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00:00:01
Not your Mama's episode
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Does your relationship with your own mother affect how you mom?
Have you noticed you are turning into your mother - for good or not as good?
How do the things you learned form your mom affect your kids as you raise them?
And how can you break generational patterns you may not even realize you have and parent with more love?
Join me and Suzanne Marambio, author or Journey from the Ego to the Heart Centre as we talk about our own mothers and how they shaped our journey as moms.
Journey from the Ego to the Heart Centre is available at:
https://www.dymocks.com.au/journey-from-the-ego-to-the...
https://pegasuspublishers.com/.../journey-from-the-ego-to...
https://www.barnesandnoble.com/.../journey.../1146983027
https://agendabookshop.com/.../journey-from-the-ego-to...
https://www.thenile.com.au/.../journey-from.../9781837943791
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Transcript
Introduction to Suzanne Marambio
00:00:01
Sharla Mandere
Hello and welcome back to Momtabulous. I'm Sharla Mandere, your host, and with me today is Suzanne Marambio in Melbourne, Australia.
00:00:11
Sharla Mandere
She's a mom of two and is a debut writer and seeker of truth dedicated to guiding others on their journey of self-discovery and transformation.
Insights from 'Journey from the Ego to the Heart Center'
00:00:21
Sharla Mandere
Her book, Journey from the Ego to the Heart Center, there it is if you're watching the video, um offers profound insights into shifting from a mind-driven existence to a heart-centered way of living.
00:00:35
Sharla Mandere
With a passion for personal growth, spirituality, and emotional healing, Suzanne's work inspires readers to break free from limiting beliefs and embrace their authentic selves. Through her writing, she empowers others to cultivate inner peace, love, and a deeper connection with themselves and the world around them.
Impact of Sri Lankan Heritage and Mother's Influence
00:00:53
Sharla Mandere
Welcome, Suzanne.
00:00:54
Suzanne Marambio
and Thank you. That was a great introduction and I'm looking forward to our chat today to talk about motherhood and conscious parenting and, yeah, what led to this book to be written.
00:01:08
Sharla Mandere
me too. I'm so excited you're here. And I love, I love this. We were just talking before we were recording about motherhood across the globe, about how so much is similar, no matter where you are. And, and I, I love that. So go ahead and tell the reader or the readers, the listeners, the readers, the listeners a little, you know, about your, your, your own journey and your story.
00:01:29
Suzanne Marambio
Yes, so I'm based in Melbourne and I've got parents of Sri Lankan descent. So I think that has also contributed to the type of mothering that I had.
00:01:39
Suzanne Marambio
My mother was a very nurturing, the classic traditional wife that would get up at four five o'clock in the morning and cook our curries. And i was i was grown up i was growing up with a home that was very, it was a lovely home. Like it was lively. I could have hobbies and I could explore sports and dancing and she was the classic mum that would sew my
Grief, Acceptance, and Parenting Renewal
00:02:04
Suzanne Marambio
costumes.
00:02:04
Suzanne Marambio
She was very nurturing but I could always tell sometimes she was a bit quiet in if there was something that she disagreed with she would probably keep it to herself and I knew that that was probably holding her back. So there was a bit of stoicism in her as well.
00:02:21
Suzanne Marambio
But as a mother for me, like if i hurt myself or anything like that, she would always be there to console and to, you know, look after me. um But I noticed as I became a mother, there were certain traits that I have picked up from her, that nurturing, um that divine presence that she had in my life.
00:02:40
Suzanne Marambio
um But what happened in 2012, she got quite ill with cancer and unfortunately she left the earth plane very young too, 64. sixty four So that was a bit of a shock for myself as well as the family and having to transition um into a life where, okay, I don't have that nanofigure for my own children.
00:03:02
Suzanne Marambio
how do I show up in that way and still give that mothering sort of aspect of her? So the good thing is that she's still around us in memory and we talk about and we laugh about her. Her name was Dawn.
00:03:15
Suzanne Marambio
So we always have ongoing jokes about Dawny and I have a lot of her mannerisms. so I think for me growing up in that household, because I've watched her do a lot like the housework and the cooking and the cleaning that has obviously become a part of me but as I became a mother and I was working i was like how did she do all this like this is a lot of work and she never complained like she would never complain and I'm like I'm complaining because this is not happening for me and I remember at one stage after she passed away took
00:03:49
Suzanne Marambio
A good 12 months. I went through a lot of grief with her, her passing and that loss and lot of resentment, like why was that diagnosis not ah detected? Like the second, you know, ah um doctor, why wasn't there an an option to look at a different path?
