Intro
Opening Reflections
00:00:38
Jerome Hollomon
Hey everyone, welcome back to another episode of Gather Them podcast. I'm your host Jerome, and we're back for another episode. It's been such a draining month, but I'm so glad we're here. um I feel like my brain is like, I don't even know where to begin. I don't even have a script for this week, so I'm gonna be so honest. I might not even be here that long. Like we literally are probably gonna be here for like 30 minutes, like not even. It's been a fucking lot. like Lately, so if you listen to the last week's episode and my contact is also this is also why you're gonna know that it's literally gonna be time for me to go because my contact is bothering me and I'm like I I can't this is where I'm at But
00:01:26
Jerome Hollomon
ah I mean, if you listen to last week's episode, you you heard about what my brother's passing. So I'm still dealing with that. I'm still dealing with work and, you know, things are still chaotic. And it's interesting about the election, like the whole thing, how that happened. And it feels almost like, I mean, folks are, you know, of course revolutionizing or like trying to figure out things, but it feels almost like there's this collective shock that like,
00:01:56
Jerome Hollomon
everyone feels kind of paralyzed or like trapped in the system.
Balancing Self-Care and Support
00:02:02
Jerome Hollomon
And it's almost like, I don't know. I just, I'm tired. I hate being like a person that's in the in-between. Like I acknowledge like having that power to like lift people up. But sometimes I just be like, and that'd be like my villain era side. I'd be like, I just want to save myself. But then I'd be like,
00:02:26
Jerome Hollomon
No, actually you should do something good for humanity, I guess, and my try to help people. But it's hard when you be trying to do both. like And I think I'm starting to get to the point where I'm like, yeah, I really need to just start putting me first in a lot of situations.
Coping with Personal Loss
00:02:41
Jerome Hollomon
um And so recently I realized I was like, I need to move because i after my brother passed, I think I was just kind of like,
00:02:54
Jerome Hollomon
and Whoa, nit what now? Like, you know what I mean? Like, literally Azealia Banks, where she was like, so girl, what's going on? like what you know And it's like every time I feel like I am like moving a little bit further away from the event, it's almost like things just keep happening to pull me back in.
00:03:24
Jerome Hollomon
um And I'm working through that. I'm like working through like some of the frustration or some of the like sadness and and things like that. So it's just been really important for me to like really take some time, breathe, decompress. Sometimes I just go on a little angry fit and I just be like, you know what?
00:03:45
Jerome Hollomon
I need got to go to bed or I need to eat and then ah w that's the thing. But see, I think my problem has become now I don't like getting trapped in because I'm the kind of person where I don't know like there's times when I can pull myself out of like being into games or being into like movies and this and that and the
Disconnecting from Overwhelm
00:04:05
Jerome Hollomon
other. But at the same time, I just feel like there's so much happening and it's like I can't really even I don't even want to distract myself because it feels so pressing um and so I think i'm I'm now thinking of ways of like well what are ways that I can like check out that are not going to allow me to
00:04:31
Jerome Hollomon
be as like maybe tapped in. um And some of it is like, I just turned my phone off today at work. Cause I was just like, I can't do this. Like I can't, like even with the fact that like you can do the, what is it? The D and D mode and like all of that. It's like the fact that like you still have to, I mean, you still have to ex exist have a online presence if you're trying to build a community or if you're trying to like do private practice stuff and, um,
00:05:00
Jerome Hollomon
Then there's still life, like you just have to do life stuff.
Minimalism and Technology
00:05:03
Jerome Hollomon
And it's like, well, when do you ever have time to do that? So now I'm also eating right now. Like, fuck it. Like I don't really give a fuck. Um, you know, we had a president elect that, you know, I mean, everybody's doing everything that they want to do. I'll just say it that way. And so I guess I could do everything, anything that I want to do. Right. So I'm eating some on.
