are that this came from plague times where, where bodies were either not disposed of adequately or they were disposed of in mass graves. Thus holding your breath protects you from foul smells or breathing in disease. Huh?
00:31:46
Speaker
interesting so that it's kind of something um some say so this is where kind of like the the urban legend part of it comes in some say you should hold your breath so that you do not make the jealous the the spirit's jealous um like you're breathing they're not others say to hold your breath to prevent spirits from entering your body and possessing you oh dear so we'll learn a little bit more about that when we talk about grave dancers but Um, some interesting things about, um, cemeteries that have happened recently. I want to tell you a little bit about this and unfortunately we're going to talk about TikTok, but just bear with me for sure. Um, so have you heard about this woman?
00:32:32
Speaker
she's known as kind of like the, she's quote unquote, the clean girl. I don't know if you, if you've not. i've never heard of that before So she started off innocently enough as someone who would go and help people like hoarders, like clean their houses. Like that was like,
00:32:48
Speaker
her subreddit of the internet. Like, you know what I mean? Like she got volunteer to go help. Then she kind of got big on tick tock. Then she got sponsored by scrub daddy, which if you don't know, is kind of like a sponge. You know, what I want, I want a scrub daddy. I don't have one. We have, we have many, but um but there's something weird that happened with her. I'm just going to read you something from the New York post.
00:33:12
Speaker
A cleaning influencer has stirred up controversy after tidying up neglected graves sans permission because she feels that quote-unquote everyone deserves a beautiful resting place. Videos of the tomb bathers morbid seeming maintenance routines have amassed millions of views on TikTok.
00:33:34
Speaker
quote, I am at the graveyard at night cleaning this abandoned grave for free. The woman known as the clean girl on the platform in tones from an unidentified graveyard in one of the macabre clips where she boasts more than 19 million views. Yeah.
00:33:53
Speaker
In the freaky footage, the pixie blonde influencer is but can be seen shoveling dirt from around the soot caked tombstone as if she's about to excavate it, but then in a bizarre twist, she starts spraying the headstone with some bubble gum paint cleaner and scouring it clean with a Scrub Daddy brand sponge.
00:34:12
Speaker
Which is one of her sponsors. Of course. Quote, what happened? How did this grave get so dirty? Ponder's clean girl to her one million TikTok viewers. At one point, the freelance cemetery custodian, even somewhat disturbingly, starts reflecting on the grave's occupant. Quote, her name's Benavita.
00:34:33
Speaker
the perky girl explains while polishing her headstone. Wow. Her name even means welcome in Espanol. Oh my God. ah She continues her macabre contemplation gushing. Well, Benavita died on July 23rd, 1980. Oh, her star sign is Aries. My best friend was Nares. I wonder if Benavita's life was like, she also randomly asks,
00:34:58
Speaker
Does she like chocolate cupcakes? By the end of the clip, the gravestone is so sparkling clean it could be in a museum. During another tombstone reed recommendation remediation video, the k clean girl can also be seen scrubbing it in an uncombed grave of a dead baby. This was extremely hard for me, the clean freak lament laments in the clip, but I knew I had to honor baby David by transforming his final resting place. Interesting. interesting
00:35:30
Speaker
and And then, so like this goes on and on. I'm i'm not gonna read the whole thing. um You can read it on the New York Post, but like TikTok commenters, they kind of had like mixed feelings, which honestly I kind of do too. but like So some people were like, quote, you're so kind to be cleaning a gray for free.
00:35:50
Speaker
but then other people were like, uh, it doesn't feel right touching someone else's grave without the permission of the family. Or like you emphasize you're doing it for free, but you're doing it for content, which means you're making money off of it. yeah So this is kind of a weird one for me. Like I get, I get like,
00:36:15
Speaker
I don't know. I think if I saw an old lady like cleaning up graves for free, I would think it was kind of sweet. But I think because it's like a tick tock trend and it's sponsored by scrub daddy and it's all this other stuff that I'm just like, this feels gross. I don't know how you feel about it. Yeah. I mean, so I, I didn't know she was called the clean girl or whatever. I i have seen those before. My, my brother sent me them and then, and then I started to watch it. i I don't watch a lot of reels or anything. I don't watch tick tock at all. I refuse to have it on my phone. Um, but she's, she's, you you can also watch it on like Instagram and stuff too. yeah Um, so I've watched it there. You know, I would say that like the first time I watched it, I didn't really give it a whole lot of thought. I just kind of thought, eh, that's kind of cool. Look at her. She's getting shut up. But I guess like,
00:37:02
Speaker
I don't know. On on re in retrospect, it does kind of become like, well, it's not really your space to clean kind of thing. Like it is. that I don't know how it would feel about somebody going to my dad's grave and doing that. Right. And like, you know, look, I have been to my dad's grave in ah a lot. It's been a long, long time.
00:37:22
Speaker
But like I remember when I would go there, like we would all bring scissors and stuff to like cut the grass around it and like you know put a candle in this or do that or do this. And like I think it would make me feel weird if somebody else did that for me. like right like that's That's my job. You know what I mean? like it's not It's not really your job to do that. And i don't I don't really want you doing that, to be honest. And then at the same time, I don't know. It's kind of like, well,
00:37:51
Speaker
Like no one else is going to do it. And if she wants to do it, I don't there's not really a big problem with it, especially if like they're really old graves. Like it's kind of like who cares almost. I don't know. it it's It's kind of a weird thing, I guess. I don't really know how I feel about it.
00:38:07
Speaker
i I think that what gets me is just like it's the social media aspect of it. Just like that you feel that you have to do this to gain clout. And like i I don't like that part of it, but. And, but then again, at the same time, like, isn't that everything anymore? Like literally everything, like there there's nothing that isn't content anymore. Especially, you know, look, look at us speaking to people who literally create content, but like, it's like, everything is content. You're not going to stop it almost. And so like, I don't even have a soul. Like, I don't know. I don't know, Andrew. I'm not sure.
00:38:45
Speaker
Yeah, I know. It's kind of a complicated one. But but you know, I will say one one more thing about it. Like, you know, look, graves are hard to read when they get older. So there is what one thing that she is doing is helping to illuminate stories like we said before. You know, like the only thing that I don't know is like I wonder how, like, is she doing it in like a preservationist kind of way? You know? Like, it it think is it healthy for the stone? Like, is it is it keeping it good? that's That's the one thing that I would be like, maybe you should watch out for that. And like like you just said, probably not. Like, are you using safe chemicals? Is it like soap that you can use on that kind of stuff? And like, if she's doing it at night, like, is she doing that so that the people in the cemetery don't like catch her doing it kind of thing? Like,
00:39:36
Speaker
That seems kind of weird to me. Yeah. Yeah. All right. So one thing that I want to leave our listeners with is a little story. And it's a story that haunted me as a child because it came in the book, Scary Stories to Tell in the Dark. Cool.
00:39:55
Speaker
um And this is one of those ones that like really haunted me. So like when we talked about like doing this episode, I was like, we got to put this in the episode. So he yeah I'm just going to read it to you and then you can react after. It's not it's not very long. So it's ah it's it's only about four paragraphs. It's called The Girl Who Stood on the Grave.
00:40:16
Speaker
Some boys and girls were at a party one night. There was a graveyard down the street, and they were talking about how scary it was. Quote, don't ever stand on the grave after dark, one of the boys said. The person inside will grab you, he'll pull you under. That's not true, one of the girls said. It's just a superstition. I'll give you a dollar if you stand on the grave, said the boy.
00:40:42
Speaker
A grave doesn't scare me, said the girl. I'll do it right now. The boy handed her his knife. Stick this knife in one of the graves, he said. Then we'll know you were there. The graveyard was filled with shadows so and was quiet as death.
00:40:59
Speaker
There was nothing to be scared of, the girl told herself, but she so was scared anyway. She picked out a grave and stood on it. Then quickly she bent over and plunged the knife into the soil. And then she started to leave, but she couldn't get away. Something was holding her back. She tried a second time to leave, but she couldn't move. She was filled with terror. Something has got me. She screamed and she fell to the ground.
00:41:25
Speaker
When she didn't come back, the others went to go look for her. They found her body sprawled across the grave. Without realizing it, she had plunged the knife through her skirt and pinned herself to the ground. It was only in the knife that had held her. She died of fright.
00:41:47
Speaker
That story always scared me so much as a kid. You know, it's like, as as you were going through it, I was like, Oh, I remember this one. I just can't remember like how it ends. That that is God. That book is fucking traumatizing for children. Like no wonder we are fucked up. I definitely have all three on paperback. Jeez. Oh Pete's. Well, Andrew, that was a fun chat about graveyards and cemeteries. yeah Um, shall we move on to our next segment? Yeah. Let's move on to what you've been watching bitch.
