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Episode 65 - Disassociation in ADHD: Survival tool or Daily Struggle?
41 Plays3 months ago
Paul and Martin (co-mayors of ADHDville) get into an aspect of ADHD, disassociation. It's that mental state where you feel disconnected from your thoughts, emotions, surroundings, or sense of self. often as a response to stress, overwhelm or boredom.
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Put quill to paper and send us an email at: ADHDville@gmail.com
ADHD/Focus music from Martin (AKA Thinking Fish)
Theme music was written by Freddie Philips and played by Martin West. All other music by Martin West.
Please remember: This is an entertainment podcast about ADHD and does not substitute for individualized advice from qualified health professionals.
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Transcript
Podcast Introduction and Humorous Mishaps
00:00:00
Speaker
Perhaps back in the room. Wait, what back in the room? Well, yes. I was I was caught out. I was caught out. Yeah, I was caught out. You caught napping. I was. I was behind the shed. And you know, it's just yeah, there was like a technical thing. I didn't think when I was hitting the record button, I didn't think it was actually going to record. I know that seems ridiculous.
00:00:28
Speaker
Anywho. And yet here we are. Here we are Martin. Yet here we are. so um yeah So this podcast is for anyone in the ADHD community who sometimes feels an instinctive need to close up shut up shops.
00:00:44
Speaker
batten down the hatches, go into your shell, draw the curtains and disassociate from everyone and everything. Right! Absolutely. yeah that's So let's go to a place where the distractions are landmarks and the detours are our main roads. Welcome yes to ADH Dville.
00:01:11
Speaker
This disassociations Go there, associate.
Friendship and ADHD: Paul and Martin's Journey
00:01:18
Speaker
Go there quite often.
00:01:22
Speaker
Eat a biscuit. Drink a cup of tea. A cup of tea. Lovely cup of tea. Lovely cup of tea. A cup of tea. I haven't had a cup of tea for a long time.
00:01:34
Speaker
oh I only have a cup of tea when I go back to the UK. We've talked about this day in the past. Have we? That's crazy. I'm just about to read the outro. That would be silly, wouldn't it? I'm scrolling up. OK, go for it. um ah So, hello, I'm Paul Thompson. I was diagnosed with the combined ADHD oodles of schmoodles ago.
00:01:58
Speaker
And I'm Martin West and I was diagnosed with combined ADHD poo poo platter in 2013. Can you believe it? So we're just two mates. Hello. Hi. By coincidence or not, after 39 years of friendship discovered with co-ADHDers, hoorah!
00:02:15
Speaker
Now it's really really shocked, shocked. Now it's really important to say this is an entertainment podcast, Martin, about a adult ADHD and does not substitute for individualized advice for qualified health professionals. So don't take any advice from us, especially me. We're just here as a kind of all-inclusive ADHD park bench with room for everyone, including your doppelschmangers and gangers, your auto schmigos, your double shtubbles, body doubles, your chaperones and your best buddles. Okay. Still here. Congratulations. You've already owed yourself a badge for loyalty. Grab your trip packs, your pedalos, your space hoppers, space hoppers. Already are the transportation methods that are difficult to pronounce.
00:03:04
Speaker
And let us take you to ADHDville, an imaginary town that we've created in our minds. We would like to explore different parts of the A, the D, the H and the D. and And we start off, as always, at the town hall in the mayor's office where we, the joint, yeah, the joint mayors of ADHDville take care of business. I'm looking at my notes. We have ah two items on the agenda.
Birthday Celebrations and Humorous Anecdotes
00:03:33
Speaker
We've got ADHD and disassociation. And we've got a Martin's birthday quiz. I see. Yes. and yes We love a good quiz. It's your birthday, Martin. Or it was recently. It was my birthday. Where are we now? It was ah two days ago. Yeah. Exactly. Fresh. All right. Fresh. So let us jump in the mayor's car.
00:03:58
Speaker
And we're just going to go. Let's have a look here. Just remember to take the handbrake off, Martin, this time last time. You know what? Yeah. budgets forty tight It reminds me, you know, we used to work for for a, in the marketing department of a, of a construction company. Yeah. Called, called, ah called the Redlands. Um, and our, and, uh, I borrowed our,
00:04:26
Speaker
boss's car once for some reason. He really, he, he allowed me, our boss, Anthony, he allowed me to take the car out, right? His car, he is calm.
00:04:39
Speaker
the bowl voices ah Yes. Or was it, he had a Volvo estate, but before that he had a Rover, a big one. It was the Rover.
00:04:51
Speaker
It was a big posh car. That's all I remember. I think it i think it was the Volvo. Anyway, I can't remember why, but anyway, I'm driving down the road and like I look in the rearview mirror and there's loads of black smoke coming out the back. Oh my God. What the fuck is that? And then I looked down and I realised that I'd had the handbrake on the whole time.
00:05:18
Speaker
No way. i been I've been driving 15 minutes down the road on my boss's car and I've burnt out his handbrake. I just returned the car and didn't say anything.
