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Author and Activist M Kelly Peach
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This week we get way political as we air our grievances with the rise of fascism in America--and share some ideas for resistance and collective action. Also, separating art from artists, writing as therapy, open carry dildos, and the rerelease of A Stabbing for Sadie. Find more from M Kelly Peach here.
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Transcript
Introduction and Guest Introduction
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You are listening to the Mentally Oddcast, where we talk with creatives about neurodivergence, trauma, addiction, and all the other things that impact and inform our art. Our goal is to show everyone that no matter what you're going through, you are not alone and you can make art about it.
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Music
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You are listening to the Mentally Oddcast. My name is Wednesday, leave Friday, and with me today is M. Kelly Peach, who is the author of The Adventures of Argyle Sock and the Death of Tinsegile's Death.
00:00:49
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He was born in Detroit and raised in the west side suburb of Garden City. He graduated from Lake Superior State College, which is now a university, with the v a BA in English Language and Literature and a secondary teaching cert.
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His work has appeared in 70 plus venues, including Lumina Journal, Metastellar, and Please Do Not Tap on the Glass. We'll have links for all that in the description.
00:01:14
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Hey there, Michael. How are you? I'm doing well. Thank you. Cool. Thanks for being here.
Childhood Influences on Creativity
00:01:21
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um We actually like to start by asking guests to tell us about the first horror movie that they remember seeing.
00:01:28
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So please go ahead. So about a half a mile from my home in Garden City, Michigan, in the early 60s, so I'm aging myself here, there was a movie theater called The Schaefer.
00:01:45
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Later on, it became the La Parisienne, and then it's been closed for a number of years now. Anyways, back in the day, the Saturday matinee was really cheap, like a quarter or 35 cents, something like that.
00:02:01
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so Wow. Wow. Again, I'm dating myself. um Most Saturdays, especially in the summer, my parents would send me and my two older sisters there for the day with two or three bucks, enough for tickets, drinks, and popcorn.
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So we would watch beach blanket movies with Frankie and Annette, or we would hammer films with Vincent Price Um, but the two horror movies that I can remember because I, um, not one sticks to my two, two came to mind immediately when I saw this question.
00:02:45
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Um, and, and they still stick with me to this day are the Tingler. Nice. 13 ghosts, the original. Oh, nice. Nice.
00:02:56
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Yes. And, uh, we're scary. Yeah, well, they I mean, I would say that they both hold up in terms of creepiness. Uh-huh.
00:03:08
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Nice. So would you say that that's that set you on a path?
00:03:14
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No, not necessarily. When you say this path, I assume you mean being a horror writer. Yeah, yeah. Well, or or a writer in general, because I think movies, people that are very into movies often...
00:03:31
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use that as as an inspiration for other arts, not just writing, but, you know, visual arts, sculpture, all that there. Games. Yes, because if they like movies, they like storytelling.
00:03:43
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Yep. Yep. ah So I think horror movies, which I still admire and watch a lot to this day, help me, but I would assign the major motivation to my readings.
00:03:58
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I've been an avid reader. for, um, a long time. Um, also a book collector actually since fifth grade.
00:04:12
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Oh, wow. And I had a teacher named Marshall Rafferty who turned me on to reading. Um, he used to bring in his his own books from his, he had a, uh, an extensive collection.
00:04:28
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Um, he'd bring them into class and share them with us. And I just ate them up.
00:04:34
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Oh, what kind of books?
00:04:37
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So like all genres or. Yeah. He tried to get the students to read in, in different areas.
00:04:50
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um I, I liked adventure. So, okay. he would have me reading Jeffrey Farnall and, um, writer Haggard.
00:05:04
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And then he turned me on to, um, Edgar Rice Burroughs.
00:05:09
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And, and then I got hooked and I read all the Tarzan and all the Mars and the Venus books and the Pellucidar books and, and on and on.
00:05:22
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Uh, I've read pretty much everything that, Edgar Rice Burroughs wrote.
00:05:28
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Wow. Yeah. So in addition to that once, so once I got hooked like that, then I started off on my own and I was definitely attracted to speculative fiction.
00:05:42
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Okay. Including horror. And so I started reading Edgar Allan Poe and HP Lovecraft and Robert Howard, Robert E. Howard.
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Clark Ashton Smith and Machen and on and on. And I think that's what really got me on my path to writing.
Ethical Dilemmas in Supporting Problematic Artists
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Cool. Well, I mean, that leads me into the natural question of, uh, ah separating the art from the artist because you mentioned specifically Poe and Lovecraft which are two writers that as writers I admire very much obviously I think everybody in horror has a favorite Poe story um mine's Casper of Amontillado by the way um but is that something that you think about in terms of the some of the older authors like like Poe and and Lovecraft who were obviously pretty problematic
00:06:43
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Okay, i'm not I'm not sure I'm following your question. Well, Lovecraft was a giant racist and Poe kept falling in love with his underage cousins. And today we live in ah in an atmosphere where ah people often distance themselves from artists who reveal themselves to be flawed in ways that hurt people, like J.K. Rowling or Neil Gaiman, for example.
00:07:08
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Yeah, okay. Now, yeah, I understand what you're saying now. And... Yeah, that is so true. and Edgar Rice Burroughs was a huge racist as well.
00:07:19
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You know, i guess I do separate, um, the, the, um, literature from the artists themselves. Um,
00:07:34
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I have, yeah. that's it's It's certainly easier to do that when the artist is dead. Because I think, I mean, everybody has to find their own lines as far as that goes. Like what you feel is acceptable.
00:07:48
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I know people that excised every bit of Harry Potter literature and merch out of their homes. I didn't go quite that far. um But I certainly don't want to...
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ah enjoy any media in such a way that it gives money to those people, particularly JK Rowling, because she has said outright that I have a lot of money because people support what I support.
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And that to me is just way too gross to like to ever want to put my money towards. But, you know, that's that's just me. Like, people feel different ways about it. So, I mean, i think...
00:08:27
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Orson Scott Card, I don't know if you remember what it was sort of like revealed that Orson Scott Card was a giant homophobe. And it was a drag because who doesn't love Ender's Game? Everybody loves Ender's Game.
00:08:40
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Right. Yeah. No, I'm aware of that. If you need a new copy, you got to buy it used. and You know, and I haven't read the Harry Potter series.
00:08:53
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And I just figured at some point I would. you know, back in day. um But now that I'm aware of her stance on trans folks, I just don't think I'm going to read it.
00:09:09
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Not even used copies. I'm just not going to, yeah, I'm just not going to Well, and the good news is she's such a thief that if you read a few other authors, you have essentially read Harry Potter anyway.
00:09:24
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Okay. People have actually said that about Gaiman as well, that like there are other authors that did what he did sooner and better. So, you know, I'm i'm kind of taking my time getting through all of that.
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yeah Like most people, I feel like just don't have enough time to read everything I want to. Wow.
00:09:48
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But if we can get back into horror, um, I, I think a lot of people have theories on why people that have depression or anxiety or even autistic people are specifically drawn to stuff like horror media and even like true crime.
00:10:06
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Do you have a theory on that?
Mental Health and Media Preferences
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Or do you subscribe to any of the existing theories? Uh, you know, and that's, that's such a good question. Um,
00:10:19
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Perhaps it is that many people with depression have strong imaginations.
00:10:29
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And that leads to the depression. And so they're naturally, and because they have these imaginations, they're naturally drawn to stories. And I feel like horror stories are particular particularly powerful because they deal with fears and they work at such a primal level.
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who yeah would Yeah, that would be my answer to that. Okay. All right. Yeah, that's interesting. So when did you receive your initial diagnosis?
00:11:05
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Okay.
00:11:09
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I was teaching special education SCOTA public schools in Northern Michigan in the fall of 1990. Okay. okay I've gotten my MED in generic special education from North Texas State University.
00:11:24
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It's now university of North Texas. And it's like the third largest school in Texas. Oh, wow. So, uh, I got that in the spring of 1990 and, um, I didn't get my job at a SCOTA until late in the summer.
00:11:44
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I had been looking at different places and and then came up to Michigan to do a series of interviews for special education teachers. Okay.
00:11:56
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And there's such a demand for special ed teachers. There was back then, and there still is to this day. um I basically got job offers from five of the six places that I interviewed at.
00:12:12
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including Oscoda. So that's the one I chose. And so I returned to Michigan and we moved from Texas back to Michigan. And I had to start teaching immediately, like within the next day or two from when I arrived. wow.
00:12:29
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Oh, it was, it was bad. That's jarring. So there was no time for me to prep. Uh, i I didn't even know where my classroom was. I just like walked in and I just was thrown to the walls and I had to start teaching and I could never get caught up.
00:12:49
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I had to scramble all year. I had to, you know, to create lesson plans and tests and quizzes and other activities. And of course it's special ed. So some of the students were very challenging and some of the parents were even more challenging.
00:13:11
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Oh, I'm sure. you You've probably heard this before, but um
00:13:18
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the parents are more problematic than the students. Yes, I have heard that many times before. I know lots of teachers.
00:13:28
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So with all that going on, I ended up depressed. And i lost weight. I lost like 30 or 40 pounds over the course of the school year. But early in the, you know, that fall, when I first started to get depressed, I went to the local community mental health agency for some help.
00:13:47
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And that's where I was first diagnosed with depression. And it was also exacerbated by yeah seasonal affective disorder, a which is what we called it back then. It's,
00:14:01
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they use a different term for it now. Yes. Uh, I was put on, uh, antidepressants and the first two gave me severe diarrhea.
00:14:12
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It was bad. it was so bad. I couldn't work. Oh my gosh. So the third one they tried was Prozac and that one worked very well for me.
00:14:25
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Uh, we were quickly able to find the right dose and It was life changing for me. Cool. it well It was just, it was amazing.
00:14:38
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um And I've been on Prozac ever since.
00:14:44
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Wow. So you went all through childhood and your teen years without a diagnosis. And then it sounds like when you finally got a diagnosis, it was accurate.
00:14:55
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And it only took a few tries to find a medication that worked for you. Correct. Correct. That is incredible. That's an incredible
Personal Mental Health Journey and Challenges
00:15:04
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experience. It is far and away not what I often hear when when we deep dive into people's experience getting diagnosed.
00:15:13
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That's awesome. And you said that was through community mental health. Yes. Yeah, that's great. My experience at community mental health was was not that. um Wow.
