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Who are you without the rules and conditioning they gave you?
33 Plays19 days ago
You were handed a script you never auditioned for and they've been counting on you to perform it perfectly ever since. My good friend and expert guest Charmaine Diallo founder of Recall Truth, are pulling back the curtain on the programming used to keep women small, and checking in with ....
- The threatening programming we need to talk to our daughters about
- Why the Divine masculine is needed to fix some things and reshape the balance
- Why your sexuality is a threat and played on to keep you in roles you didn’t ask for
- Why perfectionism in your role is a form of control and strips you of your safety
- Is it ok to not be nurturing? Are you still a woman? Still motherly?
- What is your worth as a woman tied to? Cooking, having children, something else?
- Where Parental control is coming from in many cases
- Who’s gaze might you be performing to and what to ask yourself to let that go
- Where you get to adopt some more “who cares” energy!
- Why it’s time to create your own table
- “Go ahead and walk off the witness stand”
To learn more about Charmaine's work, visit: www.recalltruth.com
✨ Done shrinking? The Phoenix Goddess Collective is where women come to rise. Book a call and let's talk. https://link.latoyazavala.com/widget/bookings/chatwithlatoya
Looking for more resources to practice your goddess energy? Visit my Stan Store: https://stan.store/latoyaz
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Transcript
Societal Structures and Role Imposition
00:00:00
Speaker
So it's almost like this. It's like we came into the world and we're open and we're, know, we're sponges and we're learning and we're growing and we're expanding. And then ah community, religion, village, society, matrix, aren they're like, and so here are some roles. Right.
00:00:20
Speaker
Please choose which ones out of the menu. These are your only options. These are your only options, right? Based on your anatomy. and yeah yeah um And so, and please be proficient in a B, and C. All at the same time.
00:00:37
Speaker
and All at the same time. Smile. be happy and smile. Yes. Well, at least make us think you're happy. We don't really care if you're happy.
Introduction to the Podcast and Hosts
00:00:49
Speaker
Welcome to Freed and Powered Up, the podcast. This space is where you, goddess, source energy, game changer, light seeker, trailblazer, and my sister or brother in arms, stay connected to your inner power and the divine feminine force us within you.
00:01:10
Speaker
Let's talk energy mastery, decoding, retruthing, and power activation. I'm your host and your sister, Latoya Zavala. Let's get it.
00:01:27
Speaker
Hello, hello. Welcome, welcome to Freedom Powered Up Live. Welcome, welcome. I'm super, super excited, everyone who's coming on, joining us live from wherever you're joining, whatever platform you're joining, joining in, Facebook, ah LinkedIn, YouTube, wherever you're joining in Welcome, welcome, welcome. I'm super excited for this conversation. i have talked to my friend, um live and on podcast before, and it's always been delicious. It's always been juicy. It's always been spirit moving. And so I'm really excited to have her on really as my first guest in a while um to just have and and a warm and cozy and um
00:02:11
Speaker
energy touching conversation. and just to kind of set the tone, she and I were just, we were catching up and we were ending the conversation and touched on a topic that when she said what she said, i was like,
00:02:28
Speaker
I feel like this gets to go live. I feel like this, we get to, we get to have community conversation.
Exploring Societal Roles and Expectations for Women
00:02:34
Speaker
And so whether you're watching live or whether you're watching on replay, hashtag replay, and you're watching love, would love for you on either wherever you are in hers or mine's or wherever, where you're wherever you're watching, would love for you to drop your comments, drop your questions, drop your experiences um so that we can, we can have this community.
00:02:54
Speaker
feel this community vibe um and just move forward as a collective. So without further ado, introducing my friend and my guest, Charmaine Jallot.
00:03:06
Speaker
Please correct if I didn't pronounce that correctly. Perfect. Perfect. Yay. Welcome to our conversation. Thank you so much for inviting the conversation and initiating it. I'm so excited to talk with you.
00:03:23
Speaker
um Yeah. Thank you. I'm excited too. I'm excited too. And I'll tell you, I'm i'm excited because this topic is so very near and dear to my heart. um It's so very near and dear to a lot of the issues that come up when I'm dealing with clients and I'm, I'm going to assume, but let me not assume, let me ask, this this is this the issue that comes up when you're dealing with your
Navigating Non-Conformity and Societal Expectations
00:03:50
Speaker
clients as well? Absolutely. Yeah, absolutely. it's I would say 90% of my clients, first of all, are female clients.
00:03:57
Speaker
um But the men that I work with as well, they are nonconformist many, many times, you know, just that they're in the space already. They're not conforming. Look at my face. Look at my face.
00:04:10
Speaker
oh Yes, ma'am. So let's talk about it. Right. Let's talk about the male and female energies and let's just get into the conversation. I have the title up there. Who are you without their roles and rules? And I'm very. um ah You know me and people who know me know me that I'm very careful with the words that I use. And so I really mean we could have said, who are you without your rules?
00:04:39
Speaker
Right. Who are you without your roles? But the truth is most often than not, they're not your roles. That's right. That's right. They're roles that we took on, right?
00:04:52
Speaker
yeah um And so it's almost like this. It's like we came into the world and we're open and we're, you know, we're sponges and we're learning and we're growing and we're expanding. And then ah community, religion, village, society, matrix, are they're like, and so here are some roles. Right.
00:05:14
Speaker
Please choose which ones out of the menu. These are your only options. These are your only options, right? Based on your anatomy. and yeah yeah um And so, and please be proficient in a B, and C. All at the same time.
00:05:31
Speaker
and All at the same time. Smile. And be happy and smile. Yes. Well, at least make us think you're happy. We don't really care if you're happy. Hmm. Okay, now we're...
00:05:43
Speaker
Hmm. No, now because I need that to be repeated. Like I need this to know. Yeah. I mean, that menu was handed to us, just like you said. Nobody checked in. Are you okay with this?
00:05:59
Speaker
Is this what you would like to do? It's like you look like this, you do this, and you look happy doing it or else. or Because what's really interesting about this is that
00:06:14
Speaker
If you don't look happy doing it, buth but then they're not happy
00:06:23
Speaker
with you doing it. Yeah. Well, we can't please them anyway. And when I say them, I'm talking about society, but, you know, maybe also our parents, my parents. Yes. um And maybe a spouse, you know, that you came into an agreement together and it was love.
00:06:42
Speaker
But there were all of these roles that were expected and, you know, it's we were raised. Let's not even dance. Let's just talk about the roles. You know what I'm saying? Let's put the list out there.
00:06:58
Speaker
are the roles? what's what are the roles what are the what's the What's the role? i mean my experience as a woman has been that I was expected to produce children. i was supposed to be beautiful to the opposite sex. I was supposed to do things that were attractive, but not too attractive. You know, be careful.
