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Kraven the Hunter
31 Plays2 months ago
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Transcript
Introduction to 'Reshoot' Podcast
00:00:01
Speaker
After watching Kraven, we will not financially recover from this. Welcome to reshoot, amateurs in no suits. Too many movies to explore.
00:00:13
Speaker
Ruthie, Hector, and Ed left her till the end. Let's see something we've never done before.
00:00:24
Speaker
Welcome to Reshoot, an amateur's guide to gooder films. We take movies that are good, bad, somewhere in between and make them objectively better. Now with 35% tariff. Now with a 35% tariff. Whatever the hell that means. Maybe our episode will be longer.
00:00:39
Speaker
Probably not. Hopefully not for the editor's sake. Not it. Not it. Shit.
Meet the Hosts: Steve, Ruthie, and Hector
00:00:50
Speaker
ah Hello, I am your host, Steve Irwin.
00:00:57
Speaker
um I'm Ruthie.
00:01:00
Speaker
I am that silent scream Rhino does in the film.
00:01:07
Speaker
<unk>m hector I'm Hector.
00:01:12
Speaker
Tiger King. and Yes.
00:01:19
Speaker
Arrow baskets.
00:01:22
Speaker
Fucking Carole Baskins fed husband to the Tigers. I called for help twice and nobody picked
Discussing 'Kraven the Hunter' and Its Cultural Themes
00:01:28
Speaker
up. yes
00:01:34
Speaker
Anyways, guys, we watched Kraven the Hunter. yeah we We finished off the Mobius verse, finally. and dear God, how it just got worse. I like how we just don't count Venom.
00:01:45
Speaker
Have you guys seen all three Venoms? We don't count those. don't think Sony even counts those. I watched all three. They're good, right? Those are the three good ones. The first one's fine. Second one needed to be R. Third one's stupid.
00:01:59
Speaker
Third one is referred really stupid. They had a new villain. They included a new villain to the Venom. right it was Was it a no comic or was it a movie original? Or was it very, very early in the comics? It's new in the comics.
00:02:14
Speaker
It was like three to four years old. So it's still fresh. And then... No, yeah. And I'm like, damn. Wow, they're... Why? Bottom of the barrel, baby. He's not even a main villain. He just shows up for like three scenes last I heard. It was supposed to be like a Thanos situation. yeah. He...
00:02:30
Speaker
oh yeah he Yeah, you see him at the beginning and it's fucking the same ah
00:02:40
Speaker
Andy Serkis, I think? Is it spoiling a movie, a recent came out movie, if you're kind of just using this as like a warning of, hey, this movie sucks?
00:02:51
Speaker
I mean, Noel was in the trailer, so it's not spoiler. Noel was in the trailer, yeah, but the actor, it's the guy that does Caesar in King of the Planet of the Apes. It's Andy Serkis. Yeah, go on. King of the Planet of the Apes. King of the Planet of the Apes.
00:03:04
Speaker
King of the Hill of the Apes. Nailed it. That boy ain't right. and That chimp ain't right. so but So are you Chinese or Japanese?
00:03:17
Speaker
What? I'm from Laos. I'm Laotian. yeah Yep, he's Laotian. Yeah, he's like, I'll be the judge of that. Looks him up now.
00:03:30
Speaker
You're Laotian, aren't you? it is That's advanced racism. That's right. new Dude, yeah. The racism where where they have to be correct.
00:03:41
Speaker
Yeah, you need to be, you need to identify the correct group to get the, to unlock the special slurs. guys need to watch Community. Pierce, Pierce's dad, the old man Pierce, his dad is racist against other white people because they're not, they're not the right kind of white. Oh, so like 20th century racist.
00:03:59
Speaker
No. Like early 20th. Advanced. So 18th, 19th century racist? 19th century. Yes. Yeah. 19th century. He doesn't wear A's. Yeah, if you were too tan, you were dumb. Yeah, if you were Italian, you weren't white enough. No, he's made... Oh, yeah, that's right. he he said They did that for whites and Irish Italians. But that that's 20th century racism. Yeah. mind your britta was what was like part irish like way back and he's like oh and he made fun of not irish it was uh swedish even the swedes weren't saved with this dude it was hilarious oh that's 17th century yeah it was insane it was insane anyway speaking of racism this movie is racist against me i don't know what this means i just want to get on talking about the movie
00:04:45
Speaker
Great segue. Great segue. Perfectly tangential. feel like this movie was a hate crime. That's it. God damn it. could you could You could argue that this race this movie was racist against the the like female lead.
00:04:57
Speaker
Calypso, yeah. she She's black and she has voodoo shit, so. I mean. Isn't that like, you know. I mean. It can. This movie didn't do good. that i play it like like but she is She is actually from Africa, though.
00:05:14
Speaker
well her Her grandma lived in Africa. We know for sure her grandma's African. We know she lives in the UK. She has an American accent. ah I would argue she does not pass the lampshade pet test after she is a grown-ass woman, because the only time she actually comes and comes into play is when she's got the bow and arrow in like the big...
00:05:38
Speaker
pre-final fight bit. Otherwise, having her there as a character, she's useless. I'm sorry, I'm getting ahead of myself. Episode 3 is hard. Also Boomer.
00:05:50
Speaker
I will also say... Okay, never mind. I'm getting ahead of myself also. Episode Cesar, you need to kick us man. I know. I was i was trying to be nice. My therapy skills were kicking I'm like, I'm going listen to what you guys have to say.
00:06:02
Speaker
and not You can't therapize us. wherere youre like She's your wife and I'm your friend. You literally can't do that. Illegal. I'll report you. have my license yet to report it, dumbass.
00:06:13
Speaker
Anyway.
00:06:17
Speaker
The loophole. Or associate even. i'm um I'm not even a marriage family therapy associate. I'm still in school.
00:06:24
Speaker
I got lost. Smart point. I'm not. I'm not. Anyway. I'm so proud of you. don't say it don't ruin my Don't ruin this thing we got going on where y'all trashed me. No. So, ah this movie sucks ass. Just watch a whole just watch a synopsis. or not Don't say just watch a synopsis. Either we just jump into it or we give a synopsis. We're not giving a synopsis. It's the most basic ass movie. You predict everything that's going to happen before it happens.
00:06:51
Speaker
it's It's just messy. It's messy and bad. It's just focused on the fight scenes. That's it. There you have your movie. theres The fight scenes aren't that good too. it yeah It's kind of ass. It's really ass. I didn't think it would make a movie worse than Madame Web, but fuck, man.
00:07:03
Speaker
This is not worse than Madame This is a lot worse than Madame Web. This is not worse than Madame Web. fucking wish his mom was a spider researcher in the Amazon. Lion researcher.
00:07:16
Speaker
A lion researcher in the Amazon. And there's a bunch people. This not worse than Madame Web. There's a bunch of lion people who are just, you know. Not worse than Madame Web. Anyways, episode says odd. So, in this... Oh, God.
00:07:30
Speaker
Ed, go you're going first? Oh, me go first? No, you go first. you You seem like you got a lot to say here. um so first of all this movie is three times yeah this movie is not worse than madam webb yes it is all right i will say i enjoyed it less the more times i watched it why okay i understand watching it twice first time we saw it we saw the free imax second time was for the podcast why did you watch it three so i watched it a second time alone because it was for the podcast and then i watched it again with levi
00:08:04
Speaker
that makes sense And you didn't even bring Levi. You didn't bring Levi like we asked you to. Miscommunication? Shut up. You can take this part out, by the way. yeah you can take that part out. I'm just heckling.
00:08:15
Speaker
I know, but like, miscommunication for the next one. He'll pick. um
00:08:22
Speaker
This movie was fine for the most part. For the most part.
00:08:33
Speaker
Okay. Okay. i don't think but I think Vine's too much of a compliment. Vine is too much of a compliment? don't know. Maybe I just have a soft spot for Craven and Aaron Taylor Johnson. but He hates Aaron Taylor Johnson. I hate them 2024.
00:08:49
Speaker
You know he got groomed, right? Yes. I feel bad for him. I feel bad for him too. Maybe he's into gilts. I don't know. Who knows? allegedly groomed allegedly groomed allegedly groomed allegedly yeah he was i think it was actually i think like nine like 19 when it happened so not i mean we would still call like a 19 year old with like a person in their late 20s or like early th thirty s that's still feels like 40s is definitely and i think they met before he was an adult yeah yeah they they had worked on one thing before but they knew of each other but didn't interact Okay, so it wasn't like a family-friend kind of... Okay.
