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EP655: Arwen Becker - Cause-Driven Marketing Can Help You Build A Massive Business
75 Plays7 days ago
“You need to be present where your feet are planted. You can't rush the process. And worse yet, when we are achieving a goal and we're in the pursuit of a goal, if all we're focused on is the goal and not the journey, we get to the goal and it's very fleeting.”
Marketing isn’t just about being seen—it’s about being intentional. The most successful businesses don’t wait for customers to come to them; they create compelling messages that attract, engage, and convert. When marketing is driven by purpose, it becomes a force multiplier, turning small efforts into massive impact.
Arwen Becker built her business by recognizing an underserved market and reshaping her entire strategy to meet its needs. Through bold marketing moves, she didn’t just grow—she scaled beyond what she thought possible. Her journey proves that the right strategy, persistence, and a willingness to pivot can change everything.
Arwen is a speaker, endurance athlete, and entrepreneur who transformed the financial industry by focusing on women. She grew and sold her company at 20 times its original valuation.
Expert action steps:
1. Small, consistent actions lead to big results. Success doesn’t come from one big move—it’s built over time with daily habits and small, intentional steps. The key is consistency, as small efforts compound into significant achievements.
2. Take responsibility and put in the work. No one else can do it for you. Set priorities, start your day with intention, and tackle the most important tasks before distractions take over. Success requires discipline and effort.
3. Be present in the journey, not just the goal. Focusing solely on the end result can make accomplishments feel fleeting. Instead, embrace the process, learn from challenges, and appreciate each step along the way. The journey is what truly shapes success.
Learn more and connect:
1. Arwen’s Website: https://www.arwenbecker.com
2. Arwen’s Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/arwenbecker
3. Arwen’s YouTube Channel: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UC3gOZ3q8xg5kXjJd4p6l6xQ
4. Book: She Handled It, So Can You: https://www.amazon.com/She-Handled-Can-You-Empowering/dp/173539050X
5. Book: She Handled It, Retirement: https://lifewitharwen.com/books/
Visit https://www.eCircleAcademy.com and book a success call with Nicky to take your practice to the next level.
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Transcript
Start Your Day Right
00:00:03
Speaker
You have to run the miles. You have to do the work. Nobody can do it for you. um Don't sit around expecting somebody to do it for you. Work on your schedule, get up early, start your day off doing those things that really matter before life starts dictating what you're gonna be doing with your day.
Introduction & Purpose
00:00:24
Speaker
Welcome to the Thought Leader Revolution with Nikki Ballou. Join the revolution. There's never been a better time in history to speak your truth, find your freedom, and make your fortune. Each week, we interview the world's top thought leaders and learn the secrets of how they built a six to seven figure practice.
00:00:42
Speaker
This episode has been brought to you by ecircleacademy.com, the proven system to add six to seven figures a year to your thought leader practice.
00:00:53
Speaker
Welcome to another exciting up episode of the podcast, The Thought Leader Revolution.
Meet Arwen Becker
00:00:57
Speaker
your host, Nicky Ballou, and boy, do we have an exciting guest lined up for you today. Today's guest is a dear friend of ah good friend, and she is someone who has taken a bold stand for women, for real women, and for the right of women to be safe.
00:01:20
Speaker
In this day and age, you wouldn't think that'd be controversial, but sadly, that's not true. I am speaking, of course, of none other than the one, the only, the legendary Arwen Becker. Welcome to the show, Arwen.
00:01:32
Speaker
Thank you, Nikki. I love that. What a great intro. I feel great. I can just go ahead and leave because I'm so built up already just by that. Thank you. So listen, Arwen, the people that listen to this show are freedom-loving entrepreneurs. They're the men and women who, in my opinion, move the human race forward because they've got the passion and the courage to dream.
00:01:56
Speaker
And they come to this show, not because of me, because I'm here every week. They're here to listen to you, to learn from you about how they can expand, how they can be
Habits and Learning
00:02:04
Speaker
better. You know, I had a guest on a few weeks ago. He said something really brilliant. He said that most of us are driven by our habitual thoughts and actions. And he said that 95% of our thoughts and actions are habitual.
00:02:18
Speaker
So if you want to change that, you need to listen to people who have different thoughts and suggest that you do different actions. So, They got to get to know you though, before they can really open themselves up to you. So tell us your backstory. How'd you get to be the great Arlen Becker?
00:02:34
Speaker
So I guess let me give you 50 years in three minutes, right? Perfect. Okay. So I began my life as an athlete. um I have always been involved in athletics, plain and simple.
00:02:45
Speaker
um I was a competitive swimmer at a very young age, age of six is when I started. And really over the course of most of my life, I have played two and three sports. at a time all the way up through college.
00:02:59
Speaker
um I was the top athlete in a four a school here outside of Seattle in the area called Kirkland where I currently live. um And then I played division one volleyball at the University of Washington.
