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Episode 31 - American League @ National League - July 12, 1994 - The 1994 MLB All Star Game
29 Plays4 months ago
Life is a lie, Gabe struggles with depression, Blake does nothing to help. We watch the 1994 All Star Game complete with commercials. Griffey, Boggs, Frank, Ozzie, The gang's all here. Come in and watch how disappointed you should be that we didn't get a full season in 1994 and nothing was ever the same.
Watch along with us : https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VP1aOx4qZXY
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Transcript
Introduction and Opening Banter
00:00:00
Speaker
Let me hear you good and loud. All right, Gary. A one, a two, a three. And now, to people that probably know you better than you know yourself. That's my whole ballgame all night long.
00:00:22
Speaker
know, I usually have these long, drawn-out openings to these shows and Shatch EPT to get Rick Russell in here to to say his piece and ah do all that fun shit. But today, instead, I'm just going to do this. going to do this first.
00:00:40
Speaker
to show what I'm drinking. It's cherry, Dr. Pepper, zero sugar. And the only thing I have left in my life that's worth a damn, weed gummies.
00:00:53
Speaker
So that's how we're starting the show today. but Weed gummies. Cherry Dr. Pepper Zero. And I assume Blake's got something to play on his phone because that's that's the look on his face.
00:01:10
Speaker
Come on, Creedence.
00:01:13
Speaker
Let's go, Creedence. Oh, hey, man. There he is. Say my name one more time and I'll show up and I'll eat your fucking face, dude. Greetings. There it is. Like Beetlejuice.
00:01:24
Speaker
You get it? Yeah. A little bit. Also, kind of like Biggie Smalls, you know, for South Park fans out there, man. Jesus Christ. You know, man, i you know, we could sit here and do this all day long and I could run my fat dick licker just a million miles an hour, dude. But you know how it is when you're in the trust tree, Gabe.
00:01:44
Speaker
How you doing, buddy? I hit every branch on the way down, Credence. Every single branch.
00:01:52
Speaker
ye it's ah it's been a... That's what happens when you can't be trusted, dude. Yeah, it's been an interesting couple of weeks around here. I'll tell you that much, but... How's your butthole, dude?
00:02:03
Speaker
How's your butthole doing, man? A little little rough. A little worse for wear, as it were.
Chicago Trip and its Aftermath
00:02:09
Speaker
i uh... You know, this in particular is for our pal Daveed Uh, I, uh, I went to Chicago this past weekend for, uh, Jay and Silent Bob's Chronic Con, uh, along with the, the, the good people at Pro Wrestling Tees. Actually, it was only me. I was the good people at Pro Wrestling Tees.
00:02:33
Speaker
Um, I thought Scott Goldman was there. Not, yeah, he was there for a little bit. Scotty, Scotty G helped out. Um, but, uh, uh, uh,
00:02:45
Speaker
it was We were about 20% of the attendees to to Jay and Silent Bob's Chronic Con. Didn't get well? No, no, not particularly well, but that's okay.
00:02:56
Speaker
And then ate a lot of Chicago food, too much Chicago food, and as a result um had explosive diarrhea in the sense that I...
00:03:11
Speaker
I strained hard enough on the toilet that my, one of my hemorrhoids burst open and it looked like a bloodbath. Well, it literally was a, literally was a bloodbath. It looks like it looked like a murder scene is what it looked like. So I'm happy that I was able to share that little howie, little howie, a little howie in there, uh, uh, share that little nugget of, uh,
00:03:37
Speaker
of my life with you all. Um, you know, you know, the smell when your wife, it's your wife's time of the month and she's in there and you got the blood smell and you got the shit smell mixed together. that's It's yeah, it's the, uh, it's, it's, soft it's very similar to the same smell.
00:03:55
Speaker
Interestingly enough. Well, um, I mean, I don't know. Is it that interesting? Cause it makes perfect sense. And it seems like something that just, this never needs to be discussed. Yeah, you don't say it out loud. I guess that's why I find it interesting.
00:04:08
Speaker
ah Yeah, that's the interesting part, isn't it?
1994 All-Star Game Deep Dive
00:04:11
Speaker
So the two of you that haven't turned off the podcast at this point or ah forwarded 30 seconds, thank you for sticking around.
00:04:19
Speaker
ah We've got the big one today, Daddy. ah big ah big Big kind of deouement two hour 1994 journey, uh, that we've been on for the last two years.
00:04:35
Speaker
Um, it's a correct. It's it's the 1994 all-star game from three rivers. it's the nineteen ninety four all-star game from three rivers It's finally time, isn't it?
00:04:47
Speaker
I think it is. I do think it's time. It's been time probably for the... What's it been? Like two months since we were on last? Talking about Charlie Kirk dying? It's only been a month. We did the Rhino game a month ago.
00:04:59
Speaker
okay. Well, I feel better about that then. You know, this is the one you whip out when you have borderline threats coming at you for not doing a show. You got that? felt the immediately. got it.
00:05:10
Speaker
and felt the pressure immediately i got it We got to keep the Patreon you know up at around 90 bucks a month so Gabe can drain it every three months or so. don't see a fucking dollar on it, but the Spreaker money is mine, so don't worry about it.
00:05:26
Speaker
Yeah. and i I stopped checking at that point. Look, man. Hey, man. Maybe she's taking a good time. Probably for the best. that you stopped chugging it. je yeah You know, it's fine. It's fine. night I don't practice. he like that Like I told him, I don't practice finances anymore. I'm not engaged in any of this. Good for you.
00:05:49
Speaker
Any of these worldly things you people are doing, I'm i'm done with them. This is my last worldly tie. and need you to understand this. um I'm already gone, but I'm here want...
00:06:03
Speaker
i want to fulfill the needs of three people out there who need us to desperately talk to them while they drive across country and take baths and in but bathroom sinks.
00:06:19
Speaker
looking at you, Pop Top, dude. I know what you're doing, brother. Quit taking showers and fucking people's office sinks, dude. Adam, Adam needs it.
00:06:30
Speaker
Andrew's out there jerking off in theaters fucking Departed style because we haven't done a show wanging his dong or talking about movies I don't even know exist. You know? So, I think... I think andrew Andrew sent me some borderline porn on Instagram today of some girl dressed up like a clown.
00:06:48
Speaker
Sure. Yeah. No, that's that's it's Wednesday. but got hard immediately. oh Yeah, well... i I did float the idea of a lady clown out there. I think that's what it was. I'll see if I can find it here. No, it's fine. I'm glad you got it. No, you need to see it. No, I don't.
00:07:04
Speaker
yeah but I got a vivid imagination, dude. But anyway, like I said, brother, um you know you could run your fat dick licker all night long, but you better just hit play.
00:07:19
Speaker
Is she Asian? I don't know.
00:07:23
Speaker
Oh, clown pussy.
00:07:28
Speaker
Oh, she's coming. Oh, it is all about coming. She's at the right place. Hey baby, did she say honky tonk? She sure did. i think I'm so glad you're here, Jim.
00:07:43
Speaker
Hey, baby, it's been a while. How you doing, baby? You're not looking well, baby. No, I haven't been dancing a lot lately, Jim. You need to come stay at Meemaw's house, baby?
00:07:54
Speaker
We'll get you good, feed you some home cooking. Maybe so. No, I don't think I need any more home cooking, I'll be honest. No, baby. That at-home gyro kit from Sam's Club did the job.
00:08:04
Speaker
Well, see, that's the problem, baby. you need some of that dad You need some mashed potatoes and gravy. You need maybe some catfish off of Cousin Roger's dead daddy's boat. I'd like to take part of it out every now and then and sake a new part of it. I'll just swim back. It's fine.
00:08:18
Speaker
It gets me kind of excited.
00:08:21
Speaker
That's good. That's good. Thank you. Hey, baby, did you see those? You see all those young Republicans and their nasty shit they were talking about? I did. I saw all that. ah the The vice president believes we shouldn't worry about what what what kids in their 20s have to say in their group chats. It's not really important.
00:08:38
Speaker
No, baby, they do say just say it's the fucking future of a political party, that's all. you know That's all. I did find it very progressive, though, that the the the kid from Kansas, you know, I did think it was kind of cool that they had a big fat lesbian person that was a delegate, you know. Name was William Hendricks, I believe.
00:08:55
Speaker
No, yeah, no, I think he was a trans trans man. Yeah, that's what it was. Yeah, that looks about right. I don't know. He was talking a lot of shit, though, and he was pretty fat.
00:09:06
Speaker
Mm-hmm. Yeah, I know what that's like. He can't dance. Yeah, it's tough. You ever seen a fat person dance? I've seen myself dance. There's video of me at my wedding trying to dance. and It's embarrassing.
00:09:20
Speaker
Well, you know what's embarrassing, baby? What's that? At Blake's wedding, he came out to Real American. Oof. He made the bridal party come out to Voodoo Child.
00:09:35
Speaker
Rest in peace, baby. kind of miss you.
00:09:42
Speaker
We found, here's the good news. Here's the good news. We found a ah ah live broadcast version of the 1994 All-Star Game on YouTube.
00:09:53
Speaker
The whole fucking thing, man. ah All of it. Commercials and all. All four hours, 27 minutes and four seconds of it. And guess what?
00:10:05
Speaker
Fuck it. We've been gone long enough. We're getting into it. um So if you got the link there from down below, I won't forget it this time. ah And we'll shut up and we'll we'll all ah press play together in three, two, one.
00:10:25
Speaker
Play. Hi, man. Yeah. It's the NBC television. Doesn't that put you where you want to be right there? There's it's the only place I want to be.
00:10:43
Speaker
You know, this might be a hot take. I like Bob Costas.
00:10:49
Speaker
I go back and forth on him. Look at that little fat boy. yeah No, dude, that was me, brother. i was I was 400 pounds and 12 years old, dude.
00:11:06
Speaker
It makes me happy to see the the the catcher's equipment we wore.
00:11:13
Speaker
With that little little dangler, that the orange ah the orange chest protector with the dangler. Yeah.
00:11:23
Speaker
Mike Piazza talking about being a fan. Talking about Ted Williams sucking him off. There's Kirby before he disgraced himself.
00:11:37
Speaker
Tell me how Kirby disgraced himself again. Well, kirby Kirby had some sex pest problems, remember? Yep, now I do. Yep. I thought it might have been some some violence issues, but was the sex pest. I think it might have been tied into that, actually. Ah, okay.
00:11:54
Speaker
But... Gross. I mean, Kirby kind of, ah like, I feel like his stuff came out pretty close to his death, so it didn't really get as much of a...
00:12:10
Speaker
But, you know, he lost the goddamn eye and then that shit and he dies. But I loved Kirby and it was very sad to hear that. What was not to like about Kirby Puckett? I mean, other than the sex pest shit. and so So is it safe to assume that Kirby was aware of his demeanor and how he came across and used that to get his foot in the door to come in in whatever way he wants?
00:12:38
Speaker
I mean, look, that's safe to say. i Safe to say is... yeah Yeah, of course it's safe to say it. I think it's just... Well, yeah, of course that's what he did. That's what you do.
00:12:52
Speaker
We're on the Baseball Network, baby. I fucking loved the... I thought the Baseball Network was the coolest thing because it it made sense to me. I understood what they were doing.
00:13:05
Speaker
Like... They would go, you know, like this is NBC, but usually you'd see this on ABC, yeah Baseball Night in America, and like, then the fucking strike fucked it all up.
00:13:17
Speaker
Like everything else. Look at that.
00:13:23
Speaker
It's a real shame they got rid of that ballpark. It's kind of like ah when what we saw at Bush, the new ones right across, and they got the fucking... Kind of outside, you can see where home plate was at Three Rivers. I stood there.
00:13:39
Speaker
Look at that All their glory.
00:13:45
Speaker
i was going to say, ah think Philadelphia gets an all-star game in 97 or 98 or something, but this might be the last one of the last all-star games in the cookie cutters.
00:14:01
Speaker
Right. yeah Yeah, well. My goodness, well. Didn't happen, Bob. 29 days. As my father so... ah
00:14:16
Speaker
Jesus Christ. Can't be high already. ah So eloquently stated so many times. You can hope in one hand and shit in the other and see which one weighs more.
00:14:29
Speaker
thought it's which one fills up first. Hmm. He was always a Waysmore guy. I like fills up first pretty good. Greg Gumbel here. Very problematic in a lot of ways.
00:14:41
Speaker
don't think that got enough attention, but rest in peace. The only place he's not problematic is The Voice. I think The Voice is just... Look at that. Martin Short on NBC. Martin Short is trying to revive his career for the second time, I think.
00:14:59
Speaker
Yes. They all love a good slushie.
00:15:04
Speaker
The Martin is Short Show, Thursdays this fall on NBC. they were hoping See, they were hoping the Seinfeld audience would stick around. Oh, yeah, sure yeah, yeah.
00:15:15
Speaker
Didn't happen. It was all about Thursdays. The Geo Prism ranked best in class for something or other, apparently.
00:15:28
Speaker
Remember the Geo? I remember the GEO. I do. My buddy Tino, a.k.a. Jorge Chano Blanco, had a GEO storm in high school. Nice. We used to allegedly drunk drive that thing all over the country roads. Allegedly, yeah.
00:15:45
Speaker
look little commercial for Sunoco here. little gas station commercial. You think high school kids are still going out and partying in fields and driving home? Absolutely, they are. Yeah? Yeah.
00:15:57
Speaker
Hell no, man. Yeah, nah, look, man. Some things will never change. Have you seen them? They're just... Look, around here? Absolutely. But the the difference is that now with these parties, they're not they're not making out and fucking. They're creating content.
00:16:15
Speaker
What if they're doing fucking content and just sharing it their fucking school? You could have made... Man. Jesus Christ. if you' Back in high school, if you could have somehow finagled a porn ring...
00:16:27
Speaker
ah amongst the the seniors or whatever, as an entrepreneurial, a Mike DeMone type, if you will. i Very well done. Not that that's anything I would have been involved in, but... No, of course not.
00:16:41
Speaker
You could have made some money. Oh my God, look at this.
00:16:48
Speaker
Cora's finger, me. Let me tell you, me. Snip it. He just snipped it. You want to talk about paradise by a dashboard light? All you got to do is turn on the dome light ahead up above you and get my pinky ring shining in the light.
00:17:07
Speaker
And then Cora will stick her pinky finger in my asshole. That's paradise. Hey, look at this. God damn. As a matter of fact, this interview has been on the whole ballgame before.
00:17:22
Speaker
Yes, it has.
00:17:25
Speaker
I remember this.
00:17:30
Speaker
Look at that beautiful. I had that hat. So did like five other people I knew. No, Greg. I'm going to go out and have fun. And after the game, I might go to Disney.
00:17:42
Speaker
I'm a Disney adult. Hey, Dad. I'm coming home.
00:17:48
Speaker
How old is Dad at this point? Like nine? Nine or ten. I'm not sure which. I don't check. As a robot, I don't check birth certificates anymore. Well, not yet.
00:18:01
Speaker
Wait until the Trump administration gets a hold of you. Oh, dear. Look at Big Frank. Showing the home run derby here. Mm-hmm. How do you like all the All-Stars' names on individual banners around the stadium? What that do for you?
00:18:21
Speaker
Physical signage.
00:18:24
Speaker
383 average, 795 slugging.
00:18:35
Speaker
These men were on pace for 60 plus 61 homers, which would have tied the record.
00:18:48
Speaker
Griffey wouldn't have made it. He ends up getting hurt, but actually Matt Williams is the one that should be here, but He didn't really fit the vibe. Of the Angels, yes. Giants.
00:19:01
Speaker
There you go. ah is he a Is he a coach for the Angels now, though? is I think he's a coach for the Giants, actually. Is he? Well, we saw him, remember? Oh, shit. Yep, remember. He's third base guy.
00:19:15
Speaker
Yep, yep, yep, yep. That's where I saw him recently in my brain, why it was Angels. I don't know. Maybe you're close to death and the angels are on your shoulder. God, I hope so.
00:19:26
Speaker
Like Tony Danzen, angels in the outfield? i didn't Yeah, I didn't really understand why you were you were so high on the idea of death for so long. And and I don't know what happened in the last two or three weeks, but I'll tell you what. I'm glad that's on me. I'm ready. i'm ready I'm ready. This is my lifetime achievement award here. Fuck me.
00:19:49
Speaker
I've brought another human being. It's not in the butt because, you know, ah now now that I produce my own internal lubricant blood, ah i'd I'd prefer to keep the penises out of my anal
Philosophical Musings on Life and Death
00:20:01
Speaker
passage.
00:20:01
Speaker
Sure, yeah. Well, it makes you feel good as a human being to know you've done brought another human being to the truth and the way and the light of the acceptance of death. So we're going to live well in the afterlife.
00:20:16
Speaker
much We'll be much further ahead of everyone else, my friend. least there's that. We got this Goodyear commercial playing now. Hurry. Look out.
00:20:27
Speaker
It's a boat of Venezuelan drug lords. Let's blow it up. The 1994 All-Star Game pregame show brought to you by Chevrolet Like a Rock Sharp.
00:20:38
Speaker
Their new view cam is in stores now. And we're to great Did you they blew another boat I did, yeah, off the coast of Venezuela. Is that right? You got to think this is eventually going to blow up in their face.
00:20:52
Speaker
Blake, um yeah, sure. Absolutely it is. Well, I it's illegal. yeah yeah Yeah, but, you know, as you know, ah he the he is the law or something, I guess.
00:21:12
Speaker
For now.
00:21:18
Speaker
but i just I'm just happy to be here, says Matt Williams. I don't know. He's like Felix for mean. Maybe yes, maybe no. I don't know.
00:21:30
Speaker
Take that hat off. I hit my 33rd home run last Saturday, and I don't know how to put a hat on appropriately. It's fine. He's bald as fuck under that. It's very problematic.
00:21:42
Speaker
Like, he's probably 30 years old here. just all this shit
00:21:50
Speaker
830, 830. to go out there and try to beat these guys. I guarantee you. Oh, you betcha. Okay. Bye-bye, Greg. We'll see I'm whiter than you are, but not by much.
00:22:02
Speaker
Not by much. Gumbel to Gumbel.
00:22:10
Speaker
Oh, good. Greg Gumbel talked to Paul Molitor earlier today.
00:22:21
Speaker
See, Paul Molitor is on the executive board of the MLB Players Association. Yep, yep. That's got to make you feel good.
00:22:30
Speaker
Of the guys out there that could be on the executive board? I'm trying to think he was the president this time.
00:22:42
Speaker
Glavin, was it? I remember seeing Glavin around a lot.
00:22:51
Speaker
Let's see.
00:22:58
Speaker
i think there's a good chance there will be a strike, unfortunately.
00:23:13
Speaker
You would have thought, like, why couldn't they just have extended their goddamn agreement through the end of the fucking season? The end of the season, yeah. Just do that. It's obviously worked fine for the first part of the fucking season.
00:23:26
Speaker
Just finish it. the and NBA and the NBA Players Union fighting each other as well.
00:23:49
Speaker
We're going to take a timeout here, and then when we come back, we're going to meet the players. This my favorite part of the All-Star game. Yeah, best part. Speaking the devil, there's Paul Molitor at bat.
00:24:03
Speaker
The fifth world champion, and Paul Molitor, by the way. there's There's Oral Hirshhizer and Bo Jackson and
00:24:14
Speaker
Apparently, mean they're going to give money to local chapters of the Special Olympics of the the winner of the Most Valuable Player Award. So, thanks, Chevy. No, it's just swell. So, at this Chronicon thing, as you can imagine, like wrestling fans, fans of Kevin Smith are kind of the worst of us.
00:24:38
Speaker
um This combination of... of but ah you You hit the nail on the head, by the way, when we were talking about it. You have this combination of like the the fat wrestling fan that wears like like yeah hockey jerseys, yeah things that don't actually exist, like not ironically.
00:24:58
Speaker
um and then ah And then combine that with... With like people that smoke weed in public. Sure.
00:25:09
Speaker
And people that think they're smarter than everyone else. like The combination of those three things, that's what you get at one of these shows. Yeah, yeah. And this guy kept coming around. And ah because we were the only wrestling sort of booth in the room,
00:25:26
Speaker
ah ah he kept he kept asking... Hey, hey, have they ever had a special professional wrestler? And I was like, what what do you what do you mean?
00:25:39
Speaker
He means, you know, special. like Okay, yeah. Down syndrome, like a special professional. I was like, well, you know, people who've pretended to be special, ah like they were wrestlers, right?
00:25:52
Speaker
And he said, no, no, I mean, like, really special. Like, really. See, this is a pitch. I'm pitching you on this now. We need do this. Oh, okay. That would be... There's a lot of problems with that.
00:26:06
Speaker
And kept like being ah walking around high and like every time he stopped, I'm telling you, special professional wrestler.
00:26:16
Speaker
Well, it doesn't work well when ah someone that isn't and has all their faculties about them does it. and It just it wouldn't work on many levels.
00:26:29
Speaker
Much like John Adams' face. Bob Baylor looks so happy to be there. Jesus Christ. You know how goddamn fucking hard it is for me to get across the border and then they bring me to this all-star shit?
00:26:45
Speaker
Galen Sisko. That's right. Galen Sisko, baby. Hey! There he is. is Gene Lamont.
00:26:55
Speaker
And he managing next year?
00:27:01
Speaker
Indians in those blue tops.
00:27:06
Speaker
Non-starters. Mike Mussina.
00:27:10
Speaker
You know, the White Sox and the Indians were like the only teams wearing the non-gray or white tops.
00:27:18
Speaker
I mean, I think the Mariners might have had the teal one by this time, but all that shit was just starting.
00:27:30
Speaker
It's Wilson Alvarez with his first selection.
00:27:35
Speaker
There's a lot of new uniforms in this time, too. They all are very, very good.
00:27:45
Speaker
There he Albert, don't call me Joey Bell. That's one that isn't good. Those tiger uniforms are shit. I hate the stripes on the shoulders.
00:27:56
Speaker
The hats, too, suck.
00:28:00
Speaker
David Tone.
00:28:05
Speaker
Got the Brewers in their green and blue. Ricky Bones.
00:28:13
Speaker
Chuck Knobloch before he gets up to throw a fucking baseball.
00:28:21
Speaker
Tall drink of water. Paul O'Neill. Two home runs in a single game. Thank you very much. Yeah, how it to hit two homers? Well, he didn't. He hit a you know yeah you a triple.
00:28:33
Speaker
Hey, who's that handsome guy? Why don't you tell me? Look at this prick. Fuck you. God, he's a dick.
00:28:46
Speaker
He could hit, though. You ever want to talk about Will Clark? I came up with a ah came up with a ah ah character thing for Will Clark. so So if we want Will Clark on the show, we he can be here now.
