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What Every Mother Should Know Before Giving Birth {Episode 190}
612 Plays2 years ago
It's no secret: we love babies and birth! Mostly because we've learned a thing or two during our past several decades of giving birth. Too many mothers expect to show up at the hospital in labor and have everything go smoothly, but our maternal health care system is failing us and we need to be informed.
If you're feeling called to learn more about birth choices, this episode is the perfect jumping off point to head you in the right direction. We want you (and your baby!) to have the best, healthiest and most peaceful birth possible, and in order to do that, you're going to have to do some research and make some important (and possibly difficult) decisions.
Go to magicspoon.com/OUTNUMBERED to grab a variety pack and try it today! Use our
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You got this, mama!
the link to our new podcast stream
our favorite birth podcasts: Australian Birth Stories, The Birth Hour, Happy Homebirth
Recommended
Transcript
Introduction: Meet Audrey and Bonnie
00:00:07
Speaker
Hello and welcome to Outnumbered the Podcast. I'm Audrey. And I'm Bonnie. We are experienced moms to a combined total of 19 children. In our weekly episodes, we explore relatable topics using our perspectives of humor and chaos. Tune in for advice and encouragement to gain more joy in your parenting journey.
Sponsorship Spotlight: Magic Spoon
00:00:34
Speaker
We are so grateful to Magic Spoon for sponsoring this episode. You guys, I have to say that I have been a cereal fan since I was a very small child. And then growing up, I didn't eat it for breakfast. I started eating it as an afternoon or a midnight snack. It's one of my favorite things. However, when I learned to read a nutrition label, I learned that it was not good for me, like in the least.
00:00:53
Speaker
So enter magic spoon. You guys, this cereal is amazing. One of my kids commented that there's more things that it says on the box are not in it than are in it. And it's true. So in the variety pack, there's four flavors. There's cocoa, fruity, frosted and peanut butter.
00:01:12
Speaker
But this pack has zero grams of sugar, 13 to 14 grams of protein and only four net grams of carbs. So that's about 140 calories per serving. But listen to this. It's keto friendly. It's gluten free. It's grain free. It's soy free and it's low carb. I mean, like a mom's cereal dream. So go to magicspoon.com slash outnumbered to grab a variety pack and try it today. Be sure to use our promo code that's outnumbered at checkout to save $5 off your order.
00:01:39
Speaker
And Magic Spoon is so confident in their product that you have 100% happiness guarantee. If you don't like it for any reason, they will refund your money. No questions asked. Remember, get your next delicious bowl of guilt-free cereal at magicspoon.com slash outnumbered and use the code OUTNUMBER to save $5 off. Thank you again to Magic Spoon for sponsoring this episode.
Passion for Birth and Updates
00:02:00
Speaker
Welcome back, friends. We are so excited to have you here today and to talk about one of our absolutely favorite topics of all time, and that is having babies. Clearly, we like to do that because we had a lot of them. So we both feel really passionately about birth, and we believe that it is a beautiful way, or it can be a beautiful way to welcome your baby into the world. But if you are intentional about it, we'll explain what we mean by that.
00:02:24
Speaker
Okay, but first of all, we wanted to mention a couple of things to you guys, kind of technical behind the scenes here. Recently we have updated our, what's it called? The Bonnie Avatar logo. Yeah. Recently we updated our logo and so it's not the circle of feet anymore. It's a circle, an orange circle with a plus in
New Look, New Platforms
00:02:44
Speaker
it. And another thing that we did recently was we switched hosts, which doesn't really affect you unless you were listening on
00:02:52
Speaker
the website that we used to be hosted by so now if you want to go and listen on the website we are at creator.zencaster.com slash at outnumbered and if you know anybody who was listening on one of those old channels and thinks our podcast has just like disappeared or something we're still here we just need maybe you guys to spread the word and let people know somehow if they have lost us or can't find us that we're still here we just happen to have a new look and a new
00:03:22
Speaker
Behind the scenes, we have a new place, but if you were listening on Apple Podcasts, obviously, we're still in your earbuds and you're good to go. That's right. That's right. The behind the scenes every now and again needs to be tweaked, so hopefully we didn't lose too many of you.