00:03:12
Speaker
ah There, I earned a zoology degree, wanted to work with animals. Since the age of five, there was nothing else that I wanted to do. And then um towards the end of my college time, I landed a job at the second largest wildlife rehabilitation center in the state of Washington. So I got to work with every wild animal known to man in the state of Washington, raised many of them from babies. It was the coolest job, the absolute
Career Challenges and Changes
00:03:41
Speaker
coolest job.
00:03:41
Speaker
Um, and, uh, it ended up being the first job I was ever fired from my dream job and I was fired from it. And so I needed to get what everybody, uh, well, many people in my life called a quote unquote real job because I received a stipend. I didn't make a lot of money doing that.
00:04:00
Speaker
And so I happened to have a girlfriend who, um, knew I was looking for a job. Well, When I lost my job there, i would say that was the beginning to the end of my marriage at the time.
00:04:13
Speaker
So I had married my high school sweetheart. So I was divorced 24, needing a job. And my girlfriend was sitting in this coffee shop. A guy needed her table. They started talking. He said, I'm new to the building, just launched a company. Do you know if anybody who might be looking for a job?
00:04:27
Speaker
So she connected the two of us. I accepted that position. And in the same week at 24, accepted Christ as my Lord and Savior. So all this was kind of happening at the same time. Praise God. yeah Yeah, absolutely. No doubt about it. Changed my life forever.
Empowering Women
00:04:44
Speaker
And so that man who hired me became my business mentor, my business partner. of years later, my husband, and now we've celebrated 20 years of marriage just this last year. So god one job interview. yeah Thank you. You never know where it might happen.
00:05:02
Speaker
And um so I actually fell in love with my next career. i never imagined doing anything that didn't have anything to do with animals, um but I actually fell in love with financial planning. I was always good with numbers. I loved this idea of helping people in this last season of life of really being able to live when they've worked their whole career, 30, 40 years to earn a paycheck and some money.
00:05:27
Speaker
to be able to live a great life for that final season. And so it really became something I was very interested in, very passionate about, and I got to with my best friend in the world, my husband. And so ah during that time, we raised three boys and about 16 years into the company, I landed in the ah ER.
00:05:46
Speaker
I thought I was having a heart attack. Um, I, it was debilitating stress and I was just done with the pressure. We had lived through the dot bomb. We lived through the great recession, which as a financial company it was nearly our complete undoing.
00:06:02
Speaker
And, um, So I was in the ER, it was just debilitating stress. And um that night i I was just like, I'm done. I want to sell it. And so I initiated the sale of our company. And God told me very clearly after I did it and was nearly, it was all complete. I mean, disc clo people were laid off, employees were laid off. We already had new office space, sublease documents were signed. All of it was done.
00:06:24
Speaker
God said, you do that, Arwen, it will end your marriage. And so i called it off. And that led to just this next season of life for me, which ended up being we shifted our entire company to marketing to women. We at most of our company was male advisors and half our staff was men. But I really saw a huge need to serve women in the financial planning industry. I felt my industry did it very poorly.
00:06:53
Speaker
um A lot of women, especially single, divorced, never married women were really left out of the financial conversation. And even a lot of married women were left out of the conversation. And so that's what our company did. We transitioned.
00:07:05
Speaker
And um eventually that led to me training advisors nationally to keynoting on the topic to writing a couple of books. And in June of 22, we sold our company and for 20 times what I was going to sell it for in 2016, mind you. So that was a big, big deal for any entrepreneur out there who is in the dip as Seth Godin talks about.
00:07:30
Speaker
um I know what that's like. ah And in 22, also gave up alcohol. I started my endurance um athletic career and, um,
00:07:41
Speaker
It was that same year that my alma mater, the university of Washington offered a athletic scholarship to a boy to play on the team I was on.
00:07:52
Speaker
And that was when this, this feeling, um, just this deep unrest. Cause I have, you know, I have no daughters. I don't have quote unquote, a dog in the fight right now. Um, but I just had to look back at my 10 year old self changing in the locker rooms as a, um, you know, a young swimmer,
00:08:11
Speaker
a very insecure girl as most 10 year olds would be. um And I just, I couldn't handle it. It just was it was creating so much turmoil. And so it really led me to partner with XXXY Athletics, and to start using my platform, which it was always identified as this only positive motivational content found here.
00:08:34
Speaker
I had to come to a day where I drew a lie in the sand. You know, I had talked to my my family and and certainly spent some time in prayer about it. And just saying that I know that God's calling me into this space and I have to be willing to take all of it um and open myself up to the negativity that I'd worked so hard to avoid.
00:08:53
Speaker
And now I'm in this third season of my life of kind of reinventing what I'm doing, but more importantly, just being able to really be a light to others. And more importantly, young girls who are just like me, who are having their opportunities stripped from them and expected to speak up about it at the age of 13, 14, 15. So me turning 50 this year, it's the least I can do for my younger self and all those girls coming up behind me.
Political and Social Reflections
00:09:20
Speaker
So there it is. Three, four minutes of 50 years. so Wow.
00:09:25
Speaker
That's a heck of a story. i mean I mean, to unpack it all, you're woman who was an athlete. You played ah Division I volleyball. That's a big deal.
