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Behind the Scenes with Matt Munson: The Reality of Dating After The Bachelorette
173 Plays1 year ago
In this episode of Bigger Talks, Eric discusses dating after starring on The Bachelorette with Matt Munson, a close friend and fellow alum from Season 13. They explore the complexities of life after reality TV, highlighting the personal growth and the deep connections that emerge from such a distinctive journey. They delve into how the show has shaped their personal development and public image, and examine how relationships evolve under the intense scrutiny of the media spotlight. Throughout this episode, they share insights on the balance between seizing new opportunities and the peace found in establishing a rhythm in life after the glare of reality TV stardom.
Also in this episode:
- Participants' experiences after reality TV often lead to significant personal growth and self-realization.
- Dating after participating in reality TV can be complex and significantly influenced by public perceptions.
- The importance of living authentically, venturing out of comfort zones, and exploring suppressed passions and potentials.
About Matt Munson:
Matt Munson is a TV Personality and Bachelor Franchise alum who has continued to spend time in front of the camera since his stint on reality tv. He most recently appeared in the boxing biopic “The Featherweight'' which has made its way around the festival circuit and is expected to be released later this year.
During his downtime Matt, a 39-year-old Connecticut native can often be found in the kitchen where he dabbles in all things culinary, or in the gym having been a fitness enthusiast for most of his life.
Follow Matt on Instagram: @Matt_Munson_
Check out Miracle Season’s collection: https://itsmiracleseason.co/collections/frontpage
Work with me: https://www.ericbigger.com/workwithme?utm_source=podcast&utm_medium=podcast&utm_campaign=work_with_m...
Connect with Simplified Impact: https://hubs.ly/Q02mVLDM0
Recommended
Transcript
Introduction to Bigger Talks and Guest, Matt Munson
00:00:05
Speaker
Welcome to Bigger Talks with Eric Bigger, a podcast dedicated to delving into unexpected conversations with a diverse range of guests.
00:00:13
Speaker
I'm your host, Eric Bigger, and I'm joining you each week to create an authentic space of dialogue about the subcultures of American life.
00:00:20
Speaker
Through engaging discussions with writers, actors, experts, and influencers, we will explore the strength of diversity and the transformational power of vulnerability.
00:00:32
Speaker
So let's dive in and discover the unexpected together on Bigger Talks.
00:00:40
Speaker
Bigger Talks, Bigger Talks.
00:00:43
Speaker
Listen, people, I'm excited.
00:00:44
Speaker
This is going to be an incredible episode.
00:00:47
Speaker
You don't understand.
00:00:48
Speaker
I feel like a kid again.
00:00:50
Speaker
I got Bachelorette, season 13, Rose Boys, one of my surf, mascot friends, Matt, months in the building.
00:00:59
Speaker
And we're going to talk about life after The Bachelorette, Bachelor in Paradise, Oats Reality TV,
00:01:06
Speaker
show, reminiscing.
00:01:08
Speaker
So we're going to bring you back into that portal of our season.
00:01:11
Speaker
There we go.
00:01:12
Speaker
Matt, how are you?
00:01:13
Speaker
I call him Matty Knight, Steve.
00:01:15
Speaker
But Matt, how's it going?
00:01:16
Speaker
How are you today?
00:01:17
Speaker
How you feeling?
00:01:18
Speaker
Welcome to Bigger Talks.
00:01:19
Speaker
I got to say, man, I appreciate you having me.
00:01:22
Speaker
It's been a minute since I downloaded these.
00:01:24
Speaker
So I had to dust the cobwebs off before I got on you today.
00:01:28
Speaker
So yeah.
00:01:29
Speaker
Where you been though?
00:01:30
Speaker
Where you been out here?
00:01:30
Speaker
You been here.
00:01:31
Speaker
Yeah, I've been there.
00:01:32
Speaker
I've been here.
00:01:32
Speaker
Hey, the people up there are amazing.
00:01:35
Speaker
You know, they're authentic and real, right?
00:01:38
Speaker
You could take the boy out of the East Coast, but you can never take the East Coast out of the boy.
00:01:42
Speaker
NCT area, baby.
00:01:44
Speaker
I'm coming back.
00:01:45
Speaker
People told me, Canada, we're coming back.
00:01:47
Speaker
That's what I hear, but I'll believe it when I see it.
00:01:49
Speaker
There we go.
00:01:50
Speaker
There we go.
00:01:52
Speaker
All right, man.
00:01:53
Speaker
So let's get into
Life After The Bachelorette and Forming Friendships
00:01:54
Speaker
it.
00:01:54
Speaker
So how has life been since people who don't know, you will know today, Matt and myself was on season 13 of The Bachelorette with Rachel Lindsay.
00:02:06
Speaker
And we went pretty far on the show.
00:02:08
Speaker
Matt got me out of a lot of dark spaces and places at the time.
00:02:12
Speaker
We became great friends.
00:02:14
Speaker
And we've been connected ever since our show has been aired from ourselves.
00:02:19
Speaker
And we're just here to bring back those energy and reminisce.
00:02:23
Speaker
But for the people who don't know and the people who do know, how has Matt been coached show altogether overall?
00:02:30
Speaker
What's new?
00:02:31
Speaker
What's the latest and greatest?
00:02:32
Speaker
How's life?
00:02:34
Speaker
That's a loaded question because truth be told, it's been a minute.
00:02:37
Speaker
It's been a minute since we've been on, right?
00:02:40
Speaker
We got almost a decade-long period of time that we get to look back on.
00:02:45
Speaker
We're lucky enough that we were able to have these moments where we reconnect because
00:02:49
Speaker
What people I think who are trying to understand what we went through, right?
00:02:54
Speaker
Because it is almost such a surreal situation that you never saw yourself in.
00:02:59
Speaker
And nobody tells you how to prepare for it.
00:03:01
Speaker
You know what I mean?
00:03:02
Speaker
We're just winging it.
00:03:03
Speaker
Making it up as we go.
00:03:04
Speaker
Flying by the seat of our pants.
00:03:06
Speaker
That's what they say, right?
00:03:07
Speaker
So I think what's cool for people who are fans of the show, you don't see a lot of the relationships that we, and the bonds that we build with one another while we're on air, right?
00:03:15
Speaker
Because you deal with one relationship and that's with the guy and the girl.
00:03:19
Speaker
And that's what everybody wants to see.
00:03:21
Speaker
But you don't see as much of the bromance as everybody likes to call it.
00:03:25
Speaker
You don't get to see as much of that.
00:03:27
Speaker
And the funny thing is that's what lasts after the show.
00:03:30
Speaker
After the cameras get put away and the lights go down and everything, that's what we get left with.
00:03:35
Speaker
So for a decade now, I've stayed closer with some people like yourself.
00:03:41
Speaker
I've faded off with other people, which...
00:03:43
Speaker
Sometimes I actually regret a little bit because it was such a special time.
00:03:48
Speaker
I mean, it's a once-in-a-lifetime thing, and if I were to have anybody try to connect to it and how they can relate it to something that they might have experienced in their own life,
00:03:59
Speaker
It's probably like having been in a fraternity or a sorority.
00:04:03
Speaker
I mean, it's a moment in time.
00:04:05
Speaker
Everybody's going through it together.
00:04:07
Speaker
And no one else can understand the history and the experiences that you've shared unless you were there in that moment in time.
00:04:13
Speaker
So for us, we're linked for life because we did something that's, face it, it's not real life.
00:04:20
Speaker
Like I said, it's surreal.
00:04:21
Speaker
Yeah, I mean, I think for me, I mean, for both of us, we didn't know where we were walking into when we got our limo for the first time.
00:04:28
Speaker
Shout out to Rachel Lindsay.
00:04:30
Speaker
Shout out to ABC.
00:04:31
Speaker
Shout out to Eli.
00:04:32
Speaker
Shout out to Bennett, Peter.
00:04:34
Speaker
Am I missing any producers named Eddie?
00:04:36
Speaker
Shout out to Shabby.
00:04:37
Speaker
Right.
00:04:38
Speaker
Lindsay.
00:04:39
Speaker
Don't forget Lindsay.
00:04:40
Speaker
Julie.
00:04:41
Speaker
Julie.
00:04:41
Speaker
Julie.
00:04:43
Speaker
Julie last week.
00:04:44
Speaker
You know, she was like, hey, how's Matt?
00:04:46
Speaker
I was like, Matt's great.
00:04:47
Speaker
I talked to him actually two days ago.
00:04:49
Speaker
Yeah.
00:04:49
Speaker
That's right.
00:04:50
Speaker
Cause he's from Connecticut.
00:04:51
Speaker
I'm from Connecticut.
00:04:51
Speaker
I was like, Oh, that's right.
00:04:52
Speaker
She's like, he said, to be honest, Eric, to be honest, you group of guys were probably like maybe the last season of like the real people before all this media stuff took place.
00:05:04
Speaker
So to people who don't know, Matt and I was on a show in 2017.
00:05:07
Speaker
So I think 2017, that was like the beginning phase and stages of Instagram deals and brand partnerships, throw my following,
00:05:18
Speaker
They get fame and all those things.
00:05:21
Speaker
We didn't know that before we went on to the show.
00:05:23
Speaker
We wasn't aware of that.
00:05:24
Speaker
They're actually casting people who have a father who might help the show, right?
00:05:28
Speaker
That's a good point, yep.
00:05:30
Speaker
But anyway, she's from Connecticut.
00:05:32
Speaker
She spoke highly of you.
00:05:33
Speaker
And she's OG, just like we are.
00:05:36
Speaker
now.
00:05:36
Speaker
We're the world.
00:05:37
Speaker
I think at this point, it's safe to classify ourselves as OGs.
00:05:40
Speaker
Yeah.
00:05:41
Speaker
So, you know, shout out to everybody from the show.
00:05:44
Speaker
Everybody will experience life with us.
00:05:46
Speaker
I mean, Matt did.
00:05:47
Speaker
Not only you did, you know, The Bachelor, you did Bachelor in Paradise.
Decision to Join Bachelor in Paradise and TV Portrayal
00:05:50
Speaker
That was a whirlwind, right?
00:05:51
Speaker
That was a different time.
00:05:53
Speaker
That was a whirlwind.
00:05:54
Speaker
Yeah.
00:05:54
Speaker
I would say, not to cut you off, but before I forget, because I forget now, I'm getting old enough.
00:06:01
Speaker
And I would regret forgetting one of my regrets, actually.
