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00:00:01
No More Low Hanging Fruit
48 Plays1 year ago
Clear your desk of useless tasks and make room for important things like, throwing dildos onto a basketball court.
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Transcript
Creating Comedy: Satire and Humor
00:00:06
Speaker
You know what I think could get me going as a comedy, like a sort of a satirical comedy type album. Although I don't really know what's funny anymore, but I think that could get me going on just writing some silly sort of left field shit. It's like, I like the songs, the comedy songs that they sound really serious and then all of a sudden he's talking about putting his fingers in his butt.
00:00:30
Speaker
There's, there's people make it doing really well with that genre. Like people that are entertainers, they kind of understand a thing, but they're just go out there and not like talk shit to the crowd, but they're playing an instrument and and singing funny shit. That element of surprise is never, never gets old. Like you said, it happens. It did. It happens in Christian rock too.
00:00:51
Speaker
was a Denver comic pad a joke about how you get tricked into like, Oh, this is a good song. This is this is dope. And all of a sudden, it's like, Jesus, I need you in me, you know, like the the it'll switch over to Christian Rock. It's the same thing. to I am trying to figure it out. Exactly. to teach And then it's like,
00:01:12
Speaker
He will help me, Jesus. And you're like, bah, turn it down. It's a great riff. It's a nice alternative energy at the outset. And then you hit me with Jesus. yeah Fucking assholes. That's what you got to harness that, Lance, but into the community. But you already do
Seriousness in Parody and Social Commentary
00:01:32
Speaker
that. You're already doing that with this show. The few songs you put down on vinyl for us have a are are in that parody sense. Yeah, but how do you take yourself seriously doing that all day, man? This is a problem, bro. What do you need to take your yourself seriously? I should be fucking at the soup kitchen, bro, serving homeless. Dude, you know what?
00:01:53
Speaker
There you go. There's the formula. yeah We always take a homeless as or are or disabled people like you can't fuck with them so that you don't they they don't get the joy. Like you would fucking sing to me some stupid song about whatever, but you wouldn't get the soup kitchen. You wouldn't do it. You'd be like, you got to be like, how are you? How are you? Maybe they want you to fucking talk about their cock and sing and treat them like normal people, Lance. Just treat them like you would anyone else. Stop by the store today.
00:03:00
Speaker
I don't know if we were brainstorming this episode but you had sent me something that I actually thought was serious for this week's episode. I can't stop using the n-word on public transportation because I knew your car was in the shop.
00:03:13
Speaker
And I thought maybe you were using public transportation and I thought you were slinging the N word. I wasn't sure if it was true or not. Would I be sitting here, you think, or would I be dead?
Racial Remarks and Social Comfort Zones
00:03:24
Speaker
Maybe not. What do you think happens? This is like, did you get, did you have a, and did you have like that in general psychology in college, there was like a deviant class or, what was it? There was a class that was like, one of the projects ah at Colorado was like to go out and do something stupid in public and like, and write about it.
00:03:41
Speaker
I was like a sociology class probably. Yeah, exactly. Yeah, like if I did the study, I was racist guy on the bus. Like if I was in East St. Louis and just started pumping out M bombs on public transit, am I dead? Or or is it is it so crazy that everyone's like, I'm not gonna mess with that crazy fucking idiot Yeah. It's probably crazy looking. It depends on how you say it too. Like there's a ah racist version of it that I have in my head. And then there's like a real crazy white guy who thinks he's Jesus kind of guy. I don't really know, but like, no, who does that by themselves? Yeah. That's a stupid question. But like, like you're, have you ever been around someone that's like really comfortable with their racism?
00:04:30
Speaker
I remember on a loading dock once in St. Louis, a guy a guy showed up to deliver something, was like, I'm late. And then just went into this tire, and the reason why it was late is because the bad drivers, and the bad drivers were all one particular race. And the words he was using to describe them were the N word and all this shit. yeah And I'm like, this is he's really comfortable with this racism. And then you're assuming that other people are like, yeah, they have issues driving, bro.
00:05:01
Speaker
wait it Like, it's kind of weird. I haven't been around that since high school, honestly. Yeah, well, there's that youthful tension kind of like makes people get fired up one way or the other. Yeah, the kids in our high school that wore cowboy boots would sort of say that in safe places. But I haven't been around a long time. In safe places, yeah. But yeah yeah public transit might not be a safe place. No, which is why I was being an idiot thinking that was going to be a real episode. It would it would go nowhere.
00:05:29
Speaker
ah We'd have to temper it down maybe a little bit. Well, it'd be good to get you actually saying the N-word test. Test some theories. What you can do the episode is, because I think all people and all races are guilty of it, is when there's ah some adverse event happens, you you immediately put whos ever in that event, it'll it'll trigger stuff. It'll be like, oh, it wasn't it wasn't there a guy hit my car, and then it becomes a Mexican hit my car. Or a fat bitch or whatever, yeah.
00:06:01
Speaker
Yeah, I don't do that, actually. Yeah, I know i know you don't. Well, no, I mean, i i put up what I do do, which is more ridiculous, is I actually take on, like, a black dude. In times of, like, stress, you can ask my wife. All of a sudden, I start jiving and start acting like I'm in the hood, like, running from the crips. Like, oh, no, he didn't. type Oh, yeah. And this is where, you know, I'll put it on air, like, in a car, somebody cuts me off.
00:06:30
Speaker
this man and it ah I don't know why and it's probably it's completely real. It's not it's a I think it sometimes it is just making fun of myself But like really when push comes to shove dude, I will get into that and I don't know if it's stress of Childhood stuff that I was mixed up in and and and how you acted in those moments is it Because we I don't know, like we embrace that culture, we're young and talk like that sometimes in a sort of a joking way. And then now you become it. Like we don't impersonate like shit off of the chronic or something like that. Which yeah you know, like the Beastie Boys actually were kind of like mocking the whole hip hop scene and then became like really into it. Maybe that happened to you.
00:07:24
Speaker
I don't know, man, but every time I amp up, all of a sudden I'm slipping, I'm code switching into a black dude's voice ah little a little more. And then if it heats up even more, then it's like full on. If you didn't know I was white, you'd be like, okay, that brother's tripping. But I don't know why. I love the the idea of your little beautiful white family sitting there listening to you in the car and screaming.
00:07:54
Speaker
Oh, hey. And they're like, dad, come on, bro. Take it easy, Well, we're all unique and interesting people. Oh, there we go. But that's not the episode. Let's get to that. it's Thanks for putting that out there publicly. My little yeah my little personal text to you, dude. Well, Matt says a lot of jokes like that, people. Just so you know, you would not want to read our back and forth chat. You would i not. Yeah.
00:08:21
Speaker
I don't know, I just think the whole thing is funny. Because I think people think that a lot of people, racism is like that. Some guy that would sit on the bus and just start screaming N words. Not many people that was out there, honestly. No, sir. But the issue at hand. Oh, go ahead. Well, you brought it up, bro. How am I not going to dig into this thing that you put out? All right, now let's let's switch gears. Let's get to the episode. Let's get to the episode. I got to work now, dude. i't I can't just ramble on all day.
00:08:51
Speaker
So the issue here is a general procrastination or perhaps an avoidance tactic that you and I have both been feeling. Perhaps there's doubt, insecurity, or fear of digging into something that's important to us. And instead we circle back to these real easy routines, these low scheduled days,
00:09:16
Speaker
And there are different unique, I don't know, interesting dynamics that play out as a part of that that I want to talk about. ah And we're in different situations. I'm not sure what's going on with me in that sense, but I definitely have things that I'm just like putting on that putting on the table and saying later, not now. And then I think my biggest concern with respect to this is like all the big things that I say I want to do.
00:09:44
Speaker
Uh, like read, not that's big, but like, you know, get smarter, write songs, do this. Well, I'm never putting that on the schedule. Right. Instead, I literally put, put garbage out on Thursday on the schedule. check ra So, so what's that about? Yeah, I wonder too, because it's right now I'm kind of a put up, I'm in a, maybe a put up.
00:10:14
Speaker
Shut up. I can't shut up, put up and survive. So I gotta, I gotta to put on the schedule, be productive. Like it can't just be productive in these little, little victories. The trash is out, laundry is done, dogs are walked. yeah like Dude, I almost can't do anything if I feel like my dogs aren't tired. Bizarre. I remember back when you had dogs. I was the same. Yeah. And now you hate animals.