00:09:32
Speaker
Yeah. Okay. They worked on something before, and then they worked on something later, and then that's when they got involved. I'll be honest, 2024, if Nick Cage had that good year two, three years ago, this was definitely Aaron Taylor-Johnson's worst year. Because I thought he was the worst part of Nosferatu. Yeah.
00:09:49
Speaker
And then I thought if he was fine in Osherah 2. He was acting in a different movie than everyone else. He was he was auditioning for Bridgerton. Let's be real. Oh my god, he was.
00:10:02
Speaker
oh my god, he was. That's my recommendation. Watch Bridgerton. He was fine. I like Aaron. No, don't hate him. I don't hate I like him.
00:10:12
Speaker
I like him. He's a hater. You guys are putting fucking words in my mouth. He's fine, and I liked him in a few other films I've seen him in. most You like him most in Bullet Train. He was really in Bullet Train. He's a fucking diesel.
00:10:24
Speaker
He's a fucking diesel. Fucking diesel.
00:10:29
Speaker
ah So, yeah, like the my number one complaint on this is just like, obviously the CGI was rushed on like literally everything. Yes.
00:10:40
Speaker
Literally everything. Agreed. They did not pay them enough or did not give them enough time. They probably were telling them, oh, but we're going to change this. Well, it's probably both. Let's be real. They reshot the film ah pretty hard. i It's what I heard.
00:10:55
Speaker
Were there heavy reshoots? Really? I heard there were some reshoots. Yeah. i mean rat you re you Reshoots are common. It depends how much of it. Yes. And reshoots aren't necessarily bad. No, it's not. That's literally the name of our podcast. No, I know.
00:11:07
Speaker
but like, ah it worked. I mean, the fucking Daredevil show got reshot. Oh, yeah. that was And that was a lot better once they reshot it. But like, what I mean, though, is like, I i heard it was like the serious kind of like, this isn't working.
00:11:23
Speaker
They knew this was their last chance to make it work. like the Black Adam reshoots. There were Black Adam reshoots? I think so. Wasn't there? No, Captain America 4 reshoots. Where it was reshocked for like two years straight. Oh yeah, that's right. Dude, that movie dropped and then I heard nothing about it.
00:11:41
Speaker
I want to know. All I know of the movie is the shitty, what was it, Allstate ad? Oh right, yeah. i mean it was kind of funny but like they overplayed it have a lot of feelings about ads let's not get into it ed please continue so yeah the cgi was just pretty shoddy all over the place ah aaron taylor johnson's a good actor shut the fuck up on what else uh oh whatever that uh what was what was his name
00:12:13
Speaker
The guy with the hypnosis? The foreigner. The foreigner. That's a cool-ass fucking power. That's not his power in the comics. I know that's not his power in the comics, but it's a cool-ass fucking power, and it was pretty cool how they it. Is it hypnosis or super speed?
00:12:30
Speaker
It's hypnosis. okay it's like it's like It's like the Geass of that little kid in Code Geass season 2. Right. Oh my god, you're right. yeah It is literally that.
00:12:40
Speaker
But for three seconds. Someone's a weeb in that writing room. Weeb, weeb, weeb. Bro, I'm the least... Well, I'm the second most weeb. i Hector, you're the weeb.
00:12:54
Speaker
You told me about Code Geass, right? Yeah, I did. Yeah, I think I did. Yeah, because I just watched it. Yeah. I also told him about Full Monarchimist Brotherhood, so... No, I knew of Brotherhood already. I'm so proud of... Anyway.
00:13:06
Speaker
Anywho, we're weaving out. we're This isn't working out, Ruthie. It's too late. It's too late in the evening. ah i'm sorry. I've had a very long day. too. um foreigners power is pretty cool uh the whole oh my god okay so yeah now to the shit that sucks all right see at least i had good things to say about this movie that's why it's not bad as the cgi i sucked oh and ball makes never mind never mind i'm going okay cgi was bad
00:13:40
Speaker
i like the foreigner and aaron taylor johnson and uh you know i also like the little brother a little bit also so but anyways now to the stuff now now see move the cgi sucked into this section now the things that sucked cgi sucked um how he got his powers is the stupidest thing i've ever seen in my entire fucking life craven doesn't have superpowers
00:14:06
Speaker
Hector, please enlighten enlighten me Obviously I'm wrong. No, okayto no. He has had, depending on the media, he doesn't have powers. Most of the time he doesn't have powers. He's just a really good hunter.
00:14:18
Speaker
But in Spectacular Spider-Man, the best Spider-Man cartoon of all time, one could consider one of the few flaws the show has is that they had him splice himself with a few animal genes to have a bunch of different animal abilities after his first hunt against Spider-Man and it did so terribly.
00:14:35
Speaker
And he permanently looks like a lion slash a few other animals for the rest the show. I hate everything of what you just said. It was a really good show. It was the weirdest I've changed they made.
00:14:47
Speaker
Yeah, well, Kraven doesn't have superpowers and the way he got superpowers is just stupid. And, like, he doesn't... I even looked this up. He doesn't even have, like, an affinity with animals in the comics either.
00:14:59
Speaker
No, he just hunts them. And in this one, he can, like, ah pseudo-communicate or just like aura them to so that they run away. Yeah.
00:15:11
Speaker
Buffley walks into room. That's also all Aaron did in this movie was Buffley doing things. I if had his physique, I'd do that too. Yeah, he kind did like the masculine version of breast boobily.
00:15:24
Speaker
Yeah. Yeah.
00:15:28
Speaker
Just buffly doing stuff. Yeah. I do. Okay. I do. I did also like how he, his little like stealth stuff, how he did stealth.
00:15:43
Speaker
It was pretty interesting and not like, cause he, there was a scene where he was just like walking behind people. Just like, He was camouflaging himself and kind of Catherine Zeta-Jonesing.
00:15:57
Speaker
i know, but he but he was still he was still just like standing straight up. He wasn't crouching or anything like that. Yeah, he was acting like he belonged. He was camouflaging. Yeah. um His... oh Butler?
00:16:12
Speaker
Jared Butler, right? No. Russell Crowe. I get them confused all the time. too! They're very similar. Russell
00:16:22
Speaker
Javert. Javert. Just say Javert. What an accent.
00:16:31
Speaker
Accents. All of them were just kind of... Why doesn't why doesn't Craven have a Russian accent? Right? Yeah.
00:16:42
Speaker
Yeah. i even like Even listening to his American accent, I could hear it slip. Yeah, just give that man another accent, please. just Anything, dear God. He's struggling over here. He's almost as bad as Harry Styles.
00:16:58
Speaker
Oh, God, I forgot. it I blocked out my memory. oh Harry Styles from, ah who what was the Don't Worry Darling. Worry Darling, yeah.
00:17:08
Speaker
God, that movie sucks. ah Yeah, it was, and like, I don't know, like,
00:17:18
Speaker
The rhino was also just such a fucking weirdo. No, no. The rhino actor knew exactly what kind of film he was in. i am fully supportive. He was my favorite character in the entire... The only bearable character in the entire movie. He was like, uh, Jeremy Irons in that D&D movie. The one before... That man was chewing more scenery than he then you get goats in a field, dude. Like, it was so good. like cows.
00:17:42
Speaker
Cows do a lot more chewing. Yeah, cows do a lot more chewing. Yeah, yeah. Like, it was so good. yeah okay sure he might have fit the movie the best but like the thing is that other people were trying to make a not that kind of movie Yeah, and it failed, so I think he was in the right ear.
00:18:04
Speaker
Yeah, but it still felt out of place. You gotta be doing like the majority of what everybody else is doing, at least. So when Nick Cage does it, it's great. When someone else does it, it's literally the harassment versus flirting meme. it Right here. it fits with With Cage, it fits in the types of movies he's doing.
00:18:22
Speaker
and his In his good year, like 2020, what, 3? 2? 2. what three two no two too Okay, so but like the Divergent movies, I think the main character the main actress, she was the only one who was kind of not camping it up. i don't let especiallyly what doesn Did we watch the Divergent movies?
00:18:42
Speaker
No. i saw the second one. Please, I read all three books. The movies are, the movies and the books are in fact. I bought all of them. with Which stupid sci-fi girl main character movie did we watch? I forgot.
