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Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles (2014)
30 Plays3 months ago
This week on the Everything Actioncast, Zach and Chris get shell-shocked by the 2014 version of Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles, which came out 10 years ago this week. The new TMNT animated series, Tales of the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles, is also out on Paramount+.
Produced by Michael Bay, Megan Fox stars as April O'Neil, who is trying to break her way into becoming a legitimate reporter at Channel 6 News and investigating a series of high-tech crimes around New York City perpetrated by The Foot, a group of mysterious mercenaries. April learns that a group of vigilantes are fighting The Foot and is shocked to learn that they are Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles. Zach and Chris talk about the decision to make April have the Turtles and Splinter as pets as a kid, her insane conspiracy theory attempts to convince people what is going on, the location of Eric Sacks's (William Fichtner) mountain estate in relation to NYC, Shredder's Transformers style mech suit, the roided-out look of these TMNT and more.
You can watch Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles on Paramount+ or PlutoTV. Next week, we'll be caught in the battle of Alien vs. Predator as that movie celebrates its 20th anniversary and Alien: Romulus hits theaters.
We want to hear your comments and feedback. Send them all to [email protected]. Also, let us know your suggestions for movies for us to discuss.
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Transcript
Introduction and Host Welcome
00:00:03
Speaker
Welcome to the Everything Action Cast, the official podcast of EverythingAction.com.
00:00:18
Speaker
Hello and welcome to the Everything Action Cast podcast for the week of August 5th, 2024. I'm your I'm your co-host Chris.
TMNT 2014 Anniversary and New Series
00:00:27
Speaker
Yeah, and this week, ah to quote the rap song at the end of this movie, ah knock, knock, you're about to get shell-shocked. We are talking about the 2014 Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles movie because it's celebrating its 10th anniversary. And we're also getting a new Turtles animated series. It's actually out right now if you're hearing this on Parent Plus, Tales of the TMNT, which is based on the, I think i think you and I both agree, a much superior Mutant Mayhem movie compared to the 2014 movie, Chris.
00:00:59
Speaker
Wait, this is superior to the Moon Mayhem? No, the Moon Mayhem is superior to... Oh, in 2014, yeah. Oh my god, like in a crazy amount of ways. Yes. Yeah, 2014, it's just a weird... um Because I think this might be the it's one of the first things, or like... It's
Nickelodeon's TMNT Acquisition
00:01:21
Speaker
definitely very soon after they so like they they sold the rights to Nickelodeon. And and so they had Nickelodeon CG show.
00:01:29
Speaker
And then this came out. And, but then we also had like the team and T like that animated movie. And because, because that was maybe for Nickelodeon bought them, like that, like that any sort of like sequels or anything to that movie got canceled. And then we got like the, the animated series of Nickelodeon and we got this reboot, which is um very, very heavily inspired by it seems like the Transformers movie by Michael Bay. Oh, they could be set in the same universe.
00:01:58
Speaker
Yes, maybe that maybe that there might have been like a like a idea at some point, but possibly. But yeah, Michael Bay, I think a lot of people assume like almost like, oh, he directed this movie along with the Transformers. He exactly produced this movie. Justin Leesman directed the movie. He directed like Wrath of the Titans and Texas Bell Battle Los Angeles.
Michael Bay's Influence on TMNT
00:02:22
Speaker
but i But Michael i mean michael Bay's influence is all over. I think from like the designs of the turtles to like like definitely Shredder is very Transformers-esque in this movie. like He looks like he could just be like a Transformer. ah like the the the some of A lot of the humor is very Michael Bay.
00:02:46
Speaker
But yeah, but it's it's it's another ah origin story. so it's you know it's once again, back to like, no one knows that turtles exist and they are, but there's like this kind of like whispers, like these vigilantes are out there. And then like the foot clan who are now, they're not ninjas anymore. They're mercenaries in this movie. And they also, they look like the, um, immortals from 300. Like they're like that, like elite, the warrior group, like ah like the Persian army group, like the ninjas from the Persian army. yeah like It's like, they have the exact same like mask on.
00:03:19
Speaker
and but then yeah Yeah, they have like the the generic like high cheekbone muscle face. Yeah, but they're not ninjas. they're They have guns. like They're not really doing like ninjitsu. Yeah, they have like one real ninja on that clip claim. It's karate. Everyone else is not a
Villain's Plan in TMNT
00:03:36
Speaker
ninja. Technically, Shredder looks like a samurai. so And William Fittner is the scientist slash other Shredder at that got rewritten.
00:03:47
Speaker
yeah well you Spoilers, you find out that he's like the ah he's like Shredder's apprentice. who but he He runs like this multi-billion dollar company, but then he's trying to do this like perfect plan to destroy, somewhat destroy New York City to make more money. That's his only motivation, apparently. He's like, I'm going to be so rich. He's like, aren't you already rich? You have like you have like five companies and you own like you own a skyscraper in New York City.
00:04:20
Speaker
And like a like a lavish estate somewhere 20 minutes from New York that is like the Alps. That's like one of the biggest questions in this entire movie is like where the hell is that mansion? And what time of year does this movie take place in?
00:04:38
Speaker
Like do you have any like do you have any like idea? like i mean You know the area, Chris. like we're where Where could that be? They say it's a 20-minute helicopter flight from New York City. like where Where could that possibly be, where it's snowing? and where it's like Where it's like a giant mountain like range?
Geographic Confusion in TMNT
00:04:55
Speaker
I don't know. like The Andorondacks? Even but it's like in a helicopter ride is like maybe the Bronx? A helicopter ride isn't like a jet. No, yeah.
