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Episode 6 - 1993 NL Expansion Part 2 - Florida
80 Plays2 years ago
Part 2 of our retrospective on National League Expansion in 1993. The Dutch Mafia, Dante Bichette's preternatural fascination with Bo Jackson, more fried birds, and WAYNE F'ng HUIZENGA, Drain the swamp with us as we explore the Florida Marlins on The Whole Ballgame
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Transcript
Baseball and Universe Expansion
00:00:04
Speaker
expansion. See, it's like anything else. The expansion of baseball, like the universe, is inevitable. Today, after handling Colorado's half of the 1993 expansion equation, we head to the swamp, and we intend to drain it.
Florida Marlins and Wayne Huizenga
00:00:23
Speaker
There, we're bound to find an array of creatures, but none quite as fascinating as Wayne fucking Heizinga. It's Florida Marlins baseball right here on the whole ball game. K. Tall, bonifacio. You put some fucking respect on that name, you son of a bitch. How you doing, buddy? We'll, uh, we'll determine whether or not the respect is necessary as we
00:00:48
Speaker
We go along our merry way this week. Been a minute since we've talked to each other and to you friends.
Personal Banter and Humor
00:00:59
Speaker
I had a sick kid. Fuck you, you'll get your shit when you get it.
00:01:06
Speaker
Did the child have some, um, past due meet from the leftover baloney blowout you had a couple of weekends back? It's true. Yeah. Bobby's close relatives came up. We had a hell of a time in the basement.
00:01:20
Speaker
Well, I think Marvin, Marvin must have caught wind and he was, he was up in wherever between Northwest Indiana and wherever you are now. Have you ever had a turkey gizzard, deep fried and Coca-Cola? Oh, if you haven't, you haven't lived, Blakers. Oh, bonifacio. Oh, delicious.
00:01:44
Speaker
Now, what was it you said last week, Marvin, that if you dip a turkey in something other than itself, it becomes something better than itself, I believe it was? That's right. When you dip any bird in a hot liquid, it becomes something greater than itself. I think we could probably do four to five hours on that thesis statement alone.
00:02:13
Speaker
Um, if we had to, but when we, when we started the Patreon, that's where we'll go. That was something maybe back in the old college days, could have busted out and bullshitted a 25 page paper out of, but, uh, just for some clarity. Do it at 8 AM and you start at midnight. That's the way to do it. Uh-huh. Exactly. Yeah.
00:02:33
Speaker
playing too much NBA Live all night. Just for some clarity, because you've called me Bonifacio twice here, so the people know what's going on. We were discussing either Spanish or per verse, one of the two, and then we got onto it and I told you about my
00:02:51
Speaker
one of my Spanish teachers in high school and how I suspected that he was a diddler. And the name that he gave me for their class was Bonifacio because I had no literal translation of my real name. Yeah, we got on the subject because I mentioned that as we were discussing the 1997 Florida Marlins before we jumped on the air, we talked about Moises Salhu and as a result of it. Moises was my Spanish class name in high school.
00:03:22
Speaker
Got through Spanish one, two, three, and four with solid C pluses. So I'm pretty proud of myself for that. Hey, that's not too bad. Yeah. What are you going to do? I, I took some German myself. Javel. I bailed on the Spanish, but, um, Danke. The Germans, big fans of dipping shit and other shit too. So taking shits on people's chests, I think there's that as well. I suppose, uh, shit everywhere.
00:03:52
Speaker
Yeah, it takes time to expand is what we're trying to say. That's it. That's, that's it. Uh, we, uh, we did quite a deep dive into the Colorado side of things last time. And, and this time we had, uh, as I alluded to in the intro, we head to the deep South. South Florida as it would have it, the swamp itself. Um, yeah, we.
Florida's Cultural Context and Marlins
00:04:19
Speaker
We saw what it looked like in the Rockies and today we're going to take a look at what it looked like down in the great mistake of the United States.
00:04:32
Speaker
the swampland, the homeland of Skinner himself, the Everglades, was it the Everglades that were Skinner's from? Right? That's correct. Yep. Sounds of crickets. And yeah, so we're gonna look at the Marlins today and the actual draft itself, a little bit of the actual the proceedings and who was taken and when and where and
00:04:59
Speaker
and what that looked like and how that all shook out. Probably won't get terribly in depth into the draft, but because we'll be looking at the teams themselves the next two weeks. So we'll get into that as we do, but that's kind of what's on the agenda for today, I believe. Before we get too deep, I'll throw an email that we got over the little break we had here from our old Hal Dirty Don.
00:05:30
Speaker
There he is. I wanted to follow up after the episode on the Colorado Rockies expansion. First, the Rockies have been and continue to be a draw, no matter how God awful the team is. Coors Field has packed 81 dates a year. Yeah, we covered all that, Don. I don't know what you're trying to get to here. We're out here wide open, dude, and you're coming at us like this, brother. What the fuck? I just don't know what to think.
00:05:55
Speaker
The combination of a beautiful downtown ballpark and the fantastic weather in the summer in Colorado. Yeah, you know, 300 days of sun in Colorado in Denver every year. It's the sunniest place in the United States. Really? Yeah. Yeah. My, uh, my cousins live out there and I got a couple of friends as well. And they, they like to rub that in my face pretty often.
00:06:15
Speaker
Sunnier than the Sunshine State, Florida? It's true. Yes, sir. 300 days of sunshine. Um,
Critique of Rockies and Monforts
00:06:21
Speaker
second, the Monfort's have to be one of, if not the worst owners in all the professional sports. The franchise had some success from 2000. Well, if I had been around, I'll tell you right now, I would have made that team, my, my, the greatest thing that's ever happened to Colorado. It'd also be known as the Colorado pterodactyls.
00:06:42
Speaker
I do appreciate a bird, boy. This was attributed to Kelly McGregor, the team president from 2001 to 2010. Oh, the franchise had some success from 2007 to 2012 or so. This was attributed to Kelly McGregor, the team president from 2001 to 2010. He was instrumental in assembling players such as Todd Hilton.
00:07:02
Speaker
Uh, rest in peace, Troy to Lewicki gone too soon, Carlos Gonzalez, Dexter Fowler, and Nolan Arenado, uh, formerly of also your St. Louis Cardinals, correct?
00:07:13
Speaker
Uh, yes, yes. Those men are dead. Are we? No, they're not. Uh, but you know, uh, unfortunately Kelly might as well be is what you're saying. Unfortunately, Kelly McGregor died in his hotel room unexpectedly in 2010. You can see a downward spiral in the franchise since some notable things they did in this time. Fired Jim Tracy as manager who was pretty successful and hired Walt Weiss.
00:07:39
Speaker
Walt Weiss was a former Rockies player. I am familiar with the Walt Weiss gentleman that he talks of. Um, uh, but his coaching experience included being the coach at Regis high school and all boys private school, uh-oh, in Denver for a couple of years. Uh, did you mention all boys school? USA.
00:08:02
Speaker
Do bring me my uniform. I'm going to blend in with the school anyway. Wesley, do bring me my Regis. Hey, Mr. Belvedere. It's my Regis boy school. Come on in, buddy. Who'd have thought Walt Weiss and Lynn Belvedere getting along so famously. I believe Walt was the, uh,
00:08:32
Speaker
I'm correct. The 1988 American League rookie of the year as well. I, that could very well be, but that's, I, I know I'm from the baseball cards that I collected. That's pretty much it. Um, but that was enough to make a manager of the Rockies. And as you can guess, he was horrible. Then the death blow for me as a fan, uh, says Donnie, uh, was the giveaway of Nolan Aronado. Nolan Aronado was the best Rockies player of all time. It worked out pretty well for me. Sure did.
00:09:01
Speaker
Uh, best Rockies player of all time. I guess it's between him or Todd Hilton, but I think Nolan is better. These assholes actually paid the Cardinals to take a hall of fame caliber third baseman in his prime. They received a replacement level pitcher and some mid-level prospects who have it handout in return. In 2023, the Rockies had their worst season in franchise history. Again, Donny had you listen to the episode. Uh, we covered, uh, their, their, their bad season this year. So pay more attention, but keep the emails coming.
00:09:30
Speaker
Yeah, I would echo those sentiments. There's a couple things in there. First being Todd Helton, a University of Tennessee alumni, also friends with Peyton Manning. So it makes me wonder, because as they were both quarterbacks there, did Todd have the same zest for putting his butthole on people's faces? Unwellingly, like a
00:09:59
Speaker
wanting like Peyton did. Well, I think, I think when you're breaking down the did he or didn't he, you have to take the entire scope of the situation and, and, and break it down, uh, instance by instance, right? I think a big part of that is, Hey, like in that moment, did he have a penis where his butthole was? Oh, okay. Um, that's true. I didn't even think of that. So I'm glad you brought that up. Cause that really,
00:10:30
Speaker
That's a whole nother ballgame there. I guess. But secondly, and probably more importantly, I guess, probably. Yeah. So, you know, at the beginning there talked about how you could basically still draw and have a shitty franchise and and these these.
00:10:56
Speaker
These owners now, these men that own these ball clubs, I was watching some old, I'm trying to think what year it was, but anyways, sometime back in the 80s and it was just like such a different mentality of these guys going for it and trying to actually win and have the best teams.
00:11:23
Speaker
And it wasn't about figuring out how to, you know, it's like everything else, be as predictable as you can and make as much predictable money as you can and try to do as good as you can, but you're not going to go all the way for it. And, you know, they just, they got to get their however many wins now to get into the playoffs and they just take your best shot from there and maybe trade for a guy and fuck it.
00:11:53
Speaker
It's, it's, it's, it's no longer about the game and winning the game. So that's why the game is worse off and worse to watch. And, and we're essentially, we're watching businesses being operated. Um, and that's not fun. It's not exciting. It's not like that. That's, that's their objective and their mentality and their, the thing they're out to do. And that's what we're seeing.
00:12:22
Speaker
and we're wanting to see baseball, but we're seeing fucking efficiencies and spreadsheets and play out on a baseball diamond. Well, it's interesting, right? Like I just, to kind of illustrate exactly what you're talking about, I pulled up Todd Helton's Wikipedia as you were talking. By the way, what's Todd Helton's middle name? Wesley. Or is it Lynn? Todd Lynn Helton. Todd Lynn Helton.
00:12:52
Speaker
I'm going to read this real quick just to back up Donny's point about him being maybe the best Colorado Rocky of all time. But he started playing in 97, retired in 2013. He's one of the guys that kind of post 94, maybe belonged pre 94, right? In terms of his work ethic and the kind of baseball player he was.
00:13:19
Speaker
Um, let's see here. He played his entire 17 year career for the Colorado Rockies, five time all star, four times silver slugger, three time gold glove winner holds the Rockies club records for hits, home runs, doubles, walks, run, scored RBI games, played total bases among others and goofy face. Yeah. He's got a face. There's no question about it.
00:13:43
Speaker
God damn softball size, Adam's apple. Indeed. And he, uh, rocks that goatee as if, uh, that's the right thing to do. Look, uh, being, being the best Rocky ever is like being the tallest midget. Okay. That's nicest guy in prison. It's fine. Congratulations. Uh, each season from 99 to 04 Helton met or exceeded all the following totals, 320 batting average 39 doubles, 30 home runs, 107 runs scored 96 RBI.
00:14:13
Speaker
577 slugging percentage of 981 on base plus slugging. In 2001, the batting title with a 372 average also led MLB with a 698 slugging percentage 59 doubles and 147 RBI and led the National League with 216 hits. Helton collected his 2000 career hit in 2009 and his 2500th. In his last season, September of 2013.
00:14:41
Speaker
Anyway. Yeah. Uh, it says here Helton attended central high school in Knoxville, Tennessee was a letterman in football and baseball. And in football, he posted 2,772 yards as quarterback and 14 assholes to faces. There it is. Yep. There you go. Glad we could figure that out and suss out the stats on that. I was, I was satisfied with that conclusion. Thank you. What, where are we at now? What are we doing?
00:15:09
Speaker
I suppose we should probably email, right? Yeah. So yeah, emails good to go. Uh, thank you, Don, again, for reaching out and contributing to the show as per usual. You should probably pick a new team. I'm not going to lie to you. Probably. It's not going to get any better. And I will tell you this, you know, and, and I guess, fuck you for this. Cause they, they were part of the, I, the 2007 world series and playoffs where we were an absolute travesty to watch because
00:15:39
Speaker
My NLCS was the Rockies and the Diamondbacks. Two teams for the same division, even. Same division. God, it sucks so bad. It fucking sucks hard. I mean, it's been two weeks since we talked last. And obviously we have a World Series champion in the inaugural championship in Texas, which is cool. That's great. Rangers won the
00:16:03
Speaker
won the thing and the Diamondbacks didn't, but- They kept their bungles, Todd Gabe, and they were awarded with a championship. They listened to you, Nolan, and more people should listen to you, including George Brett.
2023 World Series and Expansion Details
00:16:15
Speaker
But ultimately, I think the thing that's most interesting about the situation here is exactly what we keep talking about. Lowest rated World Series in the history of the World Series on television. Also known as the Arizona Effect.
00:16:32
Speaker
I think we talked about it before it even happened. I'm pretty sure we sure did. So nobody gives a shit. Nobody wanted to see that, that shit. No, that's, that's, that's the first and long list of victories we'll have. Um, so put it up on the board and don't forget it. The Randy Johnson did, uh, throw out the first pitch, I think in game four in Arizona, uh, after a, uh, some, some sort of problem in traffic on the way to the ballpark.
00:17:02
Speaker
now now here's an interesting question randy johnson now he he hit that bird and killed it now how would marvin would marvin have ran out there and scooped that bird up oh i was watching live i'll tell you oh boy i saw those feathers fly and i got good and excited you can ask my wife she was oh i said oh baby look at that bird does he that bird just unexploded it did uh would have made would have made a good uh
00:17:32
Speaker
buffalo, buffalo style bird. I'm I'm I'm good with that. Uh and and it looks like a relatively small bird. So, when you have the stringier, gamier birds, you want to, you want to use a a flavored oil. Uh one with a a lower smoke point, you know, perhaps a sesame and a sesame oil perhaps deep fry it there. Uh of course, you gotta throw it in the oven to make sure it cooks all the way through after the after the deep frying because you can't keep it in there too long because the
00:18:02
Speaker
and dry the bird out, too. That's right. Well, that's some synergy there, siding. So big units, yeah, throughout the first pitch. What I hate most about this is the fact that, like, last time we did this, my throat hurt for two days. I had to figure out how to do this voice without destroying my throat. Buckle up, buckaroo.
00:18:30
Speaker
Keep slugging down those coke's ears. Keep those pipes nice and smooth. Heartland strong, baby. Are we ready to go to Florida? Yeah, let's do it. Let's start our journey. Take us to the swamp, Blake. All right. So we will look at conversely like we did in Colorado.
00:18:52
Speaker
how we got baseball in Florida. And we once again visit the beautiful folks at Sabre and define wordsmith Stephen R. Kenny, an article from a publication known as Time for Expansion Baseball. Beautiful picture of Joe Robbie Stadium there. The National League expansion of 1993 was a long time coming
00:19:20
Speaker
The 1991 decision to add the Colorado Rockies and the Florida Marlins to the major leagues was the end of the road that began six years, three commissioners and three league presidents ago. This road began in January and there might be some dualities and some information here because, you know, we, same process, roughly same teams, but I'll try to avoid as much as I can. Um,
00:19:47
Speaker
Throat began in January, 1984, when Major League Baseball announced an eight-member committee to study the possibility, another expansion after 1977. In the fall of 1985, that's when the groups get together and present expansion proposals to a 14-owner committee. Our friend, Mr. Commissioner Peter Uberoth, who's keeping the game drug-free in 1986. Drug-free.
00:20:17
Speaker
Mm hmm. Mentioned expansion in the state of the game speech. By 1987, our friends, the U.S. Senate, the task force on expansion with Senator Tim Wirth of Colorado, as we discussed, and several senators from other states with cities that had interests. Phoenix,
00:20:42
Speaker
Arizona, Tennessee, Indiana, Ohio, Colorado, Florida, and the delegate from Washington, D.C. Doesn't mention anything of Buffalo, however, if we remember their stirring, stirring rendition. Come, come hang out in this 12,000 seat by your league stadium. It's going to be fantastic for everybody. Hey buddy, a little too close to us. So how about you go fuck off and stay out of Buffalo. This is Blue Jay country asshole.
00:21:14
Speaker
You go to fucking Florida. As other congressional groups have done in the past, this task force told MLB to either expand to more cities or lose its antitrust exemption, which we cannot have that, which protects it from being sued or broken up as an illegal monopoly, which it basically is. But anyway.
00:21:39
Speaker
The owners agreed to expand at one point, planning to increase each league to 16 teams for a total of 32. But the owners continued to stall. They conducted studies and held various rounds of presentations by competing cities and ownership groups. Some owners wanted to stall until a new collective bargaining agreement was negotiated with the players union in 1990 in order to use expansion to win other concessions.
00:22:07
Speaker
The threat of losing their monopoly was made slightly more real when a group calling itself the Professional Baseball Federation announced- Brothers. Well, you see here Gabe, what we have is a federation of professional baseball leagues. And we're going to start a new league with 1810 teams to lure current major league teams away. Stars, excuse me, not teams, eventually teams. Got that?
00:22:37
Speaker
So the professional baseball Federation is going to, it's kind of a USFL concept. Um, my good friend Donald, I believe is the, uh, the USFL will have a professional baseball Federation. Um, having faced threats to its monopoly profits from upstart leagues in Congress several times before the owners again relented in June of 1990, the national league announced that it would expand by two teams.
00:23:05
Speaker
The cities would be selected by September 91, with play to begin in 1993. In December 1990, the six finals were announced. Buffalo, Denver, Orlando, St. Pete, Tampa, Washington, Miami, as we've discussed. On June 10th, the ownership groups from Denver and Miami were announced as the winners, and they had to be approved by a vote of all owners, which required the approval of three quarters of the National League and a majority of the AL.
00:23:36
Speaker
owners and the decision becomes official on July 5th, 1991, when the owners from both leagues unanimously unanimously approved the two franchises. Our pal, our pal Jerry Reinsdorf, uh, begrudgingly so. Yeah. Jerry pops up again here later. Uh-huh. And I just don't understand what this has to do with me, Gabe.
