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Reasons Not to Take Life So Seriously [ARCHIVE]
373 Plays10 months ago
It is very easy to get caught up in events that make up our lives and almost forget that most of the difficulties we are faced with are only as stressful as we make them be.
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Transcript
Introduction and FedEx Offer
00:00:00
Speaker
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00:00:23
Speaker
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Solo Episode Excitement and Listener Engagement
00:00:57
Speaker
Hi guys, so welcome back to the show. I am so so excited for this episode. It's just because I miss you guys so much. Like this is a solo episode, so I just haven't done a solo episode for quite a bit. So I'm just so excited to be talking with you guys on 101. So it's always a good one.
00:01:18
Speaker
Before we get started, I just want to remind everyone, if you haven't subscribed to the show already, make sure to subscribe on Apple Podcasts or Spotify or wherever you're listening to. There has been a lot of you guys also listening to this on Pandora, iHeartRadio, and also Radio Public. So if you're in any of those platforms, you can subscribe to our show on there as well.
00:01:44
Speaker
Yeah, and also leave us a review on Apple podcast if you like it or if you don't like it, but give us any feedback. So I'm happy to change that as well. So I'm always looking for feedback.
00:01:56
Speaker
Okay, so a little bit about like what's going on this week with me then we can get to today's topic.
Challenges of Insurance Shopping and Expiration
00:02:02
Speaker
So this week, here's the thing. So my insurance recently expired, like I think it's expired in January. This happens to a lot of people once you're like turning 25 or when you're turning like over 25.
00:02:17
Speaker
And this just happens, you know, because your insurance doesn't cover anymore. In my case, it's just like, you know, I was at school and everything and I had insurance because due to school, then because I graduated and everything. So it's kind of like it expired right after that, like a little a year after that. So that was kind of tied to school.
00:02:39
Speaker
That's literally what I'm up to right now, like insurance shopping. It's not the most fun thing I would add to that. So whoever listening to this, if you're still at the age, under the age of 25 and you're still with your family or just tied to your school, stick with that. Because once you're shopping for yourself, it sucks. I'm serious. Like it really sucks. First of all, like insurance is so expensive, like seriously expensive.
00:03:08
Speaker
uh especially like the good one like there are so many of them like that just like doesn't cover so many things and you would have to pay so much out of pocket and they're deductible or so low so like they're good ones that cost almost like $300 a month and i feel like that just seems kind of insane for an insurance because i feel like if i'm paying for that much for insurance and i don't think that i would be going to a doctor every month
00:03:33
Speaker
Like, for checkups, yes. For, like, maybe tests and everything once in a while. Like, I mean, every three or four months or six months for entire routine checkup. But, like, it's not gonna happen all the time. So, why would I be paying $300 or anything? There's also something else I learned, so I'll share with you guys. It's not sponsored or anything, just sharing. I think there's a website for each state, actually, you can go. I think it's called healthcare.gov. And once you put your information there,
00:04:01
Speaker
Like for each state, you can direct to the state's information, but you can go there first. And if you put your information there, you can actually might be qualified for a tax credit or just credit. I think it's kind of like works like a tax credit. So credit based on your income and stuff.
00:04:18
Speaker
So it can give you some credit to qualify for, you know, discount on your insurance, like whatever you're paying for insurance, it can deduct it by certain amounts. So it could be pretty affordable. My sister told me about that, actually. So that sounds pretty decent to me. So I might actually try that and let you guys know how that is because
00:04:39
Speaker
I mean that sounds pretty decent like I feel like everyone might need
Frustration with Medical Bills and Healthcare System
00:04:43
Speaker
that. Like one thing I would have to say is like insurance is just so crazy in here like well in this country like I'm not saying like that uh it's just so expensive and everything because I know even for my dad like because he has like Medicare but on top of that we also got him like a supplement insurance because that insurance actually doesn't cover uh a lot and other things like
00:05:05
Speaker
prescription or anything you have to get like a prescription d-plan and stuff like that i just seriously feel like this uh medical field is so corrupt like i'm not really really trying to like shit on like nurses or doctors i'm really just trying to talk about the companies because literally you would go i think i even mentioned this somewhere on tick doctor you guys can check it out
00:05:26
Speaker
There's so many videos other people made it to. It's like you would literally go to the one hospital or just one checkup. You will literally receive like bills from four or five different places. And that's just confused the hell out of me. Like who am I supposed to pay? Like why is this so confusing? This is there's a recent one that I probably might have to pay out of pocket because my insurance just expired.