00:28:59
Speaker
Yeah, I always assumed he would eventually come in.
00:29:06
Speaker
but Just let me know if you have any questions for Will Clark. Just address Will. I get you. I understand. Cito Gaston.
00:29:16
Speaker
remember Tony Gwynn telling a story one time about Will harassing a teenage boy, bat boy, and ah calling him gay slurs in the locker room.
00:29:28
Speaker
Tony told him to shut the fuck
00:29:35
Speaker
There's the chicken man with problematic politics. You see you see ah see Mr. Keep stepping on the ah the internet, getting out of his MAGA, and then denying it?
00:29:53
Speaker
keeps Was that that real? I didn't think that was real. Dustin, yeah. Huh. Yeah. Because I don't know. Everything he's ever said doesn't seem to follow in that vein, but I don't know.
00:30:09
Speaker
I assumed he would say he was hacked. Is that he said? He was hacked? Yeah, he said he's a libertarian. He doesn't know what we're talking about.
00:30:18
Speaker
and Okay. Mm-hmm.
00:30:22
Speaker
What a dog shit argument. Joe Carter, he lands in the BMF category, no? yeah He's got too nice of a smile. No. Oh, okay. I don't put him there. No.
00:30:34
Speaker
You have to be menacing. Too nice of a smile. Okay. All right. That's fair. All right. So Albert Bell, certainly. Yes, very much so.
00:30:46
Speaker
You have to have some... I don't know. i i don't I see Joe Carter and fear is not the first thing that comes to me. Right. Right.
00:31:00
Speaker
Pudge. Check out that fucking earring. Jesus. Is this his first?
00:31:09
Speaker
No, he's probably there last year at least.
00:31:14
Speaker
Who's getting the start? ah Jesus Christ. Jimmy Key. oh I think I told the Jimmy Key story. Yes, you did. Yeah, you told it. yep But for the the benefit of those of us.
00:31:27
Speaker
That's supposed to how this thing works, huh? yeah ah I had a neighbor kid who was couple years older than me. But, you know, so he was, and it's also around like, he's 14 and I'm 12 or 13, 11 or something. So, you know, it's a pretty big jump in those years. And he could throw a ball harder than me. He's faster and stuff and all this. So anyway, he doesn't actually play in the baseball league, but He'd play at the park and he'd knock the shit out of the ball. and like I'm like, I don't know why he didn't play. and
00:32:03
Speaker
He tells me his son, gives some horse shit story. but Anyway, basically the kid just had a fucked up awful life and his mom was a fucking whore as I look back on it. and he just Anyway, he told me how you would when he'd stay with his dad, his dad was friends with Jimmy Key and Jimmy Key was teaching him how to pitch.
00:32:24
Speaker
And that That was in 1992. So it's a very like almost plausible lie because you know, not like Jimmy Key was Roger Clemens.
00:32:39
Speaker
But all bullshit.
Childhood Memories and Baseball Nostalgia
00:32:44
Speaker
Looking back on it, I remember going to his house now and the smell I was smelling was the shit and piss from his little sister's diaper. Oh, fuck. Yeah. God, that's rough, man.
00:32:55
Speaker
Jim Leland getting cheered heavily by the hometown crowd. He's a very emotional man, too. He's going to tear up. He's going to pissed, either one. Yeah, he's mad.
00:33:08
Speaker
Little of both, yep. Yeah, he didn't know what to do. he felt it He probably felt it coming, and then he got pissed about it. He gets angry when he feels emotional, like a woman.
00:33:19
Speaker
That's what he says. Yeah, Dusty Baker. Yep.
00:33:27
Speaker
Red McGriff. There's the crime dog.
00:33:37
Speaker
Randy Myers. Hey, did I ever tell you about the time I got high with Randy Myers? No, you didn't, here. I'm glad. i i got high once with Randy Myers. It was great.
00:33:49
Speaker
That's all. Tremendous. Hey, there's Alphonse. Oh, Alphonse. Oh, I love to see you in the way I see you now.
00:34:00
Speaker
Oh, Alphonse. The way I see you now. wow I love those Astros jerseys, man. Those are my favorite Astros jerseys ever. Really? Yeah. That's interesting.
00:34:13
Speaker
God, could Bagwell and Biggio look any more like just the most like white meat human beings? Just... just No.
00:34:26
Speaker
You would never know that they were professional athletes by looking at those two guys. You can say that about a lot of baseball players. Five.
00:34:37
Speaker
Five all-stars for the Astros. Astros are loaded, man. Here we go.
00:34:43
Speaker
Viva Les Expos. Marquise Grissom. Wilfredo Cordero. Moise Salud.
00:35:00
Speaker
There's five. Five? Five. Five for the Astros, five for the Expos. It's got to be a starter, right? Yep.
00:35:12
Speaker
Sure. Fucking neckbeard. That's a filly.
00:35:20
Speaker
Danny Jackson looks like he grew up on a ah fucking Memphis Wrestling.
00:35:29
Speaker
Carlos Garcia gets a semi-standing ovation here in Pittsburgh. In his only goddamn All-Star game ever. and He's only there for because of the one-team rule. The Pirates have been absolutely raped at this point.
00:35:44
Speaker
Fucking Rob Beck. When this All-Star game was planned, they were the team of the fucking early 90s, okay? They had Bonds and Bonilla and Drabeck. Now they got Carlos fucking Garcia.
00:36:01
Speaker
Lenny Dykstra wants to fuck Robin Quivers, I hope you understand. ah a fucker in your fucking produce cooler at fucking Checkers, you fucking prick.
00:36:14
Speaker
Feels good to bring back some of the original cast. Yeah, it it really does, doesn't it? i was listening to Howard on Howard 101 the other day, and there was an old clip of Lenny in the studio from a couple of years back, and what a mess.
00:36:29
Speaker
hey Greg Jeffriesen. and see these are one that took over He's the one that took over when Clark left, right? Or is there a bit of a gap there? yeah year That's like a three-year gap, isn't it? No, no, that's bigger than that. Jack left, and then they then it went to Bob.
00:36:49
Speaker
That's right, Horner. ah yeah How could I ever forget about Bob Horner? and Hey, there's Tony. yeahp Pedro Guerrero.
00:36:58
Speaker
Then they even had one year of Andres Galarraga in 92. Come on. how How are they booing Barry Bonds in Pittsburgh? He just left them the year before and free agency.
00:37:10
Speaker
And he failed. It was that fresh? Yeah. they the year but He left the year before. And he also choked in the goddamn playoffs every time. so He didn't exactly get it done. I'm sure if they would have won two titles, he'd probably get cheered.
00:37:27
Speaker
Well, maybe not, but...
00:37:32
Speaker
They cheer the hell out of Matt Williams. That's funny.
00:37:41
Speaker
Yeah, we had... There was one of my... DJ. One of my favorites.
00:37:48
Speaker
Well, it's like it's a week we've talked about this ad nauseum on the show. was a Brave. So if he's a if they're a Cub or a Brave, you're probably a fan of the team. You know? like Yeah.
00:38:01
Speaker
I liked the Braves because i got to watch them.
00:38:08
Speaker
Bless you. And again. Hey, the Wizard.
00:38:18
Speaker
I've never done anything wrong, Gabe.
00:38:25
Speaker
I remember, Oz.
00:38:31
Speaker
With his Wilson adjustable glove with little click thing on the wrist. Oh, yeah. Remember that? i Absolutely, I wanted one and my parents couldn't afford that shit.
00:38:45
Speaker
See, i only had catcher. Well, I didn't only. I had a regular glove. but I only used it in my catcher's minute. and
00:38:55
Speaker
Please rise. ah Here we go.
00:39:02
Speaker
He would do anything for love. And he would also sing the national anthem. No. We gotta do Canada the first. Farmer's daughter.
00:39:13
Speaker
Oh, cowboy junkies. here I'll do it for you guys in case you can't hear it. Oh, got a little feedback there. Okay. We good? Okay. Oh, Canada,
00:39:27
Speaker
my home and native land. Why are you speaking in another language, lady? Is that French? Is that what she's doing? What a dumb cunt.
00:39:40
Speaker
Lafayette. Lafayette. glowing hearts, we see thee rise. The true north, brave and free.
00:39:51
Speaker
It's Brave Lady. I think it's actually strong. I was wrong. I don't know. The only reason I know the song even a little bit is because of Robert Goulet. Oh, yeah, yeah. It's the only frame of reference I've got. WrestleMania 6?
00:40:07
Speaker
Yes, sir. Goulet.
00:40:14
Speaker
but funny how two Will Ferrell impressions have made their way that way onto the program. What was the first one? like it like a well hey Hey! Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah.
00:40:26
Speaker
I don't know. I don't like it when you talk bad about me.
00:40:36
Speaker
We stand on guard for thee. always thought it was we stand on God. Nope. I mean, I figured it out a couple years ago. but Sure, sure.
00:40:49
Speaker
um Did you see Matt Williams' head? Yes, I did. Yep. It's a problem. Here we go. Look at this fucking sack of shit. Meat, meat, meat, meat, meat.
00:41:01
Speaker
me What's he wearing? A hell of a vest. Paisley vest. He looks like he's working at a goddamn catering company. Yeah, he's carving the prime rib.
00:41:14
Speaker
At the end of the buffet. Loading the van up with fucking black boxes they are temperature controlled.
00:41:31
Speaker
Is that meatloaf for John Kruk?
00:41:37
Speaker
Not much difference. Yeah, that was the joke. Yeah, i got it. Thank you, Gene. Friend of the program, Gene Gieselman, popping in every now and then. Every once in a while. he's ah He's a rascal, that Gieselman.
00:41:56
Speaker
Anytime I'm watching a Cardinals game and they say Gene Gieselman, Wyatt goes crazy.
00:42:06
Speaker
Kid's a good egg.
00:42:13
Speaker
Over on Sabre, we've got an article about the game here, so I'll try to get through some of it here while meat is milking this national anthem. When baseball stars convened in Pittsburgh for the 1994 All-Star Game, emerging pennant races and milestone quests shared headlines with labor management discord.
00:42:33
Speaker
A strike shuttered the majors a month later, relegating the unfinished campaign to an igno and ignominious place in the game's history. But the National League's 8-7 win over the American League in 10 innings.
00:42:47
Speaker
Spoilers. at Three Rivers Stadium. Climaxing with Fred McGriff's game-tying home run and Tony Gwynn's game-winning dash home on Moises Alou's double left a bittersweet memento of a star-crossed season.
00:43:02
Speaker
And we've got fireworks here in Pittsburgh. Pandemonium. In March 1990, baseball ended a spring training lockout with a four-year labor agreement, which expired December 31, 1993.
00:43:16
Speaker
As 1994 proceeded without a new agreement and also without a full-fledged commissioner, the owners having forced out Faye Vincent in September of 92, The owners made a proposal centered on a salary cap and revenue sharing among the franchises, but the players were unreceptive.
00:43:33
Speaker
Stalemate continued on July 11th, the Eve of the All-Star game, when statements by Donald Fair, director of the Major League Baseball Players Association, and rick Richard Ravitch, the owner's negotiator, gave little hope of imminent or amicable resolution.
00:43:51
Speaker
What we got? Is this the debut of yeah ER? r Yeah. Yep.
00:44:02
Speaker
I used to watch that every week with my mom. Continuing the Thursday tradition this fall. How about that? How about it?
00:44:12
Speaker
An on-field buzz, however, defied the bargaining table gloom. Sluggers like Ken Griffey Jr. and Frank Thomas bombarded Three River Stadium in the home run derby. Griffey's derby best seven homers vied with Thomas' stadium record 519-foot blast for Biggest Splash.
00:44:30
Speaker
All-stars Griffey, Thomas, and Matt Williams stalked Roger Marris' then-record home run pace. Thomas and Gwyn's twin.383 batting averages spurred memories of Ted Williams'.406 mark in 1941.
00:44:43
Speaker
In the first season of a division realignment, three games or fewer separated first-place teams from runners-up in all but one division. A sellout crowd of 59,568 as of 2021, the largest ever for a baseball game in Pittsburgh, turned out Meatloaf sang the Star-Spangled Banner.
00:45:05
Speaker
Pirates great Willie Stargell made the ceremonial first pitch, and Greg Maddox, destined for his third NL Cy Young Award three years, took the mound as the NL hoped to snap a six-game All-Star losing streak.
00:45:20
Speaker
Look at this. Now I want a beer. Need a Coors Extra Gold? I've never had it, but I bet it's it sounds delicious. I've never been a huge fan of Coors.
00:45:31
Speaker
yeah Tastes kind of weird. Wade Boggs started the first inning AL attack by bouncing a one-out single to the left of second base. Griffey drove Maddox's next pitch to center, slicing away from Gwynn.
00:45:45
Speaker
Ball went to the wall. Boggs stopped at third, and Griffey had a double. Look at that mini-man. Thomas singled... Look that shit. yeah ah hell yeah This is like the first fucking minivans, dude.
00:45:58
Speaker
It's the Safari. You look like a Safari guy. I would absolutely buy a Safari. Hell yeah. and shit Your Delaware Valley GMC truck dealer.
00:46:12
Speaker
oh Hard copy. Fuck it, we'll do it live.
00:46:23
Speaker
This 94 All-Star Game logo is delightful, too.
00:46:31
Speaker
Oh, there you go. Increased capacity by 10K, Bob, as Gabe was just telling us. Look at this. Hey! Look at Yook's in the booth, baby. You're going to offset the fucking dipshitiness of Joe Morgan.
00:46:52
Speaker
needs to be needs need We need Buck in the in the booth. No, we don't.
00:47:01
Speaker
Joe's enough. like it's yeah I'd hate to be stuck anywhere with Joe Morgan.
00:47:35
Speaker
It's been a minute.
00:47:44
Speaker
The
00:47:50
Speaker
Six straight losses by the National League. Yep.
00:47:55
Speaker
You know, we're... Yeah, late 80s, early 90s, and you got the Oakland dynasty going on. you got the Blue Jays winning back-to-back.
00:48:14
Speaker
C.O. Gaston.
00:48:18
Speaker
i mean, this is still kind of at the time where, you know, you got a little bit different styles baseball in the AL and NL still. Well, yeah, I mean, they're playing There's no designated hitter here is what I'm saying. Yeah, yeah Because they're in an NL ballpark.
00:48:45
Speaker
Well, and, you know, yeah, back then too, you know, in the NL, you got the pitcher batting and the DH and the AL. But even like – I mean, looking at this, comparing the all-star teams, all the sluggers on the AL – like look at it I think there's seven Hall of Famers here.
00:49:01
Speaker
Alomar, Boggs, Griffey, Thomas, Carter, Puckett, Ripken, Pudge, Jimmy Key. Everybody except for Jimmy Key and Joe Carter is a Hall of Famer.
00:49:14
Speaker
That's crazy.
00:49:21
Speaker
Here we go. Ozzie's doing the flip. Oldest player in the game. He's probably 40 here. Look at that, man. Goddamn.
00:49:32
Speaker
Oldest ride, longest line. yeah know Right, Ozzy? When you've done nothing wrong, buddy, you can flip the highest.
00:49:43
Speaker
Look at that beautiful pitch on the outside. First just painted the outside corner. just
00:49:49
Speaker
You know, Wyatt asked me who the best pitcher ever was, and I told him the only thing I can do is judge off of what I've seen in my lifetime. And I told him that it was Maddox.
00:50:07
Speaker
Do you factor in longevity? Because if you factor in longevity, then I think you just have to always pick Nolan Ryan, don't you?
00:50:16
Speaker
I don't factor in longevity, but that's a different discussion Sure. sure no I don't know. no one's weird Nolan could be more dominant than anybody, but he could also suck, too.
00:50:38
Speaker
i think a pitcher has to be able to put the ball wherever he wants to put it time after time, and Maddox could definitely do that, and Nolan maybe not. Yeah, Bonds, Gwynn, Justice in the outfield, William Smith, Mariano Duncan, Greg Jeffries, Piazza are on the infield, and Maddox on the mound.
00:50:59
Speaker
Less than seven all-stars here. All-famers. That's what I meant. Sorry. guess they're more than seven all-stars. Yeah, four. Piazza, Maddox, Ozzie, and Gwynn.
00:51:16
Speaker
Bonds should be. Yeah.
00:51:22
Speaker
Hey! Maddox gets his leg out to try to kick it.
00:51:32
Speaker
Wade Boggs, single.
00:51:44
Speaker
I love that we're getting Euchre on commentary. Yeah, I forgot about that.
00:51:52
Speaker
This is probably the best all-star game ever to me.
00:51:57
Speaker
Pretty hard to compete with, I would imagine, like just based off the rosters. um i I remember watching it live. Look at those shoes. Oh, Griffey smokes one to the gap.
00:52:12
Speaker
Boggs is going to hold up at third.
00:52:18
Speaker
Runners at second and third. Yeah, it's really doing a lot of good for my claim of the greatest pitcher ever, but this is just an exhibition game. Correct. That's right.
00:52:32
Speaker
Although he didn't exactly always show up in the playoffs, so...
00:52:37
Speaker
I don't know. Maybe you throw Randy in there. he had a lot of He had a lot of backup in Atlanta to pick him up. You know what i mean? But they didn't... but they won they didn't They weren't a huge offensive powerhouse, though. i mean that No, I'm talking about other pitchers, right? So if one game they give up, got you gotta you got to hope that you beat two out of the three of them.
00:53:01
Speaker
You know what i mean? And that's a tall order. It always blew my mind that they just didn't have more postseason success. with I mean, because they even had fucking Steve Avery at the beginning. Mm-hmm.
00:53:17
Speaker
He was there for a couple of years with Maddox. They had four, all four of them, but they weren't going to make the playoffs this year. i mean, they might have made the wild.
00:53:27
Speaker
Yeah, this was to the first year of the wild card. They would have been wild card team, I think, but they were like six games behind the Expos when the season ended.
00:53:38
Speaker
I remember that from our ah that episode.
00:53:44
Speaker
oh Franklin. Franklin.
00:53:48
Speaker
Visions of a pillow fort dancing in his head.
00:53:56
Speaker
Pitcher and the catcher are both 31. I just noticed that. That's crazy. It's like 13. That's over 13. That's 1310.
00:54:11
Speaker
His on-base slugging is a whatever the fuck they call that now. Jesus. Jesus. It's a rocket. oh oh Tony's not a center fielder by trade, goddammit.
00:54:27
Speaker
You know when the turkey sandwich is coming at you from the center, it looks a little different than if it's coming at you from the right game. It's a whole different slice of meat.
00:54:39
Speaker
Costas actually just said the exact thing you did.
00:54:45
Speaker
I never had a problem with Bob. He was never big turkey fan, though, if I remember. I think he was ah he was a chicken breast provolone guy. Mm-hmm.
00:54:56
Speaker
A little fancy. Fancy little guy.
00:55:00
Speaker
You boys sure do like your white meats, huh?
00:55:05
Speaker
Why not corned beef or pastrami, Tony?
00:55:09
Speaker
Well, I don't want my hemorrhoids to explode all over the toilet, Gabe.
00:55:23
Speaker
I bet you've eaten all sorts stuff. Oh, did you see that snag? I sure did What a beauty. Cute little double play there. That's the other thing, too. I think he won, like, fucking 15 gold gloves or something.
00:55:35
Speaker
That's wild as shit to think about. Whoop.
00:55:42
Speaker
Caught Frank sleeping, too. Well, that's not hard to do. He didn't have any pillows out on the field. Yeah.
00:55:52
Speaker
Car with a serious attitude. Is this the attitude era? yeah An Achieva Sport Coupe. Oh. It's a Honda? and It's an Achieva.
00:56:04
Speaker
Hot V6. Oldsmobile. ah
00:56:14
Speaker
Demand better. Is Oldsmobile still around? Nope. How many defunct car companies from our youth are there? There's a lot. Oldsmobile, Pontiac, Plymouth.
00:56:26
Speaker
ah
00:56:28
Speaker
Chrysler went away temporarily and came right back. I think Buick is probably the next one out the door. How's this happening?
00:56:40
Speaker
the Mostly the this the the sort of amalgamation of companies into threes. You know, I mean, Chrysler was um Plymouth, Dodge, Jeep.
00:56:54
Speaker
All of them came together under the Chrysler banner, including Pontiac. I think Pontiac. Yeah, Pontiac was a ah a Chrysler deal.
00:57:04
Speaker
Yeah, I don't know. So it's just another late stage capitalistic hell. Yeah, no, correct. That's exactly it. That's it.
00:57:16
Speaker
Maybe we should pivot, you know? Because if you just... It's not going work for the ones who matter. Well, here's the thing, though.
00:57:28
Speaker
If you never pivot, you you you eventually just end up writing something to death. Like, you're going to be there when it implodes.
00:57:43
Speaker
So pivot before that and don't be there to have destruction come down upon you. Do you understand?
00:57:52
Speaker
Jim Kelly, by the way, fucked Missy Hyatt. Do you know that?
00:57:58
Speaker
No shit. Yep. She said he had a small dick or he came too fast. I can't remember which one. I mean, look. Maybe both. At the end of the day, he lost three Super Bowls in a row.
00:58:10
Speaker
He didn't lose his life to cancer, though.
00:58:14
Speaker
He didn't or he did? He didn't. I don't think he did. I think he fought it and won. yeah Oh, that's right. Yeah, yeah, I remember he was sick. He was on WCW a few times. Just in the crowd? In the crowd. Nitro.
00:58:28
Speaker
Ah, Jeffries with a rope.
00:58:32
Speaker
I like Jeffries.
00:58:36
Speaker
I remember playing the shit out of World Series Baseball 94 with the Cardinals and having him. Gilkey-Lankford, Jordan and Witten in the outfield.
00:58:49
Speaker
That was some good shit.
00:58:56
Speaker
They weren't going to make the playoffs that year, though. The fucking Astros and Reds were pretty good at the top of the Central.
00:59:11
Speaker
Jeffries is kind a precursor to the modern modern guy, like the Bryce Harper type, the fucking... The... The... Hit... Dad is the hit... Freddie freddy Freeman.
00:59:23
Speaker
Like the... I don't know what Freddie fucking does. But, like, the... Just the shit where, you know, like, he's essentially a little hitting a robot kind of thing. And, you know, his dad was his coach and... Fucking...
00:59:39
Speaker
just the scam that has become youth sports gurus. Ah, okay.
00:59:48
Speaker
Late stage capitalism. It's the same thing. yeah it is. I'm sorry. I've seen it everywhere. I see it all over the place now and it keeps coming back to that. These things just...
01:00:00
Speaker
we just just It really is is cancer. like ah you think about kit You just let it grow and grow and grow until it fucking dies and consumes you. it Yeah, but it meant metastasizes until it kills its host.