00:05:11
Speaker
even when you come in from like the seaport and you see the helicopters take off they're going to like down the seaport like it's not like a um crosstown thing where the helicopter can bring you to you say like new york also has like uh two major airports so you have to avoid those flight paths and then you have to avoid other helicopters so there's like safe designated routes to go new york so like the fly. the No one thinks about how much shit's in the air. So it's strange. But that's also like, like April and Vern, who's played by Will Arnett, they, they drive there twice in a van. So it's, it's, it's within driving distance in New York city. And also there's sewers that connected to New York city. So it's like, how the, like, if that is the aneuronic, if they're saying somehow the aneuronic somehow look like Colorado,
00:06:06
Speaker
Mm hmm. Or or looks like um that part of California that has mountains. But it's also but also like different trees. Yeah, but also it it't it doesn't seem like it's winter.
00:06:17
Speaker
Like, your city does not seem like it's winter. It's like summer. It's like spring in New York. Yeah, because because for some reason, that peak that they're going to looks like it's in the Alps. Yeah, it's like we full full there's like a foot of snow on the ground. It's like it's like a yeah it's like a ski resort, giant mountain range. it's like it's like and Unless William Fickner, he spent so much money to make a weather domination. Wherever he lives, it's just winter all year long. Yes.
00:06:46
Speaker
That's the only explanation that makes sense because like it's just like there's there's nowhere within this like circle of of the radius of like where they're staying in the sixth place where you'd have ah summeries a spring summer in New York City and then snow covered mountains.
00:07:01
Speaker
like an Unbelievable. like It's really distracting because all they had to do was say, hey let's just go see this guy who doesn't live in New York, but they really want to tie it in. It's as if like they filmed that scene first and went, oh shit, this movie takes place in New York City. Why could they make the, white yeah, why not make it winter in New York City too? Like it wouldn't affect anything really like crazy. It wouldn't affect the story. It's not like it's a Christmas movie. It's not like the snow was the secret to something. Yeah. Um,
00:07:38
Speaker
Yeah, it's really distracting because that that act comes in and it just it's very meaningless in the end. It's not like you discovered something super important that it was winter. It's only it's only winter for the big action sequence because then they're like they're sliding down the mountain and like it's like yeah that's like the whole point of why why they need snow.
00:08:03
Speaker
which is just like- But here's the thing, I've seen the sequel and it's like for whatever one act, they leave the country, right? And that's good writing. It's like, oh, i let's do a scene by like a giant river. New York doesn't have a giant river. So we'll just go to it and sort of explain in the movie why we had to go to it. Good. This was like, I want a scene where they they so like they do sledding. It's like, okay. Well, it's spring. Okay. So no, that one area of New York just has great sledding out there. That place where it's always snowing, no like even if it's like the middle of summer.
00:08:40
Speaker
yeah and it's a drivable and yes has great public sewer access. Yes, sewers connected directly to New York City like that you they could slide through. Where is this? Like if the movie sort of pointed it out or if it's like, hey, no, this place actually exists, um we should probably mention it, you know, like or or it's like, hey, you heard about that freak weather? Okay. You don't like something. but Instead, they went with the, ah he just lives in perpetual rich guy mansion housing.
00:09:12
Speaker
I don't know. It's super weird. It's still like upsetting because I'm like, man, that really just distracts you. It's it's a cool sequence. It doesn't make sense to the rest of the movie, which is a great statement for this whole movie. Because the rest, yeah, Mr. Edwards is like walking around in like light jackets or not even like t-shirts and then and like this is the whole thing. We're like April. April is like basically like Veronica Corning Stone. Like she's just getting like these like super fluffy, like non stories at the channel six.
April's Connection to Turtles
00:09:40
Speaker
And then but she wants to be like a ah real reporter.
00:09:43
Speaker
So that's why she's like investigating the the Foot Clan.
00:09:48
Speaker
And then but then yeah she and she does she witnesses like this like break-in at like this, ah or like they're trying to like steal something at like the docks. um And then she gets to like her first glimpse of the turtles. But then um and then she like she's the she there's like, does turtles leave a symbol every every time they stop a crime, apparently?
00:10:08
Speaker
and there's saying like what One of the craziest things besides like the the the weird like weather patterns is that, um and I don't think it's and ever been in any other turtles thing, is that April is like directly tied to like the origin of the turtles. And it was like, they were her pets, because and the because her there was there they were like her father's lab experiments, but she basically treated them as like her pets too.
00:10:36
Speaker
super like
00:10:40
Speaker
I didn't care for it so much, but the more I think about it, the more I'm upset about it. Cause it's like she knew these turtles. She saved them from this horrific fire that took the life of her father and she just like forgets what their name were. Yeah. They were like so like, like, like burned it. The shipment burned into her memory. ah But then I guess, I guess she thought they died. Well, she saved them. So I guess that I guess she just like assumed they would just like live in like the sewers and she would never see them again. I get it. But look the crazy thing is like,
00:11:11
Speaker
Uh, when she hears their name, she has to like see some, footets she was like 12 and like, remember that. Well, that's i'm like, yeah, here in the names is what jocks remember, not like seeing like, Hey, they're these weird turtle creatures. My dad was experimenting on turtles. Are they the same turtles? Maybe he's like, I'd like go read like my dad's research documents that I have. And then like.
00:11:36
Speaker
uh yeah watch like home um video footage what are the odds these mutant turtles are the same turtles i helped take care for they're they're named after renaissance painters and and i'm named zac colored yes the way she colored them yep
00:11:57
Speaker
it I do like for the secret science lab. ah She was able to bring in a camcorder that also survived the fire, or she brought that home all the footage. The footage also was labeled with the turtles' name on it, too. Yes. And also, like they're doing like this... like soup I'm assuming top-secret research, but then like we have pictures like, oh yeah, sure, i I'll retain this 10-year-old girl by doing an interview talking about our research. like Hey, you want to know how we made this mutagen? Here's the footage of like the ooze, the TCRI ooze. It's like, shouldn't that be behind behind a wall or something? Or like, would you, I don't think last box or would you let your daughters like wander around? Like we're doing this like highly high secret, like genetic experiments. I get it that it's your partner's daughter, right? It's yeah your, your business partner, science partners, like daughter.