00:05:31
Speaker
I bet the skid box is still on the road now after 25 years ago. It was like yikes. Oh my God. Do you know, I don't think I ever told you this. I had a bit of a scam going on with the company cars. They had a car pool. I used to go there and make up ah an excuse that I needed a car to borrow a car for a job. but And I used to just like hang onto it.
00:05:58
Speaker
Oh, nice. Like for weeks. For weeks. I didn't know that Toyota Camry for about three weeks and I only need it for like an hour.
00:06:12
Speaker
Oh, I like that. I like that. So I was just like, take my key in. ah Oh no, she she would, the lady that looked after the carpool, she would just like, call me one day. Paul, if you still got that Toyota Camry,
00:06:28
Speaker
open yeah no what dao to camera Oh, boy. Anyway, well, let's jump jump into into our mayor's car, which is not a Toyota Camry and a break is off. And I will take the handbrake off and let's just do hit up the the ah the coffee place. I think. Oh, that's funny, though.
00:07:14
Speaker
ah What do you want to drink, miss Mr. T? I will tell you, um someone, um ah Shelley, um our friend on TikTok um said that that green tea with roasted rice was really good so um so so that sounds right yes i'm gonna have one of one of those please thank you okay i'm gonna have a little cheeky glass of red wine so
00:07:45
Speaker
seasonal seasonal seasonal seasonal you are here like um yeah yeah i love ah ah a a nice fruity red me but boy do i get the headaches do you the e anyway get on subject So
Understanding Disassociation in ADHD
00:08:10
Speaker
disassociation. So this is the thing that if you've ever felt like you've been floating through the day or disconnected from reality, you are not alone. No. and Exactly. So um we are here to ah break it down. Why it happens with ADHD and most importantly, but what you can do about it, but yeah.
00:08:34
Speaker
Let's start with you, Mr. T. Or shall I actually start with what is what is this disassociated? So it is when feel ah um when you feel disconnected from yourself, from your thoughts or the world around you, it can feel like you're zoning out, going on autopilot or even watching your life like a of a, a, a, a film. It is like you kind of going inwards and the kind of outwards world is kind of like, is some sort of weird abstract.
00:09:10
Speaker
Yeah, a reality. Yeah. And it hangs a lot with us, with us, ADHD. Hell of a lot. The more I looked into this subject ah prepping for this podcast episode, the more I looked into it, the more I realized, actually, I do this a lot. Oh, blimey. A lot. Well, you don't.
00:09:34
Speaker
No, no, no, I do. I do. But but but this is the this is why i like I like this particular podcast. This podcast is because I've had it for quite a while. But but but ADHD is you're a year in. So yeah it's it's it's I like it. but but well I like it when you're like, oh, hang on a second. This is this is me.
00:10:00
Speaker
It's fresh and it's fresh for you. But I viewed this, I was aware of disassociation before I was diagnosed a year ago. I was aware that I disassociated with it, with the, sorry, with it, with the world.
00:10:16
Speaker
context. i' aware that Especially if I'm going through a difficult period, or if I'm on the if i'm like at the the beginning of the end of a relationship with someone, im I became in later years, latter years, whatever you say, latter, later,
00:10:35
Speaker
I became aware that I went into kind of a disassociation, disassociation kind of phase. um where And I like feeling really guilty that I've just, it felt like it was a shame. I felt like I was not only going into my shell zoning out, but also it's like dehumanizing the person in that relationship and, that you know, end, you know, beginning of the end kind of a thing. Does that make sense?
00:11:05
Speaker
Yeah, yeah, like only to like a shell and like my own like reality right because you know like because ah we could we go into disassociation when Um, you know, we're feeling overwhelmed or stressed, you know, it's a, it's a, it's a weight, right. It's a weight that our brain protects itself. Yeah. Um, and my biggest friend often in the past, how big? Six foot five. What? I think a couple of meters.
00:11:41
Speaker
Oh, right. All right. Yeah. Because I'm in Italy, I work in meters, meters. Of course, I have to work in feet. ah Yeah. more this less Less of a height, more of as of a like a square meter ridge of like a zone space. Like there's an aura around me, you know, it's like unbreakable aura, invisible.
00:12:04
Speaker
right do you know me and it's like a friend don me in my shadow like for me it's me in my like kind of zone
00:12:14
Speaker
um It's right. It's it's it isn't only in like space, but it's still sort also I find it's like I find it most apparently in time. So it's that thing of like of like yeah you you you drive somewhere and then someone says, oh, how was the drive? And you go, right. I can't remember. remember. All I remember is getting in my car and then and then I'm here.
