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Ep: 11. In a Flurry
48 Plays9 months ago
Happy belated International Women’s Week.
This episode begins in a flurry, it took over an hour to get the remote recording working (tech issues on Ambers end). During this hour, Amber was stretched out on a hotel bed drinking some pineapple, canned, cocktail concoction after a full day of International Women’s Week conference. Whilst Jade was drinking a beer and overheating in her wardrobe, which was the best recording option available to her.
The conversation begins with both sisters describing how their year began in a flurry and moved on to deeper and philosophical content such as existential dread and disorganised linen cupboards!
Amber describes her ‘in a flurry hands’ as “two crabs touching each other on a mirror”, a confusing and somewhat disturbing image that we shouldn’t read too much into.
Both sisters reflect on the contributing factors such as peri-menopause, fear of scarcity and the mental load. They also talk about the potential impact of long term flurriness, such as drawing others into the whirlwind, taking on more than they have capacity for and the inevitable burnout.
Amber’s Semi-precious moment could have an entire episode devoted to it. To sum it up, she eats like an unattended 7year old when away from home and on her own.
As for Jade’s, well… Amber accuses her of ‘youngest child narcissism’, which Jade adamantly defends and reframes as self soothing. And seeing as she in the mental health professional here (and she is writing this episode summary) we’ll just say that she was right!
Dr Fatima Khan is the Menopause specialist that Amber mentions.
https://www.instagram.com/menopausespecialist
To follow and subscribe to your mildly unhinged SEMI-PRECIOUS hosts, you can connect via Instagram and
Linktree
https://linktr.ee/semi_precious_podcast
Connect with Jade:
If you are wanting to understand more about Jade and her counselling practice or ADHD Coaching you can visit Awaken ADHD or on socials Instagram and Facebook
Connect with Amber:
If you’ are curious about Amber and her brand agency you can visit The Edison Agency or follow her on socials LinkedIn or Instagram
CREDITS
Producer: Amber Bonney and Jade Bonney
Hosts: Amber Bonney and Jade Bonney
Sound Editing: Jade Bonney
Social Content Creator: Amber Bonney
Creative Director: Amber Bonney
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Transcript
Acknowledgment of Traditional Owners
00:00:00
Speaker
This podcast is recorded on the lands of the Boon Wurrung country and we wish to acknowledge them as traditional owners. We recognise First Peoples of Australia as the original storytellers of this country and pay our respects to elders past, present and emerging.
Introduction of the Hosts
00:00:18
Speaker
You are listening to a semi-precious podcast hosted by Uncut and Unpolished sisters Amber and Jade.
00:00:27
Speaker
And I believe we are recording. Go for it. Am I doing the intro? Yes. Yeah, I think you're doing the intro. Hello. Wow, that's great. That's where Amber's at. That's your intro for semi-precious episode 11. Amber doesn't give a fuck.
00:00:51
Speaker
Let's try that again. Hello, listeners.
Theme of 'Being in a Flurry'
00:00:54
Speaker
Welcome to semi-precious episode 11, where we are talking about being in a flurry. And two things. One, it's International Women's Week, which is just a general shitshow on flurry. And two, it's taking us one hour to try and remote record. Can I just say it's taken
00:01:17
Speaker
Us or you? And now I'm just going to push back. Yeah. Yeah. Well, I sent you a link. Just click the link. It should be that simple. Uh, there are a few notes here. Now a flurry, a small swirling mass of something, especially snow or leaves moved by a sudden gust of wind. Dibs of snow, you can be leaves. Okay.
00:01:44
Speaker
Sure. I don't know why. Now I'm regretting my choice. You're just going to melt. You're just the olaf of this pandemic. I'll just be an internal winter. You're just a leaf that's fallen off the tree and you're just going to go brown and crusty and die. Yeah, I'm going to blow around. I'm going to be so free. Yeah, you look free. You seem free. I'm feeling
Starting 2024 in a Flurry
00:02:08
Speaker
so free.
00:02:09
Speaker
Yeah, so this is all about the sense of being in a flurry, which I personally feel like not only is most of my life, but also how we've kicked off 2024. Also note to self, my experience with the flurry is a little bit less exciting than the McDonald's version of the flurry. It's a bit more chaotic and not as tasty.
00:02:34
Speaker
Yeah, my daughter asked me from McFlurry the other day because somebody took her to McDonald's, shout out to Penny, and now she knows what a McFlurry is and she wants one. No, you don't. No, you don't, child. You don't. All right, so this was your topic initiator.