00:06:06
Speaker
is you come off The Bachelor and the wound is so fresh, right?
00:06:10
Speaker
Because it's such a magic carpet ride that you get pulled off of.
00:06:15
Speaker
In the fall, it's hard.
00:06:16
Speaker
You're out there cut off from civilization, basically.
00:06:20
Speaker
Everybody knows by now, people talk about it.
00:06:23
Speaker
No phones, no news, no television, no nothing, no social media.
00:06:27
Speaker
And you crash back into your normal life.
00:06:31
Speaker
Pretty soon after that, your phone rings and it's, do you want to go on Bachelor in Paradise?
00:06:35
Speaker
And it's hard to turn it down because the world we live in, popularity only lasts for so long.
00:06:41
Speaker
So it's like, are they going to want me next year?
00:06:42
Speaker
Probably not.
00:06:42
Speaker
So I got to strike while the iron's hot.
00:06:44
Speaker
But truth be told, looking back, if I had to do probably a few things differently, one of them would be, and you could say what it might be for you.
00:06:51
Speaker
But I would say that I would have waited a year.
00:06:53
Speaker
I would have just let everything cool down.
00:06:55
Speaker
I would have got back to normal.
00:06:57
Speaker
I would have gathered myself a little bit for whatever that's worth.
00:07:01
Speaker
And I would have waited and I would have gone out with you and Kenny King.
00:07:05
Speaker
Shout out Kenny King because- And definitely Joe who I've met, who is our kind of people, you know what I mean?
00:07:12
Speaker
Definitely he's a real dude.
00:07:14
Speaker
I would have waited a year.
00:07:15
Speaker
I formed a lot of relationships that I wouldn't have had if I didn't do that year with Iggy.
00:07:21
Speaker
I got closer with Dean than I ever thought I would.
00:07:24
Speaker
Diggy, yes, Diggy was there too.
00:07:26
Speaker
I got close with Diggy.
00:07:27
Speaker
I still talk to Diggy every week.
00:07:29
Speaker
That probably would have never happened if, in fact, I didn't go on with those guys.
00:07:33
Speaker
My biggest takeaway from it is it moves so fast.
00:07:37
Speaker
I don't move as fast as the show does.
00:07:39
Speaker
So when you're going through your cycle, so to speak, it almost is two steps ahead of you.
00:07:44
Speaker
So you almost have to catch yourself and realize, what am I doing?
00:07:47
Speaker
And how can I make this experience better?
00:07:50
Speaker
How can I, for all intents and purposes, how can I figure out this sort of disposition on camera?
00:07:56
Speaker
I went out of Pear Deck and I still was not really that comfortable with the camera.
00:08:00
Speaker
As people know, they didn't really see a ton of me.
00:08:02
Speaker
but just caught in a whirlwind and it doesn't slow down.
00:08:06
Speaker
Like a tornado?
00:08:07
Speaker
Yes, chaotic.
00:08:09
Speaker
Also, too, let's talk about that, right?
00:08:10
Speaker
Let's talk about being on TV, but not really being seen on TV, but even though the camera's on.
00:08:15
Speaker
So on our first season of The Bachelorette with Matt and myself, we went pretty far, made it to top six.
00:08:22
Speaker
We were in Switzerland together, right?
00:08:24
Speaker
Yeah, when we went on our... Three-on-one date, right?
00:08:27
Speaker
We're three-on-one, yeah.
00:08:28
Speaker
But here's the thing.
00:08:29
Speaker
So he was top six.
00:08:31
Speaker
So at that time, that's probably more than five weeks on TV, right?
00:08:35
Speaker
I think it was like six weeks, actually.
00:08:37
Speaker
Yeah.
00:08:38
Speaker
You didn't get to see much of him.
00:08:40
Speaker
You would think because he's there so long, you would see more.
00:08:43
Speaker
And so this is where we got to start thinking about the character building and the narrative they're trying to create to make TV opposing what the viewers think, right?
00:08:52
Speaker
Right, right.
00:08:52
Speaker
So when like you and Adam, I mean, shout out to Adam.
00:08:55
Speaker
He's a father now.
00:08:56
Speaker
He has two kids, two little boys.
00:08:58
Speaker
Looking happier than ever.
00:09:02
Speaker
Adam just celebrated a birthday.
00:09:03
Speaker
I think they just celebrated maybe an anniversary.
00:09:06
Speaker
Matter of fact, they got two beautiful children.
00:09:08
Speaker
So worked out well for them.
00:09:10
Speaker
I think for you in that space, for any of us, I mean, we never had no blueprint for what we were doing.
00:09:16
Speaker
So, the know not to go or to go to paradise, it's like, how do you know not to go and to go?
00:09:24
Speaker
You know, so for you on that position, being top six, not visibly seen on TV as you should, how did that make you feel emotionally and mentally?
00:09:33
Speaker
And what was your perspective after that when you had to make a decision?
00:09:37
Speaker
Did that teeter or have some type of influence on your decision to go to paradise?
00:09:43
Speaker
Yeah.
00:09:44
Speaker
That's a great question, because truth be told, that in that time and space, while the show is on TV, that's when they call you to go to Mexico.
00:09:54
Speaker
So you're basing your decision whether or not to do Paradise off of what your experience has been so far on The Bachelorette.
00:10:03
Speaker
And at that point, if I'm being completely honest with people, it was a little frustrating because as much as I was enjoying replaying this great experience back
00:10:13
Speaker
and getting to see a lot of the things I didn't see during the process.
00:10:18
Speaker
At the same time, people who turned their TV on to watch me, they were not necessarily fans of the show, but they wanted to watch because they wanted to see me.
00:10:29
Speaker
And then they're not seeing me.
00:10:32
Speaker
And I realized that you're not seeing me.
00:10:35
Speaker
It probably didn't bother me as much as it bothered them not to see me.
00:10:39
Speaker
I was so nervous about if you did see me, how was it going to look?
00:10:44
Speaker
It was almost, you know what?
00:10:45
Speaker
There's a lot of actors who still to this day, they don't watch any of their material.
00:10:50
Speaker
They don't watch any of the TV shows, movies that they've done because it's
00:10:54
Speaker
They cringe when they see it.
00:10:55
Speaker
It's not a comfortable thing.
00:10:56
Speaker
Anybody who has an experience watching yourself on television, it's not an easy thing to do.
00:11:01
Speaker
I mean, it's cool, but you're always wondering, what are they going to show?
00:11:04
Speaker
Are they going to characterize me?
00:11:07
Speaker
Am I going to like it?
00:11:08
Speaker
Are people going to respond to it?
00:11:10
Speaker
Are they going to be offended by it?
00:11:12
Speaker
So the biggest thing for me was we're not seeing you.
00:11:15
Speaker
And it didn't bother me at first.
00:11:18
Speaker
You might see me, you know, keep watching.
00:11:19
Speaker
You're going to see more and more.
00:11:20
Speaker
I'm on there for a while.
00:11:21
Speaker
You know, I didn't want to give anything away, but I'm on there for a while.
00:11:24
Speaker
Time goes by.
00:11:25
Speaker
You still not see me, but somehow I'm still hanging around.
00:11:28
Speaker
But now that the question that, you know, what are we going to see more of you?
00:11:32
Speaker
You know, like, I don't even like the show.
00:11:33
Speaker
I want to see more of you.
00:11:35
Speaker
That's what I'm watching for, you know?
00:11:37
Speaker
Man, I remember having actually a quick moment with my father who, he don't watch any reality TV, but obviously he's watching TuneIn for me.
00:11:46
Speaker
He didn't care if he saw little bits of me or plenty of me.
00:11:50
Speaker
One way or another, it didn't bother him.
00:11:51
Speaker
He was just enjoying the experience too.
00:11:54
Speaker
But he said, you know, I
00:11:55
Speaker
I can't help but notice that we're not seeing a lot of you.
00:11:57
Speaker
And he was just checking me like, yeah, how does that make you feel?
00:12:00
Speaker
That was the first moment where I'm like, you know what?
00:12:02
Speaker
I wanted to tell my pops.
00:12:03
Speaker
Like, it is kind of getting annoying because so many people are asking me and they don't leave me alone about it.
00:12:08
Speaker
So...
00:12:09
Speaker
before I get on too much of a tangent to bring it back to paradise.
00:12:13
Speaker
Then they start asking me to go on paradise.
00:12:15
Speaker
Even a lot is following me like, we got to do this or what?
00:12:17
Speaker
I'm like, I don't know, because I can't even understand why you want me.
00:12:20
Speaker
You don't put me on the first.
00:12:21
Speaker
That's a great point, man.
00:12:23
Speaker
So, I mean, you start to feel a little bit like a seat filler.
00:12:26
Speaker
Like you're in there to take up space, but you're not really serving a purpose.
00:12:31
Speaker
So for me, I'm like, what's the point?
00:12:34
Speaker
It sounds great.
00:12:35
Speaker
Everybody always asks too.
00:12:36
Speaker
You're making a little bit of money.
00:12:38
Speaker
You're getting paid to have a good time, basically.
00:12:40
Speaker
You're sitting on the beach, getting a tan, meeting people.
00:12:44
Speaker
You're on a resort.
00:12:45
Speaker
It sounds great.
00:12:46
Speaker
But I'm almost a little bit paranoid now because I'm like,
00:12:49
Speaker
I'm not doing anything for your television show.
00:12:52
Speaker
So you get a little paranoid, like, well, you're just kind of using me now.
00:12:55
Speaker
But I trusted, again, shout out to Elan.
00:12:58
Speaker
I trusted Elan that he told me there would be a moment for me, which there was at the end of The Bachelorette, and that people are going to want to see more of you.
00:13:06
Speaker
And for people who don't know Elan Gale, you don't question his intelligence.
00:13:10
Speaker
He's a smart dude.
00:13:12
Speaker
I said, I'm going to ride with him no matter what.
00:13:13
Speaker
Creator of Fuckboy Island.
00:13:17
Speaker
Oh, man.
00:13:17
Speaker
And what's the new one?
00:13:18
Speaker
Yeah, it's a new one.
00:13:19
Speaker
If anyone watches that on reality TV, he's created that show.
00:13:22
Speaker
So he's one of the EPs, executive producers, if I'm not mistaken.
00:13:25
Speaker
And maybe you write it.
00:13:26
Speaker
I'm not sure.
00:13:26
Speaker
But he's got a lot to do with it.
00:13:28
Speaker
He's a genius.
00:13:30
Speaker
And he's a good dude.