00:10:40
Speaker
It's such a weird feeling dude when you think your dogs are anxious or not are not like exercise bizarre Yeah, well I'm gonna sneak this back into that about 30 seconds ago I hate animals and you hate blacks I'm gonna edit that back in Okay, good. Okay. I'm not gonna deny it. It would take away from your what you're trying to accomplish here there's like a There's an interesting thing I'm thinking about with other people too, but like you're what you do to procrastinate. I don't know if it's the right word, but like it can still be productive. I think you and I, when we have big decisions to make, my form of procrastination is to work out. It makes me sound like some dumb meathead, but actually for a lot of people that is climbing the mountain. It's impossible. And I'm like, Oh God damn, I actually need to make some decisions on this business. We're trying to start up. Oh, I'll go work out.
00:11:36
Speaker
I want to walk the dogs, right? Like these are productive things. And for some people, they're hard to do. For me, that's my procrastination. But it prevents me from putting more meaningful shit into my day. like Or I can't i can't start ah start the engine up without doing those firsts. Something like that.
00:11:52
Speaker
Well, that makes sense. I mean, that's healthy coping in general, right? And I and sometimes I'll pat myself on the back for if I have anxiety or I'm stressed, like that that's what I'll use as opposed to what vape, weed, fucking alcohol. So I think you're doing that. Isn't that more of a survival mechanism for you? Like you got to get that done and then get to to business matters or are you really using it? tra yeah Yeah. Is it a delay tactic?
00:12:21
Speaker
A little bit. I mean, there is some thinking going on like that. Like if you go up for a run or you work out, you are thinking. So there's a little bit of that, but yeah I mean, I could do this for weeks. Like, okay, I have, I should, I should, there's something I need to do for this, this slab table business right now. I need to find some stuff probably from China and bring it here. I can put this out for weeks slowly. Like, well, I'll do that after I do these things. I'll do that after I do this. Cause you know, if you like go to the gym or you go run Kind of get there time to get back time to clean up. All of a sudden you're like up four o'clock days gone. I Could do it for weeks, but i don't I don't know what it is But once you once you've eaten the forbidden fruit, I'll tell you that it's hard to sit here It's like hard to at least now I'm talking to you, but it's also hard those activities just physically feel better Yeah, and that's like it's hard for me to go. I'm gonna I'm gonna spend an hour on
00:13:16
Speaker
marketing POS, looking at Instagram, and I don't know, it's it's hard for me to fathom that. It's like the like, it's hard for me to wrap my head around other shit. So I do these smaller things. Yeah, do you think you're afraid of locking yourself into hard work, and specifically hard work that puts you in front of a computer? That's my question. Am I afraid? I don't know if I'm lazy. Am I afraid? Am I lazy? Or am I just normal? Like,
00:13:46
Speaker
Cause these things like for me, surfing, working out, am I trying to escape or am I, or are they healthy? Like you said, like healthy places and thought, it's a little bit of both.
00:13:57
Speaker
but they're they're counterproductive for actual just being productive and in the Western sense of the word of working. And um I think we're fortunate that the stuff we like to do when we're procrastinating is generally healthy. Like you said, at least I could go to the bar like 10 in the morning, start crushing, or go to strip club, or whatever bullshit people get wrapped up in. but By the way, strip clubs in the daytime,
00:14:27
Speaker
No moss. How about um the guy going to the buffet, eating that strip club like <unk> club buffet? Come on. But I saw, I'm not i'm not exaggerating here, it was the Red Guard or downtown Denver, went midday with some friends, we turned 18. Maybe you were there, I'm not even sure. No, I don't think you were. Pregnant lady, pregnant lady, dancing, no joke.
00:14:53
Speaker
Is that a fetish type thing you think or or could be maybe she needed to get some cash for the baby? Yeah, who's who's who's more weird than that one? The girl or the people hanging out there? Was she getting action? Like, say like, not really. You throw her fiber bro, just to help out. Hey, good luck with the pregnancy. No.
00:15:17
Speaker
I just remember it as a very awkward thing as a young, young man. Like, where the hell are we, bro? That's like, it's weird. You're 18 is probably one of your first and last strip club experiences because I seriously, seriously. the The other time I experienced that sort of weirdness was in Des Moines. We were traveling for the band and I went, we went to a strip club in Des Moines, Iowa, and it was like fucking rundown.
00:15:43
Speaker
rundown women, no not to knock them like they're they're entitled to not be perfect, but it was really different. When you get when you get out there to like a tier two level city, strip club situation's a little rough. Everything is fine dining's rough, fine dining's like fucking Burger King, bro. A lot of tired action. Like I remember in Peoria, the comedy club that I used used to work is literally connected to a strip club.
00:16:13
Speaker
And it was like, you know, I remember I went at my, my, the headliner was like, let's go, let's go over there. I think it might've been between shows or something. He was just like, I'm going to, let's go see what's going on over there. So we just walked in the entryway way. And I'm like, is that a fucking washer and dryer over there in the corner? Someone's giving a lap dance. And I was like, are we in like center of the mingle? It had the weirdest like, like.
00:16:38
Speaker
before I moved down to America, Latina, but I was like, it feels like we're in another country. Like what you'd expect in like ah like a semi strip club whorehouse in Havana or something. It was just, it was so weird. But, uh, I bet you, you hear the N word sling in there, Peoria. I don't know. Actually, most of the dudes in this, actually most of the, most of the dudes in the strip club, like they were, they were there like as customers were, were those people were, uh,
00:17:09
Speaker
It really set me up here. I like it. I don't mind. ah But, uh, yeah, I don't know where we got here. How we got here. Let's go back. Well, we don't, we don't necessarily do that. That kind of shit. Cause I know people like that, like they're, they're out always. It's like, let's go strip club or people that are like, I'm getting fucked up. I don't care. Especially now in like these, these WhatsApp groups and shit. You gringos don't do that, but like, whatever you do, you, some guys send you a picture of a scotch at 10 in the morning.
00:17:39
Speaker
Happy. We don't do that. But it doesn't mean what we're doing is necessarily more productive as far as figuring out our lives either. but It's not self destructive. It's not self destructive. Yeah, right. Okay, so I gotta I would like to figure out what it is because I've always considered myself a pretty lazy person. And for people like, refute that if it' people that really know me or like, what are you talking about? But I'm like, I just have a hard time getting going. And and I think it's like laziness or something. Maybe it's not maybe it's like, ah like you said, a fear or something like that. But Yeah. Don't you think it's contextual? Because I've always been labeled as a very type A person. But my first job coming out of college, the my boss was like, you know, you're just lazy. And you know, my job was to my job. Yeah, literally. Yeah. My job was to read financial statements and like categorize the company and help. You'd rather get shot in the head, right? Yeah, exactly. So with three of them. Yeah. But like, if I was needing to practice for the band or write songs,
00:18:38
Speaker
I grind all day. So that's part of it, I think. Yeah, it is contextual, but it's it's it's what we talked about too, though. I don't have that financial motivation as far as success. I mean, I have financial motivation with the family and stuff, but I don't have that, like, gotta gotta crush. And so that is like, all right, if you don't have that, then you're like, well then what's your motivation?
00:19:06
Speaker
You know, right? Can we take a minute and belittle those people? That's all they think about is my crush crushing fucking No, we can't business. Okay. Come on. I think we have I know I'm joking Yeah, I don't have that What I never I never had that when I was working you bring that up though, but like I've actually I I think I'm going to be working with people now. Like they're their thing. Like, you know, I don't know if you call it their scapegoat is like, go back to this, go back to that grind, figure out this business. And they're like, I'm getting texts at 10 o'clock at night. Have you looked at this? Have you seen this? Because that's, that's all they know. Like we only know that we could go over on sprints. They're like, this is what they do when they're bored or they're trying to put off, they might be putting off their relationship with somebody else or who knows what they're putting off.