00:15:25
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I've talked about it on the show. I won't go over it again. But yeah, its it can vary a lot depending on... and Well, because, you know, organizations are made of people and people are all different.
00:15:38
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So... um so What, uh, have, have you needed any other kinds of, of support or accommodations except for your medication?
00:15:51
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Well, let me talk a little bit more about what my experience was with the, with the depression. please And then I'll get into the, um, CMH, uh, some more CMH stuff.
00:16:06
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Okay. Uh, So the psychiatrist really emphasized when I started taking the Prozac that I ah could not drink alcohol as it would interfere with the efficacy of the meds.
00:16:22
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Yep. I quit drinking on September 30th, 1990. So had you been drinking regularly up to that point? Well, yes, I'm an alcoholic.
00:16:34
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Ah, and and, and do you, do you think that that is like from self-medicating from the untreated depression? You know, possibly,
00:16:45
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ah
00:16:48
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but I just, I really like to drink and I just like to, so I, I don't know. It's probably a combination of both. Um, okay.
00:17:00
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So, so I quit drinking then. And, um, during the school year, Wortsmith Air Force base, which are you familiar with that?
00:17:12
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With that force base? The only air force base I have ever been to is Selfridge. Yeah. Okay. So Wortsmith is in Oscoda and the closure of that base was announced during the school year and they provide 50% of the student population or they did.
00:17:32
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Oh, wow. So I knew I was going to be laid off because I was second to last in seniority. Oh, dang. So I had to find a new job. So that summer I was looking again.
00:17:45
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And I got off my meds because I was no longer stressed from teaching. And I did okay during the summer. I ended up teaching at Hanaville Indian School near Escanaba, Michigan.
00:18:01
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And this okay this was a self-contained classroom for emotionally impaired junior high students.
00:18:10
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And they were the worst of the worst. um They were so glad, the teachers were so glad that I came on board because all their problem students were gonna go into my self-contained classroom.
00:18:23
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They were just overjoyed. wow And honestly, I just, I could not deal with it. I could not do it. I tried, um, and I got really depressed even worse than at Oscoda.
00:18:41
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So then I went to the local community health agency up here in Delta County. Now this is where, uh, this is where it gets bad.
00:18:54
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This is more, i think, in line with some of the experiences you or your guests have had with CMHs.
00:19:01
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Because it was bad. The case manager for the CMH here decided that it would be a good approach to delay getting me back on antidepressants.
00:19:14
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Yeah, yeah. Instead, he wanted to try talk therapy. And that was ineffective. Because he was not a good, the case manager is really a therapist type person as well.
00:19:27
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And he was not he was not good at talk Well, that just seems really irresponsible, though, to say, oh, you don't need meds when you know in the past that meds had been effective.
00:19:39
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I mean, that just seems like a no-brainer. I know, I know. I told him that, and he just he kept putting it off, and it just got worse and worse. ah By the time I did get back on my meds, it was too late.
00:19:58
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I just couldn't do the job, and I ended up, getting fired from that job. Oh, no. oh yeah. And that really, i never became a regular classroom teacher again after that.
00:20:12
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You know, when you can't finish your teaching contract, your teaching career is usually pretty much over. What a shame. And that, I mean... It's such a huge problem in America because so few people have access to appropriate physical health care, let alone mental health care.
00:20:33
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And as you just pointed out, that can really mess up your life. You know, because if you need medication and you go to the appropriate doctor and the appropriate doctor decides that you don't need it, like we all want to think, yes, doctors know what they're doing. But a lot of it, particularly in mental health, is guesswork.
00:20:55
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He very well might have thought that he was helping you by having you take less medication. But the hubris of that, when you see someone suffering and say, well, I could help you, but what if we went another way?
00:21:09
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is It's just so appalling, especially when we can see the real world impact of that. Somebody who is good at working together. with some of the most difficult children and was not able to continue doing it because you weren't able to get the mental health care that you needed.
00:21:27
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That is appalling and infuriating. And I really want to thank you for sharing it because that's something that people really need to know about. People need to know that that's happening and that teachers are getting just burnt out because they don't have the support that they need.
00:21:43
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Yes. Yes, that's so true. Yep. And I'm one of those burnout statistics.
00:21:50
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What a shame. What a terrible shame. i mean, did you have any kind of support system when you were going through this? Like were other teachers supportive?
00:22:00
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No, because I was brand new to the school. They barely knew me. um I did not last long. It was just a matter of weeks.
00:22:11
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And I was out of the classroom too too depressed to do anything. Damn. And it sucks too, because if that had happened at a place maybe where you knew people, because when you're new and you're dealing with mental health things, you just seem flaky.
00:22:27
Speaker
And that's just one of those ableist, anti-mental health attitudes that just messes with us wherever we go. But it seems like in education, you might be more likely to find more people with the the kind of, and you know, like informed people that understand that like, oh, you're not a flake, you're dealing with mental health issues. Maybe these things would be helpful.
00:22:52
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But yeah, when you're dropped into a new situation and you already feel disoriented by it, and then you don't get support from your colleagues. I mean, what a fucking drag, man.
00:23:04
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i Yikes. um and it And you know, my administration was not supportive. I can tell you a quick story. Kind of an idea of the The principal came into my classroom ah one time and and yelled at me and the students to stop that goddamn swearing.
00:23:28
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yeah
00:23:32
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oh they'll tell you something about the principal. Well, my God, chastising a teacher in front of students, that's, I don't even have the words.
00:23:44
Speaker
um so So we were going to talk a little about seasonal depression. um And I think it's called that because it tends to, a lot of people feel like sunlight relieves people of depression. i don't i don't like getting sun on me.
00:24:00
Speaker
um but good people believe that and i have actually a sun lamp because i do find it helpful so so maybe me not believing something doesn't necessarily make it untrue i don't know um what was your experience with uh seasonal depression so one of the things that they suggested um the folks at the cmh was that it might be helpful if I had a light box.
00:24:33
Speaker
um And, and I've always been keenly aware ah the days getting shorter. Mm hmm. yeah Okay, which they of course they are now.
00:24:44
Speaker
And, and then after the winter solstice, I'm i'm so grateful that the days are getting longer. and And I'm much more aware of it than than the average person. Because I'll comment on it. And then you know, no one else I'm I know really ever comments on that.
00:25:00
Speaker
But to me it's Pagans do. you hang out with a lot of outspoken Pagans, they can't shut up about how in tune with nature they are. Oh, okay. And that's one of the things. You know, the the lengthening and then the shortening. because yeah I tend to look at it the other way. I'm like, oh, these nights, they get long. Oh, no, they're taking my nights away.
00:25:20
Speaker
but But, you know, that's a me thing. So in Escanaba, I did end up building myself a light box with three full spectrum light tubes. and Nice.
00:25:32
Speaker
I would sit in front of it every day initially when I was trying to overcome my depression. And and I do feel like it helped. um And I continued using it for for some years off and on.
00:25:48
Speaker
But I haven't used it in a long time. The Prozac seems to to work fine for me.
00:25:58
Speaker
Okay. Now, I think one of the things that used to sort of foil me with like wintertime depression is that you can see it coming.
00:26:11
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And sometimes just like the dread of like, oh, God, it's almost that time of year. When's it going to hit? When is everything going to suddenly not matter? is that Is that something you experience as well, that you see it coming?
00:26:26
Speaker
I do see it coming. And there is a degree of dread there. It's not so bad as as it used to be. But yeah, I know exactly what you're referring to. And yeah. So what what do you do? How do you how do you cope with that?
00:26:44
Speaker
ah Well, I just yeah try to keep busy. I try to get outdoors in the fall and in the winter, especially if it's a nice day.
00:26:58
Speaker
You know, when it's overcast, it's still good to be outdoors. But yeah. It's really nice when you get some blue skies. Um, so yeah, that, that's what I do.
00:27:10
Speaker
Okay. And do you have a support structure around you? Like people that are aware of what you're going through that can maybe help you see, because I'm a huge, uh, rely on my social circle and my husband to like, let me know if they notice something that I'm not noticing.
00:27:29
Speaker
Do you, do you have anyone like that? Yeah, absolutely. One's Dave. My wife, Monica, is is my biggest support. She's my rock. And it just so happens that she has an MSW and oh wow is a mental health therapist. She has her own business.
00:27:48
Speaker
Oh, damn. That's convenient.
00:27:53
Speaker
It's called Peach Blossom Therapy up to here in Escanaba. And I'm a little biased, but I think she's really, really good. Cool. she's cool She's very aware um
00:28:07
Speaker
of my situation and she will she will approach me. shell If I'm really getting down, she'll know right away and she'll we'll talk about it. And yeah, she'll make sure that.
00:28:24
Speaker
And there have been a couple of times when I've had to go to the doctor and maybe up my Prozac temporarily to get me through a rough patch.
00:28:37
Speaker
But that's couple of times.
00:28:42
Speaker
I see. So how has your depression impacted your writing process? and And does that show up in your work?
Impact of Mental Health on Writing and Creativity
00:28:52
Speaker
Do any of your characters live with depression?
00:28:55
Speaker
oh
00:28:57
Speaker
Definitely Kyle in the main character in the Death of Tinegal's Death He's depressed because he's trying to deal with the death of his wife. Well, actually, she's not dead.
00:29:11
Speaker
She's in a coma. Uh-oh, spoiler. This is definitely a spoiler alert.
00:29:18
Speaker
She's in a coma, and he's got to decide about pulling the plug. So that's what he's dealing with. But as far as my writing, if if I'm really depressed, I won't get much writing Um, but the pros that keeps me well enough balanced that i can usually keep writing.
00:29:42
Speaker
And what I found is if, if I force myself to write, if I, if I don't feel like writing, but I get in there and I start plugging away at it, um, it may be a struggle at first, but then I get into it and then the words start flying and, and then it goes, well,
00:30:04
Speaker
And then by the by noon, because I usually write in the morning and then stop at noon, you know, I feel much better. So it really helps me to write.
00:30:19
Speaker
That's really interesting. i I talk to a lot of writers about their process, and a lot of people tell me that they get up and write first thing in the morning. That's what Stephen King does. Mm-hmm.
00:30:32
Speaker
And I wonder if part of that, like I smoke pot all day, so I'm my my most productive when I first wake up because I'm not high yet. um But,
00:30:46
Speaker
oh, I lost my train of thought. How ironic. No, but um I think if you're depressed and you actually push through it, that's going to give you a big sense of accomplishment for the day. Because not only have you conquered a bout of depression already first thing in the morning, but you've done something substantial with your day.