00:12:52
Speaker
But there's still like a security breach where like this unauthorised footage has been filmed here like she's feeding the pizza which would like like with that like oh my god like what like you're supposed to have like a controlled environment for like because of this experiment just like here Hey guys, eat some pizza. like they're Like, hey, who can in reality, I think if you give turtle, they're probably be dead. No, yeah it won't die, but it can't digest probably all that dairy. So it's going to be like, oh, why is their turtle really sick? yeah it's It's so it's so nuts that like so much of like they're like, you know,
00:13:30
Speaker
origins come from April, like the colors, and the pizza, and yeah the names, yep ah the love, ah the hogashi.
00:13:41
Speaker
Yes, because this wonder tells the the boys that like, oh, we were saved by a guardian spirit that like, brought it like, brought us to the sewers. And they're like, it was Megan Fox. Yeah, here she is. I do, I do love like, one thing that I do love about this movie is um and there' like like the first act, like how Megan Fox basically turns to Charlie Day from It's Always Sunny with trying to unravel a conspiracy and like everyone just shoots you like a maniac. And she's like, I feel like a maniac. She's like, there's there's turtles, they're in. I named them. I named them Red Sized Painters. They're experiments, turtles, ninjas. And then when we go over, she's like, you're you're fired. like Get out of here.
00:14:22
Speaker
Oh, it's like you gotta stop doing drugs at work. She literally makes a conspiracy board. She makes a conspiracy board of like that. She shows what we Goldberg who's like the the editor or like the chief that are in chief of channel six. It's like, it's like the only thing I don't think she has registered anything, but it's basically the red, like a registered conspiracy board. It was like, look at turtles, ninjas, ooze. I was, I made them.
00:14:49
Speaker
Okay, is it crazier that I forget forgot Whoopi Goldberg's in this movie? Yeah. She comes out of nowhere. She's in for two scenes. And it's just kind of distracting because it's like she's just playing Whoopi Goldberg. You know, she's not playing a character. She's just there. And then she's the one who has to to say, hey, Megan Fox, um you drew a crazy board. You have to fire. This is an entire nightmare if I don't fire you.
00:15:19
Speaker
all the co-workers are all the co-workers around us are getting concerned there's also there's also that scene like um megafox is a roommate who apparently like is just like like her roommate just walks in she and megafox starts yelling at her about like i knew it they were name i named them i named the turtles then she's just like um i want to leave like my roommates a psycho so i did i did laugh at like the like yeah megafox is just like Like insane insanity. Is that roommate supposed to be the same character that was in the team and T cartoon show? Like, I don't even think like, what is that character's name even? I don't know. Like Taylor, I think, is according to Wikipedia, it's definitely not like a cartoon character. I'm going to take it out real quick.
00:16:11
Speaker
ah I'm sorry i surprised he pulled Vern in. like that That seems like ah a deep cut to pull from like the cartoon. I mean, he's a pretty regular series character. but You know what I mean? OK, so there's Vern. He was like snooty, and you see less and less of him. Oh, yeah. Willardette is like like not even trying to be. It's it's as it's name only, Vern. He's just Willardette. He's doing his regular Willardette thing. Irma. that Yeah, it's definitely not Irma. Irma Langston.
00:16:41
Speaker
Langston Stein, who like, I guess she never got like a contemporary remake character, but that could be Irma, but it's not. Nope, it's just some ah some random girl who somehow somehow became Mega Fox's roommate.
00:17:02
Speaker
But yeah, but eventually but eventually April does, like she does Meet the Turtles and ah and finds out they're alive.
Splinter's Ninjitsu Learning
00:17:12
Speaker
And then Splinter splitter remembers everything, apparently, and like tells them, like, they like here's, hey, boy, is this, like, it's been like, you know, 10 years or whatever, 20, 15 years, whatever, but I'll tell you the the actual origin story now, now that Mega Fox is here.
00:17:30
Speaker
But also, i was I was surprised, because like the, because Mayhem did the same thing, but like, Splinter learns Ninjitsu from a book that like washed into like the sewer. who are these people who are just flushing it on martial arts instruction manual without the toilet and they're effective yeah like i get that like you these days probably learning martial arts from a book is not recommended but this is something where these basic 101 najitsu books are being flushed down the sewer and they are very good
00:18:05
Speaker
Yeah. I think, um, you may have, I think was it was like a video. I think he watched. Yeah. Like Jenga Chan's Twitter finds like, they find like instructional video. Like he basically finds like tiger, uh, was they got, what's, what's that tiger? Tiger showman, tiger showman videos, basically. Yeah. Well, tiger showman is the karate school, but yeah. I know what you mean. Like it's just like self VHS self-defense courses, but we're not supposed to teach you like ninjutsu. Like it's not practical things.
00:18:32
Speaker
Yeah, yeah yes I mean the split split during this movie becomes like a like yeah, he becomes so fucking good like he's like every every weapon and like like yeah, like he's like I Do love that he uses his tail. Yeah, it's like as a weapon which is like I don't think I see another limb Yeah, no, I don't think our splinters ever done that in like our adaptation. So that's like a cool touch. I see like It's got good moments with Splinter. I do enjoy his like story and I was shocked because I kind of remember him being like an insult, especially when he's explaining like pizza. ah But now when he fights, when there's a thing we're seeing on the Foot Clan and he's whipping them around and then he's agile, he becomes like a like a bigger size Yoda. Yeah.
00:19:18
Speaker
It's great. Like him trying to fight a transformer or shredder in the sewer. Great scene. Um, particularly for me, it just seems like the fighting style is frantic. You know, like how do you fight a rat? Like, you know, do you think you go over the head? You really don't. Cause it's fast. And then he has like bigger arms and you think, you know, for a rat. Yeah. He's got, he's got monkey arms for a rat. It's very weird. The more I think of it, it's like, it's very creepy. Um,
00:19:47
Speaker
Yeah, I get why the humans don't know what to do, trying to fox with a rat. ah But it ah it kind of has that problem where like, they they explain too much. And by doing that, it ruins the whole like mystique because it's like, it's not like he was an Asian rat. You know, yeah, he just found shit in the sewer and just decided to become Asian. yeah is is just that It's what's like Tony Shalhoub. Yeah.