00:04:05
Suzanne Marambio
to sort of do therapy and then I was sort of bargaining if I had known earlier I could have done this with her and, you know, you go through all those stages. But then finally when I got to acceptance, life then became different because I said, okay, I need to look at
Self-Care and Conscious Parenting
00:04:20
Suzanne Marambio
my life.
00:04:20
Suzanne Marambio
ah Do I want to sit in this space pit of motherless daughter feeling sorry for myself and I'm missing out and she's missing out on these children or do I see it in a new light and say okay how can I bring those aspects of her her essence into my life and bring that joy into what I do as a mother and to have the laughter and and the fun that she did have for us when we were growing up.
00:04:46
Suzanne Marambio
And so um I found that, okay, once I got to the place of acceptance and then we started just talking about her and bringing her back into our life in memory, then it was like, okay, there's no need to really miss it. Yes, I can miss her physical form, but in a non-physical way.
00:05:03
Suzanne Marambio
she's actually here. Like she's almost laughing with us sometimes. Like sometimes I get a big belly laugh and I'm like, yeah I know you're laughing with me. Like it's just like this, this humour that she used to have. And she had, she was very witty, but she had also had a very wicked sense of humour. So it's kind of cute, like knowing that she's here in that energy flow around us. But When I started going through my own early years of motherhood, I was getting a bit like, oh, this is really agitating and I can't juggle the balls in the air. can't be like my mum. This is not working for me.
00:05:36
Suzanne Marambio
And I just remember going, I don't want to be a dragon mum anymore. I don't want to be snappy at these children. They don't deserve that. That's just me not coping. And it was only when I started to look at well what are these options like maybe mindfulness. Everyone talks about it in 2014. It was a big buzzword.
00:05:54
Suzanne Marambio
And I remember, okay, I'm going to commit to this. I'm going to take up meditation. i'm going to see what ah what happens when I start to focus on the breath or when I start to witness my own thoughts. And I realize, wow, there's a lot going on in there. Like it's loud and it's it's triggering.
00:06:11
Suzanne Marambio
and you And that led into, okay, well, set up a self-care practice. What can you do, Suzanne, to show up as the best version of yourself? How can i be more present? How can I...
00:06:24
Suzanne Marambio
Check in within myself and realise, oh, these triggers are me. This has got nothing to do with my child playing up or being naughty. They're not being naughty. It's actually myself not being able to self-regulate.
00:06:36
Suzanne Marambio
I'm looking at them through the lens of that's a bad behaviour, but not realising they probably have an emotional need that needs to be met. And if I can't self-regulate and put myself in order and hold myself as the rock and, you know, hold it together, how can how can they? They're going to mirror me back, right?
00:06:55
Suzanne Marambio
So that was a lot of work I had to do over those last few years. And I discovered conscious parenting through Dr. Shefali and doing her courses and committing to that way of being with the aspects of my mum, the nurturing that, but also just having that sense of um emotional intelligence to think from a high aspect of heart wisdom, that started to shift. And then I started to enjoy motherhood, whereas before was just like, oh, this is a struggle. Like this is a hard slog. No one talks about this.
00:07:27
Suzanne Marambio
It's a hard gig. Once I got out of that mindset that it's not hard, it's just that I need to still work on myself. There's a lot of wounds and a lot of traumas that I'm still stuck in that I need to release and heal and forgive and move on.
00:07:41
Suzanne Marambio
then I could show up in that adult version that is present for these children and is the best version
Parental Influence on Motherhood Approaches
00:07:47
Suzanne Marambio
of myself. And so that was that that was ah good for seven, eight years I've been practising that. And now I have an 18-year-old who's now nearly a boy.
00:07:57
Sharla Mandere
Bye.
00:07:57
Suzanne Marambio
I should say a man. And I have a 14-year-old who's now in home education. so it's another thing I had to sort of shift my mindset out of, like does she need to stay at school because I did it? Maybe not. Maybe it's not her path.
00:08:12
Suzanne Marambio
Maybe I need to tailor ah a learning plan for her, the way her brain is wired and how she wants to see herself in the future, what her future self will be.
00:08:23
Suzanne Marambio
And so this is the work. I had to go inward to show up as this person that I am today and put it into a book to help other mums out there that are struggling because it's not something that we talk about when that baby's born.
