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PGW 31: Boys Chat Vol. 2
6 Plays11 months ago
The internet's only faith based podcast
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Transcript
Comedy and Politics: Hinchcliffe, Trump, and Cuban
00:00:00
Speaker
Do we want to start on a Tony Hinchcliffe note?
00:00:03
Speaker
Yeah, let's go.
00:00:04
Speaker
Let's get into it.
00:00:05
Speaker
That's the perfect part.
00:00:07
Speaker
I can't tell if McCusker and Gillis are backpedaling away from Hinchcliffe.
00:00:14
Speaker
Gillis' career is going too well for him to associate with Tony anymore.
00:00:18
Speaker
He's been a regular on Hill Tony lately.
00:00:23
Speaker
He's selling out stadiums now.
00:00:24
Speaker
I feel like he has to be like, sorry, fucker.
00:00:27
Speaker
You fucked up, man.
00:00:29
Speaker
I mean, I also feel like how much can you really rely on friends or people you know that their main purpose in your life is to perform on a show where they insult you?
00:00:39
Speaker
Yeah.
00:00:39
Speaker
You know what I mean?
00:00:40
Speaker
It's like maybe they're not friends.
00:00:42
Speaker
Yeah, when Shane goes on Tony, all he does is shit on Tony for an hour.
00:00:46
Speaker
Yeah, exactly.
00:00:46
Speaker
It's so funny.
00:00:48
Speaker
I saw a clip of Gillis basically just shooting the shit with McCusker.
00:00:53
Speaker
Can you imagine how funny it'll be if this...
00:00:56
Speaker
legitimately is like a reason why trump is not president and how much shit we will give this he might have lost him iowa man did you see that which is crazy that's insane this is probably coming out like on election day yeah badington gone wild endorses kamala turns texas into a blue state let's go turn texas blue and did y'all see uh yeah absolutely did y'all see um
00:01:21
Speaker
Trump's comments this morning.
00:01:23
Speaker
Yeah, it was crazy in Pennsylvania talking about election fraud and also kind of insisting people should shoot reporters.
00:01:29
Speaker
Did you see him call Mark?
00:01:32
Speaker
Yeah, he called Mark Cuban ugly.
00:01:34
Speaker
That's really yeah in a tweet.
00:01:35
Speaker
Hold on.
00:01:35
Speaker
I got to pull up this tweet.
00:01:36
Speaker
It's a fucking legendary Trump tweet.
00:01:38
Speaker
Speaking of Mark Cuban, Caitlyn Jenner also is like making transphobic the first.
00:01:46
Speaker
Yeah, yeah.
00:01:47
Speaker
Insane shit.
00:01:49
Speaker
She's not allowed to be the first of anything.
00:01:51
Speaker
Like, fuck her.
00:01:51
Speaker
I'm sure there are other trans
Trans Issues and Election Anecdotes
00:01:54
Speaker
trans folks.
00:01:54
Speaker
There's enough like right wing grifter trans people who have like now turned into like they shouldn't use the same bathrooms.
00:02:01
Speaker
And it's like, bitch, which bathroom do you use?
00:02:05
Speaker
Ma'am, excuse me.
00:02:07
Speaker
Red, I cannot wait for you to see Conclave, dog.
00:02:10
Speaker
I'm so stoked.
00:02:12
Speaker
Here we go.
00:02:12
Speaker
Here we go.
00:02:13
Speaker
This is it.
00:02:14
Speaker
I'm just going to read it in its entirety.
00:02:16
Speaker
Mark Cuban, a really dumb guy who thinks he's hot stuff.
00:02:20
Speaker
I'll try to do it in the voice one.
00:02:21
Speaker
Mark Cuban, really dumb guy who thinks he's hot stuff, but he's absolutely nothing.
00:02:25
Speaker
He's now out there saying, I don't surround myself with strong women.
00:02:28
Speaker
Actually, he's very wrong.
00:02:29
Speaker
I surround myself with the strongest of women, with the understanding that all women are great, whether strong or not strong.
00:02:35
Speaker
This guy is such a fool.
00:02:36
Speaker
He's constantly on television being critical, and only for the reason that I tuned him out completely while president, because he called incessantly,
00:02:44
Speaker
I told him very pointily, look, Mark, I got a lot of things to do.
00:02:47
Speaker
I'm shifting accents.
00:02:48
Speaker
I can't do the whole thing in the voice.
00:02:50
Speaker
Look, Mark, I got things to do.
00:02:51
Speaker
I just can't be taking so many pointless calls from you.
00:02:54
Speaker
Hilarious.
00:02:55
Speaker
In any event, that affected him greatly because he's a very insecure guy and an all caps major loser.
00:03:01
Speaker
Always has been and always will be.
00:03:02
Speaker
Nobody likes him.
00:03:03
Speaker
Nobody respects him.
00:03:04
Speaker
And he's unattractive both inside and out.
00:03:07
Speaker
Jesus Christ.
00:03:09
Speaker
That's poetry, baby.
00:03:10
Speaker
He should go back to talk about he should he should go back to talk about the person he was forced to support.
00:03:17
Speaker
Good grammar, Trump, because I didn't want it.
00:03:19
Speaker
Lion Lion Kamala Harris.
00:03:21
Speaker
Also, he's got no club head speed.
00:03:24
Speaker
Yeah.
00:03:26
Speaker
That part was actually really fucking funny.
00:03:29
Speaker
That's a bar.
00:03:29
Speaker
That's a bar.
00:03:30
Speaker
That's a fucking bar.
00:03:31
Speaker
I may, in fact, be surrounded by the strongest women in the world, including heads of countries who make Mark look like a, quote, baby.
00:03:39
Speaker
All strong women and women in general should be very angry about this weak man's statement.
00:03:43
Speaker
Yeah.
00:03:44
Speaker
It's kind of confounding.
00:03:49
Speaker
Thinking about it because Trump to me Very clearly doesn't like Mark Cuban because Mark Cuban just has more money than he does Yeah and Mark Cuban Is actually a good investor And Trump is maybe the worst investor of all time Yeah oh 100% like Trump is like Just barely a billionaire whereas like Mark Cuban is like
00:04:08
Speaker
many, many, many times over a billionaire, which is why I think it's kind of funny that now he hangs out with Elon, but I think maybe it's they're just both in the losers with bad investments club.
00:04:19
Speaker
It's two dumb bitches standing across from the... Ah, fuck.
00:04:22
Speaker
It's two dumb bitches standing across from each other just saying exactly.
00:04:26
Speaker
Exactly.
00:04:27
Speaker
Exactly.
00:04:28
Speaker
Did y'all see... Did you see Elon say he's like a dark gothic MAGA?
00:04:33
Speaker
Yeah, it's... He's so crazy.
00:04:35
Speaker
Shit.
00:04:36
Speaker
It was despicable.
00:04:38
Speaker
He fully lost the plot when someone pointed out that he's doing that dumb little jump thing to make an X in the air to promote his website.
00:04:48
Speaker
Oh my God.
00:04:49
Speaker
He is the most divorced guy of all time.
00:04:52
Speaker
Yeah.
00:04:53
Speaker
Also, Reg looks so cherub-like.
00:04:57
Speaker
Our little angel.
00:04:59
Speaker
I hope he doesn't fall asleep.
00:05:02
Speaker
Yeah, don't be fucking boring and he won't.
00:05:04
Speaker
Jesus Christ.
00:05:05
Speaker
I do think it'd be a good bit if I just like very just passively throughout the pod got quieter and quieter until I just fell asleep.
00:05:15
Speaker
Mike in hand in bed.
00:05:17
Speaker
My guy is honk shooing.
00:05:19
Speaker
There's a whole corner of the internet for stuff like that.
00:05:22
Speaker
Yeah.
00:05:26
Speaker
Oh, man.
00:05:27
Speaker
Oh, man.
00:05:28
Speaker
How's everybody doing?
00:05:29
Speaker
Oh, yeah.
00:05:29
Speaker
Yeah.
00:05:30
Speaker
Come on.
00:05:30
Speaker
Voted early.
00:05:32
Speaker
Two and a half hour long way to vote.
00:05:34
Speaker
Jesus Christ.
00:05:35
Speaker
Oh, shit.
00:05:36
Speaker
Was that pretty standard from what you're hearing?
00:05:38
Speaker
Yeah.
00:05:38
Speaker
Well, in Oklahoma, at least.
00:05:40
Speaker
Yeah.
00:05:41
Speaker
I had people say that Austin was super fast to vote early, but.
00:05:44
Speaker
Okay.
00:05:45
Speaker
They probably have a lot of polling sites.
00:05:46
Speaker
They probably went on top.
00:05:48
Speaker
Yeah, we have four.
00:05:49
Speaker
I went to the least crowded one, and it was 45 minutes.
00:05:52
Speaker
made friends with the guy in front of us in line, a big Dodgers fan.
00:05:56
Speaker
Every time he saw someone in an L.A.
00:05:58
Speaker
hat, he would just go, how about them Dodgers?
00:06:01
Speaker
And he said it about five times.
00:06:04
Speaker
I saw a video on Twitter of someone getting the Yankees logo laser printed on a blunt and then smoking on it at
00:06:11
Speaker
After the World Series.
00:06:15
Speaker
Speaking of polling centers, I had the fucking a dude on the ballot was like talking to people in line at the polling center.
00:06:24
Speaker
That's literally illegal.
00:06:25
Speaker
That's literally.
00:06:26
Speaker
It's like he was technically at his place of work, but I was like, no, you can't do that, man.
00:06:32
Speaker
You got to go.
00:06:33
Speaker
Yeah.
00:06:34
Speaker
I mean, I told it together till I saw him talking and looked over his shoulder and saw his picture and name on the wall.
00:06:39
Speaker
And I was like, what the fuck?
00:06:40
Speaker
That's crazy.
00:06:42
Speaker
Did I talk on the pod?
00:06:44
Speaker
He was running unopposed, but it still felt weird.
00:06:46
Speaker
You still can't do that.
00:06:47
Speaker
You still can't electioneer like that because what if they're right in election year for your idea, pal?
00:06:53
Speaker
Did I tell the story on the pod about the guy in the Trump hat and shirt?
00:06:57
Speaker
Taking his shirt off.
00:06:58
Speaker
Yeah.
00:06:59
Speaker
Yeah.
00:07:00
Speaker
When I went to vote, there's two funny things that happened.
00:07:02
Speaker
One, I was wearing like a bright green hat and the guy who was volunteering and outside like guiding the lines just thought there was something so funny about my hat.
00:07:11
Speaker
He's like, oh yeah, if you're in line, just follow the guy with the green hat.
00:07:15
Speaker
Fuck, bro.
00:07:16
Speaker
That's not your job.
00:07:17
Speaker
But he was just like roasting my ass for a green hat.
00:07:19
Speaker
Yeah, follow the guy in the green ass hat.
00:07:21
Speaker
Yeah, he's so green that fucking hat is, bro.
00:07:23
Speaker
Who's that big bitch in his green hat?
00:07:26
Speaker
Yeah, with that Mike and I head looking ass.
00:07:27
Speaker
Who let this fucking psycho out of the fucking home?
00:07:32
Speaker
Green hat.
00:07:33
Speaker
This bitch got green Eminem on his head.
00:07:38
Speaker
Spotify logo.
00:07:41
Speaker
Okay, thank you.
00:07:42
Speaker
That's basically what he was doing.
00:07:44
Speaker
Shrek's voting.
00:07:46
Speaker
He was constructing a tight five around my hat.
00:07:50
Speaker
But that was very funny.
00:07:51
Speaker
Who are you voting for, Shrek?
00:07:56
Speaker
I heard about Brett Summer, but you look more like Brett Worst, my guy.
00:07:59
Speaker
Hey, hey.
00:08:02
Speaker
But that happened, which was very funny.
00:08:05
Speaker
And then this other guy, this guy walked in in like a Trump T-shirt and a Trump hat.
00:08:10
Speaker
And that same guy who was roasting me the whole time was like, hey, man, you can't wear that.
00:08:14
Speaker
And he's like, really?
00:08:15
Speaker
And he's like, yeah, you can't wear like stuff promoting a candidate within like 150 feet of, you know, where people are voting.
00:08:21
Speaker
And the guy was like, okay.
00:08:22
Speaker
And he took off his hat, took off his shirt, put him on top of a trash can and then went in to vote shirtless, which was, I got scolded multiple times for having my phone out.
00:08:34
Speaker
Yeah.
00:08:34
Speaker
They weren't really scolding for that, but I think like they were when he got a little closer, but I was just in line for so long that it didn't like, they, they did have a sign on the door inside the place that was like,
00:08:44
Speaker
Turn your phone off.
00:08:46
Speaker
Do not disturb, baby.
00:08:48
Speaker
When's the next time we're going to have a normal week?
00:08:51
Speaker
Oh, gosh.
00:08:52
Speaker
Dude, I haven't had a normal week in the last 10 years.
00:08:54
Speaker
Dude, it's crazy.
00:08:55
Speaker
Yeah.
00:08:57
Speaker
Yeah, I don't know.
00:08:58
Speaker
Shit keeps happening, man.
00:08:59
Speaker
We're also approaching the holidays, and that's not going to be
Everyday Humor and Entertainment
00:09:02
Speaker
fucking easy.
00:09:02
Speaker
Here's the thing that blows my mind.
00:09:03
Speaker
The fucking horrors.
00:09:05
Speaker
Yeah, here's the thing that blows my mind.
00:09:06
Speaker
Horrors persist.
00:09:07
Speaker
Everything happens every day, and yet nothing happens anywhere.
00:09:12
Speaker
Uh-huh.
00:09:14
Speaker
Keep going.
00:09:15
Speaker
That's a bar.
00:09:16
Speaker
That's a bar.
00:09:17
Speaker
I'm just like, just so many things are happening, but nothing is changing.
00:09:22
Speaker
Yeah, for real.
00:09:22
Speaker
What I would give to be cellphoneless stuck over the winter break at a East Coast preparatory school.
00:09:28
Speaker
Dude, we get, yeah, holdovers core.
00:09:31
Speaker
Please.
00:09:31
Speaker
We gotta, we gotta, we gotta do a, Paddington Gone Wild does the holdovers and we just record a bunch of podcast episodes while we're stuck in a boarding school.
00:09:41
Speaker
That's a really good idea.
00:09:43
Speaker
We gotta get a wise older man to come like guide us.
00:09:46
Speaker
Which one of us would go full shining first?
00:09:52
Speaker
Yeah, you'd bust out the axe I feel like.
00:09:56
Speaker
I would just keep asking y'all who you're voting for at the conclave.
00:10:00
Speaker
Yo!
00:10:03
Speaker
Oh, I want to talk about it so bad.
00:10:05
Speaker
Oh my God.
00:10:06
Speaker
I'm so ready for Red to see it.
00:10:07
Speaker
Fuck Cardinal Tedesco.
00:10:10
Speaker
Rip your vape in hell, you bitch.
00:10:13
Speaker
Tedeschi trucks band more like Tedesco sucks dick.
00:10:17
Speaker
Yeah.
00:10:19
Speaker
That's cool, man.
00:10:20
Speaker
The only other thing I'm going to say, because I do want Red to go on as spoiler-free as possible.
00:10:25
Speaker
I now know to hate Tedesco.
00:10:27
Speaker
Well, it'll feel... It's very clear from the beginning.
00:10:31
Speaker
There are twists.
00:10:32
Speaker
Maybe Tedesco being a piece of shit is not a twist.
00:10:35
Speaker
One of the openings is just two Cardinals being super catty about Tedesco coming.
00:10:40
Speaker
Like they're like, is he coming?
00:10:42
Speaker
Yeah, it's incredible.
00:10:44
Speaker
They hate him.
00:10:45
Speaker
And my dude rips a vape the whole movie, like a red vape that matches his like vestments.
00:10:53
Speaker
It's like in the Vatican, just like serving, ripping this fucking little red vape.
00:10:58
Speaker
Dude, pre-smoking cigarettes is a vibe I did not know would be so sweet until I saw it.
00:11:04
Speaker
I love that shit.
00:11:06
Speaker
And they're all smoking.
00:11:08
Speaker
Except for two of them.
00:11:10
Speaker
There's that one shot early on of all the cigarette butts.
00:11:13
Speaker
I'm so excited for you to see this.
00:11:15
Speaker
Cinema, baby.
00:11:16
Speaker
I really enjoyed seeing a lot of San Antonio elderly Catholics with pissed off looks on their faces at the end of it.
00:11:23
Speaker
Yeah.
00:11:24
Speaker
I mentioned to you, I wound up randomly sitting next to this couple from my church.
00:11:29
Speaker
They just happened to buy the tickets next to mine.
00:11:31
Speaker
And when...
00:11:34
Speaker
There's a moment later in the movie and Carol sitting next to me just saying, I don't think Catholics are going to like this very much.
00:11:41
Speaker
Which is dumb as shit.
00:11:43
Speaker
It was really good.
