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Arc 2 - Episode 17 - Domestic Terrorism, Hooray!
38 Plays1 month ago
The crew does some lovely domestic terrorism. I'm sure it'll be fine, right?
Patreon - https://www.patreon.com/user?u=60748541
Discord - https://discord.gg/A7NCWyPkSd
Dakota as the PM, DM, GM
Evelyn as Hikaru Hatsumi the Pikachu
Eli as Bruce Flameback the Cyndaquil
Shawn as Sammy Pepperoni the Munchlax
Jake as Walter Fisthands the Riolu
Recommended
Transcript
Episode Introduction and Setup
00:00:00
Speaker
Hey guys, before we get into this episode, just want to give you guys a heads up. Um, when I set the audio to Sean for editing this episode, I accidentally sent him the backup audio instead of a regular audio. So it may be of a slightly lower quality. Um, I'm sorry for that, but I did not know that until it was done editing. So this is what we got now. So cool. I, yeah, uh, that's what we got. So I will see you guys in the episode.
00:00:28
Speaker
literally like yesterday or the night or the night before i was like i don't even remember last episode i was like oh yeah it's the detective arc right yes the detective arc all right cool so let us get started when jake will stop making noise so i can actually i'm sorry i'm trying to find a d4 you can do it what is the intro what is up with the other way i think there was a time that i liked what i think there was a time that i accidentally rolled a d12 instead of a d20 i got a nine what okay cool let's get started all right here we go tell me what actually hold on one second let me get cross so i get something to be comfortable okay no you're allowed to have
00:01:26
Speaker
Hello everyone and welcome to a Path through
Hosts and Humor: Meet the Team
00:01:28
Speaker
Time. My name is Dakota and sitting to my left is somebody who has a apple trackpad. Really struggled with that one. It's me, Evelyn. Um, yeah, only the trackpad is, um, the trackpad is made of apples. It's really, it's really weird. I don't know how, like, I don't know how they made a trackpad out of apples, but like,
00:01:53
Speaker
And to my left is is somebody. Somebody. Yeah, you got me. I am somebody. I'm Eli. I'm Bruce. And yeah, just just somebody, you know? don't don't Don't worry about who I am. I'm just somebody. And sitting across from me is someone who's trying to get us sponsored by Telenuke Ice Cream.
00:02:25
Speaker
you say Nutella or tell of tell a nuke because another one of the sound well you tell are new to tell a nuke a nuke uh all one word i think i think i've told em oh wait is it yeah oh yeah tell them that's it tell them yeah tell them sounds canadian tell a muk t-i-l-l-a muk yes it's a dairy company they have cheese ice cream yeah it's just they're dairy Oh, it's based in Oregon. That's actually pretty close to me. Okay. Yeah. Hi, I'm Sean. I like ice cream. My body
Patreon Support and Perks
00:03:02
Speaker
doesn't like ice cream, but I like ice cream. And this is how we learned that Sean is not in his own body. That's not at all. You should have taken off. We're coming all the way in from Japan. It's somebody who doesn't have a driver's license. That's false, man. I'm young. I'm not that young.
00:03:27
Speaker
I've been forgetting to do this the last couple episodes, so I'm going to do it now before I forget, but we need to shout out the Patreon members that have subscribed to Patreon. one So we have in our bronze tier, we have Crystal Briggs, Isaiah White, and Eli himself. In the gold tier, we have Mint and Evelyn. i was friend Is this Sierra or Kiira? You corrected me on this once.
00:03:52
Speaker
Kyra, but it's fine. Kyra. Okay, gotcha. Yeah, because it looks like it's supposed to be, say, Sierra, like, you know, Sierra. Okay. She gives you the correct pronunciation and you still get it wrong. Okay, anyway. Okay, cool. We have any silver subscribers?
00:04:08
Speaker
No, and that is for good reason and I will explain why really quickly because I've explained it before our silver tier is under works and does not currently have any benefits. So ah silver tier is currently the same as bronze to do not subscribe to the silver tier. If you do, I will try and warn you.
00:04:24
Speaker
um That is actually something I'm hopefully gonna be working on. that Do not subscribe to the silver tier unless you really want to. If you feel like giving us the extra money without benefit.
Recap of the Bank Heist Investigation
00:04:34
Speaker
Unless you feel like giving us extra money without an actual benefit, thank you. We appreciate that, but we advise you, you don't have to. But we would appreciate it. People can pay more than the minimum amount for each tier per month, so like you you can be subscribed to the bronze and be paying like $7 a month. Yeah.
00:04:52
Speaker
I actually didn't know you could do that. Let us roll for recap. And I really hope I don't do it this time, because it's going to be much more interesting than someone else's I got. All right, you guys, you guys say three, two, one, three. All right, I got a two. So, Sean, you're doing it right now. For what? No. He said he's going to remember it. The one time I'm glad I'm under it.
00:05:19
Speaker
Well, I mean, most of the time, I'm i'm glad now. Hold on, hold on. Sean, Sean, go look at my notes. We got them pinned. Oh, heck, we have notes. Yeah, yeah, yeah. We do have notes. So I don't know if it made it to the episode last time, but Jake actually kept like a long list of notes. And at the end of the episode, if you listen to the real recording, we were making a lot of fun about it. It's really funny. Go check that out. I have the notes up. There is part of it called Blue's Clues. Jake, you're not doing the recap. Shut up. Well, I just want to point out it's Blue's Clues, and you happen to be a blue dog. Are you playing a blue dog? Why do you think I called it that? Oh, is that why you called it that? I just now made that connection.
00:05:58
Speaker
oh my god i think you don't i think you don't give him enough credit man no i'm young but i do watch blue's clues okay and then said i'm well but not stupid no i'm stupid ah say i don't know if i can agree to that You know how, okay, you know the, uh, you know when people have like a stack of papers and they're like, they, they shuffle them and they're like, they bang them against the table to get them all aligned? Yeah, like that's me with the computer right now. Uh, here we go. I'm sorry. I think it's two pages long. This is the way you describe it. Here's the last episode. You shuffle the papers again and you just like sloth them on the table. Objection! Vertically, you shit, you shit, you hit them vertically.
00:06:47
Speaker
I know, but the way you said there, I imagine you said the stack of it as well. Wham wham wham on the table. Anyway, go ahead. Alright, so here's the last episode. This is what happened in our nice detailed notes from that guy. Thank you. That guy. That guy. Bank Heist investigation. We are investigating the bank heist that happened two weeks ago in game time because I actually mapped out the days that went that that we had. it's been about the Since the start of the show, it's been about two weeks.
00:07:19
Speaker
a Two marks is in two weeks. There's been some confusion, so I literally re-listened to the entire show to figure it out. About two weeks. yes Yeah, that actually helped a lot by the way.
00:07:33
Speaker
Bank Heist investigation. We're investigating the bank heist that took place in Volkenburg at the name of the bank that I do not remember. Volkenburg Bank might just be, yeah. Yeah, it's just Volkenburg Bank. There was silver, are the shiny S beyond that everyone is suspicious of because she's um she's not not trustworthy. I don't know. She seems weird. ah Officer Bill is the Arcanine who is investigating the case. There's two guards guarding the back of the bank. They didn't write down what they were.
00:08:01
Speaker
new robot yeah yeah they were profile so all right i'll admit they grow In the open area inside of the bank there's three teller desks there's an each of them are a starter Pokemon of Bulbasaur other guy and Squirtle The building is 60 feet tall just in case anyone needs to know that it's it's one room that's 60 feet tall. Like, it's very... Hold on! It's very big upwards. Sean, go down to from the guards' account. It has the Pokémon name right there. Oh, it does. Cypher, the Grovile, remarks.
00:08:40
Speaker
From the guards' account, Cypher the Grovyle remarks, they were doing the job but not paying attention. Then they were both knocked out after smelling something sweet, and after they woke up, their keys were gone suspiciously. And the artifact was missing after an hour or so. Hetastill item was missing and some money. The crime happened around 2 PM.
Theories and Character Quirks
00:09:00
Speaker
The client was some rich dude named Cypress, the family of Greninjas just outside of town. Oil money rich. o win Oh Oh wink.
00:09:09
Speaker
There's not a wink written down, but I think there could be a wink there. Are you going through my entire notes actually? as well We actually have notes for the first time in the entire show. Oh boy. Well, no, that's not the first time. Evelyn took notes once when she did a recap. Well, we got hard copies now. We got here's some theories. Mixed in sleep powder and sweet scent. A possibility of there's a possibility it's an inside job. You know, all of five people that i I have to add one more. Whole town is in on the robbery. The whole town's in on it, man. Everyone we talked to, they're real weird about it. So here's our suspects. The sus people that we have to investigate. That we have talked to maybe one person so far. This is going to be a long arc, folks. We got a lot of suspects. Three, actually. We talked to two people. Three. We talked to three whole people.
00:10:09
Speaker
My god. Try the leafy eye. It's off the shirt. You're energetic. That lives flowers. Son of a- I was having so many problems with autocorrect, I didn't even care. I was getting so- I'm- mmm. Bury the apple in. He's always outside the bank. That's his alibi. He was the Sirfetch'd. Female who likes battles.