00:05:29
Jerome Hollomon
Sponsored Mexican takeout. Yeah, that's where we're at um What else has been going on so yeah, so I mean I'm gonna I'm doing a move which is like I am looking forward to that being over like I I I hate moving. Oh my God. Like the fact that, and this is something that's been coming up for me and and just the idea of moving is like stuff, like what's important and what's not. Like I feel like, especially when I'm renting a space, I'm someone that's like very practical of like, this is how much space I have. Like I know I'm not going to be here forever and you know, XYZ. And it's like growing up in a house where you're like,
00:06:18
Jerome Hollomon
literally like you've lived here or lived there for since you were like a kid or like high school or whatever it's like this is a whole fucking house like this is a lot to think about so um when I put it into perspective I was like well I could always just like throw everything out and just or sell everything and just make everything um my own, ah or like, you know, going to the future, like having like my own things. And so I was like, yeah, that's a good point. And then I like the new technological advances and stuff. I like the fact that a lot of things are multifunctional. I like having, when I love when a TV, for example, I love when a TV can connect to the Bluetooth, the speakers,
00:07:08
Jerome Hollomon
um or the I guess the sound bar, the Bluetooth on your phone or whatever. um that you can just kind of like play a video from your phone on your TV. Like I like that stuff because I'm the kind of person where I like to maximize my space and in that way. So if I'm like cooking, I like having the TV on so that I can kind of watch or get an ID or have something I'm familiar with in the background. So it's not as like miserable, you know,
Stress Patterns and Mental Exhaustion
00:07:39
Jerome Hollomon
where you do the thing.
00:07:40
Jerome Hollomon
um And so yeah, I feel like I am in a period where I'm just being forced um by the universe, I guess, to do nothing or just do stuff that's like, I don't know, that disconnects me in a way. Cause it's a lot of stuff like in the world right now. And I'm like, yikes. The fact that like,
00:08:11
Jerome Hollomon
people have to like clean it up, it's crazy. like um And I think it's also around the holidays. I don't know why we have a major election around the holidays. It just sours everything. Like why would you do that? Like that doesn't make sense. um But anyway, ah past the election, like once this move and stuff is done, I guess, I feel in a better head
College Struggles and Imposter Syndrome
00:08:33
Jerome Hollomon
space. I just feel like really exhausted, like mentally with having to,
00:08:41
Jerome Hollomon
just still figure out okay like having multiple things like piled on top of each other that's like the thing that's really a lot to me and so yeah but it'll work out it's just ah getting through this part the fall interestingly enough i talked to like sometimes clients about this but like interestingly enough um Patterns are things that I recognize in my life and they always help give me some information about um You know what's going on, but this feels like a pattern that's like that don't even make sense like usually it feels for me Like the fall time is the time when things start to get chaotic. I remember there were years where I could vividly remember
00:09:29
Jerome Hollomon
um Like when I went to Penn State, am I undergrad? And was it my sophomore year? I i was i started working at a on-campus dining. I fell off from the gym like so bad, but um I needed to work cuz you know, you go to expensive school out, you know in the middle of nowhere then you kind of to figure it out, but My pencil isn't expensive. It's just like It's expensive. Fuck it. like I gotta give a fuck College is overly priced, you know, you can just kind of find this stuff out on your own now and
00:10:14
Jerome Hollomon
Yeah, so you go to this expensive school, you're figuring you're trying to figure out like, well, what the fuck? Like, you know, you are 20 something, you don't know anything about money and this, that and the other. And so I remember my laptop, like literally, oh my God. And that was like the thing like that stressed me out the most was the fact that um it was like a series of unfortunate events that was happening. And I was like, still trying to learn my job. And, you know, I um i think was having imposter syndrome because I was feeling like,
00:10:45
Jerome Hollomon
not imposter syndrome in a way in which I felt like I couldn't do it, but in a way in which like, this isn't like, I don't even, I don't want to do this job. Like this is just the job I have. And so I feel like this doesn't feel right. It's just a job. And, uh,
00:11:03
Jerome Hollomon
