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Soft Life vs. Hustle Culture: Who Actually Gets to Opt Out?
27 Plays24 days ago
You want the soft life. You're tired of hustling. I texted my friend this morning: "Girl, I wish I had one job that paid for everything." But who actually gets to have a soft life? And is it even possible for most of us right now?
What we're unpacking about soft life vs hustle culture:
- Trad wife isn't soft life, it's unpaid labor unless you're wealthy enough to hire help for everything
- Who gets to opt out, successful influencers can slow down, but most of us are working multiple jobs just to make ends meet
- Economic reality check, gas prices, living expenses increasing, gig work most accessible, we're hustling just to afford life
Influencers are finally being honest that there's no such thing as work-life balance. Sometimes work demands everything, sometimes life does. You can't have a perfect 50/50 pie chart. And for most of us right now? Not having a soft life is just a fact of life. But that doesn't mean you can't work toward it, financial baseline, knowing your security number, recalibrating how you hustle.
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Join the conversation! Are you in your hustling era or have you found your soft life? DM me on Instagram @YourCoachMari!
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Transcript
Introduction to Growing with Sol
00:00:02
Speaker
ah Hello beautiful people and welcome to another installment of the Growing with Sol podcast, where we explore the moments and stories that shape who we're becoming. I'm Marisol and this is where I love to have real conversations about growth, self-discovery and learning to put yourself first.
Embracing the Journey for Women
00:00:18
Speaker
Whether we're diving into books that change our perspective or unpacking personal experiences that teach us something new, this podcast is for women who are done playing small and are ready to embrace their own journey.
00:00:29
Speaker
If you've struggled with putting everyone else first or battled self-doubt, then you're in the right place. This isn't about perfection. It's about the messy, beautiful process of growing into yourself.
00:00:42
Speaker
So come grow with me.
The Desire for Fulfillment
00:00:45
Speaker
Do you want the soft life? I know you are tired of hustling because, girl, I am. i literally texted my friend this morning, the morning of recording this, and I was like, girl, I wish I had a job, one job that paid for everything.
00:01:03
Speaker
And, you know, i have goals, I have plans, I have career goals and financial goals. So, you know, it's it's not that simple, unfortunately. But the sentiment, the feeling, it's there.
00:01:18
Speaker
So a lot of you are probably in a similar situation where you want the soft life. You're tired of hustling. You're tired of having two, three jobs probably. And I get it. 100%
The 'Soft Life' Debate
00:01:31
Speaker
get it.
00:01:31
Speaker
And there has been a lot of conversation around having a soft life and what that means, what that looks like. And I feel like we can easily go on the Internet and see different things.
00:01:45
Speaker
TikToks, video compilations of what that can look like, of people maybe romanticizing their life to look a little bit more like a softer style of living, where it is perhaps not as stressful as constantly hustling or essentially not being consumed by work.
00:02:06
Speaker
But is it possible? Is it truly possible to have a soft life? We're gonna get into it. So what are some trends that we're seeing around this supposed soft life?
Critique of 'Trad Wife' Lifestyle
00:02:17
Speaker
There is a lot of media, especially social media, talking about like the trad wife,
00:02:25
Speaker
A while back, there was like the whole like trad girlfriend type thing going on too. Girl, no, that's dangerous. Don't do that. But like trad wife lifestyle, which is not the soft life. OK, talk to any stay at home mom.
00:02:39
Speaker
It's not the soft life at all, or even just a stay at home wife. If you don't have kids, maybe you don't have kids yet. yeah and Unless you are in a marriage where there's plenty of money to hire people to do all the things for you, it's not a soft life. So don't don't be don't be fooled out there, ladies. Being a tried wife is not a soft life. It's a lot of work, a lot of unpaid labor.
00:03:08
Speaker
Also, given that I am a coach, I am in that like lifestyle business space, I do tend to see a lot of influencers talk about having work-life balance.
Reevaluating Work-Life Balance
00:03:21
Speaker
I've also seen the conversation shifting a lot lately, especially around influencers who talk about their lifestyle, their businesses, and what have you, shifting from not so much a work-life balance conversation, but really finally, in my opinion, admitting that there is no such thing as work-life balance.
00:03:37
Speaker
That there is a time and a place for everything. And we don't always get it right. And sometimes it doesn't matter how much we try to have a balance. Your life, your work is going to dictate where your attention is going to be invested, essentially.
00:03:53
Speaker
So sometimes life dictates that you are just going to go... all in on work and you are burning that midnight oil and that's just what you need to do. And sometimes life is going to dictate or allow you to spend more time with personal stuff or maybe you just have to spend more time on personal matters, family, friends, whatever it might be.
00:04:13
Speaker
But you can never have a beautifully balanced like fifty fifty or however your pie chart breaks down. So finally, we are having that conversation. But for a long time, there was a lot of influencer, business influencer talk about either work-life balance and how to achieve that.
00:04:33
Speaker
Or again, as a millennial, that hustle culture, girl boss culture that has died off a bit. But I do think that hustle culture reinvention just...
00:04:48
Speaker
reinvention of just or maybe not even a reinvention, but a new a new label essentially on how obsessed America is with constantly working.
Influencers and Economic Realities
00:05:01
Speaker
Yeah. But I do also think that when it comes to like especially influencers, since we are talking about being on the online space, I think for a lot of the influencers that we do see online, you could say they're all pretty successful, perhaps doing influencing full time.
