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A Magnet to … Mishaps?! Patience and Perception
561 Plays2 months ago
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HELLO! And welcome back to the Pass Around the Smile podcast. This year, I am so focused on bringing you episodes which will have you feeling relaxed, optimistic, inspired and READY to live life to your fullest potential. I’m so excited just writing that!
In this episode I share with you the ups and downs which January brought me. My new year card spread for January was so spot on. I pulled patience and perception - and boy did I need to practice patience and change my perception on certain situations, over and over!
While January was chaotic, it was full of lessons, and I’m grateful that I can now share all of this with my community. I am positive that this episode will resonate in more ways than one. Something we all struggle with from time to time is having patience, not only in regards to our dreams manifesting, but with everyday life occurrences. How we react and perceive everything that is happening around us, becomes a direct reflection of what we experience.
In this ep I chat about how our inner reality directly affects our outer reality and how you can use patience and perception to alter what you are experiencing. I also touch on confirmation bias. What it is and how the majority of the world experiences it! Are you looking for evidence to support your fears or limiting beliefs? It can be such a huge block when it comes to manifestation. If confirmation bias is taking over your subconscious mind, you aren’t allowing yourself freedom, peace, love, happiness or success.
Something I’m also passionate about, is not ‘waiting’ or ‘depending’ on something external to dictate your happiness. I hear a lot of, ‘I’ll be happy when …. I’ll feel relaxed when …’ Why not allow yourself to feel these feelings now? Because you can. They are available to you.
An exciting episode full of golden nuggets, I hope you love it! Please follow, subscribe, comment and join my community below!
View my website here! (My very own oracle cards, journals, meditations, courses + more magical stuff available!)
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The Pass Around the Smile podcast is recorded on Bundjalung Country, in South East Queensland, Australia. We acknowledge the Yugambeh people of the Bundjalung Nation, the traditional owners of this land. We pay our respects to Elders past, present and emerging.
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Transcript
Introduction to 'Pass Around the Smile'
00:00:00
Speaker
Pass Around the Smile is like your go-to friend, the one that lifts you up and backs you to the end. She's there to guide and inspire, challenge and teach, and remind you that your best self isn't out of reach. Self-development, manifestation, self-love and more, it's time to trust the process more your host, Cleo Massey, and I am so glad you're here. Let the magic begin.
00:00:30
Speaker
call Hello, my Pass Around the Smilers, and welcome back to the Pass Around the Smile podcast. It has been a minute. I had an unintentional break. You guys are so funny. I've had DMs, emails, and some voice messages being like, hey.
00:00:48
Speaker
Where are you when a new episode's coming out? And I've told you guys this before, but I'm very passionate about not forcing things when they just aren't meant to be or they just aren't feeling right. I have sat down like three times to record this episode and it just hasn't worked out for so many different reasons.
Podcast Revamp: New Space & Editor
00:01:09
Speaker
But I'm here today, no pressure attached. I need to practice what I preach. I tell you guys to be kind to yourself, too alleviate the pressure to only do things when it feels right, aligned, inspired. So I really had to take my own advice and just chill for a second. I mean, I only really missed like one fortnight or maybe two fortnight and I did pump the episodes out in December. But I do know that January is such a, it's like an enlightening time where you want to fill your soul with good advice and refreshing
00:01:43
Speaker
cleaners and tips and stories. And I'm so grateful that I am that person for a lot of you. So I'm grateful that you've missed the podcast. I am back. This year is going to be better than ever. So yes, I'm in a new space. I'm recording in my pass around the smile office, or maybe I feel like we should call it an HQ because that sounds way more official. I am recording from Pass Around the Smiles HQ right now. I've changed up my space. I bought a brand new microphone for the two years that the Pass Around the Smiles podcast has existed. I recorded from my dad's studio, which is actually in the room next to me, which that I'm recording in at the moment.
00:02:23
Speaker
But I would always have to kick Dad out. He was always happy for me to do so, but I ah felt bad. It was a really dark room. ah It sounded great, but it was a very dark studio. So now I have windows, it's open. Hopefully it still sounds great. If it doesn't, don't worry. This is kind of like a test of all my new equipment in my first episode. I will be tweaking and making everything spic and span.
00:02:48
Speaker
um But I just wanted to get into this, especially because it has been a few times I've tried to record this episode. It just wasn't working. I had to just stop, rest and reassess. I did not want to give you guys 20%. To be honest, I'm not at 100% at the moment at all, but I'm closer to 100% than 20%, that is for sure.
