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S3E6 Who?! Friends & Egg Donors
90 Plays2 months ago
Summary
In this episode, I sit down with Jaleen and Shevaun to talk about their incredible journeys as egg donors. We dive into how they first discovered egg donation, what motivated them to give this amazing gift, and the emotional and physical aspects of being a donor. Throughout our chat, we highlight the crucial role of support—whether from family, friends, or agencies—as well as clear up some of the common misconceptions around egg donation. Plus, they offer insightful advice for anyone considering becoming a donor and discuss the lasting impact of their contributions. Jaleen and Shevaun also share the immense fulfillment they’ve found in helping families grow and reflect on the joy that comes from being part of such an important process.
Takeaways
Egg donation is a deeply rewarding experience.
Support from family and friends is crucial during the process.
Misconceptions about egg donation often stem from a lack of understanding.
The emotional impact of helping families is profound.
It's important to do thorough research before becoming a donor.
Communication with coordinators can ease anxiety about the process.
Hydration and self-care are essential during the donation process.
Each donor's journey is unique and should be respected.
The process can be straightforward with the right support.
Connecting with other donors can provide valuable insights.
Links
Recommended
Transcript
Introduction to Egg Donation
00:00:00
Speaker
Hi, everyone. I am so excited for today's conversation as we dive into the world of egg donation with two amazing women, Jaleen and Siobhan.
Egg Donation Journeys
00:00:13
Speaker
Jaleen has been a donor six times with Egg Donor and Surrogate Solutions, and at the time of this recording, Siobhan was preparing for her fourth cycle.
00:00:22
Speaker
With all that experience, Siobhan and Jaleen open up about their personal journey as egg donors, as well as giving us amazing advice. You will get to hear how they first learned about egg donation and the motivations that led them to becoming donors. But we also touch on the emotional and physical challenges that come with the process, really highlighting the importance of having a strong support system.
00:00:46
Speaker
Jaleen and Siobhan share some incredible insights into the joy and fulfillment they've experienced helping families grow. This was such a joy filled conversation. So if you've ever been curious about egg donation, are thinking about becoming a donor yourself, or just love hearing a great story, you won't want to miss this one. Enjoy.
Role of Surrogacy and Support
00:01:09
Speaker
Me, you and who?
00:01:11
Speaker
Who knew it would take more than two people to have a baby? In a world where infertility is no longer a taboo topic, this podcast will take you through all of the different aspects of surrogacy and egg donation through the lens of many who walk this journey in different ways. My name is Whitney Hall and I am a two-time Surrogate, now turned Surrogacy Coordinator for Egg Donor and Surrogate Solutions.
00:01:36
Speaker
the very agency I used when I chose to carry for two amazing families. With this podcast, it is our goal to help guide and support you as you learn about what it takes to grow a family in an alternative way, as well as hear inspiring and beautiful stories of how this path has changed lives forever. We can't wait for you to hear about just one more way happy families are created every day. Well, hey guys, thank you for Thank you for having us. Oh, I'm so excited. Okay. So for our listeners who are not watching this fantastic recording, why don't you guys go ahead and say your name so that they know who is who with the voice. Okay. All right. I'm Jolene.
00:02:27
Speaker
And I'm Siobhan. Yay. And you both have been egg donors.
Misconceptions and Discoveries
00:02:34
Speaker
Oh my goodness. I'm so excited. So okay. Tell me and like just jump in. How did egg donation, how did you even first hear about it? How did this become a thing?
00:02:45
Speaker
but It's kind of funny. Okay, so we I just this was her until like an hour ago. You like know each other and I didn't know this entire like we've had this plan for months and she reached out and she's like, Oh my god, we're gonna be on this podcast. And now they're I was like, it's you.
00:03:04
Speaker
Cause I know her name. Yeah. She calls me by my nickname and I go by Siobhan with like the egg donation stuff. So I was like, yeah, it's me. I can't believe we're going to do this in like an hour. real life.
00:03:24
Speaker
yeah But I had my first donation in 2020. And so I've done six since then. And I think I met her when I was in the midst of my third donation, I think. I can't remember. But she told me that she was interested in it before. And I was just like, anyone who wants to talk about it, I'm just like, I love talking about this. So I was just like, I'll tell you all about it. I'll tell you everything I go through. I'll give you everything you want to know.
00:03:54
Speaker
So I was like super passionate about it. And then when I got the email that a Siobhan signed up through me, I remember calling my coordinator and I was like, I don't know if that's right. I don't know what Siobhan or like, you know, like they used your name. I was like, okay.