00:11:44
Speaker
Yeah, they should.
00:11:46
Speaker
Relax.
00:11:50
Speaker
I'm sorry, Red.
00:11:51
Speaker
All I was trying to say is Rossellini fucking serves in this movie.
00:11:54
Speaker
Oh, brother.
00:11:55
Speaker
Everybody serves.
00:11:56
Speaker
My God.
00:11:57
Speaker
I love it.
00:11:58
Speaker
But Russell and he is.
00:11:59
Speaker
It is.
00:12:00
Speaker
It's a very serving movie.
00:12:02
Speaker
Yeah, it's I don't know.
00:12:04
Speaker
I mean, I'm just really excited.
00:12:05
Speaker
What serves more challengers or Conclave?
00:12:09
Speaker
Honestly, Conclave.
00:12:10
Speaker
Conclave is kind of servier.
00:12:12
Speaker
Yeah.
00:12:14
Speaker
I will say in Challengers, Challengers is a lot of cunt, but Conclave is just serving.
00:12:25
Speaker
There's a difference.
00:12:27
Speaker
That was also a joke because Challengers is a tennis movie.
00:12:32
Speaker
Why do you want to talk about sexuality and you want to go on about sports?
00:12:40
Speaker
Tennis is the gayest sport.
00:12:42
Speaker
Go back to fucking Straitsville, sis boy.
00:12:46
Speaker
Tennis is the gayest sport.
00:12:48
Speaker
Go watch SportsCenter and fall asleep while jerking off.
00:12:50
Speaker
Just chill the fuck out.
00:12:52
Speaker
Yeah, congratulations.
00:12:53
Speaker
Red's got women's tennis on the TV.
00:12:56
Speaker
Dig hard in the hand.
00:13:00
Speaker
Yeah, go Falcons.
00:13:02
Speaker
Go Dawgs.
00:13:03
Speaker
Go Bears.
00:13:05
Speaker
Sick of Bears.
00:13:06
Speaker
Fuck TCU.
00:13:07
Speaker
Fuck the Frogs.
00:13:09
Speaker
I just started watching Nobody Wants This, as I mentioned a few minutes ago, and it's very funny so far.
00:13:13
Speaker
And it's like 26-minute episodes, which God bless.
00:13:15
Speaker
But there's a joke in like this first or second episode where they're talking about young Mandy Patinkin, and Tim Simon's character's like, yeah, I got half a sandwich just thinking about him.
00:13:25
Speaker
And I thought that was really funny.
00:13:27
Speaker
Oh, that's good.
00:13:28
Speaker
Half a sandwich.
00:13:28
Speaker
He doesn't love young Mandy Patinkin, though.
00:13:30
Speaker
I mean, the hottie to dot.
00:13:33
Speaker
Oh, my God.
00:13:35
Speaker
What's his character's name?
00:13:37
Speaker
Yentl?
00:13:39
Speaker
I don't remember.
00:13:40
Speaker
He is so fucking good.
00:13:42
Speaker
Can you hear me?
00:13:44
Speaker
He's so hot.
00:13:45
Speaker
That's like the hottest movie ever made, bro.
00:13:48
Speaker
Like that movie is unreal hot.
00:13:50
Speaker
His name is Avigdor.
00:13:54
Speaker
I've never done seen that movie.
00:13:57
Speaker
Maybe I should put that flick on the watch list.
00:13:58
Speaker
It's a good time.
00:13:59
Speaker
You should watch Yentl.
00:14:00
Speaker
Yentl's great because it is pitched as a musical when in reality it's just like a really interesting queer story.
00:14:06
Speaker
And it's a musical of which only Babs sings and none of the songs are diegetic.
00:14:13
Speaker
They're just all like cutouts.
00:14:14
Speaker
It's just her breaking into song.
00:14:16
Speaker
It's just her breaking into song.
00:14:17
Speaker
It's incredible.
00:14:17
Speaker
It's like her inner monologue is song.
00:14:18
Speaker
The only thing I know about Yung Tool is from different bits they do about Barbra Streisand in The Nanny reruns.
00:14:28
Speaker
Oh, that makes sense.
00:14:29
Speaker
They do a lot of Barbra Streisand bits in The Nanny.
00:14:32
Speaker
I would, I think, recommend all of Barbra Streisand's movies that she directed.
00:14:36
Speaker
Is that the Fran Drescher show?
00:14:38
Speaker
The Nanny?
00:14:39
Speaker
Yeah, The Nanny.
00:14:41
Speaker
The only I have I've not watched the nanny ever, but I they did one.
00:14:46
Speaker
There's like a random bit that people put up on Twitter a lot of where they decide that like.
00:14:54
Speaker
actually like it's that something is wrong with her voice and she speaks normally for like three uninterrupted minutes and it's really fucking funny it's so weird recently because she's like the president of SAG after us so she's out there talking during the strikes and everything and I was like the nanny
00:15:12
Speaker
Yeah.
00:15:13
Speaker
What's going on?
00:15:13
Speaker
Here's the thing about the nanny.
00:15:14
Speaker
Fran Drescher can still get it.
00:15:16
Speaker
The will they, won't they in the nanny is such bullshit because if I was Mr. Sheffield in that show, single, and I had Fran Drescher, peak Fran Drescher, Fran Drescher now living in my house, wanting my dick so bad it hurts.
00:15:30
Speaker
Yeah.
00:15:32
Speaker
There's no way I would have lasted 20 fucking minutes.
00:15:37
Speaker
She does really want that man.
00:15:39
Speaker
I would have proposed in 20 minutes.
00:15:41
Speaker
Yeah.
00:15:42
Speaker
It would have taken 10 minutes to fall in love and 10 minutes to go by the ring.
00:15:46
Speaker
How long did it take to get hard?
00:15:50
Speaker
He walks in the door.
00:15:52
Speaker
He's like Matt in Rap World.
00:15:53
Speaker
Can't get hard.
00:15:54
Speaker
You're going to hurt yourself.
00:15:59
Speaker
That scene.
00:16:02
Speaker
Oh my gosh.
00:16:03
Speaker
I was watching that.
00:16:04
Speaker
I always forget that my
00:16:05
Speaker
So this is a fun thing for me watching movies.
00:16:09
Speaker
One of the kinds of movies I love to watch very often are trash VHS bin horror movies from the 80s.
00:16:16
Speaker
I just watched Chopping Mall and Death Spa, both on Tubi, by the way.
00:16:22
Speaker
Might be my favorite genre of movie ever.
00:16:25
Speaker
There's a lot...
00:16:28
Speaker
20% of these movies is softcore pornography.
00:16:29
Speaker
Just fucking sick.
00:16:31
Speaker
Just got to get that out of the way.
00:16:34
Speaker
There are shots.
00:16:35
Speaker
There's full Bush in Death Spa like three or four times.
00:16:38
Speaker
Fuck yeah.
00:16:39
Speaker
Sick.
00:16:39
Speaker
That's how Messiah of Evil is.
00:16:41
Speaker
Messiah of Evil is just like tits, bushed.
00:16:44
Speaker
Let me say something, Joe.
00:16:45
Speaker
I'm going to cut you off here very briefly.
00:16:47
Speaker
I'm going to make a statement on behalf of Paddington Go Wild.
00:16:50
Speaker
Paddington Go Wild is a pro-Bush podcast.
00:16:52
Speaker
George, pussy, Jeb, all of it.
00:17:03
Speaker
Because I watch a lot of these movies, and I throw them on the TV in my living room.
00:17:09
Speaker
And then there's just people fucking...
00:17:11
Speaker
Yeah, so I forget that my window in my living room is just opens right to the street.
00:17:16
Speaker
So I have to be careful when I'm watching these and don't have my blinds closed
Film and TV Discussions
00:17:20
Speaker
because it just straight up looks like I'm watching porn on the TV in the living room, which is such an alpha move that I'm almost tempted to just go for it.
00:17:30
Speaker
Clarissa walked in during a scene of this movie.
00:17:32
Speaker
I don't remember which one, but I think they were at the party.
00:17:34
Speaker
And she just looked very resigned and was just like, what is this?
00:17:38
Speaker
She was like, there's no way that this is something good.
00:17:45
Speaker
When I lived in New Orleans, I lived in a house with eight other people.
00:17:52
Speaker
Wait, no.
00:17:52
Speaker
I lived in a house with 14 other people.
00:17:55
Speaker
Shout out to Ministry Life.
00:17:57
Speaker
Nice.
00:17:57
Speaker
The cult that Kat and I were in.
00:17:59
Speaker
Uh...
00:18:05
Speaker
And next door to us was this couple.
00:18:09
Speaker
And at one point, like actually multiple times and like a three week span, people would catch either the husband or the husband and wife watching porn in their living room.
00:18:21
Speaker
They never close the blinds.
00:18:25
Speaker
And you know what?
00:18:26
Speaker
They're doing that together.
00:18:27
Speaker
Sure.
00:18:29
Speaker
At least it's a shared experience.
00:18:30
Speaker
Yeah, that's beautiful.
00:18:31
Speaker
I've never watched anybody else.
00:18:34
Speaker
Yeah, I can't say that's something I've desired to do.
00:18:38
Speaker
No.
00:18:38
Speaker
It's like I always see those bits like in like Superbad type movies where like they're like watching porn.
00:18:43
Speaker
They're like, oh, we should like check out this porno movie I found.
00:18:46
Speaker
They're just watching it.
00:18:47
Speaker
I'm like, I don't want to get a boner with my friends.
00:18:52
Speaker
It's like in Kinds of Kindness when they watch their own sex tape.
00:18:55
Speaker
You see that kind of shit in media portrayals all the time where dudes are lending tapes to each other or watching porn together.
00:19:04
Speaker
My upbringing was nothing like that.
00:19:06
Speaker
If we saw someone's search history when we were all at somebody's house, his ass would get roasted.
00:19:12
Speaker
What do you mean at this point in time?
00:19:15
Speaker
What do you mean you Googled Hannah Montana titties?
00:19:17
Speaker
What?
00:19:20
Speaker
When I was in high school, there was a spot on... I grew up in a beach town, and there was a spot on one of the beaches that they referred to as the Hobbit Hole.
00:19:32
Speaker
And it used to be a spot where you would like... It was this little kind of cutout area, and people would go and drink and party there.
00:19:42
Speaker
And a dude told me a story that
00:19:47
Speaker
him, another one of his buddies and two girls all went out to the hobbit hole and got really baked.
00:19:52
Speaker
And the girls told them to jerk off.
00:19:55
Speaker
And so these two dudes are just jerking off next to each other.
00:19:58
Speaker
And he told me this story as it was like, and this is like a fucking crazy weekend.
00:20:02
Speaker
And the entire time I'm like, dog,
00:20:06
Speaker
I think you guys might be victims.
00:20:09
Speaker
Yeah, for real.
00:20:10
Speaker
You guys got sexually assaulted.
00:20:12
Speaker
I think you got, I think like, I think you, no, that can't happen to dudes, man.
00:20:19
Speaker
Like, I'm sorry that happened to you.
00:20:21
Speaker
Can I give you a hug?
00:20:21
Speaker
Like, I'm like, like, no, no, no, dude.
00:20:24
Speaker
It was sick.
00:20:25
Speaker
Dude.
00:20:25
Speaker
It was sick, bro.
00:20:27
Speaker
The craziest part is that that's literally a scene cut from dead poet society.
00:20:32
Speaker
It's crazy.
00:20:32
Speaker
I'm just kidding.
00:20:33
Speaker
Oh, yeah.
00:20:34
Speaker
What if it was, though?
00:20:35
Speaker
What if it was like some girls just took the boys to the hobbit hole and they were like, jerk it for me.
00:20:40
Speaker
I mean, that's almost for me.
00:20:42
Speaker
It's almost challengers.
00:20:45
Speaker
Almost challengers.
00:20:47
Speaker
You ever just be jerking it?
00:20:48
Speaker
Is that what you just said to me?
00:20:50
Speaker
I was going to say it.
00:20:51
Speaker
I was going to say, you ever just be jerking it with your boys?
00:20:55
Speaker
No.
00:20:55
Speaker
In fact, all of us have said that we don't be jerking it with our boys.
00:21:00
Speaker
We are pro-Harris Waltz.
00:21:02
Speaker
We are anti-jerking it with the boys.
00:21:04
Speaker
How about that?
00:21:04
Speaker
Yeah, no dorking the penis, Vance, in here.
00:21:06
Speaker
Dorking it.
00:21:07
Speaker
penis veins.
00:21:08
Speaker
Jork in the penis veins.
00:21:09
Speaker
Jork in the microphone.
00:21:10
Speaker
Can we talk about Rap World, please?
00:21:12
Speaker
Yes.
00:21:13
Speaker
Speaking of dudes jacking off in Pennsylvanian basements.
00:21:20
Speaker
Guys, this movie, I just cannot recommend this movie enough.
00:21:23
Speaker
It's 55 minutes.
00:21:24
Speaker
It's for free on YouTube.
00:21:25
Speaker
Please just go watch Rap World if you haven't.
00:21:27
Speaker
It's a wonderful time.
00:21:30
Speaker
It's very fun.
00:21:31
Speaker
I had a lovely time watching it.
00:21:33
Speaker
I was so uncomfortable.
00:21:35
Speaker
Yeah.
00:21:36
Speaker
There's about a line a second, I think, that makes me laugh.
00:21:40
Speaker
The pace of the jokes is absolutely phenomenal.
00:21:42
Speaker
It's next fucking level.
00:21:43
Speaker
It's jokes on top of funny shit happening in the background.
00:21:47
Speaker
It's like an atmosphere of humor and then punchline after punchline, and I was giggling my ass off.
00:21:53
Speaker
That scene in the basement where they're at the cousin's house.
00:21:57
Speaker
Oh, my God.
00:21:57
Speaker
And his mom comes in.
00:21:59
Speaker
His mom's like, no.
00:21:59
Speaker
No.
00:22:00
Speaker
No, you do not leave your grandmother alone.
00:22:04
Speaker
I literally fed her applesauce today.
00:22:06
Speaker
He's not a toddler.
00:22:08
Speaker
I gave her like a whole jar of apples.
00:22:10
Speaker
It literally sounds like a line from Napoleon Dynamite.
00:22:13
Speaker
I literally bought her a crossword book.
00:22:14
Speaker
It's so beautiful.
00:22:16
Speaker
I bought her a crossword book with my own money whenever there's also such a like that scene is so funny when they're talking about how Eric Rahill's character goes to went to North school instead of South whatever and Dan Licata's character is like yeah this art town's like the opposite of North Korea no sorry art town's like North Korea where the North is the bad one laughter
00:22:44
Speaker
I mean, that's also you already quoted this on last week's app, but I heard the North girls.
00:22:50
Speaker
I heard the North High girls smell like Halloween masks.
00:22:53
Speaker
It's so funny.
00:22:55
Speaker
That's one of the best written jokes I've heard in years.
00:22:59
Speaker
Literally years.
00:23:00
Speaker
It's so funny.
00:23:01
Speaker
It's so complex.
00:23:02
Speaker
I was like, did Patti Shiave, did Billy Wilder write this?
00:23:05
Speaker
No, I'll tell you who wrote it.
00:23:06
Speaker
Fucking Dan Licata probably came up with that.
00:23:09
Speaker
If you watch his special, that's exactly how he constructs jokes.
00:23:12
Speaker
He just picks, constructs a sentence with a sentence where you literally can never tell where it's going to land.
00:23:19
Speaker
So that's the guy who plays Surge?
00:23:21
Speaker
Yeah.
00:23:22
Speaker
Okay.
00:23:23
Speaker
I want to remember this moment where I tried to talk to somebody.
00:23:26
Speaker
Yeah, dude.
00:23:27
Speaker
And then later when he walks back up the Conor Valley after that and goes, bro, I think I just had a conversation.
00:23:32
Speaker
And then he's like, where's the cereal?
00:23:35
Speaker
And he's like, oh, birthday gift.
00:23:38
Speaker
My wife just got birthday gifts for our nephews.
00:23:43
Speaker
But niece and nephew, sorry, gender.
00:23:46
Speaker
Yeah.
00:23:49
Speaker
Okay, you fucked up and then you yell about gender?
00:23:53
Speaker
Yeah, that's what Republicans do.
00:23:55
Speaker
I'm just taking a page in their book.
00:23:56
Speaker
Gender!
00:23:57
Speaker
They do something weird like be friends with Epstein and Diddy and then go, you know what's actually bad?
00:24:04
Speaker
Pronouns in the bio.
00:24:05
Speaker
Another funny SNL skill last night, the Harvey Epstein.
00:24:09
Speaker
That guy's a real guy.
00:24:10
Speaker
I know, he's a real guy.
00:24:11
Speaker
That makes it even better.
00:24:12
Speaker
Harvey Epstein, man.
00:24:14
Speaker
You know what?
00:24:15
Speaker
Speaking of pronouns in bio, he has them.
00:24:17
Speaker
Oh, shout out to Harvey Epstein.
