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Drawing the Line: Setting Bold Goals and Embracing Change in 2025
38 Plays18 days ago
In this solo episode of Finding My Best Self, Pam Rivet dives into the transformative power of goal-setting and how to turn aspirations into reality. Reflecting on her own journey and insights from Darren Hardy’s powerful book, Pam discusses the importance of setting BHAGs (Big Hairy Audacious Goals), living with gratitude, and finding balance in every aspect of life. She shares personal stories, scripture, and actionable steps to inspire you to draw the line, embrace change, and prioritize your future. This episode is a heartfelt invitation to step into your purpose with courage, faith, and intention.
Darren Hardy book 'Living Your Best Year Ever'
And as always, remember:
YOU ARE STRONG.
YOU ARE CAPABLE.
YOU ARE WORTHY.
I love you and I’m ENDLESSLY rooting for you!
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Transcript
Intro
00:00:57
Pamela Rivet
Hello
Introduction and Excitement for 2025
00:00:58
Pamela Rivet
and welcome back to another episode of Finding My Best Self podcast. I am your host, Pam Rivette. Alone today, I am doing my first solo of 2025. And it's been a long time since I've done a solo, so I am so excited to chat with you today.
Goal Setting and Year in Review
00:01:18
Pamela Rivet
I have something that I want to share and it goes really well with last week's episode if you had a chance to listen when Mandy and I talked about, you know, just doing your year in review and talking about, you know, 2025 and what we want to see.
00:01:34
Pamela Rivet
and goal setting. And that's what I want to really dive into today very specifically is setting goals and what that looks like.
Personal Inspirations for Goal Setting
00:01:43
Pamela Rivet
You know that I'm always very open with you and very authentic and real about what I am personally doing in my own life to implement certain things. And there is a book slash workbook that someone gifted to me.
00:02:01
Pamela Rivet
that I am working on. And as I was doing it, I was like, wow, this is really incredible. It has some really good nuggets in it. And just the whole ah ah scheme of it is just it's it's great. And I wanted to share it with you. And today,
00:02:20
Pamela Rivet
is Sunday for me. I'm recording on a Sunday and you know, I'm always, I want to be very intentional with anything that I do in life, but very specifically these podcasts episodes.
Insights on Goal Setting
00:02:30
Pamela Rivet
And so before I recorded, I was like, you know, let me go to church and just pray on it and ask God to speak through me to you today. And of course I went to church today and the entire service was totally in line with what I want to talk about today. So I have tons of notes taken, my own personal thoughts on goal setting, as well as I'm going to read you some things word for word from this book thing that I'm reading and also some scriptures.
00:03:09
Pamela Rivet
So, and I will also link in the show notes, the name of the book, as well as some additional free resources that you can get if you're interested in purchasing it.
Courage and BHAGs
00:03:22
Pamela Rivet
So let's dive in.
00:03:24
Pamela Rivet
Goal setting. Goal setting is so far beyond just saying, these are the goals that I have for the year or for the next, you know, three years, five years, 10 years, whatever it is. It's far beyond just stating them. And when we talk about setting goals, one thing that I have learned over the last few years and all of the books that I read and podcasts that I listen to,
00:03:54
Pamela Rivet
is setting really big goals, big, hairy, audacious goals. They call it the BHAG, right? Big, hairy, audacious goals. Goals that when you say them out loud, you go, no way could I ever achieve that. But you can. You can achieve any goals that you truly want and you truly desire to have in your life, but you have to make a change.
00:04:24
Pamela Rivet
You have to do something different in order to achieve those BHAG goals. They say that the definition of insanity is doing the same thing over and over again, expecting a different result. And it doesn't work that way. In order to see change, you have to do something different. And you can change the entire course of your life.
The Importance of 'Why' in Goals
00:04:50
Pamela Rivet
I know I am living proof that your past does not define you and that you can change who you are. You can change your future. You may not be able to change the past, but you can turn the page. Your future is wide open. It's a blank slate and you can choose how that's going to look and what you're going to do and what those new goals are going to be. And you know, you have to choose to draw the line.
00:05:21
Pamela Rivet
And even if it means physically drawing the figurative line and saying today is the day that I am choosing to make a change, to make a change in my life, to do better, to be better, to set those be had goals that I am going to achieve and to truly feel it and believe it with everything in you.
