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What I Learned Through Loss: An Interview with Maddy Rhodes
171 Plays2 months ago
Thanks for listening to Season 1, Episode 1 of The After Dinner Mint, a podcast of Stories I’d Tell You at Dinner. Thanks for sharing your day with us!
In today’s episode, we explore:
- The joys of running (Maddy, not Bec) and cooking
- How Maddy became a Christian from a non-Christian time with a spiritual mother and an atheist father
- What Maddy learned about God’s character and the doctrine of providence through the suffering of a molar pregnancy
Mentioned in this episode:
Want honest stories in your inbox from Christian women in Western Australia on Wednesdays? Sign up to our newsletter here❤️
Dark Clouds, Deep Mercy by Mark Vroegop
When the Noise Won’t Stop by Paul Grimmond
You can find Joseph’s story in Genesis 37-50 in the Bible. The verse we reference is, “But Joseph said to them, ‘Do not fear, for am I in the place of God? As for you, you meant evil against me, but God meant it for good to bring it about that many people should be kept alive, as they are today.’” Genesis 50:19-20 (ESV)
Maddy nominated Sarah Michaels as someone who has encouraged her and would love to hear from next 🫶🏻
PS. I did my best to cut out the background child noise, but there’s still some in the background. I’m never going to record while my kids are awake again! We live and learn 😆🙈
Check out our show notes.
Intro and outro music: Come Back by Ketsa. Licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution-NonCommercial-NoDerivatives 4.0 International License.
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Transcript
Introduction to the Podcast and Guest
00:00:06
Speaker
Welcome to the After Dinner Mint, the podcast for stories I tell you at dinner, where Christian women in Western Australia sharing honest stories with other women. I'm your host, Bec, and if you like what you hear, please subscribe to our newsletter for honest stories in your inbox, Wednesdays from local Christian women.
00:00:22
Speaker
Today's guest is Maddie Rhodes, who's also one of our regular writers. Hey, Maddie. Hey, everyone. Hi, everyone.
Balancing Motherhood and Life
00:00:29
Speaker
So, Maddie, tell us, what does a typical week look like for you?
00:00:33
Speaker
What kind of things make up your week?
00:00:37
Speaker
It seems to change around a little bit because I'm currently on maternity leave and 35 weeks pregnant. So that's a fun phase to be in. but But last year I was studying full-time at Trinity, so doing three units per semester kept me pretty busy.
00:00:52
Speaker
Three-year-old son, who is an absolute delight, You know, it's a big handful while you're studying as well, but it's a big joy. And so, yeah, my week previously was spent days at college, days at home, trying to balance the the load of having study time bleed into everything else and ebbs and flows of study. But after semester ended, it wasn't worth picking up another unit this current semester because I have an imminent arrival of an infant.
00:01:24
Speaker
But... I ended So I've kind of been on a very extended mat leave, which has been awesome. It's just been so good. nice. So nice. Do you nest? Yeah, look, I think I was quite burnt out at the end of the year last year.
00:01:37
Speaker
So I have only just got into the nesting season after about... you know, eight weeks off or something. but it' quite good. It's been good. So good. Yep, you need rest time. It's been good. love that. We've had lots of things going on um in the home. So trying to redo a shed, trying to reorganise bedrooms and, you know, just go through stuff. So it's been it has been a season of...
00:02:01
Speaker
needing to rearrange things, sort things out, throw things out ah just yeah and just spend time with my son because it's just a really lovely period of time. But we get to spend it together before next baby comes.
Joy in Cooking and Socializing
00:02:16
Speaker
Now, Maddie, tell me, like, so if that's kind of like how your regular week looks like, if we shift gears a little bit, like what is it that you're doing that,
00:02:28
Speaker
it just makes you feel like the most alive, like this is what I was made to do, this is what like I just love to do. I find a lot of joy in cooking and serving good meals to friends and some of that just comes with the other part that makes me feel alive and that is that I'm quite a social person. I think outside of being social I think I'm an introvert but I'm actually really not. So I'll think, oh, I have to have people over and then I go.
00:02:55
Speaker
I just feel really happy when I have the people there. I know, me too. It's such a yeah conflict of emotions. but But I guess the other thing that makes me also feel most most myself and most kind of alive and free is I really, I actually just love running.
