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Episode 18: You Bought The Ticket, We're Taking The Ride: The Story Of Our First Pro Wrestling Death Match
61 Plays8 years ago
This week Garrett & Derrick welcome their first guest to the podcast, Metal Dave! The boys took a trip to GCW's The Untouchables to witness their first death match! Did glass rain down upon them like hail? Yes. Did Garrett get Nick Gage's blood all over his hands? Yes. The boys truly witnessed a horror show this weekend and lived to tell the tale! Don't miss this one!
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Transcript
Opening & Excitement
00:00:00
Speaker
Hey everybody, welcome to another episode of Predetermined, a pro wrestling hangout. I'm your host, Garrett Callender. And with me, as always, a man who I can touch again for the second time in the history of this podcast, because he is right next to me. We're in the same room, Derek Halpin. This is a podcast, so they can't see what you just did, but you did just stroke my face. Yes, it was sensual. After what we saw last night, I need some sensual. Yeah, we need some love. Some affection. Today is a special day. It is a special day for a couple of reasons.
00:00:30
Speaker
One, we witnessed a fucking murder last night. You're gonna have to wait till after the music to find out if that's true. But also, why else, Derek? All-in tickets go on sale in just a couple hours. Yes, and those are the only two reasons today's special. Not because we have our first guest ever in the history of this podcast,
Introducing Metal Dave
00:00:52
Speaker
Metal Dave. What's up, predetermined listeners? It's Metal Dave here.
00:00:55
Speaker
God, that was a good voice. I can already tell like that voice is getting somebody hard. This is your podcast now. Yeah, you just took over. Well, I'm sorry. You know, makes sense. As far as a run in, do some heel shit. I think they're going to love you. Give me a cheer. Oh, my God. After last night, give me some fucking razor blades. Some CDRs, please. You know what else you can get me? What do you want? My goddamn music hit it.
00:01:51
Speaker
All right, and we're back. Jesus Christ, guys. So, for a long time I've been saying, like, some of the stuff we're going to, I've been saying, we're going to this so you don't have to. And I feel like a lot of the stuff we've been going to, people have been like, I would have loved to have gone to that.
Chicago Deathmatch Experience
00:02:08
Speaker
I think you're wrong. I think you're just being an asshole and going to things that I would actually like to be at.
00:02:15
Speaker
Last night, we truly went to something that I don't think many of you would love to be at. Yeah, I don't think too many people are going to envy the shit that we saw last night, but I'm sure a few of our listeners actually are into that. So keep that in mind as we're going over what happened at that show last night. There may be a few people who like seeing 50 billion light tubes get destroyed just a few feet away from them.
00:02:38
Speaker
I mean, I should say, the reason we went to this show is I received, we were coming up, or I was driving up to Chicago for the Ring of Honor, or the Ring of Honor New Japan War of the World show, that is in a few hours. So we still haven't gone to that yet. But I got a text from Metal Dave saying, GCW is doing a show the night before. It's a deathmatch. We got front row, you should go.
00:03:04
Speaker
And I did. It did. I will say at this point, everything that happened to us last night, I will take responsibility for. This is my fault. And we reminded you throughout the show. Oh, it was relentlessly so. I always loved CZW's Tournament of Death, Necrobutcher, and Sicknic Mondo were always like favorites of mine to watch.
00:03:26
Speaker
I expected part of what we were going to, I didn't expect this. This was a little beyond what I was anticipating.
00:03:35
Speaker
I will say this because you did bring up a name. You brought up Necro Butcher. Every week I tell people, rate, review, subscribe, rate, review, subscribe, rate, review, subscribe. Write that review. We want those five star reviews. Well, somebody gave it a listen and thought, this deserves a one star review because I'm a huge Necro Butcher fan and you didn't say kind things about him.
Fan Reactions and Humor
00:03:56
Speaker
So Mr. One Star, eat my dick. Metal Dave loves him and he's here.
00:04:00
Speaker
Hey, we love Necro Butcher now and you're not even listening. I thought you were going to flat out accuse Dave was the guy who gave us the one star review. That was not me. It was not me. That would have been a total heel move to do. Although I was wearing the choose death shirt yesterday. So was it? Oh, you piece of shit. Like the review was left from Necro Butcher's left nut. That was the title of the person who left that. Sounds like Dave. And he just said you disrespected Papa Necro one star.
00:04:27
Speaker
I'm not even mad about that. If we disrespect your favorite wrestler and your favorite wrestler, we should probably own that. Yeah, just, hey, different ice cream, man, different flavors. And that flavor, fucking blood. I feel like that's going to be a theme today, which is that there's different styles of wrestling for everybody. Last night was a lot of shit that's not my cup of tea.
00:04:50
Speaker
I thought we were there, Dave, because that was your cup of tea. And then I find out, like, 15 seconds before the show starts, that you've never been to one of those before. I've actually never truly been to a deathmatch show. I was really excited a couple of years ago into a time at Dreamers House of Hardcore. I thought we were getting some of that. Pretty much everything I've seen has been online because, you know, Midwest is like New Jersey has that market cornered. So that was a new experience for everybody.
00:05:16
Speaker
So when my chemical romance, you know, a few years back, we're selling those New Jersey murder scene shirts. It makes more sense now, you know.
GCW Show Expectations
00:05:28
Speaker
Knowing what we know now and speaking to the people from New Jersey there. Yes, it's just a bloodbath and thumbtacks everywhere in New Jersey. I've never been there. Prove me wrong.
00:05:37
Speaker
Holy shit, next year mania's in New Jersey, so that means GCW's gonna have a balls out hometown show. And you know what, for the finale, we're bringing Gigi Allen back from the dead to shit in your mouth and slit your throat. That's what last night felt like. It really did. I don't wanna say that every wrestler looked, okay, going into it, I kinda thought, I bet every wrestler's gonna look like Gigi Allen, and I bet everybody in the crowd is gonna look like Gigi Allen.
00:06:07
Speaker
Not entirely wrong. Well, I want to cut in real quick. We released a couple of videos yesterday of us on our way to the show. Let's start from the beginning on this. Not everybody listening to this podcast right now probably knows that
00:06:23
Speaker
Garrett and I really had no idea the level of shit that we were getting into yesterday and specifically me I had no fucking clue and so it was a couple hours before the show started we pulled up a best of 2017 GCW video on YouTube and
00:06:38
Speaker
Holy shit. The mood changed dramatically once we saw people getting punctured with things and hanging from their flesh. And then I realized, oh wait, this is what I'm being exposed to. And the guy who's taking me didn't know that it was going to be this bad.