00:05:47
Speaker
Like I had like a checkup like test on on in January and I received a bill Like one of them says this another bill is just as tax benefits. So I'm confused like do I have to pay? That's just so confusing because this is it's not a bill and one of them says there's like bill that I have to pay and like the Request my new in for insurance information so they can charge that insurance. So I'm just generally confused like
00:06:13
Speaker
like so first one I get like I have to provide new information but second one is like it's not a bill but it's tax benefits whatever so like and then it's just like it's just patience responsibility so like what am I supposed to do I'm like so confused what am I supposed to do it just again makes no sense no sense I'm really not trying to rant over here but just wanted to put this out there so whoever's shopping for insurance good luck
Philosophy of Not Taking Life Too Seriously
00:06:42
Speaker
So today I want us to talk about how to not take life seriously. Because I think in a way we have to think that like life has its own sense of humor as well. There is this saying by Albert Hubbard, don't take life too seriously. You will never get out of it alive.
00:07:03
Speaker
That's what we need to think about sometimes. I think a lot of the times we think about smallest things in our lives, like very, very small things. And we tend to just worry about like, I don't know, like interactions with people or just daily things that's happening in our lives, or I don't know, impressions that we are making on others.
00:07:25
Speaker
Or sometimes just like simple, very, very simple things that we say to ourselves or someone said to us through a text message, or through something, I don't know, like a daily interaction again, or someone we barely know, but you just took that as an offense, or you just took that. I don't know, like, I'm just saying like very random things.
00:07:48
Speaker
like that sometimes happens just because we are you know human and we tend to take a lot of things too seriously especially not everyone else but ourselves a lot and that just makes us like very scared like and like kind of scared and like hurt almost all the time life is already serious enough
00:08:10
Speaker
So I feel like we cannot take life seriously either because life is already too serious. We cannot take it seriously. It's already serious enough. So we just have to think about why this is causing that, what is happening. I think what we see it as, and I can also say this from my own experience, is that
00:08:29
Speaker
sometimes we see certain things that's happening in our lives as like an evidence or proof that like we are not capable of certain things or we don't have values in certain way or we don't have ethics in certain ways and we just question ourselves that like are we even trying are we doing or are we doing the best or are we doing the best we can like we're just trying to I guess prove something
00:08:57
Speaker
maybe not to anyone but for ourselves. This thing is like truth that like we all have responsibilities and goals that we want to achieve. There are like just so many like countless things that we want to do or we have to do sometimes.
00:09:13
Speaker
And so many of it actually depends on us, like ourselves. And there's just seriousness in everything, not just some small things or simple things. It's just like, I think there's seriousness in every problem that we could face or we can think of. Sometimes I think
Overthinking and Stress Management
00:09:30
Speaker
They might not be a problem in that thing certain thing I guess but we can make it a serious thing and turn it into a problem just because the way it is and that's why sometimes we have to think about like the emphasis we are putting in the seriousness in life that can kind of put us into this narrow way of understanding what is actually worth our time and attention and
00:09:54
Speaker
It can't even make us like super super not productive and just kind of like make us super nervous about just one thing in particular and can't do anything else. This literally happened to me like other day I think like I had to do something that day like bunch of other work to do and I remember I got a text from my sister and stuff I just couldn't focus like I was just keep focusing on that
00:10:20
Speaker
I'm not just saying this to blame my sister for whatever she's sending. I'm just saying this happens also other times with my dad or friends or whatever. And I just like, okay, I can't do this. I have to focus on that. I have to do this. Then I just drop everything. I just have to focus on that or I just cannot concentrate.