00:31:07
Speaker
Something ah concrete that you can point to and say, that's how many words I wrote today. And even if it's, you know, 300 good words, that's still more than there was before.
00:31:18
Speaker
Exactly. yeah
00:31:22
Speaker
so if you write a character that has depression is that something that you are doing intentionally like with a theme in mind or is that just something that happens it's more like just something that happens it's it's um
00:31:45
Speaker
you know, as I conceive of the character, that to me was one of the characteristics of this, of this person. And okay I had to write about that.
00:32:00
Speaker
I see. So ah you were mentioning, um, to me earlier that your recovery from addiction was, uh, it's kind of a non-traditional path.
00:32:11
Speaker
Um, Now, I was guessing based on my own experience that it was a dual diagnosis program. um I was in one of those. I never really got on board with the sobriety part of it.
00:32:23
Speaker
um But, you know, that's that's a whole complicated issue for me. Is that is that what you were doing? Did you have any dual diagnosis work?
00:32:32
Speaker
No, I I was able to get sober and stay sober. um through, and I'm okay with self-disclosing here, um, through a 12 step program, but the um unusual or non-traditional approach to this is that I used Alana as a, NA or AA.
00:33:03
Speaker
I mean, I've, I've been to both of those types of meetings and they didn't work very well for me. um because especially in AA, you get these old timers who have been around for many, many years and they, they tend to be real hard asses.
00:33:25
Speaker
That's not an approach that's going to work well for me. Sure. Whereas if you go into Al-Anon it's always in my experience, it's almost always primarily women and women.
00:33:42
Speaker
They're frankly a kinder, gentler, more understanding group. and Yeah, I think the the so-called tough love is is huge in the addict community. And i think in a lot of cases, it just sort of translates to get your shit right or get the fuck out of here. Like it's it's it's a very combative thing.
00:34:07
Speaker
ah environment which you're right is not conducive to people especially depressed people you know because if you're sitting there thinking well why does it matter why should I bother and the response that you get is hostility or infantilization or maybe you just need Jesus that's not going to be as helpful as as compassionate empathetic care for people and i think I think what you're describing is also kind of Like, community, but I'm loathe to draw this this parallel, but like like the VFW, like it's a bunch of very bitter old men wondering what they think it's naivete that other people aren't as as bitter and angry as they are, is is kind of the vibe.
00:34:57
Speaker
fuck And and i'm I'm sure there's something to be said for that.
Political Climate and Its Effects on Mental Health
00:35:02
Speaker
Like if I was a World War II veteran, well, maybe not World War II because they got treated pretty well. But like a Vietnam veteran, for example, coming back and getting treated. back I mean, veterans in general have so much reason to be angry because they probably went to war for a stupid reason and unless they were actually fighting Nazis.
00:35:21
Speaker
But even then, i mean, how pissed would you be if you got hurt fighting Nazis and now you have to live through this? Yeah, yeah. but But I don't want to I don't want a political tangent too soon because we are going to get into some of that. yeah But it it just it all ties together, though, because I think if I was trying to bring fascism to a place, I would not want there were to be easily available mental health care.
00:35:48
Speaker
I would want people to be frightened and and upset and depressed and angry. And that's something that that fascists are just so great at, is just making us angry.
00:36:00
Speaker
Yes. Yes. and And keeping us divided and all that. Yeah, for sure. Okay. So I guess my next question then about recovery would be, is that finding its way into your fiction as well?
00:36:17
Speaker
You know... what that's interesting because, um, I can't really think of, uh, any my characters, uh, that are in recovery.
00:36:28
Speaker
I have several that are active alcoholics, um, and, and pretty bad ones, but I can't really think of any that are, are in recovery.
00:36:42
Speaker
Uh, what I gotta believe sooner or later, I'm going to, ah In one of my works, I'm going to get someone in there who is in recovery. Well, I mean, there's an argument to be made that we tend to write about the things that we're still working through.
00:36:58
Speaker
And it seems like there probably are, I think for for a lot of people, more residual feelings about the time you spent as an addict than the time you spent in recovery. Because when we dwell on things, we don't dwell on things that we're proud of.
00:37:13
Speaker
You know, nobody's up at three in the morning being like, yeah, that was awesome when I won that thing in third grade. But if you say something stupid at a party, it might haunt you for years. You know, we we tend to obsess about the things that we that we didn't get right the first time.
00:37:30
Speaker
So that's that's my guess for why you write more addicts than recovered people. And I think also that messed up people are far more dramatically interesting than you know, like normal neurotypical people, whatever that turns out to be. Yeah. Yeah. i think you're right. um
00:37:52
Speaker
So do you feel like your creativity, I mean, we, we talked about this a little bit, but does that, does the creativity itself, the, the actual act of writing, does that lessen your depression or is it more about the accomplishment of it?
00:38:13
Speaker
For the most part, it lessens my depression because I do get that feeling of accomplishment, especially when the words are flowing and the ideas are flowing and it's going really well.
00:38:27
Speaker
It's just such a great feeling. um it's It's better than any high that I ever experienced when it's going really well.
00:38:39
Speaker
Cool. i so I suppose...
00:38:46
Speaker
you know Even when it's going bad, it's still pretty good. i can tell you one thing that's that is a real downer and and can get me in a bad mood or feeling low is the rejections that I get from my students.
00:39:08
Speaker
It used to be pretty bad. I got, I got real serious about submitting my stuff. I'd been writing for you decades. Um, and then 14 years ago, my two daughters, my two youngest daughters, um, challenged me to really get my stuff out there.
00:39:34
Speaker
Um, and they, the, the challenge was to do 100 submissions. Oh, wow. And if I did lucky, if nothing happened with them, then they wouldn't say anything anymore.
00:39:51
Speaker
You know, they, they would just let it go because they had been pestering me about, you know, you've got to get your stuff out there. Okay. All right. Uh, so, so I took up that challenge.
00:40:07
Speaker
And, um, it took about six months and I don't know how many submissions, 15, 20, 25, whatever it was. And I, I finally got an acceptance.
00:40:21
Speaker
know Nice. From where? It was from, uh, um,
00:40:27
Speaker
a website called punch Nels and they are now defunct. Um, but they paid a token amount, five or 10 bucks.
00:40:42
Speaker
And I remember when I got the acceptance email, I, so I stood, I sat at my computer and I just, I wept, I wept tears of joy because I didn't know if I would, if I would ever get accepted, you know?
00:40:58
Speaker
Uh, well, it's so, it's so validating, especially that first one. My goodness. Yeah. Um, and so And so then I just carried on since then because you know I had gotten an acceptance.
00:41:14
Speaker
Yep. Then the momentum builds.
00:41:20
Speaker
Well, that's awesome. And I love hearing that it was your children that pushed you into that. Yeah. Yeah. It's kind of cool. Well, our loved ones often see us more clearly than we see ourselves.
00:41:31
Speaker
So knowing that they saw the the talent and the passion in you and encouraged you to pursue it is, I mean, that's just so great. Now, took a look at one of your stories and it had some sculpting in it, which I love because sculpting is one of those things.
00:41:46
Speaker
um You know how when you find out that somebody does something, you have to immediately like think about whether or not you've ever done that thing or whether or not you wanted to. Like when you tell people you're a writer, and they're like, oh, so yeah, I've always wanted to do that.
00:41:59
Speaker
Like, well, obviously not, or you'd have freaking done it. and so ah so That's so true. I've had that many times because you're right. People say, oh, i want I've got a great idea for a novel, you know, but they never write it. Or or the the quintessential, I'll tell you my idea, and you can make it a book, and we'll split the money. yeah Like, really?
00:42:22
Speaker
going to spend 18 months drafting and revising, and you're going to take half the money because you told me about a dream you had? and No, no. And you're standing between me and the dips. Let's stop it.
00:42:34
Speaker
Party talk. oh but But it made me think, actually, the sculpting. um Do you have other creative pursuits besides writing? Because it it seemed like you you knew a few things about sculpting and the tools and such.
00:42:53
Speaker
That's because I do a lot of research. I've done no sculpting. Oh, okay. Okay. one of One of my favorite things about writing, and I tell this to everyone, is it gives me the opportunity to do research into things that I'm interested in.
00:43:12
Speaker
So I'll i'll read 12, 15 books for a story. You know, not even novel, but a story. um
00:43:22
Speaker
So, yeah, so that stuff I'm on sculpting, that's, yeah, that's just all research that I did. That's awesome. but I was fooled. I was totally taken in. What I do is sketching.
00:43:39
Speaker
And ever since I i was a kid, i would sketch things. And then for the longest time, I got away from it. And then I did a little bit with my son because he's an artist.
00:43:54
Speaker
And also, by the way, he's a filmmaker. Yeah. who writes and produces and directs and acts. And his favorite genre is horror.
00:44:06
Speaker
Nice. Yeah. ah But anyways, back to the sketching. um for the For the past, I don't know, year, year and a half, I've been toying with this idea of getting back into sketching.
00:44:23
Speaker
um And what I'm really fascinated with is um on my social media, I get these pictures of bristlecone pines.
00:44:38
Speaker
Are you familiar with them? No. Oh, they're fantastic. um these They're very old. they They live for a long, long time.
00:44:49
Speaker
And they get twisted into these fantastic shapes. Oh, neat. Yeah, they and they just look fascinating. And I And the first time I saw one, I said, oh, that would be really cool to sketch that because they're not like any and tree any other tree I've ever seen.
00:45:08
Speaker
So now I actually have saved, oh gosh, probably a half a dozen, maybe even a dozen pictures of various bristlecone pines. I believe they grow higher up in in altitude on mountains.
00:45:27
Speaker
Oh, wow. Okay. Yeah, because that's that seems to be where all the pictures are, some mountainous landscape.
00:45:36
Speaker
So so maybe maybe I'll ask Santa Claus for a sketch pad and and you yeah and some tarcoals. yeah Nice.
00:45:49
Speaker
Wow, I hope that works out for you. cause yeah i mean i'm I'm of the belief that people should try any type of of art that appeals to them. And and it's tough too, because sometimes, as you just ah pointed out, can be pretty expensive, you know, a nice art pad with, with good paper, especially like if you're, you want to paint, so you need canvas or you need vellum, even vellum is, ah is kind of stupidly expensive sometimes.