00:06:56
Speaker
It was like whatever I had in my head that this was gonna be like what's funny is when we were going I think the worst thing I thought was man I'm just not a big fan of unprotected head shots with a chair
00:07:12
Speaker
How naive! How fucking dumb was I, Dave? Two hours in, you're begging for unprotected headshots. I was like, just getting hit in the head of concussion is fine. When I was 13, I saw that all the time during the Attitude Era. What now? Oh, I'll tell you what now. Okay, so first off, a couple hours before we're starting to head to this place, which it was in Villa Park? Villa Park, yeah. Villa Park. A tweet goes out from GCW saying,
Venue Peculiarities
00:07:40
Speaker
just so you know GPS is taking everybody to the wrong place put in the name of this fucking store whatever the what was the store it was Foreman Mills it's like a discount retail outlet do the best way to put it for indeed it's important also know to this point it is right next door to the five star flea market
00:08:02
Speaker
Jesus Christ. Okay. So they put up a picture of this Foreman Mills, which is just, you know, like an outlet clothing store, but they're like, don't go in there. Drive around back. And then it showed like a picture of a, like a doorway that was kind of in an alleyway between two buildings. It's where you would expect people who are working somewhere to go outside for a smoke break.
00:08:25
Speaker
It's where you buy weed. It's where it's like, I'll meet you behind the Foreman mills, you got the stuff, and the guy actually is bringing you meth. And which is not too far off from what actually happened. I bought meth last night. So we pull up, we're like, where the fuck are we? As we're driving by, we see a sign that was made with a Sharpie that's like, wrestling this way.
00:08:47
Speaker
And then as I start to see people who look more like Gigi Allen, you know, then we're there. We've arrived. And already, I have a lot of anxiety about cutting a line. Dave and his friends were already in line, and this was a line I wasn't comfortable cutting.
00:09:05
Speaker
What I can say as far as like people as far as line even when we're in there somebody's already smoking inside Nobody's stopping him. Love that. Love that. Like when I see cigarettes being smoked indoors I'm like, this is that's what kind of party we're
00:09:20
Speaker
Um, so many people are wearing the murder death kill shirts. Uh, we had to point out as far as, because, uh, our friend Greg, who was there had never heard of a wrestler named Schlack had heard of that. It's like, what the fuck is a Schlack? It's like, it's that horrible looking person on the, uh, and the picture of the shirt, the one behind you. And he just immediately went inside. So we're, we're in there. And by the time call, then the, uh, the party bus shows up. Mother fuck. Okay.
00:09:47
Speaker
Gotta go ahead and say, like, when you're going into a murder show, that's what I'm gonna call this. This was just fucking murder, what I watched these guys do to each other. As we go on, later we're gonna have a debate about whether or not this is even pro wrestling.
00:10:02
Speaker
I will, I think I'm gonna have to argue with Derek that it technically is because I did see a German suplex. It did result in a man's spleen falling out of his body, but you know, a move is a move. Where the fuck was I going? Oh, party bus. This is a dry show. No alcohol is sold here. That means these crazy motherfuckers that are going to watch these guys cut each other's bodies up are doing it sober.
00:10:29
Speaker
That was kind of a, well, we did, part of our crew did sneak in a couple beers there while we were in line to get a little bit of a buzz, which I'm sure helped. Your buddy Greg needed it. Oh, Greg was not having it. He was not having it. There were several times in line, he just grabbed me, he's like, please take me on the bus. I don't want to go by myself. I, okay, I will have to say your buddy Greg made the night for me. He was fucking hilarious, man. He may have been the star of that crew.
00:10:58
Speaker
Yeah, like if this were a buddy comedy he is the guy that is the reasonable one.
00:11:07
Speaker
um but i just remember when you said that guy's name was schlack he's just like fucking schlack fucking schlack what does that say about what kind of show this is when a character kind of name called so uh man dave uh greg is your friend why don't you tell us what happened to dave or to uh greg when he went on the party bus to get a beer this is an important story so the first time greg is desperately needing beer we want to hold our place in lines like okay you have to go by yourself so he'd
00:11:35
Speaker
tail between his legs like a whoop puppy walks off to this horrible looking bus gets on there he comes back within five minutes he's clutching a beer with both hands it's like they're they talked to me distraught like he he looked like he just talked to strangers like his parents told him not to and he did he needed to run away from these people and call an adult
00:11:58
Speaker
so he came to us. So he informs us of a man there who is regaling him unwarranted with the story. He's from Denver. His wife thinks
Eccentric Crowd Encounters
00:12:11
Speaker
he's still in Denver. And he's here at this show in Chicago because he's hoping that this will result in him getting a divorce. He's actively seeking a divorce by lying to his wife going from Denver to Chicago to go watch some deathmatch wrestling in the back of a form in Mills and Villa Park, Illinois.
00:12:30
Speaker
And he's wearing a Hawaiian shirt too. This is an important detail. When you guys described this man to me, I was picturing like an older man, like just down on his luck, probably a pockmark face, heavy bags under the eyes. This guy looked like he was having the fucking time of his life. Like divorce was a party and he was celebrating with murder.
00:12:56
Speaker
He was jazzed when I saw him, when Greg got me back on the bus, which also smelled of illegal things. Greg can't smell, so he couldn't, he couldn't give us that detail. But yeah, he was very excited for people to be on the bus. Like, come hang out! Just like, give us beer, we need to go. I'll take my booze to go, please. While I go late, while I go wait in the scary line. So, okay, when you say the scary line,
00:13:24
Speaker
Okay, I believe the advertisement for this show, the show was GCW Untouchable. Untouchables, the Untouchables. Yeah, the Untouchables. 18 and up. I think it said a hard 18 and up, probably a good 30 and up should have been there. Like this is something you gotta really have some life experience. I don't think age is reflective of like what kind of person should be in there. They should do like tests on the brain to see if you can handle what you're about to see.
00:13:52
Speaker
I need to go through some Daniel Bryan tests right now to see if I'm still capable of going into work on Monday. There were dreams and aspirations that I had that are gone forever because I can't see a world of joy anymore. Do you remember that Nicolas Cage movie 8mm?
00:14:08
Speaker
It's a movie about Nicolas Cage trying to solve some snuff film mysteries. At one point, Nicolas Cage says, there's some things when you see you can't unsee. Nick Cage was in my brain and my heart last night.
00:14:26
Speaker
So oh the people in front of us yeah I should say they were probably ten years old two ten-year-olds in front of us in this fucking murder line Why people are smoking cigs and were there any objections to this I mean for me like but I'm not a parent so who the fuck am I to say I'm saying from the promoter
00:14:42
Speaker
Oh, the promoter didn't even check my tickets. I didn't get Pat down. Okay. Wave people right in. Everyone had knives, probably. Bad scene. When you go to a PWG show in California, you basically get fucking cavity searched. They have a guy who, they ended up getting rid of this dude who did the Pat downs there because he was basically, like he wasn't just grabbing your dick. He was inside of it. Like he goes inside of the foreskin a little bit and runs around just to make sure you're not hiding some cocaine residue in there.
