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March Badness 2025: APRIL AWFULNESS
36 Plays2 months ago
The Galanti & Chill Tournament Arc is HERE!
Recommended
Transcript
Introduction and Corrections
00:00:00
dirtycheeks
Good evening, ladies and germs. Welcome to another episode of Galania Chill. And guess what? It's a special episode of Galania Chill. That's right. It's our March badness episode.
00:00:13
dirtycheeks
And i had to watch a lot of shit to get through this March badness. And I want to share it with you fine folks out there. And of course, I'm joined with my co-host, Stephen O'Tieri, Jonathan Suarez, and
00:00:25
Steve-O
Hey, how you doing?
00:00:29
delta slim
Hey, how you doing?
00:00:31
dirtycheeks
And Devin Kopech.
00:00:32
DeeBo
Hey, how you doing?
00:00:34
dirtycheeks
With a special guest star! Timothy Lucas.
00:00:42
dirtycheeks
How's everybody doing today?
00:00:45
delta slim
Shalemoukis.
00:00:48
dirtycheeks
like do
00:00:49
DeeBo
Yeah, we do all day!
00:00:49
dirtycheeks
today
00:00:51
Steve-O
Hey, now, i excuse me, I hate to be a critic, but ah I believe it's April. I believe it's late April.
00:00:57
dirtycheeks
been a, it's been a trying couple of months for all of us.
00:00:59
delta slim
Oh, Timothy.
00:01:00
dirtycheeks
so
00:01:01
Steve-O
You know, the office believe it's March when it's April.
00:01:03
dirtycheeks
Well, you know, it's funny you mentioned that Steve, because after I watched these movies, I separately cursed each and every one of you.
00:01:06
DeeBo
Yeah, defend it, Chris. Defend it.
00:01:12
dirtycheeks
And that's why it took so long.
00:01:12
T-Bag
Yeah.
00:01:12
delta slim
don't know.
00:01:13
dirtycheeks
You're all dealing with the curse. Uh, hopefully it's been taking effect. It's, it's been long enough,
Technical Difficulties and AI Jokes
00:01:19
dirtycheeks
but, uh, thank you.
00:01:19
Steve-O
Oh, yeah.
00:01:22
dirtycheeks
And, uh, fuck you.
00:01:24
T-Bag
yeah
00:01:24
dirtycheeks
um
00:01:25
T-Bag
Yeah, we deserve it.
00:01:26
dirtycheeks
It was ah hell of a group of movies.
00:01:28
T-Bag
Yeah.
00:01:28
Steve-O
Offeril April edition.
00:01:30
dirtycheeks
Awful. Awful. Awful.
00:01:30
T-Bag
Awful April.
00:01:32
Steve-O
Offeril April.
00:01:32
dirtycheeks
Yeah,
00:01:33
delta slim
Oh, man.
00:01:33
T-Bag
um ah Before we get too much further, ah Steve, I do want to point out I'm not seeing my audio recording. It's just a flat line for me.
00:01:41
Steve-O
I'm seeing your lines bouncing, baby.
00:01:42
T-Bag
Okay, cool. I just want to make sure.
00:01:44
dirtycheeks
you're real.
00:01:44
delta slim
I see him. I see him in there, too.
00:01:45
dirtycheeks
You're alive.
00:01:46
T-Bag
i just did did not want to get through this beautiful intro Chris has provided us and then find out we have to do the whole thing over again.
00:01:46
delta slim
That
00:01:46
DeeBo
Oh, yeah.
00:01:49
delta slim
would be really funny.
00:01:53
Steve-O
Tim, why didn't you talk?
00:01:53
dirtycheeks
ah yeah
00:01:54
Steve-O
What the hell?
00:01:55
dirtycheeks
yeah
00:01:57
T-Bag
I've been talking the whole time.
00:01:59
Steve-O
Too many voices.
00:02:00
dirtycheeks
Too many voices. That's what Zencaster hates.
00:02:04
T-Bag
oh
00:02:04
dirtycheeks
Too many impersonations. Yeah, see? ah Steve didn't even hit the button that time. That's just Zencaster. Okay, that's enough Zencaster.
00:02:10
T-Bag
Oh, boy.
00:02:12
dirtycheeks
Alright?
00:02:12
T-Bag
oh boy.
00:02:13
dirtycheeks
Jesus, we get the point. um Wow.
00:02:16
T-Bag
Wow.
00:02:16
DeeBo
Yeah, at what point...
00:02:16
dirtycheeks
Very mature.
00:02:17
T-Bag
Wow.
Explaining March Badness
00:02:18
T-Bag
The reverb on that.
00:02:20
dirtycheeks
Very mature. Yeah, you laugh at your own fucking farts, Zencaster. Um... We're not here to talk about rogue AIs. No, of course not.
00:02:31
dirtycheeks
You gentlemen supplied me with quite the the feast.
00:02:32
DeeBo
sort of.
00:02:37
Steve-O
Yeah, more like rogue BMs.
00:02:38
T-Bag
Oh, boy.
00:02:40
Steve-O
but
00:02:40
dirtycheeks
Did you just call them rogue BMs?
00:02:42
Steve-O
Yeah, rogue bell movements.
00:02:44
dirtycheeks
Jesus Christ.
00:02:44
T-Bag
bowel movements, yeah.
00:02:47
dirtycheeks
um Yeah, these are eight separate bowel movements that I had to pass through myself.
00:02:52
T-Bag
Mm-hmm.
00:02:54
dirtycheeks
And I came out feeling somewhat better because I didn't have to keep doing it, which is every shit I've ever taken
March Badness Rules Discussion
00:03:01
dirtycheeks
in my life. So let's, um should we just jump right into it?
00:03:06
T-Bag
Well, I think we should establish the, ah John, I think we should probably establish the rules that we put on ourselves for this particular round of March Madness, right?
00:03:07
delta slim
Hell yeah.
00:03:11
dirtycheeks
Yes.
00:03:13
delta slim
Yeah, it's been a while.
00:03:14
dirtycheeks
course.
00:03:16
delta slim
So I guess the one rule that we had this time was that it had to have a box office or it had to be released in a theater.
00:03:25
T-Bag
It had to have a verifiable American box office.
00:03:29
delta slim
Yeah, okay.
00:03:30
dirtycheeks
Which I thank you all for because it's much easier to find said movies that way.
00:03:34
delta slim
And I regret to inform you ah Chris, that we are actually going to get rid of that that ah role that and that for next year.
00:03:40
T-Bag
You're going to rescind that rule for 2026.
00:03:41
Steve-O
i
00:03:41
dirtycheeks
ah Fucking
00:03:42
T-Bag
right. Right.
Streaming Trends and Movie List Debates
00:03:43
delta slim
Sorry.
00:03:43
Steve-O
were we're still we're still working on this.
00:03:43
dirtycheeks
shit.
00:03:43
delta slim
Sorry, Chris.
00:03:44
dirtycheeks
God damn it. What the fuck?
00:03:46
Steve-O
We're still honing it.
00:03:47
dirtycheeks
You guys want me to watch this shit on VHS?
00:03:47
delta slim
Yeah, this is a... We're still tweaking it.
00:03:48
T-Bag
ah
00:03:49
delta slim
Yeah. And we might... You know, maybe we'll just... Fuck it. We're just going to Chinese water torture on you two the same time, Chris.
00:03:55
T-Bag
yeah right
00:03:55
Steve-O
um we We found out very soon that a lot of modern movies that are trash just get released to Netflix so they don't have but box offices.
00:03:56
delta slim
Fuck it.
00:04:03
T-Bag
right
00:04:04
dirtycheeks
Okay, well, that's that's okay that's fine.
00:04:06
delta slim
Do you know how many Steven Seagal movies were released in the last like four years on streaming only that we could add in here?
00:04:07
dirtycheeks
and I can watch them.
00:04:12
DeeBo
Thank you.
00:04:13
delta slim
Just saying.
00:04:13
dirtycheeks
I mean, i I do have two Wong Fu.
00:04:14
T-Bag
I mean, Bruce Willis movies too, right?
00:04:16
delta slim
Yeah.
00:04:19
dirtycheeks
Thank you for the memories on VHS if you ever...
00:04:21
delta slim
That's a good movie.
00:04:22
dirtycheeks
Okay, there you go. and they It'll never be on the list. It'll never be... That's fine.
00:04:28
T-Bag
Yep.
00:04:28
dirtycheeks
i'm not I'm not judging or saying anything against two Wong Fu.
00:04:30
T-Bag
Right.
00:04:32
dirtycheeks
I'm just saying i have that. i also have Malone, but if you guys are put that one of these
'Malone' Scene Humor
00:04:37
dirtycheeks
lists, I'm going hurt you.
00:04:37
delta slim
Wait, you think Malone's a bad movie?
00:04:39
dirtycheeks
No, I'm saying if any of you put that on the list, I would have some words with you.
00:04:41
delta slim
Oh, okay.
00:04:42
DeeBo
um
00:04:43
Steve-O
Oh, you're getting a mud hole stomped in you.
00:04:43
T-Bag
Yep.
00:04:45
dirtycheeks
Yeah, I mean, come on. I'm going to.
00:04:46
T-Bag
it that Is that the movie where he pretends to have a boner under a newspaper and it's a gun?
00:04:50
dirtycheeks
Yeah, it's fantastic.
00:04:50
Steve-O
Yup.
00:04:51
dirtycheeks
Yeah, I remember such a scene.
00:04:51
T-Bag
Okay. Yep. All right.
00:04:55
dirtycheeks
i mean, everybody looked at the
00:04:55
T-Bag
i and
Bracket System Explained
00:04:57
dirtycheeks
boner.
00:04:57
dirtycheeks
That's what he wanted people to do.
00:04:57
T-Bag
Right. he Yeah, that's why that scene always bothered me. It's like, how did he know that these two bumfuck yokels are going like, yeah, I want to see a dick.
00:05:07
T-Bag
Yeah.
00:05:08
dirtycheeks
Yeah, well, that's the thing. Like, it's a poor way to hide a gun, too, because everybody's going to look at a boner.
00:05:09
Steve-O
Hmm.
00:05:10
delta slim
but
00:05:13
dirtycheeks
Like, is he trying to hide it? But then again, it's a boner and then it's a gun. Anyway, guys, go see Malone.
00:05:18
T-Bag
Yeah, that's neither here nor there. I just wanted to make sure we established the rules because I personally felt like the rules really and cut my knees out from under me in a big way.
00:05:26
Steve-O
Well, hold on.
00:05:27
T-Bag
that's like
00:05:27
Steve-O
Say this is my first...
00:05:27
T-Bag
i couldn't pull out another I couldn't pull out another Legend of the Titanic this year.
00:05:32
Steve-O
you You tried to. You literally tried to pull out the sequel.
00:05:33
T-Bag
i really I really did, yeah.
00:05:34
delta slim
You really tried
00:05:36
dirtycheeks
Woof. Woof.
00:05:37
Steve-O
So...
00:05:37
T-Bag
It was that American rule that really got me.
00:05:40
Steve-O
What March badness is is, we make Chris watch a bunch of bad movies and then we do a tournament style bracket. And Chris goes through, compares the films that we have picked until he chooses the worst of the worst.
00:05:57
T-Bag
Yep.
00:05:58
dirtycheeks
Easy, really. And this year was the easiest year I've ever had,
00:06:00
delta slim
Yeah. though
First Bracket: 'The Disappointments Room' vs. 'The Apple'
00:06:03
dirtycheeks
by the way.
00:06:03
dirtycheeks
I want to point that out.
00:06:03
delta slim
So we're we're doing the same, right? In the in the matchup, you're going to pick what which movie is worse than the other movie.
00:06:09
DeeBo
Hmm.
00:06:10
T-Bag
Yep. And then that movie moves on.
00:06:11
delta slim
Okay. i think maybe one of these years, you know, since we're going to live forever and everything, is um maybe one one of these years, maybe we'll let Chris pick the better movie.
00:06:16
T-Bag
Yeah.
00:06:17
Steve-O
right
00:06:21
delta slim
I don't know. We'll we'll see.
00:06:22
Steve-O
you
00:06:22
delta slim
we'll play We'll play around with it.
00:06:24
DeeBo
in
00:06:24
Steve-O
We do a... I'm trying to think of a good version of this.
00:06:26
dirtycheeks
Well, you know, I think I did. I think last year i picked the best movie too, didn't I? The best of the worst?
00:06:32
delta slim
No.
00:06:32
dirtycheeks
No, I never did, huh?
00:06:34
delta slim
no I don't think so.
00:06:34
T-Bag
No, you didn't officially put a title on it, but you did say that your favorite of the movies you watched was A No Name Norm.
00:06:36
dirtycheeks
I mean, I did.
00:06:42
dirtycheeks
Yeah, it was.
00:06:43
T-Bag
yeah
00:06:44
delta slim
And that didn't win. That didn't win March Badness last year, right?
00:06:47
dirtycheeks
It sure didn't.
00:06:47
delta slim
No.
00:06:47
T-Bag
No.
00:06:48
dirtycheeks
It was my favorite. It was not the worst.
00:06:49
T-Bag
But I i technically won.
00:06:49
delta slim
It was tim him propaganda Tim's propaganda films that he finds and in the undergrounds so of...
00:06:50
DeeBo
Yeah.
00:06:52
T-Bag
Yeah, exactly. Right. Yeah, it was my North Korean animated movie that won Worst of the Worst.
00:06:57
delta slim
ah there Yeah.
00:06:58
dirtycheeks
yeah ah
00:06:59
T-Bag
But...
00:07:00
dirtycheeks
I forgot about that.
00:07:01
T-Bag
ah ah ah Yeah, last year I did happen to win both Worst Movie and Chris's Favorite Movie of the movies that he picked.
00:07:08
dirtycheeks
Thank you, Kim Jong-il for, for Tim's.
00:07:10
T-Bag
Yep. Well, in fairness, it was an Italian-North Korean joint product. Joint production.
00:07:17
dirtycheeks
What a combo.
00:07:19
T-Bag
but
00:07:20
dirtycheeks
Oh my God.
00:07:21
delta slim
Italian propaganda.
00:07:22
dirtycheeks
All right.
00:07:22
Steve-O
Thank you.
00:07:22
T-Bag
Yep.
00:07:23
dirtycheeks
So i have the brackets in front of me.
00:07:26
delta slim
Yeah, what how do you want to do it first?
00:07:26
dirtycheeks
Um,
00:07:27
delta slim
do you want to do it down the list?
00:07:29
dirtycheeks
Yeah, I'll just go down.
00:07:29
delta slim
and thenll i'll give you And then I'll update the brackets, send you the new bracket once you know for the next round and then the round after that.
00:07:35
dirtycheeks
Yeah.
00:07:35
T-Bag
Yeah, yeah, yeah, that works.
00:07:35
delta slim
Okay.
00:07:36
dirtycheeks
That's totally fair. i go I'll start at the very top, the top bracket, number one bracket. ah Two films on this list that are going up head-to-head.
00:07:48
dirtycheeks
The Disappointments Room and The Apple.
00:07:52
delta slim
this one This is the one I was curious about.
00:07:52
dirtycheeks
And i see i see names.
00:07:53
DeeBo
Thank you.
00:07:55
dirtycheeks
I do see names I'm in front of them.
00:07:56
delta slim
oh yeah, those are the ones. Yeah, I guess the that was maybe that's too much info.
00:08:00
dirtycheeks
No, I don't care.
00:08:01
T-Bag
Ah, it doesn't matter.
00:08:01
dirtycheeks
At this point, it's fine.
00:08:02
delta slim
Yeah, it doesn't matter. Yeah. So Tim picked the disappoint or Tim picked the Apple disappointments room with Steve.
00:08:03
dirtycheeks
At this point, fine.
00:08:07
T-Bag
Yep.
00:08:09
dirtycheeks
All right, well, um let's talk about The Disappointments Room, because that's the first movie on our list today. And I have chosen a word to describe each one of these movies.
00:08:16
delta slim
Here, I'll give you this too.
00:08:21
T-Bag
Ooh.
00:08:22
dirtycheeks
I consider, I don't want to say they're the eight cardinal sins of bad film, but they're bad movies.
00:08:27
DeeBo
Thank
00:08:30
dirtycheeks
things yeah There are adjectives that are bad. Okay. And I think each movie falls under a certain one. So for the disappointments room, the term I chose, the word I chose was forgettable.
00:08:48
delta slim
Hmm, okay.
00:08:48
T-Bag
Okay.
00:08:50
dirtycheeks
Directed by DJ Caruso and written by DJ Caruso.
00:08:54
delta slim
Hell yeah.
00:08:56
dirtycheeks
It holds a Rotten Tomatoes score of 0%.
00:08:59
T-Bag
Holy you shit.
00:08:59
DeeBo
you
00:09:00
T-Bag
Okay.
00:09:01
delta slim
Yeah, it's on there. i up updated the i upload
00:09:03
T-Bag
Hachi machi.
00:09:04
delta slim
I uploaded the the the table there. It's up there, 0%.
00:09:07
dirtycheeks
An audience score ah of 17%. Oh, man.
00:09:10
delta slim
Oh, it went down? It went down since I made this table?
00:09:13
dirtycheeks
oh man Oh, my
00:09:14
T-Bag
Wow.
00:09:14
delta slim
Because it was 18% month ago, Chris. ah month ago chris
00:09:17
DeeBo
ah Yeah, john John, Chris literally gave his rating, so it went down.
00:09:20
Steve-O
ah
00:09:22
delta slim
Oh, he rated it and himself?
00:09:22
DeeBo
He's like, ah...
00:09:23
dirtycheeks
Bing! One down on my audience score, baby.
00:09:26
delta slim
That's insane, though.
00:09:27
dirtycheeks
Not enough tits and ass. That's what I said. That was my description. um Box office, 5.7 million, budget 1.5. Or, I'm sorry, budget 15 million.
00:09:39
T-Bag
Wow.
00:09:39
delta slim
Yeah, i was going to say, I was going to say, man, at least it made ah i mean it made a a few mil.
00:09:39
dirtycheeks
Woo!
00:09:40
T-Bag
wow
00:09:40
Steve-O
That's right.
00:09:41
dirtycheeks
Excuse me.
00:09:44
delta slim
It's cool.
00:09:44
dirtycheeks
This was released in 2016 and has a runtime of 85 minutes. ah
00:09:50
DeeBo
Oh, that is short.
00:09:52
dirtycheeks
The film itself was inspired by an HGTV episode
00:09:57
T-Bag
What?
00:09:58
dirtycheeks
From a segment called If Walls Could Talk.
00:10:01
delta slim
Mmm.
00:10:02
dirtycheeks
um Basically the plot of the room, ah the plot of the room, pun intended, the plot of the movie, The Disappointments Room, is a young couple moves into a home after a traumatic event and they find this walled off door ah behind like a cabinet that's like boarded shut and they open it up and they find out that it's a room in which the care the person who built the home built this room to store their mentally ill children.
00:10:35
dirtycheeks
um And he would keep them in there alone, isolated to try to cure them. um Yeah, it it actually falls into that whole trope of the 2010s into the 2020s of there's somebody in the walls or there's a secret room in your house that's evil. Yeah.
00:10:56
T-Bag
Right, right.
00:10:57
dirtycheeks
um Very popular trope. And it just... It falls on its face every single time it tries to do anything.
00:11:04
DeeBo
you you
00:11:05
dirtycheeks
Like,
Second Bracket: 'The Last Airbender' vs. 'Lawnmower Man 2'
00:11:06
dirtycheeks
ah attempts to scare from those tropes. From jump scares that are, like, poorly timed. Like, they they don't...
00:11:15
T-Bag
ah
00:11:16
dirtycheeks
They don't line up right. Like, it's... It's it it's so...
00:11:19
T-Bag
I kind of love that, though.
00:11:22
dirtycheeks
And it's just so bland. Yeah. um of a movie, and up until the end, and the end specifically, you find out what the tragedy was young couple was suffering from, and it was that they're their child died.
00:11:37
dirtycheeks
And their child died because their mother fell asleep on top of it?
00:11:43
T-Bag
Okay.
00:11:45
dirtycheeks
And that's...
00:11:46
delta slim
What?
00:11:47
dirtycheeks
Yeah, she just like... she She lost consciousness, or she just would drift. randomly and she fell asleep on her child and it suffocated.
00:11:57
T-Bag
So, like, but
00:11:57
DeeBo
So it's like it's like how Christopher killed the cat in The Sopranos.
00:12:00
dirtycheeks
Yeah, exactly. But no heroin involved.
00:12:01
delta slim
What?
00:12:01
DeeBo
Yeah.
00:12:03
dirtycheeks
Like just, just you're just tired.
00:12:04
T-Bag
but... like But, like, that's...
00:12:05
DeeBo
Oh, really? Like, he have a substance abuse problem?
00:12:06
dirtycheeks
I'm tired.
00:12:08
DeeBo
He was just sleepy? Yeah.
00:12:10
dirtycheeks
I want to think that the goal, the message of this movie had something to with postpartum depression.
00:12:16
T-Bag
But like that is a thing that happens, right? There's like ah a fringe group of lunatics who keep their babies like in bed with them
00:12:18
dirtycheeks
Right.
00:12:24
delta slim
There's better movies that do that.
00:12:24
T-Bag
and a c
00:12:25
dirtycheeks
No, no, no, no, Tim.
00:12:26
T-Bag
and occasionally occasionally parents roll over on them and fall and like while asleep.
00:12:27
dirtycheeks
No, no. She didn't fall.
00:12:31
dirtycheeks
that's like That's a normal, not normal, but a terrifying thing that could possibly happen. No, no, no.
00:12:36
T-Bag
Sure, sure.
00:12:37
dirtycheeks
That's not what happened in the movie. She was sitting in a chair next to her child and she just like knelt on him to get comfortable and it died.
00:12:42
T-Bag
Uh-huh.
00:12:45
T-Bag
Okay. What?
00:12:49
delta slim
What?
00:12:50
dirtycheeks
fucking died, dog.
00:12:51
Steve-O
You
00:12:52
dirtycheeks
Yeah.
00:12:54
DeeBo
ah So Chris, howton how does this compare to the other ah famous infant death movie in Antichrist where the baby just walked out of the walks out the window?
00:12:55
T-Bag
What the fuck?
00:13:03
delta slim
Eraserhead. I thought going to say Eraserhead.
00:13:05
T-Bag
What the fuck?
00:13:05
dirtycheeks
Yeah, there's a long list.
00:13:05
Steve-O
Good.
00:13:07
delta slim
How does this compare to Eraserhead? How does this movie...
00:13:09
DeeBo
yeah Yeah, I guess so.
00:13:09
dirtycheeks
There's a long, disturbing list. oh This is far so far down on that list because of how ineffectual it was in the film.
00:13:18
DeeBo
Wait, so Chris, when you like saw the scene, were you just like, wait, what?
00:13:23
dirtycheeks
Yeah, yeah.
00:13:24
DeeBo
What?
00:13:25
dirtycheeks
It woke me up, honestly.
00:13:27
delta slim
Oh my god.
00:13:27
DeeBo
Got
00:13:28
dirtycheeks
Like, I was, like, the confusion was the only thing that made me pay attention to the movies.
00:13:33
T-Bag
Right.
00:13:33
DeeBo
you.
00:13:34
T-Bag
God.
00:13:35
dirtycheeks
Which is, like, fascinating that any movie can pull that off, ever. But, uh...
00:13:39
T-Bag
Can I ask a follow-up question? Did you rewind it to make sure that you saw what you thought you saw when you saw it?
00:13:43
dirtycheeks
Yeah. 100%. Yeah.
00:13:46
T-Bag
Okay. that That is the sign of a truly terrible movie, because if you can't illustrate what happened in the pivotal twist scene of your movie, clearly the first time to your audience you have done something very, very wrong.
00:13:58
Steve-O
you
00:14:01
dirtycheeks
it is It fails in every way, and it's not obviously not scary. And the reason I chose Forgettable is because i i like outside of me explaining it to you, watching the movie, totally different.
00:14:15
dirtycheeks
like I am elaborating a lot and adding a lot of flavor.
00:14:18
delta slim
So, for in the
00:14:20
dirtycheeks
The movie itself is not anything like that.
00:14:22
delta slim
with respect to how this tournament is run, is forgettable a good thing for the movie or a bad thing for the movie? like Or in other words, does it does a forgettable make it worse or does it make it better?
00:14:34
dirtycheeks
It's kind of I'd say in the mid ground, like it's the perfect middle for this.
00:14:38
delta slim
Okay. Okay.
00:14:39
T-Bag
okay
00:14:40
dirtycheeks
I would imagine like it's not offensively bad, but it's also, there's nothing bad.
00:14:42
delta slim
Okay.
00:14:46
DeeBo
Okay.
00:14:47
dirtycheeks
That's interesting.
00:14:48
delta slim
So you didn't get angry at this movie, watching this movie is what you're saying okay
00:14:50
dirtycheeks
No, no,
00:14:52
T-Bag
it's too and ah It's too inoffensive to get mad at it.
00:14:54
dirtycheeks
exactly. And it's so poorly like made.
00:14:57
delta slim
saying? Okay. bad that's bad for the tournament, then.
00:14:59
T-Bag
For the tournament, sure.
00:15:00
delta slim
Yeah, for the tournament.
00:15:00
dirtycheeks
it is bad for the tournament, right?
00:15:01
Steve-O
Mmm.
00:15:02
dirtycheeks
Because there isn't anything that really, it doesn't stand out in any way.
00:15:02
delta slim
Yeah.
00:15:05
delta slim
Right.
00:15:06
dirtycheeks
You know what I mean? Like it's very run, run of the mill, middle the road.
00:15:08
delta slim
now the Now the Apple, on the other hand, this is the one I was real curious about. curious about Because this is the loophole movie that Tim found.
00:15:17
dirtycheeks
So the,
00:15:21
delta slim
Where it's like, oh, it made $5 or whatever.
00:15:22
T-Bag
It made $467 something, right?
00:15:24
delta slim
um made
00:15:24
T-Bag
Yep.