00:12:44
Speaker
And somehow that, yeah, or, or, or I'll, or I'll kind of, to kind of, um, if I'm feeling stressed or anxious, I'll kind of go on TikTok or something. And then, you know, back an hour will, will pass just like, just like that. But it it isn't, it isn't like, ah um, you know, um,
00:13:07
Speaker
It's what came to mind is, you know you know, on the Metro in London and it's like heaving. This is where, you know, that zoning out becomes your friend. You can disassociate and you almost feel like you're in a bubble. And I could do that quite, quite skillfully because you go out of your mind. It's a coping mechanism. It's like, Oh man, right. It's got your nose under someone's armpit.
00:13:32
Speaker
Right. Yeah. No. So there's like helpful, there's helpful disassociation. God, I hate saying that word. And then there's the kind of unhelpful kind, which is like when you're You know, when you're kind of like, you get so distressed and overwhelmed that you must like shut, shut down completely. And you can't, and then you stop functioning as a human being. And becomes a very selfish state of being.
00:14:11
Speaker
Yeah, well, yes, I survival, isn't it? You're like, yes, with survival really comes to, you know, push comes to shove. You're looking after yourself and it's, and it's the danger is if it's if you're zoning out and you're you maybe could be upsetting people that you don't want to upset, you know, you might be zoning out because you can't not handling work very well or other pressures.
00:14:34
Speaker
But you're leaving your, your loved ones are out or your partner out of your side of your bubble. And then like, Oh, where did Paul go? What happened? Yeah, I know. You know, and that can actually kind of go, the the the weird thing is, is that it can be for like, you know,
00:14:55
Speaker
minutes, hours, but it can also be at days and weeks, weeks yeah right months even. like yeah you know you You can just like just unplug from, you know like I think that was Now that I'm kind of getting my taxes, ah I've almost got that all all done. I think that I have the taxes done and then I don't. But anyway, I used to disassociate around that whole thing yeah about doing taxes. It just didn't exist.
00:15:33
Speaker
ah now What I found is is that now I've almost dug myself out. I've freed up so much more of my. Of my brain, that I've got space to do other things, yeah so like light like like the the less time I am disassociating about those things, the more space I've got to do the music and and creative stuff is is quite nice. I like it.
00:16:01
Speaker
I'm thinking, hang on a second, I quite like this. Yeah, but then the but and that' the logic, when you apply logic to these things, it's like for me, if I know, I know instinctively that my paperwork is of is a mess.
00:16:19
Speaker
ah I know it is. And if I, yeah I know that if I need to look for a certain specific document, right, I know it's going to cause me trauma because I'll, and then and shame, and because I'll go into that corner of my, my studio, where the paperwork is piled, and I'll shame myself with like how ridiculous it is, right. But knowing that, if I occasionally do like maybe once a year,
00:16:48
Speaker
at most once a year, I will literally force myself and I'll take a couple of hours out, I will put ah on my double bed, I will make them but make the bed and use the bed as a way of sorting out all my documents into the right files. I do all of that and it's painful.
Strategies for Managing ADHD Challenges
00:17:13
Speaker
I hate it. I know though at the end that ah it's like, oh God, that feels so much better that I've done that.
00:17:22
Speaker
So the logic is like, you know it's going to liberate you. It's like one thing. It's like, oh, if I need to find a document, I'll find it really easily and I'll won't shame myself about it. Give myself a hard time. Yeah. Or or the pain, you know, of like half an hour or maybe two hours because you can't find a document.
00:17:47
Speaker
Mm-hmm. Yeah and has that i mean recently I lost my certificate of the certificate of ownership of my my car I Need it I really needed it um To get my to register in a new residency where I am in Italy. I couldn't find it Could not find it. Oh man stress Yeah, so ah yeah, so yeah, I think the the key is to kind of is to know whether your disassociates disassociation is helpful or it's yes so or or or or it isn't Yeah, and I tend to think personally like if it's a short disassociation like there's there's a lot going on and I just and and and and I literally go into my little sort of bubble yeah yeah yeah i' and my phone and and and that's my entire world right right there and everything else out outside doesn't exist.
00:18:53
Speaker
ye um That's okay for ah for a while but but if it's but if I'm disassociating about things that big things, you know, like and um and that's the cause that it's it's a big anxiety thing, like, you know, a relationship thing or sort of taxes thing or something. Yes. Or, you know, your parents died or whatever. Then yeah at some point you have to kind of go, OK, well, I'm I'm just burning up hours staring at my phone or staring at the wall or whatever and not doing
00:19:28
Speaker
Yeah. not Yeah. It's different to deal with the thing. Yeah. It's as if there's like there's like many different degrees of disassociation, I think. There are those times where it was almost like zombie-like.
00:19:44
Speaker
And you're it' probably mixed in with burnout, probably. And it's just overwhelmed. You're just overwhelmed and you're literally like, it's like you've you've taken some, you know, ah some pharmaceuticals, you know, and you're just like shut down and stuff. Yeah, yeah, yeah, totally. oh It's all, sorry, go on.
00:20:07
Speaker
i was ah I was going to say that there's an interesting thing where I will slide into my interview because i'm I'm autistic as well, like and or whatever. like Whatever your hyper focus is on that at that time, or whatever your special interest is at that time, where it's like,
00:20:27
Speaker
sculpting, drawing, painting, you know, whatever it is, you know, I will it disappear down into, into that, like, it's, ah it's almost like, Oh, yeah.
