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WTF News: We cant make this stuff up
28 Plays3 months ago
Thank God for dumb people... In news this week Darwin wins again,that don't go there, Ass water, some games you don't play with kids, Don't hit Machete with a water balloon, and so much more to make you say WTF
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Transcript
00:00:57
Speaker
Oh,
00:02:45
Speaker
There it is. What the fuck is going on everybody? Happy Wednesday. It's um three bitches. Welcome to what the fuck news. I'm click and I'm surrounded by these assholes. Jerry. shoot down na You're in a young sleepy Connor. are
00:03:13
Speaker
coolings and then there's fucking jeff What are you gonna do? What's going on everybody? Welcome to what the fuck news. Hopefully you guys are having a good week so far. and We're about to make your week just a little bit weirder. well Just a little bit worse. If not make you question existence. I wish I could make this shit up, but it's real stuff and it's in the news. And it made me say what the fuck. Probably going to make these guys say what the fuck. It's probably going to make you say what the fuck as well. And therefore we have done our jobs efficiently, effectively. We're like the Navy SEALs of the news world.
00:03:52
Speaker
Calm down there, Jesse. Quick and efficient. Get the job done. Is that your motto in sex? I learned it from you.
00:04:06
Speaker
but although All those times in the guard check. Anyhooey, if you're not already, shame on you, but you should be following us. Go ahead and check us out everywhere. We are on all the social medias, Facebook, Instagram, X, and TikTok. You can join us live throughout the week. On YouTube, Facebook, Twitch, and X, we're hanging out doing our thing live. We encourage you guys to just jump in the chatters box and partake in the show, if you will. And if you can't join us live, that's okay. Don't worry, baby birdies. We're going to feed you because you can listen to us anytime, any place, wherever you listen to podcasts at all at the nonsensical network. But you should be listening to us live or, or you can simply go to bio dot link slash nonsensical network.
00:04:56
Speaker
All those links are going to be there. You know the deal. Give us a follow. Give us a listen. And if you'd be so kind, give us a share. We greatly appreciate that. I'm probably wondering what the hell am I talking about? Network? Well, we have a few shows, you know, uh, we got men camp for men. It's a men's mental health podcast hosted by myself, Jerry Vichy and Connor. If it fits in the garage.
00:05:29
Speaker
What the fuck news this show right here it's sold to kill all insult.
00:05:36
Speaker
What the fuck news if it's, uh, in the news and it makes us say what the fuck, we're going to talk about it. clicks house of music. I'm hanging out with musicians doing interviews. I got a doozy coming up this Friday night. Make sure you guys tune in for that. I'll be hanging out with the ladies from women rock, LA jewels, Brie, busy and Marley.
00:05:57
Speaker
And then Saturdays is nonsensical nonsense. The unhinged, unapologetic, comedy-based show where we hang out, have fun, talk shit. And we throw a little monkey wrench into the game and drop the link in the chatter's box. We call it the open door challenge. We dare you. We challenge you. Whether you love us or hate us to come on up, get on screen. We just ask that you turn your camera on and you put your fingers away. Cause nobody wants to do that. and we do have some and we do have so on you see it don't worry but We do have a couple new shows in the work so we might have some new stuff coming up and might be shuffling the deck a little bit. We got some stuff going on here at the quote-unquote network. We're a network of shows, not a network of channels. As we say, um life sometimes get in the way. He is, he is.
00:06:52
Speaker
I can't even fit into a Mazda. I bet you could. I bet you could. You want to be able to put the top up. You can you can you can throw all the insults at everybody that you want but the simple fact of the matter is is you're the you drive an F 150. You're you're like the worst one. Alright, calm down. Yeah, would be careful. It can reverse at 60 miles an hour. Did you hear about that recall? Did you hear about the recall with the Ford F-150s for no reason whatsoever, no matter what? They'll just shift into reverse. That's some high quality H2O right there.
00:07:29
Speaker
yeah right welcome to what the fuck news but we should literally yeah i'm sorry that's a one fuck or but that's a what moment when you're driving sixty miles an hour down the the
00:07:58
Speaker
trust me, I do not fit in a Miata. I. Are you sure you're fat little tuna can in me? I had a. I tower from fucking police academy. Hey, it's Shaq. Shaq can get into a amount a lot of the mini Coopers, you can get in a fucking Miata. I do not. you but I hate to both your heart break it to but you're not Shaq. I had a buddy in high school who had one. And we all made fun of him and he tried to, his dam just to make it sound like it was cool. And he was like, come on, click let's go for a ride. And I swear to God and much at my head stuck out over the windshield and I was crammed in there. I don't fit in on me out of there. Not comfortable. I think they're ugly fucking piece of shit. Plus you'll never catch me. only Everyone says that about you too. Yeah.
00:08:54
Speaker
Oh, yes, I really do. I think you look more like Gabriel Iglesias, the white Gabriel Iglesias than you do. Fucking Shaq.
00:09:08
Speaker
Wow, I don't know if that's an insult or a compliment, but it's kind of both. um that like and albert I always assumed that Albert was white until the movie came out. what i on fire cart tune I have not heard that news about the F-150 either. Uh anywho, what's going on? It is what the **** We're going to jump right into the news. Um I got one here for you guys real quick. Obviously, last week was fourth of July weekend and uh you know, people have a tendency to be dumb **** with fireworks. You killed a hooker with a firework i did not however
00:09:52
Speaker
there was no hook that wasnt but However, a South Carolina dad learned a real hard lesson of fuck around and find out. He decided to, as he stressed his Uncle Sam, he decided it would be a good idea for him to stick a mortar on his head and light it. Oh shit. Calm down Cameron. The only reason I'm around is and because we know you couldn't do this. brun of Friends and family and his kids. His head blew off. Are now traumatized. So up goes the weasel because the weasel goes pop. He blew his fucking head clean off of his shoulders when the mortar exploded.
00:10:37
Speaker
Idiot. but yeah Idiot. i to That's just good product placement right there. No, you know what it is. It's called. bo What a way to go, though. Yeah. I mean, if you're going to go. Right. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. yeah
00:10:58
Speaker
Nice. Like he wasn't slow and painful. It was he was here one second and then gone the next. So yeah yeah let's be honest, he didn't feel a fucking thing. Good on you guys. That's one way to commit. oh no there's There's absolutely no way in hell that he felt anything. I mean, maybe some burning as ah the wick was yeah burning down. But you know, I've done a lot of things. How drunk was he? Let's be honest. They didn't say. It's hard to do a talk. That blows off.
00:11:28
Speaker
Yeah, I've done a lot of dumb things with fireworks in my life. Never once have I ever thought it'll be a really great idea if I stick it on my head and light it. Well, you're stuck a bottle rocket up your buddy's ass. today. Yes. I'm sorry. i at everber grumby Hello. but but but No, but it's like there there's a there's a there's a scene in in Armageddon where the guy's talking about nuking the the asteroid. He's like, if you put a a firecracker, just a little one in your hand and it goes off, you get burned. If you put your hand around the same firecracker, your life's open, your ketchup bottles forever.
00:12:09
Speaker
You just don't **** with **** fireworks, dude. It's not. No. Cam said he was drinking for four hours. So, yeah, he had a, yeah. Don't do it. I got an idea. Hold my beer. He's got a click on. He's like, hey, look at me. I'm shit I'm the champ. Watch this. yeah I'm having Chinese food. My wife's ordering it right now, Chris. What about, what about you, Jefe? What's the dinner report? china mexican ramen hoie No, the other Jeff and on the fucking podcast. Yes. You fucking jackass. I actually had meat tacos. I got a kilo of meat and chorizo and turkey. I put meat in his mouth again. It was fucking good. I still got a lot left. I got enough left for tomorrow. I have an authentic Mexican too, Jeff. You went to Taco Bell, did you? No, even more authentic. I had frozen burritos.
00:13:07
Speaker
miss it did you go to kudova
00:13:12
Speaker
You make my brain hurt. ah I was talking that that authentic mix of food talking about talking about that. my my am i coworkers, I was talking to her today and she was telling me but good news about this one deal. she's like and And I mentioned somehow the podcast brought up and the fact that I live in Mexico, And then I brought up the fact that you think real Mexican food is Taco Bell. Cause her husband's Mexican, my wife's Mexican. And she was like, I hope you smack him. I said, and I can't reach across, you know, 4,000 miles to smack him across the face every time. And I swear he doesn't just to piss me off.
00:13:56
Speaker
I don't know. just a little part of me does it official. Do it. Shut your **** mouth, mine. Those goddamn frozen burritos are are a frozen delicacy delicacy sent down from god himself. Oh, good lord. Delivered by sweet angels on right into my mouth. Fear not, shepherds. I bring to you good tidings. What is that? It's a frozen burrito. You stick it in the microwave. We don't have microwave. what's a microwave
00:14:25
Speaker
We have Mike. I love frozen burgers. It was it was a play on when Gabe when when the angels came down and told the three wise men like, don't be afraid. We bring good timing. And they brought them up. They brought them up. I have an idea. You know, I I had to wait until we actually had food. Because, you know, here in Minnesota, we're poor. You got you got to be grown. I was going to say, you better grab that rifle and go hunt a big dog.