I remember my camera but broke, which was also a big deal for me at the time, because I wanted to take photography. But I forget if I took it that semester or a different one. um But I wanted to take a photography class, and I wanted to um just do all these things. And then things got better for me in the spring. um I do remember that. But there's been like patterns like that where I'm like, oh, yeah, around this time, there' been kind of wild for me when I think about it, but things often get better in the spring once I have adjusted. um But I'm just tired of adjusting. I'm like, so like, ugh, can we just pull the plug on my adjusting and just be, I guess. um And it's different. It feels like very different, I think, to me, though, too, because of just how even like the systems, like not even just the election, but as I said, I went
00:11:58
Jerome Hollomon
Like I was talking to my coworkers about this, but like I was on public transportation This week and I don't want to say why I'm eating but I was stuck to something that was like either diarrhea or vomit and I want it to fucking Like I would have I don't know what I would have did that would have been my 13th reason probably um I'm not gonna lie It was a very Very disgusting puddle. I and it was crazy because I caught myself It was like my reflexes where I was walking down steps and you know how when you're walking down the steps you sometimes can't see the bottom the step like Coming after it. And so it was one of those like situations where it was so far down that I didn't see it and I was I running trying to catch the the trolley and then next thing no, it's like
00:12:47
Jerome Hollomon
Paula vomit and then I remember I got off at this stop before and there was a pile of shit like the sloshiest most disgusting like literally like someone just Couldn't even like all the pee and poop just like mixed together disgusting. Yes um And that's literally what I like see regularly and I'm just like this is like what the fuck ah um, I was talking to a co-worker today I was like I Girl, we ain't never seen no shit like this before in Philly. Like, this is bad. And of course, like, Septa is threatening to strike, which, honestly, when I think about it, I'm like, they have every right to. I mean, it's not safe.
00:13:30
Jerome Hollomon
um to be on public transit, and you're actually risking your life um pretty significantly by being on public transit. So I fully support whatever they you know decide to do. um I mean, it is what it is, because it's like you can't you know play around with people's safety and just expect that like everybody's just going to be OK with that. so um
00:14:02
Jerome Hollomon
I just want to make it just clear, like, you know...
Public Transport Woes and Light Moments
00:14:06
Jerome Hollomon
my like me having my experience with like that is like minuscule and the sense of like the bigger problem but it's almost like I see the ways in which the system is like falling apart like right before our eyes and I was talking to my friend um Alyssa about this on Instagram um via DMs and we're just like it's like a glitch in the matrix or something because oh my god that one guy Blanco Bunny or
00:14:35
Jerome Hollomon
Bunny Blanco, I don't know, but he's like the sexiest man alive. And I'm like, who are you? Like, I don't even know. Who are you? um And it was funny because I was talking to another one of my followers and she was saying that the sexiest man should have been a woman. And I'm like, that actually would have been really tea because when you think about it, right? When you think about it, you think about the fact that like women have dominated 2024. So, um,
00:15:02
Jerome Hollomon
I was like, that would have been really tea or a really like good way to kind of end the madness. But I was just like, and I put, oh my God, and just to not shade it and get a fucking Grammy nomination. And I was like, all I wanted was one. Like I just wanted one nomination. Like I did not want, you know, she didn't have to win or anything. And I was just like, yup. It's just time for me to just turn this phone off. So I would be so happy to do that.
00:15:31
Jerome Hollomon
um Looking very much forward today. I have to pull up the outline which I said there's not really much of an outline Oh, i've also been something I will talk about later on but I've been learning about uh cryptocurrency um a lot and some of this like stuff and I just Find it so interesting. I won't I mean guys. I won't talk too much about it, but kind of sort of in a cult um Yeah, ask me about it if you if you want Uh, let me just see. Sorry. I don't even got the outline up. That's crazy. Like, how do I just, how am I even functioning right now? And then I don't like sometimes with, um, do
00:16:18
Jerome Hollomon
with the fact that like I have a lot of thoughts during the day, all my notes end up getting lost or like, I'm not being notified. I'm like, why can't I find this? Oh, here we go. Um, but yeah.
00:16:33
Jerome Hollomon
I did want to say, okay, so we're actually moving along pretty well. I gave you guys some umm catching up. That was was we were our goal. Yep. Election gave you a little bit, not too much.