00:04:12
Speaker
Wait, Siobhan, what's the nickname or can you share? It's May or May May. was so funny. Yeah, the night that we met, we um we met at like a party of a mutual friend.
00:04:34
Speaker
And I remember going and I was like, I only knew that one mutual friend and then she lean came and we we're the only two people not drinking. And she was like, Oh yeah, I'm an egg donor. And I was like, hold up.
00:04:47
Speaker
Let's go talk in the other room. I have so many questions and then we just really hit it off. I don't think I talked to anybody else at the party actually. Same because I was talking about it. I was like, I think this is what I came here to do. I was like, I'm going to show you. That is so funny. Oh my god. It was meant to happen. It was like Nick really brought all this together. So shout out Nick.
00:05:09
Speaker
Yeah, shout out to Nick. Way to go, Nick. Thank you. I love it. That's amazing. Okay, so Jaleen, how did a donation become even like a thing that was in your world? How and why did you like, how and why? My best friend Cassie, so she was in college and she was telling me like,
00:05:31
Speaker
She just heard it in passing. Like she was just heard about like egg donation and she was like, it's basically like a sperm donation. You walk in, you get your eggs and then they pay you and leave. And I was like, wow, quick money, you know? And so I had no idea even about it. So when I started looking it up, I was like, oh, this is like intense. Not quick money.
00:05:50
Speaker
um So I started looking it up and I started reading like stories and stuff of people who had to go through this and until like get to the point of having a parents having to go through egg donation or to you know, like it was always like this is actually serious. It's not like a quick buck thing, you know, so sure. Yeah, I took like months filling out my Profile and I went to I filled out for actually like multiple agencies because I was like, this is something I really want to dedicate the next few years to because I was like, I got really just passionate about it. Yeah. And so once I did my first one, I was like, and I heard that that those parents how I got pregnant, you know, I was like, so overwhelmed.
00:06:34
Speaker
But like, just really like, like pride. I was like, I did that.
Choosing the Right Agency
00:06:38
Speaker
Yeah. So after the first one, I was like, I think I'm gonna keep doing this until egg donations. They tell me I need to stop.
00:06:47
Speaker
ah but yeah I love that. That's amazing. So okay, going back just a little bit, you said that you, you had applied to um a couple of, you know, just different agencies. What made you ultimately decide that and general surrogate solutions was the best. And how did you, how was your experience? Well, the first time I remember, I still remember my first coordinator was Callie and I was obviously very nervous for my first donation. I had no idea what to expect. And like before I even had any questions, like Callie was like, boom, boom, boom, hit every single bullet point. She was like, you have nothing to be worried about, but here's my personal cell. You know, it's just like the communication was just so,
00:07:34
Speaker
helpful to get through that and I never felt like I didn't know what was going to happen or I didn't know what to expect and like it was just like it was like so much information that I knew exactly where I had to go to and then I think I had people reach out like other agencies reached out before and I was in the midst of doing a donation with it and like EDS. But then that was the second I'd be like, Hey, I can call you at this time and see if I can do it after that. And it was like no communication. I was like, Okay, like, yes, this is always just really like making sure I was comfortable and I was heard, you know, sure, the after you donate and they always like reach out or I guess you guys always reach out and you're like,
00:08:14
Speaker
um Is there anything that like they could have improved on or then how did the clinic do like hearing from me? Specifically like I wasn't just like done with you know It was just like I felt really like didn't care of and heard and I was just like I loved loved it loved you guys Good, good. Well, I mean, but you're doing a big thing. And I know a lot of times like when you, when I, I've heard from donors where you just, if you just work in a clinic, it's very, it is that you're in, you're out. It's, you know, it's pretty,
00:08:46
Speaker
your number, you know, sort of situation, but you're you're so much more than that. Oh my gosh, you're so much more than that. I think that shouldn't be your experience. No, that's amazing. Okay, so you caught the bug. You like you did your one and you were like, this is it. I'm doing it. How like, what was kind of the difference over the course of you know, just as as you were doing all of these,
00:09:10
Speaker
different um different donations. And then Siobhan, okay, you guys met in the middle of your third one, Jillian, right? I think so, yeah. Okay, okay. So how how have those been just like kind of looking back? Because you've done six, so you're you're retired.
00:09:29
Speaker
How has that been? Like, what was that matching process? Like, how did you feel about all of that? And then Siobhan, I want to hear from you just getting kind of some of this wisdom from Jolene. Like, how, how was that just getting, I mean, was she just your only research? Tell me all of the things.