00:20:40
Speaker
um did ah The hyper focus on some other
00:20:48
Speaker
things, special interest or whatever, is like, oh, that's what I'll i'll i'll do. so So even, you know, so that is a way of oh disassociating. Yeah, as well. That's an interesting point. Yeah, I'll i'll do that that a lot. I've got here a similar thing, a different way of disassociation dis disassociating.
00:21:12
Speaker
ah My imagination Right. Imagination. Imagine. I remember when ah I had a teacher at middle school called Mr. Gill. He used to sit the whole class down in middle school and read us role dial books. And he introduced me to a whole world of where, you know, you could, you know, go into like a disassociated state and just like use in your go to world, you know, in your imagination, you know, to escape.
00:21:41
Speaker
you know, every lovely warm place and you know, this is really special thing. that Thanks to him. He found to me that imagination is like dissociation, as are another form of dissociation causes drugs and alcohol. Ooh.
00:21:57
Speaker
You know, massive, massive. Oh, yeah. it's Especially if you have ADHD and you have an addictive nature, you know, and you're disassociating and avoiding, and then you're kind of going to, you know, drugs, drink, whatever yeah is your poison. A really interesting thing came up was as I was doing research on this subject. Someone came up with the, put it into context by using an example, a thing that the um certain animal in Africa does, the impala.
00:22:27
Speaker
Oh, I love the Impala. The Impala, lovely. Which is probably similar to a Thompson's gazelle. Probably. Or probably sort of the mates that kind of hang out on the on the on the African plains. Mm hmm. Share a cocktail or two. But they feign death. Right, as a coping mechanism. Right. All right. As a survival thing, they've learned.
00:22:58
Speaker
i think people have also done that as well yes
00:23:05
Speaker
They're just like, it's a total zoning out and zoning it out. And like, um this example is on YouTube about this. It's amazing, ah amazing. um Specifically in the context of ADHD and disassociation. ah Really interesting kind of um like example, ah what's it say?
00:23:29
Speaker
ah Contextualizing. All right, that'll do. Yeah, I love that. I love that. What else have you got before I move on to like how to, you know, some some out to some ways to help? There was something. was there were something Oh yes, there is. There's another type of disassociation. There's also involuntary disassociation. This is when it gets bad. Oh boy. It's not on any level.
00:24:04
Speaker
It's not like you're choosing pretty much everything we described up to now. There's an element of choice in it. Let's face it. Bye. All right, consciously or not. But there are people that has pretty serious serious condition with people do involuntary involuntary disassociate, and potentially for years, as well. But sometimes not sometimes for shorter periods, but they're not particularly ah conscious or in control of when and how they disassociate, they're just going to shut down mode.
00:24:39
Speaker
That was me making the noise of shutting down. I wouldn't be be be surprised if if that's kind of but if that's trauma related.
00:24:54
Speaker
Oh, yeah, but apparently a lot of disassociated trauma related. um This isn't something I've become a personal kind of anecdote. I suffered when I was in middle school, I suffered from like ah bullying for for months from this lad.
00:25:11
Speaker
And God, it was just pure and utter hell. And I pretty much, I could look you back, I can see myself pretty much disassociating from life like full time, you know, 24 seven in a zone, right? Right. Yeah. don talking To anyone, you know, just hoping it will go away a bit like the impala.
00:25:38
Speaker
It's just dropping dead. I was playing dead and supposedly zoned out ah hoping to go away. Luckily it did go away. Right. you know I don't want to name any names. David May as his name. Bastard. Bastard. If If you're listening. Right. Yeah. that Anyway.
00:26:04
Speaker
That makes me think, okay, well, that's how you get to school, right? As you kind of almost disassociate your yourself. Oh, totally. Up into school. And then I was thinking, well, that I've kind of done that at work as as well, you know, like, yeah, I've had various sort of bosses who have been quite aggressive, I mean, and traumatizing. Yeah. um And and you kind of get up and you almost like have to disassociate yourself all the way into your yeah into your car and into and into to the office.
00:26:42
Speaker
but did thought she did my Otherwise, I wouldn't have but never got to work otherwise. Right. But it's just a thing, you know, it but it is a lot of this is trauma related, you know, and, you know, yeah at some point in our, you know, in our early years, we realized that as other people find other ways, but you know, in our cases, we found that this was a way of surviving at some point. Yeah. A difficult situation.
00:27:11
Speaker
That kind of works. That kind of does a thing. But yeah, I mean, like, you know, in the end, if I have to disassociate myself to get into into job into into work, that will only work for a a finite amount of time. In other words, I just kind of go, right, that's it. this is This is taking too big a toll on my life. I have to get that. I had a situation once I was working for a terrible, terrible boss.