00:10:33
Speaker
that so that you know She just likes battles. Fakers the Octillery knows how to make explosives. Now, if that ain't the weirdest, most suspicious thing, Effie and Bob the Sableye, super twitchy and crazy enough to cause mayhem. Zazu the Toucan, seen at the crime of the day before doing a newscast on the vault doors. Jake, I thought you fixed that. It's it's just a regular toucan.
00:11:00
Speaker
Son of a... I'm... I gave up on the name! It autocorrected five times. I just gave up on what it could give me. Okay. Alright, the next one says, Suspect the motherfucking Charmander. That is actually what it says, by the way. That's what he wrote. Midnight Lycanroc, his name is Wesson Smith.
00:11:23
Speaker
not Western Smith. i hang in the dumps I'm sorry, I made all the I fixed all the mistakes on my thing, but you got the hard copy of the one we had all the mistakes on it. yeah So Western Smith was found in the dumpster. He's an escaped conflict to which we caught. We did really well on that one.
00:11:41
Speaker
Also, you know remember you remember silver the one I said was sus. Yeah, she's also on the sus list ah silver the Espeon owner doing paperwork Sorry, she was doing paperwork. That was not needed. I forgot about that Also got a point out. It's an Espeon So our major suspects so far are leafy on hiding somewhere and hiding something in the house if Espeon looking worried and chuck Charmander isn't is a jerk. That's it. That's that's why there's us. Charmander is a jerk. I also want to point out the Vickers the Octillery. It says he only knows how to make one single explosive. He says he knows how to make explosive explosions. Do you want to do this? Do you want to make these notes like this? Oh no, you're the D and you have all the notes, huh? So here's here's what we know about silver. Sorry, this is what we know. Silver is nervous.
00:12:42
Speaker
There's no side entrances. There's only one way yeah by the name blues clues. I'm sorry. It is the blues clues. OK, this is our blues clues. Silver's nervous. There's no side entrances. Three. The window into the bathroom. I don't know what he means by that, but there's a window that goes into the bathroom. There's that's the one window in this entire bank. Nothing in there. There's nothing wrong
Strategic Decisions and Role-Playing
00:13:02
Speaker
in the roof. Nothing in the roof is wrong. There was no hole. There's nothing. There's nothing wrong in there.
00:13:09
Speaker
But there's a thin white yarn string somewhere. I don't know where. We got two guys. We got three guys with alibis. Barry, he was selling outside of the bank. Seems innocent. Bank tellers, they were knocked out. Seems innocent. But attitude. Silver, she was on a business trip. I forgot the notes. Here are the suspects of residents. Know all of them.
00:13:36
Speaker
I don't know what that means either. I know they all live. We all we know what they all live. Oh, we know where they live. Yes. West part of town with the mention of where cypherist. And shy with water in our garden. That's false alibi. You wrote cypherist.
00:13:55
Speaker
paul sal i leafyon was watering here yeah no no and that's my bed i was getting cipher and cipher as confused it's okay so why one are are the rest down here yeah ah so cypherus is spelled with ai y in place of the cyrus but those Hey, yeah I fixed all this, but it's on my notes. Not these new ones. but Anyway, that's what the notes say. And that's what happened last episode. ah You know, Sammy wants to get paid for our time, but the cops keep saying, oh, you're not on our payroll. But otherwise, it's on the payroll. That's what happened. Yeah, that was too. We should really investigate the car. Oh, intrigue. Intrigue what? Did I miss something? Imagine if the cops were behind it.
00:14:40
Speaker
Oh, that'd be fun. Don't act like you're not. He says as if he's like, maybe I should make them the make them the the suspect. per the suspect ah there's no Oh, Anyway, that's the that's our recap. Thanks, ah Jake, over there all the way in Wisconsin. He's not in Wisconsin. Don't look for him there. right thank for For giving us thanks for listening. And for listening to the recap.
00:15:07
Speaker
That's all, folks! This might be our longest recap, though. Alright, cool. We need to get into this, so Jake, not Jake. It's not your job, Jake. Sean, pull us up on your- I'M YOUR INFERNO OVERDRIVE IN! I think that's the second time you've done that one. Let's murder some joltik!
00:15:27
Speaker
Oh, Inferno Overdrive? Yeah, doing it I'm pretty sure we've done at least one of the Z moves already, and I thought it was Inferno Overdrive. Yeah, we did the one that I just doorlocks. Who are you, Apple? And who said you can generate a move?
00:15:47
Speaker
ah I'm not deciding, I'm just suggesting. Okay, so we're fire over, what what did you say it was? Infernal Overdrive. Infernal Drive, let us Infernal Overdrive on. You guys are just now leaving the Chai residence and you guys were going to head towards the. The Cypress. The Cypress. Yeah, that's. The Cypress is. Yes, so you got to go to the, you guys are heading to the west side of town.
00:16:19
Speaker
Uh, can you tell us a long day? You guys are going in into the cypresses to interrogate the owners who, by the way, the cypresses were the owners of the bank. wal that got robbed I don't remember if that was said it or not, but that is who they are. So you guys are heading towards the west side of the city. They have oil rich money. As you guys are heading there, you guys pass through downtown and you guys notice it is starting to get dark. Would you guys like to stop for a hotel?
00:16:50
Speaker
How far is it? You see a bunch of hotels right around you. Take your pick. What time would it be when we get to the Cypress's house? I'm going to say it's on the west side of town. So funny thing is I've always imagined the uptown being on sorry, the skyscraper district being on the west side of town. So I kind of got to flip the map. So I think it would take you about like an hour to walk there across town. Hmm.
00:17:19
Speaker
So you guys could do it. It would be fully dark by the time you get there. And if you guys
Arrival at the Cypress Estate
00:17:23
Speaker
don't have any ah anything you want to do, we can always just like fast forward to the next day. I don't know about you guys, but I don't want to deal with ninjas in the dark. grin oh yeah Yeah, they are. They're good ninjas. Yeah, why do we stay? Why can't we? Why would my sense is a good but not that good mansion today? OK, so what are you guys doing? I thought we sleep.
00:17:48
Speaker
Yeah, I think Bruce is actually going to agree with Walter. Oh! We should say, yeah, we probably should turn in for the night and deal with the the cypresses in the morning.
00:18:03
Speaker
Alright, dumb suggestion. Okay, what's your suggestion? We just have like a place like I kind of didn't like how an arc one where we had to really decide I'm like what kind of version of hotel we can we can we just go to a place not like yeah i would have loing budget hotels three okay yeah threear hotel and we go Yeah, I was gonna have you guys just fast-forward through the night unless you guys want to do anything. Okay. No, no, that's fine Alright, so you guys go to the nearest one-star hotel and it's dirt cheap they pay you negative they ask for negative money it's so cheap oh so we get paid for staying at this hotel wow wow what a profit sure but it's a garbage bin in an alley what but that's okay i mean i'm and we haven't had breakfast yet so like is there anything tasty in there well i mean can we say i'll eat pretty much anything so like you know i'm gonna go check out the dumpster what the heck not
00:18:58
Speaker
Okay, you guys are going to a regular hotel. I'm gonna roll an investigation on the dumpster! Fuck, okay. Cool roll investigation. Why did I do this? Yo, can we roll? Love to see whoever will stay here behind if they left anything. Money won. Uh, that's what an investigation's for. It is smacked. I don't have a smacked. So I rolled a 13. 13. You notice a shiny penny on the ground and a half-eaten apple. A heck of a half-eaten apple. I'm totally gonna take that.
00:19:28
Speaker
yeah know let me roll investigation for the room all right roll investigation um that's smart isn't it that is smart yes okay 12 all right you're not in a room what you're outside staring into an alley i said when can i investigate the room you're not in a room there is no room Oh, won't you send an alley? I said... I thought that was a joke. I was going to make it a joke, but Sean decided he wanted to go eat a... go dumpster diving. Sean, you can eat this. Sammy, you can eat there. I'm going to an actual hotel. Okay, so... Alright, everyone goes to the hotel that's directly next to the alley. You guys... uh, sleep well. You guys also practically have poke from each of you guys, and it is now till next morning. Yeah, they did! Sure! Yes!
00:20:25
Speaker
What? It's a hotel. Why wouldn't they charge you? You said they didn't charge us. No, i I was joking about you guys sleeping in a dumpster in the alleyway. Yes, you guys are. Yeah. 20 bucks is dirt cheap for a hotel anyways for a night, so. A poker burger must cost more. Ding, ding, ding, ding. All right. Does Sammy add the money that he found on the floor? Yep, that is money. The penny?
00:20:54
Speaker
Yep, single penny. Nice and shiny. How much does a penny cost? like in poke What does it translate to? $30,000 in poke. No. Don't put it in one of your items. Put it as your lucky penny. Tiny penny in the item list. I don't have my rock anymore, so now I got a lucky penny. Oh yeah, Jennifer. i've got a bunch Jennifer the second.