00:03:12
Speaker
and This is where we differ. I want to be a runner. I want to be a runner. I won't lie, it's not the easiest avenue to start to enjoy, but once you actually hit a bit of a barrier, the mental load of my body is in pain and this is really uncomfortable.
00:03:31
Speaker
And then your body gets used to it and you're like, wow, my body can do this and it's great. And wow, I actually feel a lot of freedom in being able to go for a run and then treating myself to a coffee afterwards.
00:03:43
Speaker
It's great. See, I'm just like, I could do that, but I could just go for a coffee. But like, how did you but you get into running? Well, family members and good friends. And again, I'm actually am more of a socialite than i think and sometimes I think I am.
00:03:59
Speaker
And so, you know, having good friends running. Went to a run club with Steve McAlpine for a little while. Oh, wow. Started Park Run and that was good fun because there were all these people as you're running, they're like, well done. even if you've like stopped to walk or something, they're like, good job.
00:04:15
Speaker
And it's just really nice. yeah so You're like, I need that positive encouragement. I'm like, I need people to follow me around and be like, great job. Stickers for you.
Running and Personal Freedom
00:04:24
Speaker
It's great. It is good. It is good. And even when you're like, yeah, you know what, I walk some of that. That's fine.
00:04:30
Speaker
No one knows needs to know. No, I do just really enjoy i think there's one of those things. It's one of those things where your body, where my body feels like it's doing something it's made to do.
00:04:42
Speaker
So, you know, in its good design, God created that. we can We can walk, we can run, e we can move and push ourselves in such a way that, you know, it brings immense satisfaction and you kind of go, wow, my body has an amazing capacity and it brings a lot of satisfaction to me, even though if that's that's a double-edged sword because then when you're injured or you can't actually do something, it's really depressing.
00:05:07
Speaker
so That's fine. It's fine. I need to work on my pride in that, but the Lord uses it and he is gracious. So that's good. I love that for you. Like you're explaining it and I'm like, yes, yes. And I was like, I could get into running. And then I'm like, I can't run. I've like made peace with this.
00:05:25
Speaker
I have hypermobility. I was like, it's bad for me to run. i need to whatever build muscle, but that's another conversation. You know, it doesn't even have to be running. i sometimes swim and I'm like,
00:05:37
Speaker
Actually, i could kind of feel like I'm drowning, but that's okay. I'm okay. I didn i did swim for a while. I needed quiet. i I did swim for a bit, but I didn't, like, I didn't love the swimming, but I loved having swum.
00:05:49
Speaker
That's how I feel about it. Look, that's the the satisfaction you get and afterwards. It's just the completion satisfaction. Okay. Nice.
Journey to Christianity
00:05:58
Speaker
Now, Maddie, tell me, how did you become a Christian?
00:06:04
Speaker
I became a Christian as a teenager. I grew up in a non-Christian home. And when I was about 15, my sister had started engaging with kind of friends who were Christian and going to church.
00:06:16
Speaker
My brother's best friend had graduated and decided to train as a minister instead of going to uni. And so when he did his first sermon, he invited my brother along and dragged my sister because my sister knew a few people at the church.
00:06:32
Speaker
And then Eventually she became a Christian and then i like she dragged me along with the promise of free food boot after church. That was great. And so i kind of came along to church. So through him evangelising my brother, ah he kind of reached the sisters instead.
00:06:54
Speaker
Sadly, my sister no longer walks with the Lord, but but we've been really, you know, i think it was just an amazing way that God did use various connections to kind of reach me with the gospel and expose me to its message.
00:07:07
Speaker
But love how he just kind of comes to find you where you're like, I wasn't looking for you, but you look back and find all these ways that he's come to find you. Absolutely. You know, it's you think, yeah, would I have got there on my own?
00:07:23
Speaker
No, I'd probably just have ended up in kind of pit of despair because it was a ah ah challenging season of my life where was really struggling at high school.
00:07:34
Speaker
I was quite academic, but I was having a hard time with my own self-esteem and, you know, puberty is hard for but you Girls, guys, puberty is just not a fun time.
00:07:46
Speaker
But I was going through a really hard time, struggling with friends, struggling um with my own self-esteem. And I kind of went through a period of ah depression in that time.