00:10:35
Speaker
Then I just realized that we have to ask ourselves certain questions about certain things that like, why is this even bothering us in the first place? And also, there are other things you can come to that you can't just take everything like that super seriously. Because that could be a small thing, maybe it's a big thing or not. But you also have other things to do at that moment.
00:10:59
Speaker
So I know it's very difficult to just like turn it off and just be like I can't like I'm not gonna think about it I'm just gonna do my work It's it doesn't work like that And it's not like we are robots or machines that like we like turn it off or don't focus in that area Do this job like it doesn't work like that But the way it can work is that like sometimes in those moments you have to just think about like wait What is going on? What is happening?
00:11:29
Speaker
Like, is this something that I can control right now? Is this something that worth my time? Or is this something that I can do something about it? Maybe you can do something about it later, but you cannot do something about it right now. So if you, if you just answers a bunch of questions to yourself, then like you can't do any of these things, then why bother to waste your time? Because every new day, every time of your life could be a new beginning.
Balancing Life and Growth
00:11:58
Speaker
New beginning to many things and I'm not just trying to say just to like even take make your day more serious than it already is just to say that like don't like worry yourself too much and this is an example I would say is that like because it worked for me maybe you guys can try it too the things that like when happen like this like I cannot concentrate on certain things I try to meditate and I'm like not like a meditator like I'm serious I don't even think that's a word
00:12:26
Speaker
I'm not like that like serious like that like I can't just be like oh let me meditate like quick I just I can't focus that fast but I have been really trying to focus on that like just listening to me sometimes even relaxing music closing my eyes or just even actually recently been trying the calm app like it has helped me so much just to get thoughts out of my head just to just kind of clear my mind then focus on what I'm focusing
00:12:53
Speaker
literally you can do this for yourself too like literally I can picture myself doing that like close your eyes whatever is bothering you just let it go seriously just let it go because you can't do anything about it or it's not even your problem just let it go like just focus on that sound that's coming from I don't know like again
00:13:16
Speaker
There's instrumental music you can use, there's relaxing sounds. Literally Spotify has so many playlists if you don't have comms, so it really helps so much. And then, you know, go on with your work. The thing is, we have to think it very differently when it comes to that. Like, when we become too serious about everything, being seriousness can actually, like having that serious attitude, can actually hurt ourselves. Like, it can hurt ourselves to make connections with people.
00:13:44
Speaker
and we can't just hurt ourselves to make like genuine connections with people that can actually have like positive influence on our lives because I think the way maybe we are taught and the way even sometimes I am like raised because of I don't know my background the way I have been taught and the way it looked like from my parents that's why I don't recommend this at all not trying to trash on parents that's another topic
00:14:10
Speaker
But relaxed personality from the way I grew up sounded like it's an indication of being irresponsible. But the truth is having a relaxed personality and the attitude of taking life not too seriously is not an indication of that. It's actually an indication of you have grown and you are growing. You are in this growth process that you can achieve so many things in your life.
00:14:38
Speaker
it doesn't mean that you're irresponsible, it doesn't mean that you're lazy. I think that's what the society makes us want to think, that like, if you're not always working, if you're not making everything about your work, anything like that, if you don't have time, if you don't, like, if you have too much time in your hand, like, this, this, this, like, no.
Performance of Life and Fear of Rejection
00:14:57
Speaker
Because I think what happens is that, like, generally, generally, when we are taking ourselves too seriously, we are essentially looking for approval from people.
00:15:07
Speaker
I know this very well because this is me, literally me. Because we just think that people would reject us if we don't do certain things. We have this fear of rejection. And this essentially just prevents us from living our lives, living our best lives, or the best potential that we could have. And we just allow ourselves to become, I don't know, judged by people.
00:15:32
Speaker
And this thing is sometimes, people are not even judging, we are just judging ourselves. And we start to think that we need to do this to qualify, to be worthy of someone. Because we have to please them, we have to perform in a certain way, and we have to be just perfect in a certain way so they can just approve us, so they can look at us differently. They can be like, oh, Marce is so hardworking, Marce is that, or that person is that.