00:42:29
Speaker
And welcome back to what you've been watching, bitch. What you've been watching you cemetery walking bitch. Oh, if you're, this is your first time with us on the show. This is the segment to where we talk about surprise or what we have been watching. Um, this is a look, we just recorded last week and I'll be honest.
00:42:48
Speaker
had a chance to watch much of anything. So Andrew and I have fewer selections than we usually do, but that's okay. So Andrew, why don't you go ahead and give us the first thing that you've been watching, bitch. Sure. This is on Hulu and I'm going to give a little bit of a forward, if you will, because I am obsessed and was obsessed and have always been obsessed with Baywatch. I don't know how else to tell you this, but it's just an obsession of mine that I have in an alternate universe. I have a a podcast called Gay Watch, where I watch Baywatch and talk to you all about it. But arm there is a new documentary on Hulu. It's a four part documentary called After Baywatch, A Moment in the Sun. And I got to tell you, for anyone that was ah even minorly obsessed with Baywatch in the 1990s,
00:43:44
Speaker
You got to watch it because there's so much that they talk about and so openly that they've never really talked about. um That was Baywatch because there's there's a lot of things that I didn't know. Like I didn't know that it was on a it was on ABC for one season and then it was syndicated. And that's where I watched in syndication on on a U.S. on USA.
00:44:09
Speaker
uh which is USA even the network anymore i don't know i have no idea um but like Mitch Buchanan like all ah but It's just so many memories about Baywatch and my little gay brain ah that I was reintroduced to through this documentary. And I was really appreciative. They got so many people back and they got so many people back that were willing to be like, you know, like there's one thing to talk about, like the Pamela Anderson of it all, because like, let's let's be honest, that was like a big part of Baywatch is like the Pamela Anderson sure and and Tommy Lee and the sex tape and like all that stuff.
00:44:45
Speaker
But like there was so much more going on with that show and so much more going on with all the the people on it. And honestly, you got to watch it because it's fascinating to hear about like just the story of how the show came to be and how the show um like went on. And like honestly, I'm not going to say destroyed, but like it really like haunted people for a long time, like the actors and actresses that couldn't get work beyond that because they were on Baywatch. There's a lot about Playboy in it and like how Playboy kind of fed into the Baywatch system. boy does have And there's just a lot of really fascinating things. So if you have any interest in in kind of the history of Baywatch or the history of like the 90s, if I'm being honest, because this is like what the 90s was all about, I would definitely consider watching after Baywatch a moment in the sun.
00:45:37
Speaker
Cool. Uh, my next one is called slow horses. I have talked about this show before. Um, this is a show on apple TV plus, and it is a show that is really good. It is a show about, uh, about spies. And it's about, um, it's specifically about a bunch of spies, not, not spies about like, about like FBI people, but in the UK, think of it that way. Right. Well, yeah, and they're they're sort of like always watching out for it and like battling against it within the country. And um it's really, really cool. it's It's based on a series of novels by a guy named McCarran, also called Slow Horses um and or or excuse me, it's called Slough House. And it's called Slow Horses because it is it refers to the place where all of these ah sort of like
00:46:26
Speaker
MI5 service rejects. It's where they work and it's called Slough House. So Slough Horses, there you go. Anyways, ah in the show, a lot of really great people are in it. Gary Oldman plays Jackson Lamb, who is the guy that basically heads up this division called the Slow Horses. Jonathan Price is in it, ah who plays the grandfather of one of the main characters played by Jack Loudon.
00:46:47
Speaker
um who plays River Cartwright. And one of my favorite actresses of all time, Kristin Scott Thomas, is in as the Deputy Director of MI5. And just she's she's good in everything, but she's really, really good in this. So anyways, season four just started. I've only seen one episode so far, um but it was really good. And um look, if you've never watched the show before, I highly recommend doing it.
00:47:13
Speaker
um You're not that far behind it's really really worth it so and if you're if you're into sort of like spy stuff espionage stuff like that kind of thing you're gonna really love this it's a really funny show but it also like it gets It gets deep in every single series. And that I think that that's really cool. So, uh, like I said, it's on series four. It just started. I won't even tell you what happened because literally I'm only one episode in, I hardly know, uh, but it's really well worth it. And it is called slow horses on Apple TV plus.
00:47:44
Speaker
Cool um My next one. I know i'm I'm late to the party on this one, but it just premiered on Paramount Plus So this is a quiet place day one. Oh, I haven't seen this yet um Listen as as kind of you know with this podcast you can go back to I think the first ten episodes I'm not a huge I'm not a huge fan of like the quiet place movies like I just there's There's a logic there that I just can't quite grasp and I can't quite get behind. um Like the fact that they should have just gone and and lived by the waterfall or whatever. um So this is day one. This takes place in New York City and it's kind of like how it all starts.
00:48:29
Speaker
so like It's literally like they're in New York City and, you know, they see sort of like a meteor type thing come down and then the creatures are there. Like that's the premise of the movie. um It follows our protagonist who is in Cancer host ah ha Hospice.
00:48:46
Speaker
Um, and she is just literally just trying to survive with her cat and this all goes down and all she wants is to get a piece of pizza. Like that's like her main thing in the movie. She just wants enough. Like she just wants her and I'm not going to get into, I'm not going to spoil anything because it gets into like why that, why that is the thing.
00:49:07
Speaker
Who don't want some pizza? You know, I want some pizza right now. I get it. Right. um And like what I will say about this movie, I think this is the best quiet place movie that has been so far. OK. If I'm being honest, I still had some issues with like the logic of the movie, of course, because like I still don't really get this whole like sound thing because enough.
00:49:29
Speaker
there There are certain times where like somebody will step on like a tiny glass shard and that's enough sound to make the monsters come. But then they can also have conversations and then the monsters don't come. So I'm like, yeah, it's a little bit hard for me to like wrap my head around. But like, honestly, if I'm if I'm being a true horror fan, I think that this is the best one of the three. Sure. um I think I think Quiet Place Park two is kind of just forgettable if I'm being honest. um I don't think a lot of people really even think about it.
00:49:59
Speaker
But, um, I, I do think that it is worth your time to check out a quiet place day one, because um if if if anything, you're going to get Lupita Nyong'o, uh, displaying a a wonderful acting, next acting chops. And for all you animal files out there, the cat lives. So just cat lives. Yeah. You know, I do need to see that. Um, I wasn't the.
00:50:25
Speaker
I think I liked it a little bit more than you, yeah but as part two I thought was pretty good. it I thought it was better than part one for sure. And then um this one, I really like when you get to when you do get to learn an origin story. So i've I've been looking forward to it really kind of just for that almost. I think you'll like it actually. Yeah. So I'm i'm looking forward to watching that. i'm I'm glad you've reminded me of it.
00:50:46
Speaker
um My next one is a film called All Is True. All Is True is a movie about William Shakespeare. And this was a movie that was directed by Kenneth Branagh and also stars Kenneth Branagh playing Shakespeare.
00:51:02
Speaker
Um, came out in 2018, um, came out to a lot of mixed reviews, I would say, but I think it's generally pretty good. And you know, I think it's pretty good for me because I'm obsessed with Shakespeare. And I know a ah good deal about the history of Shakespeare. I've, I've read.
00:51:18
Speaker
everything from Shakespeare and I studied it in college. So like i I naturally have a predisposition to like a movie like this. um So look it might not be for everybody, but it's it was definitely for me. Anyways, this is about sort of like near the near the end of Shakespeare's life.
00:51:37
Speaker
um like He's not quite dying here at all, but like it's he's definitely an old man by now, at least old for those days. so And so the movie takes place in 1613. This is after the Globe Theater had burned down. And so Shakespeare returns to Stratford-upon-Avon where he is from, um and he comes back to be with his wife Anne Hathaway.
00:51:57
Speaker
um Some things about Anne Hathaway that are really interesting that a lot of people don't know. um Number one is that she really never went to London. That was not where she would have ever been. And she also, I want i want you to think about this. The wife of maybe the greatest writer of all time could not read and could not write. oh my Isn't that amazing? She could not read or write. um Meanwhile, i mean they didn't know it then, but her husband still maybe is the the greatest writer of all time, at least at least in the English language.
00:52:30
Speaker
And so um also when when their son Hamnet was 11, I'm also in a book called Hamnet that that is ah ah a book of fiction that came out a few years ago. So, so wonderfully done. There's there's a new movie coming out about about that, actually. ah But Hamnet, their son died when he was 11 of plague um while he was in Stratford.