00:07:21
Speaker
And then be excited to be a mother. You know what? Let's just dip into not too, hey, DECU. Let's talk about that.
00:07:31
Speaker
attractive, but not too attractive. Not too attractive. That has been something,
00:07:39
Speaker
you know, ah that has been something. Okay. So that has been something that has weaved into my life. Yeah. Yeah. Right. um And I'll just say this. It's weaved into my life because I came from a very, very, very conservative denomination. Right.
00:07:53
Speaker
um Denomination of Christianity. And so there was always this dance of, you know, yeah especially because my parents are Jamaican. Right. So it is definitely look presentable. Right. don't you Right. you able to leave this house not look it presentable Right. Right. But then at the same time, not too attractive. Right. Cover up, you know.
Femininity, Masculinity, and Power Dynamics
00:08:15
Speaker
And what's interesting, because that like I said, very conservative. Right. i'm An extremely conservative um university for my bachelor's. So it was long skirts, cover up the ankles, cover up the shoulders, cover up the wrists. Like, yeah, you know your your neck is sexy. Your shoulders are sexy. Right. right You to understand what I'm saying? Yes. right That's more than I grew up with. But there was a lot of restriction. I will.
00:08:39
Speaker
So let's talk about the reason though. You're you are not supposed to be too attractive or too sexy. Why? Why? control the Control. There's power in femininity. There's power in sensuality and sexuality, and they must be controlled.
00:08:57
Speaker
And I really feel like that has to do with those other roles too. You know, control. Okay. Control. Let's get, we're going to, we're going to go there. There's so much. It's like, it's so juicy. It's so full. Right. I know.
00:09:11
Speaker
Okay. So, There's a lot of power in our sensuality. Oh, yes. In the divine feminine, in the feminine flow, in the the femininity of who we are. There's a lot of power there. And in the divine masculine, I don't mean to cut you off. No, no, yes. Everyone is talking divine feminine, and baby, I'm for it.
00:09:32
Speaker
But can we have some men stepping into their divine masculine? That would be so delicious as well. Extremely. Extremely. No, I guess it. Charmaine, calm down. ah I'm just going with you, friend. I'm just going with you. I'm writing it down because we're going to come back there. We're going to come back. Because I have heard the phrase and I've adopted it now and I use it in my work too in that what we have been, many of us, and I would venture to say most of us, what we have been dealing with was the wounded masculine.
Parenting and Societal Expectations
00:10:06
Speaker
Yeah. Not the divine masculine. Correct. Right. what we were hearing through the wounded masculine, the the masculine that need control, that needs hierarchy, that needs suppression, is that your sensuality is bad for me.
00:10:22
Speaker
Threatening. Yes. Threatening. Mm hmm. um And the way that it was translated to to me and people you know who come from like really restrictive religions and things like that was your your sexiness, yours your attractiveness, your sensuality tempts,
00:10:41
Speaker
right? It tempts them and usurps them, right? It beguiles them, manipulates them. And it's fault if something happens that's negative.
00:10:52
Speaker
Because you were too. But I also i just also want to add in and we can go back to that if you want to. No, let's. But i I also see a lot of programming and I talk to my daughter about it. She's young. She's 10. I still talk to her.
00:11:13
Speaker
And it's like a threat. As I'm like, your mother will get there. I know. But it's all there together. It is. And I will and i actually want to stay there because ah first of all,
00:11:25
Speaker
I celebrate you and, ah you know, and just really, I celebrate you and I uplift you because, you know, i think that is so important to talk to our, our daughters specifically, ah children, but daughters specifically. And I do the same for mine. Mine's only seven, but I, I think you have to, I think it it's because it starts, it starts super young, but it's not just if you're not attractive enough, it's,
00:11:52
Speaker
maintaining right man it's that maintaining of the attractive enough and you almost have to have two personalities two wardrobes in some cases you know there's the out one and then there's the in one okay hold on let's talk about this okay so now no no depends on what control your partner wants oh So what does the outer and inner look like? What does the outer inner look like? Well, for some people, it looks the same, right? There's some people that want to have their partner on display or they don't mind the person being in their sexiness, we'll put it, wherever they go. And I think that's okay.
00:12:33
Speaker
Whatever that person's reasoning is, maybe it's never been discussed. Maybe it has been discussed and it's like, you better or you better not. But my, another experience that I have seen is like,
00:12:47
Speaker
Be demure, be this in public. Yes. At home. And it wasn't communicated. Wasn't communicate. I had to figure it out ah by myself in my case.
00:12:58
Speaker
Something else meet at home. Yeah. do Something else at home. And you know what? That's fine. I like that. I'm okay with that. But communicate. and Don't get mad. When I get something mixed up or I wear the out in and in, out. and know Well, not only move communicate that, not only let's communicate that, but get I get now the chance to decide whether that actually is okay with me or not. right like Is that actually in alignment with who I am?
00:13:32
Speaker
yeah right Because what was happening with me in the early stages you know of dating and like seeing if this is the one or whatever, what was happening with me was felt made i felt made to dimmed down in public. right But then the problem with that is that your eyes are straying.
00:13:56
Speaker
Why can't I?
00:13:59
Speaker
i on my wi is a yeah i'm saying and you know to some extent I'm okay with it because I do actually like to kind of dress modestly I like I'm I'm curvy and I do like to wear things that fit but I don't like too much and I think it's you know my experience I was raised in a restrictive household it wasn't based on religion
Archetypes and Identity Struggles
00:14:24
Speaker
it was like putting on a show, to be honest. There was a lot of fakeness when I was growing up. I love my family, but there was a lot of what other people are going to think.
00:14:35
Speaker
Yes. I grew up with that too. You know what? Cause I'm going to embarrass my friend. right Okay. That's fine. You know, but it wasn't so much. This is against this is a sin or anything. It wasn't that standpoint, but when it was time to to church, you better be dressed right.
00:14:52
Speaker
You better be trying that. Right. I got yelled at for wearing hoops. Ah. Because looked like I was going to the club. Yeah. Some hoops. Yeah.
00:15:04
Speaker
Just hoops. Right. I mean, you know, something like this. Right. I looked like I was going to the club. To the club. And what's interesting, you know, and we don't have to know. The going to the club was okay, by the way. It was okay.
00:15:17
Speaker
This is what I was going to Is that the deeper, deeper layers of that is... When am okay? You know, like, okay. You know what I mean? That's the thing. They want to keep you off, off balance.
00:15:32
Speaker
It's never okay. You have to, this is what they want. They want you to be afraid of what's going to happen if you don't do things perfectly. If you don't do things perfectly. That's control. If you're in fear.
00:15:45
Speaker
that you're not pleasing enough or you're too exciting or whatever thing that you have to be concerned about at that moment, you know, or you're afraid for your safety. I've been afraid for my safety. I'm sensitive and I can tell when it's not safe, you know, and I wasn't dressed in a provocative manner.