00:03:09
Speaker
So yeah, here I am brand new microphone. Also, I am recording it as in visually. Back before I was pregnant, I would record all my podcasts. I would post clips on social media. I was so inspired because I was feeling fresh. I then got pregnant and sick, as you guys know, and then I had a baby and I got busy and mum life took over.
00:03:30
Speaker
But now I am visually recording it, I am audio recording it, and I have hired an editor. A beautiful girl by the name of Mariah will now be editing my podcast. And you know what that means? It means I will have so much more time, energy, creative space to record more episodes for you guys. So this is so exciting. So yeah, I am feeling... in one and one part of me is feeling refreshed and excited and motivated but I've got to be honest the other part of me is struggling a little bit for many different reasons I will get into it one day right now is not the time um but I am going to tell you the ups and downs that January has bought me
00:04:17
Speaker
And my yearly card spread literally told me it was going to happen, which is just so wild. um So yeah, oh, I should say too, because I am recording this visually now, you can watch my podcast now on YouTube. So if you are more of a visual person, jump on YouTube, subscribe to my channel. I'll be uploading all of my podcasts on there.
00:04:38
Speaker
with the video as well. And there'll be a video also accompanying on Spotify, which is so great. But if you prefer to listen to me just in your ears, of course, nothing changes. And just a reminder, please follow me on Spotify, subscribe on Apple Podcasts, subscribe on YouTube whereof we're wherever it is that you listen. It really helps me keep creating content, seeing that you guys like it. You can comment on Spotify now as well. I can reply to you, which is fun. You know, reach out, let me know what topics you want to hear about as well. I sat down feeling very inspired this morning, finally, and mapped out my next four episodes. I know you guys are going to love it. So before we jump into all of the juiciness of today's episode, you may have already seen on
00:05:25
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my social media or via my email campaigns that I am running another retreat.
Upcoming Retreat Announcement
00:05:30
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My first retreat with yoga ball was just magical and amazing and inspiring and refreshing. And I cannot wait to be in this space again. I'm announcing it early because two reasons. There were so many of you who traveled interstate to come to the retreat. How cool if people traveled internationally this time to come to the retreat. You are very welcome. Although I know that that can be very expensive and a big trip.
00:05:55
Speaker
But I did want to let you guys know early in case you aren't around Queensland and you need to travel. um But the second reason being is we've done this. So there is a payment plan, a seven month payment plan. So you guys can pay little bits. And then when you get to October, you are all paid off. You're going to this retreat to treat yourself. It's a manifestation retreat. It's a wellness retreat.
00:06:17
Speaker
It's a yoga retreat. I'm so excited about all of it. One element that I think I'm most excited about is Kylie Stewart is joining us as in the Kylie Stewart, the medium, the healer, the spirit baby psychic that I've had on the podcast that I talk about all the time. She is coming along on the retreat. So not only do you get like yoga sessions, sound healing sessions,
00:06:38
Speaker
manifestation, self-development, self-reflection classes with me, ah access to all the facilities, the ice baths, the spa, the pool, you get one-on-one medium psychic healing session with Kylie. Anyway, I'm not going to go on about the retreat because you will know in your heart right now if you want to join up or not, but the link is in the show notes. If you want to grab your spot, spots are limited and yeah, we'll let the magic begin.
00:07:05
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And we'll let the magic continue right now because we are getting into the podcast. My first podcast back for 2025. Yes, it took me a while. Am I being hard on myself about that? I was a little bit. Have I learnt my lesson? Yes, I have. Again, I have a lot to fill you guys in on, but some of what I'm feeling lately, I haven't even had a minute to process it myself.
Insights from Yearly Card Spread
00:07:28
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So once I process, I will decide how to share it with you or when to share it with you, but right now I'm sharing some of it with you for sure today.
00:07:38
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um And it's starting with my yearly card spread, my pool that I know so many of you guys did. Oh my gosh. I love being tagged in your yearly card spreads. So much excitement coming for us. Pass around the smilers, isn't there? So let me start with telling you what my January, February and March cards were and how January has already shown me that the cards never lie. So for January, I pulled the cards. Patience.