00:52:50
Speaker
Unfortunately, Shakespeare was in London when his son died. And so he missed it. And that that's something that really tore their marriage apart. And so this movie is sort of dealing with that right now about Shakespeare coming home. And it's a very domestic story. So this takes away all the plays. It takes away all of that kind of stuff. It puts Shakespeare in a whole new light for most people, which is him at his house in Stratford and everything else is taken away.
00:53:18
Speaker
And so talking about you know his his own relationship with his daughter, Judith, and his relationship with his wife, Anne, but then also his relationship with the ah the Earl of Southampton. Pardon me. And the Earl of Southampton was played by Ian McKellen in this. Meanwhile, his wife is played by none other than Judi Dench. So you have an incredible cast here of people, right? Kenneth Branagh, Judi Dench, Ian McKellen, the top three there, just right there. Stop stop the the the presses. This is an incredible movie.
00:53:48
Speaker
Um, really good stuff. I could go on and on about it, but let me just say that if you're, if you're interested in Shakespeare at all and you haven't watched this one, this is one that you should really watch. Um, it's a, it's a beautiful glimpse into the life of, of into the, you know, imagine life, but the life of one of the, uh, one of the most incredible people that has ever lived in the history of mankind. And I really think it's, it's worth your time. So give it a watch. It's called all is true.
00:54:14
Speaker
Cool. Uh, I think they like, I, I honestly had never heard of that that movie. Um, I feel like that the title is a little off when it like, I feel like you should shake spirit up a little bit, but maybe that's why it wasn't so popular. All this true is, is, is a line from one of his plays actually. And so that, that's where it comes from.
00:54:35
Speaker
So only the only the William of files. Right. Right. Right. So my last one, I actually went to the theater. Yes. Good for you. And went to go see Alien Romulus. ah Saw this at Skokie Village Crossings in the IMAX theater, which I have not been IMAX movie in five years. I've been IMAX and like probably sounds like Batman. um The Batman Batman, the Dark Knight, I think might be the last IMX I went to. Jesus. Wow. So um Alien Romulus. So from what I understand, because I'm still navigating the alien franchise, I've seen them all, but I'm still kind of figuring out like where they all line up is that this takes place in between alien and aliens. OK. When ah Ripley is kind of in her stasis mode of like trying to make it back
00:55:32
Speaker
to like where you know ah wherever she's going in aliens, I don't remember. um And this takes place on a kind of um like a mining planet ah where ah there there are people that sign up for, it's kind of like the army, like you sign up for like a term, like you're gonna go to this planet and you're gonna mine for this amount of time and then when you're done with this amount of time, you get to go to wherever you wanna go. okay And this is about a group of kind of younger people, quote unquote rebels that want to like buck the system and get out of this because literally all their family has died from disease in the mines. And they're like, I don't want to die from disease in the mines. Like I want to get out of here. I want to go to a planet that's much better than this. And they find that there is a ship
00:56:24
Speaker
In their orbit that has been um ah like disparaged like that the company doesn't want it anymore like that just kind of abandoned it. And so they're like we could take the ship and we could take their um what do you call it when you dispatch from the ship like that their. symbolbar No, like, you know how, like the the hatches that they sleep in for like a long time. Oh, yeah. yeahre like It's like, um I know what you're talking about. Like hibernation chambers. Hibernation, yes. And they're like, if we go steal those, we can get on our ship and we can go to the next planet, which is nine years away. But obviously we can't do that unless we have our hibernation chambers. That's so far.
00:57:04
Speaker
Their whole like plan is to go on the ship and figure out how to get those hibernation chambers onto their ship. And then lo and behold, there might be some aliens on the show. And so it's just kind of like all about that. Like, OK, honestly, like this is coming from someone that like actually like really likes the alien franchise. Yeah, sure.
00:57:26
Speaker
apart from I don't really care for three, that's like the only one that I... Three is okay. That's the only one I like actively don't like. Yeah, I get that. But other than that, I like really like all of them. And I had... This was like...
00:57:40
Speaker
Listen, oh this is from the same guy that did the Evil Dead remake, Fedi Alvarez. Oh, OK. And just the terror is amped up. And I really liked it. I don't know. There are there are some people online that like, how what is this fan service that you do? And I'm like, you know what, you guys, everyone just go back to your basement. Like, I don't know what to do with you. Like.
00:58:08
Speaker
Just like leave, like let people like stuff. I don't know. nerd I really do feel that way sometimes, but you know what? I get it. It's it's like I did not to interrupt you, but like sometimes like, look, I get, I get the, the zealousness of nerds. I really do. Like, I mean, I'm sure there's stuff that like you and I feel very protective of. Well, we're about to talk about once. Well, exactly. But like sometimes it's like, man, give it a fucking rest, dude. Come on. Yeah.
00:58:33
Speaker
But anyway, I really liked it. I would encourage you to go see it in the theater because it is definitely a theatrical movie. Like it's definitely like big and boisterous. So like doing that sweet I would encourage you to go see it ah before it is out of the theater because these days you only get about two weeks of the theater. Yeah. so ain't like ain't Like it used to be, is it? You know?
00:58:56
Speaker
All right. What's your last one? My last one is, uh, okay. So Andrew, I, what I just talked about. right Yeah. Here we go. Right. Um, don't go see part two. Cause I hate part two with all my heart. I hate it. Um, so listen, I made one of the nerdiest purchases of my life about a week and a half ago. Do you want to know what it is, Andrew?
00:59:17
Speaker
Tell me. It is a Lego set. And I have I've literally never bought a Lego set in my life. I just want to point that out. But it is a Lego set for Hocus Pocus. It is the Sanderson sisters house. um I'll just tell you how much it costs because it's because it's fucking ridiculous. It cost me 230 euros. I'm not I'm not going to watch. It is. it So listen, like and also I've come to learn, by the way, that Legos are actually not for kids. They're not.
00:59:43
Speaker
Legos are for adults. They're they're there're for kid adults. Exactly. And and i was I was talking to my friend Kieran, another manager that I work with, and he was like, oh yeah, Matty, I have a lot of Lego. And I was like, Kieran, how much do you think you've spent on Lego over the past few years? He was like, probably about 4,000 euro. And I was like, oh my god. But like look, it is kind of amazing because if you're looking for stuff to do,
01:00:08
Speaker
It gives you a lot to do. And like frankly too, like when you're doing Lego, you can't think of anything else. You just, you have to look at your manual. And by the way, the manual that came with this thing is at least 200 pages long. It is a novel. It is a novel. And it shows you picture after picture of exactly what to do with with the little tiny pieces.
01:00:27
Speaker
And like, you just have to focus on it and go step by step by step by step by step, and get it done. And you don't have a choice to do it any other way. That's the only way to do it. And so you know, like, look, if you're a person who has anxiety, or if you've got, you know, stuff a lot of stuff on your mind, or if work is really crazy, which all that stuff can be true for me, im like, this is a really great way to spend your evenings, I'm not gonna lie. So I mean, it's a, it's a craft. Yeah. Frankly, it's been 230 Euro really well spent. I'm almost done with it. It's the fucking Sanderson house. It does amazing things. And yes, I will post plenty of photos on our Instagram so that you guys can see what this thing does. It lights up, it moves around, there's a water wheel, there's a fucking chimney and shit. And like, there's a little tiny beaks and there's the Sanderson sisters and there's max and everybody else. It's very, very cool. And it makes me happy.
01:01:16
Speaker
Anyways, because I bought this, of course I had to watch our, one of our favorites of all time, Hocus Pocus. Now listen, this little fucking nerd right here will tell you that Hocus Pocus part two is a fucking pile of bullshit. You should never watch it. And it sucks. It's trash. They should never have made it in the first place. It absolutely fucking blows. And also I was reminded from one scene with only one. Yes. but and and And also ah they, that my brother wrote the perfect sequel for Hocus Pocus. That is the only script that should be being made right now. Anyways, i got it you gotta make that you got to make that ah live some way. Listen, said Michael is listening to this right now, I can guarantee you. Michael, you have to get this into them. You have to do it. Like find a way you can do this. Anyways. It's a much better sequel. oh
01:02:03
Speaker
ah It's so good. I remember the first time i i read I read the synopsis of his story that he sent me, I started fucking bawling. It was that good. I'm not gonna lie. It's fucking genius. Anyways, um hocus pocus. How much do I love the Let Me Count the Ways? A thousand ways, at least. like It's literally one of the most perfect, dumb children's movies ever made.