00:08:38
Suzanne Marambio
No one actually whispers in the and says, okay, it's going to be a bit of a hard slog, but we're here to hold space for you because the village, you don't have the village anymore. We live far away from our family, some of us.
00:08:51
Suzanne Marambio
And if we're trying to work nine to five and keep up with the mortgage and still have the lifestyle of the, you know, the white picket fence, it's it's not easy. Something's got to give.
00:09:03
Suzanne Marambio
So, yeah.
00:09:06
Sharla Mandere
yeah oh thank you for sharing all that so much of what you said for me like we talked about this our stories are very similar you know my mom two years ago my dad ah two and a half years before that so my dad november of 2020 and he lived down the street and then my mom march of 2023 and and yeah there went our a big part of our village right and um
00:09:13
Suzanne Marambio
a
00:09:33
Sharla Mandere
and And we homeschool my youngest. And again, looking at what is that her path, you know?
00:09:38
Suzanne Marambio
Oh.
00:09:38
Suzanne Marambio
Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm.
00:09:38
Sharla Mandere
And and my dynamic with my mom was very different.
00:09:46
Suzanne Marambio
Mm-hmm.
00:09:46
Sharla Mandere
You know, it was complicated as a lot mother-daughter relationships are, but it's complicated. It was rocky, but I definitely miss her. my This is a funny story. we My kids were making a TikTok that was never gonna get shared.
00:10:02
Sharla Mandere
like Wearing it or whatever, but it was like this funny, I don't remember what it was. was like siblings fighting or whatever. My mom loved to be the center of attention. She was very like always wait center of attention.
00:10:14
Sharla Mandere
And so I watched this video back and I'm not kidding. Lights flickered that did not flicker when I, that I noticed when we were recording the video.
00:10:26
Sharla Mandere
And then this full on white. It's an orb, right? But a white circle.
00:10:32
Suzanne Marambio
who Oh, that's beautiful.
00:10:33
Sharla Mandere
Look, it's not dust because dust like goes
00:10:35
Suzanne Marambio
No, I know orbs. I've seen many of them. yeah no Yes, definitely.
00:10:40
Sharla Mandere
right in front of my kids and moves from the bottom of the screen diagonally up. And I was like, Ooh, that's my mom. Like I'm in the video. Um,
00:10:51
Suzanne Marambio
Oh, my goodness. Yeah, there's so much that we don't understand, and those orbs definitely hold spirit, 100%. um i hundred say
00:10:58
Sharla Mandere
It was very clear that it was not like, ah people could argue dust or that's just a...
00:11:03
Suzanne Marambio
No, dust doesn't do that movement. Yeah.
00:11:06
Sharla Mandere
No.
00:11:06
Suzanne Marambio
I've seen dust. You can see little speckles, but it orbits like a clear. you can see it with your own eyes.
00:11:11
Sharla Mandere
Yeah. And this thing goes, and it like gets bigger.
00:11:12
Suzanne Marambio
Hmm. Hmm.
00:11:14
Sharla Mandere
It comes from the back and comes up to the front, gets bigger. And like, it's crazy. I was like, oh, like it was insane. But I very, it was very clear. That's not my dad. That's not my grandparents.
00:11:25
Sharla Mandere
That was my
Motherhood as Service and Personal Growth
00:11:26
Sharla Mandere
mom. Like...
00:11:27
Suzanne Marambio
And you know it because you just know her essence, her personality. And I think that's, that's beautiful. Yeah.
00:11:33
Sharla Mandere
Yeah, it was very clear. So yeah, we were talking about the importance of, you know, your mom in your journey of motherhood, how important that dynamic in that relationship is to shape you one way or another.
00:11:47
Suzanne Marambio
but
00:11:48
Sharla Mandere
There are a lot of things aye in motherhood that are very opposite, right?
00:11:48
Suzanne Marambio
a That's true.
00:11:55
Sharla Mandere
Of like, well, I'm not going to do that. I'm not going to have my kids experience that from me. And then there's other ways where I'm like, I'm going to have their back in the way I know she had mine. Right. So it's very um interesting.
00:12:12
Suzanne Marambio
you do you sort of like have to witness what do you want to take and what do you want to say no that's not for me and I could see my mum did the full nine to five and I thought no that I can't do that I'm going to do part-time
00:12:12
Sharla Mandere
Yeah.
00:12:26
Suzanne Marambio
And I have my Friday off. I have shorter hours because I want to be able to manage it. I'm happy to do the traditional wife. I'm happy to own that. I don't mind doing that role, but I don't want to do it the way she did it because that it's tiring.