00:19:54
Speaker
But they're like, it's like, I don't actually bring it up. you Should we criticize them? Maybe not. they're they're just That's their release as well. That's all they know. That's their comfortable place so they go back to it. That's their dog walking, Lance. And the world accepts that, especially for men. It's like, go hunt, dude. Go make that money. Make that coin, crush. And there's such an easy cop out on that one, which has just just gotta got to support my family.
00:20:21
Speaker
so So what happened to us, dude? Was it like the toxic waste that was supposedly underneath our high school? Is that that get to us? Falcon crest. But why, why are, well, would there are people that came out of our high school that are driven. There are. Yeah, I know. I bet you some people just go, Oh, that's just, it is because you guys are lazy. So your cop out is you can't do it. So you, you're just going to act like you don't care.
00:20:48
Speaker
Yeah, but am I, I mean, do you like a full schedule? I've never been somebody like, there's a lot of tension in my marriage because of this. Like I don't even want to, I would rather go to off the cuff concerts that you wouldn't have to plan in advance, like small, small venue stuff, then, you know, schedule something five months out ah to Red Rocks. I'd rather go off the cuff comedy club, then like see the blue chip headliner and schedule it way in advance. Like go to the Buell Theater and see whoever.
00:21:19
Speaker
Chris Chris Rock planning, dude. Yeah, like, I'm speaking on that way. That's the problem. Even that, like, you said marriage tension, like, there was a it was cool, like, with with my wife, remember, we're younger, we're both kind of like always off the cuff, people are always so surprised, dude, because we'd come down to Costa Rica with no plans.
00:21:39
Speaker
And people be like, how you can't get a hotel. You can't get a hotel this time of year without, and we'd be like, we we can get a hotel. It's okay. you're like Live out somewhere and get a hotel. But then like, you know, then you it's nice in a couple of major decisions in your life. If one person is kind of a planner and my older brother, you take a vacation with him, it's dialed in. We, we went to Europe a couple of years ago where we're like, what should we do next?
00:22:05
Speaker
Like, I don't know. We didn't have a plan. We had a car and we had a flight home and it was like, what do you think we should do? Where should we go? And that, you know, that morning we'd figure out where we're going to stay that night. And that was pretty awesome. But it's also like nice to have the planner. So there is a little bit of that. Like I don't, I'm not really a planner and I don't really like getting tied down to like a date or a meeting or anything like that. I don't know why. I wish I knew what that was, but Yeah, I don't either. People go, Hey, do you want to go to that concert? You want to, I'll be like, yeah, I think so. Let me, let me, let me see what's going on. I know. And then it sits there in that, in that area, like forever. That's where it is. And that in purgatory and then, ah and then I'll, and then I'll do it in the end and pay like $9 billion dollars because, because of, you know, cause I waited too long. Yeah. No, I'll make up preferences that don't exist. Oh, I'm not really a big venue guy.
00:22:59
Speaker
It's just more that I don't want that something on the schedule. Like we had a friend reach out, like they wanna book some comedy thing nine months in advance. Oh, I hate that fucking person, dude. Hell no. they're They're a nice person, but like that's tough. No, no, I don't know him, but I hate that personality. where The guy's like pinning you down for New Year's on February 15th. Like what are we doing for New Year's? Everything gets booked. I think it's just more of a real realistic thing with this particular performer, but yes, no, I didn't ever like that.
00:23:29
Speaker
Well, yeah, there are there are people that there are stuff that will sell out. And but ah yeah, that is really hard. are Our people used to try to plan like couples vacations with us. And it would be like, I know you're driving towards the finish line here, but you ain't getting a yes or no from us until the next day. So fucking take actually you, you you know, like, God, maybe 10 years ago, you reached out to me out of the blue and we're like, we'll come to Costa Rica. We're trying to plan it. Remember that? No.
00:23:59
Speaker
And then you, I think you maybe you bought your house and so either you sold it or something. You're like, yeah, we're not going to do a big vacation this year. This was, this was maybe fifth, 2015, 16. Cause I was still in like an old house. ah stand um Yeah, man. Well, you guys make it down here. We'll, we'll try to hook up with you. It's like, I'm not like, I wouldn't commit to anything. It was like, actually you've been Chris, one of our guests, he was coming down here for a few years. I remember he'd always be like, what week works?
00:24:27
Speaker
what works. And I'd be like, I get this like weird feeling of like, Oh, when I have to do you'll have no problem with me, dude, because I'll come down and I won't be like, I'll have the same fear on the other side of it. oh I'm gonna have to hang out this MF and his kids for four days straight. And, not you know, well, I don't Yeah, but I don't know if it's that it's like, I mean, I think it's looking back on our relationship. It's the lock. It's being locked into it.
00:24:52
Speaker
You had to get sign off from the management team and then she wasn't a decision maker either and then she she'd always come back with like, oh, well, something i had I had this, well, you didn't tell me you had that. And then it'd be like, why don't we always go with your friends? We never see my, oh, that kind of crap was part of it. But that's not the only thing. i'm I'm like this with or without somebody like that, you know? Yeah, I think the greatest phrase for ah me around friends and family is, what do we wanna do today?
00:25:19
Speaker
in the morning. Just game time decision. Just in the morning. Yeah. What do we want to do? But you got to get to like wherever the lake house or. or Well, you got a plan. That's where I benefit from my wife. Like, yeah, we're, if we're going to go to Florida, she figures out the house. I'm not trying to say we like. But what, like when? So, so right now is she looking at what you're doing in July?
00:25:39
Speaker
I don't know, she finished up booking the spring break stuff. But the July depends on his basketball shit. But no, I like that planning makes total sense to me. But when we get to a place or even on a weekend, I like the idea of like, so what are we going to lay out? We're doing we're doing canopy tour on Thursday. So we can figure canopy tour out on Thursday.
00:26:01
Speaker
Yeah, yeah or an alternative that doesn't suck athlete Yeah, why don't you go fucking in and make sure you order the pictures too, bro Yeah, make sure you get that sweet canopy tour snapshot. Yeah but this tension. How does that? Yeah, go ahead I was gonna say this tension for you though. It it's not really based on, you know vacationing is it? No, because it's not just vacationing. It's like I don't know. Like some people say it's some sort of commitment thing. Is it a professional identity issue? And is it only an issue because the society's expectations? Walk me through that. It could be, but I don't understand that. Well, like right now you're trying to make some some money and there might be some fear and uncertainty and and what and ends up happening in terms of how much you get hooked into any set of activities.
00:26:53
Speaker
And particularly activities you don't like. Like if your routine like starts to have, you know, daily has to do with some cold calling. No, just some things that are not appealing. Right. that sorting Maybe you have some uncertainty about that. It's like I have the same thing when it's like, how much do I want to work with kids? And I work with some shitheads last night. And then I think about am I going to go?
00:27:16
Speaker
do more work with kids during the day. And, uh, I'm just like having a Bobby night, dude. fairs and But, uh, that could be the issue for you is you have that fear of getting locked in, getting committed to other people to have to deliver. And that's that there's some pressure in that can be exciting at first. And then it gets, uh, it can be suffocating. That could be, you know, it's a, it's a fear thing, a fear factor.
00:27:45
Speaker
ah Yeah, there's probably some something has to do maybe to like, you have to set some boundaries in a way to like, you start making critical decisions, you start dealing with other people, they start to weigh in, you need to stand up for yourself and be like, this is what I want to do. And there's a lot of tension that comes with those relationships, even if they're good. Same with a marriage, same with anything else. And maybe that's something I've never been good at. So that's like, creeps in my head, oh, there's gonna be a whole lot of challenging work and challenging conversations, and I don't want to deal with that shit. Yeah. You think there's something to do? I'll just go slam some Iranian deadlifts and fuck everyone. Iranian? North Korean hang cleans. Or whatever that shit you were doing. Is there something about your identity that's mixed up in there? Where, you know, yeah I think that might be gone. Well, but you start to do this type of work, like your identity now is sort of
00:28:45
Speaker
outside of society, I don't know, slightly bohemian, fucking lazy bastard, surfer, family man, whatever you wanna call it. Ripped. Ripped as fuck. Do you think that youre it's a threat to your identity to get locked into some sort of professional ah routine? I think i think it might've been at some point, but I think i don't i don't think so now. like you think It's almost like you gotta bounce off the bottom, as we say. and i don't I don't really care now. I don't think anyone would criticize me for like trying to make a couple moves. No, I'm where I'm at. I also like when you talk to enough people, it's it's like it shouldn't be this way where you have to hear somebody else to validate your decision stuff. But I get a lot of like, dude, you've already won. Whatever you do is fine because you've already won because you maintain your smart assness. You live in tropical paradise.