00:46:17
Speaker
So, so yeah, I think We get around to fixing a lot of other people problems in the world. I think it'd be it'd be good if ah people had more affordable access to more things that you need to make art.
00:46:32
Speaker
um but But, you know, found art is also a thing. People say, oh, well, you can make art out of garbage. Okay, well, let's let's see if we can do better than garbage. i Right.
00:46:43
Speaker
So you um you actually are a youper, is that correct? You're up in the UP? Yes. i I would love to consider myself a Youper. I've spent many years of my ah adult life ah living in the UP. I was born in Detroit and raised in Garden City.
00:47:03
Speaker
And I tell folks that um that was a mistake. My parents never got the memo that I was supposed to be born and raised in the UP. But I really do like living in the in the u Yeah, i do I do consider myself U-Ber. Well, Taquamon and Falls is just so pretty. I can't get over that place.
00:47:25
Speaker
Yeah. You've got the the Bear Ranch up there, Oswald. I mean, it's a great place. But I think sociopolitically, i don't think I would fit in as well in the U-P as, say, where I am. Because I'm in Ann Arbor, which is stupidly expensive.
00:47:42
Speaker
But it's it's pretty progressive a lot around here. How are things going up there?
00:47:48
Speaker
Well, um
00:47:52
Speaker
so in a sociopolitical sense, not well. It's it tough up here. This, generally speaking, is a deep red area.
00:48:07
Speaker
We have a couple of universities, several universities up here. And those college towns, you know, they tend to be more liberal, more progressive. But other than that, it's it's very conservative.
00:48:25
Speaker
Now, I hear a lot of talk about MAGA people kind of pulling back from Trump slowly figuring out that like, he's not really going after the violent immigrants.
00:48:37
Speaker
ah We aren't saving money on things. There's no tax on overtime thing. Wasn't real. Grocery price is still high. And then the Epstein files. um So are are you seeing that? Are you seeing MAGA people pulling back, taking down their flags, stuff like that?
00:48:55
Speaker
Yeah, I am. um And I can tell you that there's a lot, there's a significantly fewer Trump signs, Trump flags, Trump paraphernalia being displayed up in my area.
00:49:18
Speaker
So I feel like we're seeing some of that. And what happened with me is on January 20th, I became an activist.
00:49:30
Speaker
Yeah, a lot of people did. It's very weird for me because I am i am definitely an introvert.
00:49:42
Speaker
And like, are you familiar with the Myers-Briggs? Yes. Okay. So many years ago, I took the original Myers-Briggs. I maxed out the introversion scale.
00:49:56
Speaker
yeah Yeah, I'm an INTJ myself, so I get it. Okay. Okay. And then I took the revised some years later. Yeah, max that one out too. if you think know But I could not um just sit back and watch what was happening in our country.
00:50:17
Speaker
You know, I've got children, I've got grandchildren. um i just couldn't sit on the sidelines and watch it happen. I had to do something.
00:50:28
Speaker
I had to get out of my comfort zone. So I i became an activist. And, um, I'm now part of, uh, indivisible. don't know if you're familiar with them.
00:50:39
Speaker
oh It's a nationwide resistance group and they've got, gosh, it's, it was last time I checked, it was like 1700 groups nationwide.
00:50:54
Speaker
Uh, so it's probably more now because that was a while ago. Um, so we've got one, we've got several. in the up and the one here in delta county where i live is called um delta county unified okay um so i'm the secretary for that group okay i'm on the board um and i'm at events all the time and um out there with my signs and
00:51:29
Speaker
I'm just okay doing these. So in addition to like physical protest with signs, like what else are you doing? Is there a letter writing? Phone call trees, that sort of thing? Uh, not, not on my part.
00:51:44
Speaker
Um, some, some other folks are doing those sorts of activities. Yeah. Okay. So I only want you to be as specific as you feel comfortable being, uh,
00:51:59
Speaker
I mean, fascism is rising in America and and what I want to get at is how what's happening is impacting regular people individually. So how is your life being impacted by the the rise of fascism or is there anything that they're planning to do that you think will impact you personally?
00:52:24
Speaker
Well, Yes, I'm seeing some personal impacts in my in my life. ah My wife is Mexican-American.
00:52:38
Speaker
And she is terrified that she is going to be deported, even though she was born here.
00:52:49
Speaker
Yeah, they don't they don't care whether or not you... Actually, there are MAGA boys that have come out and said you know, the the legal immigration is causing problems too. We shouldn't be doing it.
00:53:00
Speaker
Kind of going back on the whole like, oh no, we only want criminals. Like, really? you're You're at a junior high school sporting event because you only want hardened criminals and gang members? Come on now.
00:53:12
Speaker
Right, right. So she she carries around her a passport. with her. Oh, geez. That's so sad that people have to do that. Yeah.
00:53:23
Speaker
Well, she feels like she has to. Well, that's, I mean, due process is optional now. So I would agree that she is, ah you know, that, that seems correct to me that the that's the the safest, smartest thing to do.
00:53:39
Speaker
If that even works, because we know that there are some ice guys that just tell me, Oh, that looks like a fake document to me. like you know they're in a position to judge there's some kind of document authenticator and and the trump administration and is working hard at getting rid of birthright citizenship e e so far they're being stopped in the courts thank god but i don't think they're gonna give it up which is crazy because only one of his kids was born to two citizens
00:54:12
Speaker
You know, the the middle one, because the first three, um Ivana didn't become a citizen until after the youngest one was born. And then Melania wasn't a citizen. She was here at an Einstein visa when she gave birth.
00:54:26
Speaker
So I don't. Yes, let's all laugh at Einstein visa. you That's a really good point. Yeah. ah Funny how the rules don't seem to apply to them, right? Well, but for fuck's sake, I mean, both J.D. Vance and the Thomases, Clarence and Ginny, have come out against interracial marriage.
00:54:50
Speaker
And they're both in what J.D. Vance calls a two-color marriage. Like, fine for me, but not for thee. yeah. yeah Well, I'm a white chick and I'm married to a black guy. So I've got a very come at me bro attitude about that whole thing.
00:55:11
Speaker
ah huh um Because, i mean, when I was a kid, people don't seem to remember how different Republicans used to be in the 70s.
00:55:22
Speaker
Like, I remember being a little kid and hearing men get super angry at Jimmy Carter and telling him that Christianity had no place in our government. Because he said, if we're going to be a Christian nation, we need to feed the poor.
00:55:35
Speaker
And they were like, oh, how dare you bring Christianity into politics? And where are those dudes now? because Because we need them. look
00:55:47
Speaker
And I mean, i know I know a lot of that started with ah with Reagan. Because I pretty much blame Reagan and Nixon for most of what happened before Trump got here. Yeah.
00:55:59
Speaker
Because, you know, Nixon is healthcare. Nixon is the guy that said, let's make it legal to profit from healthcare because he was getting a lot of money from Kaiser Permanente. And then Reagan decided to convince everybody that welfare moms are having a sweet time, get getting a big ride, living off that government money.
00:56:20
Speaker
And honestly, you know what I miss is is government cheese. I wish they still had that because we had that as kids and it was delicious.
00:56:31
Speaker
But I'm getting a little off point. I did not know that about Nixon. Yeah. Yeah, that was him. Huh. That's so interesting.
00:56:43
Speaker
I'm old enough. I can remember when Republicans were actually, you know, decent, well-meaning folks. Right, people with whom I disagreed on a lot of issues. But that, I mean, the party of smaller government, remember that?
00:57:00
Speaker
The government, that the the Republicans thought that the government should make as few rules governing your day-to-day life as possible. And that those rules should always have to do with safety and security.
00:57:13
Speaker
hu You know? And like, really? Because in Texas, there are laws against how many dildos people are allowed to own. I don't know if you saw there was a ah protest about that where people were open carrying their dildos because you could have as many guns as you want and drape yourself in them like jewelry.
00:57:34
Speaker
But heaven for friend, anybody have a vibrating silicone Wang. That's just too offensive.
00:57:43
Speaker
Oh, they're losing their minds in Texas. Yeah, they are. Yeah. I have a friend in Texas and he had to send his kids out of state to live with their mother. because one of them is trans and he can be arrested for taking a kid to a proper doctor who will give them the correct medical. I mean, people say, oh being trans is a mental illness or whatever. And it's like, okay, it's neurodivergent because it's not typical. It's not what most people go through.
00:58:15
Speaker
But the DSM-5 says that the correct treatment for a trans person is gender affirming care. So it's another situation where a bunch of politicians are pretending that they know as much as doctors and all of their opinions seem to be fueled by like hate and various phobias and yeah, sorry, tangenting, tangenting.
00:58:40
Speaker
um But it but it it does sound like the rise of American fascism is impacting your family and and causing people that you live with and love to have to change their behavior.
00:58:53
Speaker
my The daughter that lives here in Escanaba is very stressed out. And part of it is because she's a teacher too. ah um wow Yeah. um She's been teaching seven years. She says she's got seven ulcers for each year of teaching.
00:59:12
Speaker
ah But she's also, so I know she's, and she's said this as well, she's stressed out about the politics. She's very stressed out about that.
00:59:23
Speaker
And it's causing her to lose weight enough that we had to take her to the doctor, you know, and you know now yet, you know, what's going on here because she's not, um, you know, diving and trying to lose weight. She just keeps losing weight.
00:59:40
Speaker
And so we gotta, we gotta check that out, but it has to do with the politics.
00:59:48
Speaker
Well, and teachers, I mean, part of fascism is is the propaganda and the control of what people are allowed to think and say. And so much of that starts with education, like this bullshit about putting the Ten Commandments in every classroom.
01:00:04
Speaker
you know and i like to think that if i were teaching i would malicious compliance the hell out of that and just be like okay this says here not to commit adultery who can you think of that's committed adultery oh wait the president a lot so i mean just just to expose the hypocrisy of it all um Because the thing about kids is kids get mad at hypocrisy. Not just autistic kids, but like most kids.
01:00:36
Speaker
Because kids, you tell them about all the rules that they got to follow and some of them seem stupid and they get punished if they don't follow them. So I think when kids find out that adults are making bullshitty rules that they themselves don't follow, yeah that inspires them into action.
01:00:54
Speaker
So... I mean, i hate to put it all on teachers because we put so much on teachers, but for goodness sake, please keep teaching critical thinking.
01:01:05
Speaker
Please keep teaching kids how to receive information critically and determine who is telling you that and why. Because it's such a huge problem now. I mean, people still say to me on the internet, well, how can President Trump just want money? He gives up his salary. It's like, i I don't even know where to begin.
