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Episode 33 - Indians @ White Sox - July 15, 1994
12 Plays2 months ago
It's us, The Whole Ballgame. And yes, we are watching one!
Rick's back, Gabe's got testicles, Jimmy found his megaphone, Charlie stops by, El Amigo is back too.
Oh, Joey Cora sounds like a mouse.
Yep. Merry Christmas. Watch along: https://youtu.be/dRJ7RPiQE60?si=4Et6I8NvsXEj3aTT
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Transcript
Albert Bell's Corked Bat Heist
00:00:21
The Whole Ballgame
Albert Bell's cork bat game in 1994 remains one of baseball's most aggressively unhinged moments. When umpires seized his bat, Cleveland didn't protest politely. They launched a heist movie.
00:00:35
The Whole Ballgame
Jason Grimsley ceiling-crawled like a budget action hero to swap out the evidence while Bell acted like a man deeply offended that anyone would question his perfectly normal, extremely explosive bat.
00:00:48
The Whole Ballgame
The suspension that followed felt less like justice and more like a parent grounding a kid who definitely knows what he did and would absolutely do it again.
1994 MLB Strike Fallout
00:00:58
The Whole Ballgame
Then Major League Baseball decided to cancel Christmas.
00:01:01
The Whole Ballgame
About a month later, 1994 strike wiped out the World Series and replaced joy with press conferences, legal jargon, and a deep sense of betrayal.
00:01:13
The Whole Ballgame
Fans were left staring at December calendars with nothing but resentment and reruns, wondering how a sport built on nostalgia could so casually torch its own traditions.
00:01:23
The Whole Ballgame
No October drama, no champions, just a lump of coal wrapped in a collective bargaining agreement.
Albert Bell: Baseball's Anti-Hero?
00:01:31
The Whole Ballgame
If baseball were Santa, it left the country on red.
00:01:36
The Whole Ballgame
Which is why Albert Bell ends up feeling like a twisted version of Santa Claus himself. He brought gifts, towering home runs, fear, destruction, but only on his terms, and he looked furious the entire time.
00:01:49
The Whole Ballgame
Bell didn't spread cheer, he enforced it. Lurking in the shadows of this holiday nightmare is the entirely fictional villain, Rick.
00:02:00
The Whole Ballgame
A weird, unsettling baseball goblin abandoned in Fenville like a cursed elf on the shelf no one asked for. Rick exists only to remind us that 1994 baseball was chaotic, slightly cursed, and populated by characters who felt less like athletes and more like urban legends whispered during a lockout.
00:02:23
The Whole Ballgame
Two more sleeps till Christmas. How we doing, Blakers?
00:02:28
uncleStinky
ho ho ho over here it's santi claus it's a joey a butterfugo over here over yeah
00:02:40
The Whole Ballgame
Where is he?
00:02:46
The Whole Ballgame
Been a minute. my
00:02:47
uncleStinky
what was that what was that about the elf rick you went on a weird tangent there at the end and
00:02:54
The Whole Ballgame
Well, I, you know, I think Gabe believed that I was going to be ah along along for the ride, as it were, for his new his new location, his new home.
00:03:06
The Whole Ballgame
But, um hey hey, Blake, Have you ever seen the movie Cape Fear?
00:03:13
uncleStinky
I
00:03:14
The Whole Ballgame
Yeah, I learned a trick or two and and they have that new minivan and there's a lot of extra things to hold on to up underneath that sum gun.
00:03:24
uncleStinky
Oh, okay.
00:03:25
The Whole Ballgame
And so when when Jamie brought the baby over, I went ahead and s smuggled myself underneath the minivan and slept in the garage for a day or two. But, you know, the the green couch is back in the office the way it should be.
00:03:36
uncleStinky
Yeah.
00:03:39
The Whole Ballgame
You can see a little sliver of it there in Gabe's video.
00:03:41
uncleStinky
Yeah, I did. it Yeah, yeah.
00:03:42
The Whole Ballgame
And that's where I've been staying. Yeah.
00:03:47
uncleStinky
How you like the new place?
00:03:48
The Whole Ballgame
he he thought He thought he was going to get away with leaving me in that basement, but a
00:03:54
uncleStinky
probably misunderstanding.
00:03:54
The Whole Ballgame
no no, I don't think so. i Look, he he tied me to the the the the ceiling in the basement with ah with an old extension cord, so I'm pretty sure pretty sure it was on purpose, but...
00:04:08
uncleStinky
Well, that might have been the day he was worried about the rapture.
00:04:12
The Whole Ballgame
Oh, that could be too, I guess. I guess I could give him the benefit of the doubt. But ah when the new owners found out that the basement leaked to the way that it did and the realtor emailed Gabe to ask him about it, and he said, no, it never happened to me.
00:04:15
uncleStinky
Didn't want lose you. Uh-huh.
00:04:23
uncleStinky
Oh. No, it didn't.
00:04:25
The Whole Ballgame
ah
00:04:26
uncleStinky
Oh.
00:04:27
The Whole Ballgame
What?
00:04:27
uncleStinky
a
00:04:31
uncleStinky
no it didn't
00:04:33
The Whole Ballgame
I told him, I said, you either let me come there and stay or I'm going to tell them all your dirty little secrets.
00:04:38
uncleStinky
a
00:04:40
The Whole Ballgame
And so here I am with the family.
00:04:40
uncleStinky
ah
00:04:42
The Whole Ballgame
the The Christmas tree is all lit up and Gabe can look at it and presents underneath it. And he can't wait to see that little girl. ah
00:04:50
uncleStinky
Oh no.
00:04:51
The Whole Ballgame
okay
00:04:52
uncleStinky
Spreading like a virus.
00:04:54
The Whole Ballgame
There it is. How's everybody doing?
00:04:57
uncleStinky
Oh, it's just me, so I guess we're fine.
00:05:02
uncleStinky
Oh baby, thanks for asking.
00:05:02
The Whole Ballgame
I expect, I, i that's that.
00:05:05
uncleStinky
Did you hear they got my megaphone back, Gabe?
00:05:05
The Whole Ballgame
There it is. They did. They found your megaphone, Jimmy.
00:05:10
uncleStinky
Oh baby.
00:05:10
The Whole Ballgame
I'm so excited for you.
00:05:12
uncleStinky
I can dance again for Christmas.
00:05:14
The Whole Ballgame
Keep on dancing, baby. Uh, it's, it's what we're here for.
00:05:16
uncleStinky
Oh...
00:05:18
The Whole Ballgame
Uh, we're here for the whole ball game is what we're here for. And,
00:05:22
uncleStinky
I'm not too happy if anybody gives a shit.
00:05:26
The Whole Ballgame
Charlie, if if I may be so bold, I'm pretty sure I give more more care about you than just about anybody else on this phone call, including myself.
00:05:36
uncleStinky
Did you see my friend Juan Cena's last match?
00:05:41
The Whole Ballgame
no No, I did not. I did not watch it. I saw the end of it, but I didn't watch the the match itself. No, what happened?
00:05:49
uncleStinky
He wrestled Andre the Giant and won
00:05:52
The Whole Ballgame
Wow, that's pretty exciting, especially considering Andre's been dead for more than 20 years. Pretty good.
00:06:03
uncleStinky
has never been much of a wrestler. He's always been more of a like a Mexican tuxedo salesman. But I didn't even really know he did it, to be honest with you. but ah how I turned the TV on and there he was with Andre the Giant.
00:06:18
uncleStinky
But did you know they opened it all and me go back up out east?
00:06:22
The Whole Ballgame
heard I heard, heard, I heard that they, they moved into another, another unit there in the, the bad mall, right?
00:06:30
uncleStinky
No, that's a good mall. They closed the bad mall down. Bad mall's closed.
00:06:33
The Whole Ballgame
Oh, they closed the bad mall down.
00:06:35
uncleStinky
It's all gone, Gabe. It's all gone. No more. No more chair massages.
00:06:41
The Whole Ballgame
That's really upsetting.
00:06:43
uncleStinky
But El Emigo has moved to east with the Toys R Us. I went there with Blake and his boy couple weekends ago. It was okay. It's just a bunch of shelves and shit.
00:06:55
uncleStinky
set up in and and and all
00:06:56
The Whole Ballgame
Yeah, we gotta to we we got one here too. It's a place called Great Lakes Crossing that used to be like a ah a big Mills style mall, you know, just a giant one.
00:07:08
The Whole Ballgame
There's a Toys R Us in there and it's it's like three aisles of of racks and that's that's it.
00:07:15
uncleStinky
The pervert behind the counter said next year they're gonna get permanent shelling. I don't know. Maybe I can get a job there.
00:07:24
The Whole Ballgame
I mean, look, if they got a warehouse, Charlie, I'm sure you'd fit right in.
00:07:28
uncleStinky
No, fuck that. I'd be like Jeffrey the Giraffe. I'd be Charlie the Cock. Come by your toys there, little kids. It's Charlie the Cock. I don't know.
00:07:39
uncleStinky
We'll work on it.
00:07:41
The Whole Ballgame
Yeah, I think that needs a little workshop in Charles.
00:07:44
uncleStinky
How about I said that, we go go with
00:07:49
uncleStinky
Huff's house. Or Huff Daddy. Or maybe Hung Daddy. That's right. You call me Hung Daddy. Come on down to Hung Daddy toys. Don't worry.
00:08:00
uncleStinky
We ain't going to hang your kids or your daddy. We ain't Christmas in the wild.
00:08:07
The Whole Ballgame
Oh, boy.
00:08:08
uncleStinky
Happy, happy holidays, gay, Merry Christmas. Put that stupid hand on.
00:08:12
The Whole Ballgame
Thank you, Charles.
00:08:15
uncleStinky
You look like a pervert.
00:08:18
The Whole Ballgame
Yeah, ah
00:08:22
The Whole Ballgame
Chad Ream is my new neighbor.
00:08:25
uncleStinky
Oh, that's very unsettling.
00:08:28
The Whole Ballgame
Oh, good. You froze for a second. I was a little worried about what was happening there.
00:08:32
uncleStinky
I'm always freezing.
00:08:35
uncleStinky
I'm ice cold, baby.
00:08:36
The Whole Ballgame
yeah
00:08:40
The Whole Ballgame
I suppose a knuckleballer's got to be ice cold, right? gotta have Got to have a certain amount of ice water in your veins to be able to throw that slow, right?
00:08:48
uncleStinky
too hot to handle Duke of the hole Gabe alright Merry Christmas y'all Merry Christmas Adam trying to keep Florida respectable
00:08:51
The Whole Ballgame
Mm-hmm. Sure.
00:09:02
The Whole Ballgame
that where Adam is? Is Adam in Florida?
00:09:04
uncleStinky
he's down in he's down in the shit
00:09:08
The Whole Ballgame
Oh, boy. Well, Florida man, thank you for listening. ah This ballgame we're watching, it's going to be a Chicago broadcast. So we've got Hawk and Wimpy on the call.
00:09:21
uncleStinky
Yes.
00:09:22
The Whole Ballgame
And if you've already loaded it up, the the
00:09:29
The Whole Ballgame
Oh, the link. That was the word I was looking for. Jesus Christ. Link is in the the show notes down underneath. And it's our good friends that this is where you find baseball on YouTube. we got the whole game here. So excited about that. um Wimpy looking as only a a victim of sexual abuse can. Yeah.
00:09:53
The Whole Ballgame
And Hawk taking full advantage of Wimpy's desire to keep him firm and erect throughout the ballgame.
00:10:05
uncleStinky
You can put it on the board. Yes.
00:10:11
The Whole Ballgame
Looks like we missed out on it too, but they have a link in the show notes there to um a saber retrospective on the corked bat game, which is interesting. We'll have to read that as we go along here, and we'll get a we'll get our good friend Albert Joey Buttafuoco over here Bell's response as we we
Chicago Baseball Broadcast Plans
00:10:36
The Whole Ballgame
go. That sounds good to you.
00:10:38
uncleStinky
Don't worry, Gabe. I'm not driving tonight.
00:10:41
The Whole Ballgame
Wonderful. I love this for us. So head on over to the...
00:10:45
uncleStinky
I'm flying.
00:10:46
The Whole Ballgame
Yeah, of course you are.
00:10:48
uncleStinky
The flying horse, Gabe, brought to you this week.
00:10:48
The Whole Ballgame
That's wonderful.
00:10:51
The Whole Ballgame
Ah.
00:10:52
uncleStinky
If the horse ain't flying, you ain't trying. Over here.
00:11:00
The Whole Ballgame
You know, before we get into the ballgame, though, you and I were texting back and forth, not not Joey, but but Blake, about the yourre you' your home team, your Kansas City Chiefs leaving town ah come 2031.
00:11:16
uncleStinky
Oh yeah. Yep.
00:11:22
The Whole Ballgame
How do you feel about that Or do you feel about that?
00:11:26
uncleStinky
I do not. I do not engage in those feelings anymore. But two, two, i ask you one question. One question only.
00:11:37
uncleStinky
Have you seen Clark Hunt's face?
00:11:41
The Whole Ballgame
No. Is that Lamar Hunt's son?
00:11:44
uncleStinky
Yes, he's he's the owner.
00:11:46
The Whole Ballgame
Got it.
00:11:46
uncleStinky
He's been the owner for however fucking long Lamar's been dead and whoever.
00:11:50
The Whole Ballgame
Mm-hmm.
00:11:52
uncleStinky
Look, I'm going to send you his face, all right?
00:11:57
The Whole Ballgame
Please send me his face.
00:11:58
uncleStinky
And then i will ask you the question, why are you surprised by any of this? Okay?
00:12:04
The Whole Ballgame
Mm-hmm.
00:12:06
uncleStinky
So it's coming at you, all right?
00:12:09
The Whole Ballgame
Here we go.
00:12:11
uncleStinky
coming from over here over there Abba!
00:12:20
The Whole Ballgame
Oh, okay. Well, there you go. There's the answer. It's the only answer we really needed, isn't it?
00:12:25
uncleStinky
Yeah. um And I believe it's Yeah, there's a weird...
00:12:28
The Whole Ballgame
Is he wearing lipstick?
00:12:31
uncleStinky
There's something weird with his lips, man. i don't know what's going on.
00:12:34
The Whole Ballgame
Mm-hmm. Yep.
00:12:35
uncleStinky
um I'm not sure if it's the wife or his daughter. but she's going, no, yes, yes, yes, yes.
00:12:41
The Whole Ballgame
No, no, no, that's him.
00:12:44
uncleStinky
They're very androgynous family. Bizarre even. um But one of them is like speaking or did speak at the, I think at the, ah or I don't know, or they were pimping out the fucking Turning Point usa halftime show or whatever.
00:13:00
The Whole Ballgame
No, for fuck's sake.
00:13:01
uncleStinky
Yeah, so, so what what I will say
00:13:01
The Whole Ballgame
That's great. Jesus Christ almighty.
00:13:08
uncleStinky
I find particularly kind of just sleazy as fuck. Like, this team just went to five fucking Super Bowls.
00:13:17
The Whole Ballgame
Yeah,
00:13:17
uncleStinky
And, i like, don't get me wrong, too. This, they're moving, like, fucking 10 to 15 miles away, maybe. This is not a...
00:13:25
The Whole Ballgame
yeah it's not like it's a huge deal. It's just what people don't realize is that it's the border is right there, right?
00:13:27
uncleStinky
No, like...
00:13:32
uncleStinky
I, to me, the... who I don't give it Yeah, like, it doesn't fucking matter whether it's... I think it's...
00:13:39
The Whole Ballgame
Are they going to be in Kansas City, Kansas, like proper?
00:13:43
The Whole Ballgame
Or is it? Wind out. Okay. Yeah.
00:13:43
uncleStinky
It's gonna be in Wyandotte County, whatever the fuck that...
00:13:46
uncleStinky
So, I don't know what falls in there, but it's all fucking... All the suburbs, fucking Olathe, which is where they're going to put the goddamn training facility and all the other bullshit. That's where I was just fucking at.
00:13:58
uncleStinky
Like, that...
00:13:58
The Whole Ballgame
Mm-hmm.
00:13:59
uncleStinky
That thing's gotten scary. Like, fuck, there's so much shit out there now that it wasn't there, but Um, so anyway, like again, this shit's all like within 10, 15 miles of, so, but you know, could you bitch about it? Could you complain about it? Sure.
00:14:19
uncleStinky
is it with everything else considered really in the grand scheme of things? No. Cause like fuck dude, Arrowhead lasted forever. And should they leave there? I don't think so. It's pretty fucking awesome. It's unique. It's, uh,
00:14:35
uncleStinky
I mean, it's still...
00:14:36
The Whole Ballgame
Kind of the last one left.
00:14:39
uncleStinky
Yeah, I mean, the Bears are leaving, right?
00:14:41
The Whole Ballgame
Well, yeah, I mean, that was the thing. I was going to bring that up. Now now they're talking about Northwest Indiana.
00:14:47
uncleStinky
Yeah, like, it it's all gross.
00:14:48
The Whole Ballgame
maya My neck of the woods.
00:14:49
uncleStinky
Like, this is late-stage capitalism shit, man.
00:14:50
The Whole Ballgame
Yeah. Yeah, it is.
00:14:52
uncleStinky
This is fucking garbage. So...
00:14:55
The Whole Ballgame
think we said that to each other earlier today. That's exactly what this is. It's the same old shit. Just another another song on the same radio station.
00:15:05
uncleStinky
It's just like, you know, you look at...
00:15:07
The Whole Ballgame
Hot Dick 105.
00:15:09
uncleStinky
Yes, that's right on there. Hot D 105.
00:15:14
uncleStinky
Five. But the, ah you know, like in baseball, you got the A's leaving, you know, they're dog shit, they suck and whatever.
00:15:19
The Whole Ballgame
and pop
00:15:25
uncleStinky
And then here, it's like, you know, and I get it again, not leaving town, but, you know, a fucking team... moving on for a better deal that just was like a goddamn dynasty.
00:15:36
uncleStinky
So, yeah
00:15:36
The Whole Ballgame
This man is a ghoul. Like this guy's face is a real problem.
00:15:39
uncleStinky
ah
00:15:40
The Whole Ballgame
I didn't realize it was this much of a problem.
00:15:43
uncleStinky
I feel like his father would probably disapprove of this. But...
00:15:48
The Whole Ballgame
What are you going to do? It's, you know, time marches on, right? That's what Tracy Lawrence would say.
00:15:55
uncleStinky
Look, I think about the only thing is for certain in each generation is like the the wealthiest, most powerful men of each generation just get a little fucking worse, probably.
00:16:08
The Whole Ballgame
Yeah. The only thing that's for sure about staying is nothing's for sure.
00:16:14
uncleStinky
Happily put.
00:16:16
The Whole Ballgame
Go ahead and head over to the, uh, the link there in the show notes and we'll get this game underway so that we're not too terribly exhausted for work tomorrow. Uh, not that we're either of us is going to do too much work tomorrow, but, um, you know, it's late.
