Become a Creator today!Start creating today - Share your story with the world!
Start for free
00:00:00
00:00:01
The Birthday Episode where i turn 21 (again!)
58 Plays6 months ago
As a Mom, how do you celebrate your birthday? How does it differ from when you were in your 20's? I recently clebrated the 27th anniversary of my 21's birthday and it was full of appointments and meetings and mom life things. We may not party like it's 1999 anymore, but we can still have a great day even in the chaos of motherhood - laughing together at the insanity!
Recommended
Transcript
Introduction to the Birthday Episode
00:00:01
smandere1
Hello, and welcome back to another episode of Mom Tabulous. I'm your host, Charla Mander. This is going to be short, but it's the birthday episode. As I'm filming this, yesterday was my birthday.
Moms Making Kids Feel Special
00:00:14
smandere1
and I don't know about you moms, but you know I go out of my way to make sure that my kids feel special on their birthdays or their school promotions or you know Easter or Christmas, whatever holidays you celebrate. like I'm sure you go out of your way to make your kids feel special. whether
00:00:36
smandere1
cost a lot of money or not right but just to feel special and loved and and moms don't get that no one cares no one cares the kids aren't going to stop fighting just because it's your birthday right and i want to preface this by saying it was a fine day my birthday was fine it was a fine day But do you remember when you were like a kid or even in your twenties, right? And your birthday was a big deal. It was a whole thing. You partied all month. I celebrated my first month. We would go clubbing. We'd go out. Everybody's happy birthday. And And like yesterday, I had a lot of messages on Facebook.
00:01:20
smandere1
And I haven't even checked them it's because it's like, happy birthday. And I'm like, thanks.
00:01:28
smandere1
And I was saying to someone, I feel like, I feel like, i I think I was telling my husband, I feel like it's just that there's no, I mean, I guess 50 would
The Evolution of Birthdays
00:01:41
smandere1
be a milestone, right? I celebrated, I don't celebrate birthdays really. I celebrate anniversaries. So I i say I had the 27th anniversary of my 21st birthday.
00:01:51
smandere1
Where's the anniversaries? There's more anniversaries now than there was the 21st birthday. But I feel like there's more milestones. I mean, there's 50. 50 would be a milestone. And then like, what's up to 100? What's up? I mean, I got to wait 50 years for another milestone, right?
00:02:08
smandere1
you remember like 10 was like yay double digits 13 was like was like I'm an adult I can vote and I can do what I want my parents can't ground me anymore and then there was 21 like I can drink legally like right like all these exciting things in the 30s like I'm an adult um pretty right I'm right and now it's like what What is so exciting about turning 48? I mean, I'm laughing at myself because it sounds ridiculous, but maybe you feel like me. Maybe you're like, I don't know. what what What's the big deal?
00:02:51
smandere1
What's the big deal? I didn't understand. i used I had, you know, my mom's friends and, you know, be like, I'd be like, happy birthday. And they were like, oh, thanks. It's just another day. And I was like, no, it's your birthday. It should be special. And they were like, well, you know, but I'm getting there. I'm getting there and I'm understanding. And it's like, you know, so I mean, you got to make your own special.
The Reality of Birthdays as a Mom
00:03:11
smandere1
The kids aren't going to stop fighting just because it's your birthday. They're not going to magically clean their room because it's your birthday. It's not going to. You know, there's not going to make a difference. Are there toddlers? Are there teenagers? It's not their birthday. They don't care. I mean, I got happy birthdays. I got hugs. I got, you know, a card and gifts and rape. But like, I think I was waiting all day for this, like, special something.
00:03:41
smandere1
And, you know, and instead I was in, you know, an IEP meeting, the end of the year IEP meeting, and I was, I had someone, someone had something, a potluck at school I had to bring food for. you know, the class ah after school, you know, circus class, that Sorella had to go, you know, and then, you know, and and, and then we finally, you know, made it to dinner, right? And then we got home and then I think I finally opened a gift, right? um But like, you know, it's okay, it's mom life, it's adulting, right? But it's also like, ah do you I think I just want to know, do you feel the same way?
