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How The Gronch Stole Christmas
95 Plays11 months ago
Join the Crew as they attempt to stop the Gronch and his companion Mox from stealing Christmas from the village of Wintersburgh!
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Dakota as the PM, DM, GM
Evelyn as Hikaru Hatsumi the Pikachu
Eli as Bruce Flameback the Cyndaquil
Shawn as Sammy Pepperoni the Munchlax
Anirudh as Ahdurin the Mudkip
This story was inspired by How the Grinch Stole Christmas by Dr. Seuss. Obviously. If you didn't know that, then you've been living under a rock.
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Transcript
Introduction and Festive Setup
00:00:00
Speaker
The following episode is non-canon and contains a guest appearance, and a route from Rottescratch, playing Adorn the Mudkip.
00:00:20
Speaker
Ho ho ho! Merry Christmas and welcome to A Path Through Time! I am Santa, your PM, your DM, your GM, and sitting to my left is somebody who believes that honey is the worst thing in the world if you will be put on the naughty list for this one. Tut tut!
Character Introductions and Humor
00:00:38
Speaker
It's me, Evelyn, and to my left is someone who's learning every British accent.
00:00:48
Speaker
Yes, that's me, Eli. As you can see, I can absolutely do a terrible British accent, but across from me is someone who believes that the world is their snowball. That's me. Hey, yeah, I'm Sean. I can lift the whole world and throw it like a snowball. It's not easy. Let me tell you, you gotta really pack it together. It's a big rock in space. I don't know how you really even grab it.
00:01:16
Speaker
Eli, I will say your British accent was just you raising the pitch of your voice. I don't think... Yeah, I have no idea what I was doing there. I thought so too. Yeah, I know. The British accent's like, oh, hello there. And all I heard was, oh, hello there. You're all like, where are you going? Hello there. I'd like a bottle of water, please. A bottle of water? A bottle of water? Would you like a bottle of water with that?
00:01:45
Speaker
Oh, that's actually a much
Into the Blizzard: Adventure Begins
00:01:46
Speaker
better one. Anyway, so yes, to this is our holiday special. If you are listening to this after the fact, Merry Late Christmas, but this is being recorded just around Christmas time and hopefully should release right before Christmas. So Merry Christmas to you if you, or Happy Holidays if you don't celebrate Christmas, I guess.
00:02:11
Speaker
right can somebody give me a christmas themed pokemon move so we can hop on in powdered snow outer snow avalanche Eli what's your vote blizzard blizzard all right because uh glaceon can learn blizzard it's one of my favorite moves uh we are going to blizzard on in and how fitting that is because you guys are starting in the middle of a blizzard
00:02:39
Speaker
As you guys are walking through a lizard, you guys, cold snow under your feet, you see shimmering lights ahead of you in the beginnings of a town. You guys are in the ice world, or so it has been named.
00:02:54
Speaker
you
Quest Initiation and New Allies
00:02:55
Speaker
see well lights it's cold you guys want to get out of the cold so towards the town you go as you guys get closer and closer to this town you guys hear a cry cry from the dark the blizzard the i think the cold is getting to me guys uh as you guys hear from the town you hear oh help if only four adventurers would save me from my perils
00:03:24
Speaker
And you hear this voice coming from one of the buildings to your left as you are entering the town. Four adventurers? That's weirdly specific. Wait, does that mean Walter came along too? Walter, are you here? Walter looks at you in waves. Oh hey buddy, I didn't see you there. Why are you hiding behind your car door like that?
00:03:46
Speaker
I don't know. I mean, it's cold. It hurts to open my mouth. So I don't know. Let's get inside. Like, good grief. It's way too cold out here. And he points to a church in the distance. Oh, yeah. It must just be my thick fat. Keep me warm. Oh, yeah. Montracs does have thick fat. We are for adventure, so we should probably try to help out at least.
00:04:08
Speaker
Okay, as you guys get closer to the town, you guys can see that the voice is coming from the church itself. Sitting on the stoop of the church is a Lucario. It's a Lucario, and he looks at you guys, tears in his eyes, and he's like, oh, wonderful! I forget what voice I had before! For adventurers! Walter, do you know this guy?
00:04:32
Speaker
Walter looks at him, he's like, I don't think so? No? I mean, no, the only Lucario I know is my mom and she's at home, hopefully. So everything... Yeah, I don't
Mystery of the Missing Bell
00:04:48
Speaker
know any other Lucarios. Ah, okay.
00:04:53
Speaker
And the Lucario gestures to you for he's like, oh, perfect for adventurers. I seem to have completely lost my British accent. I think I had a few minutes ago. Anyway, why don't you guys come aside and have a chat with me? Do you think he's going to second puberty too? Not second puberty again.
00:05:17
Speaker
I don't know which episode that was in, but I think that was in an episode that's gonna be unreleased of the release of this episode. Episode 6. It's in the subway station. Oh, okay. Well, in that case, yeah, that'll be unreleased by now. I take it you guys are heading into the church. Yeah? Yeah. Forgot to mention it, but you guys walked through. You guys see a sign that says, welcome to Wintersburg.
00:05:45
Speaker
Oh, Wintersburg. Wintersburg. Wintersburg. To give the town a name. Wintersburg. Wait, is the sign on the church or are we passing it on our way to the church? No, you guys pass it on the way into the town. Oh, Wintersburg? Yes. Yes. Yes. B-U-R-D. Burg. Yeah.
Confronting the Grunch: A Holiday Villain
00:06:06
Speaker
He has the door open and he is gesturing you guys inside with the door open. Yeah, so we go in. OK.
00:06:16
Speaker
all right so uh walter heard of all of you guys and he dashes into the warmth uh and lukario looks at you guys and he's like oh hello there are you
00:06:29
Speaker
i mean i i'm in a bit of a state right now uh you you see uh uh and uh as he's stuttering you guys look around and um sitting in one of the pews is a mud chip that is staring at you guys and uh she did Lucario uh says uh i'm gonna have myself my name is
00:06:53
Speaker
Uh, my name is Roger, and this over here is Adurin. Uh, say hi Adurin. Hey, how's it going? Uh, we seem to have a bit of a problem here. Uh, you know how tomorrow is Christmas Day, right? Yeah. Yeah.
00:07:14
Speaker
Well, we have a little bit of a predicament. You see, in this town we have a little bit of a tradition where every Christmas day at 7am we ring the bell to let people know that Christmas is around.
00:07:30
Speaker
Unfortunately the bell is missing and he points up into the ceiling of the church where you can see a gigantic hook without a bell and you can see like flashing dotted lines as if something was supposed to be there.
00:07:49
Speaker
i'm sorry i just realized what you meant by that i do not believe so if so i feel very sorry for it but no it is not a pokemon as far as i can tell it has never said anything to me so
00:08:08
Speaker
I'm sorry. It has never said anything to me. Hey, how's it going down there? I'm sorry. It feels good to get back into the swing of things.
00:08:27
Speaker
I think it's just smart I guess to say that no, it is not a Pokemon, but me and Durin here have been chatting and we have come to the conclusion that we need four brave adventurers to go out and find the Belfast because without this bell, also, I have turned very old for some reason.
00:08:53
Speaker
I think you started out old, got young, and then got old again. Strange how that works. Oh no, another character with a shapeshifting accent? Guys, guys, I told you, he took out second puberty. That's all it is. It's just really old puberty. Anyways, we're four adventurers. We've been on a lot of adventures. We've done a lot of things. I'd tell you about it. It'll take you a long time.
00:09:18
Speaker
What is it that you need from us? Well, we need some money to go find the bell for us. One, before Christmas, and two, before I die of old age. It's a real problem. It's honestly a little concerning. I think his age 10 years and 10 minutes, so... How did you lose this bell in the first place?
00:09:47
Speaker
I'm sorry, I'm still getting this. I'm still trying to deal with this. Bruce has got a point. Who would just come and steal a bell? Dude, do you think somebody stole it? Well, we have our suspicions, but we don't have any evidence. So that's what we need you guys to discover. Someone stole it. I mean, nothing. We have... Oh, that's not suspicious or nothing. Well, there's an old... Yes, the Pikachu. Speak. Question.
00:10:13
Speaker
Yeah, I'm, I'm Hikaru. Nice, nice to meet you. Oh, nice to meet you. I am Roger. Nice to meet you, Roger. Um, maybe, maybe if we hear a little bit about this spell, we can figure out if any, who, if anybody might have had a motivate, a motive to steal it.
00:10:33
Speaker
Oh well, we have a suspect, but yes, I can tell you about this bell. It is a big yellow bell the size of the Liberty Bell. I don't think that's a thing. Like that place where Victini was? Or is that in a different universe? I don't know what that is.
00:10:54
Speaker
Anywho, it is a very large bell, about as tall as I am. And he is, if I remember right, Lucario's are like four and a half feet tall.
00:11:04
Speaker
They're surprisingly shorter than you'd expect, but yes. Yeah, they are. So yeah, he's like, but yes, it must be very difficult to steal because it weighs several hundred pounds and would be incredibly hard to get out of here without you know, causing some sort of large racket.
00:11:25
Speaker
But I have my suspicions and I better get this up because I could feel old age taking over every bone in my body. Who made it? I have no clue.
00:11:44
Speaker
But I can tell you my suspicions is that the old coot who lives on top of that mountain. And he points out one of the windows where you can see a large snowy mountain. And you can see a ski lift going up the top of it.
00:12:00
Speaker
There is an old, uh, meowscarada that lives up there, that goes by the name The Graunch. And he hates Christmas! He will do anything to ruin Christmas, and it seems like something up his alley. The Graunch? Why does that sound so familiar? I could not tell you, for I am not you! Someone that hates Christmas, that sounds like their heart is two sizes too small.
00:12:27
Speaker
Ah, you could say that. I think they also have a hurtier companion that pulls around a sleigh to doing his evil deeds. His name is Mox.
00:12:40
Speaker
mox mox mox mox mox mox mox mox mox mox mox mox mox mox mox mox mox mox mox mox mox mox mox mox mox mox mox mox mox mox mox mox mox mox mox mox mox mox mox mox mox mox mox mox mox mox mox mox mox mox mox mox mox mox mox mox mox mox mox mox mox mox mox mox mox mox mox mox mox mox mox mox mox mox mox mox mox mox mox mox mox mox mox mox mox mox mox mox mox mox mox mox mox mox mox mox mox mox mox mox mox mox mox mox mox mox mox mox mox mox mox mox
00:13:04
Speaker
Wintersburg, that's the name of this town. I seem to be getting dementia. All right, all right, Roger. So what you're saying is you want us to check out this Grunch? Yes, if you could go up the mountain and check out the Grunch, I will... I will send a door in here with you to keep an eye on you and help, I guess.