00:05:47
Pamela Rivet
You know, there are many, many people who are very, very successful. And if you read their books and listen to their podcasts and their stories, they all had a point in their life where it was a turning point where they finally put their foot down and said, enough is enough. Today is the day that I am deciding to make a change and to make my future better.
00:06:11
Pamela Rivet
And I hope that after listening to this podcast today, that you can choose that today is your day, that today is the day that you're going to draw that line in the sand and say enough is enough.
Commitment to Change and Personal Goals
00:06:22
Pamela Rivet
And I am going to change things that I am doing, leave the past in the past and set some really big, hairy, audacious goals for myself, muster up the courage to do it.
00:06:36
Pamela Rivet
The only thing separating you from a better future is lack of courage. So just find that courage within you, put your foot down and draw the line. They say that your why is greater than the how.
00:06:56
Pamela Rivet
He told a story in this book that I am reading. It's by Darren Hardy. And he told a story of some boys that were in the woods. And he said there were three boys and they stopped at some point and there was this big tree on the other side. And they all said, let's see who can get there the fastest. You have to walk no running.
00:07:21
Pamela Rivet
And so two of the boys started and as they walked, they looked down at the ground and kept putting one foot forward in front of the other, one, one in front of the other. And then whenever they got to the other side, they looked back and realized that they had staggered and going in different directions the whole way there. are And then the third boy, he looked forward the whole time. He kept his eyes on that tree.
00:07:48
Pamela Rivet
And he had a straight shot there and he made it there faster than the other two because he didn't stagger. That's what we do in life is whenever we're constantly looking down, taking one step at a time and being so cautious with every step that we take, rather than just keeping our eyes forward, looking towards the future, looking at the horizon, as opposed to looking down and trying to make sure that every step we take is perfect.
00:08:17
Pamela Rivet
Think of it like that. He also told another story that actually kind of made me tear up a little bit because it was such a big realization. I guess a big eye opener. He said, if someone were to give you or tell you, I have a pole that's 10 inches wide and 30 feet long, I'm going to put it down and I'll give you $20 if you walk it.
00:08:44
Pamela Rivet
You would say, of course, ah absolutely. I'm going to do it. Give him my $20. He said, now what if I put that 30 foot pole in between two tall buildings and told you to walk it? You would stop and say, you're crazy. I'm not doing that.
00:09:02
Pamela Rivet
And then he said, what if I put your child on the other building opposite from you and that building was on fire and that fire was creeping up behind your child? Would you walk it? I was like, wow, it's your why. That's your why. Your why is the things that you would die for. Things that you would choose to live for.
00:09:31
Pamela Rivet
I'll share one other story with you that he shared in regards to this. And I guess he told so many stories about it because it truly is that important to find your why and your purpose and your passion for the goals that you're about to set.
00:09:48
Pamela Rivet
He said that there was this village of people and they were out in the mountains. And then someone came in the middle of the night and kidnapped a baby and took it off into the woods. And he said, these group of men went out together to go and search for the baby and they climbed and they climbed and they tried to dig
Year-in-Review and Gratitude
00:10:10
Pamela Rivet
different paths and different trails to get to the top of the mountain where they knew that this baby was trying to search and trying And none of them could get to the top of the mountain. All of the trails were dead ends and they weren't getting anywhere. And just as they were calling off their search and getting ready to turn around, the mama of the baby walks up with the baby strapped to her back. And they all looked at her in amazement saying, how did you manage to climb that mountain? How did you manage to find that baby? And she looked at them and she said, because it wasn't your baby.
00:10:48
Pamela Rivet
It's your goals. It is the things that you want to have and desire in life. And you are the only one who is going to go after and to treat those goals like your baby. No one else is going to be able to achieve them for you. So let's talk about it. How do you set those goals? How do you dig deep?
00:11:12
Pamela Rivet
and think about what it is that you truly want in life. Your why, what is your baby? So first, we have to commit. Do you commit to drawing that line to saying, today is the day that I am going to commit to setting these goals and not just setting them, but working and doing everything I have to do to not just write them down and see them, but for them to actually happen. So once you've committed and you've made that decision, the first thing to do is to do a year in review. And when you're doing this year in review, it's something that we talked about in the last podcast and just thinking about the past year in 2024. But in this review, specifically think about yourself.