00:14:57
Speaker
Breaking news apparently Minnesota does not have grocery stores oh No, we do. We're just being run by fucking idiots that think that you know, hey The best way to balance out this economy is make everything else more in affordable expensive What are you fucking kidding me? I've seen videos of Minnesota the moose fucking run that goddamn state Yeah o
00:15:24
Speaker
dad yeah el montta aberrito No, um i I put those ah the wings that you can usually that they're from TGI Fridays or whatever and yeah yeah little yeah the Buffalo wings those things are honestly they're fucking terrible the party appetizers that you get in the first yeah section Every once in a while. I like to get a whole bunch of those be like here's dinner tonight fuckers. uh juicy lucy burgers never had I one but they're so good unfortunately uh you know south carolina man learned a valuable lesson about explosives yeah he didn't learn shit it hit his really fucking
00:16:14
Speaker
His fucking brainstem stem was severed before he could learn anything. Well, yeah, I mean, yeah, he didn't learn nothing. He just Stopped existing if He was standing there He lit but he lit the wick standing in the middle of the street, but all the sudden st. Peter's stand in front of him like hey dumbass Yeah, well, it's like I saw a bunch of people doing stuff like uh What's it called they were lighting like bottle rockets or or fireworks underneath like ah an old car tire and shooting it 40 feet in the air. And it's like, you know, you guys aren't too bright because it's going to come back down and either land on you or the car. Well, bottle rockets go up in the air and then they explode. No, well no, they were like... The tire. Yeah, the tire. They were shooting the tire up at like 80 feet a year.
00:17:06
Speaker
You know, rim and all and I'm like, yeah, that thing kind of heavy. Yes, I just want to say this guy in South Carolina. Apparently his friends and family did not like him because nobody tried to stop him. Nobody said hey Bob. Yeah. You know, the day I wouldn't have stopped. You're like, wait, wait, wait. Let's see what happens. Somebody would have been the voice of reason. Boom. Oh, maybe not you. Because I'm like, wait, let me light it for you. b But obviously, if if if I was there and you were like, hey, look, I'm going to stick this border in my mouth and light it. You think it'll be cool. I'm like, yeah, I'll be fucking. Let me get my camera. Yeah. say Let me really grab my phone. Hang on. This is going to be great footage for the show. Hold on. on
00:17:50
Speaker
Um, that's going on Reddit. Sounds like a real Brian move right there. How about lighting some firecrackers in the garden and then throwing the lighter out of the carpet? I mean, we did like Roman candle wars where we, we shot. Yeah, but thanks that's different because the Roman candles don't explode. No, that they do. Well, now, Cameron, they're going to find a new fireworks guy. Yeah. Hey guys, evidently there was a live look at his autopsy of what he looked like. I'll, I'll quick share. Please do. ah I'm mildly afraid, buddy.
00:18:34
Speaker
yeah and um you know general his friends and Family were around and literally, I mean, his kid I think his kids were there. There were probably other kids there. I mean, Literally just watch this dude or your dad blow his head, please. help so Yeah. There it is. You better win it. You better wear a helmet. um I knew it. I knew it. but but
00:19:02
Speaker
Come on. Come on. Come on.
00:19:08
Speaker
Come on. You want me to get the one from fucking scanners or whatever where the guy's head. Yeah. yeah that one Okay. Okay. I'll get that one. the ru Zombie movie, you know, where they blow a zombie set up. But in other news, this isn't really a what the fuck news. This is more, uh, it's kind of heartbreaking, especially a dog pound nation, Clevelanders, Cleveland Browns fans, uh, hall of fame legend quarterback. but Bernie Kozar was diagnosed with Parkinson's disease. That sucks. But it seems like everybody's getting that. Yeah, we have we have some great fond memories of Bernie and in Cleveland.
00:19:55
Speaker
And that when you're playing against it for brocos as said in a room full of Pittsburgh Steelers fans and and and and former ah players, it sure was a pleasure kicking your guys' ass for nine years.
00:20:14
Speaker
Yeah. Did he do it like this? It's just, it's too bad though that, you know, he had the theory.
00:20:23
Speaker
Sorry, that was a bad form. He's like, let me sign your autograph. but i I got pretty sure it was our autograph. Really? It looks like Michael Jack or her Michael, Michael J Fox. Michael J Fox. God damn words are hard. and wow um hey somebody give chris a order i didn't know but didn you chris the border and let benit sc your head good cheek yeah what's i fuck the guy say man i mean
00:20:55
Speaker
i mean but like you even I know who Bernie goes are as I didn't realize his quarterback so like he's a famous dude It's a horrible thing I mean, do you really and honestly not expect that when you're playing for the Cleveland Browns back in the eighties? Well, when you're don CTE is the, is the main problem in your sport. Parkinson's is bound to be bound to run rampant through the fucking league, especially as it like everybody's getting Parkinson's lately. And I know you weren't around Jarvis, but the Browns were a winning organization in the eighties. So ah agreed.
00:21:35
Speaker
Kind of until they ran into John Elway and the Broncos. It's not like our organization has always been losers like Minnesota. Yeah, facts. Wait, how many times has your team went to the Super Bowl? Granted, mine's lost four times, but how many times? I was going to say, just because you go doesn't mean you win. I know that I get yelled at a lot by Not not real football fans and they just biased because of their hometown teams. I understand the Browns have never been to the Super Bowl. However, they have won eight championships. Oh, but yet the NFL ever recognizing that, you know, they do right. and It was. No, they don't. Yes, they do. No, they don't. Yes, they do. Oh, my God.
00:22:21
Speaker
Yeah, huh? No, ah you didn't. Who cares? Oh, fucking ah ever since the fucking Super Bowl, the whole NFL championship thing went out the window or else Otto Graham would still be considered a bigger legend than Tom Brady. Maybe he is. I mean, he did win seven championships. I'm just saying, maybe i think somebody else smells toast to Brian. Well, maybe also what is what does that even mean? Are you OK? He's just saying that because he's a fucking Steelers fan and they haven't done anything since this what early 2000s, we get it. What does that mean? NFL is a work. It's some people think that NFL is scripted. Oh, well, I mean. They're not doing anything to help themselves to prove that they're not. Just say.
00:23:19
Speaker
But no, that just kind of sucks. I mean, you know, Bernie is still a major staple in the Cleveland, in the Cleveland and the cleveland organization. Uh, he's still a very popular figure in Cleveland. Uh, Clevelanders love him. Cleveland Browns fans love him. The guy's had a hard life. I mean, a few years back, Oh, look, and now we're going to see Connor. kane out there Live look at someone trying to learn how to walk again.
00:23:50
Speaker
He's got a text on. And he's touching his other prosthetic. That's why your neighbor bangs your wife loser. But he was a great player. It's just, he had a head coach named Marty Schottenheimer.
00:24:10
Speaker
Well, yeah, I mean, up to, you know, up to, uh, I don't remember how long ago or when he quit drinking, but he was a rage in alcohol. Alcoholism was kicking his ass man for years. He was, ah he was a hot mess. So same with Mark Griffin. Yeah. Uh, shout out, shout out and good vibes, you know, uh, to, to Bernie and his family. Hopefully, uh, hopefully Bernie will be around for many more years. Just, uh, dealing with the, uh, I'm going to add him to the celebrity death list just in case. Well, you can't add anybody until next year. No, for next year. You know what I mean? He's just got to hold up internet issues. It's a gambit of things. It could be anything. Internet issues are mainly the number one thing. Uh, I got one. but Yeah, go ahead. I was,
00:25:06
Speaker
Our residential Hawk 2 girl has now made her very first big name appearance for i did that for um it was a Miss Dayer bikini contest. She got paid $30,000 to go fucking be a judge. Yeah, I heard about that. contest What is her 15 minutes up? Hey, like I said, right right now it's yeah but um now that I'm seeing her more and more like on TV or like on social media and in the news and stuff like that. Originally I said she was a seven. The chicks like a five on a good day. She's not attractive. She's not cute with her stupid ass accent. What?
00:25:52
Speaker
She may be. She may be Benji. She's a five on a good day. She's not cute with her stupid fake southern accent. She's not. She's from Tennessee. How is it a fake accent? And and and she it's her 15 minutes almost though. I mean, seriously, I I'm hoping so because I think we're about a month and a half, two months away from her having an only fans and sucking off some doing the hop to on some crackhead on our only fans for for a 399 a month subscription. Well, she turned down Playboy. Playboy, Playboy hit her up and they were like, we'll pay it. She's like, I'm good. So that's the line. Apparently. But being famous for. But but yeah, I've seen I read on that. no she she Yeah, but she did it as a joke, like when we say stuff like that, um like she did like ah an interview from like her porch swing and I was like. I wasn't impressed.
00:26:50
Speaker
I was just like, yeah, whatever. But I agree, you know, that Irish show isn't a thing anymore because she'd be the one that I can't stand No, I agree. I think her 15 minutes of fame need to be up. I get it. It was funny at first, but now it's fucking everywhere and it's getting it wrong. I didn't even think it was I didn't even think it was funny when I first heard it. I'm like, Welcome to social media, boys. we You know, A, we've said so much better stuff on this show. B, I've heard so much better shit on other random fucking TikToks or podcasts. And like I said, she's a five on ah on on her best day. She's a five. Yeah. She looks a little inbred. Let's be honest.
00:27:39
Speaker
I have no comment.
00:27:48
Speaker
Oh, I agree. I hope she gets a ton of money because then maybe she'll go away. It's just annoying. Supposedly, supposedly she's getting a TV deal or um an acting deal. Again, again, nothing. while this is This is the society that we live in. We make people famous for nothing. You present no skills. and the acting world or whatever, but we're going to put you on TV and we're going to put you because you say, I bet you don't even suck dick. You're probably some weird, like, I don't want to put a penis in my mouth. It's gross. ha Yeah. She's like, no, I'm saving it for when I marry us that we have a chance.
00:28:37
Speaker
if yeah that lady Could get a ah TV deal you're telling us that there's a no but it comes down to it comes down to when it first came out I'm sure you know a lot of people follow that guy's account that of interviews people and that guy's got a huge account that guy's a man got a huge account Yeah, yeah, and and it was just the right thing at the right comes down is good being a bitch. It came down to somebody shared it. Somebody else shared it. And you know, that's how viral things go. and And I get it. It was cute. It was funny, but it's run its course. well it's it's kind of It's kind of like, it's kind of like bad Barbie. Catch me outside. How about that? I was thinking the same thing. yeah very similar name is I don't care what her name is. She's still doing, she's still doing God knows what. She's still making tons of money, but she's not all up and everybody. However, did you hear about her?
