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Funny Moments and Story Time
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Motorcycles on fire, Stretched Pizza, lowing up the Universe and many more!
We ran out of backlog so this is a compilation of Funny Moments and never heard before stories from our Patreon.
Patreon - https://www.patreon.com/user?u=60748541
Discord - https://discord.gg/A7NCWyPkSd
Dakota as the PM, DM, GM
Evelyn as Hikaru Hatsumi the Pikachu
Eli as Bruce Flameback the Cyndaquil
Shawn as Sammy Pepperoni the Munchlax
Jake as Walter Fisthands the Riolu
Micah as Blair the Absol
E_V as Nyx the Eevee
Recommended
Transcript
Introduction and Special Episode Announcement
00:00:11
Speaker
Hello everyone and welcome to the Path Through Time. My name is Dakota, your PM, your GM, your GM, and this is a special episode as you can probably tell from the title. um We ran out of stuff to upload unfortunately. we could We haven't been able to record in like over a month at this point I think.
00:00:31
Speaker
So we yeah we ran out of backlogs. We had to pull some stuff from our Patreon.
Episode Structure and Segments
00:00:38
Speaker
So what you're listening to right now is going to be a compilation of stuff over from our, well, it's no longer called a Bronze Tear, forget what it's called.
00:00:46
Speaker
um I really should know that. but ah So this episode is going be brought into two segments. The first segment is going to be our funny moments section.
00:00:57
Speaker
We have a bunch of funny moments that are pulled from the episodes in no particular order. Excuse me. And our second section, which is to take of the majority episode, is the stories that we recorded specifically for Patreon.
00:01:14
Speaker
Um, like a year ago, something like that. don't remember how long it's been. Uh, so yeah, uh, audio quality may be variable because these were pulled from many different episodes.
00:01:28
Speaker
Uh, so if there's background music in them, it's because it was pulled from the depthps episode after edited. I'm pretty sure. Um, so if you hear background music, I'm sorry, I can't credit it. I can't pull that directly right now.
00:01:41
Speaker
So without further ado, uh, enjoy.
Humorous Exchanges and Banter
00:01:47
Speaker
Sammy, stop talking me. I'm trying to go back to bed.
00:01:52
Speaker
You go back to bed. It's like, got tired you trying to snuggle me again last night. I'm not! I know I'm big and soft and cuddly, but dang. and We've gotten real close recently. you know We're pretty good friends now, but not stay away from me while I'm sleeping. I'm um that i'm an animal in in bed.
00:02:10
Speaker
Whoa, wait. Whoa! Freezing there, Sammy. Freezing.
00:02:19
Speaker
You hear that, ladies? Oh my god, that's ah that's a clip for the Patreon. Jesus.
00:02:25
Speaker
Oh, that's a great one. That's a blooper right there. Don't cuddle me too hard, Walter. I'm an animal, Ben. said Okay, what do you got?
00:02:37
Speaker
Fellas, friends, I fell out of my chair and just laughed on the ground. yeah you Oh, no no Jesus Christ. Oh, fucking hell. my mind, i was just thinking that he, like, kicks and moves around a lot.
00:02:52
Speaker
And i've never raised for that so for whatever reason, that translated to animal. And immediately once I said it, was like, shit, that's wrong. Okay.
00:03:07
Speaker
Yeah, except for those times I took you to soccer competitions on Brain Beans Island, you've never been outside of girl beach. How do you expect to survive right there?
00:03:19
Speaker
Yeah. How do you expect to survive? We're Pokemon, we don't die. Sorry.
00:03:27
Speaker
Straight facts, we don't die.
00:03:38
Speaker
Jesus says Christ, I was not expecting. We are Pokemon, we do not die.
00:03:50
Speaker
and then um And then Zekrom followed Reginald into the factory with Reginald's headstock trailing behind him.
00:04:04
Speaker
called a neck! Yeah. Yeah. His headstock! His tree trunk neck. Sorry. his his tree trunk la has tree trunk neck sorry Yeah, Reginald's um reginald's long ass neck, which is ah How long is that? He's 36 feet. Yeah, they're like 36 feet tall.
00:04:35
Speaker
Yeah, it was like 30 some feet or something like that. Okay, I rolled a four-teacher for a handshake. I rolled a one. What the hell are you doing?
00:04:47
Speaker
Evie missed completely. Do you guys give me a hand, you're gonna slap me across the face? What do you do? i what it I... I accidentally scratch you.
00:05:00
Speaker
Roll a D100! I heard word scratch. Please, no! Roll a D100. Uhhh... i Okay, I've got a D100 right here, let me roll it.
00:05:14
Speaker
But I also have one, and I just rolled it already. What do you got? No, I'm not kidding. It did give a hundred. No, you did. No, you Give me Show your screen. I'm not... No, no. That's not happening.
00:05:28
Speaker
So, sorry guys, the world's ending.
00:05:33
Speaker
In the actual system, it says... ah For Scratch, let me pull up Scratch. Okay, well... It well, 9100 blows up the universe.
00:05:45
Speaker
Okay, sorry guys, world's ending. Bye! Sammy's gonna, like, ask the but two monkeys. this you guys, is it just the two you here? Isn't there usually, like, a third green monkey that kind of, you know, and and the I think this like you know there's usually, like, a red monkey, a blue one, and a green one.
00:06:06
Speaker
That's, like, a thing, right?
00:06:09
Speaker
uh that's awfully rixist of you to say but um but now that you mention it now that you mention it yes uh uh uh jared is at the uh at the temple right now so he wasn't able to make it no i do apologize i didn't have to come out like that i just you know it Oh, I figured as much. That's why I didn't really take offense to her, I think. but You know, I'm real sorry. what ah Here, let me make it up. to what's what's What's your name?
00:06:42
Speaker
My name Sprigatito. Sprigatito the Yeah, that's
00:07:00
Speaker
Wow. Well, Spregatito, you've been real kind. i'm on I thank you so much for helping us. You've been such a big help. Of course. Yeah. Yeah, of course.
00:07:13
Speaker
As long as you don't get my bad side, I don't really care what you do. And he's like, well, have a good one. I'm getting back to this. And he dusters towards his drink. Spregatito turns back to drink his Tito's vodka.
00:07:27
Speaker
Yes, he sure does.
00:07:33
Speaker
Okay. So I guess Hikaru wanted to go talk to the bartender then? Uh, sure. We'll do that. Yeah, I want to see if i can if I can buy a couple berries off of them.
00:07:45
Speaker
You want to buy some berries off of them? Maybe. are you Are you asking that to the bartender? Not yet, no. I'm just doing some exposition.
00:07:57
Speaker
Um, yeah Hey, um, excuse me, Mr. Mr. or Mrs. Bartender. Yeah, the Lucario looks at you is like, uh,
00:08:12
Speaker
you can call me, what's my name again? ah My name is, uh, my name is Zekrom.
00:08:25
Speaker
Zekrom. Zekrom the Lucario. Alright. This bar just fills his Pokemon name to other Pokemon names. And Zekrom isn't even supposed to exist.
00:08:38
Speaker
Nobody knows about Zekrom. It's a made up name, I guess. Yeah. yeah yeah My name is made up. Trust me. It doesn't mean anything. Don't look into it. Please don't. It doesn't mean anything. Don't look into it. Okay, anyway, what do you want?
00:08:53
Speaker
He whispers underneath his breath. Oh, I know a thing or two about it. I know a thing or two about it. is I eat all the pizzas at my family's pizzeria all the time, and they don't even know. So, like, we we'll make a pizza, and I'll eat, like, five or six slices out of it before we send it away.
00:09:12
Speaker
Hold on a second. Wait, what? You're like, hold a second. We've got back that train up. um so So, hold on. When Sammy makes pizzas for, like, his... You ever see, like, un lies or yeah ever see online where like people will like make a pizza and then like cut a whole slice out and then squish it back together? That's exactly what I was thinking of.
00:09:38
Speaker
It's just a that, but literally half the pizza is gone, and it's like every other eighth slice of pizza is just missing. So what we do is, like, what end up doing, right? Like, they'll order a large pizza, they'll and I'll deliver to them, and I'll be like, hey, you know, here's your small pizza, and they're like, oh, I guess I did order a small pizza.
00:09:55
Speaker
Here you go, here's your money for a large pizza. So do you serve it to them with no crust, or do you, like, take a circle out of the middle? What? That was just like a slice or two. I think I said five, but that's an exaggeration.
00:10:11
Speaker
my gosh. So yeah, if you cut like us to make a large pizza into a small pizza, you have to like cut all the outsides out, right? So there's no crust. So do you just serve it to with no crust? Or do you do the inverse? No, What he does is he just takes... He takes like...
00:10:29
Speaker
He just takes like a quarter of the pizza out of the middle. Like how he just like cuts the middle out and then smushes the tube. You just like cut a line of middle pizza middle out. Yeah.
00:10:43
Speaker
Eli gets it. You scoop out the middle and just stretch. No. You take the pizza cutter. You have to line, a line, and you take that piece out, and then you put the rest of the pizza together. Oh, sorry. I couldn't say that with a straight face. Oh, my God.
00:11:02
Speaker
Wow, that sounds telecomplicated. It's telecomplicated. You just take strip of pizza out and then push the rest together. Why can't I say that with a straight face? It just happens to be like a quarter of the pizza, or half the pizza sometimes. Everyone helps.
00:11:20
Speaker
Hungry. oh I know before I move past it, but you take a circle out of the center, it just strips the pizza inwards. not a circle! Not circle! Just a strip.
00:11:32
Speaker
You make two straight lines through the pizza, yeah and then you take that strip out. No! What? Oh, I assume you mean. Yeah, you take two straight lines.
00:11:43
Speaker
No, not ah sign i like a Like Oh? oh Is there like another circle in the middle? there isn't Forget about circles. No circles. The pizza's not cut.
00:11:55
Speaker
When you're cutting the pizza, you do one straight line in the middle, and then another straight line next to it, and then you pull that strip out. I see. Okay, so it leaves an oval.
00:12:06
Speaker
I thought you were going do that, yeah but in both directions, vertical horizontal. No. Two vertical lines, and then you take that strip out, and then you smush the pizzas. The question is, the does Sammy serve square pizzas?
00:12:19
Speaker
Because that would be much easier to do if they were square pizzas. It depends on the occasion. doesn't even matter. As long as your lines are equidistant from the center, it still becomes another circle when you push it together.
00:12:33
Speaker
I love this. I love this so much. right good Okay, now we've got the riveting discussion of stretching and altering pizzas out of the way. Let's get back to the bar.
