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Embracing the Shift: Leveling Up to Your Authentic Self
4 Plays9 months ago
In this heartfelt duo episode, Pam and Mandi open up about experiencing profound life shifts. It's about those moments when everything you once enjoyed begins to feel out of alignment—friends, hobbies, even your favorite places. Though it might seem like a period of isolation or stir up feelings of anxiety and depression, we're here to share a powerful message: this is your cue to level up. It's the universe's way of nudging you towards your true purpose and most authentic self. Join us as we share our personal journeys through this transformation, from the struggles of last summer to the growth and clarity we've found. This episode is a beacon for anyone feeling lost in the shift, guiding you to embrace the change and step confidently into your destiny.
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Transcript
Life Changes and Shifts
00:00:00
Speaker
And if you're kind of wondering what we're talking about, whenever we say you feel you're feeling a shift or you're feeling something different. For us, this felt like the people that I'm hanging around with, it doesn't feel right. The things that I'm saying or doing
00:00:19
Speaker
just don't feel right anymore. The places that I'm going, the music that I'm listening to, all of those things just start to not feel right anymore. And it is a very odd feeling.
Introduction to the Podcast and Its Themes
00:00:34
Speaker
Hey girl, welcome to Finding My Best Self, the podcast where it's totally okay to show up in your leggings and messy bun, because let's be real, that's our uniform here. The only rule is to be unapologetically yourself. And I'm Mandi, and joining me is Pam, the queen of Finding the Silver Linings. We're here to share laughs, tears, and everything in between. Think of us as your new best friends with some stories to tell and wisdom to share.
00:00:57
Speaker
From face palms to victories, we're diving into the journey of self-discovery, wellness, and what it means to truly embrace who you are. So whether you're conquering the world or just trying to find your phone in the black hole, I mean purse, we've got you covered. Because here it's all about encouraging you to lace up those sneakers or don't, we're not judging. And join us as we explore what is truly means to own your confidence and find your best self. So pour yourself a cup of coffee or a glass of wine and let's get into it.
Personal Experiences of Isolation and Growth
00:01:29
Speaker
Hi there and welcome back to another episode of Finding My Best Self. This week you have Manny and I together doing one of our duo episodes and this week we decided we wanted to chat about something that's been coming up a lot lately. We've been talking to some new people that we've been introduced to and just our close friends and it's a topic that keeps coming up over and over again.
00:01:59
Speaker
So I feel like maybe this is something that's collectively going on in the universe and it's just everybody's maybe kind of trying not trying but everyone is feeling this pull feeling a shift happening in yourself and in your life and It can be very scary. It can be very confusing and
00:02:22
Speaker
it can feel like depression and anxiety. So we just wanted to kind of unpack it because it's something that both Mandy and I have talked a lot about over the last several months, that it's something that we've both experienced over the last year or two and are still experiencing today. So we just wanted to share our personal experiences and kind of what that looked like and felt like for us.
00:02:49
Speaker
and where it's gotten us to now and kind of where we're going with it forward from here. So I guess, Mandy, you can kind of start off with kind of where you were a year or two ago and when you really started feeling the shift happening in your life.
00:03:09
Speaker
And we've talked about this too, that a lot happened last summer for both of us without either of us really having those conversations at that time.
00:03:20
Speaker
you know, we really became isolated. And when I say isolated, it's almost like you kind of took yourself away from your social groups or just, you know, engagements with other people and found ourselves really like digging deep into who we are, what we wanted, and then where to go. And at the time it was almost depression for me. And I think for Pam also that
00:03:46
Speaker
it looked felt sounded like depression anxiety all these heightened emotions but looking back it definitely was a growing moment for us isolation as far as like we both got it more into like our spiritual realm and just trying to really dig deeper into
00:04:05
Speaker
you know, why are we here? What's our purpose? What are we trying to focus on? And it's just one of those things that now like looking back in every aspect of our lives, you know, you kind of go into these moments of what you feel like are these big depressive moments, you always come out on the other side, learning something growing, or just realizing something about yourself that you didn't know before. So like we say, it's almost like
00:04:31
Speaker
When it's time to level up, you get into these moments of isolation. And that's whenever God can really dig deep with you and show you what you're supposed to be doing. Regardless if that makes sense at the time, which most of the time it doesn't. It just feels really hard. And so I know both of us kind of experienced that last summer.
Changing Social Dynamics and Fitting In
00:04:51
Speaker
obviously since then so much has changed. And so we really just kind of wanted to touch on that because I feel like this happens a lot for people and they don't necessarily understand, you know, these different changes or shifts in our life can be used for the better or for good things. Yeah.