00:09:37
Speaker
You got married to your high school sweetheart, divorced at 24, but also accepted Christ as your Lord and Savior. um Married a great great man, been married 20 plus years, three boys, built a business, and um got a message from God to do it a little differently, ah and kept the business, and then built it and sold it. And now you've been speaking all over ah America.
00:10:06
Speaker
And when you saw what was being done, By your alma mater, you decided to get involved and speak up. I brought Jen Say on my podcast. In fact, I'm interviewing her again on Monday with a couple other apparel company folks who have cause-driven apparel companies, so should be a pretty cool interview.
00:10:26
Speaker
ah And... I'm very much um resonating with with women and men who are conviction driven.
00:10:38
Speaker
Growing up, my two favorite politicians were Margaret Thatcher and Ronald Reagan. And... god that woman was tough as nails you know what everyone says you could not knock her off course she spoke the truth as she saw it and i just ah i just loved her you know um she was uh she was the mom uh she was my kind of like surrogate mom out there ah who basically stood up for what was right And I think the the last hundred years have been interesting because the forces of godless communism have been on the march within Western countries like the United States, like Canada, attempting to turn them against themselves from within. And I believe they've in large measure had a lot of success in doing that and really,
00:11:35
Speaker
What's amazing is that the American people this November decided they'd had enough of that and they elected Donald Trump. And I think lot of people are feeling hopeful and optimistic for the first time that the the folks in power on our side. And I'm just wondering what your thoughts are on all that.
00:11:54
Speaker
Yeah. You know, that the part that that always resonates with me when people talk about the fact that Trump got elected, that people just had enough. the The sheer realization that people had to overcome the narrative and still vote for him.
00:12:11
Speaker
That was the thing that, um, that so just tells me how sick and tired people were with what was happening here in the States and, um, the path that we were on and the censorship of a lot of conservative voices of people who, who don't go out there yelling at you. They're just, you know, silently praying outside of an abortion clinic and they get thrown in jail for it. I mean, it's just 20 years. Absolute.
00:12:37
Speaker
Crazy craziness, like like older women. I mean, like women that are in their 60s and 70s. And it's just wheremos that exactly. And it's it was that that fact that people people were still willing to say, I will vote for 34 time convicted felon and all the other things that the the media spun about him.
00:13:00
Speaker
because they were just so tired of it. They were tired of being told that they're bad, that they're racist, that they are misogynistic, that they are, they're supposed to not see color, but yet they're supposed to see race and everything. And it's just like all of these components that,
00:13:16
Speaker
Just the the silent majority. I mean, that's when I changed the tagline. It was like think the day that I was like, okay, this is, I'm changing my platform. You're going to see something totally different for me and you you may not like it, but it's what you're going to see. I'm going give you where I am. And it's that I'm tired of being the silent majority.
00:13:34
Speaker
yeah I'm tired of being the people that I get the emails from. that I, of course, hear from many people who are in this space and speaking up for girls' rights in sports and safe spaces and things like that, those private emails of people going, yeah, I totally support you.
00:13:48
Speaker
I'm like, but you wouldn't even have the guts to wear an XXXY hat outside. and ah And that's the part that it that so frustrates me is that there is such a massive silent majority, but most of them still are unwilling to just...
00:14:04
Speaker
be open about even a little bit, maybe share a post or like certain posts or um just speak up even ever so slightly. I mean, it's not you don't have to grandstand, but to just be willing to publicly make your beliefs known and be that lighthouse for other people to say, Oh, ah okay, they believe the same that I do. Okay, it gives me a little more encouragement. And so There have been many women like Jen Say, like Riley Gaines, like Megyn Kelly, that I have gotten a lot of if influence and just inspiration from that
00:14:41
Speaker
the negativity that will absolutely come. It absolutely comes. And it hits you like a ton of bricks, right? When you entered in this space. And I just think that's totally the devil. I mean, a hundred percent.
00:14:53
Speaker
It's just like, he's going to just all of a sudden throw it at you really, really hard and fast in hopes that you just turn around and tuck tail and say, nevermind, it's just too hard. And um just seeing them and and hearing them be willing to just continue to speak up for common sense. And what, what the vast,
00:15:10
Speaker
vast majority of us believe in that there is a biological difference between men and women. They should not be complete competing in sports together and they should not be sharing prisons and they should not be sharing locker rooms. And if that is the controversial statement, I have to be willing and I am willing to stand in that as long as it takes to go back to what it was that it always was, which was not controversial.
00:15:36
Speaker
ah Yeah. Like the, the forces of darkness, the forces of the devil, as you put it, ah ah honestly are out to destroy good. And they're out to destroy the United States and the United States, more than anything to me is an idea more than it's a country. It's an idea. It's an idea that men and women can live free, can govern themselves, can choose how they live.
00:16:04
Speaker
And, uh, an idea that, the men and women of the United States are godly people, that they believe in God and that they live their lives in a godly fashion.
00:16:15
Speaker
And to me, you know, when I read history books, that was accepted as a matter of course at the time of the founding of the United States, throughout the eighteen hundreds throughout much of the 1900s.