00:15:25
delta slim
yeah it made...
00:15:26
T-Bag
Right.
00:15:26
delta slim
Yeah, 500. Yeah, the plane ticket it cost to fly the crew to the film festival Chicago is the box office.
00:15:32
T-Bag
yeah right
00:15:34
dirtycheeks
The budget of this movie $10 million. In 1980. $10 million. Please look that up.
00:15:36
Steve-O
Oh my god.
00:15:36
delta slim
That's insane!
00:15:37
DeeBo
Yeah.
00:15:37
Steve-O
1980.
00:15:38
dirtycheeks
Please.
00:15:39
T-Bag
yep
00:15:40
delta slim
And this is in 1980.
00:15:41
dirtycheeks
The word chose for the Apple.
00:15:42
Steve-O
nineteen eighty
00:15:42
dirtycheeks
Is weird.
00:15:43
delta slim
So that's a lot.
00:15:43
dirtycheeks
It is. Oh
00:15:44
delta slim
what What did you say? How much was that?
00:15:46
dirtycheeks
ten million dollars
00:15:47
delta slim
Alright, let me plug this into the inflation calculator here.
00:15:48
dirtycheeks
yeah please look that up please
00:15:50
delta slim
10 million 1980.
00:15:51
dirtycheeks
um the the word i chose for the apple
00:15:54
delta slim
it's like 41 million March 2025.
00:15:56
dirtycheeks
is weird
00:15:58
T-Bag
Yep, that's what I was shooting for.
00:16:00
dirtycheeks
it is
00:16:00
delta slim
Yeah. It's lot Lambos. march twenty twenty five
00:16:02
dirtycheeks
um my God, Jesus Christ.
00:16:05
T-Bag
That's a lot of money for this movie.
00:16:07
dirtycheeks
this is This is a weird, weird fucking movie, guys.
00:16:07
delta slim
yeah lot of lambbos
00:16:11
dirtycheeks
um
00:16:12
DeeBo
the trailer The trailer is for sure.
00:16:12
T-Bag
Oh, I know.
00:16:14
DeeBo
bizarre for sure
00:16:16
dirtycheeks
And it's funny because I actually found out after I watched it that there was an entire prologue that was completely cut out.
00:16:25
delta slim
That's awesome. That's so sick.
00:16:26
dirtycheeks
And I was like, when did that happen? Like, I was reading, and just like sometimes I'll bone up on Wikipedia, read the summary, and I'm like, woooo booh wait, what? And I'm like reading the first paragraph. I'm like, oh!
00:16:39
dirtycheeks
Like that, it hit me.
00:16:41
Steve-O
laughs
00:16:42
dirtycheeks
and I was like, I see what they were trying and do
00:16:43
T-Bag
Yeah.
00:16:46
T-Bag
Yep.
00:16:47
dirtycheeks
um So this was um this was directed by Minahem Golan and written by Minahem Golan. ah The film was also titled star rock.
00:16:58
dirtycheeks
And this is the deleted prologue. This is not going to make any fucking sense to any of you, but I'm going to explain what it is. um the The deleted prologue was named paradise day in the deleted scenes.
00:17:08
dirtycheeks
There were two musical numbers and it is revealed that Mr. Topps creates heaven and carves the first human Alfie out of rock, sending the main character to meet Bibby, the other main character of the film.
00:17:13
T-Bag
Yep.
00:17:16
T-Bag
Yep.
00:17:23
T-Bag
All of that context is super important for the movie to make any sense.
00:17:26
DeeBo
I go for it.
00:17:28
dirtycheeks
i
00:17:28
delta slim
but
00:17:29
T-Bag
Yeah.
00:17:30
dirtycheeks
I saw that.
00:17:31
delta slim
What?
00:17:31
dirtycheeks
I was like, ah why
00:17:32
T-Bag
oh
Third Bracket: 'Ballistic: Ecks vs. Sever' vs. 'Little Italy'
00:17:33
dirtycheeks
of course, of course.
00:17:35
T-Bag
Yep.
00:17:35
Steve-O
and
00:17:35
dirtycheeks
And it kind of made the movie a little less weird. But the fact that they cut that makes it weirder.
00:17:40
T-Bag
Yep.
00:17:41
dirtycheeks
Right? Like, why would you do that?
00:17:42
T-Bag
yeahp
00:17:44
dirtycheeks
I guess if you're an idiot and you had to cut down runtime and you're like, oh well, we cut the prologue.
00:17:49
T-Bag
But you had already spent $10 million on this piece of shit.
00:17:49
dirtycheeks
You have no idea what it
00:17:50
delta slim
No, but yeah at this point, yeah, you are yeah already spent 41 million Trump
00:17:54
DeeBo
like go
00:17:57
delta slim
trump dollars on this rub
00:17:58
T-Bag
Right.
00:17:59
dirtycheeks
Okay.
00:17:59
delta slim
So it's like, oh what matter or what what matter would it make?
00:18:00
dirtycheeks
Okay.
00:18:02
dirtycheeks
So.
00:18:02
T-Bag
So Chris, can you try to give me a brief plot summary of what happens in the Apple, please?
00:18:07
dirtycheeks
all right. So it's basically, if I'm really going to break it down, it's basically the story of Adam and Eve. Right.
00:18:14
dirtycheeks
And the, the, the company that's in it, they're called BIM, uh, which it stands for Boogaloo International Music.
00:18:14
T-Bag
Exactly correct.
00:18:23
delta slim
ah
00:18:23
T-Bag
Yep.
00:18:23
delta slim
Yep, that makes sense.
00:18:24
dirtycheeks
Satan is the CEO of said company. He is the CEO of Boogaloo.
00:18:28
dirtycheeks
That's the guy.
00:18:28
DeeBo
Obviously.
00:18:29
Steve-O
and
00:18:30
dirtycheeks
And he brings Bibi and Alfie in.
00:18:30
delta slim
has to be him
00:18:30
T-Bag
Yep.
00:18:33
dirtycheeks
they're They're musicians. And he's trying to get them, or he's he's bringing them in to make money off of them. And he notices in the first performance that they're pulling... like applause and likability away from the the big stars.
00:18:47
dirtycheeks
So he has to lower their audio. So the audience doesn't hear it. yeah He's actively hindering their careers because he wants his big stars. I forget their names, but they're dandy and Tandy.
00:18:56
T-Bag
I believe it was Dandy and Tandy.
00:18:59
dirtycheeks
Thank you.
00:19:00
T-Bag
No problem.
00:19:00
Steve-O
What are these names?
00:19:01
dirtycheeks
Yeah.
00:19:01
T-Bag
Don't worry about it.
00:19:02
T-Bag
Doesn't matter.
00:19:03
dirtycheeks
He wants, he saw them not succeeding.
00:19:04
T-Bag
Keep rolling.
00:19:06
dirtycheeks
He wants them to succeed. They make money. So in essence, as the movie plays out, Bibby starts and Alfie start being more popular. Bibby specifically starts gaining more fame and she gets seduced by Satan, by big Boogalow signs, a big contract with them, but Alfie refuses and he walks out and he's, you know, living in the street and in his shitty apartment with this weird woman who is his mother or is also attracted to him. It was fucking weird.
00:19:39
dirtycheeks
Um,
00:19:39
delta slim
Love it.
00:19:40
T-Bag
Little Oediple going on there, but yeah.
00:19:42
dirtycheeks
Oh, that's weird. Anyway.
00:19:43
delta slim
It's so brave. In 1980? Please. Who else? and nineteen eighty please
00:19:48
dirtycheeks
and
00:19:49
delta slim
who else
00:19:50
dirtycheeks
the second act shit, they're setting up the, the, the big moment, the big, the the, the, the falling out has happened moving into the third act. Alfie or Bibby starts to realize that she's literally signed a contract with Satan. Alfie comes to her rescue.
00:20:06
dirtycheeks
They run off into the, a park in New York. I think it was Central Park.
00:20:13
delta slim
Central Park?
00:20:13
T-Bag
Yep.
00:20:14
dirtycheeks
Yeah, pretty sure.
00:20:14
delta slim
Nice.
00:20:15
T-Bag
believe it was.
00:20:16
dirtycheeks
And they find all these bums living in like a cave in Central Park.
00:20:20
DeeBo
Oh, like ah like Halloween Resurrection ah or whatever which whatever Halloween movie that was.
00:20:20
T-Bag
hu
00:20:22
Steve-O
ah Oh, yeah. That
00:20:24
T-Bag
Yeah, kind of.
00:20:24
dirtycheeks
ah yeah so
00:20:27
Steve-O
was Halloween ends where Michael Myers gets his ass kicked.
00:20:28
DeeBo
Yeah, sorry.
00:20:29
dirtycheeks
And there's there's this big Santa looking motherfucker. I mean, he's huge, like jacked, not like fat. Um... And he's like their guide. And he says, we're a commune. Come live with us. Be perfect.
00:20:42
dirtycheeks
they have they It flashes forward like five years or something. They have a kid in this commune living in Central Park like a bunch of hobos. And Bugaloo shows back up and he's like, baby, you owe me $10 million dollars for your contract, walking out on your contract.
00:20:59
dirtycheeks
And just as the police show up and are about to round up all the hobos, Mr. Topps
00:21:05
T-Bag
Who is God?
00:21:06
dirtycheeks
who is God drives down in his Rolls Royce or Bentley from heaven and says, Alfie, baby, come back to me.
00:21:11
delta slim
Hell yeah.
00:21:13
DeeBo
Wait a minute.
00:21:13
delta slim
well
00:21:15
dirtycheeks
And they go, they actually, all the hobos file in the, to the Bentley and they drive off into heaven.
00:21:17
Steve-O
this
00:21:17
delta slim
um
00:21:21
T-Bag
Yep.
00:21:22
delta slim
This is so weird.
00:21:26
dirtycheeks
And that's your movie.
00:21:27
T-Bag
But, Chris, can you tell me, is it a natural, natural, natural desire to meet an actual, actual, actual vampire?
00:21:28
delta slim
Wow.
00:21:35
dirtycheeks
that's the thing because Tim, these, these songs were kind of catchy a little bit and I, they were kind of fun and,
00:21:40
T-Bag
they're fucking catchy as hell. I hate it They are.
00:21:44
delta slim
Oh, they were good. It was good.
00:21:45
T-Bag
They're good.
00:21:45
delta slim
Oh, man.
00:21:46
T-Bag
It's legitimately like as weird as the movie is that te you can see every one of those 10 million dollars on screen. Like but it's actually produced pretty well. It just doesn't make any sense.
00:21:56
T-Bag
It is the weirdest fucking thing I've ever seen.
00:21:57
dirtycheeks
well but, the, there is some scenes like there is a particular musical number that they're singing in like an auditorium. And it's just the sound is terrible.
00:22:07
dirtycheeks
Like it is, it is god awful.
00:22:07
T-Bag
True.
00:22:09
dirtycheeks
And they do repeat the same lyrics like over and over and over again.
00:22:12
T-Bag
Yes, yes, they do. You better like it because it's going to keep happening.
00:22:16
dirtycheeks
Like, like Bim Hour, that whole shit, which I thought was really kind of fun, but they just kept doing it like it was too much of a good thing, you know.
00:22:19
T-Bag
Yep.
00:22:26
T-Bag
The Apple is a an example of a good bad movie in that it's really... act like The first time you watch it, you're just like, I don't know what I'm looking at. I don't know how these decisions were made.
00:22:37
dirtycheeks
Yes.
00:22:38
Steve-O
Thank you.
00:22:38
T-Bag
i don It's like...
00:22:41
T-Bag
Making a movie is making a billion little decisions, and somehow they managed to make almost all of them wrong, but in a weirdly compelling way.
00:22:50
dirtycheeks
And it's crazy because this this director, he's like a big time producer. And this was one of his first films he ever directed. He tried to direct a Spider-Man movie before this.
00:23:02
dirtycheeks
And with this similar size budget. And I think this was his fallback plan.
00:23:07
T-Bag
Yep. Yep.
00:23:09
dirtycheeks
Which is crazy to me. I can't make Spider-Man, so I'm going to make this fucking weird BDSM musical.
00:23:13
delta slim
So I'm going to make this. Yeah.
00:23:15
DeeBo
Then they'll see.
00:23:16
dirtycheeks
Then they'll figure it out.
00:23:17
DeeBo
Yes.
00:23:17
T-Bag
Then they'll realize they screwed up when they didn't hire me to make Spider-Man.
00:23:18
delta slim
Yeah.
00:23:22
dirtycheeks
This guy also directed the Captain America film that was made in the 80s.
00:23:26
delta slim
Oh, the ah bad one?
00:23:27
T-Bag
Oh, with, uh, with, uh, with Rob Brown as the, uh, as Captain America, I believe.
00:23:27
DeeBo
and
00:23:28
Steve-O
Oh.
00:23:29
delta slim
That's sick. i like i you know what? I liked that movie. I liked it when I was a kid.
00:23:33
DeeBo
but He directed ah ah The Bad One. You mean Brave New World? Can I be honest?
00:23:37
dirtycheeks
Yeah. Menahem Golan directed Brave New World. You're absolutely right. I think it was him. um This, yeah. It holds up 27% on Rotten Tomatoes, an audience score of 47%.
00:23:46
delta slim
i
00:23:50
dirtycheeks
I forgot to point that out.
00:23:51
delta slim
I mean, that's higher that's higher than zero.
00:23:51
DeeBo
and i be on Can I be honest?
00:23:53
T-Bag
Yep.
00:23:54
delta slim
That's higher than zero, which is what disappointments are in.
00:23:54
T-Bag
it is It is higher than zero.
00:23:55
dirtycheeks
And I gotta say, fellas...
00:23:55
DeeBo
i mean I was worried. I was worried that this was going to be the one Chris really hated. like from my From what we had known, you know obviously because we talked about them, I was like, this might be it.
00:24:05
delta slim
Musicals, yeah.
00:24:06
T-Bag
Right.
00:24:07
DeeBo
This might be the one that kills Chris.
00:24:08
T-Bag
And we yeah, we had drafted specific categories and this was the one everyone was terrified of because I fought very hard to prove that it had an American box office release where it made $400 whatever.
00:24:09
dirtycheeks
No.
00:24:12
DeeBo
Yeah.
00:24:20
dirtycheeks
No.
00:24:21
DeeBo
Yeah.
00:24:22
T-Bag
Because John was really trying to box me out of picking the apple.
00:24:26
dirtycheeks
So out of these two, these two films, I have to go with the disappointments room as being worse.
00:24:26
delta slim
Hey, man.
00:24:30
T-Bag
Okay. Yeah. i
00:24:32
delta slim
All right.
00:24:32
T-Bag
Based on what you have described, i would it sounds like the apple is a more fun movie to watch than The Disappointments Room.
00:24:39
dirtycheeks
Yes, it is.
00:24:40
Steve-O
Oh, thank goodness. My plan worked. I had horror. I was sitting there and I said, oh wait, bad horror can be really fun sometimes.
00:24:49
dirtycheeks
yeah
00:24:50
Steve-O
But there's nothing worse than forgettable horror.
00:24:50
DeeBo
That's true, yeah.
00:24:53
delta slim
right.
00:24:53
dirtycheeks
One million percent, Steve. Couldn't said it better myself. There's one aspect of horror. If you you make it forgettable, you're done. It's the cardinal sin of horror, in my opinion. and There's no worse fate.
00:25:04
dirtycheeks
um Okay, so just point Disappointments Room moves on.
00:25:10
delta slim
Moves on.
00:25:11
T-Bag
All right. Congratulations, Steve.
00:25:13
Steve-O
Oh, thank you, Tim.
00:25:14
dirtycheeks
Steve moves on to the next round.
00:25:14
T-Bag
very welcome.
00:25:15
delta slim
No, job's not finished. Kobe.
00:25:17
dirtycheeks
Jobs are finished.
00:25:18
delta slim
Job's not finished, Steve's going say.
00:25:21
dirtycheeks
two Number two bracket, folks. Next one up. we have, contending against one another, The Last Airbender and Lawnmower Man 2, Job's ref Revenge.
00:25:26
T-Bag
Oh, God.
00:25:32
DeeBo
Man, he's using some hat.
00:25:32
Steve-O
This is fantasy versus sci-fi.
00:25:33
delta slim
Joe...
00:25:33
T-Bag
I do. I just want to raise my hand real quickly and say that when John locked in the last airbender, I started to feel bad about the exercise that is March badness.
00:25:35
dirtycheeks
All
00:25:43
T-Bag
I was like, oh, this is this is mean. Yep.
00:25:48
dirtycheeks
right, I gotta...
00:25:48
delta slim
this It's personal.
00:25:48
dirtycheeks
John...
00:25:49
delta slim
It was Cerebro. That was Cerebro. A Cerebro pic.
00:25:50
T-Bag
That was a Cerebro moment for sure.
00:25:51
dirtycheeks
ye john john
00:25:52
delta slim
Yeah.
00:25:53
dirtycheeks
i i This is interesting. this is um I believe it or not, this is this one might make...
00:25:58
delta slim
Believe it or actually like this movie now is what Chris is saying.
00:26:00
DeeBo
Thank you.
00:26:01
dirtycheeks
No.
00:26:01
delta slim
After a sixth watch, it's not that bad.
00:26:02
dirtycheeks
Well, let me and let me explain a little history about myself, ah which is connected to this movie, strangely enough.
00:26:07
delta slim
Okay.
00:26:10
dirtycheeks
ah When I got out of film school, actually when was going to film school, everybody was super pumped because End Night Shyamalan was building a soundstage on the Navy Yard.
00:26:17
delta slim
Thank
00:26:23
Steve-O
Mm-hmm.
00:26:24
dirtycheeks
And all my teachers were like, this is great. This is going to be like a big time thing for for all of you to to actually work on like a movie. It's a big budget movie. Nobody really knew exactly what it was at the time.
00:26:38
dirtycheeks
But we were kind of stoked, you know, because it was a paying job, you know, and film. And all of my friends, we all applied.
00:26:45
T-Bag
Yeah.
00:26:48
dirtycheeks
Like we all applied and we all got jobs on like And some got better jobs than others. and this this This movie paid my rent for like three months.
00:27:01
delta slim
We gotta separate the art from the artist, Chris, alright?
00:27:03
DeeBo
You
00:27:04
Steve-O
wait but Chris is the artist
00:27:07
dirtycheeks
I've got to admit to you something.
00:27:07
delta slim
Chris?
00:27:09
dirtycheeks
i was I had a hand in making this. I had a hand in making this.
00:27:15
Steve-O
Chris are you in the fucking credits of the last airbender movie
00:27:15
delta slim
God damn it!
00:27:18
dirtycheeks
I don't know. I don't know. i didn't look. I
00:27:22
delta slim
My powers are working against me, guys. This is not good.
00:27:25
dirtycheeks
i mean, I parked cars. I like, I got people coffee. I saw M night Shyamalan in his little golf cart that he drove around set. I found out that he gave a trip to one of the PAs to fucking Fiji, like a lottery.
00:27:40
dirtycheeks
Like I fucking loved him.
00:27:40
DeeBo
Damn. Great guy.
00:27:42
delta slim
Yeah, he's a good guy.
00:27:43
T-Bag
Yeah. Yeah.
00:27:43
delta slim
That doesn't mean he makes... but All his movies are amazing, right?
00:27:46
dirtycheeks
I understand that.
00:27:46
delta slim
so
00:27:47
dirtycheeks
I get it. But like, i had to I had to get that out there because there's i i there is a bias here. I can't like i can't sit here and say i i truly hate this because I fucking made it.
00:28:01
dirtycheeks
I was part of the process of making it.
00:28:02
DeeBo
yeah
00:28:04
dirtycheeks
And that's where this... that's This is the interesting part of Galani and Chill in my opinion because like I have to talk about a movie which I know is bad. like Deep down, like it is a horrendous, boring, poorly...
00:28:17
delta slim
Yeah, can we talk about the other aspect of this, about how much you love the the animated series, Chris?
00:28:19
dirtycheeks
poorly...
00:28:22
dirtycheeks
I fucking love this animated series so much.
00:28:23
delta slim
Okay, can we go, can we pivot to that?
00:28:26
dirtycheeks
I love it.
00:28:26
delta slim
not Not free trips to Fiji and and jobs for people in Philadelphia.
00:28:26
dirtycheeks
And this...
00:28:27
DeeBo
Yeah.
00:28:29
Steve-O
you
00:28:31
delta slim
Let's talk about how much you love the animated series. How about we pivot to that a little bit?
00:28:36
dirtycheeks
All right, so the word I chose for for The Last Airbender is forced. um And that was this was the word that i This was the hardest word I had to choose.
00:28:42
DeeBo
yeah
00:28:42
T-Bag
okay
00:28:45
delta slim
Did they force the actors to pronounce the names wrong? it Is that what you mean?
00:28:50
dirtycheeks
Well, I feel like everything about this movie is just, it's it was put upon people. Like, M. Night Shyamalan, I felt like, was really pressured to make a big budget blockbuster.
00:29:02
delta slim
you think is he Is he a fan of the show at all? like or or no? like did Did he watch the show?
00:29:06
dirtycheeks
he he said He said his daughters watched it, and he watched I'm assuming he watched it with them, and he really did like it.
00:29:11
delta slim
I mean, my... My son watches a lot of paw Patrol.
00:29:15
DeeBo
Thank you.
00:29:16
delta slim
Does that mean I'd make a really good Paw Patrol movie? I don't think so.
00:29:19
dirtycheeks
No, not at all. I mean, no, no, no, no. no and And the fact that, like, well, I'll get into with this film, the fact that there was so much pushback against the co-creators of the show, like the original animated series. Like, they had no say in the writing process of the film.
00:29:38
dirtycheeks
And the project was given go-ahead without their approval. They met with M. Night Shyamalan once. and they voiced concerns about some of the directions he was going because he was cutting out a lot of humor as he used the term because he thought it was childish.
00:29:54
dirtycheeks
Um, specifically with Soka, like, I feel like if any character was assassinated the most in this adaptation, it was Soka. Um, which, you know, under, I don't want to say I understand where he's coming from because I really don't, but,
00:30:11
dirtycheeks
I guess he was trying to make it more of like a mass market appeal versus Sokka being kind of, i mean, Sokka's kind of sexist. That's kind of his thing, but he learns from that. Like that's a and very important part of his character. he goes from being a sexist idiot to being like a strategic mastermind who cares about everybody.
00:30:30
dirtycheeks
Like that's his whole fucking arc.
00:30:31
T-Bag
That's kind of like his whole arc, isn't it?
00:30:32
Steve-O
Yeah.
00:30:33
dirtycheeks
And it's also, i get the idea that it was incredibly hard to focus on that in the first book. Because that's all that is, or at least most it is adapted.
00:30:41
DeeBo
Yeah, because Soka's just a shitty guy in the in book one.
00:30:45
dirtycheeks
Exactly. Exactly. So it's like, ah it's, it felt like Hen Knight was trying to dance around some things when he should have just maybe gone full tilt and just adapted the fucking show properly.
00:31:00
dirtycheeks
And um yeah, I mean, he's definitely at fault. I feel like he's the drider. He's the drider. the director writer of this film. So it's the, the buck stops there.
00:31:12
dirtycheeks
um Many have criticized the screenplay, the acting, the direction, the casting, dialogue, the action scenes, the plot holes, the unfaithfulness of the source material, the characters and the 3d conversion.
00:31:24
dirtycheeks
But I worked on it. God damn it. And it paid my rent. That's honestly, ah, the took out,
00:31:33
DeeBo
Coward. Coward.
00:31:34
Steve-O
and
00:31:36
dirtycheeks
I took out all the humor and life to appease the MPA, as I said, to make it more...
00:31:41
Steve-O
you did that that was your job
00:31:42
dirtycheeks
Yeah, it was me.
00:31:43
T-Bag
Yep.
00:31:43
Steve-O
yeah
00:31:43
dirtycheeks
I did it. I cut his character out of the movie.
00:31:46
Steve-O
yeah
00:31:46
dirtycheeks
I made him an asshole.
00:31:47
Steve-O
we're getting rid of the koshu warriors we don't need that fucking story arc wow wow he's like don't worry chris i'll take this hit for you
00:31:49
dirtycheeks
And he he... Steve, he was such a good guy, he took credit for that.
00:31:54
DeeBo
Coward.
00:31:55
dirtycheeks
That's what i mean. That's what mean. All
00:31:56
DeeBo
good
00:31:59
dirtycheeks
all right, so here's the interesting parts of this movie. um The only interesting parts. Not this. Rotten Tomatoes score 5%. Obvious. Audience score 30%.
00:32:10
dirtycheeks
What? um
00:32:11
delta slim
It's universally hated by, by you know, everybody everybody hates this movie, yeah
00:32:14
T-Bag
Everyone.
00:32:15
Steve-O
Uh-huh.
00:32:15
dirtycheeks
Everybody. Everybody. um Though, it had a budget of $150 million. and Some of that one in my pocket.
00:32:25
DeeBo
ah how How many mil, Craig?
00:32:26
T-Bag
Get that bag.
00:32:27
DeeBo
How many mil? Like two?
00:32:28
dirtycheeks
I got two.
00:32:28
DeeBo
How much did you make?
00:32:29
dirtycheeks
i got two in a parking car and getting coffee.
00:32:30
DeeBo
Yeah, you got two.
00:32:30
delta slim
yeah. Yeah, like two-man.
00:32:33
dirtycheeks
I got two milk.
00:32:33
delta slim
You got a bag? You got a bag, Chris?
00:32:35
DeeBo
Can you get it back, Craig?
00:32:35
delta slim
You got bag from it?
00:32:35
dirtycheeks
yeah but And then the box office, though, $319 million. So it.
00:32:43
delta slim
That means it's a good movie, right? If a lot of people saw it.
00:32:45
DeeBo
I think...
00:32:45
T-Bag
yeah
00:32:45
DeeBo
Wait, wait. To be fair, to be fair, of all of these movies, far and away the most in terms of the March badness,
00:32:55
dirtycheeks
Most what? Most money made?
