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72. Keeping Their Legacy Alive- With Romy Devack
74 Plays4 years ago
Romy Devack started SINCERELY after working in the fashion industry for over a decade, as an expert consultant across celebrity and retail. When her father, Stephen Devack, passed away after a sudden bout with cancer in September 2014, she planned to tattoo his signature on her body as a way to honor his memory and keep a part of him with her at all times. Her mother, however, quickly shot down that idea with a fervent, maternal, “NO! No way!” and suggested a symbolic piece of jewelry instead.
Romy struggled to find the perfect everyday piece to honor her father, combing the available options in the market before turning to the idea of designing her own. For her mother’s birthday in February 2015, she asked a family friend to turn her late father’s signature into a diamond necklace so that the one-of-a-kind piece of jewelry could be worn close to her heart. Romy’s mother was overcome by the gift; it was both meaningful and beautiful.
In the weeks that followed, her mother Joy was stopped constantly and asked about the unique piece. When she explained its origins, they loved the story behind it as much as the striking necklace itself. A flurry of interest followed as friends, family, and strangers began asking if they could order their own personalized piece, organically sparking a business pursuit.
In January 2016, Romy realized her dream of creating a jewelry line that fuses design and meaning. The personalized pieces are unique and beautiful, but the sentiment behind them – of keeping a loved one close to your heart and with you at all times – is equally as important to the intention of the company.
SINCERELY was born as a tribute to one man, and carries on as treasured light for thousands of others.
Contact Romy Devack to get your own custom piece or to listen to her Good Grief interviews on Instagram.
https://sincerelyjewelry.com/
https://www.instagram.com/sincerelyjewelry/
Contact Kendra Rinaldi to be a guest or for coaching:
http://www.griefgratitudeandthegrayinbetween.com
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Transcript
Introduction to Grief and Gratitude
00:00:00
Speaker
And I've been with my boyfriend a little over four years. But yeah, I like to think that maybe my dad sprinkled some like magic fairy dust and was like,
00:00:10
Speaker
Here you go, he always wanted me to just get married. That was like his number one priority. He was like, I don't care if you work, I just want you to get married. So, and he heard all the stories about all the guys that I dated and he had nicknames for all of them and he's like, oh God, these losers. So I know that he would be so happy that I'm finally with somebody who's so great and special and treats me very well.
Introducing Romi Devak and Her Journey
00:00:41
Speaker
Hello and welcome to Grief, Gratitude, and the Gray in Between podcast. This podcast is about exploring the grief that occurs at different times in our lives in which we have had major changes and transitions that literally shake us to the core and make us experience grief.
00:01:05
Speaker
I created this podcast for people to feel a little less hopeless and alone in their own grief process as they hear the stories of others who have had similar journeys. I'm Kendra Rinaldi, your host. Now let's dive right in to today's episode.
00:01:29
Speaker
Thank you so much for tuning in today. I am having the honor of chatting for the first time with Romi Devak. And we've just chatted for the past 20 minutes here pre-interview. Pre-interview, excited to kind of get to know each other. So, Romi is the creator and designer and probably CEO and everything else.
00:01:51
Speaker
All the different titles. All of the things, exactly. All of it of Sincerely Jewelry. And also then now on her Instagram account, she now hosts this weekly podcast called Good Grief in which she interviews
Pet Love and Family Background
00:02:06
Speaker
people. And Jenny Robinson, which was one of my guests, had been one of your guests on Instagram live. Exactly. So welcome, Romy. Thank you so much for having me.
00:02:17
Speaker
I'm glad you're here. And we just discovered we're both golden doodle mamas. We are both golden doodle mamas, the best kind of mama in my opinion. I have human mamas too. But let me just tell you, I have human children too. But let me just say that my doodle loves me probably more unconditionally than my children because they're teenagers. So it's like, I definitely get more love from the doodle.
00:02:47
Speaker
Yeah, I don't have children yet. So he's my number one, but this poor animal, like when I do have kids, he's not going to know what to do with himself because he is so spoiled and we treat him like a human and he goes everywhere with us. So it's pretty hilarious.
00:03:04
Speaker
So it's like I'm the queen of side notes of like these derailed conversations. And okay, good. So and Mike, and as I told you right before we started recording, the conversation is just really casual. We're just going to get to hear your journey and hear more about you, your dad, and then your journey of grief as well as sincerely jewelry as well. So
00:03:30
Speaker
We talked about Florida, we talked about LA. So you're originally from Florida? Yes. Okay. So let's go into a little bit of your background and upbringing. Okay. So yeah, I'm from South Florida. I grew up originally in a town called Plantation, which is part of Fort Lauderdale. And then when I was about 13, we moved to a town called Weston, which is just kind of West Fort Lauderdale. And it was a great place to grow up. I have an older brother that's about eight years older than me.
00:04:00
Speaker
My parents are originally from the Northeast, so I still had some of that Northeast blood in me. Where in the Northeast are they from?
00:04:10
Speaker
My dad's from Long Island. Well, originally the Bronx and then moved to Long Island and my mom's from New Jersey. So they moved down here right after my dad graduated from dental school. He was a dentist, moved down to Florida. He always wanted to be in the sun. And yeah, they raised my brother and I here and plan to obviously stay here. And my mom is still here, but unfortunately my dad passed away.
Romi's Childhood and Family Loss
00:04:36
Speaker
There is that. But it was such a great place to grow up. I don't know from the winters, although we did ski my entire life. So we spent a lot of time in Colorado and ended up having a second home there. That was really my parents' happy place. And because I live in Los Angeles, it was a lot of times much easier for me to travel there than to come all the way back to Florida. So that was like a second home for me for many years of my life.
00:05:05
Speaker
So yeah, it was great. I mean, I horseback rode for about 10 years of my life. That was a big part. You know, we were big into boating, going to the beach club. It was just like a great sun-filled life where I had a great family. My grandparents lived down here. Eventually, some of my cousins lived down here.
00:05:30
Speaker
Great friends. I went to the same school from kindergarten to senior year. So I had the same group of friends my entire childhood and then of course more friends from other schools as like we got older and the bar and bot mitzvah circuit started and all of that. And I keep in touch with many of them. In fact, I'm seeing one of them on Thursday night. And yeah, it was just, it was a great, great place to grow up. Great childhood. Very, very lucky.
00:05:59
Speaker
Here I am now for the last four months in South Florida, which is the longest amount of time I've spent here since I don't even know how long ago probably since my dad passed away, but I was only here two months when that happened. So I've beaten it up by another two months.
00:06:14
Speaker
So what took you then from there to Los Angeles then? Did you move for work? Did you move for love? Did you move for school? Or just because, hmm, I want to... Just because a little bit. Exactly. So in high school, over the summer, there was a program called Summer Discovery, which a lot of kids from the East Coast did. And you could go to a school for the summer and take classes and live in the dorms.