00:15:10
Speaker
This this show is like bring a weapon you need a knife to be here I got the feeling that you could have walked up there with your phone on the wrong screen and You could have said I'm just having issues opening the app But I'm and he would have waved you in I could have showed him some fucking Taylor Swift tickets and I would have been inside the place The more the merrier but we got front row because we're goddamn crazy and I
00:15:37
Speaker
I'm happy we did it. I'm happy we did it. When we sat down and saw only two sides of a four-sided ring, obviously, have barricades, we did not receive that luxury. And honestly, I don't know that it was truly a luxury. It seemed like it was more of a nightmare. That barricade was solely there for people to do spots upon and to move into your lap.
00:16:01
Speaker
Oh, yeah, that was a violence barrier. It would have been a liability because we would have had to not only worry about all the glass and all the various shit being thrown around the room, but we would have had to worry about the barrier getting kicked into our knees. I don't want to get shined. So, I mean, how would you describe this room like the whole night? I feel like I asked you like seven or eight times, where the fuck are we?
00:16:25
Speaker
From what I've been told about this room, so let's just start in describing the room for you. It is a very dark, tile-floored banquet hall.
00:16:36
Speaker
On the ceiling there was one fluorescent light tube fixture. It looked like there was film all over everything. That might also be the show that we were at and the mindset we were in. The room was actually well lit. My brain just made me feel like I was living in a fucking Tim Burton movie. When I look back on it now, it's a murder basement in a fucking John Carpenter film. That's where we were. Well, they had...
00:17:00
Speaker
They had they had post-it notes on the seats for reserved spots They some of them had names on them some didn't just said front were reserved But I remember when we were walking around trying to find out where we were gonna sit I did have in the back of my mind Well, where do I want to die tonight?
Event Warnings & Surprises
00:17:17
Speaker
like thinking like this is gonna be the last decision I get to make tonight. Do I wanna be surrounded by my family, you know, in a nice, comfy room? No, I wanna be where that dude cut off his foot and saw next to Greg screaming. It did feel that way though. It felt like a room that Jigsaw would use to fucking put on some elaborate, maybe that's what happened last night. It truly felt like it. I'm a different man. What I've been told is they do weddings there. Oh my God.
00:17:47
Speaker
I would love to show somebody a video of what I saw last night.
00:18:06
Speaker
Surprisingly, yes. That was the only weapon we didn't see. We all take a moment. So where we were sitting, we had a wall behind us. So we had nowhere to run. When we were front row, we were fucking only row. And we were three feet from the ring.
00:18:22
Speaker
if that, if that. There was not a lot of space. A guy in a corn t-shirt walks up to us before this show starts. He has a joint behind his ear and he's like, hey guys, just so you know, you are gonna be hit with glass tonight. So it's best if you're not on your phones, try not to be looking down. You need to be aware of your surroundings. You're going to get injured. And whether that means actually struck with glass or cancer from inhaling the shit from inside these tubes.
00:18:52
Speaker
I think it was extra scary for me. You guys were actually on the okay part of the wall. The part that I was on was just glass. And the entire time I was sitting there thinking like, if somebody does a spot where they come flying out of the room, I'm going to get tackled through a sheet. I mean, that would be cool as fuck as long as I'm not hurt. Like I would have some street cred, right?
00:19:10
Speaker
I mean no one got hurt last night because wrestling's fake, right? I got a little nick on me. Oh yeah, Derek Showin has his booboos. It looks like a fucking like spider bite. It's these dudes last night. There was a guy that like the only way to describe what his back looked like was picture a normal back and now add 17 bleeding vaginas.
00:19:36
Speaker
Gills. It looked like gills on a fish. It was a secreting blood. It was, uh, you know, it was, it was shape of water up in that place, man. Like, uh, he could breathe underwater. Well, one of the jokes you made was that you could tell how much abuse a guy was going to take by when he came out.
Match Highlights and Atmosphere Changes
00:19:53
Speaker
If his back looked like the surface of the moon.
00:19:58
Speaker
And that was so true, but some guy would come out and be like, well, I know we're going to see some shit here because I can see he's done that before. OK, let's let's break down this card. Do we have the card in front of us anywhere? No, I'll pull it up. Here we go. So the first match we saw was Nate Webb versus Jimmy Lloyd. I got in the ring for this match. You did. You you.
00:20:23
Speaker
just took that opportunity and just dove right in there, which I thought was very brave of you. Well, if I had known what had happened in that ring prior, I probably wouldn't have rolled in. I wouldn't have gotten my hands all over it where I'm... You really need to be tested now. Oh.
00:20:38
Speaker
That's not the first time I touched something gross. Just no, by the end of the night, my hands were covered in blood and I was just a huge germaphobe, fucking mortified. The fact that I didn't cry after that is like, I had just seen too much at that point. Like what was a little blood on me? Yeah, I remember this was at the end of the night when you were trying to make your way back to our seats after they had been unceremoniously moved to create a weapon.
00:21:06
Speaker
And I saw you walking back over there like, yeah, I'm gonna get back in my seat. And you put a hand down on your fucking chair and I'm like, what the fuck are you doing? You pull your hand back up and it's just covered in fucking blood. And I just, what were you thinking? Even more horrifying, blood of undetermined origin. There's no way to know who that came from.
00:21:26
Speaker
It either came from a guy who had been in prison for seven years for bank robbery, or a dude who worships Satan. Both of which, these are not wrestling stories, my friend. You don't know that it wasn't both. A nice cocktail of everything. Well, I mean, they were getting their, each other's blood. Like, they're probably tested, right? I would hope so. Oh, they say they are.
00:21:47
Speaker
So before we get into the Nate Web match and me rolling into the ring, the ring announcer goes in and says, first, before we start, we need to ask, is there anyone in this crowd who would call the fucking cops and get this shut down? Because you need to get the fuck out right now. There's the fucking door. Get the fuck out. And everybody's like, boo, get the fuck out. I don't think anyone left. What would you have done if I had left? If you're just like, all right. I'm the guy that calls the cops. When shit gets a little too scary, I will call the cops.
00:22:16
Speaker
Ugh. That should have been me. I think the fact that no one did means we're all accessories to what happened there, so sham on all of us. Yeah. Well, as we were posting videos throughout the night, my wife has texted me and she says, just curious, if somebody dies, do you go to prison? Is this, are you an accessory to murder? Because you just sat there and let this happen?
00:22:35
Speaker
It's the story of Kitty Genovese. The guy just gets stabbed to death with a light tube and we just do nothing. And everyone applauded! Oh my god. You know what? I think it comes back to this. I am not good at a lot of things. I don't get applause often, so I'll take them wherever I can get. And I think these guys are in the same boat.
00:22:59
Speaker
They're like, I can't do anything that people love enough to get clapped for. So I'm going to kill myself. I get nervous hearing you say that because I get the idea that you would definitely not say that if they were in the room right now. Yeah, I'm actually as I say that I'm like, I can't edit it out now. It's been said. Would you feel comfortable? Would you feel confident looking at and gauge and be like, the only reason you do this is because you're not that good at any of any other activities?