00:29:39
Speaker
You see your kids all the time. Like you've already won. So your identity is safe and secure, you know, like you still have the balls to say whatever you want. Most situations. Yeah. Yeah. So no, but that's like, it'd be nice if that came from within, like I could just wake up and be like, I can do whatever I want because I've managed to to not be in other situations that bother me. But sometimes you need outside people to tell you that you're okay.
00:30:08
Speaker
So my point is, I feel like because of what because of some how I feel now and what other people have said, it's like, I don't i can i can commit to something, like even if it's not exactly what I want, because I've had a pretty good run. And I'll continue to have one if I can be myself. Are you secure in your identity as you approach some of these changes? You feel like you'll kind of get lost? like Maybe I haven't really thought about my identity as much as I should.
00:30:35
Speaker
because I haven't really thought about that much. Do you think about your identity? Is that getting the word you are? I don't know if I think about it so much in detail. I think about the expectations that other people might have of me. So is it a worthwhile life to fucking do wind sprints and do the piece of shit podcast? Is that completely self-fulfilling, self-adulation? Is that a word? That's a word.
00:31:01
Speaker
Dude, if you compare all this, all the bullshit now in the Western world, self-help and mental health, and you compare it to like Eastern philosophies where everything is about the outside and other people, and everything now is so much self, but then you put in the idea of like, we have wind sprints or something like that, it's like, oh, am I just being overly selfish with my time? But you can make the argument you can't help anyone else unless you're healthy. So there's that. yeah I mean, I just, I think there's a complete obliteration of community in the US specifically, yeah, and more and more around the world. But like, so you are alone and you are trying to figure out how to maintain ah balance and good mental health. And so some of those solitary activities, especially around exercise are useful, but yeah, the question remains like, is thatta is that a meaningful life? Is that a good life? We all have to decide, there's a spectrum there.
00:31:57
Speaker
And I think more and more for me, it's like, I guess I don't give a fuck. I think I'm pretty yeah comfortable with the exception of what happens from basically one in the afternoon to about four. You like you feel like you put the.
00:32:12
Speaker
I mean, what we're talking about is essentially what everyone sees in their parents or grandparents after a while. The guy who's, you know, my parents are scheduled of getting the mail, taking up the trash. When are they going to take their shower? When are they doing this? Is that is the day and they and like a lot of people are comfortable in that. And it might be like I watch the news at five o'clock and then I eat and the day just goes by and there's little limited stress in it. And there's just a minor amount of success in it, right? Because you checked off those five things.
00:32:43
Speaker
and mission accomplished and you hit that pillow exhausted. And like we we almost liked that. What we're talking about is like that that older person routine. For me, it's actually fine, it but it doesn't pay well. Yeah, it doesn't pay well. But the alternative though, and and this is like the alternative for me was ah attention headache, excuse me, a attention headache all week. And um just task, task, task, meeting, meeting, meeting, meeting.
00:33:12
Speaker
And that didn't feel good. And then so the things that you enjoyed in your life, like got condensed and rushed. And so I'd be doing like quick workouts. and Yeah. How, but how close are you to that? Like, cause just cause we talked about a few episodes, you ramp up coaching. Are you, are you a couple, a couple extra hours away from no headaches or no, ah it's a different thing. No, not, not at this point, but, but you know, you do feel that.
00:33:39
Speaker
When you've been, let's say, blessed with an opportunity to kind of check out of the hustle grind culture, you do you do feel like, oh shit, what's it gonna feel like if I have to get back into that? What's the piece of shit statement in this? I don't know if we started there, by the way. I'm a piece of shit because I i continue i continue to let the sort of the low-hanging fruit of the day rule my day. That's how I feel. Well,
00:34:08
Speaker
What is it you're trying to accomplish? There's a great book that we're slinging around in the corporate world called Deep Work. Have you heard of it? Some dude named Cal Newport. Reading's on my list, by the way, something I'm not doing. Yeah, he's a professor somewhere who gives a shit where. He's a pussy. No, he's smart, dude, but he talks about society's really structured around distraction now as we all know. yeah You remember some of those corporate days we've had where you know you're spawning to like 40 emails and that's your whole day just emailing. right
00:34:44
Speaker
And there's some aspect of your work, I think, well, hopefully, if it's good work, that's require some deep thinking and some craftsmanship and some, you know, building some meaningful artifact of sorts, that that's missing in a lot of people's jobs. And they really struggle to find time and carve that out to do the thinking that moves important decisions forward. Or ah is that what you're missing when it comes to wood slabs?
00:35:11
Speaker
ah No, you know, right now I'm in the very early stages of it. And so far, it's, it's good. It's it's just simply like, I'm working, we're going to create something and we're going to try to try to make it successful. It's like at the basic level. It's all it is. I'm not like, well, this has always been a passion of mine would get anything like that. It's just like, Hey, let's, let's have a steak and something and try to make it work. And I think if, if I can stay in that zone,
00:35:41
Speaker
It's just steps. It's just passes chopping wood. It's just like got to do this got to get our LLC registered got to got to figure out what product works online got to figure out price points got to figure out a location. It's just like step by step small steps. And none of it's like goddamn I have to do this. I don't have to do this. It's just like things that things we have to do. And I'm okay with that. It's almost like I need to make you need to get in your head that those things are these the low hanging fruit.
00:36:08
Speaker
And so if you can get anything that's like a big task in your head, okay, it's just low hanging fruit is this small step, compart to mentalize a little bit and then then it doesn't seem as bad. It's not an identity crush. It's not a crush on my surf career because it's like, well, this is all I gotta do is figure this out and then I can go surf and whatever, you know, hang out with my kids.
00:36:28
Speaker
Well I think my concern for you in the future as this goes along or me as I decide to do something else or just society as a whole is there are more opportunities to kind of construct a life where you are doing nothing but low-hanging fruit and there's an appearance of productivity, there's an appearance of satisfaction. And that's just obviously tech related options. You know, you you worked in the pandemic, it was all remote, and there was just chats flying back and forth in their emails. And there was really no space for connection and and deep work. I think the thing that worries me the most is like, to just get together with somebody and hang out now. And let's say they're even a work partner and think
00:37:16
Speaker
It's just, there's such a barrier to it. this the The way it was when, when we were younger, where you just like hang out and be like, Hey, maybe we should, maybe we should do this. Uh, like when I was in a band, like maybe we should try this and you could spend four or five hours with people. And I didn't ever, I just, that was lost in my workplace. There just wasn't that creativity that it was just more task, task, guys checking their Apple watch guys, checking their phone underneath the fucking table. And.
00:37:45
Speaker
You know, right now you're in that creative upstart part of this where you guys are trying to figure out what to do. And eventually that might turn into just like task, task, task, chat, chat, chat. And I, man, I don't want that. I just don't want that in my life. um I'm sorry. I think that's, I think for what we're trying to accomplish here, that's up front. My next three or four months is going to be task, task oriented. Yeah. And I just gotta be disciplined about it. And then because it might, the the other side of it might be more you know, less task oriented, just more, more of this lifestyle, but with some, with some, some money coming in. Yeah. Do you think though that you actually you're sticking to the low hanging fruit because there's really no choice. There's no other choice. Like, I don't know. I'm just thinking there's a gap in your ability to connect with people on a day to day basis and like do something more meaningful. I mean, in the world.
00:38:42
Speaker
You, me, and the world, I think. Well, it's it's also like i um what I feel like I have enough connection. like with I don't know. I'm going to go play basketball tonight. That's fine. I talk to you. That's fine. I see my kids go to their practice, maybe talk to a parent. for I'm like, that's all I need. How much fucking connection do I need? you know like I hang out with my friend a lot. like yeah but by i don't I don't know. I don't i haven't i don't really have like right now these big picture issues that I think a lot of these fucking fat, stupid, idiot Americans. Just kidding. I just don't, I don't, right now, it's a snapshot in time, but I don't have this inner inner fight that a lot of people have in some of the more stressful environments. Like, I'm just not worried about my identity or any of that shit. And like, i maybe maybe I needed this sabbatical, so to speak, to get here.