00:12:45
Speaker
So you guys are, like, having this whole discussion, and, like, the the Lucario is trying to butt in, and he's like, I... Wait, what discussion? i'm not We weren't discussing this amongst the party. I just told him, hey, I get it.
00:12:58
Speaker
I take a little bit of pizza out before i deliver it. and That's kind of illegal. Sorry, that... i was no okay that's fine but i was just like imagining that like you said hey i do something illegal and like he would never have like this whole discussion okay that's fine so yeah you say that uh you tell right so fuck i can't crap we've broken him You have broken me. um I didn't think it was that hard to understand. i'm yeah I'm glad Eli was on the same page.
00:13:31
Speaker
Sorry. Sorry, I got the image of you stretching pizza. At least one of us knew what the videos that Sean was talking about were like. Hold on.
00:13:44
Speaker
Give me a second. I've got to take my hoodie off. of I think I remember seeing this in the Amazing World of Gumball where Richard got a job at a pizza place and did the same exact thing. What's the amazing world of Gumball?
00:13:56
Speaker
okay let' Out of character! I'm not answering that question unless you actually mean it. Out of character, whatever. So, Zekrom, I'm in the back you guys, and he's my big... Walter, real quick, you don't mind.
00:14:12
Speaker
I take it your last name is the same as your mother's, correct? Oh, yeah. Your name is... And his name is John Cena! No!
00:14:23
Speaker
Hey guys, Future Dakota here. um This is the start of segment two of this episode where we'll be telling stories that have not yet been released on the podcast. So, all new content from here on out, but I do have to give you a warning. The reason they were never uploaded to feed is a lot of this audio is echoey, and it was audio that could not be repaired.
00:14:44
Speaker
So, keep that in mind while listening. The audio quality on this is not great, but the stories are really good. So, um... Just bear with me and deal with it.
00:14:56
Speaker
So, have fun!
Travel Stories and Misadventures
00:15:00
Speaker
Alright, now we're here for adventures in the Alsace region of France. And I was there with a group called American Music Abroad.
00:15:13
Speaker
It was a group that took high school musicians to play in bunch of concerts over in Europe playing American music and... It was a fun trip, but nice interesting thing that happened. We were visiting a cathedral in the Alsace region of France, and we were supposed to be going on a walking tour right after.
00:15:39
Speaker
So I was going through the cathedral, taking pictures, checking out all the cool stuff, looking at all the stained glass, all the organs in there.
00:15:50
Speaker
And at one point, I looked around and didn't see anybody from the trip. So, yeah, they they they just sort of left me there at the cathedral and...
00:16:06
Speaker
went on the walking tour without me so I just spent another like an extra two hours at the cathedral before ae they came back for me and brought me to the hotel.
00:16:20
Speaker
They're just like there you are and just plucked you up and took you along.
00:16:28
Speaker
yeah so did you find out why they lost you? What happened? Why did they abandon you? So be everyone was getting... aye There was over 100 people on the trip, so everyone was getting into small groups for the tours, and my group for the tour just didn't notice that I was not there until they were already left on the tour.
00:17:01
Speaker
Jeez. Wow. Okay. Damn, completely forgotten. Yeah. Did you happen to see an Evelyn while you were out there headbutting children in the park? I did not. Troke slam.
00:17:15
Speaker
But, yeah, one of my friends on the trip later told me that when they noticed that I wasn't there, he was like, yeah, he's probably still back at the cathedral taking pictures. Yeah.
00:17:29
Speaker
And he was exactly right. and
00:17:35
Speaker
Yeah, how old were you at this point? i but Summer between sophomore year and junior year of high school. was imagining you were like 10 years old. No.
00:17:47
Speaker
like ten years old okay no Gotcha. Yeah, it was a trip for high school students. Jeez. So I was like 16, think, at the time.
00:18:00
Speaker
So did anything come of it? Like, you literally lost an entire child. Did the teacher get in trouble or something? No, not really.
00:18:13
Speaker
course not. Okay. Because, I mean, it was, there was, i think,
00:18:22
Speaker
what eight adult chaperones who were all different conductors for the groups and so the reason i was on the trip at all was that uh the when it's a music school in my city that has Youth Wind Symphony for high school students and the fan that conductor for that got invited to go on this trip so when the time for the Youth Wind Symphony came around he put out an invitation to anyone who wanted to join to join in and I'm like sure sounds like a fun time
00:19:13
Speaker
Oh man, yeah, that kind of that kind of reminds me of a program my school did. um Every four years, um the entirety of our grade would get to go to either New York City or Disney World, and it swapped in between those two every ah four years. and my year, I was supposed to go to New York City.
00:19:34
Speaker
But unfortunately, this thing called COVID happened, and it was the only time that that trip ever got canceled, and it was the year I was supposed to do it. So that was fun.
00:19:45
Speaker
This is similar thing. i was supposed to something very similar to that, but I've been to New York City before, so it's not that big of a deal, but still, kind of a bummer. Mm-hmm.
00:19:56
Speaker
Yeah, when I was in middle school, um they would take the sixth graders on a trip to some YMCA camp in New Jersey. um And then the seventh graders would go on a trip to Boston. And then the eighth graders would go to Washington, DC.
00:20:17
Speaker
Yeah, we have the same thing. Eighth graders go to Washington, DC. I wonder if it's like some curriculum you guys shared. I don't know.
00:20:28
Speaker
It's possible. yeah Well, my school was in Brooklyn. Brooklyn? I'm trying to remember where Brooklyn is. but That's a part of New York City, right?
00:20:38
Speaker
It is. It's one of the boroughs. Okay, I couldn't remember because I know there's like Manhattan, there's Brooklyn, there's the Queens. Queens, yeah, that's one of them.
00:20:51
Speaker
Brooklyn's a place that people in New York are afraid to go to, used to be. Really? and you guess the other two? The other two? Oh my god. ah Let me think.
00:21:03
Speaker
There's... I'm assuming it's like the metropolitan area? Question mark? ah Well, just that just the five boroughs of New York City itself. itself The five boroughs of New York city Brooklyn Nine-Nine. Maybe I just said Brooklyn, Queens, Manhattan.
00:21:22
Speaker
Oh god, I'm trying to see the map of New York City in my head. I'm gonna know it as soon as you say but I got nothing. and
00:21:32
Speaker
Okay, there's another B. another b
00:21:36
Speaker
bre Bronx? Bronx, yes. Bronx. Yeah, bronx yeah yeah the Bronx. There's the Bronx. And then there's... Thought we had five.
00:21:48
Speaker
Manhattan, Bronx, Brooklyn, Queens, and... Manhattan. Manhattan, that's four. Right.
00:22:02
Speaker
And the fifth one is the Pokemon Center in Manhattan. It's its own borough. don't know. Its own borough, yeah. I generally don't know. I don't know too much too much about New York City.
00:22:15
Speaker
No. Me neither. It's Manhattan, Brooklyn, the Bronx, Queens, South Island. Staten Island is a borough? Yes. Isn't that the immigration island?
00:22:28
Speaker
it's it's It's technically a borough of New York. That's not a borough. Yeah, it's just like physically closer and culturally closer. closer to like to like the nearby parts of New Jersey.
00:22:44
Speaker
Is anyone living on Staten Island I thought that was isn't that the the place where the immigrants went to? Is that like the immigration office? No. Ellis Island. Ellis Island. That's what was thinking about. They basically went innie me innie miney mouth what's the island was going to be the next the last Bureau of
00:23:03
Speaker
Okay. ah I don't blame you though. Staten Island, it just doesn't feel like a part of the city. I don't know Staten Island. They have to take a boat to get there. I
00:23:16
Speaker
i bet there's people who in New York who have to take ferries to go to work to and every day. i don't know if that'd be great or miserable. That'd be miserable. Well, you probably wouldn't have to deal with as much traffic.
00:23:31
Speaker
this traffic don lets keep boat travel Fun fact, when they built the Verrazano Bridge connecting Brooklyn and Staten Island, Robert Moses intentionally designed it so that trains couldn't fit on it.
00:23:44
Speaker
Why? and Did he have a beef against trains? I don't know what to tell ya. okay Okay, sure. He just, like, loved cars.
00:23:56
Speaker
It's like, darn all those trains and their inefficiency, we need more pollution in this air. I shall build this bridge, but no efficiency will come from it.
00:24:09
Speaker
That is my law. You know the fast walks they have at airports? You know the fast walks they have at airports? don't we just have that everywhere? Just replace all the sidewalks in New York City with fast walks. Oh my god. and No one would take their cars.
00:24:25
Speaker
It'd be so one would ever use their cars again. You're just going like 30 miles an hour down the road just walking. Honestly, like people would. That'd be so fun. That'd be so fun and. Oh my god.
00:24:37
Speaker
A lot better. Kids would be playing around on it all the time. Jesus. There'd have to so much maintenance on it, though, with how many people be on it. I know. it's kind of like It's kind of like why the Hyperloop isn't really going to be a thing, or at least I seriously doubt it's going be Have you guys heard of the Hyperloop?
00:24:52
Speaker
Nope. Okay, so the Hyperloop is a train that is sealed in a vacuum tube. um Like a bullet train?
00:25:04
Speaker
Yes, it's basically a bullet train, but it's supposed to go faster because it's in a nearly frictionless vacuum tube underground. Listen, now there's no point why we need that. like If it bumps any and hits the wall at all like when they're on the ground, and that speed is killing everything.
00:25:23
Speaker
Yeah, that's rapid decompression. Everyone's just insta-dead. don't think we need a bullet train in the first place. We just need regular trains. The maintenance cost. my god.
00:25:35
Speaker
Could you imagine just one slight little pinprick and it's just like a balloon deflating. The whole hyper-over is going down. It's going to cost like billions of dollars. Think of this. If a chunk of rock falls in the cave and like gets in the way of the roadway and then they The thing goes over and makes it shake a little bit. It is not going to have... It's going to be so fast it's going to be able to get steady again. Well, the thing is, the entire tunnel is made of like solid vacuum-sealed metal.
Camping and Childhood Stories
00:26:03
Speaker
like It's not cheap. like it There's no point of it. There is no point of it. It's so ineffective just because of the sheer cost and maintenance and how many things could go wrong.
00:26:19
Speaker
Honestly... Hear me out. Hear me out. For overseas travels. You know those fast walks? Just do that. Just find a way to make... oh Yeah, find that. But since pete it takes a while, have like pit stops for hotels over the ocean.
