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Discover the Power of Personal Style with Tannya Bernadette | The Closet Edit Podcast
5 Plays8 months ago
In this episode of The Closet Edit Podcast, we sit down with Tannya Bernadette, a seasoned personal stylist and the Founder of The Closet Edit. Tannya shares her personal journey of overcoming obstacles and challenges, from navigating motherhood to leaving an emotionally abusive relationship. Discover how she pivoted her career during COVID and found strength through style.
With over 15 years of experience, Tannya brings a unique perspective to personal styling, emphasizing the connection between style and self-expression. Learn how shopping with intention can transform your life and why it's essential to follow your intuition when it comes to fashion choices.
Tannya shares her favorite hobbies, from salsa dancing to baking, and offers valuable life advice for listeners. Tune in to explore the concept of "Finding my best self, the woman beyond the cape," and discover how embracing your unique style can lead to personal empowerment and fulfillment.
Don't miss this inspiring conversation with Tannya Bernadette, where she reveals the secrets to unlocking your best self through the transformative power of personal style.
Follow or get in touch with Tannya:
· Be You Brand Podcast - Elevate your Style and Confidence with Tannya Bernadette
· Cultivating Wellness Media - How Styling Your Wardrobe Can Influence Your Mindset and Boost Your Confidence
· What you didn’t know about being a Personal Stylist
· New Styles Don’t Work for Me. What Should I do?
contact@tannyab.com
And as always, remember:
YOU ARE STRONG.
YOU ARE CAPABLE.
YOU ARE WORTHY.
I love you and I’m ENDLESSLY rooting for you!
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Transcript
Authenticity in Personal Style
00:00:00
Speaker
I feel like finding your best self is finding people, things, surrounding yourself with everybody and the things that make you feel like you. When you feel like you're trying to put up a persona and it feels so out of touch with who you are, it creates anxiety. I mean, I've been through that in my life, even trying that part of myself that I had to hide for so long. It creates so much anxiety that you can't do the things that bring you joy and that
00:00:28
Speaker
you know, that just like let you shine. So I think that is what is finding your best self, surrounding yourself with people and things that help you feel more like you.
00:00:40
Speaker
Hey girl, welcome to Finding My Best Self, the podcast where it's totally okay to show up in your leggings and messy bun, because let's be real, that's our uniform here. The only rule is to be unapologetically yourself. And I'm Mandi, and joining me is Pam, the queen of Finding the Silver Linings. We're here to share laughs, tears, and everything in between.
00:00:59
Speaker
Think of us as your new best friends with some stories to tell and wisdom to share. From face palms to victories, we're diving into the journey of self-discovery, wellness, and what it means to truly embrace who you are. So whether you're conquering the world or just trying to find your phone in the black hole, I mean, purse, we've got you covered.
00:01:17
Speaker
Because here it's all about encouraging you to lace up those sneakers or don't, we're not judging. And join us as we explore what is truly means to own your confidence and find your best self. So pour yourself a cup of coffee or a glass of wine and let's get into it.
00:01:35
Speaker
Hello and welcome back to another episode of Finding My Best Self.
Introduction to Tanya and The Closet Edit
00:01:39
Speaker
Mandy and I are so excited today because we have a podcast that's very different than what we've done before. Today we have with us Tanya, and she is a wife and a mama. She is the founder of The Closet Edit, which is a personal styling company that empowers others to find their style to make the process more efficient, easy, and rewarding.
00:01:59
Speaker
She's also the host of a podcast called The Closet Edit, and she will soon be publishing a book called Make It You. So, Tanya, thank you so much for joining us today. We are very, very intrigued by The Closet Edit. Can you tell us a little bit more about the company and exactly what you do? Of course. I actually started this 15 years ago, and every time I have to share this story, it still shocks me that I've been doing it that long.
00:02:28
Speaker
right out of graduating college. And I started it because I'm in Seattle, Washington, and now I work with people everywhere. But back then, there wasn't a lot of assistance and help when it comes to personal shopping. And Rachel Zoe, I'm not sure if you've heard of her, but she really made it accessible for people. She had people talking about it. And I knew that as somebody that enjoyed fashion and someone that was a good listener, because personal styling is also being very
00:02:57
Speaker
like in tune with the person that you're working with. You have to listen to all their needs and put it together and create something for them that feels like them. And I started my business out of this desire to really connect with women, especially, and help them really feel their best in everything they're wearing, especially because we're all so busy. And the ultimate goal, yes, you need help as you go through transitions in your life, but the ultimate goal for everybody is really to just feel good, feel good in your body, feel good in where you're at in
Impact of Life Changes on Style
00:03:25
Speaker
your life. And that's what we do with my company.
00:03:27
Speaker
Yeah, that's at the end of the day. That is part of the reason why we wanted you here is because that is what we encourage women obviously more so on the fitness side, right? But it's all at the end of the day. It's all about just feeling good in your own skin and who you are, whether no matter what it is that you're wearing. So I love what you're doing and the whole idea behind it. Yeah. And when it comes to like,
00:03:54
Speaker
working out and stuff. We work with people going through transitions in their life. I like to say that people don't come to us to say, hey, I just need two outfits. Of course, after we've created a relationship, you can do that. But initially, first time clients that come to us start realizing that they feel disconnected from what they're wearing. So they either have gained a lot of weight, they have lost a lot of weight, they can't see who who they are in their body anymore. People that are going back into the workforce after having children. I mean, you go through a
00:04:24
Speaker
pregnancy and then going through breastfeeding if you breastfeed or even that first year after the baby's born that when you go back to shop, you're like everything has changed.