01:00:14
Speaker
That's what cancer does. yeah where' We're just going to let this go and do nothing and that's the philosophy and oh, oh so we're just going let the cancer kill us.
01:00:27
Speaker
It seems problematic. I'm not going to lie. and you know This is one of the reasons I don't engage in finance.
01:00:38
Speaker
Fuck. I don't have to think about this shit. Oh. Barry gets a hold of one.
01:00:47
Speaker
Oh. on the On the warning track. Kirby Puckett says, no. but i said, no, bitch. Get over here. I'm Kirby Puckett.
01:00:59
Speaker
That was my eye coming out.
01:01:05
Speaker
What'd you say, bitch?
01:01:09
Speaker
I can't do it. Fuck it. It's slapping my face. Yeah, that's what I was trying to make. Instead, I just hit myself in the mouth. I saw It was pretty good.
01:01:21
Speaker
Man, Barry was hoping he got that one out to shove it up their ass.
01:01:30
Speaker
Jimmy Key with another strike here. yeah
01:01:40
Speaker
Barry's hair is quickly receding. Whoa! Mm-hmm. and Frank says, none of that, thanks, and ends the inning on a little blooper.
01:01:54
Speaker
One-to-one at the end of one. What do we got here? Anheuser-Busch soccer commercial. Oh yeah, we got the World is 94, baby, remember? Oh, World Cup, yeah, of course.
01:02:06
Speaker
Soccer's taking over, we're playing FIFA for the first time. I have no sound on mine, do you have sound on yours? No, no sound on mine either. You can almost say that guy's nuts.
01:02:18
Speaker
It was all on purpose. Oh yeah, sure. FIFA wants us to think about testicles as much as ah as possible. Those Brazilians are sexed up. They're charged with fucking... How many in a Brazilian?
01:02:35
Speaker
Jesus Christ.
01:02:41
Speaker
There we go. Sounds back. Thank God.
01:02:49
Speaker
The american silence is is deafening when there's no sound behind our ears.
01:03:00
Speaker
See, that was a joke that I've sold on the program before. That was the punchline to it. It's how many in a Brazilian? You're very proud of that one, aren't you?
01:03:13
Speaker
It's one favorite jokes. I can see, can... You can fucking barely contain yourself from it. Probably because you're high. That might have something to do with it, you dipshit.
01:03:27
Speaker
i didn't actually take it. You did? say What the fuck is wrong with you? No, I did. I did take it. I just didn't want to admit it. Oh, Jesus.
01:03:39
Speaker
Well, you blew your cover, you dipshit.
01:03:44
Speaker
I can tell you took looking at me.
01:03:49
Speaker
Looking at what? Your fucking face, you idiot. What else?
01:03:56
Speaker
Hey, it's Martin Short. You look slightly scared.
01:04:05
Speaker
Oh, God.
01:04:10
Speaker
have have really mixed feelings about Martin, you you know? I'm conflicted with him. I like Jiminy Glick. Yeah, yeah.
01:04:21
Speaker
It's a character that that is, you know, very similar to Credence. He really is, isn't he? Yep.
01:04:30
Speaker
Hi, man. behind you lo We just both gentlemen, man. That's all.
01:04:37
Speaker
Lady.
Mixed Feelings about Martin Short
01:04:44
Speaker
Yeah, may we couple of ladykillers man. killers, man. mr Who's the senator from... ah
01:04:56
Speaker
What's his name? ah Chris Christie? No, the Republican senator from the South. They call him Lady J or something. Oh, Lindsey Graham. Lady Yeah.
01:05:13
Speaker
Because he's fucking Ben. King Crenes, sir. Very tight. Oh, I'm sure they've they've teamed up to power their deviants together to so Credence can fuck women and Lady G can get the men and they can help each other with that.
01:05:33
Speaker
very ah he is a Lady G built a tree stand in the Trust Tree. he He's going nowhere. Hey, man, me and Lady G, we tight, you know.
01:05:46
Speaker
We got each other's back and front.
01:05:53
Speaker
Not literally, though, right, Credence? You're talking figuratively. I'm just talking, man.
01:06:02
Speaker
Running your old cock gobbler again. I'm just sitting here just just blowing my old dick licker.
01:06:16
Speaker
You know how I get when I get to firing up the old dick smoker.
01:06:25
Speaker
I just let shit fly out of my cum guzzler, man.
01:06:31
Speaker
Me, Lizza! Me, Lizza!
01:06:38
Speaker
Come look at this. It's Kyle Rifkin, baby. He's Iron Man. Sean.
01:06:47
Speaker
Like Sean in Anaheim, baby.
01:06:56
Speaker
Oh, boy. Yeah, we got to do it this way every time. Makes for a much more entertaining program. Sure, yeah. Yeah. I feel it. Yeah.
01:07:07
Speaker
I always loved how nasty Kyle Ripken's batting helmets were. Yeah, he always... It's full pine tar and shit. I love it.
01:07:17
Speaker
His stance changed a lot as time went on. Very interesting. Most guys don't do that.
01:07:28
Speaker
I know you agree. Yeah, I'm... You have no idea, I know. No, I have no idea. That's the joke. Thank you. Euchre was saying something about... Well, I forget what he... Oh, ah being a being a former player.
01:07:45
Speaker
trying to make the the color commentary sort of transition over to Bob again. and I'm thinking to myself, yeah, you you you played for a while, but is that why you're around or are you around because you're entertaining?
01:07:59
Speaker
Like, I got ah um don't know that it matters if you were a player. Well, I mean, sort of. Like, it, you know, if he would if he didn't play ball, then You know, it could just be anybody there that's a... Yeah, I guess that's a good point. Tell me this.
01:08:19
Speaker
um I don't know how he became an actor, though. like Yeah, I don't either. How did Kel Ripken Jr.'s batting stance change? Was he ah ah bent at the knees more often, and then he straightened it out?
01:08:32
Speaker
i He just would do it. Because he was pretty straight up here, right? He didn't have a lot of bend in his knees. And I thought, well, maybe as he got older, he needed to not be bending his knees as much. That that that was what popped into my head. I don't know the specifics of it. I just know that as you watch his career, um many points in the career, you see him with... Different stances. Yeah, I mean, i did not like...
01:09:01
Speaker
It's like he's fucking batting stance guy after going through a routine. But, like, yeah you know, he'll have his fucking hands back, his hands here, his feet closed, they're more open. Or, like, it's just more like he, lot of guys, especially fucking guys this level, don't mess with their fucking stance.
01:09:20
Speaker
And he did a lot.
01:09:30
Speaker
Pudge really did get very pudgy as he got older, didn't he? Yeah, you know, steroids. Mm-hmm. I mean, he's on the juice here. Look at those thighs. But then, yeah, you know, I think there was like the the inflation. And then when the deflation should have started, he didn't diet appropriately. And so it just all turned to goo.
01:09:59
Speaker
He's down there doing roids with Palmeiro and Conseco.
01:10:05
Speaker
Tino Martinez? No, Tino's in Seattle. don't think Tino did roids. Oh, no. Who was I thinking of then in Texas?
01:10:16
Speaker
Tito Santana. Arriba.
01:10:24
Speaker
Oof.
01:10:28
Speaker
yeah they Sorry, folks, we're watching we're mesmerized by this commercial of just the Nike commercial for junior for Ken Griffey Jr. It's just a compilation of home runs, and it's just it's mesmerizing. yeah they're They're selling me the Griffys.
01:10:46
Speaker
That's what they're doing. i would be buying them. Holy cow! Yeah, they threw Harry in there, huh? It's interesting.
01:11:00
Speaker
Oh, hey, man, look, it's little babies on the TV, man. Ain't that cute?
01:11:08
Speaker
One of them was from Ackworth, Georgia, which is close to Chattahoochee, as I recall. that's where That's where Big Papa Pump's Choney's was at, man.
01:11:18
Speaker
Ackworth? Yeah, you're right. I tell you, hi man, I put so much, I ain't never put so many many waffles from a buffet in my fucking cock gobbler that I did down in Ackworth, baby.
01:11:31
Speaker
I must have went through two, three pans, dude.
01:11:37
Speaker
The Shoney's that Scott owned, was it a just a buffet or was it a pizza and buffet? I think he was even selling fucking booze at his.
01:11:50
Speaker
Like, he had some weird deal going on. Hey, look, it's Michael.
01:11:58
Speaker
Baseball. wearing his Wearing his unlicensed White Sox jersey because there's no logos on it. Yep.
01:12:07
Speaker
Now I'm playing baseball. It's Gatorade commercial.
01:12:15
Speaker
Just got the number 45 where the logo should be.
01:12:20
Speaker
He still knows where the ball goes. And sooner or later, he's going to get it there. He hopes. they're making fun of the fact that he's not very good.
01:12:33
Speaker
Look at that. Seeing the way that he played when he was playing. I imagine if he had just decided he wanted to play baseball instead of basketball, that we might be talking about him as the greatest baseball player of all time. Instead, it's just a mentality. I think, uh, the man like has some court had, had, had,
01:12:56
Speaker
unleashed some sort of superhuman element within his brain that very few people on the planet have ever managed to unlock and he would just happen to be lucky enough to do so there's not really much more an explanation for the kind of success that he had definitely uh in tune with anton and the black masses and the turnips you don't get that power without that wondered what that billboard was about when i was in chicago now i understand Yeah, i' you know, greatest, maybe we not. I don't know, and you know, maybe.
01:13:32
Speaker
um I don't think you're wrong there. if he Look at that creepy guy. Jesus fuck. What's he doing? He looks like mafia.
01:13:44
Speaker
La mafia. But, yeah, I think if ah Michael wanted to, he could have done done it Jimmy Key sat Matt Williams' ass straight down.
01:14:01
Speaker
Down with that big breaking ball.
01:14:09
Speaker
Thanks, Joe. Yeah, Joey letting you know exactly why you... How do you know what he was fooled by, you dumb fuck? You don't know. think you know.
01:14:20
Speaker
Look at that bald asshole, man. He looks like my goddamn elementary school principal. Mr. Greenlee. Ron Greenlee. Oh, Ron. Fuckers spanked me one time.
01:14:32
Speaker
Seriously? You said preschool? Elementary. Oh, okay.
01:14:39
Speaker
I got spanked like three or four times in elementary school. You got a smart fucking mouth. You should have saw the flip-off dance I did to the librarian behind her back.
01:14:50
Speaker
Goddamn class fucking narked on me.
01:14:55
Speaker
Cricks. Somebody like offered it up. Like what a fucking bitch. You remember who it was? No, I don't. It's like fifth grade, I think.
01:15:08
Speaker
I didn't get in trouble though, because my mother knew who the lady was and she thought she was a cunt. I remember you telling me about the librarian. Yeah. Armitha Taylor.
01:15:20
Speaker
Armitha.
01:15:22
Speaker
White lady? Huh? White lady? Oh, yeah, yeah. Yeah. Just Armitha is a very... Yeah. My mom said she used to go to church with them back in, like, the 60s or something, and she hated her then. I trust her people intuition. I think Mama Ballgame was probably right about Armitha.
01:15:49
Speaker
yeah she Yeah, she might not always get the details accurate, but the she's got the overall picture yeah ah pretty... Pretty good.
01:16:00
Speaker
think that's all you can ask of an 80-something-year-old woman.
01:16:06
Speaker
Call out nonsense where you think nonsense exists. That's all we can ever that's all any of us can do. That's very poignant. Thank you.
01:16:18
Speaker
Ken Hill warming up in the pen, former Cardinal. Mariano Duncan in now. Six homers on the year. 43 RBI. Actually, former Cardinal and future Cardinal. How about that?
01:16:31
Speaker
How about it? He'll be going to St. Louis as part of the fire sale next year. and Why isn't he on the walk of fame in St. Louis? Come on. Got to have people for next year, I guess.
01:16:43
Speaker
ah He didn't play there that long. Oh, okay.
01:16:47
Speaker
There we go. Fair ball. Bogsy. Look at Big Frank. With that stretch. Yep. Man is a friggin' unit.
01:17:01
Speaker
No, I'm the unit, you dumb shit. You're just high as fuck. That's a good point. I don't see why i have anything to argue about. I've done the marijuana.
01:17:17
Speaker
Who's the greatest threat to America? Oh, man, what is this? Other nations, you think? Some say.
01:17:29
Speaker
Oh. The Patriot.
01:17:34
Speaker
I was going to say Clear and Present Danger, but I haven't seen either movie. Oh, no, no. You're right.
01:17:43
Speaker
The Patriots of Mel Gibson. Yeah, was going to say Patriots got Mel Gibson, I think. Jesus Christ, man. What an idiot. It's about the Revolutionary War. Patriot Games. see? There it
01:17:59
Speaker
see yeah you See, you don't speak truth to power, Harrison. Come on, man.
01:18:08
Speaker
Oh, you were right. The first time.
01:18:13
Speaker
Well, no, they said Patriot Games in the thing. I think that might have been some other... i i feel I feel a lot better. Maybe that was a sequel. You think that was a sequel to Clearing Present Danger?
01:18:25
Speaker
I think they were saying from the author of this, author of that. Maybe it was a book. or I don't fucking know. I'll just close up my cock tickler. It's fine. Hey, man, you need to you need to tighten that thing up, dude. like you just You're just running your fucking dick-smoking mouth all goddamn too long, dude.
01:18:42
Speaker
Oh, it's Keith. Oh, no.
01:18:50
Speaker
It's dying kid. My dad's name is Keith. my dad's dead My dad's dead too.
01:18:59
Speaker
Here he is. You never know how long they have. Here's my dad at Dog and Suds when he was years old.
01:19:18
Speaker
Oh, the Hulkster. The Hulkster coming to Jay Leno this week. got to come and promote his head down to Ted Turner, dude. Yes, I see. You showed me this photo.
01:19:35
Speaker
He was a good man. Yes. That's very celebrated in these parts. ah
01:19:50
Speaker
We must play.
01:19:54
Speaker
participate in the lives of American youth. Yeah, you don't see this too much. yall You don't see this at all anymore. Pitcher out there for fucking three innings in the All-Star game.
01:20:10
Speaker
I found it really interesting last week.
01:20:14
Speaker
I saw there was some pitcher in a playoff game that was pitching a no-hitter through seven. And they took him out of the game. Sure, yeah. No, you have to do that.
01:20:28
Speaker
I have not watched any playoff baseball this year.
01:20:33
Speaker
I can't imagine. Yeah, I can't. There's nothing. I can't really see me watching any of it. Maybe if the boy wants to.
01:20:49
Speaker
Whoa. What a play by Mariano. I can't believe he got him. I didn't think he was going to get him. Hang with him.
01:21:05
Speaker
Hey, man. Not so good at third, but good at second. I could use a set of hands and like that in a trust tree, man. Help me keep ah keep slippery things in tight.
01:21:16
Speaker
You know, man? know what I'm saying?
01:21:22
Speaker
don't know, man. Maybe... maybe Maybe I've been running my cock home a little too much. benny Is Benny Johnson in the trust tree, or is his little snake mouth too slippery?
01:21:34
Speaker
I can't. I hate Benny fucking Johnson. This guy's just the most disingenuous piece of shit ever. He and Matt Van Swole create...
01:21:47
Speaker
ah ah how ah cuck porn on OnlyFans together. Giant pussy on a whole other level. i don I just... I had a hard time believing these are real people, honestly, but I think they are. Benny and Charlie and Maddie.
01:22:09
Speaker
It's just like...
01:22:12
Speaker
How big of a piece of shit do you have to be to do what they're doing? You know, they don't believe this shit. No. it And if they do... They're smart enough, they fucking know it's bullshit.
01:22:26
Speaker
Correct, yeah. If they really do, then they're they're just... They're not smart enough to live. And they they failed into something by accident. But this isn't an accident.
01:22:37
Speaker
This is clear manipulation of people with brains that aren't as large as other people's. I... I've been thinking about this and...
01:22:51
Speaker
it's haunting because I didn't really ever think of it in these terms, but you know, the, the George Carlin quote about how, think of how stupid the average person is and then think half the people are dumber than them. That's a, that's, that's a lot.
01:23:14
Speaker
Yep.
01:23:17
Speaker
Like, I mean, look, but it's also, look, it's also the secret to social engineering. It's the secret to, to, to being a couple of steps ahead is keeping that very important statistic in mind that even the normals are, are only kind of stupid.
01:23:41
Speaker
You know what mean? And so knowing that and taking advantage, here it is. It is. It's the Voodoo Lounge. The Voodoo Lounge is open, baby, finally.
01:23:54
Speaker
know he's only riding road, but like his love and I'm also. Oh, baby, the Voodoo Lounge is presented by Budweiser.
01:24:07
Speaker
Only one beer. Budweiser. King. of beers.
01:24:39
Speaker
What a shitty looking movie. It could happen to you Great. I love it. It's a great movie. but Do you know why? ah don't.
01:24:51
Speaker
Guy wins the lottery. Really? He wins $4 million dollars and he he makes good on his offer to give the waitress half because he didn't have money for a tip the day before.
01:25:05
Speaker
What a piece of shit concept. Oh, it was great. Fucking great. Nicolas Cage, great. The Woman, great. Rosie Perez, fucking great.
01:25:17
Speaker
Awesome. Did you see the commercial with Mike Ditka? No, I didn't. sure He's going to the broadcast table in the pregame for NBC because he's destroyed his fucking coaching legacy. Oh, okay. Yeah, no. By now, he...
01:25:33
Speaker
Left Chicago and went to New Orleans, right? yeah he hadn't been to New Orleans yet because he's still got a pull off that fucking bullshit trade.
01:25:46
Speaker
Cal's envious of Ozzy's dick size, he says. That's correct, Blake.
01:25:54
Speaker
But is that your fault, Ozzy?
01:25:57
Speaker
Nothing is. Thank you, Gabe. and I just wanted to get that cleared up for you and notice I have no ear flaps is that does that have any sort of significance uh in and around the the bitch quotient within you the uh the lack of ear flaps uh would indicate that I am no bitch got it got it thank you thank you
01:26:27
Speaker
so my algorithm is really fucking weird lately oh you don't say you said thank you said thank you and it reminded me I get these videos now of this woman who's like clearly from the Midwest right just very very sort of girl next door like a little bit do you remember are your eyes open because they look like your eyes are just fucking closed and but you're talking like fuck are you okay
01:27:02
Speaker
I'm okay. All right. Do you remember to salute your shorts? Yeah, of course. Do you remember the hippie girl? Uh, yes. Like, uh, zippy or pepper or whatever her name is, right? I know. Yeah. Yeah.
01:27:16
Speaker
Well, it kind of looks like her. Sure. Tippi, tippi. I think it's tippi. Tippi, tippi canoe. Tippi canoe and Tyler too. We're back. Jesus. Uh, we're back ah Yes, we are the guys. These little fucking twins.
01:27:32
Speaker
So... So... This is all part of Blake's twisted fantasies. So anyway... hey, man.
01:27:44
Speaker
You guys can't even get words out of your...
01:27:51
Speaker
ah oh hey man you guys can't even you can't even get words out of here Out of your fucking penis pipes.
01:28:00
Speaker
That's a good new one. like that. Penis pipe. ah Schlong sucker. There you go. Anyway, so she's holding these two things in her hands, right? Sure, yeah.
01:28:14
Speaker
And they they they're they're therere they're long and skinny, and then they have a ah piece that goes out like 90 degrees, so they're like L-shaped, right? Yeah. And so she's asking questions at the camera, like as if she's talking to some spiritual something or other. Right.
01:28:33
Speaker
Yeah. And if these, if these things go in towards each other, the answer is yes. And if they go out away from each other, the answer is no. But see, the trick is you don't see her doing anything with her hands to make them do anything. So it's being moved by this extra worldly force.
01:28:54
Speaker
Sure. Sure. And after every question is answered, she finishes with, thank you. So like she'll say, is, is God an energy that lives within all of us?
01:29:07
Speaker
And they go and they touch each other. And she says, yes, thank you. And then they go back to normal. And so you said, thank you. And that's what it reminded me of. Cause my algorithms weird.
01:29:20
Speaker
ah That is a, Great story, and I absolutely did not stop listening like 45 seconds ago. Yes,
Promoting Patreon and Content Plans
01:29:30
Speaker
thank have you. Now, folks, if you want more of this, the whole ballgame, we're over on patreon.com slash the whole ballgame. I know this is... ah You don't get to see much of us on the free feed anymore, but there's plenty of nonsense over there if you'd like more of us, because we're probably not going to do this more than once a month for free.
01:29:51
Speaker
So... let me let me Let me ask. Yes. Thank you.
01:29:58
Speaker
Man, you guys just... I don't know, man. They bringing me in like I'm Sid. When shit goes downhill, here I am. I'm coming in on top of territory. I'm going to buy you guys out. I'm going to give Gabe a stack of lottery tickets, man. going to call this thing good.
01:30:17
Speaker
don't know. pee now. part of the second family I'm gonna put you guys to work in the office dad stay away from the can I get it can I get one of those caricatures done of my big fat face
01:30:39
Speaker
me lizard draw one of them pictures of gizl you know what's what's really interesting um is you know We've talked about before that you and I were both at star StarCast 2 in Las Vegas. God damn, I've got to stop the meatless. I forgot my kids to sleep. All right, next door.
01:31:04
Speaker
Anyway. Oh, Tony with the RBI double here.
01:31:12
Speaker
Oh, safe. Wow. What a play. Yeah, it's great.
01:31:19
Speaker
I remember this. You gotta watch this his slide. it's a It's a work of art. He was a true student of the game. I'll give that to Greg. He was very fundamentally sound in all ways.
01:31:34
Speaker
He's a complete neurotic asshole, though, I think.
01:31:39
Speaker
Part of the problem with today's game, maybe the biggest part of the problem, so...
Evolution of Sports and Athlete Mindset
01:31:45
Speaker
You see this happen. look at this and That's unbelievable. He picked his foot up.
01:31:49
Speaker
yep Unreal. Puts it down.
01:31:54
Speaker
they They had a camera on... Wow.
01:32:05
Speaker
They had a camera on... There it is. Kirby Puckett. crab like Crab walks his way to the back of the plate. He had a camera on Kirby Puckett after this happened, watching the replay, looking incredibly disappointed in himself and upset that he didn't get the ball closer or better or whatever, right?
01:32:27
Speaker
Today, it would have been, don't know, he was a fucking left fielder. O'Neal Cruz out there laughing and clapping about the other team scoring a point because it's an exhibition game.
01:32:41
Speaker
but These men these men and we've seen they're Jesus. Bond's just trying to hit a goddamn homer shove it up these people's ass. He's swinging from the heels.