00:16:53
Jerome Hollomon
um oh Which I can talk about that shit now because I think I said maybe I said before I couldn't talk about it But I do I'm not working that night and I was just like fuck it I guess I i can talk about it now. I just can't talk about it in the office, which oh God I hate this system. I'm in the way things work um The rest of my October Was good Something really fun that I did
00:17:26
Jerome Hollomon
Reflecting was I didn't have any plans on Halloween and I actually ended up going to a Going to South Street, which is like about Bainbridge, but it's South Street essentially, but It's kind of watching sitting there and watching like people in their Halloween costumes. That was really fun um and Yeah. And then after that, uh, the weekend came and like flew by and it was almost like you didn't even really remember that it was, um, you didn't really, I remember it was like October, just like a couple of weeks ago. Uh, and then, um, went to the melting pot, my sister, which was fine. Uh, which they had a vegan restaurant week, which was really cool there.
00:18:22
Jerome Hollomon
And I've been training on going to like different classes. um I was supposed to do cycling last week, but I didn't do it. And, but I did a, it was like a body pump class, which is, if you've ever done, it's like a high repetition workout, but low weights. So you do a lot of reps um and it's wild because you think like, Oh, like,
00:18:47
Jerome Hollomon
5 pounds here 2.5 pounds there. It's like no it really like after you start really working It really starts that you feel it like it adds up um That's one of my like I like going to that class when I feel like if I can't go, you know See my trainer or whatever then I like going so that I can still feel like I got a good workout in and it's only like 45 minutes so It's not even a full hour. Like I love it. Um, and then I was going to go to spin class, but I think I was like girl like, I'm tired. Um, which is like, you know, fine. Yeah. Then November, I feel like it's just been a lot of the same. The next couple of weeks will be interesting. Um, because of the holidays and moving, of course. But like, I also feel like,
00:19:40
Jerome Hollomon
this transition with the seasonal effective ah transition has it's like really hit
Seasonal Affective Disorder Challenges
00:19:47
Jerome Hollomon
me. like I'm the kind of person where um i I struggle with it. I don't know if anyone else struggles with it or at least struggles with it right off because it feels like immediate. like I just know it. like I notice it.
00:20:03
Jerome Hollomon
ah Feel it. It's the shift. It's the you know, I feel like my body is like so tired um and it's falling apart off the hinges so but ah Usually like midway like I'll say by the time Christmas is over. I'm usually like deep enough into it in New Year's I'm pretty much deep enough into attempt like accepted it and oftentimes at that point I'm good but um oh I did want to move into the media corner which my media corner which I don't have much to talk about but I just been feeling like ah Quantum baby has been living rent free in my head um Production like everything about it like when I hear this project and I think about baby angel I'm like I keep hearing stuff that I didn't hear before or it's like Synchronicities or things that are just coming up that I'm not
00:21:01
Jerome Hollomon
that I am maybe thinking about in the back of my mind or I'm like
Music and Quantum Mechanics
00:21:06
Jerome Hollomon
connecting them. And I'm like, girl, what you doing over there? It sounds like a little bit of a little witchery over there. um and She's eating them up. And the lyrics are good too. And I love the idea of like,
00:21:20
Jerome Hollomon
This quantum mechanic stuff that we've been like talking about and the metaphysics and all of that behind it because Even though science says like oh, you know, we're not really sure like it's all theories. It's like well Isn't that kind of what people say about religion? like did i mean it's We don't really know you know because we can't test it, but um it's almost like you have to believe. um Just in the same ways, you would have to believe that like
00:21:52
Jerome Hollomon
Even though you went, you're going through a hard time, you'll get through another one. Like that's literally what it is. It's almost like you just have to have like this inner knowing or inner strength. And I, and just being very good with the flow and like trying on these different personalities, because I remember what was his name? Anthony, if I say this every time, Anthony Fantano, but I always forget his name because it's like not
00:22:18
Jerome Hollomon
who you would, I don't know, like, I just feel like he's more listening for something different than I am. And so I'm like, in my brain, like, you not you're not hearing that this is a project and that it's connecting and there's this really abstract thing that's happening. um And I think that that's, you know, some people are gonna get it and some people aren't. And that's kind of sort of what I felt about when I finally heard three, three, three, and I was like, oh, there should have been an album that got her hot.