00:39:40
Speaker
but i'm not I'm not that worried about it. I don't put fucking care. Did we just make up a POS statement for ratings then, bud? No, the only thing is like how do you, I do need to do something like how do I, I don't know, maybe maybe I shouldn't. like today I have stuff I need to do today and it would have been nice if I would have got some shit done between 7 a.m. and 10 a.m. because I knew I had to talk to you. After this, I got another meeting and then I need to actually teach English. I got a nice little schedule today.
00:40:09
Speaker
And in between that, I need to get some shit done, right? I got to teach English at four. I got you at, I think when we start 10, 10, 15, I have a meeting at one. And in between that, I need to, I need, and so I need to do fine table, a source of of like cheap table legs, probably in China, so we can mount some of these wood products on. And I should have done that, but what I did first was a little laundry. I watered some plants that I'm growing. Uh, I'm still doing that. And I, and I walked my dogs like an hour and a half.
00:40:39
Speaker
right All all this shit that sorta needs to be done, but like I had to do that first. And what I would like to do is figure out how to shift. like The dogs are gonna be all right. like I probably should have just put my head down for two hours and done the task this morning. and like So i need that's the shift that I'm worried about, not this big picture crap. like I just literally need to do that for like the next three months, make that raise that to the top of the low-hanging fruit. And I have a real hard time doing that.
00:41:08
Speaker
Yeah, but there's something behind that, don't you think? Yeah. like Well, that's why you're here, dude. Tell me. The burden of a decision. um I think it's probably. Yeah, the burden of decision. might like If you go look at, start to look at this crap, the rat hole's crazy. like Just to solve a simple task, I need to find metal legs that that we could we could mass produce. Not mass produce, but get at a rate that we don't have to sell sell our shit too expensive.
00:41:33
Speaker
And then you go start to look and you're like, God damn, there's, there's a billion options. And I got to make a couple of decisions and figure out if, if Lance, some guy in Colorado thinks that we'll buy our coffee table with, with this configuration of legs. They just have to figure that out. Do you have anybody you can talk to about it? That's what I'm saying. There's a loneliness about my partners and I'm talking to the guy who sells the wood. He's got a bunch of ideas and, and.
00:42:00
Speaker
Uh, but it's crazy, dude. Like these are things you're like, you're going to be like, that's ugly as shit. And then someone else is like, that's the look like. And so it's almost like, don't even ask anybody, just tell them, tell the people what, what they want. Well, sure. Whatever the case is. I'm just saying that in a lot of the tasks and activities we do, there's a loneliness in them. There's a, there's a burden of Uh, like this doing an, ah how the fuck would you know, how the fuck would Matt know what legs make the most sense by doing 27 year old girl in an apartment in Brooklyn? Yeah. Yeah. How would you know by doing a Google search? Like, of course that's a decision you'd want to avoid. And like, I'm just saying like that. I still think there's a gap in how we do work and and how we connect and how we, uh,
00:42:51
Speaker
work with, just just how we partner to get important things done. I think there's more time spent of just like slinging back details and sending emails and doing all kinds of bullshit. But do you think this is new? Like I don't, like, I don't know, like to get extreme, like Henry Ford had to make some decisions on the first guard. So like, I don't know if it's new just because of this streamline online economy and less, less actual personal interaction. These, these are, there are people that are just like decision makers in the world.
00:43:20
Speaker
And I'm probably not one of them and I need to become one of them. Yeah, maybe that's it. But I also think though that there's just more opportunity to to distract. And now you've we've trained our brains to just to do some of this small time bullshit and it's easy for us. It's like, why would I put basic reminders in my calendar?
00:43:41
Speaker
to do shit I do every week. It's just because I don't know what else to do. I haven't come up with, I haven't done any real thinking to figure out what I want. I haven't done any made any real decisions. um I'm just like, laundry? Oh, okay. It's somewhat because you're now like the, you're the more domestic partner now. Since since you don't have to go to the office all the time, you're in charge of like so much stuff and it's just like the tasks are necessary and you're the you're the one to do it. You don't have a maid.
00:44:09
Speaker
No, I always did all this stuff anyway. It's just more of, I don't know that, I mean, we're trying to put stuff in the calendar and feel productive. And I'm instead of, you know, this is stuff I'd get done anyway, but instead of- We got two different issues with this right now. I'm okay with being a taskmaster. I just need to get a couple of things done. You're still in this. All right. I've walked away from this other thing. And how do I feel like I'm contributing? You're still worried about it.
00:44:39
Speaker
i I'm not worried about that at all when I'm contributing to society or not. Yeah, I don't think you would worry either way. I know I am. That's that's the thing. I know just being myself, I am contributing. Oh, just because funny comments here and there. Well, just like I'm not a, at least I'm not a net, I'm a net zero to the world. I'm not taken away from it. I'm not the guy. Everyone's like, God damn, that guy's here again. And I'm not like,
00:45:06
Speaker
So I just think by that, yeah people will be like, I had a good experience with that guy and that's enough for me. Yeah, okay. But I but i just need to be productive strictly in the in the sense of let's make some money. and yeah yeah i've I've come to terms with that I think over the last year and a half because we started back when we were seniors. One of our first episodes was us bitching about jobs and meaningless jobs and all that crap, and I don't think I'm the same person. I don't really care. Yeah, you're not hung up on that, yeah. You're not hung up on about the passion piece. Right. But this this current idea, and even the weed, what I liked about is it still gave me that sense of like, there's you're making something. You're making something. like you're you're You're just gonna create something out of nothing and see if you're smart enough and driven enough to do it. I don't mean driven in that awesome,
00:46:01
Speaker
yeah way that entrepreneurs talk about. I'm just saying driven enough to check off the task that gets you to like ah point the point B. Like that's the craftsmanship, the deep work stuff I'm talking about. That's probably why I was appealing. um And I think songwriting has that for me, except for now, like ah for as an identity, it's like, what am I going to do with songwriting at age 49?
00:46:24
Speaker
and you have that that sort of, oh wow, that's worth your time. Why don't you go volunteer at Habitat for Humanity? So you have that that confusion, but I have friends. People dropping down trees from tables. Multiple friends here in the area who are like, dude, I'm just trying to get where you're at, bro. Everyone is, dude. I'm just trying to get where you're at. And I'm like, well.
00:46:44
Speaker
No, yeah, maybe. Yeah. I guess, I mean, I will say the trade off of like that stress of, of everyday grinding. I mean, this is way better. This is way, it's way better to sit here and spin about what's a meaningful life. Hmm. What books do I run a read this week? yeah Yeah. That, that, this is way better to think about this, but it's not perfect for me. I can, I can make, I kind of bucket it. It's like, and I mean this from the bottom of my heart.
00:47:14
Speaker
make some money, keep this show going as long as we can, because I just think, regardless, it'd be awesome if we had like 1500 episodes. I just think it'd be great. Like a decade worth of useless fucking conversation. Fit that in, which is important though, when you think about even the prep day and this day is like, would totally fuck up a normal work schedule, even this, right? That, and then it's like, after I figure out the make money, then it'll be,
00:47:44
Speaker
See my kids off to their labs and then surf as much as I can die. Yeah. I can have an end game. Yeah. I like that. I think there's a storm coming for a lot of working stiffs, which I would consider both of us about two years ago. There's a storm coming. It's a mental storm of like, who am I? And even if you don't like your job, I think there's a big percentage of people that are going to go, Oh my God.
00:48:13
Speaker
who, you know, what do I do? I don't know if that's like, um I'm useless. Do you believe that's a individual thing or a storm? ah Like, i I think that, I don't know, not to get too philosophical or spiritual. But like, when I think when people talk about heaven or hell, sometimes it's an individual thing.
00:48:32
Speaker
yes And the storm coming might just be someone wrestling and we're all like, we all wrestle with it. And and we're at that age now where everyone around us is. I think like people are already wrestling with it. They either are or they aren't. yeah And I don't know, you think, but what do you think it's like the world event that's the storm you talk about or is it is it individual? Oh no, I think it's it's it's an individual thing. I think there are societal pressures though on what it means to be contributing in a meaningful way. There's there's standards there.