00:16:05
Speaker
Like I said, if you're curvy, there's also a double standard, you know, of what's safe and what's appropriate, et cetera. Absolutely.
00:16:17
Speaker
So on the table. Right. Yeah. like Absolutely. People with less curves, I'll say can maybe get away with more things and not be inappropriate. I'll leave that right there. Yeah. Or deemed, let's say deemed inappropriate. Right. Right. right Right.
00:16:35
Speaker
um Let's talk about what else is on the list. because It's a long list. that The thing i feel like that kind of got the conversation started was not being as feeling nurturing. I don't, me personally, I don't, I'm not a nurturing person. I'm very loving and I'm very affectionate.
00:16:56
Speaker
But to me, nurturing is feeling to want to, for example, hug someone When they haven't started to hug you already. Just natural feeling to do that. I get that so infrequently.
00:17:14
Speaker
And I thought something was wrong with me. First of all, I did not grow up with affection. I think it's come from slavery because children and parents were separated. And so it was like, I can't get too close to you because you might get sold away.
00:17:29
Speaker
And I don't think anybody in my bloodline worked on it. And my parents have even said, yeah, we weren't affectionate. We didn't say we loved you. We didn't do this, didn't do that.
00:17:40
Speaker
And I'm an affectionate person. So that was uncomfortable. But I don't just, I'm going back to the nurturing now. When I see my daughter, i don't always just want to like, she's home from school. I just want to give her a big hug or I want to kiss her. I'm happy to see her, but it's just a lot of touching really wears me out. It drains me. And I'm an energy worker. I know how to protect myself from other people.
00:18:04
Speaker
Taking my energy and, you know, all those types of things. That's not the problem. The problem is I just don't want a lot of contact. I don't have a bunch of friends, you know, just me and my husband and my daughter. And that's all I can handle.
00:18:18
Speaker
I don't think I could even handle another child. I'm not going to I it's that's my capacity and God yeah has given me what I can work with. But I used to think that was wrong with me. And I started studying archetypes and understanding personality types. And there's so many were women, some of them are considered positive, some are considered negative. Yeah. But the only two that I've known about before I started studying and the two that were celebrated to me were the maiden and the mother.
00:18:52
Speaker
and the Nobody knew. Well, I shouldn't say nobody knew, but nobody was celebrating. Let me go back. Like, for instance, the I don't know what the female one is called. guess like a a goddess. Sorry, the goddess, which is what I am. I have that archetype a lot. Very introspective. Spend a lot of time alone. lot of self-work.
00:19:14
Speaker
Alone, alone, alone. That's my thing. So. I was expected on several occasions to be excited when someone's bringing a child. I'm supposed to be interested in holding child, wanting to play with the child if they're that age.
00:19:33
Speaker
Never. i never want to hold other people's children. i never want to play with them. I'm not interested. I love people. was five years and I really got an appreciation for children, but I still, i don't want to hold your baby.
00:19:52
Speaker
Keep him over there. I don't. I will hold him so you can eat. I will hold him so you can do whatever you need to But don't ask me to babysit. And i I pay people to babysit my child for that. I don't want to watch. Wow. Now my daughter's old enough. She can like keep kids entertained and they can kind of play with each other back and forth. That's different. But yeah like watch your child. What?
00:20:16
Speaker
No, please. I'll cook you dinner. I'll cook you in another way. I'm not nurturing. When I do get those rare, like, oo I would just want to hug my daughter.
00:20:27
Speaker
I do it. Because I don't know when it's going to happen again. And it's totally natural for my archetype. I'm a high mystic. All that lovey-dovey stuff is very concentrated and very focused. Yeah.
00:20:42
Speaker
I don't get it very often. I'm not saying I don't feel, like i said, I'm affectionate all that. But I don't, for my daughter specifically, my husband's whole different story. But my daughter...
00:20:54
Speaker
It's like I can only be that way with one person at a time. And it's him. Sorry. Wow. get wow yeah That's all I got. That's all got. And so this is really important because, um yeah, and in my work, we deal with archetypes too. But i I see it, you know, I do astrology chart work. And so I i can see it in that way in the cosmos and the planets moving and everything.
Traditional Domestic Roles and Personal Identity
00:21:20
Speaker
And this is one of the most difficult, I think, things for,
00:21:26
Speaker
o Particularly, oh, I'm not going to say that. Or people who,
00:21:35
Speaker
feel so strongly opposite
00:21:40
Speaker
to what's been projected. Yeah. You know, um like I've, I've worked with men who do feel that nurturing, who do like they actually want to play girls with their, with their daughter, right? They want to like me crazy.
00:21:59
Speaker
You know? I hate it. You hate playing dolls. like yeah I did it when I was little, but I don't want to do it. Yeah, I'm not the T person, you know? And I remember i watched um a coach and she was um talking with another life coach and she was like, okay, so I know that it's supposed to be done, she said, but reading books to the children at night, I like i really can't stand it.
00:22:21
Speaker
Right? and so it's But it's hard for people to say these things out loud. Right. Like particularly for women. to say I don't like cooking. Right. When the mantra was the way to a man's heart is through his stomach. Y'all can, y'all, you know, everybody, y'all can finish the statement. Y'all know what I'm talking about. Yeah. yeah You know, um i think it's true, but there are multiple ways.
00:22:47
Speaker
yeah Come on. There are multiple ways and that's what, that's what's not being said. Right. That's not, that's, so now you got to learn how to cold have You got to put your foot and in it.
00:22:58
Speaker
You know what I'm saying? You, Yeah. If you give people choice, that's right. Put your foot in it. It's gotta be chef's kiss every time. Really? And enjoy it. And enjoy it.
00:23:10
Speaker
Yeah. Enjoy yourself doing it. You know, it's funny. Certain parts of my cycle, I feel like cooking. um it's It's hilarious to me. And that's when I get my cooking done. Okay. So I got to share something. Let me share something. My son, listen, it is so well known in my house how much I hate cooking, right? Like,
00:23:31
Speaker
It's so well known that my son yesterday showed me reel of an interview with Aretha Franklin. And they asked her, what's one of the things that you you know that you do for yourself? you know Now as ah as a successful person, it's one of the things that you really don't like. And she said, cooking.
00:23:51
Speaker
but He said, I can't stand it. but Having to think every day what yeah what is what is for dinner. That's a part time job. it's a And it requires like creativity. And, you know, in my house, I got three children. I have a husband. five of us. This one don't eat that one. This one eats that one. Three people like this. Two don't. Right. It's like. I know.