00:18:57
Speaker
The host. Oh, yeah. No, it wasn't it wasn't the host. There was another one with Sean. Eddie Redmayne was evil space emperor. Yes! Jupiter's sending was good, though. Jupiter! Yeah, that one. Anyway, keep going. Keep going. We're losing track. Keep it straight. Yeah, this is going a mess. Oh, my God. Have fun! I'm going spend, like, 18 hours editing this.
00:19:19
Speaker
Good luck. um We want done by tomorrow. ah Yeah, the the rhino was... I don't know. I didn't like it. Also, like, ah when he stopped that truck, Kraven was on top of it.
00:19:35
Speaker
He should have gone flying. But he did not move. No, but he picked the animal ability of humpback whale to, like, densify his gravity. At first I heard hump, and I was like, he fucked the car.
00:19:50
Speaker
Yeah, so he he stopped a truck, like a two-ton truck, going like, don't know, some 50-plus miles an hour. Right? right Yeah, yeah.
00:20:01
Speaker
And then he gets pulled away by two water buffaloes.
00:20:06
Speaker
but Which aren't indigenous to the area. Because I looked at Ruthie and I'm like, those water buffo those buffalo are not from here. Those are African water buffalo that they see tonight. Into Siberia! yeah yeah Also, the foreigner getting murked the way he did was...
00:20:25
Speaker
stupid. um I mean, he's ah he's a good at assassinating. He's not good at dodging. I know, but like he wasn't aware that there was somebody else there. Something tells me he only ever worked indoors.
00:20:41
Speaker
He's a pretty boy assassin. He's a pretty boy assassin.
00:20:48
Speaker
Yeah, I don't know. like
00:20:52
Speaker
It was all just mostly mostly bad, but kind of okay at parts. I don't know.
00:21:02
Speaker
a honestly I don't know, like, What I would do. it's a It's a complete rewrite and I really couldn't think of anything. Dude, our podcast is literally fixing movies and you can't... I know. bringing nothing?
00:21:17
Speaker
I mean, bringing sometimes some movies are just hard. not even Not even just Aaron Taylor Johnson has a Russian accent? That wouldn't have made the movie better.
00:21:27
Speaker
and would have made it a little better. He had a good Russian accent, and I hate to admit it Wait, he did have a good Russian accent? He did it few times, yeah. oh
00:21:40
Speaker
Honestly, what they could have done with this movie is just, like, tie it into the ah No Way Home, and he just gets isekied.
00:21:54
Speaker
Into... He's trying to figure out which Spider-Man to hunt. Yeah, different... He just gets, like, isekied into a Spider-Man universe. and he Doesn't even have to be... yeah Doesn't even have to be... it doesn't even have to You don't even have to show Spider-Man. Kraven was in No Way Home.
00:22:11
Speaker
Oh, he was? Yes, he was. He was in the sky. Yes. There was a silhouette in the sky. Of Kraven. And we almost got Kraven as the main villain for No Way Home. Is what Tom Holland revealed.
00:22:24
Speaker
Almost. I'm surprised they told him that. They don't tell him shit anymore. No, they did they do. That was the whole thing was for Felicity. Wait, him him accidentally spoiling was an act?
00:22:36
Speaker
I think it was a bit. The first two or one or two times, yes. Afterwards, the whole they're keeping me secret, they don't tell me shit was just a bit. Oh, that okay. After the first two times, it was after that was just a bit.
00:22:47
Speaker
So him saying they don't tell me shit, that's the bit. Yes. Okay. Not that him accidentally spoiling shit. already admitted that he's read a couple scripts for the next Spider-Man film. and He says he's heading the right direction.
00:23:00
Speaker
i think let's hope Let's hope Sony doesn't fuck this up. hope Sony lets him use Kingpin. yeah oh No, no, no, no, no no no ah so but but What they did do with Kingpin and fucking Hawkeye...
00:23:15
Speaker
They fixed him up in dar no yeah Daredevil. they Yeah, they fixed him up in Daredevil, but like they already fucked him up in Hawkeye. Because it's comics! That's how it works! You don't get the same characterization in the same universe!
00:23:27
Speaker
Anyways, Ed... It's the same universe! fixing the movie Because they're different writers, isn't it? Yeah, I would just easily tie him into a Spider-Man universe and you don't have to even show Spider-Man.
00:23:39
Speaker
It could just be him trying to track down Spider-Man to get him back home. I don't know. And then he just, and then just like, I don't know, but then he has like no agency if he just gets Isekai back after the fix.
00:23:55
Speaker
Maybe. oh no, there's a way I can help you out with this one if you let me. No. yeah Use it for your fix. I'm the failure this time. Yeah.
00:24:08
Speaker
Which Spider-Man? Which Spider-Man? Which one would you allude to? Which Spider-Man would I allude to? Yeah.
00:24:18
Speaker
know, it'd be pretty cool if he got Issaac to 2099.
00:24:25
Speaker
That'd be a very interesting movie. Okay. Oscar Isaac? Like it, like it. It wouldn't be Oscar Isaac, though, as live action.
00:24:36
Speaker
He could do it. He could do it.
00:24:40
Speaker
Who's to say he can't? He's too old. He's got the ass for it. He's got the ass. He's got the ass. He's got the ass for it, yeah.
00:24:50
Speaker
I don't know. Just not not to him. I don't know. Somebody else. But would it be Kraven's last hunt? What? You're asking that like we know what you're talking Kraven's last hunt was the definitive Kraven arc. It's where Kraven died.
00:25:07
Speaker
I mean, sure, he can die. I don't care. ah He doesn't have to die. He just change it. I mean, do you think Miguel O'Hara would let him live? Yeah, yeah. If he lost? No, Miguel O'Hara does kill.
00:25:22
Speaker
Doesn't he like mercilessly kill? Doesn't he suck people's blood? he ate no he injects them with poison. That's what the fangs are for. He injects poison with them. It's pretty fucking brutal. that was like That little bit in the movie was for the comic book fans.
00:25:36
Speaker
anyho Sorry. Anywho, yeah, I don't know, just like get him to fight to hunt Miguel O'Hara. Yeah, yet you could tie it into the Spider-Verse universe also. ah Getting Isekai into that.
00:25:48
Speaker
And then he's like, you're a variant! And just kills him.
00:25:56
Speaker
I don't know. I thought the movie was honestly like not as bad as people said it was. It is definitely clear as day. Not as bad as Madame Web.
00:26:09
Speaker
You guys are on crack if you think otherwise. Jesus Christ. Do you guys even remember watching Madame Web? Wrong. we i remember watching it, but i had more fun watching Madame Web.
00:26:21
Speaker
Yes. A movie's purpose is to entertain... That's not no madam with more goes pass Madam Web goes past the so bad it's good into just being straight bad again. no that movie's hilarious to watch a few yeah few scenes. no But no, here, I want to make my point.
00:26:42
Speaker
A movie's purpose is to entertain its audience. Even if it's informative in the form of documentary. Even if it's really weird and trying to be Oscar bait.
00:26:54
Speaker
A movie's purpose is to entertain its out the audience. That's why I hate Blow Up. Because it is not entertaining. It's boring as shit. didn't have to put Up into this. I really didn't, but I'm gonna.
00:27:05
Speaker
That is the antithesis of what a movie is. It's weird and boring and not entertaining. This movie, not as weird, but it it is really boring and not fun to watch.
00:27:17
Speaker
Madame Web? Weird a shit. Loved watching it. It's a good hate watch.
00:27:24
Speaker
I'd fucking watch Madame Web again. I don't agree. Again, i think that Madame Web goes past the So Bad It's Good. I don't think it's even a good hate watch because it's way too bad.
00:27:37
Speaker
You didn't watch it with us. You did not watch it with us. We were having so much fun. Oh man, it was right on that. watched that movie twice. Also. You're fucking masochist. And both times drunk.
00:27:47
Speaker
And it wasn't fun either time. I've been in all the Dark Souls games and I'm calling you a masochist. Like all the Souls games. I'm calling you a masochist, dude. Souls isn't hard. Say that about two.
00:27:59
Speaker
um Okay, well, two is hard because jank, but you know. It's not jank, it's just the enemy placement. Two? That's not important. It's not important. Jank. Jank-ass game. Jank.
00:28:10
Speaker
You could even play it. So, Ruthie, you're next. Okay. Honestly?
00:28:18
Speaker
Honestly? My like about this movie is that that was the fastest I've come up with a fix that deeply entertained me. Because it was right there.