00:20:16
Speaker
So this is all sorts of weird in that sense, because I'm like, at least the original one, the original comic was he was the Asian, he was ah a pet to Orokusaki, not Orokusaki, but um yeah other the other guy was. So he it was he was a Japanese rat that got brought to New York. Fine, right? And then in the cartoon, he was a Japanese man who got turned into a rat. Yes, fine.
00:20:45
Speaker
And then even the Jackie Chan one, I think like he wasn't Japanese. Like he didn't have like the traditional like sensei outfit. I think cause like you didn't find him. That's why it was like funny. Cause he just had shit laying around and then all the things that kept being flushed on the sewer, which just happened to be Asian shit. And he's just like, I don't know. I'm a rat. Like, whatever. Like, Oh, I have to survive. So that, yeah, the Jackie Chan splinter just learned for like, yeah, like cryo structural VHS is, and then like,
00:21:15
Speaker
Like, actual Jackie Chan movies, I think. Like, they show, like, actual Jackie Chan movie at one point. Plus, like, yeah so you probably learned language through Jackie Chan movies. So, like, you know, like, that's how he got the way he is. This Tony Shalhoub rat makes no sense. Like, he every turtle sounds like different turtles, like, different accents from, like, California, like, New York. You know, mostly California. I think Mikey and Raph have, like, maybe Raph is New York.
00:21:43
Speaker
Well, Raph is, Raph is Alan Richton, Jack Reacher, which in retrospect, I'm like, Oh, that's perfect casting because Raph is the Jack Reacher of the turtles. So, and then Johnny Knoxville is Leonardo. So weird. So weird to see him like stoic sounding. Yeah. And then, yeah, I think, and then I think, um, you know, Fisher from show like, from like shameless is Michelangelo and then,
00:22:12
Speaker
Jeremy Howard, who's been in a bunch of stuff, ah is Don Tello.
00:22:20
Speaker
I do appreciate that the Turtles have sort of distinct looks. All of them have their own kind of cult of their own style. Leonardo has whatever they could find. He's got the bamboo armor. Raph has a bandana and sunglasses.
00:22:38
Speaker
Michael Andrew has like puka shells and Datto has all his tech shit because he does machines. He's wearing a Ghostbuster backpack. Yes. and and like i I do appreciate like that. but That's all shit either they made, found, or stole. But that's kind of like that's kind of like the limit of like the establishment of personalities. It's like, hey, they they wear different things. And they're different sizes. Not wrong.
00:23:05
Speaker
like, you may have done such a good great job, of like, make them all like have like unique personalities. And without without the clothes explaining it. Yeah.
00:23:18
Speaker
Because they're all I mean, I mean, yeah, I mean, yeah it's the it's the base. It's it's the most bear. It's the bare bones, like team and tea, like, like personalities, like Raf is mad. He knows a boring leader. Tell us a nerd.
00:23:32
Speaker
Mikey is a a weird pervert. oh my god I guess i guess is that one's not the traditional Mikey personality. I don't know what the hell's going on with it. like just like All Mikey does is we just constantly just hit on April. That's all he does. And she's okay with it. You figure after a while, she'll pull him aside and be like, all right, we got to talk if we're good.
00:23:54
Speaker
work together. It's, it's, it's, it's weird too, because like by the end, she's like, Oh, we're family. But then Mike is still heading on her. Cause like, he's like, April's basically like their sister or their mom. I don't, i I don't know how that works out of like they were, they were her pets. and foot like Usually yeah you are the owner of a pet. You're their parent. Yeah. So that's, I mean, that's just weird. The psychological issues going on there are,
00:24:21
Speaker
um laura hes yeah maybe and epi andedus complex yeah oipuse I get it. I don't support it, but I get it. Mm hmm. And they also did like ferns also like constantly hitting on her. It's like like Megan Foxley was to see how many scenes we can have Mango Fox feel like like wanted. Well, it's it's so weird because she she left the Transformers franchise.
00:24:51
Speaker
And there's conflicting reports of where she fired, that she would leave voluntarily. That was the whole thing. But then she came back to be on a Michael Bay movie. It's not as over the top insane as Transformers 2 or 1, where she's lying over a motorcycle or anything. But it's still like, no, there's a shot where she's leading out of the command. We'll find her looking at her ass in the opening, where she's in the trampoline class. Michael Bay's still doing it, yeah.
00:25:21
Speaker
Oh man. You can't, I remember that scene. Wait, which one? Yeah. It's like, I remember these scenes. It's like after why you start noticing it and you're like, all right, did Megan Fox has made this movie? Cause I know now she's got like a personality. He's very narcissistic, but uh, yeah, this, this movie is just the Megan Fox movie starring like the turtles. Yeah. Cause the turtles, the turtles like don't show up in like full for like probably like 30, 40 minutes.
00:25:53
Speaker
at least because you only see the barest glimpse of them and then it's like they don't show up until like that scene on the roof where they meet April. Huh. I don't know. Is that long? It's it's definitely it's it's quite a while. i mean It's got to be at least 30 minutes, and if not like close to 40, 45 minutes. there's Because they they stop that like subway hostage situation where the Foot Clan are trying to like lure them out. but It's like, well we'll we'll take hostages. They'll have to come out. And then they get their ass kicked.
00:26:23
Speaker
What a bad plan. It's like, hey, let's just pick a random subway in the hopes that they will arrive in time. They've also they they've they've seen them like ah toss like ah shipping containers. like They're like like a toy. So it's like, yeah, let's lure these like unknown, super strong vigilantes into like the subway. We're basically the foot plan to have but Bad tactical advantage. Yeah. And then, um, yeah, they should have brought like a mech suit or something. Well, they they should have outfitted an army full of, um, like shredder suits. Yeah. Why did, yeah. Why did sex make it like them? Like just, ah or at least give them some sort of like, you know, tech weapon, like, uh, yeah. Get the lasers or something you like yeah arm gauntlets or something. Yeah. Give Karai something like crickets or ass kicks.