00:13:31
Speaker
And he just told me, you know, basically, trust the process.
00:13:35
Speaker
Like athletes here, right?
00:13:37
Speaker
I mean, like anybody that does anything in entertainment hears from people who are, you know, trying to guide them.
00:13:43
Speaker
And I trusted him.
00:13:44
Speaker
You know what I mean?
00:13:44
Speaker
Not everybody do you trust, but I trusted a lot.
00:13:47
Speaker
And he said, just keep going with me.
00:13:48
Speaker
You know, let me let me bring you along.
00:13:50
Speaker
So I said, fine, let's do it.
00:13:51
Speaker
And I went out there and actually, I always go back to this.
00:13:56
Speaker
But you can't help but mention the fact that we were the year that almost ended the show, really.
00:14:00
Speaker
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
00:14:02
Speaker
That's when the scandal broke up, you know, and I had to go that season.
00:14:06
Speaker
I think it was season four, season five.
00:14:09
Speaker
Yeah, I believe five, yeah.
00:14:10
Speaker
I went the following year.
00:14:12
Speaker
But to go back off what you said on making that decision, it kind of feels like, or felt like to me when you were saying it, it was like telling your people to come to your ball game and then you're not getting in the game.
00:14:22
Speaker
Absolutely.
00:14:22
Speaker
Why am I going to tell you all to watch?
00:14:24
Speaker
I'm going to watch them more.
00:14:25
Speaker
Because it's like, no, absolutely.
00:14:26
Speaker
Because like, they're not putting me in the game, so why are you going to put on the jersey?
00:14:30
Speaker
You're not just satisfied with just having a position.
00:14:32
Speaker
You're grateful, but like, show me.
00:14:34
Speaker
Like, what are we doing?
00:14:35
Speaker
Put me in the mix.
00:14:36
Speaker
Right, right, right.
00:14:37
Speaker
And so...
00:14:39
Speaker
I want to preface that to people listening.
00:14:40
Speaker
There is a shadow side to The Bachelor.
00:14:43
Speaker
Oh, hell yeah.
00:14:44
Speaker
Just like reality television.
00:14:45
Speaker
Right.
00:14:46
Speaker
You know, there's moments where mentally, emotionally you are off because you're worried about how you're going to be viewed.
00:14:51
Speaker
For you, you went out there.
00:14:53
Speaker
Then that's when a scandal happened.
00:14:54
Speaker
All hell broke loose.
00:14:55
Speaker
I think y'all was in The Bachelor and Paradise.
00:14:58
Speaker
How did you grow through that?
00:15:00
Speaker
How was the experience for you altogether?
00:15:03
Speaker
I mean, if you want to know the truth, I was a little relieved.
00:15:06
Speaker
Really?
00:15:08
Speaker
Well, I mean... No, I'm saying really the place like, shit, tell me more.
00:15:11
Speaker
Really?
00:15:12
Speaker
I mean...
00:15:14
Speaker
you caught in that tornado, you know what I mean?
00:15:17
Speaker
Where like, you know, I come from a small place, so I didn't know a lot of people who did this before me.
00:15:22
Speaker
It's not like I could pick anybody's brain.
00:15:24
Speaker
Like, what do you go through?
00:15:25
Speaker
How was it?
00:15:26
Speaker
You know, like there's a couple of people now who have been on from a similar area to me and they reached out before they went, like almost a little bit scared.
00:15:34
Speaker
Like, what's this going to be like?
00:15:36
Speaker
I didn't really have that.
00:15:37
Speaker
So I was just going into it blindly.
00:15:40
Speaker
So I'm on this magic carpet ride, basically.
00:15:42
Speaker
When I got off the bachelor, I was like, okay, I'm going to go home.
00:15:45
Speaker
I'm going to chill.
00:15:46
Speaker
I'm going to collect myself and be with my family, be with the people that I love.
00:15:50
Speaker
And then hopefully I'm going to have another opportunity.
00:15:52
Speaker
But instead, I decided, like I said, you got to strike while the iron is hot.
00:15:57
Speaker
And people actually want you to do this.
00:15:59
Speaker
They're calling me now.
00:15:59
Speaker
They may not call me in a year.
00:16:01
Speaker
You never know.
00:16:02
Speaker
You never, never know.
00:16:03
Speaker
Hey, I mean, again, not to go off topic, but I don't even know if we're going to get a Paradise this year.
00:16:09
Speaker
Oh, yeah.
00:16:09
Speaker
You did say that a few weeks ago on a call.
00:16:12
Speaker
Yeah.
00:16:12
Speaker
And you think the ratings are low?
00:16:14
Speaker
Like, what's going on?
00:16:15
Speaker
Oh, it's just kind of watered out because it's like it's not the same as Chris Harrison has left.
00:16:21
Speaker
We brought that up.
00:16:22
Speaker
Yeah, I mean, we talked about a lot.
00:16:24
Speaker
He's no longer with him.
00:16:25
Speaker
But I mean, I think people were looking for a breath of fresh air.
00:16:28
Speaker
And strangely enough, it came with an older cast.
00:16:32
Speaker
I mean, people really gravitated towards the new show, towards the Golden Bachelors.
00:16:38
Speaker
People were loving that.
00:16:39
Speaker
So now they want, from what I understand, they want to produce more of that content.
00:16:43
Speaker
I think it was good for them because they reconnected with some of their audience that have been with them since day one.
00:16:49
Speaker
I mean, people that are in their late 50s and 60s and 70s, now all of a sudden they can connect more with people who are part of their peer group.
00:16:59
Speaker
So I think they've found, it seems like, that the rating skyrocketed.
00:17:03
Speaker
So then they said, you know, we got to go where the money is.
00:17:06
Speaker
Maybe Paradise is...
00:17:08
Speaker
This luster, I guess, in a way.
00:17:09
Speaker
I mean, even on the business side of TV, I always think about the perception side.
00:17:14
Speaker
You know, I didn't realize that the two hours in paradise that it's a game.
00:17:17
Speaker
It's really like, yeah, you got to be yourself in it, but it's all about chess and not checkered.
00:17:23
Speaker
Right?
00:17:23
Speaker
Hell yeah.
00:17:24
Speaker
There was so much stuff I've done on camera that never made it to the camera.
00:17:27
Speaker
Right, right.
00:17:28
Speaker
Oh, I mean.
00:17:29
Speaker
When I had said
Dating Challenges Post-Reality Show
00:17:30
Speaker
something all day and I was like, oh, I'm bilingual.
00:17:34
Speaker
I speak two languages.
00:17:35
Speaker
And they're like, what is that?
00:17:36
Speaker
Body language.
00:17:37
Speaker
You know, the girl laughing.
00:17:38
Speaker
You don't catch that.
00:17:40
Speaker
When I'm like, that's a woman on the beach.
00:17:43
Speaker
You don't catch that.
00:17:44
Speaker
You don't see it.
00:17:44
Speaker
You just being a villain, right?
00:17:46
Speaker
So I say all I have to say, at the end of the day, reality TV in any capacity- It's a business.
00:17:52
Speaker
Right?
00:17:52
Speaker
You don't sell tickets.
00:17:53
Speaker
You don't have a show.
00:17:54
Speaker
Right, right.
00:17:55
Speaker
But us, we were kind of new to it.
00:17:58
Speaker
We were kind of like the older cast, too, on our season, as far as the men.
00:18:01
Speaker
Ryan was the oldest at the time.
00:18:04
Speaker
And that's what it was.
00:18:06
Speaker
Fast forward, you do two shows.
00:18:09
Speaker
update the people on like after that you know you did some stuff in uh connecticut i'm pretty sure and then from my experience from what i know you did attract a relationship am i wrong yeah yeah honestly you know oh gee who probably was the first person if i can remember who had a real actual relationship post show outside of the show
00:18:36
Speaker
from someone that wasn't a part of the show.
00:18:38
Speaker
Right, right, right.
00:18:39
Speaker
And I can recall.
00:18:40
Speaker
Right.
00:18:40
Speaker
You know what I'm saying?
00:18:42
Speaker
I think I got into a relationship probably while Paradise was still on the air.
00:18:47
Speaker
You know what I mean?
00:18:47
Speaker
So... Spilling the tea.
00:18:50
Speaker
It's a double-edged sword.
00:18:51
Speaker
You go on the show with the intention of you want to meet somebody.
00:18:55
Speaker
I mean, I would say, especially with our cast, I thought we were a normal group of dudes who it hadn't worked out for.
00:19:04
Speaker
Who knows what reason?
00:19:06
Speaker
But now we were gearing ourselves towards, man, we're going to make a big enough commitment to trying to meet somebody.
00:19:11
Speaker
And we're going to do it in front of the world.
00:19:14
Speaker
So you go on there, you come off, people come to know you as somebody who's looking for somebody.
00:19:20
Speaker
So what I always thought was interesting was everybody's trying to set you up.
00:19:22
Speaker
I don't know if you had this experience.
00:19:24
Speaker
I mean, it's different for everybody, but I know that like where I'm from, right?
00:19:27
Speaker
The fact that I'm older, I'm single, is not all that common.
00:19:32
Speaker
Most people around here are linked up by now, very kids, whatever.
00:19:36
Speaker
So the instant reaction of the people who are watching the show, knowing that you were, man, he went on there because he wants to meet somebody.
00:19:43
Speaker
I mean, that's what people boil it down to.
00:19:45
Speaker
That's the premise.
00:19:46
Speaker
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
00:19:47
Speaker
Which was true.
00:19:48
Speaker
I mean...
00:19:49
Speaker
I was willing to take a leap of faith and hopefully it would work out.
00:19:52
Speaker
So in the long run, it did.
00:19:53
Speaker
I met somebody.
00:19:54
Speaker
But I remember at the time, like everybody's trying to hook you up.
00:19:58
Speaker
That was for me.
00:19:58
Speaker
Everybody's got somebody for you.
00:20:00
Speaker
And I think is that not only that everybody else is trying to hook you up, the people, the person you're meeting or trying to be with you is trying to hook themselves up with you.
00:20:10
Speaker
Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah.
00:20:10
Speaker
Because I always fought through, you know, or have a challenge with, is this person really for me or are they with me because no one really speaks to that.
00:20:20
Speaker
I've met people and I say, well, I don't care about that.
00:20:22
Speaker
It's like, yeah, but that's the only way you know me.
00:20:24
Speaker
Right, right.
00:20:25
Speaker
You don't care about it.
00:20:26
Speaker
Now, if I wasn't in that lane on that platform, would you feel the same about?