00:07:57
Speaker
And, you know, I was exposed to the gospel message and the idea of, I've always been exposed to the idea of God. My mum had always thought, you know, kind of been open to spirituality. She'd taken me to Baha'i classes and it was kind of exposing me to prayer in that way. And sometimes we had the, she'd open, be quite open to things like, you know, the positive thoughts, the universe, you know, put your thoughts out of the universe.
00:08:25
Speaker
And it was, so I was kind of open to spirituality, but there was, but my, on my dad's side, they were all atheists. So, you know, just completely against anything. Yeah, quite anti. Any idea.
00:08:36
Speaker
Oh, yeah, it was quite polar. And I guess mum's views always felt just that little bit empty, you know, you just slightly unsatisfying. There's a spiritual element, but ah you put your thoughts out to the universe or, ah you know, pray to this God that felt so distant.
00:08:55
Speaker
And in my mind, if there is a God out there, there is there is no way that he would love me They kept saying, God loves you. And I would say, i just thought there's no way that he would love me because and I really struggle with those ideas of being unlovable.
00:09:14
Speaker
and And then I kind of learned... that it wasn't he wasn't a distant God. I was learning about Jesus. And I felt like every time someone explained the Christian faith to me, they just left out Jesus.
00:09:27
Speaker
and sorry Or, like, you know, often I was learning about Christianity from other people who thought they understood it, so it wasn't really from Christians. so yeah Yeah, like the second-hand understanding of it.
00:09:41
Speaker
Yeah, and they just go, oh, yeah they just live really good lives or, you know, they go to church week and they're not allowed to have sex outside marriage and they're not allowed to do this. And so actually going to church and then learning about Jesus and what God did through his son and and who Jesus was, what he did for us, and the idea that God's love was not actually has never been conditional. It's never been about me being unlovable because I kind of am unlovable because I'm affected by sin, you know.
00:10:16
Speaker
Yeah. And it is kind of a reality picture where I suddenly learned about God's grace. and sorry Yeah, no matter how much. hadn't learned about Jesus. Yeah.
00:10:27
Speaker
Like, yeah, no matter how hard you work, you've always got that sense of it's never quite good enough and the gospel is like, well, yeah, but also that doesn't disqualify you. There's still that.
00:10:39
Speaker
that unconditional love, like you never needed to do that. You never needed to work at it because you could never do it. Yeah, and I felt like if there was ever, you know, if Christianity did have an element of like you need to ah you you need to live to this standard, I just knew I would never live up to that.
00:10:58
Speaker
i knew I kind of knew my own shortcomings and, you know, some of that was just where my mental headspace was at the time. But the Lord just really revealed to me that, yeah,
00:11:10
Speaker
you know Yeah, you do stuff up. It doesn't negate my love for you. And here's here's how I can show you and here's Jesus. And and it was just one of those things where I was completely baffled and it took me a little while because I knew that I would have to give up certain freedoms i thought I had.
00:11:27
Speaker
Yeah. Which now I'm like really glad that I gave that, you know, that I have these wonderful, you know, like ah guidelines for life through Christianity. And I'm really just grateful for how the Lord has guided my life.
00:11:42
Speaker
And I guess the other thing was just God's people. You know, high school is full of slightly spiteful relationships or like someone hurting someone else and then, you know getting grumpy. And then I was at church and and there were all these unlikely friends hanging out and actually showing grace towards one another, even though, you know, one person could sometimes be a bit insensitive or a bit...
00:12:04
Speaker
full on or something like that, that they were spending time together, constantly forgiving one another, constantly having grace for one another. And there was no kind of behind the scenes gossip or but it was it was the people of God. i just It made me realise that there was some authenticity to the gospel message.
00:12:23
Speaker
And then God's work in my life reallylight made me realise it was also true. So... Yeah. I love that, like, comparison to your mum's faith. There's an openness to it, but there's an emptiness. Like, we' I'm open to something, but I don't know what it is. And yet, like, in the person of Christ, you're like, oh, actually, this is a person and he loves me.
00:12:42
Speaker
But also I love the shift of, like, not that the church were perfect or they were trying you know what mean, to make rules fit. But that you did get to see people genuinely like gentle, kind, like you said, like forgiving. I think those those two things are really beautiful together, how they fit.