00:27:20
Speaker
Karai should be, like, in a hospital body cast. She gets pounded into a wall. She gets slammed by, like, a raft, I think, into a wall. A raft is the biggest turtle, but is it is like a bulletproof shell that slams her into a wall.
00:27:38
Speaker
shake ah russia all right Yeah, she she never gets like like you you think she would have like some sort of like fight with like one of them like Leonardo or something But like she's does it but she's like in the Jeep like she doesn't like fight any of them directly Yeah, I I really said even in the sequel. She doesn't fight the turtles directly anymore. Yeah, I Also saw the sequel right after this Well, I mean, the sequels is like so much better than this first one. Because because they went because they went, they finally went, they went like, oh, they realized like we should go full cartoon in the set like, you know, bebop, Rocksteady, Casey Jones, Krang, Baxter Stockman, like an actual turtle van. They embraced it.
00:28:30
Speaker
Which is weird because you figure, OK, you're doing a whole reboot series, embrace the fandom, embrace like the stuff that the fans came to love, but it's like, yeah, no and Megan Fox Megan Fox is what we're going to embrace now. Look how cool she is. And a, and a, and a, a Mecca like a transformer shredder. So disappointed who I don't, I don't even understand like how the physics work or like he shoots blades out and they even just fly back somehow like magnets. I guess. Yeah. Yeah. But he has to get unlimited, like, like unlimited supply of them.
00:29:03
Speaker
ah No, I think it's limited because he has to recall them. Yeah. I do. I do appreciate that he says at one point, like ah tonight I die into into turtle soup. Yeah. Like, dar there did did you do you drop some like, you know, turtle, like classic turtle lines in there, like sprinkled in there.
00:29:24
Speaker
But yeah, it's definitely the first one is definitely not as much as like, uh, like a fans fan service or like ah but trying to appeal to fans is like the second one. and
00:29:36
Speaker
Uh, yeah, I think they were trying to be hip. Like the market was weird because I feel like, well, I mean, i mean was one third of this movie is just marketing material between Dunkin Donuts Pizza Hut. And um I saw another brand in there. I don't think there's only just a car deals or anything. No. And the next one they do. Yeah. I think you get like a car deal for this one.
00:30:04
Speaker
Yeah, definitely Pizza Hut is definitely like, there's like a a full, there's an entire scene where Splinter tries, is like teasing them with Pizza Hut. Here's the insane thing. It's like, why make a fake pizza for the scene? Yeah. Like, shouldn't they just do some sort of like- What was it? It was like the pizza with like 99 cheeses on it or something? Yep. Mm-hmm. It's like the 99 cheese pizza, and then it's like, he got to three toppings, three cheeses, and then Mikey broke. Yeah. Can you imagine they actually try if they actually made like a,
00:30:34
Speaker
are they Are there even 99 cheeses you could put on a pizza? I think maybe there's 50 good pizzas because like you put cream cheese on a pizza. Yeah. It's a good pizza. Some cheese won't melt. so it's like some cheese no some cheese ah Most cheeses will melt. It's just yeah high temperature. So you have to cook this pizza at different degrees at different points to like melt the cheese. You know what I mean? it's just They should try to pre-melt it.
00:31:01
Speaker
they They should have tried to make like one, like they had to have a contest. something like and We're gonna make one of these like 99 cheese pizzas. And then like, yeah you have to be the first one to like this New York City, like pizza butt or something. I'm just thinking like, can you make a 99 cheese pizza? I have to look on like YouTube. Like there's all there's those guys that like make like the the food from like TV shows. Like someone trying to make a 99 cheese pizza for Turtles 2014.
00:31:28
Speaker
Okay. I looked it up online in 2014. Someone in Australia did attempt to make a 99 cheese pizza. Oh man. Okay. It is an article about it. And, um,
00:31:41
Speaker
Yeah, someone did it as a stunt. They saw TNT in theaters like us yep and had exactly this conversation. And then he credited the movie. And then, yeah, because it has so much fucking cheese on it, Zach, it's a white pizza. Essentially, there's no sauce. It's just cheese sauce.
00:32:04
Speaker
ah Johnny D. Francesco, an Australian chef, made ah the 99 Cheese Pizza. And I'm not sure if it's good or not, because I think it's just so much nonsense flavors at that point.
00:32:22
Speaker
Yeah, i think I think it's like the only, like it's the only time, only like big pizza promotion in this movie. And it was not even like a real pizza. No, there's usually a flashback where like they do like a um they're quite like, you know, it's kind of the pizza that like it flops on like sort of his head with like little turtles. I mean, the marketing for it was kind of crazy because it's like, oh, this is the pizza that like rodents and reptiles love. Pizza Hut. I can't remember what if they did like because I know in from you may have to did like the it's like each turtle gets their own pizza. i think they I think they did something like that for this one.
00:33:02
Speaker
where it's like, it's like Raph is always like, it's like 10 meats, Raph likes meats. Like, you know, he likes veggies cause he's boring.
00:33:21
Speaker
But yeah, but, uh, anyway, so yeah, after, so after, uh, I was like, One of the things I'm trying to figure out is like, how did they find, um, but like turtles lair? and I think it was, did they use her cell phone? Yeah. Okay. Yes. The cell phone. I thought, I thought at first it was like the business card that like Saks gives her. It's like, Hey, call me. We'll figure this out. but It's like, it seemed like they had like a microchip in or something to like tracker, but yeah, I guess it was a cell phone, but he does that to everyone. Cause he didn't know April will be useful until way later. Yeah.