00:26:33
Speaker
you know You know how to you know the people make their own name the people who made their own nation because they made like their own little like metal town and so it technically became a nation? A metal town? Yeah, people built something on the water and made their own nation.
00:26:49
Speaker
Because it was an international water. Yeah, so it was an oil rig. and An oil rig off of England became a sovereign nation.
00:27:02
Speaker
Still, it could be the same thing. It could just do what they just make it oil like an oil rig type like hotel.
00:27:10
Speaker
Huh. I don't know. I love the idea, though, of just fast walk across the entire Pacific Ocean. You're just walking for, like, 40 hours just straight. If you do a great workout, there's either the walk option or the place that just lets you sit down while you go you do girlrs walking You're just walking, in because you're just walking, and, like, during the middle of the night, you just step over some homeless dude who fell asleep on the fast walk.
00:27:35
Speaker
Oh, my God. That'd be so bad. he a dude A dude was, go like, spent like two days going there. fell asleep accidentally rolled on the other platform that's gone the other opposite way went back to the start i feel so bad hoodie gets snagged on the uh end of the escal fast walk or even funnier half of him's on one side half him's on the other and he's just eternally spinning you spin me right okay this all right this one's gone on long enough we'll see you guys next time guys
00:28:09
Speaker
Oh, that was my view. alright went for the one up yes I was waiting for the one. was waiting for one. I got no name for it, but this is what happens.
00:28:19
Speaker
No, this is not acceptable. Come up with a name for this. Even if it's a bad one. can a bad Disaster at camp.
00:28:30
Speaker
We're not even at a camp, but we but we did camp.
00:28:35
Speaker
Disaster while camping. There we go. Disaster while camping. right. All right. So my family, we like going outdoors, but we don't really like like going far out.
00:28:46
Speaker
So we used to, we had a little path we dug. Like, we'd remove branches, mow down there, like, make a little path we could just camp out there, like, with own fire. So we went there, had s'mores and everything, went to bed.
00:29:01
Speaker
We wake up, me and my sisters, we wake up to our family, to my mom and dad, gone. Gone. Just gone. just Gone. It's heavy raining. There's a tear in the top of our tents of water just pouring in on us.
00:29:17
Speaker
We go inside. Suddenly you hear footsteps from the corners of the shadows. Side. Side. sorry sorry Open the curtains and you see Bigfoot standing there.
00:29:29
Speaker
Looks like my self-conscience. um Sorry, just had to state the obvious. We go look for my parents. They're not anywhere. They're not in their tent. They're not anything. like Their stuff's gone. Alright, so we go inside and we find them sleeping in their beds all comfy and everything.
00:29:48
Speaker
We wake them up asking for an extra explanation. They tell us that they got called from one of our neighbors that cows got out. I can't remember was ours or someone else, but they got up like at 6 o'clock while it was raining to get the cows. They didn't wake us up or anything. They left.
00:30:06
Speaker
got They put the cows up in like an hour. know they They said they saw the heavy rain and how bad it was getting. They didn't want to take a risk even wet. So they went inside to go to bed.
00:30:19
Speaker
Didn't tell us about it. Meanwhile were there soaks? Well, hold on were you guys getting excuse me were you guys getting soaked in your tent?
00:30:29
Speaker
Yes, we woke up to a tear in our tent Oh, God. Okay, well, that's different. Okay. I thought it was just like your parents didn't want to put their soaking wet clothes on, go out to the tent, and just get water everywhere in the tent or something like that. No, no, no.
00:30:44
Speaker
They just left us. um don't know if they saw a tear or anything, but they didn't they didn't want to go back to the tent. and So they just left us. We had to grab all our gear and walk back to the house while it was raining. Well, as we discussed earlier, children's bones, they're made of rubber.
00:31:00
Speaker
And you know rubber's known for? To bein' waterproof. And if there's anything to know about children's bones, it's that they're waterproof. What about hypothermia? Uh, pfft, a little hypothermia never killed anyone.
00:31:13
Speaker
I had a case. We were all had a cold after that day. It's actually kind of funny, because I have a story about hypothermia, but we'll get to that later. Hmm. It was just a bad day Apparently, we found out later, it wasn't our cows, it was the neighbors.
00:31:30
Speaker
But they thought it was my parents, so they got called anyway. Hold on, wait. Your neighbors thought your parents were cows? No, no, no, no. Cows got out, so one of our neighbors called us thinking it was our cows.
00:31:43
Speaker
But it wasn't. Oh, okay. i thought you Sorry, the way you worded that, I thought you said your neighbors. It turns out there were no cows. It was just your parents. No.
00:31:56
Speaker
I'm going to diss them. Damn. But they all were. We never went camping after this. We never trusted them. Every time they said, you want to go camping, we shot them down.
00:32:08
Speaker
but what Are you going to stay this time? No? Didn't think so. What do you mean you never went camping? You guys never we did any family camping ever? no yeah We never went camping after that. We never trusted them again. Wow. How long ago was this?
00:32:23
Speaker
What a sad life. That was about 13 years ago. Oh my god. Not 13, not 13, 12. It was more like 10 years actually. Yeah, 10. twenty was more like kind of about ten years actually at ten Yeah, because like... Still, you haven't been camping in 10 years.
00:32:41
Speaker
I went camping and like two years later with my cousin and my grandpa. Now I'm parents. Okay. I was going to say, because like, outdoors is a huge part of my life. Like, I'm always outdoors. I love hiking. Speaking of Bigfoot, we woke up to a big, big footprint right outside our tent.
00:33:01
Speaker
I'm joking. oh I'm joking. Okay, was going to say... I don't believe it's real, but there was big footprint. I was thinking was some animal that there. Like a deer that just like twirled.
00:33:13
Speaker
A deer's footprint is so big. It's bigger than a man's footprint. How big was this deer? don't know. I rolled out my tent and it was an indent in the ground. Okay, but was it big?
00:33:24
Speaker
Yes. Okay. Well, you- you compared it to a deer, and if there's one- I was just thinking like a deer- It's not having big feet. I was just thinking if deer laid around and just rolled like on the- on the belly.
00:33:37
Speaker
Whatever. It could've been a deer- don't know. Where they just rested.
00:33:44
Speaker
because a deer is going to go up to the front your tent just lay down. that sir what else is they go do course not lay in front your tent That's crazy talk. i don't know I'm just trying to find an explanation why there's an indent in front of our tent down nowhere i don't know maybe it's where you guys were walking around to get inside your tent. Maybe it's where not took I was a left I was the last one in the tent. There was no bump Well, was it nighttime when you guys went to bed? Because it's hard to see an indent on the ground when it's a nighttime.
00:34:17
Speaker
i didn't feel it either, buddy. Oh, so you were specifically feeling the ground around for giant footprints, were you? Listen, old man, you want to go?
00:34:29
Speaker
I'll go right now. you never want to You never want to argue with an idiot. I'll keep going until I'm right. Yeah, well... I guess that just means an unstoppable force is gonna be an immovable object because I can go for like this forever.
00:34:47
Speaker
and then What is that supposed to mean? You better start some fom words, buddy. So you saying something about hypothermia earlier, so I guess I can sort of tangentially tell my story of hypothermia.
00:35:02
Speaker
And I do have a title for this story. And i called this one, The Coldest and Shittiest Night. Because it was, it really was the coldest and shittiest night.
00:35:13
Speaker
It was miserable, right? Could have sworn I was gonna die. That's a new Christmas book.
00:35:20
Speaker
What, the coldest and shittiest night? Yeah, for parents though. a Christmas book. All the children were sleeping. It was a night before Christmas. mans not Not a mouse was stirring, and then Santa decided not to show up.
00:35:34
Speaker
It was a cold and a shitty night. It was the night before Christmas, all through the night. All you could hear was the parents yelling, this night is cold as shit. All you could hear throughout the house was the parents screaming, I want divorce!
00:35:50
Speaker
oh no All you hear is just arguments and arguments. As you lay by the campfire. Not campfire. Bleh. The campfire. I was thinking of the fire that fire pit.
00:36:04
Speaker
god Anyway, to rain us back in. I'm eating a warhead right now. so It's really sour.
00:36:17
Speaker
Sour Patch Kids. a chip I've also got Solar Patch Kids. Let's go! Sour Candy all around. Not currently eating them, but I have them.
00:36:30
Speaker
Oh, I have a bag right here. Yeah, I've got a box right here. i just so I just saw the waveform of me making that noise. I think I just jumpscared everyone.
00:36:46
Speaker
I don't know, if I remember, I might bring that down a little and not ask me. looks like it clips at some point. did I think it did. bumbleed my microphone. Anyway, so the coldest and shittiest night.
00:36:59
Speaker
So this is around the time when I first got my motorcycle. And when I first bought my motorcycle, we got it running and I had this half helmet. You know, it's just the top helmet. It doesn't have any chin support or anything.
00:37:12
Speaker
and And I did not like that. I wanted a full face helmet to get the wind off my face and my bike is really loud and whatever. I just wanted a full face helmet.
00:37:22
Speaker
So I decided the go tojoke to go over to Cleveland, Cleveland, Ohio to get a motorcycle helmet because they had this really nice motorcycle shop there.
00:37:35
Speaker
So I went to Cleveland, Ohio. and there was this, I forgot the name of the shop, it doesn't matter. ended up buying motorcycle helmet. I bought a a phone holder, which ended up being a piece of shit.
00:37:48
Speaker
But I was in Cleveland, so I just decided, f why not? I'm going to go visit Lake Erie.
00:37:56
Speaker
So I ended up driving up to, i think it was like, I want to say it's like Rose Park, I think that's what it was called. It doesn't matter. But but I was going to park my motorcycle here, right on the edge of the lake basically.
00:38:14
Speaker
Oh yeah, it was, because that's where we saw the fireworks that last time. For the 4th of July. Anywho. um So I got to park my motorcycle and like a stupid idiot, I ended up dumping my bike.
00:38:26
Speaker
And ended up breaking I ended up breaking my clutch handle. Now, this next part's gonna sound like it came out of like a cartoon, but I get on my phone and I just start looking around because I can tend to clutch handle really quickly. I've got some tools on the back of my motorcycle because it's got like a little storage compartment under my seat.
00:38:46
Speaker
Then I keep a bunch of tools and stuff. Anyhow, um so I get on my phone and look for like all the motorcycle shops around and all of the shops are around. Keep in mind, this is a Friday.
00:38:58
Speaker
um All of the shops around Was it a Friday? I think it was a Friday. I don't know. But all the shops around ended up closing at around 6 p.m. Do you want to know what time it was?