00:13:01
Speaker
i You know, in our current culture, it's like that person's a little bit hard to get along with. Let's just push them away, you know. and it's actually um But in the in the church we're going, oh, that person is hard, but God calls me to love them.
00:13:15
Speaker
and to get get beside them walk beside them and to consider that they're not a perfect human being and neither am i and i think that's just really yeah i think that's a striking way to live compared to our culture which just avoids tricky relationships and tricky scenarios yeah just cut off chocolate people oh yeah yeah never change them yeah No, not that we're changing them, but trust that God can work in your heart because sometimes you know being angsty at people is your own problem, not just theirs, but also they are a c sinner too. So, yeah, it opened my eyes a lot.
00:13:57
Speaker
It's kind of like, yeah, that's God's people. Is there anyone specifically who's really encouraged you or inspired you in your Christian walk and why?
Spiritual Growth and Mentorship
00:14:06
Speaker
The person I wanted to probably mention the most is just my husband, Robbie, was that he had grown up in a Christian home. And, you know, in his teenage years, he you know struggled a little bit with taking Christianity on as his own. But when he did, when I knew him and we were in a Bible study together and had no interest in one another at all, but then kind of, you know, grew a really lovely friendship was that He was the first to kind of expose me to the idea that I could actually challenge what I was taught.
00:14:39
Speaker
So as a baby Christian coming in, not knowing anything about the Bible, kind of accepted what I was told. Yeah, so being exposed to wet the way that Robbie would think about things is he would listen to something and he'd really weigh it up against the Bible.
00:14:52
Speaker
And it made me aware of how... kind of how little I knew of the Bible, because I would just accept things. You know, someone would teach from a passage and they said, yeah, this is what Jesus means. And this is what he's saying. And this is what how we should apply it.
00:15:07
Speaker
And Jesus would, and you know, Robbie would sometimes say, I'm not sure about that because in another passage of scripture it says this and and then he'd go investigate and he was very open to being corrected.
00:15:19
Speaker
know He would say, oh, you know, he is right. like But he was... Yes, he wasn't there for a fight or to like prove people wrong like, you know. Yeah. He was just a Christian trying to live according to God's word, trying to pursue Jesus.
00:15:37
Speaker
in the way that he, that, you know, God asks us to and the way that God actually speaks to us is through his word. And so he was trying to learn from from scripture and learn how we can live as Christians to honour him.
00:15:53
Speaker
And, yeah, so as in honour God, not ourselves. Yeah.
00:15:59
Speaker
So it him actually being able to challenge and actually seeking scripture a lot more for himself rather than was such a contrast to me kind reading scripture, not understanding and just trying to passively absorb through other people's understanding.
00:16:14
Speaker
and It gave me, it exposed me to, um and it grew in me a real desire to know the Lord more for myself and be able to understand his word more so that I could make sure that I i i was on the right track.
00:16:29
Speaker
make sure that I could. Because, you know, Jesus defends his ministry against Satan with scripture and that's the armour that we get and that and that his his word is is is the weapons that we're given against against the enemy in this world and against all the different temptations that we have and the cultural ideas that go against what Christ wants for us.
00:16:53
Speaker
So, yeah, it really challenged me and made me think, wow, I really need to learn more about this and and grow in my faith as I, through the word, not just through listening to podcasts and listening to all these other things and taking everyone else's word.
00:17:10
Speaker
I think that's really interesting in terms of the way like that you grew up. If there's also a lot of people who are atheists, like you said, a lot of what you had heard about Christianity was secondhand.
00:17:21
Speaker
So i love that as you've gone along in faith, you're like, oh, I could read this for myself. I could understand it. God will help me. Other people will help me. But I can go away and really think about this and be like, do I do i believe this?
00:17:34
Speaker
this this Is this what God is like? ah Yeah, and I think that's... It actually drew drove me even more to want to go to Bible college and learn more about scripture so that I was equipped not just for my own faith, but for encouraging others who were struggling like I was.
00:17:49
Speaker
You know, when people were asking the hard questions, I didn't have the capacity to answer them. So Robbie's been really influential in that. and And another couple that have been huge in our lives is just Steve and Jill McAlpine. They've just walked through a lot of seasons with us. They mentored us before marriage. Yeah.