00:24:06
Speaker
I mean. Fucking rat fuck. I mean, I'm the owner of an American League franchise and these men in the national and why are there hands in my pocket? That's what I want. It's a fair question, is it not? You tell me. Where am I wrong, Gabe? You're not wrong, sir. I'm sorry. OK, you know, Michael didn't want to play anymore. OK, what were we going to do? We got Tony Kukoch, didn't we?
00:24:37
Speaker
Uh, but the four rejected cities still wanted baseball. They wanted an ownership group to purchase an existing team and move it to town. The Houston Astros, the Cleveland Indians, and especially the Seattle Mariners. Can you imagine? We're seeing. Life imitating art there in Cleveland, huh? We're seeing as potential by, it is, it's basically, it's major league two. Or no, that's major league one. No, major league is the first one. Yeah, it's the first one. She wants to move to Miami.
00:25:07
Speaker
What the fuck do they do in the second one? Oh, that's when Doran's got the team, right? Correct, yeah. I'm getting too old, man. This also failed, but at the time, there was reason to hope. The Buffalo Group, the rich family, already owned the city's AAA bisons. So yeah, that's in the stadium and tried the buy and move tactic with the Montreal Expos in 1990.
00:25:34
Speaker
Told you buddy to stay the fuck out of Canada. God damn it. Washington mayor Sharon Pratt Kelly told the Associated Press that she would work with investors and other baseball boosters to pursue teams for sale in order to bring baseball to Washington. Well, she got that one done. Sure did. Fucking bitch.
00:25:58
Speaker
Tampa St. Pete area was especially desperate to lure an existing team since the city of St. Petersburg had just finished building a $110 million domed stadium. I believe it's a rural stadium with a roof. Yeah, that's what I heard. Yeah, it's almost exactly the same. Just put a roof on it. Yep. Since construction on what is today Tropicana Field began in the 1980s when the notion of baseball expansion was first being batted around,
00:26:26
Speaker
Missing out on the 1993 expansion was particularly painful. However, the city would get a team in the next round of expansion. The Miami franchise chose the name Florida Marlins. Marlins was chosen as an homage to the line of several minor league baseball teams that had previously called Miami home. Major league baseball hoped the ownership group would choose the... That guy sucks.
00:26:55
Speaker
Alliterative? Oh, alliterative. See, I tell you how to fuck up a word. Miami Marlins, which it thought was better for marketing and kept open the door for the next round of expansion to include another Florida city. So they didn't want them to get the monopoly on Florida there. We got to brand that shit appropriately. But the ownership group wanted to appeal to as many potential customers in the state as possible and thus decided on the Florida Marlins.
00:27:26
Speaker
this homage came with its own complications the original miami marlins were minor league team that we can play in nineteen fifty six in the international league it's first game ever saw almost fifty-year-old satchel page come out of the helicopter that landed on the field spike fucking rick flair the great american bash mhm fucking charlotte uh... is that so god we had to get some fucking head uh... yeah uh...
00:27:55
Speaker
only to go straight to the bullpen, not pitch at all that day, although he did pitch that season. The team moved to San Juan, Puerto Rico after the 1960 season. Another team called the Miami Marlins began play in the 1960s. This team with a family tree going back to the 1920s was not affiliated with the original Marlins, but adopted the mascot as an homage. As affiliations changed, this team went from the Miami Marlins to the Miami
00:28:26
Speaker
Fucking kidding me to the Miami Orioles. Marvin. Marvin, the Miami Orioles. Did you hear that? Hold on. I'm going to call him. Hold on. Yeah. We need you back. No, no, Blake. I'm going to put you on speed. Yeah. Okay. Blake, you're going to read that for me.
00:28:55
Speaker
Marvin, the second version of the Miami Marlins were also known as the Miami Orioles. Whoa. You know how I feel about my Orioles. That's why I want you back. Yes. I got to tell you, I got to tell you, I think about an Oreo and I get all sorts of excited because it's just, there's nothing quite like a well greased
00:29:24
Speaker
Well-seasoned Oreo with some wild rice on a Sunday evening in front of the television. What are you watching? No, it was Dynasty. You know, it's about me.
00:29:40
Speaker
My friend Aaron Spelling actually used, used my ranch in Colorado to run the show. It's loosely developed around my life and the life of my wife, of course. But, you know, there's less bird eating on the show for obvious reasons. You know, sometimes I appreciate an exotic bird that maybe I'm not supposed to eat, but the Oreo, what's interesting to me is there are no Oreos in Florida.
00:30:11
Speaker
Uh, to Northern bird. So why would they pick the Oreo is a mascot outside of some sort of strange homage to, uh, the, the Orioles in the North, uh, odd. Yeah. They are not native to Florida. I possibly a similar situation to your is the, uh, the.
00:30:32
Speaker
The owner of the franchise possibly enjoys an Oreo as well. You know, Ben Franklin wanted the, this, the, the national bird to be the Turkey. Oh, I think I've heard that before. Yeah, that's correct. I kind of agree with him because I'll tell you what I do appreciate a Turkey. We've talked about it on episodes in the past, of course. Uh, but, but, but I do think that an Eagle is far more delicious.
00:31:00
Speaker
The bald eagle is a boy, oh boy, gamey, very gamey. It tastes like it's been ingesting some sort of sweat sock for many years when you cook it up, but boy, you know you're eating a bird when you're eating an eagle. You ever find yourself in any trouble when you're eating that bald eagle? Son, I've been dead for 20 years. I'm not getting in any trouble. That's true.
00:31:30
Speaker
I really didn't look at it like that, Marvin. Yeah, I guess he could eat a bald eagle. Fuck it. Just delicious. I would imagine it would be, you know, it's, it's kind of like, you know, that is the Thanksgiving of my dreams. Uh, to hell with the turkeys, flip the script. National bird is the turkey and we eat eagles on Thanksgiving. That's the way to do it.
00:31:57
Speaker
I see no issues with it. I think the ego goes so much more, more perfectly with.
00:32:02
Speaker
with that green bean casserole that Susie makes every year. What's on my table, I'll tell you right now. Oh, the flavors, they meld together. That cream of mushroom soup mixed around with them green beans and those French fried onions. I know you know what I'm talking about with the French fried onion, the boy. Yes, I know. I know. Beautiful topping for snacks and things. Mm-hmm. Yes. Jesus.
00:32:31
Speaker
Thanks, Marvin. Okay, I'll see you later. Okay, bye bye. We'll call you. We need you. God, that guy smells so bad. He's been dead for 20 years. Yeah, you can smell him through the phone. It's weird. Smells like a fucking death and bald eagles.
00:32:58
Speaker
Back to the Miami Orioles and back again before becoming the Miami Miracle of the Florida State League, which was the name it played under when the Florida Marlins became a team. It was this team, the miracle that sued the new Florida Marlins in October of 1992.
00:33:17
Speaker
The miracle argued that the Florida Marlins had refused to negotiate with the miracle about the rights to the team name and the exclusive territorial rights for the Miami territory. We have territorial disputes. Eddie Graham down in Florida having problems carving up the territory. See, it's like anything else, Blake. Is that it? That's it. Okay. I didn't know if you were. Okay.
00:33:47
Speaker
It is like anything else. The miracle held exclusive rights to everything to within 35 miles of their home plate. In expanse that encompassed the new home of the Marlins, Joe Robbie Stadium, and under the master agreement between the major and minor leagues, the new Florida Marlins were supposed to compensate the miracle for the loss of those rights.
00:34:11
Speaker
At the time, the compensation for these rights was estimated to be between one and $14 million. That's kind of a, that's kind of a large span of money. Somewhere between one and 14 million. Yeah. That's, uh, you know, our early nineties, Florida money, I guess. I don't know. Everything's just a little bit more fucked up in Florida.
00:34:43
Speaker
Once the search for expansion cities became serious, Miami had been all but counted out. The rain, the heat, and the lack of fans turned off many baseball observers. That's a big one. The Miami Miracle had drawn fewer than 125 spectators per game in 1989. Miraculous. It's better in the Milan Miracle, I'll tell you that.
00:35:10
Speaker
Miami became a front runner after the South Florida Big League Baseball bidding group was chosen to represent the city's bid. What brought on this change? The deep, deep pockets of the group's owner, H. Wayne Heizenga. Who's that now? HH, dude. Bro. Wayne fucking Heizenga, you bitch.
00:35:40
Speaker
What do we know about Mr. Huizenga? Well, Mr. Huizenga agreed to pay the entire $95 million franchise fee himself.
Wayne Huizenga's Influence and Wealth
00:35:50
Speaker
And after that, everyone found reasons to support Miami's bid.
00:35:54
Speaker
Prospective professional baseball seemed to excite the city, at least a little. The miracles attendance increased to 700 per game, still well below any measure of success. And 114,000 fans went out to Joe Robbie Stadium over two nights in March of 1991 to watch the Yankees and the Orioles play. They're back.
00:36:21
Speaker
Well, what happened? Did I, did I, are you cooking, are you cooking? It's just an old ball game and the Yankees and the Orioles and down in Florida. You let me know if you find yourself in the position to be cooking an Oreo and I'll come right on back. Okay. We were just passing by the point club and yeah. Okay. Okay. All right. All right. I'll go back to sleep. Okay.
00:36:50
Speaker
Suddenly the fact that Miami was one of the nation's 20 largest television markets was a major factor. And of course, if Heizenga built it, the city's Latin and Caribbean population would come and provide a wellspring of fans. But there is little doubt that at least part of the allure of Miami's bid to the other owners was Heizenga's wealth. His net worth in the summer of 1991 was estimated between 500 and $800 million.
00:37:22
Speaker
So back when Rick Flair was leaving WCW to go to WWF, Wayne Isenga was worth somewhere around $800 million. In all, it was estimated that it would cost Isenga between 131 million and 142 million. See, that sounds like more of a range, you know? Yeah, right. That makes more sense. Yes. That's a 14 million. That's a smaller than one to 14. Um,
00:37:50
Speaker
between $131 and $142 million before the Marlins could begin play, not including his partial purchase of Joe Robbie Stadium. So he's got a piece of the stadium, okay? This included the $95 million franchise fee, about $30 or $40 million more in startup costs, about six or seven for renovations to Joe Robbie Stadium to make it baseball friendly. I think ended up spending $10 million to get the ballpark baseball ready,
00:38:18
Speaker
Compared to these, compared with these numbers, the 500,000 Huizenga spent promoting his bid to the other owners seemed paltry. And then we kind of get into some of Huizenga's background, which we'll do a little more later, but we'll touch on it here. He was born in Chicago in 1937. His Dutch born grandfather founded a garbage hauling company in 1894.
00:38:48
Speaker
So, Huizenga of Dutch descent. Ja. Is that Dutch, right? Yeah. They have wooden shoes, correct? They do. Yeah. Havel. Mm-hmm. Gabe, I've never owned a pair of fucking shoes that weren't made out of goddamn wood. And I'm a fucking tough man for it, you son of a bitch. Have you ever been to Holland, Mr. Huizenga? Holland, Michigan? What?
00:39:18
Speaker
Holland, Michigan. Have you ever been to Holland, Michigan, Mr. Hyzinga? Oh, sorry. You cut out on me. Yeah. No, I blew it. No, fuck it. No, fuck Holland, Michigan. Fuck you too. Okay. This could not have gone any better. We're fine. So his father was a cabinet maker and a home builder.
00:39:44
Speaker
Uh, the family moves to Fort Lauderdale, Florida when his angle is 15. And after dropping out of college in, is that a, that's a Santa Claus on all fours about to get butt fucked. I'm sorry. I'm sorry to derail us. I just saw it sitting right next to me. My, my wife and I found this at a garage sale.
00:40:11
Speaker
It's a Santa with his ass in the air on his tummy. Like he's, he's about to get his ass eaten. Like Derek Jeter. I'll take a picture of it and put it on the Twitter. Uh, but, uh, we, we hide this in places that the other will find it back and forth. So, uh, I just found it at my desk while we were recording. Oh, that's a good place for it. Gotcha. Made the show.
00:40:41
Speaker
Did. Did. Go on with Hizinga. Outstanding. Outstanding. That's a real cute story, asshole. Lying you and your fucking wife got your cute little bullshit. This is HH fucking time. He dropped out of college in Michigan. Oh, hey, look, Michigan. Hizinga ended up managing a family friend's three-truck garbage hauling company.
00:41:11
Speaker
I think eventually started his own trash hauling service with just one truck, which he drove in a few years, his Southern Sanitation Service, triple S dude, was a 20 truck operation with rounds in several major South Florida cities. So Wayne is in the trash business now.
00:41:35
Speaker
After starting and growing his own small business, Huizenga made his real money by buying out small businesses and aggregating them into progressively bigger conglomerates. Sounds very familiar. Do a little bit of that yourself. Importing, exporting. Matchsticks and potato chips, yeah. The really long matchsticks. Yeah.
00:42:03
Speaker
You just got to be careful that they don't spark and catch all your potato chips on fire too. I was thinking really about just focusing on the importing and leaving the exporting. It does sound like a better idea. Although if the chips did catch on fire, that could be a lot of oil for bird grillings. Are we growing a bird?
00:42:27
Speaker
Did he say he's grilling a bird? What kind of bird you grilling? Well, you'd have peanut oil, right? Isn't that what's in chips? A lot of peanut oil? Oh, that's a good one, too. Well, it's a higher smoke point than I prefer for a deep fried bird, but it does add a certain level of... It's a Genesee qua. Taste, taste, tasteability is what I would call it. Yeah, I don't know what the fuck you just said. Sure. Sure. You're a man's man, Marvin. Do you not know what that shit means?
00:42:57
Speaker
Alright, he's back asleep. So, under Heizenga's... Oh, yep. So, he's bought out dozens of small garbage haulers and added in his own company to create his first billion dollar company, Waste Management. I am familiar with the name Waste Management. I think anybody in America probably is, aren't they? I would imagine so. It's gotta be the... If it's not the biggest, it's gotta be one of the biggest garbage...
00:43:28
Speaker
hauling companies, right? Got it. I got a waste management thing across the fucking road down from my place of business and they got about 400. Nah, not 400. Shit. Probably 100 fucking garbage trucks back there. Not a small operation by any means.
00:43:56
Speaker
I don't know. I don't know how I feel. You leave this earth and that's your legacy is a giant trash company. You know, not, not for nothing, but, uh, this, this all sounds very, very mafia adjacent. Frankly, this guy is, you know, he's buying up small businesses. It's all, he's in, he's in sanitation. If he didn't have such a funky Dutch last name, like Hyzinga. And if it was more like, I don't know.
00:44:27
Speaker
uh, Marinelli or something like, or Balboni, perhaps, uh, I would be, I would be apt to believe that this man was, uh, the leader of some mafia organization, uh, risuto perhaps. Yep. Uh, that would be good too. Um, but, uh, Martin, maybe, um, but, but it's, uh, I think as we continue to learn more, I don't think we're too far off.
00:44:57
Speaker
Uh, yeah, very good timing, Gabe. Under Huizenga's leadership, waste management was accused of everything from price fixing to violating environmental laws, to making improper political contributions. Huizenga stepped down as vice chairman in 1984 and planned to retire. Instead, however, he began growing his fortune by buying up mom and pop companies and consolidating them into larger entities.
00:45:26
Speaker
At the time of the Marlins expansion, Huizengo was best known for owning blockbuster video. Oh, you're goddamn right. You know, those fucking new releases aren't going to stock themselves, Gabe. Get in there, you bitch. We're guaranteeing them. You know, guaranteed new releases. Remember that?
00:45:51
Speaker
I do. I look though, here's the reality of blockbuster for me. Uh, I was born in 1983. I am 40 years old. Uh, I was raised in a very small town. Where are you at? Northwest Indiana. Uh, we got to touch every bag on every episode, as you know, uh, uh, demented.
00:46:21
Speaker
Yeah. My personal place to rent tapes was a little place called Page's Home Theater. Page was the family's last name, and it's now a subway, which makes me want to vomit.
00:46:44
Speaker
And they like, like you walk in, they used to smoke in there because like it was their place. So it didn't fucking matter. So like the place smelled like smoke birds. No, that was down at the pizza place. There was, it was, and we'll talk about it later. Sorry, that's too much to be to you. It's your own story for God's sake. And it'll make you do more than walk. When you walk in.
00:47:10
Speaker
The place smells like stale cigarette smoke and the plastic from all of the tapes, right? Oh, man. Right. And and they'd always have popcorn popping in a little machine in the back. So like it's popcorn, it's plastic and it's stale cigarette smoke. And right now I can like just thinking about it, I can smell it. Right. And it's the most fantastic smell ever concocted. But
00:47:41
Speaker
because we were in a small town, we were about 10 miles or 12 miles or so, like a 20 minute drive from the nearest Blockbuster. So we didn't have a Blockbuster account growing up.
00:47:51
Speaker
I had one once I got a car. So it wasn't until I was like 17 that I even like experienced blockbuster in any real way. But the fact is, if I could drive and be guaranteed, I could get a new release. That's a beautiful thing at the time you could, but, um, yeah, pages did not, I mean, the most they ever had of, of one title was probably three. Yeah. Really. That's all they needed.
00:48:15
Speaker
When you got your car and you're driving around all the blockbusters within an hour radius to see what different wrestling tapes they had, right? Oh, fucking eight. Come on. Yeah. Uh, it just, man, God damn it. It's a double-edged sword of a show like this. We start talking about how shit, everything used to be better. It's just like, why, why do we even try? It's making my stomach hurt for full disclosure. Yeah. I feel like I'm going to be sick right here on air. Fucking worst.
00:48:45
Speaker
It started when you started talking about that video store smell. It's amazing how something that smells so good as a child can make you nauseous as an adult. But that's baseball, I suppose. That's baseball. I didn't have a blockbuster until I was 12, I think. Because we didn't have blockbusters where I used to live.
00:49:14
Speaker
and moved out here and, uh, yeah, 12 years old. And they had one about, I don't know, 15 miles away, maybe mad WrestleMania eight there. I remember that. Anyway, I digress. Thanks, Wayne. Um, during his ownership of the Marlins, a Huizenga sold blockbuster to Viacom for 8.4 billion. Man.
00:49:40
Speaker
Again, using his buy small and consolidate model created AutoNation, a Fortune 500 network of car dealerships. In 2017, Isengo's ranked the 288th wealthiest American with a net worth of 2.8 billion. I mean, he sold Blockbuster 3. Man, he just knew when to get out.