00:23:23
Speaker
Let me go ahead and just say I'm not confident looking at Nick Gage. I think if Nick Gage spoke to me for more than two minutes, I'd start reflexively giving him all of my money. Sure. Yeah. Like you'd walk out to your car and be like, actually, where the fuck are my keys? What did I give him? Everything. So no one called the cops. First match goes on Nate Webb versus Jimmy, Jimmy Lloyd. This match lured us into a false sense of security.
00:23:51
Speaker
It did. I told Garrett and Derek for the match again. Like I know Jimmy Lloyd from last year's tournament of death, where he like started to wrestle for CZW. He took the weed whacker spot three times and during that. So I knew Jimmy Lloyd was into some some sick things. But this match was very tame. Like first for a hardcore match.
00:24:11
Speaker
Nate Webb, maybe even the No Way Jose of GCW, came out to Teenage Dirtbag by Wetus, got everyone dancing, had a conga line going, invited everyone in the ring, that's why I rolled in, gave him a hug before the match started. Maybe the most baby face dude there. As far as deathmatch goes, this guy is just a sweet kind face. I just wanna go on record and note the moment that you compared a guy at GCW to No Way Jose.
00:24:41
Speaker
Which is not, like, no. What's funny is you can look up some old, uh, Nate Web. Nate Web. You can look up some old Nate Web videos and just be like, holy shit, this dude's covered in blood and all fucked up. This, like, this is okay. As it starts, we saw one chair shot to the head and I was like, this is going to be rough. I don't like those unprotected shots. I don't know if I can handle that anymore. Oh, what was to come?
00:25:06
Speaker
So Jimmy Lloyd and Nate Webb and Nate Webb goes over, gets Jimmy Lloyd to dance. They do some. Thanks for coming, everybody. They would do some promos and we move on to to the next like the beginning of the horror show, the next match.
00:25:21
Speaker
Let's see the kickoff show was pretty tame We saw an unprotected chair shot and there was a lawn dart to a chair and a brain buster onto an open chair Which all of those things if I was describing out of context would sound horrifying to the normal wrestling fan But this is not a normal wrestling experience. So then we moved into a miedo extrema versus Alex cologne
00:25:45
Speaker
Alex Cologne, any relation? I don't know, I'm not sure on that. I wouldn't be curious to look that up, just because famous wrestling last name, you would assume if you grabbed that name. Right, if you're using it. Yeah.
00:26:00
Speaker
Um, okay. This is where we're going to run into a little trouble describing all these, these matches because they all sort of run together and that we saw really, really horrific shit one after another. So let's just go and set the scene for you. Um, Nate Webb and Jimmy Lloyd believe the ring.
00:26:19
Speaker
And then all of the ring attendees will call him roadies roadies seems appropriate that are PAs PAs death merchants. They start setting up light tubes bundles of light tubes or just stacks of spare tubes in strategic locations around the ring and.
00:26:43
Speaker
a, what I can only describe as a fervor begins to grow in the crowd, the more light tubes come out, the more he is people like, yeah, and my palms start to get a bit sweaty. I need week were armed heavy. Mom spaghetti, definitely vomit on the sweater. It was it was me and Greg's vomit. It was
00:27:06
Speaker
I'm at a loss for words with some of this. I know going to this show, when you're looking at these other people's faces around the crowd, everyone has seen this before. They all came prepared with safety glasses. They had face masks on to not breathe in the fucking mercury that's going into our throats. And this was just commonplace.
00:27:27
Speaker
like everything that was happening was just like you know tomorrow's mother's day we're gonna go out to we're gonna go get some meatloaf with mom and uh i'm sitting there shrieking like if you get this dvd and you hear somebody i'm gonna back away from the mic and it sounds like this that's but you would follow it up immediately with laughter it was like you were embarrassed that your reflex was the scream and you're like oh but it's funny
00:27:53
Speaker
So all the videos we posted about from the event got pretty much overwhelmingly negative feedback. So people not enjoying what I posted. And I really posted pretty much the tamest shit I got because some of it I thought was too horrific.
00:28:10
Speaker
to share and I didn't want to lose, lose any of you, let alone then ban our account from Twitter. But I will say this, OK, maybe we can start debating the merits of this. I know somebody said they don't like light tubes. They think it's lame and that it doesn't look good.
00:28:25
Speaker
There was a point when a light tube just rolled out of the ring. And when it hit at our feet, it fucking exploded. And it showed me how easy it is for those to explode. So a lot of what's happening, like, you cannot call it fake. Like these dudes are fucking each other up with murder weapons. But the light tubes, it's probably the closest thing you can get to a superkick in a deathmatch.
00:28:49
Speaker
I mean, I would say, yeah, like there was that moment in the Cologne Extremo match where they had like the mop handle with all the light tubes wrapped around it and it's just beautiful arcing overhead smash and it explodes into this cloud of glass and powder. It makes a really impressive sound. It's like, OK, we'll applaud for this.
00:29:08
Speaker
Once we see the aftermath, we might not be so happy. But right now, this is really cool. It's like you hit a move and there's a firework that happens. Yes, exactly. It makes a really pleasing sound. I think it does actually look pretty good. It sucks because if you're sitting front row, you just get fucking... There's debris. They make it rain on you, boy. And the whole time you're worried, is this gonna get in my eye? The answer is yes. Am I gonna have to explain to a doctor? The reason I don't have vision anymore is because I went to this deathmatch show at the back of a Foreman Mills.
00:29:37
Speaker
Derek did say on the way home, like, if I had been blinded during that, I would have never been happy again. Like, I could have never been happy knowing the reason I don't have vision is metal, Dave. So I think this is important. I alluded earlier to the fact that we were blaming you, Dave, throughout the show. Anytime something really extreme happened. Fuck you, Dave. Both of us would just scream, God damn it, Dave.
00:30:02
Speaker
Fuck you, why the fuck are we here? I wish I had, I wish we had a mic rolling on Greg. Oh yes. Like I'm trying to think if I had the best of Greg just to play in the middle of this, like I would listen to that before bed every night just so I have sweet dreams. Like him just being like, what? No, fuck you Dave, fuck you. And he's at the end of the row. So I'm just like, anytime he's like, now this, whatever, who gives a shit? Yeah.
00:30:28
Speaker
Is this what you wanted, Dave? Did you get what you want? Is this what you needed? Well, there you go. He's like, I fucking hate you, Dave. OK, where is Greg's level of, like, what does Greg enjoy outside of pro wrestling? Like, is this like way out of his wheelhouse?
00:30:43
Speaker
This is very much out of Greg's bull house. He likes he likes pro wrestling. He likes cooking because he was a classically trained chef. He's very much familiar with knives. He's seen some things. He's cut his finger in the kitchen. He likes video games, but of like the Zelda variety. He's very much about the whimsical storytelling. Does Greg play Grand Theft Auto? He did. He didn't much care for it.
00:31:09
Speaker
Okay, I'm gonna go ahead and say that should be like a test. Like, have you played GTA? No? Probably shouldn't go to this. Fuck the age limit on the sign out front. And then the next question is, do you play GTA? How much of the storyline did you do? Actually, I just murdered people. Oh, you're good, hop in. Front row, bud.