00:12:09
Pamela Rivet
and think about positive things. Don't think about the negatives. Think about things that you have done done and great, great things, at least three things that were really great in 2024. Think about three things that you're really proud of that happened. Think about three things that you would love to do more of in 2025.
00:12:38
Pamela Rivet
Think of three things that you wish you would have done differently in 2024. And then maybe think of three things that you say, I need to absolutely stop doing in 2025. A year in review should come from a positive place and not a negative place and not beating yourself up over the year.
00:13:02
Pamela Rivet
but also not just looking at it in a positive way. It's also looking at what can I do better, right? Not beating yourself up and saying, oh, I did so bad at that. And, you know, don't, don't beat yourself up. It's taking it as a lesson and saying, okay, that was okay, but I could have, let's do better this year. And how am I going to do better this year? The next thing that you have to do,
00:13:27
Pamela Rivet
is to live in abundance.
Balance Sheet for Life
00:13:31
Pamela Rivet
You know, we talk about this all the time. This is something that Mandy and I preach a lot, not just in the podcast, but also within our brand is having gratitude. Gratitude is a choice. And so when you're making your list of gratitude, you want to think about who are you grateful for? What people?
00:13:56
Pamela Rivet
What are you grateful for about the home that you live in? What are you grateful for about your work, about your talents, the things that you do well? You're so unique. Think about those things. What makes you different and unique that you're so grateful for? What knowledge that did you pick up in 2024 that you're grateful for, that you maybe didn't know before?
00:14:21
Pamela Rivet
and what things in your life have happened that make you lucky because you are so lucky. And I'm sure you can find three things that you are so lucky to have in your life. Making a list of gratitude and and and and living in abundance is about being grateful for what you have today.
00:14:48
Pamela Rivet
not what you want to have in the future or what you will have in the future, but finding gratitude and happiness and joy and how your life is today. Even if it's not the life that you thought you'd be living in this moment, even if it's not everything you ever hoped and dreamed of, you have so many reasons to be grateful. You are so blessed. And so if you choose to live in abundance,
00:15:18
Pamela Rivet
and see how much you have in your life and choose to live with gratitude. More and more will just continue to pour into your life. That's the law of attraction is that you will attract more and more good and more things to be grateful for if you can find a way to be grateful for what you already have.
00:15:42
Pamela Rivet
Next thing you want to do is a balance sheet. So this was something a little new to me whenever I did it. It's basically creating a circle, circle, ah a weighted circle in your life. So if you do a little chart where if you would draw a T and then, know, draw a cross inside, like make a star basically. Right. And then on each of those lines, you label them out. So your family, your mental health, your spiritual health, financial health, all of the different, all the different categories in your life. And you categorize them one being the worst and 10 being the best on each line.
00:16:27
Pamela Rivet
And then once you're done and you connect all of the dots, you want to see a big round full circle. And that way you know that you have balance in your life. If you'd see mine, it looks a little crazy. It's like a little.
00:16:45
Pamela Rivet
crooked semicircle within a big point in it. It doesn't look great. And that's what I'm working on this year. If you listen to the last podcast, I said one thing that I really realized last year was that I was lacking a lot of balance in my life. So this is something that I'm going to continue to reevaluate throughout the year and looking at that balance sheet again and to make sure that I am doing better and better with that balance in my life.
00:17:12
Pamela Rivet
So I want to read you one of the quotes out of this book in regards to this portion of the ballot sheet. And this quote really stood out to me when I read it and hit me because this is exactly what happened to me in 2024.
00:17:30
Pamela Rivet
It says life without balance can cost you your relationships. Life without balance can cost you your health. Life without balance can cost you your spirituality. Life without balance can cost you your wealth and your happiness. So find things to motivate you from all areas of your life. Your success depends on it. And that's a quote by Jim Rahn.
00:17:54
Pamela Rivet
And that is so true. So when you don't have balance in your life, there may be some areas where things are going so good and it's so great and your heart feels so happy. But then when you look in other areas of your life, you're like, wow, that could definitely be better.
00:18:14
Pamela Rivet
So let's talk about the guidelines.