00:50:04
Speaker
Right. And I think we're going to keep seeing that over and over and over again, but he knew when to get out. And boy, oh boy, did he get out at the right time. He died on March 22nd, 2018 at the age of 80 in his Fort Lauderdale home. He knew exactly when the fuck to get out. Perfect timing. Uh, however, before then, Huizenga started building his front office staff before the other owners had cast their final votes of approval.
00:50:33
Speaker
The first person Heizenga brought on board was Karl Barger, his president. Formerly the president of the Pittsburgh Pirates and longtime friend of Heizenga's. Would you like to take a look? It's B-A-R-G-E-R. If you'd like to see Mr. Barger and let me know what you think of him. Karl Barger, Pittsburgh attorney and baseball executive. That's him. Let's see here.
00:51:03
Speaker
Oh, you know what? Karl Barger appears to me to be the type of man that wants a mashed potatoes with every single meal. He is a potato man, isn't he? You know, darling, I would really like it if you would make us a pot full of mashed potatoes that we can have with our pizza tonight.
Carl Barger's Impact on Marlins
00:51:29
Speaker
I just, I love the savory, buttery flavor.
00:51:33
Speaker
of a nice pile of mashed potatoes. Carl Barger has two feet of neck below his beard line. He does indeed. He does indeed. I've never seen so much neck below a beard line. I, I might, is this, do I attribute this to a, a weak chin?
00:52:01
Speaker
Is that what's going on? Oh, there's a, there's a significantly weak chin there. There's no question about it. Yeah. But that's, it's, it's Midwest stock, man. That's what it is. You look at this guy who's, I mean, Pittsburgh's kind of on the East end of the Midwest, but it's close enough. Okay. It's close enough. I guess you got to see this. Oh my God. Oh, it's coming. Oh, okay.
00:52:30
Speaker
Holy shit, who made this? What is happening? That's somebody that's a bust of his face. OK, so this thing this thing is apparently at PNC Park. It looks it looks like his head, if it were charred in an auto accident and and somehow not all the skin melted. Yes. Yeah. It was
00:53:02
Speaker
It was a bad idea, executed poorly. And apparently just the folks at PNC Park at the Pirates decided they don't care. We love this man and so we're going to put this charred version of him
00:53:21
Speaker
Honestly, it looks like if he were the chainsaw massacre guy, like he's wearing somebody else's face. I was going to say this is some sort of movie villain that's died in the end scene and he's fallen in a vat of some sort.
00:53:43
Speaker
My god, oh my. It's absolutely terrible. I do not know the... What's the thing hanging off the right side? Those are... That's the extra neck that we've been talking about. Exactly. Like, it's... It just jets out. Like this... This must be a shirt collar or something? I guess it could be. This is the most god-awful thing I've ever seen in my life. And...
00:54:13
Speaker
It just fell into our lap. That's beautiful. Anyway. That's absolutely disgusting. We'll have to tweet that out. Yeah, I think that's a definite tweet. Let's see here. Carl Barter, of course. Barter was a member of the board of directors of Heizenga's blockbuster video. Barter technically resigned from the Pirates on July 8, 1991, but while Major League rules
00:54:42
Speaker
barred one person from working for two clubs at once. Barger was allowed to begin staffing the front office of the Marlins while also running the Pirates until the owner selected new president. Wayne, let me ask you something. What, Carl? If I come on board to help with this new team in Florida,
00:55:11
Speaker
I'm going to have to demand that you stock my new apartment with as much Idahoan instant potatoes as you can possibly find. Well, send a fucking trash truck of them over. God damn it. OK, thank you. What I would hate to have happen is for me to eat so many mashed potatoes that you find me
00:55:40
Speaker
somehow decapitated and burned alive in my apartment. And then you make a statue of it and you put it at PNC Park. That would be terrible. I'd never do that to you pal. I'll tell you what, I'll send you a copy of Don't Tell Mom the Babysitter is Dead over. We got it fully stocked in the VHS, guarantee. Love that Christine Applegate bitch. Can you send some popcorn as well please? Popcorn and potatoes, you got it cowboy.
00:56:10
Speaker
Oh, thank you, Wayne. I appreciate you running the ball club, Carl. No way I'll put that bust of your burned face up. Janine, get a bust of Barger's burned face. I'm going to fuck with him. H-H, baby. Let's see here. I lost my place. So Barger, as it turned out, Barger would never seen his team play a single game.
00:56:39
Speaker
On December 9th, 1992, during the annual winter meetings in Louisville, he collapsed from a ruptured, abdominal aortic aneurysm. He was taken to a hospital in the ambulance, but died before surgery can be performed. Barger's position remained vacant through the Marlins first season. Today, Carl F. Barger Boulevard sits outside what is known as Hard Rock Stadium, formerly Joe Robbie Stadium, among other names, the first home of the Marlins.
00:57:10
Speaker
So, Carl's abdominal aortic aneurysm caused his head to explode and to catch on fire and the pirate's monument, what's the word I'm looking for, monument? God damn it, they... Memorialize? Yes, yes, that's it, fuck.
00:57:39
Speaker
All right, next move for the Marlins is the point of GM. In September of 91, the Marlins hired Dave Dombrowski away from the Montreal Expos. Dombrowski in turn lured virtually all the Expos front-off executives to the expansion Marlins. As Murray Chasse of the New York Times put it, Dombrowski was not bashful about rating his former employers covered
00:58:05
Speaker
At least 12 elite at last count, 12 other former expo employees had migrated, including the scouting director, the assistant scouting director, the player development director, the senior consultant on player personnel, the special consultant to the vice president for player personnel, three scouts, three minor league coaches and a secretary. And what else? A partridge and a pear tree. We cook at partridge.
00:58:35
Speaker
I thought you were going to say the assistance of the traveling secretary. Ah, son of a bitch. Low hanging Seinfeld fruit. I'm sorry, Paul. Maybe next time. Um, but one position that is not filled by a former expo was manager. The job of managing an expansion team had never been easy. Out of 34 seasons coached by the 10 previous managers of major league expansion teams, only three seasons, all from the same manager.
00:59:02
Speaker
that is Bill Rigney of the Angels, were winning seasons. For this daunting task, the Marlins chose Renee Latchman. Are you familiar with Renee? As one would. Not to be confused with Renee Goulet. My favorite of those guys in the tan sports coats that would run out is Renee Goulet without question. How money of it would have been if Renee Latchman wore
00:59:32
Speaker
The one glove, at least one time. Little Dutch boy haircut, blue tinted glasses, and one glove. What a gross man. That man was just fucking disgusting. Uh, in 1992 when Latchman was hired, he had not managed a baseball team for eight years. His last stop had been with the Milwaukee Brewers in 1984.
00:59:58
Speaker
That's fucking news to me. Jesus Christ. And if expansion dilutes the talent level, the major league player pool by promoting previously unqualified or unsuccessful players, the same could be said of the managerial pool. Despite being liked by his players, particularly in Seattle, Latchman had only three winning records in 13 minor and major league seasons. Ouch.
01:00:25
Speaker
Once in Class A, once in AA, once in AAA, when his Spokane Indians were 11 and 9 in the Pacific Coast League before Latchman was promoted to manage the Mariners for the rest of the season. Latchman never had a winning season with the Marlins. His only managing job after that was one game as an interim manager of the Chicago Cubs. News to me. So this is exciting here.
01:00:54
Speaker
The Marlins even had a television broadcast team lined up before any of the players have been drafted. For play by play, they hired Jay Randolph. And do you know who they hired for their analysis? I do not. Hey buddy, why don't you come on in? I'd like to talk to you a little bit more about the teachings of Elrond Hubbard. It's Gary fucking Carter. God damn right it is. As we have told you probably,
01:01:24
Speaker
erroneously that he teaches people about the Church of Scientology. Have you been baptized in that one? I'm holding out on that one just until I need it. There's always room for one or two more baptisms. You don't want to play your cards before you need to. Correct. I mean, look, if I'm ever in the same room with Tom Cruise and he wants to bring me on as some sort of
01:01:53
Speaker
special consultant, this or that. I have no problem with with letting him eradicate my thetans. It's fine. It sounds like those people are just completely just detached from reality, aren't they? I mean, look, man, what are they doing? What are they doing? A lot and not enough. Is it about fucking? I would imagine it's a solid, a solid bit about fucking.
01:02:24
Speaker
Because everything, as you know, is about coming. Who are they trying to fuck? Whoever they need to fuck, in the moment they need to fuck them. Are they into the traditional fucking, or is there some sort of darkness? I think anything that's as secretive as Scientology, there's got to be some kind of
01:02:50
Speaker
uh, dark fucking happening. Um, however, however you want to interpret that, like, uh, is it kink maybe? Is it, uh, is it, is it, is it, is it, uh, what's the word I'm looking for? Now it's my, my turn for this bullshit. Uh, is it, uh, is it dark journey? Gotcha.
01:03:14
Speaker
Fuckin' terrible. You gave me a fucking picture of Rene Latchman while this is going on, by the way. I did. You want to talk about the kisser of the week, pals? Fuckin' 1984 Topps card. Uh-huh. He looks like Stephen Wright, the 80s comedian. That's a good call. What I thought of was Dr. Steve Brule, the John C. Riley character from
01:03:44
Speaker
Tim and Eric he looks like a love child of Stephen Wright and and John Lennon before he was assassinated Like in that last year little little cowboy Bob Orton in there, too. There's a little cowboy Bob Orton. Uh-huh. Yep Well hep C to this a lot of hep C. I think we're gonna joke twice now. Yeah, it is what it is Renee
01:04:12
Speaker
managed in one way or another in major league baseball for 57 years. Good God. See, there's something wrong with that. Incredibly wrong. Like from, I think that the math works out as, yeah, 1970 to 2017. It's almost La Russa-esque. Maybe more. So Gary Carter's coming on.
01:04:41
Speaker
Um, next step for the Marlins franchise was a stock it's roster. So that's when we get to the, uh, the draft and how, how that would mostly be done. Um, a little bit there, um, before we kind of get into the draft itself, how it worked, each team was allowed to protect 15 players. So every ball club can say you can't touch these guys, these 15 there are, can't pick them.
01:05:11
Speaker
Um, and could lose up to three players in the draft. So team can't lose any more than three players. Once three are gone, they're out. This also meant that it was the first time teams from both leagues split the expansion fees. Each new franchise paid a fee of 95 million to join for a total of 190 million. Of this total 22%, 42 million went to the American league, 3 million per team.
01:05:39
Speaker
The remaining 148 million was divided among the National League teams for the 12.33 million each.
Expansion Draft Rules and Analysis
01:05:49
Speaker
American League officials were understandably upset that they had to provide just as many players to the draft, but received less than a quarter of the amount of the franchise fees that the National League teams received. Oakland Athletics General Manager, Sandy Alderson said that the American League teams would rather receive no money
01:06:09
Speaker
and not had to provide players because three players were potentially more valuable than 3 million. Chicago White Sox owner Jerry Reinsdorf, one of the most vocal opponents of the plan, said the same. However, when asked if he would have taken the 3 million for the three players the White Sox had actually lost in the 1976 expansion draft, when the Toronto Blue Jays and the Seattle Mariners were at the American League, he said he happily would.
01:06:41
Speaker
I would be more than happy to take that money. Another American League owner who complained about the deal said that he would be thrilled to have gotten 3 million in exchange for the five players his club lost in the 1976 expansion draft. Still, the owners knew there was nothing they could do but to try to change Commissioner Vincent's mind. As a compromise to the American League owners, Vincent decided that all 12 National League teams
01:07:08
Speaker
would lose three players and that only eight American League teams would lose three players with the other six teams only losing two players. He also allowed each National League team to protect three additional players each time they lost a player to the draft, but allowed each American League team to protect four more players each time. So you got that? Yes, but it's the most convoluted bullshit of all time.
01:07:37
Speaker
Like my God, can you imagine the draft board? Just like what's happening in the room at the time that this, that this is going like, all right, how long do you wait between picks? How long do you give? You know, how long did they give the Braves after the first pick to come back with their three team, three new guys that couldn't be touched?
01:08:00
Speaker
Yeah, it's fucking riveting television, right? Oh, yeah. Yeah, fantastic. I guess that's why you can't find it on YouTube is because it's just so incredibly well produced and put together. I know I watched it. I remember watching it. I remember the logo seared into my brain. The logo that they did was just it. It really is beautiful logo, what they put together there. But yeah, no, I don't remember watching it.
01:08:28
Speaker
So that's, that's kind of the story on, on baseball and Miami and how we get there, um, heading into the draft and we'll talk about, we'll talk about Mr. Wayne effing Heizenga a little bit more in depth later, but, um, it's, it's time to basically, uh, take a look at the draft board and, and see, see what we got and who goes where.
01:08:58
Speaker
I have it in front of me here and uh, frankly, we'll go through it, you know, and talk about some of this stuff. But frankly, I do have a, sorry, I did have a time, um, uh, which before we actually get into the draft, maybe it was a November 92 article out of the Washington post. So from the, uh, real time there to, to look at the vibe around the,
01:09:27
Speaker
the country as these teams came into it, it, it covers off on, it's, it's basically the day after the draft. Um, but I just, I didn't want to cut you off, but before you get into like specifics and names and all that, um, Rockies titled, um, Rockies Marlins become real expansion teams.
01:09:52
Speaker
by Mark Maskey, November 19, 1992, The Washington Post, which reminds us that democracy dies in darkness. Got that? Got it. New York, New York. No, New York, November 18. Baseball's two news franchises, the Florida Marlins and the Colorado Rockies, were not supposed to look like traditional expansion clubs by today.
01:10:18
Speaker
Tuesday after all was to have yielded an expansion draft like the major leagues never had seen before The Marlins and the Rockies were to have emerged resembling real teams So a little shot there Alas the predictions particularly one about the new tens and teams may be being contenders in 1993 Probably were far fetched Today the Marlins and Rockies looked every bit like honest to goodness expansion clubs. I
01:10:48
Speaker
The condition created in part by unavoidable circumstances and in part by their own draft day choices. Meanwhile, most of baseball's other 26 clubs left town this morning believing that their plans for the 93 season largely were unaffected by Tuesday's tedious proceedings. So there you go, Gabe, tedious. Hit it right on the head.
01:11:16
Speaker
It feels now, looking back on it like, how do you screw up something that's so cool and different and like that we haven't really experienced, what 16 years between the two expansion drafts.
01:11:32
Speaker
Well, you get the ninety seven one after this. Right. Well, I mean, between between seventy six and ninety two. Right. So, like, you've got this long stretch and you have the opportunity to make this sexy and fun and cool and hip and all those. And you have ESPN now on a larger scale. And so you can really kind of blow this thing out and make it. And instead you just make it a fucking. A live reading of crime and punishment. Jackoff shows what it was. There you go.
01:12:02
Speaker
fucking jacking off in your grandma's house. You got nothing else to do. Don't even have good porn. You got to go back in your memory bank and try to come up with something. That's what that expansion draft was. Decision makers of the two new teams went into the draft, pledging that they choose primarily younger players in hopes of building a solid foundation for down the road success.
01:12:32
Speaker
That, added with the ominous economic state of the game, is why other clubs took the risk of leaving such prominent players as Danny Tardible, Jack Morris, and Glenn Davis off their original 15-man protected list. And that, in turn, is why Tuesday brought the possibility that something unique and shocking could happen.
01:12:55
Speaker
It brought the possibility and then it reminded you that that's not going to happen. Correct. This is it's actually going to suck and like so it's just a bunch of New York. Yeah. Yeah. Yep. Yeah. It's just a bunch of fucking names of guys on baseball cards you didn't want the ones that you used in your in your fucking spokes. That's to make your your bikes on like a motorcycle. That's what this is.
01:13:24
Speaker
Yeah, with a couple exceptions pretty much, you know, young guys that pan out, but yeah, for the most part, um, it, uh, I'll echo that last sentiment there. Uh, that in turn is why Tuesday brought the possibility that something unique and shocking could happen. It didn't.
01:13:46
Speaker
All right. Watching the post. The tone of the draft was set early on. The Rockies selected Atlanta Braves pitching prospect, David Need with the number one pick in the Marlins opted for power hitting outfield prospect, Nigel Wilson, who probably won't even be in the big leagues at the beginning of next season from the Toronto Blue Jays organization. I do remember those two picks were pretty much a, I remember back at the time and that was pretty much consensus of what the picks were going to be.
01:14:15
Speaker
Um, need was supposed to be a can't miss prospect kind of deal. And well, he missed, um, but not quite as much as Nigel did, but, um, the Rockies created a bit of a stir with their second pick, snatching third baseman, Charlie Hayes from the New York Yankees. Which is funny because Charlie ends up back there with the, uh, final catch of the 96 world series territory.
01:14:45
Speaker
But from there, the affair became almost exclusively a young talent search of players earmarked for big league success beginning in 95 or 96. Florida GM, Dave Dombrowski, indicated only about half of the 36 players he picked on Tuesday are likely to begin the season in the major leagues. We believe we have some access to some veteran players from other sources, Marlin's president, Carl Barger, said before he fucking died.
01:15:14
Speaker
I don't think you can say we're committed to the super youth movement to the point where we'll have a trouble filling an opening day lineup. I think we'll have a pretty good opening day lineup. I don't think it'll take as long in the waiting period to be a winning team and that I've heard you talk about. On the other hand, you won't see us commit economic suicide. What we will do is stockpile potatoes though, however, and young talent. That's right. I'm planning on having a couple of stands at the concession area dedicated solely to mashed potatoes.
01:15:44
Speaker
Karl Barger's potato stand. The expansion draft even as eagerly awaited as it was became nothing more than a mundane start to the building of the Marlins and the Rockies. Today, Tardible still was a Yankee. Team officials said that they added the slayer to the protected list following their first round loss of Hayes. So there you go. So once they lost Charlie Hayes, they put Tardible on the list.
01:16:14
Speaker
Morris still was a Blue Jay and Davis still was a Baltimore Oreo. God, we can't get away from the Oreos. It's almost magical. Oh, they are so magical. You have no idea. It's the most serendipitous thing in my life right now, Marvin. I thank you for it. And I won't thank you for making this the best day
01:16:43
Speaker
And the new teams were left contemplating opening day lineups that could include such non-luminaries as Freddie, Benavideez, Eric Young, and Monty Ferris. Eric Young moving with Ron Washington to Los Angeles, that's a coach of the Angels now.