00:21:19
Speaker
So you guys you guys are walking towards the west side of town and you guys come across as you guys crest to the hill. You guys see at the bottom of the valley, basically at the bottom of the hill is a large estate with a black u raw iron gate all the way around it. And the gate seems to be closed as you guys walk up to it. And there is what seems to be a grandpa's grandpa. Grandpa.
00:21:48
Speaker
Is that Alfred? What is Alfred doing out here? I didn't think Drampa was a popular butler Pokemon, but... I mean, he's a good bodyguard. That is true. I wonder if these cypresses have children. Probably do. Family heritage. How about here? How about, like, to find out? What if I just go jump on his back and, you know... No. I don't think it's all friends. Then we'll know.
00:22:16
Speaker
He's on the other side of the gate. Okay. Yeah. and I have super springy jump boots. He do not have super springy jump boots. Let's just walk up and ask him some questions. Okay. So you guys walk up to the gate, which is closed on and locked. And the drop hall sees you guys and he's like, my hello there. My name is George. How may I be of service to you? Hey George, check out my cool Heelys.
00:22:45
Speaker
i just got them i've been showing everybody May I help you guys? We've we've been called upon to investigate um the bank robbery. We heard that Um, we heard that the cypress's vault was robbed and we just wanted to ask him some questions about it. and what he said Yeah, when you say, when you, uh, mention the bank robbers, he's, he's like, oh, the cypress's have informed me. And by the way, my accent has gone. The cypress's have informed me that anything to do with the bank robbery is strictly
00:23:24
Speaker
not allowed to be talked about. They do not wish to discuss the matter further, and I will ask you guys to leave, please. That's cool that they don't like it to happen, but they don't need to decide when if a crime can just go away. and The Cyprus's, as far as I can tell, have not filed a formal complaint about the matter, and such it has not been put to a formal case.
00:23:50
Speaker
it is not something that the police can handle and it is not if you guys are truly working for the police then you guys are overstepping your boundaries is this correct? I hold up my blast seat and listen George do you let us in or I'm gonna throw this blast seat at you but fit sam we there we know wait me clarify some things here the dragon oh yeah your blast seat and he's like oh that's cute
00:24:17
Speaker
Yeah, so we're not technically working for the police. We're just that the police have bounty hunters that no, not bounty hunters. We were hired as private investigators by some concerned police officers who are doing this outside of work hours.
00:24:40
Speaker
in a private capacity. He said he was going to pay us, so we worked for the police. I see, I see. You guys are PIs. We work for certain police officers, not the police. Yes. Okay. Well, I have been told that that anybody is seeking information about the bank robbery, I was told to turn away. You guys,
00:25:00
Speaker
I mean... Well, would you
Investigating Alternative Leads
00:25:02
Speaker
turn away george would you turn away a nice tasty pizza? Cause I could come in and make you guys the most delicious pizza you've ever had. Oh, definitely. I would definitely turn away from that. Would you turn away from 90 Boca McRiddles? He's like, excuse me. Open bag, you just dump a pile on, somehow it's fitting in your bag, it doesn't make sense. He looks at the pile of Boca Burgas on the counter and he's like,
00:25:30
Speaker
Okay, you guys are ah ah eccentric, to say the least. Oh, hold on, I wish that Bruce- Very passionate about food. Bruce, tell him who your family is! Uhhh, well... Come on, yeah tell him who my family is! All rich people know each other! I was hoping I wouldn't have to pull this out, but I am a Bruce Flameback. my My parents did some business with, uh,
00:26:01
Speaker
Your employers, uh, many years ago? Say you have a business proposal. I were employers being who? Uh, your employers being the cypresses, of course. I could tell you are not familiar with your family's politics, that for the flamebacks have always been enemies in business, strictly speaking. Really? That's surprising.
00:26:29
Speaker
I was not aware that we had many enemies all in the business world. I prefer to call it business competition. Well, yes. Honestly, though, Mrs. F seems like the kind of person who would have enemies. How about an autograph of a famous singer? Well, guitar. Famous um musical person. Do you know the band The Gravel Rocks? His mom's The Gravel Rocks lead singer, I think. I'm like, I don't know if I do lead guitarist.
00:26:59
Speaker
What he said. I have no interest in taking bribes from you. I was told to turn away, and these such people were talking about the banks. Listen. Man, this guy's just like Alfred. That's fine and dandy. We don't give a shit what are you of what of what you were told. We we need to come and and investigate. Sammy. Sammy, no. What? We've seen Alfred fight. We don't know if he's on the same level. We'll get our asses and do it. I mean, that's fair. I know, but we got a job to do here.
00:27:28
Speaker
Maybe we can just let's just come back and just go back and like strategize. All right, maybe what we should do is we'll go talk to the cop guy that we worked for and tell him, hey, the that the butler, there's an asshole. So we need you to come in and, you know, do something. I can't really do anything. It's this is not a place to matter anymore. Yeah.
00:27:51
Speaker
We got to know when to hold them and know when to fold. And it's time to fold them and get out of here. Yeah. Why have you been waiting for much longer? Have we walked out of earshot at this point? No, we're still next to the gate. He's just watching us. He's watching us. He's like, oh, this is great calm. Let's walk this way a fair bit, eh? Yeah, you guys take us a few steps away from the gate, and you guys are now out of earshot of George.
00:28:22
Speaker
So I think we need to find another way in, not through the main gate. Yeah. I think we need to be i think we need to be like three, ah four Pokémon in a trench coat.
Encounter with Caffeine Bob
00:28:37
Speaker
Well, i here's the thing. and I think we should wait until this is later in case things go wrong. So we know all the facts about everything?
00:28:46
Speaker
And if we have to get pulled off, there won't be any more heat or... Hey, did you hear these crazy Pokémon just broke into the mansion? Yeah, that's probably a thing. So we still got people by surprise. Right, we gotta be tracking here. Breaking and entering is not something we need to add to our felony list, dude. What'd you say, Sammy? So we don't need to add breaking and entering to our felonies list. I don't think breaking and entering is a felony, but yeah, probably a good idea. We broke into that bar. How would that not be a felony? We did not break into the bar.
00:29:15
Speaker
I mean, it depends on how hard you break and enter. Fair enough. As long as we're not destroying things. It's a mis- It's a misdemeanor, I bet. If you dropped a nuke on the mansion and then entered the property, I think that'd be considerable. I think that'd be worth it. I think we're called for crime. Well, what if- You're breaking the Geneva Convention.
00:29:36
Speaker
I mean, if being too darn happy all the time is a felony, then we've done a lot worse. Oh god, you guys are going straight to jail. Okay, so what are you guys doing? Do not pass go, do not collect 200, okay. Should we do the toucannon? No, we have to do the toucan. Oh yeah, Zazu, okay. Let me lick up my notes on the sauce. Maybe he's got something on footage of when he was doing the...
00:30:01
Speaker
something helpful. That's actually not a bad idea. Or his notes. Walther's been on fire with the ideas lately. Oh, wait a minute. Hold on. I didn't even think about this. How does the newscast work? There's no TV. Oh, newspaper. I was thinking radio. Yeah, newspaper. Yeah. They just copied down what he says. No, no, no. Hang on. The Game Boy camera. What? No one has it. Oh, no. Yeah, no one really has it. We're the only ones who have that stuff. No. We only have... We have GBA's. Maybe they have the Game Boy Color.
00:30:29
Speaker
oh Did the Game Boy Color have a camera though? Yes. Yes, it had a camera accessory. It's like this big bulbous thing you put on top. Oh, well, there you go. Absolutely. Pretty sure it was for the original Game Boy. There's no audio though, they just have to. It was like a Game Boy, yeah. They also had like a printer, because you take pictures with it. Oh my god, yes. I forgot about that. Yeah, because there were, yeah, those were two things. Yeah, you could take pictures of the Game Boy. Some people are showing their age. Hi, I'm old.
00:31:01
Speaker
I just like old tech. I'm young and I get ripped on it all the time. Okay, so you guys are visiting Zazu? I guess. Yeah. Alright, so Zazu lives according to your address in an apartment complex in an apartment complex in the district. Okay, so close to where we are right now. So an hour and a half from where you are right now.
00:31:27
Speaker
How big is this guy? Oh my gosh, he's rich people. got use this nice spaces night time oh no and always platform no You I said you guys walked in hours to get out to the edge of the city. I thought you said that the um big is the skyscraper complex i thought you said that they were like the west side of the city was the skyscraper complex you said that's where they lived no no i said i'd imagined it on the west side but i got i have to flip the map because that's not the case
00:32:02
Speaker
I've just so I keep saying West and I'm imagining the ah the Cyprus is being on the east side, so I just got to flip the map in my head to actually make it make sense. So, yeah, that's confusion on my part. But yes, you guys are. So are we on the west side of the east side? The uptown, a.k.a. Skyscraper District is on the east side of the city. Oh, OK. So I think then we should find out who is like on the way if there's anyone closer to here.