01:02:25
Speaker
And it's so perfect because it is exactly the right amount of like, kitsch and camp, but also like emotion and empathy. And also like a comedy and comedy and also like enough innuendo to keep the adults happy. You know what I mean? And like, it's just so much fun. And like,
01:02:45
Speaker
and There are a lot of um young people these days that I that I've heard, like, really don't like Hocus Pocus. And they're like, this is stupid. Whatever. What? You're stupid. You know what? You're a dumb little idiot. How about that? Hocus Pocus is incredible. And if you're going to take away from the joy that I have with it, whatever. Right. Listen, Hocus Pocus is here to stay. It will always be a wonderful. It always have a wonderful place in my heart. and When Andrew and I and Michael got, got to go to Salem last year and we got to be outside of max's house. Like remember how amazing that was, Andrew? Like it was just, it was just right there. Like max's house at this house. is it It almost felt like we grew up in that house in some and strange way. where We were in Salem in the summer.
01:03:29
Speaker
Yes, right when they filmed this and it was just amazing. Yeah, it was so cool. Anyways, look, I could go on about Hocus Pocus. You already know what happens and you already know that you should watch it and you should watch it again because it's it's spooky time now. And so go ahead and watch it. And listen, if you got a couple of extra bucks laying around, you don't know what to do with them and you want something really fun to do. Join me fellow nerds in making a really silly purchase and go to Lego dot com and order it because I got to tell you, I'm about I'm about just over halfway done. you it's It's very fucking cool and I can't wait for it to be finished. So yeah, that's it from me. Hocus Pocus. Cool. um Can I give it just like but before we move on to our like ah you wrap up, can I give like a quick update on my Christopher Pike? Oh yeah, please do.
01:04:17
Speaker
So I have read Road to Nowhere, which was really fucking good. And I cried at the end. Oh, my God. um And then I read Chain Letter and Chain Letter to the Origin of Evil, which I thought. I thought Chain Letter was kind of like I know what you did last summer ripoff, but OK. And then when I read Chain Letter to the Origin of Evil, it kind of like gave the story kind of a well rounded ending, which I really appreciated and really loved.
01:04:47
Speaker
And now I am reading Scavenger Hunt. So if anybody is on this journey with me, or if you want to talk about Christopher Pike, we're online at Fraggy 13. So. That's right, baby. Hell yeah. Well, listen, another great edition of What You've Been Watching, Bitch. Andrew brought us among the Christopher Pike novels that he is reading. ah After Baywatch, A Moment in the Sun on Hulu, A Quiet Place Day One on Paramount Plus,
01:05:14
Speaker
and Alien Romulus on AMC. And Maddie brought us Slow Horses, which is on what do you call that? ah apple Apple TV plus Apple TV plus Hocus Pocus, which, come on, if you're not if you don't have free form or or you just like whatever, you find it. Right. And all is true, ah which you can just you can sign streaming and up in a number of places. Yeah. Yeah. But that does it for what you've been watching. Bitch, we will take a quick break and we'll be right back with our first cemetery watch, which is Return of the Living Dead.
01:05:57
Speaker
In the dark of the night, something strange is going on. um
01:06:16
Speaker
that movie? Night of the Living Dead. shot sp Well, say hello.
01:06:26
Speaker
have risen from the grave. Mister, there's a hundred of those things out there. How many did you say? One hundred. And now, the question is, how do we get them back into the ground?
01:06:40
Speaker
Frank, we have a little problem.
01:06:46
Speaker
Ten right!
01:07:12
Speaker
medical sciences battle. And it's a puzzle. Because technically, you're not alive. Why do you eat people?
01:07:47
Speaker
The military is nervous. your day usual crap The police are confused. um um um are Send more cops. It's not a bad question, Bert. It's not a bad question, Bert. It's not a bad question, Bert. The return of the living dead.
01:08:23
Speaker
In a sharp left corner from Night of the Living Dead, get ready for Return of the Living Dead. Andrew, tell us all about it. They're back from the grave and ready to party!
01:08:39
Speaker
When Forman Frank shows new employee Freddy a secret military experiment in a supply warehouse in Louisville, Kentucky, the two klutzes accidentally release a gas that reanimates corpses into flesh-eating zombies.
01:08:54
Speaker
As the epidemic spreads throughout the town and the creatures satisfy their hunger in gory and outlandish ways, Frank and Freddie fight to survive with the help of their boss and a mysterious mortician and a band of punks. They sure do.
01:09:13
Speaker
Directed by Dan O'Bannon, written by Dan O'Bannon. Distribution and production were handed by handled by Hemsdale Film Corporation, Fox Films, Cinema 84, and Orion Pictures. Bert is played by k Clue Gallagher. Frank is played by James Karen. Ernie is played by Don Caffee. Freddie is played by Tom Matthews. Tina is played by Beverly Randolph. Spider is played by Miguel new Nunez. Nunez, sorry.
01:09:42
Speaker
ah chirk chucklk chuck I think it's Chuck. Chuck is played by John Philbin. Casey is played by Jewel Shepherd. Scuzz is played by Brian Peck. And Trash, my favorite character, is played by Linnea Quigley. This is Rated R. It comes in at 91 minutes. It was released on August 16th of 1985.
01:10:06
Speaker
While they like to think that this is Louisville, it was filmed definitely in Los Angeles. That ain't Louisville, trust me. And the budget was $4 million, but it brought in $14.2 million and would go on to have two sequels of which I have never seen. Okay, so this movie, before I pass it to you, Maddie,
01:10:27
Speaker
um This is this was a one of those ones that I have seen clips of many, many times have never really sat down and watched the entire movie. What about you? Yeah, it's it's the exact same for me. um And so like I knew what to expect, but I didn't know what it would be like watching it in full. And it's it's one of those things where like, you know, you mentioned like you haven't watched a lot of the sequels like when it comes to this, I've really only watched Night of the Living Dead. And what was the one the first sequel? um
01:10:58
Speaker
Dawn of the dead? Dawn of the dead. And that's it. So I haven't even seen Day of the Dead, right? And so and like, it just wasn't really my thing. Zombies aren't the thing that really gets me going. And so I never really just thought about watching Return of the Living Dead. But let me tell you, I'm really glad that I did. This is a really fun watch. It is bizarre and wild. And I think it's really cool how how this reimagines the night of the Living Dead universe. Yeah. And it's just like, you know, something zany and crazy. And like you would have never thought that this is where that this would story would go. But here we are, a gas that reanimates the corpses. It wasn't really zombies before. It was just a military experiment. And that's how this kind of whole thing works. The movie is a lot of weird and wacky fun. It is very 80s.
01:11:56
Speaker
um with a lot of like um with a lot of like uh strangely like sexually androgynous dudes and like but also like masculine like dudes that are just like ready to fuck everything along with a lot of uh very feminine aggressive women who are ready to also fuck everything zombies who are insane and like your sort of like spoiled sport adults who are ready to like just be spoiled sport adults um like the general for example or the guy that owns the company or or whatever um there's a lot of like buddy buddy stuff in this too that i thought was really kind of funny because just
01:12:36
Speaker
It's just bizarre like how how things work in this movie. um And it was crazy. you know like i I had a really great time watching it. I watched it actually twice but before the show. And it was it was fun to watch just how strange it really was. And like look, I don't really know a lot of the lore behind the movie. The only thing that I know is that John Russo and George Romero just like didn't really agree on like what direction everything should be going.
01:13:04
Speaker
and so like I know that John Russo retained the dot dot dot of The Living Dead s sequels, right? And so I don't really fully know how much George Romero had to do with this. Do you? I don't think he had a lot to do with it. No, I think what happened and and forgive me if I'm remembering incorrectly, but I think I've watched enough documentaries about kind of this area of film is that they both just had different ideas about like where they wanted to take this. And so they kind of just like split. And they just kind of were like, you know what, you do your lane, I'm going to do my lane and we'll figure it out. Yeah. mean And ah according to Screen Rant, this article that I'm looking at right now, Romero agreed to use dot, dot, dot of the dead. And then John Russo got to use dot, dot, dot of the living dead. So that means that that the the different paths of the sequels would be quite different.
01:13:58
Speaker
And so from what I understand too, it's, it was amicable, like, you know, George Romero and John was who didn't like hate each other. No, that's kind of what I was just alluding to. Like, I think they were just kind of like, you know what, you do your lane, I'll do my lane, yeah whatever. it is data and I think it's actually kind of cool that these two filmmakers were like, you know what?
01:14:14
Speaker
Wouldn't it be fun if we just did some different shit with this? Wouldn't that be kind of cool? And I think that's exactly what happens here. Like, you know, it's really neat how like they just really do get bold and crazy and go, you know what? What if?