01:17:05
Speaker
Suddenly it seems that the all-time record of 70 victories by an expansion club set by the Los Angeles Angels who went 70 and 91 and finished eighth in a 10 team league in 1961 may not be in jeopardy after all. There were some surprises in the draft. Perhaps the most stunning was the Marlins selection of California Angels relief pitching ace Brian Harvey who's coming off elbow surgery.
01:17:31
Speaker
Harvey definitely has the face of a man that says I ain't no bitch That pic appeared to be a precursor to a trade involving Harvey But Marlins officials said they plan to hold on to the pitcher although some think they'll hold on to him just long enough for him to demonstrate He's healthy and then try to deal him Colorado despite the fact that it already has sold more season tickets and all but three other big league teams and
01:18:00
Speaker
came away with more established major leaguers than Florida. You don't want to go overboard and pick a bunch of guys who have no chance to be around three years from now, but I don't want to do any more losing than we have to do next year. Rockies manager Don Baylor said, the Marlins say that they'll supplement what they got on Tuesday. Bit of an abrupt ending to the article, but that's it.
01:18:28
Speaker
Lots of really interesting stuff took place during this draft, like from a trade perspective. Now I know that I didn't watch it live because as we were doing the research for the show, I didn't realize that Dante Bechette was not drafted. No, he's a trade. He was a trade with Milwaukee.
01:18:56
Speaker
Everybody really wants Kevin Reamer on their team over Dante Bechette. A trimer asshole. Sure. If you say so, sir. Dante Bechette is the type of man that names his child Bo. Okay. Let's think about that for a minute.
01:19:24
Speaker
I mean, I guess at least it wasn't BEAU, I suppose. I suppose. Oh, that's that's very funny. Oh, man. As you look at the. You know, we kind of went over the whole kind of the parameters of the draft and all that, but. The.
01:19:53
Speaker
The Rockies, yeah, they don't draft him, but they're first signing. They do end up signing the big cat, Andres Galaraga. So that's a pretty notable... Who knows what happened, but he did definitely blossom in Colorado. If you have time to look up the big cat stats at pre and post Colorado, I would suggest that's a worthwhile exercise,
01:20:24
Speaker
I love the big cat. He had some. Some big, big time years. I don't know why we're talking fucking Galarraga. This is goddamn Florida show you dipshit, but I'm going to look these stats up real quick. I had to check it out and figure out who Bo was named after. And it's exactly who you think he was named after. Bo Beverly. Incorrect.
01:20:53
Speaker
Dante Bachete's a big Bo Jackson fan, huh? Apparently so. Bo Jackson. Yeah, Bo Bachete named after Bo Jackson. So, I would assume those two men are of a similar age. They gotta be, right? It's gotta be the same wheelhouse, at least very close. Do you name, are you gonna name your child after another one of your contemporaries?
01:21:18
Speaker
It depends on how much I like that contemporary, I guess. I'm just going to look at him and see the same asshole that I am. I mean, I plan on naming my first born son, Blake, so... It's Bonafacio, okay? Holy fuck. Damn it. Yeah, Beau for short. Oh, God. Fuck off. So you see the big cat gets to... I'll give you his homers and his RBIs here, all right?
01:21:48
Speaker
So starts out in Montreal 85 plays a handful of games same in 86 And plays about half season 86 but 87 is when he gets going full-time 13 homers 90 RBIs 88 29 and 92 89 23 and 85 90 20 and 87 so he's a 20 to 80 90 guy he's
01:22:16
Speaker
29 years old so he is he's hit his peak 27 is the baseball peak or it was anyway back when I cared enough to pay attention to that shit So he's passed his prime 1991 still in Montreal nine homers and 33 RBI's only has Does get hurt then he becomes a Cardinal in 92, which I was very excited about
01:22:45
Speaker
We only had him for 95 games, though. He gets hurt again. 10 homers, 39 RBIs. So it's looking like shit might be fucking over for the big cat. Not looking hot. 19 total homers in the last two years. 32 years old, heading to Colorado. 1993, 22 homers, 98 RBIs. 94, 31, and 85. 95, 31, and 106.
01:23:15
Speaker
And in his age 35 season, he hits 47 homers and has 150 RBIs in his age 36 season 41 and one 40 44 and one 21 in 1998. Yes. Allegedly. Yes. A hundred RBIs and 28 home runs in his age 39 season in the year 2000 with the Atlanta Braves.
01:23:44
Speaker
He goes on to play till 2004. Of course he does. So, I think it's safe to say the big cat was on some big G's, wasn't he? Yeah, there's an H in front of and behind the G in Galarraga. And by the way, Bo Jackson and Dante Bechette, one year apart, 62 and 63.
01:24:13
Speaker
Yeah, so yeah, they're right there. I don't know. I don't know how cool I think Dante is. So we talked about the top two picks, Nied and Wilson. This is basically, as we talked about, Nied was the number 23 prospect in baseball by Baseball America before the season. So yeah, not a good prospect, but probably not a future ace type.
01:24:44
Speaker
Um, solid number two, number three guy. Uh, look, look, I'm, I'm going through the list and as a cat, a relatively casual fan, right? Like a guy who's, who's heard of some of them and most of them I haven't. And I think that's probably the same for most. Um, I of the, the folks drafted, I recognize eight or nine of these names out of 72.
01:25:15
Speaker
So just quickly, right? I'm just gonna blast through these. David Nien, Nigel Wilson, Charlie Hayes, Jose Martinez, Darren Holmes, Brett Barbary, Gerald Clark, Trevor Hoffman. There's the name we all know. Kevin Reimer, excuse me. Pat Rapp, Eric Young Sr., know that name. Greg Hibbert, Jodie Reed, Chuck Carr, Scott Aldred, Darryl Whitmore, Alex Cole, Eric Hellfan,
01:25:43
Speaker
Joe Girardi. Everybody knows that name. Drop my microphone. Jesus. Brian Harvey. Call me Gabe. Brian Harvey. Willie Blair. Jeff Conine. Everybody knows Jeff Conine. Jayhawk Owens. Maybe the best name we've run across on this podcast thus far. Former catcher. Andy Ashby. People know that name. Jesus Tavares. Carl Everett. Freddie Benavidez. David Weathers. Roberto Mejia.
01:26:08
Speaker
John Johnstone, Doug Bach, Botchler, Ramon Martinez, Lance Painter, know that name. Steve Decker, Butch Henry, Chris Carpenter, Ryan Hoblitzel, Jack Armstrong, Vinny Castilla, know that name. Scott Cimperino, Brett Merriman, Tom Edams, Edens, Jim Tatum, Andres Berriman, Kevin Ritz, Robert Person, Eric Wedge, know that name.
01:26:35
Speaker
Jim Corsi, Keith Sheppard, Richie Lewis, Calvin Jones, Danny Jackson, Brad Osmus, of course you know that name. Bob Natal, Marcus Moore, Jamie McAndrew, Armando Reynoso, Junior Felix, know that name vaguely. Steve Reed, Kerwin Moore, Mo Sanford, Ryan Bowen, Pedro Castellano, know that name, I think because he was a cub, and I grew up in Chicago area. Scott Baker, Kurt Laskanek, Chris Donald, Scott Frederickson, Monte Ferris, Bralio Castillo,
01:27:04
Speaker
Jeff Tabaka, Dennis Uche. What? Who fucking cares? You got to build a ball club, Gabe. Sure. We're building from the ground. We're building from the ground up here. You got to build a foundation. You have gotten about an inch and a half off the ground with this foundation. So congratulations. Well, we're not going to win. What the fuck? He's going to bring some guys in and pay him a lot of money.
01:27:30
Speaker
You don't know shit about a ball club, you fucking asshole. Let me tell you, life's about the two T's, buddy. Trash tits and tapes. Got it? That's three. That's three T's, Wayne. No, trash tits is one. I'm talking busted fucking tits. Like busted like a parrot. Goddamn cross-eyed fucking titties, you know? That's what gets me hard. I'm talking trash tits, Gabe. One's an A, one's a C.
01:28:02
Speaker
It's. Is that a is that a compound word or is it all just a hypen? Oh, it's a hyphen. It's a fucking hypen. All right. So, yeah, you know, it's an eclectic group is what you're saying. Eclectic. Yeah, bad. I mean, well, I think when you went through all these guys and to me. I feel
01:28:31
Speaker
and this is certainly debatable, but, um, overall, I think the Marlins probably have the better draft.
Key Trades and Baseball Archetypes
01:28:41
Speaker
Yes. But the thing for the Rockies that kind of, uh, does tip that, uh, I don't want to say so much in their favor, but, um, Vinny Castilla is a pretty big deal. Yep. But then you have Trevor Hoffman that offsets that.
01:29:00
Speaker
for the Marlins too. Harvey was good, Kona and obviously he's Mr. Marlin. Hoffman and their second pick Jose Martinez.
01:29:17
Speaker
get dealt in a mid-season deal to the Padres for Gary Sheffield. So... Yep. Right. Sheffield. Yeah. When I was looking through it, I was like, where's Sheffield? Where did I miss this? And then I realized that it was a trade later on. Yeah. He was in San Diego because he was a bitch in Milwaukee and he hated Milwaukee and he didn't want to be in Milwaukee. So he got traded to San Diego and then they didn't want to deal with him.
01:29:43
Speaker
They traded him off to Florida and he was, you know, there for three, four years, but let's see. Kevin Reimer traded immediately after the draft to the Brewers for Dante Bechette. So there you have that sort of offsetting. So very, you know, pretty similar kind of shakes out similarly for both clubs, including Hoffman. There were six eventual all-stars 26 players taken.
01:30:14
Speaker
Eric Young for the Rockies, Joe Girardi, Brian Harvey for the Marlins, Kona and for the Marlins, Andy Ashby for the Rockies. Chuck Carr never made an all-star team, but has a great Wikipedia page. Would you like to look into that for us? Who is it? Chuck Carr. He was selected from the Cardinals. I remember Chuck was a speedy outfielder type, an archetype, like a Balboni, if you will. He was a car.
01:30:43
Speaker
That mean he was a small, fast African-American outfielder. That's what a car was. Like a Balboni was a battalion fucking meathead slinging salami and fucking dingers. Car has perhaps remembered most for his hasty departure from the Brewers in 1997. After popping out third base on a two balls no strike count after being signaled to take the next pitch, Car was questioned by manager Phil Garner.
01:31:13
Speaker
Car reportedly replied to Garner by saying in the third person. What's he say, Gabe? Oh, man. That ain't Chucky's game. Chucky hacks on 2-0.
01:31:37
Speaker
He was released, he was released from the club shortly thereafter. He played the rest of that season with the Houston Astros who won the 1997 national league central. Yes. National league. Uh, he hit a post-season home run off John Smoltz in game three of the NLDS. The home run would be the last at bat of his career. Carr died on November 12th, 2022 at the age of 55. We lost check too soon. It sounds like. I think you're right.
01:32:07
Speaker
Um, so Chuck Carr, uh, uh, uh, in the, in the vein of a Willie Mays Hayes, it's, he sounds like a car to me, you know, like that's it. There's so much comfort in that in there. Yeah. He knew he's going to swipe a bag. He's going to have some quips. He's going to say some fucking snarky, funny shit. That ain't Chuckie's game. He was going to refer to him on two. Oh, just like Ricky, you know,
01:32:37
Speaker
Oh, I, I don't know if we have cars anymore. No, we don't. Of course we don't. We don't have shit. We don't have archetypes. We've talked about this. We don't have Balbonis. We don't have cars. We've got, we've got spreadsheets. We've got, uh, thank you. Uh, you fucking dipshit, uh, Billy Bean fuck off.
01:33:02
Speaker
We got spreadsheets that I also like to refer to as spread cheeks. Get it? Your butt cheeks, you spread your butt cheeks, your butt holes in there, unless you have a penis where that goes. Right. But all that to say, in the second round, there were three future all-stars, Carl Evert from the Marlins, Vinny Castilla from the Rockies, and I'll have you, I believe, if I'm,
01:33:32
Speaker
Memory serves me the starter of the 1990 National League for a National League All-Star team Jack Armstrong He was on the Cincinnati Reds. I believe he started the game in Chicago I Know he pitched in it anyway, but that's when they the year after they got the lights big big deal And then they had a fucking rain delay for an hour. I Used to have that videotape and I had the whole fucking rain delay to like recorded
01:34:02
Speaker
I wish I had that somewhere. I wish you did. We would watch it. That would be a fun, that would be a fun launch. And then the third round, they say mostly terrible outside of Awesomeness and Danny Jackson. Danny Jackson did go on to have some decent, going to be on some Cardinal playoff teams. He was pretty decent pitcher in the eighties. He had a good career before this, but, um,
01:34:30
Speaker
Yeah, kind of a little bit of a mixed bag and as as we go through the Here's what the so I guess we figure out who had the better draft. Here's what they look like in the 90s the Rockies from 93 to 2,000 67 and 95 53 and 64 77 and 67 There's a strike shortened. Yeah bullshit made the playoffs in 95 that year
01:34:59
Speaker
96 83 79 83 and 79 77 and 85 72 and 90 and 82 and 80 the Marlins 64 98 So they go on to win three less games in the Rockies in the inaugural season 94 51 and 64 95 67 76 96 80 and 82
01:35:29
Speaker
97, they go 92 and 70 and win the world series. Mm hmm. First wildcard team to ever win the world series, by the way. And then in 1998, they go 54 and 108. They pumped and dumped, didn't they? Holy shit. 99, 64, 98, 2,079 and 82.
01:35:55
Speaker
Overall, the Rockies go 594 and 639 and the Marlins 551 and 678. And we end with the question, would you rather be competitive every year or when a world series wants? Well, neither team is competitive every year. So I'm not sure where that falls in the fucking equation, but I guess I'd rather have the Marlins. Yeah. I mean, I guess I'd rather have the title course.
01:36:22
Speaker
You get two of them now because they get one in. Oh, three. Oh, three as well. Yeah. It's kind of how the draft shook out. So any anything, you know, one one little kind of tidbit from that. Nigel Wilson as a daughter of some noteworthy fame. Did you know that? You know what? I think I looked this up, but you might have mentioned this to me.
01:36:54
Speaker
Who is that? She was on the... Oh, the Real Housewives of Atlanta, right? Yes, exactly. Yeah, I don't know who Latoya Forever is. Latoya Forever, Gabe. But she's apparently Canadian as well. I didn't realize that Nigel Wilson was a Canadian man.
01:37:15
Speaker
Latoya Howard better known under the name Latoya forever is a Canadian YouTube personality and author best known for her God damn it Contribution to what everything that's wrong with America. Yeah her YouTube channel as well as her video blog channel blah blah blah More than 1 million subscribers with more than blah blah blah shitty book she is
01:37:45
Speaker
Also known as Latoya Forever and Latoya Ali. Sure. Did you know in people's Wikipedia's they now have subscribers and total views on there? These are all very important things. Unfucking real, man. What a shitty existence. She was born in 1987.
01:38:15
Speaker
married to Adam Ollie in 2014 and divorced in 2020. Congratulations to her and to all of us for having learned about her today. I am Bonafacio forever. So I guess that only really leaves us with one other place to go. That's right. It is time friends.
01:38:42
Speaker
Well, it's not the most traditional version. It is, it is time to pucker up. It's time to deep dive into the kisser of the week. The one and only Wayne fucking Huizinga. Trash tits, buddy. That's what I'm fucking talking about. Trash tits, Gabe. You know, we kind of went over the, the,
01:39:09
Speaker
the outline, what it looked like. Spoiler alert, they told us Wayne died. So, let's just, we'll take a couple, I don't know, a couple looks at what Wayne's, what he left behind for us, I guess, and how that made people feel. Gone too soon, Wayne Heisinger. From Lindsay Quinn here. Trash, grit, and videotape.
01:39:39
Speaker
and owed to the late blockbuster billionaire Wayne. Trash tits and videotape. Is that what she said? Trash grit and videotape. Oh, well, she missed an opportunity there. Apparently, she was not familiar with the trash tit fetish that we know of.
Wayne Huizenga's Legacy
01:39:59
Speaker
See, here's the thing, Gabe, I didn't tell anybody. I didn't tell those bitches about the trash tit thing. They would have been uncomfortable with it.
01:40:08
Speaker
telling you though, cause you're one of the boys, you know, it's about fucking trash tits and coming pal. I get it. I do. I do make them, make them feel like they're special and important regardless of the shape and size of their trash tits. Now go stock those fucking raisinets you bitch. Got it. On the way. Thank you, sir. Empty the trash too. Beloved eccentric billionaire, Wayne Hyzinga. Beloved eccentric. Yes. Okay.
01:40:36
Speaker
Beloved eccentric billionaire Wayne Hyzinga passed away last Thursday at the age of 80 And even if you didn't recognize his name, you probably know some of his work blockbuster video ring any bells and by the way, okay, so There's a an animation in this article
01:41:01
Speaker
And it is Wayne Heizenga flying through the air to heaven with a blockbuster video tape in his hand. I'm gonna send you the picture, but I need you to understand that this Wayne is moving and on the site. I just noticed it. He's flying to the heavens with a blockbuster video release in his hand.
01:41:33
Speaker
Oh, boy. And it's very clearly just Wayne Hyzinga's giant head. Yes. Photoshopped onto a very skinny man's body. It's a long, long, long man. That might be Tom Hanky's body. It might be the hose. The hose. That's correct. Kathy said, is that your body, Tom, on Mr. Hyzinga? And I said, that just might be me. I'll tell you what.
01:42:00
Speaker
Kathy do you want me? I'm gonna fly home. Do you want me to stop at McDonald's on the way? He's literally going to fly like hazinga flying through the air. Mm-hmm I'm gonna pick up a tape or two and blockbuster to like I gotta drop mr. Heisinga off at heaven first. I can't believe I can't believe they They use that picture of me and just paste it on my body
01:42:28
Speaker
He was a little eccentric, but we loved him. Blockbuster video ring any bells? Huizenga had a reported net worth of $2.2 billion in 2017. Your rose to cult status as an entrepreneur thanks to his MO of growing businesses and the industry leaders and then selling them off for massive gains.
01:42:56
Speaker
They go over some of the stuff we talked about earlier basically how he gets all of his money made Blockbuster Uses his Cash to buy the he buys the Dolphins as well in 94 for 138 million buys the Panthers hockey team
01:43:28
Speaker
which he operated as a public holding company, Panthers Holding Group to invest in real estate and triple his initial investment to 150 million. Um, from VHS to the NHL, Huizenga has made his fortune on an uncanny knack for striking when the iron was hot and getting out when the getting's good. There it is. You hit it on this man. This man is a pullout artist. Well,
01:43:58
Speaker
You remember we started with a beloved note at the beginning, and I think we'll take another look here to see more of a full picture, if you will, of Mr.