The Intentional Birth Journey
00:03:35
Speaker
Okay, so back to birth, you guys. It's so much fun and exciting to plan to welcome a baby into your life, but there is a lot to think about, and if you've done this before, you know where we're coming from.
00:03:46
Speaker
I will say that I think, in my experience, most women believe that they just show up at the hospital if that's where they're planning on giving birth and barring any major disasters, the baby just comes out, which is lovely when it happens like that, but it just doesn't happen like that very often anymore. There are so many moving parts with labor and birth and our current maternal healthcare system that we just want you to be prepared when going into a birth for what you need to watch out for.
00:04:13
Speaker
Yes, yes, we are really passionate about this because Bonnie and I have each had so many beautiful birth experiences. And that was because we were so intentional about what we wanted those experiences to look like. And we came to love that experience or appreciate it so much that we would love to fight for every woman to be able to have an intentional birth as well. So in this episode, when we're talking about intentional birth choices, we're going to talk about why
00:04:42
Speaker
to have an intentional birth, what the maternal health care system kind of looks like today, and what choices make the biggest difference in your outcome of what your birth is like, and also how to advocate for yourself.
00:04:57
Speaker
Yes, absolutely. So this is one of those things that's kind of tricky to explain if you haven't had an experience that was not as expected in
Managing Birth Expectations
00:05:05
Speaker
birth. A lot of my friends and family are like, why would you do that? Why would you think that? Why would you research that? My first two births were kind of catastrophic. They were nothing like what I expected. A million different things were done to me that
00:05:16
Speaker
Were really really sad and we're not what I anticipated and so it got my wheels turning And so if I could share anything with any birthing woman anywhere It would be to just be aware of what's out there do a little bit of research we believe that welcoming a baby into the world should be as sacred and life-changing as when a loved one leaves this life and
00:05:37
Speaker
but hopefully much more joyous, right? But today it's more often than not just a routinely medicalized procedure and there's a lot of unnecessary stuff that goes on and is often forced on mothers and babies, maybe even without their full knowledge or consent.
00:05:53
Speaker
Yes, yes, that is so true. We have an episode about agency and that one comes into play so strongly in what we're going to be talking about today because you cannot give up. If you want to have an intentional birth, you cannot give up your agency. You have to stay engaged and you can't just
00:06:13
Speaker
How do I say it? You can't just throw all the responsibility and all the authority on the medical provider. You have to retain some of that yourself to have an intentional birth. You know, medical providers, they deliver hundreds of babies per year, but you are not going to have hundreds of babies.
Trusting Intuition in Birth Decisions
00:06:31
Speaker
You might think Bonnie and I have one. Thank goodness. Yeah, I know. But you only have a limited number of times to experience this life-changing event.
00:06:40
Speaker
the baby that you're birthing only gets to have one birth. We all only get one birth. So we wanna take these decisions. We encourage you to be intentional about it and take these decisions like really seriously. It's that important. You know, I have to say,
00:06:55
Speaker
you saying that your first two births that were not what you wanted caused you to start doing research. And I have to say that the majority of the women that I have talked to about natural birth, who have had a natural birth, have been driven to it by a negative experience with the medical industry. And that is so, so sad. What I would love to see in the future is women like natural birth or intentional birth being
00:07:23
Speaker
the thing that the majority of women get to experience and the way that most babies get to come into the world instead of it being way an outlier, not the norm. Yeah. Yeah. I love what you said about making sure you retain your agency and your power over your birth. I think a lot of us just don't really want to be involved. Obviously, you're involved with the babies coming out of you, but you kind of want to just put all the responsibility in someone else's hands. And sometimes it's because it's scary. Birth can be scary, right? It's something
00:07:51
Speaker
especially for your first baby, you've never gone through before. Sometimes it can get to a point where it's a life and death scenario. It can be quite terrifying to think, oh, it's up to me to make the right decisions. However, I will say, and I've said this before, that no one is more qualified than the mom.