01:14:30
Speaker
Night of the Living Dead was really this blah, blah, blah, blah, blah. And then it just goes into it. There's a lot of really funky and fucked up shit in this. I think probably the my favorite part of it is when they have um the zombie woman who is like ah just an upper torso. Yeah. And they have her on the slab and she's been tied down by the mortician because he wants to like examine her and like ask her questions.
01:14:59
Speaker
And you learn a little bit more about like what makes these zombies zombies, right? And she goes into talking about how like you know they don't want to eat humans, they just want to eat brains. And why do you want to eat brains? Because the pain of being dead is so awful. And she can feel herself rot. And for whatever reason, eating brains makes it feel better.
01:15:22
Speaker
And that's, you know, ah listen, in the world of zombies, that's a very coherent justification for a zombie. Like we we know this is a zombie. There it is. that This movie is what gives us the lore of zombies wanting brains. That's it right there. I did not know that actually. So that's it, man. There it is. And like there's actually something about that whole like puppetry with that particular zombie that I think is just done.
01:15:50
Speaker
so well. like It's done really, really well. It's done almost so well that you almost feel bad for the zombies. you know we'll We'll get into it, but there's a lot more heart in this movie than ah ah that that that's not on surface on surface level. You know what I mean? Yeah. Yes. I mean, look, i I loved it. How did you feel about it?
01:16:10
Speaker
Yeah, so like I said, um I have circled around this movie for a very long time, but I had never just sat down and like watched it. um I kind of knew the gist going in because I know of Tom Matthews and kind of like his career and everything because he was in several of the Friday the 13th movies. um But like,
01:16:32
Speaker
I just never like I never gave this movie kind of the credence to be good, if that makes any sense. Like, I thought it was just kind of like a goofy movie, you know what I mean? Like, yeah. And so watching it this time, I was like, wow, this actually is really good. Like, I don't know. There's there's there's something in here that it. And you know what? I will circle back to the ending because I think the ending is a little bit of a cop out, but willll we'll figure we'll we'll talk about that. um But like the overall movie, I just.
01:17:01
Speaker
I don't know I found it to be like tonally all over the place because there is like that there are bits of comedy that I think are really funny I mean the first like 15 minutes before we get like the the of the opening credits is kind of just goofy like it it it's very slapstick it's very like um Uh, three Stooges almost like totally yes with with those two guys just kind of like hanging out and like figuring out like what's going on. And it's just like, a bit of but it's it's like a bit of a buddy film to start with almost. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. And then like we get the opening credits and then kind of the punks come in and like the movie kind of changes from there.
01:17:39
Speaker
And then the last third of the movie is kind of like an exploration on death itself, which is very weird. um So like overall, like this normally wouldn't work for me because I'm I'm kind of a tone person. Like I want to settle into something and and get into it. But like this one worked because it was like all sprinkled in with like a dose of comedy like throughout. Like there was always like a little bit of comedy. So it it kind of worked for me.
01:18:09
Speaker
and and like Honestly, we'll we'll talk about some of the the special effects, but I was a little thrown off by the special effects at first, but then once they get good, they were really good. um and so like Honestly, like i don't I don't have too much to say on surface level, but I just really had a fun time watching this movie. yeah you know I'm looking at and another article right now from collider dot.com about Return of the Living Dead. It actually came out in June of this year.
01:18:37
Speaker
And something interesting in this article is that apparently Return of the Living Dead was originally going to be a serious horror film. And apparently like when when it was when it was written and when they when they went to it, um the distributor said that they didn't want to have a serious horror movie. And and here's what here's what wrote what what John Russo said. John Russo said, quote, the distributor said straight horror is dead and you have to turn it into a comedy.
01:19:04
Speaker
Well, straight horror is never really dead if you come up with a good idea. At that time, it was out of my control. I liked what Dan dan o'bannon of course like what dan did, though. He was a good guy and he did a hell of a job and so did all the people in the movie. And so like this could have been very different had the distributor agreed with John Russo that they you know wanted to create something actually kind of serious, but just in a different vein. um But like imagine if if that had happened, right? Like we wouldn't have this sort of like,
01:19:32
Speaker
spoofy, culty movie that is actually so fun to watch. I mean, even even just the cover of the movie and like, you know, if you've never even seen it, you can probably see the cover in your head right now. It's like two very classic punks that are like skeleton zombies holding on to a gravestone. And it just says the return of the living dead on it with another zombie punk.
01:19:54
Speaker
using spray paint to put it on there. And so like even that is just kind of fun. like It's this great image that brings you right into it. You know what it's going to be. And you know look, Night of the Living Dead is a pretty serious movie. And it deals it deals actually with very pretty serious. it's very Exactly. And it deals with you know very serious you know motifs as it talks about racism and and a lot of other things. This is a movie that just doesn't do that. Like like you said, it does have a lot of heart.
01:20:20
Speaker
but it really eschews any of like the original aspirations of George Romero. It becomes something very, very different. um And I think that's kind of fun. like i I think that you can like Night of the Living Dead and you can like return to the Living Dead very easily together. you don't have These don't have to be in opposition to each other at all.
01:20:38
Speaker
No, I mean, they're two different, two different, two very different things. Yeah. Um, something that I do know just from watching things online and and kind of knowing a little bit about the history of this movie is that, so I was really thrown off by the corpse zombie. I don't know. Um, or not the corpse, the, yeah, the one that was in like the, the refrigerator, you know, yeah, sure, sure, sure. When he comes out and it looks like kind of just like a, um,
01:21:03
Speaker
I don't I don't know. It kind of just looks like a weird Martian because he's like weirdly colored like green. Yeah, totally. And it's and it's a weird departure from the rest of the the effects. And I did learn that the person that was um doing those ah effects was fired because he ah because of that zombie. No way, really. They brought in a new effects team for the rest of the movie.
01:21:30
Speaker
And I can see why because that first zombie, the ah the morgue zombie, if you will, looks insane in comparison to the rest of the movie, which gets ah zombies like Tar Man, which is the one that's down in the basement and ah even like the zombie that comes out of the ah grave twice in the movie to do that. Do you want a pie?
01:21:56
Speaker
um those I mean, those effects are really good. And you mentioned the upper torso zombie, which is like, you kind of already alluded to it, but it's one of those moments in the film where I'm like, what the fuck am I watching? This is so sad. Like and the other part that of the movie, and it's around the same time in the movie that made me just really be sad was when, um, uh, Freddy is talking about like how his muscles hurt and like how it he's in so much pain and like his girlfriend is like, ah you know, over him and she's trying to like get him to move and he's in so much pain and then they flip him over and he has like blood pooling on the, on the back of his back.
01:22:43
Speaker
And it's that it it's such like a serious moment in such a goofy movie. And then it's followed up by what you were talking about with the torso zombie that where she's talking about how how it's so much pain to be dead. And I was just like, what ah what is happening? Because I thought I was watching like a crazy fun movie. And this is making me think about things that I don't want to think about. And it's it's a much more deeper than I ever wanted, but it it does it works. I don't know. It makes the movie work for me. You know what I mean? It makes it. It makes it more than just a party movie. You know, I totally agree. and I think speaking of partying, it it is really funny how they use the sort of like the classic trope of like bored, punky teenagers in this. Yeah. Who like just.
01:23:29
Speaker
Like, whenever you see this kind of thing in a movie, and usually from this era, it's just like a group of teenagers. They're all dressed really funky and all very, very different from each other. I mean, the man's name is suicide for God's sake. Right. And like, their one goal is just to party. Like, the goal isn't even to like be friends with each other or whatever.
01:23:52
Speaker
The goal is just to party in one way or another. And that is what they talk about over and over and over again. Well, I think there's this movie. It's so funny. There's even the one part where the, you know, um the the boy and girl who are surviving, quote unquote, because nobody survives, but um that they're talking and she in he kind of is just like, hey, you want to fuck? And she's like, I never I never really liked you. Like, I don't know. Like, and no, thanks. Oh, you mean the guy who's like also probably gay, by the way, in that outfit, that one? Yes. the one that's the more preppy punks. Totally. and Like, whenever you see a preppy like that, it's like coded for gay. Do you know what I mean? Like, come on.
01:24:29
Speaker
Yeah, I do have to call out ah one thing in the movie is that I was I i want the soundtrack because I thought logic is music. the whole um All the music and the score was was fantastic. I actually I actually wrote I wrote it in my my my final takeaway for this is that like the music almost made me feel a little bit like Rocky Horror. And like it's not really the same style. I get that. But like the way that it's done in the movie just has that same kind of feeling to it.