00:49:02
Speaker
and I think people struggle, like earning money in the US, for example, is a cop-out, in my opinion, to any sort of discussion or thinking about who you are, what your identity is. As long as you've got a job and you're earning money, you've got purpose, right? That, that to me, is the one of the bigger issues in America, where, you know, some of the European countries, I'm gonna sound like a liberal idiot, but like,
00:49:29
Speaker
The gathering of people on a social level, the going on holiday, all of that takes a bit more priority. They work, they definitely work, but that takes a bit more priority and I think I would much prefer that. I'd much prefer like being in Costa Rica, having a group of friends with you and we're maybe even doing some business ventures together.
00:49:53
Speaker
that aren't super stressful, but also doing some things here and there. And, uh, and you got a bit more community. I think we just, we really think we have purpose in America when we have a job. Yes. And, uh, I think so people, the storm is coming for people. I just wondered the storm is coming because a lot of, a lot of jobs just start aren't going to be relevant, but you're things getting efficient and streamlined and like, true.
00:50:20
Speaker
All you really have is a few people making decisions and a few people coding it and and that's like, that's it, you know? right I wonder about that but but but that's alright, you know? like there's always these these There's always these shifts that change changed jobs. At some point, the horse buggy driver became obsolete.
00:50:43
Speaker
I think Karl Marx predicted that capitalism or somebody did. i Maybe it was Adam Smith, the wrong philosopher. No, I think they predicted that eventually we'd reach a level of leisure time. It was like four to one, 10 hours work, something like that. We're pretty close, dude. If you've been in the office in the last five years,
00:51:04
Speaker
You got three or four people grinding hard, usually like a director of ops or somebody like that. And then, or a quality system person. And then everyone else is like, whatever, you know, like sharing. Six emails. Memes. Yep. Now I know. I'm a vo spring guy talking about the weather bit like that. But boy, this one, this one is not a laughter, huh?
00:51:34
Speaker
What this episode? Yeah. I think it's fine, bro. No, I know. I'm just saying it's not a laughter. I don't, I don't necessarily think that there this is a, this POS issue is a problem. Like if you see people, the only thing ah you can worry about, if you see people that have retired early and, and almost feels like they've lost their mind or lost touch with reality a little bit, like they get into this task oriented thing and they, and they kind of like,
00:52:02
Speaker
It becomes ultra important. Like it's like usually older people, but like their, their day, their routine becomes ultra important because it's like the only thing they can have control over and and they lose their mind in that. We'll be like, I'm not, I can't see the grandkids today because I today's the day the newspaper comes. Oh no, I got it. I got to go to Costco at 10 AM when it opens because otherwise the crowds get out of control. on Yeah. You don't want my dad goes to get gasoline like Like that's the thing. I was like, you don't go get fucking gasoline when you leave the house sometimes and your car just stop and get gasoline. So that's the task for him. Yeah. Yeah. big I'm going to go get, I'm going to go fill up my tank. It's like, why?
00:52:41
Speaker
You're gonna go fill up your tank come back and then gotta go to King super's gotta go to the grocery store and it's like but I In that I've saw that with a few other older people in my life where that those tasks became ultra important I think Psychologists for one of them was like yeah, think about it. they They're losing control their bodies They're losing control their minds are losing control their financial stuff as their kids need to manage the only thing they can manage is their that routine checklist. So I think the fear for you and me or or anyone like who has some flexible and freedom is that that happens to you a little earlier than it should if you don't keep yourself engaged. That might be an issue that we have to worry about. but ah Yeah, I don't feel that quite yet, but yeah, I hear what you're saying. well you still I mean, you're still a dad. You're still like managing a family. It's like, OK, when that all goes away, then what do you manage? right like What do you manage to keep yourself tight?
00:53:39
Speaker
when they lead you. but like yeah i mean you're a You have a kid in high school, dude. You're not like an 80-year-old. You you know you you got two one kid in high school, one out of high school. But like still, young kids, you got so you're not ah you're not in jeopardy of losing your mind yet. but Actually, I don't think I will. I don't think I will, for just as a personality trait. I'm more of a free-flowing guy in that sense. But I do avoid some of the bigger things that I'm interested in.
00:54:09
Speaker
because they Could you get lost in routine though? mean You're not going to lose your mind, but could you just get lost in that or have you? Yeah, I could. I guess I could. I guess I could get lost in like some of the things that you have to do in the week. I just don't know that they'll make me feel productive. I'm okay with that though. Like dude, honestly, if a whole morning is filled with working out when I'm 65, 70, fuck. Yeah. um Yeah. Everyone's kind of shower you with affection. Fucking awesome. you'rera Yeah. You're amazing, right? Like,
00:54:39
Speaker
Well, that's, that's also, that's also like, uh, part of it. Then you spend people, people kind of going down the right path or then you see like, I gotta get my walk in, you know, I gotta do my gardening. And that's like, that seems like a healthy way of being addicted to a routine place. Right. How was that? And how is that less healthy than like, gotta put food on the table, which I always laugh at. Right. Cause now three quarters of the U S is obese. No.
00:55:09
Speaker
No, you don't. You don't need to put food on the table. You take that shit off, boy. youre We're not going to anyone over 3% body fat is not going to like the show. i mean we own This show is specifically for people with the Van Der Holyfield 1993 body types. Specifically, yeah. And ah and ah it's more of the US, it's just a caricature of ah reality. Well then, what are you sweating, dude? It sounds like you got you have ah a routine that you like, you have a little bit of community interaction with the coaching. like Why can't you just be like, it everything's great? What are you wrestling with? Or is it just for this episode we had to come up with something?
00:55:45
Speaker
Yeah, I think it's that. No, ah I think we have the same problem, different long-term goal is, yeah, I'll use some of the day-to-day tasks to avoid some of the more exciting things that I said ah that I wanted to do. Right. You're on the path though, it's not that bad.
00:56:09
Speaker
Yeah, yeah, sort of, sort of. Yeah. I just get a, let's get a call to action a little bit here. Cause I got like, you mentioned reading. I would, I, every day I'm like, this is not like I'm going to become a, I I'm like, I should do 15 minutes of studying the Italian language every day. And I have not been able to do it. That's not a production thing. This seems like, so like a culturally enriching thing. And if i agree I make it back to Italy, I would love to be able to communicate with a little bit. Why can't I do that?
00:56:38
Speaker
Yeah, that's a good point. Like, and why can't I put on my calendar? Because anything, here's a great thing or something like that. Yeah, the great thing about me is if I put it on that thing, I will do it. And why don't I? What is that thing? It's an app or phone? Yeah, it's just my Google Calendar. I've always been that way. Second you look at it, you immediately start scrolling something else because you got your phone in hand.
00:57:00
Speaker
No, I just do it. Like I've always been that way. Like if I had a project in college, I'd put on my little planner thing and I would chip away at it. I was not like that kind of last minute guy. So if I put it on, it'll happen. I just don't put on the things that I... I want to do because it's then I have that feeling of being over scheduled. Maybe that's it. It's the tension of like, if you put it on, you know, you're going to do it. But do you really want to do that? Because it'll stress you out. God, this is sounding so pathetic, but whatever. Probably should just put songwriting on there. I should put songwriting on my calendar two, three times a week. This is the number. This is probably the most relatable thing of anyone.
00:57:41
Speaker
Like how many people you talk to like, I got these things I need to do, but I just can't get around to doing them. It's like everyone. um Yeah. The other thing I thought about is doing personal training kind of fits my personality because of the schedule you can pick and choose. Um, just the rate people. Yeah. Just be like, come on, come on. Your shoulders are soft. Who has soft shoulders? Yeah. You, you're a, you got dumpy.
00:58:08
Speaker
That dumpy can. yeah yeah One thing to think about though is like you have this thing. A lot of people don't have anything to do. You have this great thing, like the ability to play music and write songs. And one way to look is like, why am I not taking advantage of that skill? I think probably because I think the age I've gotten to an age where it's like, you're a sad fuck. If you think anybody wants to hear your song, put that into your lyrics, bro. but that was sad fuck Old fuck.
