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5 Self-Recognition Exercises That You'll Actually Want To Do
26 Plays4 months ago
You’re great at celebrating others — but what about celebrating you? In today's solo episode, I’ll walk you through 5 self-recognition exercises to help you boost your confidence, build self-worth, and speak about yourself with genuine kindness. These simple practices will help you see yourself the way others already do — empathetic, capable, and full of light. A gentle guide to feeling grounded, confident, and connected to who you truly are.
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Transcript
Introduction and Support Request
00:00:00
Speaker
Hello and welcome back to Connectors with Eva. I hope you've had a lovely week and if you've been enjoying what I've been doing so far, please follow or subscribe or review. know this will be extremely helpful.
Perception of Achievements
00:00:12
Speaker
Today is an exercise. An exercise that's beneficial to all. We all know how to see greatness in others, their gloss, their struggles, their strengths.
00:00:23
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All of that, when it comes to other people and not ourselves, becomes a beautiful, finished package. Other people had struggles or trauma, this long, complex journey, and now they're in this incredible place that they've worked really hard for and give others so much grace when it comes to that.
Topic Introduction: Self-Perception
00:00:43
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But When it comes to ourselves, it's almost like we put ourselves down and don't give ourselves enough credit for what we've accomplished.
00:00:51
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Today, we'll explore why this is so and share five everyday exercises to shift that. Because a healthy way to look at ourselves is the first step to a greater life.
00:01:05
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So why do we not allow ourselves to see in grace?
Imposter Syndrome and Perfectionism
00:01:09
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There is perfectionism in imposter phenomenon. Many high achievers feel their success comes from luck, hard work and not their own skill.
00:01:20
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They fear being found out. That's the imposter phenomenon. Have you ever started something where you've thought it for a very long time and you finally took the leap of faith and you started it and instead of being really proud of yourself, you thought, well, I'm going to fail at some point because I'm not an expert. All these other people know what they're doing and I don't.
00:01:44
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And you almost start this new thing with a sense of fear, extreme anxiety, feeling out of place. And that feeling can be suffocating.
00:01:56
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Perfectionism adds to this. People with high perfectionistic concerns have doubts about the quality of their performance. Fear of mistakes set extremely high standards for themselves, not others, only for themselves.
Growth Journey and Admiration
00:02:12
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That makes them less likely to hype themselves up because they see any flaw as disqualifying. When I started my podcast, I had a microphone, I didn't have a studio,
00:02:25
Speaker
you could say I don't have the right equipment. And yet, it was one of the things I actually started where i gave myself enough grace and I was like, I'm doing it and that's enough.
00:02:37
Speaker
And I love going on social media and sometimes reading about other people's journey with podcasting, how they started it in a closet so that they couldn't have background noise.
00:02:50
Speaker
And maybe they became quite successful a few years after. Sometimes if we start things, we want them to be big, perfect. We want them to be a level well where nobody else has had them because everyone who so started doing something has grown and into skill level they currently have that we admire them for.
00:03:13
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But we don't allow ourselves that journey, that progress, It's almost like the growth we admire in others is incomprehensible in ourselves.
00:03:24
Speaker
So there is this mismatch between achievement and self-belief.
Self-Compassion and Mental Health
00:03:28
Speaker
In STEM education research, women often earn high grades but report lower self-efficacy.
00:03:36
Speaker
They don't feel as capable. So you might have external evidence, praise, but internal belief doesn't catch up. On average, people are more compassionate towards others than towards themselves.
00:03:50
Speaker
Self-compassion correlates with better mental health. For different reasons, many people hold negative beliefs about being kind to oneself. seeing it as a self-indulgence that blocks self-giving of grace.
00:04:05
Speaker
There are certain examples I can think of myself when it comes to negative connotation of self-giving or self-compassion, and that's perhaps you're lazy, so you're just allowing yourself this moment of, quote, grace, where you should actually go out and do better.
00:04:26
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you know This whole thing where if you're not doing something how others perceive you should be doing it or how you perceive you should be doing it, that it's not to a satisfactory level. So there's no grace there to give.
00:04:41
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And many, many other examples as well. But there is a lot of overthinking there as well and perception and how others see us, how see ourselves. how we see ourselves And that's all detrimental to our growth and actually getting to a place where we're comfortable doing things, being on a journey, not craving constant results.