00:29:28
Speaker
and the last week. Yeah. Her baby daddy caught her ass outside and beat the brakes off of her. I guess they got into a fight and he and I'm not. I'm not advocating beating on women but if somebody. a good job and Somebody buy that man a beer. She got caught up. She's gonna catch me outside. I guarantee you. He said, I caught your ass outside and but That's just the funny thing with chicks like that. They think they're all big and bad until you get them outside. And then they realize, oh, shit, I can't fight. I'm just a lot of attitude. Well, she's also like five foot two, 105 pounds soaking wet. I don't know how big her baby daddy is. Again, not advocating you know domestic violence or anything like that. But your catchphrase was catch me outside. How about that? Someone caught you outside.
00:30:24
Speaker
ah have one more story catch you outside how about that and this one is actually a united flight meltdown a passenger bit a flight attendant
00:30:41
Speaker
is that a passenger dead No. United flight 762 from Miami to New York stopped in Orlando on Tuesday evening after a passenger became aggressive and disruptive. Our flight attendants worked to deescalate the situation and protect other customers after landing in Orlando. Law enforcement met the flight and the passenger was removed. We're grateful to our team for their professionalism and for looking out for the safety of our customers and their fellow United employees. um man
00:31:13
Speaker
fucking florida Florida hey they breed them different down there let me tell you ah inbreed a differently gos you said little bit of both why did he bite her I missed it ah so the it says here um that the passenger female ah evidently got upset, screaming at other passengers while the flight crews tried to restrain her, ah even wrapping zip ties around her wrists. Well, with no hands available, the passenger takes a different tactic, biting the flight attendant's shoulder and ripping fabric from it while other employees jump to their comrades' aid.
00:31:56
Speaker
um Somebody should have just given her the peanuts she wanted. I'm sorry. If you bite me, I'm cold cocked in your ass. Oh, easily. Not even thinking about who you are. It doesn't even really say what started it. It just probably was that, hey, she didn't get served her favorite fruity Miami drink or something and just decided to go off. Night, night, going to sleep. Enjoy the rest of your flight. Agreed. I'm just saying. the The poor male flight attendant probably when she start biting on his shoulders probably like get away from me You know don't like not now that I've been an elbow to the face. Yeah, I knock her out I knock her out and then teabag her in front of the fucking captain knock her out and start undoing your pants. What is he doing? Holy shit, he's teabagging
00:32:49
Speaker
ah that's if you get pitch what are you gonna bite now but and there wake up bite your nut you know wake up and get fucking curb stampmp that's Yeah, you know what flight attendants don't get enough ah They put up a lot of shit
00:33:11
Speaker
I think all light toing have but all flight attendants should have like a fishing rod with that real flexible lens. So they can just smack you from like four feet away. All right. billing va so no so and So as you, as you get off the plane, no, everybody everybody knows who fucked up because I got a big slash. It's just big red wealth. They should have been talking shit. Yeah. now Yeah. Especially, especially nowadays, everybody, Man, everybody's got their own like weird fucking... ah gym everybody thinks they're Everybody thinks they're fucking more important than they are. Yeah.
00:33:50
Speaker
I don't know, man. It seems like there's more and more story. Like the crazy chick that... What was it? A few months back? He's not even... He's not even that guy right there! And I was like, I still want to know what the fuck she's talking about. And there's a rumor that she's not the the person they have interviewing
00:34:10
Speaker
the the person that was supposedly her is not the real person she's oh no it's a whole thing look it up they're like that's not the real girl that was doing that they have somebody that looks similar to her impersonating you know yeah you can't really tell because the the original video is like from a shitty cell phone because the uh the actual girl was locked up in area 51 somewhere because she's exposing secrets about the aliens i guess
00:34:42
Speaker
That's how they get you that'll hop to do you got another one Steven? No ah but that that is it i was you got anything Before we before we take a quick break here, all right. Well, I'm about to ruin your childhood gentlemen. um I got a little video for you Well this fact When which we're all about Oh, well, an orphanage would definitely show this. So, and we were kids. We all watched Sesame Street, right? Yeah. At least you've seen it. Well, check this out. It took me 15 years to realize there is a different Big Bird in every country. I was showing a friend Sesame Street, and he asked me why Big Bird wasn't green. It's because it's an American version. Check this out.
00:35:36
Speaker
This is Pinot. He is from the Netherlands. He speaks Dutch. This is Abelardo Montoya. He is from Mexico. He speaks Spanish. This is Takada. He is from France. He speaks French. This is really interesting. This is Caponata. She is from Spain. She also speaks Spanish.
00:36:08
Speaker
Gariboldo. This one scares me. Anyways, look at all the other ones. This is Pupa. Okay. Go ahead. Why the hell did the one from Spain look like the gobbledygooker from fucking w WWE? Well, the one from France is scary looking. so as So the wife and I were talking about this the other day. And they normally when you like the Simpsons, they don't redo the Simpsons. They dub it. You you know, if if you're watching, you know, I don't know how I met your mother, they just dub it. They don't recreate the entire show. Sesame Street, since its infancy, has always had a different show, different production per country. yeah And and like Big Bird is technically a six year old canary.
00:37:03
Speaker
And when we grew up watching Big Bird, Big Bird was also dumb child and you learned with him. And the wife and I were talking about this yesterday. She said the the Mexican one, Arbelito, he was older and he taught you like a teacher. And she said Big Bird would show up, but they were like, well, Big Bird's a fucking idiot because he's always getting lost. He doesn't know anything. And she's like, I never realized he was six years old. like the viewer. They still have Grover, they still have, you know, Bert and Ernie and all that stuff. There's a couple of different characters ah that different countries have. Like, um there's somes that some that we have that they don't, ones they have that we don't. But like your Grover, your Bert and Ernie, your
00:37:58
Speaker
Elmo, they're still the same, just dubbed, or they use a Spanish speaker, but it's like complete production per country. And I found that just blew my mind fascinating. I didn't even know. I didn't even know. I just i didn't didn't really ruin my childhood. but Yeah, I was going to say it didn't affect me none, but I didn't realize that there was different versions of Sesame Street all over the world. Right. Yeah, that's what I said. Because like if you watch How I Met Your Mother here on regular TV, it's just dubbed in Spanish. It's not like they built a whole new set and all that stuff. Kind of makes you wonder if they had like a different one for fucking Teletubbies. God, can you imagine what those shows would have been like in different countries?
00:38:44
Speaker
but But you said, you said, yeah are they still had all the, earth they still had like Elmo and all that stuff. Yeah, they have all the other characters. But Big Bird was always the the quote unquote star of Sesame Street. you know he's their their Number one guy so I guess it kind of makes sense to have different variables but like in Mexico They didn't have snuffle up against they had they had a version, but you never saw him You just saw his trunk sticking through the ah wall like this snuffle up horrifying That dude's awesome
00:39:16
Speaker
That's just terrifying. You really want to ruin your childhood, Jarvis, and she brought up Teletubbies. I don't know. Maybe you watched it growing up. Look into that shit. Look up the conspiracy theory. We don't have to go into it. Oh, I bet. You want to ruin people's childhood? Go tell them why Eeyore is fucking depressed. Every quote unquote character I want to eat the poo supposedly has a mental illness represented.
00:39:47
Speaker
but let's go Look up the the fan theory or conspiracy of Teletubbies Yeah, don't blow your fucking mind like holy shit what the hell important I Would imagine Teletubbies would be the same everywhere because them dumb bitches didn't even really talk they just made weird noises I So Benji, Wally's Wonderland or the beginning precursor to Five Nights at Freddy's? Just saying. Wally's Wonderland is so much better than Five Nights. Oh, go fuck yourself. Willy's Wonderland. You even watched either one of them? Yes, I've watched Five Nights at Freddy's, even played the game. Have you watched Wally's Wonderland or Willy's Wonderland? That's the one with Nick Cage, right? Yes, just say no i haven't yet yeah not Not yet.
00:40:40
Speaker
Yeah, but I was not saying that better than yeah you know I'm not gonna say one's better than the other so fuck no But like for example and real quick here, I just pulled up a photo and it's loading forever I don't know why it's taking so long. Here we go. These are the Mexican version. So, you know, we don't have ponto um But they got Grover, they got the Count, Big Bird showed up occasionally, Elmo, Cookie Monster, Lola, I don't think we had, and Bert and Ernie. You know, there's some other low-level characters that we didn't have, but these are Plaza Cessimo in Mexico. So, it's kind of a weird thing.
00:41:17
Speaker
And you know, the wife and I were shooting videos back and forth with each other going, well, this is the Sesame Street I grew up with. And she's like, this is the Sesame Street I grew up with. And it's it's kind of like full on sets. They didn't half ass anything. But my theory comes down to, I think it comes down to, and correct me if I'm wrong, wasn't Sesame Street like public access? yeah yeah thanks PBS yes, yes, yeah, but but it's like it's it was it's like they don't copyright shit So they they like contact me Well, you know what I mean? Like like they didn't they didn't know they didn't worry about somebody infringing on it They basically call each country and said hey, here's the shit make your own version and we'll all teach the kids together But so what you're saying in Sesame Street was actually a positive thing worldwide and
00:42:12
Speaker
ah Apparently because I watched a full episode. as Well, not a full episode. I watched clips of of Plaza sesamal here in Mexico and you know, they were teaching about triangles and stuff like that, but Billy Joel was on was on one of the episodes of fucking episode Sesame Street, Episee Street look but But like good god Connor the intros are different and oh Sorry, I said his name wrong. I just got yelled at see that home number withhood no ah Jarvis Tanya says that the telltubbies are the same in Mexico. Okay, it's just uh So it's it's it's one of those weird things See Lola and Pancho Tanya says, you know, she loved them
00:42:53
Speaker
You know and you know she grew up she grew up watching in the in the in the 90s I grew up watching in the 80s and it's it but it's that the intros it had to be like Lola had to be part of the Mexican one because oh granted it's been fucking years since I but there was a couple of characters on the US Sesame Street that I don't remember like some dude with a weird bowler hat I was gonna say my favorite my favorite ah character from the Sesame Street was Mr. Noodle, the fucking the pedophile from Elmo's World. Of course he would be. Do you know, do you know who Mr. Noodle is? Fuck no. I think that's the guy I found. Like I found a ah character I was like, I've never heard of that character. Mr. Noodle is is my favorite motherfucker. On the count was mine. I like the gal. The count was awesome.