00:24:19
Speaker
Shout out to Harvey Epstein.
00:24:20
Speaker
Probably not a good guy.
00:24:21
Speaker
Let's make New York Epstein's Island.
00:24:23
Speaker
That's the joke.
00:24:24
Speaker
That's really good.
00:24:26
Speaker
I got to go back and watch the rest of it.
00:24:28
Speaker
That's very exciting.
00:24:30
Speaker
The scene in this movie when the boy who has the ring, when he gets rejected, was like the most upsetting thing I've seen in a movie all year.
00:24:40
Speaker
It's horrifying.
00:24:40
Speaker
I was like, this is awful.
00:24:44
Speaker
I like it like right before that though when the girl from Jury Duty, Edie Monica I think is her name, or Monica, I'm not exactly sure.
00:24:54
Speaker
She's very funny, but when she's like flirting with him like, oh, I love you.
00:24:57
Speaker
Like, look at your chest hair.
00:24:59
Speaker
Can't you just like, don't you just like feel the vibes?
00:25:01
Speaker
Like, I can't even look at you.
00:25:02
Speaker
Like, my ears are getting hot.
00:25:03
Speaker
Like, there's just like something like- She plays Matt's sister.
00:25:05
Speaker
Yeah, there's like a spiritual connection.
00:25:07
Speaker
I'm like, I just like, you can't even look at me.
00:25:09
Speaker
You can't even look at me.
00:25:10
Speaker
He just goes like, stop it.
00:25:12
Speaker
You can't be doing this to me.
00:25:14
Speaker
Stop.
00:25:14
Speaker
I got a girl.
00:25:16
Speaker
She hates my ass.
00:25:19
Speaker
It's just the energy of like the where's my hug guy.
00:25:22
Speaker
Yeah, for sure.
00:25:27
Speaker
But then also when they're at the party and she just starts singing.
00:25:30
Speaker
Oh my God.
00:25:31
Speaker
Oh my God.
00:25:33
Speaker
It's just, it's, it's, it's a straight up time capsule back to a time where like, that was all you did.
00:25:39
Speaker
Mm hmm.
00:25:41
Speaker
God, what a movie.
00:25:42
Speaker
What a fucking movie.
00:25:42
Speaker
It's really special.
00:25:44
Speaker
And like you said, 55 minutes.
00:25:47
Speaker
That's Connor O'Malley.
00:25:48
Speaker
He's making it for the real people.
00:25:49
Speaker
There's another line in the movie that just took me off guard, but it's when they go into that room at the party and they're smoking weed with those three guys.
00:25:57
Speaker
And it just zooms into the one guy with long hair's face and he just goes, I smoked weed one time with a guy that was 25.
00:26:04
Speaker
Yeah.
00:26:05
Speaker
Yeah.
00:26:10
Speaker
Oh my God.
00:26:11
Speaker
By the way, those guys, shout out another podcast, Podcast About List, one of the funniest podcasts on the internet.
00:26:18
Speaker
Oh, cool.
00:26:18
Speaker
Those three guys, that's that podcast.
00:26:20
Speaker
And then the three of the dudes from Joy Tactics are also in this movie.
00:26:24
Speaker
I love that podcast too.
00:26:25
Speaker
So if you're looking for some funny people that don't talk about movies constantly, Podcast About List and Joy Tactics, stamp of approval.
Fast Food Humor and Holiday Traditions
00:26:34
Speaker
Okay.
00:26:35
Speaker
Dude, I just still like talking about movies.
00:26:38
Speaker
Yeah.
00:26:39
Speaker
I just love when Kelsey, Matt's ex's younger sister, when she's taking the photo of him and she's like, I think you have to smile for a passport photo.
00:26:52
Speaker
And he's like, I think this is really close.
00:26:54
Speaker
And she's like, no, it's fine.
00:26:55
Speaker
It's perfect.
00:26:55
Speaker
It's fine.
00:26:56
Speaker
It's fine.
00:26:57
Speaker
Oh my gosh.
00:26:59
Speaker
Oh, Mike.
00:26:59
Speaker
It's just like... Go ahead, Joe.
00:27:02
Speaker
Sorry.
00:27:02
Speaker
No, I was just going to sing its praises.
00:27:04
Speaker
Keep going.
00:27:04
Speaker
I mean, I know.
00:27:06
Speaker
I found the ending.
00:27:09
Speaker
I don't know if we're going to spoil it.
00:27:10
Speaker
So shocking and so funny.
00:27:14
Speaker
Like the last scene where they're all talking about him is...
00:27:20
Speaker
the funniest fucking thing I've ever seen.
00:27:22
Speaker
When his sister is giving a speech and his ex is in the audience like, yeah, sure, make it about you.
00:27:29
Speaker
Make it about you.
00:27:31
Speaker
What are you doing?
00:27:31
Speaker
Just suck a dick?
00:27:34
Speaker
No, no, I'm not even like, why would you call me an orator?
00:27:36
Speaker
Like, I don't even do that.
00:27:39
Speaker
Yeah.
00:27:39
Speaker
Like, I don't do that.
00:27:40
Speaker
Another just perfectly written line.
00:27:43
Speaker
I'm not like, I don't do that.
00:27:44
Speaker
Why would you call me an orator?
00:27:46
Speaker
I don't do that.
00:27:47
Speaker
Or also just from the beginning, I knew this movie was going to fucking kill me from in the beginning when they go to McDonald's and Jack Ben Singer's character.
00:27:55
Speaker
The I think it's Casey was his name.
00:27:58
Speaker
Yeah.
00:27:58
Speaker
Yeah.
00:27:59
Speaker
like does the mystic sauce prank on conor and then he goes dude that's not cool actually like to humiliate me and like sort of like a public way like that's not cool and then it like cuts to him outside the car fully screaming into his head because he's so angry i also just like there's a degree of which
00:28:21
Speaker
Like there are scenes where it's like clearly everyone who's involved is like in on the bit.
00:28:26
Speaker
And then they're just there at an actual McDonald's.
00:28:30
Speaker
Yeah.
00:28:30
Speaker
So like when he orders something wrong and then the girl on the drive through is like, what?
00:28:36
Speaker
He just asks again, can you repeat that?
00:28:38
Speaker
Because he orders a McFish?
00:28:40
Speaker
Like a McRib or a Filet-O-Fish?
00:28:42
Speaker
Or a Filet-O-Fish?
00:28:45
Speaker
Oh my God.
00:28:46
Speaker
McFish.
00:28:48
Speaker
But it's such a good way of playing in a space where you're doing a bit with someone who doesn't realize it because it's not mean.
00:28:57
Speaker
It doesn't make them uncomfortable.
00:28:58
Speaker
It's just a really honest, funny reaction to go, no, it's not.
00:29:02
Speaker
You mean Filet-O-Fish?
00:29:05
Speaker
It's like, do you mean McChicken or do you mean Filet-O-Fish?
00:29:09
Speaker
Yeah.
00:29:10
Speaker
Because it's making them the stupid ones.
00:29:12
Speaker
The characters that we know are the dumb ones, which is why it's way more appealing.
00:29:15
Speaker
It's such a cool character choice to order a Filet-O-Fish because that tells me a lot about you.
00:29:21
Speaker
100%.
00:29:21
Speaker
Are you calling it a McFish?
00:29:23
Speaker
Because there's some diehards out there.
00:29:25
Speaker
I've never had it.
00:29:26
Speaker
I've never tried one.
00:29:28
Speaker
I cannot bring myself to eat a Filet-O-Fish.
00:29:30
Speaker
I've never had one either, and it's just like, same deal.
00:29:32
Speaker
I don't need that.
00:29:34
Speaker
An old roommate of Zach and I's, our buddy Justin,
00:29:38
Speaker
recently decided that he was going to test the waters, if you will, and try a filet of fish.
00:29:45
Speaker
And he was sorely disappointed.
00:29:50
Speaker
I can't imagine he had a wonderful time.
00:29:53
Speaker
I will never forget my roommate from sophomore or junior year in college.
00:29:58
Speaker
He's from Seattle.
00:30:00
Speaker
And one day he goes...
00:30:01
Speaker
yeah man i like i'm really missing the seafood from back home and leaves and then comes back to the apartment with long john silvers oh my god he's like this is the only seafood i can find i i've never had this place is it good and we're all just like looking at him like oh buddy you're missing like no dog you're about to shit your pants yeah did you fucking see like is there condoms in your food like probably like
00:30:27
Speaker
What the fuck?
00:30:28
Speaker
I will say that Batman chowed down and loved the hell out of it.
00:30:32
Speaker
Hey, man.
00:30:33
Speaker
That's beautiful.
00:30:33
Speaker
Whatever gets you off.
00:30:34
Speaker
Somebody's got to be ordering fucking... What's it?
00:30:38
Speaker
Long John Silver's?
00:30:39
Speaker
Because it's still in business.
00:30:40
Speaker
I was convinced the Long John Silver's in Waco is a drug friend.
00:30:44
Speaker
Is that one closed now?
00:30:45
Speaker
Oh, yeah.
00:30:46
Speaker
Long John.
00:30:46
Speaker
The one in the grease pits closed, but not the one on Valley Mills.
00:30:49
Speaker
The one in Valley Mills is still there, but the one in the grease pit was a while back.
00:30:51
Speaker
It blows my mind that a town could have two Long John Silver's locations.
00:30:56
Speaker
And no Waffle House.
00:30:57
Speaker
Yeah.
00:30:58
Speaker
What are we doing in this country?
00:30:59
Speaker
What are we doing?
00:31:00
Speaker
You know what's insane about Long John Silver's just as a restaurant is that you can go and just be like, hey, give me some of that, like some of the crispy shit that falls off of like when you fry it.
00:31:11
Speaker
Yeah, like you can just order Like yeah, give me the extra crispy shit Basically what that is You also get the same thing Like you can order that or you can do Like the secret menu way to order Where you go up and you just go up to the window and go Hi, I'm a fat pig And I want my sloppy And I need my sloppy crunchies And then I need a sloppy crunch You have to call yourself a fat pig first It's slopping down pig shit With these fat fucks Yeah
00:31:41
Speaker
Sometimes the sad quests are the mission.
00:31:43
Speaker
Hell yeah, man.
00:31:44
Speaker
It's true.
00:31:45
Speaker
I rewatched that.
00:31:47
Speaker
I think you should leave sketch where they're like, she's like insulting everyone at the, with the Instagram captions.
00:31:52
Speaker
And my favorite part is she does one of those and they go, Oh no, no, you're supposed to like, it's, it's like you're insulting yourself.
00:31:59
Speaker
It's not, you know?
00:32:00
Speaker
And so then she does it again.
00:32:01
Speaker
The exact same starts like slurping down pig shit with these fat sacks of crap.
00:32:05
Speaker
And I'm actually the fattest of all of them.
00:32:10
Speaker
Are you guys aware that on a Filet-O-Fish, it's half a slice of cheese?
00:32:15
Speaker
Yeah.
00:32:16
Speaker
No.
00:32:16
Speaker
Isn't that fucking weird?
00:32:18
Speaker
It's a little tiny piece.
00:32:21
Speaker
Isn't that weird?
00:32:22
Speaker
Why not a full slice of cheese?
00:32:24
Speaker
It seems like more work.
00:32:26
Speaker
I feel the exact same way.
00:32:28
Speaker
I got a 20-piece McNugget on the way home last night, and those bitches were gone before I got home.
00:32:33
Speaker
I was I was I mean pretty special stuff I can't I can't deny McNuggets Langston Kerman as a joke in his Netflix special he's talking about he's like talking about how much he loves McDonald's and he's like my wife hates when I go to McDonald's she's like she's like they make their nuggets out of what did she say um
00:32:55
Speaker
They make their nuggets out of aborted fetuses.
00:32:58
Speaker
She says crazy shit.
00:33:00
Speaker
He does this whole bit about how crazy his wife is.
00:33:02
Speaker
It's really funny.
00:33:04
Speaker
I'll have to watch it.
00:33:05
Speaker
You got to check it out.
00:33:06
Speaker
It's maybe my favorite special of the year.
00:33:07
Speaker
It's so good.
00:33:10
Speaker
I love McNuggets.
00:33:13
Speaker
McDonald's has to get better sauces.
00:33:16
Speaker
That's fair, man.
00:33:17
Speaker
That's completely fair.
00:33:17
Speaker
I like some of them, but I agree with you.
00:33:19
Speaker
They're all pretty lackluster.
00:33:21
Speaker
Not to be super random XD narwhal potato, but the fucking Szechuan sauce is really fucking good.
00:33:31
Speaker
You don't have to like Rick and Morty to like the Szechuan sauce.
00:33:34
Speaker
It's delicious.
00:33:35
Speaker
Red, can I tell a story about you that you might not want me to tell?
00:33:38
Speaker
Real quickly, I'm a McDonald's barbecue sauce defender.
00:33:41
Speaker
It's good, man.
00:33:42
Speaker
The McDonald's barbecue sauce is one of the better sauces.
00:33:44
Speaker
And I like the hot mustard.
00:33:45
Speaker
I'm not even a huge mustard guy.
00:33:47
Speaker
Here's the shit.
00:33:49
Speaker
Hot mustard, sweet and sour sauce.
00:33:51
Speaker
Combine them.
00:33:53
Speaker
Oh, beautiful.
00:33:53
Speaker
It's phenomenal.
00:33:54
Speaker
That sounds like fire.
00:33:54
Speaker
Maybe I'm wrong.
00:33:55
Speaker
That sounds like fire.
00:33:57
Speaker
I'm willing to admit I'm wrong.
00:33:58
Speaker
Here's my story.
00:33:59
Speaker
Here's my story about Red.
00:34:00
Speaker
We were sitting at Pinewood one time, him, myself and Chris Wernett having a very similar conversation to this.
00:34:05
Speaker
We were talking about Chick-fil-A and their sauces and you remember what I'm going to say.
00:34:10
Speaker
Thank you.
00:34:11
Speaker
And we're just talking about the different sauces and everything.
00:34:13
Speaker
And and Red and Chris are talking about why they think Polynesian is bullshit.
00:34:17
Speaker
Polynesian sauce.
00:34:18
Speaker
And I was like, no, I like Polynesian sauce, all this stuff.
00:34:21
Speaker
And
00:34:22
Speaker
And Chris was like, yeah, but all this like people who say they like Polynesian sauce, like they're lying.
00:34:26
Speaker
They don't really like it.
00:34:27
Speaker
And Red just goes very quietly and he goes, yeah, I hate Polynesian people.
00:34:35
Speaker
Totally earnest, like, dude, I hate me.
00:34:42
Speaker
Chris just kind of looked at each other like this.
00:34:44
Speaker
Does he realize what he just said?
00:34:47
Speaker
And it was a moment in which they looked at each other and then looked at me and I went, what?
00:34:52
Speaker
One of those moments where you say some shit and then you don't realize that what you said was interesting.
00:34:59
Speaker
I had a bad moment in class this week.
00:35:01
Speaker
So like, I, uh,
00:35:05
Speaker
Have you ever referred to a family as a person and their people?
00:35:11
Speaker
Yeah, sure.
00:35:12
Speaker
Like, my family is my people.
00:35:13
Speaker
Yeah, sure.
00:35:14
Speaker
It has nothing to do with race at all.
00:35:16
Speaker
Yeah.
00:35:19
Speaker
I asked a kid, what are your people eat on Thanksgiving?
00:35:24
Speaker
Oh, no!
00:35:25
Speaker
This kid happens to be Hispanic, and he just looks up at me like, what did you say to me, Mr. Rice?
00:35:35
Speaker
Damn the woke mind virus already got this kid.
00:35:37
Speaker
Terrible.
00:35:37
Speaker
And I was like, you need to see it.
00:35:39
Speaker
Not like that.
00:35:39
Speaker
Not like that.
00:35:40
Speaker
I'm talking about like your family.
00:35:41
Speaker
I wish he would have hit you with the, what do you mean you people?
00:35:46
Speaker
And then you could have said, what do you mean you people?
00:35:49
Speaker
And then it doesn't make any sense anymore.
00:35:51
Speaker
And you're completely devolved.
00:35:53
Speaker
Yeah, it's just a tautology.
00:35:55
Speaker
I would have loved if he was like, what do you expect me to say?
00:35:57
Speaker
Like fucking sopapillas?
00:35:59
Speaker
Tamales?
00:36:00
Speaker
He's like, is that what you want, Mr. Roberts?
Religious Films and Celebrity Critiques
00:36:03
Speaker
At Thanksgiving, mi abuela, or grandma, makes sopapillas.
00:36:11
Speaker
I'm curious what y'all's response to this is.
00:36:13
Speaker
What prompted me to ask is because he told me his favorite part of Thanksgiving is the honey glazed ham.
00:36:18
Speaker
And I was like, that's fucking bullshit.
00:36:21
Speaker
My family does a honey glazed ham for Thanksgiving.
00:36:25
Speaker
We do that along with the turkey.