00:24:16
Speaker
I really i don't like i i i i don't like the process. I don't i don't like cleaning up. The cooking itself would be fine if I didn't have to organize my pantry, do the groceries each week. ah Account for people taking things and not, I didn't know it, you know? Yeah. oh You have, you have to manage. It's not just it is walk in the kitchen and start cooking. That right probably would probably be okay. Right. But you've got to keep inventory.
00:24:49
Speaker
You've got to, like you said, plan. I got people don't want to eat the same thing two days in a row. Yes. yeah yeah They'll eat leftovers, but it's got to be like a couple of days later and I got to make sure it doesn't go bad. I mean, baby, this is, this is a lot happening. I'm vegetarian. So the people eat meat, you know, it's like, so I know what you're saying. I know what you're saying.
00:25:13
Speaker
I, yeah, I'm with you.
00:25:17
Speaker
So this nurturing piece, this, but it's okay. I'm feeling like I'd like to go here. Okay.
00:25:30
Speaker
Femininity and womanhood.
00:25:36
Speaker
And by counterpart, right. By design, therefore masculinity and manhood have been defined by roles and actions. Okay.
00:25:48
Speaker
Very tightly defined. Very tightly defined. And, um you know, I'm going to go here. I'm going go super deep, super quick, real. o Wait one sec, goddess, before we finish this delicious podcast episode. Let's chat.
00:26:04
Speaker
I know you, you've been doing a lot because you know you're here to have hella impact. So you've been doing the therapy, the YouTube manifesting practices, the business coaches, the mindset coaches and books and podcasts.
00:26:17
Speaker
And there's a spot that all that stuff is just not hitting.
Childlessness and Personal Worth
00:26:21
Speaker
It's not getting to the knowing and the being in your power, in your own authority over your time, your body, your emotions, and your money. Knowing without a doubt your purpose and when you're acting in it.
00:26:34
Speaker
knowing without a doubt how to be infinite potentiality and manifest all the damn wealth and peace and love that you're worthy of. I know you and I have the perfect experiences for you.
00:26:46
Speaker
There is no other place like the Phoenix Goddess Collective. You're going to embody, elevate, and emanate your magic, your God energy, your truth, and your legacy.
00:26:58
Speaker
We'll be diving into your soul path alignment through Vedic astrology, energy mastery practices, life transforming coaching, and all with an aligned sisterhood to hold, celebrate, and enhance your experience.
00:27:13
Speaker
Book a call with me with the link in the show notes and let's get you started. 2004,
00:27:20
Speaker
in two thousand and four ah the doctor told me, you're probably not going to be able to have children um because of what was going on with my uterus and cervix.
00:27:32
Speaker
And
00:27:36
Speaker
i grieved I mourned and grieved, right? Like the entire Latoya
00:27:45
Speaker
of that part of my life died. Died. Yeah. died And I like I'm when I say I'm talking about like what the Old Testament goes like sackcloth and ashes. Wow. wow Ugly cry for days and days, like mourning and grieving. And here's the thing. It isn't so much because I desperately wanted to have children. That's not that wasn't the case. It was because.
00:28:16
Speaker
So much in that religion and culture and upbringing was your value, your value, your worth to others. And I immediately felt worthless, immediately felt value. Somebody told me that when I was 20. Yeah.
00:28:34
Speaker
You know, somebody told me, girl, I think I might've had a party. Same. I don't, I don't understand, but I understand what you're saying about. Same. That's how I felt until I got married to someone who not only was connected to what I brought up with, but his culture. So my husband's Mexican, right? Okay.
00:28:54
Speaker
He's one of 10. Okay. okay Who? OK, so you already know. Right. Like when they told me that my husband and I were all married, we're already married for three years. And so his family's already like, what's the we should have had three already. Like what? What's the chop chop?
00:29:16
Speaker
Right. yeah I heard something similar to that. Yeah. So you want to wait till you finish your degree? What?
00:29:26
Speaker
But you're already married. What are you waiting for? ah Are you coming to babysit? Oh, when I had my first, my mentor's wife showed up at my door to help me out with some things. I was in the process of applying for um my master's.
00:29:48
Speaker
And she said to me, isn't having a baby enough?
00:29:57
Speaker
like you're That memory is photographic for me. o Wow. Right. So I'm speaking to it to say, you know, this, this, you know, we're talking about like these kinds of roles and, you know, projections as to what is your value? What is
Redefining Roles and Personal Fulfillment
00:30:18
Speaker
your worth? What is your purpose? Yeah. You know, and.
00:30:25
Speaker
ah Clearly it wasn't. Right. I, you know, clearly, yeah but this, this is kind of what we,
00:30:35
Speaker
what we, what we are, I want to say made, we're made to deal with, we're made to heal through, we're made to overcome, we're made to work through. And so I'm using this in this example, but there's so many things on the list and some of them are not even,
00:30:54
Speaker
I'd like to bring it here if we can, right? This conversation started because you were talking about the nurturing with your daughter. And I was like, say that. And I'm always surprised but when it comes up, how many people like be in the comments to be like, I can't stand cooking either. I can't stand watching this. last story I'm always surprised, right? But it's also true in different things in our lives that are not even like gender appropriated, right? Like,
00:31:22
Speaker
If you're running a business, you got you must do A, B, C, D. You actually should do it in this order. And you should feel this way when you're doing it. Yeah. yeah Regimented. Yes.
00:31:38
Speaker
Yeah. And what's an appropriate business to have as well? Okay. You are, this is a real business. Come on, come on, come on. This real business. This is this is professional.
00:31:50
Speaker
This is not professional. This is a hobby. Three categories that are needed. These are the three categories that, you know. So much control is back to control. You can control somebody.
Collective Trauma and Generational Roles
00:32:03
Speaker
You can keep them in line and they're going to act in a predictable way.
00:32:10
Speaker
And you get what you want. And you don't really have to put forth any effort when you're controlling this person because they're on automatic. They're doing what you say because they're programmed.
00:32:22
Speaker
That's the same thing they did with the slaves. The mothers programmed their children to behave and to do certain things.
00:32:33
Speaker
And it's trickled down. all the way through my family. And no it wasn't safe during the civil rights. We were programmed during the civil rights to act a certain way when we were around the other races because it was for safety and it made sense.
00:32:51
Speaker
When I was growing up, I was still raised that way, but it wasn't as necessary. The danger wasn't there. Jim Crow wasn't there anymore. Now my parents don't understand why I'm not programming my child To be a silent, thoughtless person that's just polite and friendly.
00:33:14
Speaker
They don't appreciate it. They think she's bad. Because she has her own ideas. Okay, so this is the second piece. yeah Because you operate outside of the rules.
00:33:27
Speaker
now you Now come the label. You're inappropriate. You're out of control. Out of control. Bad. What is the word? Too...