00:08:07
Speaker
to make the decisions about how and where and with whom she should birth. Now you might get to a medical scenario where your knowledge stops and you really need a professional to come in and tell you what should I do about this thing usually if there's some sort of a medical problem or unforeseen event but we firmly believe that women are divinely inspired and
00:08:29
Speaker
just created in such a way that they know what's best for them and their baby.
Historical vs. Modern Birth Practices
00:08:33
Speaker
And I have had countless experiences where I have planned one particular thing for a birth or a baby and have been led a different way. And I didn't know why until after the birth and very often I saw the wisdom in that. But just don't discount your own knowledge and your own intuition when it comes to birth.
00:08:49
Speaker
Absolutely. Did you know that through most of history, babies have been born without any medical intervention? What? That's shocking.
00:09:00
Speaker
I know, but one of my favorite ancient stories is the story in Exodus, where the Egyptian Pharaoh was not happy with the Israelite people, the Jews, having more births than the Egyptian, like they're starting to be outnumbered by these Jewish interlopers here in their land. And so it was to the point where they were, of course, the Jews were servants at that point. And so they said they were told to throw all the male babies in the river.
00:09:29
Speaker
And you remember the story of those two Jewish midwives, Shipra and Puai. I have their names memorized because I love those women so much. And they said, oh, they said like the Pharaoh looked around and he saw that the Jews are still multiplying and he called the two midwives into task on this. And he said, what is going on? And they said, oh,
00:09:49
Speaker
They said the Jewish women are so lively, they have the babies before we get there. So we can't, we can't take care of these babies as they come out because these Jewish women, they just, they're doing it before we get there. They don't even need us. Sorry. And I love that story because behind the scenes is that women have been doing this for years and years and years. And women helping women at birth is like the most powerful influence you can have at your birth. We're going to talk more about advocates later, but
00:10:18
Speaker
It is so important to remember that birth is a natural, natural process of life. And most babies, I'm not going to say are born, but can be born with little to no medical intervention.
00:10:34
Speaker
Yes, our healthcare system, and let me just preface this by saying I'm not a healthcare hater. I actually really like medicine, and I was going to be a PA at one point in life. But our healthcare system, specifically maternal healthcare, has some bugs in it right now. Now, we've come a long way from obstetrics practices like 100 years ago, right? Science keeps
00:10:55
Speaker
progressing and we've made a lot of awesome progress in medicine. But we also have a long way to go, especially in the US. The research that I've read shows that countries where the midwifery type practice is the leading practice
00:11:09
Speaker
have lower maternal and infant mortality rates. So here we are in the US thinking that we're like the cream of the crop and have all this great science and technology. And yet there are countries, quite a few of them, whose babies and mothers are dying at a smaller rate because they are not intervening in birth as often as we are. And that's shocking and really disturbing in my mind.
The Impact of Medical Interventions
00:11:30
Speaker
But we keep insisting that going to the hospital with an OB is the safest way to give birth. And I would counter that it's not always.
00:11:38
Speaker
Yes, yes, that is so true. One thing my husband has said is he watched me go through pregnancy and birth is that this is why men should never be doctors, obstetricians to deliver babies because he watches me do it. And he's like, as a man, I think it's impossible for you to birth what you just birthed. To a man, that can't happen. So he said men should never be baby doctors because they think it's impossible.
00:12:07
Speaker
He said, no wonder they're intervening all the time because they don't think, like physically their body couldn't do it. So they think a woman can't do it either. Or, you know, they, they don't, not that they don't think a woman can do it, but they don't understand. They don't have the capability. It is hard to believe every time I do it. I'm like, what just happened? Did that just happen?
00:12:24
Speaker
I know. And I think when the care is, like by midwives as well, it's not just, oh, suddenly we're at the birth and the maternal and infant mortality rates are lower. That starts all the way back at the beginning in the care that a woman or a midwife gives to another woman. So very, very long history there. So, you know, in the US especially, Syrian rates have been rising steadily for years and years and years.