Huizenga's Troubled Family Background
01:44:11
Speaker
Huizenga. And his incredibly deep acne scars, yes. Mm-hmm. This is from Stephen Almond back in December of 1994.
01:44:25
Speaker
This was in the Miami New Times. Made note that Heizenga was 56 years old when this story was written and published. And this is Citizen Wayne, the unauthorized biography of H. Wayne Heizenga. Of all the myths that followed Wayne Heizenga,
01:44:51
Speaker
Wayne's a self-made man, champion of the little guy, and savior of South Florida. None does so much in accounting for the Wayne who presented himself to Thomas Millwood on October 11th, 1960. A self-employed electrical engineer, Millwood opened the front door of his Pampano Beach home
01:45:14
Speaker
that Tuesday to a man of moderate height and build, his blue eyes squinty, his blonde hair already receding, the visitor was a salesman of sorts. He proposed that Millwood switch the garbage collection services to the firm he represented, Pompano Carding. Now,
01:45:40
Speaker
Would you like to switch your garbage collecting services, sir? Would it be something you'd be interested in? Well, it depends. Who exactly is it that I'd be switching to? At age 22, Harry Wayne Heizenga, Jr. was at what can be characterized at a crisis point in his young career.
01:46:03
Speaker
While his classmates from nearby Pinecrest High School were earning their diplomas from elite colleges and slipping into comfortable jobs, Huizenga had done little but wander in the five years since graduating high school, drifting from low-wage jobs to a brief stab at college to a hitch in the Army Reserve.
01:46:27
Speaker
the heir to a once prosperous family whose economic fortunes had gone bust in Florida, Huizenga came back to Fort Lauderdale in 1960 with a newlywed wife, seething with ambition, but without much in the way of prospects, he took a job selling trash hauling services door to door. Thomas Millwood, you got something there? I mean, would you like to buy some of the services? Here's the thing, man.
01:46:58
Speaker
I'm very biased about this for sure, but there's nothing, and we talked about this jokingly in the past, there's nothing that prepares you for success more
01:47:13
Speaker
then being faced with rejection over and over and over and over and over and over and over again. And there's no more difficult version of sales than door to door. And the kind of, I mean, especially today, like if you have somebody come to your house and try to sell you shit today, I can't imagine anybody's making you living that way. But even then- I'm yelling at you if you're doing that. If you're knocking at my door, I am making you feel like shit.
01:47:43
Speaker
Yeah, yeah. And the boot camp that that puts you through can very, that very easily explains the facial scarring on Wayne Huizinga because I'm sure it came from the inside out because he got beat up quite a bit, if not physically, then mentally and emotionally doing that.
01:48:08
Speaker
It leads to a sort of ability to let the bullshit roll off your back and just keep moving forward. There's something to it. Thomas Millwood, however, was not swayed by the sales pitch, a rejection that evidently caused something in young Heizenga to snap.
01:48:31
Speaker
According to a civil suit. I want to be clear. I don't see the article that Blake is reading to us right now, just for the record. According to a civil suit Millwood filed in November of 1961, Heizenga refused to vacate the premises. After using abusive and profane language to both. Fuck you, buddy. To both Millwood and his wife.
01:48:58
Speaker
Fuck you and your cut life pal! Hey, fuck her too, fucking cut! The defendant Heizenga attacked Millwood in a fit of anger and without provocation, striking him on his face and body using great force and violence, thereby inflicting great bodily harm and mental shock.
01:49:27
Speaker
This is not the direction I thought this article was going to go. The altercation left Millwood with a ripped shirt, broken sunglasses, and abrasions on his face. Most painful note of the lawsuit.
01:49:47
Speaker
was the permanent injury to the testicles and genital area as a result of grabbing and twisting by the defendant.
01:50:08
Speaker
Come here, you little fucking son of a bitch. You know that. Absolutely, sir. No need. You feel the twisting. You feel the blood supply getting cut off. I'm going to be dying in my hand, you cocksucker. I'll be I'll be frank. I would love new waste management services, please. Well, you had to say, pal. The matter went to trial where Huizenga claimed Jesus Christ. No, it had instigated the violence.
01:50:37
Speaker
The jury believed Millwood and awarded him $1,000 in damages. What year was this? 1961. So what's that inflation wise? We'll check and see. Not enough. I would imagine around $12,000 maybe. Not enough. I'll tell you that. Permanent damage to his testicles and he got a grand. He has nuts destroyed in front of his wife by this trash man. Duke Drosie came to his house and ripped his nuts off.
01:51:06
Speaker
in front of his fucking wife. Yeah, $10,293.95. Jesus Christ. Yeah, for a healthy pair of testicles? No, I'm afraid we need to be a little bit higher than that. The price was a steep one, especially for a fellow. I said, that's steep enough, I would argue.
01:51:36
Speaker
Especially for a fellow just starting to make his way in the world. But Hizenga learned a vital lesson from the incident. Mmm. One that would serve him well. You ready? I am. Bring it to me. What lesson did he learn? When met with resistance, don't get caught grabbing the opposition by the balls. Have someone else do it. God fuck.
01:52:07
Speaker
Have someone else do it. I almost went down for that, you fucker. That piece of shit, I almost went down because that fucking asshole took me to court because he was a bitch. I'm not gonna go down for a piece of shit like that again. I'll have somebody else fucking do it. This brand of prudent ruthlessness has in many ways propelled his stupefying rise
01:52:36
Speaker
from lowly garbage toter to master of all he surveys. This, uh, this writer, uh, can coin and turn a phrase prudent ruthlessness. I believe that's a cousin of ruthless aggression. Uh, distant cousin. Yeah. Same wheelhouse. Not to be confused with toothless aggression, which finds you dead in the dogs and the enclosed pool area. Um,
01:53:04
Speaker
His stupefying rise from lowly garbage toter to the master of all his surveys. I just wanted to say that again. Yeah. It was in evidence throughout his stewardship of waste management incorporated the gracious garage garbage giant that staked him to a fortune. And during the acquisition of blockbuster entertainment corporation, the video rental company that sealed his reputation as wall street's king Midas.
01:53:33
Speaker
The embarrassing scuffle in Thomas Millwood's front yard, of course, has long since been erased from Hisenga's official mythos, as he has the dark underside of his corporate legacy. Today, the 56-year-old Hisenga is known chiefly as the straight shooting owner of South Florida's beloved sports teams.
01:53:58
Speaker
paid toadies and all strike reporters paint him as a model of corporate benevolence, a self-made tycoon at sporting events, father's pointizing as proof of the adage, the American dream can come true for anyone. In fact, his life is far better testament to the prevailing law of American aristocracy. Make enough money and people quit asking how. That's it. There it is.
01:54:27
Speaker
There it is. They just go, wow. He's worth a lot. Guy's got a lot of money. I've got a lot of fucking money. Wayne Heisinger. Oh, sorry. Go ahead. No, he, he founded Extended Stay America too. Those shitty ass long extended stay hotels. We, he's the one to blame for that bullshit. Oh, this thing sucked, man. I hate those things. Yeah. They're terrible. I hate looking at him. Yep. Can come to something else really.
01:54:54
Speaker
One time when I was, oh gosh, I must have been in my early 20s.
01:55:02
Speaker
We went to, my girlfriend and I at the time went to Six Flags Great America outside of Chicago, obviously one of the Six Flags parks. And we wanted to go two days in a row because we had bought season passes. So we wanted to stay and I didn't have much money. So there's an extended stay close there. And so we, you know, it was like 35 bucks a night or whatever for a reason, by the way.
01:55:29
Speaker
But, uh, we go, we check in, we go up to the room, we open the door and there's an old man wearing an oxygen mask on the bed in the room that we were just given. You know, funny, you should mention that Gabe. One time I was in an extended stay and this man and his, his, his lady came in and I was just sitting there with my oxygen mask on. I couldn't breathe very well. Are you telling me?
01:55:56
Speaker
Mr. Russell, that was you. You were the gentleman in the extended stay. It might've been me or Paul. Uh, okay. Well, not dad though. Dad's gone. Dad's gone. Yeah. Dad's been gone for awhile, huh? What? Um, and then the next morning on our way to the park, we were pulling around and there was a corner on site. Somebody died at that extended stay the night before. Wasn't the guy that was, it wasn't now, but, uh,
01:56:25
Speaker
Yeah, I, uh, I'm a proud Marriott boy these days. Uh, I don't, um, I don't fuck around with my hotels anymore. Put that on the list of clubs that Gabe belongs to. We've, we've got the Mormon church. Marriott boy. He's, he's a Marriott, uh, somebody keep note of this out there. He's, he's a Marriott rewards member and he's a member of the Mormon church.
01:56:50
Speaker
We know this. I'm a member of the Church of Jesus Christ. Oh, it's Latter-day Saints. That's right. That's the whole fucking thing that got us on it. Yeah. God, I remember those commercials all the time. Mm hmm. Oh, back to Wayne. This is we got a lot. Wayne Huizinga, through his assistance, declined numerous requests for an interview in previous press. Thank you. I'm not talking about shit. Mm hmm. No, I guess if I could take my say and twist it, you fucking bitch.
01:57:19
Speaker
Like I'll twist your nuts. Yeah, it was like, I twisted Millwood's fucking balls. And previous press accounts, however, he has referred to his childhood as. God damn it, man. I used to think I was a pretty well read fellow, but as. What is a stir add discipline as a stir stir stir. Oh, no, austere austere. Yeah. Yeah.
01:57:48
Speaker
and upbringing structured by the family's membership in the strict Dutch Christian Reformed Church. So that sounds really fucking fun. The Dutch Christian Reformed Church. Yeah, I would imagine it's got a lot of German influence, very puritanical. It would explain a lot of the nut twisting, I think. Yeah. A more objective
01:58:17
Speaker
description of his early years would include the words miserable, chaotic, and dangerous. Heisinga's father, Harry, Harry Heisinga, was the fourth and final son of a Dutch immigrant named Harm Heisinga. First do no harm. H-A-R-M, Harm Heisinga, who founded Chicago's first garbage hauling company in 1894.
01:58:44
Speaker
Shunning the family business, Harry became a carpenter and eventually a home builder, we know this. Wayne, born in 37, his sister Bonnie, five years later, and they live in the suburbs of Chicago. Harry was not an easy man to live with. In a divorce petition filed in 1954, Jean Heizenga accused her husband of ongoing mental and physical abuse.
01:59:12
Speaker
that eventually landed her in a mental hospital. Sure. Like Dan Conner's mom, Roseanne. There you go, yes, yep. He did. Maybe Dan Conner is based off of H. Wayne. And then Harry is Ed, who's Crystal. Let's find out, huh? Joyce Van Der Wagen.
01:59:42
Speaker
Is that a real name? Did he really? No, no, no, no. That's one of H. Wayne's wife's names. Oh, okay. Yeah, yeah. What a god. That sounds like some fucking bitch name, doesn't it? He would demand, so this is back to Harry. Harry would demand sex, and when she did not comply, he beat her, she stated. Sure, harm. Harry did harm, you know.
02:00:11
Speaker
Harry tried no fuck it. Yeah, that's fine. Police records indicate that she filed a complaint alleging that Harry terrorized her on New Year's Eve 1953 Could you imagine if you knew this and you saw Wayne out to somewhere in Florida? You said hey Wayne How about New Year's Eve 1953? What you would fucking do to him 60 16 year old H Wayne
02:00:40
Speaker
at home. It's 53. You got to assume they don't have a television in the house. He's in the room listening to the radio and turning it up progressively more and more to drown out the sound of his dad beating his mom. He'd probably, he would probably, you know what? Fuck you, buddy. I got a job for you. I respect a son of a bitch like that. Or hire you or eat nuts. Sure. It's also, I mean, look,
02:01:08
Speaker
Based on what we know so far, it could very well be that he turned the radio down and was just in the room jacking off to the sound of his father beating his mother. No, no, I didn't. It's all about coming. Didn't take that one into account. I suppose it's impossible though. Look at his face. Tell me that's not a man that gets off on the abuse of women. I think we're finding out a lot of things here. I don't think we're finding out a lot of things here.
02:01:39
Speaker
So She files complaint 1953 New Year's He's moving the family to Florida Hoping to salvage the marriage and make a killing in the Florida real estate market both plans failed I'm gonna go out on the limb and tell you if you're simultaneously planning to make a killing in a real estate and save your marriage You're probably gonna fuck up both of them Bingo, I don't think you're gonna do those things in concert
02:02:06
Speaker
On July 26, 1954, a deputy from the Broward County Sheriff Department arrived at the family's modest home off the federal highway to serve a complaint filed by Jean Heizenga, accusing Harry of extreme cruelty and seeking a divorce after 18 years of marriage. The deputy left the papers with 15 year old Wayne. So the deputy leaves the papers with Wayne.
02:02:37
Speaker
The divorce unfolded in a flurry of nasty motions that laid bare the extent of the brutality in the hazinga home. This past July, he came into the room, Gene recounted in court, and when I asked him not to wake the children and go back into his own room, he hit me. He walked around the other side of the bed and he hit Bonnie, and when Wayne came to the door to try to stop him from hitting me, he hit him. He hit Wayne too. I don't think we ever get one night's sleep around here.
02:03:06
Speaker
That's young Wayne how they wear get one night sleep around this motherfucking place what young Wayne testified Here he was always getting up in the middle of night and he would come in the bedroom and monkey around with my mother and wake us all up That son of a bitch he pushes down on the floor hit mother Bonnie and myself that fucking cocksucker I'm gonna put it in the fucking trash you hear him hear him what he calls his mom mother
02:03:31
Speaker
That's weird. There's something wrong with people to do. It's weird. That's why I know it might be a times a time sign of the time. No, he, like my mother, but like you're calling her mother. There's something, there's something loose, man. There's something loose. What about the man that calls his wife mother?
02:03:51
Speaker
You, that's a real fucking, the man who calls his wife mother is, is former Indiana governor and vice president Mike Pence. Yes. Yeah. He's a piece of shit. Come on mother. We have to stop these abortions. Come along mother. I have to ejaculate soon. Come on mother. We must go and make sure these ladies are mothers as well. Wesley.
02:04:20
Speaker
Do bring me my mother. Leslie, do bring me my abortion. That one was a stretch, folks. Sorry about that. I just wanted to hear the music. Do it again. Fuck it.
02:04:45
Speaker
Streaks on the china, never mattered before Who cares, when you dropkick your jacket As you came through the door, no one glared But sometimes you skip time around and no one stayed
02:05:03
Speaker
Oh man, let's look out below. There's a change in the status quo. Whoa, whoa, whoa. This Heizigas stuff is so dark. We just needed a small break. Yeah, so go to the child molesting fucking Belvedere, much lighter.
02:05:32
Speaker
Thank you, Lynn Aloysius. Yeah, let's lighten it up. Let's do the pedophile bit. Much better. Back to eight, Wayne. Okay. After the divorce, the rank order dragged on for several years. Harry, who had buried himself in debt building three homes he couldn't subsequently sell, was reprimanded by a judge for failing to make child support payments. Jean also accused him of breaking into her home and assaulting a male friend of hers. Sure.
02:06:02
Speaker
Harry retaliating by attempted to have custody of his children transferred to his relatives in Chicago, accusing his ex-wife of being a mentally unstable adulterer. The couple eventually remarried in 1978. What the fuck? Oh my God. Okay. Well, they're fucking crazy, aren't they? Out of their fucking minds. This Dutch bullshit.
02:06:31
Speaker
It probably does have a lot to do with the Dutch, right? Mm-hmm. Like the, uh, Defage, uh, like from Goldmember. Uh-huh. Smokin' a pancake. Pipin' the Kmape. Uh, Isenga was apparently adept at masking the turmoil. Pinecrest High teachers and classmates remember him as a happy, popular kid who played center on the football team, served as senior class treasurer. He had the same fucker that money.
02:06:59
Speaker
and made decent grades. Huizengo is undoubtedly among the least wealthy at Pine Crest, which at the time was the area's only prep school. While one of his classmates was given a Rolls Royce for his 16th birthday, the future multi-millionaire shared an unreliable 1939 Pontiac with a friend. How do you share a car with a friend? I don't know.
02:07:30
Speaker
Monday, Wednesdays, Fridays, Tuesdays, Thursdays, Saturdays, I don't know. I guess. Um, well then on Sundays you just drive together to church and that's it. After graduating, Heizenga went to Chicago where he drove a bulldozer for several months in 1956. Did he share that with a friend too or just, was that just him? I imagine it's a one seater. Okay. All right.
02:07:58
Speaker
In 1956, he enrolled at Calvin College, a small Christian reform school in Michigan. Are you familiar with Calvin? Not off the top of my head, but we're going to find it right now. Calvin College. I'm sure everything's fine there. Oh, friend, it makes a lot of sense, honestly. I, without giving away too much about how, where, where I live, um, I,
02:08:28
Speaker
Cowan College is in Grand Rapids, Michigan, which is about 45 minutes away from me. And there's a huge Dutch population in this part of the state. Huge Dutch population here. That makes a lot of sense. He dropped out after a year and a half. In September 1959, he enlisted in the Army Reserve.
02:08:50
Speaker
He was on active duty for six months long enough to complete his training. Would you like to know what the, uh, the slogan of Calvin colleges, what's now Calvin university? Is it, I don't know. It is my heart. I offer to you, Lord, promptly and sincerely.
02:09:19
Speaker
That's nice. Wayne Hisinga. Yeah. Had a year and a half of that and said, the fuck with this. As he's grabbing them by the balls. You can have my heart, but your fucking nuts are mine, Lord. He dropped out a year and a half. He's in the army. He gets married. Next year, everybody's back to Fort Lauderdale, where he finally gravitated to an industry that commanded his interest. Garbage.
02:09:50
Speaker
The first time John Leech saw his friend Wayne Teizenga drive past in a garbage truck, his heart sank. I thought, oh God, I better hit the books. It must be pretty rough out there. Poor Wayne's already driving a garbage truck, recalls Leech, a Pinecrest alum, who is now a vice president at Smith Barney in Fort Lauderdale. Poor Wayne was actually on his way to making a killing, though traditionally a service undertaken. Oh Jesus.