00:16:31
The Whole Ballgame
What do you want from us? Um, I suppose what you're paying for. So here it comes. Uh, We're going to hit play in you have it up, right?
00:16:42
uncleStinky
I do.
00:16:43
The Whole Ballgame
Three, two, one, play. Yeah, it's back. Thank you.
00:16:55
The Whole Ballgame
They're on Sports Channel in Chicago.
00:16:59
The Whole Ballgame
We had one of those little black boxes on top of the TV with the the rotary dial, the clicky dial thing.
00:17:00
uncleStinky
Not. Uh
00:17:05
uncleStinky
huh. Uh huh.
00:17:06
The Whole Ballgame
That's how we would find Sports Channel.
00:17:10
uncleStinky
I was always jealous that i could not get Sports Channel.
00:17:16
The Whole Ballgame
Well, fascinating, too. Sports Channel was like the earliest version of those those local sports networks where it's like the same network in 30 cities, except they just have local sports.
00:17:25
uncleStinky
Yeah.
Nostalgia for Sports Channel
00:17:31
uncleStinky
Right. Yeah, I was always, a think we might have mentioned this, but. My sister had a satellite and they would get the sports channels. Oh Jesus, this guy's on cocaine.
00:17:41
The Whole Ballgame
there's a guy There's a guy with a problem.
00:17:45
uncleStinky
Speaking of a problem.
00:17:47
The Whole Ballgame
Black Jack McDowell on the on the bump, getting the start tonight, looking like a fucking long, long eraser pencil.
00:17:58
uncleStinky
Looking like he's heading out to the theater for the premiere of Singles.
00:18:07
The Whole Ballgame
Or threesome.
00:18:09
uncleStinky
Yeah, there you go.
00:18:10
The Whole Ballgame
Mm-hmm.
00:18:11
uncleStinky
Some other movie that's got Ethan Hawke and Janine Garofalo in it.
00:18:17
The Whole Ballgame
I went to and went to the movies last night ah by myself after the kid and it the kids went to bed. ah fuck. ah and saw
00:18:27
uncleStinky
That's good.
00:18:29
The Whole Ballgame
And saw The Housemaid with Sydney Sweeney.
00:18:34
uncleStinky
Mm-hmm.
00:18:34
The Whole Ballgame
And, you know, she takes her tits out, which is really all she's good for.
00:18:34
uncleStinky
Mm-hmm.
00:18:38
uncleStinky
Sure.
00:18:38
The Whole Ballgame
um But it was it was a real twisty piece of shit.
00:18:41
uncleStinky
Fucking whore.
00:18:45
The Whole Ballgame
A real terrible movie, but I didn't see you coming what came. So that's good.
00:18:50
uncleStinky
Oh.
00:18:50
The Whole Ballgame
And then I came. So it was good. Good, good all in all.
00:18:54
uncleStinky
Did you do it in the theater? Departed style?
00:18:55
The Whole Ballgame
Oh, yeah, of course.
00:18:56
uncleStinky
withp Whip out and fucking...
00:18:56
The Whole Ballgame
For front row.
00:19:00
The Whole Ballgame
I did. I groaned exactly like that. It was a 1020 screening. i was the only one in the the theater, so I felt comfortable enough.
00:19:06
uncleStinky
sure? Sure. I better do these lineups.
00:19:07
The Whole Ballgame
Mm-hmm.
00:19:09
uncleStinky
We got Lofton incentive. Iskale at short by Arrogate. Second. Albert over here. Eddie Murray DH-ing Jim Tomey third. Sandy Alomar behind the plate. Paul Sorrento at first. And Wayne Kirby.
00:19:27
uncleStinky
Who's that fuck? Who am I thinking? Wayne Brady. God damn it. That's what i was trying to get. i couldn't get it. Fuck. Next time.
00:19:34
The Whole Ballgame
Jack McDowell on the bump with his ah his gold MLB logo on his right shoulder. Boy, he was he was a lot skinnier than I just i remember in my brain.
00:19:49
uncleStinky
The one dog. Reigns, Johnson, and Jackson on the outfield. Ventura, Guillen, Martine, the Big Hurt, Black Jack on the mound. And behind the plate, the the assassin that kicked off the World War himself, Ron Karkavise.
00:20:09
The Whole Ballgame
I'm really glad he brought that up, Blake.
00:20:11
uncleStinky
I am too.
00:20:12
The Whole Ballgame
I gotta tell you, it's, you know, what people don't remember about the Archduke Ferdinand is that that he was really, you man, he loved sluts.
00:20:19
uncleStinky
Right.
00:20:24
uncleStinky
Oh, yeah.
00:20:27
The Whole Ballgame
I mean, ultimately, that was his undoing. I learned pretty quickly that he had a soft spot for big breasted women and tight bodied boys.
00:20:38
The Whole Ballgame
And so, yeah, you know, Hey, back then, most of these guys in the, in the, the, the area around Turkey, you know, like the middle, middle East, they didn't, they didn't give a shit about nothing.
00:20:39
uncleStinky
Oh, OK.
00:20:52
The Whole Ballgame
You know, they didn't care about morals or morality or what was right or wrong. And just, uh, they're a bunch of, uh, bunch of hedonists. that's That's the word I would use for it.
00:21:06
uncleStinky
Did somebody say something about Turkey?
00:21:15
The Whole Ballgame
I say, Blake, I got to tell you, I don't appreciate it when you you jump on here and you start flapping your gums, moving your little cock gobbler around like like you know like you know who I am.
00:21:19
uncleStinky
ah Hey, easy there.
00:21:30
uncleStinky
Oh, dang, dude.
00:21:30
The Whole Ballgame
who
00:21:32
The Whole Ballgame
yeah
00:21:33
uncleStinky
a Christmas came twice for Adam.
00:21:39
The Whole Ballgame
I got to tell you, between that cock-of-eye character and this old Southern gentleman, my throat's going to be real tore up in the morning.
00:21:46
uncleStinky
Ha ha ha ha ha. Yeah, well, we all make our choices.
00:21:53
The Whole Ballgame
Oh, God, what is that face on Gabe's phone? Who's that wearing lipstick? I don't want to appreciate it. Get that out of my face.
00:22:01
uncleStinky
Well, yeah, you appreciate it. That's a fellow. he's a sport He's a sports owner, Marvin.
00:22:06
The Whole Ballgame
Yeah, well, I was a sport.
00:22:06
uncleStinky
That's...
00:22:07
The Whole Ballgame
I wasn't a sports owner. I wanted to be, but but I guess ah if a prerequisite is wearing lipstick like that as a man, and I'm glad I never was.
00:22:09
uncleStinky
I know.
00:22:17
uncleStinky
You probably knew his daddy. Lamar Hunt.
00:22:20
The Whole Ballgame
Oh, Lamar, I'll go way back. Yes, indeedy.
00:22:23
uncleStinky
I had a feeling he might.
00:22:23
The Whole Ballgame
You know, you know we are we did share a predilection to...
00:22:24
uncleStinky
Hmm.
00:22:31
The Whole Ballgame
Well, but maybe we shouldn't talk about that quite yet.
00:22:32
uncleStinky
Close.
00:22:34
The Whole Ballgame
It's a little early in the ballgame, you understand? Mm-hmm.
00:22:36
uncleStinky
Jesus, Marvin.
00:22:39
uncleStinky
Kenny Lofton with a stolen base.
00:22:41
The Whole Ballgame
Blake, I would be remiss. I missed i missed out here.
00:22:42
uncleStinky
Nah.
00:22:43
The Whole Ballgame
Yeah, ken that's Kenneth Alton.
00:22:43
uncleStinky
Yeah.
00:22:44
The Whole Ballgame
We like him. i I would like him if he was a little shorter, if I'm being honest. Anyway, ah
00:22:51
uncleStinky
He's like
00:22:53
The Whole Ballgame
he's lithe, but I'd appreciate if he was more like four foot three or less. You understand?
00:23:01
The Whole Ballgame
92 pounds, I can't believe you hit that nail right on the head, man.
00:23:05
uncleStinky
so one big turkey
00:23:08
The Whole Ballgame
That's what I was going to ask you about. I'd be remiss if I didn't. you know we ah I usually like to stop by y'all's program and and talk about the the way I would prepare a bird and whatnot.
00:23:19
The Whole Ballgame
I think I may still do that for Christmas, but I missed out on the Thanksgiving because Gabe was moving or something and and he couldn't get me my recording equipment in time.
00:23:19
uncleStinky
yeah yeah That should be something, yeah.
00:23:30
uncleStinky
Well, you know, how you gonna make a turkey when you're mobile?
00:23:30
The Whole Ballgame
But anyway, um how was your how was your Thanksgiving holiday there, Blakers?
00:23:38
uncleStinky
It is fine.
00:23:40
The Whole Ballgame
I'm glad he always liked to give me so much material to work with here on the program. I tell you, it makes doing these things a real delight.
00:23:51
uncleStinky
I tell you Marvin, I'd give you more if I could remember. i don't know. Like, I'm not sure what I did. i think I went to my mother-in-law's and then I came home. Um, like usual.
00:24:02
The Whole Ballgame
what what What did you have to eat over at the mother-in-law's? Did she cook the bird herself or was she one of them folks who went to the store and bought a pre-cooked bird and throw it in the oven for 25 minutes before the game starts or whatever?
00:24:17
uncleStinky
I, you know, I think you, you cook it for a few hours, don't you?
00:24:21
The Whole Ballgame
Well, it depends on whether you bought it pre-cooked or or if ye ye you're doing the thing from scratch, your way you ought to.
00:24:29
uncleStinky
I'm not sure about scratch, but I, I know it took her few hours to cook the bird. So had to add some ham, some, uh, potatoes, green bean casserole stuffing, you know, the usual, I think this was going to drop Marvin Indians.
00:24:47
The Whole Ballgame
Sure did.
00:24:49
uncleStinky
Indians are on the board.
00:24:50
The Whole Ballgame
They up 1-0 here in the bottom of the first inning.
00:24:54
uncleStinky
Those beautiful, beautiful uniforms.
00:24:54
The Whole Ballgame
Top of the first inning. Excuse me.
00:24:59
The Whole Ballgame
Yeah, these are the uniforms they should be looking for looking like. You know, I saw earlier today, i was here hanging out with Gabe, looking and watching what he was looking at on the internet, which would be a dangerous proposition from time to time, you understand.
Albert Bell's Bat Scandal Revisited
00:25:12
uncleStinky
I've seen the profile.
00:25:12
The Whole Ballgame
Anyway, he was...
00:25:16
The Whole Ballgame
He was there
00:25:21
The Whole Ballgame
he was there watching the ah the the ball game from 1999 when old boy was Gene Lamont out here, John, with the umpire.
00:25:33
The Whole Ballgame
I think he might have some kind of problem.
00:25:33
uncleStinky
That is
00:25:35
The Whole Ballgame
ah I think this is the beginning of the end here for Mr. Bell in this. in this game anyway um he was there uh looking at the the game from 1999 where they they hit albert bell and uh
00:25:51
uncleStinky
I'm checking the bat, Marvin. You called it. Here we go
00:25:57
The Whole Ballgame
interesting
00:25:59
uncleStinky
go. The umpire is looking at the end of the bat, seeing that there's been some shenanigans there.
00:26:10
The Whole Ballgame
Or Hawk said, it corked?
00:26:14
uncleStinky
Mm-hmm.
00:26:14
The Whole Ballgame
And Wimpy said, it could be. Hawk said, it might be. as if there were a home run, you see?
00:26:20
uncleStinky
Yes.
00:26:22
The Whole Ballgame
It's very, very clever stuff.
00:26:22
uncleStinky
Uh-huh.
00:26:25
uncleStinky
Yeah, very tongue-in-cheek, huh?
00:26:35
The Whole Ballgame
Got Hawk explaining exactly how to cork a bat.
00:26:39
uncleStinky
I took it the wood out and I insorted the cock over here. This is bullshit, Gabe.
00:26:48
The Whole Ballgame
Why? Well, tell me why it's bullshit, Joey.
00:26:52
uncleStinky
I didn't do it.
00:26:55
The Whole Ballgame
Hmm. But didn't you?
00:26:58
uncleStinky
I couldn't have.
00:27:00
The Whole Ballgame
You couldn't have? All right.
00:27:02
uncleStinky
Nah. Did they have the bat?
00:27:08
uncleStinky
How could I do it when the guy that did it was over there and i'm over here?
00:27:15
The Whole Ballgame
You were...
00:27:18
The Whole Ballgame
Over here. Yeah, got it.
00:27:22
The Whole Ballgame
Is that Eddie Murray?
00:27:25
uncleStinky
Eddie Murray over there.
00:27:27
The Whole Ballgame
Okay, just making sure. Yeah, Gene Lamont on top of things. Really ah making things happen.
00:27:34
uncleStinky
You know what? Personally, if I was Albert Hawk admitting to getting caught cheating.
00:27:43
uncleStinky
um
00:27:46
uncleStinky
Oh, there's a John Hart, the GM. That's little cup because wife Sandy. What do you think about her?
00:27:56
The Whole Ballgame
ah Sandy clearly loves anal sex.
00:28:00
uncleStinky
She's asking him if he did it, and he is not wanting to look at her and respond.
00:28:04
The Whole Ballgame
Yeah, he didn't look at it. Yeah, he like turned his whole body away so his face didn't even make incidental eye contact with her.
00:28:12
uncleStinky
Sandy, Sandy, shut the fuck up.
00:28:14
The Whole Ballgame
Stop. Stop fucking talking. Stop. like You want to talk about this?
00:28:18
uncleStinky
there's There's fucking cameras on us, you stupid bitch.
00:28:18
The Whole Ballgame
We'll talk about it in the car.
00:28:21
uncleStinky
They can read my fucking lips.
00:28:25
The Whole Ballgame
You know what, bitch?
00:28:26
uncleStinky
This is why I hit you.
00:28:26
The Whole Ballgame
Go wait. Go wait in the fucking car. God damn it. Your Mary Hart fucking haircut. You pissed me off. Fuck out of my face.
00:28:35
uncleStinky
It's only the first inning.
00:28:41
uncleStinky
God.
00:28:41
The Whole Ballgame
God, that guy's a two real 2T, isn't he? Jesus Christ.
00:28:45
uncleStinky
He's on MLB Network all the fucking time now.
00:28:48
The Whole Ballgame
And a tan blazer with that green polka dot shirt underneath it.
00:28:48
uncleStinky
But, um...
00:28:52
The Whole Ballgame
Hey, was a nice one.
00:28:53
uncleStinky
Look at that by Robin.
00:28:55
The Whole Ballgame
Not too shabby.
00:29:00
The Whole Ballgame
Paco sucks it up.
00:29:02
uncleStinky
Oh, I was... what The point I was about to make before we got... sidetracked.
00:29:05
The Whole Ballgame
Yeah.
00:29:07
uncleStinky
I got to tell you, if I was Albert, i would I would go find Gene after this game, probably.
00:29:17
The Whole Ballgame
Yeah, i can't imagine I can't imagine a scenario where he didn't try try looking for him at the very least. You know, whether or not they ever had an interaction this day, i don't know. But I i i can't imagine scenario where he didn't try to look for him.
00:29:32
uncleStinky
would have done.
00:29:36
uncleStinky
We just go by the fucking Matt.
00:29:36
The Whole Ballgame
It is Eddie Murray.
00:29:38
uncleStinky
No shit. We established that.
00:29:41
The Whole Ballgame
Yeah.
00:29:42
uncleStinky
He was over there.
00:29:42
The Whole Ballgame
Well, no, we didn't. You never answered my question.
00:29:44
uncleStinky
said he was over there.
00:29:45
The Whole Ballgame
Oh, he's over there. Yeah, you did. I'm sorry, Joey.
00:29:47
uncleStinky
He's on deck. Come on.
00:29:48
The Whole Ballgame
I apologize.
00:29:51
uncleStinky
Come on.
00:29:51
The Whole Ballgame
See, this I hate too. um So, and I don't know why I dislike it so much, but I don't like it when a team other than the Yankees or the Cubs don't have their names on the back of their uniforms.
00:30:04
uncleStinky
Oh, yeah.
00:30:05
The Whole Ballgame
And the White Sox here, they don't. they don't Even though I'm a White Sox fan, it's very upsetting to me. And I think it's because mostly because I don't know who's who.
00:30:16
uncleStinky
Yeah, it usually comes back to something like that, right? Yeah.
00:30:19
The Whole Ballgame
ah It's about me. Nobody else. What do we got here?
00:30:23
uncleStinky
We're all ego-driven. We got what Paco Martin at second, Tim Raines in left, the Big Herd at first, Julio, the Dominion's one, Franco DH-ing, Robin Ventura at third, Darren Jackson in right, the one-dog, Lance Johnson center, the Assassin, Kark, behind the plate, and Ozzy Guy-Zhen at short.
00:30:44
uncleStinky
Mark Clark on the mound, 10-3 on the year with the three point seven one e r a you got a bunch of You got a bunch of weird letters at the top of your thing?
00:30:51
The Whole Ballgame
Interestingly enough.
00:30:55
The Whole Ballgame
Oh, yeah.
00:30:55
uncleStinky
and Okay.
00:30:55
The Whole Ballgame
Joe, N.A., N.A., Q, X, X, X, N.A.
00:31:00
uncleStinky
Yep, yep. All right. That makes me feel better.
00:31:07
The Whole Ballgame
Darren Jackson in the lineup today. Darren Jackson been the voice of Chicago White Sox baseball for, gosh, since 2003 or 2004.
00:31:19
uncleStinky
Yeah, he's kind of a goon.
00:31:23
The Whole Ballgame
That's an interesting word for him. I wouldn't have used the word goon to describe Aaron Jackson, mainly because of like his stature. He's ah kind of a little guy. and In my mind, goon is a big one.
00:31:36
The Whole Ballgame
Of course, now these kids have taken over the word goon, which is really upsetting to me because you know I'm not gooning. I'm just jerking off. What are you talking about?
00:31:48
uncleStinky
You talking about fucking Bill Irwin, dude?
00:31:53
The Whole Ballgame
I did really enjoy those ah those boots that he wore that looked like ice skates.
00:31:59
uncleStinky
Aaron Jackson was 6 foot 185 pounds. of it is...
00:32:03
The Whole Ballgame
Yeah, diminutive. I'm 6'5", 350. What's your point?
00:32:09
uncleStinky
yeah that's abnormal too
00:32:12
The Whole Ballgame
i don't, I don't, I don't, don't, I don't, I don't.
00:32:16
uncleStinky
all all of it is
00:32:17
The Whole Ballgame
Yeah, all right.
00:32:18
uncleStinky
Like, I mean, come on he is He is probably, i mean, I'd say he's slightly above average in both of those things.
00:32:20
The Whole Ballgame
Ha, ha, ha, ha, ha.