00:12:53
Speaker
Many experts say this could be because of unnecessary medical interventions, not because suddenly moms can't give birth to their babies. We haven't suddenly had some change to a woman's body wear now. In my opinion, my non-expert opinion, it's driven by our insurance system in the US is one thing that's driving it because
00:13:16
Speaker
in countries that don't have the money to pay for a caesarean, which is more expensive than a vaginal birth. There are less caesareans, especially the scheduled caesareans. Oh, this day will work out better for me. That kind of thing just doesn't exist because the money isn't there to afford it. And then, of course, everything else that we're saying about the care of a midwife, the care of a woman, the care of a mother choosing an intentional birth, all that definitely leads in other countries to less caesareans.
00:13:46
Speaker
Yeah, and we will obviously acknowledge that in an emergency scenario, a cesarean can be lifesaving for both the mother and the baby, but it most certainly does not need to be happening at the 40 to 60% rate we're seeing in some states. It is alarming, very alarming how often to the tune of sometimes half of all the babies being born are being cut
00:14:07
Speaker
out of their mothers, that doesn't make a lot of sense to me, right? So some of these interventions that we've talked about that are not strictly necessary can be the start of a slippery slope. So we're going to include a lot of resources in the show notes to get you started if this is something that piques your curiosity.
Informed Birth Choices: Research and Providers
00:14:22
Speaker
But be aware of what some experts call a cascade of interventions. So what that means is where a medical professional performs some sort of intervention on yours or the baby's behalf,
00:14:32
Speaker
and it leads to another one, which leads to another, which leads to another, and can often end in a catastrophic birth. So an intervention is just any procedure or practice that intervenes in an otherwise natural birth. Right, right. A really good example of this, because it's a very common one, is to break the mother's water. Well, after you break the water, medical professionals believe you have a certain amount of time that the baby is still safe in the womb before it needs to come out. And so then if the mother is not progressing after the water is
00:15:02
Speaker
broken. They feel like they have, you know, they're up against the clock now. And so it needs to happen in a certain amount of time. And so that is like the first intervention leading to another. And then you get an induction and then the induction doesn't work. And then there's a C-section, that sort of a thing. Yep. Right. Yeah. Some of, some of these that are not strict.
00:15:20
Speaker
strictly necessary. They can be, you know, the slippery slope. It's like not only breaking the water, but like fetal monitoring, epidurals, cervical checks, laboring in bed. Oh my goodness. We should do a whole episode about how walking in labor helps. Don't lay down. It's the worst. No, inductions, membrane sweeps, you know, all those things. They're all just starting
00:15:43
Speaker
What a woman's body actually knows how to do best and so the one because you're on a clock Starts the next one and the next one and so on and and really it's not If you look at it in the big picture all of these interventions Serve the medical provider better than they do the mom or the baby and that's why many of them have started
00:16:06
Speaker
Yeah, correct. So this is going to lead us into choices. So one thing that I like to ask or tell other mothers to ask is, if this wouldn't happen normally, does it need to happen at all? Or what is the risk of waiting? Let's say they want to induce you and you could just say, what if we wait? What happens if we wait? And you can then be informed enough to make that choice.
00:16:27
Speaker
So hands down, the number one choice that will have the largest effect on how your birth plays out is whether or not you are informed. And that's a lot of pressure, but listening to this podcast is a great first step. Go and research as much as possible. Read some of the articles and books that we are including in the show notes. There's a couple of great podcasts we'll include links to as well. Just do your research. Yes, absolutely.