01:01:26
Speaker
You know, oh so so the guy that's already spent like 300 years of presidential salary playing golf. um I don't, but I mean, there are people that think Elon Musk wants to help people that like, that's his main thing is he wants to help people.
01:01:42
Speaker
And I don't, I don't really understand how people arrive at some of their conclusions. It is baffling, isn't it? It is. It is. Like, well, like Elon, for example. I'm sure that Elon wants to be seen as the kind of person who helps people.
01:02:00
Speaker
But if he wanted to help people, he wouldn't have done the whole too slow thing with the ending world hunger. I mean, he said, if somebody shows me the numbers to end world hunger, i will give the money to end world hunger.
01:02:14
Speaker
If it's under, like, I think it was $3 billion or something. And so all these groups got together and gave him the numbers. And he was like, yeah, whatever. I'm not doing it. So...
01:02:26
Speaker
Like, all right, how is he not universally reviled? I mean, yeah, I think flamethrowers are neat too, but come on. Come on. We're not really just going to forgive that as a society because he made a flamethrower as a troll.
01:02:41
Speaker
Come on. You know, I... please go ahead. I was going to say, I got off of Twitter or X. Mm-hmm.
01:02:54
Speaker
um when he When he did the Nazi salute, and no one will ever convince me that it was anything other than a Nazi salute, and then he turned around and, and yeah like, the very next day, I got off of Twitter, and I'd been thinking about it um for a while, but um as a writer, that' that's an important social media because there's still a lot of agents publishers and other writers and magazines, journals, you know, they're all on Twitter. So, but I just, I, at that point, I just said, okay, I cannot stay on on Twitter and, you know, support this guy.
01:03:42
Speaker
Yeah. Well, and and that's that whole thing about finding your lines. You know, I know a lot of people that shut down their Twitter Mine's still up. I haven't actually taken it down.
01:03:53
Speaker
I maybe check in like once a week to see if anything is going on that I need to know about. And usually there's not. And if I'm going to post something there, it's like, well, if you're not a fucking fascist, maybe you'd like to know this thing I'm selling.
01:04:07
Speaker
But ah yeah, I don't, I don't spend time there the way that I do on other platforms. But the thing is, You know, it's it's like computers or or delivery shopping. Like most of the companies that do that thing are evil.
01:04:22
Speaker
Where I live, there's no decent company who hasn't given money to Trump where I can get cable or Internet access. You know, it's between Comcast and AT&T where I am. And they're both fascists.
01:04:35
Speaker
They're fascist companies that give money to the fasc. But I can't just not have the internet in my home. That's not really an option for me because I work from home and I'm a human being who uses the internet.
01:04:49
Speaker
So that's the trap that you get into. Like I used to be so anti Walmart and I would seriously judge my friends if they have like if they own homes and cars and have like real grown up money and they're still shopping at Walmart, I would judge them.
01:05:06
Speaker
Like, no, you should drive to a real store that pays living wages and doesn't put out donation bins for their own employees. And, you know, I was super, super judgy about it.
01:05:17
Speaker
Fast forward 10 years, Amazon is just as bad, you know, and I shop at Amazon because I'm disabled and I need things delivered to my home quickly and cheaply. And...
01:05:29
Speaker
I know that Bezos is not a good guy and him buying the Washington post was awful. And you know, yeah but as I guess that kind of leads me to my next question, what do we do about it? Like you're involved in act activism. What do regular people that don't have a lot of money?
01:05:50
Speaker
what do we do?
01:05:54
Speaker
So
01:05:57
Speaker
let me tell you about my cousin. Okay. He's a highly intelligent and observant person. He has a master's degree. He was a high-level administrator in a human services organization.
01:06:16
Speaker
Okay. He hates Trump. And he complains about Trump every time I see him. And he hates what the administration, Trump's administration, is doing to our country.
01:06:29
Speaker
But he made this comment. Huh? That's reasonable. Yep. So he made this comment when we were talking, what can I do?
01:06:44
Speaker
And, of course, the supposition here is that as an individual, there's nothing he can do to counterfeit Trump's administration attacks on our country and the Constitution. So he's not going to do anything.
01:07:00
Speaker
is yeah you know Even though he's highly intelligent, it's like he can't figure out that you can join a collective.
01:07:11
Speaker
Because it's true. Individually, he can't do a damn thing. he doesn't He doesn't have wealth and power and influence.
01:07:21
Speaker
But it it's like it never occurred to him, join ah group, join a collective, and may and take collective action. And that's that's where your power is.
01:07:33
Speaker
That's where you can do something. Okay. Yeah, I like that. i think, ah now that I mention it, it was 2016 that I joined Satanic Temple.
01:07:45
Speaker
when Trump first got elected, I was like, oh man, shit's gonna start now. Who's doing the best work out there? And I mean, I'm not gonna say that Satanic Temple does better work than like the ACLU or anything, but but they they do good work and they do it in ah in a trollish way, which I appreciate as a person who appreciates trolling. Like I'm, I'm not a hundred percent on Gavin Newsom as a politician, but I love the trolling thing that he's doing. It is cracking me up because the, well, and Mel Brooks used to talk about this, you know, Nazis like it when you are like screaming at them.
01:08:27
Speaker
Because they like making people upset and standing there calmly and saying, wow, boy, don't you look upset. You know, like they love that shit. But Nazis cannot stand being mocked.
01:08:39
Speaker
They fucking hate it So I i i mean, i want to be the annoying little brother in the backseat toward the Nazis. that's That's what I want. I want them driven insane by the fact of just knowing that people are laughing at them.
01:08:56
Speaker
That we're not taking you seriously. That we don't think all your gold ridiculous decor makes you look posh and regal. You know, you look like an idiot. We're all laughing at you and you were never shot. Okay, that's that.
01:09:11
Speaker
But again, i don't want to go off on too much of a tangent. But god damn, I hate that guy. And it's it's just so frustrating that people don't see it.
01:09:23
Speaker
That people will look you square in the face and say things like, Oh, well, tell me that he when he lied. Tell me one lie. Like, dude, tell me one truth. What are you even saying?
01:09:36
Speaker
and it's... I mean, it's like Mugatu. I feel like I'm taking crazy pills.
01:09:44
Speaker
It's... ah And that's... I think that's part of it, that they want to be overwhelming. That's why every day there there might be nothing going on and Trump will just be like, I think I'm going to pardon Derek Chauvin or, you know, just something like, what can I do to make people furious?
01:10:04
Speaker
Which is why I love when the response is trolling. Because he's already, Trump has stopped posting in all caps over the last three days. He has not done one post in all caps because Gavin has been making fun of him for it.
01:10:17
Speaker
I hadn't noticed that. That's interesting. Yeah. Share that with my wife. Yeah. Do. Please do. Everyone should know and laugh about that by all means.
01:10:28
Speaker
When my, when my wife gets home from work, um, you know, we're having dinner and, um, I, one, one of the things, uh, I always joke about is, well, let's watch the evening news and see what insanity Trump is. addict What's the, what fresh hell is this?
01:10:46
Speaker
Yeah. Yeah. So I guess the question becomes, is it even going to be possible to put America right again without like a war or because, I mean, there was a point a couple years ago where I said, well, OK, wait a minute. How did the Nazis get defeated?
01:11:10
Speaker
Oh, right. The Americans showed up. I mean, I don't want to say we single-handedly defeated the Nazis, but I think it was our eventual involvement in World War that kind of helped swing things in the right direction.
01:11:24
Speaker
Absolutely. There's no one coming to help us. that we're We're it. We're the ones with the biggest army, and now we're the ones with all the Nazis. So unless... I mean, because what seemed to start having an effect...
01:11:39
Speaker
was people getting hit in their wallets. You know, these Dominion lawsuits where Dominion finally said, hang on, we're not going to just stand here and say you're wrong. You slandered us. You said there was a stolen election.
01:11:52
Speaker
There wasn't. And it took so long. But I mean, Fox News and OANN and Newsmax, and like they all had to pay money for lying.
01:12:04
Speaker
But yet people still repeat all the lies. Like the damage is not mitigated by the fact that they were proven to be liars. People still take Hannity and Tucker and, you know, Jeanine Pirro has a government job now. It's terrifying because all of those people, not only were they proven to be liars, but their own networks went into court and said no one in their right mind would take Tucker Carlson seriously.
01:12:30
Speaker
No one with a brain would listen to Sean Hannity and think he's telling the truth. And yet, they do.
01:12:40
Speaker
so yeah Yeah, I'm trying so hard not to get tangency and I'm failing so bad. But like can there be? i mean, how how does this end?
01:12:51
Speaker
People are still talking about the 2028 election and i have no reason to think there's going to be a free and fair election in 2028. I think the last election was stolen.
01:13:02
Speaker
i think the 2020 election, the reason that they say it was stolen is because they tried to steal it and weren't able to because there were so many mail-in ballots.
01:13:13
Speaker
Because they really tried to stop mail-in ballots. That was the whole thing about putting Louis DeJoy in charge of the post office. Yeah. Because he was getting rid of drop boxes and just really screwing things up.
01:13:24
Speaker
Because I had started a business in 2017.
01:13:28
Speaker
And we were 80% mail owner. So having DeJoy in charge of the post office has been screwing up my business almost since its inception. Like it never occurred to me that the post office would be one of my problems because it is has always been one of the most efficiently run parts of the government.
01:13:50
Speaker
Yeah. And it's a service. It's, it's, it's not a business. It's not meant right. Exactly. Well, that's the thing is people say, Oh, it doesn't make a profit. It's not supposed to make a profit. You know, you wouldn't say that about firemen.
01:14:02
Speaker
Oh, firemen are useless. They're not making us any money. Well, that's not what they're for. That's a good analogy. I hadn't heard that. I like that one. Thank you.
01:14:13
Speaker
um so I, I'm, I, I think it's very important that we, hold on to some sort of hope. So, and there's, there's a few things that I'm holding on to.
01:14:30
Speaker
I, I think the numerous organizations that have sprung up as resistance, in addition to Indivisible, there's like voters, not politicians.
01:14:47
Speaker
There's a bunch of others too, that, because I'm getting all these emails ah from all these different organizations. They're all, they're great. And, and i think we need to get more people involved in one of these organizations that is close to their heart, whichever issue is closest to their heart, then that's the organization they need to go with because
01:15:18
Speaker
Lord knows Trump has given us so many different areas of concern. One of them has got to be, you know, close to home for you. Yep.