00:43:51
Speaker
So so ah so it it's it's actually, it's it's marcu in a hundred and twenty countries more of like broadcast with with with ah more than 30 international versions and productions. And it's it's been produced by Sesame Workshop formerly known as Children's Television Workshop So it's the same company does it all over the world. So it's not like crancy's Okay, so they just set up they just set up production companies in each country I see what you did What was Sesame Street the one that was done by Jim Henson or was that the Muppets? Well, that was the Muppets
00:44:29
Speaker
my but What like if you I kept putting you know, I put in sesame Street I know they tried to make them up. It's a big deal again, but then it kind of they kind of went Back off the rails again Like I've never heard of baby bear guy smiley. I barely remember Boots the owl I don't know who that is, but they show Kermit the frog on here. I So Kermit showed up on a couple of episodes at least. But like, look up Mr. Noodle. Old and new Mr. Noodle. Oh, Bill Irving. Erwin is his name. Oh, yeah. Dude, he's kind of scary. Used to be played by Mr. Er, by Michael Jeter. Oh, it says, here you go. Here he is. That's Mr. Noodle right there, sir.
00:45:25
Speaker
Yeah, so the one on the left is the oh, yeah, I know that guy the one the one on the right is the old one That the one on the right is played by a but I know that guy Fucking but ah just so I notice just had I hear you know played by But Michael's like my bill erwin well this guy
00:45:50
Speaker
I know who that guy is. That was the guy, he was in Sister Act. He played one of the priests in Sister Act too.
00:46:00
Speaker
It's kind of interesting. But yeah, it was like, we talked about it for like three hours yesterday. the The differences kind of blew my mind. But yeah, that's the story I got. It's just kind of weird and fascinating. The original Mr. Noodle was played by
00:46:25
Speaker
Well, it's not Bill Irwin now that was the original, though. Fuck it. Who cares? Yeah, it's one of those weird things. Yeah. Connor, do you have any stories for us tonight? Michael Jeter. that That's who that's what his name is. Michael Jeter. I i knew it. I already said it once. Oh, yeah. So.
00:46:47
Speaker
Shut the fuck up, you stupid little prick. God, you're such a fan. Whoa. What do I do? I don't know. I don't know. I'm stoned, and I feel like yelling at Chris. That was directed toward Glick. Anyway, we're going to take a real quick break. Yeah, I was going to say, if you want to take a real quick break, we'll take a quick break. Hey, Glick, why don't you take a real quick break, and then we can come back. OK. Hey, Connor, why don't you take a real quick break? Take us to break, Connor. Yeah, go ahead, tough guy. All right.
00:47:23
Speaker
It's it's really not that hard Well, thanks for listening. We are gonna take a real quick break. Where what do we want to listen to today? Should their Glick Glickeroosky you surprise I will happily pick it got got your big boy pants on tonight and yeah there So follow us on all of our social media platforms. Facebook, Twitter or formerly known as Twitter X now. what's We're just going to break, Connor. We're not countt ending the show. maybe yeah i't go but You know what? Suck a big fat cock there. jerovi yeahvi she's fucking the bigga fat cock We're going to listen to the ACDC cover of Back in Black. We'll see you after a break.
00:52:04
Speaker
Yeah, so that was weird. I don't know why, but everybody was saying in the chat that there was no audio on that video.
00:52:14
Speaker
I don't know. I was working on it. Yeah, so that was weird. I don't know why. Everybody was saying that the chat was no audio. I was trying to work on it. Steven doesn't pick the music for the show, so that would be that big Sasquatch there. No, I'm sorry. I blame Steven. He's the one that hit button.
00:52:34
Speaker
yeah It's never done that for me, buddy. It's never done that to Glick. It's it's got to be you, buddy. Actually, that's not true. ah There was actually a show where the music actually did not play. Really? I don't know why, because I like i know I heard it through the headphones. Yeah, I could hear it. Yeah, so it was actually good. I can't remember the name of the band. um
00:53:04
Speaker
It is Iron Cross, is the Iron Cross that's saying that, ICDC. They're an excellent band. That chick is actually a former gymnast from Romania or some shit. Like, like medalist in the Olympics. Calm down, Blasian. If anything, I'm ready. and Trying to say I'm Cory and Trevor from fucking trailer park boys. I've never seen Where are you able to hear it Tanya could you hear that polar lever crunk? Yeah, she that's coming through
00:53:52
Speaker
It was just that one song. We'll have to try another song later to test it. um
00:53:59
Speaker
I can't get into it. It's just, uh. I think for some reason, I think for some reason it swapped brands right before the music was played. And then it came back over to this brand. So it cut, them it cut the sound. It's happened before. where we went and you jumped brands and then it's come back. so
00:54:32
Speaker
said you're the utility wow Wow. Wow. That hurts. Who's the new Tony? Why? Cause I'm eating. I'm like him who would fucking sorry. You're eating on on the show. Connor was just eating on the show. Yeah. yeah cripple so we can't pick never Yeah. We, we, we let that rule go. yeah election
00:55:01
Speaker
Anyways, welcome back to what the fuck news everybody. Oh man. Let's get into some good stories. We got Jeff in the building. Charlie. She's here. Connor was here. Lord only only knows what where he's at or what he's doing at this present moment in time. we have to wait wait before you continue i have to let the people listening know uh because this is this once again somebody asked me but is connor really crippled no he is not but he's close someone really asked that question my wife just is he really crippled
00:55:48
Speaker
The power is actually really crippled and he has no legs. He has prosthetic legs. Stop lying to people. Just tell them the god damn truth. He's **** crippled. He has no legs. Yeah. So, his brain don't **** work. That's why we call him Sleep Econ. The Bluetooth device is connected us successfully. The Bluetooth
00:56:07
Speaker
That's his legs connecting. So welcome back to everybody. It's a bit of a shit show tonight. We'll see if I can save it, correct this, correct this ship anyways. And then maybe when Connor comes back, if he comes back, if he, he might not even know where he's at at this point, he just wanders off sometimes on the stairs, please send help. Yeah, he he just wanders. But welcome back to what the fuck news. Jeremy, she's in the building. Jeff was in the building. Connor was in the building. I'm here. I'm Glick. You guys know that. Anyways, we'll get back into the news stories. We'd like to talk about news that makes us say what the fuck. um You would think after so many episodes, these guys would learn something. But don't worry. Daddy's here. Daddy's here to fix everything. Bitch, please. Learn how to do a goddamn what the fuck.
00:57:00
Speaker
Um, I guess, uh, fourth, of fourth of July, not only do we have dear old dad taking a mortar to his head, but, uh, we all know probably one of the most bad-ass actors, uh, former, uh, convict, you know, got his career started by coincidence. He was wandering around a movie set and the and the director was like, he looks scary. We should hire him. And we all know him and love him. You know, I'm from, From Dust to Dawn, Machete. Any other movie, yeah get badass Danny Trejo over the fourth of July weekend was in a parade. I got hit with a water balloon. You know, he probably loved it. That is like 72 year old Danny Trejo. I got hit with a water balloon. No, he jumps out of the car. He's riding in and goes and gets into a fight with center blue.
00:58:04
Speaker
color
00:58:07
Speaker
thankfully some of Danny, Danny's friends were with him and they were thinking a little bit more clear and split up the fight while afterwards, Danny said that the water balloon thrown at him. Why?
00:58:22
Speaker
because it was a racially motivated attack because. um you fucking and brave ah No, no, no, no, I refuse to believe that machete would go down that road, refuse to believe it. That's the report and it's just like really. you're underly How many other water, if there was only one water balloon and A, if that's the new tactics of the racist, is water balloons? I'm in. Let's have a race war. Because that sounds like it. Can somebody group single me out when it's 100 degrees out and be like, oh shit. We don't like your squadrons. We don't like your kind. And hit me with a water balloon because that would feel refreshing.
00:59:04
Speaker
What what's the next thing for fucking racially motivated things they come up with those fucking fans that spray the water on you Well, yeah, have you ever seen the video of Tom Cruise? He said he's on the red carpet and he's this joke podcaster asking questions and then squirts it like the microphone has a water fountain and sports him and Tom Cruise literally just Dresses him out. Why would you do that? And she was like, what the fuck? Shut up, bro. It was a joke. Calm down. Stop taking yourself. So there's energy does have a fact. yeah go up or Yeah, I get it. But at the end of the day, Danny Trejo, the Billy Badass, like the one guy, you're like, he'll be able to take a joke. Evidently not.
00:59:51
Speaker
I mean, was the guy heard screaming, go back to Mexico, Mexico, you filthy Mexican? And it was like, bang, and hit him in the back with a water balloon? Why is it going to be in the back? Like he was running away? andly Because then his back would be wet. Aw. Aw. The pond would pick a pocket, sir.
01:00:20
Speaker
I'm just saying like really it's a water balloon and it again, if that's the new racial tactic for racial attacks, please sign me up to be discriminated against and feel free to go all day. Yeah, if it's 100 degrees outside, I will be the attack of all the races. Why you're at it? Maybe if you don't like my kind, bring me a steak and potato. That would really hurt my feelings.