00:08:08
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and perception. So two separate cards I felt like I needed to pull two for January. They flew out so they were my two January cards patience and perception. As you will have seen from the title patience and perception are going to play a huge part in this podcast episode and please keep listening because I really feel like these lessons are the ones where you go, oh, I needed to hear that, or oh, I do that, or oh, that makes so much sense now. This is what I really love about self-development is you can take these topics that seem quite like big and generic and like, oh yeah, I hear the word perception and patience a lot. Yeah, patience is just like being patient, wait for your dreams, but there is so much more to it.
00:08:52
Speaker
And when we uncover these little secrets within these self-development topics, that is when life gets really exciting because that is when you have the switches, the shifts that you've been waiting for or the aha moments that you're like, oh my gosh, I did not realize I do that. I did not realize I think like that because what we do, what we think, what we say, how we react can become so ingrained in us because It's all implanted in our subconscious mind. And as you guys know, from what I've told you before, is that 95% of our habitual behavior is run by what our subconscious mind is doing, saying, like passing on to us. So everything we do, we say, we react. It's being dictated by what our subconscious mind is doing. And our subconscious mind is like a playback machine. It just goes over and over and over again until we create changes within the paradigm. that sits within our subconscious mind. I find it so exciting because so much science backs this woo woo stuff that I love talking about.
00:09:57
Speaker
It's so exciting. Okay. So let's go to my February card. So my February card was the rising card. So I should actually, I will tell you what each card says first. So let's go back to January. The patient's card says something like, I'm probably going to get this a little bit wrong, but it's like my dreams are materializing. Okay, hang on. I do have them written down. I'll just read them.
00:10:19
Speaker
Okay, so patience card says, my dreams are manifesting behind the scenes. I have patience and trust that something good is on its way. The perception card, which I got in January says, is this situation worth dwelling on any further? Changing your perception has the power to change your experiences.
00:10:40
Speaker
Then my February card, I got the rising card, which says you have come so far and are continuing to rise. Don't quit right before the miracle occurs. March, my March card was miracles, which I don't need to read what that card says because it's, it's pretty obvious. The miracles card means that there is miracles coming. And the fact that my February card at the end of the rising card said, don't quit right before the miracle occurs. And then March was miracles. I'm like so excited to see what the universe has in store for me. And what I love so much about these cards and the new year card spreads is it helps us deal with everyday things that come up
00:11:22
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accordingly like not accordingly is probably not the right word it helps us deal with what life is throwing at us knowing that we are supported knowing what is coming and knowing in my case in January if I just show patience and if I change my perception in February I am going to rise and in March I'm going to experience a miracle This is I just
January's Challenges and Lessons
00:11:50
Speaker
I just love it. I love the guidance that it all brings. So let's go to January because that's where we are now. We have pretty much finished January. I'm not sure when this podcast episode is going to come out, but today it's like the 28th or 29th of January. So we're at the end of January. I have well and truly
00:12:09
Speaker
experienced it all in January. And these cards gave me insight into what was coming. Now, I'm not going to lie. When I pulled these cards for January, I was a little bit like, oh, what's coming? All of my decks of cards are positive. I don't have any negative cards in my decks of cards. They're not tarot cards.
00:12:30
Speaker
However, there are cards that are more positive than others. For example, in January, I didn't pull the success card or the love card or the career card or the you know new beginnings card. I pulled patience and perception. So I knew that there were going to be some things coming up where I would need to change my perception and show some patience.
00:12:49
Speaker
Now I don't want this to kind of scare you off your readings because for example I'm sure my mum won't won't mind me saying this but mum did her yearly card spread and she was kind of like oh it wasn't the most positive like it's made me not really look forward to like what's coming up in the year.
00:13:07
Speaker
In 2021 when we got married I remember doing my New Year card spread and being like oh I didn't get any of those like really exciting uplifting cards and I kind of got cards that made me think oh gosh is something like negative gonna happen?
00:13:22
Speaker
2021 other than the birth year of indigo now was the best year of my life it was the year we got married i had my hands we loved where we lived we were partying pass around a smile rose like it was one of the best years of my life however looking back at my yearly card spread all the cards told the truth all the cards happened like you know came up in those months but they were in ways that i didn't expect like i remember little things may come up and then i was able to look at june for example and say it was the misaligned card and be like actually spiritually i'm a little bit misaligned at the moment because when i meditate i'm not reaching that like high meditative state that i know i can and that was it so that's just a little i've kind of gone off topic there but
00:14:10
Speaker
Just a little reminder with your yearly card spreads and your card spreads that you do all year. They do not lie. They will tell you the truth. They always tell you what you need to know and guide you because they are magical, these cards. However, you kind of get to pave your own path, if that makes sense.