00:18:06
Speaker
They came beside us through some really, really difficult times. I worked with Steve for a little bit and just they just took us under their wing and were real like spiritual parents for us, um which was just really beautiful. So I'm just ever grateful for them and their ministry just I could say more about them, but i' I'll leave it at that.
00:18:29
Speaker
I love that. I just love that it's, the everydayness of it like the church becomes family these people really feel like parents and they have just kind of I know that the term do do life together is like overused but I can't think of a better term for it like it's it's like the real meaning of of what fellowship is we throw that term around right and we're just like I'm catching up for coffee and we're doing fellowships And you're like, no, actually, fellowship is when we actually we work together in order to live as Christians and to honour the Lord and we encourage one another.
00:19:07
Speaker
And it was that was just what, like, a kind of a foundation that Steve and Jill provided. So, yeah, we're just so blessed by their ministry and by just their friendship. Oh, that's so beautiful.
00:19:19
Speaker
Okay, so yeah kind of alluded to before, but what's something that's God taught you through a hard season or suffering that, like, you don't think you would have learned otherwise?
Coping with Molar Pregnancy
00:19:29
Speaker
Earlier last year, it we we had a kind of like we'd really struggled to um the idea that we might not be able to fall pregnant naturally for a long time. And we got surprised by a pregnancy at the beginning of the year. we were just really excited and just absolutely delighted then that that happened naturally. And then for my first son, I needed but just hormone induction because I wasn't ovulating.
00:19:57
Speaker
And so... This time, felt pregnant naturally, and it was such a blessing, and we were so excited. And then I just got sicker and sicker, and I just thought, hmm, I'm a bit sicker than last time, but, you know, i'm sure things are well. We went for our scan, and there was nothing. It was kind of... um they could They could see a sac, like a gestational sac, but they only see a mass and no heartbeat.
00:20:22
Speaker
And so, effectively, what had happened is there was no genetic material. and the the placental cells kind of went a bit haywire.
00:20:32
Speaker
And so it formed a mass. It's called a molar pregnancy. Oh. sorry Oh, they're quite serious. Yeah, one in every 1,000 births or something. But we knew other people who had actually gone through it, which kind of prepared us to be able to deal with it and know the consequences and things like that. But it was really challenging studying full-time, being...
00:20:56
Speaker
so sick, you know, because your hormones just go crazy when the certain little cells all grow. And so I was sleeping in the morning, sleeping in the afternoon. I had to get my mum to just look after her my son.
00:21:08
Speaker
and then I had to undergo procedure to get that all removed and it all happened very quickly. And it was just really devastating because we had such joy in you know, ah having fallen pregnant naturally. Mm-hmm.
00:21:25
Speaker
the hope that we'd had, it's like I'd fallen in love with that baby immediately. Yeah. like I just fell in love with it and had started making all these plans in my mind and had all these ideas about what the second half of the year would look like. And then I realised that there wasn't a baby there. I was so sick and all those dreams kind of got ripped away really suddenly.
00:21:49
Speaker
Yeah. And I know lots of people who've experience something like miscarriage or just like phantom pregnancies. that's It's really awful. and And it's really hard because it's so personal physically for so the woman.
00:22:05
Speaker
And, you know, so hard on on your body, but also on your your mental on emotional state and hormones driving you absolutely nuts. The Lord was really kind because, well, he's always kind.
00:22:17
Speaker
But I think it was amazing that I had just learned in my theology lecture about God's providence. And God's providence is not not just the idea of him giving us what we need, but that God governs all things, that he didn't just create things, but he created the world, he sustains it too.
00:22:37
Speaker
And so in in all all things work according to his good purpose. It's that kind of idea. Yeah. and even though that always sounds like a hollow thing to say to someone suffering, the whole idea was sometimes we can think of that as, yeah, but God, why why would you allow this thing to happen if for everything's in your your control?
00:22:58
Speaker
And yeah why would you go through this? why Why do I have to go through this suffering? e got providen like The doctrine of providence is actually a really, really pastoral and comforting doctrine because it reminds us that God is...
00:23:14
Speaker
That even though this world is corrupted by sin and the enemy continues to try and work against God's purposes and against, you know, and against his people, o and you know, the enemy never triumphs.