Recording from Different Locations
00:02:53
Speaker
Oh, was it? Yeah, I think you texted me. Sure. What about a flurry for next episode? I'm not sure. So I can't remember that I've texted you about a flurry.
00:03:02
Speaker
Right. I was sitting here in my cupboard on Saturday because I'm actually in my wardrobe right now because we're not recording together. Amber is in Sydney for International Women's Week and I am in a cupboard. This is how we live our lives differently. You all live in your best life? Who do you want to speak to?
00:03:23
Speaker
I don't know. But anyway, what was I saying? I'm in a cupboard. I was in a cupboard on Saturday because Amber and I made a time whilst her child was at a birthday party to record this episode. And she got my nails done.
00:03:41
Speaker
Hmm, priorities, listeners, priorities. Um, look, I will send a photo of my nails. They're looking quite fabulous actually. Yeah, I really can't wait. Um, anyway, so you're, you're in a flurry. What is this year? Cause we're already in March and I've been having nightmares about not having an episode out and it's already March. Um,
00:04:05
Speaker
Why are you in a flurry? Why did the year start so flurry like? Oh, thank you for asking, Jade. All right.
Amber's Chaotic Post-Christmas Break
00:04:14
Speaker
All right. Well, firstly, I went away after Christmas for 10 days, which was partially relaxing and partially not relaxing. And I was very excited by the prospect that I was taking pretty much most of January off with a week in the middle that I had to go back to work.
00:04:34
Speaker
So I came back from traveling for 10 days, and you know when you're traveling with the family.
00:04:42
Speaker
It is a break, but then it's also not a break at the same time. So I then had the week off and my husband went back to work. So I was like quite smug about that because I'm like, I've still got another week off. And then after just getting through the shit show of just, you know, admin from December that you've completely ignored, we then had like an issue with the cat that cost us thousands of dollars and two nights in
00:05:09
Speaker
Poor little Chester. And yeah, anyway, thanks Chester for that. So I kind of felt like between the admin and then four or five days of nursing a cat and stressing about the cat and having to make dispensations for said cat's new diet and or living arrangement.
00:05:31
Speaker
and having the nine-year-old at home, that wasn't super raxing. I go back to work on the Monday feeling pretty emotionally shattered, a few thousand dollars lighter, and do a week, a pretty intense week of work, because I'm sort of also catching up on what I'd missed the week for. And then I'm like, ha ha ha, I've got another week off, so excited. No, the universe.
00:05:57
Speaker
Says to me, I know you want to relax this week, but hey, I'm going to give you COVID instead. Yeah. And then February just rolled on through in a shit show.
COVID Interruptions
00:06:07
Speaker
Flurry. Flurry. And, um, yeah, here we are in March. Happy International Women's Day, everyone. Wow. That sounds fun. Yeah. What have you got to say? You never hear of a man in a flurry.
00:06:21
Speaker
Like, you know, hands flapping, moving about with that anxious energy from task to task like we do. I'm actually doing mum hands, though I've really just noticed that. OK, it's not mum hands as in a mum's hands, but our mum's hands. We may have mentioned them. OK, they're representing your internal fluffy hands. It's the combo of the flap. And then, you know, when you press your fingertips together and kind of like move your hands up and down almost like
00:06:50
Speaker
Two crabs touching each other on a mirror. Or one crab on a mirror. Two crabs touching each other on a mirror. Or like a Huntsman on a mirror.
00:07:01
Speaker
Speaking of Huntsman's, my daughter, when I was at work the other day, sent me a video of her playing with a Huntsman. It was just like crawling all over her body. What? A giant, giant Huntsman. Was this at school? No, this was in my backyard. What? My nine-year-old was filming my 12-year-old, and then she's taking close-up photos of it, and she's like, look how fairy and cute it is. Never send them to me or us. Send them to you for sure.
00:07:30
Speaker
happening now. Yeah, but I think the flurry might be pretty women-centric. So the word is definitely women-centric, but I agree that potentially even the sentiment. I mean, I don't know. I need to ask my husband what he would say instead of a flurry. I mean, maybe there's kind of anxious energy or very busy, but
00:07:59
Speaker
I don't know. I think all ADHDs would probably resonate with the flurry though, to be honest.