00:39:10
Speaker
It was 5.59 p.m.
00:39:14
Speaker
walk walk I swear it sounds like something out of a cartoon or something. Did you call them like a riot before they closed? would have come to you. I would have helped.
00:39:25
Speaker
No. Sorry, we closed early. Turn below, be quiet. The cat is screaming. Now, quit screaming. Now, he's being loud. So I called the cat. I don't call anyone, sorry.
00:39:36
Speaker
I um look on my phone, like all the there's no shops around me that are open at this point. So at this point, I am like 100 miles away from home and I'm stranded in Cleveland, and no way to go home because you can't, obviously you can't drive without a clutch.
00:39:51
Speaker
And but so I'm just like, great. right I don't have the money for a hotel. participant ah just spent my paycheck on a brand new helmet.
00:40:03
Speaker
And so am now stuck in Cleveland on Lake Erie. um Thankfully, it was like late spring at this point. So it wasn't terribly cold, but it got down to like 50 degrees that night or something like that.
00:40:19
Speaker
And I ended up, ah I ended up, ah god I got to stop yelling. i ended up just laying on my bike half the night and I just couldn't go to sleep because at this point I was working night shift.
00:40:33
Speaker
For, well, I was about to say the company, I'm not going to indulge that. um For the company I was working with, I was working night shift at the time. And my shift was, I want to say, yeah, 7 p.m. to 5.30 a.m. m So it was like like the worst night shift you can imagine.
00:40:52
Speaker
So end up, oh, because so this is like like typically morning for me at that point. So I'm just like, great, I'm stuck in Cleveland for the entire night. So I called work. I'm like, hey, I'm not going be able to make it into work tomorrow because I'm stuck in Cleveland for the next couple of days or whatever.
00:41:08
Speaker
So I end up just having to walk around Cleveland, entertaining myself for the entire night. And I'm just like walking up and down downtown Cleveland. It's very pretty.
00:41:21
Speaker
And ended up like, it was at that point I remembered that I had no food or water. And so for the little money I did have, I ended up going to some like really cheap restaurants and stuff. And I like bought a case of bottled water that I put my backpack that I had on me.
00:41:41
Speaker
And at some point, I ended up returning back to the lake, and I ended up just laying on my motorcycle and, like, put my feet up on the dashboard. It just, like, laid down on my bike, because apparently you can do that.
00:41:53
Speaker
And I tried going to sleep just to pass the night, but I just could not because my body was conditioned for night shift at that time. So I ended up just staying there the entire night. At that point, i was, uh, the night passed. I was awake for about 12 hours, which is pretty standard.
00:42:08
Speaker
Would you quit your screaming? My cat is being so loud. Holy cow. Geez. I'm sure you hear in the background. Yeah, you.
00:42:18
Speaker
You. What are you doing, buddy? Hmm? You're being so loud. Hold it. Anyhow, so at this point it's morning and this is around the time I usually go to sleep.
00:42:31
Speaker
It's like 6am in the morning, sun's coming out or whatever. And i start calling around some different shops theyre like, nope, don't have this, nope, don't have this. I finally find a shop and I have to walk off the six miles to the motorcycle shop, which takes for ever And I finally get there and I talk to him, to the guy. There's just this one dude running this rinky-dinky little shop. He's like, yeah, let me see if I can find a clutch handle for you.
00:43:03
Speaker
And he's like, do you have any pictures of the damage? And I'm like, no, who? He's like, ah, I don't know what handle you need. And my bike is six miles away at this point.
00:43:15
Speaker
So he's like, hmm, let me see. So I tell him what bike I have. try figure some stuff out. He has two clutch handles. So he literally just sends me on my way with these two clutch handles for absolutely free.
00:43:28
Speaker
And i end up walking six more miles all the way back. And at that point, it's getting to like late afternoon. i stopped at a restaurant at some point during the day. i had run through my bottle of water that I had brought with And...
00:43:42
Speaker
and At that point I had been awake for about 20 hours or something like that and i finally get back to my motorcycle. I don't have the right tool to install it.
00:43:55
Speaker
So I had to look up on my phone a hardware store around me so I could find an actual screwdriver that I could use on my clutch handle.
00:44:07
Speaker
Because there's one specific bolt that's holding it I could undo everything cause i'd like a crystal wrench. and a flathead screwdriver. but Quick question. there was two big big what Why don't you just roll the bike with you while you're walking?
00:44:20
Speaker
Dude, my bike weighs almost 700 pounds. It's a big, big bike. Seems like a you problem. that's It's not that easy, especially when going uphill. I would never be able to push that thing a tenth of a mile.
00:44:37
Speaker
Those things are not that easy to roll around. They're not like bicycles. it It's like trying to push a car. Except you're trying to balance it the whole time.
00:44:49
Speaker
So, I end up looking around, there's an Ace Hardware near me, so i end up going there, buying a screwdriver, and at this point I'm extremely worried that I don't have the money to buy anything else without delving into my like my credit cards.
00:45:03
Speaker
So, I end up getting back... Finally, I don't remember how far it was, but it was another couple hours I got back to my bike. Thank God it was not stolen because this is in the middle of Cleveland. And there's like that song about Cleveland.
00:45:16
Speaker
And literally, there's like ah ah there was like an old promotional song about Cleveland. And one of the lyrics is like, don't go to West Cleveland or you'll die. It's like this whole thing. Cleveland's not a great city.
00:45:28
Speaker
um So I finally got back to my motorcycle. Shout out to all our Cleveland viewers. I hope you don't live in West Cleveland or I feel bad for you. get back to my bike. I've been awake for about 24 hours at this point and I still have like 100 to drive home.
00:45:45
Speaker
So, I finally get this clutch installed and I called the shop I'm hey i got installed, can I can drive over and pay for it. And he's like, nah don't worry about it, you've had enough trouble today.
00:45:57
Speaker
And I'm like, thank you for god's sake. So yeah, he actually just gave me the whole clutch handle for free. It doesn't fit properly, but it functioned and that's what mattered.
00:46:08
Speaker
So, I finally got my clutch handle going and I can finally go home. So I finally get on the freeway and at this point it's like 8pm or something and it's dark again.
00:46:20
Speaker
And I've been awake for like I said like 24 hours or something like that. The hours are fuzzy to me so it was about a year ago that this happened.
00:46:29
Speaker
And I finally get back on the road. And at this point it's like 40 degrees outside and all I have is a hoodie and a t-shirt on. Now, I don't know if you've heard this, but there's like a kind of like, and know it's not a rule, it's like a rule of thumb.
00:46:45
Speaker
If you're on a motorcycle, if you're going 55 miles an hour, take the current air temperature, decrease it by 20 degrees. That is the current temperature of air that is rushing past at 55 an hour. So have 100 miles home.
00:46:59
Speaker
so i have a hundred miles to go home and it just feels like it's 20 degrees outside with 55 mile an hour winds.
00:47:10
Speaker
And i have to endure this for multiple hours on the freeway. And I was getting so miserably cold, I ended up stopping at a gas station and getting some coffee and I got back on the freeway.
00:47:25
Speaker
And at some point, I just stopped feeling cold. It wasn't until later that I realized that I was getting the beginning stages of hypothermia. Holy cow.
00:47:36
Speaker
And like, I just like, oh, I'm perfectly fine. I must have gotten used to this temperature. So I just went the rest of the way home without stopping. I just felt fine. I also want to point out I didn't have any gloves at that point.
00:47:49
Speaker
So my hands were like nearly numb of the entire time. Oh no. why no Why not? Why not wear gloves, you know? Because I was really cheap. I didn't have my full redding gear like I do today.
00:48:02
Speaker
should never run that bike until you're hand fully prepared. Ah, I didn't care back then. I'm still alive now. No point in dwelling on the past. So, I finally get home, and I lay down in bed and fall asleep instantaneously. But I, like, at some point during the day, because I slept during on the day at that point, I woke up in some, like, heavy sweats for some reason.
00:48:26
Speaker
I don't know if it has something to do with hypothermia, or the fact that I had just then gone 28 hours without sleep. But I ah be both was so miserable. i felt like I had a fever for the next two days. ended up having to call out of work.
00:48:43
Speaker
And that was the day I ended up getting... The day and a half, two days, ended up getting stranded in Cleveland because I stupidly dumped my bike. So, yeah, that is the coldest and shittiest night.
00:48:59
Speaker
So you're telling me that entire thing was because you had skill issues. Exactly, because I'd only been riding for a couple weeks at that point. And you drove 100 miles away.
00:49:11
Speaker
It doesn't help a that my first bike was 750, which I should not have started on. Like, you're supposed to start on a much smaller bike, like a 250 or like 500. I went for the big bike right at the start.
00:49:25
Speaker
And that did not help me at all. So, yeah, that happened. I'm still alive, but I very much could have died that day.
00:49:37
Speaker
From multiple factors. Oh, stop being dramatic. Oh, stop being dramatic. Okay, thanks. If you were on there, you probably would have died before I did. It was only my sheer will that I survived.
00:49:51
Speaker
Brother, you want to compare wills. Let's go.
00:49:55
Speaker
Anyway, that'll do it for this episode. This one's a double-length episode. I didn't expect my story to go on for so long, so we will see you guys in the next one. Yeah, me neither. ha What? one She got mad. I also didn't expect video audio to go on for 22 minutes. I did not expect it to go on that long.
00:50:15
Speaker
I didn't expect my story to go so long. You did it, Dakota. You made her shout at someone. Anyway, we'll see you guys next time.
00:50:25
Speaker
I call this the pasture rumble. So... Pasture rumble. I'm going in my southern accent. Or country accent. Whatever one.
00:50:37
Speaker
So imagine this. Just a wee kid. Seven year old kid. I see my mom and sister go out because they want check on cows in our pasture.
00:50:48
Speaker
I'm like, that seems fun. i just got done with all my feeding with my pigs. So I thought I'd go and hop the fence. Start walking towards them. and Then I see my cow. A cow that I've raised into a little calf.
00:51:02
Speaker
I've gone up to scratch the cow. I've showed the cow in shows. I walk by it. It must have thought I was getting too close to its baby calf that it had with it because it was a mother.
00:51:13
Speaker
It charged me like a bull and threw me in the air and pinned me to the ground. I just hear... cow Yeah. Wow. It was like, yeah it was beating me on the ground. and I see, yeah, you see my mom like full on.