00:22:48
Jerome Hollomon
I was like, oh, you really got to just kind of be tapped in um to it. um And then I also wanted to talk about the Addison Rae song, ah Diet Pepsi, and Delulu by Nisa? Nisha? I like that. ah I like that song. I really do like that song. First of all, I love the idea that like people are talking about being more delusional to get what they want or being like so like taken to the point of being like unhinged. that's like
00:23:28
Jerome Hollomon
my are do you like That's literally my self-concept. My self-concept is literally like, I am just taken to the edge. like that is what is so funny to me um about it. And the fact that um I love the synth beat. I love the a you know the gothic um feel of it. I kind of like that in a lot of these songs, like the synth part that gets added into it. I think that that's like really um there's a really cool kind like way to kind of innovate the new and old.
00:24:10
Jerome Hollomon
um And then also with Edison Ray's Diet Pepsi. I thought it was funny because I liked the song and I was like, I can't figure out why I liked the song. And then I thought about it and I was like, it does kind of sort of remind me of Lana Del Rey a little bit.
00:24:29
Jerome Hollomon
But it's still a good song. ah Nonetheless, I think that it's worth trying out some new music because you just never know what you're going to find. like I think people are very critical about a lot of these new artists not having um you know the like the music not being as good. Because I hear two arguments. i hear two One is that the art the music's not as good as it as people say it is. And then the other other argument is that like people don't pay homage.
00:24:59
Jerome Hollomon
um And in that, I think that both things are true. I think that some of these um younger artists do need to be a little bit more respectful, but at the same time, I also get like, you're not gonna kiss somebody's ass.
Originality in Music and Criticism
00:25:15
Jerome Hollomon
Like I get that. And I don't think that's what anyone's asking. Like people are just, they like to know like the story, I think. Like people like to know,
00:25:25
Jerome Hollomon
Like who inspired you? Like when I talk about stuff, I'd be like, Oh my God. Like that for Larry, I should have got me through some tough shit. Like Florence and machine got me through some tough shit.
00:25:36
Jerome Hollomon
um Tinashe got me through some tough shit. like And then just being able to, as an artist, articulate why, that is, um I think really resonates with people. And I think that that's what people maybe are looking for in that. um So just writing it off as like, oh, whatever. you know I just don't...
00:25:59
Jerome Hollomon
I just don't you know feel like whatever about this person or I feel like you know, whatever I'm not gonna just sit up here and just say oh my god You're my idol, especially the fact that when people do it so I mean a lot of people have gotten burned from that like a lot of People have gotten I mean Nicki Minaj, for example, like you kiss someone's ass and the next thing you know, you say one thing and it's like, well, now what? So I get it. Like I get why people don't do it. um I can't wait to get a new chair too. Like this is like really alive with this weekiness. I need to get some like WD-40 honestly.
00:26:37
Jerome Hollomon
um What else? But yeah, I love those songs. Those are two songs I've been listening to lately and I'm like, oh yeah, those songs are actually really good. And I feel like they're both very catchy, like they're very radio friendly songs that aren't, um we have to like, we're redefining, I feel like what radio friendly maybe sounds like in some ways, um because like I said, like, and I just want to, you know, I don't know anything about Addison Wright, but like, yeah, Lana Del Rey got played on the radio, but like,
00:27:10
Jerome Hollomon
had to remix her song first to like get I mean a remix summertime sadness which is like literally depressing a song um just for her to get a radio like get on the mainstream radio uh and so I feel like I don't know any like I said I don't really think about her so I don't know she's like you know fully like
00:27:35
Jerome Hollomon
but if She's tied into a label or like if she's writing her own music or I don't know anything like I really don't know and I kind of don't care And I feel like that just makes me kind of just like her a little bit um And people talk about oh well she's you know people are still in like all of these dances and blah blah blah blah blah and it's like I ah Can't fight every fight. I really can't I'm so sorry. I I'm like one person and if I didn't like somebody I like them, but If you tell me that they stole and I'll make sure I keep that in the back of my head But it's just like I can't hold space for People I don't know in that way if that makes sense um Because there's just so much going on. I don't know I don't even know this person like I don't know anything about this person
00:28:27
Jerome Hollomon
So I think she's like really cool like you're just in the sense of like wit like the song she's on like I love her own Von Dutch as well the remix like that was a That's a good ass song which is again. I don't understand why people don't like that song I need to listen to Megan's new album Maybe that's what I'll do over the next couple days is I'll listen to some new stuff that I haven't listened to I'm gonna try to watch some new movies to be maybe more tapped in ah But we'll see you know give him Give me something to talk about round me out a little bit um But yeah, that's basically
Cryptocurrency as Historic Parallel
00:29:03
Jerome Hollomon
it. um The only other thing like I said for the final thought I just wanted to talk really quickly about um Crypto stuff but something I'm finding like really interesting I think and it's almost like We're in this like moment in time where
00:29:24
Jerome Hollomon
Like it feels like we're living in another historical event because we are. And yet, I don't know, it feels like we're not like learning anything from these historical events that feels significant. Like at this point, everyone's just pointing fingers and not looking at the things that are right in front of their eyes.