00:31:31
Speaker
Okay, but as far as wrestling, because a lot of these matches were just... I mean, if you go on and type in GCW, we watched a YouTube video, Best of 2017, I'm putting a warning out there, it is violent. It is gross, you're gonna see muscle tissue leaking out of dude's wounds. It's nasty. Go at your own risk on this.
00:31:55
Speaker
But it's just one after another of violence. And I was like, I don't know if this is how it's going to be. It was something like just kind of every single match has seemed to be like because the guys who are doing this, they actually can wrestle for the most part. There's nobody in there like you would say is like the hack and slash type guy that you might see in some other places. But the amount of actually like wrestling that happened was probably like your first exchange of moves and tests of strength. And then so many picked up tubes and we're off to the fucking races. Yeah, it's
00:32:25
Speaker
It is not a New Japan build to a big spot. It is a... You're right. Actually, maybe it is. Maybe it is. They start with a couple of grabs. They wrestle around a little bit, do a couple of rolls. Then somebody sees a sharp object and stabs the other guy in the head.
00:32:43
Speaker
Because the light tubes, when they're hitting each other, you're not seeing a lot of cuts from the actual explosion of the light tube. That's coming from when they pick up the shattered remains of the light tube and hold it above their head and pound on the top like they're nailing it into their fucking forehead.
00:33:00
Speaker
I'll just take a moment, just think about that. Everybody like really looked like they were reflecting on what they saw last night and like, yeah, I did see a man nail glass into another man 20 times, 30 times, 50 times last night. And again, we just let it happen. No one, no one spoke up. In fact, we cheered. We cheered when it happened.
00:33:20
Speaker
I only cheered because I didn't want them to think that like I did the same thing. Okay. I am genuinely afraid of Nick Gage, which means he is either a wonderful actor or just the most authentic scary man I've ever seen.
00:33:39
Speaker
I don't have an answer for you because everything I've seen like Nick Gage may be one of the last true kayfabe never dies no matter where you are. Wrestlers. I think he's just unpleasant all the time. I think flowers die when he walks on them. What do you think? What kind of deodorant does he use? None. Sea salt and rocks. The river.
00:34:06
Speaker
Like, I want to know, like, I gotta know a lot about him. Like, I would love to do a podcast with Nick Gage in a... You would love to? Well, between glass. While he's back in school. I mean, unfortunately, it's the only podcast we're gonna do that sounds like somebody's through Skype because we are talking through a prison phone. Fuck. Like, when he came out, though, I was... I was cheering Nick fucking Gage because he was standing in front of me. And you know what?
00:34:32
Speaker
I'm with him. I'm not going against him on this. The exit's too far away. I have nowhere to go. There's a wall behind me at one point during this fucking show. This is an important story. Okay, there was a... I'm trying to remember. It was the Joey Janela match, I think. Okay. They had taped light tubes to the ring ropes.
00:34:51
Speaker
And as the match started, I was actually filming the beginning of the match much against the like the warnings at the beginning of the show not to record with your phone and get distracted. Once again, we went to this so you don't have to. Yeah, we're trying to give you the front row experience without all the glass in your mouth. So take that, Meltzer.
00:35:09
Speaker
That's what I did. I leaned over and was like, we're going to the places Uncle Dave won't. And Uncle Dave's like, that's fine. So from my perspective, there's this point in the show where right like, you know, four or five feet in front of us, there's just, you know, there's light tubes being destroyed, like every three seconds, boom, boom, boom. And then somebody grabs a pile of them and they're right next to us.
00:35:31
Speaker
on the ring apron and it looks like they're about to do a spot where something happens and they're going to spill out right into our laps not only the bodies of the wrestlers but the the fucking light a pile of glass right and this is just a nightmare scenario garrett sitting to my left as soon as it looks like that's about to happen he stands up and makes a movement like he's about to run my legs were in the running position like
00:35:54
Speaker
I reached out with both hands, grabbed his hips, and pulled him back because I wasn't going to be the only one who got hurt. I don't know why your reaction wasn't follow me. Like, why was your reaction, we're sitting here, man, we're taking it. We bought the ticket, we take the ride. Right.
00:36:16
Speaker
I don't know what that says about my psyche at the time. It's like, you're going down with me. You're like, we're not not getting on the airplane because you're afraid of heights. We bought this dick. Oh, fuck. Dave, I will say you didn't budge like you were in for the long haul. Oh, like the second that a corn man let us know that it's certain.
00:36:43
Speaker
It's the only way I can describe him. Overzealous sweeper, perhaps once he let us know that we were going to be hit with glass like this is the path I chose. So we're going to sit right here and just let it happen. But yeah, during that joy, you know, a match when it's it's raining ballasts and glass upon us. There were some questions about the choices that I've made in my life that have led me to this point.
00:37:08
Speaker
That match was for sure the worst match. No, I don't mean like worst quality wise. I mean, worst for us. It felt like we were getting hammered on that side. Because these two just had basically two piles of light tubes next to each of them. It was George and Ellen's Cyclope. Yeah. Oh, man. And they were in a constant state of swinging those and just exploding in every direction. And I think like you described it best. It felt like you were walking outside while it was hailing. Yeah.
00:37:34
Speaker
I remember turning my face away from the action for a good 20 seconds and just, Oh, by the end of that match, it looked like your fucking ears had been doing cocaine. Like they were just white with powder. I'm going to be dumber for all the mercury that seeped into my brain through my ears. I'm going to be dumber from a series of bad life choices, but this is just another one on the pile, man.
00:37:59
Speaker
Well, I don't know, but as far as like saying, okay, cause Joey Janelle is there. Joey Janelle has participated in PWG. You've seen him in promotions around the country. Good wrestler. Yes. Like a, like an actual like good professional wrestler. He can, he doesn't have to do this.
00:38:15
Speaker
And actually, what was his tweet last night? What was the the he said something to the something to the effect of, you know, I'm a guy who could go out there and dance and the crowd would cheer for me. But I go all the way. He said something about like there's a lot of different flavors of wrestling ice cream and I taste like all of them or something. That was a way better way of putting when I was trying to.
00:38:35
Speaker
And I will say like Jojinella and Cyclope's match was probably one of the better death matches I've ever seen because it wasn't just like non-stop
Stunning Moves & Injuries
00:38:43
Speaker
spotfest. Yes, you had some ridiculously brutal things happening, but they were trying to tell a story of besting each other's and the the flaming V trigger that Cyclope put on Jojinella was one of the coolest goddamn things I've ever seen in my life.