00:06:43
Speaker
kind of experience what college had to offer. So I did this program at UCLA. So I lived in the dorms, lived in Westwood, got to experience a little bit of LA life. And then when I went to college, I actually ended up graduating this graduating a semester early.
00:07:02
Speaker
and had six months to sort of figure out what I wanted to do and where I wanted to be. I had originally taken the LSAT just because I don't know. I didn't know what I was going to do with my life, so that sounded like a great idea. And then I really realized that I did not want to go to law school. That wasn't for me. I had always wanted to be in fashion, so I started interviewing in New York.
00:07:25
Speaker
and in Los Angeles to kind of get a feel for what I would want to do. And I went to New York a few times, stayed with friends, had a few interviews, and then went to LA for a week and stayed with a family friend and
00:07:42
Speaker
loved it. I rented a car. I drove around. I had interviews. I went to the beach and there was just something about it that I don't know if it was familiar because of the warm weather and the beaches and the palm trees and all of that, but it just felt like something I needed to try. And I always figured if it didn't work out, I could always go back to the East Coast and then try New York. But here I am in August, it will be 14 years that I've lived in Los Angeles. And I guess it worked. I guess I loved it.
The Birth of Sincerely Jewelry
00:08:13
Speaker
Yeah. That's awesome. That's so awesome. And there's a beauty too and I like because you get the beach, but you also get mountains which you don't have in Florida. Yeah. You don't have that particular aspect. You're just flat.
00:08:29
Speaker
So and I say it with love because my family lives in Florida. So I'm like, I say it lovingly. But yeah, but that's the one thing that sometimes like we miss here in Dallas. We don't have either. We'll have the mountains and we don't have water. OK, so that's how you ended up there. And that's how you then you decided to go into the fashion industry. And then how did you decide to become a jeweler?
00:08:58
Speaker
Well, that was sort of- Is this after, by accident? This is after you with your dad? This was after my dad. So this was sort of by accident. I never intended to be a jewelry designer or even make jewelry for that matter. I was a stylist for about nine years and dealt with a lot of jewelry because we had to pull jewelry for award shows and press junkets and advertising campaigns and all of that. So I was very familiar with
00:09:26
Speaker
Lot of the big jewelry designers and you know dealing with the jewelry and all that kind of stuff But I never actually manufactured it and understood that side of it so after my dad passed away, which was the end of September in 2014 and
00:09:43
Speaker
It was my mom's birthday in February of the following year, so not too far away. And it's like, what do you get somebody for their first birthday without, you know, there's really nothing you can do that's going to make that first birthday.
00:09:58
Speaker
Okay. Yeah. You know, whatever word you want to use to describe the feelings that that person is going to have. So I wanted to get her something special and anyone who knows, I really enjoy gift giving and I love getting thoughtful gifts. So it was sort of a no brainer. So one of my dad's very good friends at the time was a jeweler, is still a jeweler in South Florida.
00:10:22
Speaker
And when we were cleaning out my dad's office, we found a stamp that he used to, you know, fill prescriptions, sign checks, all of that. And I stamped it and it was his signature. And I was like, I wonder if I can turn dad's signature into a diamond necklace. That sounds like a great idea. So I sent it to my dad's friend and I said, Hey, can you turn my dad's first name, which was Steven?
00:10:48
Speaker
into a diamond necklace and he was like, yeah, I can't see why not. So he made it for my mom's birthday. That was like the first rendition of it. Obviously we've perfected the process since and I gave it to her for her birthday and she was beside herself and to this day now she has a new one of the new and upgraded version.
00:11:08
Speaker
She constantly just touches it, and it makes her feel like my dad is with her. So long story short on that, people kept asking her about it. It's very unique, because my dad had a unique handwriting, so nobody really knows what it says. And then one person said, oh my goodness, that's amazing. I want one. I want one. I want one. So we made a handful of them just for people that we knew, friends and family in South Florida.
00:11:36
Speaker
That was sort of it. I mean, I kind of at that time decided, should I turn this into a business? Why not? I can.
Grieving Her Father's Illness and Passing
00:11:45
Speaker
I know I can make them. But I still very much had a full-time job at the time. And it was overwhelming with having just lost my dad and dealing with my mom and her anxiety about being alone and all of that. So it wasn't something that really turned into a real business until about two years later.
00:12:04
Speaker
And now it's been four and a half years of it being a real, real business. And then as of February 1st, I actually took time away from my full time job, which I've had this entire time to just focus solely on sincerely. So now it is officially full, full, full time.
00:12:25
Speaker
Bravo. Congratulations. Thank you. Love it. Now, I want to ask you a few questions then in the midst of this journey then. So when your dad passed and he passed away from a cancer, correct? A type of cancer? Yes.
00:12:43
Speaker
Yeah, he passed away from something called multiple myeloma, which is a bone marrow cancer. And he also passed away from a secondary disease that comes with a small percentage of people with myeloma called amyloidosis. OK. How long was his process from diagnosis to passing away?
00:13:09
Speaker
three months. So it was really quick. Yeah, it was by the time we even knew what was going on.
00:13:20
Speaker
It was very quick. Yeah, it was pretty crazy. And you were in Los Angeles when you found out. So would you mind sharing just the ask that a little bit about that, the finding out and then what do you do? Because that's the thing you get a diagnosis.
00:13:40
Speaker
you probably still think you have some time. And then it's just three months. So how again, here you're from coast to coast, share a little bit about that aspect. So I think as many people you've probably spoken to as well as myself, have shared parents like to hide things from you until they need to tell you so
00:14:04
Speaker
I didn't realize that there were a few things that were going on behind the scenes and some tests that my dad was having done, but nobody told me until of course they got the results. And I remember I was at, I don't know if you're familiar, but there was an outdoor mall in Los Angeles called The Grove.
00:14:21
Speaker
And I remember I was in the parking lot and my brother called me and this was in the middle of the day and I was there for work because when I was styling, I had to like go to stores and do returns and shop and all of that. So it was the middle of a work day and my brother's calling me, which was already strange.
00:14:40
Speaker
And I answered the phone and he was like, you know, I have to talk to you about something. Also not a good sign. He's like, don't worry. Everything's going to be fine. Um, but dad's been having some tests done and they came back and it turns out he was diagnosed with a form of cancer called multiple myeloma.
00:15:01
Speaker
It was like everything after the word cancer just vanished. And I immediately went into panic mode and started crying. And my brother was like, Romy, it's fine. Honest to God, he's going to be okay. This is so treatable. It's so early stages. It's stage one. He has no lesions on his bones yet, which is part of myeloma. It starts to affect your bones. He's completely clear. They caught it very early.
00:15:31
Speaker
He doesn't even need treatment. They're just going to watch him and see how things progress, but he will be fine. So that hearing that really, you know, eased me. It didn't, it wasn't like he's diagnosed with a terminal cancer. He has this amount of time to live. That would have been even more devastating, but this I was like, okay.