00:33:58
Speaker
um It's he they say it really quick in a throwaway line. They're like, all right Let's we're pinging the cell phone and it's like now let's converge on it like they try triang Yeah, and then they have like but they have like Dark Knight style like like ah echo like it's just like they see like the x-ray of like the lair Basically, they could see like they're able to map it out I don't know if that's like a real thing they saw or that was just like the cool Michael Bay visual to say Oh, this is what we think a ping effect is.
00:34:27
Speaker
Oh But yeah, but that's like what it would be like overloaded. If her phone was paying that much where it was happening on a room, her battery would be drained. Yeah. And like, no one else has like, uh, turtles don't have cell phones, I don't think. Maybe they do. Donnie probably does. Donnie is like, is loaded with tech. But, uh, yeah, one of the biggest, one of the biggest sequences is the, yeah, the Foot Clan attacks the lair.
Raph's Rescue Mission
00:34:52
Speaker
Um, and it's like shockingly, all the turtles get captured, except for Rav.
00:34:59
Speaker
And it so then it becomes, it basically becomes like a Raph solo movie for like a little bit. Cause it, ah when did the last rodent come out? Cause I feel like this, like, there's a little bit of like a mamash, like last rodent where it's like Raph picks up all the weapons of the other turtles and like puts them on his like gel.
00:35:14
Speaker
2016? So maybe, that'd be so weird to inspire, like, like Kevin Eastman was like inspired by this, like, Hey, that's a good idea. I wonder if there was one turtle that had to carry on. All the weapons. everywhere Yeah. Yeah. It'd be the best out of all of them.
00:35:29
Speaker
Really sad story. But I can't wait for the last run and shit. like Take it the series to a whole new direction. Yeah, we're getting that God of War style game soon, I think.
00:35:45
Speaker
But yeah, Raph is definitely like the star of this movie, I think. That's where the turtles go. It's like Raph and April are the stars. you You figured the Leonardo just because he has that like, oh, it's so hard to be the leader in front of these people. But no, Raph, actually, the like beginning of the third act is pretty cool because it's like Raph and he has to figure out how to do all things. And then he has to bully his way to fake upstate New York. Yeah. Well, they barely get into like the like Leonardo Raph like fight like it's like they have like one scene of like
00:36:23
Speaker
Oh, you're always you always got to be the leader or whatever. And then that's it. They don't really get into that at all. Well, I guess because this movie is packed with so much plot. You can't have that at this point. Yeah. Well, then they had like the crazy like, oh, like the emotional ending of like they're like, they're going to die. So they're all confessing stuff. And like rap has like his big like emotional speech about how he loves his brothers.
00:36:47
Speaker
Yeah. Good scene. Like it. There are moments that I feel like the writer really was going through something. the thing like Really wrote like a real well like spoken dialogue scene that should not be in this TMMT movie. Mm hmm. Because it really like makes it dramatic. Like they're all talking about nonsense on the way down and then rafters like, all right, well, let's have some group therapy. Yeah.
00:37:16
Speaker
I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I was a bully. Like ah i push you guys because I was scared. I was scared that it was going to be good enough. Tough guy. Don't cry. Yeah.
00:37:30
Speaker
But yeah, the whole, yeah, but yeah the whole rat, like raff, like, uh, breaking into the, breaking into the, uh, sex estate and then, um, freaking all the other, ah like he's fighting shredders and then, uh, he's losing it, but then, uh,
00:37:46
Speaker
April, April injects all the other turtles, like adrenaline, like over an overdose of adrenaline. And then it's basically they're on a cocaine. but but I don't think like that replaces blood. ah soon know the also but up blood Yeah. But then they would just fall asleep. Like, I think you'll be hyper, but then eventually you'll crash, which they never do. At this point on the movie from them, a lack of blood, they don't eat, they're not drinking anything. And then they're not making more blood. You know, like it's sort of like,
00:38:15
Speaker
You should be passed out. You all lost like pints of blood, maybe like. Quite a bit. I mean, quite to fill a canister, at least two canisters. Yeah.
00:38:29
Speaker
And then, yeah, and then sex is whole plan is that he he's going to his shredder going to unleash a virus, like a toxin on New York kill. Like, I forgot, if like 3,000 people or like it's like some sort of like insane amount of people in New York City.
00:38:46
Speaker
But then he's going to swoop in with the cure that he's going to use, that he's going to use, uh, based on the mutagen and savor, like save whoever's left. And then he'll be like his company of like, uh, he says sell it to the government or like he's a sell it. It's like a ah a cure. And then it's going to be able to make money. But then also like sp forever, but then also shredder will take over the city.
00:39:10
Speaker
I guess it would be their rule. So it's like, Hey, you made the pharmaceutical thing. So now you can, you can rule Manhattan, you New York, like, yeah, ah which I don't think that only it works that way. I like the government's going to like, let you like, Oh, you saved that. You save people. Like it's your city now. Go ahead. yeah like You police it now. Like the pharmacy company will now dictate the fire department, the transportation compartment, this, this, this fire pursuit company and this army of mercenaries are going to run New York City. yeah Ninja mercenaries. Yeah.
00:39:39
Speaker
supposed ninja mercenaries are now going to tell you um when the trains are going to run. So yeah, that's not a very well thought out plan. But um that is that is the plan.
Snow Mountain Chase Scene
00:39:55
Speaker
And then yeah know we we get that we get that whole crazy snow mountain chase that we were talking about earlier with like where they're like blowing up. They're like hitting Jeeps and make them fly. Like it's Vernon, Vernon is driving it like a tractor trailer down a mountain. And then the turtles like are sliding behind the truck trailer on their shells. I mean, it was cool. Again, it's cool. It's ski just, yes does it doesn't make sense for the rest of the movie. I just wish it didn't come out of the left field just for like the fit in. Cause I get it. Uh, the, the,
00:40:34
Speaker
whatever the evil compound was, cause it was a mansion slash lab slash like transportation depot. Yeah. Slash like ninja, ninja, uh, dojo because we're shorter. Ninja dojo there. Yeah. So a lot was going on in that area. So they just made it snowy and for miles, no, no, nothing, just mountain top range. Mm-hmm.