00:32:30
Speaker
we could talk to hor on our way over to the other side. you honest i mean It doesn't matter to me because I will not be able to visualize this, so I don't care where. The person that is closest. OK, so you guys are going to have fun if the person is closest to you is caffeine, Bob the Sableye. OK. He lives on the eastern side of the city. Well, but he lives where? On the eastern side, he lives next to a coffee shop in on the edge of the suburban area.
00:33:00
Speaker
You guys want to get coffee? Maybe we can bribe them to get information. The eastern side, I thought we were on the, I thought the eastern side was the like downtown area. Sorry, that's certain. No, no, you're right. See, I'm creating myself news. Yes. He lives on the western side, uh, next to the residential area. Yes. So that is the closest to you. I don't think someone crazy and causes mayhem and has caffeine in his name.
00:33:25
Speaker
is complex enough to mix sleeping powder and sweet scent together yeah i was gonna say i did not think they were particularly high up on the suspect list wait you guys asked who the closest one was to you so yeah and me here thinking that he made a joker basically that makes mixes chemicals to do stuff thinking that coda made a joker that'd be funny Yeah, I just imagine a caffeine bulb just like has a cup of coffee he threw out. It has so much caffeine in it and knocked everyone out immediately. That's his smile. It's just coffee but smeared into a smile. Oh my gosh. Dakota rewriting the script. Wait, this is good.
00:34:09
Speaker
Oh, wait. Maybe maybe he knows how to turn caffeine into like something that puts Pokemon to sleep. That makes no sense. Oh, and he's got caffeine. Sorry. So I'm getting to I need to stop we're giving him ideas. We need to stop talking. Yeah. He's just thinking, all right, this is going to be in the final battle. This is going to be their equipment. Here we go. OK, so you guys are talking no matter what.
00:34:35
Speaker
um
00:34:39
Speaker
oh yeah i got hold on i got checked back i got my oresense back yes you do have your sense back uh so are you guys we have arrested and caffeine bob are you guys skipping him uh i guess we why would we i say we go talk we words hold wheat you see i have to investigate everyone on the suspect is he on the way there to yes he's the closest one all right yeah we can just do that point them out Just do the little pit stop. We can leave immediately. if he It's weird. Man, y'all are riding Kathy and Bob off like he ain't shit. Maybe he is something. Who knows? He's gonna be that he's gonna be scarecrow. Oh, no. So that'd be cool. You guys go a couple blocks down. It's only a couple blocks down and you guys um see a saucebook coughing um coffee company on the corner of the street and next to it is the address you guys are going to.
00:35:32
Speaker
I was thinking he'd just be at the saucebox. Yeah, I was going to say, let's check the saucebook coffee first. And if he's not there, we can grab a coffee to give him. Not to be hokiest or anything, but I just realized, don't sample. I just love shiny things. I mean, that's fair. They do. Yeah. Don't they eat gyms? Yeah. Yeah. So maybe they just saw a sh shiny object and stole it. Oh, maybe they had an accomplice.
00:36:00
Speaker
Do you think they would eat like gimme ghoul coins? They're pretty shiny. I don't know. I think they're more into gems than metals. They're not. There could be gems in the vault. I think they eat gem, but they'll hoard anything else shiny. and on You know, gabbites are pretty... Gabbites like shiny things too. They like to hoard their shiny things too. Yeah, but they actually got power to back that up. He's saying saplight doesn't have any power. Compared to a gabbite? No.
00:36:29
Speaker
Yeah, you haven't seen any Sableye. I've seen some ah pretty crazy... You don't know what I've seen! Flashback to Bruce staring into the rift and he always sees his Sableyes. There's just an entire universe of Sableyes. One of the... One of the... Dakota, on your own, ironically...
00:36:55
Speaker
added so many subjects that make sense of wide scale, um, pretty artifacts, uh, same like, Oh yeah. Yeah. See, here's the real thing. We just got to start. Now you think we should go check out the same light there. Uh, real low boy. What's that?
00:37:10
Speaker
Walter, that's it, Walter. i got I got it! This is not like ARK-1. I have a soul now. Walter, I have a soul now. I got a player character, you gotta respect me more, Sammy. Sorry, I want breakfast yet, so umm it's really hard for me to remember shit. but Where even are we right now? Huh, let's just get some, let's go to the coffee shop.
00:37:34
Speaker
yeah okay so as you guys are older boy as you guys are trying to coffee shop uh i need you guys to roll i rolled a 10 with a with a 10 uh that is literally what i needed you guys see caffeine bob shaking sitting at a table like he is like visibly shaking kind of like that put picture i just posted I would oresense him, but I feel like I would just get overloaded by the senses right now. Okay, do we go over to him? Have you ever- Have you ever oresensed a crackhead? That's what it looks like. It's basically what he's acting like. I've never oresensed anything. Yeah. I've hungersensed. Like, I can tell when other people are hungry because I can hear their tummies growling, but other than that, no. The other thing you guys notice is he has at least 10 empty coffee cups next to him. Oh, jeez. Oh boy. I don't think he needs any more coffee.
00:38:30
Speaker
Uh, can I get one double shot expresso please? yep coming right Extra caffeine. as like deridousshed behind the counter It's just his head. No way, he's fitting in there. How big is the building? Uh, it's quite small actually.
00:38:48
Speaker
Is it just his head? ah Half his body's outside, but the rest of his body's doing well. How is the Gyarados getting the drink? You see him turn around? And it's like a cat turning around in a clear tote. Like a really small tote. He just like squishes around. and Maybe I don't want this coffee because he't he's gotta to be doing this with his mouth. That's what I'm saying. He turns back around and he spits out your coffee cup onto the counter.
00:39:18
Speaker
I might have to report you to that hell organ... Wait, I got... Jesus' whiskers to hold the coffee cup. What kind of whiskers do you think he got? He's got sharp whiskers, but he don't got control of them. I'm going to say, if this was a bartender, he learned how to control those whiskers. It's not bartender. He's just giving out coffee. Same difference. All right, we got water.
00:39:48
Speaker
I got Wanda here. I got a cup of coffee for Walter. Walter? Walter? Eh, close enough. They never get your name right. Yeah, Walter has a double sauce espresso. and it can Walk towards and say bye. Trust me guys, I got this.
00:40:05
Speaker
The sable I see you, he is shaking violently. And he looks at his like, oh hi there, you got a coffee for me? Sure, I guess I could give you this double shot extra caffeine coffee. He snatches it out of your hand for you. It's already gone, I'm sorry. I don't even get a roll? Nope, it's gone. good Alright, since so since we're friends now, help do you know anything about this bank heist that happened a while ago? Bank heist? Does it have coffee in it?
00:40:34
Speaker
It could! Oh, no. Oh, do you know anything about it? I have to think so fast trying to control this character. I don't know anything about this damn thing. What are you trying to talk to me about? I need more coffee? And he like runs back up to the counter and he's like, coffee, coffee, more coffee! And, uh, Juridus turns around and he's like, alright, coffee. What are you off?
00:41:02
Speaker
Oh no. He, uh, turns back around and gives the Sableye three more cups of coffee. You're not good for a person's health. Sableye's, uh, what's his name? Caffeine Bob but sits down and he is, like, actively having a seizure, but somehow still acting, quote unquote, normal. As he walks in, he's like- Walter just looks disgusted and slowly walks away. Like, nope, nope, I'm done. Going home, going to bed. Going home, going to bed.
00:41:30
Speaker
Well, do you go back to the hotel? I'll see you later. Don't get paid enough for this. I'm going. I'm just gonna go to that toucan. Go. Go toucan. Just gonna get some questions. All right. Well, let me see if I can talk to the guy. I can. I can. I think I can vibe with him. Okay. I need you to roll animal handling. That's hilarious. The most slowest creature is trying to make friends with the creature. Basically creature on crack.
00:41:57
Speaker
Can Bruce roll in, uh, what? You said we can roll investigation on people? Animal handling is beauty. I don't have a beauty, so let's go. Is he gonna bite you? Fourteen, you can understand his mutterings, basically. And basically, you just hear him say, coffee, coffee! I need more coffee! Coffee! Coffee, coffee, coffee! Stop! Get some help! Alright. Can Bruce roll investigation from afar?
00:42:25
Speaker
I need more coffee! What do you want? Okay. I just needed to ask you some questions. We we were told that you might have be a suspect in the in the in the bank robbery and we just needed to see you if you know anything about it. Crazy guy up there was talking about a bank robbery! I need more coffee! I want this to be crazy.
00:42:45
Speaker
And we, um, a Pecha Berry cures poison. Can we, um, if we feed him the Pecha Berry, will he, uh, will he come down from his, uh, caffeine high? Sure. Are you gonna try and lace your coffee with Pecha Berry or are you just like trying to feed it to him? Uh, try to feed it to him. Alright, so he comes back with four more cups of coffee, which but are already gone by the time he sits down.
00:43:10
Speaker
Wata, Bruce, can you two like hold him down while we interrogate him? Wata's gone. He's staying outside. He's done with him. Wata's gone. You're saying a side word. I'm going to say Selena and the crew are. Because I've once again forgotten about Selena. Hey Booey, what if we send an Abyss and Brie to hold him down? I feel like we're not gonna have much success interrogating him while he's like this. Good luck holding there down the man with crackhead energy. Exactly.