00:15:51
Speaker
My brother says he's fine. This is super treatable. Tom Brokaw has it and he's lived with it for years and years and years. Like dad's going to be fine. Yeah, exactly. Most people are like, Oh, I didn't even know he had that. But, um, yeah, I didn't know.
00:16:09
Speaker
So the thing with my dad was, like I mentioned, he had this secondary disease, which we didn't know, and it's called amyloidosis, and it's a disease that happens on its own, but it also is something that can be caused by myeloma, and it's about 10 to 15... Like triggered by... Exactly. It's kind of like triggered by... Yeah, it's just one of those fun things that you can get. 10 to 15% of people with myeloma also get this, and that is ultimately
00:16:38
Speaker
what caused all of his problems. And it was very much a double-edged sword because in order for them to treat the amyloidosis and the myeloma, he had to have chemo. But the amyloidosis was making him so sick that he couldn't tolerate the chemo. So until they got the amyloidosis under control, they couldn't treat him for everything else. So it just became the cycle where
00:17:07
Speaker
It got so out of control and he got so sick, there was really never the opportunity to treat him correctly for the myeloma. But, you know, back up a little bit, he was really totally fine. They went to MD Anderson up in Boston and met with one of the top myeloma specialists who I quote, I will never forget this, told my dad, like something will get you long before this ever does.
00:17:33
Speaker
And he came home, celebrated, was doing great, was feeling fine. And basically over the next month or so, things just sort of started to really progress. And in hindsight now, my guess is that he probably had this brewing in his system for a long time, but nobody knew because he had some signs of some strange things like amyloidosis causes your skin to almost like harden and become leathery.
00:18:03
Speaker
And he had these symptoms of his skin changing over the last year and nothing again, he went to the dermatologist. They took, nothing came back because it's so rare. It's really hard for people to pinpoint and a lot of doctors don't even know what amyloidosis is. So yeah, it started to progress. He developed a heart murmur. So once the heart murmur,
00:18:27
Speaker
They were like, okay, it's time to start treating. And everything again was going pretty well with treatment, but the amyloidosis just started to literally attack all of his organs. It's basically like a sticky protein that latches on to all of your organs, kidneys, heart, GI tract, and it just, it destroys it. And it literally was just destroying his insides.
00:18:55
Speaker
And it took really no time, as you know, the diagnosis. And I came home in September for Labor Day. I was with actually my best friend in Chicago the weekend before. Again, nobody was telling me what was going on. And then my mom called to say,
00:19:13
Speaker
You know, your dad's really sick. He's in the hospital. We're trying to figure out what's going on. And I just, I don't know if I had like a gut feeling, but I basically said to her, I was at Madewell in Chicago. I remember this also. And I was standing outside crying and I said, I'm coming home anyway, but I'm not going back to Los Angeles until dad's out of the hospital. And I went home.
00:19:36
Speaker
because we had a family friend who was getting married Labor Day weekend. And I never went back until after my dad passed away. He was in the hospital. And when did he pass away? He passed away September 29. So just shy of a month of when I got back to Florida. And he was in the hospital the entire time, except for two days he came home and then had to go right back.
00:20:03
Speaker
Wow. And it was crazy, you know, he was down at Sylvester at University of Miami. And we were at the time we're living in, my parents had moved up to Boca, which is pretty far, it's over an hour. So we were staying with our family friends in Weston, which is halfway so that every morning we could wake up and drive down to the hospital and spend the day there. It was, it was crazy. You and your brother lives in that area as well.
00:20:31
Speaker
Yes, and my brother lives in Florida as well and he's also a dentist and he kind of got thrown into my dad's office and trying to figure out what was going on there and to salvage it because my dad, while he wasn't feeling well and what we learned after the fact is that he kind of had slowed down in the office and wasn't seeing as many patients and was just not himself for several months before.
00:20:58
Speaker
my brother had to kind of go back in and figure out the business and get things settled there. So he was working while my mom and I were constantly at the hospital. You know, you have to advocate for somebody who's in the hospital, even though he was in ICU and getting unbelievable care. There's just still a lot that needs to be taken care of to make sure that
00:21:20
Speaker
The person is getting everything that they need, is being treated properly, all of the things. Yeah, it's a lot. It is a lot. And the thing is that you feel also so helpless, right? That it's like as a family member, that's kind of like all you feel like you can do is at least be there to be an advocate for their care, even if you can't necessarily
00:21:47
Speaker
cure them per se, you can at least make sure that the quality of their life as they are there is a good experience. So that is a lot. And then also with your brother, I'm thinking of how much, you know, I always talk about the fact that sometimes when
00:22:06
Speaker
people pass away, the one thing that sometimes does not even allow us to fully grieve is all the business around death that we don't even realize that there is, and business meaning belongings, in this case, his actual business, you know, the, you know, burial
00:22:29
Speaker
you know, preparations and this, that you really don't fully start your grief journey sometimes until a few weeks, till sometimes even months later when you're done with the busyness of it. Not that those things are not also part of it, but sometimes for some people it just consumes them, that it doesn't really allow them to feel fully what's going on.
00:22:55
Speaker
So how was how was how was it then when he passed away as a family? What did you all do and how did you honor his his life?
00:23:13
Speaker
Yeah, to your point, what you were just saying, after he passed away, I mean, bless my dad's heart, he was not prepared. He didn't, first of all, no one could have imagined this was going to happen, especially in such a short amount of time. And we never spoke about if
00:23:32
Speaker
he did pass away. We never had that conversation with him. I don't think any of us could admit it. And truthfully, I don't know if I could have sat down and had a conversation where I said goodbye to him.
Coping Mechanisms and Grief Processing
00:23:43
Speaker
So while it's a little
00:23:46
Speaker
difficult because there was no closure. It's also sort of a relief that I didn't have to say goodbye to my dad, with him being conscious and aware of it. But I think the last will that he made was probably when he had to pick a guardian for my brother and I when we were younger. But he did not plan anything. He did not have a cemetery plot. He did nothing, which is great.
00:24:15
Speaker
Yes, I went to live with my heart, which is my which when I was little was my aunt and uncle He just had I do he just had nothing planned and not in a bad way, but he was such a he was such a
00:24:30
Speaker
big personality. His zest for life was enormous. So of all people you would have ever expected to have passed away young from cancer, he would have been the very last person. Like the shock heard around South Florida when my dad passed away was you can't imagine the amount of people that showed up to his funeral was unbelievable because I think it really made people
00:24:53
Speaker
look at their own mortality because again, he was so full of life. He rode motorcycles. He rode boats. He still skied. He did whatever he wanted. He was the ultimate consumer. He had every toy before it was even on the market.