00:12:40
Suzanne Marambio
And it's just, I could see when you look at that, it's not a quality of life. You need to have a balance. And I'm being a fortunate position that I can do that. And I work mostly from home and, you know, she didn't get that opportunity. So,
00:12:54
Suzanne Marambio
I've been very lucky in that way to manifest what what what lifestyle do I want, whereas my work feels like a lifestyle, doesn't feel like I work, you know, in an office environment. it's a different pace of work and I get a lot of satisfaction out of that. But that's one thing I took away. I just thought, no, I can't do what she's done. That's just next level.
00:13:16
Suzanne Marambio
um But I do honour, you know, her recipes and I love the cooking that I learnt from her. But, yeah, there is just... certain things where you have to pull back and go, no, that's not for me.
00:13:26
Suzanne Marambio
and But I was fortunate. I had a really great relationship with her We were quite close.
00:13:32
Sharla Mandere
Yeah. Yeah. I mean, i think that's a good point too. right And I think like some of it is just times are different, right?
00:13:38
Suzanne Marambio
Yeah, times are different.
00:13:39
Sharla Mandere
Yeah.
00:13:39
Suzanne Marambio
Exactly. They didn't have those options and even childcare wasn't that available. Like I was through council care. There was some lady that she met that was looking after children across the road from the school. It was a totally different time in the 80s.
00:13:56
Suzanne Marambio
But she was a lovely lady and she looked after eight or ten kids and I was part of that range.
00:13:56
Sharla Mandere
Yeah.
00:14:00
Suzanne Marambio
But it was different times for our parents. They could they didn't take school holidays off It was just after school holiday programs.
00:14:08
Sharla Mandere
Yeah.
00:14:08
Suzanne Marambio
It's different, whereas I can take that option. Oh, yeah, I will take some leave. I want to grow up with my children doing those things.
00:14:15
Sharla Mandere
Yeah.
00:14:15
Suzanne Marambio
Yeah.
00:14:16
Sharla Mandere
Me too. It's important to me. And I think that is one thing I took, like my mom, cause she was a hairdresser. So her hours, she could just not schedule a client or whatever, you know, the field trip or whatever. And I just, it was always very important to me to be that mom too. So I'm like, I, you know, I'm the mom going on the field trips.
00:14:33
Sharla Mandere
I'm the mom driving the kids everywhere. I'm the mom, you know,
00:14:35
Suzanne Marambio
you're that one. Yeah.
00:14:36
Sharla Mandere
but Mom, you know, and, and my mom was very much like that too. That was just normal of like, everybody come over to the house and, you know, you need something.
00:14:41
Suzanne Marambio
that
00:14:46
Sharla Mandere
I'm your mom too. And even like when I was mad at a friend or whatever, and, and I'd be like, why, why are you letting her come over here? Because i am mad at her.
00:14:56
Sharla Mandere
my mom being like, well, she needed someone and her mom's not home and she needed, you know, and this, and I'm so upset, you know, like you're supposed to.
00:15:00
Suzanne Marambio
Yeah.
00:15:03
Suzanne Marambio
That's a beautiful quality to have because she sounds like she could hold compassion for people.
00:15:04
Sharla Mandere
Right.
00:15:09
Sharla Mandere
and yeah She did, she did. held a lot of compassion. She could also hold a grudge.
00:15:14
Suzanne Marambio
a So she had a bit of both.
00:15:18
Sharla Mandere
lot of things. Yeah, yeah.
00:15:21
Suzanne Marambio
But that's what makes her who who she was and then obviously you take some of those aspects and that's part of you, isn't it, in your blood, yeah.
00:15:29
Sharla Mandere
There was definitely things that I was like, I do, I want i want to do this. Like she did.
00:15:33
Suzanne Marambio
Hmm.
00:15:35
Sharla Mandere
But then there's definitely other things that's like, I will not. do that you know um so but i think that's normal a part of it shapes you know yeah yeah so let's talk about like how does that translate into like your own motherhood journey right and and raising your kids and we talked about um parenting with presence and like acting
00:15:40
Suzanne Marambio
and
00:15:44
Suzanne Marambio
Who you are. Yeah, for sure.
00:15:54
Suzanne Marambio
Oh,
00:16:02
Sharla Mandere
being of service, right? And how like motherhood, we kind of came this realization in our pre-call of like motherhood, like really is the ultimate act of service.
00:16:04
Suzanne Marambio
yeah.