00:09:45
Speaker
Well, I've always been interested in the idea of doing egg donations. um I was kind of introduced into fertility procedures kind of early on in my life through family members who have done IVF to have their children. um So I had just like done a lot of research about it and it was like the universe was calling.
00:10:08
Speaker
me to step up when I met Jaleen, and she told me all about it. And I was immediately like, okay, I'm gonna do this. And she spoke so highly of EDS. I was like, I don't even feel like I need to look into other agencies and stuff, because you guys just go above and beyond to making sure that everybody is like aware of the situation, you're educated, you know exactly what to expect, and you feel prepared and comfortable.
00:10:37
Speaker
And yeah, that just made the decision so easy. And as Jaleen was going on with hers, I started with mine. And Jaleen, I don't know if you remember, but I texted you. I was like, Oh my gosh, like I'm about to do my first procedure. Like I can't believe it. Conversations at that party. And now here I am like,
00:10:59
Speaker
what I do and you were like coconut water um my though like okay wait what's with the coconut water I got it now The hot like just hydrating and getting the electrolytes just good hydration. Yes. so Yes. I mean, that's the name of the game in life. But yes. Yeah. yeah especially with the procedural and I'm like get the big one and drink and yeah like every single day. Exactly. Exactly. Yeah, we kind of just went from there. And now I'm in my fourth.
00:11:40
Speaker
You're in your force right now. Yeah. Oh my gosh. Yeah, girl. I actually, I just got back from my first um initial visit like two days ago in Miami.
00:11:52
Speaker
in Miami. That's Yeah, this changed my life. Honestly. I love that. Okay, I want to hear a little bit more use. I mean, obviously, you're changing so many other people's lives just by you know, giving this amazing gift.
00:12:17
Speaker
But clearly, this is changing your life. um How did your partners feel about this? Jillian, I know you are engaged. But Siobhan, you were doing this while or you're married. How did your partners feel about
Support from Partners and Family
00:12:29
Speaker
this? Tell me more. He was 100% supportive of the whole process. um we got I got married three years ago. We actually just celebrated our three-year anniversary last week. Congratulations. Thank you. And when we got married, we had you know, sat and talked and made the decision that having children of our own would not be a part of our journey together. And so when I approached him with egg donation, he was like 100% like, I will support you. He also has a background in like, um medical assisting. So he helped me with the injections. He was there for me. He picked me up everywhere. Like it was, I feel so lucky to be so well supported by my partner. Absolutely. yeah and yeah's like All the freaking difference. It really does. Gabe and I first got together when I was in my second donation. or I think at the end of my first one.
00:13:29
Speaker
so we're like just started dating and I was like hey I'm also doing this egg donation thing and I told him like everything about it so I was like we want to really start doing this if we're going to take this any further you know like in 16 to 18 years our life might get a little crazy you know and when we first got together I was also I was like I didn't want kids and I also didn't want to get married either so I was like are you okay with that and he was cool with it at first and then like a year into us dating I was like you can propose whenever
00:14:04
Speaker
I love that. And then this past year, um I just I would like kind of changed my mind and I was like, I'll have a baby. So it's like, oh my gosh. Look at that. But it's amazing how you know, like you you are you're making decisions so early on and big decisions. And then, um, you know, like,
00:14:27
Speaker
You pivot, which is great. And that's so fantastic that just both of your partners are have been so supportive. I feel like that is, I mean, you have to have that when you're doing something big like this. How were kind of your family and friends as you guys were explaining like, hey, I'm doing this thing.
00:14:45
Speaker
i my parents were really scared because I was like it's just a minor surgery and they're like surgery you know sure and then hey I didn't know like I realized I didn't really know a lot about the female body until I started doing this you know because I was like we're born with all the eggs we're with you know and I was like we're losing 10 every month you know all of that and I didn't know so I was telling my dad I wanted to do this yeah and he was like He was like, oh, that's sad that you're getting rid of all your eggs. And I was like, wait. you know I was like, I'm not. you know So I had to end the whole process too, because I was like, did you know? you know ah like So my family went on board after they understood everything. But at first, they thought I was just like giving my ovaries away. Oh my gosh. It's amazing how much do.
00:15:37
Speaker
you You do have to educate so many whenever you're doing any sort you know of process like this. I can't tell you how many times this is surrogate. Someone looks at me and they're like, you know ah okay, so you're giving up your baby. And I was like, no, no, no, no. We have no genetic reaction. But it's it's so it's so interesting that people will make all of these assumptions and um and not understand. And so it's fantastic that, I mean, it gives you that opportunity um to explain for sure. What about you, Siobhan? How is kind of breaking that fun?