01:24:59
Speaker
And I think that that that was really cool. And I do have to call out Linnea Quigley trash. Of course. Favorite character in this movie because I love when suicide is having like this very like interpersonal moment about yeah talking about like how nobody understands them and like how he he doesn't dress just like this just for fun like it's a it's his life like he's that he's very he's being very introspective yeah and she's just like basically like humping his leg and saying like I like like I like it spooky
01:25:33
Speaker
Oh, my God. There's another part with trash where it's at the very beginning of the movie and it's a very blink and you'll miss it moment. But they're having like a conversation as they walk to the car and the one guy, um spider, he's like, oh, he's talking about like the police and like how they don't like they don't want to go to a place where the police will be because he doesn't want to he be sure. I don't want to die tonight. That's what he says about the police. And then And then trash goes, I love death. Have you ever thought about how you're going to die? Well, and that's a very interesting part of the movie because she predicts her own death. Like she literally says, like, my worst fear is that I'm alone and naked and that all these men come and tear me apart, which is, it's not really what happens, but like, because it's funny.
01:26:28
Speaker
It's funny because when she's reanimated, she's reanimated completely perfect. She's like, I don't really
80s Film Censorship and Endings
01:26:34
Speaker
understand that part of it, but we'll let it go because it's 80s. Get the lights on over here. as She's taking off her clothes again.
01:26:40
Speaker
Yeah, what I will say about this is I do know, well, and this is not the first time that we've seen Linnea Quigley's boobs on this podcast now because Night of the Demons. She also is famously topless. um But ah what I do know about this movie is that she had to have a but to avoid the kind of censorship of the late 80s.
01:27:03
Speaker
she had to have a um plate basically put on her vagina. Like she's not completely naked. Like she has like a, not underwear, but like almost like a latex like plate over her vagina. That's interesting, isn't it? Cause they couldn't show vagina lips in the eighties apparently. but My God, Andrew, I don't ever want to hear you say vagina lips again.
01:27:26
Speaker
Listen, they're a real thing. there It's the human body. I know, I know. Look, we need them and and we and we we we respect them. We do. And we came from them. so We did. Yes, it is very true. And so that was by them. um But anyway, like, ah listen, we could go on and on about this movie. I do want to talk a little bit about the end. Please.
01:27:47
Speaker
I like listen, I'm kind of a weird purist about like needing to know like what happens at the end of a movie. And this is one of those movies that you don't really get a good answer. Like I distinctly remember when we watched Body Snatchers from the mid 90s. It's even in our opening credits. sure And that movie also has kind of an ambiguous ending.
01:28:11
Speaker
And I'm just like always torn on how I feel about these kind of ambiguous endings, because at the end of the Return of the Living Dead, you know, we kind of get the idea that they're just going to blow up Louisville, or they're at least going to blow up like you. havey um Or they're at least going to blow up the part of Louisville that they're in at at the moment, because we get like a miniature And I don't even want to talk about that fucking army guy because that part of the movie I don't really care about. He's such a fucking asshole. Well, he's such a fucking asshole. His his wife come like has a a complete dinner for him and she goes, oh, hello, dear, how was your day? And he goes, oh, usual awful shit. And then she's like, oh, I made your favorite lamb chops. And he goes,
01:28:54
Speaker
Uh, had those for lunch and I'm just like, this guy's a fucker. Yeah. And like, so the fact that he gets like the final say and like all these characters kind of like, quote unquote, death, uh, and made me, it made this. Okay. So, uh, the score that I will give it.
01:29:11
Speaker
it It came down from where it could have been. OK. Because I think the ending is just a little bit of a cop out. Well, tell me, what was your score? So here, if I get the 13th horror podcast, we judge on a seven stripe score for the seven stripes, the gay old rainbow. I'm going to give Return of the Living Dead a five. OK. I would have given it a five and a half if it were for like kind of the ambiguous ending. But I also said this is a mix of tones, which usually doesn't work for me. But in this case, it did.
01:29:39
Speaker
I ah especially like our spooky cast of punks. Justice for trash. I also gave it a five and I said this motherfucker is just plain weird as hell. It's wild how they all just reimagine the universe of Night of the Living Dead and it almost feels like rocky horror in some parts. You can also see the influence it's had on other horror comedies. I think it's a real little strange fucking gem. So how do you feel about the ending?
01:30:09
Speaker
Uh, I mean, if I'm being honest, I don't really feel any way, any way about it. I was just like, Oh, that's the ending. Okay. Um, I just felt like there were so many characters left that I wanted to know what happened to them. And then I get that. It makes sense. Like I think, and like, I think maybe for me, I'm usually okay with more ambiguous endings than you are. That's just like, usually how, how you and I kind of, you know, divide stuff up just by style. So for me, I honestly was okay with it, but I i get for you why it wasn't maybe what you wanted.
01:30:38
Speaker
Yeah, and I do have to say one of my favorite things about this movie and one of my favorite parts of this movie is where the tar man is feasting on suicides brains. Yeah. And then they throw the the ah paint can at him, I think, or can or whatever. And he turns to spider and the rest of the cast and he's going brains. burn And then he turns the cat, he turns the rest of the cast and he goes, More brains. Yes. Also, Freddie was cute. So I'll just put that out there. I thought he was really cute. Well, you can watch Friday, the 13th part six. I think. And wait, five and six seven. He's he's in a couple of them for more of Tom Matthews. Nice. Well, folks, that does it for Return of the Living Dead. Hang out for a moment. We'll be right back with our second film of the episode, The Grave Dancers.
01:31:38
Speaker
It started with noises, bumping, scratching. A died in a car accident. We saw each other at the funeral. You didn't tell me you went to a funeral, Mr. Vance.
01:31:52
Speaker
I think we should tell him. Tell us what. We also sort of danced on some graves. Wait, you danced on graves?
01:32:03
Speaker
I'm not sure if you are aware of the possible ramifications. It's called burial desecration. This is the spot. Are you sure? it This area is designated for the city's murderers, the rapists. I'm afraid I'm in trouble.
01:32:15
Speaker
are What we have found sheds some light on your experience. This is Dennis? Born October 5th, 1948. Dennis was a quiet, sickly child with an unfortunate affinity for fire. He started the blaze, which accidentally burned down his house.
01:32:35
Speaker
that air Emma Westbrook. In 1923, she began an affair with a married man. She broke into his house and killed his wife. um um Kira, the grave you danced on had William Langer. Say them as a case of self-intelligible torture.
01:32:57
Speaker
The curse last one more. The bastard's getting stronger. They are all getting stronger.
01:33:08
Speaker
Listen, everyone in Return of the Living Dead wanted a party, but these people wanna dance. Maddie, tell us all about grave dancers. Unrest in peace. I'm sorry. That's so stupid, unrest in peace. um After a night of drunken exploits, Alison, Harris, and Kira are chased and terrorized by the ghosts of a child pyromaniac an axe murderer, and a rapist. The Grave Dancers was directed by Mike Mendez, written by Brad Keane and Chris Skinner, produced by Code Entertainment and distributed by After Dark Films. Harris is played by Dominic Purcell. Allison is played by Claire Kramer.
01:33:57
Speaker
Kira, played by Josie Maran or Marin or something. c Sid, played by Marcus Thomas. Vincent, played by Chucky Carrillo. And Francis was played by Megane Perry. And I think it really is Megane, I'll be honest. um It's rated R. It's 95 minutes long, made in the Grand Ole USA, released July 15th, 2006, filmed in North Carolina. And I could not find any budget info for this. Sorry, folks.
01:34:24
Speaker
um So the grave dancers, this was definitely my first watch of it. Andrew, I don't think it was for you though, so tell me all about your feelings about the grave dancers. Yes. So there was a period of time in the mid aughts where we had something called the after dark film festival. yeah And it was ah housed in AMC's across the US and it was called the eight films to die for. I think it went on for three years, if I remember correctly, but the grave dancers was part of the first year.
01:34:58
Speaker
And I was weirdly obsessed with this little sect of horror yeah at the time. um Keep in mind, this is when I was like probably my third year of college. So um just kind of a time of figuring out who you were and like what you liked and stuff. So like this was kind of my sect of horror. So i I searched out these eight films to die for.
01:35:20
Speaker
And the grave dancers, I remember being one of my favorites. Wow. um And it just it was of a time, I will say that. Sure. um But what drew me back to it when we were talking about graveyards are terrifying is I remember that.
01:35:37
Speaker
the ghosts in this movie really freaked me out. And listen, they do stand up for me. I think the ghosts are actually pretty creepy. um The overall movie we can talk about when we get into it, but like overall I think I was a little a little underwhelmed, but I still liked watching the movie. I think when When it's talking about with us where we've watched so many horror movies, especially for the show and especially with a like an eye on having to review the movie, I do have to give it a little bit of shit because course there there there are a couple of things that don't make a whole lot of sense, you know you know probably the first 30 minutes of the movie and maybe the last five. but But overall, I still had a good time watching it. What about you?