00:16:29
Speaker
It's only in the last 10 years that that became controversial in certain circles. But I think the folks that tried to make that controversial are all about fundamentally transforming the United States to something different.
00:16:41
Speaker
That's what Barack Obama said he wanted to do when he got elected, right? He wanted to fundamentally transform the United States. And I believe folks like him are on the side of the devils, not the angels.
00:16:54
Speaker
And we all need to stand up for common sense things like boys and girls are different, gender dysphoria being experienced by someone does not mean that the rest of us need to pretend that their dysphoria is not our reality.
00:17:13
Speaker
And it is absolutely insane that some men with serious mental problems are now being told that you can go step into women's spaces and hey, you don't actually have to go through the steps of turning yourself physically into a woman. You don't have to go and have surgery and remove your genitals and get breasts added to yourself and and have a hormone shot. You can just say, I'm a woman now.
00:17:41
Speaker
And then you can go any woman's space. And my God, that's nuts. To me, that's nuts. you know yeah Yeah. And that the the thing that that has really just lit a fire for me as I've been talking about this more and speaking out more is I'm frustrated with the abdication of responsibility going to teenage girls.
00:18:08
Speaker
these athletes. I mean, most teenage girls by the time when I started my, my college career i was 17. Yeah. I was an insecure 17 year old. I was a people pleaser. I've spent, I am a child of an alcoholic. I, I am the kid who is always going to do what the coach tells me, even if it hurts me.
00:18:27
Speaker
um even if it's destructive, even if, uh, it's not good. um That's been something that I've had to work through in the last 10 years with a therapist is recognizing those things that are unhealthy about my driven nature and my willingness to to do what's asked of me. and And that's the part that just so frustrates me because...
00:18:49
Speaker
Here you're expecting an insecure, young, still developing, still very much cares what her peers think of her and the system in which she is in, her school, her sports teams, all of that.
00:19:06
Speaker
And we're expecting her The amount of people are like, yeah, well, until all those girls sit down and stop competing, it's like, so you're abdicating your responsibility. You're telling just like me, i have no girls who are enduring this right now, but now I've become friends with those girls.
00:19:23
Speaker
So now I do have girls who have been willing to stand up. And every time I get a message or i speak to any of them, it always brings me to tears because I'm just like, would I have had that courage as a 15, very driven 15 year old, but man, I was still the one who would often not say anything just to keep the peace.
00:19:44
Speaker
sure And we're expecting them to do that. And that's the part of the silent majority that it's like, if everybody just like me can be willing to just say, no, this is not acceptable. If the parents are willing to just say this is not acceptable, but everybody's avoiding it for the same reasons. They don't want to get the pushback.
00:20:05
Speaker
They don't don't want to get labeled. They don't want to get deplatformed or, you know, get called in by their boss. Like Jen say, you read her book. It's all throughout there of what happened when she started speaking up about, um you know, COVID, the COVID lockdowns and kids in schools and,
00:20:21
Speaker
You know, and and her her superiors were okay for a while until the heat got turned up too much and people started, you know, demanding on pitchforks that she got fired. And, you know, that that's, it's a very real thing. i don't discount that.
00:20:36
Speaker
But it's just like anything. If we band together, doesn't even take that many of us, but more than the fringe majority that are just really loud, aggressive and, you know, mean, very, very mean.
00:20:50
Speaker
um This is this is how we change it. And that's the part that really frustrates me. And so that's the part I'm hoping to lend my voice to as a woman who's is still very much in
Endurance and Achievement
00:21:03
Speaker
athletics. I love my endurance events that I do training for.
00:21:07
Speaker
ah I have at least three on the calendar this year. I'm. I specifically do. it Well, i'm and I'm doing a ah half marathon in a couple of weeks. That's just kind of like things that just throw on my calendar. It's funny because I was never an endurance athlete. All of my athletics were sprints. So I never thought I could do anything like that. But I'm actually officially an endurance hiker. So actually this logo that's on my chest, if you can see it, it's for an event called 29029.
00:21:33
Speaker
twenty nine oh twenty nine Very simply stated, it's an endurance hike, many different mountains. Like I've done Montreblanc, I've done ah Whistler, I've done Jackson Hole, Wyoming, Utah, a number of places.
00:21:47
Speaker
But the premise is very simple. You hike up the mountain and then you ride the gondola down and you repeat that until you hit 29,029 vertical feet, which is the equivalent to Mount Everest. Mount Everest, yeah. And you have 36 hours to do it.
00:22:01
Speaker
Shut up. So there's your endurance hike. That's awesome.
00:22:10
Speaker
I should introduce you to my lady love, Theresa. So Theresa's done like 23 marathons. She's a crazy marathoner. And then she, in her late forties, she decided just for shits and giggles to um break a world record for most distance run over 12 hours on a treadmill. And then she didn't do it once, but three times. So she set three Guinness world records. She's into all this crazy stuff.
00:22:36
Speaker
So how far, what how far did she um God. 90 plus kilometers, 90 plus kilometers. That was pretty, it was pretty intense.