Intentional Shopping and Personal Style
00:04:33
Speaker
Life has changed and I have to what am I going to do? I also work with a lot of people that are dating again. That's a huge topic of like, I got divorced or now I'm taking dating seriously. I haven't had good relationships. Maybe it's me. Maybe I need to work on myself. So
00:04:50
Speaker
There are so many reasons that people come to us, but it's usually something bigger than I just need help shopping. Right. Yeah, I completely get that because I think I mean, I mean, not a lot of us can attest to that, that things that even used to work for us five years ago are still not things that work now or our body type have changed or things like that. And so just being able to
00:05:19
Speaker
I mean, I said it earlier, like, as far as our kids, you know, we're constantly putting effort into our kids to figure out what they need to wear, what they need in our spouses or partners. And so whenever it comes to us, it's like we just throw on the same thing. And I know that there's pieces in my closet that I've probably had for 10 years that I just need to kind of throw out because it's just it's not doing me any justice. And it's definitely not the pieces that I normally go to to feel good. So.
00:05:47
Speaker
Yeah, and who you were 10 years ago is who you're different. I mean, like now you're different than who you were back then. Oh, yeah. When you wear those pieces, it's like stepping into you 10 years ago. And that could be good. You know, there are some things that you can bring back and wear again. But when you aren't feeling like you're stepping into your best self right now,
00:06:07
Speaker
as a woman you are, it doesn't make sense to wear those pieces. And that's why they start hiding in the back and you don't even pull them out anymore. Cause there's items that you like put on and then like, eh, maybe not today. And you take it off and put something else on. So those are pieces that you know, you either have to get rid of or find a new way to wear them. I like to tell people that too. Um, cause sometimes people do have favorites that they've had in their closet for a long time. And an easy way to update it is buy a new style and put it together.
00:06:36
Speaker
it's going to feel like something fresh. I love that. I know for me personally, shopping is just very intimidating because I walk into a store, unless I'm walking in with something very, very specific, like I'm walking in and I want a pair of shorts. And again, let me get more specific, like I am looking for
00:06:59
Speaker
a pair of shorts that are high waisted or whatever, then I can go in and kind of narrow it down. But if I have like an event to go to, or, you know, if I'm wanting to just maybe freshen up my wardrobe or whatever the case may be, it's really intimidating because I go into the store and it's so much. And it's, you know, I tried to piece together the
00:07:20
Speaker
things that I see, right? Whether it's on Pinterest or social media or whatever. And I put them on and either A, I look at myself and I'm like, this doesn't look good on me or it doesn't fit my body type. Or B, I put it on. I'm like, this doesn't even match. You know? So like I was telling you guys before the call, I'm really big on going when I shop in store, because it's not often. I am very much an online person. I go in the stores that
00:07:49
Speaker
there's two stores specifically locally that I go to and the girls know me there and they, they, you know, they help me and I walk in and I tell them what I need or where I'm going and they're, you know, these are the things you need. Go try them on. And I'm like, okay. And that's great for me. So that's very much what you do just in a virtual sense, which is really cool because who doesn't want to do everything virtually today?
Mindful Shopping and Style Exploration
00:08:13
Speaker
Yeah. And the hard thing too, when you're seeing,
00:08:16
Speaker
Pinterest and Instagram make it everything looks so easy I mean there is a lot of posing like you can pose in certain ways with certain items that make it look better than they actually look another thing is that when you're
00:08:31
Speaker
I do believe that you can find things that are inspiring to you, but sometimes there's a bigger picture to it that is important to you. So maybe looking at these pieces and being like, what is it that I actually like about these outfits or this person I'm following on Instagram? Is it the fact that she looks very classic? Do her pieces look really fun that I'm attracted to? And using these describing words to find something that works for you because not everything that somebody puts together
00:08:59
Speaker
is going to work for you, which is why the book I'm writing is called Make It You. Because you can take little bits and parts of things that you see and recreate it for yourself. Because it's not like a cookie cutter type thing. One thing that works for one person isn't going to work for another. Oh, like the one size fits all pieces. I'm like, no, it is not. Some of us do not. Yeah. Yeah.
00:09:26
Speaker
So you mentioned shopping being intentional when you're shopping. And for me personally, when I think of the word intentional, everything else but shopping comes to mind, right? It is being intentional in my faith, being intentional with my family, being intentional with my health, being intentional, you know, cooking, whatever the case may be. I am intentional in every other way. And I don't, I've never associated that word with shopping. So can you go a little bit deeper on that? And exactly for you, what,
00:09:56
Speaker
When you're talking to your customers, being intentional on shopping, what does that mean? I love being intentional with shopping, not just for my customers, but with myself. It really gives you a direction that you're taking when you are shopping for
Balancing Professional and Casual Wardrobes
00:10:11
Speaker
yourself, because I'm sure you've been in that place where you're like, you know what? Today I don't have the kids or have an hour and a half to myself. I'm going to go to the mall and see what, what I can find, or even online.
00:10:21
Speaker
and you start scrolling and scrolling and adding things to your cart that are on sale or look cute. And then in the end you have this cart full of things that you're like, where am I? Okay. One, where am I going to wear this to? Two, do I actually like this? And three,
00:10:37
Speaker
The price is like $15, so maybe it's worth it. So what happens when you are not shopping intentionally is you just start adding things to your closet and your closet starts growing and growing and you're not even wearing these pieces that you're buying or you're really confused on how to wear them.
00:10:54
Speaker
Then you start getting mixed up on what your style is because it feels all over the place. So there's so many things that come from not shopping intentionally. And those little $15 pieces end up adding up. I go into people's closets because I do this virtually and in person. When you go into somebody's closet virtually or in person and you start eliminating these pieces, I've gone up to like in my lead stylist and I went to one client that we got rid of like six bags of stuff.
00:11:22
Speaker
within only three hours because she was just shopping without intention. She didn't have a goal in mind of how she wanted to look and feel. That's number one. You want to make sure that you have a style statement for yourself. How do you want to look at filling your clothing? If you are trying something home that does not align with that, it has to go. Don't take it. Take it out of your closet and don't buy it online or in the store. Another thing is, you know what?
00:11:51
Speaker
You mentioned shopping for like a very specific thing.