Jade's Busy Practice and Personal Challenges
00:08:04
Speaker
So, do you want to hear about my flurry for the start of year? Are you interested at all? Not really interested, but for the sake of everyone else. Yes.
00:08:14
Speaker
Oh, thanks for not asking, Abs. That's awesome. So I thought the year would start slowly in my practice. So I went back on the Tuesday, which I think was the second, and I was really prepared for it to be pretty slow.
00:08:32
Speaker
usually at that time of year, people are in a flurry and stressed. They're just suppressing that shit, you know, like holding it in. But no, nobody wanted to hold it in anymore. Everybody decided to book, which is fine.
00:08:47
Speaker
It's fine. It's fine. But we also had my daughter's friend down from Queensland. So I had two 12 year olds and I was pretty much just running from taking them for beach trips and movies and dinners.
00:09:03
Speaker
and back to work to see my clients and then back again. So I really didn't stop and to be honest, the first few weeks of January were the busiest my practice has ever been. So I was very surprised.
00:09:19
Speaker
Of course, December's such chaos. Is that normal that everyone's like, oh, yes, now I remember my relationship? Not in January. No, they usually wait till March. They're just like, no, I don't have time and energy for that. I'm just going to put it all put it all on hold. I can't speak for everybody's experience or practice. But when I was experiencing a flurry of
00:09:44
Speaker
was relationship issues, gee, what a surprise. But a lot of post-COVID, post-lockdown relationship stuff, it's still emerging. In fact, for some people, it's only just emerging now, which is weird, but also expected, to be honest. There's only so long you can hold that stuff in.
00:10:07
Speaker
Yeah, that's true. Yeah, so I wasn't prepared for it and I just forgot to put the brakes on. I think I just kept going and then I started to feel the signs of burnout just by the end of January. I was feeling very stretched and a little bit in a flurry. I was listening to a talk today
00:10:27
Speaker
on an International Burns Week event. You know, the commentary, this is from an organizational psychologist who was talking about the fact that
00:10:41
Speaker
Yeah, I suppose there's been over the last five years between Black Lives Matter, the Me Too movement, COVID and global conflict, which is still happening now and, you know, in the news every single day, that potentially there's just mass
00:11:01
Speaker
community burnout in general. Yes. Yes. There is. And there's this, as much as I want to care about all the current affairs, and I certainly do, there's only so much I can look at and engage with because it's just too much. And what I'm hearing from a lot of people that I'm working with is,
00:11:21
Speaker
Even though they're at absolute capacity, they're still spending a lot of time really engaging in all of these really, really horrific stories regularly, which again makes sense. They care.
00:11:35
Speaker
But they're actually just perpetuating their own demise in the process. Yes. And I get caught in that. It's kind of like the doom
Community Burnout and Personal Limits
00:11:43
Speaker
scrolling. It's the doom doom scrolling. I know I need to have empathy and not know what's happening. But then at the same time, I don't have mental availability.
00:11:56
Speaker
to expose myself to the horrors and so I'll then go into a loop of ignore it and then I'll keep cycling around. Right. I think I give myself a little bit more permission sometimes to not engage because I'm engaging in people's personal stories and traumas
00:12:16
Speaker
all day every day, so I have to protect myself even a little bit more. You're right, this person was right. I did ask my husband, and this is obviously quite a binary response, male, female, but he's saying he would use the expression flurry, he would use the expression under the pump or shit storm. I can see that.
00:12:46
Speaker
I mean, I said she a lot or hot mess. Yeah, she's on hot mess. But the flurry with the arms flapping. Yeah. Yeah, I don't feel like that's, that's really there. Did you just ask him while we're here chatting? Yeah. Yeah. I'm definitely listening to you. You're definitely here. You're not half listening. No. Seeking external contact. And you're also moving around the mirror board again, I can see you.
00:13:12
Speaker
in the mirror board, which is where we keep all of our notes people. If you're listening for the first time, digital whiteboard, digital whiteboard. Yes, I accidentally typed over your notes. And I'm not sure why my brain didn't interpret green for Jade, orange for Amber, but I
00:13:32
Speaker
started typing over the top of yours and then undo it all. You know what, Amber, I've just had an epiphany right now that, you know, what drives your flurry, which is the next kind of question, is you don't know the difference between red light, green light, orange light. Like it's just all go to you. It's just one. It's just all go. I've lost my license multiple times.