00:58:41
Speaker
Shrinking cock. Yeah. Anyway, i can cock fuck like, oh, right, right. Write a bunch of songs about erectile dysfunction. And I bet you you'll you'll be huge. You know what I think could get me going as a comedy like a sort of a satirical comedy type album, although I don't really know what's funny anymore. But I think that could get me going on just writing some silly sort of left field shit. It's like I like the songs, the comedy songs that they sound really serious. And then all of a sudden he's talking about
00:59:14
Speaker
putting his fingers in his butt. There's there's people make it doing really well with that genre. Like people that are entertainers, they kind of understand that thing but they just go out there and talk shit to the crowd but they're playing an instrument and and singing funny shit. That element of surprise is never never gets old, like you said. It happens ah ah du it happens in Christian Rock too.
00:59:37
Speaker
was a Denver comic pad a joke about how you get tricked into like, Oh, this is a good song. This is this is dope. And all of a sudden, it's like, Jesus, I need you in me, you know, like the the it'll switch over to Christian Rock. It's the same thing. to do I am trying to figure it out. Exactly. And then it's like,
00:59:58
Speaker
He will help me, Jesus. And you're like, fuck. Or a letdown. It's a great riff. It's a nice ah alternative energy at the outset. And then you hit me with Jesus. Fucking assholes. That's what you got to harness that, Lance, but into the comedic. But you already do that. You're already doing that with this show. The few songs you put down on vinyl for us have a are are in that parody sense. Yeah, but how do you take yourself seriously doing that all day, man? This is a problem, bro. What do you need to take your yourself seriously? I should be fucking at the soup kitchen, bro, serving homeless. Dude, you know what?
01:00:39
Speaker
There you go. There's the formula. We always take a homeless as or are or disabled people, you like you can't fuck with them so that they don't get the joy. Like you would fucking sing to me some stupid song about whatever, but you wouldn't get the soup kitchen, you wouldn't do it. You'd be like, you got to be like, how are you? How are you? Maybe they want you to fucking talk about their cock and sing and treat them like normal people, Lance. Just treat them like you would anyone else. Maybe, dude. You would be fulfilled.
01:01:08
Speaker
They would be like, I like this crazy fuck. I'm going to get my shit together. You should see me. You should see me at the basketball and games now. I have, I have, uh, my son's game. No, my son's games. I've, I've committed to trying to stay positive. And the only way I can do it is to cheer. Just like we were talking back and I used to do in high school, really like I will jump up and fucking double barrel, the three sign. i Just go crazy for every kid, not just my own. But that's really helped me have have a good time. But also, like I know people are like, what the fuck? what You got any feedback there? People are like, you have you have me going in there, Lance. I've got some positive of feedback. It's like, I'm like, dude, look, I'm trying i'm not trying to be a negative this year. And this is the only way I know how to do it, is to just cheer for the kids. how the saying Say crazy shit. taking it
01:02:00
Speaker
ah She likes it actually, she thinks it's better. but Charlie, Charlie loves it. He loves it. He's just looking at you laughing. I don't think he's, I just think he sees we're excited and that like pumps him up. yeah He's probably in the game. He's not worried about if you're doing the three signer. But I don't want to sit with the other parents being like, why the fuck isn't he shooting? What the fuck? Why? God, he needs to go stronger to the hole. Fuck. Oh God. Look, move your fucking feet. Move your fucking feet.
01:02:24
Speaker
I can't do that. That's the, that's it right there, dude, right? In this, in this routine, find your, find your own, your own voice and then everything's fine, which would be the same thing at a fucking slabs work environment, right? Keep talking shit. Find your own voice. Find your voice, dude. There it is. We got home. A minute six, an hour is slow.
01:02:46
Speaker
We got home baby. He hit that three in your face. You getting up like getting in the front like ah on the sideline going up and down and run up and down the stairs or like I'm standing up almost fell down last game. Almost fell down last game.
01:03:00
Speaker
But I want to start, I want to get my true voice. It's like, oh yeah, he just blasted you in your face. He slung that cock up in your face, boy. Get the mic or the blow horn you used to bring to the games. I like you what you could do when we when I went to see your son play, on there was kind of all the parents were on one side of the gym. And on the other side, it was kind of, I think the band might've been there, maybe the cheerleaders, but then there was some some open area where no one was there. You can make that your stage where everyone's looking at you from the other side of the court and you're just by yourself.
01:03:30
Speaker
Hooten and Hollerad over there where we sat. Remember we sat in the front with like my kids and. Oh, that was like a Saturday afternoon, a weekend game where people don't come. Yeah. Yeah. No, I did do that at JV and this kid, I'm going to go back and see him tonight if I feel all right. But he scored 36 points on JV. and I was like, I'm coming back to see you Tuesday. 36. Is he getting a round on varsity?
01:03:57
Speaker
He's uh, he hasn't no and i've been advocating for him like subtly through the channels at any level is not as hard Yeah, he just hit like seven for nine from three and and he's but he's he's a junior. He shouldn't be on jv That's crazy, dude, and he's a little slight six Yeah, so he struggles on varsity because it's like people can guard him there. Uh, but I think he'd do still do a good job and he's a great high culture guy, but he's fun to watch. So you freak on that. You're freaking on that. I freak on all that. I used to go to the varsity games before my kid was playing. And even when he was in eighth grade and I'd still nobody stands, the parents are so lame.
01:04:36
Speaker
I stand up, I throw the three sign. I like jump up for a big ah assist plays or or any definitely any kind of dunk. Parents just sit there like, meh, meh, meh, meh. I can't stand up. My hips hurt. Make white comments. We need more ball movement. We need more ball movement. I just wish they'd pass. There's some about white people in basketball that have have such a passion for more than like, gotta get more touches. got it Gotta to pass the ball. it's like just give it to the kid who's a fucking great athlete and let him dominate. It's like if you had Alan Iverson on a suburban white team, all the parents would still be like, he just doesn't pass the ball. It's like, well, he did go for 78 points. So right why don't we just let him run? Yeah, so you're trying to put some soul into into the stands of
01:05:26
Speaker
that that white bread heist. I mean, my wife just thinks I'm getting more, like the further I've gotten out of the corporate world, I'm i'm i'm just getting more, what do you call it, disinhibited and crazy. And like I'm forgetting how to be around people in a professional way and I just feel like I'm getting back.
01:05:44
Speaker
to L.A., rah, my L.A. bitches. Yeah. my She's like, oh, God, I've been there before. Here we go again. But here's the question. Is that at this age? OK. Is that OK? Yeah. Is that rational anymore? Is that you starting to look like the fucking lost middle age idiot clown of the community? Is it but is there any like could you go and Is it good or bad to go why don't you not worry act like you would if you weren't if you were if you're single, what would you be doing? And then would you have any inhibition if somebody wasn't being like, hey, dude, that might not be cool when you're 49 with a family or not that that's what she's saying but like, you know, is the idea like are you just went, you know what, I can
01:06:36
Speaker
I can do whatever I want. um I can control. them i I'm not going to embarrass anybody, but I don't care how this affects what people think of me because this is how I like to be. Yeah, that's all I am. Yeah, she just she encouraged. Yeah, that's what I'm saying. Like, that's the balance. Like the ideal thing is like Lance, be yourself. But then now you're and you're now you're in a marriage, you're in a marriage, and you have a family where you're like, well, how's this affect the people around me? Right now, maybe maybe that's why I feel so free, not worried about my identity, because it's not gonna affect somebody else necessarily, like a social situation. I mean, I don't go fucking nuts around my kids, but but but I'm also myself around them. I don't have that, it's funny though, I was on stage for like 15 years, but I don't have that spirit of showmanship that you have either. So I don't have that like public display, yeah.
01:07:25
Speaker
I'll speak whatever I want. That's what will get me in trouble in my mouth. But I don't have that. You're more physical, physical comedy showmen that I don't have. Let's just say the wife glared at me more than a handful of times this weekend. that Does that make you happy? Like does it make you laugh in a way? Like you like putting her in that situation just to loosen her up a little bit? It makes me laugh. It does make me laugh. But she's She hasn't gone anywhere by now. She's probably not matt going to. it's like But does she see them? She's like, yeah, these people are lame. Someone needs to do it. Does she have any of that? Or she's just like, wish it wasn't you?