00:16:05
Speaker
My parents, when I like first brought the topic to them, they were also very scared because they did not understand anything. They were like, oh my God, you're giving away your babies. And I'm like, calm down. It's not like that.
00:16:19
Speaker
oh But I told them, I was like, well, I'm going to do this. so you know you can be supportive or not and they were like okay okay like we trust you you know exactly what you're doing and it worked out so amazing for everybody involved and all my friends were so supportive i mean i just could not shut up about it too so they just had to get used to it you know like yeah but i'm really lucky like I have such a great support system like everybody that I told like my co workers, my boss, all my friends, my family, everybody was like good for you. This is awesome like do your thing and
00:17:01
Speaker
all my co workers. They're all women to a lot of them are also moms. So they were so awesome with like, covering me while I'm gone for retrievals or doctor's appointments. I've just it was really nice to them. I love that. I love that. Was there anything you know, just as you guys have gone through and you know, from from first to current to looking back, was there anything about the process that was surprising.
00:17:36
Speaker
I don't know. What would you say? I would probably say like the feeling process. Like some of them were a lot easier than the others. And I just expected everyone to be like, I'd be
Lessons and Challenges
00:17:49
Speaker
bedridden for weeks. I don't know. You hear surgery and everything's like, well, you know, so sure. The first one was the biggest learning curve obviously and I didn't follow direction you know so the coconut water I probably was so specific she was like drink a lot of water you need to relax and you need to you know and I was like I'm so strong I can do all that you know
00:18:16
Speaker
and day I am me and my best friend went to a park and we're like going on this long walk in the heat and I'm crazy bloated and I didn't drink enough while it was just I learned so and so I was like I'm young I'm gonna bounce back I don't know So that's when when I talked to her and she's like, any tips? I was like, listen to what they say.
00:18:39
Speaker
Hear it now. Listen to your coordinator. Drink the coconut water. Take the stool softeners. take this Trust me. Take them. There probably the biggest surprises for me too, actually.
00:19:02
Speaker
I'm actually surprised at how straightforward the processes the process was. um Plus, the coordinators are so awesome at like letting us know what to expect that it wasn't really a lot of surprises, just like how easy it was.
00:19:20
Speaker
I also know that's fromtic what was it the like the psychological test? i yeah I was I think that was one of my like biggest anxieties when I was looking over the list of things I needed to do before I started this. I was like, are they about to tell me I'm crazy? You know, I thought it was In depth, I was like, uh, like, should I be worried? You know, I was like, are they only asking me for it? So I was like, but when I went in also, I think, I don't know if he'd be like a psychologist or whoever I sat down with. I remember she was really like, almost as comforting about the process. She was like, this is not as crazy as you think it probably has. And she explained what it was for and everything. And I was like, this is all good. You know, it is. Yeah.
00:20:10
Speaker
Yeah, absolutely. I mean, it's just as much for, you know, hey, we want to make sure that you're in a good place, um you know, as it is for like, crazy test, if you will. yeah
00:20:23
Speaker
No, that's fantastic. That's fantastic. So okay, now, Siobhan, I know you said you just got back from Miami. And then Jaleen, did you have to travel for any of your You did. OK. Where has everybody gone? And what would you say is something that you would want to tell a donor? Don't forget to pass. That's a good question. Oh, my gosh. I have a good story, actually. Oh, go. Go first. i my um So my current cycle is in Miami. And my previous one was here in my hometown. The one before that was in l LA, California.
00:21:05
Speaker
And that was my second cycle. So I'm like, okay, this isn't my first rodeo. Like I know what I'm doing. And they sent me out for my initial visit and I was so overconfident. I was like, oh, and this is LA. Like I've gone so many times before. Like it's whatever, it's close to home. It's fine. And I forgot my ID at the airport. Yeah, I was that person that held up the line and had to be taken to the side.
00:21:32
Speaker
Oh my gosh, it was so embarrassing. I was mortified. Luckily, they still let me through because I had um three sources of identification, including my Costco card with my photo. Yeah. Way to go Costco, same as today. Shout out to Costco. And I forgot my bra and other clothes. And I was just like, oh, I know what I'm doing. I'm just going to wear these comfy clothes. And I just forgot basic necessities.
00:22:02
Speaker
so too Overconfident I was like, oh my god, do I have to like run the target while I'm in LA? Yeah, so I would say don't forget the essentials like even stupid things like your ID like, this is good. This is good. We need all of those things.