01:32:55
Speaker
But, um, yeah, we've we've seen a level of ah ferocity here that is just gone forever now.
01:33:08
Speaker
i mean, until we have to start, like, playing games for our lives or something, but, you know, For now. They just... Yeah. but like They're playing like it's a fucking playoff game.
01:33:25
Speaker
They have some pride.
01:33:32
Speaker
And that's gone. like We've done it to ourselves because... And I think it's more a byproduct of just this efficiency culture.
01:33:44
Speaker
whatever you want to call it, like you, you know, like it's okay to not give maximum effort all the time.
01:33:58
Speaker
Cause try to be steady and efficient and like, you know, not get too high and I get too low. That's the same thing we do to life. We try to neuter people and tell them, you know, be this, that, and we,
01:34:11
Speaker
All we're really doing is saying, you know, don't cause problems for us. That's what we want. Correct. Yep. Be fucking neutral. Don't cause problems for me. Don't like. Nah, man, this is it. You ride the lightning bolt.
01:34:27
Speaker
And that's a, it's an interesting thought too. Cause it's just like, I think about today, like.
01:34:37
Speaker
Yeah, it's all about how much you can get done exerting as little energy as possible. and Yeah, we've called it efficiency. It's bullshit.
01:34:54
Speaker
There's a time and place for it. Yes, that's that's exactly where I should was would have gone more quickly if I wasn't high. Yeah, we get there eventually together. Yeah, so... But then...
01:35:05
Speaker
but then you that's what you lose. That's what you lose. You don't have that mentality anymore. like therere The reason that LeBron James is not as good as Michael Jordan is because of that thought process.
01:35:21
Speaker
Exactly. Yeah, that's a very apt point. Yeah. You know, and he's just going to play forever to try to, like, Get all the records that are black and white, not the the intangible things that you can you can only explain to younger generations by showing them the video in context.
01:35:46
Speaker
Yeah, it's like, you know, if a guy can do something in 13 years it takes you 20 to do, he's better than you. And that's the end of the discussion.
01:35:57
Speaker
Like, I think... You know, things just go so goddamn long that eventually up becomes down and left is right. And we just got a circle. Time is a flat circle.
01:36:12
Speaker
National League up four to one Martin Short is getting a push. you He really is. We've got Griffey, Thomas, and Joe Carter up next for the American League.
01:36:25
Speaker
You know what? I'm going to tell you this something right now, Gabe. I think we do better character work than Martin Short. Because these fucking guys suck. Yeah, not so great. Hot dog vendor, Nelson, whatever.
01:36:38
Speaker
Butt fucking. I don't think so. I'm going to let the dog out of that. Yeah, I'm going let the dogs out. Oof.
Youth Sports Dynamics and Changes Over Time
01:36:43
Speaker
He almost fell over as he stood up, by the way.
01:36:48
Speaker
He's got his Bret Hart t-shirt on.
01:36:53
Speaker
Bill Goldberg. Up up. Up up. up.
01:37:00
Speaker
$2.39 a month. $2.39 a month in 1994 money seems like a lot. I did not almost fall over. you stumbled a bit. Yeah, i almost fell down.
01:37:13
Speaker
If I had fallen down, folks, let me explain to you the kind of noise that would reverberate through this house. Because it would shake the foundation of the building that I'm in.
01:37:24
Speaker
To the point that I would probably wake my my wife and child in the room sleeping. And that's a difficult thing to do, especially for Bob. So, yeah, it would have shaken. it would have been bad. i probably would have knocked shit off the walls if I had fallen down.
01:37:41
Speaker
There's nothing funnier than watching a fat man fall down, though.
01:37:54
Speaker
You alright over there, Gunnar? What are you doing? Oh, I just got caught reading something that fucking was... I just mind wandering and wondering what possible good outcomes could anybody hope would come from this and why would you do this as a... some grandmother, I guess, but... Some post to the fucking like middle school football team, which is like the same...
01:38:24
Speaker
probably They probably play like the same teams my kid plays and stuff. but Basically, she's bitching because her grandson doesn't get to play. and She's made a post to the coaches to do better. and Blah, blah, blah. Whatever. and It's like i just like, what lady do you really think this is the best way to do this?
01:38:50
Speaker
ah And secondly, you're the grandmother. You shouldn't be doing anything. um Like, i understand I understand being upset, but like, what are we do what are we using the internet for? What are we doing here?
01:39:05
Speaker
Yeah, like, if you want to say something, say it to the fucking coach. and
01:39:14
Speaker
i don't know. Like, they made it very clear this year. you know like ours, i mean, ours did anyway. like the beginning, it's like, you know, ah think there's like a fucking eight play minimum or something like that, but it's like, you know, the the kids that are best are going to play. Like, this is where, you know, they start earning their playing time and that's the it is. Like, it's how fucking works, you know?
01:39:47
Speaker
can't do the
01:39:51
Speaker
just can't do that kitty kitty shit forever. Like at some point has to change.
01:40:00
Speaker
Well, another, that's I mean. It's another shot at, at the, the fucking.
01:40:07
Speaker
Well, go ahead. I go to say, the problem is, is it's the same fucking deal, but it's, it's become about not the kids. Like, It's about the fucking butt hurt pairing. It's about the... I guess what I meant was just it's it's it's what's leading to the culture of these traveling teams. and Yeah. and because you know It's about them.
01:40:33
Speaker
there's There's no...
01:40:37
Speaker
There's no place for ah baseball player like me when they're 13... anymore.
01:40:49
Speaker
You know what mean? Because yeah the ones that are good are going to go and do AAU or some traveling, you know what i mean? And the ones that aren't any good our left and there there's there's no reason to have Little League baseball teams at that point outside of these highly competitive ones.
01:41:08
Speaker
so It's a very frustrating situation when you think about the things that kind of crafted your childhood, crafted the ah kind of base the the ah foundation of your life ah not existing anymore because money.
01:41:29
Speaker
Yeah, it's all the late-stage capitalism hell. It's just wild to think about that. and you know like The idea of... you like It looms large in my head, thinking back on it, but like you take guys like...
01:41:46
Speaker
west sidleman and justin basilisco sure and you put them on the same team with a guy like me right right
01:41:59
Speaker
i don't get better because like i'm i'm still fat and weird but it exposed me to a different sort of person who like would normally like if we were just in school together and we were we don't talk on the playground because I'm a different status, right? Instead, we were friends.
01:42:18
Speaker
And that's what Little League did for people like me who weren't actual athletes. Right. Got you in with the basketballs and the sidlements and the moon pies. That's right.
01:42:29
Speaker
The Leigh fights and the Neath fights. It gave you his little seat at the table. Because see, when we were kids, though, like, parents didn't give a shit about the fucking sports. youre Like, you had to beg them to take you to fucking sign. Like, I remember begging my mom to go sign up at the goddamn place for Little League. And it's like...
01:42:50
Speaker
My mom loved that shit. My mom was always there screaming her head off, even though I sucked. No, that's one thing. But like what I'm saying is, she's not crafting her self-worth off of your fucking playing time. Correct. Yeah, no. You know? Yeah.
01:43:04
Speaker
That's the difference. what you're getting from these dads who were like me, but didn't have as big a brain. And then they grew up and they went, no, no, no, my son's going to be different. God damn it.
01:43:15
Speaker
Yeah, that's another thing. like you know You see some of the... Like, usually like kids, ah coaches, sons or whatever hard ass. But then there's like this other kind of, I see some of these parents and I'm like, you didn't do a goddamn thing, athletic, in your whole fucking life.
01:43:36
Speaker
I can tell looking at you, like, what, how do you, how are you sitting here and yelling at your kid about any kind of fucking athletic endeavor at all?
01:43:49
Speaker
Like there was one kid that was really his parents were just so bad about that. it was super evident one year and you could just tell the kid was going to just have an awful fucking existence. And I felt awful about it, but he he was just a shithead. Well, second I think my dog shit in the kitchen. Oh, good.
01:44:14
Speaker
Yeah. Don't fall.
01:44:20
Speaker
I was hoping he'd do like ah comedy fall into the ah couch on the way out. But like he said, that might make a big... we got the baseball documentary just coming out. and That's something.
01:44:36
Speaker
Oh, and we got the Bob Seger commercial for the Chevys. Like a rock. I was strong as I could be. Like a rock.
01:44:50
Speaker
Nothing to ruin your family. It's alright.
01:44:57
Speaker
Hey, Little Rock.
Pop Culture References and Media Analysis
01:45:10
Speaker
Snoopy for MetLife, obviously.
01:45:21
Speaker
Oh, hey, man, look at that. They got the 2000s are back at Taco Bell, man. Oh, dude, that's a seven layer burrito. Maybe when these boys are done, i can.
01:45:32
Speaker
They got a Taco Bell down the street. I think, man, I grabbed me a seven layer burrito and I'll just I'll shove it down my old cock hole. What's that? What's Gabe got?
01:45:48
Speaker
He just stuck something in front of the camera, and I'm not sure what it was. It's probably the dog shit, now that I think about it. What a vile thing to show somebody. I'm gonna yell at him when he gets back.
01:46:03
Speaker
Uh-oh. Bill Cosby? The Cosby Mysteries. Oh, shit. That didn't really take off, did it?
01:46:23
Speaker
Uh-oh. I was jumping around and my dad got up to bat. I think it was, I'm talking about my baseball dad, Ken Griffey Sr. And I ran back upstairs and I grabbed my bat.
01:46:37
Speaker
And I go, there it goes.
01:46:42
Speaker
I said, I just felt it.
01:46:46
Speaker
Okay, I got to go. Tell my dad, Tony Khan, hello, if you see him at his wrestling show tonight.
01:46:58
Speaker
We got Cone on the mound, Justice at bat. Gabe in the shadows. I can see him in the background.
01:47:13
Speaker
Joe Morgan talking about a bunch of little kids he saw we're back in the old All-Star game days. Pretty concerning.
01:47:24
Speaker
There's a lot of concerning things about Joe, though, quite frankly.
01:47:35
Speaker
I'm not sure if we've had any defensive substitutions yet. Uh-oh. There's noise in the background.
01:47:48
Speaker
often envision a home invasion situation in Gabe's scene here. That window is just trouble waiting to happen if you ask me.
01:47:59
Speaker
Somebody's going to come through it one night.
01:48:09
Speaker
Cone is in for his second inning.
01:48:16
Speaker
Hey, look, there he is. Guess who's back. Is it illegal to kill a dog? Back again. Yeah, it probably is. Gizzle's back to offend.
01:48:27
Speaker
Guess who's back. Guess who's back. Guess who's back. ah gave me I love Marshall. He's from Detroit. He says to offend? think he says i thought he said tell a friend.
01:48:40
Speaker
um think he says both. All this time. hi i don't know. No, I don't know. i don't care I like the idea of to offend. it makes me I think we've got to find out, though.
01:48:52
Speaker
you go I'm pretty sure he says both. I'm not the biggest M&M fan. and The World Championship of Basketball starts August 7th on NBC.
01:49:05
Speaker
I don't remember that.
01:49:11
Speaker
Hey, look, it's Carlos Garcia. Yeah, my dog shit on the floor in the kitchen as soon as I let him out of the hallway. That's good. Mainly just to to show me what's what. And I smelled something meaty in the air, and I just knew he must have shit.
01:49:26
Speaker
And he did. So I go in there and I grab a paper towel to pick up the shit. Of course, because i have a I have a hardwood oak floor in there and it has, it's it's it's like, you know, it's relatively light wood, but it has like knots in it. So it like gets dark in places and it's kind of like spotted.
01:49:46
Speaker
I missed a giant one, just stepped right in the shit. It was fantastic. I had socks on, thank God. Thank God. Yeah, i hate the... i hate because i Then I gotta take a shower, get the shit off my foot.
01:50:00
Speaker
You
01:50:05
Speaker
put it in the shower? Put it in the shower? Put what in the shower? thought you said you put your foot in the shower. No, if if if I had stepped on it without a... Without a sock on... I don't know what fucking song I'm looking up.
01:50:23
Speaker
Oh.
01:50:26
Speaker
I thought it was on the real Slim Shady. hang ah I'd see Ozzy get a hit. ah ah I created an a monster. Nobody wants to see Marshall in the morning.
01:50:43
Speaker
If you want Shady, this is what I'll give you. A little bag of weed, maybe some hard liquor, some vodka, then I'll jumpstart my heart quicker than the doctor when I was at the hospital with the doctor and I'm not cooperating. Hmm.
01:51:00
Speaker
you got it is it Is it just called Guess Who's Back? I don't know. I thought you were asleep for like two minutes. but
01:51:12
Speaker
Look at those beautiful high tops of Bagwells.
01:51:17
Speaker
I love those.
01:51:23
Speaker
I would wear nothing but the those high top cleats after this.
01:51:31
Speaker
ain't wearing no low fucking top bitch cleats, man.
01:51:39
Speaker
Without Me. What's the name of the song?
01:51:43
Speaker
Oh, yeah. That's it.
01:51:48
Speaker
Maybe that's because they all sound the same. Yeah. That's why they were successful.
01:51:59
Speaker
I see he's having... half um Pablum, Blake. What? Pablum. You've heard the word pablum before? I've heard the word pavlov. Pablum. Pablum is like bland...
01:52:10
Speaker
ah ah ah bland sort of version of entertainment. right oh yeah it's it's it's it's ah It's and for the masses.
01:52:20
Speaker
It's pablum. it It makes people happy. in the you know It's it's the the the science show. ah It's the Big Bang Theory. It's the the the the Charlie Sheen program.
01:52:33
Speaker
Two and a half men. ah That's Pablum. It's not thought about. It's just created on a template. Got you. Pablum.
01:52:44
Speaker
Is that enjoyable?
01:52:48
Speaker
I said, is that enjoyable? To the weak-minded, of course it is. Okay. That's all they need. They don't need more.
01:53:00
Speaker
That's good. Thank you. And they all they all count on it, Blake. They all count on it. They count on us needing two and a half men to make our week better.
01:53:11
Speaker
Does help, doesn't it? No. What the fuck is this shit? Elijah Wood... no
01:53:25
Speaker
what the fuck is this shit elijah wood
01:53:31
Speaker
He has a hat with an E.
01:53:42
Speaker
that Bruce Willis?
01:53:48
Speaker
It's Rob Ryder movie. I remember seeing the box at the movie tv movie movie store, but I don't remember ever renting it.
01:54:00
Speaker
No, I never watched that one. My goodness. This Kangaroo Jr. commercial is incredible. It was on one time when you got up, too.
01:54:17
Speaker
Oh, see, that's that's why it wasn't. That wasn't at Harry's Holy Cow. Yeah.
01:54:28
Speaker
I had a great new flavor of Gatorade over the weekend, Blake. Oh, did you? Yep. Please tell me more. ah I'm looking up the flavor now. I remember basically what it was. Wasn't that good? It was the tastiest ah flavor I've had in a very, very long time.
01:54:50
Speaker
um Better than the blue, better than the red.
01:54:55
Speaker
Better than the cherry like the cherry blue one that they have. It's called Electric Flash.
01:55:03
Speaker
Everything you've used to describe these flavors has been very unhelpful.
01:55:12
Speaker
Red, blue, kind of like the cherry blue, Electric Flash. Could be 50 different things. It's called Electric Flash, right? Yeah, no, I got it.
01:55:25
Speaker
What flavor it is exactly, I'm unsure of. I'm looking it up now to see what it what if there's like people online are like, oh, this is definitely this flavor and that flavor. It tasted a little like a blue flavor, right?
01:55:38
Speaker
And a little bit like grape.
01:55:42
Speaker
Like blue raspberry. Yeah. Right?
01:55:53
Speaker
Ah, we have a double switch with Marquise Grissom and Ken Hill in.
01:56:00
Speaker
ah According to the fine folks at Gatorade, it features a bold, citrus-charged flavor with an electrifying finish.
01:56:17
Speaker
Oh, yeah, that makes sense. Those who found it already are saying the same thing about it. which is it tastes like lemonade. Yeah, it kind of tastes like grape lemonade. Oh, okay.
01:56:29
Speaker
They used to have a Kool-Aid that was that flavor that I loved. The blue lemonade Kool-Aid was my favorite, too.
01:56:41
Speaker
was like grape. I enjoyed it quite a bit. Oh, really? Okay, this one was like a blue raspberry. What the fuck was that flavor? The Kool-Aid, I mean.
01:56:53
Speaker
Let's look that up now.
01:57:03
Speaker
You Bob Costas talking about Mel Stottlemyre and some kind of... ah yeah, it's Purplesaurus Rex. Dentist problem. Purplesaurus Rex. Yep. Nice.
01:57:15
Speaker
You can get a vintage package on eBay for 50 bucks.
01:57:23
Speaker
Sounds like a great idea.
01:57:30
Speaker
Fuck me. Yep. Okay.
01:57:40
Speaker
God, man. Look at that. i One of the better parts of childhood was being at the grocery store with my mom and Her saying to me, why don't they have these? Do they still have these? or These are, these are, these are 10 for a dollar or the Weilers are 12 for a dollar. Pick out 10 that you want.
01:58:06
Speaker
And like your world opens up. You know what i mean? Like, oh my God, I can have 10 of anything I want. Sharkleberry. And these little things. Yeah. Come on. I want a gallon of that shit right now.
01:58:21
Speaker
Right now. My mom would put like two and a half full cups of sugar in each goddamn two-quart container.
01:58:37
Speaker
Chili Davis in.
01:58:42
Speaker
They still have Sharkleberry Finn.
01:58:47
Speaker
That's something, I guess. Invisible grape.
01:58:56
Speaker
Guess I could always make my own, huh?
01:59:00
Speaker
We got another got another movie trailer here for Arnold.
01:59:15
Speaker
Jamie, oh, is it True Lies? Sure is. Boy, oh boy. James Cameron film.
01:59:26
Speaker
From the guy who brought you Avatar, who brings you true lies. Apparently, you need to make sure to use Concord grapes if you make your own.
01:59:37
Speaker
That's great. I'm i' glad you're checking all this out. Using your TikTok for all the recipes that but you need for at-home Kool-Aid.
01:59:48
Speaker
Oh, here we go. Purposaurus Rex drink mix. Well, they basically just mix together a grape and a lemonade Kool-Aid.
01:59:56
Speaker
Yeah, that makes sense, I guess.
02:00:01
Speaker
Let me tell you something, alright? This is the best Kool-Aid ever. Colonel Kool-Aid here.
02:00:09
Speaker
Oh, hey, man. There ain't nothing better on a hot day to when you're, when you're man, I'll tell you, when your old yeah dick sucker's dry, you just get some nice, cool purple Sorcerer X-Man and just drink about three liters of that shit.
02:00:24
Speaker
Mmm. I fill about halfway up with sugar. Mm-hmm. And then I liquefy the rest of it, man.
02:00:33
Speaker
Hey, there's a Buick.
02:00:39
Speaker
LeSabre. It's not a LeSabre convertible, but... I drank a slab of ribs in the back of a LeSabre one time.
02:00:48
Speaker
It was pretty hot, man.
02:00:53
Speaker
Can I just give this little peek behind the curtain? i I need y'all to to keep keep your ears open for when when Credence talks about drinking different meats. ah Just be aware that it's a thing and and it makes so much more sense than you could possibly ever understand.
02:01:13
Speaker
i guess I ain't ever noticed, a man. I do that, huh?
02:01:17
Speaker
Hmm. Hmm. Hmm.
02:01:23
Speaker
hey yeah out me Oh, God, man. he okay? That one's for Adam, dude. I just drank some gyro meat. yeah ah
02:01:39
Speaker
Well, you better go eat you a glass of water, dude. yeah Yeah.
02:01:47
Speaker
Mike Mussina on the mound.
02:01:54
Speaker
Ah, yes. Fresh off of the 93 All-Star controversy. I'll have to remind Gabe of this when he gets back from his water eating.
02:02:23
Speaker
Great point by Bob. the The first two pitch hitters Cito has used that have been the designated hitters that weren't going to be able to play in the field. would come in handy in extra innings.
02:02:35
Speaker
Oh, look at that. Big time with his PWT fucking super cooler koozie drink thingy. Tumbler, that's what they call those things now. This isn't just any Tumbler.
02:02:53
Speaker
This is that one, yeah, Stanley. It's Stanley. man Well, I'm sure Dirty Donald will draw some art of you beating the shit out of me with that. Did you see the picture you made of you?
02:03:05
Speaker
I did. It made me so happy. Me on the ground surrounded by animal crackers with your PWT sign. Jesus.
02:03:18
Speaker
That was awesome.
02:03:22
Speaker
He's trained his AI very well.
02:03:26
Speaker
Yeah, be a lot to explain if somebody got a hold of it.
02:03:32
Speaker
The fuck do I care? Take me to the gulag. Not you, you idiot. No, I don't... In any situation, i don't care. i know, you've made that very clear. Death is is welcomed around the corner.
02:03:56
Speaker
I got too many things to put in my fucking cock holder, man, to die. You know what he told me the other day? he said... He said... What did he say?
02:04:11
Speaker
Uh...
02:04:15
Speaker
Shit. That's the whole ball game. ha ha ha. Ha ha ha.
02:04:26
Speaker
What did he say? God damn it. Shut up. He's piqued my interest, folks. This is the salesman in him.
02:04:39
Speaker
Oh, that's right. No, I didn't even have to get there. Now I remember. he said, he said it might not be so good for you to get high like this.
02:04:53
Speaker
As he puffed on his eighth 60 milligram pen of the day. i thought you were talking about creepy. No, you.
02:05:04
Speaker
Let's all go to the lobby. Let's all go to the lobby. Let's all go to the lobby to get ourselves a treat.
02:05:15
Speaker
Delicious things to eat. The popcorn can't be beat. The sparkling drinks are just dandy. The chocolate bars and the candy.
02:05:27
Speaker
So let's all go to the lobby get ourselves a treat. Let's all go to the lobby to get ourselves a treat.
02:05:40
Speaker
Happy birthday, gay boy. And we are proud of you. One hour, 54 minutes because... ah Obviously, we recorded over two days and Blake fucked up his microphone. and I've done it all. that I've done it in the past. It wasn't just his fault, man. So we're gonna we're going to keep things on a positive clip this time around. and Hopefully have less long silences and less dis just disturbing, depressing talk.
02:06:13
Speaker
But set your timers to one hour, 54 minutes, and 42 seconds on YouTube.
02:06:30
Speaker
What are we playing here? Is this a Philly Sea? Yeah.
02:06:38
Speaker
I don't care anymore. Turn it on, turn it on
Admiration for Baseball Legends
02:06:43
Speaker
again. was about to grab my microphone, but I figured that would shut down the operation Yeah, probably so.