00:32:56
DeeBo
ah Most money made, yeah.
00:32:56
dirtycheeks
Yeah, definitely.
00:32:58
Steve-O
Most successful.
00:32:58
dirtycheeks
100%.
00:32:58
DeeBo
Yeah. So whatever metric you want to smack of that one, yeah.
00:32:59
dirtycheeks
Easily and the most successful. Like out of the ones I have.
00:33:03
delta slim
Wow, Devin. You're just gonna fucking shoot...
00:33:06
T-Bag
ah
00:33:08
delta slim
You're just gonna shoot that angle over here?
00:33:08
DeeBo
Just saying.
00:33:09
delta slim
You're gonna fucking bullseye it? bull's eye ah mean...
00:33:11
dirtycheeks
ah
00:33:12
T-Bag
I mean, he does have a point.
00:33:14
dirtycheeks
Listen, it was 2010. Everybody was seeing everything.
00:33:18
delta slim
I guess Avatar is the greatest film ever made.
00:33:19
dirtycheeks
ah have you That's true.
00:33:21
delta slim
The original Avatar.
00:33:23
T-Bag
I've been saying that for years.
00:33:26
dirtycheeks
and a runtime of 103 minutes, though, you felt everyone. yeah felt You felt everyone.
00:33:31
dirtycheeks
um
00:33:31
delta slim
They pronounced the names wrong.
00:33:32
DeeBo
Thank you.
00:33:33
dirtycheeks
They pronounce every name wrong.
00:33:34
T-Bag
and That's pretty egregious though, right?
00:33:34
dirtycheeks
The acting...
00:33:37
delta slim
Like.
00:33:37
dirtycheeks
The acting is so atrociously bad, guys. It is some of the worst acting out of this list.
00:33:41
delta slim
Dude, it turned it it turned Dev Patel off from making movies like for a while.
00:33:46
Steve-O
Yeah.
00:33:46
delta slim
Like he. like it like It traumatized his career. like he said And now he doesn't want he doesn't want to do big budget AAA movies anymore. He doesn't want to be you know yeah want to be in and those parts of those movies anymore because of this.
00:34:00
dirtycheeks
I totally understand that.
00:34:00
Steve-O
Yeah. Hiwazuka, right?
00:34:02
dirtycheeks
was Uz. Yeah, it was Zuko.
00:34:03
Steve-O
Ah, dude.
00:34:04
dirtycheeks
Yeah.
00:34:05
Steve-O
That, like... What a wonderful character and such a shame.
00:34:07
DeeBo
Onizuko, dude. Yeah.
00:34:09
Steve-O
Such a shame.
00:34:10
dirtycheeks
And he was really given it.
00:34:10
delta slim
And a wonderful actor! and A wonderful actor, too!
00:34:12
Steve-O
Wonderful actor playing a wonderful character.
00:34:12
T-Bag
Yep.
00:34:14
Steve-O
Like there's so much you can do with
00:34:14
dirtycheeks
He was serving.
00:34:15
delta slim
And they couldn't they couldn't get it.
00:34:15
dirtycheeks
He was.
00:34:16
delta slim
And they couldn't nail it, huh?
00:34:17
dirtycheeks
He was serving real hard in that too. He was given it. At least some life.
00:34:21
delta slim
Man, that sucks, man.
00:34:22
dirtycheeks
And they yeah. Everybody else around him is is atrociously bad.
00:34:26
delta slim
And then they didn't even show his hog in The Green Knight, even though they said they were.
00:34:26
dirtycheeks
It's shocking.
00:34:28
T-Bag
yeah
00:34:29
DeeBo
That's why he's like, no, ever sent Avatar. I can't do it.
00:34:34
Steve-O
You're M-knighting me again. What the hell?
00:34:36
DeeBo
Thank
00:34:36
dirtycheeks
All right, folks, we'll move on to the next film in this category, and that is Lawnmower Man 2, Job's Revenge.
00:34:43
delta slim
Lawnmower man.
00:34:46
delta slim
Get up off of my lawn. Wait, so there's this has like a couple different titles I've seen.
00:34:46
Steve-O
Mm-hmm.
00:34:50
dirtycheeks
Job's War. Excuse me, Job's War.
00:34:52
delta slim
what's It's Job's War or it's like so Cyber, what was the other one?
00:34:55
dirtycheeks
Beyond Cyberspace.
00:34:57
delta slim
Beyond Cyberspace. Why are there, do you, is there a reasoning why there's two different names?
00:35:02
dirtycheeks
Because when they were trying to shop this movie around, they had to change the name for a foreign market.
00:35:03
delta slim
um
00:35:07
dirtycheeks
So I think Beyond Cyberspace is the French title.
00:35:11
delta slim
Oh, that, like I see that and I'm like, I gotta see that movie.
00:35:15
dirtycheeks
I think it's better.
00:35:15
delta slim
I see Job's War.
00:35:15
dirtycheeks
Yeah.
00:35:16
delta slim
I see Job's War, and I'm like, ew, this is weird. Oh, you think of Job?
00:35:20
Steve-O
I think of Arrested Development.
00:35:20
DeeBo
Yeah.
00:35:21
Steve-O
I can't help it, man.
00:35:23
T-Bag
Yes.
00:35:23
Steve-O
really That is GOV, yeah.
00:35:23
delta slim
No, that's G-O-B, though.
00:35:24
T-Bag
Joe Bluth.
00:35:25
delta slim
Isn't that G-O-B?
00:35:26
T-Bag
It is George Oscar Bluth.
00:35:27
Steve-O
I hear it, though. I hear it.
00:35:31
dirtycheeks
It's just as stupid. oh i The word I chose for Lawnmower Man 2, Job's War, or Beyond Cyberspace was cheap.
00:35:34
delta slim
oh my God.
00:35:41
dirtycheeks
This film... and Now, listen. I'm going to give you the budget here.
00:35:44
delta slim
Cheap as in budget? Cheap?
00:35:46
dirtycheeks
I'm going to give you the budget here. It's $15 million. But it didn't look like that at all.
00:35:51
T-Bag
Hmm.
00:35:52
dirtycheeks
It had... It cheaped. It cut every fucking corner you could possibly imagine for a sci-fi movie.
00:35:58
delta slim
Hell yeah.
00:36:00
dirtycheeks
It felt like somebody was embezzling this budget.
00:36:03
DeeBo
what you want, dude.
00:36:03
dirtycheeks
They weren't actually
00:36:03
delta slim
It felt like somebody was somebody was project manager-ing this this movie.
00:36:04
DeeBo
Yeah, dude.
00:36:08
dirtycheeks
putting it. Yeah, 100%. Like from the sets to the 3D animation, which they use a lot of, and it looks fucking terrible.
00:36:17
delta slim
ah yeah You've seen the original Lawnmower Man, right?
00:36:19
dirtycheeks
Yeah, and that doesn't look much better, but it's better than this.
00:36:22
delta slim
but it's a good But it's a good movie, right? Isn't that like a good movie?
00:36:24
dirtycheeks
Oh, what? it's It's a better movie than this. 100%.
00:36:28
dirtycheeks
I was going to say way better, and I was like, let me check myself there.
00:36:28
DeeBo
Yeah.
00:36:29
delta slim
Okay.
00:36:34
dirtycheeks
Slow down there. ah Yeah, it's a better movie than this by far. Partially because Job's not really in it much.
00:36:42
delta slim
Did Stephen King write the story for the second one too? Or no?
00:36:45
dirtycheeks
I don't think so. um don't think so.
00:36:47
delta slim
Because he didn't he didn't he he did the first one?
00:36:49
dirtycheeks
I think it was his his his fake name. Like, it's not real. He...
00:36:53
T-Bag
richard Richard Bachman?
00:36:54
delta slim
Richard Bachman.
00:36:54
dirtycheeks
Richard Bachman wrote, I'm pretty sure he wrote Lawn Mower Man, well, his persona, whatever, because he knew they're going to adapt this and they're going to make it into a shitty sequel called Job's War.
00:37:02
DeeBo
It's ridiculous. Oh, and
00:37:04
delta slim
was it better than john Was it better than Johnny Mnemonic? Was it better than Johnny Mnemonic?
00:37:08
dirtycheeks
No! No!
00:37:11
T-Bag
look That's quite a reaction.
00:37:12
delta slim
He's so offended.
00:37:13
T-Bag
Holy shit.
00:37:14
DeeBo
it, dude.
00:37:14
delta slim
He's so offended. You love Johnny Mnemonic.
00:37:15
DeeBo
ah ended
00:37:16
dirtycheeks
I like it way more than this.
00:37:16
delta slim
Shit.
00:37:18
Steve-O
Johnny Mnemonic got a recent black and white edition that people are like calling masterful yeah they no they're they're like like wow the visuals of this movie was supposed to be in black and white like we did this movie a disservice by putting it in color
00:37:20
dirtycheeks
And it's great.
00:37:22
delta slim
Kurosawa? Kurosawa Edition? Kurosawa, dude. Oh, man. That'd be sick.
00:37:32
dirtycheeks
The acting is better in Johnny Mnemonic. The acting is better in the first Lawnmower Man. like Pierce Brosnan. Oh yeah, it was fun story. so Pierce Brosnan passed on this like a big asshole because he had to do this fucking movie called Golden Eye or something.
00:37:45
delta slim
Oh, God.
00:37:45
dirtycheeks
What a dumbass.
00:37:46
Steve-O
ah
00:37:47
delta slim
Yeah, what a dumb bitch.
00:37:47
dirtycheeks
um
00:37:47
T-Bag
God.
00:37:48
delta slim
What a dumb bitch.
00:37:48
dirtycheeks
Dumb asshole.
00:37:50
T-Bag
So stuck up.
00:37:53
delta slim
What a dumb ass bitch.
00:37:55
dirtycheeks
Lawn Mower Man had been New Line Cinema's highest grossing theatrical release of 1992. And a sequel had been initially advertised with the title Lawn Mower Man 2, Mindfire.
00:38:06
DeeBo
Yeah.
00:38:06
dirtycheeks
The 1993 VHS release of the first film. So they were like, bro, we got a sequel, baby. This is franchise.
00:38:13
DeeBo
Yeah, this is a franchise.
00:38:15
Steve-O
going to buy this tape.
00:38:16
dirtycheeks
You bought that tape, you're like, oh shit, yeah, Lawn Mower Man 2, my boy.
00:38:19
Steve-O
That must have blown your mind. Like what?
00:38:22
dirtycheeks
Yo, that quick? was sequel?
00:38:25
Steve-O
I just saw the movie because I didn't see it in theaters.
00:38:25
dirtycheeks
one
00:38:29
dirtycheeks
I bought out all the porn that I picked up from this weird shop. um So he, you know, whatever. ah Original director was too busy directing virtuosity to focus on this film and he left.
00:38:42
DeeBo
Yo, I love Virtuosity, by the way. that movie fucking rules.
00:38:46
T-Bag
ah
00:38:47
DeeBo
Denzel, Russell Crowe?
00:38:47
dirtycheeks
So like the original director was was was agreeing with you, Devin.
00:38:50
DeeBo
Hell yeah.
00:38:52
dirtycheeks
They agree with you 100%.
00:38:52
DeeBo
Yeah.
00:38:55
DeeBo
Mike Superior film.
00:38:58
dirtycheeks
And the person who picked up the ball after my man, my virtuosity boy dropped it was Farhad Man. he both direct
00:39:07
Steve-O
um sorry, who?
00:39:07
dirtycheeks
He directed it. Farhad Man.
00:39:08
Steve-O
Forehead men?
00:39:10
T-Bag
Forehead band.
00:39:10
dirtycheeks
Farhad
00:39:10
T-Bag
Yeah.
00:39:11
Steve-O
Forehead men, tell me more.
00:39:12
DeeBo
Warheadman.
00:39:13
dirtycheeks
Man. Yes, might be made up. um Yeah, maybe it is.
00:39:20
DeeBo
Made up a racist.
00:39:21
dirtycheeks
It was...
00:39:21
DeeBo
That's the new game we're playing.
00:39:26
dirtycheeks
ah my my my My main film... So this this is basically a Terminator 2 ripoff. In every way, shape, or form. um
00:39:35
delta slim
Oh, man.
00:39:37
dirtycheeks
The young character, the child from the first movie.
00:39:37
delta slim
But, like...
00:39:40
delta slim
Does that offend you that it rips off of Terminator 2 and does such a bad job, too?
00:39:45
dirtycheeks
Yeah.
00:39:45
delta slim
Like, does it pain you to say that?
00:39:46
dirtycheeks
Yeah. Wonderful.
00:39:48
delta slim
To even say that? Like, put them in the same fucking sentence together?
00:39:51
dirtycheeks
yeah
00:39:52
delta slim
The same conceivable thought together?
00:39:52
dirtycheeks
one Yeah, John!
00:39:55
delta slim
That's crazy.
00:39:55
dirtycheeks
I agree 100%.
00:39:56
DeeBo
no
00:39:56
delta slim
Okay.
00:39:57
dirtycheeks
Yeah, dude.
00:39:58
delta slim
Oh, man! Is this the one that he hates, Devin? Oh, shit. He's gonna be riding a lawnmower, man, too, to the moon here?
00:40:04
DeeBo
to
00:40:05
T-Bag
Yep.
00:40:05
delta slim
Shit.
00:40:06
dirtycheeks
John, this one really...
00:40:06
Steve-O
to the moon.
00:40:06
DeeBo
Right into the final thing.
00:40:07
dirtycheeks
This one bugged me quite a bit. This is the first one I watched, by the way, too.
00:40:11
DeeBo
Oh, oh, oh. I see you were like, oh.
00:40:12
dirtycheeks
Which is weird.
00:40:12
T-Bag
Oh, wow.
00:40:13
delta slim
It's the first one and he's fucking soaking in it.
00:40:14
dirtycheeks
Yeah. Dude.
00:40:17
delta slim
He's been soaking in it the whole time. Oh my god.
00:40:19
dirtycheeks
Motherfucker, I was like, oh man, this this is gonna be rough.
00:40:21
delta slim
Just give Devin the trophy now. Fuck.
00:40:23
dirtycheeks
This is going to be rough. I like said that out loud after watching the first Lawn Merman 2. The internet is a series of pipes in Lawn Merman 2.
00:40:34
dirtycheeks
When they go into the virtual world, they're going through pipes.
00:40:36
delta slim
I mean, is that not how it is now?
00:40:38
T-Bag
Yeah, it makes sense.
00:40:38
DeeBo
I should be like a Ralph.
00:40:38
delta slim
I'm sorry.
00:40:39
DeeBo
Yeah, yeah.
00:40:39
delta slim
I'm sorry.
00:40:40
dirtycheeks
Everybody's saying jacking in, is which I just...
00:40:42
DeeBo
Yeah, dude.
00:40:43
dirtycheeks
um
00:40:44
DeeBo
Johnny Mnemonic. He says jack in, right?
00:40:46
dirtycheeks
Yeah, I know.
00:40:46
Steve-O
You jack into the matrix.
00:40:47
DeeBo
I need to jack in.
00:40:48
dirtycheeks
just...
00:40:48
delta slim
jacking it off?
00:40:49
dirtycheeks
It's just the amount of times people say it in the movie.
00:40:50
delta slim
They don't say that?
00:40:52
dirtycheeks
It just it starts to rub you the wrong way.
00:40:53
DeeBo
yeah That's the concerning part.
00:40:55
dirtycheeks
Pun intended.
00:40:55
DeeBo
Yeah,
00:40:56
delta slim
They're trying to force the the the issue in the and the zeitgeist there. They're trying to make people say jacked in.
00:41:00
dirtycheeks
one what i
00:41:02
DeeBo
yeah. Trying to make the text happen here.
00:41:04
dirtycheeks
here's Here's a little little foresight in the movie. ah The VR devices in the movie are called iPhones. 1996, folks.
00:41:11
delta slim
They're called...
00:41:11
DeeBo
Whoa!
00:41:12
delta slim
o Wait, really?
00:41:12
T-Bag
whoa
00:41:13
Steve-O
Yeah.
00:41:15
dirtycheeks
1996.
00:41:17
dirtycheeks
Audience actually looks like, oh yeah. So when they cut to the 3D version, um basically Job is consolidating power. He's collecting everybody in the VR world to suck their life essence and become like this God, basically.
00:41:32
DeeBo
You know, wait, do we do we need a quick recap Lawnmower Man 1? Does this make sense?
00:41:37
dirtycheeks
Nope.
00:41:37
T-Bag
now no
00:41:38
dirtycheeks
Nope.
00:41:39
DeeBo
I don't know? Okay.
00:41:40
dirtycheeks
Well, I won't, the only recap you'll need is Job survived Lawnmower Man 1 because he was like a desiccated husk of a corpse in the first movie.
00:41:44
DeeBo
Yeah.
00:41:50
dirtycheeks
And the only thing that happened is he lost his legs. So he's just, he never, did you laugh at that?
00:41:54
DeeBo
Sorry.
00:41:58
DeeBo
I don't know why that made me laugh.
00:42:00
dirtycheeks
He just, he never moves. Like he's always in this little, little chair. and But when he's in the VR space, obviously he's full bodied and wearing this goofy costume that looks really cheap. um Yeah, audience in that 3D realm looks like they are jacking it during the VR tech demo that is Job's cult.
00:42:22
dirtycheeks
Because it does look like like he's Steve Jobs a little bit sometimes. This is weird.
00:42:26
DeeBo
Yeah.
00:42:27
dirtycheeks
There's a lot of weird connections to Apple and Job in this movie.
00:42:34
dirtycheeks
I don't think they planned it. Like, I think it's just coincidental to be honest.
00:42:39
DeeBo
Don't think it was Steve Jobs' favorite movie?
00:42:39
dirtycheeks
Um, uh, maybe
00:42:41
DeeBo
He's like, yes, I get it. see what they're doing.
00:42:46
dirtycheeks
this was a, uh, yeah, I said 1996, 93 minutes, a budget of 15 million box office 2.4. So total bomb. rotten tomato score of 18% and audience score of 12. an audience score of twelve And out of these two, the film that moves on for being worse is lawnmower man to Joe's war.
00:43:06
DeeBo
Hmm. Yeah. Take that riding mower all the way to the finals, baby.
00:43:15
dirtycheeks
All right. So we're moving on to bracket three. Um, good Lord.
00:43:19
T-Bag
Yes. oh god
00:43:22
dirtycheeks
This is, um, this is rough. Um,
00:43:25
DeeBo
Yeah.
00:43:26
dirtycheeks
Ballistics X versus Sever. Or Ballistic X versus Sever.
00:43:28
delta slim
Hell yeah.
00:43:32
DeeBo
Mmm.
00:43:33
dirtycheeks
And Little Italy.
00:43:37
dirtycheeks
Little Italy. So... I'll have to see where this is on my list.
00:43:44
Steve-O
this is a action versus romance i believe with the genres drafted by um tim and john
00:43:45
dirtycheeks
um my god.
00:43:48
T-Bag
yes
00:43:50
T-Bag
Yes, I believe that is correct.
00:43:52
dirtycheeks
Without giving... Without giving too much away, these two films are neck and neck on my list.
00:43:54
T-Bag
Yes.
00:43:59
dirtycheeks
Like, they're back to back.
00:43:59
Steve-O
oh
00:43:59
T-Bag
oof Okay.
00:43:59
DeeBo
Mmm. o
00:44:00
dirtycheeks
So, wherever they are, I'm not going to tell you who's over one or you know what's worse, but we'll get into it eventually.
00:44:05
T-Bag
Sure.
00:44:08
dirtycheeks
So, first is Ballistics X vs.
00:44:10
DeeBo
Is it?
00:44:11
dirtycheeks
Sever. And the word I would use to describe this film is boring.
00:44:19
dirtycheeks
This probably... One of, if not the most boring action film I have ever watched in my entire life. It is...
00:44:28
delta slim
is the most boring film that you watched on this list.
00:44:32
dirtycheeks
Yes, definitely, hands down.
00:44:33
delta slim
Wow. Okay.
00:44:34
Steve-O
But it's a it's a video game adaptation, Chris.
00:44:34
delta slim
All right.
00:44:37
DeeBo
isn
00:44:38
dirtycheeks
Yeah. Yeah, it is isn't it? um i Did I have to play the game?
00:44:42
T-Bag
Is
00:44:42
dirtycheeks
Did I have to play the game?
00:44:44
Steve-O
The Game Boy Advance game X versus Sever.
00:44:46
dirtycheeks
Did I have to play it?
00:44:46
T-Bag
I thought came out at the same time. see.
00:44:49
DeeBo
I thought that was a movie-based game.
00:44:49
Steve-O
Well, I think it was supposed to be a movie based game, but I think the game came out too far ahead.
00:44:56
T-Bag
i say
00:44:57
Steve-O
So it just kind of came out and then the movie came out like maybe like a year later or something.
00:45:02
dirtycheeks
I think nobody bought the game and then nobody saw the movie. I'm like, I don't know what order, but...
00:45:07
DeeBo
I mean, I will say I've always been fascinated by like... the the boldness of the title, like ballistic, like we're supposed to know what ballistic is.
00:45:17
DeeBo
And then also X and sever. I'm like, Oh, these you must be important people.
00:45:20
dirtycheeks
You know why you had that reaction, Devin? Because it's a terrible title to market to anyone.
00:45:23
DeeBo
Yeah.
00:45:26
DeeBo
you
00:45:27
delta slim
Yeah, what about Claire claire Obscura Expedition 33?
00:45:28
T-Bag
ily
00:45:31
delta slim
What about that, Devin?
00:45:32
dirtycheeks
that's not any better. I'm
00:45:34
delta slim
And it's an amazing game, from what I hear.
00:45:37
dirtycheeks
sure. But like, like as, as, as,
00:45:37
T-Bag
It is very good.
00:45:40
delta slim
What about Re-Fantasio Metamorpho, or whatever the fuck that is.
00:45:44
T-Bag
Metaphor re-fantasio.
00:45:44
DeeBo
Thank you.
00:45:44
Steve-O
yeah
00:45:45
delta slim
Whatever the fuck that is.
00:45:46
dirtycheeks
as my, guys, as, as my uncle said about the term charcuterie and how great it is, they're killing themselves with that name.
00:45:46
Steve-O
What about Lawnmower Man 2?
00:45:48
Steve-O
Job's Revenge.
00:45:49
delta slim
Dope's War.
00:45:50
Steve-O
Oh, that's... Ha
00:45:58
dirtycheeks
That's kind of,
00:45:59
Steve-O
ha ha ha ha!
00:46:00
dirtycheeks
what what this is. That's what this is.
00:46:03
delta slim
What's a better name? Like meat and cheese board? Like, is that what you say?
00:46:06
Steve-O
Meatboard.
00:46:07
dirtycheeks
I guess. Like, that's just, it gets to the point.
00:46:09
delta slim
At least it's to the point. Yeah, at least it's up front.
00:46:10
dirtycheeks
You right?
00:46:11
delta slim
It's front and center.
00:46:12
Steve-O
Back in my day, we called these cold cuts.
00:46:12
delta slim
It's right there.
00:46:15
dirtycheeks
Yeah, that's basically what it is. Gobble Google or some shit. Um, guys, you know directed this movie?
00:46:22
T-Bag
I don't actually.
00:46:22
Steve-O
Who?
00:46:23
dirtycheeks
Chaos!
00:46:24
Steve-O
Whoa! Just the idea?
00:46:25
dirtycheeks
Chaos!
00:46:26
Steve-O
the concept?
00:46:27
dirtycheeks
I'm his name!
00:46:28
delta slim
ah
00:46:28
DeeBo
Final Fantasy 1 villain?
00:46:28
dirtycheeks
I'm
00:46:29
delta slim
It's with a K, right?
00:46:29
DeeBo
Yeah.
00:46:30
delta slim
Isn't it with a K too?
00:46:30
DeeBo
Yeah.
00:46:30
Steve-O
Ugh!
00:46:30
dirtycheeks
With a K! With a K!
00:46:33
delta slim
Hell yeah.
00:46:35
T-Bag
Now I understand why that guy from that Final Fantasy game was so willing to kill Chaos.
00:46:39
DeeBo
yeah
00:46:39
dirtycheeks
Dude, i would I want to now. I agree with him 100%.
00:46:41
delta slim
Ballistic X
00:46:42
dirtycheeks
Chaos needs to die. This movie... Wow.
00:46:46
Steve-O
Directed by Chaos.
00:46:47
dirtycheeks
It almost felt like...
00:46:49
delta slim
They got a couple of goats in there, though. You got Lucy Liu, you got Antonio Banderas.
00:46:51
dirtycheeks
Dude... I fucking know.
00:46:53
delta slim
Come on.
00:46:54
dirtycheeks
That's the craziest fucking part about this movie.
00:46:55
delta slim
You know?
00:46:56
dirtycheeks
Like you you have good actors, but you don't give them the most lines. Instead, you give all the lines to fucking the, the who's the guy that played, um, but you give all the lines to Ray fucking park.
00:47:07
DeeBo
Ray Park, Darth Maul.
00:47:09
T-Bag
Yeah.
00:47:10
delta slim
The Toad? You give him the Toad?
00:47:12
dirtycheeks
They, but he has more lines in this movie than Lucy Liu.
00:47:13
delta slim
all people? Darth Maul? Darth Toad?
00:47:18
Steve-O
I love the idea.
00:47:18
delta slim
You give all the lines of Darth Toad?
00:47:19
Steve-O
ray Ray Park, who didn't talk in Star Wars, barely talked in X-Men.
00:47:24
delta slim
Didn't talk in X-Men.
00:47:25
T-Bag
yeah yeah
00:47:26
Steve-O
He went up to the director. He went up to Chaos and said, Hey, can I fucking talk in this one? Hey, can get a line in this movie? And, ka my boy, will you?
00:47:32
DeeBo
I got some sick lines, like why yeah
00:47:34
dirtycheeks
Anything is possible with chaos.
00:47:37
DeeBo
yeah
00:47:37
dirtycheeks
That's what he said.
00:47:37
Steve-O
hey Take Antonio's lines. He doesn't need them.