00:16:01
Speaker
No, because let me consider ourselves like this. And I think I had an episode like this with Candy Washington. You can definitely listen to this because she was also mentioning this too. She was talking about like how life is not about like this performance process. It's about the journey. And so that's why I want to mention here is that like because sometimes and I also do this a lot.
00:16:23
Speaker
I think of the world as like it's just like a stage or I don't know, film set, anything like that. And I just think that like, oh, okay, I'm just an actor and I have to perform certain things to please people. And this just like this, this is not healthy at all. Like even just saying that loud, it just sounds not healthy because it makes us super, super miserable.
00:16:48
Speaker
because living life like it's an endless performance it is so exhausting like it is seriously so exhausting to be doing that because the truth is like if you're living your life like that what is your real life because life is real
00:17:04
Speaker
either it's bad or good like it is real and if you keep pretending to do something or to achieve certain things it's gonna get it like it's gonna get tiring at one point you might think it's not in the beginning but it does get tiring
00:17:22
Speaker
And this comes back to me as it's hard to say.
Accepting Flaws and Avoiding Self-Improvement Traps
00:17:25
Speaker
So a lot of the times people who do this are the people who are perfectionists like me or who cannot tolerate the imperfections and vulnerabilities. You just don't want to accept that you have any flaws. It's more like you have flaws but you are trying to fix them to be good instead of accepting that.
00:17:43
Speaker
I think that's something I struggled so hard in nowadays. I'm just trying to accept it in certain ways, some things I'm still working on. I feel like, but in the past I was just like, I'm not good. I can't do this. I can't do that. It was like, I feel like sometimes at some point in your life, and I think this comes with the age most of the time, you start to understand your flaws.
00:18:02
Speaker
And instead of hating your flaws, you're kind of embracing them because it's just part of being human. Like we are not made to be perfect and we are not perfect. So and it is okay to accept that. I think when we start to like actually not excessively worrying about certain things and thinking about every question that we can come up with, be like, what if we do that? What if I got that? What if I did this? What if I got a better score? What if I had more money? What if I did this?
00:18:32
Speaker
Like, that's not going to be a healthy cycle for you. Because this cycle is not a responsible way to deal with life's challenges. Because when you're so busy worrying about everything else that you need to, I don't know, sort it out, you need to fix it, you're just missing out on so many little things that actually matters in life that you can actually enjoy.
00:18:58
Speaker
Because you missed out on these opportunities that can actually make you happy and make you feel content, once in your life at least. You can seriously feel content and connect with people on a very, very deep level.
Self-Care vs. Societal Norms
00:19:15
Speaker
Because in a world, I feel like in the perfect world, everyone should take like self-care seriously and themselves and put themselves first. I think society, the way everyone is, everything try to portray us is like, oh, it's selfish or whatever. It's not. I think we have to put ourselves first and our self-care first. This is very important because nowhere is near perfect and nothing is near perfect.
00:19:44
Speaker
I think when we think about like oh this person is doing that or this company is doing that or like whatever whatever you think they were perfect they might look like they're perfect from the outside there are so many things that is going wrong inside that you don't even know i mean literally some days like we have earthquake in the world and the next day sun still goes up and down like i'm just saying or like it rains or whatever they're still going
00:20:11
Speaker
So we have to think about ourselves like this too sometimes, like we are changing, we are evolving every single day, even a little bit. But when we are so stressed about everything else that's going on in our lives, that we don't get to actually enjoy this process.
00:20:28
Speaker
I would say this very like, I mean so honestly, I think in college I've worried so much about like getting good grades and everything. I don't think I actually enjoy the process of being in college and being with people and being with the people of my age group.
00:20:49
Speaker
until the very last year. I think first two years I didn't get to enjoy it because I was so focused on work and I was just trying to get better grades. Then I realized that college is not just about that. Although everyone is making, I mean the society is like oh you have to get a better grade or GPA or whatever so you can qualify for whatever.
00:21:05
Speaker
Guess what? It doesn't matter. Because even I remember when I was applying for jobs, no one asked for my diploma or my GPA. No one. I mean, no one asked that. I think we just have to, for our own sanity, literally have to just get these things out of our head and stop taking, like, everything so seriously.