00:22:47
Speaker
I did the first hour, the first time with her, like you, I'm more of a sprinter. So it just, you know, good for her. Yeah. Yeah. She, the two of you would, would get along. She's, she's thinks like that. that's She's like us. You'd like her. She's good lady. Um, we work together in our business as well, just like you and your husband do. So it's, it's kind of a thing.
00:23:05
Speaker
Uh, But really, really cool. Really, really cool. You know, was thinking of this beautiful quote um from Edmund Burke that goes something like this. The only condition necessary for the triumph of evil is for good men to do nothing.
00:23:20
Speaker
Yeah. And that really has been, unfortunately, um something that the bad guys have been counting on. And part of their strategy, if you if you ever want to find out how they work, you should get a book and read it called Rules for Radicals by a guy named Saul Alinsky.
00:23:39
Speaker
And he talks about how to um defeat the the squares, people like us. And basically they accuse you of what they're doing, right?
00:23:51
Speaker
So they'll call you a racist when they're the ones who are the racists. They belittle you, they mock you, and their entire strategy is to get you to shut up. Because if you don't fight back, they win.
00:24:03
Speaker
Right. Right. So, um, I'm originally, one of the things, Zicky, I was going to tell you that I have seen in the most absolutely massive way is all, but one of the girls that I have really connected with throughout this process, you know, and I would say, or, you know, 22 and under who have been either in college or in high school. I actually just, um,
00:24:29
Speaker
contacted a girl here in the state of Washington who just a couple of days ago, ah JV game, just, you know, refused to compete because there was a ah ah man on one of the other teams.
00:24:40
Speaker
And the teachers union is looking into her ah but for bullying. So this is post Trump, right? And so this is still going on. This isn't just like overnight, anything getting fixed.
00:24:52
Speaker
um But the overwhelming ah commonality of these very brave girls to speak up and speak out and say, I'm unwilling to compete. And a lot of them, it's just by not competing and saying why they didn't not being mean, you know, any of that kind of stuff.
00:25:11
Speaker
They're all devout Christian women who have a very strong faith in God. And that to me is so telling because in order to look, ah this kind of,
00:25:27
Speaker
evil, this kind of um oppression, this kind of you better sit down, be quiet, not speak out all the negativity that comes with it.
00:25:38
Speaker
You know, the trolling, the death threats that, you know, there's special places in hell for you. this is not Christian like all the things that I've also got as well. um That is the one commonality that I have seen through almost every single one of these girls is that they have a strong faith.
00:25:55
Speaker
And part of that is because they know inherently, just as I do, that they were created with a purpose.
Gender Identity and Advocacy
00:26:04
Speaker
They were created by the, you know, incredible creator who created, you know, the mountains that I can see out my window and Mount Rainier and all these beautiful places that I get to hike.
00:26:14
Speaker
that he so delicately and with intention created each one of us with a design and didn't do it haphazardly. If he knows every little feather on the sparrows that are outside my windows, how much more? It says, how much more does he know about us? Every hair on my head is numbered. I got a lot of hair. Yeah.
00:26:37
Speaker
And so all of these girls, and I've seen that as such a commonality because they have this this they're rooted in a belief that they know that they were created for something.
00:26:48
Speaker
But then that goes secondarily to, I also believe that all the people I come in contact with, no matter where they're at in their journey, God created them with a purpose as well.
00:27:00
Speaker
unmistakably, every bad thing that's happened to me in my life and all the horrible things that I've gone through have always led me to the, when I've got to the other side going, Oh yeah, I just certainly didn't see it at the time. I can't believe I had to go through that. But now I understand.
00:27:15
Speaker
I understand why you wanted me to go through that because it was something I needed to learn. So I could now be a hand up to people who are coming behind me or suffering from the same issue or struggling with it. And so, you know, just knowing that about themselves also makes you ah understand that about other people.
00:27:32
Speaker
It's like i I have a lot of empathy for people who are struggling with gender dysphoria. Truly, just like ah anorexia. But as I heard Chloe Cole, one of the detransitioners talk about, she said, she said, what's happening now is that we have doctors who are talking to these kids coming in who are saying, i believe I'm in the wrong body. Help me like chop things up and change it all and mutilate it. So it never functions properly for the rest of my life.
00:28:02
Speaker
And instead of saying, you know, We need to get you in some counseling for a while. We need to try and unpack some things in your past that might be leading to why you believe that. But instead, Chloe Cole said, it's like the doctors have an anorexic patient come in going, I am way too fat.
00:28:17
Speaker
This isn't working. And the doctor doesn't say, need some therapy. They say, you know what? You're right. You are. We need to get you some liposuction. And it's like, no, this criminal. And so it is, is. And so knowing that there are people out there who have detransitioned, who have believed that they were in a space that really wasn't the space that they're Compassion says,
00:28:44
Speaker
I have to believe that the person standing in front of me could very well be facing that same thing. So I can't jump into that delusion with them and just make them feel good about this decision that they're making. And then, like you said, and then adapt my whole world and everybody around me's whole world to pitch that delusion up.