02:06:49
Speaker
Look at Barry Bonds, man. What a swing. what a What a bat. What a set of earrings. What a hitter. What a player. My goodness. He is a BMF if there ever was one. I'm scared to death of Barry Bonds.
02:07:04
Speaker
See, I'm not scared of him because I think... art
02:07:11
Speaker
yeah joe Yeah, Joe is letting us know that he chokes up on the bat about an inch and a half, just in case you couldn't see that. Yeah, that's always been a signature. He struck out. Yeah, you know, he's been swinging for the fences every fucking bat. He just wants to hit a homer to shove it up these people's asses. Mm-hmm.
02:07:35
Speaker
Oh, my goodness.
02:07:39
Speaker
I think I talked about it while you were up chasing down that dog or whatever, but the year prior, there was some controversy because the game was in Baltimore, and Mike Mussina didn't get into the game, and manager Cito Gaston took some shit for that, and here he is in the game. mate He wanted to make sure because he's the manager again.
02:08:02
Speaker
Mike Piazza wanted to hit that one out of the park, too. He swung really hard at that ball. My goodness. My goodness.
02:08:14
Speaker
You know what they say, Blake. You never drive away from good surf. That's what you've told me.
02:08:22
Speaker
Live slow, surf fast, baby.
02:08:27
Speaker
talking about, like, surfing waves? Well, yeah, dude. I mean, look.
02:08:33
Speaker
There's not really much in life that you can can't fix with a with say yeah a day out on the waves, man. What are you doing?
02:08:47
Speaker
Just talking about life, brother. What is this shit? There ain't no shit. well this is just Look, man. You're in a tank top and you got a backwards hat and you're talking about surfing. You're doing something weird.
02:08:59
Speaker
What is it? Get it out. God damn it.
02:09:06
Speaker
When the surf's up, your life is too, man. That's all. That's all it is. i don't you know like Everybody has to reinvent themselves sometime. and i found Oh, God. like The negativity's got to go. and The most positive people I know...
02:09:24
Speaker
Brother, they live by the water. They live by the rules of the water. And so got that's what I'm going to do. The only thing negative in my life right now is that exactly what it says on my hat.
02:09:40
Speaker
Uh-huh. What is that? I can't read it. it does like it's it's I'd rather be drinking at Margaritaville. That's right, man. yeah yeah What else is there, dude? Sure, yeah, I guess that is the question.
02:09:58
Speaker
You know, you're nibbling on sponge cake, you're watching the sun bake all of the tourists covered with oil. It's beautiful thing. What's to be upset about?
02:10:14
Speaker
I don' feel like I'm in 1995 WWF and Gabe just underwent a gimmick change and he's going to feud with the goon. Maybe TL Hopper.
02:10:24
Speaker
Look, man. We need surfer guy. Make that one fat negative guy a fat surfer positive guy. Have him talk about the surfs up and and tits down. i don't know.
02:10:38
Speaker
10 up, 10 down, baby. Ha ha. Oh, it's the big hurt. he's just go make He's wearing the pumps. He's wearing the Reebok pumps. That's what this commercial's for, everybody.
02:10:50
Speaker
See, not only only you're are you pumping the pumps now, you're injecting air into the pumps. if we if If we just get back to the the the thesis, right, of what this program was supposed to be at the beginning, like everything would be better in life generally. Like we'd fix our lives. We'd fix their lives.
02:11:13
Speaker
You know, but Adam agrees. Adam understands. Adam's listening. He gets it. Adam does understand. Yeah. Yeah. So, you know, that's that's what we got to do, dude. Doesn't like Jimmy, but that's fine. Brother, brother you know, look, he's going to come around on Jimmy. What's not to love about Jimmy Hart, you know? It's because I'm positive,
02:11:34
Speaker
All Jimmy is is positive. He just keeps on dancing no matter what. Terry's gone, doesn't fucking matter. Teeth are crooked, doesn't fucking matter. He keeps on dancing. I don't know about crooked, baby. do He goes, he burns the boat down for you because he loves you, man. And that's it.
02:11:53
Speaker
Oh, hey, look, it's the little weird guy from SNL. That was a big deal. we're We're all equal before a wave, dude. That's what it comes down to.
02:12:04
Speaker
Came upon me wave on wave, right? That's right. Pat Green on the whole ballgame. we love that Texas country music here on the ballgame, as you know. Yeah, he's kind of a douchebag, though. The planesman.
02:12:17
Speaker
I ever tell you the story about having Pat Green come into the radio station? Probably didn't. Gonna tell it now. You and the Pie jerk him off? No, no, no, no. was on the weekend. Oh, yeah. You guys only do that during in the week. yeah Yeah, dude. Come on.
02:12:34
Speaker
um There's gotta be a lot of people around if we're gonna jerk somebody off. Dude, look at his ass. Just committed to this fucking gimmick. Yeah, dude.
02:12:43
Speaker
I don't know what you're talking about. You're gonna be tan as fuck next time I see you, aren't you? Nah, I'm not. Look, I don't... I... I burn real easy. I don't think that's in the cards, but it is what it is, man. Look, is this Doug Drabeck on the mound? Is that who that is? It is. Looking good.
02:13:00
Speaker
Looking real good, Doug Drabeck. My goodness. Looks like the Mike the Mullet Man Summers if he had blonde hair, actually. Kind of does if he was a little less fat. and Anyway, um yeah, so Wave on Wave wasn't the first one.
02:13:17
Speaker
ah Carry On, the Carry On song. Yeah, yeah. Kind of got national airplay, and it was the first time that I had ever heard of Pat Green, even though I'd been listening to country music since I was knee-high a grasshopper. Yeah, he was pretty popular in Texas before that. Yeah, was big-time. You know, I did my research on him and realized that he was selling out stadium shows in Texas, but nowhere else in the country gave a
Musicians and the Concept of 'Selling Out'
02:13:39
Speaker
shit about him. Yeah,
02:13:40
Speaker
Right? yeah But he came through with that Carry On song, and I really liked that song. And so ah he was coming to Chicago for a concert at a club show. a club show i think he was at the House of Blues, as a matter of fact.
02:13:54
Speaker
And so I called his record company, and I was like, we have a radio station in northwest Indiana that's like within the Chicago market, technically. uh, would he like to come on the program, uh, with me on a Saturday and, you know, play a couple songs and pitch the, uh, the show that night and in Chicago. And lo and behold, he said, yes. And they came in and I, it was my, my, uh, Saturday afternoon show, 10 to two on the country station from Chicago South Bend, Indiana, one Oh five.
02:14:26
Speaker
Yeah. Uh, and he came in and he was a great guy and he, uh, I forgot to get him to sign the CD, so i I forged the signature on the CD for my program director because I know he would have been pissed off at me.
02:14:38
Speaker
Yeah, that's good thing. Gave us tickets to go see him that night, and we went up there. My girlfriend at the time wasn't old enough to get into the House of Blues, and so I missed it.
02:14:52
Speaker
School night? um No, she was 19. and We were out of school, but like... I was two years older so I could get in, but she couldn't. Anyway, yeah, Pat Green.
02:15:05
Speaker
You know that he redid that song. That was the one you, he had done it years before and then he kind of pop countryed it up and that was the version he loved. Oh, is that what it was? All right. I'll have to go back and into the archives there and listen to the original. I bet it's better.
02:15:26
Speaker
yeah it's not, you know, was it's whatever. I mean, the the music videos... This has enough Green talk for my taste. Yeah, I think you're probably right. You really don't like Pat Green. Man, oh man.
02:15:37
Speaker
Why is that? Is it because it's like the the generic, like the Aldi version of the music that you like? Yeah, i mean, he kind of sold out. Okay, there it is. All right, no, that's good enough for me. I just didn't know why. Sell out, that's fine. I'm just, I'm not going to like you.
02:15:52
Speaker
only way of all way But then it's like the same. i still you yeah it's It's the same thing though with all those fucking guys. like They all sell out. None of them make it.
02:16:05
Speaker
And then they come back home. And and they play yeah they play their Texas dates and they make their money. and It just pisses me the fuck out. Don't come back home. Fuck you.
02:16:19
Speaker
That's a steal right there. But Yeah. it's all bag I've, I've been to a few Pat green shows. I've seen it. It's fine. That's good.
02:16:31
Speaker
That's good, man. Like it's all good. That's what this all comes. That's what it all comes back to. you know Yeah. Right. Yeah. No, it's going to be fine. Like what,
02:16:42
Speaker
but You know? And frankly, this is all because of you. So I don't know what you're complaining about. I'm not complaining. What am I complaining about? I don't know.
02:16:53
Speaker
Good, good. Then we're on the same page. Positivity reigns. Let's go. no I'm not complaining about just you over there making grunts and noises and what sounds like every third word. It's fine. I'm not complaining about any of that. what do you mean? I'm not grunting. That's my headphones. mike I think my equipment's going bad. That's me Oh, okay. I can send you.
02:17:13
Speaker
I got a blue microphone here that I don't use anymore. I can send to you if you want me to. what I've come to learn in in most of well all my relationships really is that I am the issue. you know It is me.
02:17:25
Speaker
And if I just change, man you know I can make everything work. Listen, dude. That's nonsense. man. Hey, dude. That sounds like sounds like somebody could be a tenant down at the Second Family. You know what, dude?
02:17:40
Speaker
I talked to Creedence's brother this morning. Oh, man. You didn't talk to that dirty son, bitch. Great guy. talked like 11 or 12 minutes. It's Top Guy weekend in St. Louis this weekend. You didn't talk for six or seven minutes?
02:17:59
Speaker
So he's an 11. It was a full 11 minutes, brother. Six, seven. Six, seven. po Sure. I get it. Anyway, ah we talked. ah He's got Top Guy Weekend in St. Louis this weekend to go along with the AEW Wrestle Dream event.
02:18:16
Speaker
oh Oh, wow. Right? And so, ah you know, he's going to buy some merchandise. He's going to make some introductions for me to some of the guys that run some of the bigger wrestling conventions around the country that he knows. Wow.
02:18:32
Speaker
So, so gracious and so... um ah What's word I'm looking for? ah Generous. Disingenuous.
02:18:44
Speaker
And his... Ah, that's crazy talk, man. like you know If you think that that comes from a place of disingenuity, I think you are just looking at the world the wrong way, man. like That could be true. Dude, this this guy is not Credence by any means. He's 100% up and up on the level.
02:19:07
Speaker
Nothing at all. to be concerned about. It sounds like somebody has, has climbed their way back up in the trust tree.
02:19:17
Speaker
I don't want to brag about it, man. You know, yeah yeah I don't want to count my chickens, uh, before they hatch. Sure. So, So we're gonna we're going to walk that line and and just try to figure this thing out and get this thing back on track. Hopefully I can get up a couple rungs. I got a couple welts on my back from the fall. so Sure, yeah. you know At the end of the day at the end of the day, you cannot stop the waves, but you can learn to surf.
02:19:48
Speaker
Right, yeah, got it. Speaking of the fall, I was reading this internet article and it don't trust them brother it don't yeah i know i got you but as you are a disney adult i am yeah yeah you and kg 20 posters yep yep yeah kg 24 and his dad tony khan uh there he hey there he is he's probably been to disney i noticed he started talking about me blake that's why i'm looking at the camera right now yeah no that makes a lot of yeah got it um
02:20:23
Speaker
But apparently there is this trend of in a specific hotel even. But people will go and check in and then they often commit suicide.
02:20:33
Speaker
Like they go to Disney for this one last happy memory and then they just jump off of this hotel. Are you familiar with this? it's Yeah, it's the ah the contemporary hotel. yeah right there outside It's right there outside of the Magic Kingdom.
02:20:48
Speaker
um just a you know a short walk from the gates of Magic Kingdom over to the Contemporary. I don't think I'd ever stay there because it's a little bland and boring. It's kind of just like a regular hotel, except for the fact that the...
02:21:00
Speaker
the the ah monorail just run runs right through there and like there's a stop in the middle of it which is cool right but it also allows for the opportunity to kill yourself ah because it's like you know it's so one of those hotels where like you're in the middle and you can look up and you see all the rooms like and I think she just jumped right over onto the the monorail tracks this most recent one we got an air big hurts right we do
02:21:33
Speaker
My goodness, he is really hoofing it, too. Yeah. Thomas scores. Everybody's safe. And American League is trying to claw back that lead from the National League here in Pittsburgh.
02:21:47
Speaker
and Anyway. Yeah, a lot of starters in. It's a thing that happens. But you know what? Officially, no one has ever died on Disney property. Yeah, I read that. That was disturbing what they do.
02:22:02
Speaker
It is so disturbing. It really is. But I still love it. So it's cool, man. There it is. Yeah, right. That's the most American thing I've ever heard.
02:22:15
Speaker
and From the lakes of Minnesota. You got your trip booked next year. hills of Tennessee. Across the plains Texas. From sea to shining sea. I saw they raised their prices, so that's nice. From Detroit to Houston.
02:22:29
Speaker
have got tariff. And New York to L.A. Kirby with an RBI. yeah Carter scores on that one. I believe we're close to tied up. I think four to three now. Is that there is that right?
02:22:41
Speaker
think that's right. Sounds good.
02:22:46
Speaker
But yeah, ah not a good situation when you you go to Disney ask your for your lap. Look, I get it though.
Disney: Magic and Dark Realities
02:22:53
Speaker
I do. there's ah There's a certain joy that that being in the park brings that that really...
02:23:01
Speaker
You know what? You're going to hate this. Holy shit. It's the same thing that we do with this program is what you get when you walk into Magic Kingdom. I'm sorry. I shouldn't say that.
02:23:13
Speaker
It's what I get when I walk into Magic Kingdom. Yes. No, we get vastly different things. Yeah. It's a place where the past is all that matters.
02:23:25
Speaker
there Or or the the certain place that you're in in that very moment. And the rest of the world just fucking drifts away. that's That's the magic for me when you go. is like It's like I can pretend that the rest of the world doesn't exist.
02:23:38
Speaker
Not that I don't already do that in some small way every moment because I'm so good at compartmentalizing shit. that's why It's why I'm able to be the bullshitter that I am and you're not able to do it. It's because of that compartmentalization thing that my brain allows me to do.
02:23:55
Speaker
But guess what? Guess what? yeah That shit leads to depression, pal. That shit leads to not feeling good about anything until you just figure out, man, that you throw on a tank top and put your hat backwards.
02:24:11
Speaker
Everything's going to be fine. And we got Little Rascals movie trailers on the All-Star Game broadcast. I mean, what could be better? I heard there's a lot of sexual assault on that set.
02:24:31
Speaker
I mean Alfalfa, dude.
02:24:49
Speaker
Every wave and every day is different. Well said.
02:24:58
Speaker
Oh, boy. You know, surfing's a lot like life, Blake. Yeah, yeah.
02:25:03
Speaker
can Yeah, I'm not... No, that's it. That's all i got. All right.
02:25:11
Speaker
Oh. Michael here on this point. had question for you, and I've just yeah already totally... No, I forgot. Yeah, I talked too much. No, it was... he did You did well. You're good.
02:25:26
Speaker
wing Wings is moving to Tuesday. My goodness. I'm not watching any of that. Wings and Frasier. Absolutely. I'd watch.
02:25:37
Speaker
I didn't watch Frasier. I've seen Frasier almost as much as I've seen every episode of Seinfeld. That's unsettling. Oh, it's a great show. That writing on that show is fucking impeccable.
02:25:50
Speaker
that That's great. Wonderful. Wonderful program. David Hyde Pierce, brilliant comedic actor. Very underrated. Really shame that he's not done more.
02:26:01
Speaker
That accent does a lot of work for him.
02:26:06
Speaker
What accent? One uses on the show. It's the voice. no Maybe not accent, voice. That's what I meant.
02:26:16
Speaker
Yeah, so today, ah like I said, I talked to i talked to to Mr. Thompson. That was really great. Really enjoyed having that conversation. Just a couple of positive dudes being positive, huh? It was unbelievable.
02:26:30
Speaker
I'm sure there's no intellectual dishonesty. i was I was a little nervous on the phone and everything. like Yeah. ah like you know yeah you're You're in the presence of a guy like that who's got as much money as he does and and carries as much water, you know especially for the industry that we're both in.
02:26:48
Speaker
much weight is what I thought you were to say. no, no. Water. it we're It's mostly water weight. Were you worried that he was going to have you physically harmed for talking about his daughter?
02:27:00
Speaker
i Well, there's that, right? yeah I was waiting for that. Like, hey, man, I ah i was listening to that but podcast y'all do. Something like that, but no. Then he realized nobody listens to it. Correct. Yeah, yeah, yeah. He didn't ask me your name, so I think we're all right.
02:27:15
Speaker
but He's fine. He'll just show up. That's... it's He'll say Casio.
02:27:24
Speaker
God damn it. You'll get fucking Hancock.
02:27:33
Speaker
Oh...
02:27:38
Speaker
Iron Man struck out. Man, you know, you always know exactly what to say, man.
02:27:50
Speaker
What a dude. What a dude. Guys, you realize how lucky we are to have Blake around? Do you get that? Do you understand? i don't know that you you guys do. like without Without Blake, I don't exist anymore.
02:28:04
Speaker
and You know what mean? like That's just the reality of the situation. I don't know what's happening right now.
02:28:12
Speaker
Just go with it, dude. like Okay. We're just being positive. Is this a positive thing? Okay. All right. Yeah. It feels sort of weird and not real positive, but if you say so, i mean, it's your intention.
02:28:32
Speaker
Streaks on the China never mattered before. Who cares?
02:28:39
Speaker
I love these True Lies commercials all over. the That's the third different a trailer that we've gotten for
Nostalgia for Movie Promotions and Games
02:28:47
Speaker
it. It's the one where Jamie Lee Curtis dances erotically, right?
02:28:51
Speaker
Yeah. Got a Pennzoil commercial here as well. Yeah. ah yeah look like a real straight shooter.
02:29:06
Speaker
Got the Brickyard 400 scratching. Hey, yeah McDonald's is back. I saw that, yeah. Fuck. Monopoly is back at McDonald's. Right, right. How are you feeling?
02:29:18
Speaker
ah Pretty good. Pretty good. I've got to got lots of game pieces. Uh-oh, look at that. ye huh There's some more.
02:29:30
Speaker
There's some more. i think i i think Gaber talked about this last time. But old Gaber's a little on tilt with the food lately. Right, yeah. He talked about... Yeah, he did.
02:29:44
Speaker
Great detail. That's good. he's ah He's gone to McDonald's quite a bit in the last couple of days. One, two, three, four, five, six, seven, eight, nine, ten eleven, twelve.
02:30:02
Speaker
I got thirteen game pieces just right here. that's That's probably in the last three or four days. Yeah, a couple extra value meals there, right? couple extra value meals, ah large soda pops,
02:30:17
Speaker
ah breakfast after I dropped Jamie at work the other morning, got myself a steak, egg, and cheese bagel, man. wow What a beautiful sandwich that is.
02:30:30
Speaker
But yeah, I want a little bit of free food. I i got i got two of the green properties. so That's exciting, right? I got two two of the railroads as well.
02:30:41
Speaker
um You know, Will Clark has entered the ballgame in in in in lieu of of Frank Thomas at first base.
02:30:55
Speaker
There it is. um Got a lot of backups in now. There's the big unit.
02:31:02
Speaker
Oh, look at me. Looking good. That's a tall drink of water there, Blake.
02:31:10
Speaker
So I've got a stack here as well um with an envelope right next to me. ah Two envelopes, as a matter of fact. One for Donald and ah one for old Maya, who we owe some stuff to. But I've got a A Big Daddy Rick Rushall autographed like at that baseball card.
Fast Food and Personal Preferences
02:31:36
Speaker
That's worth at least $175,000. Got a Steve Balboni auto. oh wow. Nice. That's spicy. Sure. Because meatball that he just ate. It looks like he's eating his hand.
02:31:48
Speaker
It does. We've got Craig Lindsay Lefferts. I was actually watching the 87 playoffs, and he came in. Watch your back, Jack.
02:32:00
Speaker
C-L-L. You got old Wally Backman in a twins uniform. That's right. Move on. That's what Wally says. Oh, Charlie Huff here.
02:32:15
Speaker
oh look at that. That's a Late early I think. Yeah, 1980. The picture was from 79, certainly. ah yeah nineteen eighty and the picture was um seventy nine certainly And then my favorite,
02:32:33
Speaker
the Ho-Ho's. Nice. Does love McDonald's, but not as much as you, apparently. Not as much as me. Ain't no doubt about it. that that That quarter pounder cheeseburger at McDonald's is...
02:32:48
Speaker
is the number one a burger in fast food in my estimation. and it it Well, let's not say that. Let's not say the best in fast food. Let's the best of the big three.
02:33:00
Speaker
It's better than Burger King. It's better than Wendy's. I don't think it's better than Whopper. It is. Yeah. and I love Whopper. I understand. i understand it. i don't I don't care for malted ah anything except for Ovaltine, so I'm not a big fan of Whopper's.
02:33:19
Speaker
That was a candy joke, everybody. Keep on surfing. Yeah, keep on... Keep on surfing, bird. Brother.
02:33:32
Speaker
I am drinking just a metric fuckton of crystal light peach tea. Oh, yeah. And it's delightful.
02:33:43
Speaker
I thought you were going to say crystal meth. Mm-mm. Mm-mm. I only take one drug here in this household. That's positivity.
02:33:56
Speaker
but Positivity. T-E-A. Get it? How's that affect your A1C? I don't ask questions. went to the doctor yesterday.
02:34:07
Speaker
as a home That's a home run. Marquise Grissom goes yard on Randy Johnson. Exposed.
02:34:17
Speaker
but got Well, you in col I didn't come in planning to give up the lead, Blake. I don't know what it is you want from me.
02:34:27
Speaker
i just want some transparency for myself. I guess I'm talking to myself. I don't know what's happened. Look how bald Matt Williams is. goodness, look at his head. Jesus Christ. He looks like a ah elementary school principal.
02:34:43
Speaker
He's going to spank some children. You know, I imagine that's what Dave looks like underneath his rug. He doesn't have rug. Well, you don't maybe as far as you know, he doesn't have rug. I've looked down upon it. It's not a rug.
02:34:58
Speaker
It's it's sort just evaporating hair. The point stands. I think if he bald, that's what he's going to look like. That's absurd.
02:35:09
Speaker
hes That is really something. He's going to look way worse than that. And he's not going to be any good at baseball. Well, I guess there's that, that you know. ah ah uses the shards from broken baseball bats to pick the gap in his front teeth.
02:35:25
Speaker
It's hard to find people that you can't find one redeeming thing about. and I got a few of them. Hey, man, we have fun around here. That's all.