00:11:54
Speaker
Intentional shopping is having a shopping list, but it doesn't necessarily need to be so specific because what happens is you have this one thing in mind. You're like, I need the perfect v-neck cardigan with three buttons on it, you know, like whatever it is. And then you go to the store and you're there for three hours and you're like, I came up with nothing because you had this very specific thing in mind. So I do talk about making a shopping list, maybe make it a cardigan rather than
00:12:24
Speaker
something like perfect and precise of what you need because then it gives you the option to explore. What happens is that we get so comfortable in what we know, what has worked for us in the past, what our body type is, you know, the styles that we've tried on and we're like in our closet, I have five of these shirts and I know they work and this is my style. So what happens is you'll be attracted to that next time you go in. So it's good to expand and explore.
00:12:54
Speaker
So when you're intentional, it is having your shopping list of like, I like people to focus when they're shopping by themselves to the three items and having that style statement for yourself so you know what you want to buy and look for. I feel like you totally just called me out like really bad. I mean, I was just about to say that.
00:13:16
Speaker
I swear that's just what I was about to say. Yes. And not just for us. And so at the end of the day, though, I also know that it's not just for us, you'd it's just every woman who was listening to this podcast is not laughing like are you here in my life? Are you watching me right now? You've been watching me on camera like you know, doing you've checked my closet already.
00:13:37
Speaker
I'm the shopper where it's a hodgepodge of everything. It's like I want everyone's style, but I have no idea what my own is at all. And especially when you become a mom, what happens with a lot of my clients that have children is
00:13:53
Speaker
what ends up happening when you go shopping is, okay, I'm at Old Navy shopping for my kid, or I'm at TJ Maxx shopping for my kid. And then you pick up like a ton of random stuff because you're like, it was only like $10, pair of sandals, some shorts, a jacket, but you don't wear these pieces or maybe you wore it once and you're like, you know what, this actually wasn't really that comfortable. It didn't fit right. Like I was there and I bought it because you feel like you need something and you know, you need to shop for yourself.
00:14:20
Speaker
but you aren't being intentional in buying the right things for yourself. You're just picking things up to sort of like check it off and be like, you know, I bought myself something today. So maybe my closet will feel better tomorrow, but it's not intentional.
00:14:32
Speaker
I go back to how Pam was saying how she'll go in for specific things. I feel like I can think back even whenever I first had a job and I wanted to go shopping. I just look at the mannequin at the store and say, okay, I'll take her. I'll take the mannequin's outfit. It's gotten to the point to where if I purchase things for a specific event after I wear it, it's like,
00:14:54
Speaker
I can't wear that again. Like I wore that for this or for that. And then now I just have all these outfits that aren't really versatile to where you can like mix and match with other pieces. Like I know for sure I have a pair of hot pink pants in my closet that don't really, like it's just a weird fabric and all of that. I'm like, I'm never going to wear those again. So I think it's that too, like being intentional and getting pieces that you can reuse for other outfits, correct?
00:15:24
Speaker
Yes. And yes, being intentional is making sure that your pieces mix and match well together. Like in less, and here's a, here's a different case though. Like you mentioned special events. Unfortunately, special events, you don't often get to wear those pieces again, or if you do, it takes a few months for you to take it out again and wear it. But for everyday pieces that you are purchasing for yourself, you want to make sure that you can mix and match it at least three different ways in your closet.
00:15:53
Speaker
or else it's going to be that purchase that you regret. And you're like, gosh, why did that? You know what? It's funny how us women, we regret spending $500, but we also regret spending $20 on something. So it's like, gosh, I spent the $20 on that. And I'm not even going to wear it.
Tanya's Personal Journey in Style
00:16:08
Speaker
Like I don't even know how to wear it. So making sure that you do have a few different ways of wearing it. What I even do for my, and I'm a stylist, but I, the way that I work with my clients, I also work with myself. So when I buy something new that I'm really excited about,
00:16:22
Speaker
I actually go to my closet, make three outfits with it, take pictures of it. And then next time I wall wear, I'm like, Oh, I have three different ways to wear it. And then you don't have to think. So it makes a huge difference. Man. I know personally for me, that's something that's really big because I do work from home. I also work out a lot. And then, but at the same time, I also have a mortgage lending job as well. So I'll have to have.
00:16:49
Speaker
you know, some professional clothes as well. So it's really nice for me to have pieces that I can wear on the weekends or wear whatever any other day, but then I can also dress them up as well. And I know probably a lot of ladies struggle with that too.
00:17:06
Speaker
having the pieces that are everyday pieces but you can also dress them up too if need be so that way it's not having a whole this is and I understand too that there are the pieces that may just be like this is just for work or just for whatever but it's really nice to have just all those you know a whole section of just pieces that are versatile they can go either way whether it's dress down or dress up. Yeah I'd say the majority of our clients
00:17:32
Speaker
they do have that lifestyle where you can literally dress something up and down. Like you could wear jeans and heels if you wanted to go out in a top or you could do the jeans and the t-shirt and the sneakers during the daytime. Yeah. But for some industries, like even for myself, if you go on my personal Instagram, I'm a mom.
00:17:51
Speaker
And I, and I'm a stylist, I actually love dressing up.
Versatile Activewear Launch
00:17:55
Speaker
Like for me, it's an art. I love, I love fashion. I love dressing up. But when I'm with my kids, if you look at my Instagram, I feel really put together, but it is a lot more casual. So there are lifestyles like mine where it's like, I do have my, this is my casual weekend where with the kids, really cute, but not anything I would ever wear to work. And then I have my work where that I feel really powerful in. Like I feel like I step into being a stylist.
00:18:19
Speaker
and working mom when I'm in those outfits. So, but yeah, the majority of people they do have, I like to call a blur in fashion where it's like, you could dress it up or dress it down depending on what you do with it. Yeah, for sure.