00:29:04
Speaker
yeah And and with with this study that I've been doing and really understanding gender dysphoria, the part that that comes down to that I just ah hang on to every time is So the study on the and NIH, you know, very deep studies say about 10% of people who are presenting as a female suffer from gender dysphoria.
00:29:28
Speaker
That means the other 90% are autogynophiles. They are men who receive some sort of um excitement, intrigue. um They get enjoyment out of dressing up as a woman and being in spaces that women only are allowed and seeing that reaction. Not all of them filter through in all those ways, but that just means the vast majority of men, especially now, look at it. i mean, it's a group a lot of men are very aggressive
00:30:00
Speaker
about how they talk about how I deserve to be in your bathroom and whether you like it or I mean, just some of the disgusting things that we see online. And and it's just, it's like, how can you make every woman who has this natural innate sense of fear just subjecting that?
00:30:17
Speaker
Of men. Right. um subjugate that and say, oh, you you can be allowed in my restroom. And that's the thing that I keep coming back to. If the very small majority don't get this enjoyment out of it, that they're just suffering from gender dysphoria and they're trying to work it through, we can't allow the other 90% who are in that space because of more nefarious reasons that they may or may not recognize that That's just, you can't, you can't, it's, you can't have a gray area.
00:30:48
Speaker
You can't allow men into women's prisons and then start handing out condoms. That doesn't make sense. Zero sense.
00:30:55
Speaker
Zero sense. Because some of the men that go into women's prisons end up raping the women the inmates, which is insanity. Exactly. And impregnating them. The fact that women are getting pregnant in women's prisons. Now.
00:31:06
Speaker
Yeah. Somebody obviously just doesn't pick up on the fact that common sense would say that's because you keep men out of women's prisons. Yeah. And, that and it's, so it's just, we're, we're in this, this weird, very, very weird opposite world thing that it just, I can't believe I'm even having to use ah my voice to speak about this kind of stuff, but it is where we are and it's where God's called me to be. So that's why I'm here.
00:31:35
Speaker
It's one of the key civil rights issues of our time. Yeah, it is. yeah You know, Jen Say and Riley Gaines are like ah the Martin Luther King and Ralph Abernathy of our time.
00:31:49
Speaker
Right. And it's ah it's important, I think, for businessmen and businesswomen listening to this. We're wondering, well, what does that the heck does this have to do with me in business?
00:32:02
Speaker
I think your business has to have why to it. That's bigger than I want to make money. Yeah. Making money is very important. I love making money. I'm a big fan. I'm a capitalist through and through. Me too. But, um, uh, and, and, you know, professionally, what I do is I work with entrepreneurs and, and, and thought leaders, especially, and I help them get their thought leadership to a new level and make more money. I love it. I love what I do, but yeah,
00:32:28
Speaker
you gotta be standing for something. If you don't stand for something, you'll fall for anything. And your business needs to have a cause to it. Some sort of a cause that is intrinsic to who you are, not what you think the market's going to pat you on the head for, you know? So, um,
00:32:47
Speaker
and That's actually one of the things. Yeah. Oh, go ahead. or Go ahead. Go ahead. No, I was going to say about our business. And when I, when I really shifted our focus from doing what everybody else was doing, which was, you know, just trying to work with everybody in our community and really honing in on women, it's ah in the beginning, you know, from the entrepreneur side, it wasn't, it wasn't something that all the data points made sense. Yeah.
00:33:11
Speaker
yeah You know, a lot of the data points didn't make sense. But what the feedback that I was getting from the women that i was so I was talking to and that were coming in to these events and when I would speak and we would be meeting with them, I was hearing the same thing over and over and over again, that they just didn't feel they didn't feel welcome. Not that.
00:33:31
Speaker
The financial industry just speaks a masculine language. I mean, it's 75%, 80% are men. And so it's just natural that it goes that way. But a lot of these these women felt left out of the conversation.
00:33:43
Speaker
And so for me, it really became much more of a mission to be able to reach women who were not being reached by my industry. and And then how do you...
00:33:53
Speaker
you know, for lack of a better term, create disciples in other areas of the country of people who live in those areas that can also see women who are underserved, under marketed to. And yet they're the largest segment of the U S population, the greatest holders of wealth and in the United States in the next 10, 10 to 15 years are going to hold north of 60% of U S wealth because baby boomers are transferring, you know, $30 trillion dollars to them and 20% or 20, you know, two thirds of that, that 20 trillion is going to be going to women. Yeah.
00:34:22
Speaker
And yet, um a lot of people still don't see the value in it.
Empowerment and Rights
00:34:27
Speaker
And it's like, I want to help change the generational curses, I want to be able to help impact the next generation coming up. And so, as I've kind of sunsetted my financial career, my husband retired after 36 years in his career and, and, um you know, selling the business this year, i' finally have kind of said, Okay, I'm kind of done with the the training and the keynoting specifically on that topic, the financial topic, because I've been removed from it for a year and a half now, and it just doesn't feel congruent to where I'm going.