00:05:10
Speaker
So it's one of those things. And if you're kind of wondering what we're talking about, whenever we say you feel you're feeling a shift or you're feeling something different for us, this felt like the people that I'm hanging around with, it doesn't feel right. The things that I'm saying or doing
00:05:32
Speaker
just don't feel right anymore. The places that I'm going, the music that I'm listening to, all of those things just start to not feel right anymore. And it's, it is a very odd feeling, right? Because you go through your whole life. Like we've talked to, Mandy and I talked that we've gone through a whole life of having all of these different friend groups, right? And growing up and I had, I personally, and Mandy said she did as well, I had,
00:06:01
Speaker
several different friend groups that were very, very different in dynamics. And over the years, you know, friends came and went and I always felt like maybe a little bit of an outsider in all of my friend groups. And I think that's why all of my friend groups changed so much is because I was always trying to find my place.
00:06:26
Speaker
And with each group of friends that I hung out with, what I didn't know at the time that I can now look back on and say that what I was really doing was more so like a people pleasing or just me doing what everybody else was doing because I was just trying to fit in. But it wasn't really because that was authentically me or who I was.
Lifestyle Shifts and Personal Growth
00:06:48
Speaker
And so
00:06:50
Speaker
I think, you know, it was last year a little bit more like the year before is when I really kind of started to feel it. And then last year was when it really hit home. I started having those feelings of, you know, these things just don't feel right. Like I don't want to be a drinker. I don't want to be drunk all the time. I don't want to listen to certain types of genres of music.
00:07:17
Speaker
You know, I want to have a closer and better relationship with God. I, you know, want to have more of a home life and family life. I want to focus more on myself and what's my purpose in life and where I'm going. And I started having all of those feelings and they get like really, really intense. And it's, it's hard. And that's, I think where, like you said, it starts feeling like depression or anxiety.
00:07:44
Speaker
And you kind of start to isolate yourself because you're wanting to pull back, right? From the people, the places, the things that you were always your whole life doing or seeing or acting all these ways. And you kind of start to pull back because you're like, okay, I don't feel like I want to do those things. But then you start getting the comments.
00:08:10
Speaker
Or the phone calls of, what do you mean you don't want to come hang out? Or why don't you want to do that? Or what's wrong with you? You're acting different. What's wrong with you? Why are you not, you know, acting this way, that way, doing this? Yeah. It's for sure that judgment that also pushes you back into that depression because you're like, well, what is wrong with me? Like, why am I feeling this way?
00:08:32
Speaker
It is. Or then, or then you feel guilty. Or then you feel like, Oh, well, you know, Oh, I should because, you know, cause like you said, I start feeling like, well, what is wrong with you? Let me just go. I'm just going to go where I'm just going to go do or whatever. And then you go. And then you feel like crap again. Yeah. You feel off the whole time. Just something's not right. Something's not right. And then you get back home and you're like, that just didn't feel
Understanding Personal Shifts as Growth, not Depression
00:09:00
Speaker
good. And
00:09:01
Speaker
And so it just becomes very confusing, which turns into feelings of like, I'm depressed or I'm having all this anxiety. And Mandy and I can both say now, looking back on one, because for me, it was last, was it July last year for you two? Or was it around that June, July? Yeah. Where I just felt
00:09:27
Speaker
Super like I was depressed and and it was you know, cuz I do remember telling One of my friends at that time. I was like, it's really weird I was like because I've experienced depression before right I've experienced very very deep dark depression suicidal depression I've experienced that in my life But what I experienced last July was different and that's what I kept I was trying to verbalize it and I didn't know how because I was like I
00:09:55
Speaker
I feel so depressed, but I don't really have a reason to be depressed because every time I was in depressive episodes, there were things going on that led to that, that I knew that that was why I was so depressed. And I was like, I don't understand because I'm like, I
00:10:12
Speaker
I feel this depression coming on, but I'm like, I don't know what it is. And so now looking back, I can say that it's not, I wasn't depressed, right? And that's why I was so, I was confused in it all. I was confused in what I was feeling. I was cute, confused on whether I was depressed or not. I was like, what is this pull, this shift that I feel? And so now looking back is that that's,
00:10:41
Speaker
not what it was. It wasn't depression. It was just that I was shifting and I had to come to terms with and accept and trust God in that shift and just lean in and follow through.