00:25:09
Speaker
So, it was a lot, but that being said, when he passed away, there was a sense of relief because when somebody's that sick and they're in the hospital, you constantly have that pit in your stomach of, am I going to get a call in the middle of the night? Am I going to get a call in the morning? Every night before my mom and I went to bed, I called the hospital to check to make sure he was okay. Every morning at 7 a.m., I called the hospital to make sure he was okay, and then we would get dressed and go.
00:25:39
Speaker
to be able to have woken up while we were devastated and heartbroken, and this was going to be a whole new type of pain to deal with. That release of the pit in the stomach of, okay, I'm not worried about this person suffering anymore, was probably the biggest sense of relief you could feel.
00:25:59
Speaker
Now, because my dad wasn't prepared and told my mom jokingly once if anything ever happens to me call so and so that was it we called so and so and we sort of like started to piece together all of these things and for a month
00:26:17
Speaker
I stayed in Florida, I woke up, I couldn't sleep so I woke up at the crack of dawn anyway and I would leave my mom in the room. We were sharing the guest room because neither of us wanted to go into their bedroom. So my mom and I slept together in what was my bedroom in the front of the house and I would go into the kitchen with all of the bills and all of the paperwork and everything and every morning from 6 a.m. to 10, I just worked.
00:26:45
Speaker
I would send all the relative paperwork where it needed to go. I was flipping all of my dad's accounts into my mom's name. I was creating passwords for her and making lists and everything because she never did that. You know, my dad either did it or he had a bookkeeper through his office who handled kind of everything for him because he was so all over the place that he had somebody who he needed somebody to
00:27:14
Speaker
come in and sort of manage like all of his day to day things that he didn't have the time, patience or energy for. So there was a lot of that. And I think, you know, to your point, it kept me really busy and occupied. And I didn't really have time to sit down and think about what had just happened. We had so in the Jewish religion, we have something that's called Shiva. And so we sat Shiva at our house.
00:27:43
Speaker
think for a week and we just had people there constantly and I don't even until we went to sleep at night there was always at least one or two people there and then the next day we woke up and there were more people there and there was constantly food being delivered and
00:28:01
Speaker
It was a lot. After that month and after taking care of my mom and getting her, I would say as set up as she needed to be, everything she needed to worry about was pretty much handled and taken care of. She said, okay, I'm okay. You need to go back to LA. You need to go back to your life. I was like, I'm not going back to LA. She's like, Romy, I'm going to be okay. I have your brother here. You have to go back to LA.
00:28:32
Speaker
I packed my things, I went back to LA, and fortunately I have a great support system. I have great friends who were there. They all kept me really busy and I went back to work and I tried to do all the things that you do, like when you live your life as normal as possible.
00:28:59
Speaker
You know, I just remember calling my mom like once a day, hysterically crying, just saying like, I miss dad, I miss dad, I can't believe this happened. I miss dad. And that went on for a while. And, you know, it's been six and a half years now. And it's so hard for me to even remember like what that time was like. And I'm sure if I went to like some sort of
00:29:19
Speaker
specialty psychiatrist who pulls out your memories. I could go there but I don't know even how to go there because it was just such a horrible, horrible time. But it was definitely hard and I just remember just keeping myself busy and this sounds ridiculous but I had lost so much weight when my dad was sick. I could not eat for months, two months. I don't think I ate and I probably lost 10, 15 pounds
00:29:50
Speaker
I was already not heavy to begin with, so now I was like emaciated.
00:29:55
Speaker
And I remember going back to LA and people being like, Oh my God, you're so thin. And I'm like, Oh my God, my dad just died. Like, give me a break. Um, but for a long time, I started to think there was something wrong with me because I could not put the weight back on no matter what I did. No. Yeah. Like hypochondria, a little bit like you become a little bit of like sensitive, like, Oh, what is there? There are unknown things within me. Yeah. And it's like, if that can happen to someone.
00:30:25
Speaker
that was so healthy and so full of life you start to worry and so i went to my doctor i'm like i can't gain weight she's like oh that should be your biggest problem i'm like no you don't understand but um yeah with time i just created a new routine i think that i i think the fact that i was able to see that my mom really was okay
00:30:45
Speaker
without me being there also gave me a sense of relief because that was my biggest fear when my dad was, you know, getting really closely at the end is that I knew I would be okay because I'm young and I still have a life to live.
00:30:59
Speaker
And I could hopefully see the positives and be grateful for the fact that I did have such an amazing dad and such a great close relationship with him and was able to be there for him in the end. So I had no regrets, but I was just so worried about my mom because they had been together for 41 years and for her to now be living by herself.
00:31:21
Speaker
She had a heart attack in her 50s and had triple bypass surgery. And so she has a lot of angst about that. And I know like being alone and not feeling well for her. I just worried about all these different things, but she was doing well. So I guess in turn was doing well. My brother was doing well.
00:31:41
Speaker
We had the support. I was seeing my mom often. I was going back to Florida every six to eight weeks. Slowly, over time, we all created this new routine for ourselves, this new normal. That's a good way, the new routine. I like that word, rather.
00:31:59
Speaker
Because even now, when we're talking during the pandemic, people are like, oh, I can't wait for us to go back to normal. We're like, what is really normal? Normal. What is normal? Really, in the big scheme of things, what is normal? Normal is what you're used to, but was normal?
00:32:21
Speaker
you know like okay like i don't know how to explain it like in this particular dynamic but in the terms of grief yes a new routine just a new way of living life and that doesn't dismiss the fact that of course you think about your dad all the time and that there's certain you know days in which you're probably
00:32:41
Speaker
not wanting to get out of bed or things like that either, right? So let's talk about that part of your tools. So your family was one of your supports. Keeping busy was one at the beginning because you were helping kind of with that. That was one of the ways you coped. What other tools did you use in your grief journey?
00:33:03
Speaker
aside also from observing your, you know, your religious rituals to following Shiva and so forth. What other things did you do? The most helpful thing for me, truthfully, was going on hikes by myself and listening to sad music.
00:33:22
Speaker
As depressing as that sounds, there was something, and I think part of it was the last real trip and good time I had with my dad was we were in Colorado. It was in July, so not too long before he passed away. Him and I, he drove me into town one day. I was going to go on a hike and he was going to have lunch with a friend.
00:33:46
Speaker
I went on this really long hike and I, it was so beautiful. And then I came back down and I saw my dad and he was having an ice cream, which at the time we were like, he's eating. And then him and I drove home. He had a Jeep Wrangler out there and we had the top down and we just had this, we drove like the back way through the most beautiful part of what I love in Colorado. And we just had such a nice day together. So I don't know if like hiking really like
00:34:13
Speaker
made me remember that day or it was just the being out in nature and having nobody around me and being able to like
00:34:22
Speaker
breathe this fresh air, listen to sad music, and cry, and nobody was there to judge me, see me, or bother me. So I hiked all the time, and it was just this release. Getting up the mountain was harder, so I would focus on the way up. I'd listen to my music, I'd get up the mountain, and then on the way down,
00:34:47
Speaker
where you're just like relaxing and pacing yourself because it's much easier to get down than it is to get up, I would just like sob the whole way down.