00:21:26
Speaker
and actually understand the differences in our life and enjoy this process. Because whatever we want in our life, we are going to get it eventually if we actually work for it. But we don't have to just, I don't know, stress ourselves out. Instead, like, let's just say if you have a goal I'm going to talk about in a little bit, you have to think about how you can achieve that goal and in the process of achieving that goal, enjoy what you're doing. Here's the thing.
Careers vs. Personal Life Balance
00:21:53
Speaker
In America, and I am gonna sound so European by saying this, is that like, I think we tend to make career our life. We think that having a job is our life. But the truth is, having a job is one thing, but that's not our life. We could be a doctor, we could be a dentist, we could be, I don't know, an actor, we could be a content creator.
00:22:17
Speaker
But MERS is not just content creator and same as you who you are listening right now. You're not just a student or you're not just, I don't know, working at Starbucks or I don't know, I'm just randomly guessing. I'm just saying you're not just that person. You're not a barista.
00:22:34
Speaker
just random things it's like you're more than that you could be a boyfriend you could be a girlfriend you could be a sister you could be a brother you're more than that like there's so many other things in life that we can actually focus on literally just spending time with our family or friends or like
00:22:52
Speaker
having a hobby, doing things that we can actually enjoy. It's not about every single thing. And there are other things I know some people are going to mention this is that like, oh, in order to do certain things that I enjoy, I need money, like I have to work for. But there are also certain things that like, even if you have the money for it, or if you don't have the money for it, well, I'm not saying to go bankrupt for it. But if you had saved some money,
00:23:17
Speaker
You don't want to stress yourself out by saving some money. Instead, use some of that money to just, I don't know, treat yourself once in a while. That could feel actually good. Instead of just saving your money all the time. I know this for myself too, it's like I'm a big saving person. I save a lot of money and I put so much money in stocks because I want to just do
00:23:40
Speaker
better returns than that. But sometimes I also realize that I can't just save everything because then I don't do anything for myself. I realize that sometimes I have to do something for myself so I can fulfill myself some days because I can't just live my life like that. So you have to think of that too, but also think of it in a little bit of a budget. Don't just always calculate what am I spending on this? What am I spending on this coffee? What am I spending on that? Like,
00:24:03
Speaker
don't go crazy on that because that's not really living that's kind of like surviving and you don't want to survive your life you want to live your life and the way we can actually live our lives and I want to essentially conclude with that is that like we have to really relax in the moment and something I mentioned before you can definitely try meditating it really helps a lot
Enjoying the Journey and Personal Growth
00:24:23
Speaker
But most importantly, we have to actually appreciate the journey we have in our lives instead of the goal we are trying to achieve. This is something I mentioned earlier before, so I will elaborate on that. Every single time in our lives, and I would say this from myself too, is that we always think that, oh, I have this goal.
00:24:44
Speaker
Like, I don't know, I'm going to do this. I'm going to become a graphic designer or I'm going to become a millionaire or stuff like that. Right. And you think that once you become that or once you do that, when you achieve that, you're going to be happy. Right. And you never think about the process that you have to do to get there. Right. I mean, obviously, you're just going to think about it like, oh, what I have to do and everything like that. Right.
00:25:10
Speaker
but you have to remember that that's not going to be your end goal because as a human being, this is just so true. I remember this from my childhood too. I will say this example. As a human being, we are so hungry. We are always hungry for more.
00:25:25
Speaker
Once we achieve one thing, we want something else, then something else, then something else. So here's an example. When I was a little kid, again, I mentioned before, I'm a big saving person. I save a lot of money, then I would save it to buy something that I actually need.
00:25:43
Speaker
So, when I was a kid, I wasn't getting a lot of money from my parents, but I would get some allowances. But it was only enough money to just get some food. Like, it wasn't more. It wasn't a lot. Some days, what I would do is that, like, I would actually have some food from home, or sometimes, like, I was so crazy. I would not eat at all during, like, all the periods, then when I get home, like, during lunchtime. Well, not lunchtime. It was, like, 2, 3 p.m.