00:32:30
uncleStinky
What's the average man, like five nine
00:32:33
The Whole Ballgame
I don't know. Tim Raines, a Hall of Famer.
00:32:37
uncleStinky
I think so, especially if Harold Baines is.
00:32:40
The Whole Ballgame
Yeah.
00:32:44
The Whole Ballgame
Omar Vizquel gets it just in the nick of time.
00:32:46
uncleStinky
ah think he was safe.
00:32:52
uncleStinky
see what I liked about the the tribe this year, and I think they did a few more years, but on their home uniforms, they would wear red cleats.
00:33:02
The Whole Ballgame
Oh, interesting.
00:33:03
uncleStinky
Mm-hmm, mm-hmm.
00:33:04
The Whole Ballgame
So let me ask you this. the Manny Ramirez comes around in 95 then? Or is it later?
00:33:11
uncleStinky
Nah, he's here in 94.
00:33:12
The Whole Ballgame
is it
00:33:13
uncleStinky
This rookie year.
00:33:14
The Whole Ballgame
He's here now. Okay. Because I was looking at that lineup. He's not in the lineup today, but um it's an incredible it's a frigging murderer's row, that lineup of oh guys.
00:33:20
uncleStinky
is rookie here
00:33:25
The Whole Ballgame
It's done unbelievable.
00:33:28
uncleStinky
Yep, they got about three year, four year run here.
00:33:34
The Whole Ballgame
Big hurt up to bat now and looking as only Frank can look when he's not covered in pillows.
00:33:42
uncleStinky
Motherfuckers batting 382 for God's sakes.
00:33:45
The Whole Ballgame
It's July 15th, everybody. It's Jamie's, excuse me, Bob's second birthday today.
00:33:53
uncleStinky
Today or July fifteenth
00:33:55
The Whole Ballgame
July 1994. Mm-hmm.
00:34:00
uncleStinky
That's good.
00:34:01
The Whole Ballgame
you
00:34:05
uncleStinky
like Frank's cleats.
00:34:09
The Whole Ballgame
Oh, yeah. See, those are... What are those, Reeboks?
00:34:13
uncleStinky
Yeah, yeah.
00:34:13
The Whole Ballgame
No, those are Jordans.
00:34:13
uncleStinky
that No, they're Reeboks.
00:34:15
The Whole Ballgame
Okay.
00:34:16
uncleStinky
Big Hurts were exclusive. They were Reebok.
00:34:18
The Whole Ballgame
Uh-huh. Okay.
00:34:21
uncleStinky
They also had Big Hurt Baseball. Did you ever play that?
00:34:24
The Whole Ballgame
Oh, yeah. Yeah, plenty. It wasn't as good. it was a Griffey game, but it's fine.
00:34:28
uncleStinky
No, it sucked. I had a Frank Thomas poster on my wall. Big one. Like a 16 by 20.
00:34:34
The Whole Ballgame
Did you really? I didn't know that.
00:34:36
uncleStinky
And I had Frank.
00:34:38
The Whole Ballgame
Hey! Hey!
00:34:39
uncleStinky
Uh-oh. Got under that one.
00:34:41
The Whole Ballgame
Yeah.
00:34:41
uncleStinky
had Frank and I had ah Cal Ripken. And Ozzy.
00:34:48
The Whole Ballgame
Ozzie Smith, right?
00:34:49
uncleStinky
Yeah, yeah.
00:34:50
The Whole Ballgame
Yeah. Not Ozzie Gijin.
00:34:53
uncleStinky
Not Ozzy Gijen, no. No.
00:34:56
The Whole Ballgame
Cobble the second inning here in Chicago, Cleveland up one to nothing.
00:35:01
uncleStinky
Had those guys, and then I also had a bunch of, uh, I had a WWF Attitude poster.
00:35:08
The Whole Ballgame
Sure.
00:35:09
uncleStinky
and um, that's right.
00:35:11
The Whole Ballgame
Get it?
00:35:14
uncleStinky
And I had a picture of chick in lingerie named Sandy on my ceiling. So when I laid on my bed, I could look up at it.
00:35:25
The Whole Ballgame
Like the grandfather and in National Lampoon's Christmas Vacation. Looking at Janet Jackson.
00:35:32
uncleStinky
Yeah, exactly.
00:35:33
The Whole Ballgame
I get it.
00:35:36
The Whole Ballgame
Hallelujah. Holy shit. Where's the Tylenol?
00:35:41
uncleStinky
then I also had this poster that I made of cut out magazine photos of Triple H. Which, that's fine.
00:35:50
The Whole Ballgame
It's all about the game.
00:35:51
uncleStinky
It said the game. You know you know what the the thing that said game? You know what it was? It was from the cover of a GamePro magazine.
00:36:01
The Whole Ballgame
Nice.
00:36:02
uncleStinky
Yeah.
00:36:03
The Whole Ballgame
Really good shit.
00:36:04
uncleStinky
Yeah, it's like a serial killer thing, you know? The fucking cut out the magazines, yeah, of Triple H.
00:36:07
The Whole Ballgame
Yeah, yeah. Yeah, of course.
00:36:10
uncleStinky
A serial killer tribute to Paul Levesque. that's That's what you could call it. It's probably in a storage unit in Memphis, Tennessee, if I had to guess. Keeps getting better.
00:36:23
uncleStinky
Sandy Alomar Jr. at the bat.
00:36:24
The Whole Ballgame
I'm going to find that fucking thing one day. got a time capsule. Somebody on the learning channel is going to open it up with a pair of lock cutters and find your tribute to the game from 1996. Seven, eight.
00:36:45
uncleStinky
na na naty this is this is No, This is fucking like a shit.
00:36:47
The Whole Ballgame
seven eight
00:36:52
uncleStinky
99. This is when he became the game.
00:36:55
The Whole Ballgame
Wait a second.
00:37:01
The Whole Ballgame
you You were making shit like that when you were 19? Yeah.
00:37:06
uncleStinky
Oh yeah, I made, it was like a fucking poster. was a big poster board.
00:37:10
The Whole Ballgame
yeah Yeah, doing it doing it yourself?
00:37:12
uncleStinky
No.
00:37:13
The Whole Ballgame
All right.
00:37:15
uncleStinky
I did.
00:37:15
The Whole Ballgame
Nothing wrong with that.
00:37:18
uncleStinky
Yeah, I got laid 700 times in the room with it, so it worked fine.
00:37:19
The Whole Ballgame
Nothing suspect at all. Nope.
00:37:24
The Whole Ballgame
I don't know. I don't know.
00:37:26
uncleStinky
No, you don't.
00:37:27
The Whole Ballgame
i don't know.
00:37:27
uncleStinky
that's
00:37:28
The Whole Ballgame
It must have been a pretty shallow shallow pool around there.
00:37:33
uncleStinky
Yeah, I guess so. Fucking Northeast Indiana. Horse shit. How many kids were you in your graduating class?
00:37:43
uncleStinky
26?
00:37:43
The Whole Ballgame
Northwest Indiana is 26. Thank you very much.
00:37:46
uncleStinky
twenty six Yeah, okay.
00:37:47
The Whole Ballgame
Yeah. yeah
00:37:47
uncleStinky
I think I had like 250 in mine.
00:37:50
The Whole Ballgame
Look at that, 10 times, 10 times as many. What a beautiful night on the south side of Chicago here. Look at those, those zero stratus clouds fill in the, fill in the sky on a beautiful July evening.
00:38:05
The Whole Ballgame
Hey, his name is Clark Profile. What a weird name.
00:38:09
uncleStinky
Nah, his last name's Clark, and that's his profile, you dipshit.
00:38:13
The Whole Ballgame
it's pronounced Profile. Got it. Clark Profile. It's weird that he's got his first name on the back of his uniform.
00:38:21
uncleStinky
Nope.
00:38:24
The Whole Ballgame
He said, nope.
00:38:30
uncleStinky
Julio's batting 312.
00:38:33
The Whole Ballgame
The diminutive one, over 300 here on the season, ready to let one rip and turn a single into a double without even trying.
00:38:43
uncleStinky
Looks pretty good size to me,
00:38:45
The Whole Ballgame
don't think so. look at it Look at that. He makes himself real small, lithe, fast, quick.
00:38:53
The Whole Ballgame
Oh, see, look at that. Pop foul, out of play.
00:38:57
uncleStinky
got 14 homers.
00:39:05
uncleStinky
You really wouldn't call that guy a goon?
00:39:06
The Whole Ballgame
adding three that Batting three, 399 at home, Frank Thomas, on the year.
00:39:07
uncleStinky
Seriously?
00:39:16
uncleStinky
He looks like a total fucking goon.
00:39:19
The Whole Ballgame
Who's that? Oh, Darren Jackson?
00:39:21
uncleStinky
Yes.
00:39:21
The Whole Ballgame
Yeah. DJ. DJ.
00:39:25
The Whole Ballgame
What do you think, DJ? Well, I'll tell you. Okay. Or that was maybe that was Jerry Reinstorf. don't know.
00:39:44
uncleStinky
hanging, people.
00:39:48
The Whole Ballgame
I was hoping that Carlos Baerga was going to let ah run directly into Albert Bell there. it didn't happen.
00:39:55
uncleStinky
Why would you hope that?
00:39:55
The Whole Ballgame
You see that big old chain Carlos is wearing things flopping around like crazy when he runs big fat gold chain on Carlos's neck.
00:40:02
uncleStinky
What a hot dog. What a fucking hot dog.
00:40:07
The Whole Ballgame
About time we had the return of Billy Martin to the program.
00:40:12
uncleStinky
Maybe Carlos can get fucking three grand for the holidays and self-deport.
00:40:23
The Whole Ballgame
um maybe he's a cer Maybe he's a serviceman and he already got his $1,776 that'll pay for ah one car payment for most of these dipshits who are driving around a super truck.
00:40:23
uncleStinky
you see that, Gabe?
00:40:37
uncleStinky
the Did you see that that you can get extra money for the holidays? to leap I might do it if I can get three grand.
00:40:43
The Whole Ballgame
Yeah, all you got to do is... the Hey, man, if you want to send send my ass back to the Czech Republic... Where my ancestors came from, I'll take the three grand. What the hell
00:40:55
uncleStinky
don't if you get to choose, but I'd go pretty much anywhere if I could be alone.
00:40:58
The Whole Ballgame
hell? don't say that.
00:41:06
uncleStinky
No, that's that's what, that'd be nice.
00:41:08
The Whole Ballgame
Oh, you want that. Okay. All right.
00:41:11
uncleStinky
I mean, yeah, it'd kind of suck. I wouldn't want to be around all the other fucking deportees. But if they could just take me my own place somewhere and give me three grand, sure. It'd be fine.
00:41:28
uncleStinky
Yeah, sit down, Robin, you bitch.
00:41:41
uncleStinky
Fucking tailing away. Uh-oh. Z-fwa-ba-ba-ba. Z-fwa-ba-ba-ba. Are you typing the stuff that's popping up on the screen? Is that the noise I'm hearing?
00:41:57
The Whole Ballgame
No.
00:42:00
The Whole Ballgame
I'm sorry you're picking up the the clicking and clacking though.
00:42:00
uncleStinky
Z-fwa-ba-ba-ba.
00:42:02
The Whole Ballgame
I didn't realize.
00:42:06
uncleStinky
Sounds like Jake the Snake's over there eating a fucking ham and cheese sandwich.
00:42:21
The Whole Ballgame
yum
00:42:25
uncleStinky
Oh, dang, man, dude. I done went got myself all fucking hungry, dude.
00:42:31
uncleStinky
I'm just gonna eat some Chex Mix on the show for the next 45 minutes.
00:42:38
uncleStinky
Takes me about three days to get all the good pieces out of one of them big Sam's bags, man. And then it's just the shit pretzels, dude. I'll leave them for the little fucking girls.
00:42:53
uncleStinky
I like the rye chips, man. That's my favorite, dude.
00:42:58
The Whole Ballgame
Oh, you're talking about Bart Gardetto's over there?
00:43:01
uncleStinky
Yeah, dude. What the fuck? You think I'm just over running my dick licker talking about not talking about rye chips? I mean, god dang, dude. Come on, man.
00:43:13
uncleStinky
Dang.
00:43:19
uncleStinky
Hey, look, dude. i and Is that Wayne Brady, dude?
00:43:24
uncleStinky
Got it in.
00:43:29
The Whole Ballgame
looks Does Wayne Brady need to choke a bitch? God, what a great television program Chappelle's show was.
00:43:37
uncleStinky
You know, I believe that didn't Wayne come out as a pansexual?
00:43:44
uncleStinky
I read that.
00:43:51
The Whole Ballgame
I was reading the other day about Carlos Baerra nowadays and what he's up to. Mm-hmm.
00:43:57
uncleStinky
Oh, were you? Did you see that lady? Look at her. She's very aggressive. Clearly a lesbian.
00:44:04
The Whole Ballgame
Clearly.
00:44:05
uncleStinky
What's he up to, Gabe?
00:44:07
The Whole Ballgame
Well, it's interesting. he um I'll take it from here, Mr. Yocum. Who's this? who's It's been such a long time. Benito, how are you, sir?
00:44:19
The Whole Ballgame
Well, I'll tell you. I heard you mention Carlos's name, and I thought I'd come in and tell you a little story about Carlos and what he's been up to for the last few years.
00:44:30
The Whole Ballgame
Well, that's fine by us. went to What do you got? Well, each morning at precisely 9.17 a.m., Carlos glides across the marble floors of my Coral Gables mansion, and impeccably dressed in a linen suit that somehow still allowed for gold-glove caliber footwork.
00:44:52
The Whole Ballgame
He polishes silver with the same intensity he once brought to turning double plays, muttering to himself about proper placement timing and fundamentals.
00:45:03
The Whole Ballgame
He calls me Señor Santiago, you understand.
00:45:10
The Whole Ballgame
Every morning I wake up to Carlos shouting upstairs, Your cafecito is hot, your schedule is clear, and someone has once again moved the good rum.
00:45:23
The Whole Ballgame
It was me. i had several horrors last evening.
00:45:28
uncleStinky
Of course.
00:45:37
uncleStinky
Was that the end?
00:45:41
The Whole Ballgame
ah ah Basically, I'm not going to read any more of what ChatGPT spit out because it sucks.
00:45:47
uncleStinky
i Okay, I just wasn't sure. Kind of just abruptly, it was me.
00:45:49
The Whole Ballgame
Yeah.
00:45:51
uncleStinky
i had whores.
00:45:54
uncleStinky
Which makes sense.
00:45:59
The Whole Ballgame
Whether coordinating poolside domino games, arranging framed photos of impossible assists, or silently judging the angles of Santiago's trophy room, Bayerga ran the household with the quiet authority of a man who knew he could still hit 300 if called upon.
00:46:16
The Whole Ballgame
The neighbors whispered, the palm trees listened, and somewhere deep in the humid Miami air, the universe laughed because none of this ever happened, could never happen, and absolutely should not be believed.
00:46:16
uncleStinky
Oh.
00:46:28
uncleStinky
Oh, OK.
00:46:30
The Whole Ballgame
See, they have to throw that in so nobody gets sued, I would imagine.
00:46:34
uncleStinky
Well, that takes takes you right out of it.
00:46:36
The Whole Ballgame
Mm-hmm.
00:46:39
uncleStinky
It's like watching a John Cena match.
00:46:41
The Whole Ballgame
Carlos Bayerga was the best butler money could fictionally buy. Garbage. What you going to do? I bet you Grok wouldn't have to put all that shit in there, but that's because Grok's not woke, bro.
00:46:55
uncleStinky
I don't know. they i had to switch it up because those motherfuckers...
00:46:58
The Whole Ballgame
Oh, Jesus Christ. Yeah, the pictures.
00:47:01
uncleStinky
Yeah, i couldn't make real fucking people or whatever. and ay Who knows what the fuck's... Who gives a shit?
00:47:09
The Whole Ballgame
Blackjack walks another here.
00:47:16
uncleStinky
ah Jack Morris going tomorrow against Jason Beret.
00:47:22
The Whole Ballgame
Jason Beret. Jesus Christ. Look at that face. He looks like a... He looks like like a 17-year-old in high school who who shaves his face way up too high too early.
00:47:37
The Whole Ballgame
He doesn't have any hair coming in, but he just gives himself razor burn on his cheeks. You have any of those dipshits in your school? ah
00:47:44
uncleStinky
Not that I can think of. it doesn't really stick out to me.
00:47:46
The Whole Ballgame
and I worked with this i worked on real dipshit at Sears in the hardware department. His name was Joe Amato. Right. And he would come into work. He's one of those kids with like the, the, like the, the white blonde hair. Right.
00:48:03
uncleStinky
Ooh, an albino?
00:48:04
The Whole Ballgame
And no, no, just really fair complected. And he would come into work on Saturday morning and his cheeks are bright fucking red because it's clear he was shaving and he just gave himself razor burn, even though he didn't have anything to shave.
00:48:23
The Whole Ballgame
So we used to call him the tomato because his last name was a motto.
00:48:23
uncleStinky
What a
00:48:28
uncleStinky
Mm-hmm.
00:48:31
uncleStinky
What a piece of shit. Fuck him.
00:48:33
The Whole Ballgame
Fuck that guy. And then there was encore. We worked with a guy named encore as well. It was spelled a N K U R, but it's pronounced encore. And so every time I saw him, he'd walk in and I'd go for tasting more.
00:48:41
uncleStinky
Mm-hmm.
00:48:48
The Whole Ballgame
It's encore.
00:48:50
uncleStinky
So is he like a performance artist? Like one name, like Cher, Madonna, that kind of deal?
00:48:55
The Whole Ballgame
I don't remember his last name.
00:48:57
uncleStinky
Oh.
00:48:57
The Whole Ballgame
Rama, Rama Swathi or something like that.
00:49:00
uncleStinky
Oh, I got you. So he wasn't he wasn't doing art?
00:49:02
The Whole Ballgame
Yeah. Indian kid. No, no, no.
00:49:05
uncleStinky
He wasn't making music?
00:49:08
uncleStinky
Performing with his body?
00:49:09
The Whole Ballgame
See what I was doing there was, was talking about the encore family size entree.
00:49:16
uncleStinky
Yeah, I'm familiar with the the gravy slices, the Salisbury steaks, the lasagna I believe they have as well.
00:49:25
The Whole Ballgame
My headphones came unplugged, so I didn't hear anything you just said.
00:49:31
uncleStinky
Can you get them back on your head?
00:49:33
The Whole Ballgame
Okay, there we go.
00:49:34
uncleStinky
that better? It looked like it was harder than it should have been.
00:49:35
The Whole Ballgame
It is. Thank you.
00:49:39
The Whole Ballgame
It was. flah but but but but but but but but
00:49:41
uncleStinky
It's kind of like you had everything backwards for a few seconds and it took you a while to figure out. that, you know what, this needs to go the exact opposite way. Are you okay, Gabe?
