Become a Creator today!Start creating today - Share your story with the world!
Start for free
00:00:00
00:00:01
Christmas Trespassing
31 Plays3 days ago
The crew travel to Wintersburgh once again to do some Christmas shopping and meet their old pal Roger.
Turns out Santa was too busy to deliver presents to this small town. Oh well.
Make sure to join the Discord to enter the Plushie Givaway! Winners will be picked and announced January 2nd 2026.
Patreon - patreon.com/MysteryDungeonPTT
Discord - https://discord.gg/A7NCWyPkSd
New! Our custom made subreddit for all things pmdtabletop!
https://www.reddit.com/r/PMDTabletop/
Dakota as the PM, DM, GM
Evelyn as Hikaru the Pikachu
Eli as Bruce the Cyndaquil
Jake as Walter the Riolu
Recommended
Transcript
Introduction and Gingerbread Debate
00:00:11
Speaker
Hello everyone and welcome to A Path Through Time. My name is Dakota, your PM, your DM, your GM. And sitting to my left is somebody who loves gingerbread. Mmm, delicious!
00:00:25
Speaker
It's me, Evelyn. And sitting to my left is... someone who hates gingerbread. Yeah, there's just too much ginger in gingerbread.
Cookie Preferences and Childhood Memories
00:00:40
Speaker
don't know, it it always seemed a little too much for Christmas cookies. I'm Eli and sitting across from me is someone who thinks that peanut butter cookies are the only real Christmas cookies.
00:00:59
Speaker
Okay, now you put me in a dangerous situation here.
00:01:04
Speaker
Okay. That was the plan. can I can't lie. I've never liked peanut butter cookies. I'm a holy truck and chip fan. i No way. How can you not like peanut butter cookies? Okay, so this is going to be the whole podcast. I like peanut butter, but not peanut butter cookies.
00:01:21
Speaker
Okay, so what's in peanut butter cookies that you don't like? Because if you like peanut butter, then what's up with peanut cookies? don't All I know is I tasted it one time when I was like seven, didn't care for it, and never tasted it again. though Sounds like you need to try it again. Wow. Yeah, sounds like you haven't had a good peanut butter cookie.
00:01:40
Speaker
Yeah. because To be fair, it was my sister's first attempt at making a cookie, so maybe. but Okay, but I do got...
Simple Peanut Butter Cookie Recipe
00:01:48
Speaker
Okay, i am I am going to put a recipe for three ingredient peanut butter cookies in the group chat after the recording. Wait, hold on a second. Whoa, whoa, whoa, hold up. Three ingredient peanut butter cookies?
00:02:03
Speaker
Uh-huh. How the fuck do you do that? Is it peanut butter, like baking like cake mix, and sugar? Nope. That would be more of than three ingredients.
00:02:14
Speaker
What? I don't get it, because you need more than like you need like flour, eggs, sugar, water. You don't need the flour, you don't need the water. Just peanut butter, sugar, and egg.
00:02:27
Speaker
It's all you need. Really? i literally just made cookies earlier today with some of the family, so we definitely used more than three ingredients. Well, you can use more, but you don't have to. i made that i made the three ingredient peanut butter cookies yesterday for a Christmas caroling after party, and they went over very well.
00:02:51
Speaker
Okay, I actually do want to see that, because I actually might make that. I'm genuinely clear curious to see how that would turn out.
00:03:00
Speaker
Okay, speaking of, I'm going to go grab some of the leftovers of those cookies right now to have one. Okay, while we wait for them, I did have a question for you guys. Speaking of cookies, what are your guys' favorite Christmas cookies?
00:03:17
Speaker
I like the internet kind. One at a time.
00:03:24
Speaker
I like the internet kind. Internet cookies? Wow, so tasty. Delicious. I love rejecting them. What about you, Chip? Chocolate of chip. Chocolate chip cookies? They're so basic.
00:03:37
Speaker
God, you're gonna hate me, but I love peanut butter cookies. Ugh. How is that? o It's peanut butter. It's going to be the knife and spoon conversation again.
00:03:49
Speaker
That's what I was trying to say earlier. I don't think there's anyone on this planet who hates peanut butter cookies. Eli, we're talking about favorite cookies. What's your favorite cookie?
00:04:02
Speaker
My favorite cookie, at least for like Christmas cookies, is actually Jell-O cookies. Okay, you got all the cookie talk today. What the hell is a jello cookie?
00:04:20
Speaker
um So basically, I was eating my cookie. but So basically, it's just generic sugar cookie, like cutout cookie recipe with a pack of jello powder mixed into it.
00:04:38
Speaker
Huh, how are you discovering all of these recipes? You got peanut butter cookies, you got jello cookies. Yeah, so the jello cookie recipe, I'm pretty sure my family got out of some magazine or something before I was born. was gonna say, no one uses magazines anymore. And we've been making them ever since.
00:05:04
Speaker
Huh. And then I'm not entirely sure what the history with point behind the three ingredient peanut butter cookie is.
00:05:19
Speaker
So yeah, there we go. That's our Christmas cookie talk for the episode. Yeah, ah so, yes,
Discord Giveaway Announcement
00:05:28
Speaker
back on track. um Obviously, we don't have a recap for this episode, but I do have an announcement to make.
00:05:34
Speaker
um Over the next, what is it, two weeks? Hold on, when is January 2nd? Where's my phone? Until January 2nd, I am running a giveaway in our Discord server.
00:05:49
Speaker
um I'm going to be choosing three random members from our Discord server, and I'm going to be giving away a plushie for each of the characters, for each of the player characters. So, ah I'm going to be giving away one Pikachu, one Cydaquil, and one Rioli plush to three random of people in the Discord server. So, if you're in the Discord server, you're automatically entered.
00:06:12
Speaker
ah I'm not... a going to do anything for like, oh, could do this to get extra entries or something. No, I'm just, if you're in the Discord server, I'm going to choose random person, and if you don't respond, it'll go to the next person after another couple days. So, keep an eye out for your DMs, and I will announce that on January 2nd. So, keep an eye out for that. You hear that people trying get two DMs.
00:06:37
Speaker
Oh. and I do. i Also, if it wasn't obvious, no purchase is necessary. Yes, no purchase is necessary, and I am not going to be asking for anyone's address for shipping or anything, ah so don't worry about that.
00:06:52
Speaker
If you're uncomfortable with that I am not going to be asking for address or anything. It will be sent to a local post office or pickup spot near you, so... uh do not worry about that and if i didn't make it clear i meant one plush per person i'm not giving 30 plushes to each person so one person will get a picture one person will send a quill and one person will get a real so gonna be running that for the next couple weeks um when's our next episode coming out uh let's say i think i might have one more announcement for this but i don't remember if you're in the discord server already uh then uh you're gonna see announcements over for like next week or two so what is today today is the
00:07:35
Speaker
okay uh no we will not have an episode out by the time the giveaway is over so uh go join the discord if you want to be entered that's all i ask and if you're in the discord then then yep that's all you need to do so with that being said though are you guys ready to crack on with the christmas we need a random move Um, let us present on in.
00:08:06
Speaker
Present! Is present a- Is that Delibird?
00:08:11
Speaker
Is that Delibird's signature move? Yes. Okay, is there move say and okay as I gonna say, I've never actually heard of that move before, but the only place I can see it being used is Delibird's. Okay, yeah so.
00:08:25
Speaker
Let us present on in. Because that makes any sense. Oh yeah, totally.
00:08:33
Speaker
So, you guys happen to find yourselves traveling across a snowy landscape as Miss Flameback has given you guys a sack of money to go Christmas shopping in the town of Winterberg.
00:08:48
Speaker
Once again.
00:08:52
Speaker
So, we find ourselves back in Wintersburg once again. As you guys come slowly up towards the town through the snowy plains, you come across once again the sign that says, Welcome to Wintersburg.
00:09:05
Speaker
And you see a familiar sight with the porch light on. You see the house. Is it the church or our
Return to Wintersburg and Welcomed by Roger
00:09:13
Speaker
house? i think it's the church. Yeah, it was the church where Roger the Lucario is staying.
00:09:22
Speaker
And you also see a large sack sitting out on the front porch for some reason.
00:09:30
Speaker
Okay.
00:09:33
Speaker
I wonder if it has balls in it.
00:09:37
Speaker
Evelyn. hey that is yeah That is the the most direct innuendo I think we've had on that show. ask Yeah, Chump.
00:09:50
Speaker
So, you look at the sack and it is distinctly not ball-shaped, so there are no balls in this as far as you can tell. Nice sack.
00:10:04
Speaker
So, across from the church you see the general shop and you see it all of the houses in the area lit up with Christmas decorations and Christmas joy.
00:10:15
Speaker
And opening the door of the church you see Roger the Lucario sticking his head out. a Hey, Roger, long time no see!
00:10:29
Speaker
Oh, if it isn't you guys again! Welcome in, welcome in, welcome back to Wintersburg! Yeah! Yeah, um, we're glad to be back. Where were we this whole time anyway?
00:10:46
Speaker
What do you mean, where were we?
00:10:49
Speaker
I mean... You're Mount Crumpet, you fools! I mean, did time pass? Since the last episode or something? Uh, oh, uh, no, this is a non-canon standalone episode, so.
00:11:03
Speaker
Since the last Christmas, at like... Well, so it's been a year since the last Christmas episode, right? Listen, if we were going to stick with the Christmas episode, you'd all be dead. let's let's say Let's say this is the year after the Ark 1 Christmas episode.
00:11:17
Speaker
h And we're all back alive, i guess. yeah What? You guys never died. i don't know what you guys are talking about. Yeah. So...
00:11:28
Speaker
Yeah, so I'm gonna say this is the year after the Ark One episode. Some sort of time shenanigans going on here where we didn't die now. Hey, you guys haven't solved the the mystery of all the rifts and stuff, so who knows.
00:11:41
Speaker
Maybe time did go back, you guys came alive, who knows. Power of the Legendaries, you know. You know how it goes.
00:11:50
Speaker
So, Roger's standing on his porch. He's like, come on, come on in,
Mission: Deliver Presents for Mr. Claus
00:11:53
Speaker
guys. Come on, get out of the cold. I haven't seen you guys in a long time, come in he's just gesturing you inside.
00:12:05
Speaker
walk in, guess? As you guys enter, you see all of the dusty old pews sitting in the lane of row. And it's a small but modest church.
00:12:17
Speaker
um And he sits down in one of the pews and he's like, Wow, wow, what breaks you guys into? Oh, Wintersburg!
00:12:28
Speaker
Well, we were just vacationing.
00:12:35
Speaker
I I, uh... I got an advance from this kid here's record label, and I just wanted to spend it all on vacations, I guess.
00:12:49
Speaker
i'm i'm I'm very good with money. Who is this Miss Kid you talk about? Um... Bruce. You're, uh...
00:13:03
Speaker
Uh, it's... It's Flameback Records, a division of Flameback Enterprises. Oh. I'm signed. were you Remember Were you actually talking about Flameback Re... What are you? Okay.