00:27:43
Speaker
um weirdly we kind of stayed in contact anyway because it was kind of a nice bloke just a really bad boss very narcissistic i suddenly found one day i lived at one end of uh london crouch end the job was at the other end of london the south near uh wimbledon Putney, that kind of area. It's a long journey. I realized and I didn't realize it until I was kind of unconscious of it, but suddenly became conscious of it. I was getting on the train at the back of the train to prolong my walk along the platform to the agency.
00:28:23
Speaker
oh boy and i realized i'm literally on the platform getting off again at the back of the train right it's where the metro where the underground goes over ground onto Wimbledon towards Wimbledon and i realized i was like oh Paul What are you doing? Getting always getting on the back of the train. That's a bad sign. We need to start bailing out. That's not good for me. No. All right. I'm going to move on to how can we manage disassociation. um So I've got a few here. One is is a grounding techniques. So there's some simple things that you can do to bring yourself back into the present ah moment.
00:29:06
Speaker
so yeah and
00:29:10
Speaker
One is, I don't know if you heard this, this is the five, four, three, two, one method. I came across it yesterday, yeah. Right, where you name five things you see, four things you feel, three things you hear, two things you smell and one thing you taste. Exactly, yeah. So just kind of trying to engage the senses. It doesn't necessarily have to be that, but even if it's just one thing of each, you know, just trying to bring the, bring yourself out of your little sort of heavenly bubble. Yeah.
00:29:49
Speaker
i and got as well yeah I've got ah communication, you know, because they by the time, if you're like 57, like me, and disassociation isn't just a pattern, it's a constant. um right and so It doesn't always have to be a bad thing. If you're communicating it in the right way with the people that really matter to you, like your your partner, right? So look,
00:30:15
Speaker
I know, you know, um this is this is my way of dealing with it. There is an element of accepting that this is how I'll always be. But you could be having a conversation like, I don't want to leave you out of that.
00:30:31
Speaker
I'm not consciously trying to push you away. Actually, quite the opposite. I just wanted to communicate a little. Look, I'm going through a phase at the moment and, you know, it doesn't have to be negative, actually, if you let people come along for the ride.
00:30:47
Speaker
Right. It kind of feels like I just need my time for my brain to process, yeah to process this thing. And therefore it's kind of like, I'm, I'm, I'm just going to create some distance. Yeah. And then at some point I'll pop out yeah after I've worked out somehow that that my brain has wrapped itself around Yeah, whenever it is that it needs to think think about or calm down from the the time to like close tabs.
ADHD Mindset: Open Tabs and Mental Clarity
00:31:18
Speaker
I would like the the analogy, you know, that ADHD mind is like having hundreds of tabs open on your computer all the time.
00:31:29
Speaker
Yeah. um And it's like, okay, it's a bit like, you know, you may be communicating to your partner, look, I just need this time to like, close down some tabs. Yep. Yeah. And another good one is to like, schedule. Well, I said, I'm gonna say schedule regular breaks, but it is really about looking after yourself.
00:31:51
Speaker
Right, because if you're shutting down because of and anxiety and stress and whatever, like taking care of the in in environment around you and and you. So it's like, are you sleeping enough? um you Are you taking your meds if you're taking your meds? Just generally looking after yourself will help with the anxiety, which will then help with the with the disassociation.
00:32:20
Speaker
yeah and so Yeah. And that's it. You know, ah be kind to yourself. Dissociation isn't a failure. It's your brain doing its best to cope. So recognize it. I think of yourself. Move forward. Give it a hug. Give it a hug. Keep that part of you a hug. It's like it's part of you. It's probably not going to go away.
00:32:46
Speaker
No, it's how manage it's like, yeah, it's how we built. Yeah. You know, it's a comfort blanket. I like going there often. Well, yes, exactly. That's, that's the thing, you know, like it's, it is helpful and it's harmful and it's helpful. um Yeah.
00:33:05
Speaker
Yeah. And if you understand, yeah the more you understand it, the better you can sort um sort of manage it, you know, but you know, we have tools, we have, cur we have each other, we have humour to kind of get us through. Yeah. You know, we have, we have interesting podcasts. Yeah.
00:33:25
Speaker
Nice, you've got like have you got any other final thoughts? but i haven't good ah yeah No, I think that's pretty much my my lot. Then let's head back into the car and we'll go to the post office and we'll pick up some mail. No, we've got a quiz.
00:33:48
Speaker
We've got a quiz. All right, back in the car, back to the town hall. Back it Back it up. There we go. Jesus. All right. Back in the town hall. Back in the town hall parked. Roaring fire. Special parking space specifically for quiz time.
00:34:13
Speaker
Yeah. Nice. Quiz time. All right. Quiz time, Martin. All right. We have a quiz. It was your birthday two days ago. It was. And 60. I know. 60. It's an interesting number, 60, Martin. 60 is an even composite number composed of three prime numbers multiplied together round of applause for them oh so all you math nerds out out there loving it it's about the most rounded number you can get 60 all right
00:34:53
Speaker
I like that. Yeah. Yeah. Even the characters are rounded, the six and the oh, even the characters are rounded. So I've, I've, I've created a quiz dedicated celebrating your, your 60 years, Martin. Okay. Um, is some more relevant than others. Okay. If you did want to know my, my thoughts on the number 60, it's blue. It's a blue number. Lovely. Mm-hmm.