00:14:27
Speaker
Okay, so and then use the cards as you pave that path to help guide you through that path Anyway, okay. I'm moving on I'm moving on I get too excited that you guys know this and then I go off on tangents But I have my bullet points here. I've printed out bullet points. So I try and stay focused Focus, Cleo. Okay, so let's talk about the little challenges that came to me in January, uh, where I needed to show patients and where there were sometimes I definitely didn't. So yeah,
00:15:00
Speaker
January has been really chaotic, but full of lessons. So it started off with our laundry sink overflowing, going under our floorboards, kind of popping them up and discoloring the floorboards. Mold was growing.
00:15:15
Speaker
We had to get insurance in to like blow the mold out. We had these huge machines in our house that were so loud. There was like air hot air blowing everywhere. Our floorboards looked awful, indigos crawling around. And on one Friday at five, no 4pm, they literally called us and was like, you need to move out of your house like today.
00:15:35
Speaker
um and we freaked out we were like uh we have a baby we have a dog like you know yes my parents live around the corner but they actually don't have a spare room because i take it up with my office so we'd have to get like temporary accommodation um that was full-on and i must say in that moment did i show pace patience did i change my perception no i didn't i freaked out i catastrophized but we are going to get into that a bit later because i have been learning some things about confirmation bias and we are going to go into what confirmation bias is but I do it and I'm working on it and my cards helped me understand that I needed to work on it. Again these cards guide us in ways that we wouldn't expect which is why I just love the depth of these readings and what they can bring to us.
00:16:28
Speaker
So we didn't end up having to move out because they did not cut a hole in the wall to like let the mold out. But over the weekend where we did think they said, okay, just we won't cut the holes in the wall. So over the weekend, we did think that we were then going to have to move out on the Monday.
00:16:45
Speaker
Once I calmed down, I remembered my cards and I said, Luke, we really need to change our perception on this. And to be honest, Luke was amazing. He didn't need to change his perception. I needed to change my perception. I was looking at it as this big scary thing. It's going to absolutely wreck Indigo's sleep. Cause you know, she's getting better at sleeping and bottles and boob and all of that. And it's going to wreck all of this that we've worked so hard. She'll get out of routine. We're going to end up in like a shit box.
00:17:14
Speaker
because it was January, it was school holidays, I was thinking of every single thing that could go wrong. My chest was tight, I was getting anxious, I was absolutely catastrophizing and thinking of the worst case scenario right in the moment.
00:17:28
Speaker
Uh, and then over the weekend, once I calmed down, I thought, A, this might take a while because I kept thinking like, I'll just be happy and calm when all of this is sorted. I wish I could just, you know, email the broker and call the insurance company and get them to come on Monday and do it all on Monday and work it all out. What I thought is it's actually not going to be that quick and I cannot Allow my happiness to depend on the result of our floorboards being fixed because this might take months. So I must show patience and I must allow myself to be all the things that I want to be calm, happy, content, in the meantime, where our house is a little bit of a mess. Who cares? At the end of the day, this was a tiny thing, but in the moment I made it such a big thing. Anyway, in the moment when I was making it such a big thing, my negative energy was spiraling. What did I do? I dropped the vacuum and the vacuum smashed our oven. Completely smashed the oven, the whole door fell off. What? Like how does that even happen?
00:18:36
Speaker
How does that even happen? So guys, don't drop your Dyson on your oven because it can take the whole door off and completely smash it. Again, in actually, you know what? In that moment, I had kind of learned my lesson already and I almost like laughed it off and was just like, oh my God, this is so funny. I know that.
00:18:55
Speaker
I created this. And I'm not saying this to be like toxic, like blaming myself, but my energy was so low and I was being really quite ungrateful and negative. It's no wonder something else negative happened. So I was actually OK when this happened.
Energy and Positivity
00:19:10
Speaker
I was just laughing and it kind of showed me. I feel like the universe was like Cleo snap out of it, like snap out of it. um And I was able to change my perception right in that moment.
