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Healing Books That Changed My Life: A Reading Journey Through Recovery
21 Plays6 days ago
Books became essential to my healing journey from trauma, depression, and emotional abuse. Three specific books guided me through understanding what happened, building unbreakable boundaries, and reconnecting with the parts of myself I'd lost.
Three healing books:
- "Whole Again" by Jackson MacKenzie validates your experience and teaches self-forgiveness
- "Boundaries After a Pathological Relationship" by Adelyn Birch is short, direct, essential
- ACOTAR by Sarah J. Maas helped me reconnect with my love of reading and myself
My coach gave me assigned reading as part of my healing work. These books became homework, validation, strategy, and eventually, joy. Reading for healing isn't just about information. It's about seeing yourself in the pages and knowing you're not alone.
Reconnecting with reading was reconnecting with who I was before the trauma. Old Marisol loved reading. That got lost. Getting it back was getting myself back.
Subscribe. Share. Remember that healing has many forms and sometimes it comes through the pages of a book.
Small steps, big healing. Keep growing! ✨
Join the conversation! What book has helped you heal? DM me on Instagram @YourCoachMari!
📚 Books mentioned:
- Whole Again: Jackson MacKenzie
- Boundaries After a Pathological Relationship: Adelyn Birch
- ACOTAR (A Court of Thorns and Roses): Sarah J. Maas
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Transcript
Introduction to 'Growing With Soul'
00:00:00
Speaker
Hello beautiful soul and welcome back to another installment of the Growing With Soul podcast where we explore the moments and stories that shape who we're becoming. I'm Marisol and this is where I love to have real conversations about growth, self-discovery and learning to put yourself first.
00:00:16
Speaker
Whether we're diving into books that change our perspective or unpacking personal experiences that teach us something new, this podcast is for women who are done playing small and are ready to embrace their own journey.
00:00:28
Speaker
If you've struggled with self-doubt or putting everybody else first, you're in the right place. This isn't about perfection. It's about the messy, beautiful process of growing into yourself.
00:00:39
Speaker
So come grow with me.
The Start of Marisol's Healing Journey
00:00:42
Speaker
When I set about healing from the depression I was experiencing, from the CPTSD, I didn't really think that I was going to have homework, essentially. I didn't think that it was going to include reading, but it did.
00:01:00
Speaker
It showed up right away in my healing journey, essentially, and in two pivotal forms. And basically what happened, my so my studying essentially came about because of the coach I was working with gave me a signed reading. And like a good a little academic, essentially, like the academic I can be at times, I dove right in. Okay. I ate that shit up. I was like, yes, give me homework. That's where I thrive in an academic setting.
00:01:31
Speaker
And that was definitely... similar So my coach that i was working with gave me two specific books to read.
Impact of 'Whole Again' on Understanding Narcissistic Abuse
00:01:39
Speaker
The first one was Whole Again, Healing Your Heart and Rediscovering Your True Self After Toxic Relationships and Emotional Abuse by Jackson McKenzie.
00:01:50
Speaker
This book.
00:01:53
Speaker
and It's kind of difficult to to like pinpoint my headspace and like my emotional state, especially back then. If you've ever experienced depression, if you've experienced emotional abuse and like i like where you're at mentally and emotionally like afterwards, once you're out of that situation, you knows it's kind of difficult to give it words.
00:02:14
Speaker
But I was like, okay, I at least am familiar with reading and like reading texts, you know? um So like, let me let me at least look at this through an academic standpoint. So like, I opened the book, I got the book. I didn't even know really what to expect. But what that book, what this book essentially does really well is break down different conditions, different topics, such as ah you know, complex CBTSD, CBTSD, which is I mentioned earlier, narcissistic abuse, avoiding personality disorder, co-dependency, wounding, shame, know, BPD, borderline personality disorder, and a slew of other things as well.
00:03:02
Speaker
So kind of goes in, well, not kind of, it does go into detail explaining what these things are and what, like, what it can look like. And it gives, like, a little, not a synopsis, what are they called? An anecdote, essentially, of someone who...