00:13:14
Speaker
I didn't know you were in the music business. Well, congratulations. I'm glad you have a while off. Here to do some Christmas shopping?
00:13:26
Speaker
There we are. Well, that is very interesting for a lot of folks here are also here for Christmas shopping. But, uh, well, you see, I've got my own Christmas problems, if you'd like to hear them.
00:13:46
Speaker
Not really. Bye, bye.
00:13:50
Speaker
But we're always happy to help with Christmas problems. whoa Well, I'm sure you've seen the big sack sitting outside. Yes. Well, it is really and heavy. It's very nice sack. You should be proud.
00:14:06
Speaker
thank you. I've gotten many compliments throughout my college years. But with that being said, attached to the sack was this note. And he pulls out a piece of paper and he hands it to ah Eli.
00:14:21
Speaker
Bruce.
00:14:26
Speaker
Hands it to Bruce. Yep. No, no, no. He reaches through the fourth wall is like, Eli, take this. Okay. Hands it to Bruce. I'll take this note here then.
00:14:39
Speaker
Okay, so this is Eli reading it. Yeah. So your year note says, Dear Roger, I'm running very late this year and don't have time to give presents to all the children this year. So I'm recruiting the help of my closest friends.
00:14:53
Speaker
Would you be a good lad and deliver these presents to all the children this year? Signed, Mr. Claus. P.S. In case anyone sees you, here's some costumes. As you look up from the note, Roger looks back at you and he's like,
00:15:09
Speaker
My old friend, Mr. Claus needs some help, but I'm too old and rickety to... o Mr. Claus, he's... Is Santa older than you?
00:15:23
Speaker
Oh, Mr. Claus is immortal. He seems to forget that people age sometimes. We were friends when I was younger and I no longer have my youth, so it is much harder for me to fulfill his needs. yeah So how old is this Mr. Claus?
00:15:44
Speaker
Oh, he must be thousands of years old, fulfilling the wishes of Christmas for many, many years. hu For playing Christmas, I would've got coal. What about coal? i had plenty of coal.
00:16:01
Speaker
what Why do you have coal? rather for Christmas instead of presents. Well, you must have been a very naughty boy. What did you do? i don't know. um Be the target of abuse?
00:16:18
Speaker
That... What? That doesn't... You know what? Never mind. Would you guys be willing to help me fulfill some Christmas deliveries? Mmm, sure.
00:16:33
Speaker
There will be a reward in it for you, i swear. I just can't do this myself. It's been a long time since me and Mr. Claus were friends back in college.
00:16:46
Speaker
heck He says with a funny smirk. and In college?
00:16:54
Speaker
Wait, so how long a ago did this Mr. Claus go to college? Oh, mr Mr. Claus went for to college for oh aerospace engineering. You see, he built his own sleighs and everything.
00:17:13
Speaker
Are you Krampus? What? No. What? No? no Why would you say that? Oh, no. yeah You just know Santa. you're You went to college with him. I'm just i'm just guessing.
00:17:26
Speaker
I'm pretty sure Krampus is Santa's brother, but okay. Hey, you you never know. Also, I'm pretty sure santa is not at Lucario, so... I've never met him! Anyway... Enough about my past.
00:17:42
Speaker
Would you kindly come out to the porch with me so I can show you the deliveries?
00:17:49
Speaker
Sure. Sure thing. The sack will totally still be there. he He leads you outside and yes, the sack is still there.
00:18:00
Speaker
But um you go outside and ah he starts unwrapping the knot that's on the sack and starts pulling out four different presents.
00:18:12
Speaker
um I need you to... Can you guys give me three Pokemon? I need a large, a medium, and a small Pokemon.
00:18:23
Speaker
Ursaring. Ursaring Ursaring how tall how big is that like I'll consider that a large one Ursaring a popcorn um, what was that?
00:18:41
Speaker
Yes, I'll live ex ca drill small of
00:18:46
Speaker
Milotic? Wait, how big is Milotic? Uh, Milotic's pretty... Yeah, six meters. Okay. In length. Yeah, that's 18 feet long. Okay. I can say that one large.
00:19:02
Speaker
Lopunny? Did you say Lopunny? I did not say Lopunny. I said... i said 20 feet. Get out your head. ah Okay, Lopunitas. And for a small Pokemon.
00:19:19
Speaker
The Smolive. S-M-O-L-I-V-E. Smolive. Without an E. Without an E. Oh, right. Yeah. Okay, Smolive.
00:19:32
Speaker
Okay, gotcha. right so Okay, so he hands you a he hand you a piece of paper with three different addresses on it.
00:19:46
Speaker
And as he opens up the sack, he pulls out three different toys. um Let me just look at the list you just gave me. ah He has a punch a punching bag.
00:19:59
Speaker
um a strange parcel and a bottle of olive oil. And he hands these to each of you guys and he's like, Oh, attached here is oh the addresses that these packages will go to.
00:20:19
Speaker
You need to deliver them underneath the Christmas tree and make sure you're not spotted. However, if you are, that's what these are for.
Stealthy Present Delivery
00:20:28
Speaker
And he pulls out three perfectly sized Santa Claus costumes for you guys to wear.
00:20:36
Speaker
Okay. If you guys do get caught, try and play it off. don't Don't ruin the Christmas spirit for any of these children. Or get shot by any of their parents.
00:20:48
Speaker
What kind of Pokemon is Mr. Claus? Oh, that's a very great question, actually. Anyway, so did not make...
00:21:01
Speaker
If you guys complete these challenges, then I will have a fourth and final challenge for you guys to do. Okay.
00:21:14
Speaker
Wait, I thought you said there were four things in the sack. Yes, I gave you three of the four things. I told you there would be a fourth challenge for you if you guys complete the first three.
00:21:26
Speaker
She he says tying the sack up again.
00:21:32
Speaker
Okay.
00:21:35
Speaker
So, anyway, off with you! Woof woof!
00:21:40
Speaker
Okay. And he, like, shoos you off the off the porch.
00:21:47
Speaker
Okay, so we're all just gonna... yeah I guess, like, dress up as Mr. Claus? Dad, you can be Mrs. Claus if you want. Just cut the beard off. No worries. It's just... Nah, I wasn't...
00:22:03
Speaker
Okay. so I'm just going to call us now for anything. have you any yeah if you've seen Family Guy and if you know this the episode where Brian and Stewie are Santa Claus is, you'll get what I'm thinking is going to happen soon.
00:22:17
Speaker
I have not seen it, so. Okay, then that's for a Family Guy enjoyers. Okay. Okay, so you guys have been given the address of an Ursa Rank, a Lopunny, and a Smoliv.
00:22:29
Speaker
um However, as Roger goes inside and locks the door, you guys realize you don't know which gifts go to which patrons. That's what I was afraid of.
00:22:40
Speaker
So what are the gifts? An olive oil? You guys have olive oil, a strange parcel, and ah and a punching bag. I don't know how you guys are holding the punching bag, but it has magically shrunk down and you guys are having it.
00:22:54
Speaker
What were the Pokemons again? You guys have an Ursaring, a Lopunny, and a Smoliv. So I have a feeling the punching bag goes to the Lopunny.
00:23:10
Speaker
Wait, why? Because they're kickers. They're kickboxers, basically. Yeah. Lafony Big known for eye kickboxing. And they turn into a fighting type when they mega evolve.
00:23:23
Speaker
Yep. For some reason, I feel like it's not going to be straightforward.
00:23:29
Speaker
Like. What would the olive oil even go to? Yeah, it feels kind of a strange to be giving a small of olive oil.
00:23:41
Speaker
To a child, right? but Yeah, I mean, it's it's a child. Who asked for this?
00:23:49
Speaker
But the evolved forms of small of make olive oil naturally. You know, it occurred to me I probably should have picked baby Pokemon for these.
00:24:03
Speaker
Yeah, because they're all grownups. use Listen, they just hit puberty fast. Well, no, small abizzababy. Small abizzababy, yeah, but I don't think low plenty in Earth. You know, for what I have planned, I'm going to say that these are all adults. So, adults can have Christmas cheer, too. Alright, this is just elf.
00:24:28
Speaker
yeah I think a small one can be an adult. Even though in the note is specified that they were children, but you know, maybe Mr. Claus got it wrong this time. Huh.
00:24:39
Speaker
Okay. o but Wait, wait, wait. did a Can we go back to Roger and ask him which ones go to photo who
00:24:51
Speaker
Are you asking me? I'm asking the group. Okay. mean, we could? It sounded like he locked the door behind him, which I thought was kind of strange, but... Maybe he's got stuff to do?
00:25:07
Speaker
i don't know. You could try That's pretty unhelpful. Um... Hmm. Why don't we go and ask... i don't know.
00:25:18
Speaker
Maybe just, maybe, maybe like... Is it Christmas Eve now? ah Yes, I should have specified that it is Christmas Eve. It is Christmas Eve night, so you guys have like a few hours to complete this task.
00:25:32
Speaker
Okay. oh So we weren't going to be getting home with our Christmas shopping anyways in time for Christmas. ah That's fine, you guys have the badges. how are we gonna How are we supposed to know if we delivered them to the correct recipient?
00:25:48
Speaker
I guess we don't. As long as we don't get caught. You guys will know by the end of the episode. Okay. Hmm.
00:26:03
Speaker
Do we have... like the Do the addresses have who lives at the address? Yes. Yes. It says, it says like, so-and-so, the small... of mo So-and-so, the little bunny, etc., etc.
00:26:17
Speaker
Okay.
00:26:20
Speaker
Hmm. Maybe we can go and, like... go to their house and ask them. We can't ask them or they'll know it from us. No, no, no, no, no. Like, ask them if they, like, want something, if they wanted a particular thing for Christmas, but without, like, without giving away that we're the ones delivering them.
00:26:39
Speaker
what if we're What if we act like we're, um, we act like we're, uh, what we call it? Advocates trying to do a, um, experiment to see at what what's the most common item people will be wanting for Christmas that we're saying for a business? Yeah, I mean, you know, we're making a list, checking it twice, and we're and we found some discrepancies.
00:27:03
Speaker
that's that's That's what we gotta tell them. Hey, so Santa sent us down to double-check some things he found questionable on his list. Yeah. no We can't say that because then they'll be suspicious. We can just say we're like researchers for a toy um company.
00:27:22
Speaker
Yeah, a toy company. And we're just asking what's the most wanted gifts from everyone. I'm just imagining you guys in like black suits and black glasses like we are here anonymously to ask you some questions. You've been randomly selected by the US government.
00:27:39
Speaker
Or we could pretend to be carolers. could pretend to be carolers and just ask for their song, their thing and the song. I think we should have two people go up and like be like the surveyors and then one person can stay behind and like be like hidden but within earshot so that they can then go deliver the gift so that the gift appears under the tree while the conversation is happening.
00:28:09
Speaker
Well, we have a day before this so we don't do this now.
00:28:14
Speaker
thought it was already Christmas Eve night. It is. It's Christmas Eve night. yeah Are they even still going to be awake?