Choosing the Right Birth Setting
00:16:50
Speaker
While your medical provider may have more experience, will have more experience at birth than you,
00:16:57
Speaker
nobody has more experience with your body than you and your body knows what to do. Okay, so the second most important choice is your choice of your provider. Who is it that will be caring for you? And then this goes hand in hand with where your location. So if you choose a midwife at home, that will almost always allow you to have the most natural
00:17:21
Speaker
intervention free birth. So then, like the next step, the second choice would be a midwife at a birth center, or perhaps a hospital has a wing that is the, you know, the birth center wing, or maybe you can find a naturally minded provider who's in a hospital, or maybe there's an entire hospital that leans more toward natural, natural care.
00:17:45
Speaker
Yeah, you'll want to do some research and not just ask providers, but ask mothers. Like, where did you give birth? Were you interested in a more natural birth? Was this done to you? Was this asked, right? How did you feel at the end? Did you feel like procedures were done to you without a lot of information and consent, or did you feel like you were kind of in control?
00:18:02
Speaker
I will share just a quick experience of my own after my first baby was a cesarean an emergency cesarean and then I had two vaginal births and then I found myself pregnant with twins and Any number of OBs I could have walked into and said schedule me a c-section today and they all would have said yes because twins, right? That's what we do. We just cut them out, especially with a history of a c-section
00:18:22
Speaker
I did not want another C-section. I knew there were more babies to come to us. I did not want to start down that road of C-section after C-section. And so I went back to the practice that had delivered my second baby back to the hospital because I felt a little bit more comfortable being in a hospital with twins. And I talked to one of their new providers and she was a woman and she had had twins herself. And when I explained the scenario, she looked at me and said, I don't trust those babies to do what they're supposed to do.
00:18:49
Speaker
I just said goodbye and walked out. I just, I knew right from the get go that she was not the provider for me. Now, had I not done the research I had done, I could have just been heartbroken and thought, well, I guess we're just going to do a repeat sexy section. But I knew better. I knew that my body had done a vaginal birth before. I knew that it could do it again. And I was going to give my babies every chance possible to come out the way God intended. And if there was an emergency, I wanted to be there.
00:19:14
Speaker
where I felt confident that I could be taken care of if a baby got stuck or something. But point being, follow your intuition, ask around. There are lots of different options. Find someone that fits with the plan that you have for yourself. So OBs can be a great choice, but make sure you do your research. Like I said, ask about their cesarean rate and not just theirs, but the hospital's cesarean rate.
00:19:37
Speaker
ask if they will allow you to labor in water, if an IV is required, ask about delayed cord clamping, if they'll let you hold your baby right away, et cetera. Again, ask other moms if all of this sounds like mumbo jumbo or you weren't really paying attention the first couple of births you had, ask other moms what they looked for.
00:19:53
Speaker
You can ask them, like I said, those who have had babies at specific birth centers or hospitals and ask what they would do differently. And finally, be aware that your OB and his practice might have a specific way of doing things, but if the hospital has stricter rules, then you have to follow those. So like once I had a doctor tell me, oh yeah, for sure, I'll let you labor in water. And then I got to the hospital and they were like, we don't do that.
00:20:15
Speaker
I'm thinking, what the heck? I just got bait and switched here. So there's two sets of regulations that you have to be willing to follow. Yes.
Advocacy in Hospitals: Respecting Birth Plans
00:20:25
Speaker
Yes. I have to share the story of a friend who I was a doula at her birth. And she did her research, and she found the most natural OB in the area. And she had done all her research, and she thought she had
00:20:40
Speaker
she was getting the best care possible. And perhaps she was for a hospital experience locally. But it was my first, it was the first birth that I had been at at a hospital. And I'd had, I was on, I don't know, maybe six or seven at that point. And I was absolutely shocked at the number of interventions and the number of things that happened
00:21:00
Speaker
at that birth that were considered a natural birth and like you know okay just pull one example out here they said oh yes we always take the baby and lay it on the mother after because that's so important and we've read the studies you know after it's born the first thing it does is it goes on the mother's stomach
00:21:17
Speaker
Well, I watched them take that baby and touch it on the mother's stomach for half of a second and then whisk it off to the nursery. And I was like, actually, I don't think that's what the research meant. A quick tap and off you go. Oh my. Yeah. So anyway, just like even if you're scared to have a natural birth or with a midwife or a home birth, talk to some moms who have. Just do it. It's part of your research.