00:13:33
Speaker
I'm gonna go lay down and possibly die. I will stay alive at least until Christmas. My bones are turning to dust as we speak. I don't know how long I will have. Roger, you can't die yet. Tomorrow's Christmas. Don't you have a family? Grandchildren?
00:13:58
Speaker
Great grandchildren. Spaghetti. Oh, yes. I have one child. He is two years old. He was born just a couple years ago. That's usually how two years old's go. I realize that as I said that. I love this character, by the way. There's so much fun here. Didn't you have some weird time stuff go on with you lately?
00:14:26
Speaker
I don't know. I have a feeling this bell has been stopping me from aging for some reason. I just know it. I don't know. Anyhow, I'm gonna go lay down and disintegrate. I will see you guys later. I hope you do it, Roger. We'll be right back. Okay. Okay.
00:14:57
Speaker
And he hobbles off, he can see dust falling off of him as he speaks. And Adorin is standing there staring at you guys, looking, how does Adorin look?
00:15:11
Speaker
The expression on Adurin's face right now is, I've dealt with this every single day for the past 10 years. He just hasn't had his coffee. Give the fellow some coffee, he's going to turn back into the regular 55-year-old that he is. But until then, dust falls off. Are we sure he's not Palestine? Are there coffee machines in here?
00:15:34
Speaker
uh yes you can see three coffee machines sitting on a table on the left side i think i think i just go like i'll be with you in a second and then i just go make a cup of coffee like all right
00:15:43
Speaker
Let's see, one of these, two of these, okay. Before you pass away in a dusty demise, drink this, I'ma head out with them. Adios. Okay, roll me a performance to see how well the coffee is. Oh, brother. Am I going by normal Mudkip stats? I'm trying to find it, it's cute. It's cute.
00:16:07
Speaker
Like bonus is not that I assume we're standard water type. I if you if you added your Your attributes for one second. Let me see attributes are water water cute is plus one. So yeah, that'd be d20 plus one Alright, let's see what we got here. Oh
00:16:26
Speaker
Please tell me as a player my roles are better than as a GM. The answer is no, I rolled a six. This coffee is like either black or non-existent. It is perfectly black. Oh great, I might kill him. So as you hand in, you guys can see him. You should check and see if he likes black coffee. He might like his coffee black.
00:16:51
Speaker
The man is old he prefers his coffee without the coffee in it. So the fact that this is black is not a great sign That's what I should have done but I decided to give him coffee today milk with like ground up Oreos in it so it looks like coffee I
00:17:08
Speaker
As he starts taking sips of coffee, which I have coffee in, that's me actually, he takes a sip of the coffee and it makes him his, not his metabolism, his blood, his heart rate starts going up and it seems to be accelerating the growth of his demise. He is shedding dust everywhere.
00:17:32
Speaker
And that's our cue. Okay guys, let's go real quick Nothing No, no, let's just get out of here this seems oddly familiar for some reason We're gonna we're gonna throw a citrus berry at him on our way out. Do you guys have?
00:17:58
Speaker
Okay, if you're gonna I think that's another performance roll. Oh, yeah, that would be cute. Oh, well Here we go, you know, I got a three minus two You throw this berry and it lands with a splat on one of the pews You being like one at one foot call cannot throw very far Bruce you got tiny newborns. What do you can try that? Oh
00:18:27
Speaker
sorry i think at this point i'm trying to push everybody out of the room okay so everybody is outside of the church it is cold outside um the cold hits your faces you are now cold that's how cold works it's a blizzard uh around you you can see a bunch of stuff through the blizzard you can see a shop you can see
00:18:48
Speaker
That's like the only thing this town has it's a general shop So there's a general shop and then there's a sign that says get out because it's Windowsburg and nobody comes here except to live here. So Except to live here I'm assuming we're gonna go up that mountain and There might be wild Pokemon there. So we should We should stock up before we go That sounds like a good idea and as you enter in
00:19:18
Speaker
the general story, you see a Kangaskhan like the usual up at the shop and you can see tons of berries and well, there's no potions, I guess. There's a bunch of berries, more berries, some items, basically anything you can imagine that a basic shop would have is in this shop. The Kangaskhan looks at it and he was like, oh, hello there. We rarely ever get any visitors. You're new here, aren't you? Yeah, we're new here. You sure just got into it?
00:19:45
Speaker
Oh, as long as you're not up to anything nefarious, our shop is open to you. Uh, we have berries, more berries. Basically anything a basic shop would have is right here. Any gestures in front of them. Ooh. Um, could I, could I buy a Reviver Seed? Uh, yes. Let me pull up my sheet and see how much a Reviver Seed is. Uh... Yeah, that, I think that checks out. That'd be a good idea to have a Sheet with all your prices on it.
00:20:14
Speaker
Yes, it is very handy. Can I ask you a blast seed while you're at it? A blast seed. Well, first the Reviver seed is 800 poke a piece and a blast seed. That will bring you to 250 poke a piece. All right. Could we get some extra citrus berries and maybe... What's the berry that that lets you not freeze?
00:20:52
Speaker
I am not seeing... I don't know, what was the first barrier you guys asked for before? Aspir... Citrus. Nothing. Citrus. Why is Citrus not... Why is Citrus not showing up? Citrus. You could find... How much was it? 150? 150. Citrus, Citrus, where's the Citrus Berry? I can't find it. It's a... Citrus Berries are gonna... I'm just gonna say 200. Okay, because it's gonna take me decades to look at this list.
00:21:05
Speaker
I do believe that's an aspyr berry? Miyazujin questioning that? Yes.
00:21:17
Speaker
Um, could I have a citrus berry, a reviver seed, and an asp bear berry? Alright, that'll be 1,200. Okay. Yes, Sean, what is your question? Should we change our money or does it not matter?
00:21:35
Speaker
Keep track of this separately. I have not mentioned this before, but this is non-canon, so you guys can keep track of it. Take whatever total you have right now, keep a separate track for this episode specifically, and you'll revert back after the, when we get back to our regular episodes. Yeah, I just made a copy of my character sheet. Okay, that works.
00:21:57
Speaker
Okay, so technically, this is non-canon, then just dump all your money. Go all out. I'd like to buy a power bank. Like it doesn't matter. Yeah. Yes. That will be my advice. All right. Can I buy the elemental bell? You cannot. Let me see. He pulls out an elemental bell. So that'll be nine thousand. OK. Guys, I've solved our problems. Oh, hell yeah.
00:22:24
Speaker
While he is a small fortune from everybody. Yes, he pulls out an actual elemental bell and places there on the table That will be nice. That was some places where she can afford it. Yeah, I mean I've got 5,000 poke on me I've changed my mind. This is now 90,000 poke What does a
00:22:48
Speaker
What would a special band do for me? Or how? A special band, I think it's plus eight to special. Okay. It's, uh, plus your base, whatever your base special attack is, you add that. Okay. Um, I wonder if there's like a, uh, let me just, let me just look at the items list. Uh, when held special attack increases by base stats. So I think, uh, whatever your base stats are, add that.
00:23:16
Speaker
Can answer is that how special bands work? No, I'm pretty I'm good on how on how special bands work, but um How much does one cost? He pulls out a ribbon from underneath the desk. He says this special bender. Here's one for five thousand. Okay That's a bit too much How about let me see Can I buy a Gin's bottle
00:23:46
Speaker
Oh, what now? Let's have a bottle of gin. Go for it. Go for it. Where the heck did I see this? I just had it. All right. I'll have, um, yeah, I'll have, uh, two Reviver seeds, one citrus berry and, um, an Asperger berry and a yellow gummy.
00:24:20
Speaker
You know what I don't think you know what guys I don't think I actually want to buy any items because something inside of me says this doesn't really matter if I have items or not This might not be cannon whatever that means All right. So he the Genghis Khan Genghis Khan Kangus Khan. Let's see. Oh, no Genghis he transforms into Genghis Khan. No, the story got a lot more dark on
00:24:45
Speaker
Kangaskhan says, you know what? I don't feel like tracking money anymore. All of that will cost you 1, uh, 1,200 poke. Alright, 1,200. Here you go.
00:24:56
Speaker
and he and he takes her 1200 and he hands you whatever items you just asked for because I've already forgot. I already forgot with oh I ordered a yellow I bought a yellow gummy right um yeah yellow gummy reviver seat two reviver seats asp here yes I'm glad you remember yeah I'm also gonna buy a couple citrus berries yeah
00:25:19
Speaker
All right, I will keep track of money for this because that is 800 apiece. And your friend says that you are rich so I can squeeze more money out of you. That's 800 apiece. OK, so I'll buy two citrus berries. That's true. Karu kind of like robbed the shopkeeper. Not a lot. Yeah, I know. That's what I'm thinking. I'm pretty sure what she grabbed was worth like five thousand. Pretty much like the most expensive items. Right.
00:25:47
Speaker
So she gave him a lot of money, so I mean, he made a profit. Possibly. Depends on how much he paid for those items. He didn't get them for free. All right, and he takes your 1600, gives you two citrus berries. Is there anything else I can help you guys with? No, thank you. We're good. Do you have any crazy special super mega awesome items back there in the back?
00:26:12
Speaker
uh yeah he pulls out an elemental bell uh this is going for 90 000 poke guys it's the bell wait that's the bell i think we found it guys it's the bell it's right there hold on one second i didn't even think about this that actually makes so much sense too but that was not my intention uh you know what i have changed my mind this is 900 000 poke
00:26:41
Speaker
Dang, guys, we gotta do a lot of grinding here. Do you need any help around the shop? I'm sure Walter could just stay here and help you in exchange for the bell. Okay, we gotta figure out how to get... Let me do some math. If you want... If you want to work your debt off with this elemental bell, and he slaps the bell, it'll cost you about 65 years of work. Guys, it's okay. I'm non-canon. I can afford it. It's just straight up a million poke.
00:27:13
Speaker
I think we should get we gotta get going. We gotta go see the garage The garage are you gonna try and buy it Aaron? No, there's no but I didn't bother giving myself money or items at this point. I'm going in blind. Okay. I was gonna say if you I was gonna have a be like and you give all your money to the shopkeeper and it's like two poke
00:27:35
Speaker
Here we go. Two! This is all I got. No, it's two. It's just two. Two. Here I go. Straight up, two with my pockets. I don't even know how this got here. We're in snow land. Okay, so I take it you guys are heading outside then. After all your shopping is done. Yeah. We are. And now that we're leaving the shop, I'm gonna say that the normal selling price of citrus berries is 4,000 fauquet.