00:23:30
Speaker
God's plan will always come through. we will always, you know, we will we will suffer in this world and we're told that we would suffer. But God's providence doesn't make him and his governance of all things doesn't make him some far removed God that just sets things in motion, allows things to happen.
00:23:49
Speaker
But he it doesn't change the fact that he is God of grace. He's not just gracious. He is grace. He's not just loving. He is love.
00:24:00
Speaker
And so if everything still works out for his purpose, it can't not work for the love of his people and it can't not work for outside of his grace.
00:24:12
Speaker
So even though we have no idea why certain things happen and that we do still suffer the consequences of sin in a broken world, in our broken bodies, the consequences of the workings of the enemy, they will never triumph.
00:24:28
Speaker
And so I think that was just really comforting that even though i was going through this and this place of despair, i was just really struggling, I could still remember that You know, God never actually, he's never the perpetrator of sin. He doesn't necessarily, cause, he doesn't directly cause things to happen, like, the sinful things to happen to us, but he will never let it win.
00:24:54
Speaker
That will never be the last word. You know, one day there will be no tears, no crying, no pain, no sickness. And it was just it was just absolutely comforting knowing that God was always with me, that God's nature hasn't changed, that i would say yeah I would see comfort and the grief would get smaller as God's love helps me you know grow and and as I start to see joy in other things more, the grief would get smaller.
00:25:27
Speaker
So, yeah, that was just really comforting even though for a lot of people it's kind of, you know, you think that it wouldn't be that comforting but but but knowing that God's character never changes and that sin never wins. Yeah.
00:25:40
Speaker
is just yeah it brings such hope to those situations so yeah it's like a rock there's something to hold on to you're like my my circumstances may change this beautiful thing that brings me so much joy and hope like things may leave or go or change and yet god is the same his character is unchanging so i love that yeah you're like i can bring my grief like you were saying before, to a person, you're like, I can bring my grief and all of that. Like it's not that it's gone away, but I like how you kind of explained it getting smaller. It's folding down and I'm holding it and it will be grief, but I feel held there yeah with these unchanging things.
00:26:24
Speaker
and And God meets us in our grief and he doesn't, you know, we're not all going to be hopeful and joyful all the time and we're not always going to be trusting and without doubts all the time because that was a big season of doubt for both Robbie and I and we yeah and but the but God actually also gives us the words and the means of approaching him in that you know he gives us psalms, laments, all of these things that, you know, I felt like I just didn't have words to speak to. And so I was just reading psalms because, you know, the psalms of those and um are those ways which people would just acknowledge their own shortcoming, their own shortcoming they in sin, and just their feeling of deep grief and despair. And yet there's always this turn to trust.
00:27:10
Speaker
They but I know your character's not changing. Help me to trust you because I just don't feel it right now. I feel like you've left me here. and it's And so it gives you the words. And that's also where I got that I read a little while ago is really about lamenting called Dark Clouds, Deep Mercy.
00:27:29
Speaker
And it just helps you pray through that. It's a good one. It's a really good one. So that was really helpful in that time. And if I hadn't have gone through that season, What I'd learnt in that theology class would never really have consolidated quite so firmly. Yes.
00:27:47
Speaker
it's Like it's translated, like you learn things along the way and you logically know them. remember Rory Shana talking about preparing to suffer well, and there's a word for it.
00:27:58
Speaker
But, you know, all of those, like, understanding of, like, who God is. But it's interesting that, like, then when you suffer, like, you go through those things and you're like, oh, this this is the thing to cling to, like, you know, in the Psalms where they're like, how long, oh Lord, I can't worship you from the grave. They just come to him with everything. Like the Psalms are just stunning. They're just so raw.
00:28:19
Speaker
mean, Jesus calls out, my God, my God, why he why have you forsaken me? And he the outcome as well. you know, he knew the outcome that he would die, but he would be raised. And so, yeah you know, it's just this period of suffering and Yeah, I think like they're like lifeboats when you get thrown into the sea and then you're like, oh, yeah, I'm floating a little bit and then you get reeled back in a little bit. And so, yeah, yeah, I think that's that's kind of how I felt at the time.
00:28:48
Speaker
and love that. It's almost like the theme of this whole interview it is almost like that that sense of a rock where, you know, he's not a God who can't be known. It's not a universe that's unknown.