00:21:45
Speaker
and go listen to our other birth episodes because we'll tell you. Okay, the last thing that we want to talk to you about is advocating
Support Systems: Partners and Doulas
00:21:53
Speaker
for yourself. This goes hand in hand with agency. You will need help with this. So, yes, you can make all your plans and have all your ideas and everything
00:22:03
Speaker
But when you are in labor, you may not be the best advocate for yourself. So going into labor, making all the choices, that is awesome. But you need someone also who has the same views as you. This is actually going back to my friend. This is why she had me come in, because she knew how naturally minded I was, and then that I'd never had a hospital birth, only natural home births. And so she wanted me there helping and advocating for her. Because when you're in the labor situation, it's difficult.
00:22:33
Speaker
It requires intense amounts of concentration. And so, you know, they would do things to her that she wouldn't even notice. And she specifically had said beforehand, I don't want that. And they would just do it because she was so in the zone that she couldn't even say, hey, remember, we talked about not doing this. You know, if your OB suggests something you're not comfortable with and you're in the middle of a contraction, you might just be like, yes, get out of here.
00:22:58
Speaker
You know, yes, stop talking. And then the thing happens that you had previously talked about being a no before. You're not the same when you're in labor as you were planning and going into it.
00:23:12
Speaker
Yes, I remember with my first baby, I know now as an experienced mom that I was in transition when they said it was time to have the C-section. And they came to me and said, we know this isn't what you wanted and blah, blah, blah. I was just like, stop talking and get this baby out of me. I signed that paper so fast, even though a C-section was the last thing I wanted. It was a very desperate moment for me, you know? And had I had a little bit more experience and a little bit more advocacy for me, someone to help me, that might not have happened.
00:23:39
Speaker
So I would say that the best person to advocate for your choices besides yourself, you know, you need a helper, is your husband. Make sure you talk lots with him about your choices. Make sure you do research with him so he understands because at first my husband was like, why do you want to do that? That sounds weird. That's weird. You know, I've never heard of that. But when he understands the research and has done it alongside with you, he'll be your best partner.
00:23:59
Speaker
However, you'll know your husband's personality too. Mine is not one that is very in your face. And if a doctor tells him one thing, he might not stand his ground because he's a very peaceful minded man and he does not like confrontation. So you might also consider hiring a doula, especially one who's familiar with the hospital or the birth center and that has a personality who is willing to intervene on your behalf. I had a doula once just like that and she was awesome. And she was willing to say and do whatever it took to get me the birth that I wanted.
00:24:28
Speaker
Yeah, you know, even if you've chosen a natural birth at home with a midwife, you might do what we did on our first birth. And we had a very gentle, sweet midwife that wasn't.
00:24:39
Speaker
going to be the advocate that we wanted should we have to transfer. On our first birth, we had no idea what it would be like to a hospital. And so we looked around and found another midwife that we knew if we had to transfer because it was our first birth and we'd never done it before and we didn't know anything. If we had to transfer, this lady was going to not let anybody do anything we didn't want. And we wanted her there. That was one of the reasons we switched to her was because
00:25:06
Speaker
We wanted somebody so it doesn't just because you've chosen them and they've taken your measurements and all that doesn't mean you have to continue with them to the birth. Retain your agency. You're still the one giving birth. It's not that we think that OBs and other medical personnel don't have your best interest at heart.
OB Challenges with Birth Plans
00:25:24
Speaker
It's just that it's not their body.
00:25:27
Speaker
And they do many bursts every day. It's their job, but it's your body and it's your baby. And, you know, when it's your job and you do it every day and you get familiar with it, it's like this. Once I was a barista in a coffee shop and the first day I walked in and the smells were so heavenly, right? You walk into the coffee shop, you know what it smells like. So I was thinking, oh, I'm going to love this every day. I get to smell this luscious coffee smell.