00:28:02
Speaker
wait is that what if i see said that i received a great honor i was out when i was looking at where citrus otherwise i'm coming up uh... it's just kind of that man there it is citrus berries oh my god it's four thousand a piece good group okay yet but we've already i think that i thought about him making a profit
00:28:30
Speaker
Yep, he is perfectly content with that. I think I got, yeah, I got the citrus berry and the revive received mixed up. So, oh wow.
00:28:38
Speaker
As you guys head out of town, you guys very cold head towards the mountain. It takes a couple hours, but as you guys get there, uh, you are, are you guys heading? I take it. You guys are heading to the mountain, but as you guys are there, you see two options before you. You see a cave in the side of the mountain and you see a ski lift that does not currently seem to be running. Let's, uh, is it, is the seat close to the ground? Let's at least check out the ski lift of the ski lift.
00:29:09
Speaker
Uh, the ski lift seat is, yes, I'm going to say it's already at the return point. Okay. Uh, Sammy is going to sit on the ski lift. Okay. You guys take another hour to walk to the scale of first. Um, and once you guys get there, Sammy hops up on and it is not currently running. And so I think we got to figure out how we can get this thing running. We can figure out, maybe we can find out something about the ski lift.
00:29:37
Speaker
Are you guys perchance investigating the scale lift? Yeah. Perchance. I mean, we did a lot of walking. Sami needs a break. Perchance. You guys need to perchance roll, perchance investigation. I'm going to shut up. Whoever's investigating a roll investigation. That would be me. Which is a smart roll. I never remember these. Nat 20. I got a 20.
00:30:05
Speaker
What's that thing? Hang on. He's hitting a 9 plus 1 is 10. Smart. Oh, right. I have no smart. 17. Flat. 17? What about you, Ennard? Do you want me to roll? You're with the party, sure. I'm even going to have Walter roll. I just remember he's there. I got a 9 plus 1 at 10, and it seems the answer is no. My GM rolls still show up here. So that's... This reminds me of the Zorroark battle. This reminds me of every battle.
00:30:34
Speaker
So, Wilter rolled a 12, and it was Hikaru that rolled a nat 20, er, sorry, Evelyn that rolled a nat 20, right? Right. So as you take a look at this thing, you can see there is a fuse box that is completely coated in a block of ice, and a note on it saying out of order. Out of order. Hey, you think I can melt that block of ice with an ember? Perchance. Bruce, you do an ember, and then Hikaru, you do a nice little thunder shock on it.
00:31:05
Speaker
And I'll just sit here on the nice... I'm a little worried we might like, I don't know, set the thing on fire or melt it, melt the cables. I mean, it's a block of ice with metal behind it, right? It's got to have a pretty high melting point, right? I know it was a long time ago, but the one time you tried to set something on fire, it didn't go too well. You guys are still hanging that on me. That was not my fault in any way, shape or form. That was ages ago.
00:31:35
Speaker
Yeah, let's put that behind us. Sorry, I just love Sammy's subtle tones when you kill the man. Yeah, let's keep that in the rearview mirror. Whatever that is. Today's a new day. We've had several new days since then. My embers have gotten so much better. We're going to find out.
00:32:03
Speaker
That's a good way to look at it. Well, I got a nine, so yes they have. It's better than you're not one, I think it was before. Okay, so with a nine ember, you do melt it partially. You smack this thing with an ember, fire shoots out of your mouth, hits the block of ice, and it starts dripping and now it is half melted and there are icicles on the bottom of the ice block because of the dripping water.
00:32:31
Speaker
Can I lick the dripping water? Yeah, you can. Let me use Quick Attack on it. Let's see if I can break the ice. Okay, sure. Roll me a Quick Attack. Alright. 12.
00:32:52
Speaker
12 okay and with a 12 you back up you smash your head into this block of ice and it starts to crack but it does not actually shatter although there is visible cracks Sammy I think you should try and tackle that maybe you can shatter that ice all right that sounds like a good idea let me get out my die I mean what
00:33:19
Speaker
I'm just imagining one choice pulling out a d20 out of his fur. He just has a bunch of secret stuff in his fur. Do I need to roll accuracy? I don't know. It's not going anywhere. No, I'm not having you guys roll accuracy for this. You guys have a target that's like two inches in front of you. I need a d8. Okay.
00:33:45
Speaker
Sorry, I mean you guys are rolling accuracy. You guys are not rolling damage. Yeah, this is whether or not you succeed Yeah, that's what I meant. Sorry. Yeah, I Think I have this backwards, but we're gonna roll with it. It doesn't matter Well, should I roll accuracy? Just me a d20 and I'd seem to have gotten it backwards, but we're just gonna roll with it. Oh
00:34:07
Speaker
I got a 5. Alright with a 5 you attempt to tackle this block of ice and Sammy being the big sphere he is just bounces right off this block of ice and falls straight onto his back. Brucey I don't think I can get traction on the ice.
00:34:22
Speaker
Walter, who I just remembered is there, steps up to the ice block and attempts to go for a metal claw, because that's something he has, and he is going to roll a d20, which I do not currently have pulled up. He gets a 4, so he goes for it, but he forgets to actually pull out his metal claw, and he just punches the ice block, but it does no damage, and literally nothing happens. That's kind of how I imagine a metal claw works.
00:34:52
Speaker
Yeah, you do. Do you have anything you can help us out with here? I can try, sure. I am going to attempt a Rock Smash, which is something that Mudkip can learn recently that I'm very happy about. There you go. Nice. I think it's a Gen 9 thing, because this moveset looks dramatically different than the one I'm used to. Anyway, Rock Smash. Just a flat D20.
00:35:18
Speaker
Oh my gosh, it's a big number. 15. That's the first one I've gotten since before the show existed. With a 15, you step back, you aim a bunch of rocks, and the ice block smashes open, revealing a metal box. As you guys step up to the box, you guys can see it's, well, a metal box. It's got hinges, a door, and it's also got a metal padlock with no key in sight. It is very solid.
00:35:49
Speaker
Is there a combination? No, it requires a key. Okay. No key. Maybe we should have bought a key at the shop. Let me buy a scale up key. Survey salvos everywhere. Just to confirm before we go doing something potentially drastic, would I have the key? Is that a possibility? You check your inventory and you do not have a key.
00:36:17
Speaker
Okay, just to conclude. Okay, we don't have them again. Wow, I was here. Can we look on the, if there's any words on the box to see if who might have the key? Uh, sure. The box says fuse box. That's all it says. Fuse box? Fuse box, yes. I am not sure I want to cut open the lock or have us cut open the lock.
00:36:46
Speaker
Should we investigate the area? See if we can find it somewhere around here. Is the ski lift the only option? Can we walk? Is the ski lift important? What's the cave? Yeah, I forgot if there was another option. I just want to know to the ski lift. Yes, did you guys have the option of going up the ski lift or going through the cave? Cave it is. Cave. Are you guys giving up on the ski lift? I got fired. I can light up a cave.
00:37:15
Speaker
is adoring agreeing with us yeah i agree okay uh you guys abandoned the ski lift uh i want somebody to roll me perception but only one person 17 all right you live rolled a 17 as you guys get 17
00:37:36
Speaker
Okay, as you guys I guess I didn't really have to have one person on this but it's whatever as long as somebody will perception as you guys enter this cave you guys can I guess Sammy sees a bunch of signs partially covered in snow because of the blizzard that say keep out it do not enter and a bunch of signs like that there's like 15 of these signs and
00:38:02
Speaker
hey guys there's a bunch of signs that say keep out do not enter a bunch of signs like that there's about 15 of them let's stop let's go brush the snow off of them oh yeah okay as you go up and brush off one of the signs that says keep out do not enter that's it there wasn't any more words
00:38:22
Speaker
The other one says, keep out, do not enter. I mean it. It's you brush off another sign. It says, how many signs are you going to read? Just keep out. Sounds like you should get in here and figure out this person. I'm glad you guys are getting the right message from these signs.
00:38:45
Speaker
Yeah, I'm pretty sure we need to, we need to invest, we need to go in here and see. These signs are telling us to get in here. Absolutely. No, nobody puts enough 15 cheap out signs in one piece. These signs can't tell me what to do. Are you guys trying to deceive, are you trying to deceive everyone? Or are you just sarcastically making everyone a perimeter? No, I'm just saying, I don't think, I don't think anybody's watching us. Yeah, I think all of us are like, hey, let's go inside.
00:39:16
Speaker
Hello everyone, I am Dakota, here to thank you for listening to our episode. Our show comes out every other week, Sunday morning. Go follow us on Instagram at PMDPathThroughTime, or at Twitter at PMDPathThroughTime, spelled with a U. In our Discord, where you can receive updates on the show, talk to us, give us ideas, such as the question of the episode submissions. However, we're not doing question of the episode this week because it is a Christmas episode. To round us off, let's thank our music producers.
00:39:45
Speaker
Thank you for Stop Thief from Pokémon Super Mystery Dungeon. Escape Through the Snow from Pokémon Mystery Dungeon Rescue Team DX. Dark Ice Mountain from Pokémon Mystery Dungeon Explorers of Sky. Kecleon Shop from Pokémon Mystery Dungeon Rescue Team DX. Nobel City from Pokémon Brilliant Diamond and Shining Pearl. Chester from Pokémon Sword and Shield.
00:40:08
Speaker
Emotion from Pokemon Black and White Battle Wild Pokemon Unova Remastered by Azim Rising Fear But It's Christmas by Evelyn Sierra And of course, as always, Pokemon Center theme lo-fi remix by Glitch X City Alright, as you guys head inside, I need you guys to pull out your dice because this is a dungeon!
00:40:32
Speaker
What size do we need? Okay, as you guys enter this cave, a big text screen pops up that says, it's a camera full of ice, that's the name of this dungeon. I don't really care about the name of this dungeon. And you guys see in front of you a large hallway that leads straight. Wow, that's a long dungeon name. And I need something. It really is. And as the text fades away from your vision, it was very strange. I need somebody to roam your D10.
00:41:01
Speaker
I'll do it. That's this one, right? Okay. It's one of ten numbers on our last iChat. If it grew a new number, we have a problem. From zero to one. I'm a little one. Okay, and with one, you take one singular step forwards, and you take one single step forward, and there is a gigantic pile of gold at your feet, and there is 650 poke. Whoa! 650 poke, going right up.