Writing and Visualizing Goals
00:18:18
Pamela Rivet
the guidelines for setting these goals and exactly what you're going to do whenever you sit down to write these goals. Now that you've got your mindset right, you're living in abundance, you have your gratitude list, you're committed, you've done your year in review, you're ready to sit down and write out those goals.
00:18:41
Pamela Rivet
That's just what you're going to do. Write them. Don't just say them. We're not just going to speak these goals. We're not just going to speak them into existence. We're going to actually write them down because there is something about putting pen to paper. When you put pen to paper, it just makes it a lot more real.
00:19:01
Pamela Rivet
And you want to really think about it. Think about these goals, about what you want those goals to be and what you want to look like. Make this a very intentional exercise. Don't just throw things on a piece of paper, right? We want to really sit back and think deeply about what we want our future life to look like.
00:19:21
Pamela Rivet
One of these quotes in here says, reduce your plan to writing. The moment you complete this, you will have definitely given concrete form to the intangible desire. That's by Napoleon Hill. The next thing we're going to do is suspend reality. We're going to live in a fantasy land and make believe and just think about what your life would look like in a fantasy world. You know, my friend Jenna does this really well and there's a goal that she has in her life and she talks about it all the time. And I know that one day this is going to be her reality, but she says very often and talks about how one day she is going to be sitting on her yacht that she owns out the country, laid back, s s sipping her,
00:20:15
Pamela Rivet
non-alcoholic beverage and hanging out with her friends and family and that she's going to have someone who's going to be serving them food on her yacht. You know, and that's one of her BHAG goals, that big, hairy, audacious goal that when she says it out loud, like, who am I to own a yacht? And she will. I know, whole, I know with everything in me, Jenna will own that yacht one day. Why? Because she believes in that goal and she knows that she's capable and that she wants it and she's going to continue to work towards that. That's the kind of goals that we're talking about. Those goals that just seem so big right now and so scary.
Affirmations and Aligning Goals
00:20:55
Pamela Rivet
There's another quote by Albert Einstein that says, the same thinking that has led you to where you are is not going to lead you where you want to go. So you have to change the way that you think. If you think, oh, I'm not capable of, or I'm not worthy of, or who am I to have that?
00:21:16
Pamela Rivet
Change those thoughts and say, absolutely, I'm going to have that yacht one day. It might take me 10 years. It might only take me five, but I'm going to have that yacht one day. What are those big, hairy, audacious goals? That even though you feel that you can't have them now, you're willing to do the work and to believe that one day those things will be your reality. I've said it already kind of, but I'll say it again.
00:21:47
Pamela Rivet
Go big. Go really, really, really big. Dig really deep. And just when you think you've gone big enough and thought big enough, think bigger. There is no limitations to the goals that you can set for yourself. You can do anything that you want. Another Napoleon Hill quote says, whatever the mind can conceive and believe, the mind can achieve.
00:22:18
Pamela Rivet
It's all in your head. It's all mental. That is when they talk about being able to see what you truly believe that you deserve. You can make your reality because when you truly believe in your heart with everything in you, that you deserve those things that you have visualized in the goals that you have put on paper and you put them down that are your goals. You can make those a reality.
00:22:48
Pamela Rivet
and don't set your goals too low. Because if you don't need much, you won't become much. That is another quote by Jim Braun. When I read that, I was like, wow, that's so true. Because we can attain any goals that we want, right? So why set them so low? Why set those goals so low? Because you're gonna get there and you're gonna be like, man,
00:23:14
Pamela Rivet
I could have done more or I should do more. So now you're going to start doing more when you could have achieved something even bigger to begin with. So set the bar high. Where you're going to set the bar is where you're going to get to. So don't set a low bar. You're worthy and capable of so much more than setting the bar too low.
00:23:37
Pamela Rivet
We're going to speak in the positive. And this is what the entire MVS woman beyond the cape brand is all about. Speaking in I am affirmations and speaking in the now and speaking in it's going to, and it is happening and not I want or I will have. Those aren't goals. Those are just dreams. Those are just wishes.
00:24:06
Pamela Rivet
thinking things that they might happen, they might not, or just thinking that we're just going to snap our fingers and poof, or just being hopeful that maybe they will. When we speak in I am, I am versus I want.