00:28:28
Speaker
and I said it not even like 30 minutes into the movie. Like right now as we're recording, we're 30 minutes in. ah This was about when I came up with my fix and I'll sneak peek it for you.
00:28:42
Speaker
It's Tiger King, baby. Yeah. What I liked about this movie, I liked Chameleon. I liked Rhino. um Did you like The Foreigner?
00:28:53
Speaker
mean, yeah, he was kind of cool. He reminded me of the what that one guy from Schitt's Creek. Which guy from Schitt's Creek? David. I'd never seen the show. Why did I bother asking? The sun, right? The sun with the eyebrows. Oh! Okay, yeah, yeah, yeah. looks like the eyebrows. does, actually. Yes, thank you.
00:29:11
Speaker
But did you like his power, at least? like ah Again, I couldn't tell if he was like freezing time or like hypnotizing. Hector said speedster. I wasn't sure. was No, he was hypnotizing. and he was just Yeah, I thought so at first too, but it was kind of unclear. He of three yeah i was hoping manipulating the procession of time of the people that he was near. I'll be honest, I was hoping for a Zawarudo and I was very disappointed.
00:29:38
Speaker
Zawarudo! Ed, I know you don't care for it. i actually didn't hate the interpretation of Kraven. Like, yeah, he could be the dangerous hunter.
00:29:51
Speaker
and feel like...
00:29:54
Speaker
ah What they did with him was fine. Maybe how he got the powers was a little... Lame. And maybe, like, not super well defined. Because, like, he could...
00:30:06
Speaker
He had all these animal senses, but then there was also like this like trauma thing where he kept imagining how his mom died. Oh, right. I totally forgot about that. Also, I forgot to mention the CGI face.
00:30:18
Speaker
Yes. Bring out the CGI face. Please, your CGI face interlude. ah So, at a scene near the, don't know, 75% of the movie, yeah ah there's that point where Calypso goes to Craven's hut.
00:30:35
Speaker
Right. And they're talking. And there's there's a specific scene where it goes back to Calypso. And you can tell really easily that it's like.
00:30:46
Speaker
They like comped on just like her mouth movements and her eyes blinking onto what looks to be a still image. And it looks really bad. Like the easiest way to see is just like looking at her jaw and how it's her chin that moves only, not her jaw when she's talking.
00:31:08
Speaker
It's really fucking weird. And I don't know why they did that. They could have just kept the camera on on Craven. They have enough B-roll to just keep it on him while she's talking because that that was already happening in the scene where she was talking was on Craven's face.
00:31:26
Speaker
But no, they had to show her face again and make it weird and it's stupid and oh my god. And it yeah, it kind of does look AI, but I don't know if it is. Did you notice that they did a lot of ADR for Calypso?
00:31:41
Speaker
ADR? audio like they added the the audio in post like they took it from oh right yes yes yes that is correct super inconsistent at some points and voice i was like what is going on and like there would be times where her chin isn't moving and her she's turned away from the camera but like you can clearly hear her where like like like it's like her mouth is right next to a mic because it is yeah um
00:32:09
Speaker
Yeah, I did i did notice that some of the stuff was when she was talking, but I didn't put to and to that it was... her She recorded her lines in post.
00:32:20
Speaker
Some of her lines. But the accent was different, Yeah. Yeah. The accent work in this movie, other than the little brother, honestly, I think the little brother had a good accent, so good Russian accent, but yeah, everything else is kind of Russell Crowe can't do in the Russian accent or convincing one at least.
00:32:42
Speaker
It was very like stereotypical American, but like on the opposite end of like, if we're going to put like a diametric, like, or what is it called? ah spectrum. Yeah. There's David Harbour in Black Widow.
00:32:55
Speaker
And then there's Russell Crowe in Kraven. Where, like, David Harbour's just really entertaining and kind of fun and kind of, like, jovial. Kind of, like, no not making fun of a Russian accent, but, like...
00:33:08
Speaker
hamming it up. My favorite, can I quickly as a side note, my favorite part Black Widow is when they show him getting the tattoo whilea while arm wrestling. had just gotten my first tattoo, so my parents and my brother all looked at me were like pointing at their arms where I have my tattoo.
00:33:23
Speaker
They're like, eh, eh, eh. I'm guys, please. Yeah, it it was funny. It was pretty, it was the most entertaining part of the movie. I'm not saying movie was bad, it's fine, but yeah. um It's another movie like this one where it's just Deep mid.
00:33:40
Speaker
Yeah. Like Minds of Moria. Deep mid. do you want to They delved too deep into the mid. Rock and Stone. Rocketstone!
00:33:51
Speaker
Do you want to keep going? Yeah. ah Sounds like it's a good time for me to segue into what I didn't like about this movie. um It was really boring. like It's super generic, but it's also like really messy.
00:34:03
Speaker
It felt like a plot that I could slap together unmedicated um if I just wanted to focus on cool shots of Aaron Taylor Johnson without a shirt on.
00:34:17
Speaker
If that was like my priorities, this is the movie I would make. You know what I mean? Quick comment, Ruthie. You saying you could write this script unmedicated is like the most brutal shade. Oh my God.
00:34:34
Speaker
And then, I don't know, he goes outside and he can't sleep because it's he's an animal. like He's got animal thoughts and it's too loud. And then he comes back and, of oh no, brother gone.
00:34:47
Speaker
Yeah, I don't know. It was just really all over the place. There was a lot of decisions from characters that made no goddamn sense to me. um There was, like, this weird... The movie was, like, trying to say, like, toxic masculinity is bad, but then it... Only when his dad was around.
00:35:08
Speaker
Yeah, but then, like, Kraven would make no decisions that, like... differentiated super un-toxically masculine like you could be masculine and you cannot be toxic buffly walks into room mean i do that masculinely breasts boobly into room behind two guards yeah he could have done more stuff like that i guess i don't know um My point being, like, thematically, weak.
00:35:41
Speaker
Characters, weak. Plot, weak. CGI snow leopard, tight as fuck.
00:35:50
Speaker
um Calypso, like I kind of said earlier, she felt like a lamppost. She did not feel useful to the plot except at the very from the bare very beginning and, like, little bit at the end.
00:36:03
Speaker
Otherwise, she did not need to be in the movie. Like, she was supposed to be- Oh, right. She was supposed to be an asset for Kraven so he could hunt people that he wasn't able to hunt.
00:36:14
Speaker
But how the fuck did he find out about her? How the fuck did he know that she was the one who saved him? She was only useful once. She was only useful once for yeah some information, but he already had most of it.
00:36:27
Speaker
They have written her out by just- the tiger blood that gets on him is what saves him instead of the... Lion blood. Lion blood. So would it be a radioactive lion?
00:36:39
Speaker
Sure. Who cares? Um... Yeah, like... Oh, and there is a part where he's, like, getting information. Or, like, most of the movie. He's getting the movie... He's getting... Alright, let me do that again.
00:36:55
Speaker
In most of the movie, he's getting the information himself. And... Also, he's super rich, but, like, how's he getting the money? Is he, like, a trust fund kid?
00:37:08
Speaker
His dad just lets him have the trust fund? I assume his brother loans him the money. Yeah, but his dad doesn't like his brother enough to, like, give him the trust fund. Let's be real. don't know.
00:37:20
Speaker
Like, the most- That's a good point. I was just trying to, like- When we were watching the movie, Hector suggested maybe he just steals from the people he kills. That makes the most sense, but, like- Also, they bring up the list, but then he doesn't really use it again. he doesn't have list?
00:37:37
Speaker
Yeah, or it's like, yeah, like, the list comes up twice. But we only ever see it the one time. Yeah, it's mostly just like, ooh, it's a list. And he's supposed to be like this badass ghost assassin, but then like, everybody, don't know.
00:37:54
Speaker
How did that fucking camera know that he was known as the Kraven when he only called himself that? And there was like no DNA evidence this or anything. That movie is fucking That was messy. I didn't think about that.
00:38:08
Speaker
This movie is garbage. Deep. Mid. Mid's too nice. Mid's too nice. Delved too deep and found Kraven. It's still better than Madam Web.
Humorous Rewrites: 'Kraven' as 'Tiger King'
00:38:22
Speaker
Well you fix it Ruthie? So here's what happens. During a random safari experience with his father and his brother, Kraven, what, Sergei.