Love, Signs, and Spiritual Connections
00:34:58
Speaker
And it just felt good. It's so perfect. Yeah, and I don't think a lot of people know that. Oh, that you did that? Yeah, I don't think I've like.
00:35:09
Speaker
Yeah, I don't like I mean, I have a few friends that now they do I have a few friends who like would hike with me, but I went a lot by myself because I needed that time to just like clear my mind and cry. And it just felt like a safe place.
00:35:24
Speaker
That's so important to know that you can allow yourself. And what you said about listening to sad music, I do the same thing. Like if I really feel like crying one day, I actually do more things to make me cry. Like it's kind of like, let me go look for like some pictures or, you know, things like that. Like it's like, let me just
00:35:46
Speaker
use this time to really just sink into these emotions and find more things to bring those out because it's kind of like you feel like you can't breathe and you just kind of want to just like release. Exactly. Does that make sense? Yeah. Exactly. It's one of the release. That's beautiful. Now your dog, did you have him prior to your dad passing or did you get him afterwards?
00:36:12
Speaker
I didn't. My dad would have loved my dog. We had a lot of dogs growing up. We were a big dog family, so he didn't get to meet Jackson, and also I didn't have my boyfriend when my dad passed away. We met, I think, just a tiny bit over two years after my dad passed away, my boyfriend and I, and then we got our dog a year later.
00:36:39
Speaker
Yeah, he's a he's a he's newer to that. Well, he's a he's three, we've had him for three and a half years. So and I've been with my boyfriend a little over four years. But yeah, I like to think that maybe my dad sprinkled some like magic fairy dust and was like, here you go. He always wanted me to just get married. That was like his number one priority. He was like, I don't care if you work.
00:37:03
Speaker
I just want you to get married." And he heard all the stories about all the guys that I dated and he had nicknames for all of them and he's like, oh God, these losers. So I know that he would be so happy that I'm finally with somebody who's so great and special and treats me very well.
00:37:23
Speaker
you know, gets from Florida to he's from Florida as well. He's from New Jersey, coincidentally, he's from New Jersey, but his parents live in Florida. Okay, so yeah, so it's like, what are and you met in LA, we met in LA through mutual friends from Florida. Like, yeah, what are the chances like, you know, and then you can just go back home, visit his family, visit your mom, like, it's funny enough, his parents live in a community where a lot of my parents friends live.
00:37:54
Speaker
And they actually all, when my dad was still alive, long before Jordan and I started dating, were all at a wedding together. So his parents actually met my dad when he was still alive. That is just so perfect. It's crazy, small world, yeah. Yeah.
00:38:10
Speaker
It just, yeah, sometimes like you realize lives have to intertwine at one point or another. It's kind of like you crossed it, but maybe the timing wasn't right and then they cross again at the right time. And then, you know, sometimes you miss a few of those interactions. When I run into people, even just like randomly, I'm like, maybe there's a reason I'm running to this person again, you know, like,
00:38:35
Speaker
Maybe I need to meet them or I need to connect with them because why am I seeing them again? You know, I know or things like and you would always I feel like you sometimes haven't seen someone yours and then you're talking about them randomly and like the next day either they call you run into them or like something pops up about them. So yes, I definitely believe in that kind of stuff and
00:38:59
Speaker
and those energies. Okay. So let's talk about that then. So how do you, since you do believe in those things, how do you now maintain that connection with your dad, aside from your jewelry, which we're going to touch a little bit even more upon. When you go walking, that's what you were hiking at the beginning. That was your therapy. What other ways do you still keep that relationship now with him? You know,
00:39:27
Speaker
It's so interesting. I have never been one to like talk to my dad. Like I just feel so awkward. Even when I go to the cemetery, I'll sort of just like sit there, but I can't just like have a conversation. So I think it's just the fact that I'm constantly talking about him to other people or like I'll always
00:39:50
Speaker
Integrate him into a conversation because he was so part much part of my life and is so much part of who I am that I think the way that I stay connected to him is just by consistently keeping him alive by the way that I live my life the way that I honor him and the way that I talk about him with other people and My mom and I do get signs She
00:40:18
Speaker
Oh. My mom just called me. She just called me. Her ears must be ringing.
00:40:27
Speaker
I know her ears must be ringing. Can you tell me the timing? Like you literally just said my mom and I get signs and then here she is calling you. Yeah, here she is. Isn't that funny? So her she started getting them first and then I started getting them and my brother doesn't get them but we find dimes and I know other people find dimes but hers started when
00:40:56
Speaker
We had a home in colorado and she went to basically clean out the house because she was selling it was hard for all of us to go there after and.
00:41:08
Speaker
She put on a pair of shoes one day that she had worn the day before and she felt something in it and she looked and there was a dime. And when she walked into the room for the first time on my dad's side of the bed just laying there was a dime. And she woke up from a nap one day and stuck to her arm was a dime. So she started collecting them. And then the bag of dimes, which was pretty full, disappeared.
00:41:31
Speaker
And to this day, she's still like, it'll always be in like a very purposeful place, like not like, oh, a bag of change fell out, there's a dime. It'll be like, she did laundry recently. And when she opened up the washing machine to put everything in the dryer, there was a dime just sitting like right there.
00:41:50
Speaker
And to find coins now in things is even harder than what it would have been a few years back because we use so much credit cards, you know, that there's not like we walk around with change in general anyway. So, and that it's specifically a dime. Did a dime, was that any meaning for him prior to him dying that when you guys started to see the dimes, you could realize that there was a connection? No.
00:42:18
Speaker
No, it was just, they just started appearing everywhere and it was never, ever, ever any other type of change. Never a quarter, a nickel, a penny. It was always a dime. And like the most recent one that happened for me, because again, when I started finding them, it would be like very strange.
00:42:35
Speaker
like it would be on my rug in my living room in a part of the room that like I never walked to or like I was breaking down like a corrugated cardboard box at work one day and I got to the bottom of it and there was a dime in it like that's weird and then recently in Florida right around
00:42:56
Speaker
My mom's birthday, actually. My boyfriend and I were taking a walk in the neighborhood and my dog eats everything. I don't know if your dog eats everything, but he eats everything. So he stopped and was like sniffing in the grass and we're like, oh God, what is he gonna eat? So I walk over to see what he's sniffing and I was like, oh, don't even tell me, because it was shiny. And I bent down and it was a dime.
00:43:21
Speaker
And I'm like, oh, this is just getting crazy. So now I joke like, dad, I'm like, if you're going to give me change, like, can we increase to a quarter? Because I have a lot of dimes. I have a whole dish that I keep of them. There is at least 50 in there. And I keep them, I have dimes in every bag that I carry, every jacket that I wear, I keep them in the pockets. So it's wild. I've made my mom a necklace.