00:33:39
Speaker
you're You don't have to, whatever the word is. You're too bad. Too bad. Rebellious. Yeah, but you know what? My daughter tells me what the children are talking about at school. And I realized I needed to talk to her about some adult things that they were talking about at school. And if I had raised her the way that I was raised, oh she would have kept it to herself and she may have already tried some things that are for adults. And she's only 10.
00:34:07
Speaker
So it may not have had any repercussions right at this moment. But if she kept on trying it, it could be really serious. And I'm grateful that I have felt given her the freedom so that she'll still be, i won't say my friend, but she feels comfortable talking to me.
00:34:31
Speaker
She feels safe. Yeah. I didn't feel safe with my mom. There were very few times when I felt like I've pleased her enough that I can have peace. Yeah.
00:34:43
Speaker
and I mean, i there are things I won't talk with her about to this day, because whenever we discuss, I'm on trial, you know, it's not just two people talking, it's me talking to the judge. Right.
00:34:58
Speaker
You know? Yes. And I just know that and that's okay. And so that, but yeah, I'm, I'm one of those people that's non-conforming and I have a business around it and I,
00:35:11
Speaker
haven't fit into the appropriate professions category. Come on, come on, say that. I feel like more people need to hear that. Yeah, it's inappropriate to them. They're afraid because of their religion.
00:35:24
Speaker
They're afraid because of the culture. But guess what? I inherited my abilities from them. And I told them that. And of course they were they couldn't deny it. And really they've told me who in our family has abilities, et cetera, et cetera.
00:35:39
Speaker
but they are afraid, especially now as they get older and they think they're gonna meet their maker and They better do things right. Right, right. They don't approve. Well, and a part of that is because this is so good. This is so good. So juicy right here, right here, right here.
00:35:55
Speaker
Part of that is because they've lost a bit of control. but They've lost control over you. control and the need of control came from them feeling a responsibility and an authority over your life and over your salvation.
00:36:12
Speaker
can we Can we talk about parents? wanting to control their children because this is something I could never understand. And I just had to come to the conclusion.
00:36:22
Speaker
You tell me what you think, because I see parents going to tremendous lengths, we'll say, yeah to control their children's behavior. And then as they become adults and they're not responsible anymore, they're still trying to control behavior.
00:36:38
Speaker
child Yes. All I can imagine is that there gets some kind of boost, some kind of energy boost, some kind of power boost from controlling this person. Yeah. It's not love. It's not care and concern. It's not love. And I'm so glad that you said that because I feel like.
00:36:58
Speaker
I think it goes back to, I'm just gonna say collective trauma, right? for Because first some for so for our community, slavery, for other communities, colonialism and other things, right? So let's just say collective trauma. I feel like the collective trauma um
00:37:21
Speaker
warped o how we understood love OK. Right. So they think I think many of them think it's love, but really.
00:37:35
Speaker
It's still fear. It's still fear. And I and i believe, well I'll say for a lot of the things that I deal with in my family, and I will say for a lot of things that I deal with with with my clients, and especially if they come from some of these Western organized religions, right? Abrahamic specifically, that they do feel
00:38:01
Speaker
this rested weight of responsibility, okay, of your salvation, which really goes back to safety, right? Because yeah the warping of salvation is a whole nother, a whole nother topic, right? yeah But because if you're a whole adult right now, you're, you're, you're then wholly responsible yourself, right? I think you're being too kind. Yeah.
00:38:28
Speaker
kind I really do.
Embracing Non-Conformity and Empowerment
00:38:31
Speaker
If I'm over 18, you're not responsible for my soul. You're not, but they feel though. you have left young Yeah, I still it. Okay. So let me go back. If I don't be depend on them for finances, if I don't live with them, leave me alone.
00:38:47
Speaker
I love Right. There's a whole other thing too, which I'll say it's very, very deeply important. Caribbean, very deeply Caribbean, news um is shame.
00:38:59
Speaker
Oh, yeah. Yeah, yeah. Right? It's embarrassment. I get that. And i I think my parents, they were raised during the civil rights era and saving face was a big deal because there were African-Americans who got educated and they moved up and they were respectable citizens. And there were ah some of us who didn't.
00:39:22
Speaker
And we got into crime and got caught up, didn't get educated, et cetera. And so there's a divide and we don't want to be with those, you know, people, uneducated, whatever people we want to be over here.
00:39:35
Speaker
And don't you dare embarrass me. by acting like one of them people you know ok of no i was listen i i hope my father's not watching because um your mine is input i again i i was say hey re saving that of i want to say when i was younger okay i was one of those i was soft i was a soft child i was a you know i was one of the good children right i was that But i we came from the grocery store and I had asked my father to buy Doritos and he did. and it comes through the cash thing, right? bleep And I opened it.
00:40:15
Speaker
yeah And my father was beside himself. Are you serious? Wow. Oh, I i actually remember the four spankings that I got in my life. And that was one of them. Wow. And he was like, okay, so wait till we get home.
00:40:30
Speaker
And what it was. was it? was the appearance.
00:40:36
Speaker
you got me on gar hungg up yeah You got me out here looking like ah I don't feed you. i like You understand it? You're out here looking like you starving. Like you can't wait till you- I got in trouble for that kind of thing too. You understand? I remember I got slapped. It was really- and A thing of honor, right? It's a thing of perception, how it looks. That's what I'm talking about. It's so pervasive.
00:41:04
Speaker
it It's so pervasive. It's pervasive in parenthood. It's pervasive in your work. It's pervasive in your businesses, how you market, how you show up, how you, it's, it's so pervasive how it looks. Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm.
00:41:21
Speaker
It's so powerful. I promise you it's probably one of the, I would say it's probably the top five things that I work with even in my business yeah and that I had to work through myself. How it looks.
00:41:33
Speaker
Yeah. How's it going to look? Yeah. And you know what? I agree with you that that's there. And I agree that it's important.
00:41:45
Speaker
I do agree with my parents on that. I do try to present myself a certain way, but. I was also that child that I was arguing with the Sunday school teacher. this Come on. oh Why is this?
00:41:59
Speaker
Why is that? I was sitting there prim and proper, but I had questions and I was asking my questions. I was a troublemaker mentally. yeah I was good, you know, following instructions, but I had questions and you no adults could satisfy my questions. But especially at church, I was really like difficult.
00:42:25
Speaker
Got in trouble. Okay. I understand. I understand. I want to say the porch was a big deal for my parents too. That porch situation. The front porch. Yes. Listen, you're going to be acting out any kind of way. ah not on the front porch. do You understand?
00:42:41
Speaker
But i I do feel that Charmaine, that people who are here to really,
00:42:50
Speaker
To really make a difference, to really be trailblazers, to really break the mold that they were that way, that they were, ah you know, as God rest his soul, his name, John um
00:43:07
Speaker
Vita calls him all the time, um make good trouble. nothing I like that. Yeah. The civil rights movement. um of Okay. Oh, why is his name escaping me? We'll look it up. woo I'll get his name. But it comes to also, I want to, want to say this real quick. And what's interesting is as people are John Lewis, thank you, Vida, John Lewis. Yeah. He's, let's, let's go make some good trouble.