01:00:47
Speaker
We hate you cracker. Enjoy your steak. Medium rare. your son of a i miss fire you
01:00:56
Speaker
i Well, however, yeah it was I was going to get to that point too. However, Danny did have, Danny is an avid dog lover. We all know that. And for as big and often, well, he's not very, it's scary as he is. He loves chihuahuas and he had this little chihuahua for like 13 years and he had, and it died, right? Be a couple of days before the parade or whatever. So I don't think that excuses your actions. Yeah, that's like, that's like, you know, my wife left me. I'm going to stab you in the face because you looked at me. You know, that has nothing to do with the guy that threw the water balloon, you know?
01:01:34
Speaker
i mean jeff did one time become a part-time chiropractor um
01:01:42
Speaker
was racialally motivat yeah dude um and things go loving this word let but yeah but then let's Let's hope for the best. That doesn't excuse him for saying something stupid because someone threw a water balloon. Yeah, but once again, here's the thing. By doing that, by coming out with the um racially motivated attack, he gets away with it. Yeah. Because like, oh, he's the victim. So I get that. Later comes out, it was another Mexican that threw the water balloon at him. It was in California.
01:02:22
Speaker
Chances are facts and in other and other ah so racial news. Oh God. I'm trying to talk about this because this seems a little illegal and kind of entrapment-ish, but a up in uh up in Detroit. A uh man is uh suing a company for racial discrimination. Oh my god. like So, I uh a black man filed an employment discrimination lawsuit against the hotel in Detroit, Michigan alleging that the hotel only offered him a job interview after he changed his name on his resume. Isn't that falsification? Yeah. Yeah. That's that. I mean, that's that's kind of once again You're you're playing the victim, but you did something wrong. Yeah, according to the lawsuit attained by CNN. The White Jackson filed a lawsuit against Shenola Hotel on July 3rd, alleging he was denied a job he applied as the White Jackson, but later offered an interview. An interview when he changed his name to John Dabrowski. I'm not mad at the name,
01:03:47
Speaker
ah what he went wait wait What's his real name? Yeah, White Jackson. Okay, once again, does not sound like a white dude. This this just reeks of the Dave Chappelle one where he's the blind KKK member. It's like Barry White was not a white dude to say. So I mean, I'm just saying like, would you would you fill out a and job application? You have to be truthful, right? Like that. Well, I don't think you can get in trouble for it unless you get hired. How much how much is he suing for? If you say.
01:04:34
Speaker
say If this guy's asking for a million, they they show up for a million. Just wait, he's a Detroit. Yeah. yeah So technically, he is a minority.
01:04:48
Speaker
in detroit why di youre hitting it a black guy girl and so Oh, I thought he's a white dude. No, no, no, no. Yeah. It doesn't say how much he's asking for the good lord, Jeff. Well, you know, there's a whole **** TV show about the Johnsons and they're white and they live next door to the Johnsons who are black. You know, I'm just saying. yeah
01:05:14
Speaker
ah Yeah. But it's like at the end of the day, You didn't get the job, dude. You probably fucking come back. You can't work anyways. Like, Connor, I'm not going to have him. I'm not going to hire him to run marathons.
01:05:30
Speaker
is it Is that racially motivated? No, it's just facts. This is a cripple and and wheelchair. So so technically so check this out. So take this out because I'm curious about it because so technically lying on a job invitation is generally not a criminal offense. There you go. So so um but But it can depend on the circumstances. Some factors that can affect the consequences of lying on a job application include intentionally lying on a job application. It's like entrapment. Whether the lie was intentional or careless, harm if the employee or others were harmed as a result of the lie, they're going to be harmed financially.
01:06:14
Speaker
Yeah. Okay. Okay. I'll give you that. ah Company and state policies, the policies of the company and state where the job is located. So, I mean, depending on about where you are, it varies. So, and it also says in some cases, lying on a job application could be considered fraud or misrepresentation, which are crimes, for example, if an applicant lies about having a college degree or other educational credentials. Understood. Uh, they could, and some states fraud can be considered a misdemeanor, blah, blah, blah. Well, cause like we've all, we've all had those, those sweepstakes fill outs that we fill out as Seymour butts. And yeah when it says sex, yes, please. You know, because like, if you do that, you don't want the job in the first place. Other, other legal issues, uh, that could arise from line on job, uh, civil liability and employer could sue for fraud if they were, uh,
01:07:07
Speaker
relied on the lies with hiring or determined compensation, ah loss of license and certifications, certifications. ah So I mean, false false identity, lying about your name, worth work authorization status, or background check often violates the law. So lying about your name often violates the law. for that What are you in jail for? I relied on a job application.
01:07:38
Speaker
Yeah. Well, and that's the thing. If you're lying on your application, you're really trying to get the job. It sounds like he was trying to attract them. I have yeah i i've never lied on a job application, but I mean, completely changing your name. that most i mean it sounds It sounds like I'm trying to play a victim here. yeah it sounds like entrapman It sounds like somebody needed attention and he's getting the attention that he wanted. Mommy and daddy didn't love him enough. I don't know. Maybe his daddy went out for milk and never came back 30 years later, you know, whatever the case may be. Uh, but yeah, I think this is short i mean this could go either way. Yeah. He could, he could end up owing the company yeah money. Like they could counter Sue because he lied on an application.
01:08:33
Speaker
once again, if, if like, well, however, the other side of that same coin is the, the story from liar, liar, the the guy breaks into the house and hurts himself, breaking into the house and then sues the hormone and gets happen real life. Yeah. So it's, it's, it's one of those things. It's a double, it's, it's a double-edged sword. I mean, at the end of the day, uh, Maybe, maybe the reason, and as I said, the guy applied for several positions. It doesn't say if they interviewed him for one of those positions and he just wasn't qualified. Well, and that's the thing. And that's why they were like, and that's why they were just trucking and going, or he's, or, or they just know him and knew that, that he, that he,
01:09:22
Speaker
they didn't you know there's so many variables in this situation like like which which one came first is real name application or the fake damn application because if I interview you as Chris Glick and then you come back as Sasquatch Jones and I'm like I recognize this motherfucker he didn't and so they said he didn't get interviewed when he filled out the application with Dwight Jackson. So then he filled out the application with a fake name and he got the interview. Sorry. White Jackson sounds like fake name, buddy. I mean, Dwight Jackson, you can go either way. Oh, Dwight. I thought you said white. No, Dwight. Oh, Dwight. OK. I mean, you can honestly go either way with that. But yeah, it's one of those things where we're not we're not getting the full story at the end of the day. We're yeah but not getting the whole story.
01:10:16
Speaker
They'll probably settle out of court. Probably like here's 50 bucks or we'll give you a janitorial gig. In other in other news, Florida. Little bit of a parent a little bit of parenting device here. Don't take parenting advice first and foremost for Michael Jackson. They told a beach a man was arrested. Bingling his two year old over a balcony.
01:10:48
Speaker
And fumbling the baby. and Instead of this guy. Whoa, whoa, whoa, wait, Steven. He dropped. He dropped the baby. Two stories. The baby's fine. Well, I mean, he got some bumps and bruises and what like probably going to need therapy, you know, down the road. But fortunately, the baby's fine. but yeah did he did he bounce off a canvas like indiana jones but sco are made Yeah, that's yeah, I agreed like I I can't see myself doing that like hey everybody look at my baby I'm holding it two stories because I'm afraid to pick up a child a foot off the ground because what her fingers
01:11:34
Speaker
But what are you going to say, Steven? I just because I had I had to emphasize. Can we not try this, man? Can we just go to execution? Well, OK, I get it. Because like, no, you're going to dangle your child over the fucking balcony. And no, but we've all we've all been on like, you know, you go to a rest area like over the Grand Canyon, they got like a railing. You set your kid on there. Like you could have your kids sit on it so they can see. It could have been something like that. I'm gonna set him, and then you, oh, oh shit. Billy! Say, somebody bring him to my kid. You know, that could have happened. Yeah, yeah like Benji said, thank goodness the kid is okay. Agreed. You know, what is it it could have been a bit of butterfingers as he's trying to set the kid on the balcony ledge. But once again, I am always afraid, like, I'm afraid to set my kids on my,
01:12:31
Speaker
shoulders because they they they tend to do this and lean back and you're like, hey, I don't have the center of gravity anymore. So yeah. yeah Do you have more to the story than this? Like did the guy do an interview or something like my bad or?
01:12:50
Speaker
Like, my bad. You're forgiven. But it's like we talked with the shaken parent today and he said, I thought I had better grip. I had why have Parkinson's. What are you going to do? Sorry. um I was going to say, it's a motor story. 31 year old. Man was arrested after allegedly dropping, oh, it was a four-year-old, sorry, a four-year-old off the second floor of a Daytona Beach resort. According to the affidavit from the police department, the man identified himself, Brendan Gilmore, is now facing felony charge of aggravated child abuse, obviously. Yeah. But aggravated, that sounds like he tried to do a 10-2. According to the records from the Daytona Beach, Gilmore met the mother of the toddler approximately five hours
01:13:49
Speaker
before the incident. So not doesn't even sound like it's his. fuck Not even even to his kid. The man is like, this chick's. His kids getting away. The man said he was taking the child outside to play and scare him a little bit, then proceeded to hold um upside down by his legs over the balcony. Shouldn't I vanilla style.
01:14:12
Speaker
Damn, say Gilmore then dropped the toddler head first, letting him fall two stories to the ground. He was just swinging and playing with them. Uh, Dasani Bentley who witnessed the troubling incident said, and then he let him go and he had him by one foot and then it slipp right out of his hands and fell directly on his head on the concrete below. Jesus. Uh, Gilmore told the officers that he held the child over the balcony. He did not expand any further on his involvement. Bentley said the child looked pretty, took a pretty hard hit, you think?