Spiritual Faith and Personal Transformations
00:10:56
Speaker
And that's what it is, is that that leaning into God and leading into faith and trust
00:11:03
Speaker
in God's purpose and plan for us in our life can feel very lonely. And I think it's more loneliness than depression is what we were feeling. Yeah, it's definitely that perspective that you have. Because like you said, I think both of us have experienced dark depression. And like you said, those were situational depression episodes that either one of us had. But like you said, this was such a
00:11:30
Speaker
like a person, not a personality shift, but almost just like the person that I was, was needed, needed to shift to be who I needed to become for what is planned in my life. And I think it did. It threw me into wanting to, to know more wanting to get
00:11:47
Speaker
you know, into more of my faith and understand, okay, if it's not this, then what is it? And what are you trying to tell me? And I remember I used to sit outside over the summer. I'm a teacher, so we're off during the summer. I used to sit, read my Bible outside and I would just pray and I would just be asking, you know, my life is great. I have all these things. I have a beautiful family. I'm healthy. My family's healthy, but like, why do I feel this need?
00:12:13
Speaker
or this push to to be a different person or to act a different way or why are these things bothering me now like never before did any of this other stuff like you said music people places like why do i feel uneasy and that's exactly you know now looking back almost a year that that is why because i we are being shifted into something
00:12:38
Speaker
that is a better, bigger purpose for us in knowing that we needed to prepare.
Embracing Personal Growth and Opportunities
00:12:43
Speaker
And so I always, you know, I speak to one of my friends about it. It's that isolation is preparing you for something else, whether it's, it doesn't have to be this big shift, but it can be just a mindset shift for you to say, okay,
00:12:57
Speaker
You know those things are not serving me anymore and I need to leave them behind in order to be a better version of myself and so I think at any point in our life that happens and now looking back like I told pam or before we got on the the Podcast today that I wish I would have known that years ago. I went through so much struggle on all of these things
00:13:20
Speaker
depression, anxiety battles that really, they were just shifts in my life. And I just had to level up or shift. And I didn't understand that that's all that was. It wasn't these big moments that I had in my head they were, but really if I would have just grounded myself and really taken that time to open up and say, okay, what do I need to do? Or I'm here, what do I need to do to be used for this way?
00:13:49
Speaker
And so I think that's the main part of this is just, you know, looking at that perspective and making sure that you are looking at it from a brighter side. That's not a negative thing. It's a growth mindset that you have to have in to shift into that and not use it as a, as a negative experience.
MBS Fitco Activewear Launch
00:14:10
Speaker
This episode is brought to you by MBS Fitco. Excitement is in the air at MBS Fitco as we prepare for our upcoming launch. We're introducing a line of premium activewear designed to seamlessly fit into both your workout routines and daily life. Our versatile collection is perfect for your workouts and equally suited for your day-to-day tasks, ensuring you look and feel your best, no matter the occasion.
00:14:32
Speaker
It's not just clothing. It's a commitment to self-care and embracing your best self. Be the first to experience the fusion of style, comfort, and functionality. Subscribe to our VIP list and follow us on Facebook, Instagram, and TikTok for insider information and exclusive perks available only on our launch day. Dive into the show notes for all the links you need.
00:14:52
Speaker
MBS Pit Co. is more than just activewear. It's a lifestyle. Join our community and be part of our exciting journey from day one to celebrate fitness, self-care, and your hero within. Don't just wear it, live it. All right, now let's dive back into this episode.
Grieving Old Selves and Embracing Authenticity
00:15:09
Speaker
I think it is that when we are shifting and when we come to terms with the fact that we are no longer the same person anymore,
00:15:22
Speaker
We go through a period of grief. It's almost like death, right? And rebirth. And I think we went through a time of grieving the loss of the person that we once were or who we thought we wanted or were supposed to be in life.
00:15:42
Speaker
And just like we do with death, right? Is that we grieve and then we come to terms with, and we move on. And I think that's what that is, is that's, that's truly what we were experiencing last summer was it wasn't bouts of depression or anxiety or anything like that. It was just.
00:16:03
Speaker
accepting and grieving the loss of this person who we thought that we were. And then you have to pick up and move on. And sometimes you lose friends because of it, but there are other friends that will come along that will feel more authentic and things will just feel better. And that's when things kind of start to look up
00:16:31
Speaker
you know, it's a whole lot easier to stand alone authentically than to be lonely standing with other people who don't know who you truly are. And I think that was a big realization for me was that over many, many years, there were a lot of people that I hung out with that didn't see
00:16:57
Speaker
They may have thought that they were seeing the real me, but they weren't, you know, because I was hiding that side of me. I was about to say that you hide it almost because you don't want people to judge or question or like you said, you get those comments again.