00:20:31
Speaker
But it's hard to say that.
00:20:33
Speaker
It's hard.
00:20:34
Speaker
You'll never really know.
00:20:35
Speaker
I don't know what that was, but when I saw you and your person you were dating at the time together, it seemed like you guys were happy, you were happy.
00:20:43
Speaker
Right, right.
00:20:44
Speaker
However, there's a thing that comes up when you're on a show, especially as a guy, and predominantly in the audience is women.
00:20:53
Speaker
Right.
00:20:53
Speaker
Followers are women.
00:20:54
Speaker
Right.
00:20:55
Speaker
Right.
00:20:55
Speaker
There's no denying them.
00:20:56
Speaker
If you can be with someone, I'm not sure for you, but I know some of my past relationships, I'm not saying that the women I was with were highly insecure, but that was a factor that it was always about another woman.
00:21:08
Speaker
Right.
00:21:08
Speaker
Right.
00:21:09
Speaker
I mean, I can only imagine what it would be like.
00:21:14
Speaker
I mean, even if the tables were turned, right?
00:21:15
Speaker
If you were a female that was on TV all the time and men were off, were looking at you like, this girl's single.
00:21:21
Speaker
she's open to meeting someone like the DMS fill up.
00:21:26
Speaker
People are making advances towards these women.
00:21:27
Speaker
Like they're pretty much.
00:21:30
Speaker
Wow.
00:21:30
Speaker
I mean, this girl's beautiful.
00:21:31
Speaker
I mean, yeah.
00:21:32
Speaker
I mean, I think I'm gonna make a move.
00:21:34
Speaker
I'm gonna make a move.
00:21:35
Speaker
Right.
00:21:36
Speaker
I always say, I think groupies,
00:21:38
Speaker
people who are considered groupies are smart.
00:21:41
Speaker
Why wouldn't you want to be with the best of that world or that lane that you're looking at, whether it's sports, entertainment?
00:21:47
Speaker
You can see the old digger, you can see this, but let's just keep it real.
00:21:51
Speaker
That's a great match to line up with, right?
00:21:54
Speaker
Yeah, hell yeah.
00:21:56
Speaker
He had blamed somebody for shooting a shot, but I mean, the fact of the matter is that
00:22:00
Speaker
You come off the show so you get categorized as somebody who's looking for somebody and then you have exposure.
00:22:07
Speaker
So you get introduced to people and you come in contact with people who you might otherwise never have met.
00:22:12
Speaker
So for me or you, being in that position, you're like, damn, I'm being exposed to a whole new world that I would have never have come across if it wasn't for the show.
00:22:22
Speaker
I'm going to try to navigate and see if there isn't somebody else, whether it be somebody that I meet from the show, which people have done, or somebody off the show.
00:22:31
Speaker
So again, you get back to kind of striking while the iron is hot.
00:22:34
Speaker
So yeah, I mean, it felt like it was a double-edged sword because you could meet people
00:22:40
Speaker
But then you add, again, you're navigating, you're trying to figure out what people that I'm actually being introduced to and that who are messaging me or whatever the case may be, which ones are really interested in me or they're interested in like what I got going on right now.
00:22:57
Speaker
So it's, you know, you got to use your judgment.
00:23:00
Speaker
as far as just getting a sense of people and who they are.
00:23:03
Speaker
Also, if you are lucky enough to hit it off somebody, that's a difficult experience for them to go through because you're popular at the time.
00:23:13
Speaker
So there's some...
00:23:15
Speaker
resistance there yeah yeah yeah it's not reality to them so they don't even understand it they don't know it you would nuke towards so I can only imagine you think it's a devil you think it's a youth it's not easy like you I mean it didn't really change me having been on television I was still gonna be the guy that I was I still had certain parameters that I was gonna you know lines that I was gonna live in between so like for me even though
00:23:43
Speaker
There might have been a bigger pool of people that I was sort of at that my options were at the time.
00:23:48
Speaker
Like I was not going to indulge.
00:23:50
Speaker
I just, it's not me.
00:23:51
Speaker
So like, if I'm with you, I'm with you.
00:23:53
Speaker
I'm not doing anything else.
00:23:54
Speaker
That's just who I am.
00:23:55
Speaker
You know what I mean?
00:23:55
Speaker
That's how I'm built.
00:23:57
Speaker
But on the other side of the coin, you can't help but think about it, especially, you know, as a woman, you got your antennas up a little bit.
00:24:03
Speaker
You're like, yeah, he's a good dude, but you know,
00:24:06
Speaker
How do I know that this doesn't really do more for him than he really lets on?
00:24:11
Speaker
You know what I mean?
00:24:12
Speaker
Maybe when he's out.
00:24:13
Speaker
And women don't trust women.
00:24:15
Speaker
They don't put anything past other females.
00:24:18
Speaker
So as prime and ready as you are for a relationship, because that's how this whole thing started.
00:24:25
Speaker
I went on a show to find a girl.
00:24:27
Speaker
There's still a lot of questions that are like, you know, it's new to you.
00:24:31
Speaker
So the relationship's new to you.
00:24:33
Speaker
The exposure's new to you.
00:24:34
Speaker
How are you going to deal with it?
00:24:36
Speaker
You know, are they going to be able to focus on me?
00:24:37
Speaker
Are they focused on everything else that comes with the show?
00:24:41
Speaker
So, and all the meanwhile, they're just wondering, am I going to be his first priority?
00:24:46
Speaker
You know, am I going to have to worry about him?
00:24:49
Speaker
So it just creates a lot of insecurity, a lot of anxiety.
00:24:52
Speaker
And even though you may seem like a prime candidate because you literally went on a dating show, everybody thinks that guy, it's what he wants, that he's going to follow through with that.
00:25:04
Speaker
He's going to make the most of that.
00:25:05
Speaker
There's that other stereotype that gets placed on us where it's like, nah, he's just going to soak it up.
00:25:12
Speaker
Nah, he's just going to go have a good time.
00:25:13
Speaker
And some of us didn't.
00:25:15
Speaker
Right.
00:25:16
Speaker
Oh, absolutely.
00:25:17
Speaker
Absolutely.
00:25:18
Speaker
But I always say, I tell all women, I say, listen, you can say what you want.
00:25:22
Speaker
You can say how you feel respectfully.
00:25:25
Speaker
But I don't think any woman, I could be lying.
00:25:27
Speaker
Women, please comment.
00:25:29
Speaker
DM me.
00:25:30
Speaker
Yeah.
00:25:31
Speaker
Wherever you hear, see this episode.
00:25:33
Speaker
No woman wants to be with a man who don't attract women.
00:25:38
Speaker
Right.
00:25:38
Speaker
Not the prize somewhat in their world.
00:25:40
Speaker
Maybe you want a guy that nobody wants.
00:25:42
Speaker
I don't think that's true.
00:25:44
Speaker
I doubt it.
00:25:45
Speaker
I think you caption the guy that every girl wants boosts your ego as a woman.
00:25:50
Speaker
So there's always this push-pull thing I think happens with some people.
00:25:55
Speaker
Without a doubt.
00:25:57
Speaker
Where there's a resistance, but you know, the truth is you don't want someone nobody wants.
00:26:03
Speaker
She wants a guy that's a catch.
00:26:04
Speaker
Use the catch.
00:26:05
Speaker
Matt Munson.
00:26:06
Speaker
Anybody that's trying to deny that is lying to you.
00:26:08
Speaker
Yeah.
00:26:09
Speaker
You know what I mean?
00:26:10
Speaker
That's maybe part of their decision when they got with you.
00:26:12
Speaker
It was like, yeah, but I don't care about that.
00:26:14
Speaker
No, no, you do care about it.
00:26:15
Speaker
Right, right.
00:26:16
Speaker
Because everywhere you go, someone's going to ask you about it.
00:26:18
Speaker
Yeah.
00:26:19
Speaker
By the way, if you're that.
00:26:21
Speaker
I think in the past, for me, it was like, when is this going to end?
00:26:24
Speaker
Enough is enough.
00:26:25
Speaker
Like, I don't want to be reminded that nobody wants to be reminded that that person is
00:26:29
Speaker
was on a dating show.
00:26:31
Speaker
All people want to do is ask that person, what was it like being on a dating show?
00:26:35
Speaker
Meanwhile, if you're dating someone, that person is sitting on the other side of you like, oh man, this shit's getting old.
00:26:42
Speaker
You know what I mean?
00:26:43
Speaker
Listen, I've dealt with that in public where it's like, I'm talking about to this day, you know, a fan of someone to come up and approach with,
00:26:50
Speaker
Bravery.
00:26:51
Speaker
The show is what?
00:26:53
Speaker
2007?
00:26:53
Speaker
Brazen, brazen bravery.
00:26:55
Speaker
Yeah.
00:26:56
Speaker
You play it off.
00:26:57
Speaker
Your pores are your professional.
00:26:59
Speaker
I don't have people follow me.
00:27:00
Speaker
It gets a little different.
00:27:01
Speaker
There are some fanatics out there, but I think some people just don't respect boundaries because when they see you on TV, they just feel like they know you.
00:27:08
Speaker
They know.
00:27:09
Speaker
Oh, absolutely.
00:27:10
Speaker
Yeah.
00:27:10
Speaker
Whenever you play, they feel like that's you.
00:27:13
Speaker
all together.
00:27:14
Speaker
And I just think you, no one was really get to meet the real you.
00:27:18
Speaker
I just want to give you your flowers because when I was on the show, a lot of people was coming to me for help, but I was able to go to you for help.
00:27:25
Speaker
You was there, bro.
00:27:26
Speaker
Like you looked out for me.
00:27:27
Speaker
You gave me some advice.
00:27:27
Speaker
You was like a real big brother, right?
00:27:29
Speaker
Appreciate that.
00:27:30
Speaker
You made me feel comfortable speaking on how I felt and not confuse myself.
00:27:37
Speaker
Because the show was trying to confuse me.
00:27:39
Speaker
Because I was really bong.
00:27:40
Speaker
I've never been in a relationship, never been in love.
00:27:42
Speaker
So I was coming in my character.
00:27:44
Speaker
And I'm like, this is about, you know, I don't sell off the golf cart.
00:27:49
Speaker
Let's talk about the basketball game.
00:27:53
Speaker
But yeah, you and I was in a basketball day.
00:27:55
Speaker
And by the way, Matt not only is a great brother and a great friend and he supported me in my tough moment, but he also can play basketball.