00:35:21
Speaker
There we go. Right. That was it. All right. OK, so I've got usual usual thing, Martin. I've got um a list of five things. OK. Of which one you choose that is actually well.
00:35:37
Speaker
ah let Let's use the first one as an example. you are American people born in the same year as you, Martin, one of which of this list is not true. okay They weren't born the same year as you. 1964.
00:35:53
Speaker
yeah okay ninety sixty four First on this is Mr Keanu Reeves. Take a bow. Right. Mr. Brad Pitt, take a similar bow. Wow. I am in a good mix of people so far. You're in a sandwich, you're like a club sandwich with also, also in a club sandwich, also in in a club sandwich of the, uh, the Sandra Bullock. All right. Okay. And El McPherson.
00:36:30
Speaker
All right, wow. And last but not least, Johnny Depp, one of which of these five was born in 1964, Martin. It wasn't. But which one? All right, I'm going to go. He's Brad Pitt, Sandra the Bullock, Elliot the Macpherson and Johnny the Depp.
00:36:50
Speaker
I will go with um but with but Brad the Pit. That's going to be my my shot in the dark. No, it's the Johnny of the Depp.
00:37:03
Speaker
oh johnny of the deaf you share birthday with wow good birthday good company oh shockingly you know keeping themselves together thank you thank you you're welcome i i just included myself in that in that rather esteemed list of lovely actors It's your birthday,
Martin's Birthday Quiz and Historical Events
00:37:28
Speaker
mate. Do whatever you like. I've got a UK version of that coming up. But in the meantime, one of these songs was not a top 10 hit when you were born, Martin. ah One of these songs was not a top 10 hit in the UK when you were born. Number one, I only want to be with you by Dusty Springfield. Right.
00:37:52
Speaker
I want to hold your hand. I don't want to hold your hand. That's the song title, Martin. I don't really want to. I could hold it if you wanted me, if you force me. By the Beatles. Yeah. It's over. It's not. Actually, it's just a song title by Roy Orbison. Okay. Oh, yeah.
00:38:12
Speaker
um dominique by the singing nun martin dominique by the singing nun yeah sounds unlikely does it doesn't it or is it Number five, 24 hours from Tulsa by Gene Pitney. One of those, Dusty of the Springfield, the Beatles, Roy of the Orbison, The Singing Nun or Gene of the Pitney, one of those did not have a top ten hit when you were born.
00:38:46
Speaker
ah blow it well I am going to go with The Singing Nun, because I've heard of all the others and I can vaguely remember their songs, but that one, The Singing Nun, sounds a bit Catholic, sounds a bit saintly, sounds a bit... It's very Catholic, it sounds so true.
00:39:05
Speaker
um
00:39:08
Speaker
it was Roy Orbison Roy Roy the the orb he did have a hit ah but it wasn't on your birthday it was it was about three months before oh was it actually on my on my birthday yeah all right all right okay all right i see gotcha oh yeah i was precise i was precise so the beetles were big Which is why I think my middle name Paul. That's that's why I have Paul as ah as a middle name. Is that why you're called Paul? It's also why might my sister's called Jane. Paul McCartney was dating Jane Asher. Oh. That's how imaginative my parents were. Well, I think my first name
00:40:04
Speaker
was George Martin, the Beatles producer. I think that's why I'm called Martin. I a full Beatles. So that right so if if anyone wants to know how big the Beatles were, you've got two people here and our names are just all Beatles. Well, I shared the same birthday as Ringo Starr.
00:40:34
Speaker
Do you now? Yes. Nice. And I once had a colostomy in hospital and the bed next to me having a colostomy at the same time was George Harrison. And you see, in the end, you link all four betos. Wait, hang on a second. I made it up. Oh, damn it.
00:40:56
Speaker
Anyway, so... am and I'm zero for two currently. Zero for two. UK people, peeps, famous peeps, born in the same year as you, Martin. one of what One of these five was not born the same year, okay? Okay. One, Bill of the Bailey.
00:41:20
Speaker
Bill of the Bailey. Lovely Bill Bailey. Love him. The comedian Lee Evans. Oh, right. Also another comedian. Yes. Jane of the Horrocks. Oh, she's also another actress.
00:41:38
Speaker
And yeah, comedian. Yeah. Um, Mary Ann Hobbs, lovely, lovely lady, DJ, BBC DJ, very cool as, right. Last but not least, Fat Boy Slim Martin. Which one? Bill of the Bailey, Lee of the Evans, Jane of the Horrocks, Mary Ann of the Hobbs, or Fat Boy of the Slims? Fat Boy of the Slim, whose name is What was it? Oh God, now. all He was part of, not the beautiful South, the ones before that. Was it the beautiful South? No, before the beautiful South, what were they called? I have no idea, but I've got to find, um I've got a fat boy slim was.