00:05:18
Speaker
Maybe they also have like a business. They also do like on top of being influencers or maybe because they are influencers, they were able to begin a business and have it be successful.
00:05:30
Speaker
yeah they they've achieved a certain level of success. So in a what a way, in a matter of speaking, you could say it's easy for them to say at that point to essentially have work-life balance.
00:05:45
Speaker
I would say that for everyone, once you reach a certain level of a success, you can sort of, you know, take your your foot off the gas pedal, okay? You can you can slow down a little bit.
00:05:58
Speaker
So... If that is the case, who really gets to have a soft life? Is it you? Is it me? Maybe not yet.
00:06:10
Speaker
Maybe. Maybe one day. Maybe you have that already. And if you do, amazing, happy for
Hustling: Necessity or Choice?
00:06:15
Speaker
you. But for a lot of us, we do not have a soft life, especially right now in the current economic state of, at this point, in the world.
00:06:25
Speaker
Here in the United States, everything is getting expensive. We, in general, do not have much for public transportation. So our gas prices are just exorbitant at the moment, along with all other living expenses are, have been, not even are, but have been increasing.
00:06:43
Speaker
So in order for us just to afford life, it has already, for one, necessitated having for the average person two jobs. you know, your main job in a society gig, or like maybe for a lot of people, multiple part-time jobs.
00:06:59
Speaker
A lot of people at this point in time are finding that gig work is the most accessible type of work that they can have. And when that's the case, that leads to a whole other host of challenges.
00:07:14
Speaker
But when you have multiple jobs that What is it inherently that you are doing? Baby girl, you are hustling. You are hustling just to make ends meet.
00:07:28
Speaker
And to make ends meet, there's nothing wrong with that. A lot of us have been in that situation where you are constantly putting in crazy amounts of work to make sure those ends meet or even to get ahead, to overcome whatever challenges you are currently facing.
00:07:46
Speaker
And for a lot of us, that is just a fact of life, meaning that for a lot of us, not having a soft life is just a fact of life, at least right now.
Financial Planning for a 'Soft Life'
00:07:58
Speaker
So at this point, what can we do? What is it that we can do if we want a soft life, if we are tired of hustling? That is multifaceted.
00:08:09
Speaker
That is definitely a multifaceted thing to consider because we're going to be taking into account our current economic situation, taking into account your you' essentially your financial situation, what your financial goals are, perhaps looking at what your career goals are as well,
00:08:24
Speaker
And figuring out a plan to get you from point A, where you are right now, to point B, where that goal is. And what is it that you need to do? How many steps is that going to take?
00:08:37
Speaker
It's a lot. It's definitely a lot, but it's something that you can prioritize and work on. Again, talking about finances, I posted recently onto my instagram my Instagram stories that I just reviewed my last four months of finances,
00:08:51
Speaker
And even though it wasn't crazy, i was just like, I could see where I can make wiser spending choices. And i was just talking about that because I do think it's important to talk about finances and have financial transparency around a lot of things.
00:09:04
Speaker
And a friend of mine messaged me afterwards being like, I did the same thing recently and it was the first time I've ever done that. Yeah. what? I'm going to respond. I haven't responded to this brand yet. I haven't responded yet, but I will be responding to her because I have a potential tool for her that she could might utilize and make it easier.
00:09:23
Speaker
But I am someone who loves security. So for me, that tends to involve finances a lot, given the capitalist world that we live in.
00:09:35
Speaker
So I was you know, flabbergasted, okay, that, you know, she hadn't looked at her finances in that detailed type of way as of yet. But I do think it's important.
00:09:46
Speaker
And once we have our baseline picture, we are then able to figure out the steps we need to take in order to create a soft life. That's going to look different for all of us because we all have different careers, different goals.
00:09:59
Speaker
At the same time,
00:10:03
Speaker
in order to have a soft life, We need to have a certain level of financial security. That number can look different for all of us.
00:10:15
Speaker
However, in order to have a soft life, you need to feel safe. You need to feel secure. you need to feel like, you know, if there's an emergency that happens, you can handle it.
00:10:26
Speaker
So an important thing to do in that regard is to figure out what that number is for you and what that looks like for you in order to keep moving forward. Maybe if you are hustling right now, like a lot of us are, maybe hustling is still going to be part of the plan.
00:10:43
Speaker
Maybe the way in which you're hustling is going to look different to reach that goal. So maybe you need to recalibrate, but don't feel discouraged if you are in that hustle stage. I do think given our culture, given our society, given our current economic state, that most of us are at that place.
00:11:03
Speaker
And it is not something to be ashamed of.
Conclusion and Life Coaching Services
00:11:08
Speaker
If you stayed this far, I definitely appreciate you. Thank you for checking into the podcast today. if you have been enjoying the podcast, if this resonates with you, definitely give it a thumbs up. And don't forget to subscribe.
00:11:20
Speaker
Also share it out with a friend because you sharing that definitely helps us grow as a community. Thank you again for tuning in today. If you are also looking for any kind of support in your growth, in your journey, your healing journey, perhaps, definitely feel free to reach out to me. I am a certified life coach and I am accepting clients.
00:11:38
Speaker
And you can schedule your very own discovery call with me through the link in the show notes. Until next time, keep growing.