00:38:58
Speaker
For our listeners who don't watch New Japan and know what the V-Trigger is, describe what a flaming V-Trigger is. Okay, so the V-Trigger, first off, as they move by Kenny Omega, you might know it from Seth Rollins, it's called the Revolution knee, where, you know, just straight high knee to the face. So in this match, Cyclope's got his tag buddy,
00:39:20
Speaker
Miedo Extremo, who you may remember from earlier, he's out there and right at a penultimate moment of the match, he douses Cyclope's knee pad with lighter fluid and lights it on fire. It was awesome having the scent of lighter fluid fill that like that. I was going to call it an arena, but that would be way too much. Yes. Fill in that death room with the scent of fire and camp. I don't know. That was that was a fucking spot.
00:39:48
Speaker
We all took guesses on when we went in. I said there's no way this place isn't going to smell bad. And it didn't. It didn't. But once he set his knee on fire, it smelled exactly like what I thought it might. Oh, just sulfur and sadness. So Cyclope lights his knee on fire and then proceeds to extinguish it upon Joey Janela's bleeding face.
00:40:12
Speaker
This match was easily like, I don't know if I want to say easily, but because the main event was a fuck, fuck show like it was. I don't even like this match, though, had the gnarliest shit I've ever seen. They had a board like a piece of plywood on the ground and just covered in razor blades. I mean, would you say 20 razor blades, 20 razor blades sunk into a piece of styrofoam so they'd stay there and not, you know, rattle about and cause undue damage, I guess.
00:40:41
Speaker
Oh my God, and this dude, Cyclope took a back bump onto this and you're like, oh, he didn't roll around much. What is landing on 20 razor blades gonna do to your back? Oh, it creates 20 deep gashes that let you see inside Cyclope. I saw his soul through 20 small holes. Just black as night with fat tissue around it.
00:41:07
Speaker
And oh, then, okay, at one point during this match, Cyclope begins to take off Joey Janela's shoes. Keep in mind, I mean, I don't know how many light tubes get broken in an average match for this, but it is fucking gnarly.
00:41:23
Speaker
The ring is a powdery, crystalline substance. Think like underneath that one window and home alone when Marv tries to get in there without any shoots. That's the experience of this ring right now. I think what's great about the light tube thing that you just brought up is that it never felt like even after they finished a match and they swept the ring, you know they didn't get everything. And if I had broke a light tube here in my apartment and told you to roll around on the ground naked, you would say no.
00:41:54
Speaker
there were probably don't put words in my mouth and then you would see them try to get most of it out of the ring and then when a match would start before they even broke out light tubes in that match you would see guys get cut up from the light tubes in the previous match that had been mostly swept up but not all
00:42:13
Speaker
I'll put it this way, this morning I put on my hoodie that I had on at this show last night, and as I slid my arms into the sleeves, I screamed as I felt tiny shards of light tube cut my skin. And that will be the story for the next year. Yeah, the hoodie's done.
00:42:32
Speaker
Okay, but like you were saying Marv, Home Alone, another way you can put it, if you want to turn him into the hero of this match, full John McClane. Like, you know John McClane walking around on that broken glass, Joey Janela is now barefoot in this ring, thumb tacks everywhere. He goes to do, I assume, like a coup de gras, onto Cyclope, Cyclope moves, Joey Janela, barefoot double stomp into the tacks,
00:42:58
Speaker
feet just just silver like he's got on like you know some weird sandals. I mean I just remember like the moment the tax come out after everything we've seen there was this kind of weird huh like now is the time to do the tax spot like you just you just broke like 40 light tubes over each other's faces.
00:43:19
Speaker
Yeah, the second the tax came out, I was kind of like, who gives a shit? Like, okay, just to say, like, we've talked a lot about light tubes. Let's get into some of the other violence objects we saw. We saw, okay, bamboo spikes. It would be like a skewer, like a kebab, like a kebab stick. Just tons of them sticking out of a board. People taking fucking back bumps onto essentially knives, like, you know, just spikes. Yeah.
00:43:44
Speaker
So I think we're kind of moving to the G Raver versus Scotty Vortex match then, if we're talking about skewers and other awful things. So remember we mentioned Gigi Allen? G Raver is Gigi Allen. Oh, reincarnated. Like this guy is every shit covered nightmare I've ever had about Gigi Allen. He comes out and he's wearing the skull of probably one of his deceased enemies. He just...
00:44:14
Speaker
Which is pretty fucking metal. It's pretty. Oh, it's it's super impressive. He's a he's a scary looking man. Scotty Vortex is not a scary looking man. He just looks like a normal ass wrestler. Yeah. Like this guy, his back wasn't even scarred. It looked like he didn't know what he was getting into. I was just like it was a beautiful blank canvas for us to just paint on just to paint just blood and sweat and other guys blood, you know.
00:44:40
Speaker
And Leonardo Deji Raber took it. So right. Right before the match begins, we do notice that they're they're wearing a tack grieves on their kick pads. So I guess this was like a gimmick sort of thing. Match begins. And then at some point, I don't know if you guys saw, but apparently Scotty Vortex breaks his fucking arm like compound fracture style bone out.
00:45:05
Speaker
so the whole match like they had everybody has wrist tape on because obviously you don't want to get your wrist cut by all this shit and we see him like really holding that wrist and like he's really talking to the ref and uh gg allen over in the corner doesn't give a shit and like clearly like i thought he just cut himself yeah we find out fucking just compound fracture just poking out of there little bone
00:45:28
Speaker
That is fucking tough. Yeah, because he wrestled for like another five minutes. No one threw up the X on that one. That gesture does not exist at this show. Okay, speaking. Okay, we were talking about this earlier. Rules. What makes it pro wrestling? Were there rules established? We were talking about like, does ring psychology exist in this? Like, let's...
00:45:50
Speaker
I don't think it's possible for ring psychology to exist in this point. Cuz I mean like, one of your opening moves is a Snapdragon suplex into a pile of light tubes. It's tough to build like, oh, this is the move that's finally gonna put him away now. And that's the opener.
00:46:10
Speaker
Five minutes in, they're gonna sit up a table on the outside of the ring. You're gonna forget about that table, and 20 minutes later, we're gonna get back to it. The most ring psychology you're gonna get with that is they sat down a razor blade board, one guy gets thrown into it, kinda does like a whoa, whoa, whoa, doesn't get slammed into it, then immediately gets slammed into it. Like the ring psychology is, oh, he didn't, yeah, there it is.
00:46:35
Speaker
Rules do exist because during the main event, Nick Gage did get his foot on the rope. Yeah, there was a rope break. That was so odd to me. Yeah, it was to me too. And I noted it. I was just like... When did rules start applying? You asked me, you said, does the ring even matter? And I said, well, you had to pin in it, I think.
00:46:57
Speaker
but only because it was there. Was there anything that happened there that they could not have done with others? Could they have set up- Well, it would have been harder for all of us to see. It elevated them. It was more of a stage than it was a ring. I guess to my point.