00:47:41
dirtycheeks
yeah and Let me tell you about Antonio Banderas in this film. Every fucking line he delivers is in whisper. It is annoying as fuck.
00:47:51
dirtycheeks
That is...
00:47:51
Steve-O
He's saving his voice for Spy Kids. Come on, man.
00:47:55
dirtycheeks
i don't know why he's whispering so much. Maybe he has... some sort of hearing disorder or he made a bet to somebody that he could whisper throughout an entire film production.
00:48:07
Steve-O
They were filming at the director's parents' house.
00:48:10
dirtycheeks
Like, I don't, and Lucy Liu is, is mute in the film practically.
00:48:12
DeeBo
Chris, is is is Lucy Liu X or Sever?
00:48:18
dirtycheeks
So Lucy Liu is sever X is Antonio Bondara.
00:48:18
delta slim
She's Sever.
00:48:19
DeeBo
Oh, okay. Bandalis. Bandalis.
00:48:24
dirtycheeks
And, you know,
00:48:24
delta slim
X vs Sever.
00:48:26
dirtycheeks
They give so many opportunities to both X and Sever to be the most badass people in this fucking movie.
00:48:33
delta slim
x versusever
00:48:34
dirtycheeks
The direction, the editing, and overall, like, the blocking is just so goofy.
00:48:35
Steve-O
Thank
00:48:40
dirtycheeks
And they just, they know it. So everything's in slow-mo. Like, they they fucked this movie up and they had they were recovering in post. That's what kind of what feels like. watching it.
00:48:51
dirtycheeks
And if you put everything in slow-mo, it just, after a while, like 15 minutes, solid slow-mo, you just lose interest.
00:48:56
DeeBo
Thank you.
00:48:59
dirtycheeks
And was just bored out of my fucking gourd. Because they also would cut out all like the gunfight, the gunfire. So there's no like dynamic sound to it at all. like it's It's like a muted action movie with the dumbest fucking plot.
00:49:17
dirtycheeks
Like a convoluted, dumb fucking plot ah about Antonio Benares trying to find his daughter that Lucy Liu has and always had. But she he thought she was dead in a car bombing with his wife.
00:49:33
dirtycheeks
But like the fucking thing is they're talking about his wife if dying in a car bombing and then it cuts to a scene of a car bombing, but it's not a flashback. It's another fucking car bombing.
00:49:44
DeeBo
Oh my God.
00:49:44
dirtycheeks
Like what, what am I supposed to make of this?
00:49:45
T-Bag
ah
00:49:48
dirtycheeks
Like I was like, Oh, this is flashback. Oh no, it's a different car. Like this is in the future. What the fuck? Like it's so stupid. And so just convoluted. And after a while I just stopped paying attention to the plot and I,
00:50:01
DeeBo
yeah
00:50:02
dirtycheeks
You know, most action movies you can kind of fall back and just let the action roll over you. No, I was just like, no, this is boring too. Like, oh, great. Like, back to back. I have no solace in this.
00:50:15
dirtycheeks
um This is the worst reviewed film in the history of Rotten Tomatoes.
00:50:21
Steve-O
Jeez Louise, hold on.
00:50:22
delta slim
Yeah, I wasn't going to...
00:50:22
dirtycheeks
Yeah.
00:50:23
T-Bag
Oh,
00:50:23
delta slim
I was going to go with a different movie than this, but I needed to put this one in here for science because I read that it's the worst worse reviewed movie in history.
00:50:34
dirtycheeks
I get that. I get that. I, this came out in 2002, had a runtime in 91 minutes. The budget was 70 million and the box office was 20 million.
00:50:44
T-Bag
God. Oh, God.
00:50:46
dirtycheeks
Um, the screenplay goes back to 1986, uh, with the screenwriter, Alan B.
00:50:46
T-Bag
That's...
00:50:53
dirtycheeks
McCroy title Legion, his production company went bankrupt.
00:50:57
delta slim
Way better name, by the way.
00:50:58
dirtycheeks
And at, I know i fucking know.
00:51:01
dirtycheeks
And after
00:51:01
Steve-O
Well, come on.
00:51:02
Steve-O
Maybe Chaos was showing a little respect to Exorcist
00:51:04
delta slim
Ballistic.
00:51:05
T-Bag
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
00:51:06
delta slim
X versus Sever.
00:51:08
dirtycheeks
um His production company went bankrupt and after a few uncredited rewrites, we have this piece of shit. um Chaos was removed from post.
00:51:17
DeeBo
ah
00:51:17
delta slim
Chaos this is fucking dead.
00:51:17
DeeBo
Well, they lock chaos out of the editing room, dude.
00:51:19
dirtycheeks
They walked him out of the editing room.
00:51:20
delta slim
Uh...
00:51:22
T-Bag
They took it away from him.
00:51:23
dirtycheeks
The reason I said that so stuntedly is because I read it very tiny. and i was like
00:51:27
Steve-O
yeah
00:51:27
dirtycheeks
But I wrote chaos real big, so I know. It's like,
00:51:30
Steve-O
Chaos.
00:51:30
dirtycheeks
It is all over my notes. This is funny. um Chaos said the budget was only $35 million and was fraudulently inflated by the by the producer. So, Chaos has got some... Maybe he's got some receipts?
00:51:44
Steve-O
Without chaos, you won't have kinema.
00:51:44
dirtycheeks
Chaos?
00:51:44
DeeBo
but
00:51:46
dirtycheeks
You want to get them Pure Keno Chaos is coming.
00:51:50
Steve-O
You're keen of chaos!
00:51:52
dirtycheeks
He's coming, baby.
00:51:54
T-Bag
Release the chaos cut, you know?
00:51:56
dirtycheeks
At one point, Chaos wanted Wesley Snipes and Jet Li.
00:51:57
Steve-O
Hell yeah.
00:52:00
dirtycheeks
then Sly Stallone and Vin Diesel, then Chow Yun-Fat and Sean Renaud, then we got this.
00:52:00
DeeBo
Oh, that's a better movie.
00:52:09
dirtycheeks
um And not to say Lucy Liu and Antonio Banderas are bad.
00:52:10
delta slim
Hell yeah.
00:52:13
dirtycheeks
like They're both really good actors. like it's just
00:52:16
T-Bag
Absolutely.
00:52:17
dirtycheeks
This movie is atrociously bad. And to Lucy Liu's credit, she does look like a fucking badass in a lot of these scenes. She's really trying. Yeah.
00:52:28
dirtycheeks
And like she's the one part of this that I think is remotely watchable. um it's like Her scenes, which she does have a few, are are kind of like the most fun action in the movie.
00:52:41
delta slim
They team up right? They do the the old switcheroo on us and they team them up.
00:52:45
dirtycheeks
For about five fucking minutes!
00:52:45
Steve-O
Versus.
00:52:48
dirtycheeks
And then it ends!
00:52:49
DeeBo
Yeah.
00:52:50
T-Bag
oh
00:52:51
dirtycheeks
Yeah. There's not a lot...
00:52:52
delta slim
You gotta set it up for the sequel, man. You know?
00:52:56
Steve-O
Ballistic XN server.
00:52:57
dirtycheeks
this movie has This movie has no fucking juice. Like, none.
00:53:01
DeeBo
yeah
00:53:02
dirtycheeks
And it shows with every fucking scene and with the bad actors that have to deliver these terrible lines and not giving Lucy Liu more lines. Wow, I can go on forever. Like, it's just...
00:53:12
T-Bag
It lost 50 million dollars.
00:53:12
Steve-O
And this is like prime Lucy Lou too. You're not supposed to do that.
00:53:16
T-Bag
That's a that's a megaton bomb.
00:53:17
DeeBo
Yeah, that's a faux pas in the film industry.
00:53:21
dirtycheeks
You know what's funny, Tim?
00:53:21
DeeBo
lose that much money.
00:53:22
dirtycheeks
now Nowadays with, like, the bad bombs, like, that doesn't even faze me anymore.
00:53:26
T-Bag
Yeah, I guess that's true.
00:53:27
dirtycheeks
because they're
00:53:28
T-Bag
But I guess I'm curious.
00:53:29
dirtycheeks
There are movies that come out, they're like, they lost $120 million.
00:53:32
T-Bag
Yeah, that's definitely true. It was unheard of in 2002, though.
00:53:36
dirtycheeks
You're absolutely right. that this the These type of movies were bankable back in 2002. Triple
00:53:42
Steve-O
This is Prime, Triple X, Fast and Furious, Gone in 60 Seconds era movie making.
00:53:45
T-Bag
Yeah. Yep.
00:53:48
delta slim
Triple X, triple E C K S. Is that what you mean?
00:53:51
T-Bag
Yep.
00:53:51
Steve-O
You should.
00:53:51
T-Bag
Yep.
00:53:52
Steve-O
you that's Dude, that's probably what the trilogy should have been finished with.
00:53:56
delta slim
Oh man. X, X, X.
00:53:58
dirtycheeks
And I think the sad part about all this, I think in any, in a competent director's hands, this would have been a pretty decent movie.
00:54:03
Steve-O
Hmm.
00:54:05
dirtycheeks
Like it, it, I think it has the, I wouldn't say the bones, but it has like potential. And I guess maybe that's what makes it kind of worse in that regard, because it's like, oh, I see where you could have done this and you didn't.
00:54:22
dirtycheeks
And you're just, I, it's easy to blame the director in this movie. It's like the easiest thing in the world.
00:54:26
DeeBo
Yeah. You know, speaking of, i thought when you said his name was chaos that it was like, Oh, this is pseudonym. Like for, you know, like one those movies that just like everybody gave up on it.
00:54:37
delta slim
Chaos.
00:54:38
T-Bag
Oh, like an Alan Smithy kind of deal?
00:54:38
DeeBo
But no, this is, yeah, this is a Thailand born director named which chaos. And
00:54:46
delta slim
Don't even try it, though.
00:54:47
DeeBo
I did nailed it.
00:54:48
delta slim
It's fine.
00:54:48
T-Bag
so
00:54:49
dirtycheeks
That's why he went with Chaos, I guess.
00:54:51
DeeBo
Yeah. Yeah.
00:54:52
dirtycheeks
yeah
00:54:52
DeeBo
He's like, it's easier to say.
00:54:53
Steve-O
It's sick shorthand.
00:54:54
DeeBo
Um,
00:54:55
dirtycheeks
It is.
00:54:56
DeeBo
You know, dude, he got ah he got a Tekken movie out of this, though.
00:54:56
delta slim
Chaos.
00:55:00
Steve-O
and we all saw that.
00:55:01
delta slim
um
00:55:01
T-Bag
Oh, yeah.
00:55:01
DeeBo
Yeah, we all saw Tekken Cosmute Revenge.
00:55:01
delta slim
Yeah, no this very the very successful Tekken movie.
00:55:01
dirtycheeks
i remember one!
00:55:02
T-Bag
Yeah.
00:55:06
DeeBo
Yeah.
00:55:06
delta slim
Best video game adaptation of all time.
00:55:07
DeeBo
That we all didn't just find out about three seconds ago, yeah.
00:55:13
DeeBo
Okay, I'm
00:55:13
dirtycheeks
Alright folks. um Ballistics. that moves on We move on to our next next opponent in our bracket. And that's Little Italy.
00:55:23
dirtycheeks
The movie, the term, the word I use to describe this movie is cheesy.
00:55:29
T-Bag
yeah
00:55:30
DeeBo
Yeah.
00:55:34
dirtycheeks
Uh-huh.
00:55:36
DeeBo
Yeah.
00:55:36
T-Bag
Oh, is that a pun, Chris?
00:55:38
dirtycheeks
I don't
00:55:39
T-Bag
Is that a pun?
00:55:39
Steve-O
Oh, it's...
00:55:40
T-Bag
Is that a pun because it's about it's about rival pizza restaurants?
00:55:41
delta slim
Oh, man. i think and think chris my like I think Chris might like this movie. I think he might like it.
00:55:46
dirtycheeks
uh john you'd be wrong true
00:55:48
Steve-O
I mean, I always remember going over Chris's. There is that big Hayden Christensen poster on the wall.
00:55:51
delta slim
Little Italy, baby.
00:55:53
dirtycheeks
i'm gonna be honest watching this movie have there is a movie that um the the stella boys made years ago all right but it's uh and then they came together i think it's what it's called
00:56:01
DeeBo
Yeah. yeah well
00:56:02
T-Bag
I know exactly what you're talking about.
00:56:07
Steve-O
yeah
00:56:07
T-Bag
Yep.
00:56:08
dirtycheeks
And it's a total like satire of romantic comedies, like rips them to shreds, like with some of like the darkest, weirdest humor you could ever imagine.
00:56:20
dirtycheeks
Now, I want you to take all the dark, weird, like Paul Rudd making out with his grandma, like all that. Take that out of that movie. Take out some of the weird lines, too.
00:56:33
dirtycheeks
And that's Little Italy.
00:56:37
Steve-O
Thank
00:56:37
dirtycheeks
It feels, every moment of this movie feels like a satire.
00:56:44
dirtycheeks
It is incredible.
00:56:45
T-Bag
But it's played totally straight, which is the thing that is horrifying about it.
00:56:48
dirtycheeks
Totally straight. Totally straight.
00:56:51
T-Bag
Yes, absolutely.
Exploring 'Little Italy'
00:56:52
dirtycheeks
Every fucking stereotype you can think of in a romantic comedy is in this fucking movie.
00:57:00
T-Bag
a lot of stereotypes that aren't generally in romantic comedies.
00:57:03
dirtycheeks
Yeah, racial stereotypes.
00:57:05
T-Bag
Yes, lot of those.
00:57:05
dirtycheeks
Which... Art, a lot of 80s romantic comedies.
00:57:09
T-Bag
Yeah, I guess that's true.
00:57:12
dirtycheeks
But good lord, like it lays on racial stereotypes, romantic comedy stereotypes, um stereotypes about New York, stereotypes about Canada.
00:57:23
dirtycheeks
weird Weird ones, like there's a little Italy in Canada. That...
00:57:23
DeeBo
Good.
00:57:28
delta slim
There has to be somewhere, right? There's got to be a little Italy italy somewhere there.
00:57:29
dirtycheeks
I guess... Maybe...
00:57:33
T-Bag
Probably in Toronto or something, right?
00:57:34
dirtycheeks
Maybe. There has to be, right? I guess that is something I need to get around. But it is kind of weird, I have to admit. And the plot of the film is there are rival pizzerias. Well, first, there are pizzerias.
00:57:48
dirtycheeks
These two guys, they work together. and they make the best pizza because the one guy does the sauce, the other guy does the dough.
00:57:54
DeeBo
Okay.
00:57:54
dirtycheeks
And they got this thing going.
00:57:56
DeeBo
I'm locked in so far.
00:57:57
Steve-O
Mac and Manco origin story right here.
00:57:59
delta slim
yeah
00:58:00
dirtycheeks
There's a schism. They separate, they open up separate pizzerias.
00:58:02
DeeBo
Okay.
00:58:04
T-Bag
Thank you.
00:58:05
dirtycheeks
Their kids grow up. They won the, the girl, she goes off to culinary school, the daughter of one of them. The other one stays in little Italy and Toronto.
00:58:16
dirtycheeks
Um, and she comes back to see, you know, her father and her family that, uh, like,
00:58:22
delta slim
I think I've seen the end of this movie on TV at some point.
00:58:26
Steve-O
I believe Drew Gooden did a video on this movie.
00:58:30
dirtycheeks
Oh, man. Yeah, these are the types of movies that people should do more videos about because it's fascinating that they were made.
00:58:34
delta slim
This sounds like a way worse version of Big Night, one of my favorite movies ever.
00:58:34
Steve-O
Hmm.
00:58:38
dirtycheeks
One, John, one million percent, yes. Like, it's the corniest, cheesiest dialogue with some of the worst acting.
00:58:41
T-Bag
No.
00:58:45
delta slim
Do they have a 10 minute one shot that transcends film at the end at the end of this movie?
00:58:46
dirtycheeks
Oh, my God. Uh...
00:58:51
delta slim
Like bit like big like Big Night does?
00:58:52
T-Bag
No, ah they don't.
00:58:53
dirtycheeks
a
00:58:54
delta slim
No?
00:58:54
dirtycheeks
No, no. You know what they have?
00:58:55
delta slim
They don't? Dang!
00:58:56
dirtycheeks
They have that scene in every fucking romantic comedy where the guy runs off into the airport to try to get the girl back.
00:59:00
T-Bag
Yep. 100%.
00:59:01
dirtycheeks
That's what this fucking movie has, which people actively make fun of now as being the the fucking stereotypical ending of romantic comedies.
00:59:01
delta slim
Damn it.
00:59:01
T-Bag
hundred percent
00:59:10
dirtycheeks
I don't... I don't know. And this was made in 2018! 2018! Yeah! Yeah!
00:59:14
T-Bag
Yes, it was.
00:59:16
dirtycheeks
twenty eighteen
00:59:16
delta slim
So this is after Big Night was made, and they still couldn't get right.
00:59:19
DeeBo
after Transcendent... Wait. yeah after that transc ended wait is it big like weii so is ig Night is big night spelled like
00:59:20
T-Bag
Yep.
00:59:20
delta slim
Devin, have you seen that movie? Devin, watch that movie this week, please. That's your homework.
00:59:23
T-Bag
Yeah, watch Little Italy.
00:59:25
delta slim
No, no, don't watch Little oily Watch Big Night.
00:59:26
Steve-O
I watch both.
00:59:26
dirtycheeks
Yeah, go watch a Little Italy.
00:59:27
delta slim
Watch Big Night.
00:59:27
dirtycheeks
Go watch but Little Italy.
00:59:28
delta slim
No,
00:59:29
T-Bag
don't
00:59:30
dirtycheeks
It's Daniel's final film.
00:59:31
delta slim
no, no. No,
00:59:32
dirtycheeks
Go watch Little Italy.
00:59:35
delta slim
don't. This is...
00:59:35
T-Bag
Yeah, Chris, how did you feel about the subplot where Danny Aiello and, ah oh god, what is her name, Angela Martin, are trying to, are fucking like behind everybody's back?
00:59:42
dirtycheeks
Yeah. Yeah, that's great.
00:59:45
delta slim
would you say little Would you say Little Italy ruined Hayden Christensen's career, or was it Star Wars?
00:59:46
dirtycheeks
That's great.
00:59:50
DeeBo
ah
00:59:52
dirtycheeks
Little Italy helped.
00:59:53
T-Bag
Yeah.
00:59:54
dirtycheeks
Little Italy helped a lot.
00:59:54
DeeBo
What?
00:59:54
T-Bag
Yeah.
00:59:55
Steve-O
hmm
00:59:57
DeeBo
No, I think that's all he could get after Star Wars.
00:59:59
dirtycheeks
Well, actually, John, let me let me clarify. I think Little Italy was his attempt at a comeback or at least something.
01:00:05
delta slim
Uh, something.
01:00:05
dirtycheeks
And man, that didn't work.
01:00:07
delta slim
like at least Like, at least try to like gain some sex appeal. You know, maybe he'll be a pretty boy actor like Zac Efron.
01:00:12
DeeBo
Isn't there... that not to Not to be that guy, but isn't there like a pretty intense age difference between Emma Roberts and Hayden Grisham too?
01:00:16
delta slim
That kind of thing.
01:00:16
T-Bag
hello
01:00:22
dirtycheeks
No shit, really?
01:00:24
DeeBo
I don't, like, he's...
01:00:24
delta slim
Let me look it up.
01:00:24
T-Bag
I don't know.
01:00:25
delta slim
Let's look it up.
01:00:25
T-Bag
Yeah, let's look it up.
01:00:25
DeeBo
Yeah, look it up.
01:00:25
delta slim
Let's look it up. Let's look it up.
01:00:27
DeeBo
Emma Roberts.
01:00:27
delta slim
Emma Roberts currently 34 years old.
01:00:28
dirtycheeks
Whoa. I didn't even look that up, dude.
01:00:31
delta slim
Emma Roberts and Hayden Christensen
01:00:35
Steve-O
Definitely for s
01:00:35
delta slim
is is 85 years old.
01:00:37
Steve-O
Oh my god.
01:00:37
dirtycheeks
yeah
01:00:38
delta slim
So yeah, I would say
01:00:38
DeeBo
Okay, not crazy.
01:00:39
T-Bag
Oh, wow. I'm only 10 years.
01:00:39
delta slim
No, he's 44 years old. and then It's only 10 years.
01:00:41
DeeBo
Not crazy.
01:00:41
delta slim
not that It's not crazy. yeah yeah's not we're not like bill we're not bill belichick We're not Bill Belichick levels right now.
01:00:43
dirtycheeks
Yeah, only 10 years is like the okay in movies.
01:00:44
T-Bag
Uh,
01:00:46
dirtycheeks
Yeah.
01:00:47
Steve-O
No, no, no. But wait, wait, wait.
01:00:48
T-Bag
Yeah,
01:00:48
Steve-O
In 2018. In 2018, where are we?
01:00:52
delta slim
2018, he would have been...
01:00:55
dirtycheeks
she would have been in her late twenties.
01:00:55
delta slim
Oh, good fucking gracious.
01:00:57
dirtycheeks
Right.
01:00:57
delta slim
Seven years ago. So he he would have 37. She would have been 27. Not really that big of a deal, right?
01:01:02
Steve-O
okay
01:01:03
dirtycheeks
Yeah.
01:01:03
T-Bag
yeah it's not crazy.
01:01:04
dirtycheeks
Yeah.
01:01:05
T-Bag
ah Chris, how how did you like the scene where the Italian dads go to an Indian restaurant and they're upset that food that isn't Italian food exists and that people seem to like it?
01:01:14
dirtycheeks
Oh, don't worry.
01:01:14
delta slim
Wow, that's pretty horrible.
01:01:15
dirtycheeks
There's, they had, they, they got this shitty Italian comedian to do a tight five the whole time they were there.
01:01:15
DeeBo
Mm-hmm.
01:01:21
Steve-O
you
01:01:22
dirtycheeks
So it was it was great.
01:01:23
delta slim
Oh.
01:01:23
dirtycheeks
Let me tell you, he was on point with all his comparisons.
01:01:23
delta slim
ah ah
01:01:26
T-Bag
Chris, how did you feel about the scene where Hayden Christensen gets sexually assaulted by a cop in front of everyone and she grabs his dick and talks about how firm his dick is and then grabs his ass and it's like, wow, this is a nice ass.
01:01:40
dirtycheeks
This is This is So you understand where I'm like, this could have been a satire easily if they just like winked a few times at the camera.
01:01:40
T-Bag
And it's fucking horrifying and has no place in a romantic comedy.
01:01:49
dirtycheeks
like It is...
01:01:49
T-Bag
Nope.
01:01:50
dirtycheeks
Laying it on so fucking thick.
01:01:53
Steve-O
Chris, this is our people's big fat Greek wedding.
01:01:54
dirtycheeks
It's unbelievable.
01:01:57
T-Bag
Yeah. so i was I will admit I was 100% angle shooting with this pick.
01:02:02
dirtycheeks
It's, it's, yeah. And it's just, it's frustrating to watch like, right, well, here's the big, this is the big news. but Let's, let's, let's look
01:02:09
Steve-O
That you also worked on this movie.
01:02:12
dirtycheeks
but
01:02:12
DeeBo
Oh, it's
01:02:13
delta slim
a
01:02:13
dirtycheeks
it up. Toronto.
01:02:14
delta slim
Oh my god.
01:02:15
dirtycheeks
I worked in little Italy. Um,
01:02:19
dirtycheeks
um This has a Rotten Tomatoes score of 13%, but an audience score of 66%. They
01:02:27
delta slim
It's the Emma Roberts.
01:02:27
T-Bag
People love romantic comedies, man.
01:02:27
DeeBo
a cute movie.
01:02:28
delta slim
It's the Emma Roberts clan.
01:02:30
dirtycheeks
a sure do.
01:02:30
delta slim
It's the Emma Roberts clan, dude. They're they're psychos, man. They love her
01:02:33
dirtycheeks
It is the highest audience score of any of the movies on this list.
01:02:37
T-Bag
Yes, it is. And it's one of the literally one of the worst movies I've ever seen in my life.
01:02:39
delta slim
her.
01:02:41
delta slim
Chris, are there any, like,
01:02:41
dirtycheeks
Mm-hmm.
01:02:43
delta slim
Is there any, like, sexy scenes in this movie that, you know... Maybe that...
01:02:47
dirtycheeks
The only sexy scenes happen with two elderly people. One of them, Danny Aiello, which I don't want to see.
01:02:51
T-Bag
Yep.
01:02:54
dirtycheeks
I'm sorry. I love the man, but I don't want to see them smooching and laying in bed with one another. food
01:03:02
T-Bag
John, if you want sex appeal, there is a scene where ah Emma Roberts wakes up after getting extraordinarily drunk the night before in pajamas that she doesn't recognize in Hayden Christensen's bed and two separate men enter the room to imply that she's been sexually assaulted overnight.
01:03:15
delta slim
That's not sexy. that's That's not sexy.
01:03:19
T-Bag
first it's the ah First, it's the gay stereotype ah Asian man.
01:03:19
dirtycheeks
No, first...
01:03:20
delta slim
Him.
01:03:25
T-Bag
And then it's Hayden Christensen himself comes in and implies that he took advantage of her while she was too drunk to do anything.
01:03:31
delta slim
Jesus Christ.
01:03:32
dirtycheeks
Oh, and by the way, this gay stereotype Asian character is pretending to be Italian the entire movie.
01:03:33
delta slim
Oh my God.
01:03:38
T-Bag
Yes.
01:03:39
DeeBo
Thank you.
01:03:39
T-Bag
Well, because because apparently all the Asians in his life were really mean to him when he came out, but the Italians really accepted his homosexuality.
01:03:40
Steve-O
Thank
01:03:49
dirtycheeks
Which is pure fantasy.
01:03:49
delta slim
And...
01:03:49
T-Bag
but
01:03:54
dirtycheeks
Pure fantasy.