00:41:30
Speaker
I rolled a nat 20 on the encounter table. We can split that five ways and come up with something. I believe that is... Do we each get six fifty or do we split it? One thirty would be split. I think that's a one thirty. We get one thirty each.
00:41:55
Speaker
Okay, so yeah, you guys can split that up. What you guys see in front of you is a long straight hallway. Nothing has changed because you have taken one singular step. Somebody else, roll the 10. Nice. Alright, let me count this out. You take two steps forward and to your right you can see Branson hallway and you also see the pathway continuing forwards.
00:42:18
Speaker
So three paths? There are two paths. You can continue straight. Well, I guess there are three paths. You can turn right or you can head back and exit the dungeon. I say we keep going forward. I vote forward. Yeah. Forward we go. All right. Forward you go. One, two, three, four, five, six, seven, eight. You guys can see approximately what you assume is two steps in front of you in large room, but you are not quite there yet.
00:42:48
Speaker
And it is encounter table time what you but as as You guys are looking into this room. You hear a secret door open beside you and the wall starts shaking and a little Pokemon comes out and it's a tiny little shaking snover and He said oh how well are you are including on my space? I have to battle you now And she charges at you
00:43:18
Speaker
Hey, hey, no, I like okay. I think that's a bit of another exaggeration, but all right All right. I need you guys to roll. I Need you guys to roll a initiative. Geez, I forgot my words. You're in my space for me Guess who goes last like always
00:43:40
Speaker
Well, all right d12, okay, I don't have my thoughts hold up the one second so I can keep track of the You might not be going last this time because I rolled a two and my d9 I also rolled a two Is there a reason I can't edit one second Yes, I would like to edit my own document. Thank you
00:44:07
Speaker
Thank you. Okay. I don't know what was going on. Apparently so. I don't know. I accidentally answered. That's fine. All right. What was everyone's initiative? I got nine. All right. Nine. Two. All right. Bruce got a two. Two. All right. And Sammy got a two. I will have you guys re-rule in just a second. What about a four?
00:44:32
Speaker
For oops, that's a d20. I don't remember Walter speed is And he rolls a seven he won't actually be going first What so far? Well, he'll beat me. I can't rely on this. Oh, no, he called out a nine. Sorry, right? I need Bruce and Sammy to reveal a six. I Got a five
00:44:57
Speaker
All right, so the order is Hikaru, Walter, Bruce, Sammy, Adora, which is funny because it's, oh no, if Hikaru would have been 8, 7, 6, 5, 4. Okay, so, Hikaru, you are up. This little Pokemon is just waddling towards the group, very slowly, very feebly. I'm gonna start with a quick attack. All right, roll accuracy and move. I'm gonna do a thunder smash.
00:45:27
Speaker
14. That beats a 6. That does in fact beat a 6, plus a check. 14 is in fact greater than 6. I'm glad you've become a mathematician. I used to quick attack, right? Okay. Yes. Yes. Okay. So damage dice, 1d8 plus 6, plus my attack. 2 plus 6 is 8, plus my attack, which is 8. 16.
00:45:56
Speaker
Alright, you go to smack this thing in the face with a quick attack and it falls over and knocked out cold. It was a level 1 snover. I didn't think this battle would be long but I thought it would be longer than a turn. You basically just barely tapped it and it just fell over and knocked out cold. That poor guy. I only gave it 5 HP. What? That's so cruel.
00:46:23
Speaker
Wait, hold on, how much damage did you do? Hold on, wait, how much damage did you do? 16 minus its defense. Hold on, I need to actually generate a Snover because you very well might have just caused the first death. Is the end up saves? I thought the first time you said it was Snover. Sorry, I said Snover, I meant Snoverunt. You said Snoverunt. Okay.
00:46:48
Speaker
I meant snow, that's the Pokemon I had in my mind. Sorry. You said snow run? Editor, put in the words of the word of me saying snow run over every time I say snowber. I'm sure that won't cause you a million days. I, I will try. I seriously doubt you're going to do that. It's a ditto that turned into a snowber and then became a snow run. Okay, give me one second. I just had to create a copy of Walter sheet. Snow run.
00:47:16
Speaker
and it is level one it has a defense of oh actually it's a defense of 11 you knocked it out perfectly you did not in fact cause it to be murdered but you did knock it out perfectly oh okay good thanks yeah i was just giving because the way i was having it i was just beefing all of its stats five instead of generating an entirely new character since it was level one so
00:47:40
Speaker
I was giving you five HP. Okay. Anywho, uh, you guys have one and you guys have each gained. I'm going to say just one experience. Whoa. I don't think you guys really need to write it down because you guys are not going to level up this one shot. I'm not keeping track of that. No. Yeah. I wouldn't recommend one XP. Why? That's enough for me to level up. Cause I totally didn't set myself up and I'm kidding.
00:48:03
Speaker
Walter though, he leveled up so many times. Hey, that levels up Mudkip to level 16. Adurin starts evolving! Congratulations, you learned Hydra Bob straight. Oh my goodness. You learned you leveled up straight from a Mudkip all the way to a Swampert. Mega Swampert with Shiny.
00:48:29
Speaker
you went from a you went from a regular mug tip to a mega shiny I don't think that's how that works okay so I need somebody else to roll me a d10 to remind you you guys are two spaces away from a large room for
00:48:48
Speaker
Okay, four. You guys moved for two spaces and you can look into this room. It is a five by seven room. You can see a doorway directly across the room. A doorway to your left. Yes, left, sorry. I'm looking at the map backwards. It is a few spaces to your left across the room. And yeah, those two ones. The one across the room, the one to your left. You can see a Pokemon sleeping in the bottom left corner. Bottom right corner.
00:49:17
Speaker
Which is five spaces away from you. Well, four, I guess. Are there any items? Um, not in sight, no. Well, that guy looks pretty comfy over there. We should probably not make him up. It is, uh, an Eren. It looks extremely beaten up. Oh, no, not bad, Eren. It's A, A, Ron. Maybe we can go over and help it if it needs help.
00:49:46
Speaker
Are you going to try doing that? It will take a... It will take a... Wait, hold on. You guys roll four. You guys have two spaces left to move somewhere. Yeah, let's move to the right toward it. Is Hikaru splitting from the group? Yeah, I'm going to split from the group. Okay, now you're going to have to roll for yourself. Is anyone else going with Hikaru? No. I don't think so. Alright. And Arid, what are you doing?
00:50:15
Speaker
uh but uh i think i i think i would follow okay so we got adorn and hikaru moving two spaces to the right and the rest of the group what are you guys doing accordingly i guess i'll follow yeah all right sammy's forward all right i guess everyone's i i'd say it would be like uh pikaru just sort of splits off real fast from the group while we kept having
00:50:43
Speaker
different way okay I guess if it's not like that we'll all be going
00:50:49
Speaker
Well, if he was sleeping, I didn't want to bother him. As a munchlax, I know how important that is. As a munchlax. You guys are now one space away from being adjacent to it. Take those two step forward and nothing happens. Someone else, roll me. Actually, you guys are going to wake up this Eren, right? So there's no need to roll it, because all you have to do is roll one or higher. Yeah. If you guys wish to wake the Eren up, no dice rolls in there. It's only one space. I'll walk up to it.
00:51:19
Speaker
Okay, so Hikaru, because you walked up to it first, it will automatically put you in first place for this initiative. It will wake up, and it is extremely angry that you just woke it up. It already has a black eye, and it seemingly... Actually, no, roll me in sight. What did I say? Roll me in sight. What is insight?
00:51:40
Speaker
i'm looking that right now i always forget these because i'm is it beauty okay yeah it is beauty i have a plus two modifier so oh 19 plus two 21 uh this aaron recognizes you he looks at you and he's like
00:52:03
Speaker
He looks at you and he's like, you. I came here to escape you. What are you doing here? I thought if I went to the most remote place on this planet, I would finally be free from you. This is what, the third time you've beaten me up, I think? I don't even remember anymore. You caused me brain damage. I will kill you once and for all. And he charges you.
00:52:29
Speaker
We roll initiative and Hikaru automatically gets first on the first turn, but we'll have to roll initiative afterwards. I think I just pull one of the others off to the side. Probably not Hikaru, just either Eli or Sammy and just kind of pull them and be like, do you guys have like history or something?
00:52:56
Speaker
Riolu there. Walter beat him up real bad in our final exam for our battle class. And yeah, I guess we've, I guess we beat him up a few more times since then. I don't know why. To give a brief, actually, have brief little history because there is one thing you've forgotten. I want to see Bruce flip remember that. Bruce ain't remembering nothing.
00:53:23
Speaker
I got a neck one. Alright, yeah. As far as you remember, you are making everything you just set up. You don't remember this guy in the slightest.
00:53:34
Speaker
He's an old friend, he's an uncle, his cousin's grandfather, his nephews, his sister's uncle, and just going down the rabbit hole. My initiative is also a 6, by the way. Okay, that's a 6. I'm going to write that down. What does it mean? My initiative is also a 6. Alright, 6. Sam, you got 5. What about Hikaru? I'll have you roll now, but it'll take effect next turn.
00:54:02
Speaker
Okay, I will. Five. Five, okay. And Walter is going to roll in. He's going to roll in that one. And this guy is going to roll for a five as well. So the current order this turn is Hikaru, Adorin, Sam, or no, Bruce and Adorin, you need to reroll.
00:54:32
Speaker
Best be Tai. Well, that time it was a nine. I got a two. Nine and a two. Okay. So it's going to go for this turn. Hikaru, Bruce, Sammy. Uh, I haven't labeled a Snover, but it's an Aaron, uh, Adorn and Walter. So Hikaru, you are up. All right. Okay. So I'm going to use charm and I'm going to say, all right, A.A. Ron. I don't want to fight you right now. I,
00:55:02
Speaker
I know you're hurt, and please, I really don't want to fight. And then she uses charm. 15, that beats a 6. Yes, okay, so what is the effect of charm? Does it have to make any... Minus 4. Sorry. Okay, minus 4, I didn't know if there was a wisdom saving throw or anything like that.
00:55:29
Speaker
Okay, so, wait, what did you say? Special defense? Attack. Attack, sorry. I blanked out for a second. Oh god, okay. Let me put it in my explore.