00:22:23
Speaker
that's high been like What hearing you say is ah don't be overconfident, even if you've done this before. Yes. Yes. Because I had to hold up the line on the way there and I had to also hold up the line flying back home and I learned my lesson for sure.
00:22:39
Speaker
I love it. I love it. What about you, Jaleen? I was just going to say, like all the comfy clothes. like All the comfy clothes. The the comfiest sweatpants, a loose shirt. And you don't like leave the bra. Because maybe it's all the comfy clothes. Because afterwards, you just want to like just relax. And you um because of those like the hormones, you do feel a little bit more bloated. Do you want to wear like jeans? No. That's not the vibe now. Absolutely not.
00:23:08
Speaker
ah No, I love that. No, that's super helpful. That's super helpful. Did you guys I mean, Siobhan, I know you mentioned like you had texted Jolene like, Oh my gosh, I'm doing this. How did you guys feel whenever you were like first about to do your first donation were you care Were you excited? how Were you just like, oh my gosh, we're finally here? How did you feel? I remember being like, well, I'm already like a very like emotional person. So when I was almost four months, I was always just like teetering on the edge of just happy tears, just always. So when I was like finally there, I remember I was there with my best friend and I was and i was like, this is happening. you know
00:23:47
Speaker
so you know And every time I'd be in there with like the like the nurses and stuff, or the when they're putting the IV in and stuff, I would always just be like, thank you. you know I was like, you've been in the movie for like, so emotional.
00:24:03
Speaker
but I always felt, I was just happy. I was always just like ecstatic. And not even, not like, because we made it to the end, I was like, it's just a lot of like build up and when you're finally there it almost seems like like flew by but in the midst of it's like oh my gosh another shot another shot like let's do this you know so when you finally reach the like the end you're like oh you know like wow we're doing it again you know yeah absolutely What about you Siobhan? I feel like kind of the same like the night before my procedure I was just so I was so excited I almost couldn't sleep and I was texting Jaleen like oh my gosh I'm here I did it I'm drinking my coconut water and everything like tomorrow is the day
00:24:48
Speaker
And my husband dropped me off at the clinic and I just walked in just like through the doors open. And I'm like, I'm here. This is the season finale. Like let's do it. And it was great. It was like the best sleep I've ever gotten actually. yeah After the procedure. I love it. I love when it's difficult to let you sleep in.
00:25:12
Speaker
That's like probably my favorite thing because I've had some that were kind of like, we need the bed, you know? But like most of them were like, I was like all woozy. And I was like, I need another second. and They would like tuck me and they're like, you're good. And I was like, I love that. I'm a sleepy girl. I was like, I need another like minute or two. A second. Like, yeah hold on. Yeah, for sure. Just a second. Oh my gosh. I love it. I love it. Has there been a favorite?
00:25:42
Speaker
donation because they've been a favorite cycle. You go first, Julie. It's hard to compare. We shouldn't compare. We shouldn't have favorites, but maybe like favorite one. I got one.
00:25:58
Speaker
My very first donation was in Houston with my best friend and that one was fun, but I was like, and because I like didn't follow the rules, I was uncomfortable. But my fifth donation was also with my best friend and we went to Austin. And she was on top of me that time too, making sure I was like, solid. And then we went to Austin City Limits. And she was like, we don't have to do this if you're too tired, like you need to rest. And I was like, no, I'm good. And she was just like, so patient with me. And we still had so much fun. And Austin was definitely my favorite.
00:26:31
Speaker
It was awesome. Oh, I love that. Well, it's cool because you do I mean, you are going and doing this amazing thing.
Travel and Exploration Opportunities
00:26:37
Speaker
But then you're also getting to like see and experience things that maybe you wouldn't normally get to do. Yeah. And I just remember like even all the people at the clinic were the ones that told us about Austin city limits because we didn't know. Yeah.
00:26:49
Speaker
So we were there and like as I'm getting like prepped, you know and they're like, what are you guys doing later? you know What are you doing this weekend? It's Austin City Limits. And they were like, what's that? And he's like, you should feel good in the next few days. Maybe you guys could go. And it was like the doctor telling us this. And they were walked in and saw your RE there. I would have taken so many pictures.