00:43:39
Speaker
and that surrounded and is in the public but everyone is watching this you know what I have an idea this might be a little stupid but I what if I challenge him to like a like a garlic knots eating competition it's like once you full on bread though you ain't gonna be moving very much you're challenging a dude who tries to explain shit
00:44:03
Speaker
We're in a Starbucks. What are you? You think I don't keep all all the stuff from my restaurant in my backpack? Fair enough. I don't think you have an infinite supply of garlic knots on you. Don't want to ask you, voices in the sky. I'll do what I want. Fair enough. We've got 99 Boca Burgers.
00:44:25
Speaker
I don't have ninety nine and money. I ate like 4 out of them last time. But Bockeburgers is not a bad idea. Actually, why don't we just pull all our Bockeburgers together and we do that? I don't think we need that many. I mean, I'd probably eat like 200 of them. Yeah, but we don't need to eat food. Doesn't he just eat material? Doesn't he just eat gyms? Walter, you're not in the room. i'm no I'm just saying it. I'm just saying it to myself. don't Don't they only eat gyms? If that material is made of coffee, then maybe.
00:44:56
Speaker
Dip it in coffee dip your bokeh burke mcgrinnell's in coffee. Oh Can I try feeding him the Pecha berry? Yeah, sure roll animal handling. animal What um, what is that? It's beauty I'm not gonna have a roll anyway I'll have him roll animal handling. Yo, I got a g nat 20. Oh my gosh. He saw it started falling. It looks like another coffee cup. And he eats it. And the second it touches the back of his throat, like instantaneously, he stops shaking.
00:45:57
Speaker
I have a question. Is Caffeine like the real name? did did Did they give you that when you were born or or hatched? Or or did they is that something people just started to call are you? No, no. Ian is my middle name. My name is Caffe.
00:46:19
Speaker
to know more about the bank property? I've heard of it in the newspaper. What of it? Where were you when it happened? Probably sitting in this chair right here. All right. um Can the Gyarados over there attest to that?
00:46:41
Speaker
Do you know like an Applin named Barry? He always claims to be outside of the of the bank. He's always there. And you're always here. That's kind of a coincidence. and No, that is not a coincidence. That just means he's always there and I'm always here, so... Like, that's just two people doing their own thing. Sounds like you guys have perfect alibis. I... I think that's what that seems about, right?
00:47:04
Speaker
Yeah, just somehow somehow your name ended up on a list of people for us to check out, but maybe it was a mistake. We'll we'll get this sorted out real quick. Okay, thank you. Yeah, no problem. Alright, thank you. bob And then I go over to the Gyarados. So Gyarados, what's your name? My name is... He like scratches his head with his fin. My name is... Fuck, what's my name?
00:47:33
Speaker
No, that's not his name. His name is Fuck. Joe. Perfect. I love it. Whiskers. All right, that's his name now, guys. His name is Joe, and this coffee shop is called Box of Joe. No, the store is called Sal's Box, and how his name is Joe Fuck. Joe Fuck. I love Joe. Joe Fox, man. He man-man.
00:47:58
Speaker
Joe fucks hard.
00:48:01
Speaker
ah Okay. ah So ah Joe looks at you and he's like, oh yeah? Can I help you? Okay. Yeah, Mr. Fuck. I love this. So but um what days of the week do you work here? I work Monday through Friday. The shop is closed on weekends.
00:48:24
Speaker
okay uh are you uh when does it open when is it what are the what are the hours of the shop are you are you just here from for the whole time pretty much this is my business sauce box okay um do you ever do you ever take wait lunch breaks are we sure it's not sauce fucks That is what I just said. I was wondering if any of you guys picked up on that.
00:49:03
Speaker
Nope. Might not have heard that. I heard Sawz box. Sawz box. Now listen, little kids, if you're listening to this, blame your parents. They let you watch this. Don't blame us. No, blame us. For sure. Don't blame us, yes. We'll go to the table for you. Don't worry. I was out voting. This is the way. So, Mr. Joe, um...
00:49:25
Speaker
Do you ever take a lunch break or anything? No. Okay. He eats on the clock. Joe fucks all along. Indeed, I eat sitting on a clock. I'm sorry, what? I don't need the attitude right now. No, that's why I know I was joking. There should be no fuckery going on. Oh, there's plenty of that. So Joe, Joe, that's Savly over there. Is he always there? Yeah, he's my main business.
00:49:55
Speaker
Okay, and he just does he like he just comes here when it opens and then he's here until closing time Not only that but he sleeps here during closing time, too. Oh Wow, okay You just left him staying here. I mean if he would call us sleeping and he kind of goes into this like wide-eyed trance.
00:50:17
Speaker
What is in your coffee? Wait, hang on. Do Sableye ever close their eyes? Start their eyes like gems? That's what I was about to ask. No. They're always open. They're all the gems. I'm not an anatomologist. Yeah, that's why you barista. Indeed. I'm trying to cabern. He's too stupid to realize it. The sauce book's the honor. You're outside still, Walter.
00:50:46
Speaker
I'm yelling this. No, I'm kidding. Did you see Walter screaming through the glass and like Selena and Biss and Bree are like staring at you weirdly? Um, Joe. Yup, that's my name. Have you heard anything about a bank robbery? Yeah, I read about it in the newspaper a couple weeks ago. Why? I was just, we're, um, we're investigating. So we just want to, we're just wondering if you know anything about it. I'm not like on a suspect list or something, am I? No, no, we're just,
00:51:32
Speaker
Thank you very much. I think we'll be on our way. Okay, then. So, Hikaru, was that productive? did Did you get anything out of him?
00:51:44
Speaker
Yeah, yeah, um, Caffeine Bob's alibi checks out. We still haven't rolled investigation on Caffeine Bob, right? That's the other thing that we have to do for checking off the little info box, whatever.
00:52:02
Speaker
Are you sure you want to investigate him? Do we have to? like Bruce just wants to... but It's the the other... I don't think investigation is the right word. It's the same word we were using once. Inside.
00:52:15
Speaker
Great. What was the other one? Oh, Interrogate was the other one. You guys basically... Interrogate! Yeah, we did the Interrogation. There was another thing that we had to do that we rolled forward. Investigate. It was investigation. Yeah. Investigation and Interrogate. Yeah. Is this where we get to hold them up against the wall and... point a blast seed at them? Okay. What now? Well... Stop wanting to blast your seed on people. Okay. I got my seed walking, not in the room. Yeah, like... Well...
00:52:45
Speaker
Because Alibi checks out, we don't have to be like, we don't have to get, like, gang up on him, okay? We don't have to be Bad Cop. Haru. Bad Cop is fun, though. Feels like I can really let loose, and go all out, and no one's gonna- and I'll never see these people again. Like, I can do whatever. Just starts the evil Sami arc. Oh boy. Oh, uh, Caffeinebop, one more thing. Uh, you look at him and he is starting to twitch. Oh no.
00:53:15
Speaker
doing that big smile on his face oh do whatever you need to do with him before he um hyper again the The investigation part wasn't talking to them.
00:53:27
Speaker
That was the thing. He goes into detective mode like Batman. He turns on detective mode and he sees all the clues. It's a good thing we're not really ah too suspicious of this guy because I did roll a six plus one seven investigation on this guy. You don't notice anything
00:53:53
Speaker
You don't notice anything out of the ordinary other than what I've already described. He is starting to twitch harder and harder now, and it seems like the patch-up area is losing effect on him. This guy's got one hell of a metabolism. Okay, so now we're going to cut outside to, um, Walter, Selena, Obisipri, and, uh, Jake, I need you to roll a d20. You already know it for her.
00:54:18
Speaker
Uh, 15. Alright, you have to roleplay based on that roll now. no no no no this is the end of it when they come out this is the end of it when they come out this is what you were doing while they were in there you put this on yourself how no I didn't see yep you literally asked for this key DM I thought it's gonna just be afterwards after there crap you did this to yourself <unk> gotten that one now i something No, you rolled a 15. I know. Oh, goodness flirting. How? What's chilling? I'm making Jake extremely uncomfortable. What's chilling? You're making me flirt with a claytian.
00:55:08
Speaker
yeah You asked for this. Yeah, but I thought it was just gonna be end of it. I didn't think I'd actually- No, what? He's still into it. Can I roll for flirting with Selena? That doesn't mean you get out of flirting with Selena. You literally asked for it. Selena, he thought it would get an off-mic thing where he could just roll and you give him the results of how the flirting went. Yeah, like progression bar. Anyway, uh- Nah, bruh. You gotta hit that. So how-
00:55:41
Speaker
wow I'm just imagining Sammy's like looking at Walter and Selena outside and you just yell at this girl. Yo man, he's about to hit that. Oh my goodness. Come to the window, quick. Look, look, look. Okay, I need Walter to roll investigation. ah Perception, perception. Um, what's up there?