00:14:01
Speaker
Yeah, it could be. It could be. Let's hope my battery doesn't die because I had a full battery before we started the flurry of trying to get you online. Not here. I'm in a cupboard. I'm in a cupboard. OK. Anyway, so you also put menopause on there. We talked a lot about that today, actually. In this session, there was a menopause specialist as
Perimenopause and Mental Load
00:14:24
Speaker
one of the speakers. Oh, was there? Fascinating. I'm listening to lots of menopause podcasts at the moment.
00:14:30
Speaker
really solid executive functioning, I would be able to tell you who that person was, but instead, I'm having to refer to my notes. So that is a reason that I do often feel like I'm in a flurry because of the perimenopause. The perimenopause is her name. And I think on Instagram, she is something like the menopause doctor or something like that.
00:14:59
Speaker
I'll put it in the show notes. Put it in the show notes. She was fabulous, actually. There is also sort of the mental load. I'm not sure if I've just got reduced capacity during menopause to carry all of the load, but I do sometimes get overwhelmed by the volume of things that are in my head.
00:15:20
Speaker
You know, we already are on the back foot with ADHD being executive functioning disturbances and challenges and whatever you want to say. And then menopause also interrupts our executive functioning, reduces its capacity. Yeah, like last night, I was just in an absolute, I was irritated. My husband couldn't breathe the right way. I just, everything, I just felt all of my nerve endings were exposed. And then I got into a flurry
00:15:49
Speaker
about which project in the garden I wanted to do next. And I dreamt all night about like crushed rocks. And I couldn't sleep because I was still all night just in an absolute spin over garden projects. Clearly it's not about the garden, but that was the last flurry that I was in for the day. It's not fun. No, because I'm on
00:16:14
Speaker
hormone replacement therapy, I don't get the moodiness any more, but I still get the executive functioning deficits, which honestly, if I did not have my mobile device and my notes, I just don't even think I could get through that. Like I have everything in my notes because it's just the only way that I can recall information.
00:16:40
Speaker
Um, I have put another note on here saying, uh, with a picture of Britney Spears. Did you like that? I did. Yeah. Just a bit of body aspiration. Yeah. Um, a bit not from all that can chew. I mean, this is a good old and betrayed if there is ever one. Yeah, it is. That's what I said. The over-committing. I've never, I've never really gotten better at that. Maybe I never will. Green light.
00:17:10
Speaker
Red light, orange light. Um, yeah, that's all I have to say on that. All right. So what drives your flurry? Obviously bitten off more than you can chew. And what is the cost of the flurry, not the McFlurry? Cause I know what the cost of that would be with my lactation tolerance. What are they? What are McFlurry's costs these days? No, like the physical cost I'm talking.
00:17:38
Speaker
Yeah, I know. But then you've just triggered an interesting thought in my mind. It's not interesting, Dad. We're probably like 12 dollars now. Probably. What is the cost? Increase anxiety, physical fatigue, overwhelm, and then potentially self-deprecating internal monologue around why do you continue to do this?
00:18:08
Speaker
Why, why, why? Why do you keep setting yourself up for burnout and failure? I said fear of scarcity and just reminded of kind of that Renee Brown idea of, you know, we say yes and we take on more than we can just in case.
00:18:27
Speaker
It stops. Whatever the flow of it is, the client stop, the money stops, the invitation stop, the friends stop, whatever. And I think that sometimes is a driving force for me. It's all happening. I'm just going to take it whilst it's here and that gets me into trouble. One of my life anxieties is that there's just not enough life.
00:18:54
Speaker
We're meant to have life goals, but she's got life anxieties. I remember thinking about these when I was lining up in about grade three to go into class.
00:19:08
Speaker
I remember that that was my first thought of like, you know, when you're young and you have those existential thoughts, like what am I doing here? What is this all about? Why is the universe infinite? How does sound travel? And then you just get into a spiral. Yes, I have that.
00:19:29
Speaker
Those existential spirals, I would say every few weeks. It's probably, it probably goes along with my cycle, probably monthly. I'm like, why am I here? It's aside from my always on motor and the propensity for risk. I think I just get bored and I know that I'm very aware that life is quite short. I don't want to feel like I'm, you know, missing out on something.
00:19:56
Speaker
Yeah, no, that's it. I mean, for a second it sounded like you were saying, no, your existential crisis is like a grade three and mine are more sophisticated. But then when you articulated yours, yeah, that's it. Sometimes I'm like, am I just wasting my time here? I don't have much time left. And I'm like, I should be doing something. And then I'm like,
00:20:19
Speaker
overwhelmed because I'm doing too much stuff and then I just perpetually are in this.