02:35:37
Speaker
That's all. We just... Sure, yeah. We make fun, but that's the operative term fun. Everybody's in on the joke around here. Everybody knows that we're just playing. you know Right, yeah, no.
02:35:51
Speaker
I know exactly what's going on.
02:35:55
Speaker
It's because you're really strong and you're really chill. Sure, yeah. it's It's, you know, I just... Thanks. I'm so lucky, so lucky to be in your orbit. I can never pull off what you pull off.
02:36:12
Speaker
Okay, yeah, thank you. I like Ozzy's helmet.
02:36:18
Speaker
He ain't no bitch. of
02:36:33
Speaker
I like the organist music. This is really good. du it did did do did did did I feel like I'm at the ball game. How could you, how could we be watching this masterpiece of a baseball game and not be happy, man? Like, look at, ah look at, you know,
02:36:48
Speaker
You got to look on the bright side of life. Look at that. Oz goes deep. Randy Johnson getting lit up here Pittsburgh. Oh, that's a real shame.
02:37:03
Speaker
was going to say, I don't feel like I remember that, but now when I wouldn't put it past me. I thought it went out of the... i thought I didn't think that was foul. That's crazy talk. Well, my goodness.
02:37:14
Speaker
Your positivity couldn't will it fair. Yeah. You mean positivity can't change the past? That's some bullshit, man.
02:37:25
Speaker
But it's okay. We're okay. Good, thank you. I'm glad. Yeah. It's my pleasure.
02:37:34
Speaker
Would you say you're also HIV positive?
02:37:39
Speaker
Well, look, I haven't had a test in a long time, but I've been on the ah um the maintenance drug for years, and I don't think I've given it to anybody. least I hope I haven't.
02:37:49
Speaker
Of course, I haven't asked either. This fucking guy has been shitting the bed in his home fucking game. Well, let's see. He didn't deserve to be in the All-Star game. Yeah, he's showing why he sucks.
02:38:03
Speaker
Yeah.
02:38:13
Speaker
You suck, Carlos.
02:38:20
Speaker
You know Will Clark said to him, right? I can imagine. Fuck you! Probably asked him if he needed to call ice to help him get off the field.
02:38:35
Speaker
Like that Lady of the Brewers game. i i felt Yeah, I saw the i saw the clip. She's got Manfred in stadium now. Terrible human being. I'm glad. At least from Milwaukee did something about it. Good for them.
02:38:45
Speaker
ah No, Will Clark, I've decided... He's only got a two word vocabulary, but it's, it's, it's, it's just, he just says, fuck you in different like tones.
02:38:58
Speaker
Uh, but it's like, like he's Groot, right? So he's saying other things and some people can understand him. Most people just hear, fuck you. That's just who he is. Yeah. Right. No, that's very positive, uh, take on the situation.
02:39:15
Speaker
Oh, no, no. This is, this was, Gabe came up with that when he was depressed, man. Oh, okay. No, this is, look at, it's another Chevy Astro commercial. I love it. Yeah, this guy and his, his ethnic son are. Denim, denim tucked in denim with no belt, by the way.
02:39:33
Speaker
It's a look, dude. The kid has denim on as well. Yeah, no, and it's light denim tucked into, to, to, to like mid-range denim. It's a it's ah it's that There are choices being made in wardrobe here.
02:39:48
Speaker
I appreciated it. Good, good. It's the owner of the Falcons. Is that who that is? Yeah. That makes sense. and that china See that giant slab of meat?
02:39:58
Speaker
Mm-hmm.
02:40:01
Speaker
Well, I'll tell you this, Arthur. Nobody in your store knows where the fuck anything is.
02:40:10
Speaker
The last thing you want to do is put limits on customers. Yeah, no, right. I got it. Use the American Express card at Home Depot or go fuck yourself, all right?
02:40:20
Speaker
Ooh, James Earl Jones for whatever gas company this is. It's Texaco, man.
02:40:29
Speaker
Trust your car to the service with a star.
02:40:35
Speaker
Do you know where it what that was from? What movie that was from? i Sounds familiar. Back to the Future Part 2 with the ah ah automated robot Texaco station.
02:40:48
Speaker
Gotcha. ah hu Is that the one where Goldie Wilson had Biff Tannen murdered? Hover conversion. Yeah, no, exactly. Yep.
02:41:01
Speaker
Look at this beautiful Acura commercial driving up to a palatial estate. $399 a month for that Acura. That's insane.
02:41:13
Speaker
That's $100 less than my car payment. That's fantastic. And I drive a minivan.
02:41:20
Speaker
six It's all good though, dude. Where else am going to spend the money? Nowhere, right? just I mean, we got to drive, right? so And yeah the minivan fits the surfboard like perfectly.
02:41:32
Speaker
That is all right, yeah. You just throw it on the top and just strap it on, dude. Hang loose, shocker bra.
02:41:44
Speaker
Nah, dude. you You can't say shit like that. That's cultural appropriation. now ah not We're not going to stand for that here on the ballgame, man. got you You can't do that shit. all right Alright. Gives me chicken skin when you say shit like that, you know?
02:42:00
Speaker
Make sure you cook it or you get salmonella. Hey-o! did i Did I tell you I found a vibrator box outside of the... at work? You did, and i was in the middle of something, but I was gonna stop down and poke on that, but now let's talk about it here. What the fuck?
02:42:18
Speaker
The Mambo Vibe. Okay. Did you take a picture of or you keep it? Did you keep the box? No, I took a picture of it, though. Did you smell it?
02:42:30
Speaker
No. It had a lot of condensation inside of it. the the the The outline of the device was very prominent. and Yeah. yeah It was a very massive...
02:42:47
Speaker
I made sure to show the receptionist to see what she would do. That's wonderful. That was fun. she comment about the size of it? she she laughed.
02:42:57
Speaker
Okay. Well, that's good. least you didn't get appalled and like report you to human resources or anything. I think she's used to a large, large phallic phallic phallic. Is this, this is not the one that's dating the dip. I wouldn't worry about any of that. Oh, all right.
02:43:17
Speaker
Yeah. Uh, she's, I didn't think she'd date anybody. I don't know, but, um, Oh no, that's the She happened to be there. I had to go in and yeah I'm obviously going wash my hands after I pick this thing up.
02:43:32
Speaker
What's she look like?
02:43:35
Speaker
i' Middle-aged chick with a dipshit attitude. and ah So like just about every other woman in
Humorous Takes on Everyday Situations
02:43:44
Speaker
Wichita? A love for massive cock.
02:43:46
Speaker
wonderful Wonderful. It's a shame Tom Hanky ain't in this game.
02:43:55
Speaker
Well, I don't know if the hose would make the cut.
02:44:02
Speaker
Might have to leave the hose running in the yard little while. Jesus Christ. This guy here, my goodness, he just looks like a prototypical baseball player. It's Mickey Tettleson. Yeah, I know. if they If they went to Central Casting and said, hey, we need a baseball player type, and this guy's picture was in the book, he'd get booked every time for that role.
02:44:22
Speaker
That's insane. Strong jawline on Mickey Tettleton. He's from a Oklahoma. That's where the wind comes sweeping down the plain. i want to say he's from Commerce, Mickey Mantle hometown, but I saw him play young boy. He yeah resembles...
02:44:40
Speaker
he resembles ah ah Mickey Mantle a little bit in the face.
02:44:50
Speaker
I watched him when he was a catcher for the Orioles. o He holds... he holds a bat like a solid 2T. I gotta be honest.
02:45:02
Speaker
Yeah, yeah.
02:45:06
Speaker
You know? like but Somewhere between 2 and 3. Well, I guess... yeah this
02:45:20
Speaker
Yeah, how's your territory? don't know what you mean, man.
02:45:27
Speaker
Well, figure it out. We got a little frosty zombie here.
02:45:35
Speaker
ah Cool. My wife took the kid to Wendy's on the way home from Chicago the other day, and like As you do. me dotodoto-doto do to do to do to- do to do
02:45:53
Speaker
It's a mummy, you see. Right. Yeah. yeah And it's also a frosty. yeah Yeah. Makes me want a frosty if I'm being being entirely honest with you, which I rarely am. but no Sure, no.
02:46:08
Speaker
Not often.
02:46:11
Speaker
Ugh. Hi, Mom. Get well, Dad. Have you had any more sex lately? Yeah.
02:46:22
Speaker
Yeah? Yeah. Look at this. No wonder. Oh, look at Ozzy. My goodness. What a wizard. what a What a wizardly play. My goodness.
02:46:33
Speaker
The Wizard of Waverly Place, huh? Yeah. Yeah. I spend a lot of time walking around that area in New York because there are some good little shops in that town or in that like little neighborhood.
02:46:45
Speaker
Yeah. It's the West Village is where Waverly Place is. Oh, thank you. Yes. Yeah. So, but like, and I don't know if this is just...
02:47:02
Speaker
I wasn't there at the right time or, you know, I didn't spend enough time there, but I never saw one wizard. Hmm. Maybe, maybe you didn't believe enough.
02:47:18
Speaker
What's what? No, you're going to see a wizard. You got to believe, you know, believe what? No, you magic.
02:47:30
Speaker
I mean, is there a there's There's a question of belief there. I mean, it just is, right? Nah, it's magic. You got to believe it. Sure. i mean, seeing is believing, no?
02:47:44
Speaker
You got to believe anything, you know?
02:48:01
Speaker
This man's on fire.
02:48:05
Speaker
Look, I'm just stoked. You know what I mean? I'm finally figuring out this life thing. Oh, good. That's what this is.
02:48:17
Speaker
ah Dude, like come on. What else would it be? Come on. and psychotic break. You ever used a greedy yoder and stick? I did when I was a child. I'm sure I tried just about every one not sweat.
02:48:32
Speaker
Yeah. the Antiperspirant doesn't work for me. Right? Yeah, nothing works. I don't have the sweat problem. Right? I don't get... the the shit's here yeah but like when i use antiperspirant like i stink so i have to use deodorant because it's the only thing that works to keep me from stinking yeah like i mean i smell right old spice pure sport fresh right now and it's it's 10 19 p.m eastern standard time you know so i feel pretty good about it is what i'm saying
02:49:11
Speaker
Well, that's good, you know. They do have the antiperspirant deodorant combo. Yeah, but i think I think the keeping me from sweating makes me stink instead. I don't know the science behind it, but that's the that's all I've got. I can't figure anything else out with it.
02:49:27
Speaker
And I don't like stinking. Like, look, I'm already fat, right? So people are going sue me and I'm going stink. Right. And so I take pride in not being a stinky bitch. You know what i mean? Yeah, no, that's good. i'm glad I'm glad that you can You can feel pride in that. That makes me happy.
02:49:44
Speaker
Good. Good. Yeah, see, that's all I'm asking for. it want you to be happy, Blake. Thank you. Mm-hmm.
02:49:55
Speaker
Mm-mm-mm. Hey, I joined WhatNot the other day, and ah they they immediately said it was cool if I wanted to sell shit on WhatNot.
02:50:07
Speaker
So that's wonderful. going to take a bunch of, uh, such comics that he left here. yeah, that went off the wall. That's going to get one, maybe two.
02:50:18
Speaker
Nope. Pretty, pretty, pretty pudge scores on that one. And, uh, Knobloch makes it to, is it, is he on third now? No, no, no. Yeah. Knobloch's on third.
02:50:30
Speaker
Dude, something just flew by my ear, dude. Brother. What was that? Get rid of that thing. They buzzed tower on me, dude. Shit. Negative Ghost Rider, the pattern is full.
02:50:44
Speaker
Playing mind games with me, fucking Gizzle. So yeah, I think i'm gonna I'm gonna sell some shit on Whatnot, dude. Right, yeah, you're selling stuff on Whatnot, gotcha. I think that's what's gonna happen, yeah. Some comic books you told me?
02:50:56
Speaker
Yeah, yeah, yeah, so like I got them here. ah Any erotic ones? I don't know. Oh, look at that.
02:51:08
Speaker
Oh, yeah. Tony Schiavone comic. Mm-hmm. How'd that sell? Hey, man. Thanks for supporting us, dude. um Did you know that I was drawn into this? No.
02:51:19
Speaker
I was. Here I am. Just your copy or everybody's? No, everybody's. Is
02:51:28
Speaker
that you in the back left? Yeah. That's good. That's not unsettling. That's my dipshit ex-best friend who's real piece of shit. Right. Is that Dave Silva?
02:51:39
Speaker
ah No, it's... um Oh, yeah, probably. In the comic, yeah.
02:51:47
Speaker
He's the big fat guy. ah It is...
02:51:53
Speaker
looks like Jackie Fargo. I think it's Wahoo. No, hold on.
02:51:59
Speaker
Who is it? Let's see.
02:52:02
Speaker
Yep, Wahoo McDaniel.
02:52:06
Speaker
I'm glad they got you there with Wahoo. He did break his leg. I did break Wahoo's leg. Wow, look at that. Look at that symmetry. My goodness.
02:52:19
Speaker
You heard him, Donnie.
02:52:23
Speaker
Danny Jackson with some left-on-left action against Kenny Lofton here.
02:52:32
Speaker
Kenny Lofton, definitely not a BMF. No.
02:52:45
Speaker
so
02:52:48
Speaker
Oh, my goodness. Foul that one off of the pizza man's face. Kenny Lofton, ah he had one of those baseball essentials commercials on yeah ESPN all the time, too, didn't he?
02:53:02
Speaker
Or am I making that in head? It's essentials. Like, ah it it was a videotape that came with the... ah Are you talking about Fred McGriff's?
02:53:14
Speaker
Yeah, i think so. Yeah. Tom Amansky. Yeah, Tom Amansky. That's it. Fred McGriff. There we go. Bloop single scores two here.
02:53:28
Speaker
You know, Kenny Lofton's kind of like a miniature version of Fred McGriff. yeah Yeah, like it's he's a more diminutive version of Fred McGriff. And Fred McGriff, I guess, he's not short. He's just tiny little man.
02:53:43
Speaker
Fred McGriff is a massive, massive man. No, he's skinny. Fred McGriff is... um All right.
02:53:56
Speaker
Hold on, I'm looking. I'm looking.
02:54:05
Speaker
All right. Okay. Six foot three, 200 pounds. here's Here's the deal. ah I'm just going to admit it. I mix up the the the the tall black guys constantly.
02:54:18
Speaker
And that just is what it is, right? Kenny Lofton's short as hell.
02:54:30
Speaker
I guess he's six feet tall, but that's not bad. We'll give you a pass on that one. I thought that was going to work out. I thought he was like 5'8".
02:54:43
Speaker
I knew you would have come up with some real positive spin, though.
02:54:54
Speaker
Talking Belvedere.
02:54:59
Speaker
Man, how can y'all be happy listening to this song, too? It's like the best. Straight song, China. Never met her before. Who cares? When you drop, kick your jacket.
02:55:11
Speaker
As you can through the door. No one's glad. But sometimes things get turned around and no one's bad. All hands look out below.
02:55:24
Speaker
There's a change in the status quo. Gonna need all the help that we can get. Can't hear it. You had the goddamn Belvedere fucking theme blasting in my ears.
02:55:39
Speaker
yeah Will Clark hit a fucking single, though. Bloop's single is beautiful. Danny Jackson's getting his ass kicked. Moose Fred McGriff to second. Fuck it.
02:55:52
Speaker
Blake just took off his headphones. Looks like he's walking away. Not sure where he's going. He's bending over in the background. Grabbing something. I think he's grabbing a pillow. Nope.
02:56:03
Speaker
He's got a stool. I'm not sure why. That's interesting. Hey, Ozzy's coming out. What's the stool for there, pal?
02:56:18
Speaker
what's ah What's the stool for there, pal? Man, my mu my legs, my hips are hurting. I'm uncomfortable. I'm just trying to change the angle, dude. I'm real sorry about that, man. Hey, hey here we go. Voodoo Lounge, 1994. It's only rock and roll, but I like it.
02:56:39
Speaker
You know, I think only like two of these guys are dead.
02:56:47
Speaker
Um...
02:56:53
Speaker
Yeah, that that guy is. Mick and Keith are still alive. yeah Yeah.
Philosophical Insights on Happiness
02:57:03
Speaker
That was the joke.
02:57:06
Speaker
Look at that Monte Carlo. Looks like a shirtless man with muscles. This is very erotic.
02:57:16
Speaker
It's the Malibu. You know, dude, those were the best waves that I ever had was in Malibu.
02:57:25
Speaker
i' I've never been surfing.
02:57:29
Speaker
yeah Yeah, you don't say. i mean... Yeah. It seems like you could probably catch a wave pretty tight, dude. I mean, it seems like it everything is is just so much better, though, for those guys that surf. like That might be the secret of life. You know what I mean? like Maybe you could try to glean the cube instead.
02:57:54
Speaker
You know what they say, right? What's that? This O'Neill Highland Open is totally core.
02:58:03
Speaker
What's that? Yeah.
02:58:08
Speaker
If you're having a bad day, catch a wave.
02:58:15
Speaker
Gotcha. I think you said that twice now, right? No, no, no. I think earlier I said that I was I was surfing the giant life wave, man. Uh-huh.
02:58:26
Speaker
You know?
02:58:29
Speaker
No, I probably did repeat myself. I do that a lot. Yeah, no, that's one of the downfalls of positivity. it's Albert Bell.
02:58:45
Speaker
It's a zoo out there.
02:58:50
Speaker
Rod Beck dead. Rod Beck and Albert Bell. Yeah, Rod Beck died relatively recently, no? Yep. think he was living an RV park or something.
02:59:00
Speaker
Until Woodrow told me. You know, I feel like,
02:59:11
Speaker
although it's probably not good to stereotype, you look at a Rod Beck and you think, Maybe this guy's just happier at the trailer court. You know what I mean? Like, maybe that's just what he wants.
02:59:27
Speaker
You know mean? I mean, he wouldn't be there if he didn't. They say you can't judge a book by its cover, but man, with Rod Beck, I think you probably can. He's just an undercover lover.
02:59:55
Speaker
Albert Bell. Boy, oh boy. boy yep force at home. Ozzie substitution gets the ball hit right to him.
03:00:09
Speaker
Viva les expos. Wonderful. You did that perfect. Thanks, man. That was positively perfect.
03:00:22
Speaker
i mean, look, at the end of the day, like, what do you really have to be upset about? You know, you're walking around. You got edibles in the bathroom.
03:00:35
Speaker
Way up high so the kid can't get them, you know? Yeah, no, that's good.
03:00:42
Speaker
Fine. You went to Trader Joe's tonight. You got, like, groceries. I'm going to make chili tomorrow, man. nice. And, like... That should be good for your hemorrhoids.
03:00:55
Speaker
Yeah, I guess I did talk about my hemorrhoids, didn't i Sorry about that, everybody. That was probably pretty gross. Certainly was positive. ah But yeah, I went to the doctor yesterday, the day between the last time we recorded today, and she gave me prescriptions for basically everything I needed, right? Including, guess what?
03:01:17
Speaker
She's referring me to the sleep center to do a sleep study. To get a CPAP machine so that if Blake and I ever sleep in the same room again, guess what?
03:01:29
Speaker
Probably not going to happen. ah ah He won't have to suffer the way he did that first night in St. Louis, huh, buddy? You know, your the earplugs work fine. they just Yeah, that was much easier. you know But did did you say she?
03:01:45
Speaker
Yeah, my primary care physician is Dr. Shana Freeman. So you have a lady put her finger in your butt with your hemorrhoid butt? She hasn't put her finger in my butt yet. but um You don't ever treat your hemorrhoids?
03:02:00
Speaker
No, no, no, no. Not physically. I got cream from her, though. It's in the other room. So she just gave it to you? She didn't say, hey, Gabe, I need to take a look at this.
03:02:11
Speaker
No, no, no. I just told her that I had hemorrhoids. And she's like, that's good enough. I went to unbuckle my belt, but she wasn't having it. You didn't say, no, I'm going to positively make you see these.
03:02:23
Speaker
And then just sat down and squatted on her face. and No, I didn't. Held her down as she cried. you said, look at my asshole, you bitch.
03:02:36
Speaker
Creep me. You know what else I did, too? i yeah I went to the ah the hairdresser and I got just a streak of gray gray hair right down the middle of my head.
03:02:47
Speaker
Like a mohawk. Very Pepe Le Pew.
03:02:52
Speaker
He looks great, though. I hate saying that out loud. He looks so much better than he did three years ago. i mean, I don't know. In these pictures. Yeah, of course. And he's wearing the aviators, right? And he's looking all cool and shit.
03:03:06
Speaker
But, like, his face. Like, I think he got them big fucking cheek things taken out. I think he did. Because he doesn't look like a ventriloquist dummy anymore.
03:03:18
Speaker
Well, you also can't see his eyes. I think that does a lot. is i mean Well, I suppose you learn a
Celebrity Reminiscing and Humor
03:03:26
Speaker
lot about the eyes. this is bru That was Bruce Willis dressed up like the Easter Bunny.
03:03:31
Speaker
Yeah, this is North. Oh, that's that we we saw this last time. You know what? I forgot because I was in such a depressed mood. That's what it is. It wasn't the weed that made me forget.
03:03:42
Speaker
Sometimes you forget things. Maybe yes, maybe I don't know. that's maybe yes maybe no i don't know Sometimes you repeat things. Maybe I do. Maybe I don't.
03:03:53
Speaker
Up is down. Down is up. North is west. You don't spend as much time in the Barrio as I did without picking up something. Arriba! American League here in the top of the 7th.
03:04:08
Speaker
We're heading to the bottom now. What an all-star game. Who's that dipshit? It's Johnny Bench. Oh. you never watch the baseball bunch with Johnny Bench?
03:04:20
Speaker
He was in profile. I just didn't see him head on. I would have known it was Johnny Bench if I was looking at his face. I used to love watching the fucking baseball bunch after school on ESPN.
03:04:32
Speaker
Gabe, you look like Antifa with that hat on. i am i am quite anti-fascist. So thank you, Blake. That makes me really happy. kids Hang loose.
03:04:45
Speaker
Brother?
03:04:52
Speaker
Pat Hentgen in the game. Pat who now? Hentgen. Hentgen? Is it not Hentgen? Pat Hentgen.
03:05:03
Speaker
Who cares? I feel like he might have been like the 92 Cy Young or something like that. little bloop single there into right field. Was that Biggio or That's Bagwell.
03:05:17
Speaker
ah and Those beautiful jerseys.
03:05:22
Speaker
The more I look at them, the more I like them. I just don't remember them.
03:05:28
Speaker
Yeah, they only had them for and
03:05:35
Speaker
six years, maybe. Something that. Well, all right.
03:05:46
Speaker
It's one thing to be good. This guy's hair's got problems. His name is Wolfredo.
03:05:57
Speaker
I don't like it.