00:19:20
Speaker
Indigo was right near the oven when it smashed. She did not get hurt at all. Yes, she got the fright of her life. So did I, but she was safe. What else matters? Literally nothing in the world. So I was able to kind of get over that and move on. So I really started reflecting. And what I realized I was doing is I had become a magnet. not to miracles, I had become a magnet to the opposite. We all know how the law of attraction works. It never stops working. It's just energy attracting energy. So yes, we can use the law of attraction to our advantage and attract all of the beautiful people, the beautiful experiences and opportunities that we desire if we are vibrating at a high frequency, but the same can happen if you are vibrating at a low frequency. And I don't want to say this to scare you. It's not like
00:20:06
Speaker
you know, you're going to have one negative thought because we all have intrusive thoughts. They are normal and natural. You are not, so you're not a super negative person. You're not super weird or strange or, you know, anything like that. When you have intrusive thoughts or negative thoughts, we have 50 to 60,000 thoughts a day. Actually, apparently there's some argument on that now about how many thousands of thoughts we have a day, but we have thousands of thoughts a day. Not all of them can be positive. And just because you have a negative thought doesn't mean you're all of a sudden going to manifest this awful negative occurrence in your life. Absolutely not. A positive thought is three times more powerful than a negative thought, which is great to know. But also, I'm talking the whole span of January at the moment. I definitely had ebbs and flows where I was OK and then I was not OK, where I was positive and then where I was really negative. It was a month of it really tested me January. Again, I'm not going to go right into it in this episode. You can probably read between the lines. I think, you know, hormones, I'm still
00:21:05
Speaker
You know coming out of my postpartum like first year. There's a lot going on in my mind. I'm feeling quite foggy ah quite not myself still and I'm trying to navigate all of that with floorboards broken ovens and then What happened next? They say things come in three and that in itself is a limiting belief. Do you know what I was thinking? Things come in three and then did the third third thing come? Yes, it did. But that again, like I'm not placing negativity on myself being like, I created this, but I do know that my energy was so off in January.
00:21:41
Speaker
I was allowing negative things to continue spiraling. Why? One, because I was actually being lazy. Two, because I was getting comfortable in negativity. It can be comfortable just to stay there, to feel a bit sorry for yourself. Oh, well I've eaten something bad already today so I may as well ruin the whole day. Or, you know, I didn't meditate last night and I said I'd do it every night this week. It's already Tuesday. I'll just start again next week. I was indulging in my holiday habits Too much into January and the result that it was having on my overall energy was absolutely attracting Not very good things into my life so I just wanted to let you guys know that of like the magnitude and the Length of what I'm talking about like this was weeks after weeks So there were bigger negative things happening and then there were smaller negative things happening.
Understanding Confirmation Bias
00:22:32
Speaker
So one of the kind of, I guess this is big-ish, in my mind it's bigger. Again, perception is everything. Your perception of something will be completely different to my perception of something and that's completely okay. But basically we got a few really annoying hard-hitting calls from like the insurance company and the broker basically
00:22:50
Speaker
Everything was a real mess. It was so overwhelming. I was feeling completely anxious and my efforts to kind of Let everything go and trust the process and be grateful quickly kind of diminished When the anxiety came back and it's hard when anxiety comes up because we can't just we can't see through clarity when we're anxious We can't just you know meditate it out. Well meditation absolutely does help but when you are in the pits of like almost a panic attack Sometimes those things aren't achievable and that's okay You do need to take efforts to get karma, of course, because you don't want to allow yourself to spiral, which I ended up doing. But basically in the moment, again, I reacted, I catastrophized. I was like, we're not going to get anything covered. We are going to be in so much debt with this. We're going to have to pay thousands of dollars, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah. And I was like kind of angry a bit with the universe because I'd made such an effort to turn things around.
00:23:45
Speaker
to be a bit more positive, to be grateful, to laugh about the oven. And I was like, oh, so, you know, is this what I get? Like this is also hard and whatever. Anyway, I was in a mood that day and I remember and now I'm moving on to like the little funny things that can happen when you are out of alignment and when the law of attraction is working against you. So it is working with you.
00:24:08
Speaker
It's still working with you because you're the one who is putting out the negative vibes, who is focusing on what isn't working rather than what is working, and I was. I could have sat in that moment, breathed it out, acknowledged my feelings and looked at all of the beautiful things in my life, the fact that we had insurance people to talk to, but no, I was looking at everything we didn't have and everything that could go wrong.
00:24:29
Speaker
which I believe then resulted in these next funny little things happening, which were just reminders to like snap out of it. So I was doing Indigo's onesie up and I remember thinking like, okay, at least I'm on the floor now on our comfy mat. I'm doing Indigo's onesie up. Like nothing crap can happen to me in this moment because I'm literally just doing Indigo's nappy up.