00:55:41
Speaker
gotcha okay it is now whoever i said goes next turn is bruce's turn yeah so we're just gonna be like well um i i don't know what kind of beef you have with us but you're clearly uh pretty bent on uh destroying us here so i'm just gonna have to throw an ember at you and that's an 18 all right that'll hit i do believe it is neutral damage because it is steel drop that is true
00:56:12
Speaker
I don't think anything else happens. What's the move? 1d8 plus 6. He's doing Ember. Yes. Wait, Steel Rock, that should be super effective. No, super effective against Steel, not very effective against Rock. Neutral. Yeah. I don't think it's not very effective against Rock. Let me double check. Is it really? Yeah, double check that because I could have sworn Fire isn't good against Rock.
00:56:43
Speaker
um no you're right yeah fire is neutral on our round okay okay well i rolled an eight on my d8 so that'll be 14 plus nine 23 damage fire special and that's special minus its special defense yeah
00:57:02
Speaker
Okay, and after that charm, it has a special, uh, a special attack. Sorry. It says special defense. It is... Where is its HP? That's not right. Okay, you said 23, correct? Yeah.
00:57:19
Speaker
all right as you deliver this ember it gets a face full of fire and it starts coughing up a storm and it is very much disgruntled it is now oh great sammy and the snopper snover the aaron both have the same speed roll i'm gonna have it regrow speed it's got a six what's gonna go next okay so it lunges at you with a metal claw who
00:57:49
Speaker
the sorry the air lunges it and it is lunges oh i'm sorry air lunges right everybody it lunges is that the person closest to it which would be she carved and it rolled an eight i gotta remember what mark caused damage dice is it's going to hit with an eight it is one d eight plus eight that is id 20 um that's off my defense which is 10 hold on so that's 11 plus it's a cool attack
00:58:19
Speaker
Oh god. It's gonna do 32 damage minus your physical defense. And have because not very effective against electric. Wait, metal? Does steel have that? Yeah. Does steel have that relationship with electric? Yeah.
00:58:35
Speaker
Uh, yeah, electric resist steel. Pretty sure. How do I know that? Okay, so it'll be 15 then. Wait, no, 16 is because it's... Well, I think it's, uh... No, no. No, 32 minus my defense. Then divided by 2. Just 10. Yes, then divided by 2. Okay, I guess. So it's, um... So it's 22 divided by 2. Okay, so that'd be 11. Yeah. Okay, so it'll be 11 damage.
00:59:03
Speaker
Yeah, and my static ability kicks in, so I'm gonna roll a d10 to see if this paralyzes the air. Okay. What is the... My physical attacks, yes. I'm sure steel can be paralyzed. Any type except the weapon can be paralyzed. I rolled a 9. Okay, and...
00:59:32
Speaker
on a D20 or? On a D10. Okay, and it's a 10% chance to happen, right? It, it's a 30%. So it's eight or greater. Oh, okay. Okay, yeah, okay, so that makes sense. So as this Eren makes contact with you, it slashes at you with metal cloth and you see a surge of electricity shoot up towards the body into the ground and it is now twitching slightly as it is paralyzed. Phew, at least I'm not knocked out.
01:00:02
Speaker
The next person is Sammy. What is Sammy doing? Going for the tried and true tackle. I do believe that is going to be four times not effective, I think. Against a steel guy? Yes, not effective against steel, not effective against rock. Okay, cool. Then let's just look at that. All right. That'll just be a single net effective. I got 16 for accuracy.
01:00:29
Speaker
Okay, what type is Lick? I do not remember. I think it's Ghost. Yeah, Ghost is neutral. Okay, I think it's neutral, yeah. Okay, I do believe so. This is just the episode where we go through the entire type chart because no one can remember anything about Steeler Rock. Yeah, you got to stop having us fight Erens. It's not my fault. It's specifically this one. Well, actually it is. It is absolutely my fault. Specifically this Eren, yeah. Ghost is neutral on Steel.
01:00:59
Speaker
okay so my d6 and i got a six plus five is 11 plus my special where's my special nine okay so 11 plus nine is 21 no 20 20
01:01:24
Speaker
we got it we got it all right so that's going to as you lick this thing in the face uh oh wait covered in slobber now what it's already paralyzed never mind i was gonna say it's gonna paralyze again paralyze is on a 15 up but it's already paralyzed from static now it's doubly paralyzed
01:01:43
Speaker
It looks very tired, and it looks like it's on its last legs. I do believe it is Adurin who is up next. Do I even wanna? Well, it's up to you. He's like, I have no beef with this guy. Yeah, I got no beef with you. I think I'll... Would it be possible to ask? You're like, hey, are you fighting me as well?
01:02:11
Speaker
The Eren, who is currently bleeding and is looking at you with daggers in his eyes, he is furious. He looks like he is going to basically kill anyone who gets in his way. So to answer your question with that once there, yes. You're associated with these four, I must kill you. Yeah, pretty much. I think I begrudgingly am like, alright, fine if you insist. And then go for a water gun.
01:02:38
Speaker
okay yep that'll be accuracy what is the oh it's that's empty guys did you know being a player is dramatically helpful i rolled a 16 hey you actually hit something i did it's a shock um i don't know what to do now that's how shocking goes uh roll that i don't know what to do from this point
01:03:00
Speaker
Uh, so it's 17 in total. So that's a, that's a, um, two plus six. Yeah. Yeah. That leads to 17. Um, minus. Okay. With this water gun, you have this little sploosh of water, but it like cheetahs it over on its side and it just falls over seemingly asleep or knocked out. Yeah. For what it's worth, water is super effective.
01:03:23
Speaker
It didn't matter, as long as he rolled higher than a 12 in total, I think it was. What did you roll? I rolled 17 before the defense drop. Oh, okay. Yeah. Yeah. So yeah, as long as he rolled higher than a 12, it didn't matter. He was down. If he did, I think it was 39 damage, he would have killed the Eren, but that would have been a sight to see. We'd finally be rid of this game.
01:03:50
Speaker
That's what I was going to say, Price. I'll solve some of your issues too. Don't worry, I'll see you in the next couple episodes that you listen to. I also roll bad as a player.
01:04:04
Speaker
you guys all get zero experience because experience doesn't matter in this campaign and this one shot so you guys i gotta remember where you guys are let me pull up my dungeon map experience doesn't matter i'm just going to give myself uh you know a couple thousand more let's see yeah i'm going to veto that i have evolved into a snore a g-max snorlax uh-huh yeah we'll go with that uh-huh so the room explodes
01:04:34
Speaker
Who wants to climb my tree? There is a hallway on the other side. The door you came from is to your right down the wall a little bit. There is another doorway across the room from where you are and there's a doorway to your left. The doorway to your left is the same hallway that was directly across the door you guys came through.
01:04:58
Speaker
so are there three hallways leading away from leading out of this room there's yes one the one closest to you leads to the entrance the one to your left leads the opposite way from the entrance and the one directly behind you across the room is another hole okay let's go straight as in like away from the entrance right let's see what we roll first to see how many spaces we get to move
01:05:25
Speaker
Yes, let's do that. So somebody else roll me a d10. I don't remember who's rolled a d10 yet, but I wanted everyone to at least roll. All three regular players have rolled. Oh, that's my turn. All right. Let's see what we got here. Oh, right. Because Walter's. Survey says. All right. Andrew with his cursed dice. They're working now. I got a seven. That's a solid number.
01:05:49
Speaker
Seven with a seven you guys the shortest path to the doorway you guys described is 1 2 3 4 1 2 3 You guys are still in the room, but you were sitting in front of the door I only encounter table you guys have ruled absolutely nothing you guys can't continue on Somebody I'm gonna have what well Walter's not a player. He doesn't get to roll guys someone else rule I got a zero is that a 10?
01:06:20
Speaker
Yes, on a d10 that is a 10. Okay. You move to zero spaces. So you move forward one, two. As you move forward two spaces, there is a hallway leading to your right, which you can see leads into a smaller room, or you can continue straight two more spaces into a larger room. Let's go into the larger room. All right, you move forward two more spaces and enter the larger room.
01:06:48
Speaker
Straight across from where you guys are seems to be the exit. Diagonally to your right is another hallway leading to another room. Let's go straight across. Alright, I believe you guys have six more spaces. One, two, three, four, five, six. You guys are two spaces away from what you can now easily see is the exit.
01:07:08
Speaker
There is daylight pouring out, white, blinding snowy light. And I need someone else, well no, I need to roll the encounter table. You guys, oh wow, I rolled two nines and a ten. You guys see absolutely nothing again. And I need someone else to roll me a dice as long as you don't roll one, you guys will make a throw. Five.
01:07:31
Speaker
five you guys take two steps and make it outside you guys come outside of the dungeon and you guys are on top of the mountains you click below you on off of a ledge and you can see the snowy town of winterberg i believe that's what i named it down below the lights twinkling
01:07:52
Speaker
And to your right you see what seems to be a wooden shack that is teetering on the edge of a cliff that has a wooden sign that says The Grunch and a little doghouse that says Mocks on it. Now I'm not going to say that we found it, but I think we found it. Is it time to throw an ember at it? Not serious. Oh my god, why is that your first thought? Not serious at all.
01:08:22
Speaker
I've got a bad feeling about this, so I'm gonna heal up and use my Oran Berry. Okay. All right. I believe that's a straight D10. I think that's how Oran Berries work. D8. D8, okay. Nat 1. Okay, so I think we've eaten three Oran Berries-less campaigns so far, and I think it's been a 1, a 1, and a 2.
01:08:49
Speaker
I think. I know there's been at least two nat 1s, so man, these ombreas are not effective. You might want to try your citrus berry. That might, that might heal you up a bit more. Well, I do have two Reviver seeds. That's true. You also bought a couple citrus berries, didn't you? I just bought one citrus berry. Ah, okay. Shall we move on ahead then?
01:09:19
Speaker
Alright, yes, what is your guys' plan? So, go up to the house. The big one. Okay, you go up to the main house and it says The Grinch on it. And it is a very rickety house. You can see smoke coming out of it. It's got holes in the gaps between the planks. Looks like it was hand built. And it is teetering on the edge of the cliff with supports leaning out over the cliff. And looks like even the slightest breeze will knock this whole thing over.
01:09:48
Speaker
i'm gonna go up and knock on the door maybe we just need to build this guy a better house maybe that'll be happier true maybe his heart will grow a size or two
01:10:03
Speaker
as you guys knock on the door, well as Hikaru knocks on the door, you hear some angry muttering coming from inside, and you hear some footsteps come up, and you see an exaggeratedly large eye peeking through one of the holes in the, or the gaps in between the wooden planks. And he opens up the door and he's like, you see a miezcarada, and he looks down at you guys, he's like, what do you guys want and how did you get up here?