01:08:04
Speaker
ah Like the comedy thing, I remember early on in seniors, it was like, i she has a good sense of humor, can laugh at dark shit, just not that excited when it's her husband. Is there some of that? Yeah, there's some of that. But like, I'll say things to people we don't know very well that just most people would say, you do the same, mine's just probably a little more, I don't know, crude. Shot through the heart, bro. Not as comedic. um and um'm ah I'll just say things like, if these motherfuckers don't play, I'm gonna pull my pants down.
01:08:37
Speaker
I'm gonna pull my pants down. Just the people you don't know, they're gonna see my front stuff. I'm gonna whip it out. They're gonna see my front stuff if they don't play hard. I just say stuff like that that like doesn't, it's not appropriate. Are you conscious in that moment? Yeah, like I'm conscious, I love it. It gets people laughing, it gets people like. But you can't stop it either, right? No, I can't stop.
Involuntary Humor and Social Awkwardness
01:08:58
Speaker
It's coming out. It's like a Tourette's, it's like a tick. Yeah, yeah, that's what I mean. You're conscious, but I just mean like you're not making a decision in that moment, it's coming out.
01:09:06
Speaker
No, I'm not trying to do anything. I just kid just comes out. Like if I was trying to do that strategically, ah that'd be weird. I could see ah I mean, I could see I don't think she's being too ridiculous, where she's kind of like, ah Come on, absolutely. Yeah, I agree stuff with a high school basketball game. But it's clearly move it out loose up. Loose it up. Come on.
01:09:30
Speaker
It's so funny though. would What's great too is that it still has like that immature high school dichotomy where if I was there, she'd be like, I would just be sitting there giggling. Just like, you know. I just think with middle aged, yeah. yeah With middle aged people, there's nothing better than immature sex stuff that like really, may I like making people feel uncomfortable.
01:09:49
Speaker
I mean, I would probably say something like, well what if we got a couple dildos and just threw them onto the court, bro? To a guy that's like in his 50s just to see you see how area he reacts. That's my joy. And he's like, oh, I don't know about it. You know what this guy said to me? yeah But you know what's the best though, when it happens, when somebody's got the comeback and it's almost better than your thing where he, you're just, you almost like are stunned. They almost shut you up.
01:10:18
Speaker
was like, how about we are, you know, and they they get into it. And then you're like, damn, damn, how about a sex doll? We should just throw a sex doll out there. You're like, Yeah, anyway, I think I like I actually just did it now. My basketball group. I like like ah that sort of the old like, I don't know, Bob bill Upper West Side Jewish comic entertainers like the 40 where the sex they're like really take home stock jokes, you know, like take my wife or like just sex like this crude this simple sexual jokes. I love putting that shit into any conversation. I just did it today like we're somebody we're trying to I don't know there's a list of people are going to play basketball.
01:11:04
Speaker
And there are a couple, like we had too many people. So there's like a couple people that are on the, on like the wait list. And I was like, let them play. It's Christmas. We all know that some people are going to, after 15 minutes, they're going to have to like take a break or something like that because you know, like the people are out of shape.
01:11:20
Speaker
And then somebody made another joke about it's it's not 15 minutes and kind consecutive or something like that. And I put, that's like me in bed or or something like that. And then it was just a dumb joke, but I love interjecting those jokes over and over and over again.
01:11:36
Speaker
It's not quite as dramatic or or physical as as some of it were. No, you do that all the time. I mean, it could we could be in the most serious conversation. yeah That's what she said, Steph. I love it. You love it. It's just so immature. are People are like, that's not highbrow comedy. It's like, nope. And go fuck yourself, man. I still think the adolescent comedy is the funniest. Yeah. it' it's still It's still great. I will say, go watch Chris Rock's SNL.
01:12:03
Speaker
monologue. He's still fucking awesome, dude. Wait, what? Like a new one? He just did one. Yeah. You can just see it on Google. I just think he's funny. He did stand up. It's all current events though. So it's like he just wrote it for that situation. I just thought it was great. Anyway, we should wrap, dude. We didn't do shit on this piece of shit. No, we did. We got it. We got home.
01:12:26
Speaker
I think though you there' what you all that shit you just said, there's there's like some solace in that. If you're still doing that, you're fine. like That hasn't been taken away from you. Yeah, there's conflict there. It's like, hey, you want you coach kids. Yeah, that message needs to go away. Yeah.
01:12:45
Speaker
Cause what would you, what okay. I guess the decision is that, that idiot, you want it like, is it more important you to be that idiot or is it more important to coach kids because it's more important to be that loose Lance then who cares if someone took away coaching and be like, that's all right. I could still talk about deal. Those are the high school basketball game and everything else is just taking or leave it.
01:13:08
Speaker
Yeah. Water under the bridge. Yeah, I know. The visual on that is pretty funny. Just a bunch of giant dildos being tossed out onto the basketball court with no explanation and no, for no reason. Like every time a kid hits a three,
01:13:24
Speaker
That's your thing that you're you're doing. Those are the visuals I love to think about. Yeah. It's like a
Critique of Public Figures and Holiday Reflections
01:13:29
Speaker
bunch of parents bringing sex toys and throwing them on the court. Those are the things that give me great joy to think about lots of different stuff. um Well, dude, you don't have to be the parents in this day and age, right? Kids are getting crazy, bro. They're getting crazy. They're actually kind of pussies in that sense, though. ah So, but yeah, we got a, uh,
01:13:51
Speaker
Yeah, we got a rack up wrap it up because I'm gonna go to go or organize my parking space and then go take the dogs out Let me see what I got on my list. Oh Contribute to Sarah's Roth IRA. Yeah Fuck yeah. Fuck. Yeah, that's a good one. You know that's on your list. So it's getting done. She's getting paid right Because it's on your calendar. What about check Yahoo? Oh We have, but I think tomorrow, the 18th, the Fed makes a rate hike rate hike or rate lowering decision, right? You got that on your list? Dude, your boy that look, if you look at Yahoo right now, your Nvidia guy is front and center with that stupid leather jacket on. Let me see. Stop showing that's not his fault. Well, that's all he there he is. Oh, that's true. That is all he wears. I don't mind it, but it seems like he's trying too hard to be the tech cool CEO.
01:14:47
Speaker
Why are CEOs so their image conscious is so forced all the time? What would a CEO do in this situation? Like they wake up and say that every morning. Like we don't we don't we're never going to be though that guy. And so we don't have to worry about that's kind of what I've come to terms with too. If I if I if I start getting real task-oriented and real driven in this company. I'm never gonna be this idiot wearing this leather jacket and worried about my voice and my outward presence. I don't fucking care. So I don't have to worry about it. Good night, ladies and gentlemen. Good night. Well said. All right, dude. When's the next... I'm excited to... By the way, my last show is a 47-year-old. Oh, yeah. When's the next... What are we doing next week for our listeners?
01:15:36
Speaker
When we, are we going to do it? We got it. We can't, we have to keep going, right? Yeah, we'll go. All right. Yeah. I'm going to stop. Well, you want to tell them what we're doing? Cause we don't know. Well, I just want the world to know that we don't plan on stopping over the break. Okay. I'm sure that's a task. That's a task, bro. I'm sure their anxiety dropped. Well, how are you going to, these, these people are going to need us next week, more than ever a cup, like what, two days straight with the family.
01:16:01
Speaker
They need POS. So we're going to give it to you guys. We're not going to give it to you. Let's do that topic that we've been putting on. How do you show up for relatives? I mean, there's a chameleon thing we do with different family members that we're not sure what the source of it is. And we feel like we have to act in different ways around different family members. If you listen to us before you see the family, I want you to think about it too.
01:16:28
Speaker
both of you listeners. Come on. That's a POS challenge. Yeah. Yeah. Once you think about are you are you yourself? Are you dildo tossing? Steve from Seattle? Are you this? Oh, things are good. There's 15% growth at my company and things are good. Do you do you clean it up around around the in laws around the extended family? Are you yourself?
01:16:51
Speaker
ah It's kind of funny because my boss was sort of like saying that I need to work on, you know, time management skills. And I'm like, bro, those kinds of conversations. Yeah, bro, I just want to I just want to kite serve. Yeah. And yeah, all right. That's a challenge. We'll we'll talk to you guys next week.