00:24:50
Speaker
um because I got to the point where I felt like everything I touched was wrecked. Everything that I did was bad. I was constantly making mistakes. I was constantly screwing up. I was being so hard on myself and so mean to myself, which I've actually decided episode three of 2025 is gonna be about self-love and self-compassion in that way. But I was like, at least like nothing can go wrong in this next few seconds. But I was almost like,
00:25:16
Speaker
go on universe, try make something go wrong because ah you know when you're just in that destructive mood and you're just like ugh. Anyway so I'm doing her onesie up and what happens? I bend my nail back so hard it hurts so much and I have like um proper you know biab whatever it's called gel nails on at the moment they are hard as rock it is hard to like bend them back And I was just doing up her little flimsy onesie. But it's like the universe is like, Cleo, you are literally asking for something in this moment to go wrong because you are feeling like such a failure, such a destructive human right now. We are going to show you that if you are, if that's what you think you are, then you are. And in that moment, I actually had to laugh. I had to be like, how did this happen? Because the thought was there that nothing can go wrong. I'm just doing up her onesie, like just take a minute to breathe. And then it did.
00:26:11
Speaker
Anyway, I was also wearing my favorite pasta shirt this day and this shirt, right? My mum got it for me for my birthday. I absolutely love it. It says like pasta is consumed daily, which is quite the truth for me. And I love it. And it's this light yellow and I feel so good in it.
00:26:28
Speaker
I, every time I wear it, I stain it. Do you know how many stains are on this t-shirt? And do you know why? Because I say every time I wear it, I stain it. And the weirdest things can happen. Like literally food or matter will jump out at me and stain this shirt.
00:26:48
Speaker
every single time I wear it. We that weekend we were at coffee with our friends who are visiting from America and my friend Jess she was telling us how she got engaged and she accidentally knocked the waitress and the waitress spilt my hot chocolate from over the table and it went all up the side of the shirt.
00:27:08
Speaker
What happened then, like a couple of days later, I washed it. I kind of got out the stains, but not really. um It just appeared with these blue dyed dots on the shoulder. Did I put it in the washing with blue things? and No, I didn't. How did it happen? I don't know. The universe put it there. And then since then, honestly.
00:27:27
Speaker
You should see this shirt stained on every like vegemite spit vomit. Yes, I'm a mom and this is normal. But the other things like hot chocolate, I then caught it. I caught it in the bottom of our wardrobe and the wardrobe ran over the bottom of the shirt and ran black like wheel lines on it. Like it's just getting funny at this stage. But I know that what this was doing was just teaching me a lesson.
00:27:54
Speaker
was to snap out of it, you are creating this. Anyway, so I was in a mood. As you can tell, these little things were happening, these big things were happening. I would make an effort to get positive and then I would get frustrated when the efforts that I made to get positive weren't rewarded straight away from the universe. But of course, if I just looked at what January had told me, it was to show patience.
00:28:19
Speaker
I tried to do that sometimes and then sometimes I wasn't. Anyway, then we get a call. So we own another unit and my brother and his girlfriend rent it off us. And we get a call from the manager of the complex saying, Hey, Cleo, you're... Oh, actually it was an email because I cried.
00:28:40
Speaker
your um Your unit is leaking and something is happening in your bathroom and it is going like leaking into the unit below and like the ladies bathroom is like flooded under you.
00:28:56
Speaker
oh my god guys guys I was so upset confused angry all of the things and I was like see this is what I thought things happen in three like whoa is me I'm the unluckiest person in the world How are we gonna fix this we are gonna have to tear up because we've renovated that bathroom as well I thought we're gonna have to tear up all the tiles redo the whole bathroom like oh my god. Oh my gosh. Oh my gosh Enough was enough at this point. I kind of thought in that moment I think the universe may be testing me the universe is like Cleo you asked for guidance and help and reassurance
00:29:37
Speaker
when you did your new year card spread, because I have just been feeling a little bit lost lately, we gave it to you and you are continuously not listening to what we have told you, which is show patience and change your perception.
00:29:53
Speaker
So in that moment, I was able to quickly kind of snap out of it. Again, I love how these cards can not only guide you, but help change you into literally a better person, a calmer person, a more optimistic person and really highlight areas of yourself that need work. So I was able to kind of like just breathe and what happened when I did just breathe and perceive this as what it was. A little leak that plumbers can fix. We will not have to rip up our whole bathroom. The universe has got my back. I am guided.