00:18:36
Speaker
This episode is brought to you by MBS Fitco. Excitement is in the air at MBS Fitco as we prepare for our upcoming launch. We're introducing a line of premium activewear designed to seamlessly fit into both your workout routines and daily life. Our versatile collection is perfect for your workouts and equally suited for your day-to-day tasks, ensuring you look and feel your best, no matter the occasion.
00:18:58
Speaker
It's not just clothing. It's a commitment to self-care and embracing your best self. Be the first to experience the fusion of style, comfort, and functionality.
Balancing Career, Family, and Self-Care
00:19:07
Speaker
Subscribe to our VIP list and follow us on Facebook, Instagram, and TikTok for insider information and exclusive perks available only on our launch day. Dive into the show notes for all the links you need.
00:19:17
Speaker
MBS Fitco isn't more than just activewear, it's a lifestyle. Join our community and be part of our exciting journey from day one to celebrate fitness, self-care and your hero within. Don't just wear it, live it. All right, now let's dive back into this episode. Well, I know
00:19:39
Speaker
You mentioned being a mom and juggling like a busy career. So what's your best piece of advice on how to like keep up with the daily ins and out and finding time for yourself for self care or even those snippets to even, you know, I just did your style quiz on, on your Instagram. And so I was literally dropping my girls off at dance, like scrolling and looking through it. So.
00:20:04
Speaker
How do you kind of juggle all of that and make time for yourself in those moments? You know what? Every day is totally different. Both being a mom and entrepreneur. You know, being a business woman has helped me a lot with being a mom because every day is different. You never know what's going to happen. You constantly have to pivot and being a mom is exactly that. Like you think you have a whole day ahead of you and then the kid gets sick
00:20:33
Speaker
and you have to cancel everything you had going on for work and be with a sick kid, you know, coughing in your face the whole day. So I don't feel like there is an exact formula. I do have to say that for myself and everybody is different, but for myself, I do enjoy working. I work a lot of hours. I do have somebody that takes care of the kids so that I can work during the day. My husband also does have a regular nine to five job, so it's very easy for him to help
00:21:02
Speaker
around the house and with the kids. And he is very helpful with that. So that allows space for me. Because when the kids are at daycare, I have time to work out. I try to work out at least three to four days a week.
00:21:17
Speaker
that's super important to me. It just, it keeps me energized. It gets me ready for the day. It makes my mind feel clear. And at the same time, when I work out, I get so many ideas. So looking out for me personally has a lot of benefits and
00:21:34
Speaker
Yeah, I feel like there is no exact answer because it's constantly just figuring out like, who's going to, you know, you have to like schedule the husband, who's going to pick the kids up. Okay. I have to work late. Like today, I actually have to work till 8 PM, which is not normal for my schedule, but I had a long day and he has to help with the kids and get them ready for bed.
Community and Communication in Life Management
00:21:53
Speaker
So every day is really different. And I think just having a good, if you have a partner, having that good team player with you that supports you, and I have been a single mom too, so I've,
00:22:04
Speaker
I've done it by myself as well. And that was a difference or it was like a lot of calling family. Hey, can you pick her up today? I have to work late, you know, but I think having that community with you is really helpful. You do not have to do.
00:22:16
Speaker
Anything in life alone, whether it's taking care of the kids, business stuff, having people help you within your business, having help somebody working out with you and stuff. I think community is very important in making things work. I agree. I think it's community and communication too.
00:22:35
Speaker
Um, the communication piece is so, so big, especially for people who have, well, I say that, but I was gonna say people who have, um, a significant other or spouse, but at the same time, if you're single as the communication piece with other people who are stepping in to help you, whoever that person is, and just having that, that open communication and just making sure everyone's on the same page and not even just with them, but with the kids too. And so that way they understand, you know, I know I can have the talk with my children on the way home. I was like, I'm.
00:23:04
Speaker
doing a podcast interview today. I'm going to do y'all to give me some time and everybody be quiet. Y'all saw how that went before we started. Well, and it's interesting cause Pam does that too. Like when she's working out, you'll get voice memos like, Hey, what about this? What about that? And it is, I feel like that's, that's our time to kind of.
00:23:26
Speaker
I don't know, be in our own space and actually think and do the things that we want to do so that it's very important even with a crazy busy schedule. Yeah. I really do try to get my workout in and I just switched to a new gym and I love it because I feel like it's more peaceful than the gym I was at. And I try working out from home and I have a room where I like to work out in.
00:23:50
Speaker
But when I go into that room and the kids are here, they're like, it happened the other day. I was like, you know what, maybe just doing the like at home workout. No, the kids are climbing all over me. I'm like talking to them. They're asking me questions. I'm like, this is not a workout. Yeah. Like, yeah. Yeah. So that's for me. Like peaceful places are very important. This new gym I have is like so much more peaceful, not as loud, not crazy like the other ones. So.
00:24:19
Speaker
It makes a difference. Hear my ideas and, you know, just being on the treadmill and just answering text messages and stuff. And just the time, just the step away to as a mom, we all need that. Yes. So you mentioned trying, just trying new things and you know, for people to just try new things.
00:24:44
Speaker
I know for a lot of people that's really hard just trying something new. It makes them uncomfortable or just a mental block or a struggle of trying new. Like I said before that I went to an event recently and I went to one of the local boutiques and she told me to put a specific outfit on and I looked at it like,
00:25:07
Speaker
I would have never pulled that off the rack for
Defining Style and Body Confidence
00:25:10
Speaker
myself. And I looked at it and I was like, okay, you know, and I put it on and I walked out and I was like, this actually really looks good on me. And so it's just being open to, but I know for a lot of people that's really, really hard. So what's your advice on, I guess, getting over those, those struggles or fears of just trying new things? It usually is us in our own head. I feel like with style,
00:25:38
Speaker
I've done a podcast episode on this, but we have lost the joy sometimes in getting dressed. Like we're like so strict on like, I need to be safe and get the capsule wardrobe and make sure this goes with this. Like we forget the fun and joy of it, what it is to actually dress up and be a girl or a woman. We're not girls as women that when you try something on that is different. And I told this with my clients, some clients need more coaching than others. Some clients try something on and immediately
00:26:08
Speaker
You could just tell their eyes are like sparked with joy and excitement of this new piece. And for some people they try things on and you could tell they're uncomfortable. You could tell it's like very new. And as a stylist, we do have to help you get out of that. And I just let them know, like this happened the other day when I was with the client, she was trying on these wide leg jeans. And at first she looked at, she's like, no, I'm like outside perspective.