00:04:17
smandere1
Like, do you
What Makes Birthdays Special?
00:04:18
smandere1
feel the same as me? Like, are you at a point with birthdays where you're still celebrating the whole birth month? Or are you at a point where you're like, meh?
00:04:31
smandere1
It's a very weird place to be because I never thought I'd be that way with a birthday. I always thought I'd be like, yeah, it's my birth month. I'm always going to celebrate. We're going to go out. We're going to have fun. It's going to be a big deal. It's a whole thing. And yesterday I was like, it just didn't feel like a birthday. And then I was like, well, what is a birthday supposed to feel like? What would it mean to me to feel like a birthday? What does that look like? What does that feel like? And I really can't name it. I can't, I think for me, it would be like, like if I had a client feeling this, my question would be, well, what would that special feeling be for you? What would that, what what would that look like? So I'm asking myself and I'm like, you know, I feel like
00:05:18
smandere1
I mean, I got lots of happy birthdays, so it's not that no one said happy birthday and I had like a hundred and whatever messages on Facebook of happy birthday and private and Instagram and texts and phone calls. and So that's not it. That's not it. I think what I really needed was like the day off in a massage maybe. But mom life doesn't allow that, right? So, you know, we had lots of appointments scheduled and things to do and the kids are still in school. One of them was still in school and, you know, we had stuff to do. We had stuff to do. So, ah yeah, maybe maybe that's, you know, maybe I just needed a day off. So, you know, we're we're ah
00:06:00
smandere1
We'll get there next year. I'll try to plan no appointments on my birthday, but I don't know. what what What is it for you? I think this is my question is moms.
Finding Everyday Magic Beyond Birthdays
00:06:12
smandere1
What is it that makes you feel special and not just your birthday? right like Why does it have to be this day? Is it one day of the year? that because you know Is it two because then there's Mother's Day? and like but like What is it that makes you feel, and do does it have to be your birthday for you to feel that, right? It doesn't have to be a birthday for us to feel special. It doesn't have to be our birthday for us to feel important. It doesn't have to be my birthday for you to clean your room. It just needs to be a day, right? So what is it for you that makes you feel special and loved, that that extra oomph?
00:06:55
smandere1
on on your birthday, what is it? What is it for you? And do you feel that or or are you like me or you're like, wa want, want? Aside from like flying to Hawaii or something for your birthday, right? what What is it that would make you feel like you did in your twenties or when you were a kid and it was like your birthday was like this amazing thing that now I'm like, when is when is the amazing thing?
00:07:26
smandere1
Because kids, you know, kids feel the birthday all the time and adults maybe don't. Is this just, I'm a 48 and now I'm officially an adult. Is this what it is? Like officially I'm adulting? What is it? So I don't know, comment, message me, come out of the woodworks, call me, you know, let me know. What is it for you that makes you feel like, yeah, Today is my day. like Or do you are you able to do that for yourself every day? Because I really feel like we should do this for ourselves every day. right like Treat every day like it's your birthday. like If you want to walk around feeling magical on your birthday, awesome. And you should walk around feeling magical every day, not just because you were born. right But like we didn't have a choice in being born, but we have a choice every day to make it special, to make it epic, to make it fun. to
00:08:16
smandere1
you know to choose what the day's gonna be like. So
Conclusion and Listener Invitation
00:08:19
smandere1
maybe that's it. Maybe I'm choosing all my days to be something and then the birthday hits and it's like, well, I'm already choosing this, you know? um Maybe that's it. Or maybe I'm just getting old. Either way, I will see you in the next episode. Thanks for listening. Let me know what is it that makes you feel that extra rainbow glowy unicorn sparkly special on any given day. Bye.