00:27:16
Speaker
but Oh my god. That's so funny. Something about Texas, dude. because texas um My first cycle was also in Texas. It was in Dallas, though. And it was it was my favorite. Very clear one. Because um my husband and I, we've never been to Texas before, so that was like our first time. And you know everything's so new, and I'm excited about the process. It just made everything so much more fun. so We explored a lot. It's definitely my favorite. You went to the Botanical Garden and I went there the year before and so that's how I knew Michael because I was like, you're in Dallas. I know that garden. was like I was like sharing it on my Instagram. Like this place is so beautiful. Angeline recognized it immediately. I love it. Egg donor stalker. I love it.
00:28:14
Speaker
That's amazing! So, okay, looking back, and Siobhan, I know you're kind of in the middle of one, so maybe this isn't a fair question, but looking back, what, like, why would you say, you know, I'm glad I was an egg donor, am an egg donor, because? It's like, it's just the most rewarding thing I've ever done in my life. Like, easily, the fact that I'm like,
00:28:41
Speaker
been able to assist a family in bringing a child into this world. I'm getting chills even thinking about it now. It just it it really like blows me away that i've that I've done that because I like i still get an email like in a few months ago that my last donation was pregnant. So I have There's seven babies out there, like real babies are alive right now. Like we we we did that. It's crazy. is It really is. It's just so rewarding. And I feel like every time I've gotten the news that my IPs were pregnant or they had a live birth or they had twins, you know, I'm like, I've always been at the gym when I got this news. So I'm in the middle of the gym crying. I'm like.
00:29:25
Speaker
Wow, always at the gym on a machine, just taking a machine for like 30 minutes, like oh my goodness. No, you can't have this treadmill, I'm having a moment.
00:29:39
Speaker
Oh, that's amazing. Julie, were were all of your or were any of your cycles um known cycles or were they all not? no Okay. Yeah, they were all anonymous. I think for the final one, they asked me if I would be comfortable with having a video call with the IPs. And I was like, yes.
00:29:56
Speaker
Because I was like, I feel like I shouldn't be the one to bring that up. you know I don't know. I feel like it's like the comfort level should start with whatever they're comfortable with. you know So I just never said anything. And I remember getting that email being like, would you be comfortable with that? And I was like, absolutely. you know But then nothing came of it. So I was like, OK, I just want to ask it again. Because I probably want to do that.
00:30:22
Speaker
But I know in my profile, I said if the parents wanted to like let the kid know when they're 18 that they're from a donation, that they could reach out to me on like all of them. I said yes, because I would want to meet all of them.
00:30:41
Speaker
I'm 100% looking forward to that day 18 years from now. I'll update you guys. like I'll check in and be like, we connected finally. They're coming over for Thanksgiving, something like that. I know that botanical garden.
00:31:00
Speaker
um Let's go back and do like a family photo shoot. It'd be so funny. A full circle moment. I love it. What has you guys excited about just the potential of meeting, you know, just kiddo from this amazing experience and this gift that you gave? Maybe like, I don't know, seeing it in like real life, you know, a real live human being in front of my eyes that was like,
00:31:29
Speaker
from my genes, you know, a little egg from my body. That you helped create. I had my assistance, it was just... I feel like I'm, I'm just always a little puddle of tears. So I'll just, every time I'm like, Oh my God, I did that. You know, Oh my God. Yeah, but it is, it's a big deal. And it's amazing that, you know, especially like an 18, it's like, Oh my gosh, like you've had 18 Christmases and I bet they were amazing or, you know, like 18, you know, just, Oh my gosh, you had like, whatever it was.
Emotional Rewards and Advice
00:32:03
Speaker
Um, no, that's definitely, I mean, that's,
00:32:06
Speaker
That's such a fun thing to look forward to for sure. Siobhan, what about you? like I am so glad I am an egg donor because. i I have to agree with Jaleen. It's honestly given me such a deep sense of like fulfillment and purpose, you know knowing that you really did that. like You helped a family.
00:32:30
Speaker
conceive like their child that's huge like what a unique way to have a positive impact on somebody and that's just I just take a lot of pride in that I'm so glad that I did it and I highly recommend it for like other people that consider it it's so worth it What would you say kind of for those people who are on the fence or, you know, even going back to, you know, we had already kind of talked about whenever you guys were educating your family members, kind of those common misconceptions of what egg donation is, or maybe some of those like crazy myths out there. What would you say? What would you want to do?
00:33:07
Speaker
I would absolutely, I love to completely demystify the process because like I said, I tell everybody I meet, even like at the store, people don't even ask. I'm just like, I'm an act owner, have you ever wondered about that?