01:14:49
Speaker
no shit at first Right the concrete. I think that's good. That kid looks like Stewie now. yeah i boy You like how I do that? You like how I do that? Well, should night reference. Yeah, but yeah, it's one thing like what I said, you're setting the camera back. Oh, shit. But this dude was like, I'm going to do so. So there's surveillance video. There's surveillance video. of The hotel caught the whole thing. Oh, God, I want to see that. You you have a clip. I have a video now. They're probably still checking it. Oh, let my Google work.
01:15:30
Speaker
Where does this happen, in Florida? Yeah, Daytona. That the child was rushed to the hospital as a trauma alert based on the seriousness of the fall. According to the police, the child suffered blunt force trauma to the head. Clearly, like obviously. Witnessed absolutely devastating. I don't even know how to react if that was my own. ah Department of Children and Families took a report. Gilmore is now charged charged with aggravated child abuse and is being held at the county of jail. Where the hell did it i just seem?
01:16:04
Speaker
But fortunately, the yeah no major injuries to the child, nothing lifelong. the but the The kid was actually released, I think, the next day from the hospital. So thank God the baby wasn't hurt. But Florida man going Florida man shit. Yeah, that's some Florida man shit. So this guy literally said he was going to take the kid and scare it. Well, yeah, you know that that oh, you almost fell kind of like that I get. But this dude was like, he thought do you want to yeah he wanted to be Arnold from commando and be like, hey, remember when I told you I was going to kill you last? Yeah, I lied.
01:16:49
Speaker
Yeah, so not even his kid. So, you know, if I was the father of that kid, me and I would be doing something to get myself locked up in the county jail with him. and happy having a conversation with him. Just pay the bail or pay the guard to look the other way. Give him like 20 bucks, I'm sure. He'll be in the cell for 15 minutes. Give me five minutes. Maybe even both.
01:17:20
Speaker
but were So I found a bunch of videos, but they don't show the actual security footage. I put in Florida baby dropped off balcony. Yes, that's that's. Yeah, and and yeah, Michael Jackson did do it. But at the end of the day, he was like, oh, shit, my bad. You know, it was it was. Staged, not staged two seconds. This dude was like, and look at this, I can hold a baby. Yeah. Oh, shit, a sock came off, you know. Exactly. Well. What an asshole. And then other Fourth of July news.
01:17:58
Speaker
I never understood this competition every 4th of July. I don't. It makes no sense to me and or any other competition of its kind. But the food eating competitions. And every 4th of July they have the Nathan's. I don't enjoy chestnut owns it and there's some Asian guy that is like dominates. Well, there's a there's a scandal of foot. That's the story I told where the guy got kicked out. No, no, that's Joey. He didn't. Yeah, that's Joey. There's another another one. Another one. That reading is a thing. I didn't even know that was a thing. They think that's I'm not in sport. Major League. Hey, hey, **** you. I will dominate that **** sport, sir.
01:18:53
Speaker
I can definitely one you're gonna want you know put your money where your fucking mouth is. They get 11 minutes, eat as many hot dogs as they possibly can. And the guy who won eight, like 55 or 60 of them or some shit like that, the lady who won the women's competition, she's like a 300 times champion. Ladies as big as my leg. I don't know where she puts it all at. She set a new women's record by eating 51 hot dogs. So big mouth McGillicuddy, we start biting more than you can chew. Just no minutes. Wait, do you got to eat the bun too?
01:19:32
Speaker
or just the dog. yeah it um but Yeah, the buns hard part. yeah So watch what you say before I put you up before I be like, like like you're going to join the fucking NFL tomorrow. Fuck you. No, but I'm also not telling an NFL player that I could dominate their their their profession. It's eating. Okay. All right. Next Wednesday night, I'm going to put you on the clock. I'm going to give you 12 minutes and see how many hot dogs you can eat. I can't buy that many hot dogs. I could eat a pack of hot dogs in 11 minutes. That's a lot.
01:20:13
Speaker
a lot 55 hot dogs. That'd be a lot of hot dogs. Dude, could you imagine the fucking heartburn afterwards? No, not really, because at the end of the day, you know, flexing meat for Big Macs on the show. And I think the last place guy had like 30 some hot dogs. So that was the first place was 55. I could do 30. I could do 30. And 11 minutes? Maybe an hour. Maybe 12. 12. Honestly, the buns is the hard part, dude.
01:20:48
Speaker
that's a part of that job you Yeah, they put him in water. like the the The winner was trying to scarf as many and his and and he was taking it. It was all coming out. Like it looked like it was just like, it was like, yeah, you know, okay. so so ah Like I've seen people they eat all the they they've done these competitions and they eat all the ah dogs Then they take the buns and soak them in water and like Suck it up. Yeah, like it's a fucking soup. Yeah, that's disgusting. So I don't know if I could do that anyway could but the The lady who won Her husband was is a competitive eater as well. He was in said competition well, I guess there's a
01:21:32
Speaker
potential new video that has come out and some of the other competitors are saying that he cheated and that he was actually grabbing empty plates from the guys beside him to say that he ate more than and than than than what he actually ate. Okay. So, like, yeah, you're all sitting in a row. Me and Steven are next to me. Steven puts his empty plates to me. Oh, look at that. I just ate another one. Steven didn't eat that **** plate. Yeah. Okay. Yeah. Cause I don't totally do that to Steven, but I just steal your hot dogs in general. Give me that fucking. ah I don't even, I don't even know if the turd would bother me because at some point in time at me eating that many hot dogs, is that fat, I get so weird to me because, and then you look at the competitors.
01:22:28
Speaker
yeah Most of them, like the the guy who came in fourth, who's accused of cheating. He's a Jack dude. His wife who is like a four or five time, nine time, whatever champion. And I don't know how many times she's won in a row. She's not much bigger than my leg. Yeah. The little guy, man, we can put it away, boy. Yeah, like, like you don't see, you don't see 300-pound dudes winning eating contests. Yeah. Very often. It blows my mind. And now that it's a professional sport as well well. Well, it also, they train. Like, there was a guy on TikTok, he trains by going to Chinese restaurants. Yeah. Oh, you can eat buffets. And clearing it, clearing the fucking buffet.
01:23:08
Speaker
but That's fucked. Oh, yeah, like these guys go to all you can eat night at Hooters and Hooters is like we'll pay you to fucking leave I've seen it like I Can only imagine one guy the one guy got kicked out of the Chinese restaurant and then sued the restaurant because he was like Says all you can eat doesn't save time on it. It was there A lot of a lot of restaurants a lot of the all you can eat buffets. If you look now, they've put in like a fine print that guy but I'll be there for now. Yeah. It's like an hour, hour and a half time on it. Yeah. Something like that. But yeah. So so that the you you had the Joey Chesnut shit before before it, where he is signed with the vegan hot dog. I don't know. yeah Like hot dogs, hot dogs by themselves with you. Hot dogs by themselves are not that good, are not that good.
01:24:03
Speaker
You're not going to or either gotta have the condiments. You got to have to add up or relish or mustard or, you know, my favorite to chili cheese dog. I mean, you're not just going to eat a hot dog and bread on its own to be like, you know, it's actually kind of delicious. Right. Chili cheese. Let alone go a vegan realm. Yeah. Vegan, vegan, anything. So that was that that was that that happened before the competition with Joey Chesnutt because he signed with with with a vegan the hot dog company or whatever. They're like, look, we're an all **** beef, whatever Nathan's Hot World Famous Nathan Hot Dogs, man. Get your **** weird vegan **** out of here. We don't care how many times you want. We don't care how **** you are. Get the **** stepping. But now you got this cheating scandal.
01:24:52
Speaker
yeah Really a cheating scandal. I mean, where's Horatio at when you need him? yeah He's the real wiener. He really took the dog out of the bun. Yeah, yeah. I wonder how... Sure is. What what a kind of money is in there? Oh, there's a lot of money in there. your He sure is a hot dog.
01:25:28
Speaker
Cut! Cut! Fire! He never fails though, never fails. That boy can't say nothing, I'm thinking I'm glad about that. This is a good dog. I wonder if that dude has sex and he's like, You are welcome. And better good game. How was it for you? I've had better. Yeah, but yeah so this this guy's being accused of.
01:26:04
Speaker
stealing plates to make it look like he ate more than what he actually did but once again that's easily debunked because i'm sure they video this shit because at the end of the day it's not like i went to my room and ate 57 hot dogs honestly we are literally up in arms as a nation over people eating fucking hot dogs oh no hey hey that's what you see like there's people are in this fucking world that are like you know what i'm doing it's what the fuck moves it's in the unit and it makes you go no no i'm not i'm not talking bad i'm just saying there is literal people up in arms over this stupid bullshit no but like i'm talking like hundreds of thousands of dollars worth of prize money some of these fucking competitions
01:26:52
Speaker
Oh, I'm sure. Like, some of these's got some of these eaters, they'll make like $200,000 a year. but I'm sure Joey Chestnut's up in the millions. Oh, yeah. I mean, like go well let's see. Let's do it real quick. How many how many open how many supermarkets can you open a year? um yeah The Joey Chestnut vegan supermarket. What is on a Joey Chestnut's network? Network, yeah. Curious.
01:27:21
Speaker
Joey Chestnut reportedly makes so um mean it's worth because is worth a little over $3 million dollars in his annual salary. 500,000 a year, the 16 time champion. His motherfuckers are 16 down champion, a millionaire for putting wieners in his mouth. hey click we havet and i do my first you know ah you great yeah No, i mean that was i'm I'm just saying boys we should all just buy hot dogs every week and train to and eat a shit done a hot dog 500k a year fuck you I will eat hot dogs every day then you do that You you stay broke you stephen i'm on e much fucking i I'm fine staying broke fucking Give me a lifetime supply of mustard
01:28:13
Speaker
Like that's bad. sal cra I'm ready to run your diet. yeah Hate to break it to your heart. It's not going to really take it much. Yeah, because I eat so fucking healthy now. I mean, that's that's like fuck. I've eaten an entire pizza on the show. It's not like I'm the picture of hell that that that's like. In 2022, they said his net worth was four million dollars. and he's a full-time competitive eater. So, he does like asparagus competitions, pie competitions, watermelon. I'm not bad at the pie. Yeah, the pie one. Although, that the problem, well, you got those guys on like the the man versus food guy. You know, there's people who do that shit on TikTok. They go around and they find these, this you know, the the the burger challenge where it's a burger the size of my fucking head and you're like, you got one hour to finish it.