00:25:56
Speaker
Guess what happened about two weeks in? Can't smell it anymore. You're used to the smell and you can't smell the coffee smell anymore. And people would walk in and they would say, doesn't it smell heavenly? And the baristas would go, does it? Yeah, I guess I can smell that. So the routine becomes not special anymore. It's just their job. They, it's their job to get you in and out quickly with no unforeseen issues. And they put you on a clock and
00:26:26
Speaker
there's charts and things are tracked and they have medical malpractice insurance and they're looking out for their own interests first. But that's not always how babies come. Babies are made to come and will come in their own time. And that is why it's so important for you to retain the agency and the intentionality of making the birth
00:26:52
Speaker
the way you want it. You have to be the advocate for you. I know a lot of wonderful medical professionals and had some really great OBs over the years, but their hands are tied in a lot of ways too. I had one OB in particular who was just wonderful and said, yes, I see why you want things the way that you're asking, and I would love to help you with that.
00:27:13
Speaker
The hospital won't let me do this. My practice partner won't let me do this. My malpractice insurance won't let me do this. So these are your options." And I just thought that was so sad. He himself was acknowledging that my choices were going to probably be the best option, but there was only so much he could do.
00:27:30
Speaker
And I found that really incredibly
Trusting Intuition and Research
00:27:32
Speaker
sad. And so just be aware. And if you do your research and you look and you talk to people and you decide that this OB in this hospital at this time is the best choice for you, then do that. Because there are going to be some instances. My husband was talking to a colleague of his whose wife had also had many, many babies, and many of them were natural. And on their last baby, she just looked at him and said, we're scheduling a C-section for this one. And he said, why? She said, I don't know, but we have to do that.
00:27:59
Speaker
And so they did, and the baby ended up having major complications. And had they been anywhere but the hospital, the baby would have had some seriously negative outcome. So you are the expert, you are. And get in tune with God, get in tune with your mom's intuition, and you will make the best decision for your baby. Just be informed and do as much research as you can.
00:28:20
Speaker
Yes, those are such good thoughts. I believe that we were created. It's like our main purpose in life. And I do not mean that in a demeaning way. I do not see it as a derogatory thing at all. I see it as we have the privilege and the blessing to continue life into the next generation. And you know, it's our honor. And so just as we try to do, like we try to serve God with intentionality, we try to be the best parents we can.
00:28:50
Speaker
Let's try to bring life in the best way that we can too. One other thing I wanted to say is surround yourself with other women who have been intentional about their births and had a successful birth according
00:29:09
Speaker
to not what happened or didn't happen at the birth, but that it was successful the way they planned it. Surround yourself with women like that.
Building a Supportive Birth Community
00:29:17
Speaker
If you don't know anybody locally, start following accounts like that on Instagram. In our other birth episodes, we have recommended quite a few. Surround yourself with women who have been intentional about their births, who have had natural births. If there's a certain kind of birth that you want, a certain kind of experience you're looking for, find other women who have had that and do that. And because I think one,
00:29:39
Speaker
One tool that is too often used against pregnant women is fear because, you know, there is a baby involved and a helpless baby and other things have happened in the past, unfortunately. And so we just want and hope that your birth, like if you surround yourself with other women who have had success, you too can have success.
00:30:03
Speaker
Yes, trust yourself. Don't let anybody else shame you with your decisions. I've had well-intentioned friends and family members make comments that were very hurtful, that made it seem like they thought I was putting my baby's life at risk on purpose when I had done so much more research than they had ever done, and I knew what was going to be the best for me and my family. So have confidence in yourself. You can do this. Your baby's coming to you for a reason, and best of luck. Take care of this week, friends. I'm Bonnie. And I'm Audrey, and we're outnumbered.
00:30:33
Speaker
Thanks for listening friends. Click the link in the show notes to subscribe to our email and never miss another episode. Show us some love by leaving a review on iTunes or sharing the podcast with a friend. Thanks for all your support. We'll talk to you next week.
00:31:01
Speaker
Where is my brain? Okay.