00:42:32
Speaker
the DJ known as Quentin... and ah Norman Cook. Norman Cook, yes. That's the guy. Are you looking at his birthday, Martin? Are you cheating? No, other but i I just wrote Fat Pusslin. He went to Rygate as well. yeah dot he went to he he he is a So ah we both went to Rygate Art College and he went to Rygate with grammar.
00:43:06
Speaker
oh as did Keir Starmer so um if if we were around so we may well have bumped into him in uh sure in the high street sure we did totally did and not known his future greatness as a as a dj um and potential slimness or his potential fatness. Or fatness you choose. Yeah, with potential boyness. I'm going to go with ah Bill Bailey is was not. Is fat boy slim?
00:43:49
Speaker
fat boy slimming them in. What year was he born in then? 63, year before. sixty A year older than you.
00:44:01
Speaker
oh wow yeah No one's the cook. Jesus. Okay. Slightly simpler one. I'm going to read out to you six. Six. Six. No, sorry. Five. Five ways of saying 60, but in different languages. Oh, Jesus. Here we go. One of which is a fake one.
00:44:28
Speaker
okay this is going to be entertaining oh yes that was the idea number one zig zig which is german zek zig okay this is weird all right sitini which is swahili okay hatvan hungarian all right septeg which is esperanto all right last but not least
00:45:04
Speaker
Kuzikmenta, which is Finnish, Martin. All right. One of which, one of those is not sexy. So that was chiture German. Zekzig. Zettini, Swahili. Hatvan, Hungarian. Zebdek, which is Esperanto. And in
00:45:33
Speaker
was Okay. i am goodnna i The only way that I'm going to be able to even fathom this one is to kind of go, what language would you least want to offend anyone?
00:45:48
Speaker
Right. Saves. Saves. Yeah. Yeah. Which one would you feel safe just making crap about? And I'm going to go with German. I'm going to say that you made the German one up. No, it's Zeptek, which is Esperanto, but it's 70 in Esperanto. All right. Oh, Sept. So I can see we got confused, Marty, now. I can see that. Sept is seven.
00:46:19
Speaker
isn't it? January, February, March, April, May, June, July, April, May, June, July, August, September, nine. It's a sept, okay. September's the ninth month, but maybe it wasn't always as maybe in the, in antiquity, September was the seventh month and that's why we have sept. Yeah. I don't know. Could be. Okay. so Last one. Okay. Man. Just to say face. Face, pride, both. Um,
00:46:47
Speaker
um Some events, Martin. I'm going to list some events that happened on your birthday on 16th December, right? um Okay. yeah um Italian government asked for international help on this day in history. It asked for international help to help keep the leaning tower pieces from toppling over. Okay. One. Two. It happened in 1903 in New York Wall Street vendor Italo Macchione was granted the patent for a mold making ice cream cones.
00:47:27
Speaker
right okay so it's the first man to invent the ice cream cone he had the patent granted for on the day of your birth oh wow 1903 1897 the first submarine with an internal internal combustion engine was demonstrated okay cones to submarines who'd have thought it 1912, this is number four, Martin, 1912 on your birthday, the first US postage stamp, picturing in an aeroplane with a 20 cent parcel post, it was issued on that day. First US postal stamp, 1912. I was amazed how late that is. Yeah, that shouldn't be. with Last but not least,
00:48:24
Speaker
that's That's five. No, it's four. Five is 1913. Charlie Chaplin begins his film career at Keystone on a whopping wage of one hundred and fifty dollars a week. Blimey. So we've got ah Italian government and the Art of Tarapisa. OK, we've got a patent for the the ice cream cone.
00:48:52
Speaker
Oh, yeah. First submarine, first US post postage stamp and Charlie Chaplin's first wage bill, wage packet. All right. I'm going to go with so these are all things that happened on my birthday, except for one. Yes. And I'm going to go for the ice cream cone. Wasn't our birthday. with I'm so glad you chose that because it's your birthday and you've got your last the last one you got right.
00:49:21
Speaker
Oh! It happened the day after your birthday. Jesus Christ. The day after. Oh, I remember now. Yes, it was the day after. Of course. You're feeling silly now, aren't you? Yeah, now I think back. Oh, yeah.
00:49:39
Speaker
but remember Because before that, you know, ice cream is dripping all over your arm and yeah. Right. I know. It was like, oh, thank God. You know, it was all my Italians on. Yeah. Yeah. It was on my birthday and the ice cream was was dripping down my hands and it was like, yeah if only if there was a cone, if only someone invented a cone. Right.
00:50:02
Speaker
Yeah, yeah. try and then And then the next day, it was like, ah, finally. All right. Well, I i not like to be in the 70s, we used to get like ah two pieces of wafer and put the ice cream between it. Oh, yeah. An ice cream sandwich. Yeah. Yeah.