Anxiety and Mismatched Linens
00:20:24
Speaker
Yeah, sometimes I get in the ideal house loop. Like I've always had this dream of having a house that I just really love. I feel that way about my linen cupboard, like I have linen cupboard anxiety that
00:20:38
Speaker
I've always had linen cupboard anxiety. If I ever get a linen cupboard that just works. Do you remember that linen cupboard? And there were so many ill matching pillow cases.
00:20:53
Speaker
like 50,000 pillowcases of every design. Amber, that's what happened. Please help me. It's a problem and it causes me anxiety. I actually thought about pillowcases today. It's an issue, but clearly there's trauma. We're talking about pillowcases. I feel the way about the linen cupboard, as people would feel about wearing clean underwear in case they're in an accident.
00:21:21
Speaker
I feel just the same about the linen cupboard. Someone is going to need to get a towel and go, oh, my God, why are they mismatching? Like, where is the dinner cupboard to go with that? That's why I keep my towels in the bathroom nicely rolled up. And that's why when I have a guest over, I leave the towel that's nice and matching with the face washer on the end of their bed so they don't get to see.
00:21:48
Speaker
my chaos. Well, we'll say a little hack if anyone doesn't do this that our sister and sister's wife taught us is that you put the sheet set and or the dooner
00:22:04
Speaker
into the pillowcase with the other pillowcase and then you bundle it up like a little bundle of joy. Yeah, a little package. Here's the single. Yeah. Who the fuck is labelling sheets and why are they not labelling them sufficiently? And why can't they just get together with the zip people?
00:22:22
Speaker
And just sort some zips out on these things. I don't want to be buttoning. I don't want to be press studying. I don't want to be buttoning. I just want to zip that thing closed and it be neat and not have those little puckers at the end. I'm just. This is a fascinating podcast podcast.
00:22:39
Speaker
All right. Well, I'm not down for the buttons. Let's move on. Can you please just read out that little orange square that you were hovering over? There is a note here that says, so this is in reference to being a flurry, maybe I will come back as a squirrel on meth, which I feel like is kind of me currently, but in human form.
00:23:02
Speaker
or a neurosurgeon. They're not really related now that I say it out loud, except a squirrel on meth, it sort of feels like they're getting stuff done. And a neurosurgeon, I highly respect. Where were you coming back from? Where did the death part come from? Are you dying?
00:23:28
Speaker
No. Where did your brain go? I don't understand where this came from. Where did I go? I didn't ask you, like, what is the cost? It's the bit I deleted that the context was needed.
00:23:42
Speaker
All righty, good. It was my fear of not having enough life, so trying to cram everything in. And then the next little brain thought was, well, maybe I will die and come back as a squirrel on meth, which I think I already am, or a neurosurgeon, which is aspirational.
00:24:03
Speaker
Okay. And that's the fear of scarcity again that I was saying. The other thing I was saying was one of the costs is my kids and family get caught up in my flurry.
Family Routine Challenges
00:24:15
Speaker
If I've got an agenda or I can't find something because I'm not organized, I'm trying to get out the door or I wake up late and whatever it is that they get
00:24:25
Speaker
caught up or sometimes I haven't had a proper break and I get in the car I'm like right girls I've got to do this and I've only had half a banana today because I've been going going going I haven't had a break it's terrible to get them caught up in it I will say a bit of a caveat I don't do that until they're being assholes
00:24:45
Speaker
Just saying. That if they didn't just walk in and throw all their crap all over the floor and then just make a huge mess and get in the way and then complain if I ask them to do their one job of emptying the dishwasher, I probably would just be nice mum and hold all my stuff together. But when they do that and then complain, that's when I get a little bit high horse. Here's my flurry.
00:25:12
Speaker
The other thing that physically happens to me with a flurry interested if this resonates with you is that
00:25:20
Speaker
I always feel like I'm forgetting something important. Yes. Because the rules are all in the air. You know, for women especially, there's, I don't even know what you call this, but the anxiety of leaving your children somewhere, like in the car or forgetting them, that people have this irrational anxiety that that's going to happen.