00:28:23
Speaker
That's good question.
00:28:26
Speaker
Yeah, I mean some people stay up really late. Listen, these ungrateful children should just have that get what they want without throwing fit. They gain toys for free. hey
00:28:44
Speaker
So what do you think we should do then? Just take a guess and deliver? Or try to get some more information?
00:29:01
Speaker
Tricky question, tricky, tricky questions. Oh no, we could just peep on through a window and just see what they're doing. Yeah.
00:29:13
Speaker
That work too. That would be part of getting information. Okay.
00:29:24
Speaker
Well, olive oil... I feel like there's only, i don't know, a small of olive oil. It's, it feels like it should be actually kind of straightforward.
00:29:36
Speaker
don't know. Yeah, that's what I was thinking.
Parcel Mix-Up and Delivery Challenges
00:29:41
Speaker
But. Uh huh.
00:29:45
Speaker
But, maybe not. Yeah, I'm curious about this strange parcel. Hmm. Strange parcel? The strange parcel, uh, I'll give you this.
00:29:57
Speaker
As you look closer at the strange parcel, it is, it seems to be purposefully unmarked. As if it was supposed to be, as if the contents are supposed to be anonymous.
00:30:08
Speaker
a Is there any way we can, like, see inside it without opening it? Uh, no, you guys can open it if you want, but...
00:30:20
Speaker
Do we happen to know this Ursa ring by any chance?
00:30:26
Speaker
um don't know, you haven't seen them yet okay yet. For some reason, this strange parcel rings a bell. Yeah, it feels familiar.
00:30:42
Speaker
Yeah, like not familiar, like like maybe not the parcel, but like it feels like we've been in this situation before.
00:30:53
Speaker
Okay, so you guys currently have two options. You guys can either go to one of the houses or you can go back and talk with Roger. Which one would you guys rather do? I vote to go back and talk to Roger.
00:31:06
Speaker
a Yeah, if that's an option still. Less creepy. in yep Yeah, I think if we did talk to Roger, we should.
00:31:18
Speaker
Less chance of looking like we're about to be a Christmas serial killer. Okay, okay so ah so you guys are knocking on Roger's door. Okay.
00:31:32
Speaker
Yep. okay Okay, so as you go as you knock on the door, a a little bit of time passes you hear some shuffling inside. You hear 15 deadbolts unlock, and you see Roger peek outside. He's like, who You guys deliver the presents yet?
00:31:50
Speaker
Um, no, I think, um, we're just, uh, what did you just type? Jake.
00:32:03
Speaker
You know, we're just we're just a little bit... We just wanna... You know, we're looking at your list and double-checking it. I mean, we're we just wanna make sure that we get... That we get all the pres... That we know which presents to deliver to which... Um... Persons?
00:32:22
Speaker
Um... Oh! I see. Um... let me take a yeah Let me take a look at the gifts real quick. And he picks up the strange parcel and he looks at it and it's it has a sticker on it and it just says, From Santa.
00:32:41
Speaker
Do you have the list?
00:32:45
Speaker
Yeah, I checked it twice. It just has all of the addresses on it.
00:32:50
Speaker
And no item? Like which which item goes to which address? Usually Sansa just knows which gifts go to which people. Hmm, this does seem to be an oversight.
00:33:04
Speaker
It does. Does it seem like the logical gift is the one that's correct? I don't fucking know.
00:33:15
Speaker
I'm not doing this quest. I'm too old for this. Well, you should be wise in your old age. Yeah, if you were to deliver these packages, who would you deliver each one to?
00:33:29
Speaker
I claim no liability over your decisions or mistakes you make in the future. This is all up to you.
00:33:40
Speaker
But is there such a thing as a correct gift? I mean, i think generally children... Yes, yes there is. i don't want whatever's in that box.
00:33:51
Speaker
Probably...
00:33:56
Speaker
Actually, you know what? Now that i think that, I don't know that.
00:34:02
Speaker
Anyway. go back to sleep now? Alright. Thank you for your help. Yep. Bye. and he closes the door on you guys.
00:34:14
Speaker
Oh, and he opens the door again. by the way. you Don't forget you have to specifically deliver these gifts underneath the tree in no other way.
00:34:26
Speaker
Do not be detected or anything. Alright, that's it. I'm going back to bed. Roger, Roger. Okay, I'm just going to put it on top the tree. know what would be really creepy we put it right in their bed and they wake up to it? Just kidding.
00:34:50
Speaker
How creepy would that be? That would be really creepy if we put punching bag the Lopunny's bed. Yeah, it just holds it in the arms like sleeping outside, and it's like a teddy bear.
00:35:02
Speaker
We remove the teddy bear and slub in the punching bag. okay
00:35:10
Speaker
Yeah, that seems pretty ballsy.
00:35:15
Speaker
withly y love day Okay, so chris which house are you guys going to first? The sack?
00:35:27
Speaker
What is the sack? Do I have to come up with a new company that's called- Santa sack that going to be the name of backpack company? The sack.
00:35:39
Speaker
Oh jeez. so Okay, which house are you guys going to first? it is
00:35:46
Speaker
Jake, I'm about to punt you out of this podcast, I swear to god. I'm done. Okay, okay. I say we go and we just divide and conquer.
00:36:01
Speaker
Each bring one present to one house. Since I'm probably the only one um big enough to carry a punching bag, I'll take it to the little bunny, I guess.
00:36:13
Speaker
Okay. Alright. I mean, we've... Dakota said that the items can shrink down. Well, if we're going to have to separate them, then one person... There's only one bag, and have to go three different ways.
00:36:30
Speaker
oh I'll bring the olive oil. If I can figure out. It seems like the obvious one. Yeah. Yeah, so I'll i'll bring the...
00:36:43
Speaker
the strange parcel to the Earth's Ring, then. I'm still hung up on who asked for olive oil. Go to the store! You lazy butt, they don't wanna shopping. But olive oil don't know what it in these parts. Like, olive oil freezes in cold.
00:36:58
Speaker
Does it freeze? I didn't think. Put it by the fire! rose
00:37:04
Speaker
But, like, olive oil is expensive these days. Olive oil is a good gift to ask for for Christmas because then you're getting it for free. Where do you get olive oil from in this?
00:37:17
Speaker
Does it from certain regions about that? That a question you do not want to be answered. Listen, we don't ask about the burgers or pizza. Or do not ask about the production of olive oil in the Pokemon universe.
00:37:31
Speaker
Listen, but people drink Moo Moo milk. We don't question that. Yep. We don't question that one of them decided to milk a Moo Moo. <unk> second A milk tank?
00:37:44
Speaker
Oh yeah. Someone- Hey, just think of this thoughts in everyone's world. In the real world, from milk to eggs, someone had thought of, Hey, I wonder what happens when I do this to this cow.
00:37:56
Speaker
Excuse me. Oh yeah. I mean, I think they watched the- the- the- the cow's calf. So they watched the cow- ah No, we're not considering this. ah <unk> I'm a farmer, that even weirds me out to this day, and I've thought about this for years.
00:38:15
Speaker
It does.
00:38:18
Speaker
Here's something else. They did the exact same thing to goats. That one I think is more questionable. Dakota's riding a storm telling me to stop it probably. I see him typing.
00:38:33
Speaker
I'm in trouble people. help me won't oh small It's not virgin oil it's virgin small lips oil as interesting with the entire time you guys are go take that it's not virgin oil it's virgin small lipss oil
00:38:51
Speaker
So many things! And what happens when the Swalove, uh... loses...
Evelyn's Olive Oil Mishap
00:38:58
Speaker
Oh no! Extra virgin Swalove war. That is answer we will not be answering today, everyone.
00:39:03
Speaker
And now we're ready to break and split off to our houses! Okay, so who who wants to go first?
00:39:14
Speaker
Um... I can. If you guys can't decide, we can roll off for it. Do we do we want to roll off for it?
00:39:24
Speaker
Uh, Roll D12s. Roll that way we're not wasting any good D20 rolls. We'll do D4, I don't have a D12 with me, I don't want to go looking for it.
00:39:36
Speaker
In this house, we believe in the gambler's fallacy. Yes, of course. Can we do either D10 or D4?
00:39:46
Speaker
Sure, we can use D10. are fun and we don't use them very often. Actually, is this a D9? Where is my D10? D9 doesn't exist, so I sure hope it's not a D9. That is not a question you should be asking. Since when does a D9 exist?
00:40:04
Speaker
Oh, it's d a D8. Jake, I don't know if a D9 exists. D9 does not exist. Hey, there's a D3. that exists, anything exists.
00:40:17
Speaker
D3? yeah No, I guess I can see that. No, I can see that. That's the one rolls around like... Oh, yeah. So either D8 or Choose. don't... I don't care. Okay. What do you think, Gavalin? D8 or Uh, D8.
00:40:37
Speaker
D8. Okay. Here we go
00:40:41
Speaker
we go. I don't think I've ever used my D12.
00:40:46
Speaker
oh No, I lost my... Okay. Five. We got a roll again. We tied. Or does this mean that Jake has to go first?
00:40:58
Speaker
don't know. I guess he gets... I got a seven. I got a three. Evelyn goes first. I'm last. three yeahly goes first
00:41:09
Speaker
asked Say what? You're first, Evelyn. jake Jake... I got a three. So you won. Okay. Okay, so we're gonna go with Evelyn first. You took the Olive Whirl, right?
00:41:25
Speaker
Mm-hmm. Okay, so which house did you decide to go to? I'm gonna try the Small of. Okay. So, um, you get to the Small of Whirl, what you see... Excuse me.
00:41:40
Speaker
You see a small house. It is a small wooden house, single story. It's... Shall I say it again? It's very small. um And it's got some windows. It's got a small little door and a tiny little chimney on top.
00:41:56
Speaker
Your objective? Get inside and deliver this present. Okay. Hmm. Can I take a look in through the window?
00:42:07
Speaker
Uh, sure.
00:42:11
Speaker
yeah, so you look in through the window and you can see the Christmas tree in the living room. It's very bright, very obvious. Um, but you can also see that next to the living room is the bedroom where a family of small lives are sleeping.
00:42:28
Speaker
They're all sleeping. Okay. Um, is there anything? Can I see inside their kitchen? Uh, sure, yeah. um Their kitchen is very small.
00:42:41
Speaker
s- Not very fancy or anything. It's got stovetops, got everything you'd expect from a kitchen. Anything you're looking for in particular? Does it have olive oil in it?
00:42:53
Speaker
Uh, there are food items out in the open that you can immediately see. Can I look inside their, um... Wait, am I inside the house? No, you're not. You have to find a way inside the house.
00:43:06
Speaker
Okay. Um, maybe I can climb. I'm going to try to maybe climb through the chimney because or look to look down in the chimney because I don't want to if in case there's a fire in it. Okay. As you try and get on top of the house, it's not like a five centimeter tall house. It's like a house. It's just a small house.
00:43:30
Speaker
So how are you getting up on the roof? Um, climbing... Hmm. Is there a... I wonder if there is a... Like, a ledge that I can stand? Like, just... A ledge?