00:49:57
The Whole Ballgame
what you just said described the last year and a half of my life.
00:50:05
uncleStinky
Oh, dude, tell me all about it, man.
00:50:09
The Whole Ballgame
Yeah. You're exactly the guy who I need to talk to. Thank you. Credence. I appreciate you.
00:50:15
uncleStinky
Come grab a seat on a limb, dude.
00:50:18
The Whole Ballgame
don't if you saw that. I am.
00:50:22
The Whole Ballgame
I threw that that hard, but it was all because I knew the strike was coming. And what I didn't want to have happen was for Kenny Lofton to die on this play because I threw the ball too hard.
00:50:33
The Whole Ballgame
I've lived that reality too many times to count. So i I threw it a little bit high so I could give him the base and not kill him and oh lead to the end of civilization as we know it. Because as you know, Kenny Lofton controls the locusts.
00:50:54
uncleStinky
We do know that. He's kind of got your number, Kark. He's two for two on the night. Sort treating you like a bitch.
00:51:03
The Whole Ballgame
Who's that? Kenny Lofton?
00:51:04
uncleStinky
Yeah. Second stolen base. He's two for two. He's only been on fucking twice.
00:51:10
The Whole Ballgame
Like I said, I've, I've, I had gone through this game hundreds of times already, hundreds of realities and, uh, every move I make is strategically done to ins ensure the continued survival of mankind.
00:51:27
uncleStinky
You know, I think you're a liar. That's what I think.
00:51:35
uncleStinky
Isn't every move we all make strategically done?
00:51:54
uncleStinky
Oh!
00:52:02
The Whole Ballgame
My goodness. i Look, we all know what indecent exposure is. And at 51 years old, you know, is what it is.
00:52:14
uncleStinky
My dick over here
00:52:14
The Whole Ballgame
But what exactly what exactly is extreme DUI, joe
00:52:23
uncleStinky
is like a regular DUI, but to the extreme.
00:52:34
uncleStinky
Over here.
00:52:35
The Whole Ballgame
It's this kind of scintillating sort of realism that we all hope for when you're around, Joey. I'm really thankful that, uh, that we can, we can counterbalance the, the, the craziness of a guy like Ron Karkavise with his crazy stories about time travel and,
00:53:00
The Whole Ballgame
you know, multiple realities when when we can have you really just breaking it down for us in every way, shape, or form.
00:53:10
uncleStinky
I got a couple magnets in my hand, Gabe. I'm playing with magnets over here.
00:53:17
The Whole Ballgame
How do they work?
00:53:18
uncleStinky
It's pretty fun. i don't know. They just do.
00:53:24
The Whole Ballgame
Mm-hmm.
00:53:26
uncleStinky
Maybe I'll blow myself up in some kind of computer thing.
00:53:30
The Whole Ballgame
Maybe just swallow two of those little guys and then we don't have to worry about you anymore.
00:53:35
uncleStinky
Hey, what if I put one in my mouth? And one in my ass. What would happen? Would they meet in my heart?
00:53:48
uncleStinky
Maybe my spleen? Or pancreas?
00:53:54
The Whole Ballgame
I don't know that there would be a direct way for them to reach your heart. Um,
00:54:03
The Whole Ballgame
But if there's a, yeah.
00:54:06
uncleStinky
What's the quickest way to a man's high?
00:54:11
The Whole Ballgame
I don't know, Joe, what, what, what?
00:54:14
uncleStinky
Allegedly shooting my wife in the face. Oh, bahia!
00:54:30
The Whole Ballgame
ah Here's Benito Santiago's butler, Carlos Baerga up.
00:54:38
uncleStinky
Carlos, do bring me my hey Wesley.
00:54:48
uncleStinky
Maybe I will, maybe I won't.
00:54:51
The Whole Ballgame
I don't know.
00:54:58
The Whole Ballgame
There we go. Streaks on the China never mattered before. ah you ah You and the family have big plans for Christmas? You going anywhere? Are you staying in the house and people coming to you?
00:55:11
uncleStinky
Oh, nice play by the ball girl. She's decent set tits on her, looks like.
00:55:18
The Whole Ballgame
and You got that that baggy T-shirt on, but you got it tucked into those shorts.
00:55:23
uncleStinky
You can see her tits jiggle when she moves.
00:55:23
The Whole Ballgame
Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. Love it.
00:55:25
uncleStinky
Tell you, no, you got a good pair.
00:55:27
The Whole Ballgame
Mm-hmm.
00:55:33
uncleStinky
Yeah, I don't know. ah
00:55:35
The Whole Ballgame
jesus christ
00:55:36
uncleStinky
Sure, we're going I we go to my mother-in-law's like always.
00:55:41
The Whole Ballgame
Yeah.
00:55:41
uncleStinky
ah i do the same goddamn thing. It's not it's not pleasant.
00:55:47
uncleStinky
It'll be fun watching the kids open their shit. and ah That's always good. but yeah After that, I'm
00:55:58
The Whole Ballgame
That's all it's got to be.
00:56:01
uncleStinky
just spending a lot of time doing shit I'd rather not be. Which, well, fuck, that's pretty much every day. so See, this is where you get rid of the expectations, Gabe.
00:56:14
The Whole Ballgame
Yeah, easier said than done there, pal.
00:56:20
uncleStinky
That's where you get me. I come in and I help you. I'm going to get you through this. I'm your silver fox, Gabe.
00:56:29
uncleStinky
It's me.
00:56:35
uncleStinky
Big sexy Gar Elliott.
00:56:36
The Whole Ballgame
Who? Oh, okay.
00:56:41
uncleStinky
I'm your silver fox. I'm going to lead you through these tough waters.
00:56:46
The Whole Ballgame
car Gar Elliott?
00:56:48
uncleStinky
Big sexy Gar Elliott. I'm no way a amalgamation of Kevin Nash, Sam Elliott, and any other man with silver fox hair.
00:57:01
The Whole Ballgame
The voice seems there's a little Gary Busey in there. Maybe that's where of the Gar goes in.
00:57:08
uncleStinky
Gar was the name of my character when I played that retard's dad on Mask.
00:57:16
The Whole Ballgame
Yes.
00:57:17
uncleStinky
Hey, Gar!
00:57:17
The Whole Ballgame
All
00:57:20
The Whole Ballgame
right.
00:57:20
uncleStinky
Yes, Rocky.
00:57:23
The Whole Ballgame
Cher was on Saturday night Live this weekend.
00:57:26
uncleStinky
Oh, Jesus.
00:57:28
The Whole Ballgame
Yep. She's 78 years old.
00:57:30
uncleStinky
was gonna say...
00:57:31
The Whole Ballgame
That's how old my dad was when he died.
00:57:37
uncleStinky
Yeah, you know, I've seen photos of your father. He and Cher look roughly the same.
00:57:42
The Whole Ballgame
You put them next to each other, they make a perfect 10.
00:57:48
The Whole Ballgame
That was a visual joke. It doesn't work in this medium, Yoakam. It's fine. Big hurt. Jumped for that bad boy and fell right on his face.
00:57:59
uncleStinky
it hurt.
00:58:00
The Whole Ballgame
Big.
00:58:03
uncleStinky
It's all one medium, too, by the way.
00:58:07
uncleStinky
As the magnets show you.
00:58:08
The Whole Ballgame
What's one?
00:58:12
uncleStinky
or two.
00:58:12
The Whole Ballgame
I'm 3XL, not a medium, so I don't know what you're talking about.
00:58:13
uncleStinky
How many teas?
00:58:20
The Whole Ballgame
3XLT if you're you want to get specific here.
00:58:24
uncleStinky
One or two.
00:58:26
The Whole Ballgame
Huh?
00:58:27
uncleStinky
damn.
00:58:29
The Whole Ballgame
ah Always do, come on. If you're going to do it, do it, do it, do it right.
00:58:34
uncleStinky
god damn
00:58:37
uncleStinky
see the size of that fucking leg brace on Omar Vizquel? That was massive.
00:58:43
The Whole Ballgame
That's right.
00:58:43
uncleStinky
Oh.
00:58:43
The Whole Ballgame
I need to make sure that my help is... The very best in protective equipment and the bigger the better, as you know.
00:58:52
uncleStinky
Oh, Omar works for you too, Benito.
00:58:55
The Whole Ballgame
Oh yeah, no, I just mixed up the two, that's fine.
00:58:57
uncleStinky
Yeah. yeah
00:58:58
The Whole Ballgame
Maybe yes, maybe no, I don't know.
00:58:59
uncleStinky
I didn't know if we were going to... Hey, there you go.
00:59:02
The Whole Ballgame
Yeah.
00:59:02
uncleStinky
Nice, nice.
00:59:05
The Whole Ballgame
Dear God. Oh.
00:59:09
uncleStinky
You tied it together.
00:59:11
The Whole Ballgame
The 1994 Major League season brought about two significant changes with regard to the makeup of each league's standings. Since 1969, the National American Leagues had used a two-division format, one east and one west, to accommodate the burgeoning expansion in the big leagues. The NL and AL had both grown by four teams since the AL began to swell in 1961.
00:59:36
The Whole Ballgame
Colorado Rockies and Florida Marlins, as we covered here, entered the NL in 1993, making the count 14 teams in each league. Realignment to three divisions in each league had been discussed for a few years.
00:59:51
The Whole Ballgame
In 1994, these conversations yielded results as a new central division was added. The second modification went hand in hand with the new division configuration. The additional division created a third champion and also made it necessary to add a wildcard team.
01:00:10
The Whole Ballgame
Postseason slots were now doubled, and now many clubs set a path to the playoffs with fewer obstacles. This format had been used by the NFL for so for many seasons beginning in 1970.
01:00:22
The Whole Ballgame
For Cleveland, the new alignment gave the Tribe some hope for a postseason berth. After years of futility, the Indians were now in a weight class that suited them with teams they could compete with.
01:00:34
The Whole Ballgame
Milwaukee, Chicago, Kansas City, and Minnesota. Gone were the days of immediate doom, conceding defeat to the powerful Red Sox, Yankees, Orioles, and Toronto Blue Jays in their old home in the East Division.
01:00:48
The Whole Ballgame
The White Sox had more success than Cleveland, but not much. They finished on top of the West in 1983 and 1993, but in both cases they were sent packing when they were eliminated in league championship series to Baltimore and Toronto, respectively.
01:01:05
The Whole Ballgame
As the second half of 1994 season began, the teams were separated by mere percentage points in the AL Central standings. Cleveland, 51-33, was a smidgen ahead of the Sox, who were fifty two and thirty four Both teams boasted powerful lineups and adequate pitching staffs to make their case as the favorite team. to finish atop of the division.
01:01:28
The Whole Ballgame
Cleveland opened the second half of the 1994 season with a four-game home set, excuse me, a four-game set against Chicago at Comiskey Park. The White Sox took the opener as Alex Fernandez beat Charles Nagy, and Chicago spotted Cleveland a three-run lead but scored two runs in each of the fifth, seventh, and eighth innings to claim the win. Tim Raines and Robin Ventura combined to go six for eight at the plate with three ah RBI.
01:01:54
The Whole Ballgame
The victory gave the White Sox their ninth straight win over the Indians at their home park. Cleveland had not won a game at Comiskey since September 9th, 1992. And that brings us to today's game. The pitching matchup for the second game. Mark Clark for col Cleveland. Jack McDowell for Chicago. Cleveland had acquired Clark from St. Louis.
01:02:15
The Whole Ballgame
and he was used as a starter and out of the bullpen by Mike Hargrove, the manager. This season, Clark was part of the starting rotation. McDowell, known as Blackjack to many, was the reigning AL Cy Young Award winner.
01:02:32
The Whole Ballgame
He was tops of the league in wins, leading the White Sox to their first division crown in 10 years. ah McDowell was pitching better of late, posting a 5-1 record in his last 10 starts in 94.
01:02:49
The Whole Ballgame
Can he... Cart get that one? Nope. Let it roll.
01:02:54
uncleStinky
God, what an ugly, ugly fucking man.
01:02:55
The Whole Ballgame
I'm telling you, i it it hit that girl hit that girl in the second second second row. a You notice how much I look like that that guy from Watchmen, right?
01:03:08
uncleStinky
Jackie Lee Haley?
01:03:10
The Whole Ballgame
Yeah, that's right.
01:03:13
uncleStinky
Also a baseball great, Kelly Leak.
01:03:22
uncleStinky
I'm going to go fuck myself.
01:03:23
The Whole Ballgame
Kenny Lofton led off the top of the first inning, got a board. When he bunted, we saw this. And then Albert Bell stepped in and Gene Lamont approached the plate, requested that Dave Phillips inspect the bat. Although...
01:03:37
The Whole Ballgame
er although
01:03:39
uncleStinky
El Presidente! Hey, Cat Daddy! It's me.
01:03:43
The Whole Ballgame
ah
01:03:51
The Whole Ballgame
Blackjack strikes out Eddie Murray here.
01:03:57
The Whole Ballgame
Phillips, who was the Empire crew chief, examined the bat with Joe Brinkman and said, i didn't see anything wrong with the bat, but we'll check it and send it on to the president, Dr. Bobby Brown.
01:04:12
The Whole Ballgame
And what what he decides to do is his prerogative.
01:04:16
uncleStinky
Nice. Yes. Fuck yes. I'm glad I didn't step on you.
01:04:24
The Whole Ballgame
I don't know if Gene was trying to play mind games with Albert or what, Hargrove said. Davey Phillips said he checked the bat, didn't see anything wrong, but he had to keep the bat regardless.
01:04:31
uncleStinky
Jesus.
01:04:34
The Whole Ballgame
If Gene got some information from somewhere, i think it's erroneous. And what ah what did our our friend Albert Bell say?
01:04:46
The Whole Ballgame
That's bullshit over here, Bell said.
01:04:50
uncleStinky
Hey, I don't appreciate it when you do that. i don't sound nothing like that. You sound like that over there.
01:04:58
The Whole Ballgame
Right.
01:05:02
uncleStinky
And i sound like this over here. It's Joey Butterfuga over here.
01:05:07
The Whole Ballgame
Fantastic.
01:05:09
uncleStinky
Not over there. Over here.
01:05:13
The Whole Ballgame
Unbeknownst to the 38,686 in attendance at the ballpark, as well as the players, umpires and ground crew, the real drama was unfolding behind the action. Hargrove was in the dugout with his head in his hands, and Indians relief pitcher, Jason Grimsley, asked bench coach Buddy Bell what was wrong.
Jason Grimsley's Daring Bat Swap
01:05:36
The Whole Ballgame
Bell told Grimsley there's a good chance that the bat was corked. Uh-oh.
01:05:42
uncleStinky
Oh, Kark drops one down the line.
01:05:44
The Whole Ballgame
There you He sure did.
01:05:46
uncleStinky
Is he going three?
01:05:47
The Whole Ballgame
Stand-up triple for Ron Karkweiss.
01:05:51
uncleStinky
Officer Karkavise, look at that.
01:05:52
The Whole Ballgame
I'd like you to understand that
01:05:55
uncleStinky
Yes, of course.
01:05:58
The Whole Ballgame
all that happens is because I allow it to happen.
01:06:02
uncleStinky
Uh huh. Thank you for allowing your triple.
01:06:08
The Whole Ballgame
You're welcome.
01:06:09
uncleStinky
Means a lot to me.
01:06:09
The Whole Ballgame
to
01:06:12
The Whole Ballgame
Grimsley told Bell he thought he could climb through the ductwork at Comiskey Park and get the ball back the bat back. Bell mentioned to Hargrove, who gave Grimsley the thumbs up.
01:06:26
uncleStinky
Wild.
01:06:26
The Whole Ballgame
It was a good possibility that all of Bell's bats were corked. sir
01:06:33
The Whole Ballgame
So Grimsley took with him a Paul Sorrento model to switch with the confiscated bat. Grimsley entered through the ceiling of the visiting manager's office, crawled through the ductwork to get to the umpire's dressing room.
01:06:46
The Whole Ballgame
It was not an easy venture for the six-foot-three pitcher to manage in an enclosed area.
01:06:52
uncleStinky
Just another diminutive guy.
01:06:53
The Whole Ballgame
It was pretty hairy up there.
01:06:57
The Whole Ballgame
Eventually, he crawled to where he thought was the umpire's room. There was a groundskeeper in there, sitting in there on a couch. I put the tile back down, but he had to know. Thank goodness he didn't say anything.
01:07:11
The Whole Ballgame
When he found his destination, Grimsley dropped into the room and made the switch. My heart was going a thousand miles an hour, he said. And on in I went. I just rolled the dice. Crapshoot.
01:07:26
The Whole Ballgame
Indians increased their lead two to nothing in the top of the third. the one out loft and walked, stole the second base.
MLB's Lenient Punishment Era
01:07:34
The Whole Ballgame
Vizquel also walked, and Carlos Baerga followed with a single to plate Lofton for a second ah RBI.
01:07:42
The Whole Ballgame
Schal got the run right back when Karkavice let off the bottom of the frame with a triple. We just watched here to right field and scored shortly thereafter. So there's some spoilers for you.
01:07:56
uncleStinky
Oh, you just watched him score right on time.
01:07:59
The Whole Ballgame
White, yep, there you go.
01:08:02
The Whole Ballgame
Ozzie Guillen followed with a ground out short.
01:08:08
The Whole Ballgame
White Sox slice a run off the lead and bottom of the seventh. Oh, blah.
01:08:16
The Whole Ballgame
After the game, the umpires knew right away that there was some something amiss when they saw the Sorrento bat. Major League Baseball investigated the incident, and the Indians coughed up the bat to security personnel from the MLB after the Indians hired ah an FBI agent to to to put on a special investigation and then threatened the Indians to that they would get the FBI involved it in full if they didn't make with the bat bat was x-rayed and then saw it open discovered that indeed there was a circle of cork in the fat part of the bat and bell was given a 10 day suspension and eventually it was lowered to seven days we talked about this before it boggles my mind that that was all that was levied there it was a he ended up getting a weak suspension for this
01:08:47
uncleStinky
Wow.
01:09:09
uncleStinky
Yeah, who gives a shit, right?
01:09:13
The Whole Ballgame
just really interesting to think about the world we live in today and what would happen there, especially in baseball.
01:09:23
uncleStinky
Yeah, you know, we gotta crack down on bullshit, right?
01:09:28
The Whole Ballgame
Yeah, apparently.
01:09:31
uncleStinky
It's, uh...
01:09:32
The Whole Ballgame
Cause it's, it's all it's life or death. You know, it's, it's not a game.
01:09:38
uncleStinky
Look, it's clearly made everything better from that point on, right?
01:09:42
The Whole Ballgame
It's good point. It's good point.
01:09:45
uncleStinky
We're not living in a shittier place than we were then, are we?
01:09:52
The Whole Ballgame
I'm pretty sure the last 10 seconds were shittier than the 10 seconds before those.
01:09:59
uncleStinky
It was debatable.