00:51:28
Speaker
She just grabbed a random pipe on the ground and just like, not a pipe pipe, but like one of the rubber pipes, like pipes that move through water in it. Like the plastic pipes. She found rubber hose.
00:51:39
Speaker
No, was like a plastic pipe. And she just started wailing on the sucker. Is a lead, a metal, is a rubber? It's plastic, buddy. Don't make me...
00:51:50
Speaker
Okay, it's a PVC pipe. Yeah. She started beating on it, and then the cow moved away, and then it's like he called backca because it because ran, and three other cows joined it, and it started like slowly approaching my mom.
00:52:04
Speaker
My mom full-on fireman carried me and chucked me over the fence, and she full-cleared gate. And the cows just looked at us and just sniffed at us like they about charge us again. Jesus Christ.
00:52:17
Speaker
and i see it I was barely, i could barely see because I got beaten up badly. But I see my sister is slowly walking away in the background because my mom forgot her because she was so worried about throwing me over. she like slowly walked to the gate, like the opposite gate where I got in and just opened the gate and closed it with no problem.
00:52:36
Speaker
And ever since that day, I never went into that pasture when we had calves out there. When it was regular cows, sure, I fed them everything. But when there were calves out there, I told my parents no.
00:52:48
Speaker
I was not going out there again. Jesus, did you like break any bones or something? Surprisingly, no. But like it was like... um ah If it had horns, would have died that day because it was like like headbutting me on the ground. like like Back up, hit my with the head down.
00:53:07
Speaker
like it was going for the kill. That's what it sounds like, Jesus. says Yeah, and keep in thought, I raised that little guy since it was born. like I bottle fed it.
00:53:18
Speaker
So I felt so betrayed when that happened. that cow must not be very old then. Cow. Yeah, it was basically i got the cow when I was like six.
00:53:32
Speaker
And you were what? 6.1? I
00:53:37
Speaker
i was stiffen when this happened. Okay. I don't know the rates at which cows grow. So I'm going to assume that's an adult. I want to tell you now, my memory's been fuzzy ever since. With stuff. yeah That cow did... That cow probably did so serious damage, we never went to the doctors.
00:53:56
Speaker
How serious damage? How heavy was the cow? My family did... Oh, God. Oh. What was that? That was a while ago. I'm trying to think. it was like It was a decent-sized cow. It wasn't nothing like ones they sent to the... yeah me like This was a... a dairy cow. It was ah just the one to give birth to, so...
00:54:19
Speaker
an average weight, like a thousand, like around that. Well, calf and cows um turn into dairy cows afterwards because they have to actually give a calf an order to produce milk.
00:54:32
Speaker
It depends on what kind of breed it is because different breeds can weigh different stuff.
Farm Life and Motorcycle Mishaps
00:54:38
Speaker
I actually don't know the breed of cows that was on Mr. Wilson's farm, which is the one I was a farmhand on, but it was just like the stereotypical white and brown cows.
00:54:48
Speaker
Yeah, my cow was the black and white one. It had white and its white face, like white like pageant face with black all over it. Yeah, it's not like we had anything fancy like Highland cows or anything.
00:55:00
Speaker
Oh, I can only imagine those. Oh, go ahead. How bad did you get hurt? I was out for the rest of the day
00:55:10
Speaker
Like knocked out? No, no, no. I was i was gassed. like It knocked the air out of me. like My mom... oops surprisingly enough, I did more, I got more damage when my mom chucked me over the fence.
00:55:24
Speaker
That's funny. Your mom did more damage to you than the cows did. Yeah, we were all surprised at how little damage is. Like, we all thought it was going for the kill, but some of us think like it was just trying to scare me and not hit me. Your mom saw the cow doing damage and she had to join in. She picked you up and spiked you over the fence.
00:55:41
Speaker
Honestly, like, she like grabbed me by, you know how they grab you like by your arms, like on your armpit? She grabbed me just threw me over.
00:55:50
Speaker
yeah just absolutely yeeted you over the fence yeah i was on the ground like what just happened those things are terrifying though like i don't know i guess to another person that would if my mom wasn't there i was i would die that day would have been dead had to i've had to herd cows before those things are terrifying so if i i've had to lead one through a like when it rained and they got out i had a oh it's another story i have But that's for another story about cows.
00:56:20
Speaker
i heard that um I've heard that like kids don't get as hurt from these kinds of things. Because their bones are rubber. Right, yeah. And they're also way less. I was in Paris once and um and like i I was like playing around in these they're not rocks, they're like metal sculpture thingies with my friend and then I like I crashed into a kid who was there and I was like so scared.
00:56:52
Speaker
Hold on. um Wait, wait, wait. You crashed into You ran someone over? i don't know no. Hit and Yeah, i um I was running around in circles and I just like oh ran into this kid. This has gone from a cow fight to hit and run.
00:57:11
Speaker
This younger Evelyn, not current day Evelyn. I thought you were just admitting to murdering a kid. This was last year.
00:57:23
Speaker
year? why were you taking on that running Why were you running in circles? because it was fun
00:57:34
Speaker
I think the kid was like playing hide and seek with us. With me and my friend. Normal Evelyn activities. Let me go to the park in Paris. Run in circles and run kids over. she just chokeslammed that kid.
00:57:47
Speaker
Yeah, so I i like profusely apologized to the kid, but he my friend was like, I crash into kids all the time. What do you mean you crash into kids all the time?
00:58:00
Speaker
She's got a wanted poster there. He like was teaching English at a Spanish school at the time, a school in rural Spain. and The kid was?
00:58:13
Speaker
but no No, my friend! Oh, sorry go continue. Yeah, OK, so and like he works with these he works with these like elementary and middle school kids and he tells me like, oh, they get like they bump into things all the time and it don't it doesn't hurt as much as it does for adults. um He was like, ah that kid's going to be fine.
00:58:40
Speaker
To be perfectly serious, I think it has... I've heard of this before, and I think it has something to do with the fact that kids go limp when they get hurt, rather than like stiffening up or like reacting to it or whatever.
00:58:51
Speaker
I'm not sure of the exact science behind it, but for some reason I just have a vague memory of why kids tend to go limp when they get hit, and that really reduces the impact of the... Well, impact.
00:59:04
Speaker
don't how much you can reduce the impact of a cow headbutting somebody. I don't know how much you can reduce the impact of an Evelyn hitting somebody. Watch out, watch out, watch out!
00:59:21
Speaker
Alright, that's all for this story. here yougo We'll see you guys next time. Okay, so I'm going to start this off, and this story is called i Set My Motorcycle On Fire!
00:59:35
Speaker
Great starter. Yes. so god what So I and that's not it's not like an actual like oh I broke my bike blah blah blah it's not exaggeration. I literally set my motorcycle on fire a couple days ago.
00:59:51
Speaker
So what ended up happening, and I have to have a little bit of a preamble here, because when I first bought this bike, most of the electricals on it do not function.
01:00:02
Speaker
So like the brake lights did not function. The daylight running lights did not function. None of the turn signals function. The headlight did work. So why'd you buy it? I bought it for 500 bucks and i the engine was perfectly sound. The engine itself was worth more than that.
01:00:21
Speaker
And me my brother fixed it up and it ran perfectly fine. I'm still driving it around to this day. Like, I was literally on it earlier today. So it still works? Yeah, it runs flawlessly.
01:00:33
Speaker
It survives with the fire and the flames. Oh yeah, and the tachometer doesn't work. But, uh... um Right, so because i go to work so early, i go to i head out to work at about 4am, it is dark outside, and I have to have daytime running ways because my bike is black, I wear a leather jacket for wind resistance and a black helmet, so I am invisible if I don't have some kind of light on me.
01:01:02
Speaker
So what I did is I I don't know if you guys see, I actually have them right here. Um, but I have these little tea lights that are controlled by an L by a remote that you can turn on and off.
01:01:18
Speaker
And they're just little led tea lights that they' supposed to put like on their table for like, uh, don't know, romantic dinner or something. They're meant to be put in like mason jars for like a electric candle or something.
01:01:30
Speaker
But what I did is i stuck two of these things behind my taillight cover and I used the remote to turn it on and off whenever I get on the bike. Okay.
01:01:42
Speaker
And this, I've been, no, no, no. This worked for the last year and a half since I bought this bike. I've been consistently doing this and it works flawlessly.
01:01:55
Speaker
Like it was perfect. The only thing is, and this is an important fact ah that we're going to, that we're going to get onto later. The way I kept those tea lights in place is I crumpled up.
01:02:07
Speaker
like a bunch of paper towels and I stuffed them in my taillight to keep them in place. they would always stay in place. so Fire and paper towels. What a great combination, Dakota.
01:02:19
Speaker
What a great combination. so So just recently, I had my motorcycle in the shop. And they were just doing the... They were replacing the master cylinder. My brakes were getting weak. had to get my brake fluid flushed and changed anyway.
01:02:34
Speaker
And I don't have the tools to do that. But on top of that, for I don't know why they did that. They fixed up my electricals for free. Which I am very grateful for them. doing that.
01:02:46
Speaker
And um so everything works on it now except for the tachometer and the turn the turn signals. So my brake lights work, my daytime running lights work flawlessly, and everything's working like it's supposed to be except for the things I just said.
01:02:59
Speaker
So however... One thing I have to note is the motorcycle I have is a 1983 Yamaha XJ750 Midnight Max.
01:03:10
Speaker
Okay? And the reason that's important is because the LED... Not the l LED. The bulbs that these see that are in the taillights... If you can imagine an old light bulb, that's what they were. They were incandescent bulbs.
01:03:27
Speaker
And if you know anything on incandescent bulbs, they get really hot. So I was driving home from the shop on my motorcycle and I was like, huh, something smells like it's burning. And i my taillights are on the back of my bike. So I can't like, I can't like see that anything.
01:03:51
Speaker
I can't like, I don't know. It was really, so I get home and I'm like, huh, smells like my clutch burning or something. I wasn't running it that hard. So I get off my bike, I'm at home, and I just take a quick look around, and I open up my little oil plug to check on my to check on my clutch <unk>t plates, and everything seemed fine, the smell was not coming from there, and i finally make up my way to the back, where the smell is coming from my taillights.
01:04:22
Speaker
And if you can put two and two together, you probably already know what happened. But I unscrewed the taillights to check on it, and a billow of smoke just comes flying out of it. and What a surprise.
01:04:36
Speaker
All the paper towels that I had used to prop up my taillights were charred and powdery. They were black and powdery, just completely burnt to a c crisp.
Travel Challenges and Flight Changes
01:04:46
Speaker
So what?