00:16:10
Sharla Mandere
You are giving everything.
00:16:13
Suzanne Marambio
You do, you do And it's like I remember when the children were quite young. i mean, you look at it, it's it's the highest, like, profession you'll do. you don't get paid for it.
00:16:25
Suzanne Marambio
i mean, you the joy you get out of it is the exchange and watching this little person grow up. But I suppose I remember thinking, isn't it strange how we just walk out the hospital with this little newborn baby. we have no qualifications. We've done qualifications.
00:16:41
Suzanne Marambio
training in this area yet your own job you need to have a certificate or a degree or some sort of competence to show you're capable of this and we go home and then we're like now what it's like but it's the biggest responsibility to raise this child and it's and what I've learned
00:16:57
Sharla Mandere
Thank you.
00:17:02
Suzanne Marambio
through this motherhood, it's like, how can I show up? How can I be be better at this? It's like, I've read all the books and nothing was really gelling with me.
Heart-Centered Parenting Journey
00:17:11
Suzanne Marambio
I didn't want to do the naughty corner and the timeout. i was like, no, this is not my thing. But when I discovered, obviously, the conscious parenting by Dr. Shefali, I was like, yes, this resonates with me. Yes, I know that there's work, but I get the concept is parenting myself. I need to parent myself first.
00:17:28
Suzanne Marambio
And once I own it and resolve those little internal childhood ah wounds, then I can show up as the best version of myself for these children without judgment, seeing them as they are, honoring their essence, being more present, looking after myself, putting myself first, because actually I need to put the oxygen on myself.
00:17:28
Sharla Mandere
you
00:17:52
Suzanne Marambio
So I get up early, I do my meditation, I do whatever I need to do to get my self-care at a top level so that when um when they wake up for their day, I'm on and I'm ready rather than the opposite where we're just like, oh, give me a cup of coffee. That's not the first thing I think of. I'm focusing on my breath.
00:18:10
Suzanne Marambio
How can I stay grounded?
00:18:10
Sharla Mandere
Mm-hmm.
00:18:11
Suzanne Marambio
How can I stay present today? And then if there are moments where it goes spikes up and down, i can self-regulate and I know i need to go for a walk. I need to check out.
00:18:22
Suzanne Marambio
I need to listen to music or whatever it needs to be. So i think with the mothering journey, It's got better over time because I did the work in their foundation years while they were going through primary school.
00:18:34
Suzanne Marambio
So now I have a fantastic relationship with them. It's mature. It's respected between both parties. We have fun. We laugh. We can go out. And it's like I actually enjoy their company, whereas I look at other families where they've got teenagers and they actually complain and I'm like, I don't have that problem like ah because I don't know what it is. It's a different relationship that we have like because we've done the work in the early years. And I think when I started to work on myself, it starts to ripple to them because they start to see, oh, mum's showing up, mum's more present or she's aware when she's unconscious.
00:19:10
Suzanne Marambio
you can you You can roast me, doesn' it doesn't bother me because I can laugh at myself. My ego will just laugh with you. so And I think a lot of parents will never allow their child to say, oh, you knowre being unconscious. so I actually say, say it. If I'm actually unconscious, call me out on it because,
00:19:27
Suzanne Marambio
I need to step up. I've dropped the ball and that's okay. And I can show them that I'm student and the master at the same time, still learning. You know, no one's ever going to perfect it.
00:19:38
Suzanne Marambio
But if we can stay keep practising, and showing up, it starts to become part of your daily lifestyle. So I'm fortunate in that way, I've got a really strong bond with them.
00:19:50
Suzanne Marambio
And even like my daughter's overseas, someone will say to me, do you miss her? And I was like, no, I don't actually, because we're not enmeshed. She has her way over there now overseas with her nonna. But the beauty of digital technologies, you can FaceTime, you can video call. So I don't actually miss her in that sense, because I'm communicating all the time.
00:20:10
Suzanne Marambio
And I have so much trust that she's in safe hands and she's going to be okay. And there's going to be moments where where she'll be thinking, oh, what would I do, mum? I need my mum. But it's like this is part of growing up.
00:20:22
Suzanne Marambio
This is part of us. learning to live without each other and realise, oh, I can do it, you know. So, yeah, but motherhood has been definitely a different journey since taking on those personal goals of self-mastery.
00:20:39
Suzanne Marambio
If I didn't do the self-mastery um of working on releasing old traumas and just transforming as a better version of myself, I would have been stuck in that old drag and snappy getting angry and nagging i don't want to be like that that's not the best version of myself so yeah
00:20:59
Sharla Mandere
Yeah. think that's a really good point is like showing up as the best version of yourself. And then it teaches them to write how to react.