00:03:19
Speaker
is healing from having experienced those things or been with someone who was experiencing those things that negatively impacted them. And the narcissistic abuse part really did resonate with what I experienced, which upon reading that section,
00:03:40
Speaker
It was so validating. Like I didn't expect it to be. i kind of went into it the way I would approach like studying. I was like, okay well, let me at least learn about these things through this standpoint.
00:03:51
Speaker
Maybe that'll give me something. it'll It'll just give me more information, at least, you know, for the future. But it it gave me a lot of validation as well. Seeing it written on the page and knowing that there are people out there who get it.
00:04:06
Speaker
Because if you've ever experienced emotional abuse, narcissistic abuse, you know, whatever it may be, you know, similar to that, um you probably resonate with like,
00:04:17
Speaker
It being difficult to describe and it being like the impact of it being difficult to convey. Because there have been times where like I'm trying to explain like some of the things I've experienced.
00:04:30
Speaker
And like you could just tell that like the the other person, it kind of it falls flat for the other person. Like how was that so horrible? Kind of like written on their face. And it's like, no, you don't understand like Like it's, it was the constant every day, like all of it all the time. and they're just like, and I don't get it, but I can see that it impacted you kind of a situation. So just knowing that there were people out there who got it who understood it and understood its impact and how negatively it can impact you.
00:05:00
Speaker
ah it was so validating to see that. The book also um goes into different strategies for healing healing. and You know, it goes into boundaries and things
Healing Strategies from Recommended Books
00:05:13
Speaker
like that as well. And the way that it goes about doing that, it does have a whole section dedicated to that, but it also has it broken down, kind mentioned with those anecdotes per different like condition and how you can heal and the different strategies to heal per what you may have experienced per like a condition.
00:05:32
Speaker
um It definitely talks about self-forgiveness, which was a huge part of my healing. um And like I mentioned, it also goes into other strategies as well.
00:05:45
Speaker
The second book that I read as part of my healing process, which was also recommended to me by the coach that I was working with, was Boundaries After a Pathological Relationship by Adeline Birch.
00:05:57
Speaker
This is a short book. it is It's a tiny book. Very short book. It's straight to the point. So especially for somebody who is dealing with depression and you're just like, i don't have the motivation to do anything, at least that book is short because if it was like a giant book and you're like super depressed, you just want to waste away in bed, you're not going to read it But...
00:06:17
Speaker
As someone who read it while they were very depressed, you know, it's tiny but mighty, okay? It essentially breaks down what a boundary is. It goes into different, like, ways in which you can create a boundary and how to stick to them, which is the crux of a boundary.
00:06:38
Speaker
There's no point, really, in setting a boundary and then just folding over the second somebody gives you a little bit of pushback. That's not how boundaries work. And it also goes into, like signs and like ways in which you can identify a weak boundary.
00:06:53
Speaker
Because sometimes it can be a little tricky. I mean, we're talking about the human experience, like there's always going to be gray areas and nuance and things like that. So the book definitely goes into how to look for maybe a weak boundary and what to do to improve it so that you do have rock solid boundaries. And quite frankly, this is pivotal information if you have experienced emotional abuse or like I mentioned, like in our previous series on this podcast, if you tend to operate from a place of people pleasing because people pleasing and lack of boundaries, they go together.
00:07:29
Speaker
They definitely go together and also being the victim of emotional abuse. You know, I'm right here. Okay. Yeah. That was my experience. So Boundaries After a Pathological Relationship by Adeline Birch. Fantastic. Quick read.
00:07:44
Speaker
And there are times where I think about revisiting these books, but I'm not in the headspace to do it, to be quite frankly, andd be honest and transparent about where I am. Like i've I've done the studying. I've lived it.
00:07:58
Speaker
um I've done a lot of healing and I just have Maybe not revisit those exact books, but maybe read other ones to get maybe a different perspective on said topic and what have you. But like in terms of where I was at the very beginning stages of my healing when I read these books, they were a great help.