00:36:27
Speaker
Yeah, of course.
00:36:28
Speaker
I like ham more than turkey.
00:36:30
Speaker
Turkey is so easy to overcook, man.
00:36:32
Speaker
Yeah, but if you get good turkey, it's real.
00:36:34
Speaker
There's not a lot of people in my family that are good at cooking.
00:36:38
Speaker
My mom makes the oven turkey for, like, tradition's sake, and then starting, like, six or seven years ago, I started doing a smoked turkey, and it's changed the holiday for the better.
00:36:47
Speaker
We get our turkey from, like, a barbecue place in Houston.
00:36:50
Speaker
Like, we just order it.
00:36:51
Speaker
Well, then, yeah, of course it's fucking delicious.
00:36:53
Speaker
Yeah, exactly.
00:36:54
Speaker
I think Austin speaking from a place of privilege once again.
00:36:57
Speaker
No, I'm telling you to upgrade your fucking life, dude.
00:37:00
Speaker
It's extremely risky.
00:37:01
Speaker
It's not hard.
00:37:02
Speaker
Easter is not for ham either.
00:37:04
Speaker
It's for barbacoa and I stand by that down here.
00:37:06
Speaker
I mean, I love barbacoa.
00:37:07
Speaker
Easter is for fucking deviled eggs and I will not have your woke fucking table at Easter.
00:37:12
Speaker
Easter is for going with one of your best friends to church for the first time in four years and then going to Chewy's and ordering the exact same thing.
00:37:19
Speaker
And they bring him out the veggie version.
00:37:22
Speaker
And then you both get way too drunk on two Mexican martinis.
00:37:26
Speaker
That's exactly right.
00:37:27
Speaker
Sounds like a great day.
00:37:29
Speaker
Easter is for watching the Passion of the Christ with your dad and trying not to laugh.
00:37:35
Speaker
They really beat the shit out of that guy.
00:37:36
Speaker
Wow.
00:37:38
Speaker
Dude, give him a break.
00:37:40
Speaker
He's already dead.
00:37:42
Speaker
When I was a kid, I got Jim Caviezel's name mixed up with Evel Knievel.
00:37:48
Speaker
What did you guys think about that Evel Knievel Jesus movie?
00:37:51
Speaker
Isn't that crazy?
00:37:52
Speaker
You guys were watching the County Monte Cristo.
00:37:56
Speaker
Is it County Monte Cristo?
00:37:57
Speaker
It's County Monte Cristo.
00:37:58
Speaker
No, it's County Monte Cristo.
00:38:00
Speaker
It's funny how relevant... He's also in that, so...
00:38:04
Speaker
And Sound of Freedom, lest we forget.
00:38:07
Speaker
It's funny how relevant he was in the culture.
00:38:10
Speaker
And now I feel like nobody under the age of 24 could tell you who Jim Cabizel is.
00:38:14
Speaker
Well, it's funny because I was told that playing Jesus ruined his career because of Woke or something.
00:38:22
Speaker
No, it's because he's a fucking insane piece of shit.
00:38:25
Speaker
Yeah, he fucking sucks.
00:38:27
Speaker
He's terrible.
00:38:29
Speaker
And you can also say that shit.
00:38:30
Speaker
He is the person that most of the anti-Mel Gibson energy should be directed to.
00:38:35
Speaker
Yeah.
00:38:36
Speaker
He also played Jesus at the height of the Bush presidency.
00:38:40
Speaker
That movie made an insane amount of money.
00:38:43
Speaker
It was the highest grossing movie of its year by like a metric ton.
00:38:47
Speaker
It's like crazy.
00:38:48
Speaker
Dude, he didn't get canceled because of woke.
00:38:51
Speaker
It was that he just he was like, yeah, I'm super religious now.
00:38:55
Speaker
So he just intentionally ruined his own career.
00:38:58
Speaker
Well, the thing I made Jim could be.
00:39:01
Speaker
Yeah.
00:39:02
Speaker
Well, the thing about the reason why people aren't more mad at Jim Caviezel and they are mad at Mel Gibson is because of what I said, where like nobody knows who he is.
00:39:10
Speaker
The vitriolic generation can still come from Mel Gibson because he's still kind of relevant.
00:39:14
Speaker
I would also contribute some of the Mel Gibson hatred to the recorded phone call where he says slurs.
00:39:19
Speaker
Well, you know.
00:39:20
Speaker
I mean, for fun.
00:39:23
Speaker
The point is, Mel Gibson's a much bigger deal than Jim Caviezel ever was or will be.
00:39:27
Speaker
Speaking of slurs, did you guys see Jason Kelsey call that guy an F-slur?
00:39:32
Speaker
I'm sorry, the perfect way to start a sentence, speaking of slurs.
00:39:35
Speaker
In the coolest way, in a way that everybody's on his side.
00:39:39
Speaker
Basically, Jason Kelsey was at a football game.
00:39:41
Speaker
I don't know if it was college or pro or whatever.
00:39:42
Speaker
He's at a Penn State game.
00:39:43
Speaker
He's at a Penn State game, and he's walking up to his box or something, and a guy runs up to him with a phone and is like, hey, your brother's an F-slur for dating Taylor Swift.
00:39:52
Speaker
How do you think about that?
00:39:53
Speaker
And Jason Kelsey grabs the guy's phone and smashes it into the ground and asks him, who's the F-slur now?
00:39:58
Speaker
He just yells it at him.
00:39:59
Speaker
Yeah, it works because he's taking this guy who thinks he's doing the most macho move you can do to the most macho dude on the planet, and then just gets checked for what his idea of being a badass is.
00:40:11
Speaker
You can't alpha a...
00:40:13
Speaker
What is he, like, six?
00:40:14
Speaker
Like, NFL lineman.
00:40:15
Speaker
He's, like, six, seven, 300 pounds.
00:40:16
Speaker
He's, like, six, seven, 300 pounds.
00:40:17
Speaker
He's, like, with a dude that can carry an 18 rack of beer and an open beer in one hand while drinking the beer.
00:40:23
Speaker
Which is, like, yeah.
00:40:24
Speaker
Honestly, one of the coolest moves of all time.
00:40:27
Speaker
It's almost as good as Dwayne The Rock Johnson drinking straight from the six-pack in Southland Hills.
00:40:32
Speaker
To put it in perspective, Jason Kelsey, for his entire career and even at the draft, is they said he was undersized to play center, and then he finished his career being perhaps...
00:40:43
Speaker
arguably the top three greatest player at his position, despite being undersized for his position.
00:40:49
Speaker
So Austin got visibly more uncomfortable.
00:40:53
Speaker
Well, I was going to say, I had the under on Southland Tales gets mentioned within an hour.
00:41:00
Speaker
I just want to take credit for that.
00:41:01
Speaker
Okay?
00:41:02
Speaker
I had the under.
00:41:03
Speaker
I won.
00:41:04
Speaker
So I just want everybody to know.
00:41:06
Speaker
Let's redo Southland Tales, replace The Rock with Jason Kelsey and see where it goes.
00:41:10
Speaker
Well, I know that we said this was just going to be a four guys talking episode, but I literally read that text is Southland Tales will come up.
00:41:20
Speaker
That's how I read that text.
00:41:22
Speaker
So I just... This is actually an annoyance I have with Southland Tales right now.
00:41:26
Speaker
Oh?
00:41:27
Speaker
Is that I bought the Arrow Blu-ray version of it, but it's not the one with the director's cut, which is such bullshit.
00:41:32
Speaker
Oh, that sucks.
00:41:33
Speaker
And I'm going to have to buy another disc so I can get the director's cut.
00:41:36
Speaker
I just... I want...
00:41:38
Speaker
So the way you started that was, this is my problem with Southland Tales right now.
00:41:42
Speaker
And I'm just picturing like every night, you know, you go to bed, you say your prayers, you maybe read a chapter of a book, and then you consider, okay, what does Southland Tales mean to me today?
00:41:51
Speaker
I mean, you're not far off.
00:41:52
Speaker
What does it mean in my life?
00:41:54
Speaker
Yeah, I'm sure you do.
00:41:56
Speaker
It's just like the last thought you have before bed is just like, what does Southland Tales mean to me today?
00:42:02
Speaker
Southland Tales did to my brain what that car does to the other car in Southland Tales.
00:42:09
Speaker
Jesus Christ.
00:42:11
Speaker
I went to open up my browser because I was going to look for something else and I forgot that I had looked up the gross for Passion of the Christ.
00:42:19
Speaker
Nice.
00:42:20
Speaker
You had a jump scare?
00:42:22
Speaker
Dude.
00:42:23
Speaker
I'll tell you what's gross.
00:42:24
Speaker
All the blood.
00:42:25
Speaker
Yeah.
00:42:26
Speaker
Passion of the Christ is the highest grossing rated R film of that year.
00:42:32
Speaker
Okay.
00:42:33
Speaker
It was just, in terms of domestic box office, it missed out.
00:42:37
Speaker
Shrek 2 was the highest grossing film of the year.
00:42:39
Speaker
Oh, classic.
00:42:39
Speaker
But it's a kid's movie.
00:42:41
Speaker
It's a kid's movie, so obviously it's going to make a shit ton of money.
00:42:43
Speaker
Spider-Man 2 outgrossed it domestically by only $3 million.
00:42:48
Speaker
That's insane.
00:42:49
Speaker
Spider-Man 2 was $373 million domestic.
00:42:50
Speaker
Passion of the Christ, $370 million domestic.
00:42:52
Speaker
$611 million worldwide.
00:42:58
Speaker
That's nuts, man.
00:42:59
Speaker
I want to know what Connor O'Malley's character in Rap World thinks about Passion of the Christ.
00:43:04
Speaker
Put it in the chat GPT.
00:43:05
Speaker
It was in theaters for 44 weeks.
00:43:10
Speaker
Yeah, because churches kept selling it out.
00:43:13
Speaker
Yeah, taking charter buses.
00:43:15
Speaker
Which is just so crazy to me.
00:43:17
Speaker
Like, I remember having it on DVD, and I'm just like, why do y'all like this?
00:43:23
Speaker
I should make my name as a director by, like, making Christian films where I just, like, sneak communism into the messaging.
00:43:29
Speaker
Yeah, well, on that note... You'd be good at it.
00:43:31
Speaker
I mean, Jesus Christ was... Pete Holmes is perfect for the best Christmas pageant ever movie, or, like, that role, but I don't know how I feel about that movie.
00:43:40
Speaker
I don't know what the fuck you're talking about.
00:43:41
Speaker
You don't know what I'm talking about?
00:43:43
Speaker
You haven't seen these trailers, Joe?
00:43:44
Speaker
These trailers are in every movie I go to for the past month.
00:43:47
Speaker
It's like Judy Greer, Pete Holmes.
00:43:49
Speaker
I mean, I love Judy Greer.
00:43:51
Speaker
Yeah, they're in like a Christian movie about like a Christmas pageant or something.
00:43:54
Speaker
Pete Holmes has gotten like weirdly religious lately.
00:43:57
Speaker
I fuck with it.
00:43:59
Speaker
The book is a classic.
00:44:00
Speaker
I don't know the book at all.
00:44:01
Speaker
Hyper evangelical.
00:44:03
Speaker
Yeah, you can't get away from that shit.
00:44:05
Speaker
If you grew up, it's always going to be there.
00:44:07
Speaker
Well, here's the reason I bring it up is because I actually love that book and it was a big part of my childhood.
00:44:13
Speaker
Okay, I don't know.
00:44:14
Speaker
The person in charge of the movie is also the person that created The Chosen, which has the strangest cult following.
00:44:25
Speaker
Yeah, dude, one of the disciples has autism in The Chosen and they explain it.
00:44:31
Speaker
Like the one that's a tax collector has like Rain Man autism.
00:44:34
Speaker
Matthew?
00:44:35
Speaker
Yeah.
00:44:37
Speaker
Matthew has like Rain Man autism.
00:44:39
Speaker
He has like a superpower where he can do taxes really fast.
00:44:43
Speaker
Isn't the Chosen just for people who want to fuck Jesus?
00:44:47
Speaker
I mean, it's just people who want to be like, Jesus is hot.
00:44:50
Speaker
Also, Peter's like a bad boy.
00:44:53
Speaker
He's basically wearing leather jackets.
00:44:55
Speaker
I mean, it's a very funny show if you go into it thinking this is a hilarious, absurdist send-up of the Christ's narrative.
00:45:03
Speaker
When he's really bad, does Jesus call him Simon?
00:45:05
Speaker
Like a mom.
00:45:07
Speaker
He's like, Simon.
00:45:08
Speaker
He's like, that's not my name anymore.
00:45:09
Speaker
The closest theater to my apartment plays episodes of The Chosen three at a time every single week.
00:45:16
Speaker
Dude, that shit makes money hand over fist.
00:45:21
Speaker
Anytime there's a faith-based film, it's the most crowded I see our cinema.
00:45:24
Speaker
Faith-based films seem like money laundering to me.
00:45:28
Speaker
That's why I need Joss help to make Youth Group the movie.
00:45:33
Speaker
I can shit on some youth groups.
00:45:35
Speaker
I mean like a snack shack style movie about a youth group.
00:45:38
Speaker
That's exactly it.
00:45:39
Speaker
It would fucking kill man.
00:45:40
Speaker
Zach's been working on the script for like four years.
00:45:42
Speaker
It would kill with all of the ex-Christian gays.
00:45:45
Speaker
Like they would love that shit.
00:45:47
Speaker
100%.
00:45:48
Speaker
Or just ex-Christians.
00:45:49
Speaker
Yeah I was about to say the ex-Christian gays, the ex-Christian girls and Joe.
00:45:53
Speaker
I think I mentioned this to at least one of y'all, but my idea for the opening of this movie is like a Seinfeld style comedy bit, but it's like John Crist.
00:46:02
Speaker
Nice.
00:46:03
Speaker
I fucking hate that guy.
00:46:05
Speaker
I really like that.
00:46:06
Speaker
That's exactly why.
00:46:07
Speaker
I hate him.
00:46:08
Speaker
Okay, I will need you to cut this.
00:46:16
Speaker
You said that with the exact same intonation as my favorite Wes Anderson line of all time.
00:46:21
Speaker
Oh, please.
00:46:21
Speaker
Bottle Rocket, where Owen Wilson from The Kitchen goes, how does an asshole like him get a kitchen like this?
00:46:28
Speaker
That's a really great line.
00:46:30
Speaker
I really love that.
00:46:31
Speaker
Bottle Rocket is a sleeper.
00:46:35
Speaker
That's a great movie.
00:46:35
Speaker
It's pretty fucking cool.
00:46:37
Speaker
It's one of the funniest.
00:46:37
Speaker
Shout out to Houston.
00:46:38
Speaker
Like one of the straight up funniest Wes Anderson movies.
00:46:41
Speaker
There's so many just great comedic lines in that movie.
00:46:45
Speaker
And you can kind of see where Wes Anderson is going, but it's nice to see a version of him that isn't so quirky.
00:46:51
Speaker
Yeah.
00:46:52
Speaker
You know, I really, I really want to rewatch Budapest after seeing conclave.
00:46:56
Speaker
Just like watch, watch finds just like owning his shit.
00:46:59
Speaker
The thing that I kept thinking when I was watching conclave is dude, I want a horror movie in the Vatican.
00:47:05
Speaker
Totally.
00:47:06
Speaker
Totally.
00:47:06
Speaker
Like the modern Vatican, like the one that they show.
00:47:09
Speaker
It's crazy.
00:47:10
Speaker
Like vaping and talk and like having cell phones and like being on charter buses.
00:47:15
Speaker
And there's a very funny shot of like a really old Cardinal on a red iPhone.
00:47:19
Speaker
Yeah.
00:47:20
Speaker
It really got me.
00:47:21
Speaker
That whole scene is really amazing.
00:47:23
Speaker
That whole kind of montage.
00:47:24
Speaker
Extra world building stuff.
00:47:25
Speaker
Yeah.
00:47:25
Speaker
That's the same scene where they show 10 dozen cigarette butts on the ground.
00:47:29
Speaker
Yeah, exactly.
00:47:30
Speaker
It's incredible.
Discovering Tubi: Film Picks and Discussions
00:47:32
Speaker
I'm also interested to watch.
00:47:34
Speaker
I love Fiennes.
00:47:35
Speaker
I've loved Fiennes for a long time.
00:47:36
Speaker
He's fucking amazing.
00:47:38
Speaker
He's going to get an Oscar nomination for this.
00:47:40
Speaker
I can basically get into it.
00:47:42
Speaker
I think he should have won for Budapest, personally.
00:47:44
Speaker
Oh, yeah.
00:47:44
Speaker
I agree.
00:47:45
Speaker
He's absolutely heartbreaking in that movie.
00:47:47
Speaker
I think Budapest is his best performance, is, I think, my favorite performance in any Wes Anderson movie, even as a Wes obsessive
00:47:55
Speaker
It's that or Gene Hackman for me.
00:47:57
Speaker
Like, yeah.