00:21:07
Suzanne Marambio
yeah yeah yes
00:21:08
Sharla Mandere
And there's definitely times that I'm like, this is not my best moment. Not at all. You reflecting that and which makes
00:21:15
Suzanne Marambio
But you can own it. And that's I think that's important for our children to see that sometimes we're not perfect. You know, I have my flaws. I always say I'm imperfectly perfect in every way because it's like okay. It's okay to own the flaws. That's what makes you who you are. That ego is also an aspect of you, the shadow.
00:21:34
Suzanne Marambio
But it's important not to let the ego mind be the parenting, like in the front of the parenting role.
00:21:39
Sharla Mandere
Yeah. Yeah. Yeah.
00:21:41
Suzanne Marambio
I try and come from more heart-centered wisdom. That's where I try and just balance it bit better because I was before, I was processing from my ego mind, like you have to do it this way. this is my expectation, you know, pointing the finger, in the judgment.
00:21:56
Suzanne Marambio
But when I learned to go, ah, back off, now see it from this lens, what would love do in this moment, there's a different tone to that. You drop into your heart.
00:22:07
Sharla Mandere
yeah I love that. What would love do in this moment? I love that. Yeah. Instead of like, well, what would my mom do or my mother?
00:22:16
Suzanne Marambio
Because love is, it neutralises, doesn't it?
00:22:16
Sharla Mandere
no yeah
00:22:18
Suzanne Marambio
That word alone, it's a powerful word.
Writing During the Pandemic and Personal Growth
00:22:22
Suzanne Marambio
Yeah.
00:22:23
Sharla Mandere
Yeah. Yeah. I love that. That's like the, the nugget and of, of the, what would love.
00:22:28
Suzanne Marambio
The golden nugget. Well, I say that in the book. I write a, probably dedicate about three chapters to conscious parenting and supreme self-care and talking about, you know, you've got to really work on the self.
00:22:43
Suzanne Marambio
Yeah. Yeah.
00:22:45
Sharla Mandere
Yeah. Yeah, totally. I love that. This has been so good. This has been like, i and i I think that nugget, like that's a good place to like get like, boom, mic drop. Is there, is there anything you want to share about your book real quickly?
00:23:01
Sharla Mandere
Can it help? Where can people find more info?
00:23:03
Suzanne Marambio
Yeah, this book. Okay. So in the States, so I think you've got a shop. It's called Barnes and Noble online.
00:23:09
Sharla Mandere
Yes.
00:23:10
Suzanne Marambio
Yeah. Okay. Yep. So you just type in journey from the ego to the heart center. Or you can put my name, Suzanne Morambio, will pop up. um And then the UK would be Pegasus Publishers, Waterstone.
00:23:23
Suzanne Marambio
Australia would be Dimmicks. And then worldwide, all the Amazon stores, they're pretty much holding it now. So it's it's printed to order, which is good. It's sort of like good for the environment, not just having all these books just printed sitting in store. But, yes, definitely go to Barnes & Noble for US listeners.
00:23:41
Suzanne Marambio
Yeah.
00:23:43
Sharla Mandere
Yeah.
00:23:44
Suzanne Marambio
And maybe yeah so the book, it takes you on the journey where I started to write this during um the pandemic lockdown. Melbourne was probably the most locked down city. So we had a lot of time on our hands. So I just, to be honest, it was like a guidance. It was like this inner calling.
00:24:01
Suzanne Marambio
You need to write a book. You need to write a book. And I was just like in resistance. I was like, what am I going write about? don't what I'm going write about. And then one morning I woke up. And I just put pen to paper and I said, all right, where would it begin if I was to write a book?
00:24:15
Suzanne Marambio
And I go, right, starts where mum passed away. and mums um My mother's sudden death.
00:24:19
Sharla Mandere
Thank you.
00:24:20
Suzanne Marambio
Yes, that's where it begins because that's where the catalyst of my awakening, had to go through the breakdown, the mental breakdown, be broken, the death of the ego. And then I was like, well, and then what happened after that?
00:24:32
Suzanne Marambio
The five stages of grief, right? So I started to write that down. yeah And I started to write 18 chapters straight, free form. i was like, okay, there's a book. And I made a commitment. I said, all right, Suzanne, if you reach 40,000 words,
00:24:47
Suzanne Marambio
And you write all these chapters effortlessly. i dare you to go and put it out to publishers. Well, I reached 50 something thousand words and I wrote to a lot of publishers and it was Pegasus in the UK that wrote one month later and said, yeah, we would like to set up a contract.