00:25:46
Speaker
I think what happens is because my brain is so overwhelmed or there's this big sense of dread that I've forgotten something important or I need to be somewhere. Yeah. I think that definitely for me, and I've actually started saying to clients, I don't know, people have opinions on this, but I'm moving on to my next client after this session. I won't have a chance to send you that email or
00:26:11
Speaker
whatever it was that I needed to follow up with them. I intend to do it Thursday when I'm free, but if somehow I miss it, please just send me a text. It's okay to remind me. My intention is to, but the invitation is that you can ask if you haven't received yet. I don't want them to take accountability for it, but I also want them to feel like they can.
00:26:35
Speaker
I make lots of promises. I'm like, oh, yeah, I'll send you that. Oh, I've got this link to this. So hey, this great this. And you have just triggered 10 things that I need to finish today before the night's done. Sorry about that. She was saying that like all of the things that I committed need to be done. All right. Well, I have 18 percent battery. So let's move on to the other thing I want
Pressure of International Women's Week
00:27:01
Speaker
to talk about. It's International Women's Week this week.
00:27:04
Speaker
And as someone that does a lot of advocacy work in this area, the irony is not lost on how exhausting International Women's Week is for women. The extra commitments, the burden of
00:27:25
Speaker
trying, um, feeling the pressure of trying to solve a problem that you didn't create. It's a lot. And I know for many women that work in this space or are active feminists, it's, um, I'm not alone in that. All week and all last week, I've been thinking about like the pressure of acknowledging and showing gratitude
00:27:51
Speaker
to the change makers that I know in my life. Like I've got a note going, I'm like, okay, I need to put this out on socials, I need to know, I need to let these people know how important they are to me. And that's just like another... Another thing I have to do. Another thing I have to do. And then feel guilty about forgetting. Yeah. And just on that, I don't feel so much pressure. I did think, oh, why do I never
00:28:17
Speaker
post on these things or why do I never put a podcast out for the, you know, international this week or that week or what have you. And then I am just kind to myself and go, you know what, I've got enough to do. And in saying that during those weeks, whatever it is, so International Women's Week, when I'm working with the people, the people, I think I do my work and my advocacy in the moment.
00:28:48
Speaker
And I think that relieves the pressure for me. So in the last couple of weeks, and I'm not usually this forward in the session, but I have said to quite a few men this week that not knowing how to cook is not a good excuse and they must learn how to cook. I don't want to hear from a 20 year old, 30 year old, 40 year old, 50 year old that they can't cook, therefore their wife that works full time and manages all the children.
00:29:18
Speaker
has to do the cooking as well. I've really put my foot down this week. I'm like, no, sorry. I was like giving slow cook recipes to men. Yeah. So that's how I'm advocating for International Women's Week. Yeah. My nine year old daughter said the other day, I love it when you cook mum because I love pasta and fried rice and tacos.
00:29:44
Speaker
See, you can at least do that, men. And every now and then when I actually cook properly, the sheer astonishment that I am actually capable of mixing things together in a flavorful way is quite evident. I'm like, I actually can cook. I'm just always in a flurry. Always in a flurry. Right. I'm turning my lights down on my computer so I don't lose battery. We're nearly at the end.
00:30:14
Speaker
How do you stop the flurry becoming burnout? Go. Well, the hike that we said we would do, so the, the great Aussie hike, we are doing, yes, for Beyond Blue in the Wombat State Forest. And we're making it a three night Dalesford retreat for ourselves. Yay. And training for that has just been fantastic. Like this morning I got up and I did 6K in a local national park.
00:30:43
Speaker
with my dog. Dogs were all out there. And so I'm actually moving my body and that means I could just be sitting there doing more housework, doing more paperwork, seeing more clients. But I'm like, no, because I can't let my team down with all my broken hips and stuff. So I'm actually getting out there moving my body and being more mindful and doing cold water swims as well. I think that's just saying no to other things and choosing that. So I think a challenge for me is
00:31:12
Speaker
You know, having some accountability for something like that makes makes it worthwhile for me. I have a very large note that says fuck knows I'm a work in progress. I saw that. I'm not really the expert on how to stop the flurry. Are you not worried about letting us down, Amber, if you can't make the 30K? I will make the 30K. Shut up. It'll be my hips. I heard that you told them that I'd be last. Yeah. Well, yeah.
00:31:41
Speaker
We specifically say Jade will be last. They weren't the words I framed it in.