02:10:20
Speaker
Though traditionally a service undertaken by blacks, waste disposal was a no-miss proposition in the Broward County of the early 1960s.
Huizenga's Business Tactics
02:10:30
Speaker
The way people were sitting here, there wasn't anything to do but make money, recalls Wilbert Porter, who along with his son-in-law, John Currington, ran Porter's Rubbish Service, one of the country's first major garbage firms.
02:10:49
Speaker
Not long after joining Pompano Carding, Huizenga came to the same conclusion. For months, he pressed Porter to let him purchase his share of the business so he could start his own company. Porter relented in 1962, selling the young entrepreneur a snub-nosed truck and $500 worth of customers. Huizenga soon parlayed this humble stake into a booming concern. While official legend
02:11:20
Speaker
attributes the transformation to a Herculean work ethic. John Currington recalls it differently. Wayne Bladed Real Smart says Currington, who now owns a bail bond service on Broward Boulevard. These guys all own bullshit fucking deals. You know that? It's Florida. It's all bullshit. With the exception of like a 50 square mile, no more like 15 square mile stretch in the middle of Florida.
02:11:50
Speaker
The rest of the state is complete bullshit. That sounds right. Um, he stole meetings at the back of this redneck bar in Hollywood. I remember those real well because me and my father-in-law were the only blacks there. Rain when ran the meetings and he was always pressing my father-in-law for money to help pay for some lawsuits against the County several hundred dollars a week.
02:12:17
Speaker
He would put forward these legalities to the group and a few of his close associates would, amen. If you didn't understand what was going on, you didn't ask questions. Sounds like the mob. And my father-in-law was not a man with much formal education. You might say those demands and pressure was one of those things that got to be too much for Wilbur and he sold out. Yeah, you're welcome to this, the Dutch mob. We have many chocolates and trash tits. It's good, you like?
02:12:47
Speaker
They do the, the trash tits in the Dutch mob. Um, Wilbur Porter now 84 years old says he remembers attending the meeting size angle lead and making regular payments for legal costs. But he says the primary reason he sold out was another looming pressure. Organized crime. There it is. Here we go. All right. Wilbur's going to spill the fucking beans. What we need here, friends, pals.
02:13:16
Speaker
Uh, those of you, uh, network or streaming execs out there is, uh, like a six part documentary on the life of Wayne Hyzinga on HBO max. Uh, you just get on it as soon as possible. Yeah, that'd be pretty good watching. Make sure, uh, to get the Dutch mob in there and Wilbur Porter. Oh yeah. Lint chocolate is very delicious. We like it very much. It's where we keep our trash tits.
02:13:47
Speaker
Somebody's gonna make a lot of money on trash tits. I think so. Some big shots from up north. Syndicate guys had come down, Porter recalls. I could see what was going to happen. The big fishes were gonna eat the little fishes. So I got out. Are they Swedish fishes? Ja. Yeah, we are part of the Syndicate. That's what we do. We are Swedish fish and then chocolate and trash tits. The Swedish Syndicate. Smoking a pancake.
02:14:16
Speaker
Before long, it was Heizenga who was the biggest fish around. By 1969, his single truck had become a fleet with his father-in-law and his partners. He had launched a half a dozen garbage collection companies with routes that stretched from Key West to Tampa. These early years set two precedents for Heizenga.
02:14:42
Speaker
Mm-hmm. They showed him the remarkable profit to be made by consolidating a small fragment industry and they gave vent to his obsessive work habits Wayne dated a woman who worked for the same company I did remembers John leech his high school friend This would have been when he was in his mid 20s His business was doing quite well, and I remember one time this woman told me where Wayne had taken her on their last date He had taken her out to see the pigs that ate the garbage he collected and
02:15:19
Speaker
Yeah, damn it Given this guy. Yeah, huh? Let's go this fucking guy. Hey, hey, come on you bitch. Let's go look at the pigs You're gonna see the pigs eat the fucking trash You suck my big drawer out there. It's a fantastic night for for pig watching and dick sucking. I
02:15:38
Speaker
Yeah, I'll take my fucking wood shoe to your ass. Do me a favor, Toads. Take out your trash tits. Get them trash tits out. I want to see that C and I want that A in my fucking eye. Get that? Cause eye, that's like a letter too. Yeah, I got it. Alright, that's probably good.
02:16:00
Speaker
Given his father's business failings and the toll they extracted from the family, it's not hard to trace the source of Hisenga's drive. Unfortunately, this drive seems to have limbed down a familiar path when it came to his domestic life. In August 1966, six years after they were married, Hisenga's wife, Joyce, filed for a divorce. In her complaint, she accused Hisenga of extreme cruelty.
02:16:28
Speaker
Wait, cruelty. Oh my gosh. And the cats in the cradle and the silver. The apple doesn't fall far from the tree, as they say. How? How? God damn fucking just... If you were him, and you were really being honest with yourself, after seeing all that when you grow up and just re-fucking doing that, how's that gotta make you feel?
02:16:56
Speaker
I think there's a level of complete sort of, it's completely beyond your control if you internalize some of that stuff at a young enough age and your brain just
02:17:15
Speaker
eats it up and doesn't think anything of it except that this is what you do, right? Like if we raised our kids from birth to eat trash like pigs do, right? Or have an appreciation for trash tits. I was gonna say trash tits. Yeah, then they will, right? Like there's just a,
02:17:45
Speaker
If it's young enough and frequent enough, then the impression is going to be set. It's like, you know, when, when the, um, when the baby bird is born and the mother's not around and it imprints on the human that's there and follows the human around, right? Like you've seen those, those videos of ducks following people around because the imprint on them, it's just, I've raised several ducks. Oh yeah. Like 12. No shit. Yeah. I love it. And then I fucking fry them up and eat them.
02:18:17
Speaker
You see a game when you dip a duck in oil, it becomes something much greater than itself. Oh man, I just walked directly into it, just as slow motion. You bit that hard. Yeah, I dove headfirst into the vat of oil, as it were. Oh yeah. Oh, it's delicious. It appears I'm the greasy one.
02:18:45
Speaker
Oh, moving on. I'm sorry. I didn't mean to sidetrack you there. Really very well done. No, that was just my point. It's just that like, it's the cycle of abuse, right? Like, you know, abusers abuse. Yeah. Or the abused abuse. Hurt people hurt people. The cats in the cradle. I think that's in the silver spoon. Little boy blue, a man in the moon. When you coming home, dad,
02:19:15
Speaker
I don't know when, but we'll get together then. Dad. Well, I'm glad you mentioned that game. You know, dad, dad took care of us. He really did. I'm sure he did. Rick took care of you real well. But will you please put the head streamers away, please? Oh, I forgot about the ass shaving. God.
02:19:44
Speaker
Oh god. The particulars of his alleged conduct detailed in Joyce's divorce petition bore a chilling similarity to the accusations Jean Heizenga had lodged against Heizenga's father a decade earlier. Only a decade. So this is... god. That the defendant insults the plaintiff in front of friends that on one occasion the defendant physically abused the plaintiff by picking up a chair and hitting her with it.
02:20:14
Speaker
Wonder if he hit her in the head or the back. Well, you would think like, uh, I would imagine first it was the, the top of the chair in the gut between the ribs and then in the back after they doubled over in pain. That's a traditional way to do it. Now, Wayne, you can't be doing any more unprotected shots to the head on that bitch wife of yours. You hear me? Huh? Um, the defendant. That's okay, Blake. That's okay. I never raised a hand at Jan.
02:20:45
Speaker
Your angel? She's with Doc now. That the defendant twisted the plaintiff's arm and made it black and blue. And then on another occasion, the defendant backed out of the driveway and almost ran over the plaintiff. Jesus Christ. Joyce Isenga noted that her husband also accused her of adultery and of being an unfit mother for their two young sons. So that does answer a question for me because I was, you know,
02:21:15
Speaker
She says how he almost ran her over. And I was thinking to myself, surely Wayne isn't the type of man if he has a traffic incident. He's not going to probably do it himself. He's going to be like, hey, driver, this asshole cut us off three and a half miles ago. Pull that motherfucker over and take care of him. You know, something like that. Without question. Yeah. He's not going to do it himself. He'd have the driver do it.
02:21:44
Speaker
What do you think his instructions would sound like though if he did? Here's what you're gonna do. I don't care how long it takes. You get them out of the car. You reach down. You put your hand into the shape of a claw. And you grab hold.
02:22:09
Speaker
I don't care if it's a man or a woman, you grab between the legs and you squeeze as hard as you fucking can. That's it. This is just cold and ruthless. At a court-ordered hearing, she elaborated on her marital woes, describing her husband as a workaholic whose open derision was largely responsible for her shattered nerves.
02:22:39
Speaker
One night when we were eating dinner, our baby was in the hospital. Jesus. Our baby was in the hospital and I was kind of upset because we didn't know what was wrong with him. I was kind of upset. Yeah. Okay. Baby's in the hospital, kind of upset, but we're having dinner anyway. And we didn't know what was wrong with him. She recounted and
02:23:10
Speaker
Wayne, their son Wayne, would not eat his dinner and Wayne, the father, started hollering at him and telling him to eat his dinner and I asked him if he would just not holler. I said I was upset because the baby wasn't feeling well and I pulled our son's stool a little closer to me and he slid off the edge of it and Wayne picked up the stool and hit me with it and he hit me and twisted my arm.
02:23:43
Speaker
Carol Jones, who had married Wayne Heizenga's mother after a divorce from Harry, testified on Joyce's behalf, portraying Wayne as an uncaring man who seemed to take pleasure in humiliating his young wife. The girl had two kids, Jones said. She needed help. She needed a little affection. She needed a lot of things that he wasn't giving her. Heizenga did not testify at the hearing or dispute the divorce. Jesus fuck.
02:24:13
Speaker
Highs anger in there God damn it my cute cue the fucking tech issue from this point forward Okay, we're all right funny you should drop that Gabe Five years later he were married this time to a secretary in one of his company's southern sanitation service and
02:24:41
Speaker
So he's marrying a secretary, his trash company. Always a good idea. He later adopted his second wife, Marty's two children. Sure. It's very like a much of Bif Tannen vibe I'm getting. Oh, big time Bif Tannen bullshit here. Yes. Absolutely. Perfect. I wonder how long it took for him to get Marty new tits.
02:25:03
Speaker
trash tits. As a matter of fact. You know, she's got a couple, this is a really full seize of what I'd like to see, Doc. If we could give it, give me a small B and a large D and we'll have a great set of trash tits here, Doc. I'd be coming all day. God, the best stuff just happens. It really does.
02:25:34
Speaker
By the 1970s, Hizenga was itching to expand. So was Dean Buntrock, whose name isn't fake at all. Dean Buntrock, who had wed one of Hizenga's cousins and taken over the family Chicago-based garbage company. Aish Scavenger Service. A-S-S, by the way. Aish Scavenger Service. That's ass. Yes, it is. Like Hizenga Buntrock.
02:26:04
Speaker
was an ambitious young Turk who saw the riches that lay in cornering the country's vast waste collection market. So basically, Huizenga and this man pair up to create waste management and take it public. But Rock wants to build the nationwide sanitation corporation. Huizenga is basically there to snapchup as much of the competition as possible.
02:26:34
Speaker
uh, during one stretch of 1972, Chris crosses the US buying out 90 haulers in nine months. 90 haulers. That's a lot of hollers. It is. Um, they call it a blitzkrieg, which helped establish a strategy that would characterize his career as a deal maker. Moving blitzkrieg, but rock. Yeah. I gave your wife little blitzkrieg, but rock last night.
02:27:03
Speaker
Move in quickly pay with stock rather than borrowed cash and retain key management personnel. That's how you do it In the next decade Waste management emerges the industry's leader parents hundreds of subsidiaries Not only in the u.s. But across the globe revenue swelled to the billions much attributed to hazinga and butt rock
02:27:31
Speaker
Huizenga is the president from 1971 until 1982 at waste management and he becomes the vice chairman of the board of directors And leaves the firm in 1984 But Several years afterwards carries on as a paid consultant. Of course. There's nothing more I want in life and become a paid consultant to my own company If I could do that, I'm gonna be living the fucking dream man. I
02:28:01
Speaker
Isn't it fascinating that it's even an option that it's a legal thing? It's so great. When, when can you start paying me to consult for this show? Uh, that's totally up to whenever Don and Paul decide to start giving us money for this shit. I would like you guys to start paying me and I will, uh, give you ideas. Perfect. And that's it. Yeah. Um, so let's see.
02:28:30
Speaker
Oh, he's a major stockholder too. So it's about buying things, owning them, getting your tentacles into them and then getting rid of them. But yet you still make cash off of them based off of what you set up when you did buy it. Does that make sense? Perfect. No, that's exactly right. Yes.
02:28:54
Speaker
which is what he did with the fucking Marlins. He made money on that goddamn stadium until late 2012. It's so great. Because he got like 30% of this and 90% of that. And the guy's a pretty fucking savvy businessman regardless of his less than sterling personal reputation. Yeah, well, you tend to find that you have one set of those characteristics and you probably aren't going to have the other because we're
02:29:24
Speaker
We're archetypes, really. There it is. We want to be everything to everyone and that makes us just almost nothing. And we are what we are. He was a Dutch fucking bastard is what he was. That's what we used to call Dutch masters, by the way, if you ever smoke a Dutch master.
02:29:52
Speaker
No, um, so that's interesting. I know what you're talking about. I know what it is. I, the, I just, um, my mom was a smoker. My grandma was a smoker. They both had really serious issues with it. I've never smoked anything. No, this wasn't like a, uh, this was, this was like 18 year old boys in the back of the grocery store. They worked at ironically smoking cigars and things of that nature. Like there was nothing serious. We were,
02:30:20
Speaker
You know, fuck, we got in trouble because the whole goddamn grocery store was filled to smoke one time. I can't, I can't even like, I can't even inhale like vape shit without like going into like I can't do it. So, um, when, when, when I imbibe in anything, it's usually, uh, um, an edible, which is enough of.
02:30:42
Speaker
a commentary on who I am as a person. So, you know, Dutch, Dutch masters. That's just a little shout out to nasty Nate and, um, all, all the boys out there, the commission himself, Houston Strangler, et cetera. Um, nobody knows what the fuck you're talking about, Blake. There's like two people that the Houston Strangler knows and nasty Nate knows. And that's fucking enough, Gabe. Yeah, you're right. All right, guys.
02:31:09
Speaker
By the time he relinquished his management role, he graduated from a small time businessman to a major league magnate. And short, uh, waste management made Wayne Heizenga what he is today. He Heizenga speaks proudly of his tenure at the helm. He reassured reporters who questioned him about the garbage industries, unsavory reputation that they quote. We ran a clean shop.
02:31:41
Speaker
There is ample evidence to suggest otherwise. Dozens of state and federal investigations, lawsuits, and press accounts indicate that waste management ran a profit-obsessed conglomerate that was not averse to employing Heizenga's standby tactic. When met with resistance, grab your competition by the balls and twist.
02:32:05
Speaker
This fucking guy. Holy shit. Like it's just the, the shame doesn't exist. Like the older he gets the less shame exists. That's how it works. The authors of 19 of a 1991 Greenpeace report about the history of waste management. One concluded to create an empire. The company has mixed business acumen and foresight with strong doses of deception, corruption, and monopolism.
02:32:32
Speaker
The San Diego District Attorney's Office seconded this impression in a scalding 1992 report that reviewed Waste Management 1's history of environmental problems and alleged public corruption. The transgressions cataloged in these reports include everything from bribery to death threats. Waste Management had commissioned lengthy responses to rebut these documents, which the company characterizes as filled with inaccuracies
02:32:59
Speaker
that are intentional and designed to malign waste management one. It's kind of like Turner out to kill me. That's correct. These are these accuracies are intentional and designed to destroy me and kill me. The garbage business has long been associated with the underworld. The reason is simple. With little to differentiate one hauler from the next mob specialties such as price fixing,
02:33:28
Speaker
Predatory pricing and thuggery often have been employed to protect established territory and ensure a healthy profit. You got to protect the territory, right Gabe? Well, it's really something it's, it's interesting. Like I, I, I think at first glance, when you think about what, why, why the mob were involved in, in sanitation.
02:33:56
Speaker
My first inkling there is, oh, well, you know, if there are things that they need to get rid of, if they own, they own the means of production, so to speak, they own the, the landfills, whatever, rightly, they can get rid of things easily. And I'm sure that's just a symptom of the bigger picture. But, you know, I recently moved to a new, a new city and there's like, we can choose from like five or six different waste management companies for both.
02:34:26
Speaker
garbage pickup and recycling pickup here, right? And interestingly enough, all of the pricing across the board is within $5 of each other. Yeah. Right. And so it's never something that I really put two and two together on until, you know, about three minutes ago. But yeah, interesting. It's just a competitive market up there.
02:34:54
Speaker
Yeah, very competitive here in rural Dutch, Michigan. Yeah, you know, I was just thinking about it. I just it seems me like, you know, be on it so you can dump bodies and shit. That's what I would think. But yeah, probably a lot of the money part of it. This is. This is fucking perfect here. Hizenga has repeatedly denied any association with organized crime
02:35:24
Speaker
Their reputation comes from your part of the country up north. He told a New York Times reporter some years ago. That comes from yanks, not me. I'm just a, I'm a hard working, uh, fucking Dutch man. There's no such thing as the, uh, the mafia, uh, in the, the Dutch religion, uh, or, or, or, or, or, or nationality. Uh, uh, we don't have, uh,
02:35:52
Speaker
Organized crime as Dutch folks. We don't believe in it. We believe in chocolate and trash tits and Swedish fish. And wooden shoes. And wooden shoes. Windmills, too. A lot of windmills. A lot of those. Yep. Almond cookies. Mm. Speck you loose. Those hats. Mm. Dutch boy haircuts. Dutch boys. Dutch boys. Yep. Dutch women. Putting your finger in a dike. Dutch ovens.
02:36:25
Speaker
We have a winner. He was apparently unaware of the resume of co-founder Dean Bunrock in 1960, the Wisconsin... You think Dean Dutch Oven BJ on a regular basis? Say that again. Do you think Dean Dutch Oven BJ on a regular basis? His wife. Oh, it was BJ's wife? Yeah, that's a Heisinga, BJ Heisinga. Yeah, I would say maybe.