01:03:55
T-Bag
I mean, I hate to put that fine point on it, but feels a little disingenuous to lots of people's, I'm assuming, lived experience. Sure.
01:04:04
dirtycheeks
After the film's trailer was released, people thought it was a practical joke. When the film was confirmed real, it was widely mocked on social media. Some of the worst culture... I mean, there's nothing about this movie either. I couldn't find a single fucking thing.
01:04:17
dirtycheeks
like It wants to not exist.
01:04:19
T-Bag
Yes, it seems like everyone involved is deeply embarrassed of it and tried to make it go away as soon as possible.
01:04:20
delta slim
Thank
01:04:25
dirtycheeks
Directed by Donald P. P. Thierre and written by Steve Galluccio.
01:04:30
DeeBo
Can say
01:04:31
dirtycheeks
Galluccio? Ugh.
01:04:35
T-Bag
Well, Steve Galluccio, he wrote what he knew, right?
01:04:35
DeeBo
can i say
01:04:37
T-Bag
and what he knew was Italian stereotypes, apparently.
01:04:37
dirtycheeks
Oh, my God.
01:04:39
DeeBo
yeah
01:04:40
Steve-O
Mm-hmm.
01:04:40
DeeBo
Can I say i was i was curious about this one because I was like, I don't know what this one's about. so I YouTube it. Trailer. Trailer 2 comes up. Trailer 2 of Little Italy is just them just on a date and I'm waiting for like the plot or just something to tell me what this movie's about.
01:04:59
DeeBo
Where it's like they're on this date, they're swapping shirts and then they like leave ah a basket of bread to some Italian man and then like light a smoke bomb or something and wake him up and then they drive off and I'm like, wait, what's the plot of, and then the trailer ends.
01:05:06
T-Bag
Thank you.
01:05:15
T-Bag
yeah
01:05:15
DeeBo
That's the whole trailer.
01:05:17
dirtycheeks
oh yeah no I'll field that one though um so when they were children they would bother this elderly man with firecrackers so they were like oh let's do it again when we're older
01:05:20
DeeBo
Oh, thanks. Thanks. and
01:05:25
DeeBo
Hmm.
01:05:28
DeeBo
Does that make sense to be the entire scene in a trailer and then nothing else?
01:05:32
dirtycheeks
no not at all that is ridiculous this is a stupid trailer written by stupid people that produced it yeah yeah this is a big piece of sort of it
01:05:33
DeeBo
Okay. Yeah.
01:05:36
delta slim
Thank you.
01:05:38
T-Bag
But Chris, how do they come together at the end? There's the big pizza tournament, right? there's there's the big There's the big pizza tournament, and it's a real...
01:05:44
Steve-O
Ha ha.
01:05:47
T-Bag
i You got chocolate in my peanut butter situation.
01:05:50
dirtycheeks
100% because as I said before, one family makes really good dough. The other family makes really good sauce. So I think it was Hayden Christensen. He's the one who's like, or no, he, she gives her, him the sauce.
01:06:05
T-Bag
Right. Right.
01:06:05
dirtycheeks
And she's like, you make the pizza. I'm going to go be a chef in New York.
01:06:09
delta slim
Oh, God.
01:06:10
dirtycheeks
And he makes the best pizza. He wins, but he's like, where is she?
01:06:15
DeeBo
Thank you.
01:06:16
dirtycheeks
She gave me the sauce.
01:06:16
delta slim
i why i Why did I get the wreck of Master?
01:06:18
dirtycheeks
She gave me the sauce.
01:06:19
Steve-O
Yeah.
01:06:20
delta slim
Why didn't you give me the wreck of Master, Mr. Windu? That's what he was saying the whole time.
01:06:25
dirtycheeks
And then he runs to the airport to to stop her from going.
01:06:27
delta slim
And kills a bunch of kids with his lightsaber.
01:06:29
dirtycheeks
yeah
01:06:29
T-Bag
Yep. Yep.
01:06:30
dirtycheeks
I wish. That would be a hell a twist.
01:06:33
T-Bag
Would strangely make this movie significantly better if that happened.
01:06:36
dirtycheeks
Now this could be the most subversive satire ever created, but I'm going to lean toward it's not ah as well.
01:06:40
T-Bag
It clearly is not.
01:06:44
dirtycheeks
um Yeah, this is bad movie. It's really bad. and Here's the here's deal, guys. Like I said, these were both neck and neck, and I got to get it to Little Italy. It's just so bad.
01:06:57
dirtycheeks
like It's
01:06:57
delta slim
Wow.
March Badness Competition
01:06:58
T-Bag
Yes.
01:06:58
DeeBo
do it
01:06:58
dirtycheeks
slightly worse.
01:06:59
T-Bag
Yes.
01:06:59
DeeBo
I'll be honest.
01:07:00
dirtycheeks
Slightly worse.
01:07:00
DeeBo
Tim was doing some heavy lifting there.
01:07:01
T-Bag
Yes.
01:07:02
Steve-O
Mm-hmm.
01:07:03
dirtycheeks
This was tough, because I saw both these, and they're both exactly where I want them to be.
01:07:07
delta slim
Jesus Christ.
01:07:08
dirtycheeks
But this one in inched out a little further.
01:07:11
T-Bag
Hot damn.
01:07:11
delta slim
The angle and angle shot worked.
01:07:13
T-Bag
Yeah.
01:07:14
delta slim
ah
01:07:14
T-Bag
I also knew it was Danny Aiello's final film, and I knew that would hurt Chris.
01:07:18
dirtycheeks
Yeah, that one really stung. That guy, I love Danny Ayala.
01:07:23
T-Bag
He's so good in Jacob's Ladder.
01:07:25
dirtycheeks
Jacob's Ladder, he's going to the right thing.
01:07:27
T-Bag
Yeah.
01:07:27
dirtycheeks
He's great.
01:07:28
T-Bag
He's great.
01:07:29
dirtycheeks
So yes, Little Little Lee moves on to the next bracket. And now the one i hated to talk about the most.
01:07:39
dirtycheeks
The Trump Prophecy and From Justin to Kelly. Oh, man.
01:07:44
DeeBo
You
01:07:46
T-Bag
This is... I... Ugh. i
01:07:48
dirtycheeks
right. So I found out that Steve picked this Trump prophecy. So Steve, I got to talk to you, bud.
01:07:54
Steve-O
Yeah, yeah. What's up, buddy?
01:07:56
dirtycheeks
You owe me 30 minutes of a movie.
01:07:57
Steve-O
What do you mean?
01:07:59
dirtycheeks
You owe me 30 minutes of an actual movie. I didn't get that. I missed it. Because this movie is an hour long. And the other half hour is Michelle Bachman and a bunch of weird pastors talking about Israel and about America.
01:08:08
T-Bag
You
01:08:17
dirtycheeks
yep That's what Trump prophecy is.
01:08:19
Steve-O
Yeah, but they showed it in a theater, Chris.
01:08:21
dirtycheeks
Yeah, they sure did.
01:08:22
T-Bag
got you gotta understand, it's within the rules.
01:08:26
dirtycheeks
This is, this is like two thirds of a movie. This is two thirds of a movie and propaganda.
01:08:30
Steve-O
yeah but
01:08:33
dirtycheeks
And the word I chose for this movie is propaganda.
01:08:33
DeeBo
yeah
01:08:36
dirtycheeks
That's what this fucking movie is.
01:08:38
Steve-O
Now, I had the genre drama.
01:08:43
dirtycheeks
Proper drama, proper drama.
01:08:43
delta slim
Wait, so this is like... This is like um this is like ah last year's Titanic movie then.
01:08:51
dirtycheeks
Dude, you have no idea.
01:08:51
delta slim
Right?
01:08:52
dirtycheeks
This is so much worse than that.
01:08:53
delta slim
It's propaganda.
01:08:56
delta slim
Maybe that's a rule we gotta make.
01:08:56
DeeBo
Oh, my God, dude.
01:08:57
T-Bag
Oh.
01:08:58
Steve-O
Oh.
01:08:58
delta slim
No propaganda movies.
01:08:59
Steve-O
Oh.
01:08:59
T-Bag
Whoa.
01:08:59
Steve-O
a
01:09:00
dirtycheeks
This is is, this one hurt to watch.
01:09:05
DeeBo
God damn it.
01:09:05
dirtycheeks
This one fucking hurt me to watch.
01:09:06
T-Bag
Wow.
01:09:08
DeeBo
god damn
01:09:08
dirtycheeks
This is a delusional man's interpretation of dreams of demons that he has and an orb that told him to vote for Trump.
01:09:21
T-Bag
Okay, you're kind of turning me around right now.
01:09:23
Steve-O
yeah
01:09:26
dirtycheeks
So, this movie came out of the the the mind of an ex-fireman. And the movie... Starts with a terrible fire and a child dies in the fire and they spend about 15 minutes memorializing this child as they're bringing it out. It's desiccated, burnt corpse and he's walking it through the firemen in slow motion and they're all taking their helmets off and shit.
01:09:56
dirtycheeks
Arguably very sad. Goes on a bit long. Fine. So that's where the movie's the only normal part of the film. Because after that, this fireman starts having these vivid nightmares of his house engulfed in flames.
01:10:17
dirtycheeks
And demonic hands rising out of his bed and choking him while he's sleeping. Like hands all over his body.
01:10:28
DeeBo
Does it at least look scary? Like scary demon hands?
01:10:32
dirtycheeks
Well, here's the thing, Devin. Yes, they are demons. And yes, it is kind of scary.
01:10:34
DeeBo
Okay.
01:10:37
dirtycheeks
And of course, the most rational thing you would do, right, is to go see a therapist, right? You would, because he's having these dreams over and over again.
01:10:45
DeeBo
Yeah, talk to somebody.
01:10:45
dirtycheeks
So this is where you've got to talk to somebody, right? And he even, you know, he goes to his his captain in the firehouse and he's like, listen, I got quit. Like, there's something wrong. And he's like, well, did you did you talk to God?
01:10:57
dirtycheeks
You know, he does one of those things. And he's like, I guess I got to talk to God. You know, he's like, yeah, maybe I should get back in touch with Jesus. Anyway, he goes home, has another terrible dream, sets up an appointment with a therapist.
01:11:10
dirtycheeks
He's talking the therapist. He's like, yeah, I'm having these crazy fucking dreams. It was like my house is on fire. And like now these demonic voices are talking to me. And they're telling me to do things.
01:11:21
dirtycheeks
Now there's hands coming out of the bed and they're choking me. And this is where the movie's reality switches off. And the therapist looks at him and he says, well, that's interesting.
01:11:32
dirtycheeks
Did you ever think these are messages from God?
01:11:35
delta slim
Oh my God.
01:11:36
dirtycheeks
And he's like, well, no, I never really thought about it that way He's like, maybe you should have them more to talk to God.
01:11:44
T-Bag
but
01:11:45
Steve-O
Ha ha ha ha ha!
01:11:45
dirtycheeks
Yeah.
01:11:45
delta slim
What the fuck?
01:11:49
dirtycheeks
And he just is like, i think you're healthy.
01:11:49
Steve-O
yes
01:11:52
dirtycheeks
You're just, you have God talking to you. So that's the therapist gives him a, you know, clean but ah bill of health, sends him on his way home.
01:11:55
T-Bag
Yeah, sure. Sure, Doc.
01:12:00
DeeBo
Yeah, of course. Yeah.
01:12:02
dirtycheeks
And at this point he starts having dreams, not of demons, but of this giant floating orb that, and that lifts out of his bed. And the orb is like, you will know Trump's name.
01:12:15
dirtycheeks
you will He will run for the president of united if the United States. He will you know solidify Israel and bring the Jews back to the Holy Land. ah ba Blah, bla blah, blah, blah, blah.
01:12:28
dirtycheeks
So he's like, i don't even know who Trump is, but this orb's telling me I got to vote for him.
01:12:29
delta slim
Amen.
01:12:33
dirtycheeks
And he's like watching the news now. And now Trump's like rising in the polls. And well, he's not, he's losing to Hillary. And he's desperately trying to find like a ah ah book publisher to publish this manifesto that he's writing about you.
01:12:49
DeeBo
That sounds healthy.
01:12:51
T-Bag
Yeah, good, good, good.
01:12:53
dirtycheeks
So then all, all these people in his life, everybody's enabling him like in his delusion, in his belief in like demons and shit. Like, they're just like, you know, that's a totally valid thing.
01:13:08
dirtycheeks
It's absolute insanity. And then the end of the movie, Trump wins, you know, and he, they start using these, uh, these horns of Israel.
01:13:21
dirtycheeks
Like the, you apparently have some sort of, tradition that when all the Jews go back to Israel to the Holy land, they blow this horn to signify like the second coming of Christ. Like it's the, the world is becoming a new again.
01:13:36
dirtycheeks
um so they start layering all that shit in and then the movie ends with Trump winning. And then, like I said, 30 fucking minutes of retired generals, pastors, Michelle fucking Bachman talking about, well, we have to, you know, we have to,
01:13:52
dirtycheeks
re unite Israel. Basically, yes.
01:13:56
T-Bag
so So this is the people that own Hobby Lobby's fetish movie about trying to bring ah about the rapture?
01:14:08
dirtycheeks
basically yeah
01:14:08
T-Bag
Because ah ah for those who don't know, ah listeners who may not know, the folks behind Hobby Lobby ah have been funding or were funding ah like excursions to steal artifacts from the Middle East because they believe that doing so will facilitate the rapture happening.
01:14:29
dirtycheeks
Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm.
01:14:29
T-Bag
And they donated a shitload of money to Trump because they believe that him being elected will... do something in Israel. And then the rapture happens as soon as Israel is all squared away, thumbs up, good to go.
01:14:42
dirtycheeks
Mm-hmm.
01:14:43
T-Bag
And so they're all trying to effectively destroy the world, but in their mind, it's a good thing to do because most of the people that are quote unquote, good Christians will disappear and be taken up to heaven.
01:14:57
dirtycheeks
raptured into heaven, not having to deal with all the shit that they leave behind, which is a pretty great Christian thing that they do nowadays.
01:14:58
T-Bag
Yeah.
01:15:04
T-Bag
Yep.
01:15:04
dirtycheeks
No consequences. I'm going to heaven. um
01:15:08
Steve-O
Thank you.
01:15:08
dirtycheeks
Yeah. This is, yeah, ever.
01:15:09
T-Bag
What do you mean nowadays? Let's bet their shit forever.
01:15:11
dirtycheeks
Yeah. You're right. You're right. Yeah. The people that made this piece of shit, it was real work studio, partnered with Liberty university. That's a Christian college funded by Jerry fucking Falwell.
01:15:24
dirtycheeks
So yeah.
01:15:24
T-Bag
Oh, God.
01:15:25
dirtycheeks
Yeah.
01:15:26
T-Bag
Oh, no.
01:15:26
dirtycheeks
Yep, that's where this money's coming from.
01:15:31
T-Bag
I thought I was being a little much when I picked Little Italy.
01:15:34
dirtycheeks
is so bad.
01:15:37
Steve-O
Tim, I came to win this year.
01:15:37
dirtycheeks
um
01:15:38
T-Bag
Okay, sure enough.
01:15:38
dirtycheeks
good
01:15:39
T-Bag
You know what? You know what? I think you may have earned it, my guy.
01:15:45
dirtycheeks
a depiction of Christian nationalism in the USA. The producers deny any political motive behind the film. ah Liberty university student started a petition trying to stop the production of the movie. Way to go, kid.
01:15:57
dirtycheeks
um
01:15:58
T-Bag
Yes, I'm reading that as well.
01:15:58
dirtycheeks
bank
01:15:59
T-Bag
like A kid who went to the Christian college was like, hey, this is fucked up.
01:16:05
dirtycheeks
What a cool dude.
01:16:05
T-Bag
You should not do this.
01:16:07
dirtycheeks
like that person. Based on the real life story,
01:16:10
T-Bag
Holy hell.
01:16:11
delta slim
how How is this an actual movie though? Like, like it's, it's, I don't know, man. This is like a fan fiction, like, if feel like the way you describe it, it's like ah like a YouTube like a home movie that some fucking idiot made.
01:16:28
dirtycheeks
You know what it is, John?
01:16:28
delta slim
His backyard.
01:16:29
dirtycheeks
It's a Neil Breen movie that's not entertaining in the least.
01:16:32
T-Bag
Yeah. Yeah.
01:16:33
DeeBo
Yeah, that somehow got a theatrical release.
01:16:33
dirtycheeks
That's what I watched.
01:16:36
dirtycheeks
And it's actively, like, bad. Like, actively evil in a lot of ways.
01:16:40
T-Bag
A lot of these movies here are bad. Let's get that out of the way. This is the only movie, as far as I know, on this list that is morally repugnant.
01:16:49
dirtycheeks
Yeah, exactly. Like, there's... i'm not I'm not offended. Well, maybe I am.
01:16:53
delta slim
No offense, Steve, but this like how is this a real movie?
01:16:58
DeeBo
I mean,
01:16:59
T-Bag
It's listed as a Christian drama.
01:16:59
delta slim
Like, how does this count?
01:17:00
DeeBo
oh
01:17:00
T-Bag
It counts.
01:17:01
Steve-O
i
01:17:02
T-Bag
I'm not going argue it.
01:17:02
DeeBo
the criteria.
01:17:02
delta slim
A drama?
01:17:02
DeeBo
God.
01:17:03
Steve-O
I went on IMDB and I was looking up dramas and I said, what is something that I can find that Chris will hate?
01:17:05
delta slim
ha ha ha ha! Ha ha ha
01:17:14
dirtycheeks
Man, you figured it out, brother.
01:17:14
T-Bag
Yeah.
01:17:17
dirtycheeks
You figured it out.
01:17:17
DeeBo
yeah
01:17:17
T-Bag
Steve opened the Lament configuration and it was like, hey, what's the worst movie you've ever seen?
01:17:17
dirtycheeks
You cracked the code.
01:17:21
delta slim
ha! Ha ha ha ha!
01:17:22
Steve-O
I'm going to give him boring horror and political nightmare drama.
01:17:25
delta slim
Alright, so I'll just pick... I'm going to pick PewDiePie clips of of him ma saying seeing slurs next year.
01:17:30
dirtycheeks
but
01:17:31
DeeBo
that was
01:17:31
Steve-O
Ha ha ha ha ha!
01:17:32
dirtycheeks
ah oh No!
01:17:35
Steve-O
That's why you got rid of the box office.
01:17:37
DeeBo
Yeah.
01:17:38
dirtycheeks
You the... You moved the flagpoles.
01:17:40
Steve-O
But you didn't move the bodies.
01:17:40
dirtycheeks
It's over now.
01:17:42
delta slim
No, because wherever we set the flagpoles, it doesn't matter because people can find crazy shit like this that... Man...
01:17:49
T-Bag
At least with my... i just as good like i'm I'm totally fine not winning this year because of the Trump prophecy, right?
01:17:55
delta slim
i feel I have a...
01:17:56
T-Bag
But I do want to say that at least every movie I have picked for March Madness so far is something I have been willing to sit through myself.
01:17:57
delta slim
Yeah.
01:18:03
dirtycheeks
yeah
01:18:04
T-Bag
And...
01:18:04
Steve-O
I don't know.
01:18:04
delta slim
like, the thing is, like, the...
01:18:06
dirtycheeks
Looks like Steve's going to be watching the Trump prophecy very soon.
01:18:06
delta slim
thea there' no is there There's no... There's no Rotten Tomatoes score for this movie, right?
01:18:12
dirtycheeks
No Rotten Tomatoes score, but it has an audience score of 31%. And I wish every one of that 31% to die in a fire.
01:18:19
DeeBo
yeah Oh my goodness. Yeah.
01:18:20
dirtycheeks
So.
01:18:21
delta slim
i a Yeah, ive I have a couple ideas for next year, I think.
01:18:24
T-Bag
Yeah, right? think Steve unlocked a cheat code here.
01:18:26
delta slim
I think... No, yeah, I think, yeah, we're gonna we're gonna make some fucking changes next year, trust me.
01:18:27
dirtycheeks
Budget.
01:18:32
delta slim
There's gonna be some real changes.
01:18:33
dirtycheeks
Buy you the two million box off of 671,198 bucks. They couldn't even crack a million, these pieces of shit.
01:18:40
delta slim
That's, like, insane. No, but, like, how did they even make that much money? Like, that's...
01:18:43
Steve-O
That's only, unfortunately, that is only two days of being in a theater.
01:18:47
dirtycheeks
ah
01:18:47
delta slim
That's incredible. incredible That's actually amazing.
01:18:48
dirtycheeks
but
01:18:50
delta slim
And it's all in fucking, like, rural rural America.
01:18:51
Steve-O
That's just, that's just disgusting, disgusting, just corrupt, like right wing, like just money.
01:18:55
dirtycheeks
Mud people.
01:19:00
T-Bag
Let
01:19:00
delta slim
Yeah, and you know and you know what, Steve?
01:19:00
Steve-O
Yeah.
01:19:01
delta slim
You enabled somebody else to ah to waste their time watching this.
01:19:05
DeeBo
Oh,
01:19:05
delta slim
So, ah congratulations.
01:19:05
T-Bag
let me ask you something, Chris.
01:19:06
Steve-O
Hey, but you didn't, you didn't have to pay for it though, Chris, did you?
01:19:07
delta slim
Congratulations. Congratulations to you.
01:19:09
Steve-O
Cause it was on YouTube.
01:19:09
dirtycheeks
No, fuck no. It's on it's on Amazon Prime, actually, for free.
01:19:12
T-Bag
Okay. Yep.
01:19:13
Steve-O
Oh my God. Oh,
01:19:14
dirtycheeks
So let's start thinking about Amazon Prime a little deeper.
01:19:15
delta slim
Ah, so they're like they're getting some money then, right? Because it's streaming.
01:19:18
Steve-O
Oh.
01:19:20
T-Bag
Yep.
01:19:20
delta slim
So Chris watching it, it's not like Chris you know stole the v the VHS tape and watched it in a basement somewhere. He actually...
01:19:27
dirtycheeks
Don't worry, I'll watch a bunch of porn to watch that away.
01:19:29
delta slim
There was money.
01:19:29
dirtycheeks
It'll make it a little negative out.
01:19:33
delta slim
so so Some money went to this movie because of Chris watching it.
01:19:36
dirtycheeks
ah
01:19:36
delta slim
So...
01:19:37
dirtycheeks
um Rick Eldridge, a troubled and legally embattled film producer and owner of Real Work Studios, swindled the addle-brained executive director of LIBU into financing this nonsense.
01:19:38
delta slim
Congrats to you, too, Chris. For...
01:19:50
dirtycheeks
I don't even know what the fuck that means.
01:19:53
DeeBo
I'm sorry.
01:19:53
dirtycheeks
Damn it! What a piece of shit!
01:19:54
Steve-O
ah Wait, Chris, what was the one word for this one?
01:19:55
dirtycheeks
um
01:19:58
dirtycheeks
Propaganda.
01:19:58
T-Bag
Propaganda.
01:19:59
Steve-O
Propaganda. Okay.
01:20:00
dirtycheeks
um Yeah, this is pure propaganda. I actually don't watch this, Steve. Nobody watched this. iie
01:20:08
T-Bag
Of course not.
01:20:08
dirtycheeks
We brought up a really good point. Anybody who watches this is giving these assholes money. Don't do it. I did it purely for research purposes.
01:20:14
delta slim
yeah Yeah, good job, Chris.
01:20:16
dirtycheeks
I did this for research purposes only.
01:20:17
T-Bag
yeah
01:20:18
dirtycheeks
That is all. I had no idea what I was walking into.
01:20:22
T-Bag
I'm not blaming Chris for watching it. I'm blaming Steve for making Chris watch it.
01:20:26
delta slim
Yeah, it's on you, Steve.
01:20:26
dirtycheeks
There you
01:20:27
T-Bag
This blood money is on Steve's hands.
01:20:28
delta slim
Yeah, yeah, the blood's on your hands, Steve.
01:20:31
Steve-O
ah I'm going to have the Monster Man trophy with the blood all over it.
01:20:35
dirtycheeks
Alright.
01:20:35
T-Bag
Ha ha!
01:20:40
T-Bag
All right.
01:20:41
dirtycheeks
So, let's move on to something little better.
'From Justin to Kelly' Critique
01:20:45
Steve-O
yeah
01:20:46
delta slim
Well, that's that sucked out that sucked all the ah the fun out of this activity, by the way.
01:20:48
Steve-O
ah
01:20:49
dirtycheeks
yeah it That was a piece of shit movie.
01:20:51
T-Bag
Yeah, seriously.
01:20:54
dirtycheeks
This is a piece of shit movie, but it made me feel better than that one.
01:20:58
delta slim
Should you even go through with the rest of the bracket?
01:21:00
DeeBo
yeah
01:21:01
delta slim
I mean, I think you made your case.
01:21:02
dirtycheeks
Well, I do want to talk about from Justin to Kelly a little bit before move on, because there is some interesting, I guess I should have, but it is the first one I'm going purely by what you guys had it ranked here.
01:21:05
DeeBo
Okay, yeah, yeah.
01:21:06
delta slim
you should You should have talked about that first, to be honest.
01:21:06
DeeBo
We'll finish it up.
01:21:09
T-Bag
Yeah.
01:21:13
T-Bag
Yep, that's fair.
01:21:14
delta slim
yeah
01:21:14
T-Bag
That's fair.
01:21:14
delta slim
rise to Trump prophecy.
01:21:14
dirtycheeks
So, uh, from Justin to Kelly, I, I put this one down as a phone.
01:21:20
delta slim
I was excited for this one, man. From Justin to Kelly.
01:21:24
dirtycheeks
This was ah this, I, the word I would use to describe this movie is phony. Um, I felt like nothing felt genuine.
01:21:30
delta slim
How dare you.
01:21:31
DeeBo
Yeah.
01:21:32
dirtycheeks
everything. And you know, musicals, listen, musicals are inherently kind of phony.
01:21:37
T-Bag
Yeah.