00:56:08
Speaker
I think that's just... ah Beauty Beauty? Uh, 14. Okay, you can see Sammy staring at you, face smushed against the window. I see him, I just shut up.
00:56:23
Speaker
Walter ain't flirting with Sammy nearby, he knows you're... Selena just... it'sele but got this, man! Yeah, Selena just looks at you weirdly. Walter, I'm rooting for ya!
00:56:36
Speaker
Selena can clearly see you. She's like, what are you guys talking about? All righty, then. And she turns away or rather, she looks at you guys and she's like, uh, so who are we doing next? I don't know how that went, but I can judge by your guys's actions that this guy is not on our primary suspect list. He isn't. Nobody's got good taste in coffee. OK. Never really like coffee myself.
00:57:06
Speaker
So we've already hit up, uh, who was it? The, um, the, go the gal at the garden. We have hit bear the Applin caffeine, the Bob Sabley in midnight and. so
00:57:23
Speaker
Yeah. Uh, let me look at my notes. You guys, you guys still have Zazu Vickers and goose. Yes. The next one that is closest to you is Vickers, the Octillery.
00:57:36
Speaker
Wait. I thought other this guy was in the torch. 2K. I may have said that. I'm creating this right off the cuff. so Right now, Vicaracy Octiller is the closest one to you. He is like ah five blocks down. but Okay. I guess we go there.
00:58:00
Speaker
Hello, everybody. My name is Sean. Welcome to the midsection. Thank you for listening to our episode. in the description of the episode you will find the links to our discord where you can find all of our links to our socials and to our patreon if you wish to support us we would absolutely appreciate that we would also love it if you could spread the word if you would tell a friend or family or a dog whoever some random stranger in the park tell anyone you know mystery dungeon a path through time those guys know what's up they got a good show spread the word and uh give us a rating and your podcast player of choice
00:58:35
Speaker
Now it's time to credit the songs used here in the episodes. We have Highright Town from Pokemon XD, Galadarmus, and Coliseum. Fawful is there from Mari and Center, Lo-Fi, Lo-Fi Remix by Glitch X City. Now, let's get back to the episode, and let's talk to Vickers the Actillery.
00:59:10
Speaker
OK, so you guys go to Victor the Octolery's place and you see a house. It's like in a cartoon when like the house itself is made of explosives. Not like in Minecraft where you you make TNT houses sometimes, but like ah there's like fireworks sticking out of the windows. There's like a gigantic nukes on the top. And this guy is clearly manufacturing explosives. I have no idea what you're talking about with Minecraft. You can do that. Just make a house out of place blocks down and make a house out of TNT.
00:59:39
Speaker
Seems like a very bad idea. It does. Real quick above board. What day did the bank robbery happen? On a Wednesday. That's what that's my... I don't think it really matters. Sean, you said you did the math on this.
00:59:56
Speaker
I did, but I didn't have days of the week. There weren't days ever specified of what days things happened. and It just said, this is the day passed. least how many days slept That's all he ever said. Strangely, you did outside because the last time you recorded, I actually did, you know, put a name on that. So that's yeah, it's on a Wednesday. Yeah, it was a Wednesday. So two Wednesdays ago. Sure. OK. Yeah.
01:00:21
Speaker
at 2 p.m. Just so I know what to ask. Bruce, you may want to stay back. Yeah, yeah. I mean, I'm not that hot when my sleeves aren't lit. So not like I'd be dumb enough to light up my flames in a place like that. What are you talking about? Are you always hot? ah As I say, Bruce is better. You always better at flirting when he's not meaning to. He's got fire. He's a fire type. He's got so many things he can do.
01:00:52
Speaker
I'm a blue dog. You, uh, get up to the door and the, uh, door knocker is made of dynamite. ah After you, Sammy. it's oh I don't, I don't, I don't think, um, our electric friend and fire friend are good right here. Yeah, that's very true. Um, and you know, you and doors, you guys don't get along every time you touch a door. brand I know my punches are strong, but I don't cause explosion with my punches yet.
01:01:23
Speaker
yet bro if you touch this door it would explode oh yeah it's same we going in solo all right on one one second oh no all right you're safe for now the door knocks and it did not explode
01:01:41
Speaker
I told you not to touch the door. Look at these officials. How are these things being made? Like, seriously, some people could sue if the Gyarados could. That thing's not at a size further height. The door opens, and you just see, like, a bunch of ingredients inside. But we also see an Octillery, and he's like, oh, hi there. Can I help you? He's got, like, he's wearing, uh, sorry, he's wearing steampunk glasses and has, like, a big handlebar mustache that curls into a spiral.
01:02:10
Speaker
Hey, um... And no hat? It sounds like you would wear a hat. He's wearing a steampunk hat with a card sticking out on the brim. Pleasure to meet you. Oh, he's cool. I like him. Indeed. Can I help you? Uh, you must be Vickers, right? Yes, we're with the police. We're here and just getting the robbery. You're not here to take my explosives, are you? No. I don't want to have to hit this button. I really don't. And he holds up a big rush of money to be here for that. We're not even part of the police. We're independent contractors.
01:02:38
Speaker
Mm, I see, I see. So what are you here for then? He says putting the big red button away. Uh, yeah, so we're, we're here about a... We're here about a bank robbery that happens to go. Oh, yeah, that's the one I, uh, that's the one that happened, uh, just across the city, isn't it? Yeah. Yeah, I heard about it. Yeah, it um... Well, do you, do you happen to know anything about it? So you happen to be on the sus list. What were you that day? What were you doing? Why, why are you on the sus list? He slowly brings out the big red button.
01:03:08
Speaker
And it's like, I don't know, you guys are talking about it. Guys, let me handle this. Can I eat the button? Uh oh. Go ahead and roll strength. You're gonna eat his arm too. You're gonna eat his arm. Go have sushi.
01:03:24
Speaker
Roll a post strength if you roll below a five bad things happen. Or, I'm sorry, if he rolls below a five. You know, he's an octopus. His strength's gonna be incredible. 16 plus one is 17. Go to 14, dammit. Okay, so you successfully take the button from him. And he's like, you know that thing is actually live, right? But what about my backup? He starts pulling out a second red button. I said I was gonna eat the button. You are not eating that. Don't tell me you are eating this.
01:03:55
Speaker
Are you gonna eat the button? um that was That's what I asked for. You take a chomp out of the button, and somewhere from inside the house you show... Run for it! Wait, and no, no, I don't chomp the button. I put the whole thing in and swap. Yeah, damnly hey that presses the button. Yeah. and you careful had does throat be If you use it!
01:04:16
Speaker
Dux here was like, fuck, we got 30 seconds to get the hell out of Dux. And he starts running down the road. I fucking book it. Fuck this, I'm quite tacking away. Hold on. lot there Is there a random dynamite on the Can I grab some of the random dynamite he's got around? and Sure, you can grab. Alright, how many can I grab? The closest thing to you is the door handle.
01:04:45
Speaker
It's made of dynamite. Yes. Roll a d20. Roll for... Not 20. Can I just hit the whole door? Yes. Now the whole door is made of dynamite and you have all of it. Why? I break it off. It compresses down into 10 bundles of TNT.
01:05:09
Speaker
Alright, 10 bundles, that's gonna be important later. Alright, you guys just hear an explosion that half-defends you guys. That's the entire neighborhood explodes. And add terrorism to the charge. So, you guys have now done some domestic terrorism. I bet you fell in your list. Alright, listen. not It wasn't our fault. The octolary's like, well, I guess I'm homeless now.
01:05:38
Speaker
Oh, you weren't gonna comply. You weren't gonna be friendly and answer our questions. Listen, you took a button, you swallowed it for some real weird reason. Listen, you won't tell that we, that Sammy clicked the button. We won't tell them how many bombs that they were yours. You didn't get all of the bombs. There's still the nuke that was in the basement, but that's besides that. What? Oh, it was part of the- Is this turnip boy commits? Yeah, turnip boy commits tax fraud. This is turnip boy commits tax fraud. Yup.
01:06:07
Speaker
I love that game so much. I know. They made a sequel, turn a boy, it robs a bank. Like it was so fun too. And he pulls out a second red button, he's like, I'm not letting you touch this. Oh no! No, Sammy, you stay away. Mr. Vickers, my dad is a real estate broker. See? If you help us with our investigation today, I can ask him to find you a new home.
01:06:37
Speaker
I see, I see. It'll be the best home, it'll be the best home you could, you'd ever, there ever was in Volkenburg. Um, you want that? Or there's that, or his mom is, can't, can't, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no,
01:06:53
Speaker
does's not give a domestic terrorist information of a big business that that bruce knows owns Well, you guys are having a conversation. You see a squad of blast always running down the street wearing sunglasses.
01:07:11
Speaker
fall to war ah So this town has a fight if I'm going to walk well back home and get out speech. Well, they got terrorists here. We didn't. Yeah, they run past towards houses.
01:07:23
Speaker
Yeah, go get him. Okay. ah The Vickers are like, uh, so what help do you guys need? He says playing with his mustache, like a distinguished gentleman. Wait, how does Alex Killery have a mustache? Yeah, it does. They don't, it's fake. They got him with like a dollar nine, nine fake mustache store. He's wearing one of like the incognito glasses with the big nose. so leg No one ever knows my true identity.