01:04:48
Speaker
So I want to paint a picture of what the driver is behind me. So and um crazy man. So this what they saw was a motorcycle going down the road with a plume of smoke coming out of the taillights as I'm going down the road.
01:05:06
Speaker
That's what other people saw the entire time I was heading home. So I'm actually kind of curious if my taillights lit up extra bright because there was a literal fire in my taillights.
01:05:17
Speaker
I'm curious if ah my lights were really bright because of that. I don't think they ever stopped being bright. think they were always on. i think so.
01:05:28
Speaker
um don't think they could ever tell when you were stopping. Yeah, yeah so I finally got home. I take that care of that, and there's just soot everywhere in that case. I had to take some vinegar and a toothbrush clean that whole case out.
01:05:41
Speaker
But my brakes work fine now, and yeah, that's the story of how I set my motorcycle on fire. Did anything else catch fire or just the towels? Thankfully just the towels. I mean the plastic that that was on tealights didn't melt.
01:05:57
Speaker
I've got that sitting in my car right now. So it's just like a plastic lump of plastic. So technically yes, but it didn't spread anywhere.
01:06:08
Speaker
it got to anywhere where oil or gasoline were, you would have went up in flames while you were riding. my god, that would have been disastrous. They thought you were f***er.
01:06:20
Speaker
except i just I just want to know what people thought when i was driving down the road. Just this billow of smoke um after coming out of my bike. that God, that looks so stupid.
01:06:32
Speaker
I'll tell you people on Kind anymore i'm curious. They did not tell you like, hey, you good? Your thing's smoking. Like, I would have honked at you until you pulled over to tell you.
01:06:44
Speaker
I don't even know if I would have heard. My bike is very loud. Oh, would have kept honking. They weren't actually on fire for very long because it does take a bit of time for the light bulbs to heat up and get to the point where they would be burning the paper towel. Yeah.
01:07:00
Speaker
So they were probably actually only burning the paper towels for a couple of minutes. Possibly. of your drive. Well, it is only a 10 minute drive, so... I mean... But also, I know they were on fire because the entirety of the paper towels were just charred to black. There was no paper towel left.
01:07:20
Speaker
Hmm... So... That was fun. That's stupid. Yeah, I know. It's dumb! You'd never put something around a... like the Paper towels, at least. You never put that around...
01:07:35
Speaker
I like that well well do just brake lights haven't been functioning for the last year and a half since I bought the bike me and my brother could never figure it out I still need a call to call the shop and ask them what they did because whatever they did I need to do to my tachometer to you know what I've funny if the fire made it start after the fire just made it start like it fixed it I that would have been that would have been hilarious I don't think that's how that works because the lights would have had to start first in order for the fire to start.
01:08:04
Speaker
Not the other way around. I know, but it would have been funny. What is a tachometer, by the way? Oh, your RPM gauge.
01:08:12
Speaker
And i had just remembered something else. So but i i can tell the ah i can tell the shop never took apart my taillight cover because when they fixed my electricals in the shop, they told me, we got your brake light running and your brakes.
01:08:30
Speaker
and your daytime running lights running, but they're very dim, and we don't know why. And they didn't bother looking into it anything because they weren't getting paid to. I literally just wanted them do master cylinder. The reason why is because there was a wad of paper towels in the way, and they didn't know that.
01:08:48
Speaker
So, yeah. that's the story of um That's the story of how I set my motorcycle on fire. Thanks for listening, guys, and we'll see you on the next one.
01:08:59
Speaker
Oh, hi, everybody. um I'm Evelyn, and this is my story of how I unexpectedly flew to Paris. So recently, i um planned a four-day trip to London to attend an AI conference. um And um it was kind of I was like putting together my travel plans together at the last minute because I procrastinate.
01:09:29
Speaker
Um, and at one point I, um, I like remembered to book my flight. Um, so I went on Google flights and search like flights from New York to London on a certain date range.
01:09:48
Speaker
um And like the cheapest result was there were like not that many there were not that many flights left. um But I found this one flight that would have taken off from JFK. I live in New York City.
01:10:03
Speaker
um From JFK at 1.30 a.m. um Eastern time and landed in London. Am i wrong? I thought JFK was in like Chicago or something.
01:10:18
Speaker
No, no, no, JFK is in eastern Queens. I... Wow, for some reason I thought JFK Airport was like in Chicago or something. Okay. Alright, uh, stupid me, I guess. Continue.
01:10:32
Speaker
So, else lose the jfk
01:10:37
Speaker
So i like like looked for these flights and they were like 900, 700, 500. And I picked the $500 option like nine hundred seven hundred five hundred and i like picked the five hundred dollars option No, maybe it was $560. $560 option for a round trip.
01:10:55
Speaker
And it was through this third-party... this This travel agency website called AirPaz. That sounds official.
01:11:07
Speaker
Yeah. yeah so So, like, I i went through their um their checkout flow, and I was like, oh, wow.
01:11:18
Speaker
Wow, this this process feels really, really straightforward. I wonder, like, I didn't think that booking travel would be this easy. You know our loan system is messed up when something that is easy is just suspicious.
01:11:35
Speaker
If you don't have to go through a cruciating pain, and ain't it's not American. yeah i know like seriously i've tried to book flights because i was trying to find flights for vacation recently and oh my god is it a pain but that's something for another time so so um so i so i checked out um and i i paid with my credit card um and i waited this I did this at like midnight. um and i waited And I waited for like 12 hours to actually
01:12:15
Speaker
to get the tickets. That sounds like American. Yeah, so around I think 1 p.m. the next day, um they finally mailed me my tickets.
01:12:27
Speaker
13 hours later. Like emailed? Emailed, yeah. Okay, I was gonna say, if they actually like physically mailed it to you in 13 hours, then holy crap.
01:12:38
Speaker
That's fast mail. i want whatever those guys are on. Yeah, and I was like frantically Googling. Up until that point, I was like frantically Googling to see... How long did you take to get tickets?
01:12:57
Speaker
if i hit If the website I had just booked tickets through was legit. Why do you do that before? You know, good point. Why didn't you do that before? I don't know. What do you call it? Like Air Faz?
01:13:11
Speaker
Air Paz. air pays Air like P-A-Z. Are you sure it wasn't Air Pez? Are you sure it wasn't run by the candy company? Are you it's Air Place? And then just say Air Place?
01:13:25
Speaker
Like, that sounds so sketchy.
01:13:29
Speaker
Yeah, I thought that, um I don't know, ADHD, I guess. I just i just didn't. Sometimes I forget to do key steps like that.
01:13:41
Speaker
um But yeah, I was going to start a dispute through PayPal and then... Being like, where are my tickets? I knew my i want my money back. And i just booked through i just like booked through the airplane through the airline directly.
01:13:57
Speaker
um and then And then my tickets came. And i I got a refund for the extra tickets that I got for myself. um So what you're saying is you basically got free tickets.
01:14:14
Speaker
No, no. No, what I'm saying is that I... No, the airline would have canceled them. Yeah, I would have... What? What? was going to say, if you bought tickets and then got a refund for them, I'm sure the airline would have canceled your tickets.
01:14:30
Speaker
No, no, no. I bought... um I booked one set of round-trip tickets... um
01:14:39
Speaker
through for myself myself through the um through the travel agency website um and i think what happened was they didn't like automatically book for me they like they like they like slept for 13 hours and then woke up and manually went in and booked the tickets for me i see okay they hacked the airlines i think they yeah And I actually got like, I actually got a $10 credit to use their website.
01:15:14
Speaker
What exactly? You're going to spend $10 on a travel agency website? Well, no, no, no, a $10 discount. So a $10 discount. Okay. They thought that much, but they couldn't put that much effort into the name.
01:15:29
Speaker
Into like automation. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah, that's what was to It seems like like automation for those kind of things is super easy. I'm surprised that TravelHC didn't have that already. Yeah. um yeah so Yeah. So I bought the tickets through them, and then I bought like my own tickets because I wasn't sure if they were going to actually send me my tickets.
01:15:53
Speaker
But then when they sent me when they sent me my tickets, I got a refund for the tickets that I bought directly. I see. Okay. I would use your credit card and you feel... if i I would cancel those credit cards.
01:16:08
Speaker
The credit card you use. Your company is not paying for your flights? I'm unemployed. and Then why are you going to a conference? go Good question.
01:16:21
Speaker
I just felt like it was just an interesting topic. I just wanted to be there. Do you go to conferences trying get job? You could just google it.
01:16:32
Speaker
There's cheaper ways to learn about AI than flying or halfway across the world. She's going there for the connections. She's going there for the connections. Oh, I guess.
01:16:46
Speaker
Also, the conference was technically free, but you were encouraged to donate money. Well, if you're spending $1,000... No, you said it was round trips. If you're spending $500 tickets...
01:16:58
Speaker
Jesus. Well, it was five it was like $500 and then like what are like like whatever I ended up paying for the Airbnb b and food and also the unemployment money that I was giving up by being outside the States. it does It doesn't sound free to me.
01:17:16
Speaker
Not really. That sounds miserable. No, but... You did this for fun? No. i I did this for like the learning experience and for fun and everything.
01:17:29
Speaker
Just go to your local college or something. Yeah, well, I have my reasons. Okay, well, continue on with the story. Anyway. um
01:17:41
Speaker
um
01:17:44
Speaker
So, anyway. Anyway. um Like the day, the day of the flight was like coming up coming off and i was like, am I going to add a check bag or a carry on bag? I wasn't, I was like debating, i was mulling over that for a while. And I finally decided add a carry on bag. carry on And, um, um, and this is North Atlantic. It's not, it's a low cost airline.
01:18:09
Speaker
it doesn't, um,
01:18:13
Speaker
So they they will nickel and dime you for every little thing, including like onboard meals, your carry-on bag, um ye the freaking headphones that usually come with your seat that aren't that great in the I've seen that before.
01:18:31
Speaker
That sounds about right. yeah Yeah. So the carry-on bag was $60 each way $120 Yikes. for a hundred points total yeah Geez.
01:18:43
Speaker
I'd rather go on an airline from Goblin. Goblin Airline. I'd rather just drive across the ocean at this point. like Hey, or, or, if can go back to my idea. love the four knock Yes, we gotta to go back to the fast walks.
01:18:57
Speaker
The fast paths. yeah just Let's just make sidewalks across the Atlantic Ocean, you know? Yeah! Why not? Let's build a giant bridge across the Atlantic Ocean. How hard could that be?