00:43:44
Speaker
A ledge like a cliff something? Like, jump onto, like, What? Can you... Can you so clarify what do you mean by the ledge? Wait. Actually, you know what?
00:43:55
Speaker
I was gonna say, say like like, like, you know, like, the look You know how, like, a window has, like, a windowsill? Yeah. Okay. Like, she climbs up onto that and then tries to get up to the roof from there.
00:44:07
Speaker
Okay. So, go ahead and roll me... Acrobatics? Athletics? Acrobatics. Acrobatics. i think nice ah Whichever one's... right Which one you're better at.
00:44:22
Speaker
Um... Maybe... Okay, actually, plan B. Go into the... Climb up to the windowsill and then try to open the window and get in.
00:44:36
Speaker
Okay, so you want to climb up on the windowsill?
00:44:40
Speaker
Yeah. Okay, I'm still going to use your roll acrobatics. Okay. There's a game mechanic that is in play that will be explained once you take this roll.
00:44:53
Speaker
Four. Four. So you manage to still get up on this windowsill, but you slip and hit your leg against the wall, which gives you one strike.
00:45:08
Speaker
Once you get three three strikes, the family will wake up. What that means to you, or where you are when that happens. We'll see when we get there.
00:45:19
Speaker
It could be bad. You'd be inside and the family wakes up and sees you. Or they could wake up and you're outside and you can't deliver the presents. So, try not to get three strikes. Okay. So on the windowsill. You are on the windowsill and you have gained one strike.
00:45:34
Speaker
Okay. Hmm. Can open the window? Um...
00:45:43
Speaker
So which window is this? I'm gonna say it's the living room window. It's the first one you looked at. Living room, okay. Okay. I rolled a luck roll. It's 11. It is unlocked. However, as you poke it, it starts to squeak a little.
00:45:58
Speaker
It doesn't give you a strike, but you must roll stealth in order to open this window. Stealth. Okay.
00:46:09
Speaker
Another four. Oh jeez. You managed to push the window open, but it just makes a really loud squeaking noise, which gives you a second strike.
00:46:21
Speaker
So, the window is open and you can fit through it, but that was really loud. Great. Eugh. Yikes. Um...
00:46:35
Speaker
Okay. Um...
00:46:39
Speaker
Jeez, I'm gonna have to close this thing too, because I don't want them to... don't want to get chilly inside this house. Um, for that sake. Um, I'm gonna try to climb... let me Let me look through and see if there is a way to get down from inside here. Uh, yeah, it's only like a two-foot drop, or two or three feet drop. You can make it down without needing any kind rolls. Okay.
00:47:04
Speaker
Okay. Um...
00:47:11
Speaker
Hmm.
00:47:13
Speaker
Okay. I'm going to try to climb through the window and jump down the other side. Gotcha. So you're now inside the living room and the Christmas tree is right in front of you. Yeah.
00:47:26
Speaker
Okay. Can I see, since I've got the olive oil, can I see what other presents they have? They're all wrapped up. There are presents under the tree.
00:47:36
Speaker
You cannot see what they are because they're, well, wrapped up.
00:47:41
Speaker
Can I go in? I'm gonna go into the kitchen and see if they have any. Well, first, let me put down. Let me put down the olive oil there. guess but Is it wrapped? It is. I'm, you know, i I'm gonna say but.
00:47:58
Speaker
but Sure. The reason I'm hung up on that is you guys know what they are, but if they were wrapped up, you probably wouldn't know what it is. So... I mean, with the presence that they are, if they're wrapped nicely, it probably wouldn't be too hard to tell what they are just by the shape.
00:48:20
Speaker
Eh, sure. I guess. okay yeah Yeah, I'm gonna say they're wrapped. It doesn't make that big of a difference, but... Alright, I'm gonna put it down just in case I have to leave.
00:48:32
Speaker
But, um... Um... Put it beneath the tree. And then go into the kitchen just to see if they have a lot of olive oil.
00:48:43
Speaker
Okay. and they cow Okay, go ahead and roll investigation. Okay. This is a classic investigation Oh man, I got another four.
00:48:55
Speaker
How do you have another four? So... Oh no... Jesus Christ. So... I don't know what to do for this. He just started banging coverjump.
00:49:09
Speaker
don't know... I don't know what to give you from this. You know how there's that that meme of but the one cupboard that's just like the door is closed but like there's the plates and bowls that are like leaned up against the door.
00:49:28
Speaker
if you open the door they all fall. i love that okay so so you're opening up a couple cupboards eventually you find a cupboard that's called olive oil it has like olive oil written on they have a cover for all and you open it and there's like two shelves on the bottom shell there's nothing but cobwebs and it's clearly empty there's nothing there it's obviously there's supposed to be olive oil there but there's none
00:49:59
Speaker
And on top is a ton of dishes that come tumbling down on top of your head and shatter on the ground as you start to see lights flick on and you hear voices in the bedroom.
00:50:12
Speaker
And ah look graphfi I was going to say you hear the cocking of a shotgun, but.
00:50:20
Speaker
So the family's awake um and you have like a good 10 seconds to get the fuck out of Dodge. What do you do? Uh, run. Run. Out the window?
00:50:33
Speaker
To the wall?
00:50:36
Speaker
To the wall. Yeah.
00:50:41
Speaker
I can't tell if you just didn't get that reference. Run to the tree and then I'm gonna wave. And I'm gonna pretend that I'm one of Santa's. You're gonna pull the Grinch. Okay, okay. Yeah. Oh no.
00:50:53
Speaker
Is that you, Sallie Mae? no. Okay, okay, so you hear some thundering and you're standing by the tree for some reason.
00:51:09
Speaker
Okay, the Smallu family. What are the evolutions of Smallu? know there's Smallu and then that's all i know. It's Dalu and Arboliva.
00:51:21
Speaker
What? Are those actual Pokemon? Oh, I've seen these things. I have never heard those names before. o Okay.
00:51:32
Speaker
Alright, so you have a small of, and then the... the...
00:51:41
Speaker
Hmm, the other ones. You already forgot the name. There it is. Sorry, I'm trying to look for it. Smolov, Dahlov, and Arboliva. Okay, so you see a family of Smolov, Dahlov, and Arboliva. There's two Arboliva, they're clearly the parents. And they see you like, STOP THIEF!
00:51:57
Speaker
What are you doing to our presence? I, uh, I'm... I'm Santa's helper. I'm an elf. You're right. Santa's not real.
00:52:09
Speaker
And the children were- Uh, sure he is. He hired me. I'm i'm a W-2 employee of Santa Claus... Santa's Workshop Incorporated. Santa doesn't hand out W-2s in January. Besides, tax season isn't until right around the corner. And the, uh, there's a couple small-of that are hanging around the legs of the Arboliva. And they're like, WHAT DO YOU MEAN SANTA'S NOT REAL?!
00:52:36
Speaker
Yeah, he is. He is real. I've seen his face. He's... What kind of Pokemon is he? He's he's a Chansey!
00:52:47
Speaker
You should have said Delibird! What are you talking about? Santa's not a Chansey, he's a Delibird!
00:52:57
Speaker
Sorry, no, i haven't... ah i'm ah I'm a bad employee. Um, I... Anyway, I have your present. is Are you sure Santa's real?
00:53:09
Speaker
Yes! Yes, he is real. He gave me a present, and I gave Alright, let me see your W2! Um... Yeah!
00:53:21
Speaker
Takes out... Um... I still have... Okay, I still have a copy of... I have, like, the back page of my record contract, I'm gonna just ah pretend that's my W2. Okay, so you hand it to this so small loop, who comes out between the laser, I believe it. Whoa! It's a real document! This must be a Wow, you're the real deal!
00:53:46
Speaker
What am I witnessing
00:53:51
Speaker
right now? Anyway, Santa's got insurance. Sorry for the- Sorry for all the dishes- INSURANCE?!
00:54:03
Speaker
Wow, what kind of insurance? Tell us all about it. it's um it's It's property insurance. Oh, property insurance. So are we getting paid then?
00:54:15
Speaker
do we have to take you to court? No, you won't. no On just this next cast of Judge Judy, Santa Claus caught breaking into this woman's home.
00:54:25
Speaker
Wow.
00:54:30
Speaker
well just so santa's santa's Santa's elf lawyers will reach out and settle the case with you. I will see them in court!
00:54:48
Speaker
I don't know where this is going.
00:54:54
Speaker
One of the Arboliva goes over and closes the window. he's like, just to leave. And he like goes and opens and unlocks the doors. It's like, get the fuck out.
00:55:06
Speaker
Okay. Merry Christmas. where twelve rookie And he slams the door in your face.
00:55:16
Speaker
Don't you feel the holiday love?
00:55:21
Speaker
Oh, boy. Okay. Okay. Oh, man.
00:55:30
Speaker
Damn it.
00:55:33
Speaker
they they took They took the last page of my record contract. Wait, they didn't give it back? No. They got an authentic Santa Claus Oh,
00:55:49
Speaker
no. It's the page with my signature.
00:55:57
Speaker
Okay, so are you heading back to Roger's place then? Yeah. Okay, cool. So we're gonna cut over to Eli. Which package did you have? i have the strange parcel that I'm gonna bring to Ursa Ring.
Eli's Lingerie Blunder
00:56:15
Speaker
Okay, so you're going to the Ursaring's place. up As you get to the address, you see... shit. Hold on, I'll close my notes.
00:56:25
Speaker
You see a large brick house. It is a large manor with three stories and a large chimney on top. It is quite a fancy place, and on the third floor, you can see a massive Christmas tree.
00:56:43
Speaker
but Sorry, not the third floor, the second floor. On the second floor you see a massive Christmas tree. Does the chimney stop in the room with the Christmas tree?
00:56:56
Speaker
It does not seem to be in the same, mood it does not seem to be above the Christmas tree. I'm gonna say it's like in the, yeah, sure why, it's like in the corner of the house. It doesn't seem to be in the same room with the Christmas tree, but you don't know for sure.
00:57:13
Speaker
Alright. I'm still gonna try to do the proper thing and go climb up the wall because I'm a little syndical. I can use the the little gaps between the bricks as little climbing holes. Yeah, like that.
00:57:35
Speaker
Climb up the wall.
00:57:39
Speaker
Okay, so go ahead and roll me athletics with... Yeah, roll athletics. Just roll athletics. Alright.
00:57:51
Speaker
That's a nat one. Fucking crazy. Okay, so you managed to get about halfway up the wall when one of your hands slips and you drop the package back down.
00:58:03
Speaker
Uh-oh.
00:58:07
Speaker
Welp. Uh, am I high enough up that I would take fall damage if I just like... You can, you can climb back down.
00:58:17
Speaker
Okay. Uh, I guess I'll, yeah, I'll climb back down. Check to make sure the package is all right. Okay, and that was one strike. The package made a loud sound as I hit the ground.
00:58:30
Speaker
Interesting. you get the package and package is slightly damaged. You can somewhat see inside. Okay.