00:43:46
Speaker
where I took a dime and I had a dime and bezel put around it. And then most recently because she's building a new house, I put dimes into the foundation and yeah, in her bedroom. So he's everywhere. You can't escape him. Have you by chance Googled if there's any significance of dimes?
00:44:10
Speaker
There is. There is a significance here. What did you find? I am very curious because here my brain is like, OK, time. What's the OK, 10? OK, that's I wonder the number itself, the fact that it's, you know, like or what it is, you know, if it's the value of it, the 10, if the number 10 is significant or the, you know, I'm like here, like in my head, I'm just going around.
Dreams, Support Systems, and Transformation
00:44:35
Speaker
Yeah, it's OK. Let's say.
00:44:39
Speaker
What does Google Google? Google said, what does it mean when you find a dime? In this post, we explore the significance of dimes and the afterlife along with the spiritual meaning of finding dimes. OK, what does it say? What is the material dime or dime silver? What are dimes made of? I'm like a silver. I'm like, I don't say that really. What material are they nickel?
00:45:07
Speaker
i'm trying to find another time.
00:45:11
Speaker
Okay, well, you're not telling me the significance. So let's go on to, that's so funny that they, you Google that and yet you click on it and it doesn't. Okay. This is like the easiest. Okay. Here we go. Someone or something is trying to get your attention guidance or validation that you're on the right path, ancestors, spirits, or deceased loved ones want you to know they're looking out for you. And the number 10 symbolizes a circle. So a dime might indicate coming full circle.
00:45:39
Speaker
That's what I was thinking of the 10 of the 10. So I like those kind of things for me, like it's kind of like a little tap on the shoulder. That's how I see it. For me, it's numbers, you know, or things where if I see a feather on the ground or if I see, you know, I feel like it's that it's like this little tap on the shoulder of the.
00:46:00
Speaker
of the maybe in that converse in that moment either you were having a thought or a conversation was happening or something that is that reassurance of yeah, I'm here or maybe the Confirmation of whatever it is that you know what I mean? It's always like it's always when you need it like I think a lot of times we get them when we're talking about him a lot or you know
00:46:25
Speaker
when a birthday is coming up or an anniversary they are they're very specific they don't just like appear it's always like for a reason so that helps a lot as well and my brother does not find them like I said but funny enough my mom and my brother came out to LA
00:46:44
Speaker
Oh God, maybe it was two years ago now, pre-pandemic. And my brother hadn't been out to LA since he moved me there, which was like 13 years before. And we went to Neiman Marcus.
00:47:01
Speaker
And because it was like, your stores by this, like, I'm like, wait, so this is like the Grove made well. And I know every now we're at Neiman Marcus. You are in the fashion industry. It makes sense. My mom was like wanting to look at this bag and my brother were standing there chatting with the sales associate. My mom's trying the bag on and my brother turns around and he goes,
00:47:25
Speaker
Oh my God, I don't find dimes, but I just found the ultimate dime. It was a Judith Lieber bag that was shaped and fully encrusted in crystals that was a dime.
00:47:40
Speaker
It was like a life-size dime. It was huge. It was the size of probably a salad plate. This is what I think. It's kind of like your dad's. There have been dimes along your brother's path, but he's probably like, listen, what's your brother's name? Justin.
00:47:59
Speaker
Justin, you have not seen all these dimes I'm leaving around. Send you the one you cannot not miss. And it was so funny because like my dad loves to shop like love took me prom dress shopping when my mom was out of town brought his camera was taking pictures had the women taking them off the mannequins. So if you are going to find a life size dinner plate size dime,
00:48:25
Speaker
It should be at Neiman Marcus in the form of a Judith Lever handbag. That is not that surprising. I have to be honest. That is just, my cheeks hurt just here, like just smiling. I know. Isn't that hilarious? I love it. I love it. And that's the thing. It's like all these different connections are really what we make of them and how we feel. And sometimes still people, like I'm like, I have certain things that I,
00:48:51
Speaker
feel connected. It doesn't matter what others may think of those. It's what I make of these interpretations of these connections. And if they have meaning for me, and if they bring me closer to my loved ones that have passed away, then that's all that matters. That's all that matters. Right? It just brings you that connection. Exactly. It's like whatever works for you. It doesn't have to work for everyone else, but whatever makes you feel good or connected, then you just go with it.
00:49:20
Speaker
go for it yeah now do you dream do you remember your dreams by chance too i just talked to someone about this the other day so in the beginning and for a long time i would only dream about him being very sick and in the hospital so those were not pleasant dreams and then i've had one very memorable dream where he called me and it was very clearly him calling me from
00:49:47
Speaker
Like, I knew when the phone rang that it wasn't... Well, first of all, the phone rang and it was like a weird number. It wasn't like a traditional telephone number. It was like 6FG759L, something weird. Oh, you remember? Let's write that down. Let's interpret that one. So I answer the phone and it was him. And I remember being so unbelievably excited. I'm like, oh my God, my dad is calling me.
00:50:14
Speaker
It's sort of perfect because him and I talked on the phone all the time because we lived far away from each other, but we talked on the phone all the time and all of his friends used to always say, it didn't matter if they were in the middle of a dinner or in the middle of a meeting or whatever. If I called him and he saw my name pop up, he's like, oh, Romy's calling me. I have to take this. So the fact that it was a phone call felt very appropriate. So I answered the phone.
00:50:43
Speaker
It's him and I'm like, oh my God, I miss you. And we had this just like, I don't remember the specifics and I probably should have written it down, but we had just like this great conversation where like I knew that I was talking to my dad and he was calling to check in on me. And then we got disconnected and I like got so upset. I'm like, oh no, dad, dad, hello, are you there? And so I ended up calling the number back thinking like, this isn't gonna work because this is not a real number. And he answered,
00:51:12
Speaker
And we talked again for just a couple more minutes or a couple more seconds and he's like, I have to go. I can't talk anymore, but I love you. And I woke up the next morning and I genuinely felt like I had spoken to my dad and I called my mom right away and I was like, you're never gonna believe this, but dad called me last night. Like we spoke on the phone and it was just so nice. And that's really the one dream that I've had that I can recall that was really like, whoa.
00:51:41
Speaker
Yeah, and this is just how you felt afterwards, right? Like how you feel when you wake up that it's like, like you connected and that's that's really like, it was like this feeling that you just never wanted to go away. It was something you just wanted to hold on to because it was so real, even though it was just a dream, but maybe it wasn't knows. But you know, with time, of course, like you can't remember anything as clearly as you did when it first happened. But it was very amazing when it did happen.