00:29:49
Jerome Hollomon
and I feel like as I'm starting to dig a little deeper and I'm starting to unpack some of the ways in which like this isn't like the worst thing to ever happen like if
00:30:06
Jerome Hollomon
if like and this is a big if like if the gop does keep up their end of the bargain there is i can like see the way out in my like mind's eye and i can like see it see it see it and i'm like slowly trying to feed people like the information or try to give people little tidbits here and there it's just like have I guess I have to accept the fact that like people aren't ready. And that's like, wow. It's like being a social worker and just knowing that there's so many easier ways to do so do to do things and to make life, to almost like hum compartmentalize things a little bit, but there's just so much resistance.
Radical Social Work Approaches
00:30:56
Jerome Hollomon
And I'm like,
00:30:58
Jerome Hollomon
becoming way more radical, like I've already branded myself as like the cool social worker, the radical social worker. I am someone that's willing to push the needle forward.
00:31:11
Jerome Hollomon
um But I'm also just like... Girl, like I just want to get there. like I don't want to have to do this again. like I don't want to do the fighting for ah you know and marching. And I don't feel like it. like And I know black women don't feel like it. And they definitely, like I said before, I'm like, they definitely don't need to be doing that. It's just so ghetto around here. I don't know. We're going out of here.
Concluding Self-Care Advice
00:31:42
Jerome Hollomon
It's been 30 minutes. um Listen. sir
00:31:50
Jerome Hollomon
I would just say, take care of yourselves. Like I'm trying to do, accept what you cannot control. It's so hard. And the only thing that I can ever think of, or the thing that ever like grounds me back in it is the fact that yes, there are things that I can control. And I mean, a lot of those things are just,
00:32:18
Jerome Hollomon
the eating, sleeping, exercising, writing, meditating, taking mental space, um you know, talking about it in therapy, ah just trying to continue to the to fill in or but not fill in well,
00:32:45
Jerome Hollomon
Not that kind of, but to, you know, ah ah ah yeah to try to fill yourself back up, you know? Because I feel like that's all you really can do right now um is just fill yourself back up and ar just keep going. Yeah. i Just being consistent. So if you have any letters or, you know, listener letters, any.
00:33:10
Jerome Hollomon
Oh, God. My brain. we're We're going to get this together one day. I swear we're gonna get this together one day because I can't like, I'm so sick. Like having mental fatigue on stuff that you actually wanna do is crazy. Like I don't like feeling like that. That makes me feel uncomfortable, you know? It makes me feel uncomfortable to not feel like fully in my whatever.
00:33:40
Jerome Hollomon
We're already in here. um Gather them pod, gmail dot.com. Yeah, letter Gavin pod Instagram X formerly known as Twitter um Yeah, what else? This weekend, after tonight, I'm not doing shit. Like, I'm so serious. I have notes to do, but don't get done. And then work, um regular day work, you know, stuff. But other than that, I'm just like, my brain is just, I'm unplugging. That's it. um But I hope everyone's a good rest of the week. I plan to come back next week, because I would like to keep showing up.
00:34:22
Jerome Hollomon
trying to think, I always feel like there's always stuff I'm missing and it's rarely ever anything important. So I think that that's what I'm gonna do. um It's just kind of end and just, yeah, let that be it. But I'll talk to everyone next week and have a safe and, I don't know, grateful, thoughtful, insightful,
00:34:52
Jerome Hollomon
week. Yeah. Bye.
Outro