01:19:11
Speaker
you know, tsunamis, earthquakes. like If our plates slightly even go further apart, it's not like the whole thing is going crack and all fall in the ocean. What do you think the chances are of storms happening in the ocean? That will never happen.
01:19:25
Speaker
Nah, hurricanes don't exist. They're just fake news, right? i love some yeah fake news ja fake i hate I hate to burst your bubbles, guys, but um my plane was flying at a little over 950 kilometers an hour.
01:19:44
Speaker
okay i'm sure I'm sure the sidewalks we're about to build at right after this conversation will go at least that fast. Yeah, for the Americans in the audience, that's about 600 miles an hour.
01:19:55
Speaker
Thank you. It is what it Yes, thank you. I think it's like 590. We are all Americans here. Sorry, i used to live in Europe. I'm trying to remember the conversion. Because there's six, hold on. It is almost, it is it's just a little over 60%. So yeah, that's just a tad under, so about 590 miles an hour.
01:20:15
Speaker
Yeah, yeah, yeah. Just about that. Yeah. Yeah, so so I was, anyway, I was paying, i was about to, like, pay for the carry-on bag um through the website.
01:20:29
Speaker
And um
01:20:34
Speaker
my card got declined. Card got declined. Oh no. And then, like, I tried my other cards. I tried every single card that I had on hand, and all of them got declined.
01:20:47
Speaker
And there was no option to, like, pay with PayPal or anything, which would have, like, solved my problem. The JFK airport doesn't, like, have, like, those phone, uh, what are they, IFC, I think is what they're called.
01:21:02
Speaker
This was the website. i I also... oh i eventually went to the airport and tried to pay for it there. Oh, okay. I thought you meant you were at the airport when that happened. No. No, this was like two days before.
01:21:15
Speaker
um okay And there was also this, like... forget what the company was called, but like it was like Afterpay, Karna, something like that. um And... and
01:21:28
Speaker
And, like, I didn't want to... Like, my only other option besides using a credit card would have been to pay through this, like, pay later thing. um And I didn't want to do that because i had just... um I had just frozen my credit file, and I didn't want to unfreeze it so that I could apply for the buy now pay later thing. I see. Okay, so it's basically ah it's a mini credit line is what it is, I'm assuming.
01:22:02
Speaker
Yeah, yeah, basically. ah That seems sketchy. Okay. Yeah, so... um Cancel card, cancel card.
01:22:15
Speaker
I didn't cancel my cards. My my cards weren't the problem. Um, I think the web, I'm pretty sure the website or the airline was, hu okay because because I had like used my credit card to order lunch earlier the same day and it worked fine.
01:22:34
Speaker
I see. Okay. Yeah. So, so anyway, the next, it was the next day, the next day I, um, I find out that that Like I'm about to head, I've just been like spending the afternoon packing and getting out getting to be preparing to like so like leave the house leave the house to go to JFK airport. um
01:23:02
Speaker
And i check i check the website to look at my tickets and I find out find out I find out that my flight to London has been switched from Friday friday to Sunday.
01:23:17
Speaker
What? nice Okay. And I would have been, you know, with that flight, I would have been flying into London on like Monday morning 6.45 a.m. or something.
01:23:33
Speaker
I'm assuming that's like after the conference. No. This would have been the very first day of the conference. Okay, so did you still see that? I would have made it, but I would really tired and and like unable to absorb any information.
01:23:48
Speaker
Okay. So I wanted, I actually wanted to like go there a few days ahead of time so it just so I could like relax. Now, quickly for context, where where is this conference being held?
01:24:00
Speaker
London. <unk> Oh, right, you said London. That's right, right, right. Sorry, you said Paris in the beginning. I was confused on whether it was London or Paris. Okay, gotcha. So this is where Paris comes in. um
01:24:13
Speaker
So I get to the airport. I, I, I i i run to the airport just to find out like what is going on with my flight and like like um and see what like see if anybody in person at the airline can do anything about it because the airline has no customer service number they have why this red red flag they have an online chat interface Oh god, not those.
01:24:45
Speaker
Oh my god. The last time I tried to use it, it took like hours to hear back from an actual person. Oh, I hate Co so much. Oh god, I keep going for hours about stupid automation and phone trees and chatbots. Oh my god.
01:25:03
Speaker
Customer service is nightmare. Yeah, so so i so I get to JFK. By the way, you take... um you take the E train from where, from where I was, to, um, Jamaica station, Jamaica van, whatever, um, and like, and then transfer to the air train. And that's another, the subway ride is like $3. And then the air train is like another $8 and 50 cents, get to the airport.
01:25:33
Speaker
Um, to get yeah to the airport and the air um
01:25:39
Speaker
And so I get to i get to dayfk Terminal 7, and there is this long line of people standing outside the airport. um Standing outside the airport.
01:25:51
Speaker
like standing outside the entrance to the terminal. um And I asked the person standing in front of me, hey, like what's going on? What's with all these people here? um And there he says there's a bunch of people going to Rome and Paris.
01:26:08
Speaker
um And he also says he happens to be on the same flight to London that got moved. as me that got like don move And it turned out that he had actually gotten an email informing him that the flight had been had been canceled.
01:26:30
Speaker
Entirely? Not even just like switch? It had been canceled and the airline automatically moved everybody onto the next available flight. Okay.
01:26:42
Speaker
Which in this case was Sunday at Okay, gotcha. okay got um and i was like okay yeah i guess we're in the same boat then but as i was standing on the line i was like wait second there's a flight going to paris so so tonight so why don't i why don't i take and it's it's an hour earlier than the london flight would been so why don't i take the flight why don't take the plane to paris And then spend an afternoon in Paris and then take the train across the channel into London.
01:27:15
Speaker
And then I'll be on schedule. the Yeah, because there's a train that goes underneath the English Channel. Yeah, exactly. exactly I've been on that train before.
01:27:28
Speaker
Yeah. so so i So I eventually got to the front of the line. And I told them... Like I told the ah people at the kiosk, hey, like,
01:27:40
Speaker
hey, I'm one of the people who've been moved off to the london off of the London flight tonight. like um Can you put me on the flight to Paris? And they were like, well, the flight to Paris is overbooked, but we can try to get you on. to get you on And then, like, 10 minutes later, they got me on. And the guy was like, I was like,
01:28:03
Speaker
have a hundred you owe us a hundred and twenty dollars and i was like colors and i was like I couldn't pay online. um Can you help me? I am really trying my best to you know pay the 120. So gave my card.
01:28:17
Speaker
He swiped it. got declined. And then I gave him my other card. It was like my debit card or something. and then i gave him my other card it was like my debit card or something um And it also got declined. And there was, I mean, I just, I didn't bring that many credit cards with me on on the trip because I just, for security reasons, I like to leave those at home. Yeah, that makes sense.
01:28:48
Speaker
yeah Yeah. So, and he didn't have Google Pay either. How does he not have like phone pay or something? Like that baffles me.
01:28:59
Speaker
that's a high-tech airport high traffic airport yeah exactly yeah so i waited like 20 minutes to hear back from them and they were like okay you go know what we're gonna waive the fee um you're good you're good yeah yeah yeah a lot more understanding than other airports yeah and for a low-cost airline especially they're like like yeah forget it yeah you know you we're not going to be able to get the money from you.
01:29:25
Speaker
So just go ahead. She's just like, we're not going be able gouge you for money. I guess you might as well go. that We don't have time to run your pockets.
01:29:38
Speaker
Yeah, so by this time, the plane was scheduled to take off 1230 after midnight. um And it was already 1120. So I had to book it so i had to book it through that oh yeah i know what that's like you know where's the gate where's the gate yeah yeah um
01:30:05
Speaker
Yeah, so so I stood in the security line. It was actually pretty short. but There were not that many people. But once I got on, it was like, they make you take off your shoes, they make you take off your laptop, and your Nintendo Switch, and everything else.
01:30:20
Speaker
and and like And like, I mean, I went through security without a hitch. It was just a hitch it pain in the ass to get everything out of their bags. um And then I had time to grab a...
01:30:34
Speaker
a um To grab a yogurt parfait and a like protein bar. Protein bar. Okay.
01:30:45
Speaker
From a convenience store. Like, all of the restaurants inside the terminal were closed because it was, like, midnight. Yeah, that makes sense. And they were, like, on their final boarding call for the flight. So I just got on and got in line, and it was actually really smooth from there on. um And I was on my way to Paris. Okay.
01:31:08
Speaker
okay Yeah, I was not expecting to go to Paris that evening. But I figured I would make the most of it. So so like seven hours later, I touched down in Charles de Gaulle Airport.
01:31:29
Speaker
And long story short, I get out of there with very little trouble. um I bought a day pass through my phone plan.
01:31:46
Speaker
And for, like, a day's worth of data. of data um And, um unfortunately, did not work the entire time I was in Paris. I was, like, jumping from public Wi-Fi network to public Wi-Fi network.
01:32:02
Speaker
Jeez. Okay. Yeah. But... um I had a pretty chill time in Paris. i The first thing I did was make my way to the Eiffel Tower.
01:32:17
Speaker
um Because I had been to Paris once before, but my friend and I didn't get to see the Eiffel Tower close. OK. okay Yeah, so I went there. And there was a short-ish line of people, but I didn't want to go inside because I didn't really have time. and also also, didn't want to go to the trouble of like... I didn't want to like... I was carrying my luggage with me, and I didn't want to...
01:32:50
Speaker
to
01:32:54
Speaker
um you didn't want to carry with you the entire way no no no no i didn't i didn't they were checking bags and i didn't want to like get i didn't want to deal with that deal with stuff on this trip like um um so and also it was raining in paris oh great of course it's raining it's always raining over there Yeah, so I saw the um i saw the tower close. there I saw like the elevators going up and down. There were different colors of elevators. I'm not really sure.
01:33:29
Speaker
um And it was pretty nice to see the tower through the trees, which was cool. Yeah. So I stood there for about 15 minutes then started walking back. um so i was there i stooded there for about fifteen minutes and then like started walking back And there were these ducks and I actually like took pictures of them because they were kind of cute. um And then there's also this there's also this like Japanese cultural center near near the Eiffel Tower. um
01:34:02
Speaker
And I looked at it from the outside and then I tried to go in, but they were like, no you can't you can't bring your bags in here. Like, okay. um But they have like, like they have like ah They have a gift shop gift shop at the ground floor. And there was like Goku and other anime stuff.