00:40:59
Speaker
Oh, only that's nearest that is that sewer access that will lead you to Manhattan faster than a helicopter. Yeah, yeah because they get there. They get there. Basically, the exact same time is like, sex gets back to New York City. And they're like, like, he's like, he's like pumping the music just starting to do the mutagen. And like, they're like, hey, we're we're back. We found you. like And then we get like, yeah, April april and Vern had to fight sex and then The turtles have to fight Shredder. The turtles get their asses beaten by Shredder for most of that fight. It's pretty funny just because they have no strategy and it takes them three rounds to figure that out. They have to remember that childhood game they played, Buck Buck. That's the key to everything.
00:41:48
Speaker
where you basically attack one at a time, but um, progressive you can progressively be higher. That's the that's the strategy. that schder is like you He's unable to stop. yeah but Okay, so that makes sense to an enemy that has mostly a ground game. So his weakness is like air attacks, but Shredder has homing missiles. like He has homing knives. yeah so Air attacks are meaningless. He can still like throw things and he can still... like He'll let you attack up because he's got like an arm's length of knives. He's got Wolverine claws and like yeahp flying knives. He wants you to air attack. He's got like he's got like predator blades, and then he has the and he is but he like he like also like spread out his knife throwing knives and has those too.
00:42:41
Speaker
ah he's he's a walking blender so yes like that's fine like you I don't know like later on I guess it's like the trolls aren't ready to fight your Transformer
00:42:54
Speaker
Yeah. And the suit itself has so many questions because if you remember the beginning of the movie when you see Oroki Saki as the just regular like man. Yep. And he is like seven feet tall or more like he's a giant man one finger is like six one like he's not short. So um,
00:43:18
Speaker
I'm thinking Rokusaki to be a head taller is like seven something. And then he puts on the mech suit to become easily like nine feet tall. Right? He's bigger than the turtles at least. Yeah. And I think April says the turtles are six foot, like they're always like six foot tall at least. So so yeah, I'm just thinking like, all right. Then he gets thrown off a roof and survives.
00:43:48
Speaker
Yeah, yeah, yeah, he's thrown off a skyscraper um I guess I guess because the mutagen like He got a little bit of the mutagen on him and then like that like healed him or like kept him from dying Which I don't mean the sequel sort of just says hey, this is shredder just go with it. He's he's Brian T now He's not a but he's ah a giant bald man anymore And he's just so much better like shredder looking than the mech suit. Yeah
00:44:19
Speaker
ah So, yeah, I mean, it has its moments because honestly, I do like the the camaraderie between the turtles, the dialogue where they make fun of each other or they're like off on their like row ship. So it's like, you know, they're still like learning. I know I know a lot of people like ah point out Even though it's like so out of place against anything that's happened before, but it's like an actual like good scene of them being like goofy brothers like when they're in the elevator. They do like the they do like the like hype up rap. Yep. I enjoyed that. It's out of nowhere. It doesn't really add anything, but it's a fun like moment between them. And I guess like it's what they do before a battle.
00:45:02
Speaker
so I'm fine with it. Nothing could beat the live action 1989 or 1990 team and team movie where it's just a battle and they just go for it. And then they're just these poor stuntmen and rubber suits are throwing themselves around. Yeah. This, however, is just like so much CGI things are going on.
00:45:28
Speaker
ah Sometimes it's followable. Sometimes it's a cool like, okay, you could see the action like this is too hard to film in real life. So they can in this cartoon sequence. Yeah, this this action is definitely better than like the like Transformers movies, at least like, because Michael Bay, like just puts like the camera, it's like the cameras in like Megatron's armpit. And he has to look through like his like, like arm is like through like his like circuitry to like, and then you see that this prime like barely coming at him or something. It's like that.
00:45:56
Speaker
the The Transformers actually is such so horribly, especially in the last like last couple movies. We're just like incoherent nonsense. ah You saw the Beast Wars one, right? I mean, that would i mean now it's not Michael Bay, so it's it's better. Oh, I see. Yeah, bum but Bumblebee and Rise of the Beasts are both like way better than anything of the last like last like four Transformers movies or whatever. I still gotta see them.
00:46:25
Speaker
Dark in the moon is like, I mean, it's way too fucking long, but that's like the last, like halfway decent one. And then every, all the other ones that are just like like, just like brain hurting garbage. It's like, where it's like you're actually feeling yourself get stupid or watching them. You're here folks. Zach says brain rotting garbage. for michael bay Yeah. You want, you want to simulate like, what it like if you've got a concussion or you want to give your brain like a, a concussion for the movie, like yeah watch the last night or whatever.
00:47:06
Speaker
But yeah, this one yeah this one's this one's fine. The sequel is definitely so much better just because of like, yeah, it it leads so much more into like the cartoons that like work just like our tune. And yeah, like, yeah, it's all all a bunch of characters you actually want to never been to move before. They finally showed up like beep up and rock steady, crying and all that stuff. So I know like Netflix, I watched I watched this movie on Netflix and it was like, hey, let's immediately play the second one. I was like, all right, you got it. and So when I was watching this back to back, it was a great time. um You know, kill two and a half hours was watching this. I learned a lot about my love of TV and tea.
00:47:53
Speaker
Uh, I know I'm like a snob where I will say the first two live action movies are really hard to top. Um, this is better than the third movie. Oh yeah. Yeah. Third movie is just like, I don't know. Third movie, you gotta be in the mood to watch that one and really enjoy it. That's in the like, so bad it's good category. Like yeah its it's absolutely terrible. like All the concept of time travel, you know me, I like time travel things. However, I mean, TMMT time traveled.
00:48:23
Speaker
We were closer to early times, yeah. or Somehow in Japan they made a magic lamp. Doesn't explain how it's made, does, it's just a scepter. um No one does it anything good with it, and it's just there. and And nothing changed historically that these like four samurai guys like learned all about like the modern world and came back.