00:31:49
Speaker
So I'm so determined to get fit in your arms. So between the four of us, Kim said, you can't leave one person at the back. So because there's only four of us, two at the back and then I said, she's trying to justify. And then I said to Claire, so you'll be with Jade then. So yeah, the two of us are back. Thank you. Well, we do have shorter legs. So yes. Exactly. The other thing I would say is just even
00:32:18
Speaker
trying to self-observe or see the flurry. And then remember, do the breath work, even if it's just one. Prioritise or re-prioritise to do the reset. If, yeah, you can see you're in a flurry and you need to get out of it. I was just heard a moment there. Are we the wind or the leaf or snow?
00:32:44
Speaker
In the blurry definition. Well, I think we're both. Right. You're creating the wind around your own leafness. In the bottom of the flurry. The brain is the wind. Yes.
00:33:02
Speaker
making conscious and unconscious decisions about that. Correct. We're down to 14% not feeling the pressure. It's not feeling the pressure. And then the rest of the body and all of our loved ones are the leaves.
00:33:17
Speaker
There was a lot of discussion today at this event that I went to around women being so great at showing empathy and kindness to their friends and giving great practical advice, but ignoring it for themselves. So my advice would be, what would you advise your friend to do? And you do that.
00:33:42
Speaker
Correct, rather harsh self-criticism or standards that we hold ourselves to. Our semi-precious moment. I mean, I've probably had a billion since we recorded. I've had loads too. Episode 10. I just realised it's actually a superfluous section of the podcast because
00:34:04
Speaker
everything is a semi-precious moment in our week. But I did want to say that I have a terrible habit when I'm traveling or when my husband is away of
00:34:21
Speaker
taking care of myself and specifically eating like a six year old unsupervised child. When I said to her that I was making notes and you said, I'm sitting at the hotel eating a peppermint arrow. And also just to make that worse, actually eating a peppermint arrow, I'd eaten cheese and crackers. That was my dinner. A peppermint arrow and a vodka lime and
00:34:49
Speaker
pineapple in a can. Yeah. Okay. All right. Six-year-olds don't usually have the vodka part, but everything else checks out. Last night I did eat a nice steak and I did eat
00:35:04
Speaker
steak for lunch so I didn't want to have another happy meal. But cheese and crackers probably not really successful enough. I also add a bag of cauliflower puffed chips that did also look like something. They look like Cheetos but were made with cauliflower. Yeah, that's not okay. You want to hear mine? Yeah.
00:35:23
Speaker
Okay. So I got in the car and I was in a flurry. The radio was on and I was just kind of reversing out. And I'm like, okay, I need to breathe. Can't be in the flurry. Oh, this is actually nice. Just a bit of triple J. They're just like, no, triple R. I had the radio on and it was just like in the background. And it was just, yeah, too well for triple J. It was just like, dull, slit tones in the background. And then I realized that it was actually Spotify playing my Awakened ADHD podcast.
00:35:52
Speaker
It was me talking to myself. Is that your like fifth youngest child narcissism coming through? No, I think it was my counsellor. It was my inner counsellor self because I'm allowed to do counsellor voice there. It was my inner counsellor self soothing me, not a narcissist. You're a narcissist. Oh, okay. Well, that's for sure.
00:36:19
Speaker
All right, but I am in a cupboard overheating on a 30-degree day. Let's just recap. What have we learnt about each other today?
Reflections on Flurry and Scarcity Mentality
00:36:31
Speaker
Amber is perpetually in a flurry and is the leaf not Olaf? And really, either wants to be a squirrel or a meth or a neurosurgeon. These are two things I did not know about you.
00:36:43
Speaker
Yeah. Well, I think, yeah, I am a squirrel on meth, but neurosurgeon would be a cool job. International Women's Day and Week is an emotional burden. But when I feel like I need to endure, what are you awesome? What's your recap? That I need to push back and say no and not have a face of scarcity. And you need to learn red light, orange light, green light.
00:37:13
Speaker
Let's ponder that for the rest of the week. Yeah. Let's ponder. Ponder away.
00:37:18
Speaker
All right, if you would like to listen to more of our ramblings, please follow and subscribe on your favorite podcast platform. Thanks for listening. Do we know what next episode is? We don't. We don't. We don't. We have been talking about, I still really want to talk about public swimming pools. Yeah, OK. We'll do that. I've had a few requests for that. So yeah, until next time, embrace your uncut and unpolished selves. Bye.
00:37:49
Speaker
This podcast represents the personal opinions of Amber and Jade. No content should be taken as advice or recommendations.