00:26:32
Speaker
This looks really good on you. You could wear this when you're teaching. You could wear this to go out with heels. You could wear this with this beautiful blouse that you have in your closet. I was like, let's keep it on for a little bit. Let's try on some tops. Keep the pants on. Within 30 minutes of trying on different tops and jackets, not to match the pants, but things that she needed that were on our list. She kept looking at herself and her butt and she's like, you know what? I really like these pants. Like they grew on me. And I'm like, yeah, it was just very different than
00:27:02
Speaker
a skinny jean that you've been wearing, they actually look good, they're comfortable, and you could wear them so many different ways. And by the end of it, she took the pants because she felt so good in it. So being uncomfortable is, yeah.
00:27:18
Speaker
It is scary because you question yourself so much and there's roadblocks of like, oh my gosh, am I gonna wear this? Does this make my butt look big? Do my boobs look weird? And it's like, there's so many things that go in our head, but we are judging ourselves so much that we have to get out of our head. And sometimes like telling clients like, just wear the damn dress.
00:27:38
Speaker
And when you wear it, you get so many compliments and everything that you thought looked fat and you bulging in it, no one sees it. So we get so stuck in our heads sometimes when things actually do look really good. That's so true. Self, self critical. And it's, we pick and we pick a lot more than anybody else sees, you know,
00:28:04
Speaker
It's so much more. So I have a personal question. This was not on our list of questions, but I guess I just want to kind of bring this around to the whole trying something new and just your whole the closet edit in general. So when you style, is it specific to trying to help someone find their style or is it also specific to body type? Because I think for me personally, that is where I struggle the most is that
00:28:29
Speaker
I can put things together and I think that I have somewhat of a little bit of a style or you know, but I see pictures of myself and again, maybe this is just me picking on myself. I see pictures of me a lot and I feel like the things that I choose
00:28:45
Speaker
make me look a lot bigger than what I am. And I say this specifically because there is someone that I know that has a very similar body type that I do. And she wears different types of clothes that I don't wear. And when I see pictures of her, I'm like, wow, she looks really great. And she almost, I mean, she looks like, and not that she's big by any means, because she's my size, right? But she,
00:29:14
Speaker
she looks like she's literally half that size because she is dressing for her body type. And so that's where I struggle at most. So is that something that you do as well in helping people or is it just more so finding your own personal style? So we do talk about body type and I do have to say that is just a small percentage of personal style. I feel like personal style has to do with your personality.
Dressing for Body Type and Proportions
00:29:39
Speaker
It has to do with what you like to do, what your lifestyle is like.
00:29:44
Speaker
and it does have to do with body. So body type is an important part, but also the structure of how body types are created with clothing is something that is a bit more dated. So I feel like body type has a lot more to do with what you feel good about your body and what you don't feel good about your body. So it is meant to be there.
00:30:08
Speaker
to be like, Oh, you don't feel good about your midsection. This is what you need to do. So when I work with people is getting to see where they're at with that because some clients, I have plus size clients that they will wear something tight fitted and they look and feel so good and they pull it off and they have so much confidence in it.
00:30:27
Speaker
where I have a petite client that feels like her tummy is bulging, and she feels so uncomfortable wearing something fitted. So we need to do like the layered look. So yes, body type is very important. But again, with every person, it's slightly different. And it's not just their bodies, how they actually feel about what they look. So maybe the things that you're wearing, maybe you're wearing things that in the mirror, they feel like, oh, they look really good. But maybe there's more you can do to show your body that will help you feel like you're slimmer in clothing.
00:30:58
Speaker
So that makes a lot of sense. When you say it that way, that makes, that makes a lot of sense. So again, it's, it's just through my own personal lens. And so it's not necessarily that the things may look bad on me or may make me look bigger. It's just my own personal lens and personal style and what I feel comfortable in. Yeah. And something that goes into, obviously I don't know the outfit that you were saying that you're talking about this other person that looks similar to you, but proportions are important too.
00:31:28
Speaker
So it's hard to go into depth of that on the podcast because it's so visual. But for example, if you are bigger on top and you have bigger boobs, having something more fitted and then a wide like pant evens it out, it looks really nice. Whereas if you did like tight head to toe with everything, it like shows a lot. And these are just general. These are just like general roles. It's not something that, you know, it looks the same with everybody. But the proportions of the clothing that you're wearing
00:31:57
Speaker
make a huge difference too on how things look and also how you style things. So if you do have something that has some extra fabric on it, you can add a belt where you can put a jacket over it or you can tuck it in. Like there's different things that you can do with a piece of clothing and how you style it that will change how it looks on you. And obviously with style, you don't want to over complicate things because the point is you don't want to make it work for you. You just want to be able to like throw it on and be like, you know what, I feel good and I look good.
00:32:27
Speaker
So making sure that you buy the right pieces that make that easier for you is really important. If you have, and I told this to clients too, sometimes they have like this green, beautiful, lacy exquisite top in their closet, like show me how to wear it. And I'm like, we don't have anything to put together to it. Why have you been holding out that for five years? I love this beautiful top. And it's like, you can't make something work for you that doesn't. And they're like, well, maybe if I like do this and I'm like, you're not going to wear it. It's that much work.