03:06:00
Speaker
Does his sexuality make you uncomfortable? It could be. ah you know. the Now there's shit that I almost said that I shouldn't say. Yeah.
03:06:12
Speaker
like No, just... We're staying positive, brother. His raw sex appeal of Wilfredo Cordero. You can't argue that he is not sex.
03:06:24
Speaker
Well, I'm glad you brought that up, Blake.
03:06:28
Speaker
Benito? It is i Benito Santiago. Godfather of Wilfredo Cordero. You don't find usually a godfather and a godson playing in the league together.
03:06:45
Speaker
Well, you understand. I have friends, and his father had friends. and Right. I've just been looking out for him sort of from the sidelines within the league here. and Oh, every third Thursday, he'll come down to the compound in Miami, and he'll take the West Wing, if you understand my meaning. I do, yes.
03:07:08
Speaker
Holla, holla.
03:07:13
Speaker
Oh, it's far more than $5, Blake. I can guarantee you that. The whores that i have sent in, nothing but top dollar sort of stuff.
03:07:24
Speaker
You get it.
03:07:27
Speaker
What an ass-eating, I imagine. I love of having my ass-eating. Thank you for talking about that.
03:07:38
Speaker
Ripken with the The unassisted. He wanted out of that inning because he knew i was waiting downstairs with a fine, yeah lovely, a lovely young lady.
03:07:51
Speaker
she She wrote his name across her chest, do you understand? Oh, with what?
03:07:58
Speaker
Lipstick, Blake. It was beautiful. yeah And when I say lipstick, I mean my dog's penis. Oh, no. That's gross.
03:08:14
Speaker
Alright, bye bye. Thanks.
03:08:19
Speaker
My goodness, it's been a long so long time since we've heard from that guy. What the hell has he been doing? Fucking whores, I would imagine. don't think anybody wants to know what Elderly Benito has been doing.
03:08:34
Speaker
Nothing legal. why Why was it that the word elderly is what popped me on that? yeah Well, Even when he was younger, he still looked fucking old. He did look old. He did. There's no doubt.
03:08:52
Speaker
Man, I'd pop this motherfucker up in the bed and just lay down if I wasn't afraid to move this goddamn microphone again.
03:09:03
Speaker
What Blake is saying is this is a long game and he's getting tired. been a long day for him. I think he's been up since probably 5 a.m. m Eh, no. I tried to get up earlier and I couldn't do it.
03:09:16
Speaker
I snoozed for a solid hour. I'm having a hard time getting up in the morning now. Yeah, i just about every day I am. Except for today, man. I just made a decision. Sure, yeah. No, you made that call, right?
03:09:28
Speaker
I gotcha. Yep.
03:09:32
Speaker
I think I'd be fine if my legs weren't bothering me. It's just very uncomfortable.
03:09:38
Speaker
I think I might masturbate and see if that helps. It will. It's going to jerk off in this trash can and blow me while all this angel's in the outfield commercial place. That's fine.
03:09:49
Speaker
See if I can finish before it's over. Yeah.
03:09:53
Speaker
Christopher Lloyd's. Mm-hmm. That's some cutting-edge shit, man.
03:10:01
Speaker
Oh.
03:10:03
Speaker
I saw this in the theater. Did you? Yes, I did. Yep.
03:10:14
Speaker
I forgot Matthew McConaughey was in it. Yep. Literally watched this maybe like a year ago.
Excitement for Baseball and Legends
03:10:32
Speaker
but Tony Danza.
03:10:41
Speaker
Just an absolute all-star cast. What a move by Disney, too. Buy the Angels and then make a goddamn movie about them.
03:10:52
Speaker
Yeah. Baseball Night in America. Look at that. hey Thank you, Kirby. Jack that value up and then sell the motherfuckers.
03:11:03
Speaker
Why don't you tell me? I just did.
03:11:09
Speaker
Yeah, but that's... I mean, you understand.
03:11:14
Speaker
I like to pride myself on understanding, but I gotta tell you the truth. There's been a lot about this fucking half-ass show that I don't understand shit about. I guess it's because I'm not very positive, though. Uh-oh.
03:11:28
Speaker
My goodness.
03:11:32
Speaker
It's safe to say the Stars have come out tonight, isn't it? It really is. He stays at second there. Ripken. He's got double to lead off the seventh inning here.
03:11:42
Speaker
Eighth. It's the goddamn eighth inning, and he's still in there.
03:11:49
Speaker
You know what? I think some of these guys like playing baseball. Well, probably especially against the other best players in the, like, that's probably a lot of it. It's a mentality thing, right? if you're If you have the opportunity to prove yourself against the other people that are best,
03:12:10
Speaker
and you have that mentality that we talked about with Jordan, then that's what they're going to want to do. It's why Barry Bonds is out there trying to blast home runs so the fans can stick it up their ass.
03:12:25
Speaker
Yeah, I don't think he won't. Yeah, well, maybe. But the, ah you know, like it's just so less, I don't know what kind of number you put on it, but yeah There's a handful of guys that still have that kind of stuff today, but it's like the exception vastly. Sure, yeah.
03:12:47
Speaker
You can tell because you know and you know whatever, right, wrong, or indifferent, but they they all just assume they all get their piece of the pie and play the fucking game and that's it. They don't really give a shit about beating the other guy or not.
03:13:06
Speaker
Which I suppose from a human perspective is a better mentality, but I don't know. It doesn't make for much more of an exciting game, I'll tell you that. but
03:13:18
Speaker
Just a bit outside, says
03:13:23
Speaker
Bob Costas. My dick.
03:13:34
Speaker
Rod Beck. What a man.
03:13:38
Speaker
Who do you think he voted for? Dukakis. Let me ask you this. Please.
03:13:48
Speaker
Rod Beck pulls his pants down and is ah shaved vagina. Huh. Yeah. What do you do? I go eat her ass.
03:14:05
Speaker
Goatee turns rack looking back at you.
03:14:10
Speaker
Compartmentalization, my friend. hell boy, that's a big compartment. yeah That's what she said. so he said. What do have in your mouth? What what what are you doing?
03:14:26
Speaker
Is that a chip clip? It sure is. Gabe is practicing sadomasochism on the whole ballgame.
03:14:35
Speaker
He's one step away from putting that thing on his nipples. Oh, God, don't do that. There it is. Jesus Christ, he's done it.
03:14:46
Speaker
It looks just awful. That had to hurt. It didn't, actually. i thought it was going to hurt real bad. It didn't.
03:14:57
Speaker
Apparently, I don't have very sensitive nipples. That's information for all of you in the whole ballgame universe.
03:15:07
Speaker
I figured Rick would be crying like a baby though. yeah Yeah. Yeah. Well, I'm glad you brought that up, Blake. You know, it's been a long time since we talked and, and I moved out about two and a half weeks ago. Oh, but I visited on, on the occasion.
03:15:26
Speaker
I was glad he, he got here tonight a little later than I expected. And he, uh, he had some bags to take up into the house. So I offered to help and, I grabbed and damn thing ripped and it just fell.
03:15:37
Speaker
You know the can of tomato paste Gabe was going to use for his chili rolled all the way down the driveway to the road. Oh my goodness. It was embarrassing for him. What a comedy airs.
03:15:49
Speaker
It was really something. Did you help him? Oh, course I did.
03:15:57
Speaker
are you going to help me make the chili? Oh no, I'm not much of a cook myself. Uh... Steven takes care of that for us, you know. Yeah. he He orders, you know, the HelloFresh.
03:16:11
Speaker
He orders the HelloFresh. I moved in with Steve. That's why I moved out. You understand? Uh-huh. All right. Gabe's selling this place. Yeah. You got people coming in here and walking around when they're not home, and so he didn't want me under the couch, you know Sure. Yeah.
03:16:27
Speaker
so So I moved in with Steven. Steven gets the ready-to-prepare meals, you know. He made me this thing the other night where he just takes a chicken breast, right, and he dips the whole thing in in in mayonnaise,
03:16:44
Speaker
the top of the thing in mayonnaise, and then they give you a bunch of, like, crumblies or what have you, and you put the crumblies on top of the mayonnaise, and then you put the whole thing in the oven, and it's like a fake...
03:16:57
Speaker
fried chicken patty, but it's grilled chicken just with crumblies on it. You know, and they use the fat to bind the crumblies to the top of the chicken. What exactly is a crumbly?
03:17:09
Speaker
What's a crumbly? You mean like bread crumbs?
03:17:17
Speaker
I think that was Wesley's last name. ah
03:17:23
Speaker
hu Who's Harry Crumbly? No, it's pretty good. And then, uh, you know, came with a couple of carrots. And so he, he chopped those up, you know, on the dais.
03:17:35
Speaker
And so they were like diagonally cut and he, he, he, he oven roasted them with garlic. And then, ah he, he, uh, uh, Did the thing with the the skin of the lemon on top of it. Zest.
03:17:49
Speaker
He zested it and mixed it all together. Like the soap? Man, man. I don't even care. I don't even care much for carrots, but I'll eat the shit out of them things. Them are real good, you know? You're not fully clean.
03:18:01
Speaker
They didn't even have to go in old Stephen's orifice before I ate it either. i enjoyed it quite a bit, even without his stink on it, you know?
03:18:13
Speaker
Ass carrots. that what you're talking about?
03:18:17
Speaker
Yeah, yeah, that's what I mean.
03:18:22
Speaker
Anyway, I hope I was able to add a little something to the program. I'm so happy to be here. Yeah, you're always happy to be here, and thanks.
03:18:34
Speaker
Thanks, Hey, it looks like Shohei Uhtani hit three home runs tonight.
Celebrating Shohei Ohtani and Personal Struggles
03:18:39
Speaker
Three, wow. he did I got a little notification theyre on my cell phone, you know,
03:18:46
Speaker
ah that ah he let off the game with a home run tonight. And that's the first time pitcher has ever let off with a home run.
03:18:57
Speaker
Well, what a magical world we're living in, huh? I mean, geez, I thought baseball used to be better. But if you haven't watched Shohei Otani, he'll change your mind.
03:19:09
Speaker
I do got to say, though, Gafin's so positive lately, and it's rubbing off on me, if I'm being honest with Oh, well, that's good. I'm sure Steven appreciates that. Well... See, Steven... Hey, Rick, while we're at commercial and you're talking about Steven, I'm going to go piss, so keep talking about Steven and hopefully you'll be done when I get back, okay?
03:19:36
Speaker
I fucking hate Steven.
03:19:41
Speaker
like
03:19:43
Speaker
Almost as much as i hate positive gay.
03:19:50
Speaker
He loves me is what he was saying. ah and he loves Rick. He really, really does.
03:19:59
Speaker
See, what Blake doesn't understand is that all of this is an act. It's a way for me to to put on display what it is that we do every single day to show the world that we're in a really good and happy place when in reality we're not.
03:20:21
Speaker
So there's that.
03:20:53
Speaker
On to the bottom of the eighth here. It's 7-5.
03:20:58
Speaker
Cal Ripken's still in the game, by the way.
03:21:03
Speaker
My goodness. Uh-oh. Who's that?
03:21:08
Speaker
It looks like we got a cameo here on the podcast, everybody. Am I on-on? Oh, yeah. You're totally on. Absolutely. Well, let me fix my hair. ah we don't We don't do that. We just look at each other. husband's choosing to do this podcast instead of have sex with me.
03:21:25
Speaker
Just so we're all on the same page. I hope your fans are happy. i They're incredibly happy now. i can All six of them are jerking off. Oh, I'm in trouble.
03:22:02
Speaker
Do we want to talk about that or are we just going to go forward?
03:22:08
Speaker
No. You can just cut it out.
03:22:13
Speaker
If you've ever done anything for me.
03:22:19
Speaker
Kenny Lofton loses his hat. I just, i I ask myself, like,
03:22:27
Speaker
I feel like I portray a pretty straightforward, like, whatever and then is what i sometimes i I wonder how things happen the where it's like what about me ever said like I would think this was fine
03:22:49
Speaker
but here we are that's what I get for pissing well yeah the odd thing to me was just like
03:23:05
Speaker
I believe she probably assumed that when one of us leaves, we stop recording.
03:23:14
Speaker
My guess.
03:23:22
Speaker
It's fine. No, I wish I had a chip clip of myself right now. I'd put it on my penis head and just bleed to death slowly.
03:23:35
Speaker
You see, because i I take the blood thinners, I would bleed to death quickly.
03:23:48
Speaker
Diet Coke commercial, baby. oh yeah, look at that.
03:23:54
Speaker
This poor son of a bitch eats the same thing for lunch every day, though.
03:24:01
Speaker
and I know some people like that.
03:24:06
Speaker
The new Diet Coke can, Blake.
03:24:11
Speaker
Trying to think about what it looked like before that. Much different.
03:24:25
Speaker
I let everybody in on the gag ah while you were gone, by the way. What's that? Oh, no, no, not I can't let you in on it. The positivity thing, like what what what that's about. oh You understand what it's about. Now everybody understands what it's about.
03:24:41
Speaker
Although if they're listening, they should have understood already.
03:24:46
Speaker
Thank you for that. Yes. Thank you, Blake, for choosing the whole ballgame over sex. I've only done it for two and a half years.
03:25:01
Speaker
Oh, is that what was said? oh i got you now. ah huh i I wasn't aware that that... hi and This lady takes like 55% truths and and makes them absolutes. like This wasn't even a question or discussion or anything. had an idea.
03:25:27
Speaker
This was said and this was said and then Now it's the truth. They're married to a fucking worker, dude.
03:25:38
Speaker
Star of a soft porn movie, apparently.
03:25:44
Speaker
What's going on with this, dude? Somebody writing the news tonight's hard up for so or so for some reason. Where is this at? Delaware? Coverage you can count on. Philadelphia.
03:25:57
Speaker
Oh, Kato. Yeah, Kato Kalen. Oh, that's right. Yep. Not Kato doing soft pornography. Well, then, he's Tanaka.
03:26:10
Speaker
Mr. McMahon, are you aware that Kato is engaged in pornographic behaviors? a As a matter of fact, I encourage it.
03:26:24
Speaker
is it Is it with Fuji?
03:26:28
Speaker
Oh, my Yokozuma. Ah, yes. Ah, my Yokozuma. See, so much better. Jesus Christ. It's all about you make the Yokozuma.
03:26:43
Speaker
You got to get an M in there. know boy how about Roberto Clemente? How about about dying like that?
03:26:56
Speaker
You think he was feeling positive on the way down? Well, look, man, when you're face-to-face with death, I think it's the the last time you get the opportunity to look within yourself and really get an understanding of just what you're made of. You know what I mean, man?
03:27:17
Speaker
So, you know, i got to imagine it it was scary, sure, but, like, when you're an athlete, the caliber of a Roberto Alomar,
03:27:29
Speaker
and ah i think I got his name wrong maybe, but it's fine. You understand.
03:27:40
Speaker
No, I don't. No, not at all. Like, the fuck are you people doing to me? Jesus Christ, look at this vest he's wearing.
03:27:52
Speaker
He's got that button buttoned up.
03:27:57
Speaker
I'm glad you brought that up, Blake. I went and changed my clothes because I had a flight straight from Pittsburgh to Orlando.
03:28:08
Speaker
And I dress up for my flights, being a first-class passenger and all. I'm meeting my dad, Tony, at the Magic Kingdom tomorrow at 8 a.m. Whether we win or lose, I'll see you there.
Disney Myths and Controversial Cases
03:28:24
Speaker
Are you staying at the Continental?
03:28:28
Speaker
I believe you're talking about the
03:28:44
Speaker
the... I think your programming is defaulting KG24. Your smoke is coming out of your ears. your your Your eyes are just spitting like slot machines.
03:28:58
Speaker
There are no deaths on Disney properties, Blake. ah There are no deaths on Disney properties. There are no deaths on Disney properties, Blake. There are no deaths on Disney property.
03:29:10
Speaker
I know, they don't stop. Jesus Christ, how many guys have lost their bat tonight?
03:29:27
Speaker
Wow.
03:29:34
Speaker
ah thought I thought it was broken at first. Now you just lost the whole damn bat.
03:29:40
Speaker
He needs some stick. um
03:29:44
Speaker
By the way, the hotel is called the Contemporary. No, it's called the Cotton Ittle.
03:29:54
Speaker
Craig Bezio decided not to throw to first there, Blake. I'm disappointed in his decision.
03:30:03
Speaker
Yeah, well, I'm disappointed in you. I thought you was a man and then you just a robot.
03:30:12
Speaker
Is that my friend, Charlie Huff? I'd recognize that gritty, growly voice of his anywhere. I'm only friends with humans and animals.
03:30:25
Speaker
Like my me amigo. Fernando Valencia.
03:30:38
Speaker
Uh-oh.
03:30:42
Speaker
Hey, almost saw that one in the lights.
03:30:47
Speaker
Well, i had just finished a nice turkey turkey sandwich with American cheese and mayonnaise. That was my best attempt.
03:30:58
Speaker
No, you need to stick to Snaggapus.
03:31:03
Speaker
i'll I'll take care of the turkey sandwiches and the Evian game. Don't worry about it. You stick cartoony. Heavens to Murgatroyd. There it is. Heavens to Murgatroyd, indeed. We'll get there together, pal.
03:31:15
Speaker
I forgot that my voice sounded like this. Hmm.
03:31:22
Speaker
The OJ Media Circus has glued the world to their TVs. guess those guys that killed their parents.
03:31:31
Speaker
The Menendez brothers? Is that what we're thinking of, Blake? Charlie?
03:31:39
Speaker
That's I said. They killed their parents. You ever kill a parent? Well, see, let me ask you this. You know, some new stuff has come to light recently with the Menendez boys and them what their is what their and what they're what they're what they went through as kids.
03:31:56
Speaker
You know, the abuse of their father and that sort of thing. I thought that was there' known. There's some wondering if, yeah, but now the they have the documentary and a whole nother ah generation of people have learned about it and that shit.
03:32:12
Speaker
um Do you think that that that sort of treatment over that long a period of time justifies that sort of response?
03:32:25
Speaker
What response? Murder. Oh, gotcha. ah Yeah, I mean, I thought we we had all agreed that we were fine looking the other way on it, but I thought they went to jail too, right?
03:32:39
Speaker
Yeah. Man, that's making me really fucking hungry for a rotisserie chicken. that Boston? Is that a Boston? No. It's Colonel Sanders one. Ooh. I didn't, man, I didn't even remember that they had them until now.
03:32:53
Speaker
I bet we got them a lot. My mom loved that shit. Like when there was a, in town, like, like the, the VFW, not the VFW, the American Legion would do fundraisers and they'd bring in a port-a-pit.
03:33:08
Speaker
And it would be like ah you get a a half chicken for like $5.99 or a whole chicken for $10.99 outside the American Legion. My mom loved port-a-pit chicken. And that's what it looked like.
03:33:22
Speaker
You ever had a port-a-pit? No, no. It sounds a lot like port-a-potty and it drives me away from it. Yeah, I understand. Seems like a weird thing to name your food. Yeah, so basically it's just a barbecue pit.
03:33:36
Speaker
That they roll around. It's like mobile. And so they do barbecued chickens. You know, like long time in the smoker, that sort of thing. So basically a grill on wheels.
03:33:49
Speaker
Yeah, but not like a grill, like ah like one of those heavy duty, like low and slow, like smoker deals. you know? Right. But yes, exactly. Yes.
03:34:03
Speaker
Ooh, he had the bug eyes. I didn't like it. Well, look, it's the bottom of the ninth, and they're just going to try to win this ballgame. I feel negative about it. Uh-oh. Is the tide turning, brother?
03:34:16
Speaker
Dude, no. I'm a happy guy. Are we moving into 97? um ah I'm a happy guy. i don't... This isn't... It's not going to move that quickly, man. Well,
03:34:32
Speaker
I'll see what I can do.
03:34:40
Speaker
Wipeout. I thought that was Hump for a minute.
03:34:51
Speaker
Who's that? Somebody say my name.
03:34:57
Speaker
Only on the whole ballgame. we get Have you seen my testicles lately? Not lately, no. You won. No.
03:35:07
Speaker
I don't think so. Not after I saw them slightly than recently.
03:35:15
Speaker
why Why you making clown music? Oh, you're so silly. Don't talk to me like that. Just lick my asshole and move on. I don't think you have an answer. That's why you say that.
03:35:28
Speaker
What are you talking about? I don't have an answer to that. It's very clear what I'm talking about. You didn't ask me a question. I said, why do you make clown music? What? I don't make clown music. i don't I don't play an instrument. How can I make music with it? After you talk, you make clown music with your mouth.
03:35:46
Speaker
I've got sticky stuff on the underside of the shaft of my penis. Yeah, that's it right there. It stinks too. He he he he he. it stinks too
03:36:01
Speaker
yes Ooh, 87 miles per hour. That's a fast one. Not as fast me, though. Kiss my ass. Bye-bye.
03:36:15
Speaker
That's actually pretty slow.
03:36:19
Speaker
Cornette was talking about our guy the other day on the podcast and had nothing but great things to say about him. Who's our guy? And all of you, um...
03:36:31
Speaker
Oh. All I could think was him running around ringside trying to get the free birds to eat his asshole.
03:36:46
Speaker
Or maybe the wild Samoans after Amy left. Oh, God. Not the wild, the the is yeah the Samoan SWAT team. Yeah, that says T.
03:37:22
Speaker
oh my goodness
03:37:25
Speaker
Yeah, he's not putting on much of a ah show out there, is he?
03:37:31
Speaker
Eh, you know, he's past his prime.
03:37:41
Speaker
Hey, there's the diminutive Fred McGriff. Okay. okay
03:37:48
Speaker
Yeah, I think I admit it, right? Yeah, i just I just have a problem telling them apart a lot of the time. A small crime dog, as he's known. Real problem. No, you're good, man. There's one thing you do. and It's your forthright and with your honesty of your shortcomings and mistakes.
03:38:09
Speaker
Look, man, the way I figure it, dude, ah we all just got to be sort of like Statler and Waldorf in this life. You know what I mean? We're beacons of positivity. We just sit back and enjoy the show, you know?
03:38:24
Speaker
I feel like they're pretty negative, though. I don't think that's true at all. like Those guys are at every show. And every single time, they're there supporting their guys.
03:38:36
Speaker
Are they?
03:38:39
Speaker
Yeah. Haven't you ever watched the Muppets? Well, yeah. They just sit there and they kind of razz them. No, they're there every time, man. They're there. It's a fucking razzum. I know it.
03:38:50
Speaker
Talking on camera. Talking shit. they're They're really, really honest and great human beings. and you know It's why I have a poster of them above my workstation here. It's because like I got to remember that there are two folks in my corner at all times, even if they are made of of foam and and and felt.