00:58:44
Speaker
I'll take a quick peek inside then. It's something cloth. It almost looks like clothes maybe. Okay. I'm going to try to fix the packaging as best I can.
00:59:01
Speaker
Okay. So, okay. um It's not going to result in a strike or anything, but just roll me performance to see how well you fix it. so See if you can fix it back to quality standards.
00:59:14
Speaker
Yeah, okay.
00:59:20
Speaker
Well, that's a 3 minus 1, 2. You managed to tear it open slightly further by accident while trying to put the tape back in place. Oh, great. You guys gotta stink as me and Santa, I'm not go lie.
00:59:34
Speaker
At this point, you can clearly see what's inside the package. No one's rolling good. Good thing we did the Christmas episode instead of the regular episode tonight. We'd be dead, we'd be dead. Yeah, you guys would be dead. Okay,
00:59:53
Speaker
so yeah, you can see inside because you accidentally tore the tape open instead of shutting it by accident. So you can see what's inside. Okay.
01:00:04
Speaker
And what you see is probably not what you expect an Ursaring to wear. What you see is a ah scantily clad piece of lingerie.
01:00:21
Speaker
Which explains why the package was so anonymous. I'm going to hightail it over to the Lapanese house then and hope that Walter didn't get too far along and tell him we gotta trade places here.
01:00:43
Speaker
Okay, so you head over to the Loch Bunny's house, and what you see is tons of decorations. Tons and tons of Christmas decorations.
01:00:53
Speaker
There's fancy ones that move around. There's like, yeah, there's like fancy ones that move around that make noise. All so sorts of stuff. It's a, uh, the house is like a, it's a medium house made of, uh, stone, I guess.
01:01:08
Speaker
Uh, it's a pretty modest house. It's a pretty average house, i would say. And trying to get inside, you see Walter. I'll be like, like, whisper yelling, Walter!
01:01:21
Speaker
We, we, we, I think we mixed them up here. I'm pretty sure my package is supposed to go to, uh, the Delophanie. Your, uh, your punching bag is probably supposed to go to the, Ursaring.
01:01:38
Speaker
Oh, already hauled it up here. You gotta be kidding me.
01:01:43
Speaker
Uh, just put it in your bag. It'll weigh a lot less that way. only have one bag! or yeah You know our- no, like our regular bag. You know our bags are magical, right?
01:01:56
Speaker
I- um... I don't know. I don't care. myh This ain't in lore, but I couldn't put my ores in there. They'd be sticking out. you Yeah, well, the ores were a special case.
01:02:10
Speaker
You know what good Christmas gift? Just give them a golden ore. Oh, the ores. Yes. Yeah. Well, all as you know, gold is resistant to magic, so you know how it is. Alright, the funniest thing. all Alright, catch! as It just throws the the punching bag off at you. Okay. with It's not in the bag, so it just getting thrown at you.
01:03:07
Speaker
17, yeah, you'll do it. okay na now Now that you've aimed perfectly at Bruce, Bruce, you need to you need to either roll a d20 to dodge out of the way or try and catch this bag.
01:03:19
Speaker
Yeah, i'll I'll try to catch this, I guess. Okay, go ahead and also roll athletics. What's that? o That's a 14 plus 1, 15. Yeah, you can it.
01:03:31
Speaker
Yeah. yeah you can catch it yeah finally succeeded in something tonight. Yeah, that's the highest roll we've gotten all day.
01:03:42
Speaker
Yeah. Well, we we and me and Jake both just rolled 14s. We just had different modifiers.
01:03:52
Speaker
Okay. I got it, Walter.
01:03:58
Speaker
right, now throw up mine.
01:04:02
Speaker
Uh...
01:04:04
Speaker
I might want to just bring it to you that that the package tore open a little bit, so... You tore the package? i I might have dropped it halfway down the building.
01:04:18
Speaker
I carried up... I didn't put it in the bag, I carried this thing up. Scaling a wall! I'm not sure how you got up there, but... it It kind of tore open a bit when it hit the ground.
01:04:33
Speaker
and Oh my god. so yeah Walter would just scale back down. okay.
01:04:44
Speaker
Now how hard is it to carry this up upper a wall? um Harder than you think when it's a brick wall?
01:04:56
Speaker
This is a stone wall. They're not much different.
01:05:01
Speaker
Look, I don't know.
01:05:04
Speaker
it It wasn't my best climbing, okay? it is but My arms aren't exactly designed to be climbing and carrying something.
01:05:16
Speaker
that This box is like almost as big as I am. oh Walter just slowly starts scaling again. Back up. okay okay go ahead and uh i guess we'll let walter take over from now unless uh bruce wants to stay and help which you can do if you want yeah why not i might as well oh just make sure nothing goes wrong here okay how about you you stay down the ground and don't let anyone touch that weight that punching bag exactly
01:05:51
Speaker
Okay, so go ahead and roll another athletics roll to see how well you can climb up this. I take it you're trying to go in the chimney? 15, yeah, I'm slowly climbing. Yeah, whatever there's an opening. Okay. Chimney, window.
01:06:04
Speaker
oh hold on, actually, let me look at my nose. What do I have for a medium health? Oh, no. And worst case scenario, I could just run through a wall and place it and run out.
01:06:15
Speaker
If you do that, I'm giving you all three strikes immediately.
01:06:22
Speaker
Just punch one brick. Just punch a brick open, slide the thing in, put the brick back. Okay. So you're are you trying to climb up to the roof are you checking windows?
01:06:33
Speaker
I'm climbing up to the roof. Okay, okay. So with a 15, you manage to climb up the roof. No issue. That'll show Bruce. And you get all the way to the top and you can see quite a ways away.
01:06:46
Speaker
It's a ah two-story house, I'd say. So you can actually see pretty far throughout the town. He's like, huh. ah He's like blinded a little bit by the lights. Like, okay, someone's got too much Christmas spirit.
01:07:02
Speaker
Yep. Behind you is Yeah, the stone chimney behind You get to the chimney, and as you peer over into the chimney, it's full of soot and black dust. So you cough a little bit as you breathe in some of that dust.
01:07:25
Speaker
Hmm. Let's see. um Well, he can just use his force palm to use force to push it back down without making noise.
01:07:35
Speaker
Just push the soot down while he's going down. yeah It's soot that's all over the walls. I don't think saw that word. No, it'll be fine. He'll climb. youll He's fine. He's used to suit.
01:07:47
Speaker
He's used to suit in houses. Suit? Who calls it suit? i and Listen, I can't pronounce that word very well. Oh, okay. Well, uh, so, okay, so what are you trying to do? Scale down the chimney. He he doesn't care if he gets dirty.
01:08:07
Speaker
Okay, gotcha. Um, I guess that's just another athletics check. A lot of athletics check. A lot of athletic things happening. 19. 19! Yeah, alright. You managed to get down. You even managed to stay mostly clean.
01:08:22
Speaker
You've got soot on your hands and your feet, but you're not, like, completely covered or anything. You managed to stop yourself from coughing as you get down. And as you enter the house, you are in...
01:08:33
Speaker
a large living room where the Christmas tree is. He will slowly, he will observe, make sure it there's nothing wrong, then slowly put it under the tree and start climb out.
01:08:46
Speaker
Go ahead and roll perception.
01:08:51
Speaker
Um, let's see. What's perception under again?
01:08:58
Speaker
ah great question. Uh, perception is beauty. Oh yeah, I should've known one. That's the main one. though I don't have the character shade open right now, 18. Jeez, you win your rolls. Okay, with an 18... Um, in the corner of the room... Maybe we should've the fight today. In the corner of the room, though they haven't noticed you, you see a Lopunny and an Incineroar sitting together on a couch, bracing each other lovingly.
01:09:28
Speaker
Hmm... They have not noticed you yet, because you managed to scale down the chimney so quietly. So they're facing the tree?
01:09:39
Speaker
no they're facing each other.
01:09:44
Speaker
Very much so. He will try to sneakily put it under the tree while they're snuggling at each other, and slowly try to tiptoe out. Okay, you're gonna go back up the chimney?
01:09:55
Speaker
Yes. Okay, go ahead and roll athletics once again.
01:10:02
Speaker
Um, what is that?
01:10:07
Speaker
Yeah, I got plus 3 to all my stuff, so when it comes to athletics. Okay. Okay, that's, uh, that's fine. You manage to get up. Some suet falls down the the chimney as you slip want your feet once, but it doesn't, like, alert them or anything, and you manage to get back up onto the roof without a hitch.
01:10:29
Speaker
I was saying how hard it is. All it's gotta do is take this. How hard can it be to be a Santa? He walks up to the corner and just like, I'm done. How is it that hard?
01:10:44
Speaker
Hey, not all of us are as athletic as you are, Walter. It's your fault. It should've the gym more.
01:10:55
Speaker
Yeah, I got nothing there. I i was ah working more on wisdom stuff. Listen, I'm a bander and I get to gym more than you.
01:11:10
Speaker
I was working on my wisdom and intelligence more than my athletics, okay? Oh, you're a nerd. As you start to climb down. Okay.
01:11:20
Speaker
Athletics once again.
01:11:24
Speaker
I'm gonna roll plus three evil i just want to point out why i'm gonna roll like i wrote I'm gonna roll like shit for the fight. Yeah, for next episode. I just want to point out, I rolled straight luck for the ah couple to see if they would notice you guys yelling at each other on top of the house.
01:11:46
Speaker
Well, no. what Bruce was on the ground. Walter was on top of the house. Yeah, so we're screaming at each other, like, it's home alone.
01:11:57
Speaker
So, okay yes, oh you managed to nimbly get down the the wall once again, landing softly in a pile of snow. And you guys managed to get out of the place with no issues whatsoever.
01:12:13
Speaker
Let's go do your thing. How hard can it be? I'm gonna watch you carry this thing up the wall. I had to carry two things up the wall, back and down twice. Hey, you tossed this punching bag at me off the top of the wall there. You did not carry this down the wall. I'll it at you Let's go! I'll toss it at you again if you want me to chuck it up there for you.
01:12:36
Speaker
I carried Sammy. This thing is 20 pounds lighter than Sammy. I think it's a lot more than 20 pounds lighter than Sammy, but duly noted. I also routinely woke up Sammy and had to deal with that.
01:12:52
Speaker
Alright. Well, if there's going to be his motivator for when he starts climbing. As you guys are talking, you guys eventually get to the house of the... The Ursa Rain. Yeah, the large house.
01:13:09
Speaker
So, um, so you guys get to the big, once again, it's a big fancy house, big chimney on top, made out of bricks. There's a big fancy tree on the second floor.
01:13:23
Speaker
Alright, get climbing. things Yeah, let's see. Is there like a window that I could get in through in the room with the tree?
01:13:35
Speaker
As you look around, you do see an open window. All you had to do was look for it. There is a window open on the third floor. Oh, third floor. You didn't see that before?
01:13:46
Speaker
Well, I never looked for it. Never rolled perception or anything. the Wolf is like, you've got to be kidding me. Hey, I was just going to try to go down the chimney like Santa's supposed to do.