00:47:58
Speaker
Yeah.
00:47:59
Speaker
Like I like Joe falls asleep every night thinking about Southland Tales.
00:48:05
Speaker
I fall asleep every night thinking let's shag ass.
00:48:07
Speaker
Let's check.
00:48:08
Speaker
Yeah, that's a great.
00:48:08
Speaker
I think about I think about I'm very sorry.
00:48:11
Speaker
I'm very sorry to hear about your mother.
00:48:13
Speaker
She's a terribly beautiful woman.
00:48:15
Speaker
It's an incredible the fact that he did that, like the fact that Wes got him and Gene Hackman was like, yeah,
00:48:23
Speaker
it like pretty much like a few years before he retired is just like that's the king right there that's the go and and then proceeded to hate west the entire time yeah which is fine i mean i think that more i mean it's the same it's the same thing as the uh as the reynolds thing and boogie nights yeah exactly yeah it's like okay you got a great performance dog like go off yeah you never worked that person again but who cares i think hating your director is kind of like fuel for acting
00:48:52
Speaker
I like that It only works for some people though It's not going to work for every movie But in some movies Like the fucking Texas Chainsaw Massacre guy The guy who played The one that wasn't in the I think it was the hitchhiker guy that was like If I ever see Toby Hooper Kill him I think it's like For a person like Gene Hackman He probably came up with a lot of
00:49:19
Speaker
antagonistic filmmakers.
00:49:21
Speaker
So you're like, okay, you probably had like, you're probably just very used to having really shitty relationships.
00:49:26
Speaker
Yeah.
00:49:27
Speaker
Like Friedkin's an asshole.
00:49:28
Speaker
I love him, but he's mean as shit.
00:49:31
Speaker
Yeah.
00:49:31
Speaker
He never, he never really like repeated actors in his movies.
00:49:34
Speaker
And I wonder why.
00:49:36
Speaker
outside of like scheider i think yeah that's true that's true that's a good call oh i'm thinking also an asshole i'm not i'm thinking of dreyfus scheider is fine like dreyfus is the one that turned out to be a fucking weirdo yeah dreyfus is like a fucking asshole transphobe oh cool he sucks i think i think scheider died long before scheider and schneider both uh transphobes
00:49:58
Speaker
yeah no not shiner's not a transphobe dry pisses i saw i'm not like schneider as in rob schneider oh sorry i think it's a shider shider and schneider okay there's a rob schneider bit that popped up on my twitter feed today or yesterday that was like the worst comedy but i've ever seen he was like trying to do all of kamala's like different accents oh come on man you know he's still good though as far as i know david spade
00:50:23
Speaker
Yeah, I think David Spade is like... I think if he just stays quiet about what he believes, I'm... Yeah, exactly.
00:50:29
Speaker
He's not being a public asshole.
00:50:30
Speaker
He just plays fucking golf all day, every day.
00:50:32
Speaker
Cool.
00:50:32
Speaker
That's what I want to do.
00:50:34
Speaker
I don't really like golf, but... There's this story... If I can play, like, Magic the Gathering or something.
00:50:38
Speaker
Yeah, totally.
00:50:39
Speaker
There was a story on... I reference this podcast every week because I love it.
00:50:42
Speaker
But there was a...
00:50:44
Speaker
story on the lonely island podcast where seth myers is seth myers is from the same hometown as sandler um and he like went home to like see somebody they're like sandler was just here so he texted sandler was like hey like i'm back home just wanted to say like everybody was talking about you everything's good and he was like oh thanks man like i can't text right now i'm driving and myers is like okay yeah eyes on the road and sandler just texts back just hit two deer and spade all good and
00:51:12
Speaker
It sucks to be that Sandler is so cool and seemingly such a chill, nice person.
00:51:18
Speaker
And it's like, I get that you can't abandon your friends, but stop bringing Schneider into your stuff.
00:51:23
Speaker
Yeah, yeah.
00:51:24
Speaker
And I think he kind of has now.
00:51:27
Speaker
Dude, he was in his special.
00:51:28
Speaker
He was in Love You.
00:51:29
Speaker
Oh, really?
00:51:30
Speaker
I still haven't watched it.
00:51:31
Speaker
Damn, that sucks.
00:51:32
Speaker
Oh, you gotta watch it.
00:51:33
Speaker
The bit itself was really funny, and I hate to admit it, but the bit is just Schneider doing a full song as Elvis.
00:51:42
Speaker
Oh, that's good.
00:51:43
Speaker
No jokes, he just does an Elvis song.
00:51:46
Speaker
That's funny.
00:51:49
Speaker
Can we... Yeah, you guys want a Tubi draft?
00:51:52
Speaker
Tubi draft?
00:51:53
Speaker
Okay.
00:51:53
Speaker
Tubi.
00:51:55
Speaker
I want to explain something really quick about Tubi.
00:51:57
Speaker
Can we harmonize the Tubi theme first?
00:52:00
Speaker
Tubi.
00:52:03
Speaker
Tubi.
00:52:04
Speaker
Tubi.
00:52:06
Speaker
Hold on.
00:52:07
Speaker
Let me get the draft order going while I look in bed.
00:52:09
Speaker
Tubi is... Well, I just put the mic on my chest.
00:52:12
Speaker
Tubi is the people's streaming service.
00:52:14
Speaker
100%.
00:52:14
Speaker
It's my favorite place to find new movies because there's just fucking wild shit on there.
00:52:19
Speaker
It's all... There's not... There's never a night where you could go on Tubi and not find something you wanted to watch.
00:52:26
Speaker
Absolutely.
00:52:27
Speaker
Joe, do you want to lay out what we're doing here?
00:52:29
Speaker
Yeah, sure.
00:52:31
Speaker
So basically, next week's episode is going to be called It Came From Tubi.
00:52:36
Speaker
And basically, because we all love Tubi so much, and there's just such an insane catalog on there, what we're going to do is the four of us are each going to draft three movies from Tubi to watch and discuss next Thursday or next Monday.
00:52:50
Speaker
with the timeline.
00:52:51
Speaker
Whenever the podcast comes out.
00:52:51
Speaker
If you're listening to this saying, oh damn, I don't have Tubi.
00:52:54
Speaker
Yeah, you do.
00:52:56
Speaker
It's free.
00:52:57
Speaker
Get in there, dickhead.
00:52:58
Speaker
Kill yourself.
00:53:01
Speaker
Sign up to save progress.
00:53:07
Speaker
How we're doing it is we have some stipulations on what we can draft.
00:53:10
Speaker
They are one movie from pre-1950, one movie from 1950 to 1975, and one movie from 1975 to the present.
00:53:20
Speaker
And I think that is a great way to showcase the depth, the insane depth of the catalog on Tubi.
00:53:27
Speaker
So once we get a draft order, we're going to go through them.
00:53:28
Speaker
We're each going to pick three movies.
00:53:32
Speaker
We can pick any category at any time, right?
00:53:34
Speaker
Sure.
00:53:35
Speaker
Like I can just go like crazy.
00:53:36
Speaker
Here's my thing.
00:53:37
Speaker
Because of the depth of the catalog,
00:53:40
Speaker
It is going to be shocking to me.
00:53:42
Speaker
I truly shocking if any of us have overlap in our picks.
00:53:45
Speaker
Like if somebody's like, fuck, I wanted that one.
00:53:47
Speaker
But if it does happen, I'm going to be so excited.
00:53:50
Speaker
I think it's equally as likely that all of us have overlap.
00:53:55
Speaker
Well, that's also fair.
00:53:56
Speaker
That's also fair.
00:53:57
Speaker
We are sickos.
00:53:59
Speaker
There's one in particular.
00:54:00
Speaker
Yeah, what's the draft order?
00:54:02
Speaker
One quick thing before we do draft order.
00:54:04
Speaker
If I get the picks I want, it's going to have the theme, and then we can talk about the theme.
00:54:09
Speaker
Oh, mine don't, but that's cool.
00:54:12
Speaker
I had an idea.
00:54:12
Speaker
Mine don't because I'm cool and interesting and different.
00:54:14
Speaker
Shut the fuck up.
00:54:16
Speaker
Yeah, Red, listen to Phoebe Bridgers, you dumb misogynist.
00:54:20
Speaker
Hold on, I just recently retold this story and I have to tell it because Zach is here.
00:54:24
Speaker
Zach and I had a period of time of which we were lifting together at our local YMCA.
00:54:28
Speaker
Beautiful.
00:54:29
Speaker
I know.
00:54:30
Speaker
Alpha.
00:54:30
Speaker
Someone get Andrew Tate on the cast right now.
00:54:34
Speaker
I gotta know what his favorite movie is.
00:54:36
Speaker
Oh, dude, we were beefy boys.
00:54:37
Speaker
We were getting up at like 5.30 a.m.
00:54:38
Speaker
and just getting after it.
00:54:40
Speaker
It was awesome.
00:54:41
Speaker
It was really fun.
00:54:43
Speaker
And we started this relatively soon after an album called Punisher by Phoebe Bridges was released.
00:54:51
Speaker
And there was one day where if I remember correctly, I was either hitting bench or incline bench and Zach was spotting for me and my phone was on the ground.
00:55:03
Speaker
and I had my AirPods in, and Zach tapped it, and I was listening to Garden Song by Phoebe Bridgers while I was hitting bench.
00:55:10
Speaker
On the bench?
00:55:11
Speaker
He was grunting, maxing out to Garden Song.
00:55:14
Speaker
Hell yeah, man.
00:55:17
Speaker
And I was spotting, like you said, and I just started fucking fell to my knees laughing.
00:55:22
Speaker
I had DMX in my earphones or something like, let's fucking go.
00:55:31
Speaker
You're listening to Method Man and Red's listening to Faye Webster.
00:55:35
Speaker
Honestly, it was like so nice because I was like, I was miserable just like waiting for the endorphins to kick in.
00:55:45
Speaker
And so like the thought of music that was not like super aggressive was really nice.
00:55:51
Speaker
Adam and I regularly would hit.
00:55:54
Speaker
Well, I would watch Adam do this.
00:55:55
Speaker
I would be my version of hitting PR is like, I don't know, like 45 pounds.
00:56:00
Speaker
Yeah.
00:56:01
Speaker
But Adam, I would regularly hit PRs to any number of the Naruto theme songs.
00:56:08
Speaker
That makes a lot of sense.
00:56:09
Speaker
That's the most Adam shit I've ever heard.
00:56:11
Speaker
It would also make sense if you told me he climaxed in the middle of that.
00:56:15
Speaker
I wouldn't put it past him.
00:56:16
Speaker
Brother is ho nay.
00:56:18
Speaker
While we're talking about me and Red's gym experience, here's one other funny thing that happened in particular where we're sitting in the dry sauna after a workout.
00:56:27
Speaker
And just like people were chatty Cathy's in the Waco sauna at the Y.
00:56:34
Speaker
and there's this one kid who's like he's just talking he's like trying to make it as a career as a photographer he's just like talking about music and stuff he's like what do you like i'm like i kind of listen a little bit of everything man he's like yeah dude i'm into some like
00:56:49
Speaker
pretty obscure shit like uh and i was like oh for real like like this sounds like just a made-up bit but this motherfucker literally looks me dead in the eyes and he goes like yeah i don't know if you've heard of them uh this guy named tamin paula shut the fuck up i was there joe it had because because i if i remember correctly zach was like oh i like house music
00:57:14
Speaker
And the guy's like... Yeah.
00:57:16
Speaker
And the guy's like, oh, like... He's like, oh, cool.
00:57:19
Speaker
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
00:57:19
Speaker
He's like, so, like, do you like Tame Impala?
00:57:24
Speaker
What?
00:57:25
Speaker
Do you know what house music is?
00:57:27
Speaker
That guy thinks he can get pussy by saying Tame Impala is actually one guy.
00:57:31
Speaker
Yeah, dude.
00:57:32
Speaker
It's actually Kevin Barker.
00:57:34
Speaker
Okay, Red, draft order us.
00:57:38
Speaker
Okay.
00:57:40
Speaker
Going first is Zach.
00:57:42
Speaker
Nice.
00:57:42
Speaker
Let's go.
00:57:43
Speaker
Next will be Austin.
00:57:45
Speaker
Cool.
00:57:46
Speaker
Then me.
00:57:47
Speaker
Fuck you, guys.
00:57:49
Speaker
This is fucking bullshit.
00:57:50
Speaker
Are we going to do snake?
00:57:51
Speaker
We are going to do snake order.
00:57:52
Speaker
So for the uninitiated, that means that Joe will pick back to back.
00:57:56
Speaker
Okay, never mind.
00:57:57
Speaker
That's cool as hell.
00:57:59
Speaker
Zach will have six picks in between his first and his second pick.
00:58:02
Speaker
That's cool.
00:58:03
Speaker
That's cool.
00:58:04
Speaker
Yeah.
00:58:06
Speaker
All right, here we go.
00:58:07
Speaker
Let's fucking get us rolling and we can go in any order.
00:58:10
Speaker
Yeah, you can do it.
00:58:10
Speaker
Pick whatever category you want.
00:58:12
Speaker
I mean, I'm going to start with 1975 to the present with a film called Quadrophenia.
00:58:18
Speaker
Cool.
00:58:19
Speaker
Fuck yeah.
00:58:20
Speaker
Features Sting is soundtracked by the who.
00:58:23
Speaker
Oh, shit.
00:58:24
Speaker
It's generally just a cool music movie from what I understand.
00:58:29
Speaker
It's not a music documentary from what I understand.
00:58:32
Speaker
It is also featured as a Criterion title.
00:58:35
Speaker
And I have never heard of it before.
00:58:37
Speaker
And every new thing that I learn about it has me more excited.
00:58:42
Speaker
Quadrophenia is from 1979.
00:58:47
Speaker
And the description is an angst ridden London youth escapes the drudgery of his postal job.
00:58:53
Speaker
And it's like kind of like a outsiders type movie in London about music gangs.
00:58:59
Speaker
That sounds awesome.
00:59:00
Speaker
We should say the other caveat to this whole experience is we're all picking movies we've never seen before.
00:59:04
Speaker
Yes.
00:59:04
Speaker
So we're just watching them blind.
00:59:07
Speaker
But there's a few of these that I depart from on this.
00:59:13
Speaker
This is probably the only one of my picks I've never heard of.
00:59:15
Speaker
That's fine.
00:59:16
Speaker
We're nerds.
00:59:17
Speaker
We hear of a lot of stuff.
00:59:17
Speaker
All that I've never seen.
00:59:18
Speaker
But yeah, Quadrophenia.
00:59:20
Speaker
Quadrophenia, first overall.
00:59:22
Speaker
Okay, my first pick is also going to be 1975 to the present.
00:59:25
Speaker
This is a movie I had never heard of before.
00:59:27
Speaker
I found it just scrolling the Westerns list on 2B, a great place to be.
00:59:33
Speaker
And it's called Red-Headed Stranger from 1986.
00:59:37
Speaker
It stars one Willie Nelson in the lead role.
00:59:41
Speaker
Yes, sir.
00:59:42
Speaker
What an album.
00:59:43
Speaker
Yeah, exactly.
00:59:45
Speaker
I looked this up on Letterboxd.
00:59:46
Speaker
I have no mutuals that have ever logged it.
00:59:48
Speaker
So nobody that I follow on Letterboxd has ever logged this movie.
00:59:51
Speaker
It's directed by William D. Whitliffe, a name that I'm not familiar with.
00:59:54
Speaker
But here's the here's the logline.
00:59:56
Speaker
Reverend Julian Shea, Willie Nelson, strode into the saloon, pulled out his six shooter and killed his adulterous wife and the man she had left him for.
01:00:06
Speaker
It was the beginning of his violent transformation from God loving preacher to ruthless outlaw.
01:00:11
Speaker
oh shit that sounds fucking cool as shit incredible starring willie nelson nonetheless so yeah that's my is it that's my first you know if it's pre or post album it's got to be post i think that album is like the late 70s and this is 86 um so yeah redheaded stranger starring willie nelson my first pick
01:00:33
Speaker
Oh, man.
01:00:34
Speaker
I... You know what?
01:00:37
Speaker
I think because I... It'll... I think I can keep some of these other picks because I honestly... I don't know if there's going to be any more, so I'm just going to go for this one.
01:00:50
Speaker
I'm going to go post-1975 with a little film directed by Mike Nichols from 1994 called Wolf.
01:01:00
Speaker
Oh, nice.
01:01:00
Speaker
Starring Jack Nicholson, Michelle Pfeiffer, James Spader, Richard Jenkins, Christopher Plummer, David Hyde Pierce, Ron Rifkin.
01:01:10
Speaker
Holy shit.
01:01:10
Speaker
I love Rifkin.
01:01:12
Speaker
Nice.
01:01:14
Speaker
Kate Nelligan.
01:01:14
Speaker
Nice.
01:01:16
Speaker
Can I make a confession based on that?
01:01:18
Speaker
Yeah.