00:52:09
Speaker
Yeah, it's so interesting. A lot of dreams just completely like erase and other ones you can remember certain things very, you know, clearly, you know, in most of it. What are some of the hardest parts of your grief that you have encountered? You know, I think what people don't realize, and I've also spoken about this before, like on my own, you know, my own podcast is that
00:52:37
Speaker
When you lose a person, I think people just assume like you're upset and you're grieving the loss of that person, but you're also grieving the loss of your life as you knew it. So for a really long time, I struggled with the fact that, you know, I didn't have my childhood home to come to my childhood home to come home to anymore.
00:52:58
Speaker
The vacations we used to go on as families didn't exist anymore. I always felt like my life, as I knew it, was packed up into X number of boxes and is now just living in my brother's garage. And it was just really hard for me to sort of express that to people. Well, yes, I miss my dad, and that's the hardest of it all. You have to also realize that my life is no longer what it used to be, and it never will be again. And that's just something I have to, over time, get used to.
00:53:28
Speaker
So that, I think, has probably been the hardest thing. And it's, of course, with time, everything gets a little bit easier or it maybe doesn't hurt as often. But it's definitely a lot. And then, of course, always, just like, you know, I try not to think about it too much, but just when my mom has stress and anxiety and worries about things, it always adds stress to me because she is living with someone and she did meet
00:53:56
Speaker
a significant other. So it does ease my pain a little bit because she's not alone. But you know, there's just always that like concern for her because she's the one whose life probably changed the most because she lived with my dad and spent every day with them.
00:54:16
Speaker
Thank you for sharing that. That is so important, what you said, Rami, because, yeah, there are all these other type of secondary losses that occur during grief that those sometimes end up being the ones that kind of shake us sometimes even more. And again, not because this is the thing, you could still maintain that relationship and connection and that love still continues, whether you see your dad or not. But these other things are not going to happen anymore, right? And those things are the ones that we sometimes have to wrap our
00:54:45
Speaker
heads around in that process of grief. So thank you for sharing that because that is important. How did you feel? I was going to say, I don't know how I'll feel, but I'm not married yet and I don't have grandchildren. I don't have grandchildren. I hope I don't have grandchildren. I don't have children, but I can't imagine
00:55:06
Speaker
how I will feel like the bittersweet reaction I'll have when I do get engaged and I do get married and I do have kids because that was something that my dad wanted so badly for me and I know would have made him so happy and so proud to have been there to walk me down the aisle and like do I have to walk down an aisle because I think like while I'd be incredibly happy I would also be completely heartbroken.
00:55:32
Speaker
to be. You're touching on something so important, Rumi, because that's where that aspect of the time heals, how people say, oh, time heals. It's not necessarily true. Actually, I don't think it's true, per se. It's just you become, like you mentioned before, you kind of become
00:55:52
Speaker
Strong or around these aspects of your grief that they don't hit you as hard But even happy moments like what you're even just anticipating for those moments of what it's gonna be and what it's gonna look like Those can also even though they're gonna be happy moments, right? They're still gonna bring that mixture of grief in it because of what you're describing and that's something that we sometimes don't take into account when others are grieving and
00:56:21
Speaker
in those other stages of their life. Sometimes, like you said, like your mom's birthday, how thoughtful of you to know that that was going to be her first birthday without her spouse, that you went beyond any type of gift to do this very meaningful piece for her because you knew what it was going to be.
00:56:43
Speaker
and that this way she could spend that first birthday with him just on her neck, you know, with his name around. And so that is important because people sometimes feel like when you reach out to somebody who is grieving, they maybe reach out the first couple of weeks, month, then they probably don't ask anymore about your grief journey from there on.
00:57:10
Speaker
at all. Definitely. I mean, listen, I have, you're accurate. You're like a hundred percent accurate because I think like we just discussed, people don't realize how every little thing that happens in your life is now affected by the fact that somebody who should have been there is no longer there. And I don't, you know, expect people to get it. If you haven't gone through it, there's really no reason that you should go there. But I do have friends who still on anniversaries and
00:57:38
Speaker
things like that do reach out and it's always so appreciated just because the thought the fact that people you know still realize like this is a hard whether it's a hard day or a hard week or a hard year or a hard you know moment in time they're they're still there but yeah listen people go on with their lives I'm sure that I try to be very cognizant of reaching out to people who have experienced loss and just say I'm thinking about you or
Honoring Her Father Through Jewelry
00:58:07
Speaker
I know this is probably a hard month, but listen, I'm sure I've probably failed over time to remember a specific occasion. And that's just because life gets in the way and people get busy. And especially with this past year, there have been so many losses, not of just even like human beings, but like loss of, you know, your life as you knew it and loss of jobs, loss of homes.
00:58:32
Speaker
Just loss of livelihood in general. So I respect the fact that everybody is going through something challenging at every time in their lives, whether, not every time, but constantly people are being challenged by things that are going on in their lives, regardless of whether or not it's a physical loss or just the loss of something that they loved.
00:58:54
Speaker
No, you said something important. Sometimes we may not remember to contact somebody on that specific anniversary, because again, unless we've written down on our calendar that it's Romy's dad's anniversary, September 29th. What did you say, September 29th? So unless I write it down, when September 29th comes around, I'm probably not going to remember, but maybe
00:59:19
Speaker
Maybe it's September 3rd and I'm sitting there and your name comes to my mind. And I just might just reach out and just say, hey Romy, just wanted to let you know I'm thinking of you. It's as simple as that. When I have a friend's name that comes to my mind, when I dream about them or when I'm in the middle of the day and their name comes to mind,
00:59:43
Speaker
I literally take that opportunity to just like text them, hey, just thought of you, how are you randomly? And it doesn't have to be about grief. But what if in that moment, and it's happened actually to me, happened to me once that it happened to be that my friend's dad had literally just passed away when I messaged her.
01:00:01
Speaker
So it's like you you never know like in those moments like why they're why they're coming to mind so reach out what we have to use that aspect of our intuition to sometimes and and just Call them or message your your friends and family if you think of them I think the fact that if you also reach out to someone just to say like I'm thinking about you or
01:00:31
Speaker
I don't know how it's been the last couple of months, but blah, blah, blah. I think it's also just nice to know that that person is obviously receptive to hearing what you have to say and open to it. And I think a lot of people when they experience loss feel very lonely because there's only so many people that you can speak to about it who understand. So if you have friends who are consistently reaching out just to check on you, even if it's not an anniversary or birthday, you then feel like if you are having a hard time or a hard day,
01:01:00
Speaker
that person will be there and understanding if you need to have a good cry and talk to somebody or go on a walk with someone or grab a coffee with somebody. So I think it's just nice to know that you have a support system if you need it. That is so true. That is so important. Yes.
01:01:16
Speaker
Now let's talk as we wrap up, let's talk about it sincerely and let's talk about what people will be, make sure to put the website on the show notes. But what has it meant for you to create this line now of jewelry inspired by your dad to honor your mom on her birthday, but also honoring your dad?
01:01:38
Speaker
that you started this. What does it mean to you to have this? As you said, this is the way you honor your dad every single day is through your work now too and spreading this love. So share with us.