00:28:03
Speaker
Yeah, but you would never know.
00:28:05
Speaker
We had a basketball day and Matt was cooking.
00:28:09
Speaker
Let me tell you something.
00:28:10
Speaker
He was cooking up.
00:28:11
Speaker
He was like, Steph Curry out there.
00:28:13
Speaker
I'm like, tell him, hey.
00:28:14
Speaker
I said, man, what's going on?
00:28:15
Speaker
I said, brother, you got to stop.
00:28:17
Speaker
So, in like a little competitive moment, I'm going to be on this guy's team because just as an individual outside of the show, because he ain't showing no remorse.
00:28:25
Speaker
He was just like, hey, I'm bringing it.
00:28:28
Speaker
I think our relationship built and we built such an authentic connection.
00:28:32
Speaker
I'll say this.
00:28:33
Speaker
And then there was a term, people who watched The Bachelorette Season 13 with Rachel Lindsay, there's a term that goes, there she is.
00:28:42
Speaker
Right?
00:28:43
Speaker
Too bad, Martin.
00:28:43
Speaker
Yeah.
00:28:45
Speaker
Is the creator of that work.
00:28:47
Speaker
Then you go back and watch the 10th season, just be aware of where like, there she is.
00:28:53
Speaker
And so I'll let you go.
00:28:56
Speaker
I mean, I'll let you speak on what I just said, but if you can elaborate on where did the there she is come up and how did you get to that point on the show?
00:29:04
Speaker
Well, I thought it was twofold, actually, because I think we were, that was kind of Brian's like instant.
00:29:10
Speaker
She walked through the door, he pretty quickly was there she is.
00:29:13
Speaker
So then we started to imitate a little bit.
00:29:16
Speaker
It took out a life of its own.
00:29:18
Speaker
And to me, it was like, it was just a way to get into the moment of like, everything's got to turn up now.
00:29:24
Speaker
The smile's got to be bigger.
00:29:25
Speaker
I mean, we were all, listen, you're a bunch of dudes who see nothing but one another.
00:29:32
Speaker
for all day long, sitting and playing cards with each other.
00:29:35
Speaker
We're all by the pool.
00:29:36
Speaker
We're looking at each other.
00:29:37
Speaker
So when a woman enters the room, you're just like, thank God we need some female energy in this place.
00:29:46
Speaker
So it was just like a way to flip the light switch on that when we saw her come in, it was like,
00:29:52
Speaker
And it may have even extended beyond just Rachel.
00:29:55
Speaker
It might have went to other females when they came in, whether it be producers or
Memorable Moments and Future Participation in Reality TV
00:30:00
Speaker
whoever was coming into the room in the moment, we would just say, there she is.
00:30:05
Speaker
Because it was like, oh, man, now we can stop looking at each other.
00:30:08
Speaker
And there's a woman in the room now.
00:30:11
Speaker
There's 20, 25, 15, 12, 10, whatever, however it got whittled down.
00:30:17
Speaker
It's all dudes all the time.
00:30:18
Speaker
Yeah, awesome.
00:30:19
Speaker
So it was refreshing to see a woman.
00:30:21
Speaker
And I thought that was just like a way to lead into that.
00:30:24
Speaker
Like, there she is.
00:30:26
Speaker
Everybody looked in that direction and it changed the whole mood of the room, basically.
00:30:30
Speaker
And it was the thing.
00:30:31
Speaker
I even used that term outside of the show.
00:30:33
Speaker
There she is.
00:30:36
Speaker
It was a habit.
00:30:37
Speaker
It was almost a habit, right?
00:30:38
Speaker
Yeah, it was fun.
00:30:39
Speaker
And then I think those are moments I miss the most.
00:30:41
Speaker
You know, when we were drinking in, we were in Copenhagen, I think.
00:30:46
Speaker
When were we in Copenhagen?
00:30:46
Speaker
Yep.
00:30:47
Speaker
Yup.
00:30:48
Speaker
I was like, Shabby, get the wizard.
00:30:52
Speaker
There's video of that.
00:30:53
Speaker
There's video of that.
00:30:55
Speaker
I may or may not be.
00:30:57
Speaker
Nice.
00:30:57
Speaker
Never think you would be it.
00:31:02
Speaker
I think I might have tried to make it seem like I could dance for a minute.
00:31:05
Speaker
That's a classic video.
00:31:07
Speaker
That's out there.
00:31:08
Speaker
What people don't realize is, I think by now, so many people know a lot of the mechanics of the show, how it works, everything, but those were late nights.
00:31:16
Speaker
We were up 2, 3 in the morning.
00:31:17
Speaker
It was nothing.
00:31:18
Speaker
That was nothing for us to be up that late.
00:31:20
Speaker
Roll ceremonies.
00:31:21
Speaker
Man.
00:31:22
Speaker
A lot of tequila, a lot of champagne.
00:31:24
Speaker
Yeah.
00:31:25
Speaker
And you're running out of adrenaline.
00:31:27
Speaker
So there's excitement.
00:31:29
Speaker
There's a little bit of anxiety.
00:31:30
Speaker
So that was one of those moments when we were all just like winding down at the end of the night, enjoying each other's company.
00:31:37
Speaker
And to be like, you know, to your point,
00:31:39
Speaker
Some of the moments that we probably will never forget.
00:31:43
Speaker
And that, you know, the first thing you think about, man, the camaraderie, that downtime, that was pretty special.
00:31:49
Speaker
I mean, we're talking about, we're getting on now.
00:31:51
Speaker
It's all closer to a decade ago.
00:31:54
Speaker
And we still think back, you know, we look a little older now.
00:31:58
Speaker
And it's exciting and it's fun.
00:32:00
Speaker
I remember being on the 3-on-1 date.
00:32:02
Speaker
And I think you and Rachel had left and then you didn't come back.
00:32:07
Speaker
I was like, it kind of hit me.
00:32:09
Speaker
Like, we're mad.
00:32:11
Speaker
All they sit him in the van, he gone on.
00:32:13
Speaker
I'm like, what?
00:32:14
Speaker
So in my mind at those moments, I had to really think like, oh, it's getting real.
00:32:19
Speaker
Let's get close.
00:32:20
Speaker
There's no more fun time.
00:32:22
Speaker
Like, yeah.
00:32:23
Speaker
Closest friend, you and Adam, y'all are my closest friends on this show.
00:32:26
Speaker
Yeah, yeah.
00:32:27
Speaker
Oh, they cheap money, bitch, you know?
00:32:29
Speaker
He went home and then it was just like, damn, thank God me and Brian had a good time.
00:32:34
Speaker
We ended up at the end, but more importantly, man, what I love about the show and about you, I actually came to Connecticut, right?
00:32:40
Speaker
You did.
00:32:41
Speaker
We hung out.
00:32:43
Speaker
And we kept our bond and our relationship.
00:32:45
Speaker
And I think that's what's more important than me and anything.
00:32:48
Speaker
All of life, forget TV, take TV away, is the relationships I built and who you were and how you showed us to me when I wasn't even around.
00:32:56
Speaker
And I think, you know, this time around, like right now, I think it's your time to get back in the limelight, you know, maybe a podcast for you, maybe radio, maybe a new paradise is coming.
00:33:06
Speaker
You got Love is Blind.
00:33:07
Speaker
I mean, people ask you all the time, like, would you do it again?
00:33:10
Speaker
To me, I've said this before, whether it be on podcasts or just in person with people.
00:33:15
Speaker
And I'm like, I can't say absolutely fast enough.
00:33:19
Speaker
Because it's unmatched.
00:33:23
Speaker
You can't explain it.
00:33:24
Speaker
You can't duplicate it.
00:33:25
Speaker
You can't duplicate it.
00:33:27
Speaker
People are like, would you do it again?
00:33:29
Speaker
In other words, like, ah, do you have any regrets?
00:33:31
Speaker
Do you wish you might have not?
00:33:32
Speaker
I would do it tomorrow if they called me.
00:33:34
Speaker
Because you don't know what you're getting into.
00:33:37
Speaker
And that's a very general way to put it.
00:33:40
Speaker
Because you don't know if you're going to meet the love of your life.
00:33:43
Speaker
You don't know if you're going to get to travel.
00:33:44
Speaker
You don't know bonds like this.
00:33:46
Speaker
You don't know who you're going to meet.
00:33:48
Speaker
I mean,
00:33:49
Speaker
Why would you limit yourself if the opportunity came to me again?
00:33:53
Speaker
It'd be a no-brainer.
00:33:55
Speaker
The other part of it is, it's been some time.
00:33:57
Speaker
Because there have been a couple instances where COVID affected it and whatnot, but where I was almost going to go back on, and it was very close.
00:34:06
Speaker
Been through all the different background checks, all that pre-production stuff.
00:34:10
Speaker
Some things happened, but looking back, I'm like, you're so excited because you want to do it again.
00:34:14
Speaker
But at the same time, once you get in that world, in that setting again,
00:34:19
Speaker
and there's some time that's gone by, I mean, it's like, you hoped that it would be like riding a bike, but you don't really know.
00:34:25
Speaker
I mean, you get re-intirated.
00:34:27
Speaker
Be careful what you wish for.
00:34:28
Speaker
You get in front of a camera again, people start asking you questions at 3 o'clock in the morning, and you know, you've been drinking a little bit, and you just want to go to sleep, and
00:34:38
Speaker
People think it's just a joy ride.
00:34:40
Speaker
I mean, they're like a real frat.
00:34:42
Speaker
A little bit.
00:34:43
Speaker
A little bit.
00:34:44
Speaker
I would agree.
00:34:45
Speaker
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
00:34:45
Speaker
There's some parallels to it.
00:34:47
Speaker
I mean, you can't prepare for something you've never been on.
00:34:50
Speaker
So when we first went on, how can you prepare?
00:34:52
Speaker
No, I don't think no.
00:34:53
Speaker
Even when you go a second, third, fourth, you never can be prepared for what the moment's on a break.
00:34:58
Speaker
So you don't know what the moment's on a break.
00:34:59
Speaker
No.
00:35:00
Speaker
You couldn't anticipate that before going.
00:35:02
Speaker
Right.
00:35:03
Speaker
Right.
00:35:03
Speaker
Right.
00:35:04
Speaker
And then also, that's just actually shooting the show.
00:35:09
Speaker
Now the show is done, and now you've got to sit on it for a little while.
00:35:13
Speaker
I was pretty lucky.
00:35:14
Speaker
You didn't see a lot of me.