03:39:17
Speaker
It reminds you that you're a man-child at all times is what it does.
03:39:24
Speaker
Who asked you, man? I guess you, because there's only two of us. Well, as two or 12, depending on however you count these beings inside of us. but Let me ask you this.
03:39:38
Speaker
Yes. Have you ever found yourself wondering if the happiness you see in others is genuine? I know I have. Yes, yes. it's It's easy to get caught up in a world that seems obsessed with projecting an image of constant joy and contentment.
03:39:56
Speaker
But what if this fake happiness is more prevalent than we think? The concept of fake happiness refers to the facade many people put on to appear happy.
03:40:08
Speaker
even when they might be struggling internally. In to- today's digital age, social media platforms play a significant role in perpetuating that phenomenon. We're bombarded and carefully with carefully curated posts showcasing picture-perfect lives, exotic vacations, and seemingly endless achievements.
03:40:28
Speaker
While it's natural to want to present our best selves to the world, constantly striving for this idealized version of happiness can be detrimental to our well-being. The pressure to maintain appearances can lead us down a path of comparison and self-doubt. It becomes essential for us to question whether we're truly experiencing authentic happiness or merely chasing an illusion.
Joy, Happiness, and Social Media Perceptions
03:40:54
Speaker
When it comes to happiness, we often find ourselves chasing an elusive dream, Blake. The illusion of happiness is a concept that many people can relate to as it involves the pursuit of a state of contentment that may not actually be genuine or sustainable.
03:41:12
Speaker
what Let's you and I delve deeper into this notion and explore some examples that highlight the complexities surrounding fake happiness. Uh-huh.
03:41:23
Speaker
Toxic positivity, contributing to the illusion of happiness, is the pressure to always appear positive and optimistic regardless of one's actual emotional state.
03:41:36
Speaker
Society encourage us to plaster smiles on our faces, go surfing, even when dealing with difficult circumstances such as grief or heartbreak or failure.
03:41:48
Speaker
Suppressing negative emotions under the guise of staying positive. can lead to emotional suppression and an inability to address underlying issues effectively.
03:42:08
Speaker
Safe at first there. They missed the double play. Was that it? Did it just Was that the end of your speech? your speech Superficial relationships, man.
03:42:22
Speaker
Maintaining superficial connections in an attempt to fit societal expectations can also contribute to the illusion of happiness, surrounding ourselves with people who don't truly understand or support us.
03:42:37
Speaker
can can lead to to to us feeling lonely and disconnected despite having a large social circle. True happiness stems from nurturing authentic relationships built on trust, empathy, and mutual understanding like ours, man.
03:42:53
Speaker
It's important to recognize that true happiness cannot be found by chasing external validations or pretending to be happy when we're not. Embracing authenticity, cultivating meaningful relationships, prioritizing personal growth.
03:43:07
Speaker
And finding joy in simple pleasures are some of the ways we can break free from the illusion of happiness and discover genuine fulfillment in our lives.
03:43:26
Speaker
For Gokusi's got his man.
03:44:01
Speaker
You ever seen a guy coming from the beach with a surfboard under his arm? With a big frown on his face? No, I haven't. Exactly. They're all smiling, man.
03:44:13
Speaker
How can you be unhappy in a world where surfing is a way of life? I don't go to the beach. Just a beautiful thing. Never seen anybody on a beach. Well, that's not true, but definitely not surfer.
03:44:30
Speaker
Man, you're just not looking hard enough, dude. I don't want to be there, so I'm pretty happy about it. So I've succeeded. I'm happy. What's not to like about the ocean, man? it's just You could drown in there Realizing you're one with the earth. I don't want to be one with it.
03:44:51
Speaker
You have access to to see such beauty, man. Ocean will kill you. Yeah, but it's beautiful.
03:45:02
Speaker
I guess if you want to die. Well, I don't understand what you mean. that Those two things aren't connected. Uh-oh, he's right. Oh, that's gone. That's a two-run home run. dog Fred McGriff just ties the game in the top of the ninth inning, bottom of the ninth inning.
1994 Baseball Reflections and Human Instincts
03:45:22
Speaker
Yep.
03:45:25
Speaker
Jim Leland's happy about it. The Pittsburgh Faithful are happy about it. God, you got to be going crazy, man, if you're there and that happens. Yep. Lee Smith, not so happy about it.
03:45:37
Speaker
The hometown National League team.
03:45:41
Speaker
Back when you cared who fucking won.
03:45:45
Speaker
I was always rooting for National League. I was in NL town.
03:45:55
Speaker
Yeah, those Cardinals, they carried a lot of water for the Midwest, didn't they? I suppose by this time, this would have been the first year I was in fucking... ah Royals?
03:46:06
Speaker
Yeah. Well, I might have been there for 93, but I don't know. We just moved right around the 93 All-Star game.
03:46:19
Speaker
Oh,
03:46:25
Speaker
oh my goodness. Bagwell in now. But I'll say, ah you know, this is is the best All-Star game ever, I think.
03:46:37
Speaker
Well, there's no... ah
03:46:41
Speaker
There's no question it's... ah It's a good story, right? Like, you look back at the story of 1994 like we have, and you see it just, like, for what it was from above...
03:47:00
Speaker
watching the timeline progress, it's hard to come up with any other solution other than the one that we've come up with in a sort of tongue-in-cheek way, I suppose. But but truly, like, it...
03:47:20
Speaker
There are these times that that that come through, and we're probably only privy to a couple of them, but, like,
03:47:34
Speaker
1994, man. I'm high. Sorry. Oh, okay. How are you? Yeah. Yeah. That's fine. But but no, ah the the the way the world came together, like it's so... Here's my point.
03:47:49
Speaker
I think, Blake, that you might be some sort of oh superhero is strong. but have some super sort of connection with with with reality as a whole.
03:48:07
Speaker
Like at some point in your life, you you you could see everything that has happened and the reasons for it all. And some of that shit is left in your brain in this lifetime.
03:48:21
Speaker
ah And you share these little things, these little thoughts from time to time that in the moment, I'll go ah Blake's being Blake again. Sure. Yeah.
03:48:32
Speaker
Yeah. And then they wiggle around in your brain and you start seeing exactly what Blake was talking about out there in the real world. And you go that son of a bitch, that son of a, that son of a bitch.
03:48:51
Speaker
It makes, I'm not normal, but I think I'm more normal than you in terms of the way that my brain works. Probably. But like so the idea that you have just a half of a ah tick to the left or right as you look at things and it opens up your eyes.
03:49:16
Speaker
It's just you understand what I'm saying, right? Like there's just this small difference in the way that you look at the world and you you notice.
03:49:29
Speaker
the things that other people don't. I have some of that. I recognize a face when it's a problem. Like there's a, a level of being in tune, but you're 300 levels up from where I am. And, and coming to that reality,
03:49:48
Speaker
part of the whole positivity thing tonight, understanding that, that like,
03:49:57
Speaker
you can choose to to to look at it your way and be miserable, or you can choose to close your eyes and be really happy and just go surfing, bro. Yeah. You know, and I never thought of it like that, but it's hard to argue with any of that. You're right.
03:50:13
Speaker
Absolutely. And it's, it's quite frankly, it's way past time that somebody come to notice that. So thank you. I'm glad I could help you out.
03:50:25
Speaker
Let's inspire a generation.
03:50:31
Speaker
For our next whole ballgame Patreon exclusive series, we'll be watching the entire Martin Short Show series.
03:50:40
Speaker
We're really going to crack open the mind of the human beings.
03:50:46
Speaker
Jesus Christ. Scoop it into the pan like an egg yolk.
03:50:55
Speaker
Oh, poor Lee Smith. Did you see the thing where theyre yeah the AI, now they're going to start off offering erotica on the open AI? Oh, are they? For adults, yeah. Fantastic news.
03:51:08
Speaker
Yeah, turns out it's just kind of like, a you know, people are just going to be fucking in an alternate reality with... This is this is going to destroy humanity. There's going to be a, a you know, a weighted...
03:51:26
Speaker
piece of equipment that you put on your lap as a man. And it has
03:51:37
Speaker
maybe not visually similar, but certainly internally similar parts and places for your appendages to go. that will move and react in time to either AI or the videos that you're watching. one of those needle things you put on your face. 100%. Absolutely correct.
03:51:57
Speaker
Exactly. hundred Hundreds of points of contact, potentially. Yeah. 17 points of articulation. Correct. That's right. It's disgusting. It's gross. um But, you know, I'm i'm um into it. Let's go.
03:52:12
Speaker
Nobody's going to choose the pain in the ass that is another human being over the convenience and the ease of this shit. Or we've talked about the sex robot thing before. You're dead on accurate. A hundred percent. hey like Beautiful.
03:52:26
Speaker
If I can spend 10 grand on this thing, that's guaranteed to last me 20 years or whatever. Right. Uh, and, and if something goes wrong with it, you just swap it out with another one.
03:52:39
Speaker
um
03:52:42
Speaker
Why would anyone bother with... it's it's a It's a difficult conclusion to come up with.
03:52:55
Speaker
It's an easy answer, right? oh because you got to stick around. you True, meaningful connection. We were just talking about it, right? Uh-huh. Problem is, you're forgetting rule number one of everything.
03:53:11
Speaker
What's rule number one of everything, Blake? Oh, I mean, my mind went to like... What's it about? What's it all about? It's about coming. Like, we're going we're going to do whatever's easiest is is where I was going to go. like it you you It's the same thing. Yeah, yeah. because It's the same thing.
03:53:32
Speaker
It's primal, you know? Like, we're not going to do that because that's... now Why would you do that when you can do this and it's better and easier and everything?
03:53:45
Speaker
Like, there's not... People aren't going to be able to come up with a reason for it. And so they won't. Maybe chicks, I don't know. But who the fuck knows?
03:54:00
Speaker
they've had They've had great dildos and vibrators forever and they're still marrying dudes, so...
03:54:10
Speaker
I was reading about the Mamba vibe and whatever, Magnum, whatever the fuck it was called. Yeah, some kind of goddamn fucking synthetic axis or some shit. It was talking about shape-shifting stuff. It was wild.
03:54:27
Speaker
Absolute insanity. i mean, yeah. The problem... The problem me is gonna be that you're gonna be able to fucking just...
03:54:40
Speaker
voice command, like, you're going to be able to, like, create a scenario where you're fucking anybody you want to be, and you'll you're seeing it, like, and on your headset or whatever the fuck you got on, you know? Like, how do you compete with that?
03:55:01
Speaker
Be kind of difficult to compete.
03:55:08
Speaker
John 3-3 sign in the stands. Don't believe that's Roland Stewart. think he's locked up at this point or dead or whatever. he ever die? Did they kill him? I don't remember.
03:55:24
Speaker
Probably. Who gives a shit?
03:55:32
Speaker
Ripken is still in there, by the way. Yeah, right? Yeah.
03:55:39
Speaker
People do love Cal Ripken.
03:55:43
Speaker
It's hard to, you know, dislike a guy that shows up every day, right?
03:55:51
Speaker
Although I do dislike plenty of guys that show up every day, so don't listen to me.
03:55:59
Speaker
I'm full of fucking shit. I'm just a bitch.
03:56:03
Speaker
That's not true. Don't say things like that about yourself. yeah Well, you know, we're all bitches.
03:56:11
Speaker
Alright, I'll take that. That's I can still be a better bitch than the rest of the bitches. That's good point. We're still all bitches.
03:56:23
Speaker
Puerto Rico. Vega Baja, Puerto Rico. oh you want a fun Travis Fryman story? I do. Please, regale us. As Travis Fryman's on deck warming up, um I, in sixth grade, uh-oh,
03:56:42
Speaker
They sit Sierra at second, Pudge at first. But I don't know what the hell we were doing. I think it was for English class, practicing writing letters or something.
03:56:53
Speaker
But I thought I had somebody at home invasion behind me for a second. Saw a shadow. a Because you're not fucking watching me. You got to watch my back, dude. See his darkness.
03:57:06
Speaker
Anyway. um But I wrote a letter and I'm like, you know, I'm going to pick out a A player that's decent and good, but maybe not like, you know, not like fucking Dave Justice or Cal Ripken or Junior. Somebody that I'd have no chance in hell of getting one back from.
03:57:28
Speaker
And I never got anything.
03:57:32
Speaker
I sent a letter and a card, asked for an autograph.
03:57:37
Speaker
Sent the self-addressed stamp thing back and in that fucking... cock sucking piece of shit, didn't sign it and send it back to me. So you can fuck yourself, Travis, you stupid bitch. Travis Fryman couldn't do that for you?
03:57:51
Speaker
What a piece of shit. He's got a small penis.
03:57:59
Speaker
Uh oh.
03:58:04
Speaker
Tony's still in the game.
03:58:13
Speaker
What are you doing? Gambling? What does that say? I can't read It's your wife. Oh. What does it say?
03:58:26
Speaker
Sorry I miss any of and made. Oh. That's funny.
03:58:37
Speaker
Knoblock 0 for 2 on the night.
03:58:43
Speaker
Boy, oh boy. He's a sawed-off human being, isn't he? What a strange amount of proportion this man has. Yeah, you know. Chuck Mablock. I think he... Chuck has some problems.
03:58:57
Speaker
That face is a problem. It is, right?
03:59:03
Speaker
My goodness. bet he knows a lot about cars.
03:59:09
Speaker
Well, I'll tell you. In my time, with the Phillies working with him. ah I did have a, you know, I had an 87 Corvette ah that I needed some help with one weekend and he came running. He brought ah ah an entire case of O'Doul's. He was recovering an alcoholic at the time.
03:59:30
Speaker
And ah we we we we got everything done we needed to get. Struck him out.
03:59:46
Speaker
Headed to the bottom of the 10th year, it's Wilfredo Cordero Tony Gwynn, one and two.
03:59:57
Speaker
Did you watch ER, Blake?
Entertainment Preferences in the 90s
04:00:00
Speaker
I did a little bit. um Around this time, I'm... Gosh.
04:00:11
Speaker
Yeah, I'm trying to think what I was probably spending most of my time doing. This is 94, so I'm in eighth grade. watching a lot of basketball. Obviously, baseball is about to disappoint me.
04:00:25
Speaker
Sure. Watching but a lot of football, watching Simpsons.
04:00:36
Speaker
Probably some SNCC maybe around this time, too. some Oh, sure. Some Saturday Night Nick. hu Not watching any wrestling at all.
04:00:47
Speaker
No wrestling in eighth grade, huh? wow Wow. Not in July of 94. it's It's a lot of basketball and baseball and football. That's pretty much about it.
04:01:05
Speaker
The wrestling wouldn't come back around until
04:01:10
Speaker
Christmas time in 95.
04:01:14
Speaker
What was it that pulled you back? In your house, beware, dog. Not beware, a dog. the The one with Brett and Bulldog. Brett and Davey.
04:01:26
Speaker
yeah Yeah. December 95.
04:01:32
Speaker
My goodness. And then also the edgy heel Diesel. I thought that he was pretty fucking cool.
04:01:44
Speaker
He was slapping black gloves only, you understand.
04:01:51
Speaker
A man protects his family. Because you can't remember, I'm like coming back from the Hulkster and Warrior and all that stuff. And then i see a i see him walk in that line, only slapping black gu gloves, Big Daddy Cool.
04:02:08
Speaker
You know? I'm thinking, shit, let's fucking go. I'm ready kick some ass around this time myself.
04:02:17
Speaker
Black gloves only. Exactly. And then he left.
04:02:24
Speaker
I was really disappointed when him and Razor left.
04:02:28
Speaker
I was like, you know, we were just getting going, guys. What are you doing? That fucking early 96 roster was amazing.
04:02:42
Speaker
Patuka? Patuka Perez?
04:02:48
Speaker
Arriba.
04:02:54
Speaker
Here go.
04:03:01
Speaker
Jason Bire.
04:03:05
Speaker
Probably not the best guy to have out there, if I'm being honest with you. I had a Jason Bire 94 Flair rookie card. Remember Flair's?
04:03:19
Speaker
Fleer Flair. Fleer. Fleer. I, I, I, for a second, my brain was telling me that you were just mispronouncing Fleer. And I was like, what the fuck is going on?
04:03:29
Speaker
And then I realized you were talking about the Fleer flares. Yeah. I remember them.
04:03:35
Speaker
Now it gets right on through, doesn't it? My goodness. Basically Fleer's like, you know, high Dan, high dollar. They were expensive. Like $3 a pack. If I remember. Oh, fuck. No, was,
04:03:48
Speaker
thought they were like four or five, but... Oh, wow. Okay. I don't know. Shit started to get out of hand around this time.
04:03:59
Speaker
I guess 94. Yeah, I guess you're right. i I always think of those score cards that had like the fire background.
04:04:11
Speaker
They were like black with um with red ah red highlights. Score... What was the... God. The set. Can't remember what it was called. God damn it.
04:04:23
Speaker
I have a bunch of them. But right about then, i maybe that was 92 or 93. That's kind of at the tail end of when I was buying packs like every day. Like 93. Yeah. The Upper Deck SPs came out.
04:04:38
Speaker
And those are like the first like Stadium Club or the Upper Deck Stadium Club. And then the Upper Deck SPs. I think those fuckers were like 10 bucks a pack or something at one point.
04:04:49
Speaker
Here we go.
04:04:53
Speaker
up Tony Gwynn's got to huff it. There we go, Tony. Get in there. Safe. I just won the ball game for my team. I'll have a fucking turkey.
04:05:10
Speaker
You know... Heavens to Merkidroid, Pete Vukovic. Keep your pee-pee hands away from me, Moises. I've got sandwich to eat.
04:05:23
Speaker
The th throw certainly beats him there. Yeah, he just gets under it. It's the catcher's fault. There's Bonds. Look at Bonds in that ridiculous shirt. Looking like he's fucking guest starring on Martin.
04:05:37
Speaker
Was the Coogee sweater? I saw Coogee sweater somebody was wearing. Is Harry here? Hey, I'm always here. I'm just... Just about a half an inch underneath the surface.
04:05:52
Speaker
I was waiting. All the time, you know. That's the only guy I've ever heard talking about Coogees.
04:06:00
Speaker
Well, there's one other guy who loved the Coogee sweater. His name was Bill Cosby. He earns out he was a racist. I'm sorry, a rapist.
04:06:11
Speaker
Well, he did have a... Did you see the preview? Did you ever watch the Cosby Mysteries, Harry?
04:06:18
Speaker
um I'm entirely unfamiliar with what you're talking about. I was too, until they showed the commercials on here. Apparently, he had some show after the Cosby show where he was a detective. Maybe he could show solve the OJ mystery.
04:06:35
Speaker
I don't know who is trust a rapist as a detective. Doesn't make a lot of sense to me, but I... I'm just a simple boy from the Midwest. That's all. Sure.
04:06:48
Speaker
I talk on the radio and I drink beer and I eat hot dogs. That's all that really matters. Blake. Do you know Moises peed on his hands, Harry? I did You know, I walked in on him in the, the, the clubhouse one time. He's all by himself.
04:07:03
Speaker
Uh, and so he wasn't using a year old or nothing. So he was, uh, he's right there in the middle of the room. ah standing over one of them, ah overneath.
04:07:13
Speaker
That's not even a word. My goodness. He was standing over one of those big old ice tubs, right? It looks like a big old tin, tin tub and full ice and he was peeing on the ice, but he had his hands in the way of his, his stream of, uh, urine. You understand?
04:07:31
Speaker
do. So I stopped in and I went, Moses, what are you doing? And he said, um a peeing on my hands. Um, And I said, I'll carry on then.
04:07:47
Speaker
Well, Harry, it's a shame it took you so long to come by again. Scintillating stuff, man. I know. Boy, oh boy, that game, he's real positive today. I've been listening the whole time.
04:07:59
Speaker
I don't really quite understand the shit he was reading earlier. Sounding like it was AI or something. Yeah. was going to say, that's where my mind went when his eyes were locked on the screen for five solid minutes.
04:08:12
Speaker
Look, I'll have you know, this is ah an article from the fine folks at psychology.tv.
04:08:28
Speaker
Fred McGriff just got an Astro van as the prize to win for winning MVP, by the way. Hopefully they can rig the pedals up for him since he's so small and he can reach him. You see Gumball towers over him.
04:08:51
Speaker
oh That was for you, Adam. Ha! Oh.
04:09:00
Speaker
Well, let's just give it dedicate the end of the program here to Adam. Go ahead, Jimmy. Tell us what you thought of this ballgame. Oh, baby, I'm not much for baseball. I'm more of a, ah more of a ah I guess if you wanted to put me into mainstream sports, I'm more of a hockey guy.
04:09:19
Speaker
I would not have guessed that about you, Jimmy. did you Were you exposed to hockey when you were traveling a lot with ah ah the Quebecers? Is that what that was about?
04:09:30
Speaker
Well, it's basically like you're just dancing with skates, baby. You out there nice, just dancing, dancing. want to keep on, keep on. Hey, at this. It's radar gun provided by jugs.
04:09:41
Speaker
Like titties, baby. Ha ha.
04:09:45
Speaker
National League wins the 1994 All-Star Game 8-7 in 10 endings. I think we're getting post-game here. Jesus Christ, what is this?
04:09:57
Speaker
Yeah, is. it's They actually changed channels to yeah ESPN to to to listen to watch the post-game show with Chris Berman. I hate Chris Berman.
04:10:10
Speaker
I can't believe he's still on television.
04:10:15
Speaker
He's kind of a mess of a human being.
04:10:20
Speaker
I'm sure. some short legs on Hammond. look at it Look at his legs. Look at how short they are
04:10:26
Speaker
You can't dance with legs that short, baby.
04:10:34
Speaker
Peter Gammon has always looked 70 years old. Yeah, it's like the extreme version of the Arne Anderson thing, right? He looks like a northeastern Lady G.
04:10:48
Speaker
forgot we talked about Lady G in part one. That's pretty good.
04:10:54
Speaker
Jim Cott's a real Tim McCarver-type asshole. Oh, you look at him looking at the camera making a face like, Oh yeah, look at my face. I'm going to talk to the camera directly.
04:11:06
Speaker
i'm ah I'm dollar bin Joe Theismann. That's who I am. Yeah, I've always hated Jim Cott.
04:11:16
Speaker
He looks like, yeah, he looks like Theismann's brother who has Down syndrome. He's a human toe with a fat dick.
04:11:34
Speaker
I mean, okay. hey Hey, Blake, I'm glad you brought that up. Got any pictures? And right now, Tim Cotts got a huge dog.
04:11:46
Speaker
And pervert Rush will always hold pictures. He never got to be on Jimmy's team.
04:11:53
Speaker
You should hear Angel Hernandez talk about him in the shower.