01:10:07
uncleStinky
Who's talking about Dr. Jack? Dr. Jack Fingers?
01:10:10
The Whole Ballgame
Well, i don't know.
01:10:12
uncleStinky
Oh, God. Dr. Jack Fingers on the show.
01:10:18
The Whole Ballgame
I'll tell you this right now. I enjoyed my time with Wimpy.
01:10:25
uncleStinky
Didn't we all?
01:10:27
The Whole Ballgame
This is just... You
01:10:31
uncleStinky
Wimpy will leave you with a smile, that's for sure.
01:10:35
The Whole Ballgame
yeah you know, a few times that we hung out in Arizona, I always had a good time with with Tom Petruik. We drank some beers and It's funny, petoric is a word that we use in the in the church for, as we we call a turnip, a petoric.
01:10:58
uncleStinky
Is it? Is that what you do?
01:10:59
The Whole Ballgame
Yeah, it's a petoric. It's not turnip, rotten turnip, loosely translated Latin to petoric. Mm-hmm.
01:11:06
uncleStinky
Oh, we yes. That's interesting.
01:11:09
The Whole Ballgame
Yeah, I thought you might appreciate that, yeah.
01:11:12
uncleStinky
Oh, I appreciate the fuck out of it, Bob. Thank you.
01:11:17
The Whole Ballgame
Yeah, you know, I'm here. am the police. You know, I could never could have climbed.
01:11:21
uncleStinky
How's your Christmas looking?
01:11:23
The Whole Ballgame
I never could have climbed through the ductwork at Comiskey. You know, I don't even know I climbed through ductwork at any of the ballparks. He's pretty big guy, but that guy was six foot three.
01:11:33
uncleStinky
Mm-hmm.
01:11:34
The Whole Ballgame
He must have been real skinny, huh? Grimsy?
01:11:36
uncleStinky
yeah Yeah, I don't think he could climb through much.
01:11:39
The Whole Ballgame
You're a diminutive guy, then, you know. Can he be diminutive if he's just skinny, or does he got to be skinny and short? Oh, my goodness.
01:11:47
uncleStinky
think that I think I think the big part about being diminutive is being short.
01:11:48
The Whole Ballgame
Yeah.
01:11:54
The Whole Ballgame
It's an interesting thought of perspective there. i would have gone the other direction. I thought, you know, if there're a they're six foot three and they're real super, super skinny. I would call them diminutive just because their stature isn't, you know, the opposite of diminutive.
01:12:12
uncleStinky
Well, it makes me feel good about myself that I chose the exact opposite way that you would have went. So we at least got that.
01:12:21
The Whole Ballgame
Can you tell me how tall you are again there, there, midget boy? Hey,
01:12:24
uncleStinky
No, and I'm 5'7", but I'm happy that I don't think like you is what I was saying.
01:12:30
The Whole Ballgame
you're in panic, you're just, you know, just be alright.
01:12:34
uncleStinky
Yeah, that's right, Bob. Thank you. how long have you been dead now?
01:12:39
The Whole Ballgame
Oh, I didn't hear on the program. don't know when that was. It was over a year ago.
01:12:46
uncleStinky
A year or so, huh?
01:12:46
The Whole Ballgame
it bu before My goodness, before for the other guy or you'd had his heart taken out. ah
01:12:55
uncleStinky
So this will this won't be your first Christmas as a dead man.
01:12:55
The Whole Ballgame
Gosh.
01:12:58
The Whole Ballgame
maybe maybe Maybe June or July that year. so yeah No, this will be second check full Christmas. He's a dead guy. Yeah.
01:13:04
uncleStinky
nice. Congratulations.
01:13:06
The Whole Ballgame
Yeah. I mean, look, at the end the day, people think it's such a bad thing, but it's a bad rap, you know being around Every once in while you get chosen to be the ah the ghost of the present or pastor, and if you you know, yet to come.
01:13:22
The Whole Ballgame
a i always i always like past or present because I don't like ever being the ghost of Christmas yet to come, you know. i really you know
01:13:30
uncleStinky
Oh, yeah, I gotcha.
01:13:33
The Whole Ballgame
So, you know, we all get to get a chance to be part of the play and You know, I still can read, you know, and Anton and I have have really great parties.
01:13:43
uncleStinky
Oh, that's good.
01:13:46
The Whole Ballgame
and The nice thing about Afterlife is is teleportation, you know, you can just kind of show up wherever it is. ah You can't really feel nothing or nothing.
01:13:58
The Whole Ballgame
So there ain't no feeling. i don't get hungry anymore, which, you know, that's hard. But, you know, as a fat guy, i like my food.
01:14:05
uncleStinky
is
01:14:08
The Whole Ballgame
You put something in your mouth here, it just falls right on the floor. You know, so.
01:14:12
uncleStinky
I heard i heard food food is just fuel.
01:14:16
The Whole Ballgame
i do yeah orange so You can we make an argument for that, I suppose. It's kind of like the way you think about it. And you're getting state of mind.
01:14:31
uncleStinky
Sure, yeah. It seems like it'd make it easier to to not miss it so much.
01:14:34
The Whole Ballgame
Well, I'll tell you what, you know, I was going to say, beer is one thing, but especially this time of year, you know what miss the most?
01:14:43
uncleStinky
ah Hand jobs.
01:14:43
The Whole Ballgame
Eggnog.
01:14:44
uncleStinky
Oh.
01:14:45
The Whole Ballgame
Yeah, yeah.
01:14:46
uncleStinky
Oh, that's gross.
01:14:47
The Whole Ballgame
I'll tell you what, i was just listening to the program a couple weeks ago, he said that Coca-Cola stuff tastes like eggnog now. And I thought, well, would be a nice delight. I'd like to try eggnog Coke.
01:14:58
uncleStinky
I don't think anybody said that but you.
01:15:02
The Whole Ballgame
It wasn't me, it was him, the other guy.
01:15:04
uncleStinky
He's You're him.
01:15:07
The Whole Ballgame
Cuckoo-ca-choo. All right. I am the walrus. It's ah Mark Clark in now. Or somebody's up there anyway.
01:15:15
uncleStinky
The fuck you talking? Paul Sorrento.
01:15:17
The Whole Ballgame
Whatever. Oh, you know.
01:15:18
uncleStinky
Mark bart Clark's the goddamn pitcher.
01:15:20
The Whole Ballgame
Sure. Paul Sorrento's in, and he this is this that's the that's the bat they swapped with.
01:15:24
uncleStinky
He's the one.
01:15:27
uncleStinky
Yeah.
01:15:28
The Whole Ballgame
Albert's there.
01:15:29
uncleStinky
Well, there's your problem because his fucking bat's a totally opposite color.
01:15:32
The Whole Ballgame
Completely different color. Yep.
01:15:34
uncleStinky
I'm sure they took one of the other ones, hopefully. but What a what a story.
01:15:37
The Whole Ballgame
Hey,
01:15:42
The Whole Ballgame
this man's got the chin of a young Joey Buttafuoco.
01:15:48
uncleStinky
But he is not over here He's over there.
01:15:55
uncleStinky
believe he's a... Paul's former Minnesota twin. He was a rookie.
01:16:03
The Whole Ballgame
he's got that He's got that Swedish sort of look to him.
01:16:04
uncleStinky
Yeah,
01:16:08
The Whole Ballgame
And you know me, i know the Swedes.
01:16:10
uncleStinky
it's a very silly boy.
01:16:14
uncleStinky
the Paul was a rookie on the 91 Twins when they played the Braves in the World Series.
01:16:22
uncleStinky
I just watched that Game 7 like a week ago.
01:16:31
The Whole Ballgame
wi Wimpy just said, don't we have a larger word than big for those guys?
01:16:37
uncleStinky
Wimpy's such a...
01:16:38
The Whole Ballgame
Talking about the bears.
01:16:40
uncleStinky
He's such a fucking twink.
01:16:42
The Whole Ballgame
He really is, right? Thank goodness.
01:16:45
uncleStinky
He's like an old man twink.
01:16:45
The Whole Ballgame
You know, one guy plays around in your asshole and this is what happens to him.
01:16:53
uncleStinky
Are you sure it's just one?
01:16:55
The Whole Ballgame
I don't know. I'm not sure of anything.
01:16:59
uncleStinky
One night in Bangkok. That's what they say.
01:17:02
The Whole Ballgame
Mm-hmm.
01:17:05
The Whole Ballgame
You know, papa Papa's very ah very fond of the ladyboys these days. Not in a sexual way, just out of curiosity.
01:17:13
uncleStinky
What does that even mean?
01:17:16
The Whole Ballgame
Papa. um
01:17:17
uncleStinky
No, I understand the pop part.
01:17:18
The Whole Ballgame
papa howard Papa Howard talks a lot about ladyboys on the program.
01:17:22
uncleStinky
Right.
01:17:23
The Whole Ballgame
Mm-hmm.
01:17:24
uncleStinky
Is this a specific, like, a Thailand thing?
01:17:24
The Whole Ballgame
He gets...
01:17:27
uncleStinky
or like ah are we just talking transgender in general?
01:17:30
The Whole Ballgame
No, the no, no, no, the Thailand kid, those like the actual, you know, the stuff that pre, you know, yeah.
01:17:37
uncleStinky
Right. So, okay. Okay.
01:17:39
The Whole Ballgame
the He finds it fascinating because, you know, he talks about if you tried to pay him a hundred million dollars to be able to tell whether, you know, who was, who was who or what was what he wouldn't be able to.
01:17:54
uncleStinky
Yeah,
01:17:58
The Whole Ballgame
So he finds it fascinating. It's very clear, obviously, for himself that there's not a sexual element to it, just a curiosity, which, you know, ah could be true, could be intellectually dishonest.
01:18:09
The Whole Ballgame
I don't know.
01:18:12
uncleStinky
yeah who knows? I mean, I understand the point. I i get it.
01:18:17
The Whole Ballgame
course.
01:18:18
uncleStinky
Very hard to distinguish, but... um It is a myth, apparently, because I didn't even know this until I had to look it up and read. But, you know, that it's not like a um
01:18:35
The Whole Ballgame
Thank you.
01:18:35
uncleStinky
there's a larger acceptance or like trans population or whatever in Thailand than somewhere like everywhere else, really. It's kind of like it seems like it's pretty much in line or at least what I had read. Yet this is a very, obviously it's a thing. I mean, if you know Papa's talking about it and making, you know, that's why Von Ericks were always flying over there, I'm sure.
01:19:02
The Whole Ballgame
What I would imagine, and I could be very wrong about this, but i because I haven't really dug into the the research the things people have covered on this, but i eat from the you know we talk about late-stage capitalism all the time. In my head, it's it's an economic decision, right? you have You have enough folks come over as tourists interested in that sort of thing, and the market creates itself and evolves over time and grows.
01:19:32
The Whole Ballgame
you know there's a high demand for that sort of thing, then the supply shows up because it's about the money.
01:19:42
uncleStinky
Why does the supply show up when the supply is all from there?
01:19:47
The Whole Ballgame
No, no, The supply of potential customers, the people searching that out.
01:19:50
uncleStinky
Oh. Yeah, I gotcha. I don't know, man. Everybody's just trying to come.
01:19:59
The Whole Ballgame
That's it. It's all about coming.
01:20:02
uncleStinky
Look at all the messes in the world. You can reverse engineer them all back to coming.
01:20:05
The Whole Ballgame
who
01:20:11
The Whole Ballgame
I mean, we talked about the Archduke a little earlier.
01:20:14
uncleStinky
Yeah, sure. Naturally. The sluts, right?
01:20:21
The Whole Ballgame
So many sluts.
01:20:26
uncleStinky
Paul O'Neill leading the league.
01:20:30
uncleStinky
And, you know, speaking, Gabe, of ah you talked about the three divisions.
Anticipating Reds vs. Astros
01:20:36
The Whole Ballgame
Mm-hmm.
01:20:36
The Whole Ballgame
Yep.
01:20:36
uncleStinky
In the National League Central, we have a heated race.
01:20:41
uncleStinky
between the Cincinnati Reds and the Houston Astros, which that will be our our next ball game. We'll be going to...
01:20:49
The Whole Ballgame
That's right.
01:20:49
uncleStinky
rip We'll be going to Riverfront for the Reds and the Astros on on Baseball Night in America.
01:20:49
The Whole Ballgame
We're coming right. I forgot. Yeah.
Will Deion Sanders Appear?
01:21:00
The Whole Ballgame
we We get to, yeah I'm i'm ah i only making an assumption here, but I think I might be right. Do we get Deon Sanders for the first time here?
01:21:11
uncleStinky
Well, I mean, we we had Dion in then his football form.
01:21:16
The Whole Ballgame
Well, sure yeah.
01:21:18
uncleStinky
Did you forget about me, Mr. Gabe? Come on now.
01:21:21
The Whole Ballgame
like I could never. I could never. Some of our listeners, though some of our listeners, some of our listeners were not, were not privy to that.
01:21:24
uncleStinky
Mr. Randy Watson.
01:21:28
uncleStinky
Yeah, they don't.
01:21:31
The Whole Ballgame
ah And if they wanted to be, how might they experience Deion Sanders on the whole ballgame if they wanted the football version of said human?
01:21:31
uncleStinky
Mm-hmm.
01:21:44
uncleStinky
that yeah we we took a look at the prime time ah and the two legit to quit falcons and we had to go out and outsource the talent to play d on and because we just couldn't do it justice and we got reverend brown from coming to america not the actual eddie murray but uh murphy sorry we got eddie murray in the ball game uh but we could only afford reverend brown so but we could afford the entire Joey Buttafuoco for this one.
Patreon and Exclusive Content
01:22:15
uncleStinky
So thank you for that. But that would be a patrion.com slash the whole ball game.
01:22:25
The Whole Ballgame
I'll tell you what, the the, the, the, you know, we have to pimp this stuff a little bit more so you people understand exactly what you're missing, but we've, we've, we've, we've developed um this sort of short form.
01:22:34
uncleStinky
I totally forget about it. We never do.
01:22:45
The Whole Ballgame
uh, content, I guess, as much as it pains me to say that word out loud, but, uh, we call them foul balls. And, uh, these, these dipshits we have rolling around in our heads, oftentimes we'll take control of our recording devices or phones and, and just create magic.
01:23:05
The Whole Ballgame
Uh, the most recent one, I believe you've was from, Somebody in your head, right? Yeah, you put you put something up there the other day.
01:23:17
The Whole Ballgame
What was it? Was it Jimmy? No.
01:23:20
uncleStinky
I don't know. Once I'm done with it, it's gone forever.
01:23:23
The Whole Ballgame
Yeah, that makes sense. ah I know Jimmy recently did one, ah you know, talking about his missing megaphone, which he did get back, everybody.
01:23:34
The Whole Ballgame
He did get the microphone but megaphone back. so is Oh, yes, that's right.
01:23:36
uncleStinky
Oh, we had ah RFK saving the fat boys.
01:23:40
The Whole Ballgame
Yep, that was it. Yep.
Retiring with Patreon Savings?
01:23:43
The Whole Ballgame
RFK is, uh, out there to save the fat boys. So if that interests you, Jimmy interests you, if any of our dipshit ideas interest you, uh, you should probably head over there to patreon.com slash the whole ball game and, you know, make it so that, uh, Blake and I can save,
01:23:54
uncleStinky
I think.
01:24:11
The Whole Ballgame
$20 a month a piece and eventually retire to the Dominican Republic.
01:24:20
uncleStinky
Maybe yes, maybe no.
01:24:23
The Whole Ballgame
I don't know.
01:24:24
uncleStinky
You know, as I look at it...
01:24:24
The Whole Ballgame
Maybe, maybe Haiti.
01:24:27
uncleStinky
Yeah, that sounds good. As I look at it now, you know, there's 51 foul balls in there. 11 Charlie News Networks. Five story time with credences.
01:24:40
uncleStinky
And then we have seven stolen goods, which is just random shit that I find humorous that I'll share from the internet.
01:24:40
The Whole Ballgame
Oh yeah.
01:24:48
uncleStinky
And the one of one, Harry at home.
01:24:53
The Whole Ballgame
I haven't done another one of those, have Harry just ah recorded a little bit while he was emptying the dishwasher.
01:25:03
The Whole Ballgame
And ah it goes, I think it's about 11 minutes long. It goes well off the rails.
01:25:09
uncleStinky
Yeah, and that's in addition to the additional shows we do that are not baseball.
Other Shows and Nostalgia
01:25:16
uncleStinky
Like ah we talked about the the Saints and the Falcons ah wildcard weekend from 91.
01:25:24
uncleStinky
my My first is falling in love with football for the first time.
01:25:32
The Whole Ballgame
We watched ah the pilot to different strokes together for our fans on Patreon.
01:25:38
uncleStinky
Yeah, Marvin.
01:25:40
The Whole Ballgame
Yep. Talk a little about Martin Marvin and his love of black midgets or young black boys. We're not sure, you know, when we don't judge um unless he's a pedophile and then fuck that guy.
01:25:56
The Whole Ballgame
But we're not sure.
Fitness Updates with DDP
01:25:58
The Whole Ballgame
But.
01:25:58
uncleStinky
You also have your entire phone call with DDP on there.
01:26:02
The Whole Ballgame
Oh, yes. Yeah, that's the other piece, right? Yeah, I should probably update him. It's been almost a year since I talked to him, and he told me to call him and update him every month on whether I was still a fat boy. um And I am, just not as fat as I was.
01:26:19
The Whole Ballgame
ah But, yeah, ah you can hear you can hear the the grift come out of Dallas' own mouth. over there on the Patreon as well. It's ah it's a good one.
01:26:33
uncleStinky
I bet you that he knows how many months it's been since you haven't called. He's not going to call you or check himself, but he's made notes so he can regain and fuck you and make sure you know that you're a bitch.
01:26:45
The Whole Ballgame
Correct.
01:26:47
uncleStinky
in
01:26:47
The Whole Ballgame
What will happen is I'll call him back and he'll let it go to voicemail and I'll leave him a voicemail and he'll call me back and he'll go, bruh, you're not dead?
01:27:00
The Whole Ballgame
you didn't You're not dead yet? That's pretty good. You know, it's been 11 months since I heard from you.
01:27:05
uncleStinky
Mm-hmm.
01:27:06
The Whole Ballgame
Mm-hmm.
01:27:08
uncleStinky
He'll go back and check the last message or phone or
01:27:10
The Whole Ballgame
He put tally marks. Yeah, exactly. Tally marks. he's He's got notes on everybody.
01:27:14
uncleStinky
Dally marks. Dally marks.
01:27:16
The Whole Ballgame
Tally marks. There it is. fuck We got there, by God.
01:27:17
uncleStinky
Yes.
01:27:21
uncleStinky
Nice.
01:27:25
uncleStinky
No, but the Cincinnati and and Houston will will be taking a look at Jeff Bagwell and...