00:30:30
Speaker
It was crazy what happened. Just the the phone calls that were answered straight away, the you know the help we got from family, the good news that came so quickly. It was all fixed up so easily and so quickly. And I feel like that then was the universe being like, see?
00:30:49
Speaker
Like we are almost rewarding you. So what January has taught me is just to kind of count on your cards, look at what your cards are telling you and really like listen. And I guess just like be brave in your weaknesses and like acknowledging the parts of you that are not so strong in the moment you know like i know i didn't say that in the best way but i think you get me it's like i
00:31:24
Speaker
All these parts of me, of my personality that make up me, the parts that make up you, we can think that they are small and that they don't have much effect on our everyday life occurrences, all the things that we are bringing in. But really, they do. All the little things add up to big nasty reactions that you may have, a panic attack that may come on, the perception of yourself after social occasions where you're hard on yourself, where you're at work and you are not feeling clear. It's these little things that add up that may need tweaking that allow you to move forward positively and create actual change. So January for me, as I said, very chaotic, but so many lessons.
00:32:11
Speaker
So many things happened that could be perceived as big, as annoying, as expensive. We still haven't got our floors fixed. our We still have no oven. Lucky we've got an air fryer. But I can also perceive them as like, oh my God, as I said, thank God the oven didn't hurt indigo. ah We are gonna get some nice new floorboards in the end. Like, you know, it's been funny. I've learned so many lessons. I've grown as a person. I've come up with a great podcast because of it.
00:32:41
Speaker
We need to change the way we look at things. When we change the way we look at things, the things we look at change. So I did a bit of a deep dive into patience because this was my theme of the month. And we can look at patience as something, you know, really broad and obvious. Patience, yeah, have patience, wait for your dreams, wait till you find the love of your life, they're gonna come into the your life when it's the right time, have patience while you're on your fitness journey, you'll get to your goal, wait. We know that, but what about the intricacies? The little...
00:33:10
Speaker
things that we don't really think of that aren't so obvious when it comes to these self development topics, whether it's patience or judgment or, um, self criticism, whatever it is. So I asked myself this question, I wrote it down in my journal. It said, how would I feel and what would I do differently if I knew that everything had a solution and Peace, a clear mind, and everything that I desire is on its way at the perfect time. Like if solutions and my desires and everything that I wanted was guaranteed, what would I do differently in this moment and how would I feel? The floodgates were open. I journaled for so long. And I want you to ask yourself this. If everything that you want is guaranteed,
00:34:00
Speaker
Peace, a clear mind, solutions to all of your problems. It is guaranteed. What would you be doing differently now? Would you be feeling more relaxed? Would you go and catch up with that friend for coffee because you know that your, I don't know, cleaning can wait or whatever it is. What would you be doing differently? How would you be living your life differently? Because every single thing that you want in this life is guaranteed if you believe it to be so. We know that like attracts like, positivity attracts positivity.
00:34:30
Speaker
the law of attraction working in simple form in that way, whether you think you can or think you can't, you are right. So this really taught me that I wasn't having patience with the journey. I was just focusing on the outcome. I will be happy when, I will be calm when, and we can do this. Like I will be confident when I am my goal weight. I will be happy when I have my dream house. I will feel, uh,
00:34:58
Speaker
content when I have this much in my savings account. But then you were going to get that amount one day. You were going to get the house one day. You were going to get to the goal weight one day because we can have whatever we want with our powerful, powerful mind. And then you were going to create another goal. And then the cycle happens again. And we get stuck in this rat race of wanting, of needing. We get stuck in that energy of It's far away. I have to attain it. I don't have it yet. You're constantly climbing. You're constantly wanting more. That's not the energy that I think any of us want to attract, right? So what I realized was I was placing far too much value on the outcome, which is easy for us to do because we all want the outcome, right? We want the desire. We want to be at the finish line.
00:35:43
Speaker
But what about what happens in between? I love that quote. And it's in between goals is this thing called life, which has to be lived and enjoyed. It's such a great reminder. So often I'll hear hear people say things like, you know, oh I'm cramming all of my subjects in.
00:36:00
Speaker
ah so I can just get to the finish line, so I can just graduate. you know I just wanna be out in the workforce. And it's like, I get that, that's all well and good, but one day you are going to look back and you are going to miss so many elements of your uni life. So why not enjoy the process now?