00:17:14
Speaker
and fear of rejection. Yeah, it's just such like a feeling whenever you can just be authentically you and not, I guess at that point, you just don't care. Like I feel like at this point, I just don't care if people are judging me for the things I do or the way that I think or feel because it's who I am, it's who I've always been. I just feel like I own it more now and I'm able to,
00:17:40
Speaker
to kind of just let that, that part of me free and not feel like I need that. I don't care about the rejection because the people that love me and are there for me are going to take me as I am no matter.
00:17:52
Speaker
what that looks like. And so I think we get caught up in that whenever we're younger and just not being able to really, you know, be that whole authentic person that you are because you feel like you have to fit in certain boxes or be a certain way. Or if you're hanging out with certain people, you have to, to kind of cater to that. But really you're only detrimental to yourself because you're not who God intended you to be. You haven't stepped into that purpose to be fully as you are. Yeah.
00:18:22
Speaker
It causes a lot of fear and doubt and imposter syndrome as well. When you start feeling that shift, it's, gosh, I don't know. I just know that last summer, I, everything just felt very, very heavy.
Spiritual Growth and Self-Understanding
00:18:40
Speaker
And like, and like you said, too, it was just not, I couldn't put my finger on it as to why, because I was like, I have all of these things. I have all this stuff going for me. At that point for me, I had just moved.
00:18:50
Speaker
right? I had just moved into this bigger house with a bigger yard and it was closer and everything was so great, right? And I was just like, why do you feel like this? And that was when I started praying as well and was just like, God, I don't know what it is that you are trying to put on my heart right now, but please, you know, just
00:19:15
Speaker
let me in on it. Like guide me to it because I don't know and I feel it and I just, you know.
00:19:22
Speaker
And so in the closer, we talked about this too, before we jumped on the podcast, the closer we've gotten to God and the more we've grown spiritually, the more and more we feel that pull away from the person that we used to be. It's the more you, again, hang out with or do you start to realize it more, but in a different way, right? It doesn't, it starts to no longer
00:19:52
Speaker
feel like doubt or imposter syndrome or not understanding what's going on, the closer you get to God, the more you realize what it is, right? And that you are, and not just, not just becoming closer to God, but as you just kind of start to realize, the realization starts to come of
00:20:14
Speaker
I am changing and this is me and I haven't been authentic to in myself the more you realize that the more you start to pick out little things because before we may not have realized it before it was just Like oh, well, that's what everybody else is doing. So I'm gonna do it too. And then we just go do right and then it's just whatever water under the bridge and
00:20:35
Speaker
But then it's that feeling of every time you continue to and you're like, yeah, this is it. This is the thing that doesn't feel right. Yeah. You know, you get situations that feel good and you're like, this is where I'm supposed to be, or this is the situations I'm supposed to put myself in. That whole shift is huge. And I feel like that comes with that realization and trusting that God's going to put you in the places you need to be around the people that you need to
Letting Go for Joy and Authenticity
00:21:03
Speaker
be. And,
00:21:04
Speaker
work within your relationships too because even as a as a couple like us growing in that together never in a million years did i think that that was going to happen but it has and i think it's just because i've entrusted that you know the more i pray the more that i dig deeper in it that i am going to be guided and i am going to be used in that direction and
00:21:27
Speaker
it's gonna work within all areas in my life, not just me. As my family, career, all of the things that it's gonna take you to where you need to be if you're following that path that is intended to you and you're not fighting it. Because I feel like a lot of times we do that. We will be hesitant, push back. You don't wanna let go of some of these things that you have done for years, but that is the only way you're gonna grow and change is if you truly just trust in that process and just let go.
00:21:59
Speaker
Yeah, and don't continue to put yourself in situations that don't feel good, right? So it's being able to identify when there's a certain place that you go again or music that you listen to or things that you do or whatever the case may be. When you leave that situation or when that song ends or whenever all these things and you walk away and you're like, that didn't feel good.
00:22:24
Speaker
then it's not for you and it's not meant for you. And so just stop. Or when you hang out with certain people and do certain things or listen to certain music. And when you do and you're like, you just feel so refreshed or rejuvenated and it just, inside you walk away and you're like, man, that just felt really good. Like there's been, like that's the people, that's the places, that's the things that are meant for
Finding Joy in New Experiences
00:22:52
Speaker
you.
00:22:52
Speaker
and where you need to continue to to go towards I you know there's been several experiences that I've had over this last year or so where I've literally walked away in tears because and not sad tears happy tears because
00:23:10
Speaker
It was people or places or things that I went to do or whatever. And I left there and it was things that I've never really done before, right? That was never really something that I did or people that I hung out with or conversations that I had. And when I left, I was literally just in tears because I was like, that felt so good. Yeah.