01:01:18
Speaker
I don't think I've seen a James Spader performance outside of Robert California.
01:01:23
Speaker
You've never seen Sex, Lies and Videotape?
01:01:25
Speaker
Nope.
01:01:26
Speaker
I've never seen Sex, Lies and Videotape.
01:01:28
Speaker
You've got to watch Crash.
01:01:31
Speaker
Zach, next time you're here or I'm in San Antonio, remind me I'll bring you my Crash Blu-ray.
01:01:35
Speaker
Or we can just cuddle up and watch it together.
01:01:38
Speaker
I would absolutely love that.
01:01:40
Speaker
You should watch Crash either alone.
01:01:44
Speaker
Honestly, I'm intrigued to see what Crash would be like to watch with somebody you're fucking.
01:01:50
Speaker
I don't know.
01:01:52
Speaker
I would watch it alone.
01:01:54
Speaker
I that's that's like a year three of a relationship thing where you're like, we understand each other.
01:01:59
Speaker
That's like one three.
01:02:01
Speaker
No, I don't know if they can't fuck with you at your freak.
01:02:03
Speaker
Lean in.
01:02:04
Speaker
Well, OK, I respect that.
01:02:06
Speaker
I respect that.
01:02:07
Speaker
If they don't want to fuck all of your holes, both natural and unnatural.
01:02:13
Speaker
I mean, that movie did not to be weird.
01:02:17
Speaker
It got me kind of horned up.
01:02:18
Speaker
Did you guys see the Sarah Sherman bit where she was being interviewed?
01:02:21
Speaker
And they were like, fuck, marry, kill, Colin Jost, David Cronenberg, and fuck, I forgot the third guy.
01:02:29
Speaker
But basically, she said, kill Colin.
01:02:31
Speaker
And then she said, he knows he has it coming.
01:02:34
Speaker
You can ask him.
01:02:35
Speaker
And then she said, marry the third guy.
01:02:38
Speaker
I don't remember what that was.
01:02:38
Speaker
And he said, but I would fuck David Cronenberg because he has some...
01:02:42
Speaker
Really interesting ideas about sex.
01:02:46
Speaker
Indeed he does.
01:02:47
Speaker
Indeed he does.
01:02:49
Speaker
I'm just going to read the plot of the film Wolf.
01:02:53
Speaker
Publisher Will Randall, played by Jack Nicholson, becomes a demon wolf and has to fight to keep his job.
01:03:00
Speaker
Oh, that sounds amazing.
01:03:01
Speaker
I might throw that on the watch list.
01:03:02
Speaker
That sounds sick as hell.
01:03:03
Speaker
Yeah, I do like that.
01:03:05
Speaker
Directed by Mike Nichols, which I find to be kind of absurd.
01:03:08
Speaker
Love that.
01:03:09
Speaker
All right, Wolf.
01:03:11
Speaker
Love it, Wolf.
01:03:11
Speaker
On to Joe.
01:03:12
Speaker
All right, I'm going to do my opposite ends of the spectrum here.
01:03:15
Speaker
I'm going to go first 50s, and I'm going to do the presents.
01:03:18
Speaker
I'm going to leave 1975 because I know none of y'all took my 75 one.
01:03:20
Speaker
We'll see.
01:03:20
Speaker
For pre-50s, I'm going His Girl Friday.
01:03:29
Speaker
Beautiful.
01:03:30
Speaker
I've never seen it.
01:03:32
Speaker
I've never seen a Howard Hawks movie before.
01:03:34
Speaker
Wow.
01:03:35
Speaker
There you go.
01:03:35
Speaker
Love that.
01:03:36
Speaker
Legitimately awesome.
01:03:38
Speaker
So His Girl Friday in 1940, Cary Grant, Rosalind Russell.
01:03:44
Speaker
Seems like it'll be a good time for Papa.
01:03:47
Speaker
It's genuinely funny.
01:03:49
Speaker
It's genuinely funny.
01:03:50
Speaker
I think it is like kind of the urtex for what rom-coms can be.
01:03:54
Speaker
badass yeah uh and then for 75 to today i had oh man i have i want to watch i'm gonna watch all these eventually because they all seem amazing but i think i gotta go with a little film called the seventh curse okay uh and i i'm gonna butcher this guy's name i'm so sorry um it's directed by a guy named lam nai kai
01:04:17
Speaker
who also directed a movie called Ricky O, The Story of Ricky.
01:04:22
Speaker
And it's about this guy that gets sent to a prison and he has to fight the prison gangs.
01:04:28
Speaker
And he for real punches a dude's head smooth off.
01:04:33
Speaker
Sick.
01:04:34
Speaker
Smooth off.
01:04:36
Speaker
And so The Seventh Curse stars Chow Yun-Fat, who also is in... Beautiful.
01:04:41
Speaker
Fucking... Hard-boiled?
01:04:43
Speaker
Hard-boiled, thank you.
01:04:45
Speaker
I was going to say Crouching Tiger, but sure.
01:04:48
Speaker
He's an incredible actor.
01:04:49
Speaker
He's one of China's greatest action stars.
01:04:53
Speaker
Big fan of Chow Yun-Fat.
01:04:54
Speaker
It also has Maggie Chung, so...
01:04:57
Speaker
Love her.
01:04:58
Speaker
What a... The plot summary is this.
01:05:00
Speaker
It's an old-school fantasy adventure follows Dr. Yuen and Mr. Wisely as they fight to release a curse, battling evil sorcerers and bloodthirsty creatures.
01:05:09
Speaker
Beautiful.
01:05:10
Speaker
Sounds fucking sick.
01:05:11
Speaker
From 1986.
01:05:12
Speaker
Yeah, Tubi does not know how to categorize this movie.
01:05:16
Speaker
The genres says, action, horror, fantasy, and foreign slash international.
01:05:21
Speaker
Okay.
01:05:22
Speaker
Sounds like it's got all of those things.
01:05:24
Speaker
And it's an hour and 20 minutes.
01:05:26
Speaker
Incredible.
01:05:26
Speaker
I don't know how they're going to pack all that in an hour.
01:05:28
Speaker
You're really valuing your time, Joe.
01:05:30
Speaker
I respect that.
01:05:30
Speaker
I usually do.
01:05:32
Speaker
Yeah.
01:05:32
Speaker
Unless it's Southland Towers, and then I watched it two times in one weekend.
01:05:37
Speaker
Hey, that's a different kind of value right there.
01:05:38
Speaker
What's your next pick, Brett?
01:05:39
Speaker
No, you have the next pick.
01:05:41
Speaker
I picked two.
01:05:42
Speaker
Oh, you picked both.
01:05:43
Speaker
I'm sorry.
01:05:43
Speaker
You picked your pre-1950.
01:05:44
Speaker
I'm sorry.
01:05:45
Speaker
I forgot.
01:05:46
Speaker
I forgot.
01:05:47
Speaker
I am going to go with a Robert Aldrich film from 1953.
01:05:49
Speaker
I'm sorry, 1962.
01:05:52
Speaker
I read that wrong.
01:05:55
Speaker
It's called Whatever Happened to Baby Jane?
01:05:57
Speaker
It's on my watch list.
01:06:01
Speaker
Victor Buono Wesley Addy and Barton's in this movie fuck yeah here is the log line a former vaudeville child star torments her paraplegic sister who eclipsed her as a movie star in their decaying Hollywood mansion while desperately clinging to hopes of a comeback IMDB lists this as a psychological horror psychological thriller drama horror thriller is it Jane Crawford is that who's in it or who's in it
01:06:28
Speaker
It's Joan Crawford and Betty Davis.
01:06:29
Speaker
Joan Crawford, Betty Davis.
01:06:31
Speaker
Beautiful.
01:06:33
Speaker
Excited to hear about that one.
01:06:34
Speaker
It's been on my watch list pretty much ever since I started my Tubi account.
01:06:37
Speaker
Okay, my second pick.
01:06:40
Speaker
I'm going to go 1950 to 1975 for my second pick.
01:06:45
Speaker
Little movie starring one Elvis Presley and one Anne Margaret called Viva Las Vegas, which I have heard of.
01:06:53
Speaker
I've never seen any Elvis movies.
01:06:55
Speaker
I've never seen any of his screen work.
01:06:57
Speaker
I've seen the movie Elvis, not a fan, but I have not seen any of Elvis's acting roles.
01:07:04
Speaker
And so I wanted to kind of dip my toe into his career.
01:07:08
Speaker
Logline on Viva Las Vegas is as he prepares for the Las Vegas Grand Prix.
01:07:12
Speaker
Lucky tries to secure funds for a new engine while winning the affections of a hotel swim instructor.
01:07:18
Speaker
And you're telling me Ann-Margaret plays a hotel swim instructor?
01:07:23
Speaker
Sign on me up.
01:07:24
Speaker
I'm there.
01:07:24
Speaker
God bless her.
01:07:25
Speaker
I love her.
01:07:27
Speaker
So yeah, Elvis Presley and Margaret, William Demarest, 1964.
01:07:31
Speaker
It's a musical.
01:07:32
Speaker
So excited about that.
01:07:33
Speaker
We're starting to have a musical in there.
01:07:34
Speaker
Yeah.
01:07:35
Speaker
Viva Las Vegas, my second pick.
01:07:39
Speaker
And Zach, you got Dose picks.
01:07:41
Speaker
So I got Dose.
01:07:42
Speaker
All right, I'll do the 50 to 75 pick first.
01:07:46
Speaker
That will be...
01:07:49
Speaker
Antonioni's Blow Up.
01:07:51
Speaker
Dude, it was on my list.
01:07:53
Speaker
Yep.
01:07:54
Speaker
I told you there would be some overlap.
01:07:56
Speaker
I haven't seen Blow Up, but it sounds, from what I've heard, kind of like almost a reimagining of Rear Window in some ways, conceptually, that goes a little bit darker and weird into
Classic Horror and Directors
01:08:07
Speaker
some fashion blowout.
01:08:07
Speaker
You know what?
01:08:07
Speaker
Have you seen De Palma's Blow Out?
01:08:09
Speaker
Yeah.
01:08:10
Speaker
Huh?
01:08:11
Speaker
Have you seen De Palma's Blow Out?
01:08:13
Speaker
Yeah, I love Blow Out.
01:08:14
Speaker
That's a remake of Blow Up.
01:08:16
Speaker
Okay, perfect.
01:08:17
Speaker
Makes me even more excited for it.
01:08:19
Speaker
So yeah, Blow Up is my 1575, and then my pre-1950 pick is The Old Dark House, which is like the OG horror comedy that is like... Oh, cool.
01:08:33
Speaker
Oh, cool.
01:08:33
Speaker
Yeah.
01:08:34
Speaker
It's, from what I've heard, has moments that are genuinely scary for a movie from 1932.
01:08:40
Speaker
But then also it's kind of just like gags and jokes and almost like a Three Stooges or Abbott and Costello comedy bit that takes place in a haunted house.
01:08:52
Speaker
So that'll be a fun one, I think, directed by James Whale, who I do not know.
01:08:58
Speaker
He directed the original Frankenstein.
01:09:00
Speaker
And Bride of Frankenstein.
01:09:02
Speaker
And The Invisible Man.
01:09:03
Speaker
Perfect.
01:09:03
Speaker
Yeah, he was like Universal's stock horror guy.
01:09:07
Speaker
Well, they had a lot of those original.
01:09:08
Speaker
Yeah, but he made a lot of those early monsters.
01:09:10
Speaker
Cause of death, suicide.
01:09:11
Speaker
Okay.
01:09:13
Speaker
He was a fucked up guy.
01:09:14
Speaker
There's the movie...
01:09:18
Speaker
uh i think it's a brian singer movie so don't maybe not the best person indoors but it's called gods and monsters and it's ian mckellen playing james whale like towards the end of his life really a movie i liked when i was 17. that's uh bernan frazier's in that movie too right yeah he is yeah yeah very good very good young frazier right do you all want me to round out nomination and reiterate them or do we want to do that after we'll do that at the end yeah is that cool
01:09:44
Speaker
Okay, my final pick from pre-1950.
01:09:47
Speaker
This wouldn't have been my first pick, but it's thematic to what I want to do.
01:09:53
Speaker
I'll tell my other idea first for another theme was I wanted to try to track one actor through all three phases.
01:10:01
Speaker
But I couldn't I the only person I could really find to do it with was Henry Fonda.
01:10:06
Speaker
And I wasn't all that interested in the movies that were on there.
01:10:09
Speaker
There wasn't enough like Jimmy Stewart movies.
01:10:11
Speaker
Sorry, my phone just started
Thematic Movie Picks and Genres
01:10:12
Speaker
playing a movie.
01:10:13
Speaker
They there was enough like Jimmy Stewart movies throughout time to really do it.
01:10:17
Speaker
So my pick in this will reveal my opinion.
01:10:22
Speaker
theme that I did choose is 1949's A Connecticut Yankee in King Arthur's Court, which is a classic musical directed by Tay Garnett, starring Bing Crosby and Rhonda Fleming, Cedric Hardwick and William Bendix.
01:10:37
Speaker
Based on the Twain book, yeah.
01:10:39
Speaker
yeah yeah so when a 20th century mechanic wakes up from a head injury in camelot in the year 528 he scraps with lancelot wins the princess and saves the king so my when i found the first movie i found to draft was that willie nelson movie and i was like what if i tried to like track movies that star primarily musicians like but it's like that their main actor is primarily a musician so bink rosby elvis and willie nelson
01:11:06
Speaker
are the three.
01:11:07
Speaker
So yeah, Connecticut Yankee and King Arthur's Court.
01:11:11
Speaker
Very nice.
01:11:13
Speaker
Well, my final pick.
01:11:16
Speaker
Sorry, I'm going pre-1950 and I am going to draft the Charles Vidor movie Gilda starring Rita Hayworth from 1946.
01:11:28
Speaker
I had never even heard of this film, but Tubi has a whole film noir category and I was like, I haven't watched enough noir in my life.
01:11:36
Speaker
I almost added that one or Gidget.
01:11:42
Speaker
The logline, a small-time gambler hired to work at a Buenos Aires casino discovers his employer's new wife as his former lover.
01:11:51
Speaker
Nice.
01:11:52
Speaker
Sounds good.
01:11:54
Speaker
Love it.
01:11:55
Speaker
That's like peak German Buenos Aires, too.
01:11:58
Speaker
Oh, sick.
01:12:00
Speaker
Very nice.
01:12:00
Speaker
The good times.
01:12:02
Speaker
Yeah.
01:12:04
Speaker
Nazi, Nazi, Nazi.
01:12:07
Speaker
Yes.
01:12:10
Speaker
My final pick in the 70s era is a little spaghetti western I had never even heard of before called They Called Me Trinity.
01:12:20
Speaker
Yeah, I saw that.
01:12:21
Speaker
I saw that on the western list.
01:12:22
Speaker
I did too.
01:12:22
Speaker
Directed by Enzo Barboni, which if you asked me to come up with a name for it.
01:12:27
Speaker
Yeah, I was about to say, if you asked me to come up with a name of an Italian guy, that's probably like the first two things that would come out of my mouth.
01:12:32
Speaker
Dominic DiCocco.
01:12:34
Speaker
Was DiCaprio's character from Once Upon a Time in Hollywood in this movie?
01:12:37
Speaker
Yeah, probably.
01:12:39
Speaker
Fucking, what's his name?
01:12:40
Speaker
I forget.
01:12:42
Speaker
I remember one of the titles, though, of one of the Spaghetti Westerns, which was...
01:12:48
Speaker
It's called like Red Blood, Red Heart.
01:12:50
Speaker
And they're like, oh yeah, the studio changed it from any... The only good Indian is a dead Indian.
01:12:57
Speaker
Which is such a good joke.
01:13:00
Speaker
But the plot summary of this movie is...
01:13:05
Speaker
A bounty hunter and his outlaw brother become the goofy gunslinging duo standing in the way of a craven landowner's plan to run out Mormon settlers.
01:13:14
Speaker
Hell yes, bro.
01:13:15
Speaker
You cannot anticipate any direction that that sentence goes.
01:13:19
Speaker
No.
Celebrity Humor and Fictional Movie Ideas
01:13:20
Speaker
That is so many turns.
01:13:22
Speaker
It's like a fucking third lap of a Mario Kart course.
01:13:24
Speaker
My only regret about this movie is that I wish that there was someone in the cast that's like so insane.
01:13:30
Speaker
They're like, what the fuck?
01:13:32
Speaker
But I don't know Terrence Hill, Bud Spencer, or Stefan Zacharias.
01:13:36
Speaker
I know Farley Granger.
01:13:38
Speaker
I think Farley Granger is one of the young guys in Rope, right?
01:13:41
Speaker
Oh, sure.
01:13:41
Speaker
I don't know.
01:13:42
Speaker
In Hitchcock's Rope.
01:13:43
Speaker
Did you guys see the tweet that was like, I need Mac and Dennis from It's Always Sunny to recreate the Rope movie shot to shot.