00:32:56
Speaker
And you've probably experienced that too. If there's a top that has like crazy ties and stuff, you're like, take it off. You're like, I'm never going to wear this. You know? So just finding things that are easy for you, that feel good are really important. And when you work on your personal style, I think it's really important that you, I don't like to call it a capsule wardrobe because that feels like, like you're in a box. Like you can't grow from there. I like to say like we create a foundation to your wardrobe that you can work from.
00:33:23
Speaker
And once you have a good foundation, it does make it easier to add a few pieces here and there because you feel like everything mixes and matches well together. But if you don't have a good foundation, it is really hard to do that. You're going to feel like there's a lot missing when you're trying to create outfits.
Personal Style and External Influences
00:33:41
Speaker
Yeah, I've always felt like I was a follower shopper because my sister growing up always had the style. And so it was, it's funny. It's actually a joke between us that like six months later, I'll start wearing what she was wearing. Cause I look at it and like, Oh, I can't believe you're wearing that. And then six months later, it's like, Oh, can I borrow this? You know, and
00:34:02
Speaker
or just different people throughout my life. It's like I've latched on to their style because I like this or like that, but I actually had that revelation a couple of months ago. It's like, what is my style? I had really went to, we make a joke that I'm always wearing black and black's not even like my color. I'm really, I really like color, but I've just gotten stuck in this bubble of just not knowing. So this is like my safe place, but
00:34:31
Speaker
So looking at the style quiz I did on your website, it's saying I'm neutral. So I'm like, okay, well, maybe I'm not too far off, but I'm a teacher and you know, like Pam, I'm also in leggings and just more casual outside of work. And so I need to.
00:34:50
Speaker
Have those pieces that kind of are more versatile to go from you know data you know working to to not but Just wanting to really like amp up that style And so I was very intrigued with what you had on your website, so I'm gonna check it out for sure Yeah, and it is you know it is very important
00:35:12
Speaker
Um, going back to finding and giving yourself space to see what you like for yourself. I recently worked at, he was a man, but this is typical for men where he is whole life. It was his ex-wife buying him stuff, his mom buying him stuff.
00:35:30
Speaker
And when we were going through, he's divorced now. And so he was trying to figure out like, who am I now? He's going through that process of like, now that I am a single man, what do I even like to do? Because everything I did was with my wife and things that she liked to do. She was dressed to me. And when he was trying things on, he put on this like bright yellow shirt. And I asked him, I'm like, how do you feel in this? He goes, my ex wife liked it. I'm like, but do you like it?
Tanya's Book: 'Make It You'
00:35:53
Speaker
And so going through the process of you figuring out what you like for yourself, it's easy that we,
00:35:59
Speaker
Yes, it's good to get inspired by other people, but sometimes we get so lost in trying to follow others because we didn't have that space for ourselves that we give. So being able to have that space and ask yourself questions. And maybe you do like black, which is fine, but you also probably haven't had the space to explore something else and see if that works for you. And
00:36:21
Speaker
I think doing that is really important. Like having a time at the store, even if you don't buy anything, just going and being like, you know, I'm just going to give myself an hour. Let me see what there is out there. Let me try something on and see how I feel in this or if it's something that I'm willing to buy and try to add into my closet and where. So yeah, that's a really good conversation to a topic. Okay. So you're doing the mom thing.
00:36:49
Speaker
doing the closet edit thing, but you also mentioned and told us that you're about to, or you're in the process of writing a book, correct? Is this going to be your first book that you're coming out with? It's going to be my first book. That is so awesome. So can you share more? So what inspired you to want to write a book? What's it going to be called? When are you expecting it to be published? All the things.
00:37:13
Speaker
So it's called Make It You. It's how to overcome self-doubt and step into your power using personal style. It is a hybrid, so it is part of a memoir and client stories, and every chapter is a life lesson, but it's also a style lesson. And the reason why I made this book is
00:37:35
Speaker
As we talked about our life goes through so many different, you go through so many different things in life. You can look back at your life 10 years ago and you're like, I cannot believe I lived through that. And so the book shows different parts of my life and how my style were affected by those parts of my life, how I was dressing, what was important to me at the time and now where I am today.
00:37:59
Speaker
I feel like a lot of style books don't have enough depth. They're all like how they create your and I have them actually right behind me how they create your capsule wardrobe. The top 12 pieces you need to be a powerful woman like people aren't talking about the stories behind personal style. And when I sit and work with clients, I hear literally everything and I'm like people are not having these conversations both men and women, especially men.
00:38:23
Speaker
Think about women. We don't talk with our girlfriends all the time about our body issues, what we're going through with our divorce that's affecting how we're feeling about ourselves. We just know this like outside perspective, but when I'm working in it with people, I'm like, there's so much more to this that people don't realize. So I opened up about my own story and journey that I've been on and also client stories as well. So people can see that perspective of like maybe
00:38:49
Speaker
personal style is something I want to dive into and take care of myself in this way. Okay. I'm going to comment on this many different ways. First of all, I would have never known what a memoir was until the fact that
00:39:05
Speaker
I just did an interview with someone who she does that for a living where she is a memoir coach and author. That's going to, that is the episode that is going to air tomorrow on our podcast. So that's really cool that a God just, it's continuing to align in front of the right people, right place, right time. So that's really cool. Cause you said it, that this, that's what this is or partially is. And I would have never known what that was.
00:39:32
Speaker
So I totally get that. So that's great. I think that's the way that you explain that even, and I haven't even read the book and so I would love to read the book, but just the way that you explain exactly like people coming to evolving, right? Because we all evolve as people. And I guess I've always known that we evolve with style too. But for me, I guess it's always just been as a whole, right?
00:40:02
Speaker
the people are evolving in style as what is in style, what the fashion is at the time, but not necessarily to myself and my style. It's just kind of going with the flow. Oh, skinny jeans right now. Sure. Let's go. Oh, you know, flare legs. Okay. Let's do that too. It's just going along. And it's so funny too, because I'm also the, when they start new, when skinny jeans, I was like, I am not, I will never wear that.