00:23:36
Speaker
And walking away from something and feeling really good, as opposed to walking away and feeling really bad is a totally different feeling. And the more I continue to put myself around the right people in the right places at the right time, the better it feels. And the more it lets me know that I'm on the right path, and that I am, you know, following
00:24:01
Speaker
God's plan and God's guidance and to my purpose in life and what God put me on this earth to be and to do. Yeah, I definitely feel like it's it's just being it goes all back to being self-aware and just really
00:24:16
Speaker
you know, digging in and knowing that you are I guess it's just those reassurances or just those little moments that kind of click in and you look back and that makes sense or I can see that now and it's almost you're just more aware of the situation. And so you do pick up on those little hints that
00:24:36
Speaker
you know, when different things happen and it connects it to something else that, oh, that that's on the right path. And so I was telling Pam before we got on here that that's happened so often lately that it's just constant reassurance that I'm doing the right thing. I'm in the right place at the right time. And that's what fuels you to continue to just dig deeper and move forward and, and have a certain mindset shift in order to, to take you to where you need to
Shifts as Catalysts for Positive Change
00:25:03
Speaker
be. And,
00:25:03
Speaker
That also I think comes off on you personally. So like that affects people around you. So I know we've had conversations that, that especially when you hear of someone's experience that way. And that's why I think this, this conversation is so important because some people might be struggling with the depression and the anxiety. And so for you too,
00:25:22
Speaker
for us to share and and say that it can be used for a greater good and it it is going to take you but you have to be willing to open your mind to say okay how is this benefiting me how is this going to move me forward and not i feel like it goes back to that perspective not shifting into a negative perspective we have to look at it like okay this is hard this may suck you know this is hard you know don't understand any of it right now but what could this be teaching me
00:25:50
Speaker
And so that's really what the shift happens is you start to look at things totally differently than what you have before.
00:25:59
Speaker
Yeah, yeah, exactly. So I guess at the end of the day, what Mandy and I really came here to say today is that if you're feeling this, if you're experiencing this feeling that something isn't right or that, you know, you feel like you don't fit in with the people or the places or the things that you've always
Embracing Change and Self-Love
00:26:25
Speaker
done. And now it just doesn't feel right anymore.
00:26:28
Speaker
Or you're feeling like there's something different or quirky about you and something's changed. There's nothing wrong with you There's nothing odd or quirky about you Everything that you feel is wrong right now is actually what's very very right and so to lean in and to trust that guidance and whatever it is that you're feeling and to continue to grow through it and
00:26:55
Speaker
and to push forward and just listen. Because when you do and you make those changes and follow through with those feelings of change that you're feeling that you need to have, that is when you go from feeling invisible to feeling visible.
00:27:14
Speaker
from disconnected to connected, from doubting yourself to trusting yourself and craving love from other people and realizing that you are love. So just lean in to the shift if that's what you're feeling and everything will be okay and it'll all turn around and then you'll be able to look back and realize that's what that was.
Closing Remarks and Gratitude
00:27:37
Speaker
So if this episode resonated with you, please, please share it with a friend
00:27:43
Speaker
And also if you have time, leave us a review on our podcast. We would greatly appreciate it. This is just something that we do as a little extra for MBS Fitco. It's not anything that we're monetizing or making money off of. So just leaving us a review is the biggest thank you that you can do for us. And
00:28:03
Speaker
next week we'll have another interview with someone else who is super inspirational and we actually have a little discount thing collaboration that we're doing with her right now as well. So we'll share that next week. And it's a new month. We're in April. We're in the second quarter. So let's make the best of it. And
00:28:28
Speaker
As always, you are strong, you are capable, and you are worthy. We love you and we're endlessly rooting for you. We'll catch you next time.
00:28:39
Speaker
Well, that's a wrap on today's episode of finding my best self. It's been real. It's been fun. We hope you found a piece of your story in ours and feel a little more inspired to chase after your best self. And don't forget to share this episode with someone who needs a little boost today or a good laugh and make sure to subscribe to our podcast. So you never miss an episode. Nothing says owning your confidence, like a new outfit from MBS Fitco. Check out the show notes for the link to shop our luxury athleisure. Go ahead, girl, treat yourself.
00:29:09
Speaker
And if you've got a story to share or a topic you're dying for us to cover, drop us a line. Our email is in the show notes. Just reach out and let's keep the conversation going. So until next time, keep owning your confidence, embracing the chaos. And remember, the best version of you is just an episode away. And again, we love you and we're endlessly rooting for you.