01:13:58
Speaker
We're even supposed to get caught, so it doesn't matter if we're authentic. I guess. Listen, we are not going to get caught. I don't think know any of us who are going to get caught.
01:14:10
Speaker
Okay? I trust Hikaru completely with her possibility of being sneaky. She is the sneakiest out of all us. She'll never get caught. He is typically the quiet one.
01:14:22
Speaker
If anything, you could just jump onto the fireplace and like you're a fire.
01:14:28
Speaker
Yeah. As long as the fireplace in the same room as the tree. I'm the one with no camouflage, and let's go. get climb get going. I'll watch from here.
01:14:41
Speaker
all Alright. I will attempt to climb again. As a reminder, there's already one strike on the cells, so you have two strikes left. If DB, I'll start going to the to front of the door and start to pretend like I'm a caroler. Alright. So, I'm saying this once again. Go ahead and roll athletics.
01:15:04
Speaker
No advantage Walter cheering me on or anything. Can I help him get it through the window? Can I help him get through the window? The window's on the third floor. You're not that tall. Never mind. Alright.
01:15:17
Speaker
Nat 20! Oh, Nat 20! Damn. Plus one. Yeah. Yeah, invigorated by Walter's pessimism of you, you manage to Spider-Man climb all the way up this wall and then sideways into this window.
01:15:35
Speaker
And with a nat 20, with sheer luck, this is the most oiled window in the entire house. Silent. And you manage to climb inside and you find that it leads into a bathroom.
01:15:49
Speaker
Okay. Christmas Stukies. We're now inside the bathroom. Yeah, so I will now be hearing this punching bag through and just like quietly open the door to the bathroom, take a quick peek around and see if I can find like a stairwell anyway, anywhere, because I know that the i The tree is on the second floor and I'm currently on the third floor.
Bruce's Dramatic Escape from Ursaring's House
01:16:22
Speaker
So you open up the door and it opens pretty quietly. um You hear some snoring as you realize you are in the master bathroom and the door you open leads straight into the master bedroom where there are two ursarings currently sleeping.
01:16:43
Speaker
I should have gone with the chimney. Well, I'm going to just silently tiptoe through the room and go out the door. Okay.
01:17:00
Speaker
Yeah, I'm not gonna make you roll anything for it. So, yeah, you managed to open the door. and You head down the hall, and there's a bunch of doors on the left and on the right.
01:17:12
Speaker
And straight ahead of you is a stairwell that leads downstairs. I will be taking that stairwell downstairs. Go ahead and roll me a straight d20, a luck roll.
01:17:26
Speaker
See if any of these stairs are squeaky. oh
01:17:31
Speaker
Well, that's a six. With a six? Okay. um As you are heading downstairs, the bottom step starts squeaking, and you are at the bottom floor, but just so softly, the bottom stairs start squeaking, which reverberates through the entire big house.
01:17:51
Speaker
the The second floor, and not the bottom floor, right? um Yeah, yeah. It should stop at the second floor, too. So you're at the bottom of the second floor. Yeah, yeah. Yeah. So, mark that on as two strikes.
01:18:03
Speaker
You find yourself in the main living room. what's I'm realizing now it's kind of weird that the living room's on the second floor, but whatever. so It's a mansion. It's probably got multiple living room-like rooms.
01:18:20
Speaker
so They probably wanted to use the one closer to the master bedroom for their holiday room. Who knows? yeah sure I don't know how mansions work. Neither do I. I am mansionless.
01:18:33
Speaker
So, you i see a massive Christmas tree sitting in the middle of the in the middle of the living room, and as tons of presents under the tree. And there's a spot for one more present to fit.
01:18:48
Speaker
Suspiciously punching bag-shaped, Wow, almost like they knew what they were getting already. Crazy. I will just slot it nicely into that spot.
01:19:00
Speaker
And as it sits in the excellent place, now you need to get out the house.
01:19:06
Speaker
Is there... so, Can I open the window in this room? Uh, yeah, there's a window leading outside.
01:19:17
Speaker
I will roll... well Well, I had you roll luck before. You can roll luck to see if it's squeaky or not. Okay.
01:19:26
Speaker
That's another nat 20! They have some well-oiled windows in this house. Yes. Yes, they do. Are you sure the oil's not for them? The bottle's been doing its job right. Oh no. so We got the oil in their own house.
01:19:44
Speaker
that's right. They needed the olive oil to oil their windows. They need their windows to be silent.
01:19:53
Speaker
So yeah, you managed to open the window and since you were on the second store, you're much lower to the ground. ah If you wish to rappel down the wall, rappel's the wrong word, just climb down the wall, you can require once again an athletics check.
01:20:07
Speaker
What if I want to just jump out the window? You can. Hey, what is a choice? do Do you think you can catch me from here? Where what where are you exactly? Are you what are you like on the opposite side of the house asking that? Because I'm in the exact same window you were climbed up and waiting for you.
01:20:27
Speaker
no we can see the Christmas tree from our side of the house, so presumably it's... wal Walter's on the ground looking up at Bruce who's now in a second story window. Yeah.
01:20:40
Speaker
Sure? Couldn't you just climb down? I could, but that would require another athletics roll, and i don't entirely trust them today.
01:20:56
Speaker
Okay, I guess instead of just slowly falling while grinding, you can just jump with full force at me and hope I catch you. Go ahead and roll a luck d20 roll, an accuracy check if you will, to see if you can launch yourself while correctly. That's a 13.
01:21:14
Speaker
Okay, okay. So you manage to you leap out the window at Walter. commo later And i i like I leap out, but in a way that I can turn around and shut the window since I know it's nice and oiled to leave no trace.
01:21:33
Speaker
Okay, okay, i like that. Now, Walter, I need you to roll a strength check because he is hurtling at you. Unless you wish to dodge out of the way, i need you roll a strength check to catch him.
01:21:44
Speaker
Oh, decisions, decisions. Like, need to go with my roll or choose a dodge. How thick is the snow? Uh, it's thick enough that he probably won't die. What?
01:21:58
Speaker
It's a second story window. You're not gonna die from a fall like that. Hey, I said i probably won't die But you never know. Maybe you'll hit your head on the... Maybe I'm just getting hit by a random plane.
01:22:16
Speaker
Who knows? knows?
01:22:21
Speaker
um so
01:22:25
Speaker
I'll tell you, he's he's not gonna die if you don't catch him. How much damage will he take? i don't that's for me to figure out later. If you don't catch me.
01:22:39
Speaker
I'm going to roll my Morley if I want to be pranking this. All right, you win. Let me 21. 21 for strength. It's an athletics check. you've been on fire with those today. It doesn't he even phase you when you catch them.
01:22:55
Speaker
Yeah, it doesn't even phase you. See, like like you said earlier, you've carried Sammy before. I'm like... And then he throws him into a snow pile. Just spikes him into the ground.
01:23:09
Speaker
Okay, deserved that. But hey, it was a pretty smooth exit out of that building, can't you see can't you say? As soon as you pop your head up to say, the giant snowball hits you as well.
01:23:22
Speaker
And it immediately melts as I light my flames.
01:23:32
Speaker
Hey, careful! Flames are on a house, you know! this is a brick house! It's safe! And also, we're nice and far away now. don't trust you around houses with flames.
01:23:44
Speaker
We've destroyed so many houses. I literally destroyed wo one house. Okay, let's get out of here. We've destroyed- Hey, finished our which but we're we're a person of interest in about a block of destruction.
01:24:00
Speaker
Hey, I had nothing to do with that one. you're You're still part of the group, so you're still guilty by association. Okay, off we go back to Roger. She's going to flaunt on us how perfectly Hikaru did this compared to us. She's going to flaunt on us.
01:24:23
Speaker
As you guys ah head back, you guys arrive at Roger's place, and you see Hikaru sitting outside on the porch waiting for you guys.
01:24:34
Speaker
Hey guys, how did it go Someone that would decided to jump out of a building. Who? Don't worry about it, not important. he thought he He wanted me to catch him from a two-story building.
01:24:50
Speaker
he also ruined the present. Like, come on. The only thing worse than ruining present is getting caught, man. what do you mean ruining the present? like He dropped it and got ripped. Open it.
01:25:03
Speaker
Got ripped! Hey, at least I was able to find out that we had the wrong house. So I was able to fix that mistake before it happened. Took you long enough, I had to scale wall with it and then have to scale back down.
01:25:20
Speaker
You chucked the punching bag at me. You did not scale down the wall with the punch. I still had to scale down. I still had scale down. That's a lot harder.
Stealthy Present Delivery Plan
01:25:29
Speaker
then scale back up again with a new item that's already pre-ripped.
01:25:34
Speaker
Which you had no problem doing, because you're Mr. Athletics over here. How do you have so much trouble carrying a punching bag, but not the other thing, up a wall?
01:25:46
Speaker
I don't know. I think having you there helped me out a lot somehow. how should just football throw you into the wall into the glass and just have it be a quick simple smash and dash.
01:25:59
Speaker
it Into the wall. What? I should just football you through a window and just did a quick smash and dash.
01:26:08
Speaker
we're We're trying to... stealthily put these presents in, break through houses to get the presents delivered.
01:26:19
Speaker
wouldn't get caught. Only an amateur gets caught. Right, Hikaru? Yeah. ah Yeah, you're right totally right. Only amateurs get caught.
01:26:32
Speaker
Exactly. as you guys just said As you guys are saying this, you hear the door creak open from the turn, and you see Roger peeking out. He's like, oh You
New Task: Deliver Cookies to the Grunch
01:26:42
Speaker
guys are back! Did you guys still deliver for the presents?
01:26:45
Speaker
Yep. ah Yeah, I think so. Wonderful, wonderful. Are you guys up to one more task? Oh, come on! Depends on what it is. I want to go to sleep for Christmas. I gotta wake up early.
01:26:58
Speaker
celebrated alone. Christmas starts at midnight. This must be completed by midnight. Do you guys take out the extra challenge? Yes. Perfect, perfect.
01:27:09
Speaker
I have one more gift for you. And he reaches into the bag and he pulls out a cookie tin. Cookies! I need you.
01:27:23
Speaker
to deliver this to the Grunch up at the top of Kraglespire.
01:27:33
Speaker
But didn't he to- But before you guys get worried, don't worry. that the The ski lift is working this year. The ski lift is operational. Yay! Okay.
01:27:45
Speaker
Didn't we already have a problem with him?
01:27:48
Speaker
Uh, yeah, I remember something about you guys breaking a bell or something.
01:27:56
Speaker
Something like that. I'm sure it wasn't important. That's not important right now.
01:28:10
Speaker
Anyway... here is dear Here's the key. You guys can turn the ski lift on with this. Just a turn the key on. You own the ski lift?
01:28:23
Speaker
Maybe. i didn't think about that. Yes. I have now decided yes.
01:28:30
Speaker
How do you think I have this big house? I get royalties every time someone uses it. cur
01:28:39
Speaker
By the way, you guys owe me $3.50. But the local priest in town just randomly has the the rights to the ski lift, huh?