01:07:50
Speaker
Okay, Mr. Vickers, um do you you know about explosives? so um Indeed. Do you know if it's possible to create like a device that that can release like sleep powder from it that and put everybody in the room to sleep?
01:08:08
Speaker
Ah, I see. It sounds like you are talking about something alchemical. This is not something that relates to a move for it. You cannot use two moves at the exact same time. What it sounds like to me is somebody. I'm assuming this has to do with the bank robbery, correct? Yeah. You are dealing with an alchemist. That is what you are dealing with. Well, do you know any alchemists in the city?
01:08:36
Speaker
I do not off the top of my head. I am the top alchemist currently, but I mainly deal with like, you know, dangerous stuff. Well, I guess what you described was dangerous, but I mean like, like he pulls out the second red button. Dangerous, if you know what I mean. Hey, what did you get TNT anyway? I make it myself. What do you get the ingredients? I grew it. You grew TNT, he grew it. TNT is all you have, right?
01:09:04
Speaker
good He found a way to grow it on trees. He only had teens in the house, right? He grew the blast seeds. Yes, yeah, yeah, what he said. And then grew a blast seed. And then nuke in the basement. Well, that wound is part of my Manhattan project. What's a Manhattan? What? I don't know. That's just what I call it. I think we're asking too many questions about the dude that holds the trigger that could vaporize us. Yeah, he's slowly with the withering button.
01:09:32
Speaker
One more thing, Vickers. Yeah, what's up? ah Where where were you two Wednesdays ago at 2 p.m.? Most likely down. and There's two places I usually go. I couldn't tell you exactly what day because I was too long ago, but half the time I'm in my bunker creating explosives and half the times I'm over in the black market selling explosives. Take your pick. So where's the black market? That is highly classified information mess.
01:10:01
Speaker
I'll give you a TNT door back.
01:10:05
Speaker
right I'll give you all the TNT that I took from your house, by the way. I'm slowly ripping in the door and putting it in my bags. There! That's one bundle. That's another bundle. I can always just grow more. It's not like I'm poor or anything. Do you have to have a license to grow that? To grow blast seeds? No. What? No. This country needs some new laws.
01:10:31
Speaker
Um, maybe, but it is not my place to come over here for. So, um, is there anything else you guys need or may you have the number of that real estate agent you were talking about? Uh, you don't happen to have, you didn't happen to have any other chemicals in that, in that house, right? Did you? I had gunpowder, nitroglycerin, black powder. um The cocaine I supplied to the coffee shop.
01:10:58
Speaker
josh Wait, hold on, wait, what? it' just re sort of What did he say? The cocaine that I give to the coffee house and what they put in the coffee. Ah, that looks what it says. What? no, i what? What? Did he say caffeine or cocaine? He said cocaine. Caffeine. Oh no. Hell yeah. okay Anyway, I think you're all innocent here. Anyway, oh wait, what's a number? Um, can you show me where the, uh, the real estate agent is? Um, um, above board, our phone, our phone's a thing. No, the GBA's. Yeah, GBA's are a thing. Yeah, but not everybody has a GBA. You need to be rich to have it. Rich people have right now. Give him the address of your parents' place. I can give him my business card. All right, sure. Yeah, we'll, um.
01:11:55
Speaker
Your pizza piece must get blown up. I guess I could give him my dad's business card. Okay. So yeah, he takes a business card and is like, I will send a letter in media. Thank you. Yeah. Have a nice day. he says yeah This guy's still writing a letter. Like he can't call me. I'll send him a package immediately. I'll send him a package. Oh no. Oh no.
01:12:22
Speaker
why Why is this episode so sexual? not I don't think Jacob is sleeping. I understood it, but... Okay, so... You guys have enough time to interrogate one more person if you so wish.
01:12:41
Speaker
but didn't two care interrogationzazi and can Let's go to Zazu, guys. Honestly, I'm just getting more leveled up. I got TNT now. Uh, two cannon, uh, what was his name, not figures. Zazu. Zazu, yeah, yeah, Zazu. Sorry, I'm trying to scroll
Questioning Zazu: The Media Angle
01:13:00
Speaker
up through my notes. I have so many pages of notes. So, um, yeah, you guys walk for a bit. You guys have to walk through the rubble that was the neighborhood. Um, in a nine square of nine, all of those houses were absolutely decimated. And you can see the fire department trying to, uh,
01:13:21
Speaker
put out the fires, and um nobody notices you as you walk through the destruction. You know, that button was really spicy. Shut up, Sammy. just And you guys walk through, and eventually you guys get to Zazu's house. It is a very large building. And yeah, it's just a regular house, but it's very large.
01:13:47
Speaker
Hey guys, by the way, you know, I want to make a bet. Let's pull that substance licks. Let's all put up a bet on us who we think is gonna be Who's this that's who the main zone is gonna be I Got I got I got hunter bokeh on the police of the arcanine What On the Honda police officer that gives the job the art Bill yeah bill system name no i i i don't think that's who it was oh come on he made all this bs list just to lead us on a goose chase and again and he gave us a list that wouldn't be to make him seem innocent yeah but how how could he that's pretty clever how could he've uh sprayed the powder he could just and he could have not done it but he could have hired some
01:14:38
Speaker
I'm just saying who's the main boss, not who pulled off the heist, who's the main guy. True. Walt has had some pretty fire ideas lately, guys, I think we should listen to him. Give me a fake mustache and a fake badge, he becomes smart. Who? Since when did he get a fake mustache?
01:14:54
Speaker
I stole it. I don't. OK, OK. OK, OK. You had a spare one. No, we're doing a Simpson style flashback. I need you to roll sleight of hand. Cool. Four, no.
01:15:13
Speaker
Okay, you do not have a fake mustache. We flash back to the present. There's like a blinking outline. over Black eye. They got knocked. because you had you in Come back with him. There's a black eye that actually punched him. because he tries take it shoot And we do another flashback and have someone enroll investigation on Vickers. You cannot. Darn it. why weren We forgot about that again. I noticed that. We got confused with the sexual comments.
01:15:42
Speaker
So you guys rise off yourselves. I didn't even hear those. Okay, so we're outside Zazu's. Yep, it looks surprisingly normal compared to the one you were just at. Alright. Well, that's relief. That's never a good sign. He's got something weird in here.
01:16:02
Speaker
Alright, so I guess we go in. It's like an apartment building. um knockout Yeah, it's it's just a house. But it's very large. Oh, oh. yeah i just I assumed it was like an apartment building and like Zazu just lives in one of the apartments. Hey, Kyra, you gotta stop breaking into places. I'm blowing them up. Kyra, Evelyn, you gotta stop breaking into places. Eh? I haven't broken it.
01:16:31
Speaker
you I don't break into places no no like you forget about the doors and you always just walk in you don't knock no no that's just that's just how apartment buildings aren't where I live you gotta get buzzed in at least yeah you get buzzed in or there's a doorman Yeah, I was just saying, we have a A door man? Like a front door fish? A front door fish? Okay, do we want to make this an apartment building? I'm sure so. He's a news reporter, he's written- No way he- Hold on, okay. I'm sorry, I just got something to say. No way a news reporter that's famous is living in that. He's having his own house.
01:17:12
Speaker
ah he's you said he has a pen have a penthouse Yeah, he so was writing an article. I didn't say he was famous. oh i thought he was like the head guy No. No, he's just a reporter.
01:17:24
Speaker
Then this totally matches it. You got the best building in your car. You did say earlier in the episode he lives in an apartment building across town from the city. Okay, well I guess it's a... I guess we get to bring back everyone's favorite character. You get to the apartment building in front door fish, is there? Let me at him! Oh boy. Keep Walter away from that fish.
01:17:50
Speaker
So he brings out the dynamite. We don't know if it's the same. Very slowly for dynamite back into Walter's bag. So he raises it out again. Front door fish sees a guy who's like, oh, you guys, you guys are from the hospital, aren't you? Yes, we are. What? Yeah. That's the wrong hospital. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. No, no, it's not. The one in Gail Beach, right? Yeah. Why are you here then if you're from the hospital?
01:18:20
Speaker
I work 13 jobs. I got fired at the line. This guy's mother tried to kill him. um I just do. Sleep is for the week.
01:18:35
Speaker
Well, Mr. Fish, um were ah we're here to see Zazu. ah We're with the police. Oh, police? May I see your padzus? That is unless you're also a suspect, Mr. Frontoa Fish. Mr. Frontoa Fish, in what?
01:18:49
Speaker
yeah Murder, I mean that's the robbery you guys are gonna we're investigating Yes, I know what I'm investigating There's a robbery at the bank of a thing and that was on a pedestal two weeks ago on a Wednesday at 2 p.m. Don't challenge me front door fish. I know what would What's this? no i'm kidding you pull out the or Face bombs it just funny Alright, so ah yeah, he's like, uh, so you should have to see Sazu. Yep, that'll be second floor, uh, third, uh, apartment, three, two, two, two beat fucking apartment, 23. 23, okay. Why does everybody, why does everybody keep using that man's last name at us? What? Fuck.