02:36:55
Speaker
I was thinking more like, you know, the Dutch have any bake in the oven, like with the... Oh, no, I was talking about farting on our tubbers and holding her head there. That's just vile. I've heard your fart saying five times now. I don't need that in my ears, okay? It's 11.36 PM. Sounds like a fucking trumpet. Call me Louis Armstrong.
02:37:23
Speaker
how you can Xavier Woods. That's a trombone. Fucking worthless wrestlers, what that is. Wisconsin Attorney General accused Bunt Rock and 11 other officials of unfair business practices as a result of their haulers efforts to infiltrate the Milwaukee trash market. The company's alleged tactics detailed in a 1962 civil suit filed by the attorney general, including threatening physical harms,
02:37:52
Speaker
to the owners of competing firms and their families and destruction or damage to their property and equipment. The Milwaukee. See, that says everything it needs to say, right? If you're talking about a legitimate business or a legitimate set of businesses, do you word it as they were unable to penetrate the Milwaukee trash market? No. No.
02:38:21
Speaker
No, you don't. No, you do not. The Milwaukee Circuit Court issued an injunction against the companies, which remained in effect for eight years. Buntrock's Ace Scavenger Service, ASS, is now near 2-4, was also a member of the Chicago Trade Association that was sued in 1972 for price fixing and harassing competitors.
02:38:47
Speaker
The trade group settled the suit by paying a $50,000 fine and agreeing to not engage in these practices for five years. All right, we won't price fix for five years. Are you fucking kidding me? I promise we won't break the law for five years. Give us five years. After five years, we'll do it again. But for the next five, we're good. We'll be fine.
02:39:14
Speaker
In 1972, the waste management poorly paid $1.7 million in its own stock to a man named Louis Visco in exchange for universal byproducts, a Los Angeles based concern. According to the San Diego District Attorney's report, Visco had been the target of repeated organized crime investigations. He never was indicted.
02:39:43
Speaker
In 1979, waste management began efforts to buy SCA. At the time, the nation's third largest refuse company and one wildly reported to have employed known mafiosa. Though the federal government intervened for a fear of monopoly was in the works, waste management eventually gained control of many SCA subsidiaries. As per company policy, waste management retained many of SCA's managers. It's because they know how to manipulate all the bullshit.
02:40:15
Speaker
Um, let's see here. Given the nature of the trash industry is perhaps inevitable that an enterprise as massive as waste management would occasionally associate with mob figures. But the authors of the San Diego district attorney's office report pointed to the criminal violations, such as price fixing, bid rigging, and predatory pricing, all designed to increase revenues by eliminating competition and went on to observe.
02:40:43
Speaker
The definition of organized crime is generally assumed to be merely another term for the Mafia or traditional organized crime families.
Dutch Mafia and Waste Management
02:40:52
Speaker
However, now the term organized crime may be applied to many criminal enterprises with divergent interests. Any enterprise which is organized to circumvent the law for profit may be properly described as an organized crime.
02:41:06
Speaker
The report revealed that as of 1992, waste management along with its subsidiaries and employees had faced antitrust lawsuits and or government investigations in 17 states. You ready for this? I am. You ready for this? Yes. There's a website dedicated to this entirely, but we're starting to piece stuff together. And yes, we were making jokes about the Dutch mafia, but
02:41:38
Speaker
Someone asked an expert on this website about Dutch history in the United States, did the Dutch have their own mafia? I'm sure there was a decently sized Dutch presence in America during the time that the mob was really big. The answer here, an interesting story are the Dutch garbage men of Chicago, who were sometimes referred to as the Dutch mafia.
02:42:05
Speaker
They started in this business around 1900. One of the reasons being that as staunch Protestants, they didn't want to work for American bosses who wanted them to work on Sunday. In 1900, 75 Dutchmen were working as garbage haulers in Chicago. And by 1930, they ran nearly all of it. Many were related. They were intermarried and attended the same churches. In the 1920s, they came under pressure to join the mafia affiliated Teamsters Union with gangsters using strong arm tactics.
02:42:34
Speaker
but their church leaders were strongly against secular unions. In 1929, to counter the union pressure, Dutch garbage men started the Chicago Suburban Scavengers Association to protect themselves and to keep out competition. The association mediated in disputes between members and rather startling for a group with a staunchly Protestant membership served beer at the monthly meetings.
02:43:01
Speaker
In the 1960s, the Italian mafia tried to take over the lucrative business. William Dodano formed the American scavenger service and strong armed many Chicago business in taking his services. But the association had a Trump card that controlled the garbage dumps and would not service non association trucks. So the mafia trucks resorted to illegal dumping. This combined with sloppy service.
02:43:25
Speaker
which turned off customers, a lack of legal business acumen, and criminal investigations urged by a press strongly in support of the association soon brought the mafia to his knees, although they launched their own $1.5 million lawsuit against the association claiming price-fixing, collusion, and violation of antitrust laws after four years they withdrew the lawsuit, having already sold their companies to the Dutch. The Dutch mafia had beaten the real mafia.
02:43:55
Speaker
Yeah, of course. We have all the pancakes, and the crepes, and the shoes, and the trash tits. And Swedish, don't forget the Swedish Fritzen along with the chocolate. Do you really think we would not win? It's so great. And of course we have the Van Buren boys as well. Yes, our seventh president, is that correct? That's correct, seventh president.
02:44:23
Speaker
Let's see. Let me find my place back here. Sorry about that. It was just too perfect. No, you're good. I was moving forward. I think I moved too far forward. Here we go. That's what I want. Basically, we have about a million instances, like a lot of things we've talked about with their organized crime dealings and linking to that.
02:44:53
Speaker
More disturbing than waste management's disregard of fair business practice has been its disregard of environmental laws. As of 1992, some 45 waste management owned or operated waste sites had been tagged by state and or federal regulators as being out of compliance. Five had been shut down. The company has paid millions of dollars in fines and out-of-court settlements.
02:45:18
Speaker
A 1989 SEC report noted that waste management had admitted it was being investigated in 89 separate cases involving polluted sites on the federal Superfund cleanup list. Greenpeace calls waste management one of the world's biggest polluters. According to that organization's 1991 report, waste management paid an estimated $45 million in fines and settlements during the 1980s.
02:45:45
Speaker
because waste management and its subsidiaries violate environmental laws so persistently because the effects of these violations could take years to detect because regulation has historically been so lax it is difficult to gauge the magnitude of the ecological damage the garbage behemoth has inflicted. So essentially you have waste management, there's millions and millions in lawsuits and
02:46:14
Speaker
I guess the two components there are the crime, the pollution, it's corrupted. I think it's safe to say that, you know, there's some dirty business going on at waste management. We'll kind of can tell that story a million times over, but what we probably, because we know about the trash tits, we want to know about the tapes.
02:46:43
Speaker
and this is how we get to the tapes. The first time Doug Howell sets eyes on the new video rental shop around the corner from his house in New Dallas, he knew it was gonna be a winner. That was the first Blockbuster video. In 1986, Howell invested $600,000 in a partnership formed by his financial advisor to develop three new Blockbuster stores
02:47:13
Speaker
Hal's plan was to maximize the value of these stores and then sell his share and retire early on. Then that gets Mr. Huizenga interested and he says, I'm tired of the weekly commute between Illinois and Florida. So he's gonna sell full time in Fort Lauderdale. Briefly considers retiring, but he's too restless, he starts
02:47:41
Speaker
is bullshit business buying stuff. And then we get interested in Blockbuster. In 1989, Blockbuster bought Scott Beck's share of the video franchise for $119 million. And Beck receives 27 million worth from the Blockbuster stock and joined Blockbuster's Entertainment Corp board of directors. The
02:48:10
Speaker
Where's this guy at? Who the fuck? Sorry, I lost this guy's name. Oh, hell yeah. So basically Doug Howell, the guy that starts up the blockbuster, gets kind of fucked out of his deal here.
02:48:37
Speaker
At the end, there's no seat on the board for Hal, no big payday, and he was cut out of the deal and wound up having to sell his life insurance and borrow money on his credit card to make ends meet. In 1991, he sold his stake in the partnership back to Blockbuster for $491,000 worth of stock. Jesus. Hal sued back in Blockbuster this past September. A Texas judge found the defendants had built
02:49:05
Speaker
Powell in the order they repay the investor a total of 123.5 million. Jesus Christ. What a world.
Blockbuster's Legal and Pricing Strategies
02:49:20
Speaker
After a lengthy trial, Judge Leonard Hoffman further determined that the company officials misrepresented themselves in the prospectus issued in connection with the acquisition and perpetrated a sham
02:49:33
Speaker
In order to avoid federal income taxes, the value of blockbuster stock unlawfully, Hoffman found the testimony of Beck Blockbuster General Counsel Thomas Hawkins and Vice Chairman Steven Burrard not credible. The judge also chided Pierre Peterson Heisinger's old lawyer and friend for rendering a legal opinion that Howe could be excluded from the deal when Peterson stood to gain several million dollars from the transaction.
02:50:02
Speaker
The defendants, Judge Hoffman concluded, engaged in a civil conspiracy to fraud Howe. Such conduct offends the public's sense of justice and propriety. Though Huizenga was never called to the witness stand, Burrard conceded during his testimony that his boss shared responsibility for the deal. On a day-to-day basis was Mr. Huizenga involved? Howe's attorney Michael Gruber asked. In the early outset, yes.
02:50:32
Speaker
Once an agreement was at least reached in principle, then the rest of us took over and followed up on the details. What you have is a very good example of how Blockbuster's principles were able to cash in on the company's mammoth growth by excluding the little people like Doug Howe, concludes Gruber, who says he plans to name Izinga personally in the next lawsuit he files on behalf of two other early investors.
02:51:04
Speaker
So, talks about raising deeper questions about Blockbuster and their patterns of acquisitions. There's complex accounting methods known as a pooling of interests. Are you familiar with that, Gabe? Vaguely. Boosts the value of a business's stock every time it buys out a competitor.
02:51:31
Speaker
So you just keep buying them and keep buying and buying and buying. The pool gets bigger, essentially. That's all. Yeah. The SEC itself investigated Blockbuster in 1990. The agency's concern wasn't pooling, but insider trading of information in the wake of the same deal over which Hal eventually sued.
02:51:54
Speaker
This time, Huizengo was summoned to testify, marking the third time in three years he had been called before the SEC and grilled about insider trading. So three years for Earl Wayne. Three years, three times, three grills, but no birds on the grill. Damn it. Let's see.
02:52:22
Speaker
For plain old consumers, Blockbuster offers a classic example of the Hisenga modus operandi. He targets an industry dominated by mom and pop operations, eliminates the competition by purchasing them or pricing them out of business, then jacks up the fees. There was a time when Blockbuster charged $3 for a three-night movie rental. Today, the rate is $3 for a single night.
02:52:50
Speaker
with an additional penalty for late fees. Remember that bullshit? I do. Paige's home theater for most of the time that I remember all new releases and video games were $2 a night. But that meant $2.10 because of the sales tax in Indiana at the time was 5%. And so I remember
02:53:20
Speaker
all the time, like I would have on top of my dresser, stacks of coins that I'd collected in $2 and 10 cent increments. Oh, nice, yeah. So that I could just pull one off, go get a video game and walk home. That's pretty, yeah, I like that. You got your system, you got it set up. What game would you be getting perhaps
02:53:50
Speaker
Oh, um, I rented, uh, this is going to be very, this is very nerdy. Um, uh, super Nintendo where in time is Carmen San Diego. Oh yeah. I rented that. Um, uh, did that a lot. Uh, Nintendo caveman games. I don't know if you remember that one for regular. Yeah. Um, there was a, one of the games on it. Um,
02:54:20
Speaker
was the wife throw and basically your caveman and you have to go back and forth between A and B as fast as possible. So I would use a spoon, but basically the caveman would go in a circle like this with his wife by the hair. And then when you let go, it's essentially it's javelin except with a woman. I loved caveman games. That was great. I read that a bunch of times.
02:54:49
Speaker
Yeah, between the A and B, so that I didn't hurt my thumb, or it was just like a way to cheat, right? To use the spoon. I'd never done that. To go back and forth between the A and B buttons, yeah. That was before, you know, like your mom would get you the off-brand turbo controller for Christmas. I never had one of those. So you didn't have to. No? I still struggled butt mashing. Yep. Oh gosh. Killer instinct.
02:55:16
Speaker
Don't know that. That's a Super Nintendo game. I think it was on Sega, too. But it was like in the vein of Mortal Kombat, except you were like like creatures. Like there was a lizard guy and a King Kong guy and like like animals. There's a big monkey. Yeah. Playing beating the shit out of each other there. And it's like hyper violent. Like Mortal Kombat is just essentially just a rip off. Right. Mm hmm.
02:55:45
Speaker
Always sports any new baseball game. I probably rented the Ken Griffey Jr. game a dozen times. I didn't never had it.
02:55:53
Speaker
Um, so you rent it and the bitch of it, I'm sure for anybody who rented it after is it had the internal memory for super Nintendo. So when we did change the names of all the people on the teams, it was, it was all our names and people had to go back and change them to what they wanted. Yeah. You and fucking, uh, West Seidelman or whatever. Right. I can't believe you remembered that. That's fantastic. Yeah. West side of my memory and what it used to be.
02:56:22
Speaker
Wes Seidelman, Justin Bazalisco, and those two, who else? I guess it doesn't fucking matter. Oh, Freddie Ames. Oh yeah, yeah. Yeah, Freddie Ames. Didn't he, one time, didn't he, he ate and waited and got father's pizza, didn't he? Say that again, he what? He ate and waited and got father's.
02:56:50
Speaker
It's from the Goonies. It talks about the time he ate and waited at Godfather's. Do you know? And I got a check right now because I just drove by it again the other day and it looked like it was closed. But the last remaining Godfather's Pizza was in Kalamazoo, which is about 45 minutes from me as well. There's a Godfather's Pizza here. Really? Yeah. Why did I think that it was the last? Maybe the last one in Michigan.
02:57:19
Speaker
Ah, that's probably what it was. That's probably what it was. I think it might have closed. But anyway, I love Godfathers. When I was a kid, that was my dad's favorite pizza place too, so we would go there a lot. You know, Godfathers is a pretty good pizza. I don't know why. I don't know. I don't know why it fell down a hard times. I would rent, I remember renting WWE Raw for Super Nintendo a couple of times.
02:57:48
Speaker
This was just before, you know, the end 64 revolution, uh, for wrestling games, obviously, uh, all the, you know, I would get all the wrestling games. I remember, um, gosh, that WCW game. Was it super brawl? Super brawl. Thank you. Yep. Uh, with like the sideways diamond, the diamond shaped ring angle. Yeah. Very interesting there. Um, rented that a lot. It was never any good at it. I owned that one. Did you? Holy shit.
02:58:17
Speaker
That's cool. Um, yeah, the only games that I owned, um, I had, I had, uh, uh, Jordan versus bird forsaken saying a Genesis where you can like do the dunk contest. You can do the three point contest. So disappointing. I think you can play one on one. Yeah. Um, I enjoyed the dunk contest. That was always fun. I enjoyed playing that game. Um, uh,
02:58:49
Speaker
echo the dolphin, God, the most maddening video game of all time. Cause I still don't know what the point of that game was except to swim around. Um, yeah, we could do two or three more hours on this bullshit. Um, but yeah, uh, rented a lot of those games. I rented a lot of, uh, obviously the wrestling tapes as they came in, they would actually order because they knew that I would rent them over and over and over again. They'd order more than they probably normally would.
02:59:18
Speaker
Um, because like my household would account for a decent amount of the stuff that, uh, the rentals that they would get. Um, get more of that wrestling shoot for that weird boy. That's right. That Yocum boy, you gotta, uh, yeah, that's if it says wrestling, just get it. Um, and then like anything that wasn't new release was a dollar a night. Hmm. So a lot of horror movies, a lot of the wrestling stuff, the wrestling stuff never went on the new release wall.
02:59:47
Speaker
It just went directly back to the, the restaurant because it doesn't matter. It doesn't matter. Nobody cares. Seeing that my wrestling tapes went on the new release. I remember, I remember seeing that WrestleMania five tape up on that new release wall. Oh, wow. And that was a beautiful day. When the blockbuster though. So fuck you, Wayne under high Zenga blockbuster experience, jaw dropping growth. The company's corporate culture, however, has changed very little from the early days.
03:00:17
Speaker
Like waste management before it, Blockbuster is run by, I don't fucking even know, Phalanx, Phalanx, whatever. P-H-A-L-A. Phalanx. It's like a... It's like a dick, right? Like a phalanx. Yeah. No, like a phalanx is like an impenetrable army formation.
03:00:41
Speaker
of conservative white men who toil long hours in a highly competitive, profits-first environment. Though company executives have assured the media that they've taken steps to ensure diversity, former employees describe the firm's glass-pandled headquarters in Fort Lauderdale as a boy's club. You buy that? Blockbuster headquarters? Well,
Huizenga's Sports Franchise Ambitions
03:01:08
Speaker
hell yeah. Trash tits all over the place?
03:01:10
Speaker
Everyone come on in we got the trash tits all over boys get the A's and C's over here and the B's and the D's over there For you real freaks we got A's and F's in the back Those ladies have back problems But only on one side they crooked in their lopsided Hizinga himself recently discovered the ultimate way to polish his image He set up camp on the sacred ground of professional sports
03:01:40
Speaker
Which brings us to today and why this all ties together for us. All South Florida sports fans remember how Wayne Heizenga decided in 1990 to pursue a baseball franchise for South Florida and the ecstatic summer day a year later when the keepers of the national pastime blessed our city. But not quite so many recall the contest of that historic announcement.
03:02:05
Speaker
He asked the fans for their advice on christening his new team. The tally wasn't even close. The populace spoke as if with one voice. The name they uttered? Manatees. The Florida Manatees. There you go. Yeah. Heizenga, however, was not about to name his $95 million investment after a fat, slow-moving, nearly extinct sea mammal.
03:02:29
Speaker
with an aptitude by being hacked to pieces by speeding boat propellers. We're not gonna be the South Florida Sea Cows, goddamn it. It's fuckers get caught up by goddamn boat propellers. We're the fucking Marlins. Fuck you. I'm Dutch. Big pointy nose of the trophy fish, goddamn it. The choice was as might be expected based purely on profit motive. That, after all, was the whole point of buying a sports team.