00:47:12
Speaker
I'm I'll grant you that it's some form of pro wrestling. I'm just going to say that the rules of pro wrestling didn't matter. There really wasn't any psychology and they could have they could have performed that show without a ring. You might say, well, what about the spots on the turnbuckle? Right. They could have done those off of a ladder. There could have been a pit and they could have done all the same. It's like they go to a fucking Sarlacc pit. I think our experience would have actually been
00:47:39
Speaker
Greatly in like uh, elevated. Is that the word I want for it? There's like a dog fighting pit. We're all like looking down That's what it was basically like it was it was gladiators destroying each other Instead of with swords and shields except there was a riot shield riot police shield covered in light tubes and old blood Yeah, well like what you just said like where you're like, these are gladiators That's what kelsey grammer said at the beginning of wrestlemania 33 goes these modern day gladiators in a modern day coliseum
00:48:08
Speaker
This coliseum was in the back of a flea market and the gladiators were getting paid $15. So it's like the shitty African coliseum at the beginning of the movie, gladiator. I bet you actually the actual coliseum is like way cleaner. At one point Nick Gage looks over at me and I just give him the thumbs down and he cuts off the guy's head.
00:48:38
Speaker
Cause yeah, you know what? We're all kings. We're all kings when we go to pro wrestling, except Joaquin Phoenix didn't get glass in his eyes. I love it. I mean, okay.
00:48:51
Speaker
Obviously, like it isn't nowhere near traditional pro wrestling. It does have its audience. That thing was fucking for sure. Like people came from all over right before the show. Denver. Denver. There's there's divorce guy from Denver. Having the time of his life inside. We were talking with the party bus. There are there are people who came from New Jersey, from Florida for this show, like GCW heart, like Dyer fans.
00:49:15
Speaker
guys wearing like CZW faction shirts were there who actually made the trip like that even dedicated fans here like there was a guy that we were standing in line behind who
00:49:25
Speaker
bought all in with like the west one who brought his kids like bought all in about making weapons like showed us pictures of his sad looking 11 year olds holding these weapons uh which was should have been indicative of the experience we were going to have later when that divorce comes through and there's a child custody battle i bet you those pictures come into play in the courtroom well here's what he was doing when he should have been at johnny's baseball game
00:49:51
Speaker
And actually, here's Johnny in the same video of a man with his knees on fire hitting another man in the face. Speaking of children at this event, they had wiffle ball bats that had bottle caps and thumbtacks glued to them. And I thought those were the cutest weapons there. The most horrific weapon, which we did see on Facebook, we discussed it, and I
00:50:16
Speaker
sought out the man who created this violence machine. It was, it was a bunch of the bamboo skewers, and then five pizza cutters in the middle of it. And he got somebody he claimed that the guy agreed to take a bump on it, which said Marcus crane who was in the main event when the cage was gonna do it when they had it in the ring.
00:50:35
Speaker
it was oh for the main event uh the the death merchants as you call them the roadies the pa's whatever they got a little over zealous with putting shit out and they filled the ring with so many weapons that there wasn't even anywhere to enter it and somebody came i was like what the fuck are you doing there was literally a bed of nails we did see the line with the bed of nails apparently a fan just threw that up there like okay this is not just a bed of nails everybody this is a bed of
00:51:02
Speaker
fucking railroad spikes. I was going to say railroad. Nails is that somebody comes by and like, yeah, we got to 86 the railroad spikes. That's we saw the line. The decency was there. And like, OK, and just to let you know, no security. Somebody got in holding that.
00:51:18
Speaker
yeah somebody carried a bed of railroad spikes in here's what i was thinking and this is this is diving into a whole other level of this they really don't go clearly to the levels to check what fans bring in to be used as weapons how do you know that those fans aren't poisoning like the the tips of the objects are like anybody can do anything to that shit they can put like secret
00:51:41
Speaker
weapons on the weapon that you don't know about? This is an honorable place, man. No, shut up. No. No. OK, well, from the sound of your voice right now. Don't even try to put me into a corner where you act like you don't feel the same way. Nobody puts Nick Gage in a corner. And if they do, he will fuck his way out of it. I do agree with you, Dave. It was interesting to see them have the line of that's too much. Yes. Oh, OK. That's where the line is here. Was not well established.
00:52:11
Speaker
until the main event. But I do think that's also an interesting point that you bring up, like when we're talking about the this pizza cutter monstrosity is like that's an awful lot of trust to put in people who are designing sadistic elements for fun.
Unusual Weapon Encounters
00:52:26
Speaker
Like, oh, and I mean, I approached this man in the parking lot and I was like, hey, I saw that on Facebook and I needed to meet its creator. And he's like, that's me. And I was like, you made this. He's like, yeah, I was just bored and put this together.
00:52:39
Speaker
And if you need to see this fucking monstrosity of a machine, I keep calling it a machine like there's moving parts. The moving parts are the fucking organs. Yeah, I guess the pizza cutters spin. But it's on our Facebook, Instagram, Twitter, all that shit. Find that picture because this thing... Admire it. It is, I mean, Jesus Christ. It didn't get used and I'm not mad about it. No, that's totally fine. When we saw like broken CDRs,
00:53:08
Speaker
That was my favorite weapon. I thought that was creative as fuck. Didn't get used either. I think that got taken away because that's fucked up to the this hack covered coffee machine was kind of adorable. That was fun. Like I like when that was creative. See, that's an arts and crafts project that I'd love to see on Etsy, like violence up normal items. Well, our old coffee machine went put.
00:53:30
Speaker
I got a new use for it. See, that's something Baron Corbin would have in his house. That's a thumbtack covered coffin machine next to the reindeer teeth. But I don't know, like...
00:53:43
Speaker
I'm happy I went because I want to be able to go to all, like any kind of wrestling, experience it at least once. That being said, we all experienced this for the first time last night. Dave, would you return? Like do you see yourself like maybe not like if it was tomorrow? Because obviously like my therapist is going to hear about this for a minute. But like two years down the line, somebody invites you to GCW were there.
00:54:07
Speaker
Uh, two years from now, it's going to have to be a game time decision, but I'll say, yeah, maybe. Um, but I will say like, definitely after this experience, like I was always very gung ho about making the trip for like CCW's tournament. GCW does a tournament of survival to compete with now, like go, like get the full deathmatch tournament experience.
00:54:23
Speaker
I don't think that's in the cards now, I don't think that's necessary. Like it scratched that itch a little bit, like you got it, you got it. I've seen it live, I've seen what it is, I've actually got to smell blood and mercury mixed together, which will haunt me for the rest of my days. No ventilation, that smell. It was musty in there. Maybe if GCW comes back to Chicago in two to ten years, yes.
00:54:47
Speaker
Well, I mean, Nick or Nate Webb did say that was the 10 years, like he said, have been 10 years since he had wrestled in Chicago. Well, I think we have to put this this horrible monster back to sleep. Looks like like in Derry, Maine. I think we're fine now. Like Derry, Maine, like the Bullet Club. We are fine.