00:38:37
Speaker
Sergei's on a hunting trip with his dad and the rhino and Dimitri and they find this lion. ah He's protecting his brother and then his dad dies, right?
00:38:50
Speaker
Right. His dad dies in front of him. So then we don't have Russell Crowe anymore. Problem solved. A lot of this movie could be solved without Russell Crowe. I like Russell Crowe as an actor. This movie's like... Nah.
00:39:04
Speaker
Nah. No. Then the lion goes after Sergei. Maybe Sergei finally fires the gun after his dad is dead. ah and then the lion almost gets him.
00:39:15
Speaker
But doesn't quite kill him. I'll keep Calypso for... some reason. I won't have a radioactive lion. um Anyways, this is what makes him Craven TBD.
00:39:30
Speaker
ah Craven decides, fuck my dad. i don't want to be a mobster like him. I'm gonna sell his information and then I'm going to live a clean life. And you know what he decides to do with his clean living?
00:39:45
Speaker
Move to fucking Miami and open a wildlife park a la tiger king he rescues abused animals and he has a park full of wild fucking animals with his little brother the eventually chameleon uh the plot of this movie is this man just wants to retire from mob life and like getting sucked back in. He keeps getting sucked back in by like Rhino, by Foreigner, by like all these agents because they think that he still has more information from his father's like criminal mastermind-ness and he's like guys I'm 30. It's been 15 years.
00:40:29
Speaker
Of course I fucking don't know who has the drugs.
00:40:36
Speaker
And uh I think he does hunt men for sport but like He's just insane like that. Yeah. ah He played like Zoo Tycoon and he would drop people in the middle of the park. you know We've all done that.
00:40:50
Speaker
Craven does hunt, I think, people in certain... Yes. I read the Ultimate Spider-Man comic. What, you did? You know what ah you don' would have been a better movie also? Sorry, i say that one more time. You mentioned he he hunts men for sports.
00:41:07
Speaker
You could just made a dangerous game movie just with Kraven instead. To be fair, and the new ultimate spider in the new Ultimate Spider-Man series, he does hunt people. He hunts them in the dinosaur lands, too. yeah So he literally does the most dangerous game. yeah But with dinosaurs, too. yeah no yeah Some fucking idiot thinks it's cool to, like, poach tiger cubs.
00:41:31
Speaker
Kraven's after you, bitch.
00:41:35
Speaker
Oh, I also did like the... the Like, if you notice, Kraven, whenever he's eating in the movie, he defaults to... I think he's like a He's either a pescatarian or he only eats meat that he kills.
00:41:50
Speaker
I thought that was an interesting detail. And I would absolutely keep that in this movie. Yes, that means he's a cannibal. It's funny. they That's funny. I think they said he was going to be vegetarian originally. Yeah, I thought he was going to be.
00:42:02
Speaker
I thought I heard. And I think people complained enough that they added the scene of him eating the fish. Pussy ass bitches. Well, I mean, i to be him vegetarian is kind of fucking stupid. Like, I'm gonna say it. Homeboy does need, like, Homeboy needs protein to be the most dangerous hunter, but still, like, who is he ass bitch? And to also hopefully walk into a room.
00:42:22
Speaker
Yes, to breast boobly into rooms with no one watching. um But yeah, I did notice, yeah, it seems that he only eats things that he successfully hunts.
00:42:35
Speaker
yeah make him cannibal Make him a cannibal. Yes, he should absolutely be a cannibal.
00:42:40
Speaker
Damn. Just don't eat the brain and you're fine. Long pork. What? um
00:42:50
Speaker
But yeah, um I don't know if maybe Calypso like maybe they're like pen pals. I don't know how much I want her involved in the movie.
00:43:02
Speaker
I did think it was cool that they weren't like super romance-y with each other? That's like the one plus. I was expecting it. I know, right? Because it happens in Venom 1. Well, happens in Morbius.
00:43:15
Speaker
earth Yeah, Morbius. But then it didn't happen Madame Web. Well, because there's no dudes. No, there's Ben Parker. They're like buds, and he was already married. Yeah, I'm saying I liked that in Madame Web.
00:43:28
Speaker
Yeah. But it happened in Morbius. I was expecting it in Madame Web, but that was surprisingly feminist in that one aspect. And then, Still worse than this movie.
00:43:40
Speaker
Okay. You're entitled to your bad opinion. This is a free country. You know, the more you state your opinion, the less you are at convincing us. I don't care. Okay.
00:43:53
Speaker
Um... Yeah, I guess that's it. Rhino is trying- Maybe Rhino is trying to do like the Carole Baskin thing where he's like, oh, i I'm gonna like open my own rival park and I'm gonna drive you out of that business and then you'll join the mob with me. And Craven's like, fuck you.
00:44:12
Speaker
and don't know.
00:44:15
Speaker
Alright, I guess it's my turn. I would watch your movie. um Same with Ed. So you guys both did really good. um My likes- The actor playing Rhino, Alessandro Nivola, I had to get his name right.
00:44:28
Speaker
Perfect. No notes. Just chew the serum more than a flock of cows in the valley. Perfection.
00:44:38
Speaker
I like that the movie was globetrotting. Makes sense for a Hunter movie, you know?
00:44:45
Speaker
The one time they used a chameleon effect, I did actually kind of like it. Yeah, it was understated. It just felt weird that they added that final scene there like that. Yeah. It just, don't know. The face-changing scene? Mm-hmm. It felt like, oh, we we're gonna hit the chameleon, but we already know it's gonna get cancelled. I don't, i don't know.
00:45:03
Speaker
The voice-changing was subtle enough. Yeah, I liked that. No, I think the chameleon bit should have been the next film, like a surprise twist. Like he set someone else up to be Dimitri.
00:45:16
Speaker
And then he's running away as one of the guards or something. He's just right to self. ah you just you You don't need to add anything. Just have him do the voices. That's it. yes it i My dislikes.
00:45:29
Speaker
I like Russell Crowe. And he deserved better in this film. I don't know. valid Wasn't he in fucking Nice Guys? yes yeah he dessert Yeah, he can do better.
00:45:41
Speaker
I guess said earlier, Aaron Taylor Johnson can be good actor, but between this and his performance in Nosferatu, 2024 was not his year. And also, like, no one was having fun at all. I haven't seen a bigger black hole in film since Interstellar.
00:45:55
Speaker
It's just... Nice. Thank you. I did write that one down. ah I hated everything. Of what I just said? Yeah.
00:46:07
Speaker
That's fair. Russell Crowe is also, you know, Maximus in Gladiator, so... i haven't seen I haven't seen all of Gladiator. Oh, right. he's in Yeah, he is Maximus. yeah You guys haven't seen the first one? No, I've seen Gladiator. I've seen the second half.
00:46:22
Speaker
I miss the first half every time it comes out on TV. I've only seen the scene of him kissing his dead white wife's feet and surprisingly sweet. Yeah. yeah Ed, I'm sorry. I didn't i didn't like the Foreigner.
00:46:37
Speaker
Like props the intern at Sony who rediscovered a forgotten super village. But like, fuck dude. it It just felt like they needed someone else for some goddamn reason to add more steaks. I'm gonna drink heavily tonight.
00:46:49
Speaker
I'll probably join you if I had actual alcohol. We do. Oh yeah, we do. I'll probably drink heavily tonight too. The action is kind of lame considering he has super agility and strength. He could have had lot more fun.
00:47:01
Speaker
Give him a lot animal senses, you know? ah Ruthie brought up that London could have been used better, and I really agree with her on that. I didn't notice it, and I'm like, ugh, it can't get in my head.
00:47:14
Speaker
i mentioned the actress. Also, the action's were really forgettable. I don't remember much about this movie. All I remember is that one bit where he's like kind of slithering like a snake. kind of like Kind of twerking and he when he's like trying to find his brother in Turkey.
00:47:30
Speaker
yeah. Yeah. Oh, right. I remember he ran up the wall. He did do that. He ran up the wall. like, is this Spider-Man now? What's going on here? And then, like, are they going to do the Venom thing where in Ultimate Spider-Man, the com the original version of the comic? I have to differentiate it now.
00:47:46
Speaker
Venom just kind of crushes the buildings he's running up, and that's how he comes up walls. It's cool. They don't do that. ah They don't do that after. Isn't that how he always used to do it?
00:47:59
Speaker
No, he has He can use a... I think he can use a symbiote to stick. Yeah, symbiote's sticky.