00:25:05
Suzanne Marambio
So the book pretty much talks about 10 years of what I've gone through. My own spiritual journey, the courses that I've done, I've dabbled into Reiki, learning about energy healing.
00:25:17
Suzanne Marambio
I did a course in miracles. I did that three years back to back. um Conscious parenting, obviously. ive went on silent retreats. I've you know I've just done lots of different things and I think the book is just demonstrating when you set your time and and intention to work on the self to work inward to go on a self journey of self-mastery to go on this quest of being curious things happen. And it was like, that's what happened to me.
00:25:49
Suzanne Marambio
So I find topics, I'm a deep diver and I go, oh, I want to learn about Dolores Cannon, quantum healing, hypnosis technique. And I go go down that path and I do a past life regression.
00:26:00
Suzanne Marambio
Things come to me and I learn a lot about myself in that past life regression therapy. And so this book is pretty much recording everything. and even when I thought, oh, that's a little bit too much, I thought, no, I'm going to do it because we don't talk about this in mainstream. We don't talk about this every day over the table with a friend, right?
00:26:23
Suzanne Marambio
I always check in where can I go with my conversation. Well, this book is just like open field and people who know me We'll get halfway through it and go, oh, this is interesting. I did not know that about her.
00:26:39
Suzanne Marambio
I talk about light language because when you start to activate your chakras and especially your third eye, things start to open up. You open up different fields and the mind... Yeah, let's just say we only see less than 10%. So we're not even unlocking that 90% of junk DNA.
00:26:57
Suzanne Marambio
And I'm starting to do that now. And I'm only just tapping the surface. There's so much more that could be done. But this book is showing you, are you willing to go on a spiritual quest?
00:27:09
Suzanne Marambio
Because there's so much you can learn about yourself and remembering who you are. And so that's what this book is about.
00:27:14
Sharla Mandere
Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Mm-hmm.
00:27:16
Suzanne Marambio
It's an eye-opener. It's candid. It's heartfelt. Bit of tears at the start, chapter one and two. You might laugh with me. You might be like shocked.
00:27:28
Suzanne Marambio
But I think it's also a book where you might feel a bit of triggering, maybe a bit of discomfort, maybe a disbelief. Can't be true what she's saying. But I say at the start, it's you you need to practice discernment.
00:27:41
Suzanne Marambio
This is my truth. This is my experience. It's up to you. And I put QR codes in certain chapters. If you want to deep dive and choose your adventure, you can go, oh I want to learn about that topic, Abraham Hicks, or I want to learn about Dr. Shefali's podcast.
00:27:58
Suzanne Marambio
So I've actually put the QR codes. You scan your phone. You can go deep diving, watch that first video that I watched. So it's interactive, this book, very different. It's not a book where just go put down and go, oh, that was great book.
Homeschooling and Adaptability in Parenting
00:28:10
Suzanne Marambio
This is asking you take action, change your life.
00:28:16
Sharla Mandere
I love that. I love the interactive. I love the Q. I have QR codes in my upcoming book too. That like.
00:28:20
Suzanne Marambio
Yeah, it's so good. Yeah.
00:28:22
Sharla Mandere
It's the way that. Right in the book of the future. Right in the.
00:28:25
Suzanne Marambio
yeah
00:28:26
Sharla Mandere
I think, you know, it's like, I love that. I love choose your own adventure. If only we
00:28:30
Suzanne Marambio
It is. Choose your adventure. If this topic resonates with you, go down the rabbit hole. Do what I did. I'm a deep diver. I will watch videos back to back. I don't watch Netflix and TV. i actually watch a lot of webinars, podcasts.
00:28:43
Suzanne Marambio
I like to read. Yeah, a lot of Gnostics and spiritual wisdom.
00:28:49
Sharla Mandere
Yeah, if only we could choose our own adventure in motherhood, it would.
00:28:52
Suzanne Marambio
Well, I have. I have in some way. i mean, All this work that I've done, it brings me to this place. So I i think I have chosen my adventure.
00:29:03
Suzanne Marambio
Yeah, definitely. Once I started to sort of, and, you know, even to take a child out of school, that's a huge thing, especially in Australia.
00:29:04
Sharla Mandere
Yeah.