01:21:37
delta slim
So the trump the Trump prophecy wasn't phony then in your eyes? Is what you saying?
01:21:40
dirtycheeks
No, it's propaganda lies told to, to control people.
01:21:41
delta slim
Like...
01:21:47
delta slim
All right.
01:21:47
dirtycheeks
Like that's way worse.
01:21:48
delta slim
Got him.
01:21:49
dirtycheeks
Um, this is just a stupid movie with people from American Idol in it.
01:21:49
delta slim
Got
01:21:53
dirtycheeks
Like it's so unoffensive.
01:21:56
delta slim
him. The goat is in it.
01:21:56
dirtycheeks
Um,
01:21:57
delta slim
Kelly Clarkson.
01:21:58
dirtycheeks
Dude, and she's great. Like, her voice is amazing in this movie. And I do really like Kelly Clarkson, too. So, I didn't... I mean, she's a terrible actress.
01:22:09
dirtycheeks
i Don't get me wrong. But, like, I found out a little bit something about her in this movie, too. Where Clarkson pleaded with the creator of American Idol to be released from her contractual obligation to star in this movie.
01:22:23
DeeBo
oh
01:22:23
T-Bag
Whoa.
01:22:24
dirtycheeks
Um, she said, I knew when I read the script, it was going to be real, real bad.
01:22:26
T-Bag
Yeah.
01:22:28
dirtycheeks
But when I, when I won, I signed that piece of paper and I could not get out of it. I don't blame her. I would have done the same thing.
01:22:35
DeeBo
Yeah, you know what? Because those those ah contracts I heard are like historically bad.
01:22:41
dirtycheeks
Yeah, they are. Especially for American Idol winners, right? Like it's just, it's exp exploitive, right?
01:22:44
T-Bag
yeah
01:22:44
DeeBo
Yeah.
01:22:46
dirtycheeks
They're going to use you as much as they possibly can until nobody likes you anymore. Um, yeah, no, this is, Like, this is just, nobody wanted to do this. That's what this movie feels like.
01:22:59
dirtycheeks
like Like, it felt like a like a project that you're forced to do in school. Like, that's what everybody's energy is in this movie.
01:23:04
T-Bag
Yep.
01:23:09
dirtycheeks
And it's just so put upon.
01:23:11
T-Bag
Is it a jukebox musical, Chris? Is it like like pop songs or is it like songs written for the movie?
01:23:17
dirtycheeks
Oh, it's pop songs. Like, they sing pop songs, like fun little versions of different pop songs.
01:23:23
T-Bag
Okay, so it's a jukebox musical. Okay.
01:23:24
dirtycheeks
yeah Yeah, yeah, Like...
01:23:25
T-Bag
Not music. that No one's breaking into song ah like ah like Fiddler on the Roof kind of like to describe the situation that's happening necessarily.
01:23:31
dirtycheeks
What...
01:23:34
dirtycheeks
What I would describe it as is like an Elvis Presley movie on the beach.
01:23:37
T-Bag
Okay. Like a ah Blue Hawaii or whatever.
01:23:40
dirtycheeks
Yeah, yeah, exactly. Like, real classic 50s musical with, like, a celebrity in it that can sing. Like, knows how to sing. Like, um... it It's just... Yeah, they're just terrible. Like...
01:23:55
dirtycheeks
Elvis was bad, but he had like charisma. um like Kelly Clarkson is just not a great actress. She's a wonderful singer, but she doesn't have that level of presence that a lot of other like bigger singers do.
01:24:09
T-Bag
Right.
01:24:10
dirtycheeks
and I don't blame her like for not wanting to do this. She knew that about herself, at least. She knew what she what what she was capable of, and she knew this was going to be bad, too. like The script was awful. like Even if she was a good actress, I don't think this movie would have been good.
01:24:26
delta slim
Well, least she's like, you know...
01:24:26
DeeBo
Yeah, like a good yeah good actor even still have been.
01:24:28
delta slim
Yeah, Kelly Clarkson's... good she you know she's Now she's like fucking slaying it on her She got her own show.
01:24:33
dirtycheeks
Right.
01:24:34
T-Bag
right
01:24:34
delta slim
singing Singing the best versions of of songs.
01:24:34
dirtycheeks
She's great.
01:24:34
dirtycheeks
Like I, I, she, the best thing that could ever happen is she had this movie just washed over and her career wasn't even affected by it.
01:24:34
Steve-O
Mm-hmm.
01:24:38
delta slim
Sanged by other people.
01:24:42
T-Bag
Sure.
01:24:43
delta slim
Yeah.
01:24:45
dirtycheeks
Really. Um, Justin Bolvini on the other hand, what happened to that guy, but he's gone. Um, The rush production of approximately two and a half months.
01:24:57
dirtycheeks
So it was super fast shoot. Not the quickest shoot ever, which American Pie holds for 29 days of production.
01:25:05
DeeBo
who
01:25:05
delta slim
Man, you know what we call that?
01:25:05
dirtycheeks
American Pie 2.
01:25:06
delta slim
ah fish call that efficiency, Chris.
01:25:07
dirtycheeks
American Pie.
01:25:09
delta slim
That's what we call it.
01:25:09
dirtycheeks
Efficiency. um Some theater chains were concerned when Fox announced its intention to release the film on VHS and DVD a mere six weeks after its opening weekend.
01:25:21
dirtycheeks
Theater chains threatened boycott and Fox reversed, but due to the disappointed box office, and they released the film after six weeks anyway.
01:25:30
T-Bag
yeah Six weeks seems like a lifetime and in 2025. It's interesting.
01:25:33
dirtycheeks
I know.
01:25:34
Steve-O
Mm-hmm.
01:25:34
dirtycheeks
That's why I brought it up because it's like, now it's like, fuck.
01:25:36
T-Bag
interesting
01:25:38
dirtycheeks
three weeks maybe at a box office before it's on Netflix or something else.
01:25:43
T-Bag
No, no, Chris, I haven't seen from Justin to Kelly, but I did as we were researching movies we could potentially pick. ah This was I had the musical category. And so I had looked at from Justin to Kelly and I watched a few scenes on YouTube. And um correct me if I'm wrong, but there is a white girl with dreads in this movie.
01:26:00
dirtycheeks
Oh, and she's the villain.
01:26:02
T-Bag
OK, cool, cool, cool, cool.
01:26:03
dirtycheeks
She's the antagonist.
01:26:04
T-Bag
So she's featured prominently and not just a ah background character.
01:26:05
delta slim
Wasn't there...
01:26:07
dirtycheeks
Yeah.
01:26:07
delta slim
Weren't there white people in Dreads with a... In, um... In The Matrix Reloaded? Am I thinking of something different?
01:26:12
Steve-O
Yeah, the ghosts.
01:26:12
dirtycheeks
Yeah, the ghosts.
01:26:13
DeeBo
ah Yeah, they were albino ghosts.
01:26:14
T-Bag
Yeah, the ghosts.
01:26:15
delta slim
Yeah. Yeah.
01:26:15
DeeBo
Yeah, ghost programs or whatever.
01:26:15
T-Bag
Yep.
01:26:16
dirtycheeks
They were like weird monsters, though, so they got a pass. They couldn't get into the dreads.
01:26:19
delta slim
That's why that movie was bad.
01:26:19
DeeBo
that part.
01:26:20
delta slim
Now I remember.
01:26:21
dirtycheeks
Yeah, right?
01:26:22
DeeBo
and that that part
01:26:23
T-Bag
That's the only reason that movie was bad. Yep.
01:26:25
dirtycheeks
By the way, definitely not the highway scene, because that's the best fucking scene in that fucking movie.
01:26:29
delta slim
Oh, man.
01:26:30
dirtycheeks
And it...
01:26:30
T-Bag
Yep.
01:26:31
Steve-O
don't
01:26:31
delta slim
Yeah, trust me.
01:26:31
dirtycheeks
all
01:26:32
delta slim
I've argued with Devin all for the entirety of our friendship over what's better, Matrix Reloader or Matrix Revolutions, and I always bring that up.
01:26:41
dirtycheeks
Reloaded is so much better.
01:26:43
DeeBo
Oh, the Revolution has steaks.
01:26:43
delta slim
No, don't don' tell Devin that. Don't tell Devin!
01:26:45
DeeBo
There's steaks in that one at least. Two's nothing burger.
01:26:49
delta slim
um' like I'm like Devin, 89% of that movie, we're not even in the Matrix.
01:26:54
DeeBo
Oh, it doesn't matter.
01:26:54
delta slim
It sucks.
01:26:54
Steve-O
Ooh, I think I got ourselves an idea that we can talk about for the next March Madness.
01:26:55
DeeBo
It doesn't
01:26:58
T-Bag
Okay, okay.
01:27:00
dirtycheeks
all right, let's...
01:27:00
T-Bag
Which Matrix movie is the worst?
01:27:01
Steve-O
No, no, no.
01:27:03
DeeBo
matter.
01:27:03
Steve-O
It has to be like the disastrous sequels to huge blockbusters.
01:27:04
dirtycheeks
Bad sequels?
01:27:06
T-Bag
Okay.
01:27:06
dirtycheeks
Ooh! I like that.
01:27:08
delta slim
Oh, nice. So i'll find I'll find the sequel to fucking Trump Nazi movie.
01:27:09
T-Bag
Yep.
01:27:11
dirtycheeks
Trump prophecy?
01:27:12
Steve-O
Ha ha ha ha
01:27:12
T-Bag
Yep.
01:27:15
delta slim
I'll make Chris watch that fucking Birth of a Nation.
01:27:16
Steve-O
ah
01:27:17
dirtycheeks
yeah I mean, listen, I didn't i didn't think I was going to get offended watching any of these movies, but I just haven't.
01:27:19
delta slim
I'll just make a watch fucking Ku Klux Klan propaganda until he gets mad.
01:27:20
T-Bag
it's
01:27:24
Steve-O
ah Dude, just make him watch all those Ben Shapiro movies.
01:27:28
delta slim
Exactly.
01:27:31
delta slim
you sat Yeah, I mean, you we could hear your blood boiling fucking talking about that.
01:27:34
T-Bag
Yeah. All
01:27:35
DeeBo
yeah
01:27:37
delta slim
ah Anyway.
01:27:37
DeeBo
I mean, yeah.
01:27:38
dirtycheeks
I'm sorry.
01:27:38
delta slim
Sorry.
01:27:38
dirtycheeks
i I can't really hold back when when I had to talk about it.
01:27:38
DeeBo
yeah
01:27:39
delta slim
are
01:27:40
DeeBo
No, I remember Chris told me, yeah.
01:27:41
delta slim
Alright, so Trump prophecy wins, right?
01:27:42
T-Bag
right. So but now from Justin to Kelly moves on to the next round.
01:27:43
delta slim
Yeah, we're...
01:27:45
dirtycheeks
From Justin and Kelly, it holds a Rotten Tomatoes score of 8%, audience score 39%, box office 4.9 million, budget of 12 million, 81 minutes.
01:27:46
DeeBo
ah
01:27:53
dirtycheeks
It's also why I had it a little higher on the list because so short. And it was made in 2003. a lot of these movies came from the early 2000s, which is crazy because it's...
01:28:04
delta slim
Which is sad.
01:28:05
dirtycheeks
It is kind of sad. Anyway, so now all the movies have been ah spoken about.
01:28:12
T-Bag
Yep.
01:28:12
delta slim
Oh yeah, we gotta move. Alright, so Trump Prophecy wins. Just gotta to get the word.
01:28:15
dirtycheeks
Trump Prophecy easily moves on to the next bracket.
01:28:17
delta slim
Alright, so here is here's the final here's the final four, Chris.
01:28:18
T-Bag
Blows past Justin Nicali.
01:28:21
dirtycheeks
Okay.
01:28:24
delta slim
We
01:28:27
delta slim
can go through it all again. Just describe each movie again.
01:28:31
DeeBo
Yeah.
01:28:32
dirtycheeks
Go through each one.
01:28:32
DeeBo
yeah
01:28:32
T-Bag
Yep.
01:28:33
dirtycheeks
Describe of each one again.
01:28:34
delta slim
Yeah, so it's Disappointments Room versus Lawnmower Man 2, Job's War. What you got?
01:28:40
dirtycheeks
then so disappointments room, longer men.
01:28:46
dirtycheeks
I'm real. I'm trying to, I'm looking at my list and I'm just looking, I'm giving myself another shot here. Just double check.
01:28:52
delta slim
Yeah, yeah.
01:28:52
Steve-O
Yeah, take yourself some time.
01:28:53
dirtycheeks
Cause these two, these two are back to back.
01:28:53
delta slim
cross Cross your T's, dot your eyes.
01:28:55
Steve-O
Wait, wait, wait. wait what is that What is the first round of this one?
Competition Finals and Reflections
01:28:59
dirtycheeks
The disappointments room and lawn or lawnmower man too.
01:29:02
delta slim
Lawn Mower Man.
01:29:03
DeeBo
This is the semi-finals, yeah.
01:29:04
dirtycheeks
So these two, you know what? I'm going to change on my list. I'm moving Disappointments Room down. No, no. Lawnmower Man 2. Lawnmower Man 2 wins.
01:29:15
dirtycheeks
Never mind. I'm sorry.
01:29:16
DeeBo
Okay.
01:29:17
delta slim
Lawn Mower Man 2 wins and advances to the final.
01:29:17
DeeBo
okay You know what, man?
01:29:17
dirtycheeks
Nah. Nah, nah, nah.
01:29:20
DeeBo
my i Always a bridesmaid, never a bride.
01:29:21
dirtycheeks
I gotta go with my gut.
01:29:24
delta slim
Alright, now. and but Little Italy versus the Trump prophecy.
01:29:26
Steve-O
don't know.
01:29:27
DeeBo
I'm always getting there. I'm always getting to second place. Yeah.
01:29:30
delta slim
Hold on, Devin. Let him let them work it out.
01:29:32
DeeBo
Yeah, I'll let him work it out.
01:29:32
delta slim
Let him work it out. Let him work it out.
01:29:34
dirtycheeks
that would be the That would be the Trump prophecy. That wins.
01:29:37
DeeBo
Yeah.
01:29:38
T-Bag
Are you sure?
01:29:38
delta slim
Yeah, Little Italy.
01:29:40
T-Bag
Yep.
01:29:40
delta slim
Like, fun rom-com movie about pizza versus versus Hitler the movie.
01:29:40
T-Bag
Yep.
01:29:43
dirtycheeks
Hey, guys.
01:29:46
delta slim
Which one which one you want?
01:29:46
dirtycheeks
You hear this sound?
01:29:46
Steve-O
ah
01:29:47
dirtycheeks
You hear this sound? That's me ripping up my list because I no longer have to consult it. I know it's winning.
01:29:51
Steve-O
Oh my god.
01:29:51
T-Bag
yep okay
01:29:52
Steve-O
Wait, now hold on. Hold on.
01:29:53
T-Bag
ah
01:29:54
Steve-O
That scene in Little Italy where the orb comes out of the bed.
01:29:58
dirtycheeks
It wasn't an arm.
01:29:59
DeeBo
ah that
01:29:59
dirtycheeks
It was a pizza.
01:30:00
Steve-O
Win the pizza our tournament.
01:30:00
DeeBo
Yeah. um but That was a mozzarella ball, dude.
01:30:04
dirtycheeks
It's a big mozzarella ball and it talked to him.
01:30:05
Steve-O
Ha ha ha ha ah
01:30:07
delta slim
Alright, wait, wait, wait, wait.
01:30:08
dirtycheeks
used the sauce.
01:30:08
delta slim
So, alright, so here's the final now, Chris. We gotta go through the motions here.
01:30:11
dirtycheeks
Okay.
01:30:14
delta slim
Here's the hydrogen bomb versus coughing baby.
01:30:15
DeeBo
Yeah.
01:30:18
delta slim
What you got?
01:30:20
dirtycheeks
It's the Trump Prophecy, boys!
01:30:22
delta slim
Okay.
01:30:22
DeeBo
Yeah.
01:30:22
T-Bag
Yeah.
01:30:23
Steve-O
and Let's go!
01:30:26
delta slim
Does that feel good to you, Steve?
01:30:26
T-Bag
Congratulations, Steve.
01:30:27
Steve-O
but
01:30:28
T-Bag
Yeah, do you?
01:30:28
Steve-O
sold my soul for the Monster Man trophy!
01:30:31
dirtycheeks
sure did.
01:30:31
delta slim
This is like like, imagine if we, this feels like, imagine if we made Chris do this but for video games, and like we just made him play that that rape game that got banned on the team.
01:30:41
dirtycheeks
dude!
01:30:41
T-Bag
Oh, God.
01:30:41
Steve-O
Oh, God!
01:30:41
DeeBo
Yeah.
01:30:42
delta slim
Like, that's like that, like, yeah, that's like, it's the same thing.
01:30:42
dirtycheeks
You fucking dicks.
01:30:42
DeeBo
Yeah.
01:30:43
T-Bag
Yeah, that's better of what it feels like.
01:30:45
dirtycheeks
I would never, first of all, I would never do that.
01:30:45
delta slim
the same thing.
01:30:47
dirtycheeks
I would never, ever fucking play that.
01:30:48
delta slim
You watch this movie.
01:30:49
dirtycheeks
Yeah, well, you know what?
01:30:51
T-Bag
You did watch this movie.
01:30:51
DeeBo
Yeah. yeah and
01:30:52
dirtycheeks
Call me once, shame on you.
01:30:52
delta slim
Ha ha.
01:30:52
DeeBo
the thing news is
01:30:54
delta slim
Ha ha.
01:30:54
DeeBo
and is yeah we don't tell chris it's the rape game until he plays it and we go you
01:30:59
delta slim
Until he plays it.
01:31:00
T-Bag
Yep.
01:31:00
DeeBo
go
01:31:00
delta slim
Yeah, he's got to go in blind.
01:31:01
DeeBo
yeahre sick oh dude
01:31:02
dirtycheeks
Like, I kind of thought it was going to be more like, like the left behind, like that Christian drama series.
01:31:03
DeeBo
ah
01:31:08
DeeBo
yeah
01:31:09
dirtycheeks
So I was like, oh, maybe it's like an end of the world thing and I could just focus on that. But nope.
01:31:15
delta slim
Jesus Christ.
01:31:16
dirtycheeks
It was that. It was way worse.
01:31:20
DeeBo
Yeah, i i do remember I do remember having a conversation with Chris, and he's like, I'm not going to say what it was.
01:31:21
delta slim
Alright, here's the final results.
01:31:23
T-Bag
Yep.
01:31:28
DeeBo
He's like, but there is a clear winner.
01:31:31
dirtycheeks
yeah
01:31:31
DeeBo
He's like, it's not even close.
01:31:32
delta slim
ah
01:31:33
DeeBo
And I was like, I hope it's from Justin to Kelly.
01:31:33
T-Bag
Yep.
01:31:38
T-Bag
Yep.
01:31:40
DeeBo
and i i
01:31:40
delta slim
Final results for 2025, guys.
01:31:40
dirtycheeks
Sorry, Devin. So, Devin, what was the... You picked Job's War and...
01:31:44
DeeBo
I picked Joe's War and Justin to Kelly.
01:31:46
dirtycheeks
Justin McKelley?
01:31:47
DeeBo
Yeah, it was me.
01:31:47
dirtycheeks
Okay. Steve, you picked Disappointment's Ruin, Trump Prophecy.
01:31:50
Steve-O
yeah
01:31:51
dirtycheeks
Tim picked the Apple and Little Italy.
01:31:53
T-Bag
Yep.
01:31:53
dirtycheeks
And then John picked Ballistics X versus Never.
01:31:55
delta slim
John picked actual movies to to make to make this activity fun. And...
01:31:59
dirtycheeks
And the last ever, I'm not.
01:32:00
T-Bag
Hey. Hey, Little italy but Italy is a real movie.
01:32:03
delta slim
I'm just saying. Yeah, I know.
01:32:04
T-Bag
it's got real it's got It's got real people in it.
01:32:05
delta slim
I know. I'm not pointing at you, Tim.
01:32:06
T-Bag
The Apple, I will admit, is not a real movie. Okay.
01:32:10
DeeBo
I thought the Apple was going to be a repeat. I i was i was scared of the Apple. I was like, oh no, Tim's going to do it again.
01:32:16
Steve-O
I was scared of the apple too.
01:32:16
T-Bag
everybody was scar Everybody was scared of the Apple.
01:32:17
Steve-O
Yeah.
01:32:17
DeeBo
We're all scared.
01:32:19
T-Bag
ah But legit, I don't...
01:32:19
delta slim
Chris, I was, yeah.
01:32:23
T-Bag
My strategy coming into these games of March badness, right, is to find... interesting failures that are like, I don't want to hurt Chris, you know, you know what I mean?
01:32:36
delta slim
Steve came with hurt grin.
01:32:37
T-Bag
I don't want to.
01:32:38
delta slim
burn correct
01:32:38
T-Bag
Yeah. Right. Like there's, there's there there's a a culture around bad movies that I think Chris and I both appreciate a whole lot.
01:32:40
dirtycheeks
Whoa.
01:32:45
T-Bag
You know, we both love best of the worst. We love Mr. Science theater 3000. We love these kinds of like, isn't it interesting that someone thought this was a good idea at some point in time, kind of movies. Yeah. um Now I realize that rules are made to be broken and 100% the way to win is to pick the most morally repugnant thing you can possibly find.
01:33:07
delta slim
trust Trust me, we're going to try and... We keep seeing these every year.
01:33:13
DeeBo
but i think I think is...
01:33:14
Steve-O
Thank you.
01:33:14
delta slim
The council keeps seeing these every year.
01:33:15
T-Bag
The council? Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.
01:33:16
delta slim
but We're going to try make
01:33:17
dirtycheeks
and be honest with you, if I'm honest, if you really wanted me to be honest, it's like two thirds of a movie.
01:33:21
T-Bag
Yeah.
01:33:24
dirtycheeks
So it's not even like a full movie.
01:33:25
DeeBo
hello Oh, yeah. You know, it's...
01:33:26
dirtycheeks
If I'm really, if I'm splitting hairs like that, that the propaganda made me angry, but that made me more angry.
01:33:29
DeeBo
Yeah. Almost... Like, Chris, you're... Chris, you're saying that you should have DQ'd yourself, you're saying.
01:33:39
dirtycheeks
I don't know.
01:33:39
DeeBo
Yeah. sir
01:33:39
dirtycheeks
i don't know.
01:33:40
dirtycheeks
You see, this is the issue.
01:33:40
delta slim
Chris, just just to give you my give to give you my ah to give you my thought process here, it was between Ballistic, X vs.
01:33:47
delta slim
Sever, and On Deadly Ground, the Steven Seagal movie. But I feel like both of those are a waste of time if if you're watching um Hitler, 2025 Hitler, the it's kind of like, man, what am I doing here?
01:33:55
T-Bag
yeah
01:34:01
delta slim
Like, oh man.
01:34:02
dirtycheeks
to be honest with you i think a rule should be because i don't want to watch two thirds of a movie again I'm not going to penalize Steve because they're we both had no idea and it was within the rule but I think all of you should watch the picks that you pick
01:34:11
T-Bag
Hey, it was within the rules. like Right.
01:34:13
delta slim
It was within the rules. Yeah, yeah, yeah.
01:34:14
T-Bag
I did.
01:34:20
delta slim
Yeah, we should have to watch it.
01:34:20
T-Bag
Just saying. i did
01:34:22
delta slim
We should watch it with you.
01:34:22
dirtycheeks
I think that that should be a fair rule.
01:34:22
T-Bag
just just saying and
01:34:24
dirtycheeks
No, just the two movies you pick. I think you should you should watch them. Either before or should probably watch them before, but just try to watch them.
01:34:32
delta slim
No. no
01:34:34
DeeBo
yeah that I will say it is fun to watch how ah John's carefully thought of rules get annihilated.
01:34:43
T-Bag
Right.
01:34:43
Steve-O
Just get destroyed.
01:34:44
delta slim
Yeah, they get ripped apart every year.
01:34:44
T-Bag
right Right. Yep.
01:34:47
delta slim
Yeah, because I'm like spitballing right now here too, like just to see, I don't know, what we'll talk about next year.
01:34:53
dirtycheeks
it's hard John, it's ah it's hard to put logic on this stuff.
01:34:53
T-Bag
Right.
01:34:56
dirtycheeks
It's hard to...
01:34:56
delta slim
I think what we, Chris, to to piggyback off of your to your of your idea of we have to watch it together, maybe next year we all pick one movie and we all watch them together at the same time in one day.
01:34:56
T-Bag
Yeah, a lot of it is feeling.
01:34:58
dirtycheeks
a lot of it is feeling.
01:35:07
DeeBo
okay
01:35:07
dirtycheeks
That's a wonderful idea.
01:35:08
T-Bag
And argue about which... Because I would...
01:35:10
dirtycheeks
That's a wonderful idea.
01:35:10
delta slim
and we thought Yeah.
01:35:10
T-Bag
i i like i'll I toyed with the idea of not participating this year because I wanted to be able to watch all of the movies and like have opinions on them.
01:35:11
delta slim
Yeah.
01:35:15
delta slim
ah be like this It would be like us getting together to watch the Super Bowl together. But it's really...
01:35:21
dirtycheeks
yeah
01:35:21
T-Bag
Right, we just watched two movies back to back...
01:35:21
Steve-O
a
01:35:23
delta slim
over're watching...
01:35:23
T-Bag
Four movies, you know, over two days or whatever.
01:35:25
delta slim
Yeah.
01:35:25
dirtycheeks
Yeah.
01:35:26
DeeBo
Yeah.
01:35:26
T-Bag
And make it a symposium.
01:35:26
delta slim
No, no, no.
01:35:27
dirtycheeks
Easy.
01:35:27
delta slim
Four movies in one day.
01:35:28
dirtycheeks
Four movies in one day?
01:35:28
T-Bag
Okay.
01:35:29
delta slim
but pay
01:35:29
DeeBo
but
01:35:29
T-Bag
oh
01:35:29
Steve-O
All movies back to back, back to back to back.