01:10:32
Speaker
Yo, we're looking for the Grinch. Yeah. Are you the Grinch? Yes, I am the Grinch. What do you guys want? Can I get a high five? No. We just, we heard that a bell went missing from the church down in, what's it, it's not called freezing. No, it's Wintersburg. Yeah. Um, yeah. So what? And I just wanted to know if you know anything about it.
01:11:00
Speaker
Yeah, of course I did that. Stupid people down in Wintersburg, they don't need Christmas. Without this bell, they won't get any. They'll all forget, because the bell won't ring and everyone will be miserable, just like me. Why do you want everybody else to be miserable? Well, that's not the rules. Can I roast stealth? Uh, sure. What are you attempting to do? Get in the house.
01:11:21
Speaker
Uh, she is currently standing in this room. So unless you get a nat, so yeah, roll stealth, but you must get a nat 20. Oh, okay. No, I thought there would be more room in that case. I probably like try to sneak around to the back of the house or the side of the house or something. If you guys want to do that, you can attempt with that. All right. Well, Takaro and I are distracting him. You three. I like it. I like it. Let's go.
01:11:47
Speaker
I'm in, like, full pacifist mode today. I didn't... I'm gonna try to, like, understand why the... you know, why the Grinch is acting the way he's acting. Are you gonna ask him that? Yeah, try to just... well, not ask him that, but... because he just told us, but, like, try to figure... try to see if we can, you know, make him a little bit less miserable.
01:12:10
Speaker
Okay, so first I know Mr. The Grinch, why do you hate Christmas so much? While you see, back when I was a little kid, back in 1907, I had stupid, I had a mansion and wonderful parents.
01:12:30
Speaker
And one Christmas I got 36 presents instead of 37 and I was so mad I swore to my parents I would never participate in Christmas again and I made sure everyone since then would never have Christmas the same as I did. I was so miserable.
01:12:50
Speaker
i swore i would ruin christmas forever and that is what i'm doing this year nobody will stop me at this point i need those who are sneaking away to roll stealth i got a 13 18 minus one 17 he rolled a 19 so he sees you guys sneaking away he's like hey what do you guys think you're doing oh well we were just gonna take a quick look around you know uh you gotta
01:13:19
Speaker
Got a nice place up here on the mountain, it looks like. It looks like the mountain has a very nice view. I just wanted to get around your head. I'm not stupid, you know. You're not taking that bell back. I know exactly what you guys are up to. Who sent you after this anyway? No one comes up here willingly unless they wish to die. A really old guy who was kind of dying himself. It was a... Conjure? No, Roger!
01:13:45
Speaker
Oh, Roger, yeah, that's the guy I stole the bell from, of course, he would send you up here. Yeah, he's a crazy old coot. Yeah, he ain't getting that bell back from me, that's for sure. So, let's see, what would it take to get the bell back from you? Well, you'll either have to take it from my dead cold body, or you'll have to give me something equal in return to Christmas itself. Something equal in return? Have you heard of the elemental bell?
01:14:16
Speaker
There's a shopkeep down there that's got one. I'll tell you right now, that's much better than this rickety old thing. Gold? Nah, nah, nah. Try multicolored. I mean, this does sound intriguing. How much is it going for currently? Honestly, the shopkeeper's got a lot of stuff going on. Exactly. How much is it going for for you?
01:14:36
Speaker
Zero poke. For me, it'd be a lot more for you. If you can bring me back this elemental bell, I will give you guys this useless metal bell of Christmas. No, no, no, no. We can't do that, all right? See, if we go down, we'd have to pay a lot of money. If you go down, that's a different story.
01:14:55
Speaker
And what's the difference between me going down there and you going down there? I want Bruce and Doran to roll deception with disadvantage. I'm right here trying to be like, you're a celebrity. You're famous down there. You're famous down there. You're a famous person.
01:15:19
Speaker
Yeah, sorry, whoever's talking to Grunch. Yeah, that's Sammy and I. What are we, the deception, you said? I was talking to the Grunch, too. Well, about this convoluted idea? No, yes. Not in this conversation. Oh my goodness. Okay. What is deception? Cute. Oh, yeah, just the cute. This is a cute. Cool. Into the cute. Oh, well, that's my stat, dude. I got a seven plus two. Not good.
01:15:49
Speaker
What about you? What about a durum? You said a disadvantage or a regal? Disadvantage. Because this is a quite... Oh, disadvantage. I did not roll with disadvantage. Okay. Oh no! I gotta roll again. My bad. I hit a nat 20. Oh no, did you get an nat 20? But I can't use it. Oh no! It's 11 plus 213.
01:16:09
Speaker
Uh, he rolled a 19. If you had kept a nat 20, it actually would have worked. He rolled a second nat 20 twice. So, uh... Hang on, I gotta get my other die. I didn't roll with disadvantage. Well, they don't really matter at this point. Unless, uh, somehow you can get, uh, nat, uh, unless somehow you can roll 20, but also be less than, what is it, 11?
01:16:34
Speaker
90 sorry it was worse oh Yeah, so he's the two
01:16:43
Speaker
yeah she gives you a deadpan stare like really i'm not that stupid i know how shops work if it's expensive for you it's expensive for me people down in wintersburg don't like me what gives you the idea that they'll give me a discount discount look i got a five-figure discount for you okay i think this do you even have five fingers okay do i have five fingers that's a valid one i have
01:17:04
Speaker
He looks at his fingers and he has three colors if me else corona has five fingers Two of them are gone on his hand because I can't be bothered to look up a picture of me else corona three-fingered this game I think he is three years each So what do you guys have to offer for the bell? Well, I got this sweet chocolate this copy Sweet chocolate. All right. I got this I got a rock citrus berry here. I
01:17:34
Speaker
i've got a copy of i got a pet rock her name is jennifer and she's really cool can i see that pet rock yeah uh are you handing it to him sure ha my now he chucks into the house oh i thought he was gonna check in with the mountain since you're next to a cliff all right he runs back into the house and he chucks it when he runs back into the house can i run into the house
01:17:57
Speaker
uh oh yeah actually sure yes uh roll stealth regular but also denifer is now gone so that's fun good thing this is non-canon she wasn't in my inventory to begin with yep first 14 minus 113
01:18:13
Speaker
Okay, I'm gonna say you make it into the house, but you only have a couple seconds before he turns around and notices you. So, do what you can, or hide, or whatever you want to do. Yeah, can I stealth my way in here? I'm gonna... Quick, turn invisible. I'm gonna try to bop him on the head with quick attack. Oh, okay. So as Adorn is stealthing in, Hikara's gonna go in for the good old bop, and I need you to roll your accuracy. Evelyn, what happened in the passive?
01:18:39
Speaker
Yeah, that's a good question. What? What happened to Pacifist? This guy's not listening to reason. Well, I don't think the Pacifist approach is going well. No, I love your switch. Anyway, I got a nat 20. Oh, God. Okay, so you hit him. I'm not even going to make you roll damage. As you hit him in the head, he goes out cold. What? Is that easy?
01:19:07
Speaker
I think I'm currently, like, tucked between a couple of cushions and then pop out, like, huh. That went better than I thought it would. Guys, find the bell! Now, because he was next to the window, I need Hikaru to roll acrobatics to make sure you don't fly out the window. Okay. What roll is that? That is cool. Okay. Cool. Uh, yes. Eight. You go flying out the window.
01:19:39
Speaker
Bruce doesn't have anything, darn it. I'm gonna roll something real quick, but I'm so glad this is not a candidate. Okay. I am too slow to catch her. I don't have quick attack yet, so I can't quick attack after and try to snag her tail or something out the window. Is there a way I could throw a Rockman somehow? I'm gonna see if I can land on my feet.
01:20:01
Speaker
Okay, one second. Adorn, you're gonna throw a... No, no, no, no, no. I'm trying.
Rescue Mission and Rising Tensions
01:20:06
Speaker
Is that my rock? Just a rock. This is not... I'm not doing this. I'm not doing this. This is a terrible idea. Okay, okay. Does anyone have any ideas? I will give each of you one action. And if not, I have rolled something and I will not say what I have rolled against Hikaru until all of you guys have taken your action.
01:20:26
Speaker
and I will stress this if something doesn't happen Hikaru will die can I try to just like rush forward with a tackle as soon as I see her going in for the quick attack and see if I can like catch her at the window or something uh tackle will not tackle will not increase your speed if so uh that will not give you an eye throw a blast see that Hikaru hoping the explosion will knock her back into the house okay I went
01:20:54
Speaker
i think that would kill her yeah go for it i want you to roll with disadvantage because you would have to have a detonate as you throw it past her as soon as she exits the window and make it so that she doesn't die so even if this works you have to make sure it doesn't kill her this is so incredible what am i rolling uh rolling just a straight up d20 with disadvantage you have to get 15 or higher
01:21:21
Speaker
okay well if she dies one way or another i don't know which one's more fun
01:21:35
Speaker
uh-oh um okay so because you didn't get less than a five you didn't uh the blast he did does detonate but it sends yokaro even further down which eliminates everyone's other actions she is sped her up can i try to use escapist to uh have her have my explorer badge
01:22:02
Speaker
you're not in a dungeon and it was because you guys not have a guild badge it would not do anything you're right can i use can i use my course checker skill what is course checker doesn't that get you make you not lost if you are lost roll cool success gets you back on track i hate to break a team but you're not lost you sure
01:22:22
Speaker
Not yet, you're not. Okay, I'm going to start a timer. You guys have 10 seconds from the time I finish this sentence to figure something else out, otherwise your car will hit the bottom. And you're going... 10... 9... Does anyone have any ideas? Guys, I have an idea. Let's do like a tower. Let's all just stack up on each other. Okay, my idea. I jump out the window. I jump out the window myself. I use water gun in the air to speed myself down.
01:22:48
Speaker
Okay, uh, uh, Duran jumps out the window. Jukaru having two seconds left to hit the bottom. How fast? I started talking before that. The idea is that we're fine. Wait, use the water gun to catch... That's what I'm... I'm trying to get... Yeah, I'm trying to get down to the bottom. I'm trying to get down to the bottom first. Like, slow myself down, turn around, water gun there, and catch her like that.