00:50:22
Speaker
That was a thing. It used to come in paper wrapping. Do you remember? Yeah, that's right. That's right. I always wanted the less ice cream and more wafer. I always felt like it could have been approved. I can remember when I was, I don't know, maybe six or seven.
00:50:48
Speaker
You know when the ice cream van would like you would hear it coming down down the street playing with me. Yeah, right. And the ice cream van playing playing sleeves. um Yes, often. um And then you're then you you go into a mad panic, right? Because it was like,
00:51:06
Speaker
ah but god you ice cream of you mom um um It was like, it was like you would go from absolute calm of just like playing with your toys to like a ah yeah complete wreck of a state of a person. Yeah. And and then you joined the queue.
00:51:22
Speaker
And then I got my my dad does like you ah to kind of go outside and he said, all right, well, what do you want? ah And I was looking at the ah the choices that have like this sticky poster that they have on the on this on the on the window of the van, which I noticed You know, like printed inks there, and when you print a poster, it's made up of cyan, yellow, magenta and yeah and and black. And the cyan ink was never and scientists says sun resistant. It was always like fading away. Yes, um fading away. Right. and and And I wanted this ice lolly that was called cider apple. I think it was like a cider apple yeah flavor. Yes. yes
00:52:13
Speaker
ye which I hadn't had before and my dad was like, are you sure you want this cider apple? And I was like, yeah, yeah, I want the cider apple. Give me a cider. And then I got the cider apple and then I licked it. That's horrible. I always went back to the plain old lemonade, lolly. Simple, simple. Have you ever heard of the ice cream wars that went on during the 70s in Glasgow?
Nostalgia and Humor in ADHD Life
00:52:43
Speaker
revolved around ice cream vans in Glasgow o and i yeah because were dealing drugs on the ice cream vans and it was controlled by the Glaswegian Mafia and it all kicked off. People died.
00:52:58
Speaker
people died not for the ice cream not for not for the flakes not for the 99 flakes well that is a stuff under the counter that's a fab story um that's a that's a ice cream yeah joke if if anyone gets that um okay my i would i would obviously the the the king was the 99 It's like a cone and then an ice cream scoop and then a cabbage flake shoved in. That was always like the fucking number one. That was the I think but that was well, yeah. And then when I used to go to with my grandmother, I used to go to she used to take us to broad stairs kicking and screaming.
00:53:49
Speaker
for a couple of weeks. It was a pure hell. And um I remember there and nowhere else, it was always broad stairs. You could have a Mr. Whippy, but it was a half vanilla, half strawberry Mr. Whippy. And that to me, was just that was the special treat with ah with a flake. Never went for the double flake. it was it That was over the top. That that was like and was like, no.
00:54:16
Speaker
know your station in life exactly go for the double that's all about proportion that's that's for posh people that's for people exactly yeah i'd know my place keep to the one flake keep to the singular flake mm-hmm nice all right let's let's let's jump into um into into feedback Yeah, ah i I have one which is ADHD body that ad forty double,
00:54:56
Speaker
um this fun tik to um said ah that she' is she is off to Spotify to download our podcast to i enforce ah my confirmation bias that we are collectively funnier. Yes. I think we um I did a post, but yes, we did a podcast a couple of weeks ago, which is, are people with ADHD funnier? Yes. If you haven't seen it, go and check it out. And we are. um I think so. um And then she says, I'm five minutes into your podcast,
00:55:41
Speaker
and I'm rolling on the floor laughing. Rofl. Yeah. She's showing my age using that acronym. um Yeah, there we go. Nice, nice. Actually, by coincidence, I was listening to, I don't know, just before we did the postcards and driving, driving around, as I ever want to do, listening to a podcast. And it was um the comedian, English comedian, called Fern Brady. She's just won an award, actually. And she's autistic. She's won a comedy award. So, you know, it's like, you know, that yeah, we are funnier end of end of future if you want to look her up, look up phone Brady on wherever you get your podcast is from phone Brady, you can find loads of ah interviews with her.
00:56:30
Speaker
funny as hell. Absolutely brilliant. She's a Edinburgh-less, I think. She's Scottish-less. Really, really, really funny. Nice. All right. Well, that just leaves me to say that ADHD Ville is delivered fresh every Tuesday to all providers of fine podcasts.
Podcast Promotion and Closing Remarks
00:56:50
Speaker
Oh, yes. Subscribe to the pod and rate us most disassociatively interesting and fun. And feel free to just to correspond at will in the comments. But wait, there's more if you wish to see our
00:57:08
Speaker
beautiful faces Then Sally Forth to the YouTubes and the TikToks. What's Sally Fields? And you can pick up a quill and email us at ADHDville at gmail dot.com. But in the meantime, be fucking kind to yourself. And I'm perceiving fellow ADHDers, know thy selves, sons of the hounds, come hither and get the flesh. Absolutely. There, I know what that means.