00:40:32
Speaker
And now that's like all I own, except I do have a couple more flare, because as soon as they said flare legs or the wide leg pants were coming back out, I was like, yes, widely, like it's coming back. Because that always had my heart, right? But it was, it's also really funny, because the first time I put those on, I was like, I don't know about this, because it's been years I've been stuck in the skinny jeans that I swore I would never put on. So I've just kind of gone along. And I know a lot of people do, we just kind of go along with
00:41:02
Speaker
what's trending at the time,
Personal Evolution Through Style
00:41:04
Speaker
as opposed to really honing in on who we are and what our style is. And so I think that's a little bit about kind of like what you're saying is that people are, you know, evolving, whether it's a situational thing and who they're with and what that person likes to see them in.
00:41:22
Speaker
or who they're hanging around with and what those people are wearing. And so how we just kind of transition it out. Even for myself at the stylist, the beginning of the book talks about, I started my business when I was 22 years old. Now I work with people in their 20s, but when I started, people in their 20s could not afford working with the stylist. I was working with people in their 50s at that time. And I clearly remember walking into a client's house on a Saturday morning,
00:41:49
Speaker
And she had a daughter that was my age, laying on her bed in pajamas, eating breakfast and not wanting to do anything. I'm like, Oh my gosh, I'm the same age. And I'm in her mom's house trying to help her figure out her style and shop. And I was so insecure with myself at that time that I didn't tell anybody how old I was. I told, I mean, I did. I told everybody's 27.
00:42:13
Speaker
And then when I turned 27, I actually, I made a joke with clients I'd been working with for years. I'm like, guess what? I'm actually 27. In the beginning, funny enough, I was helping other people find their style, but I didn't have my own style. My style that I had created was one that was very conservative. I did not have fun. I did not play with trends. I was like, people need to respect me as not only a woman, but
00:42:39
Speaker
a Latina woman owning her business. So I wore very conservative pieces. And it was until I turned 27 and felt comfortable, like, okay, come out. So much more fun with my style. And that's actually when my business expanded more. When I was able to be more myself, my business grew more. And the more I grew on my journey in personal growth and having others help me in bringing them in.
00:43:07
Speaker
Yeah, everything just like changed from there. So the book is really an evolution of like my life and how my style changed. But how, you know, all the good things that come when you are intentional with what you surround yourself with, whether that's clothing,
Starting The Closet Edit and Overcoming Fears
00:43:20
Speaker
your home, the people around you, you know, the activities that you do, everything that you bring into your life, even clothing affects the person that you become and who you are. Yes, absolutely. So true.
00:43:33
Speaker
Okay. So when, when I come to you and you helped me to find my own personal style and I completely empty out my closet and my husband's wondering why I'm in tons of money, no clothes. I don't be like, because, but I mean, intentionally shopping, babe. How's that different? Yeah. Right.
00:44:00
Speaker
You know, women only. So it's very surprising. A lot of men are very surprised when their women start doing this. And some of them actually buy the services for their wives because their wives won't do it for themselves. They won't put the money in the kids or something else. And the men end up buying it for them.
00:44:18
Speaker
Oh, what like a great Mother's Day's gift, Mother's Day gift or Valentine's gift or birthday gift or, you know, if there's any guys listening, ladies send this out to your husband. My birthday's coming up. I know what I want. Yeah.
00:44:37
Speaker
But well going back to, I know we've talked a little bit about, you know, you said you started your business at 22. What initially was the reasoning for that? Was there anything that you were trying to overcome or did you realize that within yourself or how did that all begin? That's a great question. So initially when I went to college, which a lot of people that are in fashion actually don't go to the school for fashion, they end up finding it later in their lives.
00:45:03
Speaker
But I did go for fashion marketing. I got a bachelor's degree. And when I went to college, I was thinking, I am going to work for Nordstrom. I'm going to work up the ladder because that's very popular here in Seattle. Like I thought I was actually going to be in corporate. And then what ended up happening is you had a week where different people from the fashion industry came to our school to talk about their careers and what they do. And the stylist came in to share what she did. And I immediately at that moment, I was like,
00:45:33
Speaker
That is what I want to do. That combines me helping people. That combines me being creative. I could be my own boss. I actually got married for the first time. This was my third marriage. The first time I got married was 18. So at the time I was married, and in my mind, I thought I was going to have a family early on. And so I was like, oh, I would have the flexibility to be a mom. And I later found out I couldn't have kids. Surprise. I ended up having a kid four years ago. But it was, so I initially started it because
00:46:02
Speaker
I wanted to have a family, but I also wanted to be a career woman. And I really wanted to help others. And I felt like being in corporate, it wouldn't be able to create the impact that I wanted to have. So I graduated and just thought, I'm going to start my own business. And I kept telling people that. And when I signed my first lease, actually, I signed a lease to an office space at 22 years old, was still paying off my college, did not have one client yet.
00:46:31
Speaker
And when I went home to tell my husband at the time that I signed a lease for a year, he looked at me like, what are you thinking? You kept talking about being a seller. I didn't know we're going to do it now. And I called the woman up and I'm like, Hey, you know what? Actually, I don't think I'm going to do this. And she goes, I was crying. And she was like, you need to get your big girl panties on. You signed a lease. You told me you had this vision when you walked into this office and you're going to make it happen. And I did.
00:47:02
Speaker
Actually the first woman that ended up coming in to write about my business, my empty office, she came in, she did a video of me showing how to tie a scarf three different ways. She's still my client today. She became my client and 15 years later, I am still working with her. She has two kids now. She lives in a different place and we're still working together. So it's kind of amazing. That's awesome.
00:47:34
Speaker
That's really cool. Yeah. Go ahead. I'm sorry. Well, no, you're good. I'm just trying to like, that's, that's one of those moments that if she wouldn't have said that to you, that would have potentially changed the trajectory of everything.