01:29:07
Speaker
I just saw a guy the other day, there was this ice cream parlor in, in like Iowa or some shit. And they have, they call it the kitchen sink. They literally serve it in a sink. And it's, it's an ice cream pie. And he got an hour to eat it. And Joey Chestnut's record, 11 and a half minutes for the hot dog competition. They're a big boy, 76 hot dogs. I'm a fucker. Holy fuck. I bet you can call him for a good time. The same. That's a lot. No shit, it's a lot. I don't think I could eat 76 hot dogs in a week. But that's in one sitting. That's not overtime, right? Yeah, 11 and a half minutes. 11 and a half minutes. 11 and a half minutes. Well, we've seen those videos where the guy swallows the hot dog whole. Have you seen those videos?
01:30:01
Speaker
and No, like the dudes. Oh my God. Oh, oh I'm about to blow your fucking mind, dude. No, I'm good. I don't know. i'm talking No, no, no, no, no, no, no. It's it's not a gross thing. It's like I've seen a couple of chicks do it, too. It's like they have zero gag reports. So have I. but but Connor's not here. yet He can't defend himself. You only wish, Glick. Uh.
01:30:29
Speaker
i mean hear and fuck that some eleven minutes holy fuck I mean, I mean, like, like, I think, uh, like McDonald's and I think Burger King, they have the two bite challenge. Like, can you eat a Big Mac in two bites or, uh, the, the, the giant Whopper and two bites. That's, ah that's something that's on the internet. Anywho, from one from one wiener to another. I have to I have to beat our mandatory penis conversation. yeah Yes, yes. By the way, I have a video. I'm going to show you for it. You know what? I got a video. I found a video. ah Go ahead and tell your penis story and I'll upload the video.
01:31:23
Speaker
Oh, good. we yeahre gonna You're not going to interrupt my penis story with your fucking Joey Chesnut Hoover and 76 hot dogs. Well, this is just a random clip of his. um slide ava there Pedro, give me a second here, Pedro. Like I said, the whole world of competitive eating, it boggles my mind. More power to him, I guess. So this is a competition he did where he ate 67. I didn't get a chance to read it. 62 hot dogs in 10 minutes. He ate a lot of hot dogs. It's loading, and it's going to play it in two seconds here. Processing. Oh my god.
01:32:08
Speaker
She was done this earlier. Here we go. I was under the impression we were just going to eat hot dogs and not have the other Dieter jerseys. You know, Coney Island is the birthplace of quiet luxury, and these jerseys, believe it or not, are Laurel P. That's the marker to watch. And then, obviously, you know, did that delay with that impact. I had a hard time to even watching it wanting to throw up. Yeah, it kind of makes growth. You see what he's doing with the bun? He's sticking it in the water. three 62, 162, hot dogs and buns in 10 minutes for his 16th win. I give you the number one ranked eater in the world, Joey Chestnut.
01:32:53
Speaker
By the way, his nickname is Jaws. Also, add Joey Chestnut to my list. You, sir, are still not as good of a champion as I am. Oh, I want to see you eat 60. Who taught champion, baby? You're lucky if I eat three hot dogs this i said and Glick's 27 or 30 championships still don't mean shit. I agree. That's that's a lot of hot dog, but he's literally he took the hot dog out of the bun with in one hand, stub in his mouth.
01:33:35
Speaker
And then with the other hand, he takes the bun and dips it in his water. Yeah. And then chuck where like that's the part I'm out. The guy who won this year, he like shoved like four buns in his mouth and he's looking like a chipmunk. And then he just takes the water. And I don't know how that counts because he takes the water and pours it. And then it's just all coming out of his mouth. Like, like this weird, like bread. All right. All right. Next, next. Like, I don't even like when my cake touches my ice cream. let alone watery butt. I hate, like, you know, ah you have cake and ice cream and the yeah the ice cream melts a little bit and gets your cake too moist. Gross. I prefer, I mean, I don't know. that's ah i not adam That don't bother me, but I'm not, I'm not like eating a cheeseburger and dipping it in my Pepsi before I take it. Agree. Agree. Although, you know what?
01:34:32
Speaker
Land for tomorrow. all right Um Let's uh, let's let's take a real quick break and hopefully we uh, Hopefully we uh, is connor still alive? Uh, I think he's helping his wife or laying down. i He did say he was pretty song dragged up. Yeah He probably probably laying on the floor. Heather nikki if he's in the yard at least videotape it. He's playing with the kids Uh, we'll take a real quick, a real quick break here. We'll come back. I got mandatory penis stories. Don't worry guys. I got it covered. I know you guys want hear um you guys look forward to hearing. du After last week, after last week and the dude serving up his penis, it's going to be hard to top buddy. I'm sorry. Oh, well, I'm not saying I'm going to top it. I'm just saying.
01:35:26
Speaker
may good i last hundred day i remember getting fire from this show. I I think it's time for me to be fired from the show are yourself already. Yeah. Just be a man. Be like Batman. be like bad but Batman didn't wait for the cops. He took care of it himself. Be like anyways, we're gonna take a little quick break. We'll be right back. Got a little blacktop Mojo with rewind.
01:35:58
Speaker
Hopefully we have audio this time.
01:36:06
Speaker
See what I have to deal with.
01:36:27
Speaker
But far we knew the world would end If I told you We could go back to that moment again Would you drop everything? Take my hand and follow Would you choose yesterday or tomorrow?
01:36:54
Speaker
Sunshine
01:37:04
Speaker
I don't know what to say again It's illusion Better than a promise you give When I love you for some reason Seems hollow But you choose
01:38:19
Speaker
It comes on while losing it
01:39:01
Speaker
And now it's time to swallow
01:39:37
Speaker
Tears as the day plays, it comes a while
01:40:32
Speaker
Play it, play it, play it
01:40:45
Speaker
Is there a little Blacktop Mojo for your holds? Go ahead and check those guys out. Give them a follow. They are on all social media and everywhere you stream music. All at Blacktop Mojo. Let them know we sent you. I just found out today that apparently they're doing two shows in Ohio at the end of the month. ah from that What are the voices they're doing to show it? is the music venue right behind my building that I work in. ah There you go. I'm like, son of a bitch. If I'd have known sooner, I would have got tickets. When's whens lookcon ah the It's Tuesday, the 23rd.
01:41:28
Speaker
And I was like, man, if I'd have known sooner. but you got fatherlaw a lot of time to lock in some tickets, but, uh, no, I didn't want to go back to what the fuck news. Everybody, uh, Jerry, she's here. Do you have his year? And you guys know me. I'm clicking. We still have no idea where Connor is. Should we check on him? Goodness good news is and so probably, I didn't get very far because he has no legs. um So after all this all his way.
01:42:02
Speaker
So, nonetheless, welcome back to what the fuck dude. If you're not already, give us a follow. We are on all the social medias, Facebook, Instagram, and we do shows live. on YouTube, Twitch, x but Xbox, the x rock actually x and can also have on your Xbox. If you're watching us on YouTube or Twitch on your Xbox, we can be live on your Xbox or on your police station.
01:42:35
Speaker
Uh, but you can watch the shows live on YouTube, Facebook, Twitch, and X, and you can listen anytime, any place, wherever you listen to podcasts at all at the nonsensical network, or simply go to bio dot.link slash nonsensical network. It's right down there at the bottom of the screen. It's been scrolling all night. Ladies and gentlemen, give us a follow, give us a like, and, uh, give us a share. If you'd be so kind, we greatly appreciate that. We do enjoy you guys hanging out, listening to us. We do have shows most of the nights during the week live. We have a network of shows, if you will, not a, not a network of channels, like some people, uh, but actual different shows every day of the week. Uh, well, we'll get back to the every day a week. Eventually we got to work out a few kinks and then shuffle the deck. I guess we're going to shuffle the deck up a little bit and move some things around, but, uh, it's called evolution and growth and change. Sometimes you got to change things up to, to, to be better. And, uh,
01:43:33
Speaker
That's what we're going to do. That's what we're going to do here at the nonsensical network. Unfortunately, you know, talking shit is no longer with us. RIP to the guys. It was an unfortunate accident that they were involved in and involved in it's the wrong person. They fucked around in 1986. Woodchuck station wagon and a trip to the inner city. here ah You're taking the old Queen family truckster. Roll it yeah the park and The park's closed. Who should have told you outside? Yeah, I'm sorry. It it was the it was an unfortunate accident. It was a lover's quarrel. I think the official police report was was murder, suicide. i yeah It's not being confirmed.
01:44:25
Speaker
Mark murdered Brian and killed himself. I'm not sure, but we wish their families the best. Once again, once again, we say things. That doesn't mean it's true, folks. I'm talking to you, Blaise. I'm talking to you, Blaise, and I'm not being eaten by a chupacabra. <unk> Or has he? I heard that it was a jealous, it was a jealous kind of rage. I don't know. I don't know all the details yet. We're still trying to as as we know more details. We'll let you i know. I'll give you the real story. They threw a water balloon at Danny Trejo.
01:45:07
Speaker
bit And Danny Trejo is like that breakfast and beat them to death. And if by some divine miracle, they are still alive, you can watch them on Thursdays. and but
01:45:25
Speaker
I wish we would stop trying to change the narrative. I'm just trying to tell the truth out here and let people know that we're no longer with us. Rest in power, friends. Rest in power. but it okay report like i i did for every snake It goes bad. He's like, they're dead. Yeah. It's not a conspiracy. I had to fire Jaravish later down the road. He's dead. Yeah. Trust me. If you stop showing up on shows, I don't have to say anything. Everybody's just going to assume that you hung yourself because of the amount of times that you said you were going to hang yourself. Okay. When they asked me, I'm going to go, yep, he did. You want to see the video? Yeah, we had it happen a lot. It's going to be like that almost Presley thing. Rare Jervis. She siding. That's not Jervis. She okay. He died. Get over it.