01:23:13
Speaker
Okay, this is gonna require multiple checks. Okay, you have to succeed every single check. I swear, I'm not trying to make you card dive, but she's like 20 feet from- Can I also jump out the window, but defense curl, roll down the hill? You're not- it's not a hill, it's a cliff. It is a straight fall, straight to the bottom of the mountain. Okay, but would you consider a cliff a staircase, and this would be a staircase for me to tumble? No, not in the slightest.
01:23:41
Speaker
Edward, I need you to roll accuracy as you leap out the window to push yourself further down. Gotcha. Uh, that's a 16.
01:23:51
Speaker
Okay, so you are current, you jump out the window, you point the water gun upwards, you speed yourself down towards the curve, which at this point has one second to hit the ground. As you catch up to her, you are both about 10 feet off the ground. Make one more accuracy check, and one action, that is all I will get. So we're on, we're at the same level?
01:24:14
Speaker
Yes, you guys are on the same level. You guys are both at terminal velocity. That's fine. I can grab Hikaru and then water gun the ground. Okay, you grab Hikaru. Okay, you have to do a... I have another idea. You have to do a water gun.
01:24:32
Speaker
a dub to bring yourself to a stop with physics works is you'll have to water gun it twice the speed of your terminal velocity so you have to get a nat 20 water gun or you're dead uh before i roll this does anyone have any last minute special just ends with all of us dying i have an idea okay they're too far gone have you ever seen those are 10 feet off the ground wait will my
01:25:03
Speaker
uh i guess we'll see have you ever seen like in spongebob where he uses his tongue as like a snowboard can i use lick the snowboard down the hill sorry let's get enterude out of the way first enterude i need you to roll just a flat d20 this will only succeed if you get a nat 20
01:25:29
Speaker
I just turned into a- I apologize if I've killed you off in a non-canon event. Oh my gosh! It's a frickin' F20! Send me a picture, I do not believe that. Is it a 20? Send a picture.
01:26:00
Speaker
Oh my god. Oh yeah, send a picture real quick. Just put it in the teacher's lounge. What has this episode become? Oh my god. In my headphones game. Oh my god, okay.
01:26:24
Speaker
Oh my god, okay, so... You guys are both hurtling at terminal velocity towards the ground.
01:26:33
Speaker
Adurin flips around at the last second, grabs Hikaru, does a nat 20 water gun, and you guys come to a perfect stop at the bottom. Now, with that out of the way, Sammy, you are a heavy bowling ball running down the valley. That's it. I spent all this time saving Hikaru. We're gonna get run over.
01:26:56
Speaker
You had an idea to use your tongue as a surfboard. However, much like these are not known for having giant tongues.
Disaster Strikes: Surviving Chaos
01:27:04
Speaker
So I... You have just hurled yourself out there with no way to stop yourself. Did anyone grab the bow? Eli's still up there. I gotta hope he's grabbed it. Eli's still up there. That's why I'll be hoping.
01:27:29
Speaker
Sammy, you have one action, you will die. Excuse me. Alright, Sammy, what is your idea? You got one action. Defense, girl.
01:27:48
Speaker
Okay, you defense, Curl, and as we know- This is gonna chuck both of his citrusberries out the window at the people that are down there, just in case they're needed. It will not reach him. Alright, those citrusberries are chucked out the window, they are much lighter and will not reach thermo-velocity before the gigantic rolling wall. They just stick in the snow.
01:28:11
Speaker
As you use... As you use the fenced ground. You hit the ground and you are dead. What? He doesn't bounce or anything? Come on now. That sounds like something a monarch would do. Sammy hits the ground and you have... I won't go into any gory details but you are dead. Just imagine that for yourself.
01:28:45
Speaker
we got a we got a 15 foot deep uh imprint of a munchlax in the ground okay i gotta take a second holy crap
01:29:00
Speaker
I tried everything I could to save, broken. Oh my god, I need to recap this real quick. You saw, he can't jump off a cliff. You saw a door and jump off a cliff, and then you went after them. He just died. Oh my god. I have no idea what just happened. Okay, um.
01:29:28
Speaker
So, what does Hikaru and... Can I roll for this? It's hitting your mind, reviving him. He's 100% dead. Reviver Seed? I should have bought the Reviver Seed. He's all the way on the ground. What does Hikaru and Adurin do now that there are bits of Sammy all over them? Can I see if my Reviver Seed works? You can attempt so, yes.
01:29:57
Speaker
Okay, I'm gonna try to give him a reviver seed, and then if it works, we can put it back together. Put him back together, just like Humpty Dumpty. You attempt to give him a reviver seed, but since he is already dead and you are not a necromancer, it does not bring him back to life. It's a Christmas miracle.
01:30:18
Speaker
This is not how I expected this to go! This is the first time we've actually had to use this. One of the changes I made between PTT and Not A Scratch is that Pokemon do actually die if the damage is high enough. Oh yes, we don't do death saving throws today. Well definitely not for this case.
01:30:44
Speaker
There is nothing you can come back as a ghost and say hey Caro you are wrong. We do die
01:30:52
Speaker
I'm sorry. You can come back as a gas leak later on, baby. If you guys do something at the church, I don't know. Okay, you're going to go back up to Bruce, who is currently by your... You and Walter just watched all your friends jump out the window, and you were convinced that you were the only ones left alive.
01:31:18
Speaker
Bruce is gonna go up the window and call down. I thought you were gonna jump off the window. No, you didn't call down to see if anyone's okay. It's about 2,000 feet down. You can neither see them because of the blizzard norseer though. It is back far down. Wait, how did they survive? We're gonna go with that. Yeah, you guys are at the top of a mountain. It's a magic cave.
01:31:48
Speaker
uh well i guess we still have to finish the mission right walter well we just watched and then we could probably prepare a funeral probably should what's up you hear a ghostly voice that you can't tell us we're gonna not just yell respect for continuing the mission okay so i guess we're continuing on with bruce and uh walter say walter looks at you pale face he's like
01:32:18
Speaker
I think they're dead. We don't know that yet. We can only assume. I'm still holding our troops and somebody's alive. Gross, they just fell out of a 2,000 foot fall. And he leans out the window to look down and sees exactly what you saw, which is absolutely nothing.
01:32:39
Speaker
yeah they're dead oh god uh okay i think there was at least there's about a five percent chance that someone's alive i seriously doubt that oh we gotta get down there asap and walter sprints out the house and into the cave
01:32:57
Speaker
Dude, I was only joking about the window too. Oh no. Bruce is going to quickly scan the house for the bell to grab the bell and then run out. Bruce has his priorities, man. Roll perception. Oh my god. I didn't expect this to happen.
01:33:23
Speaker
okay so i got a 12 plus 2 14 okay with a 14 you can see out the window that uh the bell is sitting on in outside in the back of the house in a gigantic sleigh okay
01:33:42
Speaker
I am going to go and grab the bell. See, can I take the sled through the cave? Okay, I will point this out. The cave isn't big enough for the sleigh. It is like a gigantic sleigh. It is holding a liberty-sized, liberty bell-sized item. Can I ride the sleigh down the mountain? Okay.
01:34:05
Speaker
You can you can hop up in the seat and you get or you can push a forward and then hop on the seat You can do that. Yes That's the question on everyone's mind so there's only one way to find out the other question is if he does survive Where will he end up? If he does survive and he finds out what happened to Sammy, how will he end up?
01:34:33
Speaker
that is another good question because yeah bruce is not that that will actually be the start of bruce's villain arc well you better hope that this is going to act like this for several years by now you better hope this is a magic swing just killed sammy how much does how much does bruce believe in santa
01:34:53
Speaker
We're adults. I'm pretty sure we know that Santa's not. Probably not at all. Alright, then. That is your belief on this sleigh. That it is probably not a magic sleigh. Was the Grunch Santa the whole time? What does this sleigh look like? Wait, can you use... This sleigh? It's your stereotypical red Santa sleigh. Basically, if you picture Santa's sleigh, that's what it looks like. Hold on, Bruce, can you use a fire-type move to break? Like a rocket engine?
01:35:24
Speaker
Rocket engine. Ooh. Does it have a rocket engine? I think she's thinking your mouth is the rocket engine. Yeah, just to push against the direction you're going in. I don't know if he would survive the crash that he'll probably have. Yeah, I think I don't know how I would move the bell not using the sleigh.
01:35:49
Speaker
so because i'm assuming bell be big big gold brass thing whatever yeah it is syndical can i think i said before it was a couple hundred pounds but realistically this thing's probably a couple tons so yeah okay so yeah bruce is gonna have to uh
01:36:09
Speaker
happen this way and see what happens and he will the thought will pass through his mind hey this slave looks like all of the stanta stories i wonder if that means anything okay i need to all right so you're gonna start sliding on the mountain yeah if i can't fit in the cave okay so we're gonna start sliding down the mountain and i need you to roll perception yes perception
01:36:40
Speaker
Just beauty. Alright.
01:36:46
Speaker
That is a nat 20, baby. All right. So we got a 22. So you definitely noticed this, but I'm not sure how you're going to be able to deal with it. There are two things you notice. First of all, you notice the reins are not connected to anything. And second of all, as the sleigh is sliding down, you see mocks, the herdier, run after the sleigh as it is starting to slide down the mountain. And you start descending down the mountain.
01:37:15
Speaker
Well, I'm going to throw an ember at the max. Okay, roll accuracy. Didn't expect that. That is a 19. Roll damage. Right, damage on ember. 1d8 plus 6.
01:37:37
Speaker
That is an eight. OK, it's 14. Oh, yeah, the 20. You hit Mox in the face and his whiskers and first start to I think as whiskers, I'm not sure. No, it doesn't. Doesn't. There's a mustache. Yeah. His mustache starts to burn up and he is currently on fire and he runs away.
01:38:02
Speaker
And I'm going to say this now because it is currently too late, but Mux was supposed to pull the sleigh. Um, and you are now hurtling. And as this thought crosses your mind, you refocus on what is happening to you and you were hurtling at again, once again, terminal velocity down the mountain in a sleigh with a giant 5,000 pound bell behind you. I said, I didn't think you'd survive the crash. You all never really have.
01:38:33
Speaker
uh hey we hey maybe we won't crash maybe we'll find a ram or just some kind of suicide spot i didn't expect the entire full party wipe on this episode hey walter is still alive pikaru is still alive adurin is still alive so you were currently traveling down this mountain and uh that is unless bruce runs into them
01:39:03
Speaker
Alright, I'm going to let you take a series of actions, but for every action you take, I will roll a d20. If you fail a certain check, the sleigh will bump in a certain way and go flying.