00:05:07
Speaker
So let's talk about the important thing that I said at the beginning. Five
Improving Self-Perception: Exercises
00:05:14
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exercises. That's five everyday exercises. Won't take much time.
00:05:19
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Would really benefit how we see ourselves in general. How kind we are to ourselves and how much we hype ourselves up. Okay, so exercise one. You have this pen and paper next to you or the notes on your phone.
00:05:34
Speaker
You can write it down. Reflective listening to compliments. Keep a compliment log. When someone says something admiring or encouraging, write it down.
00:05:46
Speaker
Or if it's on social media or on the phone, even better screenshot it. If it's an email, forward it to yourself. Print it out.
00:05:58
Speaker
Create a folder. Once a day, read those compliments back to yourself and work on the reaction to reading or hearing those compliments.
00:06:09
Speaker
Is your reaction, oh no, no, no, it's too much? Or does it feel like something that is truthful? Is the information you're hearing something that you agree with?
00:06:20
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Or can you get to a place where you you agree with it? Exercise 2. Struggle, story, reframe. Pick struggle you've had.
00:06:32
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Write it out. You can do this with multiple experiences you've had or patterns. Then reframe it in admiration mode. Because of this, I am stronger, more compassionate, more resilient.
00:06:50
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more empathetic because of this experience, because of this thing. i am the person I am today. If it's something that's a big contrast, it wouldn't work because you need to have a level of belief when you're writing this down.
00:07:07
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Exercise 3. Adjective swap. From feedback you've received, Maybe you've been told you're helpful, creative, happy, etc.
00:07:21
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Pick one adjective. Every morning this week, say, I am this adjective. I am helpful. I am kind.
00:07:33
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I make people happy. Oh, well, you need to turn this into an adjective. I am happy. am friendly. I am funny. And do a small act that embodies this adjective.
00:07:48
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If it's kind, do something kind. If it's friendly, message a friend and check up with them. Exercise 4. Voice not hype.
00:07:59
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Record yourself talking about your own achievements. Be were small. How others see you. Use hype language. She showed up.
00:08:11
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He didn't give up, etc. Play it when you need a confidence boost. And a little sad note here. Sometimes when you have a problem, try talking, recording a voice note and seeing what comes up.
00:08:27
Speaker
Because but sometimes when you verbalize things, you get clarity and things become more helpful. And this was a very good tip I got from someone I spoke to on the podcast.
00:08:38
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Exercise 5. Mirror affirmation with action. When you see yourself in the mirror, pick one quality you admire in yourself.
00:08:50
Speaker
Say it out loud, then on that day, act in alignment with it. Could be kindness, courage, creativity. But to check up on yourself that day and make sure you're acting in alignment with that quality.
Impact of Self-Perception and Final Encouragement
00:09:08
Speaker
Research shows that self-compassion and believing in your own capabilities reduces anxiety, depression and buffer against low self-esteem.
00:09:19
Speaker
Realistically speaking, what we tell ourselves, what we believe about ourselves, is how we see ourselves. So that's where our self-esteem comes from. It could be, yes, maybe our family or we were growing up, we didn't hear good words about ourselves. We need to create a new narrative.
00:09:40
Speaker
And that's based off what tell ourselves and what do we think about ourselves. Your internal beliefs about whether you deserve to praise yourself and perfectionism are real obstacles.
00:09:54
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You're not alone. So which one of these exercises feels most doable? And you can adjust things. Or sometimes writing is more helpful for certain people than speaking.
00:10:10
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So adjust if needed. What label or adjective do others often use for you, but you hesitate to use for yourself? Pick one exercise and do it each day for a week.
00:10:24
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Write down the shift that's happening over that week. You deserve the same hype, the same grace, the same celebration that you give to others.
00:10:35
Speaker
I think about this quite a lot when it comes to how I think about people in my life or people I admire. There is a level of awe when it comes to their achievements and what they've accomplished.
00:10:47
Speaker
So why is that awe sometimes so distant? For our own self, it's possible to change. And it starts with small steps. But if done daily, they can have massive impact growth and progress.
00:11:04
Speaker
Thank you. Until next time.