00:43:30
Speaker
Yeah. Right. Yeah. it It comes to that control that you were talking about. Yeah. Stepping on the line. give If you're asking questions, you might find different ways to be.
00:43:47
Speaker
That's why they didn't want the slaves to learn to read. Every little thing that I do different for my family. There was no Google when I became a vegetarian. There was no Google gray when I started wearing my hair natural. If it was, I wasn't using it, you know?
00:44:02
Speaker
Yeah. I had to read about it in a book or I had to go somewhere and talk to somebody that was different than who I grew up with. Or I just had to try it to see what happened.
00:44:14
Speaker
but just Check it out. h Yeah. yeah And I have done that so many times in my life and it feels lonely and it feels lonely. Not feminine. You know, there's usually community with feminine things, but it's just, it's a different feeling, but I'm a revolutionary.
00:44:33
Speaker
So come on. Sometimes you have to go first. Sometimes you have to go by yourself. Say that again. She said, I am a revolutionary. So sometimes you have to go first.
00:44:45
Speaker
First. And sometimes you have to go by yourself. Yeah. And sometimes nobody looks like you. I'm used to that. Yep. Yep. Yeah. And it's okay. it's And it's okay. and This is so important. This is so it's okay. What, what, what are we saying? It's okay. It's okay. You actually can be a fantastic mother and not love to cook.
00:45:07
Speaker
Oh, not like kids. not like Okay. Not like to be touched. I saw a really quick, um like a TikTok or something. This lady was singing.
00:45:21
Speaker
ah no, she wasn't singing. It was like an old song from like a hip hop song. And she was like, give me some space. Don't touch me. And her toddler was like all over her, touching her everywhere. And some people live for that. But it used to drive me crazy.
00:45:36
Speaker
I could do like, you know, a little, but it just was it was too much. And that was that. That was like, somebody's talking about it. You know, want to I'm going to I know we've been up here for a minute and I'm going to be ending soon. But I really i want to say this because I've said this. i've I've quoted her before. And I think this is a beautiful space to say it. Toni Morrison in the interview, she talked about how.
00:46:02
Speaker
when she was this when she was really deciding on her identity as a writer, move that she had a choice to make. There were other African-American writers, but she had a choice to make. She felt like most of them were writing to the white gaze. Mm-hmm. And i want to be I want to be clear here. I'm not, for everybody's listening, I'm not i'm not specifically speaking about African-American experience, right?
Overcoming Cultural Pressure and Finding Identity
00:46:26
Speaker
I'm i'm saying it in a way that I want us to understand that this is something we can translate to all spaces where you are feeling control. She she said, I feel like most of them were writing to the white gaze and I decided that I wasn't going to do that.
00:46:39
Speaker
It was part of my, her, she was saying, it's part of my identity. I decided I will not do that. number Right? I'm going to write to My people.
00:46:49
Speaker
And she got and and so there was some of that turn that question. OK, I probably won't be a bestseller. OK, I probably won't get a Nobel Peace Prize. You know, I probably won't get the Nobel Prize. Right. She was like, OK, but I'm deciding who my I am deciding who I am.
00:47:03
Speaker
Right. And then she ended up getting all those projects. Right. All those projects. She ended up getting all of that. Because she was herself. Deciding who she is. And I just want to say this because.
00:47:15
Speaker
i love that. In many parts of our lives, I'll ask the question, right? In your motherhood, in your fatherhood, ah in your nightlife.
00:47:27
Speaker
yeah well Well. Oh, well. You know, in your work, your life work, your business, is there a gaze o that you might still be struggling with,
00:47:49
Speaker
churning with, or even performing to? Yeah. You know, thing yeah. Yeah. ah When you're, you know, the pace at which your child learns more, how they behave m in public, in public.
00:48:11
Speaker
Right. Well, now they're terrible. Their timing is. ah when you're traveling and you're traveling with your, you know, your Oracle, your tarot cards and what, you know, the things that, you know, you're out there, you're making your reel or your, your video and you, you know, you're like, okay, I'm say that, but not going to use this word because whose gaze, whose gaze o
00:48:43
Speaker
are you still performing under? ah That's important to think about. I, like I said, I'm a shaman, I'm a mystic, and I had to get that. I had to get my parents' opinion, my family's opinion off my back.
00:49:02
Speaker
And all the fear that I was raised with, I had to get rid of it because... It had been six generations between me and the last shaman in my bloodline.
00:49:15
Speaker
So that was somebody back in slavery. That was somebody protecting themselves, working on themselves in secret. In secret. Okay. Maybe they brought it from the motherland. Maybe they learned it here, whatever.
00:49:30
Speaker
But they were the last one and their children didn't pick it up. mom but Not directly. right I don't know them. I never met them. and so Didn't pick it up or suppressed it.
00:49:45
Speaker
right bre Hit it. Covered it. yeah and I know you probably experienced, I experienced it my work too, that some of those people who are now, right like in this now, struggling a little bit, but like wanting to, um they experience outworkings They experience the manifestations of hiding it.
00:50:07
Speaker
Yeah. Yeah. Right. yeah Or covering it or suppressing it. Right. Right. Things they feel in their body. So for some people, pain. Mm hmm. um you know, for some people, pressure, for some people, different kinds of stress, for some people, right? Like there's a, there is a manifestation. There's an outworking. Oh yeah.
00:50:25
Speaker
Of suppressing. The body keeps track. There's a book called The Body Keeps the Score. The
Addressing Internal Conflicts and Self-Care
00:50:30
Speaker
Score, yeah. And true. It's true, yeah. The body holds on like a record to all of that.
00:50:37
Speaker
And you gotta, you gotta find a way to get rid it. The body's gonna keep on letting you know keep on giving you pain, keep on making you uncomfortable until you address it.
00:50:51
Speaker
Aspirin, no. okay ah no Oh, my goodness. And there's so there's so I'm just going to say this and everyone hear me clearly. I'm not diagnosing and I'm not saying don't do the things. i know Right. Right. Right. But we're self-medicating. dubo You know, we're self-medicating. We're in therapy for for decades and decades and decades. We're we're staying in marriages. We're we're. We're covering, covering. oh and step how I know. Somebody's toes hurt.
00:51:26
Speaker
Because that's real. And then saying, oh man, that i the therapy's not working. The medication's not working. The energy work is not working. No.
00:51:36
Speaker
What it is, is. It's not the right solution. It's not the answer. ah Right? Right. Yeah, don't stop going to therapy, but try this other thing.