Overcoming Fear in Pursuing Passions
00:47:48
Speaker
It's those little moments that if we don't just take the risk or do the thing, then we lose. I mean, imagine how different things would be and how many people's lives you have helped since then. So that's,
00:48:00
Speaker
That's the little moments that we don't need to pass up on just because we're scared or we're nervous about doing something different than what people think we should do.
00:48:10
Speaker
Yeah. And every time you do that hard thing, it just gets easier until you get to the next hard thing. And you're like, how am I going to get through this again? Exactly. I think that all ties it all in, right? So it's just all about overcoming the fear, take the lead, wear the damn dress. You know, just go for it, just do it. And I think that that's at the end of the day, I think that goes for
00:48:37
Speaker
of anything and everything in life. It's just having the faith to just, to just do it and just go for it and anything, whether it's your style, clothes, or in real life situations, starting a business, changing jobs, whatever the case may be. Yeah. It really is all tied together, which is why the book to me is such an important thing I've had on my heart for a long time.
00:49:03
Speaker
Yeah. And that's really, really incredible. I will be buying it to read that. I'm very intrigued by that to hear the whole style thing and finding your own style is very, very intriguing to me because I've never ever looked at it or thought of it that way whatsoever. And I think a lot of women are going to be, it's going to be very eyeopening for them to hear what exactly you do and how you can help and to help people find their style.
00:49:28
Speaker
So everything that we discussed today in your interview, what's, what's the number one thing that you want listeners to take away? Oh my gosh, out of everything. I think that what is most important for me is community and asking for help. I think as women, we like to think, and especially for myself, like I, I like to think I could do it all and you cannot learning how to ask for help in any situation that you're in.
00:49:56
Speaker
is what is going to change your life. You're going to have less stress. You're going to feel like you could do more. You're going to open up a space for yourself that you can step into that you couldn't before.
Concluding Thoughts on Style and Community
00:50:07
Speaker
So ask for help, whatever it is, bring a community together where you guys can help each other. I think that's going to change everything for you. Yes, yes, yes, yes. Having people, the community, and just to know that you are not alone. I know that we repeat that here over and over and over again. And that's a big part of what we do here is just
00:50:26
Speaker
for women to know that they are not alone because having the community of people to relate to or just talk to, how many times I say things and I'm like, I feel like I'm the only one. I just had a conversation with Manny the other day. We're driving in the car. I'm like, I got to tell you something really weird that I do. And I'm like, I don't know if you're going to understand or not. And I told her and she was like, I know exactly. And she was finishing my sentence and I'm like, I do it too. I really, I really didn't think that
00:50:52
Speaker
that there was somebody who this really weird thing happens to me all the time and it freaks me out. And she was like, yep, me too. And I'm like, gosh, you made me feel so much better that I know that I'm not the only person because it's something that I don't want to tell people. They're gonna be like, you're weird. That's what I think to myself, right? If I say these things, people are gonna be like, you're up. That's crazy. You're weird. So it's just having someone to relate to and just knowing that you're not alone. Cause I know so many of us feel that way.
00:51:18
Speaker
Exactly. Well, we always end our podcast by asking, finding my best self, the woman beyond the Cape. What does that mean to you? I feel like finding your best self is finding people, things surrounding yourself with everybody and the things that make you feel like you. When you feel like you're trying to put up a persona and it feels so out of touch with who you are,
00:51:44
Speaker
It creates anxiety. I mean, I've been through that in my life, even during that part of myself that I had to hide for so long. It creates so much anxiety that you can't do the things that bring you joy and that just let you shine. So I think that is what is finding your best self, surrounding yourself with people and things that help you feel more like you. Absolutely. I love that response. We haven't gotten that one before. And I love the way that you put that.
00:52:15
Speaker
Well, Tanya, thank you. Thank you again for coming on today and interviewing with us. I absolutely loved it. I loved it. I was also very intrigued by the closet edit prior to talking to you, but now that you've really explained it, I love it that much more. I think what you're doing is incredible for anyone who comes to you to help them. It's something that a lot of people may not know that they want or need help with.
00:52:44
Speaker
as well like myself and you have just opened a whole new world in door for me. So I am thanking you personally and hopefully I'll be in touch with you soon and hopefully it resonated with our listeners. I'm also just in awe of you and of who you are as a person, your personality and everything that you're doing in the book that you've chosen to write. It's just everything. So kudos to you. I think you're incredible and what you're doing is incredible.
00:53:13
Speaker
Thank you so much. I really enjoyed spending time today. And yes, it was definitely a conversation I felt could keep going. So we'll definitely have to have another conversation too. Yeah, for sure. So if you're listening and you were intrigued by the closet edit, or you are looking for someone to help you find your own personal style,
00:53:36
Speaker
We are going to put all of Tanya's information in the show notes so you can reach out to her. If this episode resonated with you or if you have a friend who you think might be intrigued by this, send it to them and help to get Tanya's information out there because I think what she's doing is absolutely brilliant because it's not anything like I've ever heard before. Other than that, thanks for tuning in again and we'll chat with you guys soon.
00:54:05
Speaker
Well, that's a wrap on today's episode of finding my best self. It's been real. It's been fun. We hope you found a piece of your story in ours and feel a little more inspired to chase after your best self. And don't forget to share this episode with someone who needs a little boost today or a good laugh and make sure to subscribe to our podcast. So you never miss an episode. Nothing says owning your confidence, like a new outfit from MBS Fitco. Check out the show notes for the link to shop our luxury athleisure. Go ahead, girl, treat yourself.
00:54:35
Speaker
And if you've got a story to share or a topic you're dying for us to cover, drop us a line. Our email is in the show notes. Just reach out and let's keep the conversation going. So until next time, keep owning your confidence, embracing the chaos. And remember, the best version of you is just an episode away. And again, we love you and we're endlessly rooting for you.