01:36:23
Speaker
um Yeah, so like I think a few things about this. ah First off, it it was the first time that I'm watching this movie from 2006. And so you know it's sort of for me, it's sort of impossible to shake the 2006-ness of it, because it just is a little bit dated, even though that's not that long ago, to be fair. um And so you know there's there's that part of it.
01:36:50
Speaker
And there's a a script that i don't think is really the best if i'm being honest the writing is not that great. There's some acting in here that it just doesn't hit me right and um you know what i agree with you that like the ghost stuff is actually pretty good.
01:37:06
Speaker
But at the end of the day, like the basic idea of the movie is not bad. Like this, frankly, should be a movie that really is pretty good, to be honest. Like this, it's a great idea for a movie. It's a great idea for like a haunting, for like a haunting that persists, a haunting that goes after specific people as sort of like a curse. And I think that that is something really neat. That's always a good basis to movies. And this one could have been really cool because of it.
01:37:33
Speaker
I just think it kind of gets lost somewhere in there. And i think I think a good deal of that, if I'm being honest, is just the writing. I think like even bad actors can do some good stuff with the writing, right? But even like at the very core of what happens in this movie, which is this group of people break into a graveyard after a funeral and they go to these graves and they find this black envelope and they open it up and they find a poem. Like the the poem, which which is actually a spell.
01:38:00
Speaker
And just that is also kind of, it's just a little bit cheesy if I'm being honest. Well, we don't ever really learn why the caretaker is kind of quote doing that on it. So I don't know. There's something missing there. You know, I don't know. I just, I kind of feel like the, even just like the way that like what's his face says it out loud and then, and then these things happen.
01:38:23
Speaker
was just a little bit like yeah that little be cringe for me. like I think if if this movie could be remade now, totally rebooted, I think we might have something really good to work with here, to be honest. I just think that this this particular iteration of it is not quite up my alley, to be honest. Well, it doesn't help that we cast, sorry, sorry, sorry, sorry, Dominic Purcell in our lead role because he has all the charisma as a bag of dead cats.
01:38:50
Speaker
like This guy has nothing going on behind the eyes. Like, I'm so sorry. um Listen, I think Claire Kramer kind of um Claire Kramer and how did you pronounce her name? McGahn? I think it's McGahn because that is the way that that is the way that it's spelled. So like I could be wrong. Good to be Megan. But I don't know. There you go.
01:39:13
Speaker
I think that those two, along with Josie Moran, who plays Kira kind of are the anchor that kind of like holds me in the movie because I think all of their performances are good. I think all the men in this movie are odd. They're just oddly cast like odd is a great word for it. Andrew truly.
01:39:31
Speaker
Like Harris played by Dominic Purcell, like I said, shows no emotion throughout the entire movie. um Sid plays kind of a weirdly like, I don't know if you want me to think he's a drug addict or if you want me to think he's like kind of a low life or like, a but they just never like really commit to like what his character is. And then we have Vincent, whose accent changes no more than four times in the movie. Well, but also like Vincent it like Chucky Carrillo is I don't know. He's not like a legendary actor or anything, but he's in stuff. He's in a lot of fucking stuff, man. And he's he's a Turkish born French actor and like he's been in some heavy hitters, dude. And so like it is that was a very strange casting choice, like very strange casting choice that does not make a lot of sense.
01:40:27
Speaker
And like, i I understand that he's Turkish French, but like he overplays that French accent and that first scene so much. Like what is going on from Madison College? Like, come on. if yeah That is just it's a little bit much.
01:40:43
Speaker
Um, listen, I want to talk a little bit about the effects because I do think the effects are pretty good in this movie, apart from maybe some choices in the last five minutes or so. Fair enough. um Because ah those those faces of those ghosts are great. They live in my brain. Yeah.
01:41:02
Speaker
That part, so there's a part early on in the movie where Claire Kramer's character, Allison, wakes up in the middle of the night and she hears in in the room with her, he's supposed to love me, he's supposed to love me, he's supposed to love me, he's supposed to love me. And then you get a glimpse just a glimpse of that of that ghost kind of coming after her.
01:41:25
Speaker
And then when it it shows up later in the movie, really with the judge, which is Kira's ah grave dancer, if you will, um with him like in that kind of torture chamber, those ghost effects, those are creepy. Yeah. Those like extra smiley skeleton type faces. Like I got to give it to whoever did the character work on this movie is those look good. Got to say.
01:41:53
Speaker
yeah i mean and And that's the thing is like that it's it this movie is not completely trash. That that is definitely not what I'm trying to say. ah like i just I just think that there there are parts of it that that just kind of can't be salvaged. well and like the the the other The other part of it though that I'll definitely you know concede is that like, look, 2006, Andrew, when you first watched this, like especially when you were you know however old you were, way way younger than now, right?
01:42:18
Speaker
like This would have been a fun thing to watch, especially in like the context of a film festival. So like you know eight films to die for. If I was watching this as one of eight different things that I was watching, I think I probably would like it better, to be honest. I think it would just be part of the whole mystique of the moment. right But watching it as a standalone feature film, I think that's that's where it starts to break down for me.
01:42:41
Speaker
Well, yeah. And, and watching it from a critical eye this time, there was a couple of things that I was like, what are you doing? Like the amount of establishing shots in this movie, so many, like we know you're at the house. Like we we get it. Like, you don't have to show the outside of the house every time. It's a cute little house. You know what I mean? Like I could live in that house. Cute little thing. It drives me crazy in movies when living rooms don't have TVs and i don't definitely did not have a TV.
01:43:10
Speaker
like it drives me absolutely bonkers like i'm sorry every red-blooded american in 2006 had a tv in their living room here like air like what is the other point of the living room well i not you know actually well while talking about that um well talking about that house like in general the relationship between those two what are their names harris and Allison and Allison. Right. Harrison Allison. um What a shitty relationship to. They don't have one. like Like it doesn't make any sense. Like no wonder he's cheating on her and no wonder she doesn't know because like they don't like each other at all. It's very, very strange.
01:43:50
Speaker
Well, and like, and this is what I mean about like the first like 30 minutes or so of the movie. Like we get like and the establishment of, well, first of all, let's talk about the cold open that doesn't make any sense at all, which seeing from our trivia, it makes a lot more sense. But, um, what, who is this woman? What's going on? What's happening? Like, and also I wrote in my notes, so many 2000s movies start like this, yeah but I mean, like we don't, like, what is the point of that, to be honest?
01:44:20
Speaker
There isn't. um And then also, like, we never really get any depth about who Devin Lansing, who died, who who whose funeral they're at, like what who he was, what what they what meant, what he meant to them, like why they're warning him that he's a friend, basically, kind of thing.
01:44:41
Speaker
It doesn't make a whole lot of sense because there there's there's one flashback photo of them hanging out in a bar, but like that doesn't give any credence to like why they were friends or was there like a childhood thing? I don't know. I just feel like this is a very surface level movie to where if we just went one step further in, we would have gotten a great movie. I would agree with you on this.
01:45:04
Speaker
um but like I don't know there's just a lot of questions and then there's like these moments in the first 30 minutes or so. Where all of a sudden Allison is like hysterical for some reason because the door keeps opening when she's talking about like how voices and but we've never seen any of that.
01:45:25
Speaker
And there's just, it's very confusing. Listen, what I will say is there is a portion of this movie that I really, really like. And the portion of the movie that I really, really like is when they are held up in the ah paranormal ah psychology building, yeah like in in that house. I think all of that stuff is really, really good. I think that there is a portion of the movie that just doesn't make a whole lot of sense. But I got to give it to that portion.
01:45:52
Speaker
That i was like in it to win it like i was like ooh this is actually really good like this is and then they have the twist about how the woman paranormal investigators stole the schools and that twist and then things get bloody and crazy and gory and i really like that portion of the movie.
01:46:08
Speaker
But you gotta wade through a lot of confusing shit to get to that part. Yeah, I would agree with you. You know, what's interesting is I i look at the um as as always, I look look at the letterbox reviews because I think they they tend to be pretty accurate about about about a film in terms of like what you and I would think about it. And it's actually a pretty good spread of people across this that like.
01:46:28
Speaker
You know, I don't think anyone hates this movie is is what what I'm gonna do basically here. I mean, like there's a few people who like maybe give it one star, but most people are just kind of like in the okay range. In the middle. Yeah. and i And there are some people who really love this movie, who are just really, really into it. And like, you know, kudos to you. It's it's a thing that you're going for.