01:46:20
Speaker
yeah Get over it. so maybe Are you trying to prepare yourself to Elvis? No, I'm just saying. That's a quick level crazy quick level crazy. You can't do that. Jeff, I'm just saying, if that ever did happen, you know there would be people out there that would be trying to figure out if I'm still alive or not. and Maybe Alyssa. yeah the beat yeah he'd be the first one to know if i was yeah The people he's talking about are Yeah, it's the voices in his head <unk>s got got whisper They talk to me they understand We were she could talk back what i do there an argument we behind fun but your youre're You're more like a gardener snake than you are a viper
01:47:13
Speaker
Be like the time Randy Orton tried to do his wake up taunt and he fucking dislocated his shoulder. I dislocate bull shoulders. trying to do that Yeah, Eddie Eddie. Let's get back into got a couple more stories for you here and I know I gotta I gotta I gotta to meet the mandatory penis story so I got got a good show, but we don't have a penis on the show. We really don't, but evidently we have fascination with that and yeah. ah i I just want to start this with saying just because there's a hole does not mean you should try to put something in said home. Did he get consent?
01:47:58
Speaker
48 year old man should have known better plenty old enough to know better was left in agony after sticking in a SIM card extractor tool. Oh, my God. Electric cable cable. And rubber band into his penis. OK, I'm trying to do a visual and and I can't I'm drawing a blank. Can we get like a Gordon Ramsey voiceover for this part?
01:48:34
Speaker
Oh, ah yeah well, there's your, there's your visual Jeff. your very Jeff. That's the extra. Thank you. I will not sleep. much
01:48:47
Speaker
Step away from the computer equipment. Hey, uh, a man was left in extreme pain after shoving a SIM card extractor tool. an electrical cable and a rubber band into his penis. How else is he supposed to get the journal out? I'm just saying what he thought it was going to fucking tickle. Well, no, no, there is that there is a there's a fetish where people shove shit down there. No, I know that. But the guy thinking it wasn't going to fucking hurt but like it's called it's called grounding. They take a metal rod and they shove it into your pee pee hole.
01:49:23
Speaker
Oh. And they take another little thing, like a little fork thing, and they hit it. It's called sounding. Watch the videos, Jarvis. No, I'm good. I'm good. I don't know. I don't know. I don't understand why I know about the shit that I know, especially when it comes to sticking things in your finger. Because even as a child, I knew that you should not stick things in there. Glick. We've seen a thing or two, because we've seen a thing or two. Right, anything once, except something on my dickhole. I'm sorry. yeah the uh the the 48 year old from Indonesia told this I'm going to call I'm going to call him out. I'm going to say this is a **** lie. This is a bald face **** lie. It's all the doctors that he had never inserted any foreign objects into his penis before. now I'm going to call it a lie because because let's be honest and I'm not saying I'm **** hung like Steven over here. Mister, I'm a porn star but I would struggle putting a ninepeny nail
01:50:22
Speaker
down my pencil, you know, it's not that big. really that But when, when you get caught doing something, it's never the first time you've done it. honor time You got caught. Yeah, let's be on. Yeah. I mean, it's not like, but anyways, the man saw him after he found it increasingly difficult to urinate telling the medics that he was left dribbling. Hey, and
01:50:53
Speaker
but in urineest suggest it a basketballs joke somewhere like this out this is just he like he fucked himself up man Blood and urine test suggested that an unidentified man had kidney failure and a UTI. yeah And every of his pelvis then showed the object and a shadow resembling a wire and lodged inside him. Oh, okay. I get something. I'll show you this visual aid again here real quick. No, I'm good. I'm good. close Well, maybe I am. yeah virgin So where I show you this, this visual aid here again, shut up. yeah And if you see in the second picture, there's an arrow pointing right here. Yeah. That bottom arrow.
01:51:47
Speaker
is the electrical cord that's in his penis that's dangling close to the end. Dude, I have the weird, ah I have the weird question, what gauge of wire? Just says electrical cord. I'm assuming probably like a US like the same. Yeah. Like a headphone jack kind of thing. That's not an easy task because cables flex. so So they did the x-ray and they found the stuff lodged in there. Doctors say the presence of a metal object saw him develop a bladder stone, which can cause painful symptoms. Surgeons who removed the stone, which measured three by five centimeters, said the SIM card tool was was at its core. So here you go, Jeff, or Steven.
01:52:47
Speaker
They describe sounding is when men insert items into their penis to enhance their sexual pleasure. It usually involves specially designed tools made out of glass or metal. um ah No, i you will be on the other end. That's a good way to get killed. How much about holes? No, again, you will be on the other end of that night. i will never i will I will pay to watch his face as you sub something of his ass because I want to watch him cry. The doctors would have to say that men who are interested in sounding should buy the proper tools and the equipment and get proper instructions before sticking things into your penis. Yeah, let's be honest. You know, I mean, they say anything can be a dildo, but yeah, yeahre I think you're pushing it there, buddy.
01:53:41
Speaker
Well, how about we wrap up the night with a with a butt story? Yeah. i feel But stuff it' ever it's not a good Wednesday. Tellers butt stuff. Let me say it. We're going to go back to Japan where they're eating penis. Urban Japan, a 56 year old man was arrested after inappropriate acts with a water fountain. Oh my God. Hey, you gotta get it cleaned somehow, buddy. 56 year old and he get begin to pay man decided he wanted to pull a prank on park goers. According to reports, the man was riding his bike through the park around 2 a.m. Cops noticed he was naked from the waist down, picked him up for public indecency while going through his phone.
01:54:37
Speaker
They find a picture of him with his butthole dressed up on one of the water fountains. but He said he did it. I was in Cancun all week, boys. I'm just saying. He said he didn't. Sure he were. Because he was horny. They took him in. They took him to jail for public indecency, property damage, and the park was closed for a day so they could clean everything. This is a water spigot, like at the water fountain. Yeah. picture failed him
01:55:08
Speaker
look this thing right up his as hey one anana ah um i'll bet you that fucker you could whistle now clean as mother butker ah your i mean great joke but yeah i think i think when i think of a prank I don't know. I don't know. I don't know. I don't know. I don't know. I don't know. I don't know. I don't know. I don't know. I don't know. I don't know. I don't know. I don't know. I don't know. I don't and are Throwing a water balloon. You know, not going to a shaving cream to the face. Yeah, yeah. Ran wrap across the doorway. I'm not going to run up on the toilet seat. Go to the local park and shove a fountain up my ass.
01:55:52
Speaker
Oh, to each their own. As I say, there's an ass for every seat in his ass, but the water. It's 2024. Who are we? The judge? Hey, I'm not mad at the guy. I've been horny, but I've never been like, you know what? That water fountain's looking kind of sick. Jarvis is being awfully quiet. Jarvis, how many water fountains have you sat on? No, I'm good. Where were you? on ah the f If I was in fucking Japan, I don't think I'd have come back. Just just saying. I agree.
01:56:22
Speaker
i have that I'm sorry, but there's worse places than fuck out you know Japan right now. snow and and and And with that being said, ladies and gentlemen, that is the news that makes us say, what the fuck? I'm speechless.
01:56:44
Speaker
to Yeah, I too. I'm curious. Did he turn it on? Well, I didn't say that he turned it on or anything. It was just a prank. He just wanted to put his asshole on the fountain and then he was probably going to come back the next day and watch people drink from it and go. My ass. How's my ass taste? You like that ass? Yeah, you know.
01:57:14
Speaker
Wow. Wow. i Shout out to Japan, boy. They get they they step it up, man. Yeah, exactly. Good God. And with that being said, hey, didn't your daughter have a senior prank coming up? He's already graduated. Yes, opportunity. Just go sit on a bunch of water bottles. Here we go. Yeah. I think I saw my fever.
01:57:47
Speaker
exactly Yeah. What flavors is water? It's fucking awesome. Hey, Grandma, I think my fever broke. Yeah. I wonder if liquid IV has an ass flavor. Yeah. Well, you you got that that. What's that? That curve bottles, you know, you got that. Oh, fuck. I don't remember eating corn. I'm not saying.
01:58:12
Speaker
Anyhooey. All right. Let's add wrap it up. That's the news that makes us say what the fuck. And hopefully it makes you say what the fuck as well. We appreciate y'all listening. Appreciate y'all hanging out. We'll see you next week for a brand new episode of what the fuck news. Until then Jarvis, do you have anything to say to the people before we leave? Let's say it fast. I don't think it's that we're making people say what the fuck. I think it's the world in general is making people wake up and say what the fuck is going on in this fucking world. maybe on
01:58:43
Speaker
Dude it's a social media shit has gotten worse like oh my god What about you Jeffrey you got anything you want to say before we leave real quick?
01:58:57
Speaker
itic Yeah, you know it's not a practical joke until you got your ass on us Well, I do have an outro so stay positive and test negative folks Just cuz the hot dog competition sounds like a good thing at the time doesn't mean it's gonna be good overall I yeah and Like I said, that is the news. um What the fuck? How we see this in the meantime, make sure you guys make sure you guys check us out on all social media, Facebook, Instagram, X and tick tock. Don't forget live shows over on YouTube, Twitch, X and Facebook every night. And you can listen to any time, any place, wherever you listen to podcasts, all at the nonsense. We'll never give us a follow up. Give us a like, give us a share. We'll see y'all next time around.
01:59:55
Speaker
Cole, look who came back. Now this fucker shows up. Jesus fucking idiot.