00:24:26
Pamela Rivet
You don't say, I want to be a millionaire. You say, I am a millionaire by December 31st of whatever year. It doesn't have to be this year. It doesn't have to be in the next 12 months. Big, hairy, audacious goals sometimes can take three years or five years or 10 years. Do that. Set those goals, set those big goals and say, I am this by this date.
00:24:51
Pamela Rivet
I have this by this date. It's okay to put a deadline to it, but still speak in the now. Speak in the positive. Be positive. That's what it's all about. And be sure they are your goals. And what I mean by that is it's not goals that you think that you should have. It's goals that you truly want, that you truly desire.
00:25:19
Pamela Rivet
In church today, the pastor talked about this. And he said, a lot of us sometimes that we state what our values are in life. But what we do doesn't necessarily align with what we've stated. And that goes hand in hand with goal setting and making sure it's your goals. You want it to be things that you truly value, your core values in life.
00:25:46
Pamela Rivet
what you believe in, what you truly want, and what you truly believe that you are capable of. Those are the things that we should be stating. Those are the things that we should be writing down. Those are the things that we should be living out.
00:26:02
Pamela Rivet
Don't say that you do or want something and then don't do it. Your stated goals, your stated values should align with everything that you are doing. Every action, every word, every thought out of every day. So make sure that your, your values and your goals align.
00:26:23
Pamela Rivet
And last but not least, don't be afraid to fight.
Overcoming Limitations and Faith
00:26:27
Pamela Rivet
Don't be afraid to fight. This completely goes back to scripture. And the pastor talked about that as well in church today. You know, in the book that I'm reading, he gave a list. He said, for example, Luke had Darth Vader. Batman had the Joker. David.
00:26:49
Pamela Rivet
Had Goliath, 20 somethings, have the man. Apple has Microsoft. These days, Microsoft kind of has Apple. Even God has Satan. We all have an enemy. We all have something or someone, person, place, or thing that is going to try to hold us back from obtaining those goals. But don't be afraid to fight.
00:27:17
Pamela Rivet
It says in the Bible over and over again, fear not, God is with us to be strong and courageous. One of the scriptures that we read over today in church was from two chronicles, chapter 20, verses 15 to 21. I'm going to read that to you. It's a little lengthy, so just bear with me.
00:27:40
Pamela Rivet
He said, listen, all you people of Judah and Jerusalem, listen King Jehoshaphat. This is what the Lord says, do not be afraid. Don't be discouraged by this mighty army for the battle is not yours, but God's. Tomorrow, march out against them. You will find them coming up through the ascent of Ziz at the end of the valley that opens into the wilderness of Jerul.
00:28:08
Pamela Rivet
But you will not even need to fight. Take your positions, then stand still and watch the Lord's victory. He is with you. O people of Judah and Jerusalem, do not be afraid or discouraged. Go out against them tomorrow, for the Lord is with you.
00:28:26
Pamela Rivet
Then King Jehoshaphat bowed low with his face to the ground, and all the people of Judah and Jerusalem did the same, worshipping the Lord. Then the Levites from the clans of Coeth and Korah stood to praise the Lord, the God of Israel, with a very loud shout. Early the next morning, the army of Judah went out into the wilderness of Tychoa.
00:28:52
Pamela Rivet
On the way, Jehoshaphat stopped and said, Listen to me, all you people of Judah and Jerusalem. Believe in the Lord your God and you will be able to stand firm. Believe in his prophets and you will succeed. After consulting the people, the king appointed singers to walk ahead of the army, singing to the Lord and praising him for his holy splendor. This is what they sang. Give thanks to the Lord.
00:29:21
Pamela Rivet
Faithful love endures forever.
00:29:24
Pamela Rivet
Even though the army was being sent out to war, they knew that they were doing something so scary. They knew that there was a chance that they would lose their life. They chose to worship. Leading into war, they led with worship.
00:29:49
Pamela Rivet
because they were told, do not be afraid. Be strong and courageous. The Lord is with you. And that is what the pastor talks about today is if we lead with worship and everything we do, even when things are hard, even when things aren't going right, even when things seems super scary and like you're in a valley and that the world is crumbling at your feet,
00:30:18
Pamela Rivet
lead with worship.