01:15:29
Speaker
One thing. Um, I'm also putting some hope into the 2026 elections. Um, I'm, I'm hoping that, um,
01:15:46
Speaker
they They will not be able to get away with the redistric redistricting in, that's a tough word, in Texas. But if they do, that Newsom in California and new York and Illinois will counteract whatever redistricting the red states do. Yeah,
01:16:08
Speaker
yeah Whitmer hasn't said anything about it. No, she's way too quiet, way too quiet. she needs to say something about immigration as well and not support. Yeah, she does.
01:16:20
Speaker
There's way too many ICE here. And I honestly didn't think there would be ICE here because we're pretty far away from the border that's making everybody angriest. You know, people come into Michigan from Canada and, you know, that to to be frank, they don't typically care if the immigrants are white unless they're outspokenly liberal.
01:16:40
Speaker
Yeah, we have ICE up here in the UP.
01:16:44
Speaker
Well, and the thing is, you can't even tell if the ice are real because we had people here at our apartment like very soon, within a week of of Trump saying, yeah, ice is going to be out in full force.
01:16:56
Speaker
And I don't even know if they were real because I was looking on Amazon recently and it cost less than $100 to get a black vest with an American flag on it like a lot of these ice guys are wearing and a hat that says ice and some decals for your car.
01:17:13
Speaker
and a big thing is zip ties and the stun gun. I mean, it doesn't cost very much money to get kitted up and look like ice. Because the people that knocked on our building door, they hit the buzzer and it was clear they didn't have a warrant because, and this is ah this is a quote, they said, we're looking for the family upstairs.
01:17:33
Speaker
And that's that's not what cops say when they come to your house. They don't give a vague description of where the person lives. so uh i i didn't let him in i don't think anybody else was here because it was like a weekday afternoon um but it's that's to me that's one of the scariest parts like every part of this is terrifying but the fact that there are people dressing up as ice and just taking people is i mean that is just terrifying i don't even have the words for it and
01:18:11
Speaker
I mean, as far as I'm concerned, law enforcement people, any law enforcement covering their faces on the job, that's like watchman shit. Like that that should not happen.
01:18:23
Speaker
No. And they were saying, but what's her name? Pam Bondi, one of those little Barbie girls that does Trump's bidding, yeah said that that ICE people aren't wearing masks.
01:18:34
Speaker
She said that they're not. Which like... I would translate that is as, ah oh, ICE agents aren't covering their faces, so anyone with a covered face must not be ICE.
01:18:46
Speaker
So they're not allowed to take anyone, and you should fight them back as if you're being kidnapped, because you are.
01:18:55
Speaker
And... Even that, that alone. i mean, because, you know, like I said, my husband is a black guy He's over six feet tall, which is the scariest type of black guy, apparently.
01:19:07
Speaker
um And we've had to have those kinds of talks of like, okay, you know not to put your hands in your pocket, right? Like, you know to make sure they can always see what your hands are doing. You know that you shouldn't make any stuff sudden moves, that you shouldn't have your hood up, that, you know...
01:19:24
Speaker
All these different things. And I mean, my husband is, I don't necessarily want to use the word docile, but he is a very calm person who does not drink, smoke, swear, use profanity at all.
01:19:38
Speaker
he He won't get rid of his Canadian coins on the bus because he thinks it's dishonest. That's the kind of guy I'm married to. But yet... I see on Nextdoor once or twice a year, oh, there was a tall black man. I think he's chasing the neighborhood.
01:19:53
Speaker
Like, bitch, he's going to work. He's out late at night at the same time because that's where his job is. He sounds like a good guy. He is a good guy. Well, I mean, I think he needs his eyesight checked because he tells me I'm beautiful every day and I don't know where he's getting that from.
01:20:12
Speaker
no.
01:20:15
Speaker
Like he finally got glasses and he's still saying it. Like, come on, dude. There you
01:20:23
Speaker
go. So think if we can have free and fair elections in 2026, we're going to take back Congress because people are so unhappy with Trump.
01:20:36
Speaker
Well, even i think the Epstein files is is the the tipping issue here, because a lot of people I don't know how, but a lot of people really thought that he was serious about stopping child molesters, which I'm sorry, i that's ludicrous on its face because that Epstein shit has been well known since the ninety s But a lot of people think he like burst into being on the set of The Apprentice.
01:21:02
Speaker
So they don't like remember any of that. Cause I'll say like, oh yeah, I haven't liked him since he knocked Don Jr. to the ground in front of a bunch of people. Cause I was a big fan of Don Jr. long, long time ago.
01:21:13
Speaker
And people didn't know about that either. And because everybody in the family has NDAs, they don't even confirm or deny these things. But yeah, i've I've always, always thought Donald Trump was like, first I thought he was just ridiculous because of all the gold. You know?
01:21:32
Speaker
it's It's just like, how desperate are you to look successful that you cover everything? it i mean, gold isn't even a good metal. It's soft, it's ugly.
01:21:43
Speaker
i mean, electronically, it does very little. Like, it's not even a good metal.
01:21:50
Speaker
and And plus I'm allergic to it. So I have a bias.
01:21:55
Speaker
Okay. So I actually, oh go ahead. Um, and then the, the third thing is, um, a massive general strike.
01:22:09
Speaker
That I think is, is a major hope that I'm holding onto. Um, Because if we can't get that coordinated, and that's one thing I'm trying to do, that's been one of my major focuses.
01:22:22
Speaker
And I've actually tried to volunteer for a group that was worked supposedly working towards that. And it's, they never got back to me, but anyways, um, you know, it's part of the, uh, uh, Erica Chenoweth 3.5% of the population. If you can get that kind of participation, then it's going to be effective.
01:22:45
Speaker
um You know, and that's what 11 or 12 million people. yeah If we can get that or even better and you know in a general strike,
01:22:58
Speaker
um then that may be able to turn the tide. And I love that. that's what
01:23:11
Speaker
so that's what i'm that's what I'm hoping for. If we can't have that, then my fear is that we will end up having bloodshed. Yeah. Oh yeah. Well, I mean, it seems like I was always pretty serious. I was, I worked on a Kamala campaign. I was, ah um, what do they call it? It's, it's kind of like being an influencer, like an ambassador.
01:23:36
Speaker
And basically I just talked everybody's ear off and kept lists and got paid for it. Um, But I felt pretty confident that America, as we know it, would be over if if he somehow got back in office. And I honestly don't believe that he won fair and square.
01:23:53
Speaker
i think that, you know, I'm very much on team Elon rigged the count. um But.
01:24:03
Speaker
ah and I lost my train of thought again. But that if. ah
01:24:10
Speaker
Damn it, I'm going end up cutting this out in post because I'm so mumbly.
01:24:15
Speaker
It's just that's... We all thought that like you know America would would not be the same after a another Trump presidency because they were so ready and in Project 2025 and all that that they were very serious about making permanent changes that did nothing good for the citizenry. It was all about control and fascism.
01:24:39
Speaker
And that's exactly what's happening. yes um But if we have midterms, like if we really have midterms and take Congress back, I think impeachments would happen first and foremost and and the files being released.
01:24:53
Speaker
Now, I did see, like a lot of people, the Snopes fact check that 47% of Trump voters said that they would remain Trump voters even if he were implicated in the Epstein files.
01:25:08
Speaker
And we could do a whole show about that, I'm sure. Like, wait, what what is it about Christians that makes them susceptible to thinking that pedophilia is okay?
01:25:21
Speaker
Is it because their religion is based on a god impregnating a 14-year-old without consent, even though she already had a fiancé? Who can say?
01:25:32
Speaker
um but You know, that this is probably a good time to mention that only about 200 people actually listen to this show. And that's why I say whatever the hell I want. Because why my ah philosophy on internet safety and security has always been that I'm nobody and nobody cares what I say. So I just say what I want.
01:25:53
Speaker
And it'd be quite the double-edged sword if that ever didn't happen. Where like suddenly somebody cares what I have to say. it's like, oh, wait a minute. You're a pot-smoking criminal that talks about a lot of crazy sex things, right?
01:26:08
Speaker
Like, yeah, but you're not supposed to care.
01:26:14
Speaker
So horror actually is not your only genre. And we've talked about that a little bit. You've got a fantasy book coming up. And I love the name of it because it's The Adventures of Argyle Sock.
01:26:26
Speaker
But the Argyle has the capital L in it. And you were telling me there's a reason for that. So I want to hear it. Okay, so lot of people don't know this.
01:26:37
Speaker
um So this is going to be big news.
01:26:41
Speaker
There is a left sock and a right sock. And so the capital L means um that it's the left sock. And so A capital R, G-Y-L-E would be the right sock.
01:26:58
Speaker
And that's actually the brother. So um the main character, Argyle sock with a capital L is Giles.
01:27:10
Speaker
And the brother is Giler.
01:27:15
Speaker
No way. Oh, yeah. and And by the way, they would really appreciate it if you would wear them on the right foot, you know, the correct foot.
01:27:26
Speaker
That is so wild. I don't know if you know this because we don't really follow each other on social media. but i got a bunch of new socks this year and one of them had like a print of a skeleton on it and i don't typically notice unless they're toe socks i rarely pay attention to right sock left stock even though i am vaguely aware as you were saying i grew up ah with dance so when you buy a pair of dance shoes they don't have a right and left they develop that after you wear that but it's very important that you wear them on the right feet so that they
01:27:59
Speaker
you know, acclimate to your correct feet. So anyway, so I'm wearing these, uh, skeleton socks and I take a picture for the internet. I'm like, Oh, aren't these cute? They're skeleton socks. and Like six hours later, all these MAGA boys are like, you dumb bitch, you're wearing them on the wrong feet.
01:28:15
Speaker
ah Like, like, okay, you don't have to be so MAGA boy about it, but like, yeah, I am clearly an idiot who doesn't understand socks. Um, You know, most the time I can't tell either. i yeah I'm just joking about wearing it on my arm.
01:28:35
Speaker
So, yeah yeah, anyways, I do ah do write mainstream stuff. I write poetry, essays, scripts, plays, short stories.
01:28:47
Speaker
But I do have a natural affinity for fantasy. And because, you know, it lets my imagination run wild. and And that's just fun.