MVP Contenders: Jeff Bagwell
01:27:34
uncleStinky
And we'll probably have to see what we can scrape together to get another guest star for the the big dog of the Reds. None other than Kevin Mitchell, baby.
01:27:47
uncleStinky
BMF for himself.
01:27:51
uncleStinky
And I think I got a guy lined up.
01:27:57
The Whole Ballgame
Let's see.
01:27:59
uncleStinky
That he's going to cost us.
01:27:59
The Whole Ballgame
look at this roster real quick.
01:28:01
uncleStinky
Oh yeah.
01:28:02
The Whole Ballgame
See again. Hmm.
01:28:02
uncleStinky
I said, but he's going to cost us. Um, yeah, that fucking reds team is monstrous. The bagwells bagwell is going to win the fucking MVP. So that's really the, the, the division race and that, and that's kind of the story there. But, um, I'm pretty sure that reds teams like collective batting average is something like, like two 90 fucking two or something like that.
01:28:31
uncleStinky
Like, The entire team's damn near batting 300. Yeah.
01:28:43
The Whole Ballgame
Brett Boone, Jeff Branson, Tony Fernandez, Willie Green, Lenny Harris, Barry Larkin, Hal Morris, Roberto Kelly, Kevin Mitchell, Dion, Jerome Walton.
Cincinnati-Atlanta Trade
01:28:59
The Whole Ballgame
Jesus.
01:29:00
uncleStinky
Yeah, Kelly gets traded for Dion. That's the swap with Atlanta.
01:29:07
The Whole Ballgame
Oh, I see. Yeah, I was looking at the roster from that year.
01:29:11
uncleStinky
Whenever that trade happens, don't know, a couple months in the season, I think.
01:29:20
The Whole Ballgame
What I always find funny is
01:29:28
The Whole Ballgame
you can almost always tell by the name whether or not they're going to have a kisser.
01:29:35
The Whole Ballgame
Case in point, I don't remember this man at all, but of the the Reds roster in 1994, what name do you think I would have clicked on thinking, oh, I bet this guy's got a got got a kisser on him
01:29:35
uncleStinky
Yeah.
01:29:54
uncleStinky
Hal Morris.
01:29:56
The Whole Ballgame
Nope. Chuck McElroy.
01:29:59
uncleStinky
Mm hmm. Yeah, Chuck's got glasses, doesn't he?
01:30:02
The Whole Ballgame
Yeah, see that. And that's a thing. You know, it's it's a it's it might be vaguely racist. I'll put that out there. But get a black guy with with glasses on, especially wire rim glasses.
01:30:15
The Whole Ballgame
And there's just like a level of.
01:30:21
The Whole Ballgame
This guy looks like a real nerd.
01:30:27
The Whole Ballgame
He played for a lot of teams, though.
01:30:29
uncleStinky
Well, I think those glasses do that to anybody. Nobody looks cool.
01:30:34
The Whole Ballgame
I don't think so. I don't look like a nerd.
01:30:34
uncleStinky
Nobody looks cool in wire-rimmed glasses, man.
01:30:37
The Whole Ballgame
Oh, and wire rims? Yeah, that's a good point. The hoes. The hoes looked good.
01:30:45
uncleStinky
Oh, yeah. That's true. Thank you, Gabe.
01:30:47
The Whole Ballgame
ah Cubs. wi Cubs, White Sox, Phillies, Reds, Orioles, Rockies.
01:30:57
uncleStinky
What are you doing? Just reading baseball teams?
01:31:00
The Whole Ballgame
No, no, no. That's who Chuck McElroy played for all those teams.
01:31:02
uncleStinky
Oh, okay. Goddamn. This fucking show's really devolved.
01:31:08
The Whole Ballgame
It really has. Jesus Christ.
01:31:11
uncleStinky
Cardinals. Cubs. Pirates. Brewers.
01:31:18
The Whole Ballgame
Savannah bananas.
01:31:18
uncleStinky
Astros. Oh, no. That hurts. Banana ball.
01:31:26
The Whole Ballgame
Dear God in heaven.
01:31:28
uncleStinky
ah It's all going to hell.
01:31:28
The Whole Ballgame
We're all in big, big trouble.
State of Arts and Society
01:31:33
uncleStinky
Yeah, would do you when you look at everything, it's just so goddamn problematic.
01:31:33
The Whole Ballgame
Carlos. pierga
01:31:38
uncleStinky
for Like, all the arts, like, where it's all heading, the... We're fucking everything up.
01:31:51
The Whole Ballgame
Arts and farts.
01:31:56
uncleStinky
it God damn it. They're going to Saudi Arabia for WrestleMania. like We just have completely went past the point of pretending to to give a fucking shit about anything.
01:32:12
The Whole Ballgame
I didn't tell you. we We haven't talked about much of anything. I'm ah pretty sure I will be in Las Vegas this April.
WrestleCon Plans in Vegas
01:32:22
uncleStinky
Hey, look at you.
01:32:23
The Whole Ballgame
not for Not for WrestleMania, though.
01:32:25
uncleStinky
got a B&B? oh
01:32:27
The Whole Ballgame
russ ah We might end up in an Airbnb, but no. We're probably going to do WrestleCon for pro wrestling tees. So I've got to be in town for that.
01:32:38
uncleStinky
What do you mean not for WrestleMania you'll clearly that's the real reason you're there
01:32:43
The Whole Ballgame
Well, yeah, but we're selling shit somewhere else. I won't go to WrestleMania.
01:32:47
uncleStinky
now
01:32:47
The Whole Ballgame
I'm not going to pay that kind of money. If you're not going, I'm not splurging. You know, I care about you, Blake, is what I'm saying. Merry Christmas.
01:32:56
uncleStinky
You're Sterling, not Splurgeon.
01:33:02
uncleStinky
Get it?
01:33:08
uncleStinky
What was that one guy's name? Spurgeon? Spurgeon Wynn? that senator?
01:33:13
The Whole Ballgame
Yeah, that's what I thought of when you said that word.
01:33:14
uncleStinky
still Seems like somebody Bob Cottle would have worked with when he was working with Jesse Helms.
01:33:16
The Whole Ballgame
I was like, wait a second, I know that from somewhere. Now I got to look it up.
01:33:26
uncleStinky
Let's not talk about that when we talk about how nice a guy Bob Cottle is. The fact worked for one of the most racist fucking politicians ever.
01:33:33
The Whole Ballgame
He was, yeah, he was like, um he was like his chief of staff. He didn't just work for him. He was like the guy.
01:33:41
uncleStinky
that's right, boss. He's a real...
01:33:46
The Whole Ballgame
Charles Spurgeon was a British preacher, author, pastor, and evangelist.
01:33:51
uncleStinky
that's right. I heard my...
01:33:53
The Whole Ballgame
Closeness to God.
01:33:54
uncleStinky
That's it, yes.
01:33:56
The Whole Ballgame
Dilemma and deliverance.
01:33:59
uncleStinky
I heard my dad's daughter talk about him before. That's it. that That fucking huckster.
01:34:04
The Whole Ballgame
That's your sister.
01:34:06
uncleStinky
Nah, she's not my sister.
01:34:10
The Whole Ballgame
She's your dad's daughter. She's your sister.
01:34:12
uncleStinky
Nah. It's
01:34:13
The Whole Ballgame
Okay. All right.
01:34:17
uncleStinky
a half-sibling.
01:34:19
The Whole Ballgame
I have one of those. Her name's Penny.
01:34:24
uncleStinky
Penny Lane, she's in my house.
01:34:27
The Whole Ballgame
you know you know You know, Penny is is one of those. she's a She's an archetype. a penny Penny Patton. penny yeah
01:34:41
The Whole Ballgame
Penny's about five feet tall. That's not an exaggeration. She's about five feet tall. She weighs about 375 pounds.
01:34:49
uncleStinky
Oh, wow.
01:34:51
The Whole Ballgame
Um, she's 14 or 15 years older than I am. As you know, my father and mother were 18 years apart and, ah he was, I think I've told the story on the program before.
01:35:02
uncleStinky
Uh-huh.
01:35:06
The Whole Ballgame
I don't know if I have, but, um, my dad lived next to my mom and her family. And he lived with his wife who was whoring herself out at the truck stop in town.
01:35:19
uncleStinky
Mm-hmm.
01:35:20
The Whole Ballgame
And he found out about it and ah he had been convinced that he was sterile by his wife at the time ah to the point even that they adopted and Penny was adopted.
Family Secrets and Relations
01:35:33
uncleStinky
uh-huh
01:35:34
The Whole Ballgame
So he was, she was his from adoption with, with his ex. And he found out that he was in fact not sterile when the 19 year old girl that lived next door to him got knocked up with my brother.
01:35:49
The Whole Ballgame
before she graduated high school. So, so ah
01:35:58
The Whole Ballgame
Penny, ah yeah, about 15 years older than me and maybe more.
01:36:03
uncleStinky
Yeah.
01:36:04
The Whole Ballgame
I'm not really sure. But she's that woman who um ah we all have one of these in our life that ah no matter what the occasion, no matter no matter the reason for the gathering, everything is about Penny and Penny's problems.
Penny's Family Discussions
01:36:25
The Whole Ballgame
Right. ah Last time I saw Penny was at a funeral. And the entire time that I saw her, hadn't seen her in three or four years. It was about how bad her back hurts and how she needs to sit down or else she's going to go into a spasm and end up in the hospital.
01:36:43
The Whole Ballgame
I mean, and I'm talking about 20, 25, 30 minutes of the same story going around and around and around and and it always, you know,
01:36:56
The Whole Ballgame
Well, this happened to me and then my back and then, you know, I have this, this, uh, like this myalgia or this fake brain pain, right?
01:37:04
uncleStinky
yes yes it's always the fibromyalgia yes yes yes
01:37:05
The Whole Ballgame
Like that always the fiber. Yeah. Right. Uh, but yeah, that's, that's, uh, that's Penny. That's my half sister. Um, the only thing Penny ever did for me that was worth a shit was she took me to, uh, see back to the future, uh, part two at the movie theater.
01:37:24
uncleStinky
oh oh wow always comes back to back to the future for you oh nice
01:37:26
The Whole Ballgame
Yep.
01:37:28
The Whole Ballgame
Fucking A. See the DeLorean's up there, too. He's right there. Yeah. Now to retire the side.
01:37:38
uncleStinky
ah Oh, man. Penny, penny, penny. Well, of course she for fucking back hurts.
01:37:42
The Whole Ballgame
any Penny, penny, penny.
01:37:45
uncleStinky
She's I'll tell her. Oh,
01:37:47
The Whole Ballgame
Thank you very much. And God forbid somebody say that.
01:37:53
uncleStinky
i'll tell her
01:37:54
The Whole Ballgame
i I know you would. I know you would. God bless you.
01:38:00
The Whole Ballgame
See if I can find a picture of Penny and I'll send it to you. It might end up being the wallpaper for this episode.
01:38:04
uncleStinky
god
01:38:09
uncleStinky
I still like the sticker of the one girl.
01:38:13
The Whole Ballgame
Which one girl?
01:38:15
uncleStinky
i don't even know who it is. The one that's just looking back so disapprovingly at the camera. Looks like she's got a wig on and big glasses. It's funny.
01:38:27
uncleStinky
I know you disapprove of it though, so I don't send it to you.
01:38:30
The Whole Ballgame
Hey, I don't know what the hell you're talking about.
01:38:31
uncleStinky
Okay, I'll send it to you and we can go back down and rehash this.
01:38:36
The Whole Ballgame
sounds good to me. I'll do it in character. It'll be great.
01:38:40
uncleStinky
Yeah, yeah, pretty sure like twice you like oh no don't do that But I'll do it Her face is funny it makes me laugh
01:39:01
uncleStinky
That one I See I told you motherfucker exact reaction
01:39:04
The Whole Ballgame
Come on, man.
01:39:12
The Whole Ballgame
Although what's kind of funny about that is she kind of looks like Penny.
01:39:15
uncleStinky
Yeah, see, the whole thing's funny. I know what I'm...
01:39:17
The Whole Ballgame
she's she's She's lost about 150 pounds since that picture was taken, too.
01:39:20
uncleStinky
I know what I'm doing, dude.
01:39:23
The Whole Ballgame
So that's nice.
01:39:25
uncleStinky
I'm fucking in sync, brother.
01:39:31
uncleStinky
Jack! Did you hear that?
01:39:35
The Whole Ballgame
I did. There she is. Oh dear god.
01:39:42
The Whole Ballgame
Get real kick out of this shit.
01:39:44
uncleStinky
Ugh.
01:39:50
The Whole Ballgame
Broken bat, little looper. Two down.
01:39:55
The Whole Ballgame
Where you at? There you are. Okay. There comes. There you go. Say hi, Penny.
Penny's Spouse Dynamics
01:40:19
The Whole Ballgame
There only some games left for that one.
01:40:23
uncleStinky
Is she with Macho Man?
01:40:26
The Whole Ballgame
She's not. that's a Well, my dad called him George. His real name is Kevin.
01:40:31
The Whole Ballgame
Well, that's the guy that she ended up marrying after her abusive ex.
01:40:31
uncleStinky
No.
01:40:37
uncleStinky
He looks kind of abusive himself.
01:40:41
The Whole Ballgame
Yeah, i wouldn't it wouldn't surprise me one bit.
01:40:45
uncleStinky
I mean, are you going really marry a 5'375 pound woman if you can't beat the shit out of her every now and then?
01:40:52
The Whole Ballgame
I mean, no.
01:40:55
uncleStinky
Penny Lane, you're in my heart. You're in my backhand.
01:41:05
uncleStinky
It's the fifth inning and this cocksucker is talking about a late arriving crowd.
01:41:10
The Whole Ballgame
My back hurts. It's a my fibromyalgia is acting up spanky. Wimpy. I mean, wimpy.
01:41:21
uncleStinky
Spank it, Whippy.
01:41:22
The Whole Ballgame
See, I mixed up the little rascals and Popeye.
01:41:31
The Whole Ballgame
He's got himself a 3-1 lead.
01:41:37
The Whole Ballgame
So, Comiskey, this is old Comiskey. No, it's not. This is the new one.
01:41:42
uncleStinky
Wow, that's new one.
01:41:43
The Whole Ballgame
Never mind. Yeah. hu Dipshits.
01:41:48
uncleStinky
Yep, yeah, they really shit the bed with that. You can't even tell the difference. Brand new fucking stadium.
01:41:58
The Whole Ballgame
Hi and inside.
01:42:01
uncleStinky
Only the White Sox.
01:42:05
The Whole Ballgame
Yeah, they signed that Japanese guy. Everybody seems really excited about it. and i sent you that clip. Did you see that?
01:42:12
uncleStinky
I that did not.
01:42:15
The Whole Ballgame
Yeah.
01:42:15
uncleStinky
So Taguchi?
01:42:17
The Whole Ballgame
Nope.
01:42:18
uncleStinky
oh
01:42:19
The Whole Ballgame
oh White Sox.
01:42:22
uncleStinky
You know what do you know so Taguchi used to be on the Cardinals?
01:42:26
The Whole Ballgame
Yeah, I remember the name.
01:42:27
uncleStinky
In the 2005 playoffs. He integral part. and i would run around also two thousand and four i suppose And I would go, so what?
01:42:43
uncleStinky
So to Gucci.
01:42:46
The Whole Ballgame
Perfect.
01:42:48
The Whole Ballgame
Mune Takamurakami, Japanese slugger.
01:42:55
The Whole Ballgame
Chicago White Sox general manager Chris Goetz calls Munitaka Murakami, one of the most prolific power hitters on the planet, expects the 25-year-old Japanese slugger to make an immediate impact on his rebuilding of the team next season.
01:43:08
The Whole Ballgame
White Sox and Murakami agreed to a two-year, $34 million dollars contract. Not sure what Reinsdorf thought about this, but I'm sure he's got some things to say.
01:43:19
The Whole Ballgame
The video that I sent you has him on on camera telling and the fans that they can just call him Mune.
01:43:27
The Whole Ballgame
Like Mercedes Mune.
01:43:34
uncleStinky
Uh-oh, that's what I wanted...............................
01:43:36
The Whole Ballgame
Oh, listen to this. Hold on.
01:43:38
uncleStinky
cool back
01:43:38
The Whole Ballgame
Hold on before you do that.
White Sox Sign Mune Takamurakami
01:43:43
The Whole Ballgame
Perfect. It should be a humdinger. Left-handed batting corner infielder launched 56 home runs in 2022 to break Sudaharu
01:43:59
The Whole Ballgame
record for a Japanese born player in the Nippon professional baseball league while becoming the youngest player to earn Japan's triple crown. Uh, we learned of course about Sadaharu Oh in our episode that highlighted, uh,
01:44:17
The Whole Ballgame
Bob Horner.
01:44:23
uncleStinky
Sataharo, oh no.
01:44:29
uncleStinky
Let's get a beer.
01:44:29
The Whole Ballgame
Did I tell you that I talked to Sonny Ono on the phone?
Sonny Ono and Wrestler Deals
01:44:34
uncleStinky
Maybe.
01:44:35
The Whole Ballgame
Because we were we were planning on booking Muda or Naito. And now that Naito is not in New Japan anymore,
01:44:46
The Whole Ballgame
ah Sonny Ono is his North American representation. And he wanted us to lock him in and send him 50% of their pay immediately.
01:45:00
uncleStinky
Sounds like a good deal.
01:45:03
The Whole Ballgame
Do you know how I responded to Sonny?
01:45:05
uncleStinky
oh no.
01:45:06
The Whole Ballgame
Oh, no.
01:45:08
uncleStinky
Good. He deserves that. Well,
01:45:12
The Whole Ballgame
Yeah. Socks down, too. They're in trouble, according to Hawk.
01:45:17
uncleStinky
why can't you just give the guy half his money?
01:45:21
The Whole Ballgame
Well, it's not his money. It's their money.
01:45:25
uncleStinky
Well, they were or he works for them, right?
01:45:28
The Whole Ballgame
That's what he says.
01:45:30
uncleStinky
You telling me that you think Sonny Ono's fucking Tetsuya Naito out of some money?
01:45:35
The Whole Ballgame
Yes.
01:45:36
uncleStinky
ha ha ha
01:45:39
The Whole Ballgame
ah He's fucking so so so so sa ah Naito. as I don't know what the fuck that was.
01:45:46
uncleStinky
ha. Ha ha ha ha
01:45:48
The Whole Ballgame
Jesus Christ.
01:45:50
uncleStinky
ha.
01:45:50
The Whole Ballgame
ah
01:45:50
uncleStinky
Ba ba ba ba ba. Oh no, dude.
01:45:54
The Whole Ballgame
ah Naito, Great Muta, and Jushin Thunder Liger.
01:45:58
uncleStinky
ah no they
01:45:58
The Whole Ballgame
He represents all of them here in the United States. And yeah, I'm reasonably sure he's taken a great deal of money from all three of those men.
01:46:09
uncleStinky
I don't seem like Sonny Ono to me, dude.