00:26:09
Speaker
I would eat and I would save that money. I don't know, one time I got I think, I don't know, I would get like some electronics. I was so into electronics back then. Some playstations, some games, like I really liked all that kind of stuff. And some of them were expensive, you know, like it wasn't cheap, so.
00:26:28
Speaker
I would get kind of stuff and I would be like okay if I get this I will be fine then after that I remember I changed my goal I wanted something else and everything that I wanted something else it was never just going to stop I mean this is just some random things when I was a kid but I'm just saying even nowadays
00:26:43
Speaker
If I look back, I think I started this whole career is that like barely four years ago, seriously barely four years ago, I started taking seriously in 2017, like end of 2017, something like that. It was just literally random thing because I was just thinking like, oh, it's extra money. I need to do it. I was out of college. I needed the money. And I was like, okay, something I can work on.
00:27:07
Speaker
When I was in college, when I was about to graduate or even when I was in my last year and after I even graduated, this never came out of my head. Like I never thought this would be something I would be doing. I just thought like I would do being graphic design full time and that that would be it. That's what I thought. I never thought anything else. But here I am and doing something I love. Definitely not the not exactly where I am right now, but definitely getting there. Still, like four, three years ago, I never thought I would be here.
00:27:34
Speaker
But here I am. I'm just saying, I have achieved so many things. I have worked with so many brands and it has been an amazing experience. And that's what I'm trying to learn on. It's like, yes, I don't have millions of followers. I don't have a verified account or anything like that. But I still love the process that I'm going through. I'm working with so many brands. I'm learning so many things every single day and I'm so happy about it.
00:27:56
Speaker
and that's why you need to have to tell yourself sometimes that like maybe you didn't get there yet but you have to make your goals small goals and enjoy those little process that you go along the way because life is not a sprint it's just a journey and you have to enjoy that journey lastly i want to just tell you guys this because life has contained like life has so many cycles like i just wish i mean i don't want to say it like that like i just wish that like life was just full of rainbows
Humor and Balanced Perspective
00:28:25
Speaker
and just like
00:28:25
Speaker
oh balloons like pink balloons and everywhere like it was just always you know happy things like life is just always good but just truth is like it's just not like that all the time you know we can't control everything around us and and not everything that should be in control there are things that we just have to let it go
00:28:47
Speaker
But in order to end this vicious cycle sometimes with ourselves just taking it too seriously, we have to add little humor to our life and surround ourselves with just funny people and sometimes not listening to the news or watching the news. I mean, it's good to be informed, but you don't always need to be worrying about certain things like, oh, there's an earthquake or there's this going on, this going on. I mean, there's always something bad going on. That's why the news exists.
00:29:16
Speaker
And sometimes watching a comedy, like I love comedy or sometimes I even watch sci-fi or something that I want to watch. That's why reality, why do you think, why do you guys think reality shows exist? Because like you watch it because they're, I don't know, it's just looks so fun and like they're just, it's some, like you just say like, okay, this is something could be real. And you don't want to think about it on your life because you don't want to take lives too seriously. But at the same time, that doesn't mean that when you feel bad or when you feel sad certain times,
00:29:45
Speaker
Don't deal with those feelings definitely deal with them. Like you should be okay to be vulnerable because you have to move from Measuring things measuring every ability or whatever you're trying to do Instead of measuring them put them into possibilities how you can turn that into possibilities or how some possibilities will come your way and
00:30:09
Speaker
because we just have to learn that how we can you know just enjoy those little things in our lives and some things to not take it too seriously because at the end of the day life is really short seriously guys life is really short I don't want to sound like
00:30:24
Speaker
I know like that is something not a lot of us want to talk about. I'm not going to talk about. I'm just mentioning that like it is important to just enjoy the process.
Conclusion and Appreciating Small Wins
00:30:34
Speaker
Alright guys, so that was the episode for today. I want to share a little bit of with you guys as this is something I think a lot of us are struggling right now, especially because of
00:30:44
Speaker
everything going on around us right now so it's okay to just take a step back a little bit and enjoy ourselves and enjoy the little things or little accomplishments that we have in our lives. Thank you guys so much for listening to this episode and I'll see you guys next week. Bye guys!