00:35:16
Speaker
But the upside to that is I didn't have many opportunities to get typecast as whatever.
00:35:22
Speaker
You know what I mean?
00:35:24
Speaker
Like you did by being the villain.
00:35:26
Speaker
You know what I mean?
00:35:27
Speaker
Like you go from being the good guy and then now you have some moments where people are questioning your motives and all that.
00:35:32
Speaker
You got to be ready for that too.
00:35:33
Speaker
So you be at peace with it.
00:35:36
Speaker
You know, you leave it in the past.
00:35:37
Speaker
I wasn't on TV a lot, but at least people, the little bit they did see me, they liked him.
00:35:42
Speaker
Now, okay.
00:35:44
Speaker
You know, you want to go down that slippery slope again.
00:35:46
Speaker
You want to do it again, but be prepared.
00:35:47
Speaker
It might not go as smooth as it did the first time.
00:35:50
Speaker
So now you might go on again and, you know, you might see yourself in the foot and now you come on TV and people aren't as happy with this version of you.
00:35:59
Speaker
You know what I mean?
00:35:59
Speaker
So now it's like, should I have well enough alone?
00:36:02
Speaker
Now I'm back in it again.
00:36:05
Speaker
Sort of the long story short is, you know, we got to try to live in the moment, be thankful for the experiences that we had, not be constantly sort of digressing.
00:36:16
Speaker
You know, the past is the past.
00:36:18
Speaker
It was great for so many reasons.
00:36:19
Speaker
And this is evidence right here, you and me talking.
00:36:21
Speaker
This would have never been.
00:36:22
Speaker
You've got to look at all the good things that came from it and make peace with it.
00:36:27
Speaker
And then just be open-minded because who knows?
00:36:29
Speaker
Opportunity might come again.
00:36:31
Speaker
You never know.
00:36:32
Speaker
And would I jump on it?
00:36:33
Speaker
Absolutely.
00:36:34
Speaker
All that being said and all the good, bad, happy said, two years after Pope's show, how has relationships in general with people, with, you know, date, like how has it been for you?
00:36:46
Speaker
Like post all of the hoopla.
00:36:48
Speaker
Now that we've been here, people don't understand the show is not real life.
00:36:52
Speaker
We have a real life.
00:36:53
Speaker
We're still people who have professions, who have to pay the bills and all these things.
00:36:58
Speaker
Sometimes it's a component to your life where you're like, okay, done that.
00:37:01
Speaker
But what do I really want?
00:37:03
Speaker
How do I go about it now that I'm this new person, entity, energy?
00:37:08
Speaker
And for you, being in Connecticut, a small town, getting all that vision, how was dating Polk Show after the first or second?
00:37:16
Speaker
I don't know how many relationships you had Polk Show.
00:37:18
Speaker
Right, right.
00:37:19
Speaker
Not as easy as people might think.
00:37:21
Speaker
I think, you know, sort of the stereotype is that
00:37:24
Speaker
I remember even you and I did some radio and I remember one of the things was this host that I, to this day, she's great, Gina J from a local radio station here in Connecticut.
00:37:36
Speaker
And she was just like, how are we supposed to believe that any of these guys had a difficult time dating?
00:37:42
Speaker
They got to go on a show.
00:37:43
Speaker
Really?
00:37:43
Speaker
Are we supposed to believe that they ever had any trouble meeting someone?
00:37:47
Speaker
But the fact of the matter is, for whatever reason, you're going on a show because it's not that easy for you.
00:37:53
Speaker
So, you know, you've got some hang-ups.
00:37:55
Speaker
You've got some commitment issues.
00:37:57
Speaker
You know what I mean?
00:37:57
Speaker
That's one thing that I, you know, I guess we've got to be honest about, too.
00:38:02
Speaker
Like, people are like, why hasn't this person met someone?
00:38:05
Speaker
Seems like everybody can meet somebody if they focus on it, they put their mind to it.
00:38:09
Speaker
And a lot of the drama and a lot of the entertaining aspects of the show that people connect with is like, this person looks good on paper, but in reality, they got some stuff.
00:38:20
Speaker
Yeah, I mean, my biggest thing was I was afraid to commit to you because I didn't want to be abandoned, right?
00:38:26
Speaker
My moment sign is a Sagittarius.
00:38:28
Speaker
People like their space and they want their freedom.
00:38:31
Speaker
They're optimistic.
00:38:32
Speaker
But I also know that.
00:38:34
Speaker
then that's the world.
00:38:36
Speaker
And here's the thing about being on a show, dating show.
00:38:39
Speaker
That's what I kind of realized over the years.
00:38:41
Speaker
People who are in relationships, yeah, they might be in love and they might be happy, but it's not even about that.
00:38:47
Speaker
I think most people, depending on how they were raised, I think most of it don't really know their real self, right?
00:38:52
Speaker
And you could be in a relationship and because I've done so much work,
00:38:57
Speaker
I've attracted people who didn't really know much of themselves.
00:39:01
Speaker
Right.
00:39:01
Speaker
So commitment is always there, but you can't just commit to anything because it's available.
00:39:07
Speaker
I think once you get the roots of who you are, which you know that person to find you, but it is hard date when you call on TV, it's not easy, you know?
00:39:15
Speaker
No, because I,
00:39:16
Speaker
People put you in a box where they assume that you went on TV, so you must just be, you know, living that life.
00:39:25
Speaker
They might think you're desperate for love.
00:39:28
Speaker
Like when you didn't win or when I didn't get what I did out of it,
00:39:32
Speaker
Everyone would try to hook me up.
00:39:34
Speaker
I'm just like, no, I'm good.
00:39:35
Speaker
Like, I'm cool right now.
00:39:36
Speaker
I got all need.
00:39:38
Speaker
And so I just think the biggest thing that I've learned over actually is, is that the show really healed me in ways I didn't know.
00:39:46
Speaker
Right.
00:39:47
Speaker
For you, what were some life lessons you learned from your experiences post-show, even on the show, that made you think about life differently when you was out on the road?
00:39:56
Speaker
Man, I mean, the further I get away from the show, it's a struggle for me because I look back and I go, man, there's a French saying, carpe diem, means seize the day.
00:40:08
Speaker
I feel like that was my quintessential moment where I said, you know what?
00:40:13
Speaker
I'm going to seize the day.
00:40:14
Speaker
I'm going to capitalize on this moment in time.
00:40:16
Speaker
I'm going to do something.
00:40:18
Speaker
that would scare a lot of people, I'm gonna go for it.
00:40:23
Speaker
And I think the further I get away from the show, like, I haven't been out there to visit you, you know what I mean?
00:40:27
Speaker
I haven't spent enough time traveling, doing things that, that was gonna set me up.
00:40:33
Speaker
That was gonna be my new approach.
00:40:34
Speaker
That was gonna be the new way that I live my life.
00:40:37
Speaker
You get a little bit, like, set in your ways too, especially as you get older.
00:40:41
Speaker
But I mean,
00:40:42
Speaker
What I learned from the show is, and what I always preach to people is, carpe diem, seize the moment.
00:40:48
Speaker
You have an opportunity, you got to take it.
00:40:50
Speaker
And I got to start practicing what I preach because what I think you do is that, you know, put yourself in a position or use your resources to try to create those opportunities for yourself.
00:41:03
Speaker
Like you've always tried to have been insisting upon me putting yourself out there
00:41:08
Speaker
Share your passions on Instagram.
00:41:09
Speaker
Like, do different things.
00:41:11
Speaker
Like, I go through phases where you see it.
00:41:12
Speaker
You see a little bit of what I'm about.
00:41:15
Speaker
And then I fall off for a while.
00:41:16
Speaker
And the fact of the matter is, people connect with that stuff.
00:41:20
Speaker
They want to learn who you are.
00:41:22
Speaker
And I think that sometimes I just kind of, like, get complacent.
00:41:26
Speaker
And... All that isn't true.
00:41:27
Speaker
But what I realized when I even came to Connecticut, and I think everybody listening that was going to watch this episode...
00:41:33
Speaker
Really take this in as a moment because I think it's very important and very vital for everyone to have more compassion and grace for themselves.
00:41:39
Speaker
What we got to understand
Seizing Opportunities and Life Reflections
00:41:40
Speaker
is that it's not that you couldn't post more, do more, be more.
00:41:45
Speaker
Well, the environment you were living in doesn't consist of that.
00:41:49
Speaker
Right.
00:41:49
Speaker
I live in L.A.
00:41:50
Speaker
So in L.A., this is this pencil town.
00:41:52
Speaker
It's about showing up, showing that auditioning.
00:41:56
Speaker
So the energy of the environment, when I came to Connecticut, I was like, oh, I can see I'm at cannot be so motivated at times.
00:42:03
Speaker
Right, right, right.
00:42:04
Speaker
I did motivating all the time.
00:42:05
Speaker
Then it gets cold.
00:42:06
Speaker
It's hot out here.
00:42:07
Speaker
Plus, I get it.
00:42:09
Speaker
I'm not saying, but if you're also what I'm saying is if you're not around it, if you don't got four or five guys that's wanting to, it's so hard to push yourself if no one else is pushing in that way.
00:42:20
Speaker
You know, everyone has jobs, they have family, they have kids.
00:42:22
Speaker
They're really locked into that world.
00:42:26
Speaker
And you're probably like the only one who's not, only thing you really had to do is move out of there and come to LA or New York.
00:42:33
Speaker
Right, right, right.
00:42:34
Speaker
I love so much about where I'm from.
00:42:36
Speaker
It's a big part of who I am.
00:42:37
Speaker
But yeah, it would have benefited, which I told somebody just last week when I meet people, I'm like, if you have the opportunity to go like you did, go.
00:42:44
Speaker
Because I'm speaking a little bit out of regret.
00:42:47
Speaker
I got a lot of life to live, so I can still do that.
00:42:51
Speaker
I can still try something new.
00:42:52
Speaker
But when I meet somebody who's below the age of 30, I'm like, you're thinking about it and you're considering it.
00:42:58
Speaker
You have the opportunity.
00:42:59
Speaker
The path is there for you to just, you know what I mean?
00:43:03
Speaker
You got to go.
00:43:03
Speaker
You could do it.
00:43:04
Speaker
You could do it for, I sound like people who were talking to me four or five years ago, but the energy is taking you there.
00:43:11
Speaker
You know what I mean?
00:43:11
Speaker
Somebody's tapping you on the shoulder and say, you got to go.
00:43:14
Speaker
All the particulars are in place for it to make sense.