00:48:08
Speaker
Fun fact, in the current comics, Mary Jane is Venom now. hate it. Yeah. I'm willing to see how it goes, but a lot of people hate it. I don't read comic. I just like read the synopsis every time comes out. Dude, just stop getting Mary Jane involved in all this shit. like She doesn't need to be involved. You you get it, but like the writers don't.
00:48:27
Speaker
ah The writers don't. Fixes. Craven already has the lion pelt when he starts. that' it That sick looks shit. but that's Wow. cause that shit look That shit looks sick. That slick looks shit.
00:48:40
Speaker
No, I said that sick looks shit. and all That shit looks sick. I turned in a paper yesterday, if you guys can't tell. ah My pudding brain has infected us all. I'm sorry.
00:48:52
Speaker
So, Dimitri was always sick, so he kept going to doctors. Okay. And he'd be telling his dad, like, any money for this? Any money for this? So, they'll just send it over. You know, American schools.
00:49:06
Speaker
His son was... Aaron Taylor Johnson was either raised in Russia or London. That way have his fucking accent.
00:49:17
Speaker
Dimitri was raised in America, from those parts. You know, fancier schools, he was more studious.
00:49:23
Speaker
Russell Crowe's character has the kidnapping plot early, but instead gets kidnapped himself due the rhino betraying him for never taking him seriously.
00:49:33
Speaker
Craven's asked by Dimitri rescue their father. Kraven's the big bad distraction. Dimitri's the one sneaking in. And Dimitri's oddly fast and we don't know what he's doing. You see him talking to people and maybe you see him going like, wait, what? And then he like bonks them in the head or whatever.
00:49:50
Speaker
but Or shoots them. Or shoots them. Right? He steals someone's gun. But like we don't know how he's doing it. Like it shouldn't just be the voice. That makes no goddamn sense.
00:50:01
Speaker
And then Dimitri and Kraven are fighting Rhino. Kraven wears him down. And then Dimitri takes a lucky shot at the injection point, shoots him.
00:50:11
Speaker
And then while Kraven's knocked out, Dimitri, we see him turn into Kraven. That's where we get the reveal that those doctor visits were for, also for the chameleon stuff.
00:50:25
Speaker
He turns into Kraven, shoots his dad, makes him his dad think, oh, my son betrayed me. Damn. Like, oh, i expected Dimitri.
00:50:35
Speaker
Kraven wakes up, sees the last hit just in time to see the transformation a little bit. He's like, what happened? Then he says what happened. But now Dimitri owns the Empire. We're halfway through the film at this point.
00:50:49
Speaker
And then he has an escape plan and Kraven can't find him because it could be anyone. And I'll say the clothes change too. i can say it's just some weird nanotech technology or whatever.
00:50:59
Speaker
Because in the comics, Chameleon does also change his, uh,
00:51:05
Speaker
um he does almost change his clothes.
00:51:12
Speaker
So, the rest of the them trying to find hints of what's going on, keep an eye out for everyone. i think the first time that they met that Chameleon messes up is he has a guy with eye patch. It's on the wrong side because he looked it through a mirror, which is a classic Spider-Man way he's done it.
00:51:27
Speaker
tie that in. But by the end, he has to just start smelling. you know, he has the super smell. Never came up. So, Kraven can just scent smell really well. And also, he doesn't even have superpowers, really.
00:51:38
Speaker
I think he's just a really good hunter. Like, the serum brought him back to life, but it didn't really do much... So it's just that Dimitri puts on like too much Chanel number five and that's what- Oh no, it's just you can say, um, maybe I'm thinking like- Well no, cause he's like a fancy boy. Yeah. is he a fancy boy in yours, I should say. I think he's still a kind of fancy boy in mine, but I think he also just like, how do say it?
00:52:03
Speaker
I think it's also like Craven knows his brother's smell. Like, there's something. it Maybe it's a mix of, like, the perf... He was so sickly, the, like, it couldn't fully escape it, so he wears a lot of perfume to hide it.
00:52:16
Speaker
So then he's like, oh, I can smell the mix. And that's what... I don't know, that's how he gets them at the end. I think he might have to kill him.
00:52:25
Speaker
I don't know. I couldn't figure out I wanted him to kill him or not. Death. Death? Death. He eats his brother, too. Bailiff, whack off his pee-pee. What the fuck?
00:52:36
Speaker
It's a meme. I didn't hear... never heard off. I just heard, Bailiff, don't make him bring... I don't want him to come back here. Smack him in the pee-pee. That was it, yeah. The wackest pee-pee, y'all.
00:52:49
Speaker
Yeah, that's my fix. I don't have much. It was just kind of like... This movie sucked. It was so bad. TLDR movie sucked. Not as bad as Madame Web. Worse. It's not as bad, it was worse.
00:53:01
Speaker
We both win here, Ed. It was not as bad, it was worse. No, it it's not as bad. It was better. um still Still kind of bad. Still ass.
00:53:14
Speaker
um
00:53:17
Speaker
Okay. ah To extend our episode out a little because of tariffs, I guess. I hate this joke. ah If you had to take all the characters of the Morbverse and make a movie out of the all three of them fighting spider-man yes all three of them i said three venom morbius craven i wasn't including venom madam web isn't a villain don't fucking know madam web morbius craven have them fight spider-man go
00:53:56
Speaker
How would I do it? Yeah. No. No. They're all like, hey, i hairbu this so I hear about this hip new restaurant. Let's all go to it. And then they all go to this hip new restaurant, even though Morbius can't even eat food anymore. Maybe he can eat it through other people's blood. don't know. You just get the the the cra like the animal Spider-Man villains that you're missing, like Scorpion.
00:54:20
Speaker
Okay. And then what? Scorpion does become Venom. Matt Gargan becomes Venom. god, shut the fuck up, Hector. I was trying to help you out, but fine. No, I'm just saying, like, we bring in we bring in Scorpion.
00:54:35
Speaker
Okay, and then what happens? And then we have Scorpion in a movie, and that's great. Okay. He's already gonna be in no... He can potentially be in Spider-Man 4. But, like, make a movie out of it. Don't just say Scorpion. He was in Spider-Man Homecoming.
00:54:51
Speaker
ah homecoming
00:54:54
Speaker
And Shocker was in that one too. Yes. Yes, but no one likes Shocker. He's such an unserious villain. he's an um He's the beginner one for Spider-Man. he He's a joke everywhere else.
00:55:07
Speaker
Yeah, but I like Shocker. No, I do too, but he's kind of... Imagine if he punched people with like the Shocker, that the hand thing. He does. With the shocker? Yes! They're just super durable. It's just everyone in Marvel's a more durable person. No, no, I'm talking about... Like a normal-ass person?
00:55:24
Speaker
If you punched her? Never mind, it's going over your head. i don't want to explain it. Okay.
00:55:31
Speaker
Okay, but anyways, my question is still hanging in the air. So you have him in a restaurant. but Yeah, like the inverse of the Shorma scene at the end of Avengers. So it'd just be a reverse of the Avengers movie.
00:55:42
Speaker
Yeah, they meet first. They're friendly. They're just hanging out, talking about how much they fucking hate Spider-Man. all of a sudden, they're like, we should commit a crime so we can kill Spider-Man. And then they, like, steal 26 pies.
00:55:53
Speaker
And Spider-Man's just like, because that's a lot of pies. but There's a whole joke about, like, Lex Luthor. Like, he stole 26 pies. That's a lot pies. It's one of those kids' books. okay. To teach them how to read. Okay. Okay. I was hoping if someone could get the deep cut while going to explain it. oh it I would just add Scorpion to the mix.
00:56:10
Speaker
oh Okay, but like, give me a plot. No.
00:56:16
Speaker
You can have J. Jonah Jameson hire them because Scorpion was made by J. Jonah Jameson. He paid for the development of Scorpion. Oops.
00:56:28
Speaker
Yeah, no, it it comes up. Dude, you telling me to come up with a plot and me saying no reminded me of a that scene Seven Psychopaths. was like, get your hands up.
00:56:40
Speaker
No. but Why not? Because I don't want to. But I have a gun. and don't care. but the that doesn't make any sense.
00:56:52
Speaker
Too bad. ah But yeah, that would be my way of doing it. just They all meet up. They all fucking hate Spider-Man. They commit crimes.