01:39:21
Speaker
okay so you can either choose to do nothing and let fate take its course in which case i will roll three d20s or you can try and do an action to stop it in which case i will only roll one d20 per action okay i am going to uh try to like steer the sleigh into like the
01:39:48
Speaker
the least straight down section of the mountain is this what you were doing try to like get it get it onto like a path maybe where it's like going diagonally down the mountain or something so is this totally is this what you're doing yeah like assuming the mountain is a normal mountain that's not just straight up sheer cliff all the way around uh that's like a five degree dude grade straight down if uh five degrees from vertical
01:40:19
Speaker
All the way around the mountain? What kind of mountain is this? It's a very tall and pointy mountain. That is not a mountain, sir! It is a tall and pointy mountain, that's what I have in my head. It's almost like a spike coming out of the ground, is what I imagined. The way slays are steered is with something pulling it, pulling it either to the left or the right. You have conveniently forgotten one certain mox that could have steered the sleigh.
01:40:47
Speaker
and you have small nub arms and you have small nub arms so i will count that as your action of you realizing that you have no absolutely no way of steering this sleigh well then i guess i'm well that i'm going to uh i think you should um say your final words i the very first die i rolled it was a two
01:41:12
Speaker
yeah you had to be a five for each of the checks uh are you kidding me i will so can i like can i dig deep into myself and try to pull out a flamethrower there's something to slow this down okay first uh first things first because i had to roll for the slay also i will post this in the chat uh you
01:41:37
Speaker
sleigh hits a bump and suddenly is no longer riding on the mountain but is flying through the air tumbling and you go flying out of the sleigh and so does the bell. You hear a loud gong as the bell hits the side of the mountain and I'll give you one more action before you yourself hit the side of this mountain.
01:42:00
Speaker
Can I pull out a flamethrower? Since it is not something you have to learn, you must give me a convincing reason as to why Sammy, not Sammy Caruso would either know or be able to learn a flamethrower on the spot. Well, you know how things typically do like learn
01:42:25
Speaker
or like can perform feats of Inhumane strength in times of extreme stress and I feel like Imminent death is probably something I'm thinking like anime where Any of any one of ashes battles where one of his Pokemon is like on the brink and then all of a sudden
01:42:52
Speaker
learn something new or evolved or something on the spot to kind of like open the battle up again. Okay sure I'll accept that. Roll me yeah sure roll me a d20 with disadvantage and we'll count it as a flamethrower since we're going to assume this is in your learn slot since you have not used it before. Yeah. Even though you already have five it's the only time period.
01:43:18
Speaker
darn that disadvantage oh no got a 13 and a 3 if it makes you feel any better i would have said that uh fire is not a very good propellant on its own uh you need an actual force like an explosion to be able to stop yourself because fire is not gonna slow you down like water is because it's more physical
01:43:41
Speaker
This is why I chose to try the glass seed at the start of this. So even if you had succeeded, I probably would not have given it to you. With a second and crunch, you hit the side of a mountain and passed unconscious. Unconscious? You are not quite dead, but we will come back to you later. I will do a series of rolls to determine whether or not you have died.
01:44:05
Speaker
we are going to cut over to um adurn and sukart so this is what you guys see uh in the distance you hear gong gong gong and you look up at the bell and you see the bell hurtling towards you uh at a very extreme speed as if the bell itself was using extreme speed you see a red sleigh tumbling down towards you and what seems to be the unconscious body of bruce who is more than likely dead
01:44:34
Speaker
um can i can i try i do not know how to use electro web can i no way okay i'm sorry sorry i just wrote some background guys and uh well we'll get to that in a minute can i try to use electro web to to catch all of them do you know electro web i don't okay then we'll kind of go in the sense your life currently is not at uh i mean you kind of work just okay i'm gonna say
01:45:03
Speaker
For the same reason that Bruce was able to attempt flamethrower, I will let you attempt electro web. Okay. Yeah, so just roll the flat d20 twice, disadvantage. D20 with disadvantage.
01:45:22
Speaker
On my first roll, I got a nat one. Oh no. Well, you managed to, in your attempt, you send out a Thunder Shock and it hits yourself. Which is, because I do believe you know Thunder Shock, right? Yeah.
01:45:42
Speaker
okay i'm not gonna make you take any damage currently because i don't think that's enough to kill you and currently uh i don't think that's going to matter in the future but i am going to send you my dice rolls for bruce's uh death saving throws since he did not fall all the way down um i want you to take a look at the three dice i rolled just as uh you had to roll at uh above a 10 two times in a row to be able to survive out of the three dice
01:46:12
Speaker
See, this is why I prefer physical death over electronic death. He rolled a 9, a 5, and a 7. He failed every one of his death saving throws. And as Bruce tumbles down to the bottom with a second and crunch, the bell falls on top of him. Wow. There's no question about it. Bruce is 100% dead as well. Oh no. Oh no. We've lost two of our people today.
01:46:42
Speaker
At this point Walter comes sprinting out of the cave Panting and he he sees you and he sees a Durna Hikaru and he runs up because I like oh, thank God you guys are alive Oh, thank God and then he stops stuck still as he sees both Bruce on the mountain on the bottom of the mountainside and Sammy We're both very much not alive
01:47:12
Speaker
Bruce was under the bell, wasn't he? The bell fell on top of Bruce. His feet are sticking out like the witch from Wizard of Oz. It hit you and then continued tumbling on because it's heavier and has more momentum. So, Walter looks at you guys and is like, are they dead?
01:47:43
Speaker
oh he's he's saying that too either he covered adoring pretty much yeah and welter just yeah pretty much faints on the spot
01:47:59
Speaker
and he's not dead or anything but he is while he fainted um right well you guys uh on the bright side you got the bell down the mountain on the bad side the bell and this is turns out this is just a story that mrs bruce's mom told us the whole time
Reflections and Aftermath
01:48:20
Speaker
You guys take a look at the bell in its current state and the slate. Both are completely mangled in a big metal ball. Oh my gosh. The bell became a big mangled ball? Yes. After falling down 2,000 feet off of a mountain, it has been utterly destroyed. Oh no.
01:48:45
Speaker
So, what are your guys' actions? Like, I'm not even thinking about the bell at this point. I just lost two of my friends. Oh my god. So you're not gonna believe this, but I just, just for the fun of it, I rolled my own set of three death saving throws. Two of my numbers were the same as yours. I had a five, a seven, and then a fourteen. Oh my god, it still failed.
01:49:13
Speaker
So even with my own roles, I still would have failed. Okay, and I think it is with this. We cut over two months later to Gale Beach.
01:49:26
Speaker
and you are in a group of people who are all wearing black and you guys are at the cemetery where two graves are being uh where two coffins are being lowered into a grave um everyone's sad and crying there are pictures of Bruce and Sammy
01:49:49
Speaker
Sammy's parents are hugging each other crying. Bruce's mom is very upset, obviously, and used to be in there. She's Alfred. Oh yeah, Alfred's there too. And the person conducting the funeral looks at you guys and he's like, if you guys have any final words, now is your time to save it. I guess I'll say something. I knew Sammy since...
01:50:18
Speaker
middle school, and we were really good friends. I met Bruce towards the end of high school as seniors, and though we didn't know each other very well at the beginning, we all really got to know each other through our adventures together, and I'm really, you know, I'm gonna miss these guys really.
01:50:44
Speaker
They, you know, they were some of my best friends through the journeys that we went on together. And I wish them the best possible journeys in whatever is next. That's my eulogy for them. Yeah, the person conducting funerals has very nice words. Thank you. Anything from you, Adora, any gestures to you? I don't know if I would be there. Because you're back home, aren't you?
01:51:13
Speaker
Uh, yeah, I just assumed you would want to attend a funeral. If you don't want to, that's okay. I can omit that. That's the thing, because since it's not in my hometown, I don't know... Feels really crass, but I don't know if I would've gone, right? Okay, so, uh, we cut, in that case, uh, we see the caskets getting lowered in, and everyone puts a hand folder over the caskets, and over time, everyone leaves, and...
01:51:39
Speaker
be cut over to Wintersburg with a door in the church, the bell still missing.
01:51:47
Speaker
Everyone missed Christmas. It never happened. The Grunch is still alive. He has shown his face, but he is not dead. He was just knocked out. Christmas was ruined forever, and the town of Wintersburg will never remember when Christmas is. And Roger, over the night, has turned into a pile of dust.
01:52:12
Speaker
Roger was, or not Roger, Adorin was chosen as the next person to take place for leading the church as placed. Would Adorin have accepted or declined that offer? I feel like I would have accepted, but you can tell you all, like the age is already getting to me. Okay. So you can see as soon as I accepted, I aged another 10 years of your church growing, the dust starts to settle.
01:52:39
Speaker
Okay, and we are going to close out on a door and giving the crowd a speech about why Christmas is so important and why we must remember when Christmas is and why calendars should be invented. But you sound like an old man, so. And I think that is where we are going to end this episode. Not the direction I expected this to go at all. I didn't expect you guys to have an utter fail here.
01:53:07
Speaker
This is why you don't give your players roles that can fail and send them off a cliff out a window to their death. I realize we have all learned something today. Maybe don't give us so much for your reign. I'm glad this was not in canon because if this was canon, this would be terrible.
01:53:29
Speaker
And that's it. Show us how it works. Guys, this was actually, I apologize for this. I should probably be clean now. This was all a long-term ploy by me to eliminate the competition and I'm glad it was successful. I just want to point out though, Honored, I noticed in your Nat 20 die,
01:53:49
Speaker
that you were using the same dice set that I used to roll a nat 1 earlier in the episode. So our dice balanced out. I've been Dakota, your PM, your DM, your GM. I've been a laughing, crying Evelyn playing Hikaru, who is miraculously still alive.
01:54:14
Speaker
And I've been Eli playing a surprisingly good Bruce. And I've been Sean. And I was playing Sammy. But don't worry. This isn't real. Yeah. Oh. Yeah, hi. I'm here. Yeah, let's not forget about our guest. Hi. I'm Andrew. I'm retiring now. Because clearly I'm the problem. A special guest. All right. You heard it here, guys. And the sketch is being canceled. I will take the name. I'm retiring as a player. How's that? Let me be more specific.
01:54:41
Speaker
That's acceptable. Okay. Merry Christmas, guys. Don't do what we just did. Please don't fling yourself out of windows and have a better Christmas. Merry Christmas, guys. Don't worry. Everyone remember, Christmas episode is not real. It can't hurt you.