00:35:00
Speaker
sure But the mission is still the same. And, um you know, it's about, it it was always about having and I would teach on this, that it wasn't the presenter, wasn't it wasn't the person who was delivering the message.
00:35:17
Speaker
It was the safety that women feel like being in a learning environment with other women. And that was what made all the difference is women would come to our events because it said women only.
00:35:30
Speaker
And, you know, and i even got pushed back from people on that. It's like, how can you not let um you know her husband come to the event? And I said, because I have committed to all the other women that there won't be men in the room.
00:35:43
Speaker
Does that mean that I didn't have an occasional, um you know, self-identifying trans person in the room over, you know, 10 years? Yeah, a couple, there were a couple that that went in there. Um, but, uh, but it was really just honoring the space that I had agreed upon with all the other women that they weren't going to get sat next to somebody else's husband and then not be able to have any sort of communication because women are communal beings. They like to talk that way, but we're also, ah we're also told to be kind and, uh, accommodating and a lot of characteristics that
00:36:21
Speaker
that are the absolute reason that we are in this space. Because if men were retreat or were dealing with the exact same thing that we're, as women, that we're dealing with, this thing would have been snuffed out in an instant.
00:36:33
Speaker
But women are told to be accommodating. They're told to be, um you know, nice and demure and don't speak up and don't sound like your bitch and don't, you know, be overbearing and, you know, all these kinds of things. And these are natural tendencies that make us great moms and, you know, compassionate friends and, you know, a wonderful spouse. Yeah.
00:36:52
Speaker
But when you're in the battle, those things can work against you. And that's what we're seeing as a lot of women are really struggling at using their voice because they've been told throughout their life or they've just lived that way that I don't want to make waves. I don't want to be seen as this horrible, bad person.
00:37:10
Speaker
And yet um when I lay my head down on my pillow at night, I feel so much better having had and continuing to have the negativity. You know, it always hurts when it comes from people you actually know, but having the negativity because all of the other side of the women and the girls that aren't able to speak up aren't willing. They're not at that space yet. They're too young to do it.
00:37:36
Speaker
That then at least I'm doing what God has called me to do. And so I guess I'm always, I've kind of always been in this space of mission, whether it was a hurt wildlife this that ended up turning into working with women and now really being able to help further this fight and this battle and ultimately win it worldwide. It has to be worldwide. We can't have the Olympic commission allowing men into into women's sports. So this is definitely something that is going to require a fight for some time and I'm here for it.
00:38:10
Speaker
Amen. and Well, God bless you for doing it. um I think a lot more men and fathers need to step up and stand up for young girls and young women that are being treated in such an abominable way.
00:38:25
Speaker
um This means barring the door. If a man's trying to go into your daughter's change room or washroom, this means um speaking up.
00:38:37
Speaker
This means ah spending money at to companies like XXXY. This means calling your legislators and making sure that they're seeing things your way. And if they're not fighting to get them out of there. right And this means speaking up.
00:38:55
Speaker
ah Men of the warriors of society and then start fighting and start standing up for their women. That's our job. Yeah, 100%. I totally agree. It's our freaking job. Yeah. Did you see that? that sounds I've got sons. don't have daughters. yeah I'm telling you, if I daughters, this shit wouldn't be going down. I'd be going to jail. i don't have a problem with that. We'll go to jail. Did you see that? um I'm not exactly sure where it was, but it was, it looked, the the the gentlemen looked like they were maybe Samoan or something, and they were doing a fight against a pride parade.
00:39:29
Speaker
And they were all coming together. Yeah, yeah, the Haka dance dudes, man. That was awesome. Oh, awesome. Actually, but what my my ah middle son is living in New Zealand right now. Makes me proud.
00:39:42
Speaker
But yeah, that's right what I saw. I just just like what you just said. It's that I mean, the but the Bible talks about a woman being the weaker vessel. And as a girl who was always a tomboy, always had a bunch of guy friends, loved competing and playing with the boys, so to speak.
00:40:02
Speaker
I knew from a very young age that there was a limitation on what I could do from the time I was in seventh grade, as these boys were barely even into puberty. i I, I was hitting that point where I couldn't, I couldn't beat them.
00:40:15
Speaker
and Yet, I don't take that as a bad thing. Because again, when you're when you're rooted in, i have been created, God created me with a purpose. And I know part of that purpose is walking out this beautiful vessel of being a woman and having those feminine qualities and having the weaker body, physical weaker body that needs a man to be able to come around and help her up sometimes and encourage her and be that protector mean to stand, you know, those moments where my husband has really needed to stand in that space and say, Hey, I will take all the bullets for you. I will do whatever is necessary. That as a woman is so intoxicating.
00:41:00
Speaker
And yet a lot of women who think they're feminist things, I don't need a man. And it's like, it was just as, it's this beautiful, ah this dance that was just, it was all created to, to, to, to work together.