00:55:08
Speaker
It's hard for me to say. I would like to tell you that next year in Jersey for Mania Weekend, because they're obviously gonna do another Joey Janellas, which is GCW. Joey Janellas was a much more fun-spirited show. Nick Gage had a match in it with Pentagon, but it wasn't a blood-covered match. It was just a lot of steel chair shots and some table spots and some scary shit, but nothing
00:55:37
Speaker
out of a horror movie. If they decided to put on like a huge deathmatch WrestleMania weekend, like we're hometown, this is the big thing we gotta like...
00:55:46
Speaker
We gotta really show them who we are. That would fuck me up. If this was just a regular show and they're trying to do their version of a WrestleMania, truly don't know if I could handle it. We brought this up last night when we were driving home. I asked you, for people who are listening, we are actually attending a Ring of Honor show here in just a few hours. I think we brought that up earlier. Are you gonna be able to enjoy
00:56:09
Speaker
that form of wrestling the same way less than 24 hours later after what you saw last night. I think I'm gonna enjoy it because like it's a completely different thing like going to Ring of Honor and New Japan is like going to the ballet and this was like going to uh
00:56:27
Speaker
a cock fight. I mean, I don't know how to compare it to dancing. Like I'm trying to think like what this was like going and fuck this felt more like the time me and metal Dave went to a cannibal corpse concert and there were skinheads everywhere. Yeah, except you know, with the skinheads there at least there was like security and you could get away from them here you're just you're locked in this room with a bunch of insane people with glass.
00:56:52
Speaker
I will have to say, the crowd, much more normal than I anticipated. Yeah, that surprised me too. Whatever that means. Whatever normal means for a wrestling show, we were all there, so obviously we're all mentally disturbed. But looking at everybody, I feel like we all had a look on our face like, we're people, we could go to a coffee shop after this. I've eaten a scone before. Everybody there looked like they know what a scone is.
00:57:16
Speaker
And there weren't any like really weird chance it was a standard wrestling crowd fairly. We clapped the appropriate time. Holy shit.
00:57:25
Speaker
You made me realize, every time I go to a wrestling show, there's always a dickhead screaming, kiss him, or something about, no one screamed shit at these guys. This was a very respectful crowd. Yeah, we know why, too. You're always respectful to the man with a knife. So you asked Dave, and you were alluding to it a minute ago, would you go back? Like I said, I would, fuck.
00:57:51
Speaker
More importantly to the people listening to this show, would you recommend somebody go into one of these? I mean, if this is your cup of tea, like if you're a fan of CZW and you get like you really get what you like out of it, GCW does it fucking well. Like if this were something I enjoyed.
00:58:10
Speaker
like I don't it's hard for me to say I didn't enjoy it because we got a lot of laughs out of it I was fucking horrified like when I watch a horror movie I'm not afraid anymore when I watched this I was truly afraid for them I
Reflecting on Attending Alone
00:58:23
Speaker
was afraid for myself I was you know so if I guess what I'm asking is if if GCW was doing a show in Denver and you were trying to get a divorce
00:58:36
Speaker
Would you fly out there? Would you go to a GCW show by yourself and enjoy that without having friends there if you couldn't tell anybody about it? Would I go alone? Would you go alone and you couldn't share the story?
00:58:51
Speaker
That to me is putting you in a corner for whether or not you're having fun. If you can't talk about it with anybody else, and you're there by yourself. See, I do go to a lot of wrestling shows alone, and I always talk to people around me, and this wasn't any different. Like, the people that were there, a lot of people were wrestling fans who saw a poster for a wrestling show and went to go see it. Because also, Joey Janela's becoming a name. A lot of people are hearing about Joey Janela's Spring Break.
00:59:16
Speaker
I enjoyed everybody I talked to. I had fun in the line, like chatting, shooting. Like, any wrestling's fun to talk about. I think, like, if you're faint of heart on this, do not attend. It's fucked up. You're gonna get blood. You could get a disease. I don't know. It's hard for me to say, like, go to this. It's... If you're squeamish, it's not for you. Yeah, like, I'm actually surprised I made it to the end. You tried to run. I tried to run. You didn't let me.
00:59:43
Speaker
I don't know. It's hard for me to fully endorse this, because if I want to run for office someday, this could come and haunt me.
00:59:54
Speaker
I like the idea of you trying to run for office after having this podcast. What about, I mean, I know your answer is like, you're not going to this alone. This is the answer I'll give you. If I wanted to pull a prank on somebody or scare the shit out of somebody from hanging out with me ever again, this is something I would take them to. Oh, you could, because it's far enough outside of Chicago, they're not getting an Uber 40 minutes back to the city. Like you're like, you can go wait out in the parking lot where you sell meth, or you can sit inside with me and watch these guys kill each other.
01:00:24
Speaker
It's a one time thing. I don't like you said you worded it like it's something off the bucket list. I don't know if it was on a bucket list, but it's checked off a list of things. It's an experience that I've had. If I never see it again, I'm not going to be heartbroken because it's not my favorite flavor of wrestling ice cream. Yeah.
01:00:45
Speaker
Lot of toppings. Lot of toppings. I don't know. Where are we at with this? We good? Thanks, Dave. You're welcome. I'm glad we went. I'm glad you guys got to experience that with me.
01:01:00
Speaker
I don't think we need to talk about the the murder. There was a murder. We don't need to talk about it. I did. I want to write quick. Just yeah. Bring up the murder because I know like, you know, we could get arrested for being accomplices and not helping, but this man was scary. So you guys remember that schlack guy that I mentioned earlier? Google him if you want to treat it is a lifetime of poor decisions that has led this man to this point. He's enormous and covered in tattoos like looks like a pro wrestler.
01:01:28
Speaker
Yeah, he's very much pro wrestler. So he's wrestling this guy named Eric Edwards. And the match ends with Schlack putting him in the camel clutch and pulling two plastic bags out of his shorts, which he then proceeds to wrap around Eric Edwards face as the bags filled with blood and murder him. And we cheered for it. Everyone cheered.
01:01:53
Speaker
Did I or was I sucked? I did not cheer. I just want to go on record in case I run for office. I did not cheer for a guy getting suffocated to death in a bag full of blood. And watching somebody have to pick up that bag and they really, like the ring crew, it was really a two finger pick up. Like they wanted as little of skin touching that bag as possible as it led to the trash can.
01:02:17
Speaker
I don't know. Well, thanks for joining us, Dave. I don't know. You want to stick around and talk not this kind of wrestling? Yeah. Let's go ahead and transition topics at this point. We've gone to a grim place. Thanks. Thanks, Metal Dave, for hanging out with us. Check us out on all their social media shit. Predetermined podcast on Instagram. Wrestle hang out on Twitter. Wrestle hang out on Facebook.
01:02:39
Speaker
Rate, review, subscribe. Let us know how much you're mad at us about Necro Butcher. I mean, if this is your flavor of ice cream and you're mad about the way we talked about it, I apologize. You can shit on my ballets all you want. But yeah, thanks everybody for listening. Thanks for hanging out with us. We'll see you next week. Peace. Dave, you want to do the honors this week? I think it's time to hit the goddamn music.