00:36:16
Speaker
or you hear people say like oh I'm just saying no to so many things so I can save the amount of money I need to go on my Europe trip. I'm all for saving and I'm all for doing great things like you know going to Europe and traveling and spending your well-earned save money but are you pushing really really important things aside just so you can get to this goal because I think that is placing far too much pressure on that goal and you think that that goal will Make you the person that you want to be the happy person, the calm person, the wealthy person. But if you are placing your happiness on hold for something else, that something else is not going to bring you the happiness you desire. You have to find that within yourself now internally.
00:37:02
Speaker
And remember that your internal, everything that's happening internally is affecting your outer reality. Your inner reality affects your outer reality. It's just energy attracting energy. So I want you to think now, are you focusing too much on the outcome and not so much of the journey? Like, I know that's a bit of a cliche. We've all heard the quote, like, you know, focus on the journey, not the destination, but more so like really being present and enjoying where you are now.
00:37:31
Speaker
knowing that you actually can be happy now. You can be calm now. You can be the person that you want to be now. You do not have to wait for this thing to make you that person. And if you are waiting for that thing to make you that person, it is not going to make you that person. It's not going to fulfill you how you are dreaming it to. So as I've mentioned, I've been learning about confirmation bias and this is coming from my need to catastrophize everything and kind of jump into the worst case scenario and this all kind of came under this card of perception you know is this situation worth dwelling on any further that's what the card says changing your perception has the power to change your experiences
00:38:13
Speaker
And I was experiencing this firsthand. So this confirmation bias, so what is it? I'm going to read you kind of like what it is. So it's a psychological tendency where we unconsciously seek out, interpret, and remember information that supports our existing beliefs. So for example,
00:38:36
Speaker
I catastrophise very quickly in January's scenario, I did. And my first instinct was to assume the worst. And then what my mind does is it shows me all of the evidence that I have to support why I should fear the worst and why all these bad things are going to happen. And my mind is kind of blocked to all the things that could go right because I'm not allowing that to even come into my conscious mind. So for example, you might judge situations too quickly yourself.
00:39:09
Speaker
labeling them as bad in your mind. Like this is bad, this is unsafe, this is not going to go well before seeing how it actually could play out. So what you wanna look at is when something happens to you, are you looking for evidence that supports your fears or your limiting beliefs? Or are you looking for evidence that supports the unlimited possibilities that await you or that await this situation?
00:39:36
Speaker
What happens when people, conversations, situations come up that kind of trigger us is we grab straight away to that fear because the fear we think is going to protect us from the things that we don't want, the judgment, the failure, the disappointment, the conflict. And what we do in a confirmation bias sense is we ignore or we dismiss evidence that contradicts those beliefs.
00:40:05
Speaker
So let's say you are dating you're looking for someone to spend your life with and they don't reply to you for let's say like half an hour and because of your past experiences your mind goes straight to the fact that you believe is the fact that they are ghosting you that this is over that they are seeing someone else Your mind is not alert to the fact that they could just be spending time with their family, their battery may have died, they may have been in an accident, that's a bit grim, but there are so many other options. But in those moments where we're triggered or where we're feeling negative, we're vibrating low, we aren't alert or we dismiss.
00:40:48
Speaker
any evidence that could be positive and we just grab to all of the evidence that fully supports, well this is bad and this is not going to work. Exactly what I did when our floorboards happened, I kind of didn't do it with the oven because I was trying to teach myself a lesson but then I came back down again and I did it with the apartment leak and what happened as a result of grabbing on to these ideas and beliefs that everything was doomed was it created so much more negativity for me and it created a spiral, like a downward spiral. The power of awareness. Once we recognize these patterns, we can shift them. So two more examples before we finish up the episode. Let's go with self-worth. So if you don't feel like you're good enough,
00:41:34
Speaker
you will downplay your achievements and you'll focus on past mistakes. Or let's say you fear failure. You will also focus on your past mistakes and you will completely ignore your successes. Like in your mind, you will have had no successes when of course you have.
00:41:50
Speaker
So I really hope this episode has made you think. I am back. Please comment, follow, subscribe, do all the things, get in touch. The link to my Facebook community is in the show notes. It's such a supportive place to be. I love reading all of your messages. For those of you who are already booked into the retreat, I'm so excited to spend a magical four days with you. Thank you all for being the best community ever. I am going to sign off and I will be back. This year is going to be huge.
00:42:18
Speaker
and i just i hope to continue to
00:42:32
Speaker
oh