00:33:24
Speaker
ah um Yeah but it's cool to like start the conversation because then you normalize things like this and more people are like open to doing it or people that are struggling with fertility um look into this as an option um but what I would say to others is to do your research ask all the questions that you need, like make sure that you are very well informed of the process. Like I said, EDS does a phenomenal job of keeping you very informed, making sure you're educated, you know exactly what to expect, like everything, the whole scope of the procedure. um And I would also let them know there's so much support.
00:34:08
Speaker
Yeah, for them as a donor, especially with EDS, like there's so many different support systems in place to help you throughout the process. So just do it.
00:34:21
Speaker
Just do it. Yeah, just do it. It's great. What about usually jaine what would you say is maybe a common misconception or kind of a myth that you've had to like, nope, that's not correct. Or, you know, just something like that.
00:34:36
Speaker
I think of being that people brought up a lot was like, they're like, since I donated, I'm not gonna be able to have kids. And I was like, yeah, like no then that's not sugar at all so like my response was always like, well, I never really wanted children. So this was a big step reason why I kind of started doing this anyway. So it's like, I'm young and healthy.
00:34:54
Speaker
And I don't want kids, you know, so I was like, that's fine. But I was like, but even if I did, I'm fine. You know, I would like always pick get up. I'm like, like, there's no, there's not gonna be any issues. I have plenty left, you know. i have ah Yeah, no, I mean, you're so right, though. Like, it's kind of like what you said in the beginning. It's not like it as a woman, you were born with all of your eggs. And they're, you know, so it's not as though like, they're going in there and pulling out You're just everything. You're all of your ovaries. That's not how that process works. um No, but that's a huge one. I know I've definitely, you know if you go to you know Dr. Google or Dr. TikToker, things like that, it can it can get a little dicey out there. So so yeah, no, that that's huge. That's amazing.
00:35:43
Speaker
Um, what would you, I mean, I know Siobhan you're, you're big, like you're just, just do it, but what would you say to maybe, um, any woman out there that is thinking about being an egg donor? Or maybe what would you say to somebody who's in the midst of like their first cycle? I would say find someone who's already donated. Like, cause I think talking to someone, it makes it like a little bit more real because when I didn't even know anything about it. And I started researching and like watching videos and getting like, formed and like hearing other people's like stories that just like, kind of like lessons like the fear around it, you know, of just like the yeah, and of what to expect and everything like, and you just talk to somebody who's done it or I know it's kind of I don't know, like, I still don't think I've ever met anyone like in the wild, you know, that's ever donated or had like is like open about it, you know, some like just
00:36:40
Speaker
Yeah, so I've never met anyone to like talk to about it. So I was like, I don't know, just find find a support group, find someone to talk to you about it. Yeah, definitely. That's a good point. I'm glad I had you Julie.
00:36:51
Speaker
yeah
00:36:55
Speaker
I know when I was like my first donation, I was talking to Callie and I just like I I remember I blew her up with questions. Well, like she already sent me everything and there's already so much information on the EDS website. So she was like, read this article and that'll answer like all the questions and the questions that you're going to have after that, you know, like.
00:37:15
Speaker
And the ones who didn't even know to ask. She do. I love it. What about you Siobhan? What would you say? I would like I said say just do it like especially with um a clinic that you trust just like EDS. I mean you guys are so supportive and And throughout the entire process, there wasn't a single second where I felt like, oh, this is a business transaction. I was treated like exactly like I'm a person. I'm a donor. I'm helping a family. like You guys really care. And I feel like when you have somebody like that kind of guiding you through and with Jeline's help, I was like, there's no question. Just do it.
00:38:02
Speaker
It was great. thank you Yeah, the initial like filling out of the profile can feel a little bit daunting. And I would say just kind of like take your time with that so you can go into as much detail as possible. Yeah, I think that's what took me the longest was filling out that thing. I kept coming back to it it probably took me like six months because I like I was genetic testing. I was like,
00:38:28
Speaker
I don't you know there was just but I was like just take your time because if you I don't know I feel like if you you can kind of freak yourself out with all that information of being like thinking it's just feel a little bit daunting. So it's just like, take your time. I fill it out like thoroughly and you know, sure, sure. And for those who don't know that application is asking a ton of questions about just your family history and health history and like all kinds of things. So yeah, I mean, I, I'm, I've gone through that application and I'm pretty sure I don't know half the answers to that. And I would have to like call up family members to fill out any of it. So yeah, there's a lot of phone calls, a lot of phone calls.
00:39:05
Speaker
ah yeah
00:39:07
Speaker
yeah I think it took me like a year to fill out mine because I was like doing it and then I got a new job so I was focusing on that but yeah it took me about a year to finally get through all of it.