00:29:10
Suzanne Marambio
i don't know popular it's over there, but here we're like, 10% population that do it. And it's still that you feel awkward to say that, oh, yes, my son or my daughter's homeschooled because people look at you weirdly.
00:29:23
Suzanne Marambio
They think it's strange.
00:29:23
Sharla Mandere
Yeah.
00:29:24
Suzanne Marambio
But I had to get out of my head and say, it's not actually, it's actually smart because you're looking at your child and going, you don't fit the system. So I need to take you out and I'll be responsible.
00:29:36
Suzanne Marambio
I will tailor this and I'll make it the best. So you get the best quality of education.
00:29:42
Sharla Mandere
Yeah.
00:29:42
Suzanne Marambio
So there is more input to do this than to just leave her there.
00:29:46
Sharla Mandere
I think, yeah. think homeschooling here is becoming more and more, especially post-pandemic.
00:29:48
Suzanne Marambio
Yeah.
00:29:52
Sharla Mandere
Like it was never my past.
00:29:53
Suzanne Marambio
Oh, okay. No, it's still a bit taboo. It's like...
00:29:56
Sharla Mandere
it was It was never my plan, but here we are.
00:29:58
Suzanne Marambio
Yeah, no, it's not.
00:29:59
Sharla Mandere
Right.
00:29:59
Suzanne Marambio
And it wasn't my plan either. And that's what I say. It's like I've obviously done a lot of work on myself to actually agree to it.
00:30:03
Sharla Mandere
Yeah.
00:30:07
Suzanne Marambio
It's like where's my ego and didn't even talk me out of it.
00:30:08
Sharla Mandere
Yeah.
00:30:10
Suzanne Marambio
It was like, okay, do it. I was like, oh, my goodness, I'm not even like talking myself out of this. Yeah. Yeah.
00:30:17
Sharla Mandere
Yeah. I think even when I was fighting it, something in me was like, this is the right thing for her.
00:30:22
Suzanne Marambio
Yes, for her. Yeah, you do have to get out of your head. It's not about you. It's about your child and what do they need.
00:30:29
Suzanne Marambio
How can you serve them the best? Yeah.
00:30:29
Sharla Mandere
Yeah.
00:30:31
Sharla Mandere
How, how will they thrive?
00:30:34
Suzanne Marambio
Yes, exactly, because she wasn't thriving in the school system.
00:30:34
Sharla Mandere
Right. How.
00:30:37
Suzanne Marambio
And I thought, this is ridiculous. This poor child is terrified. she's got She's anxious. She's got like a rash from scratching. Her jaw is locked because she's like tense all day.
00:30:49
Suzanne Marambio
And I thought, what am I doing? I'm sending this child. It's like going to a slaughterhouse every day. It's like like ah I cannot watch this anymore. It's not fair. And now she's totally different person. It's almost 12 months she's out of the system.
00:30:49
Sharla Mandere
Mm hmm.
00:31:02
Suzanne Marambio
She's lively. She's social. She's talkative. She's travelling the world. And I'm like, you would never have had this if you told me 12 months ago. So things happen for a reason.
00:31:12
Sharla Mandere
Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. yeah
00:31:14
Suzanne Marambio
Yeah.
00:31:15
Sharla Mandere
yeah Well, this has been so awesome, Suzanne. I love, I love, and I just love, i appreciate so much talking to moms and other parts of the world. Just hearing like motherhood is kind of the same.
00:31:27
Sharla Mandere
we have same struggles, concerns.
00:31:29
Suzanne Marambio
Definitely.
00:31:30
Sharla Mandere
We have the same things going on, you know?
00:31:32
Suzanne Marambio
yeah
00:31:33
Sharla Mandere
um And so, yeah, thank you so much for sharing your story. I hope people get your book and, you know, I'll link it below. um Yeah. amazing.
00:31:44
Suzanne Marambio
Yep.
00:31:44
Sharla Mandere
it
00:31:44
Suzanne Marambio
I'll share the links with you too.
00:31:47
Sharla Mandere
Yeah, yeah. I'll put it in the show notes and, and yeah, then people can hopefully get it. And we do have Barnes and Nobles. there's one not far from me here. it'd be super fun.
00:31:54
Suzanne Marambio
Oh, perfect. Perfect.
00:31:58
Sharla Mandere
And um yeah, this was great. Thank you so much. And we will see you in the next episode.
00:32:02
Suzanne Marambio
Thank you. Thank you so much. Bye for now.
00:32:07
Sharla Mandere
Bye.