01:35:30
delta slim
<unk>ll we'll pick up We'll pick out of a half...
01:35:30
T-Bag
Dear God, okay.
01:35:31
delta slim
Yeah, I mean, we'll take breaks.
01:35:32
Steve-O
Hmm.
01:35:32
delta slim
We'll have a halftime.
01:35:34
T-Bag
Okay.
01:35:34
delta slim
We'll have a puppy bowl break, right?
01:35:34
T-Bag
Okay.
01:35:35
dirtycheeks
That sounds awesome.
01:35:35
T-Bag
Okay.
01:35:36
dirtycheeks
And you know what's cool about this?
01:35:36
delta slim
we We'll make a whole day out of it
01:35:37
dirtycheeks
Because you you wanted it to be bad sequels. And there's only like... I'm not going to say there's like a handful. But that like cuts the the choice down a little bit. So if it's just four movies that we all have to watch, it's a little easier to pick bad sequels.
01:35:50
delta slim
Yeah, and that way... and It might be fun to watch them all together because then we could give the flat give our flowers to the person who picked them like right after we watch it, you know?
01:35:56
T-Bag
Right, right.
01:35:57
Steve-O
a
01:35:58
DeeBo
Yeah.
01:35:59
dirtycheeks
Wait, should I pick Tuzan? Okay.
01:36:01
Steve-O
I think that would be fun.
01:36:03
delta slim
Yeah.
01:36:04
T-Bag
Yeah, i mean, why not?
01:36:05
dirtycheeks
Alright.
01:36:06
DeeBo
So, Steve, enjoy the trophy that you bought.
01:36:06
delta slim
Yeah, yeah, yeah. Yeah.
01:36:09
Steve-O
What's that?
01:36:09
DeeBo
You bastard.
01:36:10
delta slim
Fuck.
01:36:11
DeeBo
I said enjoy the trophy.
01:36:11
Steve-O
i haven't ordered it yet.
01:36:11
delta slim
Yeah.
01:36:12
DeeBo
Are you ready to order it?
01:36:12
dirtycheeks
He's going...
01:36:14
DeeBo
Oh, my.
01:36:14
Steve-O
i haven't ordered it.
01:36:14
delta slim
Yo, Steve's trophy...
01:36:15
Steve-O
i honestly was scared of the apple. Dude, Tim came in with fucking, he dropped the sequel to the Titanic movie. i Of course I brought a fucking machine gun.
01:36:21
delta slim
Yeah. Yeah.
01:36:23
T-Bag
That's true. That's true. I was lobbying for the sequel to The Legend of the Titanic, which is called like Tentacolio.
01:36:28
dirtycheeks
So, Steve, your argument is escalation.
01:36:31
Steve-O
Yes, yes.
01:36:31
dirtycheeks
That's argument?
01:36:32
T-Bag
Yeah.
01:36:32
delta slim
yeah
01:36:32
dirtycheeks
I mean...
01:36:32
T-Bag
Yes.
01:36:33
Steve-O
but
01:36:33
dirtycheeks
I mean...
01:36:33
T-Bag
It was a mutually assured destruction kind of thing. I was like, well, technically I could find a box the an Italian box office for this sequel to The Legend of the Titanic.
01:36:37
Steve-O
yeah
01:36:42
T-Bag
And John immediately was like, no, American box office. I was like, all right, you know what?
01:36:46
DeeBo
Thank you.
01:36:46
delta slim
Yeah, I'll brainstorm some ideas next year, but like, maybe maybe that's what we got, and we we we bring the copy of the movie ourselves too, and we don't and we don't and we don't set we don't draft, we don't know what each other's gonna bring.
01:36:47
T-Bag
That's fair.
01:36:53
T-Bag
Yeah, and... yeah
01:36:59
T-Bag
And I was excited about the Apple.
01:36:59
delta slim
So I guess we bring Yeah.
01:37:01
Steve-O
the weaker sequel.
01:37:02
T-Bag
Yeah, the weaker sequel.
01:37:03
dirtycheeks
I'll be honest, the Apple was... It's the best of the worst.
01:37:07
T-Bag
Right, that's kind of what I was shooting for.
01:37:07
Steve-O
All right.
01:37:08
T-Bag
was like I've watched the Apple, and it is and it's a weird thing, but it's kind of fun, right?
01:37:09
dirtycheeks
Yeah.
01:37:14
dirtycheeks
Yeah, it is it is kind of fun. It's fun in, like...
01:37:16
T-Bag
But I know also knew you hate musicals, right? So I drafted the musical category.
01:37:19
delta slim
yeah
01:37:20
T-Bag
And justin ah from Justin to Kelly got locked in before the Apple did.
01:37:20
dirtycheeks
You know...
01:37:23
T-Bag
And was like, fuck!
01:37:24
DeeBo
Yeah.
01:37:24
T-Bag
ah So I had to fall back on the movie I could find with the lowest verifiable box office score, which was the Apple.
01:37:31
dirtycheeks
Guys, I'm going to tell you how bad the movies were. The two musicals were at the top of the list.
01:37:37
delta slim
oh man a little italy and uh
01:37:38
T-Bag
Wow.
01:37:38
Steve-O
Whoa.
01:37:40
dirtycheeks
That's how fucking bad the... like the but and The next one after from Justin Kelly is The Last Airbender, The Disappointments Room, Lawnmower Man 2, Ballistics, Little Italy, and then The Trump Prophecy.
01:37:50
delta slim
Yeah, this is... and maybe Yeah, maybe...
01:37:52
dirtycheeks
That's how bad these movies were.
01:37:55
delta slim
Chris, what do you think about this?
01:37:55
T-Bag
ah Wait, so you're you're ranking, Chris, just to clarify.
01:37:56
delta slim
we We bring...
01:37:58
T-Bag
Little Italy was just above the Trump prophecy?
01:38:00
dirtycheeks
Yeah!
01:38:01
T-Bag
Okay, alright. So, you know what?
01:38:03
Steve-O
Whew.
01:38:04
delta slim
Take it! Take that dub. Take the W.
01:38:06
T-Bag
I'm not gonna be mad. I'm not gonna be mad about that at all. I was say i was in the competition.
01:38:12
dirtycheeks
It just felt so
01:38:12
delta slim
um
01:38:13
T-Bag
It was just a hydrogen bomb versus a coughing baby situation.
01:38:15
Steve-O
if yes
01:38:16
DeeBo
Yeah, nothing was going to come close.
01:38:17
delta slim
I think...
01:38:19
T-Bag
Yeah.
01:38:20
dirtycheeks
good.
01:38:20
delta slim
Yeah, maybe like...
01:38:20
dirtycheeks
Trump Prophecy is the worst thus far, by far.
01:38:21
delta slim
um I mean, what what we won't put anything in...
01:38:23
dirtycheeks
but Out of all movies I've watched, the worst.
01:38:25
delta slim
and so But I'm like, you know, I'm thinking about it. And like, maybe we could pick like... It's got to be below this... Like, if you guys want to go low scores, right? We can make it challenging. We can do...
01:38:36
delta slim
Like, it's got be below like 50% or below 40% Rotten Tomatoes. But instead of... It has to be the worst movie. We have to make it the best... Like, Chris has to pick the best movie out of scores.
01:38:47
T-Bag
ah So we want to do a competition for best of the worst instead of worst of the worst.
01:38:47
delta slim
Yeah.
01:38:50
delta slim
Yeah, like, yeah.
01:38:51
T-Bag
Okay.
01:38:51
Steve-O
can i Can I pitch something to you guys as well?
01:38:53
T-Bag
Yeah, let's hear it.
01:38:54
Steve-O
What if we kind of go like a little bit of an award ceremony route? So there's not just there's not just one there's not just one goal we're aiming at.
01:38:59
delta slim
Oh, man. Oh, yeah.
01:39:01
T-Bag
Oh, multiple categories.
01:39:04
Steve-O
We can go for a best.
01:39:05
T-Bag
There's worst actor, worst picture, worst director.
01:39:06
Steve-O
We can go for a worst.
01:39:07
DeeBo
Uh-huh.
01:39:08
Steve-O
we could We could probably do these.
01:39:08
delta slim
Yeah.
01:39:09
Steve-O
Like, yeah. Like, that way...
01:39:11
dirtycheeks
And if it's all us, we could we could do the categories better because we'd all have input on it.
01:39:14
Steve-O
Exactly.
01:39:15
delta slim
Yeah.
01:39:15
dirtycheeks
Yeah.
01:39:16
Steve-O
yeah
01:39:16
delta slim
Okay.
01:39:17
dirtycheeks
I see what you're saying.
01:39:18
delta slim
That way Chris doesn't have to feel like he's tortured every year.
01:39:18
T-Bag
I want to not be New York Ninja for next year.
01:39:21
Steve-O
Yeah, he's not taking the burden on.
01:39:24
dirtycheeks
um everything be honest with you everything was fine until the Trump problem like I watched that in the middle
01:39:29
Steve-O
i mean, that's just like real life, man.
01:39:29
dirtycheeks
arrow
01:39:29
delta slim
Fucking Steve ruined it.
01:39:32
Steve-O
but Everything was fine until the Trump prophecy.
01:39:35
dirtycheeks
it really was was like humming along like oh yeah this is cool it's kind boring
01:39:36
Steve-O
Okay.
01:39:40
delta slim
The fact that people like like, people like, love that movie too, and like, you know, gave it a good score is like insane.
01:39:46
T-Bag
Well, I mean, it's not a good score, right?
01:39:46
Steve-O
oh
01:39:48
T-Bag
It's like a 31% user score? Yeah. Yeah. 120 Days of Sodom?
01:39:51
Steve-O
User score, yeah.
01:39:51
dirtycheeks
Yeah, something like
01:39:52
T-Bag
Yeah.
01:39:52
Steve-O
There are like a handful of critic reviews and they're all like the dirt worst.
01:39:53
delta slim
And it's not even like, yeah, it's not like, uh, yeah, it's not like Cannibal Holocaust or like, what's that other movie?
01:39:59
T-Bag
Yeah. Well...
01:40:01
delta slim
Solo? Have you seen that? Yeah. It's not like that shit. It's like, this is like,
01:40:06
dirtycheeks
that. That's like interesting. This is just propaganda.
01:40:09
T-Bag
yeah
01:40:12
T-Bag
yeah
01:40:13
dirtycheeks
It's like i'd I run into it and I'm like, ooh, good lord.
01:40:13
delta slim
Oh my God.
01:40:13
T-Bag
well
01:40:16
DeeBo
Yeah, congrats.
01:40:16
dirtycheeks
This is awful.
01:40:18
delta slim
Oh my God. it just oh
01:40:19
dirtycheeks
Well, folks, that was another
01:40:22
T-Bag
That's another March badness, man.
01:40:23
dirtycheeks
March Madness in the books. Number two, Steve O'tieri is the winner of this
01:40:26
T-Bag
God damn.
01:40:29
T-Bag
Congratulations, Steve. that is a
01:40:30
DeeBo
congrats
01:40:31
T-Bag
That is the meanest thing you've ever done to another person.
01:40:36
Steve-O
feel like a ah real bastard.
01:40:38
dirtycheeks
just a movie.
01:40:38
T-Bag
I'm not... Steve, Steve, Steve. I'm only kidding, man. It's all a good fun.
01:40:42
dirtycheeks
It's just a movie.
01:40:43
T-Bag
It's a competition.
01:40:43
delta slim
ay
01:40:43
Steve-O
No, no, believe me, I recognize this.
01:40:44
dirtycheeks
It's just a movie.
01:40:44
T-Bag
We were going to be... Okay. All right.
01:40:46
Steve-O
Like, I was sitting here beaming while Chris was tearing that movie into asshole.
01:40:46
T-Bag
ah
01:40:46
dirtycheeks
It's just a movie.
01:40:51
dirtycheeks
was
01:40:52
T-Bag
Because you're like, I won.
01:40:53
Steve-O
I was like, I did it.
01:40:53
T-Bag
God damn it.
01:40:54
Steve-O
This is my chance.
01:40:56
delta slim
I was waiting for Chris to be like, but actually it was a well, it was really well put together.
01:40:56
Steve-O
i was the golden goose.
01:41:00
delta slim
The movie and the cinema, the cinematography was good.
01:41:00
Steve-O
You know, the composition was fine.
01:41:00
DeeBo
but
01:41:03
T-Bag
was good.
01:41:03
dirtycheeks
It literally looked like a Neil Breen movie.
01:41:04
DeeBo
I mean, I disagree.
01:41:04
delta slim
Score was good.
01:41:05
Steve-O
Decent sound design.
01:41:05
DeeBo
i disagree with the message, but you know, overall, uh,
01:41:06
dirtycheeks
It looked and acted like a Neil Breen movie. Like, no, the actual film.
01:41:10
T-Bag
i and And you know, Steve, I'm giving you a lot of shit, but it's just because I'm salty, that's all. like I literally picked a movie that I knew contained really offensive Italian stereotypes and made them watch that. and You just, you know, you went one step beyond, that's all.
01:41:26
Steve-O
I saw you put Little Italy and I went, that motherfucker crossed the line.
01:41:29
T-Bag
hey
01:41:32
T-Bag
What's really funny to me is that everyone was afraid of the apple and no one was afraid of Little Italy.
01:41:37
DeeBo
Yeah, I didn't, ah you know.
01:41:39
delta slim
I thought literally it was alright.
01:41:39
DeeBo
Yeah,
01:41:39
T-Bag
Because you're like, you guys were going to...
01:41:41
delta slim
It's kind of just there, You know?
01:41:41
Steve-O
ah
01:41:42
T-Bag
Yeah.
01:41:45
T-Bag
Right.
01:41:45
DeeBo
yeah yeah, kind of just there, you know. Yeah.
01:41:48
T-Bag
Right.
01:41:48
dirtycheeks
No, it's so it's so unoffensive and unoriginal.
01:41:48
delta slim
know
01:41:51
dirtycheeks
Like, the Apple's really kind of original.
01:41:53
T-Bag
i I don't know, man. I'm only a quarter Italian and I was pretty offended by a lot of the stuff in Little Italy, I'm being honest.
01:42:00
DeeBo
You know, that's too much hanging with Paul, Tim. That's... Yeah.
01:42:03
T-Bag
Yeah, that's that's true. I talk to Paul too often.
01:42:06
dirtycheeks
ah I'm kind of used to it with Italian stereotypes, I'm honest.
01:42:09
DeeBo
Yeah.
01:42:09
dirtycheeks
Like, that shit is, like, the easiest.
01:42:09
Steve-O
one
01:42:10
DeeBo
If they're not there, it's weird.
01:42:12
dirtycheeks
Yeah, the easiest don't know in stereotyping existence.
01:42:12
DeeBo
i don't I don't...
01:42:14
T-Bag
yeah
01:42:15
DeeBo
Yeah.
01:42:17
dirtycheeks
Wow.
01:42:17
T-Bag
Ah, shit.
01:42:18
dirtycheeks
You guys have done yourselves.
01:42:18
Steve-O
Well, here, can I throw something in you guys?
01:42:20
T-Bag
Yeah.
01:42:21
Steve-O
if If we are going to completely retool this, maybe we figure out a time to bring this back maybe later even this year.
01:42:27
dirtycheeks
Ooh.
01:42:27
delta slim
Yeah, we can do... We get need a good name.
01:42:28
T-Bag
See, I, uh, yeah, I love this.
01:42:28
DeeBo
Yeah.
01:42:32
delta slim
We need a good name for maybe Summer Showdown.
01:42:36
dirtycheeks
Summer flop. Summer flop.
01:42:38
delta slim
Or ah Summer of Sloth.
01:42:39
Steve-O
some rose long
01:42:40
T-Bag
Some are a flop.
01:42:42
DeeBo
Nasty November, dude.
01:42:43
dirtycheeks
Sequel summer slop.
01:42:45
DeeBo
There it is.
01:42:46
Steve-O
o
01:42:47
dirtycheeks
Summer sequel slop. Any combination there.
01:42:49
Steve-O
but so um There's so many S's right there.
01:42:50
dirtycheeks
Sloppy sequel summer.
01:42:51
Steve-O
There's a lot. If you're listening to this and you're like, what the fuck? What did I just listen to? ah Then you give us some ideas. you know throw Don't just sit there tugging it. you know
01:43:03
dirtycheeks
Slop it up for us, fellas.
01:43:05
Steve-O
Slop it up. Put some slop in the pot.
01:43:07
dirtycheeks
get us Get us nice and sloppy. We want we want shit. We want pure shit.
01:43:11
T-Bag
And if this is the first time you're listening to the podcast, ah you should have started with a different episode.
01:43:16
delta slim
Yes.
01:43:17
Steve-O
I thought this was anti-fanboy.
01:43:19
dirtycheeks
Nah, we're getting all the Apple fans now.
01:43:22
Steve-O
Hey.
01:43:22
T-Bag
Hey, there's ah there's ah there's a community of them.
01:43:25
dirtycheeks
Yeah, I know.
01:43:26
Steve-O
Hey.
01:43:27
dirtycheeks
I'm not surprised.
01:43:28
DeeBo
Tins the treasurer, dude.
01:43:29
Steve-O
Wait, wait. Hold on. Are you telling me there's Galatia Chill episode right the same week as Sinners came out and they didn't even talk about it?
01:43:38
DeeBo
Yeah.
01:43:38
Steve-O
What the fuck?
01:43:39
dirtycheeks
i We're talking about bad movies.
01:43:44
dirtycheeks
That's it, okay?
01:43:45
Steve-O
that's just the That's just the people who are excited for a new Galadian chill. What the fuck?
01:43:49
dirtycheeks
Are we...
01:43:49
Steve-O
I thought he was going to talk about the good movies this week.
01:43:51
delta slim
Yeah, what's next? We're doing Galani and Paws next?
01:43:55
dirtycheeks
What?
01:43:55
DeeBo
yeah
01:43:56
dirtycheeks
Glideon pause?
01:43:57
DeeBo
Movies that made Chris feel something.
01:43:58
dirtycheeks
I kind of want to talk about Sinners in the next episode, if I'm honest.
01:43:59
delta slim
Sex?
01:43:59
DeeBo
Oh.
01:44:01
Steve-O
Yeah, you need you need to class it up in the next one.
01:44:02
T-Bag
Yeah.
01:44:04
dirtycheeks
I like that movie quite a bit. I want to talk about it.
01:44:07
T-Bag
I haven't seen it.
01:44:08
DeeBo
no
01:44:08
T-Bag
I need to get to an IMAX theater.
01:44:09
delta slim
I mean, we'll probably talk about it next week on Anti-Fanboy though, right?
01:44:11
DeeBo
Yeah.
01:44:12
Steve-O
Yes, so...
01:44:12
dirtycheeks
Hell yeah.
01:44:13
DeeBo
Where'd I go, dude?
01:44:14
delta slim
Wait, Steve, have you seen it yet?
01:44:14
Steve-O
Make sure you come back. I have not seen it. I've heard such amazing things.
01:44:16
delta slim
Go see it.
01:44:17
DeeBo
Oh, you dirty...
01:44:18
Steve-O
I need to.
01:44:19
delta slim
Go see it. Tonight.
01:44:21
DeeBo
Yeah, go right now.
01:44:21
dirtycheeks
one of the best One of the best scenes I've seen in the past, I'd say, year.
01:44:21
Steve-O
go see it now.
01:44:27
delta slim
like 10 years.
01:44:28
dirtycheeks
Yeah.
01:44:29
DeeBo
yeah
01:44:29
delta slim
I mean, I don't know.
01:44:30
dirtycheeks
It's a really fucking great scene in that movie.
01:44:30
delta slim
We'll see.
01:44:31
DeeBo
Yeah.
01:44:32
dirtycheeks
That is just...
01:44:32
DeeBo
I wish it was universally loved.
01:44:32
delta slim
Hmm.
01:44:33
dirtycheeks
hello Original movies are back.
01:44:34
DeeBo
Yeah, I really...
01:44:35
Steve-O
So movies are back.
01:44:35
delta slim
Oh, man.
01:44:36
Steve-O
We're saying movies are back.
01:44:36
delta slim
I can feel.
01:44:37
DeeBo
Dude, um you know what?
01:44:37
delta slim
I think so, man. Coogler's back, maybe?
01:44:38
DeeBo
You know what? I will say this. i had been pretty down on movies this year.
01:44:46
dirtycheeks
Me too.
01:44:46
DeeBo
And Chris and I, we were eating some pizza right out of Steve's house. ah Like, right in front of Steve's house, basically. Steve said he he wasn't going to come because he was too busy throwing up.
01:44:56
dirtycheeks
He's barfing everywhere.
01:44:57
Steve-O
Well, legit, I ate a bad sandwich, was throwing up, and I got a message aligned with a picture of two people already at the restaurant.
01:44:57
DeeBo
Yeah. He said, I'm barfing. I can't be.
01:45:05
DeeBo
Yeah.
01:45:05
Steve-O
and Fucking stop what you're doing and come get pizza.
01:45:06
DeeBo
Yeah, we said, you don't.
01:45:08
Steve-O
I'm like, I am fucking naked, about to jump in the shower because I've thrown up all over myself.
01:45:08
DeeBo
We said, you don't have to. yeah
01:45:14
T-Bag
Jesus.
01:45:14
DeeBo
Chris left that part He didn't tell me you were naked.
01:45:16
dirtycheeks
yeah
01:45:17
Steve-O
Well, I kind of left it out, too.
01:45:18
DeeBo
Oh, my God.
01:45:18
Steve-O
I said I was throwing up.
01:45:19
dirtycheeks
No, he sent me a picture. He sent me a picture.
01:45:20
Steve-O
Yeah, I sent a picture back.
01:45:21
DeeBo
Yeah, we don't.
01:45:22
Steve-O
yeah
01:45:23
T-Bag
He was like, guys, I can't come.
01:45:23
DeeBo
you
01:45:24
Steve-O
you
01:45:24
T-Bag
I barfed to my dick. I gotta to go.
01:45:26
DeeBo
yeah like what we don't
01:45:26
T-Bag
my
01:45:26
Steve-O
ah It got in the hole.
01:45:26
dirtycheeks
That's a lot of barf.
01:45:28
Steve-O
it got in the hole, man.
01:45:30
DeeBo
It burns.
01:45:31
T-Bag
God.
01:45:32
DeeBo
No, no, but ah so Chris and I, we were we were hanging out and we were looking up movies for the next few months and I'll be honest, I have some hope.
01:45:41
dirtycheeks
Yeah, it's looking pretty peachy.
01:45:41
DeeBo
I was like, wow, there's like something, there's something pretty much every next month.
01:45:44
delta slim
What's coming out next month?
01:45:47
DeeBo
Well, I mean, you know, mileage may vary, of course, but you got,
01:45:50
delta slim
And when did you guys go get pizza? Glad I was invited. This is like the third time this has happened to me.
01:45:55
DeeBo
oh man.
01:45:55
Steve-O
It was Tuesday.
01:45:55
dirtycheeks
so
01:45:56
Steve-O
It was Tuesday. was Tuesday.
01:45:58
DeeBo
It was Tuesday.
01:45:58
dirtycheeks
It was Tuesday.
01:45:59
delta slim
Oh, I had a.
01:45:59
DeeBo
It was like,
01:46:00
delta slim
Oh, yeah, that's right. I had a.
01:46:02
DeeBo
Yeah, that's why we didn't invite you, dude.
01:46:03
delta slim
T-ball.
01:46:03
DeeBo
We knew. Yeah, we...
01:46:04
delta slim
No, the you guys. ah Somebody asked something about Tuesday and I said I had T-ball.
01:46:08
dirtycheeks
Actually, you know how it came up is I saw Devin driving around and I thought he got pulled over by the cops.
01:46:12
DeeBo
Yeah.
01:46:16
dirtycheeks
I was like, Devin, did you get pulled over, buddy?
01:46:18
DeeBo
Yeah, he's like, hey, are you are you Endeavor right now?
01:46:18
dirtycheeks
Yeah.
01:46:20
DeeBo
i was like, oh, actually funny. Yeah, I am. Did you get arrested? I'm like, no.
01:46:25
Steve-O
yeah
01:46:25
DeeBo
No.
01:46:26
dirtycheeks
I saw somebody in a Fiat get like, like pulled over by four cop cars.
01:46:26
Steve-O
yeah
01:46:28
DeeBo
and
01:46:30
dirtycheeks
i was like, Oh shit.
01:46:31
Steve-O
Did you you should be.
01:46:31
DeeBo
Yeah, i was like, ah no, no, that didn't happen to me.
01:46:32
dirtycheeks
Devitt's fucked. Devitt's fucked. That's what I said.
01:46:35
DeeBo
And then I was like, I'm hungry.
01:46:36
dirtycheeks
I drove away.
01:46:39
Steve-O
You should get arrested.
01:46:40
DeeBo
Yeah, you piece of trash. Oh, man. No, but we got ah you know Thunderbolts. That's the big one. That's the big popular one. And then we got ah Clown the Court Field.
01:46:54
delta slim
The MC... What are they calling it? The MCU side squad? Thunderbolts?
01:46:57
dirtycheeks
So we're getting, well, as far as this year is concerned, we're getting an Ari Aster movie, a Paul Thomas Anderson film.
01:46:57
DeeBo
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
01:46:58
T-Bag
What if?
01:47:03
dirtycheeks
ah but but but What else?
01:47:04
delta slim
Superman?
01:47:05
dirtycheeks
Superman. Boo.
01:47:08
DeeBo
the final destination movie got mission impossible Lilo and stitch friendship uh the friendship
01:47:08
delta slim
Fantastic Four?
01:47:09
dirtycheeks
That's like four. Mission.
01:47:13
dirtycheeks
Oh yeah. Friendship.
01:47:14
Steve-O
Oh, yeah.
01:47:16
dirtycheeks
That looks fucking great.
01:47:17
DeeBo
uh we're getting the the not the sequel but the a movie from the same guys that did uh let me in or no no uh talk to me talk to me yeah uh the people did talk to me uh we're gonna another hard movie from them
01:47:25
dirtycheeks
The Philippou brothers.