00:39:21
Speaker
That's a long time.
00:39:24
Speaker
Maybe don't take a year, but breaking it up into chunks, that's good. Yeah, breaking it up into chunks. A lot of it is about yourself too, which I think is really important because the intended parents, they want to get to know a little bit about you too. And if you want to take this whole thing seriously, you should take your time on those parts as well. Yeah, absolutely.
00:39:49
Speaker
Cause some of the questions can be short of just like, did you play sports when you were a child? And the answer shouldn't just be like, yep. You know? Like I had like, cause I played a lot of sports. I went into like such detail. I remember calling Callie after I finished it and I was like, is that too much? You know? And she's like, no, that's what you need to do. And I was like, okay. Okay. It's like my rant. Yes. No, but you're so right. You're so right. Um, because yes, intended parents are wanting to get to know You and have all of those details and no that is such that is such great advice Especially for something as important as that What would you say is something just from the egg donor perspective that you would want to say to?
00:40:34
Speaker
and
00:40:36
Speaker
Well, I would say um that, you know, every egg donor is different, but they should know that this is not just like something that you do willy-nilly. It's something that people take very seriously once they commit to.
00:40:53
Speaker
So to manage their expectations on what we can do, but know that we're doing this because we care and we want to help and we want them to have a happy little family that they deserve. So yeah.
00:41:12
Speaker
Oh, I love that. No, but you're so right. You're so right. I mean, going back to the beginning, like it's it's not a quick walk in, walk out and get paid. likes It's so much more than that. And it is, you get those letters and you you hear from just that big impact that you've just done. And I mean, that's huge. Absolutely. Absolutely.
00:41:34
Speaker
So okay, my final question to you guys, and it's a fun one. Don't worry, Jillian, you're not going to cry, I promise. um For anyone who knows me, they know that I have a very codependent relationship with coffee.
00:41:50
Speaker
So I always like to ask the question, what filled your cup today? What was the thing that just gave you life today?
00:42:00
Speaker
um I would say well I told all my co-workers and all my friends that I was gonna do this podcast with EDS and walking into work and they were like oh my gosh today's the day are you so excited and they were asking like when can we listen to it when does the episode come out and I'm just like I don't know I'm actually super nervous but for them telling me like It's gonna be okay. You're gonna do great. Like you're so involved with this process. Like just talk. They were just like really coaching me and being very encouraging and ah that like calm my nerves a lot. Plus texting Jolene. I was like, girl, we're gonna do this. I think just connecting with everybody around me about it really like filled my cup for sure. Yeah, sure. I love that. I love that you're still leaning on your support system.
00:42:51
Speaker
Love them, can't do this without him. I'll definitely say like, I was hanging out with my fiancé all day. Well, he went golfing in the morning and I got to sleep in, which was lovely. And then went to the golf store and he was just having like a, it was like a ah gay day, which was nice seeing him like have like, just be happy in his little golf store, you know, and he was excited for me to do this. And then while we were at the golf stores, when she told me and it was her. And that really like, blew my mind. So I think honestly, that's what like, tips my cup over the like overflow. I was so excited. i was Like, leading all up to this for it's been like months that we've been planning this or you know, and I thought I was going to be like,
00:43:36
Speaker
strangers, but like sister strangers, you know, and I was like, it's gonna be it's gonna be good. You know, when she said it was her and I was like, Oh my gosh, it's my friend. It's gonna be awesome. It's gonna be so awesome. that's amazing. That's amazing. Well, um,
00:44:05
Speaker
You guys, I just, I'm so grateful um for, you know, we have been planning this for months and I'm so glad we were able to do this. I am just, I'm so grateful for your vulnerability and just everything you've done are currently doing um for, you know, just those amazing um families that you are serving and giving just that hope and that amazing gift. And I and Again, just so grateful that you are willing to talk about it or passionate about it. And um you know I hope that when others hear just how excited you are about it, it just gets them even more excited. So thank you for your time and thank you for doing this. I really appreciate it. Of course. Thank you so much for having us. This was so much fun.
00:44:55
Speaker
Thank you so much for joining us on this episode of Me, You, and Who. We appreciate your time and hope you enjoyed our discussion today. As we wrap, we would like to remind you of some of the ways that you can stay connected with us and be part of the Me, You, and Who podcast community. Firstly, if you haven't already, make sure to subscribe to our podcast on your favorite platform.
00:45:19
Speaker
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00:45:34
Speaker
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00:45:57
Speaker
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