00:08:20
Speaker
This next book that was a part of my healing journey is a little bit of a curveball, not something that I was expecting, and definitely not something you're probably expecting.
Reigniting a Love for Reading
00:08:33
Speaker
But through the behest, through the recommendation of a friend of mine, a very dear friend of mine, I picked up ACOTAR. That is right. Court of Thorns and a Roses by Sarah J. Maas.
00:08:46
Speaker
I picked up that book when I was... had i had already done a lot of healing by the time that I read ACOTAR for the first time. And i was I had seen that book years ago prior to picking it up. And I remember taking a picture of it like, oh, this looks like something old Marisol would have been really into.
00:09:09
Speaker
Let me take a picture of this and get back to it when I'm not so broke I can buy myself a book. And then my friend told me about it. And I was like, okay, like this friend of mine and I never talked about books before.
00:09:22
Speaker
But if she's saying it's really good, i suppose it is. it kind of rings a bell. And then I looked at the image of the book and I was just like, this looks familiar. And then I saw that I had a picture in my phone of that book from Barnes & Noble from like two years prior. And I was like, okay, clearly my BFF and Old Amati Sol You know, they have something in common here that I need to pick up on. So i read ACOTAR and by the end of it, I was hooked. Okay.
00:09:50
Speaker
To the point where like, I had the second one. and then i remember being in the office and I was like, I'm going to finish A Court of Mist and Fury.
00:10:03
Speaker
by the end of the day. Like tonight I'm going to finish like A Court of Mist and Fury. I'm going to need ACA War as soon as I finish it. So let me during my lunch hour drive all the way to Barnes & Noble, pick up ACA War during my lunch. Literally, I drove 20 minutes. had an hour lunch, drove 20 minutes to Barnes & Noble, picked up the book, paid for it, picked up lunch quickly and drove another 20 minutes back to to work.
00:10:28
Speaker
That was my lunch hour were gone just to get one thing. But that's how hooked I was. Okay. And why is this part of my healing journey? Because like I've said many times on this podcast, an integral part of who I was, you know, old Marisol prior to all the anguish,
00:10:48
Speaker
I was an avid reader. i was reading all the time in college a little bit. I still read, but eventually college took over and all the college reading and all that, you know, took over my life. So I didn't read for fun as much as you know, everybody who's experienced, all my readers out there have may have experienced in college. um All the college reading takes over your life so you don't read for fun anymore.
00:11:12
Speaker
And then after college is eventually when all, The craziness happened that led to the depression and CBTSD, which killed my creativity and killed my love and joy of reading and really me seeking out joy in general.
00:11:27
Speaker
So reading a fun book again that did capture me the way that books in the past captured Old Mighty Soul. was very healing for me and now i am in a place where I'm reading 25 30 books a year and enjoying it so much I've been I've read books by Holly Black which when I was like what 13 and like Tithe came out like Wrath Warp and Rye was my very first book boyfriend and like I loved Holly Black and I read like what it Valiant like afterwards like you know like
00:12:03
Speaker
Revisiting some of my favorite authors when I was you know reading young adult books at the time, like it's just very healing, a way of reconnecting with my old self that is still in there.
Creativity's Role in Healing
00:12:15
Speaker
And on top of that, I've been doing more creative writing as well as part of that, which... my creativity having died previously and has now been brought back to life is a very big deal for me and a very, i don't know what the word is, but a highly significant portion of my healing process.
00:12:40
Speaker
If you are interested in reading these books, I have a link to them below. Some of them are through my book list through bookshop.org. And you can also check out my entire book list as well in case you're curious about other books that I've read and have really enjoyed. They have to do with healing, with just general nonfiction stuff. um A lot of them also have to do with like fiction, romanticcy, romance in general, and and all of that. So definitely check out my book list for other recommended readings just for funsies. um And if you have resonated with this, if you have read these books and have thoughts and opinions, definitely let me know in the comments down below. But if this resonated with you, definitely let me know as well. Don't forget to like and subscribe and to share that with somebody who you think could benefit from this as well.
00:13:32
Speaker
Until next time, keep growing.