01:13:50
Speaker
That would be fucking sick.
01:13:52
Speaker
Well, Glenn Howerton could actually act the shit out of that kind of concept.
01:13:56
Speaker
Yeah, I don't know how much acting Charles McElhaney has.
01:14:00
Speaker
Charlie Day could.
01:14:03
Speaker
But McElhaney could just put him in a fucking chokehold and kill their ass.
01:14:08
Speaker
Did y'all see McElhaney kind of getting checked by Charlie Day and Glenn Howerton at some live podcast the other day?
01:14:16
Speaker
Oh, what happened?
01:14:18
Speaker
I saw this clip, and McElhaney starts chastising them, saying, like, y'all didn't get me anything for my birthday.
01:14:25
Speaker
Ryan Reynolds got me a $150,000 present.
01:14:29
Speaker
And then Charlie and Glenn immediately like look at each other and they're like, motherfucker, we made you.
01:14:35
Speaker
Yeah.
01:14:37
Speaker
Happy birthday.
01:14:38
Speaker
Yeah.
01:14:39
Speaker
It's a good call.
01:14:40
Speaker
It's like we are all in this together.
01:14:42
Speaker
You would not be friends with Ryan Reynolds.
01:14:45
Speaker
It's like a weirdo anti-vaxxer, but it's like, ah, whatever.
01:14:49
Speaker
Also, Martha Stewart checking Ryan Reynolds is.
01:14:52
Speaker
That was iconic shit.
01:14:54
Speaker
That was fucking awesome.
01:14:55
Speaker
Just her saying, yeah, he's a good actor, but he's not very funny.
01:15:00
Speaker
And then him responding, trying to be funny, also just falling.
01:15:03
Speaker
Oh my God.
01:15:03
Speaker
Ryan Reynolds fucking.
01:15:05
Speaker
You just got to hold your tongue in that moment.
01:15:07
Speaker
Like you just got to be like, take the hit.
01:15:09
Speaker
Charlie Day.
01:15:10
Speaker
I, his movie that he directed was not very good.
01:15:12
Speaker
It was a Charlie Chaplin one, right?
01:15:15
Speaker
Yeah.
01:15:15
Speaker
But, but I will say that I love him in Pacific Rim.
01:15:20
Speaker
Oh, he's very fun in Pacific Rim.
01:15:22
Speaker
Oh, they're all tattoos and shit, yeah.
01:15:24
Speaker
I have a Pacific Rim story that I will not be sharing on the podcast.
01:15:28
Speaker
I always think that Glenn Howerton in the fucking Blackberry movie is like... It's phenomenal shit.
01:15:34
Speaker
He's so good.
01:15:35
Speaker
Everybody in that movie is working.
01:15:38
Speaker
He genuinely should have gotten a best supporting nod.
01:15:40
Speaker
Oh, without a doubt, he should have gotten... I'm from Waterloo!
01:15:44
Speaker
We're the vampires in the hangout!
01:15:48
Speaker
That movie rocks.
01:15:49
Speaker
Yes, it does.
01:15:50
Speaker
I need to dig into the Matt Johnson.
01:15:56
Speaker
Yeah, that and he has one about school shooters that apparently is very funny.
01:16:01
Speaker
Yeah, I've heard that that's really good.
01:16:04
Speaker
Yeah, The Dirties.
01:16:04
Speaker
That was his first movie, I think.
01:16:07
Speaker
I have a question.
01:16:08
Speaker
When's the last time any of you boys watched The Mask?
01:16:14
Speaker
Had to have been like 15 years Yeah 13 to 15 years ago If I may say so It holds up way better than I expected Damn that's good to know Chuck Russell's a fucking G dog
01:16:27
Speaker
Chuck Russell fucking rules.
01:16:28
Speaker
Shout out to the blob too.
01:16:30
Speaker
But there's like a dance number in this movie that's like, oh, this is like high level, really good shit.
01:16:38
Speaker
Yeah.
01:16:39
Speaker
I loved like, even when I was a kid, I feel like it was one of those first movies where I was like, oh shit, like movies can look like this.
01:16:45
Speaker
Well, I remember like it was a huge, like, I feel like it was like a, as a kid, I like, I got it swirled up in my mind with master of disguise, which I don't think is a very good movie.
01:16:56
Speaker
I have a special place in my heart for that very terrible movie.
01:16:59
Speaker
It's because you love 9-11.
01:17:01
Speaker
Yeah.
01:17:02
Speaker
I'm a big 9-11 fan, and I'm also a big... Well, really what I am is I'm a very strangely huge Dana Carvey fan.
01:17:12
Speaker
I just have to say, we have said both things on this podcast.
01:17:16
Speaker
I'm a big 9-11 fan, and I really like George Bush.
01:17:18
Speaker
Both of those things have been said on this episode.
01:17:20
Speaker
We need to chill the fuck out.
01:17:21
Speaker
He did that shit, bro.
01:17:23
Speaker
Yeah, I know.
01:17:23
Speaker
So that's why you're a fan.
01:17:24
Speaker
You're like, Dan, good work, King.
01:17:26
Speaker
I know.
01:17:27
Speaker
I don't care about glycerine, but I love glycerine.
01:17:29
Speaker
Me in the voting booth diving into the bush.
01:17:32
Speaker
Ha ha!
01:17:36
Speaker
Speaking of 9-11, I also watched Point of Hista Social Club for the first time.
01:17:41
Speaker
Oh, that's a good movie.
01:17:43
Speaker
But there's a moment where they're standing on top of the Empire State Building and they're like, no, that can't be the Statue of Liberty.
01:17:50
Speaker
Those two towers right there are so much bigger.
01:17:52
Speaker
Sorry, I just had a thought that I have to get out, which is she dick on my Chaney till my Bush George.
01:18:05
Speaker
Should it be Bush George's?
01:18:08
Speaker
No.
01:18:08
Speaker
Hey, I'm trying to look at Barbara Bush.
01:18:11
Speaker
Hey, I'm trying to George my Bush.
01:18:12
Speaker
Yo, I saw Barbara and HW in real life one time.
01:18:16
Speaker
Wow.
01:18:18
Speaker
We were like, I was at an Astros game and the company my daddy used to work for had seats like just...
01:18:23
Speaker
okay um thank you um my my dad's coming to these store for head seats like just above the diamond boxes like the main seats behind home plate and they literally like walked out of the tunnel right below us um george hw and barbara bush and then consequently a few years later they walked back down that tunnel straight to hell uh nice welcome do you think that
01:18:48
Speaker
Like over under on George W. thinking Will Ferrell's impression of him is the funniest thing he's ever seen in his entire life.
01:18:55
Speaker
Oh, 100%.
01:18:55
Speaker
I think he loves it.
01:18:57
Speaker
Okay.
01:18:57
Speaker
Here's the thing.
01:18:58
Speaker
I hold the belief that Dick Cheney is responsible for like 90% of the awful things George Bush did.
01:19:04
Speaker
For sure.
01:19:05
Speaker
And I think that George Bush, like Donald Trump, should have never been president because they're both such hilarious concepts of people.
01:19:12
Speaker
Yeah.
01:19:13
Speaker
However, if they weren't president, we wouldn't have gotten the funniest things that anyone's ever said on a podium.
01:19:20
Speaker
So just so many of those like now watch this drive is classic.
01:19:24
Speaker
How many is a Brazilian?
01:19:27
Speaker
We would also never have gotten the guy throwing his shoe at him, which is the funniest thing that ever happened in culture.
01:19:35
Speaker
And then without Trump, we would have never had Rosie O'Donnell is a fat pig live on stage on TV.
01:19:41
Speaker
That's insane.
01:19:42
Speaker
That's just an insane thing to drop live.
01:19:47
Speaker
I mean, just countless things that I cherish that exist, but also, man, it's scary that that guy ran and won the presidency.
01:19:56
Speaker
Yeah.
01:19:57
Speaker
And might win again.
01:19:59
Speaker
I mean...
01:20:00
Speaker
We'll see.
01:20:01
Speaker
Oh, gosh.
01:20:02
Speaker
We're two days out.
01:20:03
Speaker
I'm so stressed.
01:20:04
Speaker
Wait, does this episode come out after the... No, it comes out tomorrow, right before the election.
01:20:08
Speaker
It comes out right before the election.
01:20:08
Speaker
Well, it depends on how quick you edit it, Joe.
01:20:11
Speaker
Yeah, Joe, you could hold it.
01:20:13
Speaker
You could hold it and then add in something later.
01:20:15
Speaker
Let's call it.
01:20:17
Speaker
Who's going to win?
01:20:19
Speaker
I don't want to do that.
01:20:20
Speaker
Gil Stein.
01:20:21
Speaker
I'm just going to be so sad if I'm wrong.
01:20:23
Speaker
Left field, Bart Simpson wins with 37 trillion right in votes.
01:20:28
Speaker
I do think Kamala's going to win, but I think either situation is going to have some bad results.
01:20:34
Speaker
Well, y'all remember in 2016 when like 12,000 people rode in Harambe?
01:20:37
Speaker
Yeah.
01:20:38
Speaker
Yeah.
01:20:39
Speaker
It was insane.
01:20:41
Speaker
What if Jeb wins?
01:20:43
Speaker
Yeah, Sleeper.
01:20:44
Speaker
Shut up to Jeb.
01:20:45
Speaker
Jeb rises from the ashes.
01:20:48
Speaker
They're announcing the winner, and he comes up behind the Fox News reporters that are like, and it's looking like we're going to call it for Kamala.
01:20:56
Speaker
And then there's a single spotlight.
01:20:58
Speaker
No, he fucking John Wick, like with a pencil, stabs both of them in the neck, like takes the mic and goes, actually, Jeb wins.
01:21:05
Speaker
And he goes on like a John Wick style.
01:21:08
Speaker
I'm kind of sad that we never got a John Lithgow, Jeb Bush impression.
01:21:12
Speaker
Oh, that would have been good.
01:21:13
Speaker
Yeah.
01:21:13
Speaker
Yeah, he would have been sorry.
01:21:14
Speaker
I wasn't done pitching my movie.
01:21:16
Speaker
So Jeb Bush, then he goes on a John Wick 2 style beatdown where it's like every single politician is trying to kill him.
01:21:23
Speaker
But he's like he's like throwing shit at them, killing them with guns and pistols and like rocket launchers.
01:21:30
Speaker
And then he he goes into the Continental and he kills Donald Trump.
01:21:35
Speaker
And then but then he has to go again on the run because you can't kill someone else.
01:21:40
Speaker
What if his only weapon Is actually just clapping Across somebody's head saying like I did it because you wouldn't Yeah dude That would be good Can Lawrence Fishburne be there?
01:21:51
Speaker
This movie exists in our minds Anybody we want can be in there Mel Gibson's in there Always the first name It's directed by S. Craig Zoller Produced by R.K.
01:22:06
Speaker
What's the white guy in Southland Tales?
01:22:09
Speaker
Justin Timberlake.
01:22:11
Speaker
The other guy.
01:22:13
Speaker
Justin Timberlake.
01:22:14
Speaker
That's who you're thinking of.
01:22:16
Speaker
Sean William Scott.
01:22:18
Speaker
So Jeb actually kills Jim Caviezel by farting so much in his mouth that it gives him sepsis.
01:22:27
Speaker
We watched a 40-minute montage of him just slowly deteriorating just in the middle of the movie.
01:22:36
Speaker
Like he's in a hospital and they're like, I don't think we're going to be able to save him.
01:22:39
Speaker
And then John Gibson's playing himself like holding his hand.
01:22:42
Speaker
What do you think about my boner?
01:22:43
Speaker
Yeah.
01:22:45
Speaker
John Boyce shoots him with little human arrows.
01:22:47
Speaker
I'm telling you, if I make a career, like if I become a director that has the clout that Francis Ford Coppola has, like I don't think that'll ever happen.
01:22:55
Speaker
And that's just me.
01:22:55
Speaker
That's not me being modest.
01:22:56
Speaker
Like that's just, you don't get that.
01:22:58
Speaker
That's like a once in a lifetime thing.
01:23:01
Speaker
But if I got that clout, my version of Megalopolis is my movie where Mark Wahlberg stops 9-11 from happening in a gonzo action thriller where he stops the first plane by fighting his way through all the terrorists.
01:23:19
Speaker
And then he skydives out of the plane and lands on the second plane.
01:23:25
Speaker
and then kills that one and then he uses that plane to fly into the third plane and crash it into the third plane but he like ghost rides the whip and jumps out right before and so this is sounding like it belongs in like the Sharknado franchise
01:23:40
Speaker
What happened to the plane that goes down to Pennsylvania?
01:23:43
Speaker
Yeah, exactly.
01:23:44
Speaker
How does he get to that one?
01:23:45
Speaker
He's not a fucking Superman.
01:23:47
Speaker
He can't save a hundred.
01:23:51
Speaker
And the whole time he's going, hey, hey, what are you doing?
01:23:54
Speaker
Huh?
01:23:55
Speaker
And there's a constant loop of just the part of that Creed song.
01:24:00
Speaker
It's like, hold me now.
01:24:02
Speaker
Like it's like the fucking needle drop from Top Gun where they just play take my breath away like 45,000 times.
01:24:09
Speaker
It's incredible.
01:24:10
Speaker
It's so good.
01:24:11
Speaker
That little sting.
01:24:11
Speaker
It's just that part of Creed.
01:24:12
Speaker
Yeah.
01:24:13
Speaker
Have you all seen the trailer for the Dietrich Bonhoeffer movie?
01:24:16
Speaker
It looks so fucking stupid.
01:24:17
Speaker
Yeah, I have mixed feelings.
01:24:18
Speaker
The fucking Sound of Silence cover.
01:24:20
Speaker
It's a terrible trailer.
01:24:21
Speaker
Dude, the Sound of Silence.
01:24:22
Speaker
I was cackling seeing this before God played.
01:24:25
Speaker
It's a very bad trailer.
01:24:26
Speaker
It is awful.
01:24:27
Speaker
I mean, I like the idea of it, and Dietrich Bonhoeffer is a person who could have an interesting movie made about him.
01:24:32
Speaker
But it looks like it was made by a toddler.
01:24:35
Speaker
Yeah, it just doesn't look good.
01:24:36
Speaker
I'm interested enough because the trailer is just so bad.
01:24:41
Speaker
I will say, my critique of the trailer is the exact same critique I had about Reagan and also Mean Girls the musical, the movie, which is everybody behind the camera doesn't know what a movie is.
01:24:52
Speaker
Yeah.
01:24:53
Speaker
Ronald Reagan is a mean girl.
01:24:56
Speaker
He was a mean girl.
01:24:59
Speaker
Speaking of mean girls, my high of the week is 100% Conclave.
01:25:04
Speaker
I'm just going to throw it out there.
01:25:06
Speaker
Hell yeah.
01:25:08
Speaker
Those are some mean girlies.
01:25:10
Speaker
That's the most mean girl movie.
01:25:12
Speaker
There's a scene in...
Weekly Highlights and Humorous Reviews
01:25:14
Speaker
Basically, the thing that got me to want to see the movie was someone tweeted Regina George throwing the burn book pages down the hallways and said this this scene basically happens in Conclave.
01:25:25
Speaker
And I was legitimately does.
01:25:26
Speaker
I was like, what the fuck are you for real?
01:25:30
Speaker
And they were right.
01:25:31
Speaker
It's the cattiest movie in years, like maybe since Tom Hooper's Cats.
01:25:36
Speaker
It's the cattyest movie.
01:25:38
Speaker
Like, what if, Hey, hold on, hold on.
01:25:39
Speaker
What if it was Toby Hooper's cats?
01:25:41
Speaker
Oh, that would have been so much better.
01:25:43
Speaker
My God.
01:25:44
Speaker
I want to see.
01:25:44
Speaker
That's a movie.
01:25:46
Speaker
Do we want to do Heisenlows?
01:25:47
Speaker
What is he doing?
01:25:48
Speaker
I was going to say, let's do Heisenlows.
01:25:49
Speaker
Joe, what's your low?
01:25:50
Speaker
I'm legitimately about to piss my pants.
01:25:52
Speaker
Oh yeah.
01:25:52
Speaker
Do your low.
01:25:53
Speaker
Unfortunately, my low again is a movie that I actually ended up liking, but I just like not that much.
01:26:01
Speaker
Um, um,
01:26:02
Speaker
I did not really like The Devil's Rejects.
01:26:05
Speaker
I watched it because I really like A House of a Thousand Corpses because it's just so like, it's like exactly what you would think of if you think, what if Rob Zombie directed Texas Chainsaw Massacre?
01:26:15
Speaker
I was going to honorable mention the Rob Zombie Halloween movies because they are so visceral and real.
01:26:21
Speaker
Here's the thing.
01:26:23
Speaker
I like The Devil's Rejects stylistically.
01:26:26
Speaker
It just features a very graphic sexual assault scene that is not played in a way that is enough of a denouncement of it that I couldn't get it.