01:46:12
The Whole Ballgame
No. Oh, no.
01:46:14
uncleStinky
Oh, no.
01:46:15
The Whole Ballgame
ah
01:46:16
uncleStinky
I'll never tell.
01:46:18
The Whole Ballgame
Sonny. Ah, he's a great guy. He's a great guy. He understands story, man.
01:46:24
uncleStinky
Oh, I thought that was Don Teriyaki for a minute.
01:46:27
The Whole Ballgame
No, no, no.
01:46:29
uncleStinky
Same dude, kind of just different ethnicity.
01:46:35
uncleStinky
Man.
01:46:35
The Whole Ballgame
You know, as I sit here on my porch and I watch the sunset in Montana, I'm reminded of my time with Sonny in Minnesota.
01:46:38
uncleStinky
Yeah.
01:46:43
The Whole Ballgame
What a great guy he was, is, you know, Sonny actually still lives in Minneapolis.
01:46:45
uncleStinky
Yeah, yeah.
01:46:52
uncleStinky
Big in the political scene up there. Yeah,
01:46:55
The Whole Ballgame
Nah, man. Nah, this isn't about politics. Nah.
01:46:59
uncleStinky
what is, right?
01:47:03
uncleStinky
Nothing's about politics, right, Eric?
01:47:04
The Whole Ballgame
That's the, that's the weak. That is the weakest excuse I've ever heard. I, I hear it all the time. It's all, oh, cause of politics. Nothing's actually politics, man.
01:47:16
The Whole Ballgame
ah
01:47:17
uncleStinky
No?
01:47:18
The Whole Ballgame
This makes me sick.
01:47:20
uncleStinky
I think everything's politics.
01:47:21
The Whole Ballgame
What do you hear that from Meltzer? What do you hear that from Meltzer?
01:47:25
uncleStinky
No, I heard it from Richie Sambora.
01:47:33
The Whole Ballgame
I don't like rock and roll music.
01:47:36
uncleStinky
Okay.
01:47:38
The Whole Ballgame
This is a full.
01:47:42
uncleStinky
I'm sorry you don't like rock and roll music. I guess that means we just fucking discount it.
01:47:50
The Whole Ballgame
Correct. You finally you're catching on
01:47:53
uncleStinky
Yeah, yeah.
01:47:55
The Whole Ballgame
What a businessman this guy is.
01:47:55
uncleStinky
Oh
01:47:56
The Whole Ballgame
My goodness.
01:47:59
uncleStinky
oh yeah, I got the receipts to show it.
01:48:04
The Whole Ballgame
I don't save any of my receipts.
01:48:07
uncleStinky
Yeah, that seems probably good for you. you in trouble.
01:48:10
The Whole Ballgame
Wasteful. I've only been bankrupted three times. No big deal.
01:48:14
uncleStinky
All right.
01:48:17
uncleStinky
Gabe, Gabe's saving his Powerball receipts. Did you win the billions?
Powerball Daydreams
01:48:21
The Whole Ballgame
Ah, fuck. I knew I forgot something. God damn it. It's Monday.
01:48:26
uncleStinky
Surely you can buy it sure you can buy a ticket online now, right?
01:48:26
The Whole Ballgame
Hopefully.
01:48:29
uncleStinky
And there's some kind of app.
01:48:30
The Whole Ballgame
You can't. You can't. You can't. I don't. like I can't do it.
01:48:34
uncleStinky
No?
01:48:35
The Whole Ballgame
I don't know why.
01:48:36
uncleStinky
Well, it's probably smart you don't.
01:48:37
The Whole Ballgame
Yeah, it it rolled over to today. It was.
01:48:39
uncleStinky
Oh, dude, there's Spanky.
01:48:39
The Whole Ballgame
ah
01:48:42
uncleStinky
Spanky LaValier.
01:48:44
The Whole Ballgame
Oh, nice.
01:48:52
The Whole Ballgame
Believe that's that he's in your arsenal. Let's see here. The winning numbers tonight, 3, 18, 36, 41, 54 with Powerball 7. Let's see here. 1.6 billion tonight. 735.3 million cash value if you just take it all once.
01:49:07
uncleStinky
Oh man, those are exactly my numbers.
01:49:15
The Whole Ballgame
see here
01:49:18
The Whole Ballgame
one point six billion tonight
01:49:20
uncleStinky
That would be fine.
01:49:21
The Whole Ballgame
seven hundred and thirty five point three million in cash value if you just take it all at once
01:49:27
uncleStinky
Yeah, that sounds fine.
01:49:30
The Whole Ballgame
Yeah, I'd build a compound. That's what I would do.
01:49:36
The Whole Ballgame
Somewhere centrally enough located, none of you fuckers would ever have to to to work again. take take We'd take care of Molly, we'd hire some tutors.
01:49:48
The Whole Ballgame
Man, it'd be hell of a thing.
01:49:51
uncleStinky
It sounds like you're just trying to lock me inside a fucking compound and not let me out. ah So, I don't know about that. But, uh, yeah. Yeah.
01:50:01
The Whole Ballgame
You know those guys in Oregon where the ah the feds raided their they're compound?
01:50:01
uncleStinky
Uh.
01:50:05
uncleStinky
Oh, yeah.
01:50:05
The Whole Ballgame
and
01:50:06
uncleStinky
Hey, is that Princess Di?
01:50:06
The Whole Ballgame
Yeah.
01:50:11
The Whole Ballgame
Jesus Christ.
01:50:13
uncleStinky
Oh, she's choking the kid. You fucking cunt. Look at that bitch. She definitely likes it in the ass.
01:50:18
The Whole Ballgame
Look at her. We can only hope.
01:50:23
uncleStinky
Big Hurts smokes one in Omar.
01:50:30
The Whole Ballgame
There is ah no indication as to whether and any anybody won. We should know in the next hour or so whether or not somebody actually won tonight. If not, it'll roll into Christmas Eve, and the jackpot will be about the same as it was when I was there in Missouri with you and the boy back in September, and that was $1.787 billion.
01:50:58
uncleStinky
What a haul.
01:51:01
The Whole Ballgame
Yeah.
01:51:02
uncleStinky
I would, ah
01:51:02
The Whole Ballgame
Somebody in Missouri won. ah just was Someone in Missouri and someone in Texas split it.
01:51:15
The Whole Ballgame
White Sox cap brought to you by our friends at Insure won the gift at the ball game this weekend.
01:51:23
uncleStinky
I think if I won, I'd go to work for like three days. And then quit.
01:51:27
The Whole Ballgame
Yeah.
01:51:30
The Whole Ballgame
ah like dramatically or just kind of just walk in a day and be like, Hey, I, uh,
01:51:34
uncleStinky
Oh, no, no. i'd be like, you know, at first off, I'd make sure everybody knew I won
01:51:40
The Whole Ballgame
yeah.
01:51:40
uncleStinky
And then I'd just kind of walk around and fuck with people. And then, oh no.
01:51:44
The Whole Ballgame
Would you give Dave any money?
01:51:46
uncleStinky
And then then by the time, you know, just whenever I got bored with it, I'd just like probably flip them off and
01:51:46
The Whole Ballgame
Okay.
01:51:56
uncleStinky
Maybe light an Undertaker symbol on fire out back or something. And say, fuck
White Sox Wives' Quilt
01:52:03
uncleStinky
y'all. And head out.
01:52:04
The Whole Ballgame
Not a cross. An Undertaker symbol?
01:52:06
uncleStinky
Yeah, yeah.
01:52:07
The Whole Ballgame
Got it.
01:52:08
uncleStinky
Because that's what we did back in the day. So um I might have to do that.
01:52:11
The Whole Ballgame
White Sox wives put together a quilt there, Blake.
01:52:15
uncleStinky
Oh, that's great. That looks like a real sack of shit.
01:52:20
The Whole Ballgame
It's a lot of work, Wimpy has to say.
01:52:22
uncleStinky
Yeah, well, you know...
01:52:24
The Whole Ballgame
Darren Jackson's wife was ah the lead on that bad boy.
01:52:28
uncleStinky
Who's the gay man in the middle of the wives?
01:52:28
The Whole Ballgame
And maybe he is a goon. Yeah.
01:52:32
uncleStinky
That's the question.
01:52:32
The Whole Ballgame
That's Carlos Baerga's houseboy.
01:52:35
uncleStinky
I don't think so. That's the White Sox wives. It's Darren Jackson's boyfriend, I bet.
01:52:39
The Whole Ballgame
Oh.
01:52:44
uncleStinky
Maybe it's yours, Kark.
01:52:49
The Whole Ballgame
comment
01:52:51
uncleStinky
That's right. You did tell us about your escapades with many men and women.
01:53:01
The Whole Ballgame
When you exist wholly outside of time,
01:53:04
uncleStinky
Yeah.
01:53:07
The Whole Ballgame
what's important to remember is that sex is a construct just like anything else.
01:53:13
The Whole Ballgame
Sexuality even is a construct.
01:53:15
uncleStinky
Sure.
01:53:15
The Whole Ballgame
it just
01:53:16
uncleStinky
Yeah.
01:53:16
The Whole Ballgame
It's just whatever you believe it to be. It's not a it's not real. everything is Everything is fake. Isn't that the way that you live your life?
01:53:27
uncleStinky
Well, I think i know what sex is and I'm pretty sure it's real.
01:53:34
The Whole Ballgame
No, I didn't say sex. I said sexuality.
01:53:36
uncleStinky
Well, at first you said sex.
01:53:38
The Whole Ballgame
Shut up.
01:53:39
uncleStinky
I wasn't sure.
01:53:41
The Whole Ballgame
I said shut up.
01:53:42
uncleStinky
oh Wally?
01:53:45
uncleStinky
You in there?
01:53:47
The Whole Ballgame
Move on.
01:53:47
uncleStinky
Oh, okay.
01:53:48
The Whole Ballgame
Yeah.
01:53:48
uncleStinky
Good job.
01:53:50
The Whole Ballgame
All right. Well, what are you going to How's this new microphone sound, by the way?
01:53:56
uncleStinky
Sounds great. I'm glad you got it.
01:53:57
The Whole Ballgame
That's wonderful.
01:53:58
uncleStinky
Yeah.
01:53:58
The Whole Ballgame
Yeah. I, uh, my other one broke. Um, well it's been broken for some time and I thought it was the cord.
01:54:04
uncleStinky
right right because you'd move it yeah
01:54:05
The Whole Ballgame
It was actually the inside of the fucking, the, the, the thing on the back end, the little plug it was, that was broken. Um, and I missed, uh, by a month and a half, I, uh, I missed the, uh, the geek squad replacement bullshit. So I had to buy a new fucking microphone.
01:54:27
uncleStinky
that's too bad
01:54:30
The Whole Ballgame
You know what? I don't i don't think you're you're being sincere. Mm-hmm.
01:54:34
uncleStinky
I'm nothing but...
01:54:38
uncleStinky
You know, it sounds so good. I think maybe, you know, maybe more people start giving us money and we can do more shows.
01:54:45
The Whole Ballgame
That would be that'd be really good if they would do that, especially this time of year where you know we're on here talking about how I'm going to spend more money on Powerball tickets because I need the money.
01:54:45
uncleStinky
Because...
01:54:54
uncleStinky
Oh, dude. It's Beavis and Butthead.
01:54:56
The Whole Ballgame
That's Beavis.
01:55:00
The Whole Ballgame
Oh, yeah.
01:55:01
uncleStinky
They're being escorted out, I think.
01:55:03
The Whole Ballgame
It looked as though that were the case. There you go
01:55:07
uncleStinky
Only Comiskey.
01:55:10
The Whole Ballgame
Well, I mean, I don't think those two were the ones that ran onto the field and beat up an old man, but it could very well be.
01:55:18
uncleStinky
That'd be something.
01:55:22
uncleStinky
Beat the shit out of Tom Gamboa.
01:55:24
The Whole Ballgame
Gamboa, that's it was. Yep.
01:55:26
uncleStinky
Hey, there's Jose De Leon.
01:55:29
The Whole Ballgame
Number 48 in your programs.
01:55:29
uncleStinky
form Former Cardinal.
01:55:31
The Whole Ballgame
Number one in your heart.
01:55:39
The Whole Ballgame
Robin Ventura.
01:55:43
The Whole Ballgame
Former White Sox manager, former ah New York Met, Robin Ventura.
01:55:51
uncleStinky
former Oklahoma State Cowboy.
01:55:57
The Whole Ballgame
Former Nolan Ryan punching bag.
01:56:03
The Whole Ballgame
Ho! Inside for a ball.
01:56:12
uncleStinky
Forever uncool Robin Ventura.
01:56:16
The Whole Ballgame
This Clark character is a good pitcher, huh? Is he still in there? Is that still him?
01:56:21
uncleStinky
It is Yeah, he was a decent prospect I remember when he came up with the Cardinals and then he's doing well here
01:56:22
The Whole Ballgame
Yeah. 10 and three on the season. He's.
01:56:41
uncleStinky
he said dinger
01:56:42
The Whole Ballgame
He's full four for seven with a dinger. Oh, maybe that's who that was. Maybe that was ah Wimpy's
01:57:00
The Whole Ballgame
assaulter. Maybe that's who that guy with the mustache was around the Chicago wives.
01:57:06
uncleStinky
oh
01:57:06
The Whole Ballgame
His boyfriend or perp.
01:57:09
uncleStinky
Yes. Assaulter slash boyfriend.
01:57:10
The Whole Ballgame
perp
01:57:18
The Whole Ballgame
Look at this we're getting It's getting interesting here, Blake.
01:57:21
uncleStinky
Look. It's late in the game. The pitcher's getting tired. We gotta get the bullpen up. There's...
01:57:27
The Whole Ballgame
Derek Lilliquist is up in the bullpen, along with Jose Mesa.
01:57:28
uncleStinky
ah yeah Lefty. That's a couple of kissers right there.
01:57:39
uncleStinky
The aforementioned Buddy Bill.
01:57:44
The Whole Ballgame
Manuel in there as well. It's the bench coach eventually. Charlie Manuel. No, that's Jerry Manuel. Never mind.
01:57:53
uncleStinky
Jerry Manuel's on the White Sox.
01:57:53
The Whole Ballgame
There's Darren Jackson. Uh-huh.
01:57:55
uncleStinky
Charlie Manuel is the hitting coach of the Indians.
01:57:59
The Whole Ballgame
Darren Jackson's standing in now. Looks like a bit of a goon if you ask me.
01:58:04
uncleStinky
I'm telling think the guy at the stash is with Darren.
01:58:11
The Whole Ballgame
Oh, that's the end of the inning. Darren Jackson fucks it all up for everybody. And we head to the bottom of something or other.
01:58:18
uncleStinky
No, that was a sacrifice bullet.
01:58:21
The Whole Ballgame
okay. Well, there you go.
01:58:22
uncleStinky
Yeah, fucking idiot.
01:58:23
The Whole Ballgame
Same difference. Same same difference. It doesn't really matter. I know how this ends.
01:58:28
uncleStinky
a Yeah, sure, I know. You've been through fucking time and space.
01:58:35
The Whole Ballgame
ah No, no, no. That's me. The Hawk has not been through time and space.
01:58:41
uncleStinky
Who can keep straight? Uh-oh.
01:58:46
uncleStinky
What the fuck is this bullshit?
01:58:53
The Whole Ballgame
this. wa you i no know a native wound up dying
01:59:00
uncleStinky
Lance Johnson grounds out and that'll be all for the White Sox as this inning comes to an end. Oh no, wait, they scored a run.
01:59:07
The Whole Ballgame
like ah Like I said, Lance Johnson fucks it up for everybody.
01:59:15
uncleStinky
You know Lance is a former Cardinal as well.
01:59:18
The Whole Ballgame
Yeah, Lance was more of a journeyman than I knew when he was playing for the White Sox. I wasn't paying enough attention to the rest of the league. I didn't realize he bounced around the way that he did.
01:59:30
uncleStinky
Got Warren Newsome on deck. Seems like a good time for me to go take a piss.
01:59:35
The Whole Ballgame
sounds great. ah Blake will be right back here on the whole ball game.
Christmas Carol Humor
01:59:41
The Whole Ballgame
Well, he's gone.
01:59:41
uncleStinky
gonna keep on dancing true.
01:59:42
The Whole Ballgame
I'm going to sing you all a little song.
01:59:47
The Whole Ballgame
Nah, I was just kidding. I'm not going play a song for you. Well, I'm glad you mentioned that, Gabe. I'll sing a song for these people. What song do you all want to hear?
01:59:59
The Whole Ballgame
Okay, let's see if I can find that one in my in my app here.
02:00:12
The Whole Ballgame
oh where's that oh where you going here you go okay well it's that time of year folks and and i'm here and after gabe goes to bed at night you know he leaves the christmas lights on in the living room so i i'm uh i'm bathed in the the kind light of the Christmas holiday season. And so I figured I'd, I'd sing, uh, sing y'all little tune that, uh, that's near and dear to my heart. Oftentimes we would sing this one, um, while we were juicing the girls around Christmas time. So,
02:00:49
The Whole Ballgame
Here we go. Oh, come all ye faithful, joyful and triumphant. Oh, come ye, oh, come ye to Bethlehem.
02:01:06
The Whole Ballgame
Come and behold him, born the king of angels. O come, let us adore him. O come, let us adore him. O come, let us adore him. him Christ the Lord. And now the little known second verse.
02:01:28
The Whole Ballgame
oh God of God, light of light. Lo, he abhors not the virgin's womb.
02:01:40
The Whole Ballgame
Very God, begotten, not created. Sing, choirs of angels, sing in exultation. Sing, all ye citizens of heaven above, glory to God in the highest.
02:02:00
The Whole Ballgame
You know, I can't, I don't really know if I'm saying this right. So, ah you know, I'm trying to make it sound the same, but I don't have the music in front of me, just the lyrics.
02:02:11
The Whole Ballgame
So I just wanted to get it as right as I could for y'all. I know it'd be in that time of year, so. We'll wrap it up here with the third one. Yea, Lord, we greet thee. Born this happy morning.
02:02:25
The Whole Ballgame
Jesus, to thee be glory given. Word of the Father. Now in flesh appearing. Oh, come let us adore him. Oh, come let us adore him.
02:02:45
The Whole Ballgame
Oh, come let us adore him. him Christ the Lord. oh here he is. I was singing a little little little Christmas tune for him there, Blakers.
02:02:58
uncleStinky
That's great. Thank you, Rick. I'm sorry.
02:03:00
The Whole Ballgame
Yeah.
02:03:00
uncleStinky
like i had to stop and get some animal crackers for Jimmy, baby.
02:03:03
The Whole Ballgame
I got it. I got them. i got them. I got, there's a, there's a second verse here. The third verse came back to life and sounded right. But like the second verse goes, God of God, light of light.
02:03:16
The Whole Ballgame
Low, he abhors, not the virgin's womb. Very God begotten, not created. So I don't know if I sang it right or not, but I told him that was a song that we used to sing around Christmas time while we was juicing them girls.