03:02:59
Speaker
As Huizenga explained it to local reporters, a major league team would make ideal attendance at Joe Robbie Stadium, the rarely used venue he co-owned. He also liked the way the numbers looked when it came to the merchandising. Thus, the Marlins were born. With the expansion team, Huizenga was recast as a curious sort of folk hero. His ensuing decisions to lure an expansion hockey franchise, the Florida Panthers, to town
03:03:26
Speaker
Then, to buy the revered Miami Dolphins, vaulted him to the pinnacle of cultural power. In the tradition of the great Roman senators, he was worshipped as the man capable of providing the biggest and brightest circuses for the masses. All across South Florida, Wayne became a one-name entity. He is so well known by his first name that people often mispronounce his last.
03:03:53
Speaker
The correct phonetics, High Zenga, whenever he went adoring crowds gathered at this year's greater Miami chamber commerce banquet to celebrate the opening of the dolphin season. The players were bemused to find that the longest line for autographs belong not to Dan Marino, but to High Zenga. Oldest ride, longest line. That's right.
03:04:19
Speaker
Other than a few stodgy league officials, no one ever so much as a peep about the obvious monopoly Heisinger had established. The local press ceased treating him like a businessman altogether. He was a celebrity. I mean, fuck, I knew who Wayne Heisinger was as a 13-year-old. You're goddamn right you do. And the folk hero wasted no time exploiting his newfound clout.
03:04:46
Speaker
Early last year, he proposed building a 2,600 acre sports entertainment complex on the Dade Broward border. Sports entertainment? Brother. Maybe that's where the performance center ended up. Anchored by his baseball and hockey teams. The planned park was slated to include a 45,000 seat dome stadium for the Marlins, a 20,000 seat arena for the Panthers, two theme parks, movie studios, TV and radio stations,
03:05:15
Speaker
A marine stadium, a sports museum, restaurant, shops, two luxury golf courses, parks, and plenty of space for amateur sports. A Disney World, in essence, for jocks. Sounds like a real aggressive plan. That's a lot of shit. It's a lot of shit. Huizenga assembled a fearsome team of lobbyists and spent thousands wooing local and state politicians.
03:05:43
Speaker
With disconcerting ease, he whipped them into a froth of yes men. The so-called, the so-called Wayne's world. Oh, fuck. Oh, God. Lassoon is right at that time too. Yep. Lassoon held out as a panonesia for a local economy. Panonesia. Thank you. Shining example. A veritable geyser of jobs and tourist revenue.
03:06:11
Speaker
The second chance for South Florida that it turned down Walt Disney when he came courting with plans For what was to become the Disney World theme park in Orlando. I Imagine that's a big big fucking sore spot down there. They pissed away Disney World Doo-doo-doo-doo
03:06:39
Speaker
Without a formal master plan, without disclosing how much public money he expected to extract from the local till, Huizenga managed to secure 438 acres of public land free of charge, as well as a promise that he could set up his own government to run the park. Did you catch that? A promise that he could set up his own government to run the park.
03:07:00
Speaker
Yeah, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's the Disney model. Um, I mean, that was in the news recently with, with, uh, old dipshit down there, whatever his fucking name is. Um, uh, no, no, no, no, no. What's his, the governor of Florida president. Yeah. That guy, um, they, they have a special district in Orlando. So like they,
03:07:25
Speaker
It's a cabal. They can run it however they choose to run it from a tax perspective and everything else. It was an incentive to build. Yeah. Yep. That's all it is. Mm-hmm. Your dog is just staring at you, by the way. Yeah, no, I know. He's been crying for a little over an hour because I think he's got to go outside. Those are some haunting eyes. They are. He's a good boy. You want to take him out? He'll be fine. Get him rambled. All right.
03:07:54
Speaker
Uh, without a formal master plan, blah, blah, blah. Uh, you got four and 38 acres and promise of his own government, um, and a monumental abdication of their regular regulation duties, elected leaders effectively told a private developer, you want to use tax exemption bonds, levy taxes, couldn't them land go right ahead. We won't interfere.
03:08:18
Speaker
Then virtually handed a huge swath of endangered wetlands, in other words, to the man who co-founded the environmental disaster called waste management. The proceedings were carried out with such haste and grandiosity that the whole thing began to felt like a dream. Sure enough, South Florida woke up two months ago to find that Blockbuster Entertainment Corp. no longer existed and that Wayne's World was very much in doubt.
03:08:45
Speaker
H. Wayne Hyzinga's eyes have been compared to many things. Oh, Jesus. Oh, I'm sure they have. You got Marvin nearby? Wake up, you old bitch. Hey. Hey. Oh, what kind of bird are we cooking? Well, H. Wayne Hyzinga's eyes have been compared to many things. Hyzinga. Oh.
03:09:11
Speaker
Back in the 90s, Heisinger and I had our time together. I'll tell you what. Oh boy, when he bought Blockbuster. Oh, he and I went toe to toe. You know, I used to own 20th Century Fox. Is that so? Yeah, I presented that to him with the idea. I said, let's put things together. But you know that Netflix thing, don't you? That was my idea. I went to Heisinger with the idea for it back in 93.
03:09:36
Speaker
You know what he said to me? He said, he said, no, nobody wants to get things in the mail. They want to go out and get it themselves. Dumb motherfucker. They also said that his eyes have been compared to Robin's eggs. That's why we brought you in Marvin specifically. Oh, I'll tell you what.
03:09:58
Speaker
No, you're like a Robin. You know what? It's a funny thing. I do appreciate, as you know, a deep fried bird here and there.
Eccentric Cooking and Humor
03:10:09
Speaker
I've had Robin on many an occasion, but it's not one of my favorites. However, if you want to make yourself the rippinest, most delicious omelet you've ever had,
03:10:22
Speaker
You go outside, you go to the nearest maple tree and you find yourself a nest full of blue, those blue Robin's eggs. Now you gotta, you gotta grab a whole good bunch of them because they're relatively small, but boy, oh boy, you whip them up with some heavy whipping cream and you drop them in the pan. They fluff up like crazy and they taste like mother's milk.
03:10:49
Speaker
I do appreciate how you're always, uh, you, you make sure we know about the creams and the oils. You know, we, you know, we just can't fry up a fucking egg. You have to have, you got to appropriately fucking do it. We'll see what's most important here. Now in a pinch, you can use a 2% or a whole milk. It's not a problem.
03:11:13
Speaker
But the reason you want to use the heavy whipping cream because you want to take that you take the yolk and the white and You drop the the whipping cream in there, but you take a fork don't ever use a whisk I don't care what anybody tells you use a fork doesn't matter what size fork But you put it in there and you whip that shit up until you get a nice froth on the top, right? Before you drop it into the frying pan and once you've dropped in the frying pan with that nice froth
03:11:40
Speaker
All you got to do is move that egg around for three or four minutes, drop the heat a little bit, and you drop the lid onto that pan. Now that Gordon Ramsey shit off and on the fire and get all wet and disgusting. Nobody wants to eat an egg like that in the United States. Nobody likes that shit. That's bullshit. So you put that lid on there for five minutes or so afterwards, and then that makes it just fluff up.
03:12:04
Speaker
fluff up, they fluff up in the pan and you got yourself a nice fluffy soft scrambled egg. And just the beautiful thing about a ramen's egg is that
03:12:18
Speaker
is that you get that earthy flavor because they eat so many worms and things, right? So you get that umami is what they call it these days, I believe, inside the robin's egg. It's just unmatched compared to, you know, if you're into that sort of thing, you know, compared to a chicken. We know you are.
03:12:43
Speaker
and oh boy oh boy exotic birds regular bird doesn't matter just bird me up baby well um i'm gonna try to leave you alone because i'm getting i get a little more than i'm begging for when i've been you sleep marvin all right let's we'll move on we'll i'm sure we'll see marvin next week um we will be in colorado for opening day so i'm sure he'll want to remind us that oh i love color
03:13:11
Speaker
Hway and Izinga's eyes have been compared to many things.
Blockbuster and Viacom Merger
03:13:14
Speaker
Robin's eggs, laser beams, banked fires. They have been described as icy steel, piercing sharp and flat. On the morning of September 29th in an auditorium filled with friends, family, and adoring shareholders, those celebrated blue peepers indulged in a conspicuous bout of public weeping.
03:13:35
Speaker
The event was a specially convened meeting at which Blockbuster shareholders were expected to approve the deal Huizenga had pursued for nine months a merger agreement with cable TV giant Viacom worth a whopping $8 billion. As of October Huizenga owned 15.5 million shares, 8% of Blockbuster. The merger quickly took a backseat however to the real drama which consisted
03:14:05
Speaker
of watching Heizenga bid farewell to Blockbuster. Like Michael Jordan, he was retiring at the top of his game and the ceremony appropriately was being staged at the Broward Performing Arts Center, a venue funded in part by Heizenga's largess. The affair began with a booming voice urging all present to sit, a spotlight sliced through the dark and into the beam stepped Heizenga.
03:14:33
Speaker
He leaned forward, gazing into the teleprompter, his thin lips addressing a pair of microphones coiled before him like trained serpents. For the nearsighted, his image was projected overhead on a giant video monitor. For the hard of hearing, a woman at foot of the stage translated into sign language. Speech Izinga delivered was not, as some later described it, emotional.
03:14:58
Speaker
He merely explained to the several hundred shareholders while trading in their blockbuster stock for Viacom, would net them lots and lots of money. He did manage one moment of unintended authenticity along the way. It came early on. Hisango was talking about his disappointment at the nose drive and the price of Viacom stock. According to his script, when he was supposed to say, when Viacom stock dropped to the low 20s, I was down too.
03:15:27
Speaker
but things have changed. What came out of his mouth was, but things haven't changed. There was a tense silence. Izinga smiled, despite himself, and then whisked on. The merger, he declared, will enable the company to achieve our vision of becoming a fully integrated global entertainment company. We make movies.
03:15:54
Speaker
will enable the company to achieve our vision of becoming a fully integrated global entertainment company. We'll be able to make a movie, put it on our theaters, rent it in our video stores, sell it on our pay per view channels,
03:16:17
Speaker
Show it on our cable networks and play it on our television stations. Do tell. And while we're doing that, we'll publish the book, release the soundtrack and make the video game and sell them in all of our stores. That's right. Then followed thunderous applause. You got that? Got it. So we're just going to do everything.
03:16:46
Speaker
That's what it's about, right? It's about just doing everything. It's an archetype, isn't it? It is an archetype. Yeah. It's, uh, h-w-h-v-k-m, like just that whole kind of, uh, you know, this is what it ends up looking like when like 15 people run the world kind of thing.
03:17:15
Speaker
You know, they own everything and it just sucks. Consolidation. It's everywhere. We were talking about it the other day, you and I. I mean, it's been an ongoing conversation that we've been having for years now but it's just, you know, I got this kid, you got a kid, you got two.
03:17:43
Speaker
The best part of my childhood I think was the process, right? The process of having those stacks of coins on my dresser and taking the walk to the video store or going with my mom to the library and picking the things out, picking the videos, walking back the process, right? Doing stuff. Now the process, correct, now the process has been reduced to
03:18:15
Speaker
walking from my desk, where I clock out from work, four or five paces to my couch, grab the remote control and point it, and everything is there for me. Everything is there. At my fingertips, in a moment's notice, I can do whatever I want. Watch whatever I want, experience whatever I want, and it's not,
03:18:42
Speaker
You know, on its surface, it sounds amazing, right? You got everything. What do you want? It's not better. It's what it's taken away is the problem. It's not what it's given us. It's what it's taken away. You can do anything you want from anywhere you want, Gabe. Isn't that the ultimate? Don't you think it feels like it should be? Are you telling me that there's something about our brains that can't handle that?
03:19:10
Speaker
I'm telling you, I think, I don't know if our brain, it's that our brains can't handle it. I think it's that we know the difference between what we have now and what we had then. And when we're dead, like nobody else will. Right. So like, whether it was better or not, maybe it doesn't matter because when we're dead, nobody will have the experience of both anymore anyway. So.
03:19:39
Speaker
Fuck it. Well, they're going to have this fucking show and our goddamn voices ringing through eternity as as we march on in the face of all this shittiness and those types of things. We will bear witness and remind them that it was better and it will always have been better. And but, you know, as a sobering fact, yes, once we are dead, there will
03:20:08
Speaker
It'd be no longer anybody that remembers that it was better at one time. There's always baseball. A little too much hot dog on that mustard. Hazenga turned to his first visual aid, a video that looked like an MTV product.
03:20:30
Speaker
Rock music pounded, the camera jiggled frantically, and the images of the new corporation's assets, the smiling teeth of Melrose Place, Beavis and Butthead, and Roseanne flashed across the screen. The chairman then talked some more about the numbers. A few sour pusses looked unconvinced, but almost everyone else on hand, including the financial analyst, felt Huizenga had cut his shareholders a good deal.
03:20:59
Speaker
He queued a second video, this one a look back at Blockbuster's achievements. Happy employees waved to the camera, babies clad in Blockbuster colors gurgled obligingly. Louis Armstrong sang, what a wonderful world. Second time, Louis Armstrong made the show. There you go. Then Izinga urged those who hadn't yet cast their votes to do so.
03:21:29
Speaker
The aisle's filled. Go on, dear. Get going. One white-haired woman urged her spouse. We're all here to make a buck, right? Minutes later, Huizenga announced that the merger had been approved handedly. Then he made his closing remarks. It was at this point that he got choked up. I'll miss all of you and all of this very much, he said, as his face stretched into a rubbery grimace. He dabbed his eyes with a hankie.
03:21:57
Speaker
The crowd cooed and many shutters snapped. Huizenga fled to the wings, but reappeared moments later, eerily composed. They got rid of that other guy he explained, referring to his previous weepy incarnation. I don't know where that came from, I will now take questions. The one only worth asking was posed immediately. What's going to happen with Wayne's world?
03:22:23
Speaker
Isenga muttered something about his commitment to the project and said he would make his best pitch to Summer Redstone, the chairman of Viacom, and the man in whose hands the project now rested. He would try to get the matter answered within the next month or so he vowed. The man who had asked the question looked disgusted, but he was quickly forgotten as Isenga invited shareholders to celebrate with him in the lobby.
03:22:47
Speaker
There the multitudes gathered to sip mimosas from fluted glasses and munch on crustless sandwiches. Eager blonde women stood near the exit, handing out commemorative golden blockbuster paperweights. Eager blonde women? Mm-hmm. All right. You know, one of the fucking A's and C's, Gabe. Sure, got it. Izinga waded through the throng, patiently granting for a few seconds to catch each subject. Trash tits is the worst fucking thing.
03:23:17
Speaker
He beamed for the cameras and informed reporters that he would spend the next six months to a year overseeing the folding of Blockbuster into Viacom Then he confided he would search out some new Cinderella company to run Whatever he does next. I want in shouted a man with cream cheese clinging to his mustache That perfect
03:23:44
Speaker
The sentiment was echoed by all of the near shot. Weren't you nervous about the vote? A young woman asked Tizenga. I knew the numbers before I went on stage, he assured her. As he bent the autographs hurt, another cocktail napkin, a commotion sounded behind him. Make way, make way, cried a red-faced man. I've got Wayne's parents here, make way, Wally.
03:24:10
Speaker
Kniff, Hazinga's loyal assistant shoved through the crowd, dragging along two disoriented senior citizens. Oh boy. One beating the other with a stool on the way to the stage. I think the author is about to tie it all together. Harry and Jean Hazinga were here to share their sun-shining moment. First though, they had to run through a gauntlet of reporters. He's been very aggressive all his life, Harry told whoever cared to listen.
03:24:39
Speaker
I knew he'd be a success. He always loved to play with his trucks. Observed Jean touching her new hairdo. Hyzinga hugged his mother, shook his father's hand, and then quietly urged the couple to make their exit. Have someone bring a ca- Thanks for being here, Pops. Now get the fuck out. This is a 54-year-old man at the time.
03:25:06
Speaker
Have someone bring a car around for mom, he snapped at his father. Harry shrunken by age, nodded obediently, and for the first time all morning, H. Wayne Hyzinga's famous eyes looked honest-to-goodness happy. That is the man. You know, you paint a hell of a picture of this guy there, Blakester.
03:25:35
Speaker
uh, this is a, or whoever the hell wrote this thing does anyway. Um, it's, uh, it's really interesting. We've talked about the similarities or at least alluded to the similarities between, um, men of the stature and other men that we know that, you know, could be called mobiles or, uh, certainly leaders of their industry. But it's,
03:26:04
Speaker
It's particularly interesting to me that this man, uh, ahead of almost every other one in this category, is he the ugliest man to ever be this successful? Hmm. That's a good question. I'm trying, I'm trying to dig and I'm thinking about it at least, you know, certainly in media, right? Like in the larger media landscape. I don't know that there's ever been.
03:26:34
Speaker
a more objectionably horrible looking human being that has made as much money as Wayne Huizinga. I mean, as much as him? Probably not. I don't know. I don't know. Larry Swint's pretty gross looking. Yeah, okay. That's fair. That's fair. I mean, do we take away because of the- Probably not that realm. Yeah, he's on the
03:27:01
Speaker
the very edge of society, right? Of, of, of reformed society. I mean, look, he's like, he's peddling in hardcore porn, not even like porn that people are comfortable with. Right. And, and, and at the same time, like also, do you have to take off like, you know, five or 10 of, of that penalty because like you have to give him a little bit of extra because he's, he's, he was disabled, right? No, you get it disabled because he got shot, not like he was
03:27:30
Speaker
had an issue. Yeah. He, he was, I think the, the wheelchair and the deformity after the, the shooting led to a pretty significant downturn in his, his levels of attractiveness. I don't know what you're talking about. I don't see color Gabe. Okay. Good shit. Good shit.
Upcoming Rockies vs. Phillies Game
03:27:55
Speaker
Well,
03:27:58
Speaker
That's two episodes in to our deep dive into 1993 major league baseball, or at least national league expansion. Um, and it's two weeks that we've done an episode without, you know, a whole ball game. So how are we going to rectify that Blake? Well, we're going to go and watch, uh, baseball with 93,000 other people and
03:28:27
Speaker
And the very first game in Colorado at mile high stadium, actually, I believe it was 80,000, but, um, did give WrestleMania three a run for their money. It's the, the Rockies and the Phillies opening day. Opening day, everything for the Rockies, 1993 opening day, uh, Rockies Phillies, just over 80,000 people. The still to this day, the most attended major league baseball game of all time.
03:28:57
Speaker
And it's all going to happen right here on the whole ball game.