00:29:00
Speaker
ah It's a God that you you can know with your mind to like, you can know him firsthand through his word, but I love that even like in the season of suffering, like that's the thing that you cling to. You cling more deeply to his character and who he is.
00:29:16
Speaker
But God is unchanging. We may change, but he doesn't. That's really cool. Our situations always want us to doubt it. And the suffering we go through, they always want us to doubt God. That's what the the world and sin would and the enemy would tempt us to be doing.
00:29:30
Speaker
But when we're equipped with some lifeboats in the word, we remember who God is. We have to remember who who is God. hes He is love.
00:29:41
Speaker
He is grace. He is the creator and sustainer of everyone and everything. And I think they're just the rocks you've got cling to. love that.
Encouragement for Women in Grief
00:29:51
Speaker
So what is a word of encouragement you can offer to a woman listening who might be walking through like a similar season of, say, grief or doubt or loss?
00:30:00
Speaker
I read ah another book that I just finished. It took me forever to read, but it was just When the Noise Won't Stop by Paul Grimmond. And it's a book about, it's actually a book about anxiety and dare to deal with anxiety as a Christian.
00:30:12
Speaker
And one of the things that he reminded me was this season is not forever. This season will pass that just as I was able to be encouraged by someone that my grief would get smaller, it would still be there. And there some days where it felt like it was a really heavy, heavy load I was carrying.
00:30:36
Speaker
There were some days where I could feel joy, even if it was, you know, I had one hand on the grief, but I had another hand where my son was just making me laugh and I just and felt such joy in those. The grief and the suffering...
00:30:48
Speaker
There is an end to it. And that's the hope that we have in the resurrection, that Christ was raised two to show us that there was more to come, that death is not the end, that this world is not the end, but he has promised us a new hope and a new future, and new creation.
00:31:10
Speaker
And so this season... You know, we can be reminded that the season of grief that we're going through, that our friends are going through, that other people, if they're in a season at the moment, the that God is with you and this season's not going to last forever. forever It will be really hard.
00:31:31
Speaker
um But know that you can actually trust in God because he is good. I think of of in Genesis, Joseph was constantly moved by slave traders he was a prisoner for years and years forgotten and yet had a greater a greater plan in that that through other people's sin and even joseph said through to his brothers he says through you trying to be um you trying to bring me down and yeah you intended this evil yeah you intended it for evil
00:32:02
Speaker
But God intended good out of it. God put good. And so we we we don't want to be doubting God's goodness in that. It's okay to have doubts. Just, you know, share it with other people.
00:32:14
Speaker
Ask God in prayer and know that this season will end because it will. And your grief gets a little bit easier to carry every day. and Make sure that you're talking to people and praying with people because when you articulate grief, and it took me a while to articulate just what we went through with a molar pregnancy. I just felt like I couldn't i couldn't verbally articulate it.
00:32:36
Speaker
But when you actually do, it's like its power gets smaller and it feels like someone else is carrying it with you. And I think that's why God also gives us church and community. So don't give up on meeting with people and um and know that we have a hope in the future that this time is not forever.
00:32:55
Speaker
So... That's what I would want to encourage any other women who are listening who are just really struggling in this season. Yeah. hope that can encourage them. I love that.
00:33:07
Speaker
Yeah. Sin says, like, this situation will never change, but I love the truth that you brought to that. So who would you nominate for this next?
00:33:19
Speaker
Yeah, my very first person is that I would think of that I've been so deeply encouraged by yes Sarah Michael, who I've met through college. And she's she's absolutely wonderful.
00:33:31
Speaker
And she's been so encouraging just because she is a servant-hearted person who has had to live through lots of struggles and trials and yet constantly wants to honour the Lord and really does live in such a way to serve others.
00:33:47
Speaker
and so gone and so i hope that she agrees to be interviewed she might be annoyed at me for the nominating but it's also very gracious and kind so if she's willing to come on the podcast i really do hope that others can be encouraged as i definitely have been encouraged oh i hope so i really ah really enjoy zara she's great yeah she's a gem she really is Okay, well, let's wrap it up there. So, guys, if you have enjoyed what you've heard, you can sign up to our newsletter to get honest stories like this through podcasts, through essays and poetry every Wednesday from local Christian women, and the link is in the show notes.
00:34:25
Speaker
Have a lovely day.