00:43:16
Speaker
All you got to do is push yourself.
00:43:19
Speaker
All you got to do is take a leap of faith.
00:43:21
Speaker
You got to go do it.
00:43:22
Speaker
You might do it for a year and decide it's not for you.
00:43:24
Speaker
And then you might end up back in the same place you were, but at least you did it.
00:43:28
Speaker
Interesting story.
00:43:30
Speaker
The guy who I worked with,
00:43:33
Speaker
for almost 10 years, who put my name in for the show, actually.
00:43:38
Speaker
Oh, see?
00:43:39
Speaker
Yeah, yeah.
00:43:40
Speaker
He lived in Connecticut his whole life, same area as me.
00:43:43
Speaker
And a great guy, good friend of mine, met someone, and she moved for work to the Carolinas, actually.
00:43:52
Speaker
And I think they moved to Charlotte, matter of fact.
00:43:55
Speaker
Anyway,
00:43:56
Speaker
This person got up and he went.
00:43:58
Speaker
And I mean, he was a creature of habit and he was someone who never left Connecticut and he did it later in life.
00:44:03
Speaker
So it's never too late.
00:44:05
Speaker
I mean, you never know again when the opportunity is going to present itself.
00:44:09
Speaker
You got to be willing to jump on it.
00:44:10
Speaker
You got to be willing to capitalize on that opportunity.
00:44:13
Speaker
He did it.
00:44:13
Speaker
He loves it.
00:44:14
Speaker
His thing now is, you know, he doesn't know if that's his home or if this is still his home, but he's happy.
00:44:20
Speaker
He feels better about himself that he took a chance.
00:44:23
Speaker
And I think there's a lot to be said for it.
00:44:25
Speaker
But when I meet younger people, I'm like, man, what I wouldn't give to be 10 years younger and have that opportunity, I would have just went.
00:44:32
Speaker
We all make decisions, you know, but we got to go for it.
00:44:35
Speaker
I mean, and I'm not ruling it out at this point.
00:44:38
Speaker
But here's the thing.
00:44:39
Speaker
What's what I realized?
00:44:40
Speaker
The reason you got to go for because the opportunity is going for you.
00:44:44
Speaker
If you get the opportunity, that means it's going for you, so you have to go for it.
00:44:48
Speaker
It's coming.
00:44:49
Speaker
You've got to meet it halfway.
00:44:51
Speaker
It's like someone's pursuing you in a relationship.
00:44:53
Speaker
You've got to listen to the universe.
00:44:55
Speaker
Yeah, listen to it, right?
00:44:57
Speaker
And I always say, if you don't take a chance, you can't event.
00:44:59
Speaker
You've got to take a chance.
00:45:00
Speaker
Right.
00:45:01
Speaker
I love that.
00:45:03
Speaker
We get older.
00:45:04
Speaker
All we're going to have is lived experience on what we did do or what we didn't.
00:45:08
Speaker
We believe in this moment.
00:45:09
Speaker
We're going to have to remember this moment.
00:45:12
Speaker
I believe you're going to have a shot to get back on TV, be more visible, whether you're going to be commentating for the UConn Husky shots out of the UConn, right?
00:45:20
Speaker
Back-to-back chance.
00:45:21
Speaker
I don't know.
00:45:23
Speaker
Nobody does that, but we did it.
00:45:24
Speaker
Yeah, you go.
00:45:25
Speaker
See what I'm saying?
00:45:26
Speaker
UConn radio station.
00:45:27
Speaker
Oh, you're back on one of these ABC shows of Icon.
00:45:30
Speaker
I just feel like...
00:45:32
Speaker
genuinely good people and people who are like, because I feel like your thing to go on TV to be visible is really not for you.
00:45:40
Speaker
It's about something inside of you that must be healed so you can really move to that part of you that you know you are.
00:45:47
Speaker
You hit the nail on the head because like the energy is still in you.
00:45:51
Speaker
It's like it's like the universe is like when I'm ready, I'm gonna give you this.
00:45:55
Speaker
But you got to say yes.
00:45:56
Speaker
Like, I feel like you know how you got something in you or some people listen.
00:46:01
Speaker
I'm pretty sure some people are married, been married 15, 20, maybe 10 years.
00:46:05
Speaker
And you probably still think about your ex in high school that you can't let go.
00:46:09
Speaker
Because you know it's not done.
00:46:11
Speaker
You know it's not done.
00:46:13
Speaker
It's deep.
00:46:14
Speaker
And so I feel like when those things are in your spirit and in your soul like that, and you can't shake it or erase it, that means it's not finished with you.
00:46:22
Speaker
Some part of it to be actualized in this time.
00:46:26
Speaker
Yeah.
00:46:26
Speaker
I mean, not to go down that rabbit hole too far, but like with people to, you know, compare that metaphor that you're talking about.
00:46:34
Speaker
Somebody that they were so in love with someone,
00:46:39
Speaker
But for whatever reason, timing was right person, wrong time.
00:46:44
Speaker
But now society has brought you and someone else together and it all makes sense for you to move forward.
00:46:51
Speaker
I mean, real life mirrors that a little bit too, right?
00:46:54
Speaker
People are like, well...
00:46:55
Speaker
You would go do that again?
00:46:56
Speaker
Aren't you more interested in settling down and doing all these things now that you're a little bit older?
00:47:02
Speaker
Listen, I'm not opposed to either or.
00:47:04
Speaker
If I meet the right person tomorrow and I fall in love, then we're going to get to it.
00:47:10
Speaker
I mean, I would love to be in a relationship.
00:47:12
Speaker
Sometimes you almost have to take a side road to get to your destination.
00:47:17
Speaker
I mean, I take a detour.
00:47:20
Speaker
Yeah, yeah.
00:47:20
Speaker
I mean, people probably think it's bullshit, but I still believe that
00:47:25
Speaker
And we talked about it before.
00:47:27
Speaker
Adam is married.
00:47:29
Speaker
Dean is married.
00:47:30
Speaker
People that you didn't necessarily see it for.
00:47:33
Speaker
I mean, they were young.
00:47:33
Speaker
We were older.
00:47:34
Speaker
They were still in their mid-20s at the time.
00:47:38
Speaker
You never know the power of the given circumstances in that moment in time.
00:47:44
Speaker
Didn't happen for them right away.
00:47:45
Speaker
They met their person not long after.
00:47:47
Speaker
But I don't knock the credibility and the possibility that people laugh at it.
00:47:51
Speaker
You know, you're going to go on TV and meet someone.
00:47:53
Speaker
Come on, let's get real.
00:47:54
Speaker
This is your environment.
00:47:55
Speaker
Meet somebody.
00:47:56
Speaker
It's not hard to do.
00:47:57
Speaker
Get on an app.
00:47:58
Speaker
Do something.
00:47:58
Speaker
Get out there.
00:47:59
Speaker
Listen, I'm not on apps right now.
00:48:02
Speaker
But for me, I don't judge anybody who's been on an app.
00:48:05
Speaker
You should create an app.
00:48:06
Speaker
Oh, man, you never know.
00:48:07
Speaker
You never know.
00:48:08
Speaker
We could come up with one together.
00:48:09
Speaker
No, but I mean, I could never knock someone from being on an app because they look at me and say, you went on a show.
00:48:15
Speaker
Who are you to tell me?
00:48:16
Speaker
So, you know, what I would say is there is no blueprint for how you are going to find your happiness to meet your person.
00:48:25
Speaker
So I don't knock the possibility that get back on television and that just might be that you take to get to where you're supposed to be.
00:48:34
Speaker
Bigger Talks.
00:48:35
Speaker
Oh, wow.
00:48:36
Speaker
All because I went on TV.
00:48:37
Speaker
I got this podcast from Podcast One four or five years ago.
00:48:42
Speaker
There was so on I met who I was doing an interview on their show.
00:48:46
Speaker
She got me the deal.
00:48:48
Speaker
I remember that.
00:48:49
Speaker
Yeah.
00:48:49
Speaker
You never know.
00:48:51
Speaker
Why things show up in your vibration, why things show up in your life.
00:48:54
Speaker
It's up to you, us, we, everyone listening to go forward, to take the chance so you can event and don't have fear, have faith and just trust.
00:49:03
Speaker
Because if it's in your face and you can see it and touch it, I mean, are you wants to do it or should do it?
00:49:10
Speaker
Right.
00:49:10
Speaker
Because how many times my cousin was telling me this, he said, you got to think about too many people get the opportunity to go on TV.
00:49:17
Speaker
So if you're going on TV, it's reason.
00:49:20
Speaker
And it's bigger than what you can understand.
00:49:21
Speaker
Because you know how many people in the world that have been skid, it's like sperm, right?
00:49:27
Speaker
Right, right.
00:49:27
Speaker
Right.
00:49:29
Speaker
So I look at things like that.
00:49:31
Speaker
True.
00:49:32
Speaker
The advantage or an advantage.
00:49:34
Speaker
But if you look at it from living in L.A., you meet a lot of women who get the bad trip that they hit them up.
00:49:40
Speaker
And I don't want to be cast.
00:49:41
Speaker
The singer said, are you missing the whole point?
00:49:44
Speaker
You're never going to get where you want to go because you're trying to control it in a way that you don't even know they're going to see you.
00:49:50
Speaker
Grocery store Joe went home first day and he got married.
00:49:54
Speaker
Unbelievable.
00:49:55
Speaker
I forgot Joe.
00:49:55
Speaker
He's another one.
00:49:56
Speaker
Yeah, he's married too.
00:49:58
Speaker
He lasted one day and he blew up.
00:50:00
Speaker
Right, right, right.
00:50:01
Speaker
Changed his whole life.
00:50:02
Speaker
Yeah.
00:50:03
Speaker
Changed his whole life.
00:50:04
Speaker
It's like, honestly, reality TV is like real life.
00:50:07
Speaker
You're not in control of any of it.
00:50:09
Speaker
Nah, no.
00:50:10
Speaker
The sooner you realize that, the better off you'll be.
00:50:14
Speaker
Because people drive themselves, and I'm not even exaggerating, people drive themselves crazy trying to live within these certain confines.
00:50:24
Speaker
Everybody else needs to view them a certain way.
00:50:27
Speaker
And if they fall short of certain, these parameters,
00:50:31
Speaker
And there's certain criteria, expectations that other people have for them.
00:50:36
Speaker
They are so worried that I'm going to fall short of the way people view me.
00:50:40
Speaker
And then what is it going to look like?