00:48:47
Speaker
Well, they're realistic. they They went to the future. Then they go back and then it's like, we're going to do that. What do you do with that knowledge? Like they learn nothing. Well, they basically just learn how to like party with Casey. That's all I did. Basically, he's like, took them raig hey, you guys want to hang out? Like, well, people forget, like, samurai is as noble as they are. They're not educated like that. You know what I mean? Like their whole focus was like battle and poetry.
00:49:13
Speaker
and then maybe like, had to respect your local governor. So when they have none of that, no safeguards, like, yeah, all they want to do is just drink beer and fight. And then learn hockey.
00:49:31
Speaker
ah Yeah, man, samurai's aren't that great. But yeah, do you remember the soundtrack to this movie? Cause it will remind you at the end. Like 2014 one, I, well I bet you didn't mention the intro, but yeah, like that, that, that end credits song, like shell shock. It's like, knock, knock. You're about to get your shell shock. I appreciate how stupid it is in the, it's like referencing the movie. Like it's like, it's like a, it's like a throwback to like, you know, like turtle power by stepping down as good as turtle power or like a ninja rap or anything.
00:50:03
Speaker
So I forgot how weird that song was because it caught me off guard because it's not like it's used a lot of the movie. So it's never, it's never, just never I don't think it's ever used. It just it's just it's explodes there in the cringe. You're like, wait, what the hell is this? Yeah. Yeah. So it's like, oh man, I forgot about this. They don't even, they don't even start playing it in like their like, um, proto turtle van at the end. They're playing like happy together. Yup. They're playing a turtle song.
00:50:28
Speaker
Cause like, cause like dying, dying like measures all the like, um, well we got the pose, we got supposed speakers and everything. And it's like, you think that like, yeah, blast like your, your Wizz Khalifa like rap theme, but no, they, they play literally the turtles made yeah happy forever. So I'm like, Oh, yep that's clever. Um, and it's, it's, ah it's, it's so weird. to Like that, that, that like van at the end is also like, like, it feels like a go-kart compared to like the actual like van they get the second one.
00:50:59
Speaker
The second one was a garbage truck. Yeah. But it's like how, like that that that one at the end of this movie like feels like so small. It's like how, and you see how huge the turtles are in this movie. It's just like, how are you all fitting in there? Like it's not being cramped. Like it's just like, it's, it's like, uh, it's like a, like a delivery van or something that they've chopped. I think, um, when they go in, they have to be in their shell. Maybe. Yeah.
00:51:28
Speaker
Because it rolls up and you're like, wait, is this like a go-kart? Like it's the turtle cart? It's a clown car. Yeah.
00:51:40
Speaker
i Any thoughts about how they could have improved this movie? um I mean, well, I think that i mean the second one did the improvements. It's like, yo, have more.
00:51:57
Speaker
more characters for the cartoon and make it more like appeal to fans and not have then ah kind of like lean away from like this the weird origin stories that like they created and some of the Michael Bayness. Yeah, I'm about the same way. I kind of prefer TMNT movie that is Turtle First and then Mention April. um This was like an April movie that happens to have turtles like come in. Yeah.
00:52:24
Speaker
I mean, were we're definitely, we're definitely in a very good spot now with like mutant mayhem. That's like their, you know, current turtles. I still gotta see this TV show. I heard the TV shows. I mean, I mean, we're recording this. It's not even out yet. So people now, now it's out for hearing this, but we're in the past and we haven't, it's not out we yet, but, um, I think it's getting good reviews at the time of recording this. So, um, I think I read, I read it's a little bit more like,
00:52:49
Speaker
younger skewing even than like the movie was. So it might be like it's more like a kid's show, but apparently it's all their problems with hugs. Maybe I don't know. But I think I read there's still some like fun stuff for turtles fans too. So I'm definitely gonna check it out. So boy, I like that. I like to hear that.
00:53:08
Speaker
but Yeah, a weird, a weird, a weird time in the, uh, the world of turtles where there's like this like, these gritty, roided out monsters were the turtles for like, what, two years? Cause like it was 2014 was this movie and 2016 was the next movie.
00:53:28
Speaker
But yeah, they're they're stronger than ever now with like E.M.A.M. and all the other stuff that's going on. So turtles the turtles will never die.
Podcast Conclusion and Preview
00:53:40
Speaker
And yeah, so they'll they'll wrap this week ah for Turtles 2014. Next week, we're going to be talking about Alien vs. Predator, which is celebrating its 20th anniversary next week. And it also kind of ties into bring a new alien movie, Alien Romulus, which will hopefully kind of bring the franchise back to like you know its a you alien alien roots. But we're talking about the the really the the create the weird, crazy battle that ah people wanted it for years and then totally disappointed everyone. Yeah, people still wanted it. It was Freight vs. Jason, and it was Alien vs. Predator. Those were the two things people wanted to see. And ah both both ah both kind of disappointed people after like how much I built up there was to do those movies. But then somehow saw the Alien vs. Predator got a sequel.
00:54:39
Speaker
But we're we're talking about the first one. um And, you know, the crazy Antarctic, Antarctic trading ground for the predators, all that stuff next week. So come back for that. And, uh, however, say we all, but all sorts of news, reviews, trailers. Um, I got a review of the new M Night Shyamalan movie, Trap. If you want to read my review of that, it's up on the site. We've got, uh, all of our, we got trailers, we got news, we got, uh, commentaries up there. You can listen to our commentary from last month, which is Superman four.
00:55:07
Speaker
quest for peace we're going to have a new one up soon this month as well so check all that stuff up on this over the site and yeah so of course I'm Zach and we will see you next week for more for everything action head to www.everythingaction.com you can also find us on facebook at facebook dot.com slash everything dot.action and follow us on x at evaction we're also on instagram and threads at everything.action Find more episodes of the podcast on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, or your at podcast app of choice, and be sure to rate and subscribe.