01:47:28
T-Bag
Oh, yeah.
01:47:33
DeeBo
i John Wick movie, something about... What the fuck's the ritual? It doesn't matter. um Yeah, we got some good stuff.
01:47:43
dirtycheeks
basically we got some good shit coming our way it's looking better and I'm excited for at least five movies coming out this year which you know that's pretty rare nowadays
01:47:51
DeeBo
Yeah.
01:47:54
DeeBo
I mean, listen, i'm seeing I'm seeing some things and I'm like, there's at least like seven or movies and like we're not even out of June yet, right?
01:48:02
dirtycheeks
yeah sure
01:48:03
DeeBo
like There's like seven movies that I'm like, I'm definitely going to go see that in the theater. ah Yeah, so it was just it was just nice, you know, because I've been umve been feeling pretty ah blue about about the state of things I like lately.
01:48:11
T-Bag
Yeah.
01:48:19
dirtycheeks
Usually, usually like January, February, you get like shit.
01:48:19
DeeBo
And I was like, okay, yeah.
01:48:25
dirtycheeks
Like that's pretty standard. Like it's the fuck you.
01:48:26
T-Bag
Yeah.
01:48:27
DeeBo
Yeah, yeah.
01:48:28
dirtycheeks
It's January.
01:48:28
T-Bag
It's that we're dumping this because we don't think it'll compete in any other market.
01:48:32
dirtycheeks
Now for it to go all the way into April, that's like, that was weird.
01:48:36
DeeBo
don't hurt.
01:48:38
dirtycheeks
Like I've never really experienced that. Usually you get like two months and then there's something good.
01:48:42
DeeBo
Yeah. And also the last few years, there was always like one or two things, even in January. That was like pretty fun.
Movie Industry Trends and Critiques
01:48:48
dirtycheeks
That's true. Like the things they would take chances on.
01:48:48
DeeBo
And, uh, yeah.
01:48:50
dirtycheeks
like
01:48:50
T-Bag
Right.
01:48:51
dirtycheeks
But I don't think those movies are being made anymore.
01:48:53
DeeBo
Yeah.
01:48:53
dirtycheeks
Like the movies they take chances on.
01:48:55
DeeBo
Yeah.
01:48:55
dirtycheeks
That's fine.
01:48:56
DeeBo
So, uh, my birthday movie guys, uh, we got two, two for here. We got heads of state, John Cena, Idris Elba. And, uh,
01:49:03
delta slim
mean That's a streaming movie though, right?
01:49:03
dirtycheeks
Oh boy.
01:49:05
delta slim
Yeah,
01:49:06
DeeBo
It might be, damn. Well, yeah.
01:49:08
dirtycheeks
They gotta headbutt each other.
01:49:10
DeeBo
Sorry, guys.
01:49:10
dirtycheeks
They gotta headbutt.
01:49:10
DeeBo
We got that, and we...
01:49:11
dirtycheeks
Oh, I watched. I did watch another movie.
01:49:13
DeeBo
Ooh, what'd you watch?
01:49:14
dirtycheeks
Speaking of streaming movies, I watched a movie called Havoc.
01:49:14
T-Bag
Oh.
01:49:18
DeeBo
Oh, yeah, I heard you poo-pooing it.
01:49:20
delta slim
I heard you shitting on it after ah Vicious said it was a really good movie.
01:49:22
T-Bag
didn't on it.
01:49:24
dirtycheeks
ah
01:49:25
Steve-O
Mm-hmm.
01:49:27
dirtycheeks
I don't know, man. i fucking, it, I was actually really excited for a new Gareth Edwards movie. I love the raid. I love the raid too. I even like apostle. I think that's a cool flick on Netflix. like Um,
01:49:40
dirtycheeks
But this was like his neck big new action movie. And man, it was like a flop. like Outside of two one really great scene, um everything felt sloppy, poorly edited.
01:49:52
delta slim
Like The Raid 2.
01:49:53
dirtycheeks
What?
01:49:54
delta slim
Like The Raid 2. I guess The Raid 2 is still good movie. It's just kind of over the top.
01:49:57
DeeBo
They're really two rules, dude.
01:49:57
dirtycheeks
It's yet... Raid 2 has like a collection of scenes that I really like. But you're right. It's not like it's not better than Raid.
01:50:05
delta slim
It's not The Raid. Yeah, it's not The Raid.
01:50:06
dirtycheeks
No.
01:50:06
delta slim
Redemption. Redemption.
01:50:07
dirtycheeks
Raid's like a masterpiece. um Yeah, just, I kind of expected something on that level. And i don't know, like Tom Hardy's not bad in it, but yeah yeah like I said, the editing's really bad.
01:50:21
dirtycheeks
Overuse of CGI and like specifically in every car chase. None of the cars are real. None of the crashes are real. Like it's, it looks terrible.
01:50:31
dirtycheeks
um And the club fight scene is so poorly shot. It's hard to know what's going on. But the cabin fight scene, I think that works the best. And it actually, it's the best scene in the movie and the only good scene in the movie.
01:50:51
dirtycheeks
The rest is just this boring, stereotypical cop drama.
01:50:58
dirtycheeks
Yeah, not interesting, really. I do not advise anybody watch this.
01:51:04
DeeBo
Wow, okay.
01:51:05
dirtycheeks
I say go go on YouTube.
01:51:06
T-Bag
wow
01:51:06
DeeBo
I really was, I was curious.
01:51:07
dirtycheeks
Devin, go on YouTube. Watch the cabin scene from Havoc. That's it.
01:51:11
DeeBo
Okay.
01:51:11
dirtycheeks
You're good to go.
01:51:12
DeeBo
Well, I watched about 30 minutes of Craven.
01:51:15
Steve-O
Graven the Hunter!
01:51:16
delta slim
Wait, before...
01:51:17
DeeBo
Watched about 30.
01:51:17
delta slim
Did you rage quit the movie, or...?
01:51:19
DeeBo
No, it was just, I was basically watching it because Jenny and I, Jenny and I had to go somewhere and I was like, I'll put this on while I'm like doing dishes and like, you know, cleaning up a little bit.
01:51:23
dirtycheeks
so handsome. oh
01:51:24
Steve-O
Grr! Grr! Grr!
01:51:33
DeeBo
And there's a lot of origin story in that movie, like where he's like teen Craven. I think like 20 of the 30 minutes that I watched were just like a fucking, a completely different actor being yelled at.
01:51:42
T-Bag
Ha ha
01:51:48
dirtycheeks
that It's basically like young Sheldon in the beginning, right?
01:51:51
Steve-O
Yeah, you watched the prequel, That's So Craven.
01:51:51
DeeBo
Yeah. I was, I was like, man, we're really.
01:51:55
T-Bag
ha ha ha.
01:51:55
dirtycheeks
ah
01:51:55
DeeBo
Yeah.
01:51:56
T-Bag
yeah
01:51:59
DeeBo
Yeah. I was just like, man, there's really a lot of, there's not a lot of craving in this movie called Craven. So I was craving some craving.
01:52:06
Steve-O
You were craving the Craven.
01:52:09
dirtycheeks
You're 30 minutes in, you're craving the craving? Something went wrong.
01:52:12
DeeBo
No, it just, he just keeps stabbing people with like the lion teeth that he keeps finding randomly. It's really weird.
01:52:19
Steve-O
don't know.
01:52:20
DeeBo
Actually. It's like, why why did these just keep hanging around?
01:52:22
dirtycheeks
That's kind of cool, I guess.
01:52:27
DeeBo
But ah yeah. So I don't know.
01:52:31
dirtycheeks
You know what you initially said?
01:52:31
DeeBo
Yeah. I saw sinners twice instead. it was a much better movie.
01:52:34
dirtycheeks
You know, and you initially said you were watching Craven, I thought you were going to say like, ah Jenny was working. So she just put that on to entertain me. It wouldn't bother me.
01:52:42
DeeBo
put it on like like I'm a child.
01:52:42
T-Bag
yeah
01:52:44
DeeBo
Went went in and checked on me in an hour. I'm
01:52:50
dirtycheeks
This stinks. Where's Craven?
01:52:53
DeeBo
bored. want a pizza. We'll get you a pizza. You just gotta watch 10 more minutes.
01:52:58
Steve-O
Oh,
01:52:59
DeeBo
oh Oh. Oh, there's blood. Sick. Oh, hell yeah.
01:53:04
Steve-O
oh he stabbed him with another lion tooth. Awesome.
01:53:06
DeeBo
Oh, man. He found another saber tooth. Sick. This is a good movie.
01:53:09
dirtycheeks
That's cool. I'm glad he's finding teeth.
01:53:11
DeeBo
Yeah. Yeah. I don't know. I don't think I've watched anything else and I'm sure there's something I totally forgot, but
01:53:17
dirtycheeks
Nope, neither.
01:53:20
Steve-O
I started watching The Pit on Max.
01:53:23
DeeBo
right. Okay.
01:53:24
Steve-O
That is basically, what if 24 was about an ER in Pittsburgh?
01:53:24
DeeBo
How?
01:53:24
dirtycheeks
that pit.
01:53:30
DeeBo
Yeah.
01:53:30
dirtycheeks
Yeah. That's what heard.
01:53:31
DeeBo
Not bad.
01:53:31
Steve-O
It is interesting.
01:53:32
DeeBo
Right.
01:53:33
Steve-O
It's not bad, um but it definitely does.
01:53:35
delta slim
Oh, Amir was talking about that show. Said it was good.
01:53:37
Steve-O
It's not bad. yeah I am definitely enjoying it. I don't think it is anywhere in the realm of like, you know, The Last of Us or, you know, Penguin, but still good.
01:53:40
DeeBo
I'm like three hours in.
01:53:45
delta slim
Penguin? Penguin?
01:53:48
DeeBo
Oh, yeah, that's those.
01:53:48
dirtycheeks
How many episodes is it?
01:53:51
Steve-O
Uh, you know, I don't know. I'm on like episode nine and it's still going.
01:53:54
DeeBo
Yeah.
01:53:54
Steve-O
They're on like, ah it starts at six.
01:53:54
dirtycheeks
Like how many hours in, how many, how long?
01:53:57
Steve-O
I'm at hour. I'm at like 2 PM to 3 PM. That was like the last one I watched.
01:54:00
dirtycheeks
So he's working a 12 hour shift.
01:54:02
Steve-O
He's, he's really working. There's Noah Wiley.
01:54:04
dirtycheeks
Damn.
01:54:07
T-Bag
Oh,
01:54:07
DeeBo
There's 15. This dude's rocking a 15-hour shift, dude.
01:54:09
Steve-O
It's a 15 hour spoilers. i thought he was going home soon.
01:54:11
dirtycheeks
You know, Tim, Tim, you should watch that and laugh at it. Cause it's probably not factual at all.
01:54:17
T-Bag
it's probably not remotely accurate, sure, but it'll be...
01:54:18
Steve-O
No, dude.
01:54:21
T-Bag
You know how I am with TV.
01:54:22
dirtycheeks
Yeah.
01:54:22
Steve-O
I was watching it with my mom and the only thing that she had a problem was, was the way they talk.
01:54:23
T-Bag
It's just not something that I...
01:54:28
Steve-O
She's like, people don't talk like this in a hospital, but like, it was like a lot of the machines and stuff were kind of like throwing her back. So she was like, can I turn this off for now?
01:54:37
T-Bag
Yeah.
01:54:38
Steve-O
But.
01:54:39
dirtycheeks
So it was like forced dialogue, like medical dialogue.
01:54:41
Steve-O
Yeah, there's a lot of like, they're like talking over patients and they're like fuck you. Fuck you, Barbarella. You don't even know how to do a fucking catheter.
01:54:47
dirtycheeks
Yeah.
01:54:50
DeeBo
Yo, man, Bob Arelli, though, man. That's so...
01:54:52
dirtycheeks
He better have a note from his dad.
01:54:53
DeeBo
Yeah.
01:54:55
T-Bag
Yeah.
01:54:55
DeeBo
yeah
01:54:56
dirtycheeks
Sounds like Mr.
01:54:57
Steve-O
got a note.
01:54:57
dirtycheeks
Conner.
01:54:58
Steve-O
You don't.
01:55:00
dirtycheeks
I'm trying to work on his body. Give me a note.
01:55:05
dirtycheeks
yeah ah Okay. I'll watch it. That sounds fun.
01:55:07
DeeBo
Yeah. that yeah It's really important that you watch. I will say, did did we all at least watch The Last of Us?
01:55:17
Steve-O
Yeah.
01:55:17
dirtycheeks
Oh, yes. Jesus Christ.
01:55:18
DeeBo
Yeah.
01:55:18
delta slim
Not tonight's episode, obviously.
01:55:20
DeeBo
Not tonight, definitely, but...
01:55:20
dirtycheeks
Not tonight.
01:55:20
Steve-O
Not tonight's episode two we're talking about.
01:55:23
DeeBo
Yeah.
01:55:25
delta slim
i mean, we could talk about that if you want.
01:55:25
dirtycheeks
Wow.
01:55:25
DeeBo
They did it. We pulled the trigger, fellas.
01:55:27
Steve-O
They did it. The bastards did it.
01:55:27
delta slim
Or we can... I mean, we could save that for next...
01:55:29
dirtycheeks
Wow.
01:55:29
DeeBo
Yeah.
01:55:31
delta slim
Like, are we over time now?
01:55:32
Steve-O
You know what?
01:55:32
DeeBo
Well...
01:55:33
Steve-O
You know now. You know now that we watched it, so we're giving you time to watch it.
01:55:35
DeeBo
yeah.
01:55:38
Steve-O
Go watch it, and then we'll talk about it on Anti-Fanboy.
01:55:38
DeeBo
And then the episode after that.
01:55:38
dirtycheeks
Yeah, we're not going to say shit.
01:55:40
DeeBo
Yeah.
01:55:40
delta slim
You got a week.
01:55:40
dirtycheeks
We're not going say shit.
01:55:42
DeeBo
Yeah, get ready.
01:55:43
dirtycheeks
Big time moment. Big time event happened.
01:55:46
DeeBo
Big time kisses, dude. Too much kissing going on.
01:55:47
dirtycheeks
Everybody gets kissed.
01:55:48
Steve-O
Big time kisses.
01:55:49
dirtycheeks
Everybody gets kissed.
01:55:52
DeeBo
Yeah. Kiss of death, baby.
01:55:52
dirtycheeks
Can't wait.
01:55:55
dirtycheeks
The infected would be a lot cooler if they just made out with everybody.
01:55:58
Steve-O
i mean, they kind of did in that one in season one.
01:56:00
dirtycheeks
I know. They should really push that more.
01:56:02
Steve-O
There was like that real like intimate moment and I was like, oh, fuck.
01:56:02
dirtycheeks
like
01:56:04
DeeBo
No, Chris. We don't need to...
01:56:06
delta slim
Now they're just trying to get through a chain link fence so hard that it rips their hand in half.
01:56:11
dirtycheeks
imagine an infected running up to you full force, but then it stops midway, grabs you, grabs you by the butt, holds on. Gives you a big old kiss.
01:56:18
DeeBo
it's by the butt.
01:56:18
delta slim
And says, check out this movie called The Trump Prophecy.
01:56:21
DeeBo
yeah but Yeah, I think he's the new stalker type and of creepy.
01:56:21
Steve-O
Yo, these movies totally gonna rip.
01:56:24
T-Bag
Yeah.
01:56:25
delta slim
Watch this!
01:56:26
dirtycheeks
That's all i got infected.
01:56:26
delta slim
No!
01:56:29
Steve-O
An orb came out of my bed and said, fucking Trump's gonna be president?
01:56:34
dirtycheeks
Everybody's got orbs, right?
01:56:34
Steve-O
The fuck? The Apprentice, man?
01:56:37
dirtycheeks
I'm not the only one.
01:56:41
dirtycheeks
You know, when I saw that o orb, I was like, been there.
01:56:45
DeeBo
I've had those orb dreams before.
01:56:48
dirtycheeks
I always get those, man. I just tell that orb to get
David Lynch Discussions
01:56:51
dirtycheeks
fucked and I go back to sleep like everybody else.
01:56:53
Steve-O
Hey, Chris. Hey, Chris. why are you saying you only worked on Avatar? You knew you made that movie.
01:56:58
dirtycheeks
Shut the fuck up, orb. I'm gonna fucking beat you up.
01:57:01
Steve-O
Chris, you were in the director's chair of that entire last Airbender movie, man.
01:57:05
dirtycheeks
tired of fucking sleep, orb!
01:57:08
Steve-O
Man, you kept forgetting all characters' names. What the fuck's the problem, man?
01:57:12
dirtycheeks
yeah but I'm getting you now!
01:57:12
T-Bag
what
01:57:13
dirtycheeks
And that's when I get the bat and I just beat him around of the room.
01:57:16
Steve-O
Oh, fuck.
01:57:16
dirtycheeks
He bounces around.
01:57:17
Steve-O
Oh, fuck. Oh, shit. Oh, fuck. Oh, shit. Hey, I voted for Trump.
01:57:21
dirtycheeks
yeah I know you, fucking idiot.
01:57:22
Steve-O
of Oh, fuck. Oh, shit.
01:57:23
dirtycheeks
You're an orb.
01:57:24
Steve-O
Oh, fuck.
01:57:25
dirtycheeks
Don't pay rent.
01:57:27
DeeBo
Dude, somebody needs to check on Sokka. Dude, that guy's voting for it. and don't like that guy's voting history.
01:57:32
dirtycheeks
Oh, fuck.
01:57:35
T-Bag
ah By the way, Chris, I did watch the entire credits of the Avatar movie and your name is not in it.
01:57:40
DeeBo
Wow, dude, you're a piece of shit.
01:57:41
Steve-O
ah You know, I saw I saw one person we know's name in there, but that's it.
01:57:42
delta slim
He watched the whole movie.
01:57:42
DeeBo
You know what?
01:57:45
Steve-O
I didn't see anybody else.
01:57:46
dirtycheeks
Yeah.
01:57:46
DeeBo
Liar confirmed, dude. Liar confirmed. Chris didn't even work on it.
01:57:49
Steve-O
No, don't think Chris is a liar.
01:57:49
dirtycheeks
He did.
01:57:50
Steve-O
I think it's just a they just fucking Hollywooded Chris.
01:57:51
dirtycheeks
They didn't credit me. God damn it.
01:57:55
Steve-O
What dango but the hell was the name of that kid with the sideburns?
01:57:55
T-Bag
They big time.
01:57:59
dirtycheeks
Fuck.
01:57:59
Steve-O
Bob Arelli?
01:58:01
DeeBo
Bob O'Reilly, he had a lot of studio notes.
01:58:03
Steve-O
He got a lot of notes.
01:58:07
Steve-O
Love that kid.
01:58:09
dirtycheeks
Hated him in class. That guy sucked.
01:58:12
Steve-O
Well, we will be back next week with...
01:58:12
dirtycheeks
I hate Barbaralee.
01:58:15
Steve-O
Anti-fanboy, but I'm excited for figuring out these these future Galanian chills.
01:58:16
DeeBo
All right, Chris.
01:58:21
dirtycheeks
Summer Sloth's coming.
01:58:21
DeeBo
Yeah. Yeah, Chris, do you have an idea of what ah what you're watching next?
01:58:24
Steve-O
SOS, Summer Slot.
01:58:25
DeeBo
Yeah.
01:58:26
dirtycheeks
What? i Like for my next Galanian chill?
01:58:27
DeeBo
Yeah, for your next GAC. Yeah.
01:58:31
dirtycheeks
Ooh. David Lynch.
01:58:32
DeeBo
You don't have to. Oh, that's.
01:58:34
T-Bag
Oh, bring me in, coach.
01:58:36
dirtycheeks
Yeah. That's the next one up.
01:58:37
T-Bag
Let me in on that one.
01:58:39
DeeBo
Hmm.
01:58:39
dirtycheeks
I've started it a little bit, but I'm going finish.
01:58:39
DeeBo
Hmm.
01:58:40
delta slim
I have, yeah, I started a little bit and I still haven't recovered from Eraserhead.
01:58:46
dirtycheeks
a
01:58:46
T-Bag
Yeah.
01:58:47
DeeBo
the
01:58:47
delta slim
So, um I'll get back in there.
01:58:48
T-Bag
The race you have really got to you, huh?
01:58:50
delta slim
I'll get back in there. Yeah, I think I should have listened to you and Sten, like, kind of save that one for last.
01:58:53
T-Bag
Yeah.
01:58:55
delta slim
But I was like, but it's so short and it's accessible.
01:58:55
T-Bag
Yep.
01:58:59
T-Bag
Right.
01:58:59
delta slim
Why do I just watch this now?
01:58:59
T-Bag
Well, you know.
01:59:01
Steve-O
We should definitely try and bring Stinn in and on that too, if you do that.
01:59:01
DeeBo
They have
01:59:03
dirtycheeks
Yeah, totally, dude.
01:59:04
delta slim
Nah, fuck Sten. What does he know about David Lynch? Not really anything at all.
01:59:07
Steve-O
The fuck does that guy know?
01:59:09
T-Bag
He's got a David Lynch coffee can in his house.
01:59:09
delta slim
Yeah.
01:59:12
Steve-O
Wow, so we should bring him in on a coffee episode.
01:59:15
T-Bag
Okay.
01:59:15
Steve-O
but That's fair.
01:59:15
T-Bag
That's fair. That's fair.
01:59:17
dirtycheeks
Got him, yeah.
01:59:18
delta slim
What does he even know?
01:59:18
dirtycheeks
Fucking love coffee.
01:59:20
Steve-O
What does that guy even know?
01:59:23
delta slim
Alright, you gotta pick the worst David Lynch movie out of all, out of his, yeah, that's just how it is.
01:59:23
Steve-O
What's the universe Stinn?
01:59:23
dirtycheeks
Yeah. I gotta pick the...
01:59:26
Steve-O
Wow. Oh, that'd be fucked up, dude. That's cold.
01:59:29
dirtycheeks
Inland Empire.
01:59:32
delta slim
It's just Blue Velvet.
01:59:33
Steve-O
Those rabbit shorts are are all right, though.
01:59:34
T-Bag
Um...
01:59:35
delta slim
that No, that's if Devin did it. It would be Blue Velvet, because he hated Blue Velvet.
01:59:38
dirtycheeks
Actually, the best David Lynch movie are those weird shorts he made about his neighbor that would scream at him occasionally. They're like poorly animated.
01:59:48
dirtycheeks
and it's just him like... ra That's how his neighbor sounds. And he farts and burps all the
01:59:53
delta slim
I told you, I have a i have ah ah photo book of David Lynch's that was published, and it's just him taking pictures of snowmen, like melted snowmen across America.
02:00:03
dirtycheeks
time. Yeah.
02:00:06
delta slim
And it's kind of weird, but like I was going to send it to Stinn as a gift, but um it's worth a lot of money now that David Lynch is dead.
02:00:17
delta slim
I got it for like $15 a couple years ago, and it's going for like $400, $500 now.
02:00:20
Steve-O
Mm-hmm.
02:00:22
T-Bag
Wow. So it's the entire snowman collection?
02:00:23
delta slim
And it's like... a Yeah, but it's like... it's Dude, it's like 15 pages long, and it's like the size of an iPad mini. Like, it's really small and like...
02:00:31
T-Bag
Yeah.
02:00:33
delta slim
But it's just like... It's just black and white film photos of of snowmen in front of houses.
02:00:36
T-Bag
Yep. Now, I've got an art book of his called Someone Is In My Home, and I think it has ah some of the snowmen. It definitely has some of the snowmen, but not all of them, I think.
02:00:46
delta slim
really? Really? Oh, man. That's probably worth a lot, too.
02:00:50
dirtycheeks
And I'm going to quote his monologue about the eye.
02:00:51
delta slim
Just send it to Stinn.
02:00:52
T-Bag
No.
02:00:53
delta slim
He's got a coffee. He's got a coffee cup.
02:00:54
T-Bag
No, I'm also a David Lynch fan. I'm keeping my goddamn book.
02:00:56
delta slim
He's got a coffee mug. Do you have a coffee mug, David Lynch?
02:00:57
T-Bag
ah it's an it's an It's a can. It's not a coffee mug. I have multiple Twin Peaks mugs.
02:01:01
delta slim
Wow.
02:01:02
T-Bag
I don't have a a can of an empty can of David Lynch brand coffee.
02:01:07
dirtycheeks
Well, either you, you or Stinn are going to have to give the eye of the duck speech that David Lynch gave at some point.
02:01:07
Steve-O
Chris.
02:01:14
dirtycheeks
Did you ever hear that, Tim?
02:01:15
T-Bag
yeah the Yeah, he says that the like ah every film has a a moment that unlocks your understanding of it.
02:01:19
Steve-O
The voice.
02:01:21
T-Bag
And to understand a duck, you have to look into its eyes.
02:01:23
Steve-O
You got to do that.
02:01:24
dirtycheeks
Yay.
02:01:24
Steve-O
You got to do the voice, Tim.
02:01:26
T-Bag
Oh, man, i'm not not I'm not prepared to do it.
02:01:28
delta slim
see Yeah, good thing Stinn just intrinsically sounds like him. Anyway.
02:01:35
T-Bag
Kind of.
02:01:36
delta slim
So he can do the voice.
02:01:38
dirtycheeks
He just needs to scream more and be more abrasive.
02:01:40
T-Bag
I need to watch more Gordon Cole scenes and really lock in on the voice.
02:01:40
dirtycheeks
Nailed it. All
02:01:42
Steve-O
Yeah.
02:01:47
dirtycheeks
right, guys. Well... I guess that wraps it up for our episode of Galanian Chill, March badness style. um Next Galanian Chill is going to be on David Lynch. And up until then, check us out at Anti-Fanboy because we're gonna be talking about lots of shit coming up.
02:01:58
delta slim
Hmm.
02:02:03
dirtycheeks
Yeah. Enjoy.
02:02:08
DeeBo
Mm-hmm.
02:02:09
delta slim
David Launch.