01:28:57
Speaker
I worked on Argyle Sock for over 30 years off and on. Wow. Yeah. I was living with my mother-in-law and her said significant other, Frank, in West Olive, Michigan.
01:29:13
Speaker
Okay. This was after losing my job at Hannibal, like we talked about earlier when I got clinically depressed. So we had no money. Monica had just given birth to our second child, Christiana, and she wasn't working.
01:29:29
Speaker
um And I was still too depressed to work. So we had to move in with them.
01:29:38
Speaker
yeah And so I decided, well, I got to do something. You know, i was used to working and it was just driving me nuts not to be doing something. So I decided to start writing a book.
01:29:52
Speaker
And I wanted to answer that age old question of what happens to the sock when it disappears in the laundry. i I went to the drawer where my socks were and I grabbed what I thought at the time was my most interesting sock, which happened to be a tan and yellow Argyle sock.
01:30:11
Speaker
Okay. Which I still have 30 some years later. that was going to be my main character. And then I knew, uh, that he was going to go to the lost world.
01:30:25
Speaker
And I needed some secondary characters that tended to get lost as well. So I opened the drawer of the desk that I was writing at, and i found, some paper clips and, uh, some interesting rubber bands, uh, including a blue one.
01:30:46
Speaker
And those were the basis for some of my first characters. and And then I just went from there. And I end wow ended up finishing it after our retired um in twenty seventeen so and I it was 2018 when i I finally got it finished.
01:31:12
Speaker
Wow. Okay. So we'll have, do you have a link tree? Because we'll put your link tree in the description. I don't have a Linktree. Well, you need to get one.
01:31:24
Speaker
Okay. i tip I don't like to go around telling people what to do, but Linktree is one of the greatest inventions of the modern age um because basically you go to Linktree, You put all your links into it. So at all the sites that have, they only let you have one link.
01:31:40
Speaker
You can put that link and it takes people to all of your different things. So you can put all your socials, your various book series. You know, if you write under different names or different genres, you can list all of that there.
01:31:53
Speaker
So, and then it's easier for me because I could say, here it is one link. Okay. You're right. I need to do that.
Literary Events and Upcoming Works
01:32:02
Speaker
And you know, yes, it will be able to help me with that.
01:32:05
Speaker
Yes. Yeah. Yeah. Okay. So, I mean, getting into like Zeitgeist related things, what ah books are you looking forward to that are coming out from people that you read?
01:32:18
Speaker
um
01:32:21
Speaker
Let's see.
01:32:24
Speaker
So um one one writer that I really like, and and you may be familiar with her because she's down in your area. is Kathy Koja.
01:32:38
Speaker
And Meerkat Press is going to be re-releasing her book, Skin. Oh, okay. When that comes out, I plan to pick up that.
01:32:52
Speaker
And then there's a local writer here in Escanaba named J.L. Hyde. She's having a book launching for her newest novel, and I can't think of the name of it off the top of my head.
01:33:04
Speaker
But she's going to be doing that at the public library. So I'm going to go there and get a signed copy. Oh, cool. Yeah. So that's what I'm looking forward to. I find also that, yeah, like like what you were saying, that some of the books that I get the most excited for are not even mainstream books. They're stuff that my friend is writing.
01:33:25
Speaker
ah My friend Gina is working on a book about... It is nonfiction, too, and I hardly ever get excited for nonfiction, even though I read a lot of it. I'm not like, oh, I can't wait for it to come out.
01:33:36
Speaker
But she's she's working on a book about media representation of different types of mental illness and and how basically how how bad they all are and why people don't understand mental illness because they think they do, because they saw a movie about it.
01:33:53
Speaker
yeah And very rarely are these things depicted correctly. They're depicted for dramatic impact. You know, like if if you thought all autistic people were were like the Rain Man, for example, you'd probably have a very skewed idea of of what someone else is saying when they say, oh, my kid's autistic.
01:34:15
Speaker
Like, oh, so they like Judge Wapner? Like, no, you idiot. it's That's not all that it is. You know, or ah Tourette's is another one of those things that people think they understand, but they do not.
01:34:29
Speaker
Yeah. um So wait, was there, we're actually running out of time. We're getting towards the end here. So I want to make sure, was there anything that you wanted to discuss that we did not get to?
01:34:42
Speaker
um Let's share my website. I've got an author's website. Well, you're going to have a link tree. So all that information will be available in the description. ah Okay. but You can tell us your website name too, you know, for those, those audio learners.
01:34:57
Speaker
It's mkellypeach.com. mkellypeach, all one word,.com. And that's Kelly, K-E-L-L-Y, extra E. And then peach like a spring.
01:35:09
Speaker
Okay. Cause you know, people be using that extra E. like Quit hogging all the E's. All right. yeah and And we also, um, Oh, you know what? I skipped a question, actually. The question, if someone is unfamiliar with your work, where is the best place to start? Because that's an important question. I know when I discover a new ah author...
01:35:32
Speaker
I never know. Like if, you know, I read whatever the thing is that I discovered them with, but then if I go back, like, could you do imagine if you've never read Stephen King and you just discovered him and wanted to like read Stephen King, where on earth would you begin?
01:35:47
Speaker
So where, where do we begin with you? I think I would go ahead and direct them to that website, my website. Okay. I've got excerpts for, for my works and,
01:36:02
Speaker
Oh, that's helpful. And a lot of you know, personal and information about myself is as a person and as a writer. Well, that's really the best way I think to go about it when someone like you that's very eclectic, writes in different genres to to just give people all of the options and let them decide rather than saying, you know, this is the quintessential me because the more eclectic you are, the less likely there is to be one book that's the quintessential you, right?
Reflections and Personal Growth
01:36:33
Speaker
Okay. So I also would like to give guests an opportunity to ask me a question if they have one. So if you do, now is the time. um Well, ah first of all, let me say I really enjoyed this, this chat that we've had.
01:36:50
Speaker
Cool. It's been fun. And, and your questions are very good. And they allow me to really just like open up and expand and,
01:37:03
Speaker
not be an introvert. Well, and i'm I'm glad that you feel that way because I know it is difficult, particularly for introverts, but kind of for everyone because i think writers in particular may not want to answer a lot of questions about themselves and their work and how it got there, not just because those things are very personal,
01:37:26
Speaker
but because this is the internet and people judge you here. So it's, it's always very gratifying to me. And I'm so grateful when people come and are are so generous with their stories and with their experiences like you've been, because I think, I mean, the reason that I decided to do this in the first place is because there is so much misinformation going around and it's, it's people don't,
01:37:51
Speaker
Unless you know someone who's been through these things or had some of these conditions or who is a creative type who works on things, you know, works through things in that way, you just, you don't know.
01:38:04
Speaker
i mean, that's, I'm of the belief that humanity is basically good. And even people that seem like complete fucking assholes are probably working on bad information.
01:38:15
Speaker
So if we have the opportunity to humanize these issues, and put them out there where people can see them, I think that it will make a difference. Now, again, the problem that I have is that only a couple hundred people listen to this show, which has its its upsides and its downsides.
01:38:34
Speaker
But but i I am just so grateful to to the guests who come on and and really, because people dig deep. And I mean, it's these things are difficult to discuss because there is so much stigma and judgment around them.
01:38:49
Speaker
Yeah, some of them. know and So what i would I think what I'd like to ask you is if you could tell me about but yourself and your work a little bit. Oh, gosh. And the podcast. Yeah.
01:39:04
Speaker
and You know, I actually i actually the first episode of the show, the very first one that we did, i invited a neurotypical friend to come on the show. And so that I could talk about all my stuff because I my thinking was that it's not really fair to invite people on and ask them to reveal such such personal, emotionally intimate things without doing it myself.
01:39:28
Speaker
So I did. And if you ever want to go back and hear the first episode, I talk about um like some diagnoses that I had when I was young that were never treated, um being in an abusive household, both both like emotionally and then in in terms of physical violence.
01:39:44
Speaker
ah We lived next door to a sex offender for a while, for a long time, actually, between second grade and being a junior in high school. Our next door neighbor was a gropey pedophile.
01:39:56
Speaker
um And then later on, you know, I started drinking and smoking a bunch of weed and that it turned out first they told me i had depression, i was bipolar, maybe I had ADHD, like everybody was guessing and guessing and I was trying all these different medications.
01:40:13
Speaker
And I also lost some jobs and made some very stupid mistakes. I was making a lot of bad decisions about men. I had a pretty laissez-faire attitude about crime, ah both committing it and supporting other people who committed it.
01:40:29
Speaker
Because, you know, if you smoke weed every day and weed is illegal, all laws start to seem stupid after a while, depending on whatever else is going on in your life.
01:40:41
Speaker
So, yeah. And then when I was 29, I met the guy that I eventually married and realized that life is a completely different experience when someone loves you unconditionally.
01:40:55
Speaker
Because I did not find out what that felt like until I was almost 30. And I was like, wait a minute. This is awesome. Everyone should have this. Oh, wow. That's great.
01:41:07
Speaker
So, yeah. And then when I was 30, almost 34, I had lost my job at the at the movie theater.
01:41:19
Speaker
um The theater closed down. And I didn't have a job as of, like, summer. And I was freaking out. So I decided to, actually, my thinking was, holy shit, I'm not going to have money to buy weed.
01:41:33
Speaker
and Maybe I should get some therapy. That was my thinking. So i I joined a program. And because I'm poor, it was a county program. And they said, okay, well, we can treat you for your mental illness. But this is a dual diagnosis program. So you have to be sober, too.
01:41:49
Speaker
And I was like, well, I'm not going to be doing that. And they kind of talked me into it. And i did i did, I stopped drinking regularly. um i didn't do like acid or mushrooms or whatever every weekend. Because I was kind of one of those people that was like, oh, that's going to alter my consciousness. Yes, thank you. I will have some.
01:42:10
Speaker
With, the I mean, not super hard stuff. Like I never shot heroin, but, but you know, no no crack. But you know I did try most things that were available to me, which is not necessarily something I'd recommend.
01:42:27
Speaker
um kids Kids, be smarter than me, please. um but But no, so I was determined ah at age 33 that I was going to use that time to do something valuable.
01:42:42
Speaker
And my buddy told me about the NaNoWriMo, the National Novel Writing Month. And I sat down and I wrote what became my first public published novel, which is called A Stabbing for Sadie.