01:46:50
Speaker
Um, it looks like it may have had like another sort of like Renaissance in like June and July of this year. Actually, maybe it was released streaming or something. Cause there's a bunch of reviews on here from June because they released a, I honestly, I think this is what I watched. I think that they released like a new, like a buffered up version that must be what it is on stream pics. Yeah. Cause like from, from June and July and even like March and April, there's a bunch of different reviews on here because And even as I was, even as I was watching it, I was like, wow, this is really clear for a 2006 movie. So they must have done a rerelease of some sort. And I think Andrew, a lot of these people are your people who, cause they, they talk about seeing this in the original after dark, um, after dark marathons. So really interesting stuff. You know, usually I like to go in here and like read the really funny ones, but, um, like here, here's a funny one.
01:47:39
Speaker
ah one star from Guy Jinky who says, why would you hire a French ghost hunter? Which is pretty fucking funny. And wait, where where was the other funny one? um One and a half stars from Razor the Mad. He says, anti-grave dancing propaganda, which is pretty pretty fucking funny too. um So you mean, look, yeah, it's if you haven't seen this before, I would imagine most of you listening right now will be a lot like me and Andrew, kind of like right in the middle,
01:48:08
Speaker
You know, not finding this to be this is not, you know, this is not going to top your horror films of all time kind of list here. But like, hopefully you'll be like us and find like, you know what?
01:48:19
Speaker
If this were just done a little bit better, this movie could really fucking rock. And like, I honestly do hope that somebody takes this concept and reboots it in one way or another. And for me, makes it a lot less cheesy. Like get rid of the cheese in this movie. Like you said, Andrew, film it better. We don't need so many establishing shots. Keep the really spooky go shit. And you might have something here that's actually going to work.
01:48:43
Speaker
I did like, though, there were a couple of scenes that um of I think Emma, right? That's his that's his ghost. I think so. Who when she's like floating around that house towards the end, like when he's like running down the stairs and she kind of just like floats down with the axe. Yes. When she even when she like calls the axe kind of like Thor and she calls like the axe from outside and it swoops in and comes. There's a lot of that that I really, really like. There's another part where After Sid ah dies, um the male ah ghost hunter is outside of the door and all of a sudden he gets just fucking blown away. And I was like, whoa, where did that come from? Oh, my God.
01:49:24
Speaker
Another thing that is weird about this movie, by the way, is Francis's voice. Yeah. Yeah. Oh, my God. It's like vocal fry times a thousand. And it never stops. Andrew. Yeah. But every time that speaks, I'm like, oh, God, here we go again. I mean, she is a product of many, many 90s years, like ah what? What's what? All wrapped in the one.
01:49:48
Speaker
I only hear what I want. Lisa Loeb. Yeah, Lisa Loeb, like lookalikes. I did appreciate also that this dives a little bit into paganism because I feel like in the mid aughts after kind of like the ah the craziness that the Blair Witch brought upon us, like paganism was kind of like we're over it at this point.
01:50:12
Speaker
And so I did like that they brought like back like real paganism with like a spell and like, yeah, I don't know. There was there was parts of that that I really liked. I i really liked the whole um I this, you know, eventually we'll do 13 ghosts on this on this on this podcast. But um I liked when they delved into like the history of the ghosts and they had like their little like backstories. Like I think that that stuff is really interesting. me That stuff works.
01:50:39
Speaker
And so, like, I don't know. This is kind of a weird mixed bag of a movie for me, because there are certain parts that I really liked. But then there are parts like where there's a giant, weird Ghostbusters esque, like spectral thing chasing them at the end. And it's a giant skull. And I'm like, where did this come from? Because why is it that? That's not one of the three fucking ghosts, dude, like what's going on? Well, also, it doesn't make a whole lot of sense because all of the ghosts up to that point were corporeal or they were invisible. Like why? It's not a giant skull. Yeah, I don't. It's a weird choice. And I don't really understand why they did it. But like um I just think that there is a couple different ideas in this movie that work really well. And then it's kind of surrounded by a bad script that doesn't quite work as well. So I agree.
01:51:31
Speaker
Andrew, let me tell you what I rated this film. I gave it an average score of three and a half and I said, It's a story that could really be good, but it gets mired by cheese and with writing that just pales over and over again. This one takes a silly route too often. And it's a shame because the ghost work stuff is really pretty good. Yeah. I'm going to give it a four. I think it's a little better than average. Yeah. And I said, there's a glimmer of a fantastic movie in here. However, stilted performances and just weird edit leap keeps this just above average. Cool, dude.
01:52:07
Speaker
Well that does it for our films of the episode folks. Stay tuned and we'll be right back to close out the episode. Shante you stay. Shante you stay. Shante you stay. Shante you stay. And folks that was episode 129 and thank you for being with us here on Friday at the 13th Horror Podcast. ah But before we go, we close out the show every time with a silly little game and this game will be one that we play pretty often.
01:52:38
Speaker
it is called hottie at the episode it's just what it sounds like it's where andrew and i just decide who's the hot one that's pretty much it so andrew tell us from these two films who is your hottie you know this was kind of a tough one because i wanted to give it to harris dominick percel because that's kind of my type if you're enough fair enough But he has so not any charisma in that movie that I could not. Like, i I don't know. Like, he's just like such a stiff person that I just couldn't I couldn't find myself getting into it, if I'm being honest. Yeah. So who do you choose then? So then i I got to go with Freddie, who's played by Tom Matthews. I mean, who else are you going to choose? I will say that Clue Gallagher, who plays Bert,
01:53:27
Speaker
as a younger man was pretty good looking, if you look at his younger self, but he's a little too old for me in that movie. Fair enough. So I'm going to go with Freddie, played by Tom Matthews. It's probably going to be your same favorite, your same one. But yeah, well, listen, folks, in a rare convergence of two black holes, um Here we are with the same choice. This very rarely happens for us. Yes, my pick is also Freddie played by but Tom Matthews, right? Yeah, Tom Matthews. And I mean, look, he's just kind of cute. in This movie I saw, I thought it from the first one when he comes on screen and I even think it after he's dead, quite frankly. He also got his ears pierced for that movie. I mean, that that's kind of cute. Come on. I love that. You know, I'm into that.
01:54:11
Speaker
Well, Andrew, how about that? We have the same hottie of the episode. What a wonderful miracle for spooky time, Andrew. This must be a good omen for something. ah Folks, listen, thank you for joining us for this episode. As always, we really appreciate you spending your time with us. And look, if you want to deepen your support for Friday the 13th, guess what? You can in a couple of ways. You can either become a patron on Patreon or you can buy merch or you can do both. And you can do both of those things at our website. The website is www.frygay13.com slash support.
01:54:48
Speaker
Speaking of Patreon, we have two new patrons. Actually, someone joined while we were recording today, which is crazy. um One is a rejoiner, Ronnie. Thank you so much for rejoining, Ronnie. And our other one is Rosanna. Rosanna or Rosanna, you tell me. um Thank you so much for... you know nanna for pledging to our little podcast. Because like honestly, that's what keeps us going is you know money is helpful. like ah For sure, we we we need it to just like pay for things. But like honestly, the little like creation of this little environment that we have on Patreon, and now that we have the Patreon chat,
01:55:30
Speaker
has really changed the game. I don't know about you, but for me, like like hearing like from actual like patrons like on the Patreon chat has really like it just like makes me feel a little bit more connected to our listeners because like, let's be honest, social media is on the decline and it's not going. Social media is weird. I work in it too. um Yeah, no, I totally agree. It's wonderful to have a space where we can all chat together. I need to get on there more often. I'm i'm sorry, folks, I will be on there more often. um I have a thing because I work in social media, it's sometimes hard for me to get on there and like do official things. If I'm being honest, it's like a weird weird weirdness about me. um But it's wonderful. And it's wonderful to hear from you folks all the time and to um to see that you're so engaged with it and to see that this thing that Andrew and I created almost seven years ago is still bringing a lot of joy to you like it does to us. So thank you to all of our current patrons. Thank you to Ronnie and to Rosanna for being our newest patrons.
01:56:27
Speaker
And um also, too, Andrew, just a note for everybody. We say every episode. um You can't be a patron. That's fine. Go leave a review. I'm gonna leave it at that. If you don't leave a review, I'm gonna find you. Do you understand me? And it's not gonna be sexy when I find you. It's gonna be weird when I find you. And it won't be sexy weird when I find you. It's gonna be scary weird when I find you. Do you understand? Do you got that? Good.
01:56:53
Speaker
Andrew, the last thing that I would tell all of our listeners is something that we've been saying for a really long time and something that you and I still really believe in. And it is our hope that tonight all of them will get slayed.