01:28:50
Speaker
Ah, you never know. Alright, so you don't know my life. The Grunge has never been delivered a present before, but we figured we would include him in this year's celebration.
01:29:05
Speaker
I think it is time we, uh, or at least Mr. Claus this has decided that it's time that we include him as an actual person. He's been granted the honor of being an honorary person. Okay.
01:29:25
Speaker
We decided he wasn't worth treating like a person before, so... Now we've decided to change our minds! Even though he's so horrible! So how are you guys on the Naughty then?
01:29:37
Speaker
You treated someone like they were a
Mountain Ski Lift Adventure
01:29:39
Speaker
person? By the way, what's a human? What? Great question. Anyway, would you guys deliver this to the top of the mountain? The ski lifts should be nice and heated, too, so you guys should be nice and warm.
01:29:54
Speaker
How is it heated? Isn't it just open-air to the elements? Oh, wait, that's how ski lifts work. It could be a heated gondola. Yeah, yeah, I was thinking of a gondola. Oh, my gosh, that would be so expensive to keep that heated.
01:30:10
Speaker
I was thinking of a gondola, yeah. Whatever, let's just get the ski lift. Yeah. Yeah, yeah, the the the seats are heated. That's what I meant, definitely. Oh, right, the go this the heated part of for the only the VIP. Sorry, that's the gondola for only us rich people.
01:30:28
Speaker
Anyway, if you do this for me, maybe my Santa Claus will come back to me one day. Now that I've done him a great favor, you guys have done him a great favor.
01:30:40
Speaker
He says with a suspicious smile.
01:30:45
Speaker
Hmm. Okay. ah Well, I can't wait to see how those heated seats feel. um Anybody with me? Yeah, sure, why not? What's one more gri present?
01:31:01
Speaker
Okay. so are you guys heading out?
01:31:08
Speaker
Okay, so you guys head out of Wintersburg with the tin of cookies and Eventually you guys get to the ski lift which last time you guys were here You had no key to the ski lift and the controls were all frozen However, this time it is indeed the ski lift is in working condition.
Debating Cookie Delivery to the Grunch
01:31:29
Speaker
Um, there's a keyhole and a bunch of buttons and
01:31:35
Speaker
Okay, two which one of us has the key? I thought you did. forgot the key. Oh, okay. Okay, I'll put the key in and see what happens. okay Okay, so the control panel, the cover to the control panel opens up and you see a bunch of buttons. One says go, one says stop, one says heat, and one says AC for some reason.
01:32:03
Speaker
And one left, one says right. For all the people who want to be using the ski lift in the summertime. Alright. ah Let's... um Listen, there could be some ice types who think it's not cold enough.
01:32:19
Speaker
That's true. Alright. Shall we hit the... Do we get inside, or Yeah. Do we go inside first, or do we...? I assume that the Is the the panel outside the lift? Or is it yes part of the lift? okay No, it's outside the lift.
01:32:39
Speaker
yeah You know guys, you I think we should eventually get a flyer on on our little squad we have. Because if we get stuck, or we're kind of done for unless we just jump.
01:32:53
Speaker
If we get stuck midway through. I'm sure it probably won't get stuck if we start heating it now.
01:33:03
Speaker
Yeah, we better heat it, guess. Too we don't have the oil to oil it Oh man. Okay, you so you guys... Go on.
01:33:17
Speaker
Do you want a ski lift to be well oiled?
01:33:25
Speaker
It's a well oiled... I don't want it to grip onto the i don't know It meant the grip to the wire. Maybe not the essential parts, but just to make it, uh, whatever. The scale isn't a zipline. It isn't just free-falled.
01:33:47
Speaker
it free-falled, it would be nothing that could stop it coming down at that
Christmas Tree Placement Mission
01:33:51
Speaker
velocity. Until it hits the ground. thing is, it like turns around at the bottom, right? So you're just going 15,000 miles an hour, and then you just hit like a super short turn.
01:34:05
Speaker
Your reaction speed's gotta be godly.
01:34:18
Speaker
Alright, let's just turn the ski lift on and get on going up this mountain. Yeah, you guys turn it on, hit the heat button, and the ski lift starts to move.
01:34:32
Speaker
The lifts go up and a bunch of chairs start passing you by. You guys can take any one of them and take and go up. So, as you guys are going up the mountain, you guys can see the entire city of Wintersburg as you climb thousands of feet into the air you can see You can especially see that one house with lots of Christmas lights on it.
01:34:53
Speaker
that's not That one's particularly visible. And after a good like five or so minutes, you guys reached the top of Mount Kraglespire. I also want to point I don't remember if Mount Kraglespire was the original name for this mountain, but I know Mount Kraglespire was the ah name I gave the mountain in the side quest ah side campaign that never got to air. Yeah, I think so. who It sounds familiar.
01:35:21
Speaker
It's just few letters off of Crumpit. Mount Crumpit. Mount Kraglespire. Is Mount Crumpet the one that Grinch loved on? Yeah. At least in Jimmy Carr version. did Jimmy Carey.
01:35:37
Speaker
chi Good old Jimmy. Jimmy Carr? That's a different comedian. Yeah, that was not it by intention, so... That was actually gonna find I lined up like that. So, you guys get to the top of the ski lift, and immediately to your left are two houses.
01:35:56
Speaker
One is very small and contains a herdier.
Chocolate Chip Cookie Dilemma
01:35:59
Speaker
I think it was a herdier? It's been years since I... Yeah, it was a herdier. Okay, it was a herdier. Okay, I'm glad I got that. Okay, so you see Max, the herdier.
01:36:09
Speaker
it it was I think it was Mox. Mox, it is Mox. Yeah, there's a sign over the little doghouse that says Mox. And you see the Grinch's house, a somewhat dilapidated old wooden house has been battered by the wind.
01:36:26
Speaker
Grunge, by the way. The Grunge, did I say the Grinch? The Grunge. Yeah.
01:36:34
Speaker
up the grotch The old grumpy mouse garage that's been hunting the town of Wintersburg. Were we supposed to straight up give this to him or were we supposed to sneak in as well ah um well? Does he have a Christmas tree to put it under?
01:36:51
Speaker
you guys, from the windows you can see, you don't see a Christmas tree in his small little house. So I will leave that up to you guys. Sarah Claus.
01:37:03
Speaker
I vote that we take out a cookie from this cookie tin and leave it over by Max there.
01:37:15
Speaker
So that they can both get little bit of the present.
01:37:23
Speaker
Okay. What do you guys think? Wait, what'd you say?
01:37:29
Speaker
So we've we've got the this cookie tin to give as the gift Granch. And so I think we should take a cookie out and put it over by Max's little house there.
Reflecting on Actions' Legality
01:37:49
Speaker
OK. Is that what you're doing? That's a cute idea. So, as you open up the tin, you see a bunch of freshly baked chocolate chip cookies.
01:38:02
Speaker
And... You're giving one to Mox? Yeah. Okay. So you give one to the... Can Dox get a chocolate chip?
01:38:14
Speaker
Eh, this is a hurdy. Maybe this one can. Wait, hold on. Is Max like his pet or his friend in this situation? Uh, I've probably started from as the pet, but ah it's up to you if you want to feed about chocolate. Pokemon. yeah hey he's the garagee okay
01:38:34
Speaker
Hey, he's the Grunge, okay? The title, Christmas christmas Slavery. No. Are we going with dogs, like dog Pokemon, quote unquote, can't have chocolate in this universe? Well, there's only one way to find out.
01:38:53
Speaker
But, so there's an item, there's an item called sweet. Here's what I'll do. Here's what I'll do. um I'll make this for you. Go ahead and roll history to see what you remember from school.
01:39:04
Speaker
See if you remember any facts. Hold on, hold Let Walter do this, since he's another he says he's a type of dog. This is his specialty. Oh, yeah. Oh, yeah, yeah. Yeah, you know Roll history at advantage. Let's see if Walter learned something about his anatomy. Oh,
01:39:22
Speaker
that fell off the desk. Um... No, he has never been in class. He got five. Ooh, with advantage?
01:39:33
Speaker
Oh, advantage. i didn't know that advantage. oh Yes, yeah, i said with advantage. Because you are a dog-ish Pokemon. 10! 10? Yeah, I'll give it to you. You heard about it from your mom once, because she liked to bake cookies, that she always avoided making cookies with chocolate because they've been rumored to be bad for dog-ish Pokemon.
01:39:53
Speaker
Dang. Okay. Well, I guess we can't... I mean, we could just... I was curious if you guys were gonna catch on to that. Um, so... Alright, so are we breaking in
01:40:07
Speaker
I guess? Or... Technically, these are all going into our crime sheet of breaking and entering. Yeah, put that on the ah felony, Bingo.
01:40:19
Speaker
Are we really... Is breaking and entering a felony? Yes. No, I feel like we've been labeling every crime you guys have done as felonies. Alright, um, fans, if you're watching this, um, I need someone to just make a list of our crimes.
01:40:38
Speaker
And check it twice. And check it twice and see who's been the most naughty who's been the most nice.
01:40:47
Speaker
Probably Walter, um. Okay.
01:40:52
Speaker
If you do that, i will... rep repeat things You will be Walter's number one fan. You can earn that.
01:41:02
Speaker
We know the fans bleeded hard for him because I was a fan when I first submitted for him. We know he's a fake you know we know he's a favorite. Oh yeah, that's right. cause you were a ah We recruited you from the Discord server to play Walter. Yes, I was a fan. Yep.
01:41:17
Speaker
yeah Which is weird every time I hear it. Yeah.
Successful Cookie Delivery to the Grunch
01:41:24
Speaker
Okay, so, uh, so Gruntus House, what do you guys do? You must deliver these chocolate chip cookies.
01:41:36
Speaker
Does it have a note with it? Uh, it has a sticker on it that says from Santa. But other than that, no. I can not try to lockpick with my metal claws.
01:41:50
Speaker
Yeah, you can go for it. Go ahead
01:41:57
Speaker
No, 15. 14?
01:42:01
Speaker
so fifteen fourteen
01:42:04
Speaker
Yeah, you manage to use your middle claws and you fiddle around with the lock for a little bit. Eventually you hear a satisfying click. Why do people always say a satisfying click whenever people pick locks? I feel like that's something everyone says. I've never heard that.
01:42:21
Speaker
I have. I've been listening to a bunch of audiobooks where and I just realized that's something that's always said whenever someone picks a lock. Never heard that from movies or any audiobook I've ever heard.
01:42:32
Speaker
Okay, maybe that's just me. Okay, I'm just going crazy with Christmas fever. Maybe you're just thinking that. Who knows? Maybe? don't know. I've heard it multiple times, but... Anyway, with an unsatisfying click, you open the door.
01:42:48
Speaker
And the door swings open, revealing single-room house where the Grunch is sleeping soundly in the corner of the room. He has not noticed you, but ah the whole place is basically just one big room.