00:51:49
Speaker
Okay? And if you feel better, say it's the therapy, honey. Who cares? I don't care. Oh, I love it. Who cares? Say it's the therapy. If you got where you were supposed to get, there we go.
00:52:04
Speaker
So can I just say this generally? ahead. Can I just say this generally? I think... we get to adopt some more who cares energy. Like really for real, for real, for real, for real. I remember when I was, listen, when I was in my military, I know this goes back to the cooking thing, but when I was in the military, so my first war.
00:52:26
Speaker
That's okay. I was on my first tour, right? I was single momming because husband stationed another place. and um And this was legit, right? I don't like to cook, but also it was a tough time, right? I'm on a call twenty four seven Things are blowing up where I work and all the things.
00:52:44
Speaker
um And my son ate a lot of fast food, right? There was a lot of fast food. There was a lot of other people's housing. There was there's just no other way to do it, right? And I remember I i literally broke down.
00:52:57
Speaker
Because the the judgment. Yeah. Yeah. Again. The label, I am a bad mom.
00:53:08
Speaker
Can you imagine? Can you imagine? You're doing everything you can. And this thing that takes way more time, effort, and attention than it should is not being handled the way they are suggesting.
00:53:22
Speaker
These kids are not dying from eating fast food all the time.
00:53:27
Speaker
Adults are dying from eating fast food. These kids are all right. Okay. My child has eaten a lot of ramen. Okay.
00:53:39
Speaker
I buy ramen on purpose. Okay. not an accident. There are some conversations. Do their whole colog college career on ramen. Okay. like Hello. It's old people dying from ramen. Not young people.
00:53:51
Speaker
That's a whole other conversation. Okay. and You won't hear it from me because, look, I bought a whole bunch of Velveeta mac and cheese. Okay.
Redefining Success and Personal Freedom
00:54:00
Speaker
love the microwave one. It's alive and then good.
00:54:06
Speaker
Rhonda, let me tell you, there was a chief that was on the stage. That's what she said to me. She was like, is he alive, honey? That's what I'm saying. Then let's go. let Let's keep moving. Let's keep a moving. They didn't eat it every day, but come on. It could happen a couple of times a week. Nobody's going to die.
00:54:21
Speaker
Nobody's going to die. We used to get in trouble for eating ramen. That was like a treat to us. We could find some little pennies, right? And go get some ramen. Walk the store by ourselves. That was amazing. That was so much fun. You know, these are crying because they got ramen couple times a week. I was like, ooh, ramen. I get some chicken ramen.
00:54:40
Speaker
Girl, what did it cost? 14 cents or something? 14 cents. That was the struggle for me. going to tell you what the struggle for me was. to the store. the The crazy thing. Here's my mind. The crazy thing was that my kid was OK, but I was still beating myself up.
00:54:56
Speaker
Right. And other people may not have even been judging you, but you just felt it anyway. The collective. The collective guilt. Pressure guilt. Right. And then, of course, I go online. hmm.
00:55:11
Speaker
And I'm in these groups, okay? because i'm Because I'm wanting to be the perfect mom. So I'm in these i'm in these groups. Y'all get out of them groups. going to tell y'all the truth. yeah I know community is important for y'all, but y'all got to get out of these groups because wo let us adopt some more who cares energy. Like for real, for real. i love it.
00:55:31
Speaker
Yes. I love it Drink some extra water. You'll be all right. if flush it, flush it, flush it, flush with water. It'll be all right.
00:55:43
Speaker
Cause if I have to fight with you to eat, just, just eat. And also if I have to fight with myself. So exhausting.
00:55:53
Speaker
So exhausting. Okay.
00:55:57
Speaker
This has been so juicy. So good. i know. know, yes i you know um Yeah, there was some really, really powerful things that came through. tears say Who cares? It's energy.
00:56:11
Speaker
It's everything. It really is. It really is. I'm not even going to say because. We don't have to explain, but yes. No. It is. because Oh, because here's another thing. Too much damn explaining.
00:56:25
Speaker
God. Too much damn explaining. Justifying. And they're not going to accept your explanation anyway. Anyway, anyway who say it again. You're not going to accept your explanation, your reasoning, your, your.
00:56:46
Speaker
You're on trial. You're on trial. I refuse to be on trial. I will write you a letter if I need to tell you something, but you're not going to pull me into the courtroom.
00:56:57
Speaker
Okay. So an explanation can I just say this? I'm so glad you just said that. umm so When you said I refuse to be on trial, like right before you said that, I literally saw, because sometimes clairvoyance comes through. clairvoyant, generally speaking. it I don't lead with that. Let say I don't lead with it. Right.
00:57:14
Speaker
Okay. Yeah, right. Okay. But I literally saw uhuh someone get up from the witness stand and walk off.
00:57:25
Speaker
I like it. i like it Okay. Cause somebody listening right now, you're listening live. You're listening a replay, whatever you're listening. Get up walk. Get up off the witness stand. Yes.
00:57:36
Speaker
and And walk off. You feel like you have to be there. you don't That's what we're talking about. Freedom. Control and freedom. Yeah. Get up and walk off.
00:57:47
Speaker
Yeah. I feel like the generation before us, our parents' generation was fighting others for freedom. Yes. We're fighting for our freedom, period.
00:57:58
Speaker
You know, i think shirley Shirley Chisholm said, if they don't give me a seat at the table, I'm going to bring a folding chair. i'm pretty fresh I'm pretty sure that was Shirley Chisholm.
00:58:09
Speaker
And she was right at the time. OK, but now we have the Internet. We have Zoom. Right. and Right. International. We can do things with anyone.
00:58:20
Speaker
We don't need to get to the table. We can have our own table.
Embracing Identity and Autonomy
00:58:25
Speaker
Come on. Because they would still like you to feel like there's no table like their table. Yeah.
00:58:31
Speaker
Well, that's the control. You got to try and sit here, but we won't let you. We won't let you. We still want you to try. is the point. That's right. That's the point. Yes. No, a lot of people are walking away.
00:58:44
Speaker
i don't want to start something the last minute, but I do have to applaud these young girls that are in their 20s and they're like, I'm not getting married. Yes. and I'm not having children and they're making a conscious decision while it's still a choice, I'm applaud them.
00:59:01
Speaker
And not because I'm against family or kids or any of that, because we need that to keep going. What they're saying is I see that there's a whole bunch of choices out here, whole bunch of men that are not open or that are going to raise my child and be with me like how I grew up. And I don't want to repeat that. So to prevent that from happening, maybe they're not energy workers. Maybe they don't know how to heal their ancestral wounds. They're just walking away from it.
00:59:34
Speaker
I can pay my bills. I can travel. I'm good. Like, I don't need to do this. don't have to put up with this. And I'm applauding them because that never crossed my mind. Now, when I was eight, I told my mom I wasn't having any kids. I did do that.