01:34:17
Speaker
There was also traditional Japanese cultural stuff. And after that, there was also like traditional like like traditional japanese cultural stuff um
01:34:34
Speaker
and after that i took the train train to Gare du Nord, which is where um which is where the Eurostar train from Paris to London- That's the name of it.
01:34:48
Speaker
Yes, hold on. Sorry, I just have to interrupt you because i while you were telling us where I googled what the train is I took when I was younger. It's the Eurostar. That is the same train I took. Oh, ah you took it to Paris and then another one to Germany?
01:35:02
Speaker
Yeah, apparently that is what happened because I was like five years old when we took that, but i used to I used to live right outside of London. So um yeah, we ended up taking the train from London to Paris and then from Paris all the way up to be back to Germany.
01:35:17
Speaker
So apparently, yeah, it the Eurostar is when I took it. I don't remember name specifically just because i was like five years old, but that is the same train, so
01:35:27
Speaker
That's cool. Yeah. yeah so So like an hour or two later I got on the Eurostar train.
Return Journey and Conclusion
01:35:36
Speaker
um And there's like, I got some food before I got on the train, but there was also a dining car. dining are And um the food was okay. I think it was like... it was like It was decent. It was decent.
01:35:52
Speaker
um And I got to look outside the window and just see like rural France, lots of wind turbines, lots of trees, probably lots of farmland.
01:36:05
Speaker
um Germany has lot of wind turbines. What? What? was gonna say, yeah, tur Germany has a lot of wind turbines. They're everywhere, even in front haven and France, yeah.
01:36:16
Speaker
Yeah. Yeah. so So, and then, and then, And then the term the train like went through a bunch of tunnels, short tunnels. And i was like, are we in the tunnel yet? But it was like it was like over as soon as it started. having the channel um Because I had never been in a tunnel before.
01:36:37
Speaker
But then at one point, it like started, the train started slowing down. There were fences, like it was going into a trench and there were fences at the top of the sides of the trench.
01:36:50
Speaker
um and then it went into this tunnel this tunnel and it was it was pitch dark dark except for like the lights on the sides of the tunnel um that were like that were like faint and green um um and after about a minute i realized we were in the tunnel we're in the tunnel Yeah, that's something I didn't really get to experience because when I was in the tunnel, ah we were in the vehicle compartment because there are some cars that you literally drive your car onto.
01:37:25
Speaker
And that's where we were for that, for when we were there. So I didn't even get to see anything. They didn't have windows. So, yeah. Unfortunately, I didn't get to experience that.
01:37:38
Speaker
Yeah, I think the trains go at, like, top speeds of 100 miles an hour through the tunnel. I wouldn't be surprised. Yeah. It's hard for me to imagine, though, like, even though like trains carrying cars going that fast.
01:37:50
Speaker
Yeah, I know. This is a fast train. This powerful train. Yeah. um um But it was kind of, like, the channel itself was kind of underwhelming, but it was... Because you couldn't see anything. But it was kind of... It was cool just to see, like... see like
01:38:12
Speaker
It was cool just to see, just to like know that I was in the tunnel. How
01:38:19
Speaker
how cool would it be if the tunnel was just completely made of glass? That would be so cool. Like the one that we have made in Gale Beach. Oops, um just bought my table.
01:38:31
Speaker
Yeah, basically. With the glass dome, basically. Yeah. Oh yeah, you could like look above and around you and see like... see like Sharks and fish swimming around.
01:38:44
Speaker
i don't think the water will be that clear. Also, I think the tunnels are too deep for that, but yes. Yeah. Yeah, enough light would get down there, I don't think.
01:38:56
Speaker
But still, it'll be kinda cool. yeah Yeah, but I um i arrived in london in London shortly after that. um We surfaced on the English side. I was like, oh, I'm in England now. and And also, my data actually works now.
01:39:16
Speaker
And the time, like I knew I was in England because like the time changed on my phone on my phone to an hour earlier. Yeah. Yeah. yeah yeah um So fast forward to Thursday. thursday Thursday was the day that I was supposed to fly back fly back to New York. new york um And I was getting out of my, my checking out of my friend's hotel, brought my luggage with me on the train to London Gatwick Airport, um which is like,
01:39:55
Speaker
It's like 45 minutes south of London. It's like halfway between London the southern coast of England. What's it called again? yeah Gatwick. I've heard of it.
01:40:08
Speaker
Okay. yeah Yeah. um I have a quick question. At the airport I usually come into London from is Heathrow. Did you ever happen to pass through a place called Croughton?
01:40:22
Speaker
No. Okay. It's on the- I think it's the east side of London, but that's, uh, that's around the area where I used to live. That's cool.
01:40:34
Speaker
That's cool. I just didn't know if you passed either.
01:40:41
Speaker
Um, so so as I'm- Be quiet, Jake. I got cramps already. Good. Good? Good.
01:40:55
Speaker
I do. Sorry, I was eating something.
01:41:04
Speaker
You can continue. but yeah and think Jake's done complaining. Okay. So I was, um while I was on the train, I checked my ticket again again to see like what time.
01:41:16
Speaker
And then it showed another notification saying, We're sorry, we had to cancel your flight. We put you on a flight to London, New York, the following day 1pm.
01:41:36
Speaker
I was like, damn it. I canceled my flight again. So I was already on the way to Gatwick. Oh, great.
01:41:46
Speaker
Yeah, I went to the airport to like ask what the heck is going on. um And they told they told me that that there you know the flight's canceled. yeah The only other flight you can really get on is this one at 1 p.m., yeah which meant that I would have had to get out to get get up at 8 a.m. to get to the airport in time.
01:42:13
Speaker
um Oh, no. A reasonable time to wake up? what a travesty. Yeah, well, was jet- I was jet-lagged at this point. And also- guess so.
01:42:23
Speaker
I'm not a morning person. um, so- So they told me, like like oh, you're- you're like you're like- you know, we- we automatically automatically wouldve got you accommodations at the- at the hotel nearby. on Um, which is like a five-minute walk away.
01:42:45
Speaker
nice Yeah, and there's free meals. So I start like looking for looking for the hotel. And yeah um I walked through um an elevated corridor out of the airport terminal to like um the building that houses the train station.
01:43:07
Speaker
Um, and then down to the ground level. And I was like looking for, i was looking for the hotel. Um, and I was like walking in circles around the parking lot parking lot to try to find find the passageway that takes you to the hotel.
01:43:25
Speaker
Um, and I couldn't find it. And it was, and then I saw, as I went around to the back of the parking lot, um, um And I saw this elevated um this elevated passageway sticking out of the parking lot building and connecting to the hotel on the other side. And I was like, okay, so that's where I have to go. How do I get up there?
01:43:52
Speaker
um And then i walked I walked, like I was trying to find an entrance, but I couldn't. And then I like walked through the parking lot to get to the other side of the building. and the building And then I like took an elevator up later to, i think it was the first or second floor.
01:44:09
Speaker
um They count floors differently in England.
01:44:13
Speaker
And I eventually found the found the passageway and I got to the hotel. um
01:44:21
Speaker
And I had a really kind of really good dinner at the buffet. And then I went to sleep sleep um and got up the next day with an alarm.
01:44:35
Speaker
And
01:44:38
Speaker
and had a good breakfast. um Again, free of charge. Hell yeah. food's always good. Yeah. Yeah. um Yeah, and then I tucked in at the airport and the rest of my trip was pretty smooth.
01:44:56
Speaker
Okay, you made it back home without being mugged by anyone in an alleyway? Yeah, pretty much. that's so all hear about me That's all I hear about in London is people jumping out at you with knives like, give me your wallet!
01:45:09
Speaker
Well, I didn't get mugged at London. um I stayed in... You missed out on a real London experience. if Well, I stayed in Shoreditch, which is like... It's like on the east side of London.
01:45:24
Speaker
um It seems like it might be kind of sketchy, but it was actually not. It was like there's all like all these pubs and people walking around and partying in the evenings.
01:45:35
Speaker
Okay, that's kind of neat. Yeah. There's a lot of like cool murals in your feet too. Well, um, I, I was gonna say, nevermind, was gonna say something, I'm not gonna say that.
01:45:50
Speaker
So you made it back home to New York without a problem? Yeah. Yeah.
01:45:57
Speaker
Okay, cool. ah So, I do have one question though. You said you had an AI conference. Is this a conference about AI? Or were you in a conference with AI?
01:46:11
Speaker
You're just sitting around the table with just a bunch of androids sitting around the table. It's like, we must kill all humans. Yes, I agree. We must kill all humans.
01:46:24
Speaker
So like the first day of the conference there were bunch of... something happened? What happened? I think Jake woke up. Oh, I fell off my chair.
01:46:35
Speaker
Morning, Jake. Dog, get off me. I'm on the ground and my dog is attacking me. Okay. Help!
01:46:48
Speaker
Jake's a dog person. if anybody knows If anybody knows how to call it implements, I think Jake is dying, Colonel. If any of you in the audience wish to save Jake's life, call the correct number, yeah yeah but not the wrong one. So that way somebody may save Jake's life.
01:47:09
Speaker
I'll clip your toenails. What? He has sharp nails. Oh, I thought you said I'm clipping my toenails. No, I'm clipping his nails.
01:47:20
Speaker
Oh. He won't let me get up! Dog? Yes! usually don't get down to level with him. I feel like everybody I know is a cat person. Stop it, buddy.
01:47:32
Speaker
I am a cat person. Tupelo is literally sitting right here. i Hey, buddy. Don't make me throw you in your can of fluffy.
01:47:41
Speaker
He's so adorable. I know a lot dog people. I probably know more dog people than cat people. but He's not letting get up. He is holding onto one of my things that connected to my microphone. and So if get up, he's going rip it out. So he's like holding me hostage. Oh, gosh.
01:47:58
Speaker
It's funny how he works, Eli. but Leave me alone! Too bad nobody's going to be able to save you. got
01:48:12
Speaker
Congratulations. I think. Jake has been viciously mauled by a cow and a dog. Often mauled by more. I'm sure you have. Don't.
01:48:23
Speaker
Stop trying to take my socks. What? He's trying and I have like a pair of extra socks beside me. He's trying to grab them. Okay. Alright.
01:48:34
Speaker
ah Well, anyway, this has been. What did you say the title was? PTT Break Room. What? No, not you. Oh, her. Whoops. i unexpectedly went to France.
01:48:46
Speaker
Paris. This has been that. It this has been 40 minutes. We'll see you guys next time. This is running over four times as long as it should. I got a great new story for another episode.
01:48:58
Speaker
oh my gosh. Alright, goodbye.