00:41:13
Speaker
And um i fully agree with you. Dad's being able to be that space. I didn't have, you know, functioning dad in the home that, you know, told me that I was beautiful, that I was loved. And both my sister and I, you know, we, we bear some of the, those scars from our childhood of not having that mind went into good things, you know, overachieving, And my sister, you know we you know, she was struggling with not being in that stuff, but was always trying to fill the void.
00:41:42
Speaker
And the void really comes from having a strong man, whether that's a dad who just really loves you. Riley talks about how how incredible her parents are and it's obvious. yeah It's obvious when you hear her speak that she not only is rooted in just a family unit that just believes in God, but that they told her how capable she was.
00:42:01
Speaker
But they also gave her the foundational principles that in one day you're going to find a man that's going to be a great compliment to this powerful woman that you are, but you still you so need you need a partner.
00:42:14
Speaker
And so dad's, that's a huge part of it. It is a huge part of this fight. It really is. Amen. Amen.
Arwen's Platforms & Advice
00:42:22
Speaker
So, um, Arwen, if people want to find out more about what you're up to, where do we send them?
00:42:29
Speaker
Well, I do most of my posting through my Instagram account. So Arwen Becker, A-R-W-E-N, it comes out of Lord of the Rings. My dad was a bit of a hippie in the seventies. So that's what it comes out of.
00:42:41
Speaker
oh So Arwen Becker is my main account. um I also post to YouTube. but There's a lot of my endurance races. I kind of do these mini documentaries there and that's under my life, L-I-F-E, life with Arwen account.
00:42:54
Speaker
um And then arwoodbecker.com. That's my website. That's where what I interviewed a lot of women in 20 and 21 how they overcame major adversity and what they learned through it. So that's where my podcast is still actually on Apple and all all main platforms as well, but you can find those there. And All of my media interviews, all the things that I've done throughout my career, a number of that can be found there. And then I've got two books. I have um She Handled It, So Can You. And then I have She Handled It, Retirement, which is an inspiring and empowering financial book for women over the age of 40. Because retirement planning really does start in your 40s, not when you're 60. Don't wait till then. I've seen that.
00:43:41
Speaker
Yeah. I love it. I love it. Okay, so we end each episode by asking you as our guest expert to give us your top three expert action steps. These are your best pieces of advice in bullet point form to help my listener take his or her life to another level. What say you?
00:43:59
Speaker
First one, I would say the compound effect. If you haven't read that book by Darren Hardy, he also has a journal that goes along with it. is absolutely awesome. And it's ah it's a quick read.
00:44:10
Speaker
Compound effect is based on very simple principle. It's the small things over time add up to make the big results. And that is in everything. And so just being willing to do the daily actions, are going to really daily actions of, you know, at anything that you're trying to improve, um those are things are going to add up over time and really make the big difference. So that would be number one.
00:44:32
Speaker
um Number two, ah you have to run the miles, you have to do the work, nobody can do it for you. um Don't sit around expecting somebody to do it for you. ah you have to work on your schedule, get up early.
00:44:45
Speaker
and um start your day off doing those things that really matter before life starts dictating what you're going to be doing with your day. So I i used to, you know, very religiously get up um between 430 and five. Now I sleep in a little bit more, but um really starting your day off and knowing what your three top priorities of the day are going to be. So run the miles, do the work. And then number three, i would say is something I learned with my endurance hiking.
00:45:13
Speaker
ah This was it took me a long time to to really realize this and endurance hiking when you're doing 30 hours of hiking middle of the night alone, things like that, you learn this, you need to be present where your feet are planted.
Conclusion and Call to Action
00:45:26
Speaker
You can't rush the process. And worse yet, when we are achieving a goal, and we're in the pursuit of a goal, if all we're focused on is the goal, and not the journey, we get to the goal, and it's very fleeting.
00:45:42
Speaker
You have momentary joy, but it's over. And so being able to enjoy the journey along the way, and look up and see what's going on and the suffering, all the the components that come with really striving for something, just knowing that you're exactly where you're supposed to be at that point and fighting to enjoy it along the way, because the journey is way longer than that little goal that is your destination. Those are three awesome expert action steps.
00:46:16
Speaker
Arwen, thank you so much for coming on the show, sharing your story and sharing your courage and your your wisdom with us. Thank you so much for having me. I really appreciate it.
00:46:27
Speaker
You bet. Listener, Arwen Becker is the real deal. Go check out her website, her IG page, her YouTube page. And... If you agree with us that it's time to stand up for what's right, which means stand up for girls, stand up for women, then do me a favor and share this episode with someone who needs to hear its message.
00:46:54
Speaker
And if you know someone that's dealing with the pressure of the dark forces in our society,
00:47:05
Speaker
and being told that if they don't conform to what's wrong and pretend that a man is a woman, they're gonna face severe consequences. Share this episode with them to give them some hope because a little spark of hope can turn into a roaring fire and give these young girls what they need to stand tall and stand strong and come out on the other side better than they were before it.
00:47:35
Speaker
Make sure you do that. Until next time, goodbye.
00:47:43
Speaker
This episode has been brought to you by ecircleacademy.com, the proven system to add six to seven figures a year to your thought leader practice.