00:50:41
Speaker
Am I a failure?
00:50:42
Speaker
And they make themselves sick.
00:50:44
Speaker
It's like, you got to be willing to color outside the lines.
00:50:48
Speaker
I mean, yeah.
00:50:49
Speaker
And I think that was the biggest moment in my life that changed my life.
00:50:52
Speaker
The moment I spazzed, you know, I came, I brought everyone in the room and I was just like, keep my name out your mouth.
00:50:58
Speaker
I've never done that ever in life, but that was the biggest moment of my life to change my life because that's how I felt.
00:51:05
Speaker
But I felt so bad after that, right?
00:51:08
Speaker
And actually was the best thing that I ever did for myself, was take up for myself in that moment.
00:51:13
Speaker
And it took me to a whole not with trajectory instead of me just playing small and playing fear.
00:51:18
Speaker
It'll never happen.
00:51:19
Speaker
So I just think to your point and everything you said, like go for it, live your life and shit.
00:51:25
Speaker
Let's be honest.
00:51:25
Speaker
Speak your truth.
00:51:26
Speaker
Yeah.
00:51:27
Speaker
Speak your truth.
00:51:28
Speaker
You should have regrets at some point in life.
00:51:30
Speaker
You should have, I don't know, doubt, fear, because that's real.
00:51:34
Speaker
Like if we all had sunlight all day, we wouldn't appreciate it.
00:51:38
Speaker
We need the contrast.
00:51:39
Speaker
If you're a perfect person, nobody wants a perfect spouse.
00:51:42
Speaker
I know I've never heard.
00:51:43
Speaker
You know, you want somebody real.
00:51:44
Speaker
You want somebody raw.
00:51:46
Speaker
Tell me how you really feel.
00:51:47
Speaker
Not what you think I want to hear.
00:51:49
Speaker
Because then I'm not going to get the real you and you're not going to get the real me.
00:51:52
Speaker
As much as you could be.
00:51:53
Speaker
And I think, like I said, opportunity will be knocking on your door soon.
00:51:56
Speaker
So we're manifesting now.
00:51:58
Speaker
And it's a miracle season for Matt.
00:52:00
Speaker
And, you know, I'm just happy to have you on this podcast, man, and speak your truth.
00:52:05
Speaker
It's so good to catch up.
00:52:07
Speaker
And I got to come to Connecticut this summer.
00:52:09
Speaker
Hopefully you'll be in L.A.
00:52:11
Speaker
But can you lead the people with some words of encouragement, some motivation or some positivity that they can kind of sleep on, integrate, embody for their lives?
00:52:20
Speaker
Yeah, I mean, when you break it all down, that's why you're giving us the content you do, right?
00:52:26
Speaker
That's what you're all about.
00:52:27
Speaker
And I would say there are two things.
00:52:31
Speaker
I would say there's nothing more important than routine.
00:52:33
Speaker
We take care of ourselves.
00:52:36
Speaker
I've had people, you look good, like, what do you do?
00:52:39
Speaker
Some people are like, you know, soon, like, oh, you must take stuff.
00:52:42
Speaker
I'm like, it's consistency.
00:52:43
Speaker
I show up every day.
00:52:45
Speaker
I can't get enough of being in the gym.
00:52:48
Speaker
I've been doing it my whole life.
00:52:50
Speaker
And I would say there's nothing more important than being consistent
00:52:54
Speaker
And if you have a goal, set it in front of you and chase it relentlessly.
00:53:00
Speaker
Routine is important, but at the same time, it's as important as routine is, like we were just talking about.
00:53:05
Speaker
Sometimes you have to break out of your routine.
00:53:07
Speaker
Sometimes you need to throw caution to the wind and you need to try something new.
00:53:11
Speaker
And again, I'm telling people this because I need to practice it as much as I preach it.
00:53:15
Speaker
Routine is great.
00:53:16
Speaker
Consistency is terrific.
00:53:18
Speaker
But sometimes you need to actually throw all that aside and say, I'm going to try this.
00:53:24
Speaker
I'm going to try it.
00:53:26
Speaker
Listen, I used to write a lot when I was younger.
00:53:28
Speaker
Found myself writing more lately, just putting pen to pen.
00:53:31
Speaker
And I get reminded that I'm good at putting mores on paper, you know?
00:53:36
Speaker
I've thought about it, you know, just in this past week.
00:53:38
Speaker
I mean, you can't limit yourself and you have to be willing to live outside of the box that people want to put you in because people think, well, this is the way life needs to be lived.
00:53:49
Speaker
And if you're not doing it that way, then it doesn't make much sense.
00:53:52
Speaker
Don't be afraid to just kind of laugh in the face of conventional wisdom sometimes and try something totally different that you have a passion for, but you're not necessarily willing to tell the world about it.
00:54:03
Speaker
that could be the other half of your whole.
00:54:05
Speaker
I mean, that could be what completes you, so to speak.
00:54:06
Speaker
You know what I mean?
00:54:07
Speaker
It could be the part of you that you're missing.
00:54:08
Speaker
You just, it's not tapped into.
00:54:11
Speaker
You haven't messed around with it at all.
00:54:13
Speaker
So you don't even know and you might even be suppressing it, but it could be a big part of who you are.
00:54:16
Speaker
It might be what people are willing to see because I know all the time that
00:54:21
Speaker
You know, that question never gets old that people want to ask you, so what's going on with you?
00:54:24
Speaker
What have you been doing lately?
00:54:25
Speaker
You know, and what better to tell somebody than, you know, actually, I've been traveling.
00:54:33
Speaker
I'm going to move to such and such a place.
00:54:36
Speaker
I'm working on a book.
00:54:38
Speaker
I'm starting to hike more, whatever the case may be.
00:54:41
Speaker
But as you know, so long as you just, you know, you don't tap into some of those unusual things that, you know, might be like, yeah, that sounds cool, but I don't really, what am I going to do that?
00:54:51
Speaker
That doesn't get me anywhere.
00:54:53
Speaker
You never know the confidence that comes along with it.
00:54:55
Speaker
Try something new.
00:54:56
Speaker
You might be an expert at the stuff you suppress, right?
00:54:58
Speaker
Right, right.
00:55:00
Speaker
Shadow side.
00:55:01
Speaker
Being more authentic, being more truthful, telling people how you really feel, what they want to hear.
00:55:05
Speaker
It's just really just being your complete self.
00:55:08
Speaker
I always tell people, do something different so you can be different.
00:55:11
Speaker
If we all do the same thing, how can we expect change that?
00:55:15
Speaker
Nah, it'll never happen.
00:55:16
Speaker
This is something that for everybody, even myself, like, so I tell you, I'm traveling more this year because I'm feeling called to.
00:55:23
Speaker
That's what I'm going to do.
00:55:24
Speaker
And I'm pretty sure me traveling is going to open up more portals within myself to help more people.
00:55:29
Speaker
Let them know you were telling me what are some of the places you got on tap that you're looking forward to going to.
00:55:34
Speaker
Well, Peru and being in Toronto, got to get the answer down at some point.
00:55:39
Speaker
And I still haven't been to London or Paris, but right now I got Peru on a schedule in Toronto.
00:55:44
Speaker
I've been in Toronto before.
00:55:46
Speaker
But really just traveling outside of my...
00:55:49
Speaker
my mind frame of what I know and think, right?
00:55:51
Speaker
Sometimes, you know, after traveling locally, you can travel mentally.
00:55:54
Speaker
Like, let me go into a different type of, like for me, I'm growing spiritually.
00:55:58
Speaker
I'm going to experiment plant medicine, right?
00:56:00
Speaker
All these things that's different to my norm is like you just spoke to.
00:56:03
Speaker
I just think when we as people can tap and color outside the line, I like that.
00:56:08
Speaker
Our coloring book would be more colorful because now that's complete.
00:56:11
Speaker
I'm just thankful for life.
00:56:12
Speaker
I'm thankful for this episode and it just,
00:56:15
Speaker
Everything we were able to share today and just, by the way, how can we connect with you?
00:56:20
Speaker
Where can we follow you?
00:56:21
Speaker
Can you give the listeners, the audience, your handles, Instagram, email?
00:56:27
Speaker
I'm at Matt underscore Munson underscore.
00:56:30
Speaker
I'm going to get back on there.
00:56:31
Speaker
Hopefully it was some of this content right here.
00:56:34
Speaker
Well, yeah, man.
00:56:35
Speaker
So like I said, thanks again to everyone's listening.
00:56:38
Speaker
Share this episode.
00:56:39
Speaker
I know Matt Munson, y'all know I'm from season 13 by Rachel Lindsay season.
00:56:44
Speaker
It's a miracle season.
00:56:46
Speaker
I want to say, give a big shout out to Simplified Impact.
00:56:48
Speaker
It does all my marketing for my YouTube and my podcast.
00:56:53
Speaker
So their link could be in a bio as well.
00:56:56
Speaker
If you want to check them out and don't forget to get you some miracle season merch.
00:57:00
Speaker
You need it.
00:57:01
Speaker
You need that swag.
00:57:03
Speaker
I always tell people, a lot of people want that miracle, but they don't want the season that comes with it.
00:57:07
Speaker
So just embrace all your seasons to get that miracle.
00:57:10
Speaker
And let them know too, because you always talk about manifestation.
00:57:13
Speaker
So if you wear it on your chest, you got it on your hat.
00:57:16
Speaker
If you're wearing it on your head, you're bringing that energy into your life, right?
00:57:20
Speaker
Miracle energy into the fruition.
00:57:22
Speaker
So that's all.
00:57:23
Speaker
That's it.
00:57:23
Speaker
Subscribe, share, like.
00:57:25
Speaker
We're done.
00:57:25
Speaker
Thank you for having me, bro.
00:57:26
Speaker
I appreciate it.
00:57:27
Speaker
I had a great time.
00:57:28
Speaker
We'll do it again sometime.
00:57:31
Speaker
Thank you for tuning in to another episode of Bigger Talks with Eric Bigger.
00:57:35
Speaker
If you enjoyed today's conversation and found it insightful, please consider sharing this episode with a friend, a co-worker, or someone who can benefit from these insightful discussions.
00:57:45
Speaker
Your support helps us reach more listeners as we continue to foster meaningful dialogues about the diverse subcultures of American life.
00:57:53
Speaker
I'm Eric Bigger, reminding you that every conversation has the power to broaden perspectives and foster connection.
00:57:59
Speaker
Until next time, keep embracing the unexpected on Bigger Talks.