00:57:03
Speaker
And they're trying to get Spider-Man to face him? Yeah, so it's a trap. He's like, oh, it's you guys. He's like, I mean, why is Kraken? Then they just date try to smack him like the dojo scene.
00:57:14
Speaker
it's like you know They all start kicking the shit of him. That's what they're imagining. Doesn't happen.
00:57:21
Speaker
Or maybe it does at first. Then he just wins. Yeah, he's Spider-Man. He's Spider-Man. Oh, I include Scorpion. Scorpion stings Kraven. And then the poison makes Kraven think all these ah superheroes slash supervillains that are animals are just animals in New York. And that's why he's hunting them.
00:57:44
Speaker
Okay. I dig it. Okay. Okay.
00:57:52
Speaker
It's so stupid. I dig it. I dig it.
00:57:58
Speaker
Okay. I haven't played
00:58:03
Speaker
Injustice, but I think I'd do something like that where for some reason Spider-Man is like, don't know, like possessed or something and he's clearly not friendly or neighborhood focused and ah for some reason all of these ah These
Exploring 'Bridgerton': Romance and Drama
00:58:20
Speaker
antiheroes have to coalesce in New York City to stop Spider-Man.
00:58:28
Speaker
Probably because they're like, this might be the only time we can kill them without getting arrested for it. Well, in my mind, you're doing this in an assumption that they've already met Spider-Man. For me, in this movie that I am making here on the spot, they've never met Spider-Man.
00:58:44
Speaker
Okay. Just like, oh, this guy's a superhero. I've seen him do, like, good stuff. Fuck, he totally just murked that guy. That was, like, a normal guy, and now that person is very dead.
00:58:55
Speaker
I guess I gotta do something about it. It would probably be Madam Web instigating this, because, you know, she's got, like, the foresight and shit. Um... They call up Kraven in... While he's in Florida, he may or may not be, like, eating a man's beating heart out of somebody's chest.
00:59:15
Speaker
But he does pick up, you know. He's that rude.
00:59:20
Speaker
I dig it. I dig it. dig I'm just kidding. Morbius is like, oh, you're into blood too? Cool, we're gonna be great friends.
00:59:32
Speaker
Anything you guys have been watching?
00:59:35
Speaker
I give this movie a D. Yeah, yeah it's like a good D. D for Dimitri. Yeah, but yeah okay so you guys give it a D. Say it's not as bad as Madame Web, but you guys gave Madame Web an F. Yeah, but it was like a fun F. It was an effort F essay for F. F is for French who do stuff together. U is for you and me.
00:59:57
Speaker
Anyways, i i finished watching Finally, the Midnight Club. ah That is the same guy that the ah Mike Flanagan, Haunting of Hill House, Bly Manor, Midnight Mass.
01:00:16
Speaker
He certainly likes Midnight. Yeah. So there were supposed to be two seasons of Midnight Club. And it's not happening.
01:00:27
Speaker
all So it's definitely his weakest because it's not a finished story.
01:00:33
Speaker
unfortunately. You know he's doing a Clayface film? I don't care. i'm i i don't care. and I don't care. Werewolf. Werewolf is all I care about right now.
01:00:46
Speaker
Werewolf? Werewolf. Werewolf. Werewolf. That's the one... That's the Robert Eggert film, isn't it? Yeah, Werewolf.
01:00:57
Speaker
Werewolf. Ed, please tell me you've seen Young Frankenstein. I have seen Young Frankenstein. Okay. Good. You just butchered it the worst way I've ever used to it. Yeah, come on, Young Frankenstein? Frankenstein. Frankenstein. Frankenstein?
01:01:18
Speaker
i've I've only seen it once, and I remember it was... Or, like, i i only caught on that he was saying fixing the stein to stein. didn't know it Frankenstein. Frankenstein.
01:01:30
Speaker
Well, because he's trying to distance himself from Frankenstein. It's... Yeah, it's probably my... I think it's my favorite one of his films. Yeah. i don't yeah like lot. Yeah, I've seen Blazing Saddles. No, we watched Blazing Saddles, he didn't like I'm not a big fan of his style of comedy.
01:01:49
Speaker
These are... But these are common... I like that line. Yeah, that's a good quote. That's a good one. The new clay of the... Or the common clay the New West. You know... mor Morons. yeah so That's fine. I just don't like what's on his name.
01:02:05
Speaker
Mel Brooks. it's His endings are usually kind of weak. Although Young Frankenstein, that was written by Gene Wilder. Young Frankenstein was written by Gene Wilder? Yeah, Mel produced it. What about Charlie and the Chocolate Factory?
01:02:19
Speaker
Not associated with Mel Brooks. That's Gene Wilder. Oh, Mel Brooks. Gene Wilder. Talking about Gene Wilder. The two of them were friends. I watched the... I guess this is my plug. I watched the like ah the biography of Gene Wilder that's on Netflix.
01:02:33
Speaker
Yeah. It's really cool. They talk about young Frankenstein. He he wrote the movie. I think Mel directed it? Or he directed it? Gene Wilder directed it? I just love the ending of Charlie and the Chocolate Factory.
01:02:48
Speaker
You lose! Good day, sir! That wasn't scripted. His outburst wasn't scripted? Shit. I think he's letting him have free reign. Yeah, he had a lot of free reign in that movie. Et cetera, et cetera?
01:03:04
Speaker
Yeah. The tunnel song? Not in the script. I thought they didn't know. i thought that was in the script. Also, the rest of the cast didn't know about it. His tumble in the beginning also wasn't part of the script.
01:03:17
Speaker
Yeah. Yes. Yeah. Um, what? Oh, and Hector and I have been watching the pet. Oh yeah. The pits. I heard, I heard, or I,
01:03:29
Speaker
i see It's been recommended to me, like, the Dr. Mike video where he watches the pit and it he says it's pretty accurate, I guess. It's yeah pretty good. it its It's... I haven't seen anything like that in a while. It's pretty good. I've also watched Vinland Saga and just started Farmland Saga.
01:03:51
Speaker
that's when the story starts getting good supposedly in farmland saga yes because that's where the rest of the story i think is it's really good it's just nice so because you're not supposed to go into it for the right you're yeah you're if you like okay hold on it's gonna be amazing but you gotta to be patient with all i'm saying all i'm saying is i heard that the first one is like in england or like england dan danish uh
01:04:20
Speaker
Denmark, right? They go back and forth. Second one is all in the farm in England also. Or are they? No, they're in Denmark now.
01:04:32
Speaker
Is the farm? The farm is in Denmark. Never mind. The first one's in England. The second one's in Denmark. The third one's in Iceland. And the fourth one, apparently, is actually in Vinland.
01:04:44
Speaker
Hmm. They actually get to Vinland. Well, point being, though, at the story, I fear at the point where I think you're at. I've never seen it, but got spoiled on some shit. Farm. the point where Yeah, you're at the point where it becomes a completely different show.
01:04:57
Speaker
Yes. ah Thorfinn, the main character, is dead inside. That's how the that's how the second season starts. Yeah. He's literally dead inside. Don't say anything more. But yeah. Yeah. No, I've heard that's the point where it gets good.
01:05:09
Speaker
Or it if it gets amazing if you're patient with it. I am being patient with it. I am already fully invested. there's no way I'm not continuing to Yeah, I to to know you. You and I have similar tastes as much as we disagree on, like... Yeah, I gave it... i Like, I usually give animes, like, three episodes before i drop it or continue.
01:05:32
Speaker
And yeah, this one hooked me on episode two. Nice. Have you ever dropped an anime really fast? There was one I dropped years ago. I got 10 minutes in and I'm like, it's one dude who's kind of like a teenager, grown, like young adult, like 18, 19, 20. Right.
01:05:48
Speaker
And he's like, I think it was like government agency thing. And I noticed every character outside of him was like a little girl. Or Little Girl Coded?
01:05:59
Speaker
And I i didn't know. It was like, okay, one, two. As soon as I got to the third, I'm like, okay, i see what's going on here And I just left. I was like, no. Yeah. i I dropped Kaiju number eight halfway into episode two.
01:06:13
Speaker
My man, you did the right thing. Season one's great. Season two onwards, it sucks because I've read it. I'm reading it still. Every week, I'm just like, it's almost done. So I'm like, I'm just still reading it. Mm-hmm.
01:06:25
Speaker
I can't. even read the spin-off. I'm such a hater. It's crazy because my co-workers and old roommate love Kaiju No. 8. They're reading it also and they love it. Oh, don't. Tell to stop. Tell them to stop. It gets bad. They're already caught up on the reading. And they still like it?