00:59:50
Speaker
But it was too strong. The society things were too strong. The community, the family, all that was too strong. And it didn't happen that way. yeah But if I was in this time, with my understanding, I had things will be different. I'll tell you that right now.
01:00:05
Speaker
I'm going to say the truth. i'm a state Listen, I'm touching the green. I just said that to myself the other day. yeah it it was different. I mean, I'm i'm more conscious now. I'm i'm not there. It was interesting when I was growing up. I was like a sheep. I was following along, but I was still like, this ain't right. I'm following because I need to eat. If my parents kick me out. Okay. So safety and survival. I'm going to die. can't make money yet. I don't know how to do this thing. yes But I don't, this isn't right. i don't i don't like how these people are interacting with each other. I don't like how they're treating me. I don't like how they're treating other people.
01:00:52
Speaker
But I'm only 15. So I got to get along with these people. right At least till I get a job. you know And I did want to leave like at 18. And people said, why are they such a rush?
01:01:05
Speaker
How were they raised? Were you raised in a supportive environment? You know, are are we out of time? Because I have one more thing i want to say, but if we're out of time, I will leave. so I will. I will. I'm going to say, no, say the thing because. Oh, okay. Let's spiritually say the thing.
01:01:23
Speaker
In feng shui. Mm-hmm. there are the different elements, right? And people have dominant elements. And what I realized really recently is that my element is in direct opposition to my parents' elements.
01:01:39
Speaker
My brother's element is kind of like, he's earth and he is more get along with everybody. Right, right. Kind of situation. Right. I'm wood.
01:01:51
Speaker
wood. My mother's fire. So imagine fire and wood. Yeah. And my dad is metal, metal and wood. OK, so a lot of things became clear. And I just want to say to people who feel like nonconformists, know who you are. Everybody listening to this feels like nonconformists.
01:02:09
Speaker
Let say that. i ahead And you probably are. I mean, there is more than one way to be. It's more than one way to be. But know who you are. Know who you really are. You can't be yourself. You don't know yourself. You have to know yourself.
01:02:23
Speaker
That's it right there. Know yourself. And and now I'm going to
01:02:31
Speaker
Give yourself the permission. Ah, taking my whole life. Yeah, my whole life. Give yourself permission. Back to the analogy. Go ahead and walk off that witness stand. Yeah, I love that. i love it. i love it. Yeah, I just decided, you know, you just decided. Yeah, decided.
01:02:53
Speaker
Let's decide. I don't have to fit your standard. I don't have to be on trial. Explain myself every time. Either you get it or you don't get it. And I just want to say I'm really analogies are like it's that thing. Right. But what happens is we were, you know, because of safety, survival coding, we come up on the witness stand and we feel like we have to stay. It's like the elephant. You know, that story with the elephant. They took the chain off, but you still feel like you have to be there. The environment makes you feel like.
01:03:21
Speaker
You can't get off that witness stand, right? like the the the The courtroom is dark. It's all, you know, it's dark walls. is yeah The way that it's set up, it's- been subpoenaed. You've been subpoenaed. You can't leave. It's a bailiff in the corner, okay? You're in consent. You get up. Okay. So the environment makes you feel like you can't, you you can't get up from under that gaze. Yeah.
01:03:47
Speaker
And I think yeah we get to we get to end and close and summarize and everything like just encouraging everybody.
01:03:56
Speaker
Give yourself that know who you are. Yeah. Know who you are. about it as long as you need to. Yes. Do all the things. Do all the things. Get your whatever, your human design, your astrology, your do all the things. Keep taking the antidepressants if you need to.
01:04:15
Speaker
Do it. Do it. Do what you got to do. Chemical imbalance is real. You know, mental. Hormone imbalance is real. Life stages is real. the whole other Other time.
01:04:28
Speaker
Yes, all of it. Part one, part two, in part three. no It's all real. no Right. your Your flesh is real. Right. The pain is real. If you have to just inch to go towards it, it's fine. If you have to say, I'm going to spend the night in jail if I do this.
01:04:49
Speaker
But if I don't get up, I'm going to die bitter and angry. You go spend the night in jail and just Do your best. Stay awake. but Don't fall asleep.
01:05:01
Speaker
Spend night in jail and then go home a free person. Go home free. yes Free. Don't stay in jail.
01:05:12
Speaker
If you don't know if you're in jail or not, that's the first problem. But if you know. Yeah, I feel like, you know, hold your spirit, your body, you know.
01:05:22
Speaker
Yeah. Yeah. Thank you. Thank you, Charbet, for such a juicy, juicy, juicy conversation. conversation and Thank you Everyone listening, saying she is tagged on this. You know where that she's on Facebook. She's on LinkedIn. She's on YouTube. You're tagged if you want to ask her. well let me not speak for you. If you want to, I'm saying for my people, if you want to connect with her, connect, you know what I mean? Connect, click the bell, follow her. um i'm so I'm so honored and I'm so grateful to have you in my in my field um as a friend and as a trusted ah colleague and energy worker. And I feel that and I return it to you. I feel it.
01:06:07
Speaker
That energy is important. Our people are spiritual. We always have been. You don't need permission. Come on. To be who you are.
01:06:18
Speaker
You don't need your permission. ah Can I just stop it? Charmaine. Okay. i Because I actually do need to piece that out a little bit because people don't understand permission. Permission, what she means is acceptance.
01:06:31
Speaker
o Who cares? Able. Right. Ask. right yeah their community, their, their, what you don't.
01:06:44
Speaker
No permission needed. No permission needed. No permission needed. Thank you everyone who was here. Thank you for your energy. Thank you for your comments. Thank you for sharing your story. Thank you for connecting. Thank you for elevating. Thank you for deciding in your spirit. Thank you for your yes. Thank you for all your awareness. Thank you for your movement. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you.
01:07:08
Speaker
I love it. I love it. I felt that more than any church service I had ever been. no benediction ever touched that. And I'm telling you right now.
01:07:19
Speaker
Yes, ma'am. I felt it. I felt it. Yeah. Big hugs everybody. Love and peace. Love and peace. Okay. We'll let you know when the next one's coming. We'll let you know.
01:07:34
Speaker
Bye everybody. Thank you all. Hey, goddess and those who support them listening in. Thank you so much for sharing this space with me.
01:07:45
Speaker
Here's a quick reminder that if you hit that subscribe button, you won't miss the next powerful episode. And if you share it, we get to elevate together. So share it with that sister you know needs this juiciness in their lives.
01:07:59
Speaker
And definitely check out the links in the show notes. You'll see links to the next events and tap into some free resources and even book a call with me because maybe your soul is calling for a little bit more.
01:08:12
Speaker
Because listen, you don't have to wait until you're ready to be your next level self. You're ready right now.