Prioritizing God and Self-belief
00:30:20
Pamela Rivet
And worship is far beyond just song. It's far beyond just singing. Worship is everything that you do. You worship the Lord by the way that you carry yourself, by the way that you speak to people. The things that you do is all worship. It is all forms and ways of showing God that we are faithful to Him for His faithfulness to us.
00:30:48
Pamela Rivet
It is a way to praise our God for all that he has done for us. So don't be afraid to fight. And then we want to abandon those limiting beliefs. That is so hard to do because every day we're all human and those limiting beliefs are always going to pop up. No matter how much we try to stop them, they're going to pop up.
00:31:16
Pamela Rivet
but you are capable and those demons need to be silenced. You just remember your worth. Remember those goals that you set and pull them out and you read them.
00:31:29
Pamela Rivet
Don't stop believing in the power of you. The pastor also said today, is that what you put your focus on?
00:31:40
Pamela Rivet
is what becomes your reality. He gave an example, uh, and it was funny cause all I could think about was my husband because I'm not at that point in my life where I'm struggling with my sight. But he said, you know, as you get older, your vision tends to worsen a little and you go to the restaurant and they give you the menu and it's like your arms aren't long enough. You know, you see people who, who their eyesight starting to, you know, to get bad and they're like pulling the menu away from their face so they can see it.
00:32:11
Pamela Rivet
And so you pull out your phone and you get the app, the magnifying app, so it'll make the words bigger so you can see them. He says, the font size never changed. It's still a size on the paper, 12 font. It never changed. You just magnified what was in front of you. So if you magnify God and you see him and put him at the forefront of your life,
00:32:39
Pamela Rivet
If you magnify those goals and keep them right there in your face and right there, right in front of you, real big so that you can see them constantly and you put them first in your life, those are the things that are going to come to you. Those are the things that are going to constantly push you in life. You're going to see God. You're going to follow God. You're going to seek God and His guidance and wisdom.
00:33:03
Pamela Rivet
You're gonna see those goals and believe them even more with each and every day that you remind yourself how capable you are of them. But if all you're magnifying in your life is the things that aren't right or the things that you don't have, that's what you're gonna continue to see and that's what you're gonna get more of. So focus on magnifying the things that you want to be plentiful in your life that you want more of.
00:33:33
Pamela Rivet
Those are the things that we want to look at. I want to read in one other Bible scripture. It is Ephesians 2 verses 8 through 10. And it says, God saved you by his grace when you believed. And you can't take credit for this. It is a gift from God. Salvation is not a reward.
00:33:58
Pamela Rivet
for the good things we have done so none of us can boast about it. For we are God's masterpiece. He has created us anew in Christ Jesus so we can do good things He planned for us long ago." This was what the entire service today was around was that we were created to do good things. We were created to work. We were created to do the things that God put us here to do. Don't lose sight of that. You were created to do so much more and to have so much more. God can change your life. If you just keep your focus on him,
00:34:42
Pamela Rivet
and continue to believe in the power of you and what you are capable of and all of the goals that you want to have in your life.
Closing Motivation on BHAGs
00:34:51
Pamela Rivet
And I'll close this out with reading this very last quote from the book, and this is by the author, Darren Hardy. It says, our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate. Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure.
00:35:10
Pamela Rivet
It is our light, not our darkness that frightens us. We ask ourselves, who am I to be brilliant, gorgeous, talented, and fabulous? Actually, who are you not to be? You are a child of God. Your playing small doesn't serve the world. There's nothing enlightened about shrinking so that other people won't feel insecure around you.
00:35:38
Pamela Rivet
We are all meant to shine as children do. We are born to make manifest the glory of God that is within us. It's not just in some of us, it's in everyone. And as we let our own light shine, we unconsciously give other people permission to do the same. As we are liberated from our own fear, our presence automatically liberates others.
00:36:07
Pamela Rivet
Don't let fear control you. Have faith over fear. You are capable of so much more than you give yourself credit for. Remember that when you are setting those big, hairy, audacious goals. I hope that in this episode, you feel inspired. I hope in this episode, you decide to draw the line.
00:36:35
Pamela Rivet
I hope you decide to say yes to you and to making a change and to your future and that you can and will do things you may not have ever thought possible.
00:36:50
Pamela Rivet
Always remember you are strong, you are worthy, and you are capable. I love you and I am endlessly rooting for you. I hope you'll have a blessed day.