01:26:37
Speaker
It was like, I feel like Rob Zombie is asking me to laugh at this.
01:26:43
Speaker
And I don't think I can.
01:26:44
Speaker
It's just not funny.
01:26:46
Speaker
It's really gross.
01:26:48
Speaker
But stylistically, this movie has some of the best needle drops I've ever heard in my life.
01:26:52
Speaker
You do be having good needle drops.
01:26:55
Speaker
So I'll say tentatively, I think The Devil's Reject is a good movie.
01:26:59
Speaker
It just has some very dated dark humor.
01:27:04
Speaker
I had a similar thought in one of the moments in his first Halloween remake but then he like kind of vindicates it by hyper violence but yeah I have not seen The Devil's Rejects yeah that's my low I mean again I like the movie still honorable mention high is Death Spa guys I'm not kidding this movie was fucking great like some of the kills in this movie I was gasping
01:27:34
Speaker
I was like, oh my god.
01:27:38
Speaker
It just like, it has a twist that you can probably see coming, but I didn't because I was just so engrossed in it.
01:27:46
Speaker
it's got performances that are pretty like surprisingly good.
01:27:50
Speaker
And I will say what you heard me say was that the acting is good.
01:27:54
Speaker
And that is not what I meant.
01:27:56
Speaker
Yeah.
01:27:56
Speaker
The acting is not good.
01:27:58
Speaker
It's surprisingly good.
01:27:59
Speaker
Okay.
01:28:00
Speaker
The music is perfect.
01:28:02
Speaker
It is everyone in this movie is hot as shit.
01:28:06
Speaker
Hell yeah.
01:28:07
Speaker
There is, it is one of the horniest horror movies I've ever seen in my entire life.
01:28:13
Speaker
Sold.
01:28:13
Speaker
Incredible.
01:28:14
Speaker
And it's so bloody.
01:28:15
Speaker
There is a kill in the end of this movie that is like evil dead levels of bloody.
01:28:21
Speaker
Sick.
01:28:22
Speaker
Awesome.
01:28:23
Speaker
It's no longer sold.
01:28:24
Speaker
I'm out.
01:28:26
Speaker
It does.
01:28:27
Speaker
It there's a kill with a piece of gym equipment that was so funny.
01:28:32
Speaker
Oh, yeah.
01:28:32
Speaker
And it's about a it's about a haunted health spa.
01:28:36
Speaker
And I will just say, this is my pitch for the movie, and this is what made me go, I'm locked the fuck in.
01:28:41
Speaker
It has the best title card I've ever seen in my entire life.
01:28:44
Speaker
Oh.
01:28:45
Speaker
The best what?
01:28:46
Speaker
Title card.
01:28:48
Speaker
It's a slow push-in on the name of the health spa, which is like Star Body Health Spa, I think.
01:28:58
Speaker
And it's completely dark.
01:29:00
Speaker
Just the name Starbody Health Spa is bright neon.
01:29:05
Speaker
Slow push in.
01:29:06
Speaker
It's raining, thundering.
01:29:07
Speaker
Lightning strikes Starbody Health Spa.
01:29:12
Speaker
All of the letters go out except for Death Spa.
01:29:16
Speaker
Sick.
01:29:17
Speaker
And it's completely like diegetic.
01:29:18
Speaker
It's a title card that's like on screen.
01:29:21
Speaker
It's not in words.
01:29:22
Speaker
It's like, I don't know, man.
01:29:23
Speaker
I just saw that and I was like, people are cooking with fucking rocket fuel.
01:29:28
Speaker
Can I ask a question?
01:29:30
Speaker
Please.
01:29:31
Speaker
I know this movie came out in 1988, so this doesn't make sense, but follow the joke.
01:29:36
Speaker
The scene where somebody dies by a piece of exercise equipment, was it soundtrack to Phoebe Bridger's garden song?
01:29:42
Speaker
Should have been.
01:29:43
Speaker
Should have been.
01:29:44
Speaker
Could have been.
01:29:46
Speaker
Maybe I'll make an edit.
01:29:46
Speaker
There you go.
01:29:47
Speaker
Joe, who do you want to hear from?
01:29:50
Speaker
I want to hear from... I think I want to hear from Red.
01:29:54
Speaker
Beautiful.
01:29:55
Speaker
The sleepiest boy.
01:29:57
Speaker
Better wake up so you can go see Conclave.
01:30:00
Speaker
I know.
01:30:02
Speaker
You look so cozy in bed.
01:30:03
Speaker
It's worrying me.
01:30:04
Speaker
No, I'll be fine.
01:30:05
Speaker
I'll be honest.
01:30:06
Speaker
My low...
01:30:15
Speaker
My low might be just the emotional roller coaster that was Baylor TCU.
01:30:24
Speaker
Oh, fair.
01:30:25
Speaker
It was heavy.
01:30:26
Speaker
It was extremely upsetting being at the pub, being really frustrated, and literally admitting to people, I've never lived in Waco to experience Baylor beating TCU, either at home or in Fort Worth.
01:30:41
Speaker
So that was pretty fucking cool.
01:30:43
Speaker
Hell yeah.
01:30:45
Speaker
I think all the football that I watched, because it all went my way, the dogs got to win, bears got to win, the Falcons beat the Cowboys today.
01:30:58
Speaker
But I think my actual high is that on Halloween night, I rewatched The Shining, which I just like...
01:31:08
Speaker
I was with a group of people and we were all trying to decide and it was like the easiest possible, like for the people who hadn't seen it, it was the easiest possible sell for the people who had seen it.
01:31:20
Speaker
I don't know anybody who like has seen this movie and isn't like, holy shit, what a fucking masterpiece.
01:31:26
Speaker
So anytime I get to rewatch The Shining and just take it all in, I will also say this time the things that really stood out is
01:31:39
Speaker
I know in the particular circles of film Twitter that we run in, people talk about like Wendy Carlos a lot and about her work and about like the representation of like a trans musician.
01:31:52
Speaker
you know like scoring such an incredible film but that score really is something special dude it's a heater man yeah it's a heater top to bottom yeah and the first opening synth lines of the shining soundtrack is like just instantly tells you exactly what you're in for um and like even it's such an interesting thing
01:32:16
Speaker
because The Shining feels kind of out of time, but it came out in 1980.
01:32:22
Speaker
And so that synth score is fitting, but it also feels before its time because it's not quite like Miami Vice levels of synth.
01:32:34
Speaker
So it's really interesting.
01:32:37
Speaker
And I will say Scatman Crothers is Dick Halloran.
01:32:41
Speaker
I think it's a really, really excellent performance.
01:32:43
Speaker
He's incredible.
01:32:45
Speaker
So, yeah.
01:32:46
Speaker
I want to hear from Austin.
01:32:48
Speaker
Great.
01:32:50
Speaker
We've talked about Conclave.
01:32:51
Speaker
That would definitely be honorable mention high for me.
01:32:54
Speaker
My low is... This is just Zach Bate, but whatever.
01:33:01
Speaker
My low is Aston Villa, my soccer club's performance this morning against Tottenham Hotspur.
01:33:07
Speaker
Losing 4-1.
01:33:09
Speaker
Just really disappointing.
01:33:10
Speaker
You're talking to more than one Tottenham fan here.
01:33:12
Speaker
That's true.
01:33:13
Speaker
Losing by three points in soccer is embarrassing.
01:33:15
Speaker
Shut the
01:33:15
Speaker
the fuck up joe good lord especially if they're leading at the half yeah we're we're up one nil at the half just don't talk to me about i'm really upset um it's very very upsetting i really want to make fun of you for saying nil but i'm not going to thank you
01:33:31
Speaker
I respect you too.
01:33:32
Speaker
Thank you.
01:33:34
Speaker
My High is actually a movie I watched on Tubi.
01:33:40
Speaker
Tubi.
01:33:40
Speaker
Tubi.
01:33:41
Speaker
I referenced it, I think, when Andy was on because it stars a guy that Andy knows.
01:33:48
Speaker
It's a movie called Blackout.
01:33:50
Speaker
directed by Larry Fessenden, his most recent horror movie.
01:33:55
Speaker
Very sort of like low budget, small movie about a wolfman.
01:34:01
Speaker
Starring Alex Hurt, who's William Hurt's son.
01:34:06
Speaker
Other actors, known actors featured in this movie, Kevin Corrigan.
01:34:11
Speaker
Oh, great.
01:34:12
Speaker
I love Mr. Corrigan.
01:34:13
Speaker
James LeGrow, who's in a lot of the Kelly Reichert movies.
01:34:19
Speaker
Joe Swanberg gives a one-scene turn in this movie.
01:34:22
Speaker
The pioneer of mumblecore.
01:34:24
Speaker
Exactly.
01:34:25
Speaker
Addison Timlin, or as she's known on the internet, Jeremy Allen White's ex-wife.
01:34:30
Speaker
Cooper Rafe's current fling.
01:34:32
Speaker
Cooper Rafe's current fling, allegedly.
01:34:36
Speaker
I bet Cooper Rafe is supposed to be like a motherfucker.
01:34:39
Speaker
Oh, I'm sure he does.
01:34:41
Speaker
I bet he doesn't care if he comes.
01:34:43
Speaker
I feel like once... He wants to gnaw on some bush.
01:34:46
Speaker
Yeah, once his partner climaxes, he's like, we can be done.
01:34:51
Speaker
I don't need to have a turn.
01:34:52
Speaker
It's all good.
01:34:52
Speaker
It's all good, babe.
01:34:53
Speaker
I'm fine.
01:34:54
Speaker
I have to call my mom.
01:34:55
Speaker
Yeah, exactly.
01:34:56
Speaker
And then he just hunches over and beats off in the shower like that.
01:34:59
Speaker
Like Connor O'Malley in the fucking rap world.
01:35:02
Speaker
But, so this movie, it's, again, it's like very low budget, mostly practical effects, just makeup for the Wolfman stuff.
01:35:13
Speaker
Because of the budget, you kind of take certain constraints of like the transformations aren't like amazing visually, but it's kind of this idea of like, it's really playing is like, okay, every time this guy turns into a wolf or a wolfman, he blacks out and he's also a recovering alcoholic.
01:35:31
Speaker
So like, are those what are those blackouts are like, is the wolfman just a manifestation of his alcoholism coming out and his rage and his anger?
01:35:40
Speaker
And he's like an artist.
01:35:41
Speaker
He's like a very subdued person.
01:35:43
Speaker
But the movie starts after the inciting event has happened.
01:35:47
Speaker
So the movie, it starts after he's been bitten.
01:35:49
Speaker
You kind of see it later on.
01:35:51
Speaker
But like he's already struggling and becoming the wolfman.
01:35:55
Speaker
Him and his girlfriend have broken up because he doesn't know how to handle it.
01:35:58
Speaker
And he wants to kill himself.
01:36:00
Speaker
Like he's looking to kill himself, but the stuff keeps happening and ruining it.
01:36:04
Speaker
Oh, cool.
01:36:05
Speaker
That sounds really.
01:36:06
Speaker
Yeah.
01:36:07
Speaker
It's, it's really well written.
01:36:08
Speaker
It's really well acted.
01:36:10
Speaker
Alex Hurt is phenomenal in this movie.
01:36:13
Speaker
He's a deserving Nebo baby.
01:36:14
Speaker
I think so.
01:36:15
Speaker
I think he's quite good.
01:36:17
Speaker
And Andy talked when he was on about how he was like in his favorite New York theater production he'd ever seen or something.
01:36:21
Speaker
Yeah.
01:36:22
Speaker
Yeah.
01:36:23
Speaker
You remember that?
01:36:24
Speaker
So
Music in Film: John Williams and Anthology Films
01:36:25
Speaker
I, I thought it was really excellent.
01:36:26
Speaker
I, I,
01:36:27
Speaker
Again, I think it's notable to me to just be like, don't expect crazy effects or anything from this movie, but a really good script, really well acted.
01:36:36
Speaker
Yeah, Blackout.
01:36:39
Speaker
It just came out earlier this year.
01:36:41
Speaker
It's already on Tubi.
01:36:43
Speaker
Highly, highly recommend.
01:36:46
Speaker
Z-Rob?
01:36:48
Speaker
I was trying to think about my low and like, I don't think I have a true low.
01:36:53
Speaker
I think we briefly mentioned Maxine last podcast and I hadn't finished it yet.
01:36:58
Speaker
And now I have and it didn't get any better.
01:37:01
Speaker
So that shit sucks.
01:37:02
Speaker
So does most of like the real life discourse at the moment.
01:37:06
Speaker
It's probably my real, my real low is like jammed.
01:37:10
Speaker
Things actually are very bleak.
01:37:13
Speaker
That being said, a honorable mention for this week.
01:37:17
Speaker
I'm not going to mention Concliffe because we are...
01:37:20
Speaker
are in accordance with rules.
01:37:21
Speaker
But there is a brand new, very much Steven Spielberg-driven documentary about John Williams that just dropped on Disney+.
01:37:31
Speaker
And I watched it the other morning because my neighbor was getting railed at 4 a.m.
01:37:37
Speaker
Like a champion?
01:37:39
Speaker
And it woke me up.
01:37:40
Speaker
And so I decided, yeah, I want to watch a John Williams documentary.
01:37:44
Speaker
This shit made me cry three different times.
01:37:47
Speaker
It's very beautiful.
01:37:49
Speaker
I recommend it.
01:37:50
Speaker
It's very well done.
01:37:51
Speaker
Steven Spielberg is just so enthusiastically a fan of John Williams.
01:37:57
Speaker
He's in this documentary so much, but it doesn't feel like the Steven Spielberg show.
01:38:02
Speaker
It feels like I don't have enough good things to say about this extremely accomplished man that I love.
01:38:07
Speaker
It's just called Music by John Williams.
01:38:10
Speaker
Music by John Williams.
01:38:11
Speaker
Directed by Laurent Bozzaro.
01:38:17
Speaker
Nice.
01:38:18
Speaker
Basmati?
01:38:19
Speaker
Yeah.
01:38:19
Speaker
Basmati Rice?
01:38:20
Speaker
Anyway, very, very good.
01:38:22
Speaker
I liked it a lot.
01:38:23
Speaker
John Williams is a gentleman and a scholar.
01:38:28
Speaker
I think 54 Oscar nominations.
01:38:31
Speaker
It's crazy.
01:38:31
Speaker
There's some stuff.
01:38:33
Speaker
that I didn't know he scored that I was like, holy shit.
01:38:37
Speaker
And there's some other stuff that I forgot that he scored that is just like a part of our daily lives.
01:38:42
Speaker
And I was like, God damn, I forgot that.
01:38:44
Speaker
His J-Up's K-score.
01:38:47
Speaker
The fucking Monday Night Football theme, the Olympics.
01:38:50
Speaker
I mean, I will say as much as we don't talk about Star Wars in this podcast, the bit in A New Hope where the music swells when he's looking at the two sons on Tatooine is...
01:39:01
Speaker
It's one of the greatest moments.
01:39:02
Speaker
This documentary talks about how that was originally scored differently.
01:39:06
Speaker
And then someone was like, I think it might've been George Lucas was like, nah, that's not the vibe I'm going for.
01:39:11
Speaker
And he changed it.
01:39:13
Speaker
I'll say it.
01:39:13
Speaker
I think George Lucas is a fucking genius.
01:39:16
Speaker
He is, dude.
01:39:17
Speaker
Absolutely is.
01:39:18
Speaker
I just think that people took his shit away from him.
01:39:20
Speaker
And also he's too genius to be good at directing.
01:39:24
Speaker
There are some people that are too smart.
01:39:25
Speaker
John Williams, he talks about how it's like, this is one of the only dudes besides Steven Spielberg that would listen to something I made that I thought was incredible and be like, nah, try again.
01:39:36
Speaker
Yeah.
01:39:37
Speaker
But my true high of the week is an extremely film broke court, but the movie Qui-Don...
01:39:46
Speaker
was as good as they say it is it's a very patient movie it's a four-part anthology that takes its time but once you get to the end of it you're like that was like i'm first of all like a sucker for anthologies i think they're the they're like a cheat code for like elevating storytelling in its simplest form um but quite on is like
01:40:15
Speaker
It's just masterful.
01:40:17
Speaker
You feel some connections to Greek mythology, some Shakespearean stuff.
01:40:23
Speaker
I'm always a sucker for a representation of the fates.
01:40:26
Speaker
I don't know.
01:40:27
Speaker
It's very slow.
01:40:28
Speaker
You've got to get into the right mindset to watch it, but if you do, it's excellent stuff.
01:40:33
Speaker
I love it.
01:40:34
Speaker
Shout out to Kobayashi.
01:40:37
Speaker
Kobayashi.
01:40:38
Speaker
Thank you.
01:40:39
Speaker
I love hot dogs.
01:40:39
Speaker
Thank you for listening.
01:40:41
Speaker
All right.
01:40:42
Speaker
Love you all.
01:40:43
Speaker
Hot dogs.
01:40:43
Speaker
I'm serious.