01:01:51
Speaker
Yeah, I mean, okay, listen, jewelry is amazing. Diamonds are amazing. Gold is amazing. Stones are amazing. I get to make really beautiful jewelry every day, and who doesn't love to do that? But ultimately, what I found over the last four or four and a half years of doing this more exclusively is it's the connections that I've built with my customers, as well as the stories that come with each piece.
01:02:17
Speaker
And that's what I love so much about this brand is that really every person does have a story and every single signature is unique to a specific person, whether they've passed or they're still here. So the fact that I'm able to create pieces that really truly do keep someone's legacy alive because it's a tangible piece of them that you can have with them in beautiful form.
01:02:41
Speaker
is just it's really, really awesome and special and it's always so great when I hear from my customers and I hear how like really having this piece like has made such a huge difference for them and something that was so hard for them now feels a little bit easier because they do have this token of that person's love.
01:02:59
Speaker
Um, I was just chatting with somebody right before this to make sure that their bracelet arrived. I was like, did you get it? And she's like, yes, but is it strange that I'm scared to open it? And I was like, no, don't be scared, but I get it. And she's like, I just don't have anything from my sister except for a coloring book. She gave me as a gift when I was a kid. So the fact that I'm going to have her handwriting that I can wear every single day and be reminded of her.
01:03:25
Speaker
is just so special. And that's just like constant. It's every single piece, even if it's a kid's handwriting to their mom. Like I made a necklace recently that it's there too. The son and the daughter wrote their names. Oh, is that the one you just posted? Yeah. Today that the child, Ethan or something. Yeah, he was like, I know. He was like, he was like more excited. It was so cute. But it's like,
01:03:51
Speaker
Look at how excited the kids were and like proud of themselves. And now she every day gets to have her kids with her and just like, they're just all so uniquely special. And it's again, like created this the reason why I started good grief is because I felt like I had this community.
01:04:07
Speaker
people who had experienced hardships lost and they've all just just done like such an incredible job and handled themselves so gracefully and beautifully and their journeys and some of them have created businesses or like you created a podcast or you know a charity event or a nonprofit organization there's just so much good that has come from all of these hardships so I just wanted to be able to like you share with people and
01:04:35
Speaker
how you might have gone through something so difficult and at the time it feels like there is no light at the end of the tunnel and you'll never ever get there. But now you can listen to all of these amazing stories and know that no matter how hard it is or was or maybe in the future, you will be okay.
01:04:58
Speaker
I get to make amazing, beautiful jewelry. I get to connect with awesome people. And now I really do hope that I'm helping others. The way that I feel like people helped me in the beginning when I was struggling after my dad passed. We pay it forward, right? It's like you kind of just start paying it forward. And so people can find you, then, the jewelry at sincerelyjewelry.com or just SincerelyM. It's sincerelyjewelry.com is the
01:05:25
Speaker
website and then my handle for Instagram is just
01:05:28
Speaker
at Sincerely Jewelry, and then on Facebook, it's also, you just search Sincerely Jewelry. I kept it as simple and easy as possible. As you could. And then, good grief, people can listen to it in your Sincerely Jewelry handle on Instagram, and then also on, we were just talking about before, YouTube. Yes. We created now a YouTube, and how do they find it on YouTube? They just search. Somebody doesn't have Instagram.
01:05:58
Speaker
Yeah, so I think if you go to YouTube and you just search Sincerely Jewelry, that's the name of my channel, so it should just pop up there, but I can also share the URL with you so that you have it if you want to share it. Okay, perfect. I'll put it below. Okay, so the good grief interviews are in the Sincerely Jewelry on YouTube.
01:06:20
Speaker
Yes, exactly. They're all there saved to one playlist. Everything's in one place. Yep. Perfect. Everything's in one place. If I could have a dime for every thought, if you could give me now, I'm going to be thinking of dimes. Every time I see a dime, I'm going to think of you. What would be a final thought you'd like to share? A dime thought for your audience. A dime thought. I always say that
01:06:49
Speaker
I am so grateful, even though I only had my dad for 29 years, I could have had a dad where we had an okay relationship and saw each other once or twice a year on holidays, whatever, and he could have lived till 105 years old. But I had a dad that was so awesome, and we had such an amazing close relationship with, and I wouldn't change it for the world.
01:07:16
Speaker
Even though it was such a short time, I just feel like I was so, so lucky to experience such a special guy for the 29 years that I did. So for anybody who has experienced loss, someone that you were super close with and
01:07:32
Speaker
You know, it's hard just hold on to the fact that not everyone is as lucky as us to have experienced somebody that special in our
Cherishing Relationships and Gratitude
01:07:42
Speaker
lives. So I will never lose sight of that and I will forever be grateful for all of that time and for all of the amazing memories, experiences and things that we share together.
01:07:56
Speaker
And now you're crying and I'm trying not to cry. This is why I don't do so. Romi and I are seeing each other even though I'm only using the audio because this is the reason because then if not, I would have to see myself here crying or oh my goodness. When I watched when I listened to Jenny's episode, I was on a walk and I was sobbing like the part where she said that they used to always honk twice.
01:08:22
Speaker
when they left the house and the person who came to get her mom. They asked, they honked twice when they left. And he honked twice. I was like walking down the street and I was like, Oh God, I can't even contain myself.
01:08:35
Speaker
It's so interesting when you can talk about something so difficult and not cry because sometimes I'm like, how do I get through this without crying? But you've spoken about it so many times that it becomes part of your new routine, your new normal. But when you see how it affects other people, you're like, oh, God, this is hard. This is shitty. This does suck. But listen.
01:09:00
Speaker
whatever happens happens and it is what it is and just be grateful for what you did have with that person. The fact that you have somebody to miss that itself is like that itself. The fact that you had the honor in life to be missing someone.
01:09:19
Speaker
that in itself is a treasure because not everybody has that in whether whatever relationship it is and that is I think that that's what what moved me right now as you were saying that and and that there are a lot of people that maybe don't have that you know to miss you know
01:09:38
Speaker
And he had obviously struck a chord with you because you feel the same way. Absolutely. And I'm just so grateful that you're on this podcast. And thank you for taking the time to share your dad, Steve, with us. It was my pleasure. Thank you so much for having me. And I can't wait to actually listen to it back when it's live. And then I'll obviously share it as well. Thank you so much.
01:10:12
Speaker
Thank you again so much for choosing to listen today. I hope that you can take away a few nuggets from today's episode that can bring you comfort in your times of grief. If so, it would mean so much to me if you would rate and comment on this episode. And if you feel inspired in some way to share it with someone who may need to hear this, please do so.
01:10:41
Speaker
Also, if you or someone you know has a story of grief and gratitude that should be shared so that others can be inspired as well, please reach out to me. And thanks once again for tuning into Grief Gratitude and the Gray in Between podcast. Have a beautiful day.