01:42:54
Speaker
And it's a total Mary Sue. It's about a fat, crazy girl who murders her abusive mother. um But my my mom is alive. I always make that clear why i when people ask about it. And that book actually, I'm re-releasing it. I just finished another edit and it's coming out in a third edition in ah in just a week or two, actually. So it's a Stabbing for Sadie third edition.
01:43:20
Speaker
And i'm I'm pretty excited to have it back out there. um Having re-read it, I was like, wow, I've changed a lot as a person and a writer since then. But this is still a good book. It still has value.
01:43:33
Speaker
So I'm excited to get it back out there. um And then, yeah, I did. ah This is actually not my first podcast. I did one years ago that was just stories and novel chapters.
01:43:44
Speaker
um I went to college with a guy named Scott Sigler, who sort of invented the podcast novel. I don't know if he was the very first, but he was among the first like dozen or so people.
01:43:57
Speaker
ah that were making podcast novels and like using this new tech to advance books. And so I started doing that and didn't really have as much success at it as a lot of other people.
01:44:10
Speaker
I'm pretty good at reading, um you know, doing audio book reads. That's what my other podcast is right now. We have another podcast called Gratis Guignol. where we give out free horror stories and it's mostly my stories but there's some post stuff on there ah my husband and i did cask of amontillado and he he's shy he's much more introverted than than i am but i i got him to do it and and uh fortunato sounds drunk as hell which is great because my husband does not drink and he still managed to pull it off beautifully
01:44:46
Speaker
so So yeah, and I also, in between all that, I started a soap business, Scared Soapless, and we do horror-themed soaps, and we do resin art, candles, lip balms, stuff like that. so So that's how I keep busy.
01:45:01
Speaker
Oh, and I've also been a sex writer for like the last 20 years. and And what about your name? What's that? What about your magazine? but Sometimes hilarious horror. Yeah, it's great. That's actually not my first magazine either. Wow.
01:45:17
Speaker
A while ago, i was hired to do the rebrand of e-horror as an imprint of e-fiction, which was pretty big at the time. And then um they were trying to, you know, boost their their readership, which we really did not do. And so that got when that got shut down, i said, oh, well, maybe I'm not really meant to do that.
01:45:39
Speaker
And then i had a medical thing 2022. um And I almost died. I was sick for a long time. I was bedridden for like six months and I almost died. And when I got better, I decided, you know, I mean, it was kind of like when I lost my job, but times a million. I'm like, okay, I'm still alive. So I'm going to make that mean something.
01:46:02
Speaker
First things first, I'm going to write a new short story at least every week. And then i to to motivate myself to do that, I started a Patreon because I knew if people were watching me, i would be more
Community Support and Creative Ventures
01:46:16
Speaker
motivated.
01:46:16
Speaker
yeah And then I was trying to think of perks and I said, well I'll just put everything together in a magazine. And then I thought, well, shit, if I'm making a magazine, it's kind of stupid to just make it with myself.
01:46:28
Speaker
because I know a bajillion great writers and people started submitting and I didn't, I never want to be one of those people that doesn't pay contributors.
01:46:39
Speaker
And a lot of people that do small magazines, particularly when they're just e-magazines, their payment, and I'm using air quotes, their payment structure is a royalty share.
01:46:51
Speaker
So the agreement, and that's what we did it at eHorror. It was, you know, once we sell a certain number of issues and everybody gets a minimum payment of of X amount, like once we earn that much, we send out the money and the money doesn't materialize.
01:47:06
Speaker
You know, I was the managing editor, but I was not the editor in chief. So I didn't see the numbers then. um, So when I started my own magazine and I see all the numbers, ah right now the magazine is is not making me money. It's costing money. I'm actually selling off my collectibles.
01:47:22
Speaker
I just sold my Michael C. Hall autograph, which kind of bums me out, but I'm funding the new issue because we pay our contributors $25 for their stories.
01:47:34
Speaker
And that's regardless of length. That is a flat fee, $25. So if it's a five-line poem or 10,000-word story, I feel strongly philosophically that the length of the story does not determine its worth.
01:47:52
Speaker
And that's just, you know, a position I have. And the reason it's $25 is so that if someone wants to join Horror Writers Association at the affiliate level, that is the the sale amount that's required to do that.
01:48:07
Speaker
So that's a gift that we we give writers if if that's something they want to do Because I know ah Pete Kale put me in an anthology called Not Your Average Monster years ago that enabled me to join Horror Writers Association. And I found that personally very validating to not just be... Because I was already published at that point, but I wasn't really making you know grown-up money.
01:48:34
Speaker
And so I felt... very much like like I had become part of the the writing community and not just somebody who was trying to be part of the the community. That was how I received it emotionally. Like it was it was validating in that way.
01:48:52
Speaker
So that's what we try to do, even though we can't really afford to do it. So do find us on Ko-fi, where we are sometimes hilarious horror. You can support us starting at like $2 a month, and that lets you read everything.
01:49:07
Speaker
ah Starting at the $10 level, you can download everything. And that's past issues too, because that's how those kind of sites work. So you join once, you can download everything and enjoy all of it.
01:49:19
Speaker
We have guests, cover artists every month. My husband does like the graphics end of it, but we always have a different artist come in and do the covers as well. And the stories...
01:49:30
Speaker
They're so good and they come in from all over the world. I'm really lucky and grateful that we have so many contributors that send us stuff. I think people found out we were paying and we just got avalanched with submissions.
01:49:44
Speaker
But I love the combination of horror and comedy. You know, sometimes hilarious horror is, I mean, sometimes murder is hilarious. I can't help that. I don't make the rules.
01:50:01
Speaker
All right. um Wow, i I talked a lot there, didn't I? All right, so so it's ah it's time for the Mad Libs. So are you ready for that? Oh, yeah, okay. Because we we always end the show with a Mad Lib, and I don't have permission for Mad Libs to do that.
01:50:16
Speaker
so So no one tell them, okay? Again, that's what happens when you have a small following. You just straight up steal people's IP, and no one finds out. um Okay, so let's see.
01:50:28
Speaker
Nouns. One, two, three, four. Looks like four singular nouns. Nope, five. Five singular nouns.
01:50:41
Speaker
Okay. Five singular nouns. Let's go scarf.
01:50:52
Speaker
Wait, what is it? singular noun? Yes.
01:50:58
Speaker
And rat.
01:51:06
Speaker
Tennis racket.
01:51:15
Speaker
Saucepan. And
01:51:20
Speaker
we need one more. Actually, I miscounted. I need two more. Okay. um
01:51:33
Speaker
Tiger Lily.
01:51:39
Speaker
Okay.
01:51:41
Speaker
One more. Yep. One more. Okay. How about
01:51:50
Speaker
ruler?
01:51:53
Speaker
All right. I need an adverb.
01:52:03
Speaker
Some of these are kind of short, but this one has like a million words. Let's see, actually one, two, two, two adverbs. Okay.
01:52:16
Speaker
Heavily.
01:52:23
Speaker
Sorrowfully.
01:52:28
Speaker
All right. ah So it says here, person in a room. That's always the guest. And I need a verb. Actually, it looks like I need two verbs.
01:52:40
Speaker
Okay. And those are always going to be present tense. Okay.
01:52:47
Speaker
Shower.
01:52:50
Speaker
And...
01:52:54
Speaker
Jump. Okay, I need a place. Place. Okay.
01:53:06
Speaker
Like a geographic place or? Any kind of place. Any kind of place? Okay. Let's go kitchen.
01:53:18
Speaker
And a plural noun. i need two of those actually, two plural nouns. Okay. Necklaces and signs.
01:53:30
Speaker
All right. I need a part of the body plural. Part of the body. Eyes. Okay. And two adjectives. Nope.
01:53:42
Speaker
Three. Three adjectives. Short. Blue.
01:53:49
Speaker
Wait, what was that? Blue. The color blue. Blue. All right. And one more.
01:53:57
Speaker
Mean.
01:54:01
Speaker
Alright, and last one is a part of the body plural again. Legs.
Fun and Gratitude to Supporters
01:54:11
Speaker
Okay, this is called Little League Hero.
01:54:17
Speaker
Even though I practiced heavily all season long and never missed any practices, Coach Michael didn't think I was ready to shower in a real game.
01:54:29
Speaker
I finally got my shot. The kitchen necklaces were beating us sorrowfully, and our best player was injured. So, in the ninth inning, with two outs and the signs loaded, Coach's eyes searched the bench for a pinch rat.
01:54:48
Speaker
His eyes fell on me, and he gave me the nod. My tennis... Oh, I reached for my tennis racket, raced to the plate, and gave the pitcher my most short stare.
01:55:01
Speaker
The pitcher threw a fast tiger lily. I swung and hit it out of the ruler for a Grand Slam home saucepan. Oh, the kitchen necklace is one of like that.
01:55:15
Speaker
The crowd went blue as I ran the bases. Oh, no, I i but i missed one. Wait, I got a I gotta add one here. I missed a part of the body, so I had to add one.
01:55:28
Speaker
Alright? As I ran the bases, my teammates patted me on the testicles and shouted, Way to jump, Wedness! Because there was another person in the room here, so I put me.
01:55:39
Speaker
They carried me off the field on their legs. It was the most mean moment of my life.
01:55:48
Speaker
Yeah, see, med-libs are always great. yeah And I love them because you can play them with kindergartners or a room full of perverts, and it does not matter. It's always hilarious. <unk> It is, yeah.
01:55:59
Speaker
We had Mad Libs at my wedding. We made little Mad Lib books, and they were so cute, and people took them home. Cool. Right? Yeah. Well, Mike, I am so glad that you could be here and that we could do this. This was a great conversation, and I hope that people get a lot from it.
01:56:18
Speaker
too. Yeah, I really enjoyed it. Cool, cool. We want to remind all of our listeners to find us on Ko-Fi, where we are sometimes hilarious horror.
01:56:31
Speaker
um Supporting the magazine is a great way to support the show. It's also a great way to stick it to the mend because we do not use AI. We are self-supporting and we're a small business. And if you believe that artists should be paid, you hear a lot of that online. People should be paid. We pay people.
01:56:53
Speaker
And the way that we pay people is with the money that we get from subscribers and supporters. So please do that. And if you support the magazine at the $10 level or above, we'll also put your name in there as a donor. And you can put a little message in the issue, too, if you want to.
01:57:11
Speaker
So if you want to say, fight the fash, we'll put that. at Damn, Lion, that's in the magazine anyway. You don't have to give us money for that. But you can. So we'll see everybody next week.
01:57:22
Speaker
Bye.