01:19:34
Speaker
Well, did I say that? I didn't even notice. Anyway, ah he opens the door for you guys and you guys can now answer. Thank you very much, Mr. Fish. Alright, and you guys head up and knock on the door. And you guys see a very big beak attached to a Pokémon. And that Pokémon is Zazu the Two Cannon. And he is holding a large team paper.
01:19:59
Speaker
He's like, oh, hi. And he looks very angry. He's got paint. He's yeah. In the in the room, you can see he's got a big printing press in the back and like a big ornate desk. So as everyone else is talking to this toucan toucan and Bruce is going to roll investigation on him and the but you whatever.
01:20:23
Speaker
OK. Get it out of the way immediately. There we go. 18 plus one 19 All right, his feathers look very ruffled. He looks very tired He uh by the fact that he's holding a piece of paper You can tell he was currently working on something when you guys knocked on the door You can see the printing press in the back is busy churning out newspapers. So he might not just be a nobody after all Um, so he does seem to have a name for himself
01:20:55
Speaker
Do you like the only one that works at this newspaper thing? ah This is my private newspaper. Why? That just seems like you live on the staff. Yeah, I've run this whole thing by myself. I'm constantly running around doing articles. So who's your camera man? Who's the guy who was the person that took notes on what you were saying about the, um, vault doors? Oh, that's my brother. Uh, you saw.
01:21:21
Speaker
And you see Zuzaw in the room as well. And he's like sitting over on another desk. I said earlier, I did everything by myself. I lied. I was with Zuzaw. All right. What is this paper called? It's the neighborhood news. Very stupid, but okay. Thank you. Thank you. I appreciate
Suspicions and Alibis
01:21:40
Speaker
that. You know anything about the robbery that happened two weeks ago?
01:21:46
Speaker
Yeah, the one people keep pestering me about because I wrote an article about it literally the day before it got robbed. Yeah, big coincidence. So what? Convenient? Yeah. Oh, real convenient. Wait, I have a question. Where are you? and Did he write the same article that Bruce read in arc one? Yes. Wait. Zuza or Zazu? Zazu. Zazu.
01:22:09
Speaker
He wouldn't have been the one to write that article because the article I read in ah ARC 1 was about the robbery, not about the vaults. I give you a brief blurb about it. Wait, no, you're right. It was about the robbery the day after. Yeah. Yeah, you're you're right. no you're yeah So, yeah, no. Zazu was not the one. Especially since yeah this is a private newspaper and the art the newspaper reading is for Gale Beach, not Volkenburg. Yes. So, no. Zazu was not that person.
01:22:39
Speaker
Okay. Um, can we look at the, um, how often do you, how often do you print, um, issues of the newspaper? Weekly on Sundays. Why? Can we see the last two issues? Are you paying? You could just go. I mean, we'll just, we don't want to, we don't want to take them. We just want to take a look and see, you know, you don't have copies laying on them. Get you off your hands. Sure. We're kind of busy at the moment.
01:23:08
Speaker
and he lets you guys on inside and you guys see a bunch of papers sitting on outside he's like digging through them and he finally pulls out two copies like yep these are the one the last two ones we did this one he hold that a hand has the article that we wrote up about outdoors and now the DM has to create an article out of thin air so that's fun uh walta takes a picture also that means this article would have come out after the robbery if it was made on a Tuesday, it wasn't printed until the following Sunday. Well, no. Yeah. So Zazu was at the bank taking notes the day before the robbery. Yeah. It wasn't printed until the next Sunday. OK. Right. So the the article that rant, the article about vault doors, was it before or after? The article was written before, but it was published after.
01:24:07
Speaker
Sunday after. yeah Yes. Okay. I think we're asking him the wrong question. By the way, is Zazu, did anyone to ever ask you about information about the vault doors besides the you making it, you writing about it before that the bank robbery? No, it was it's just a dry day and you just happened to be a business in the area. So we stopped in and asked this SPL about her business and she just showed us the bank vaults.
01:24:38
Speaker
She said they were like top-of-the-notch bank vaults with like super security You need like a special key in order to give it that only at the guards have and she like opened it up for me No, it's like super sick like literally like two feet thick vault door. It's crazy so she gave personal security away information I was talking can like a child of thick and we talking like oatmeal thick It was thicker than oatmeal I can tell you that So you said we. Did you go to the bank with somebody? Yeah, she was out here. She was the one taking out supplies. You and Zuzah together, okay. I just want to take a look around. Do you happen to have any like... I wonder if you have any kitchen supplies, any like spices, powders? Maybe we got some cooking supplies, why?
01:25:29
Speaker
So so at the bit ah we' we heard that um during the bank robbery there was a sweet scent and and every all the Pokemon who were there at the time got knocked out. um They lost consciousness. And then they just... Yeah. I know. Oh, you've heard that? right People keep writing mean letters to us saying that we use sweet scents and knocked all those Pokemon out. Do you have anything that could give off a sweet scent?
01:25:57
Speaker
I mean, I know sweet sense, but what of it? Does your brother know sleeping sleeping powder? No. Also, we weren't even there at the day the rink robbery happened. Like I said, the interviewees took the day before. We were up here writing our article for the upcoming weekend. But you're the only ones who can vouch for each other? Uh, no. Silver can... Maybe the doorman's hand too. Silver was here. in the guards Well, so could front door fish downstairs, right?
01:26:28
Speaker
It's not like I tell him everywhere I go, but sure You probably would have seen me leaving but I was like two weeks ago. So good luck. She remembers anything Wait, let me get this straight. You're saying you were with silver. Yeah She was telling me about silver says she was gone. She was not in town on a business trip No, she was definitely at the bank Silver lied to us wait the silver wait, well suspicious of sale the whole time did she say that she was on the business trip the whole week or what what did she when did she I asked for the specific day and he said silver was at the bank on the specific day of the robbery no he's saying that silver was there on the day before the robbery and could tell you and
01:27:20
Speaker
I think he's assuming that Silver was there the day of the robbery and could thus tell us that he was not there the day of the robbery, is what I'm getting from this. When did when did Silver say she was on the business trip? and the day isnt oh just The day? Yeah, just the day of the robbery. Which is convenient.
Conclusion and Technology Humor
01:27:41
Speaker
Really convenient she left the day before the robbery.
01:27:44
Speaker
Yeah, but there would have had to be like... i want It takes like 12 hours to get from Volkenburg to Gale Beach. And then 12 hours back, it's like... We could go check the people that make the train and ask if she got by the ticket. There's no way she got there in time. If she did on foot. I want to ask Front Door Fish to to so substantiate, corroborate their alibis. So yeah, you walk down and talk to him.
01:28:15
Speaker
Yeah. Uh, Mr. Fish. Why are we leaving? So were you, so, uh, two weeks ago, were you, were you guarding the door? Yeah. This time all the time. This time all the time? Um, today's a Wednesday, right? No, today's Thursday. It's Thursday. Well, are you also here on Wednesdays? Yep.
01:28:38
Speaker
Okay. Did you see Zazu and Zuzu leave the building at all on two Wednesdays ago? They leave the building every day to do their articles and stuff. What time? I don't know. Like in the morning when they go out and they collect a bunch of stories. I mean, yeah. Okay. Okay. Thank you for that. Yep. I guess we'll be on our way. All right.
01:29:06
Speaker
And with that, I am going to end this episode. It is a little bit abrupt, but full disclosure, we are out of recording time for today. So um thank you guys for listening. ah We will join you guys next time for. I don't want to say anything, but now I'm not going to say anything. yes of wait All right. I have been Dakota, your PM, your DM, your GM. I have been Evelyn playing Hikaru. I've been Eli playing Bruce.
01:29:37
Speaker
I've been Sami and now two characters have blown up houses or burned them down. I play Walter and I'm dangerous now. I got TNT. I'm dangerous now. and You better not trip or something because Nitro, Glissor, and TNT is like... I'm dangerous now. Trust me.
01:29:55
Speaker
now he's doing first combat we get in i'm sorry but some doors are about to get blown open oh i should create a tnt item yeah i should absolutely do that yeah um yeah good we need to make damage we need to make some damage for it because regular is just a 3d6 aoe so you might not want to detonate it if you're anywhere near them throw it possibly just throw it i'm good yeah that'd be is so cool i don't want to uh we're going a bit of a tangent we'll talk about this later all right we will see you guys next time i forgot you could use discord on the browser who uses the app nobody not using the app i do
01:30:39
Speaker
I always use the app. I'm using the web page because I always use the web page. They went over this. Computers aren't for apps. That's what phones are for. Computers have websites. OK, so every video game you ever play is web based. Is that what I'm getting? I don't play games on my computer. OK, well, that's because you're old and crotchety. I'm hip. OK.
01:31:03
Speaker
I have apps on my computer. I'm hip like the new kids. Someone needs to put that in the Eclipse channel. I have apps on the computer. I'm the hip.