01:43:07
Speaker
And there is no Christmas tree or fire or any sort of joy in this house.
01:43:15
Speaker
Hmm.
Return and Reward from Roger
01:43:16
Speaker
Now, do we put it on one of his pillows like a little mint or we put it on his Christmas tree? No, we were told it has to be specifically under the trees every time we deliver something.
01:43:27
Speaker
But there is no tree. Alright, time to break a tree.
01:43:34
Speaker
That's the question. Do we bring a tree in here or do we just leave them on the counter or something? No, no, We were told specifically by that guy we have to make sure it's under a tree.
01:43:49
Speaker
we were delivering all the other presents, I'm guessing it's the same for this. all Alright, did did you notice any... Evergreen trees around the house? I'm to look around the house.
01:44:05
Speaker
Yeah, I'll say you go outside and you can see some- you guys are on the top of the mountain. Like a very tall mountain, so they're like some scraggly pine trees. There's not really any like big, bushy, classic pine trees, but there's some scraggly pine trees that you can easily cut down. Listen, it just gotta be tree, alright. gonna cut one down and let that fall You also see some really tiny, terrible trees if you really want to be mean to the grunge, but...
01:44:32
Speaker
I don't think we need a Charlie Brown Christmas tree here. Yeah, you guys can make a Charlie Brown Christmas tree. I will try to cut my metal claws and try to get tree.
01:44:44
Speaker
Okay, what's this tree are you getting? Mid-range, just... Okay, okay. so oh Go ahead and re roll... Is it around here?
01:44:55
Speaker
Strength? Yeah, I'm saying it's like out in this backyard or something. Yeah, go ahead and roll strength. 20. Unnatural. 20. 20. You just flick your fingers and the tree falls over. Perfectly cut.
01:45:09
Speaker
Nice. And you have a tree. He's going try to catch it so it doesn't make noise. Okay, okay, okay. Go ahead and roll strength. No, you rolled a nat 20. You can just stop it from falling. I rolled a 17 plus 3.
01:45:25
Speaker
Ah, close enough, it's a dirty 20. You managed to catch the tree. It doesn't make much of a noise, just a soft swishing noise as the needles fly through the air. Now he's gonna try to get it in the room. The house.
01:45:38
Speaker
Okay, now now this I'm gonna have you roll stealth for, cause you're trying to stuff a tree into a ah broken down house. It's not quite fitting. Stealth. Alright, so that's a 19.
01:45:50
Speaker
nineteen Damn, what is with your rolls? Apparently it's just a festive mood. Walter, even though he said he gets cold for the Christmas, he's super festive. Yeah, so you managed to, ah You managed to stuff the truth about it. I'm gonna roll so bad when it comes to the fight next episode. I'm gonna rolling that ones, twos, fours.
01:46:16
Speaker
You manage to get it through because apparently the Grunch is really on top of his doorway oiling game. So it slips right inside and you- where are you putting the tree?
01:46:28
Speaker
In a living room area. Any place that looks like a living room. There is really no living room. It's just like a kitchen bedroom. It's like a a studio apartment, so. Alright, then he'll slowly try to put in the bedroom.
01:46:42
Speaker
Okay, so you stick it next to his to his bed and luckily none of the leaves tickle his nose as he's softly sleeping. And he now has a Christmas tree.
01:46:54
Speaker
A non-decorated one, but a Christmas tree. It's a Christmas tree. Sweet. You got a Christmas tree.
01:47:05
Speaker
Shhh. Now we just put these cookies in the tree and head on back down the ceiling. Quiet! We are right beside him.
01:47:14
Speaker
dead We're whisper yelling here. We're whispering but talking normally so the microphones can pick them up nicely.
01:47:29
Speaker
Yeah. okay The microphones. Yeah, the microphones. Yes.
01:47:35
Speaker
These days, how many times do you say microphones in game? Our characters are going to start a podcast.
01:47:42
Speaker
I'll have headsets on it. I'll have a comment to you live from the garage's house. right ah Alright. IRL streaming. News about Jake Paul's fight that ended in a KO, basically.
01:47:58
Speaker
Jake Paul's first fight against a non-retired member and gets knocked out. So, are you guys heading back down the mountain now? Anything you guys were doing before you head back?
01:48:12
Speaker
Um... No, I got nothing. Okay. So, you guys head back down the mountain. The ski lift is still working, and you guys catch a chair back down.
01:48:25
Speaker
The seats are nice and heated, and you see the town getting closer and closer as you head down the lift. Eventually, you guys get to the bottom, where you guys start... You guys are heading back to the town, right?
01:48:40
Speaker
Yes, I don't know where should go. You know what? Yeah. you guys are head back on There's no orb here. We got to go. Okay. Okay. So you got, wait, are you guys actually heading out?
01:48:53
Speaker
No, we're heading back into town. Okay. Okay. we got to say I would let you that. We still got reward to get. We still got got reward.
Return to Gale Beach and Christmas Preparation
01:49:00
Speaker
Okay. Okay. Okay. You guys trick back towards Rogers church and eventually he you guys get there. You knocking on the door.
01:49:11
Speaker
Yes. yes yeah Walter won't because he knows how he is with knocking. Let me do it. Knock, knock. Knock, knock.
01:49:22
Speaker
Okay. ah what Walter? Oh my god. ah Roger opens the door and he's like, Oh, you guys are back. Did you succeed? we did.
01:49:35
Speaker
Oh, wonderful, wonderful. The conscious is going be so happy. Here, here, I got your guys' rewards! And Roger hands you guys a fuck Jillian dollars.
01:49:48
Speaker
What? Who's Jillian?
01:49:54
Speaker
okay I don't want to know who Jillian is. And because this is non-canon episode, it doesn't matter what your reward is. So, you guys are now the proud owners of one fuck Jillian dollars.
01:50:10
Speaker
what you guys will spend that Who knows? Now we can buy mics to start our podcast with. yeah Yeah. Yeah. We also, uh, huh. What are dollars?
01:50:23
Speaker
He
01:50:27
Speaker
he basically has you a hundred trillion us dollars. right here. You know what? That's probably more um yeah how rare it is. with It's probably worth a lot. It's got the face of President... It's got the face of Zaphod Beeblebrox on the front and the the Blue House on the back.
01:50:49
Speaker
Oh, interesting. Yeah. interesting I also just want to point out this is the first time you guys have ever seen a human because George Washington's face is on the front.
01:51:01
Speaker
Oh god. ah It's a human's reveal after all! The conspiracy truth the burning world exists!
01:51:13
Speaker
So, eventually, you guys head back to Miss Flameback's place, and it is Christmas Day. As you guys are unwrapping presents and stuff under Miss Flameback's fireplace, ah you guys hear a knock on the door.
01:51:29
Speaker
Wait, so are we like all the way back in Gale Beach? Yes, you guys are back at Gale Beach at Miss Flameback's place. is Christmas Day. Okay. I'm gonna assume we used our badges.
01:51:40
Speaker
Uh, sure. We will go with that. Yeah. So, we're just all super tired, I guess. We did all this and around the night. Oh yeah, that's right. Yeah, imagine how tired san the real Santa must be.
01:51:54
Speaker
He's immortal. He's immortal. Or if you can deal with it, he works one day out of the year. And he has all his little minions do all the working when it comes to making the toys.
01:52:04
Speaker
Yeah, Santa can fucking suck it up. So... To be fair, it's one job, but he has to do it all one night for trillions of kids.
01:52:16
Speaker
Okay, so there's a knocking on the door. um Abyss gets up and he goes over and opens the door. And in tumbles a horizon, the mail carrier Emolga.
01:52:28
Speaker
And she just, letters flying everywhere. She stumbles into the the room. She's like oh, oh god, oh no, my letters. Oh, oh no well, oh Let me get them, let me get the help you.
01:52:42
Speaker
And she takes the time and scrambles to pick up all the letters as you help her. She's like, oh, here's this. Here, I got a ah letter for you from Roger.
01:52:52
Speaker
Yeah, Roger. Anyway, that's it. and I got a lot of letters to deliver. Bye. And she zips out the doors, losing tons of letters as she leaves. Okay, now you say that and her Christmas is that I'm only getting the image of the Grinch stole Christmas. She goes, blackmail, blackmail, jury duty, jury duty, pink note, blackmail.
01:53:11
Speaker
Yeah, I love that scene. o So oh inside the letter ah is a letter from Roger. And it says, Dear Hikaru, Bruce, and Walter, Wintersburg had a great Christmas.
01:53:29
Speaker
Everyone got their gifts correctly. Everyone was very happy. Even the Grinch was slightly less grumpy than usual. Hope you had a Merry Christmas and have a great Christmas. I forgot how to end the letter. Anyway, yours truly, Roger.
01:53:46
Speaker
P.S. There is now a wanted sign for a Pikachu in a snowman costume. not a snowman, a Santa outfit. Oh no. then P.S. P.S.
01:53:58
Speaker
By the way, I forgot if cats are alert or can eat chocolate or not. I hope the Grinch isn't sick. runs Roger. I'm pretty sure they are. He just like typed i instead of O by accident.
01:54:12
Speaker
Yes, I crossed it out. O. Yeah.
01:54:17
Speaker
See, they're they're right next to the they're right next to each other on the keyboard. How can you tell the difference?
01:54:25
Speaker
Anyway. They obviously look the same. So that is where we're going to end this episode. Merry Christmas to everyone. Sorry this episode's coming out a day later than normal, but we literally recorded this on our release date, so...
Episode Wrap-up and Thanks
01:54:40
Speaker
Anyway, um if you are in the this description if you're in the description, get out. If you're in the Discord, that's where you should be. So go ahead and join our Discord. I'm going to be polling some people on January 2nd for our giveaway.
01:54:56
Speaker
one person will be getting a Pikachu, one person will be getting a Cyndaquil plush, and one person will be getting a Walter plush. So all you got to do is be in the Discord and your name will be added to the list of people in the Discord. itself and In the giveaway.
01:55:11
Speaker
Also, tell us your favorite Christmas cookie. And if it's not peanut butter cookies, then I'll be disappointed. I'm with you fans. I ain't peanut butter cookie either.
01:55:25
Speaker
So, with that being said, I've been Dakota, here PM your DM your GM. I've been Evelyn, playing Hikaru. I've been Eli, playing Bruce.
01:55:37
Speaker
I've been Jake, playing the peanut butter hater cookie, Molter. And we will see you guys next Christmas! Merry Christmas!
01:55:49
Speaker
Woohoohoo! Okay, we will see you guys next time. Hello and welcome to our end section. Thank you for listening to our episode.
01:56:00
Speaker
Go ahead and join us in our Discord down below as well as our Patreon. As you just heard a few minutes ago, we've got a giveaway going on, so make sure you go ahead and check that out by joining our Discord.
01:56:12
Speaker
And for us, for music for this episode, we have World 3 Map, Snow Overworld, World 5, Snowpoint City, Bell's Theme, and Cold Reception.
01:56:22
Speaker
Thank you so much for listening, and we will see you guys next time.