01:06:42
Speaker
Yeah. What the fuck? I'm trying not to judge. hey I'm not going to judge. this i'm not My roommate is the kind of guy that likes fucking... ah What is it?
01:06:53
Speaker
What is it?
01:06:58
Speaker
He likes Hunter. Okay, Hunter Hunter is good, but like he he doesn't get Code Geass and he doesn't like it at all. And we just got like when we were watching it together, we were like two episodes in after you.
01:07:14
Speaker
Wow. And he still didn't like it. He still hated it. and the You know, his number one complaint about it, the art style.
01:07:26
Speaker
ah is i havet He doesn't like how like how like lanky and skinny they look. he And I'm like, it's nots you you love One Piece! How about you, is he homophobic? Because they've got the yaoi hands.
01:07:37
Speaker
They do, actually. like art is But the thing is the thing is the thing is, he watches One Piece, Sanji, Luffy, look exactly the same.
01:07:50
Speaker
They're skinny and lanky. and All the characters are lanky as fuck. Except for the women's boobs. Well, most of them. except for frank Except for like Frankie and Jimbae.
01:08:02
Speaker
Yeah, but even Frankie. But Frankie's still pretty lanky. Isn't he taller than everybody else? ah so So pre-Time Skip Frankie is lanky.
01:08:14
Speaker
Post-Time Skip Frankie, he's actually a fucking tank. ah Like, literally. Huh. but huh Oh, also, Ed, since you enjoyed Aaron Taylor Johnson's performance in Nosferatu, you would enjoy Bridgerton deeply.
01:08:35
Speaker
No, I wouldn't. Yes, you Yes, you would. No, I wouldn't. Ed would love He'll be like, I don't like it. And then like three to four up episodes in, he's like, oh, I am. Ed, you you told us you are a sucker for romances.
01:08:47
Speaker
Let me give you the premise of season one. And then you can tell me. How much pining is there? ah So much. dear so is I don't like it when it's too much. No, no, no, no, no.
01:08:58
Speaker
i There's enough subplots to balance it out. No, it's it's it's a lot of romance media overdoes it on the pining. I feel like Bridgerton, especially season one, space season one has a special place in my heart.
01:09:13
Speaker
It does a really good job about balancing the pining. And our loins. Okay, premise of season one, right? Shut up. Sorry.
01:09:25
Speaker
I'm not going to watch it, Ruthie. The old... bet the oldest daughter of this household is getting on the marriage market and she's been like handpicked by the queen and by the newest gossip monger in London that she's the hot commodity and she's trying to make bank right she's trying to bag bag the right husband but everybody's too fucking intimidated to talk to her and she's panicking at the same time the most eligible bachelor who cannot stand the thought of marriage is in town.
01:10:00
Speaker
And he's like, listen, people keep trying to marry their daughters to me. You want any other man to have your hand. Let's fake date for this season.
01:10:12
Speaker
And somebody's going to pick you off to get married and I can fuck off to the country. Cool. I still hate your guts.
01:10:21
Speaker
That's season one, baby. ah And then
Current Shows and Films: A Lighthearted Chat
01:10:25
Speaker
there's trauma. Okay, that that that was a good sell. Yeah. and that and no And there's also trauma involved. Yes. Oh, yeah. Okay, so i'm gonna I'm keeping this all in, by the way.
01:10:35
Speaker
yeah Anyways, ah who's the next? ah so i did get to say what I watched. Oh, sorry. Go ahead, Hector. Huh? Didn't you say something? No.
01:10:45
Speaker
Okay. Go ahead, Hector. You meanies. I have nothing to recommend.
01:10:54
Speaker
ah Oh, watch Sinners. i Oh, yeah, i want I'm seeing it tomorrow. yeah I'm seeing it. I'm gonna go watch Legend of Oki tomorrow. Legend of what? Oki. It's an A24 film.
01:11:05
Speaker
they're doing kids It's a kids film they're doing. but This movie had controversy when the trailer dropped because everyone's giving A24 shit for having an AI character in the movie, and it is not AI at all. The director's a really good puppeteer.
01:11:19
Speaker
It's a puppet.
01:11:22
Speaker
Oh yeah, I've seen trailers of it. i thought it was obviously a puppet. Also, Willem Dafoe is in it, and I think he's a good actor. and He's a great actor. He's Willem Dafoe in my heart. He's Dafoe? He's Dafoe.
01:11:35
Speaker
He's Dafoe. He's Willem Dafoe. So, um, I... So, I... I... Wow, I lost everything tape. I've been playing Lies of P. And I am... I've been having a good time. It is a little...
01:11:52
Speaker
He's a real boy. The timing's different for parrying the knights. think it's my turn. Well, let me... I'll talk about that after the episode. I think to leave as surprise for reason.
01:12:04
Speaker
But... um That's my one thing. Are you a real boy yet? ah Let me look down at my pants. No, I'm not. So... Wait, let me check my purse.
01:12:18
Speaker
I am. What? Because I got purse. Beepus. Oh, you can't. Wait, you've never heard the he's got her his balls in her purse thing?
01:12:30
Speaker
She's got his balls in the purse. Yeah, yeah. yeah i eat it as bowl i know i Yeah, I've heard of it. Just give me second to remember. Um, what? There was one more thing.
01:12:42
Speaker
Oh, I got the new Hunger Games book. I have i just finished my classes. I'm going to start reading it I've heard amazing and you're gonna cry really it's a is it her best i don't know i just heard that people are like i i've got a but ton of instagram reels of people being like oh my god okay so good i need that so after the term i had i need that so perfect i'll let you all know next time how it is um next time we're leaving it a potential surprise due to reasons
01:13:16
Speaker
You don't have to say it
Teasers and Future Guests
01:13:17
Speaker
like that. Reasons! You can say it. We're going to probably have, if it works out, we'll have a guest. And we will, it'll be different.
01:13:29
Speaker
One you all haven't seen in a while. Anyway. ah Give us five stars. Follow us. We have a Discord. Wait, up. I missed it. did Did we mention the movie you were watching No, because I mentioned we're having a guest.
01:13:42
Speaker
Oh, that's right. so we're going have a guest. He will, they will, he, she, she, they will pick the movie, right? Yeah. They already picked it. Oh, no.
01:13:54
Speaker
but we have to do, it might take a little longer because i got to do some, we got to do some. There's some prep work. There's some prep work for this one. um I get to pull out my ukulele if I'm lucky. Probably not. But. You keep saying that.
01:14:06
Speaker
No? Anyway.
Podcast on YouTube? A Humorous Debate
01:14:09
Speaker
ah Give us five stars or something. I don't know. Like the bell. so Subscribe. Hit the bell. don't know. yeah i don't know Have a evening. We'll send Jacksepticeye after you. I don't know.
01:14:23
Speaker
If we're doing the YouTube. Yeah, who who knows? maybe Maybe once I get a camera, we'll do YouTube. We're already on YouTube, Ed. We're on YouTube? yeah Shit. We've mentioned this eight times. You're like, we're on YouTube? Dude, literally told you about our YouTube stats earlier, like well what last week? Last week, yeah And you're like, we're on YouTube?
01:14:40
Speaker
Right. Yeah, I just keep leaving my fucking smooth brain every time you mention it, I guess. That's okay. That's what our, that's our YouTube audience, in ah like, analytics in a nutshell.
01:14:53
Speaker
Also, Ed, you're saying smooth brain implies you have one, so. o a but if i But if I don't have a brain, then that means the thoughts would stay in the cavity.
Closing Remarks and Teasers for Next Episode
01:15:06
Speaker
But they don't. They just slide right off. No, i just bounce off. they No, no, it just goes right through. yeah Damn. Sometimes you'll hear hear a whistle, too.
01:15:18
Speaker
Like, sub subscribe, and hit the bell. Bye. by
01:15:48
Speaker
Today's film was Kraven the Hunter, directed by J.C. Chandor. The film was written by Richard Wenk, Art Mackam, and Matt Holloway. The cinematographer was Ben Davis.
01:15:59
Speaker
Ghostless and love for the various social media accounts, they made a movie, which is more than we can say here. Thank you, lovely audience, for joining us on the Morbiverse. A wild and... just a wild trip.
01:16:11
Speaker
This next episode episode will be with a guest who has joined us to discuss a remake of a cult classic. Goodbye.