02:03:36
uncleStinky
Well, it's awful festive of you guys.
02:03:39
The Whole Ballgame
Oh, come let us adore him. You know, we're praising God and coming. It's all really good.
02:03:47
uncleStinky
Staying faithful.
02:03:49
The Whole Ballgame
Mm-hmm.
02:03:54
uncleStinky
Glad to have you racked, Rick.
02:03:54
The Whole Ballgame
that might be That might be a fun fun set of ah foul balls is is our our guys all singing ah singing Christmas carols on the Patreon for the holiday season. So, yeah, in the next couple of days here, still more sleep, still Christmas, folks.
02:04:12
The Whole Ballgame
ah Maybe we'll ah we'll sing some some Christmas carols. i bet bob I bet you Bob has a hell of a... ah ah repertoire singing Christmas carols, you know, as dedicated to the Dark Lord as he is.
02:04:31
uncleStinky
know, Jimmy used to sing quite a bit. hadn't been care for that, though.
02:04:37
The Whole Ballgame
Keep on dancing, baby. feel like Jingle Bells from Jimmy Hart sounds about right.
02:04:43
uncleStinky
There's probably seven or eight Jimmy tracks in the foul balls.
02:04:47
The Whole Ballgame
Dashing through the snow. an a one-horse open sleigh. O'er the fields we go. Laughing all the way.
02:04:59
uncleStinky
You big Christmas music guy, huh, Rick? I think he's crying now. hard
02:05:07
The Whole Ballgame
go underneath the couch.
02:05:09
uncleStinky
Yeah, I think so.
02:05:10
The Whole Ballgame
I miss Beth.
02:05:12
uncleStinky
Yeah, that bitch.
02:05:20
The Whole Ballgame
Roberto or Sandy? That's Sandy, right?
02:05:22
uncleStinky
That is.
02:05:26
uncleStinky
Roberto is more diminutive in spits.
02:05:29
The Whole Ballgame
Sandy says, Sandy says, or Hawk says, he's really hitting the ball well.
02:05:38
uncleStinky
You know, it's a baseball, man. That's talk. Eighth inning and Blackjack's still in there.
02:05:47
The Whole Ballgame
Well, you know, in a game this close where ah where you know one crack of the bat could change the change a course of the ballgame, you hate to give give a guy like Blackjack, who's struggling a little bit at this point in the season, but, you know, has got a lot of quality starts in a row here.
02:06:08
The Whole Ballgame
Got to give him every opportunity to win the game if he's he' was anywhere close. You know, we owe him that much for the for grabbing us to Cy Young last year.
02:06:18
uncleStinky
We? who Do we? Who's we?
02:06:21
The Whole Ballgame
Yeah, I reckon it's we. It's we. It's us. You know, I, as part of the team at this time, 1994, I was 11. um It was important to me to give Blackjack the benefit of the doubt on everything.
02:06:37
uncleStinky
Is this you? Are you talking as Gabe? i it sounds like you're doing a little It sounds like you're doing a little accent, but then you talked about being 11,
02:06:41
The Whole Ballgame
I don't know. I'm really confused. was... there's certain there was
02:06:51
The Whole Ballgame
fat little 11 year old girl.
02:06:54
uncleStinky
Oh, brother, what? What's happening?
02:07:02
The Whole Ballgame
Ask Creedence. He'll understand.
02:07:04
uncleStinky
Oh, dang, dude, not me, man. I'm off for the holidays, dude. You know what I'm saying? Dick liquor clothes, dudes. Oh, man.
02:07:16
The Whole Ballgame
You know, Creedence, I saw some pictures the other day on that, uh, that info dump on, uh,
02:07:18
uncleStinky
um dude, wouldn't be...
02:07:22
The Whole Ballgame
the Department of Justice website looked an awful lot like you, pal.
02:07:24
uncleStinky
Oh, dude, no. I can't get on that plane, man.
02:07:31
The Whole Ballgame
Oh, fuck.
02:07:37
The Whole Ballgame
I saw that leisure wear, that multicolored striped leisure wear, and you on the the beach with that drink in your hand. I saw it.
02:07:45
uncleStinky
and did I didn't say nothing about no boat.
02:07:52
The Whole Ballgame
You know all the bullshit aside, that man,
02:07:57
The Whole Ballgame
to avoid having to fly to Chicago, rented a bus, a tour bus, to bring him to Chicago from but from from Huntsville for Star Class 5, maybe, whatever it was.
02:08:02
uncleStinky
Oh, fuck.
02:08:11
uncleStinky
Oh, he's gotten so fat.
02:08:11
The Whole Ballgame
he rendered a rented a fucking tour bus.
02:08:16
uncleStinky
Oh, he's not flying. So he can lay in bed. God damn, that's awesome.
02:08:26
uncleStinky
It's amazing that you can walk around with the fucking look down on people shit. and And you're so goddamn fat, you gotta to take a your fucking bus because you can't hop on plane.
02:08:40
uncleStinky
And then he tried to spin it to you like he he preferred that. Oh man, no.
02:08:44
The Whole Ballgame
that He absolutely did.
02:08:45
uncleStinky
It ain't like that, dude.
02:08:46
The Whole Ballgame
you um man, you know, it ain't like, ah you know, I could fly first class all I wanted to, and I'd be fine, I guess. But would would you rather just just work and do your job and and and be in the lap of luxury, or do you want to go through the TSA nonsense and this and that and the other thing and all the rigmarole?
02:08:55
uncleStinky
But you don't want to.
02:09:08
The Whole Ballgame
No, man, I'll just rent the bus.
02:09:11
uncleStinky
Yeah, no. Now fuck all that rigmarole.
02:09:12
The Whole Ballgame
I mean, like you can't take it with you.
02:09:13
uncleStinky
Uh-huh.
02:09:14
The Whole Ballgame
can't take it with you
02:09:15
uncleStinky
Yeah, fuck all that. Fuck that rigmarole. And let let's take the option that it takes takes four more.
02:09:20
The Whole Ballgame
Oh.
02:09:23
uncleStinky
Hey, Alvaro Espinosa.
02:09:27
The Whole Ballgame
That is a kisser.
02:09:28
uncleStinky
Maybe yes, maybe no. Utility infielder, Gabe.
02:09:34
The Whole Ballgame
I don't know can't say it. Hello, my name is Alfredo Aspinosa.
02:09:40
uncleStinky
Alvaro.
02:09:40
The Whole Ballgame
I am very happy. It's fine. There's a bit of a um but the distinctive of the like language barrier.
02:09:52
uncleStinky
Sure, yeah.
02:09:53
The Whole Ballgame
Alvaro, Alvarado is the same word.
02:09:54
uncleStinky
think he's French.
02:10:02
The Whole Ballgame
my French. ah
02:10:04
uncleStinky
Ha ha ha ha! Ha ha! Ha ha! Ha ha
02:10:08
The Whole Ballgame
Oh, I think we found our loophole here at Blaker's.
02:10:11
uncleStinky
Ha ha ha!
02:10:12
The Whole Ballgame
Oh, yes, we have.
02:10:12
uncleStinky
Ha ha
02:10:14
The Whole Ballgame
Avaro Espinoza.
02:10:15
uncleStinky
Ha ha ha!
02:10:15
The Whole Ballgame
Look at my goggles.
02:10:16
uncleStinky
Ha ha ha!
02:10:16
The Whole Ballgame
Oh, I like cheese and champagne.
02:10:18
uncleStinky
Ha ha ha!
02:10:21
uncleStinky
Suck IMU!
02:10:28
The Whole Ballgame
Have you ever seen the movie with the little rat who makes the food with the man's hair? He pulls the hair. or that is what I like the best.
02:10:41
The Whole Ballgame
jesus christ
02:10:43
uncleStinky
I can't confirm this, but...
02:10:48
uncleStinky
I think this is not the first time on the show you've ever asked me if I've seen the movie with the little rat. what she eats It just feels like it's happened before.
02:11:04
uncleStinky
but there's no no way to figure out, like, because there's nothing logically.
02:11:13
The Whole Ballgame
Oh dear God.
02:11:16
uncleStinky
What's the last thing we talked about that Ratatouille could possibly come up in?
02:11:17
The Whole Ballgame
Wonderful.
02:11:25
The Whole Ballgame
i mean, maybe one of, one of, one of, uh, uh, one of the, um, one of the recipes or something.
02:11:38
uncleStinky
it's something to do with cooking.
02:11:38
The Whole Ballgame
um
02:11:40
uncleStinky
Maybe
02:11:41
The Whole Ballgame
Jesus Christ almighty.
02:11:44
uncleStinky
Marvin. Who knows?
02:11:48
uncleStinky
Best to not think about it this late.
02:11:51
The Whole Ballgame
Probably not.
02:11:57
uncleStinky
Maybe Donnie will know.
02:12:06
The Whole Ballgame
Strike on the outside corner.
02:12:10
uncleStinky
Clark's still in as well. Both starting pitchers still going here in the bottom of the eighth. 3-2 Cleveland.
02:12:18
The Whole Ballgame
ah regular pitcher's duel here.
02:12:22
uncleStinky
This is what you live for. I mean, well, not you don't live for it, but like this is gone. It didn't happen anymore, you know? This is a big part of the fucking game.
02:12:37
uncleStinky
You got the hitter and you got the pitcher. You got the starting pitcher and now that's gone.
02:12:43
The Whole Ballgame
See...
02:12:52
The Whole Ballgame
It'll all be gone before long, i would imagine.
02:13:02
uncleStinky
Yeah, I mean, the game's already changed enough. to It's not even... i mean, sure, you can do the mental and gymnastics if you want to, but you're just fucking fooling yourself.
02:13:17
The Whole Ballgame
trying frankly, you can do whatever you want.
02:13:21
uncleStinky
Quite frankly, and it's always been entertainment.
02:13:27
uncleStinky
It's about the experience is what you're paying for. Nobody gives a shit if the team wins.
02:13:30
The Whole Ballgame
Mm-hmm.
02:13:33
uncleStinky
They want to go out and feel good and feel like they had a fun time at the ballpark and got to experience some good times, close friends, maybe family, maybe somebody
Game-Day Atmosphere
02:13:45
The Whole Ballgame
It's real good point.
02:13:45
uncleStinky
you're cheating on your wife with, perhaps a lover of the same sex.
02:13:54
uncleStinky
Quite frankly, I don't know.
02:13:58
The Whole Ballgame
And it worked out for Michael.
02:14:04
uncleStinky
Get the pillows.
02:14:04
The Whole Ballgame
Here comes the big hurt.
02:14:05
uncleStinky
Here comes the big hurt.
02:14:12
The Whole Ballgame
think Mark Clark might get the hook here.
02:14:15
uncleStinky
I would pull him.
02:14:19
uncleStinky
But i've been see I've seen too much modern baseball.
02:14:26
The Whole Ballgame
The crowd is ah getting rambunctious here.
02:14:31
uncleStinky
I think your options are you stick with Clark. What he wants, he doesn't want to um bring in Mesa to pitch here and then wait and continue to the ninth.
02:14:44
uncleStinky
If this was Ventura, he probably would bring in the left-hander.
02:14:45
The Whole Ballgame
Right.
02:14:50
uncleStinky
But I would fucking bring Mesa in.
02:14:57
The Whole Ballgame
Ooh, see, that was high. Frank didn't like that call.
02:15:02
uncleStinky
Frank didn't have such a judicious eye. He would have knocked the shit out of that one There's a fat ball
02:15:16
The Whole Ballgame
Papa's running 20 years of Syria on Sirius XM.
02:15:24
uncleStinky
See nah What the fuck are you doing that porn
02:15:25
The Whole Ballgame
Didn't get enough of it. You need to unlock something. Please try again. No, I think i I said something that sounded like Siri.
02:15:38
uncleStinky
Yeah.
02:15:38
The Whole Ballgame
And so my phone reacted to it, but um Papa's running a series
02:15:40
uncleStinky
Hmm.
02:15:45
The Whole Ballgame
on on while they're out for the holiday of 20 years in 20 days of their, cause it's been 20 years. They've been on XM serious.
02:15:55
The Whole Ballgame
And, uh, uh,
02:15:58
uncleStinky
Series black.
02:16:00
The Whole Ballgame
Speaking of, uh, uh, large testicles, uh, they had a man on the show. i don't know what year it was exactly, but I was listening to it tonight, uh, whose testicles weighed 170 pounds because he had a, he had, he, he smashed one of his lymph nodes and, they just continually fill with liquid and he's got to get them drained pretty regularly.
02:16:16
uncleStinky
a
02:16:26
The Whole Ballgame
But yeah, he, carries them around in a milk crate,
02:16:33
The Whole Ballgame
upside down milk crate. And he carries his testicles around that way. They weighed them on the air.
02:16:40
uncleStinky
That's awful, man.
02:16:42
The Whole Ballgame
Awful, just terrible.
02:16:45
uncleStinky
That...
02:16:48
uncleStinky
Probably just never has any time to himself from all the sacks.
02:16:59
uncleStinky
I mean, chicks love big balls, right?
02:17:02
The Whole Ballgame
Yeah, that's that's what they love.
02:17:05
uncleStinky
just want lick them.
02:17:05
The Whole Ballgame
Here we go. Yeah, here it is.
Humorous Male Anatomy Talk
02:17:17
uncleStinky
I gotta tell you, like, I've always been, it's it's almost, you know, it you gotta to be careful, because it can be painful getting your balls sucked.
02:17:28
uncleStinky
Especially try to, like, pop one. Get all cute.
02:17:35
uncleStinky
Like, you know that's attached to something, right, bitch?
02:17:38
The Whole Ballgame
Wesley Warren Jr. ah was an American man who attracted worldwide attention for his problems with scroed elephantitis, which caused his scrotum to grow to a weight of, excuse me, i was wrong, 132.5 pounds and hang down a little below his knees.
02:17:46
uncleStinky
Oh, okay, here we go.
02:17:54
uncleStinky
Oh, I throw Kark, you bitch.
02:18:01
The Whole Ballgame
After launching a campaign to raise money for
02:18:02
uncleStinky
Oh, no, it's not Kark, sorry.
02:18:04
The Whole Ballgame
In operation to resolve the problem, for which he raised only $2,000, he underwent surgery in April of 2013 after visiting Dr.
02:18:12
uncleStinky
So sad.
02:18:13
The Whole Ballgame
Joel Gelman of the University of California, Irvine Center for Reconstructive Urology, which was aware that Warren could not afford surgery and so performed it for free.
02:18:24
The Whole Ballgame
Warren struggles with his condition and the subsequent operation were filmed by British television crew for a documentary, the man with the 10 stone testicles, which aired on channel four in the United Kingdom ah in 2013. He died of complications of diabetes on March 14th, 2014. Um, so, uh, less than a year after he got the surgery, he died of diabetes.
02:18:51
uncleStinky
Well, that's just the way it is, I guess.
02:18:55
The Whole Ballgame
Born in Orange, New Jersey, Warren was a former resident in New York City. Worked in security.
02:19:03
uncleStinky
Oh.
02:19:04
The Whole Ballgame
DJ caught that. Good work. Good work, son. He moved to Las Vegas in the 90s. Worked on commission to find locations for pay phones in the Las Vegas Valley.
02:19:17
uncleStinky
What a job.
02:19:18
The Whole Ballgame
He fell ill in late 2008 and attributed the onset of his condition to accidentally striking his testicles while sleeping.
Testicular Swelling Anecdote
02:19:27
uncleStinky
Oh my god.
02:19:27
The Whole Ballgame
He said, I had never felt such a pain. It was like a shooting pain through my entire body. When it stopped, it was like a huge tractor trailer went on the top of me. I think it ruined my lymph nodes down there.
02:19:40
The Whole Ballgame
The following morning, he found that his scrotum had swelled to the size of a soccer ball.
02:19:45
uncleStinky
Fuck.
02:19:51
uncleStinky
Paul Ostenmacher coming into the game for Blackjack Vandal.
02:19:56
The Whole Ballgame
We're about to get the numbers on Austin Mocker.
02:19:59
uncleStinky
Goddamn, man. That's terrifying. How do you accidentally... was he He had to be doing something he shouldn't have been.
02:20:06
The Whole Ballgame
So what he said on Stern, when I was listening, he said he'd always had relatively large testicles and he woke up that morning. They were relatively loose, like, you know, when they're just kind of flopping around.
02:20:18
uncleStinky
Sure.
02:20:18
The Whole Ballgame
And he said they separated out and he flopped his legs over the side of the bed and his right leg smashed down on his right testicle.
02:20:23
uncleStinky
Hmm.
02:20:27
uncleStinky
Yeah, I've sat
02:20:27
The Whole Ballgame
And that was the pain and he smashed it. And then the swelling.
02:20:34
uncleStinky
Yeah, no they're sitting on a nut is awful.
02:20:41
The Whole Ballgame
Never had that problem. with really tiny testicles. so
02:20:47
uncleStinky
Thank you for for sharing that with us. yeah
02:20:56
uncleStinky
It really is a pleasure serving with you.
02:21:03
The Whole Ballgame
Actually, i mean, if we're being real honest here, my left one's pretty regular size. My right one, though. See, when I was 10, had ah inguinal hernia surgery because the tissue never formed in my abdomen.
02:21:24
The Whole Ballgame
That keeps your testicle in your scrotal sac.
02:21:27
uncleStinky
Sure.
02:21:28
The Whole Ballgame
So it would float back between my abdomen and my my scrotum until I was 10. And I had surgery at that point where they tethered that testicle.
02:21:39
The Whole Ballgame
In my scrotum.
02:21:41
uncleStinky
That's good. I'm glad.
02:21:42
The Whole Ballgame
It's called a, it's a version of a hernia. Cause there was a tear in the tissue and what have you. And that's a, so my right testicles only about 10 years behind my left.
02:21:53
uncleStinky
Well, that's good.
02:21:58
uncleStinky
they can just tether it down more or oh ah
02:22:03
The Whole Ballgame
No, they did. That's what they did. They just did. We didn't know. It didn't notice it happening until I was about 10.
02:22:09
uncleStinky
i see gotcha okay quite the facial hair on hollywood here
02:22:18
The Whole Ballgame
It looks a little bit like a the moon pie.
02:22:23
uncleStinky
remember paul ossenmacher from the eighty s late 80s braves
02:22:31
The Whole Ballgame
Wearing in Jackie Robinson's number. i don't know if you noticed that.
02:22:33
uncleStinky
I do.
02:22:40
The Whole Ballgame
He didn't go up there to paint.
Playful Banter on Players
02:22:45
uncleStinky
I missed what happened to Kark.
02:22:50
The Whole Ballgame
I had to be somewhere.
02:22:54
uncleStinky
Ah, very well.
02:22:59
The Whole Ballgame
and I had an arrangement and he was always really good about it. So...
02:23:08
The Whole Ballgame
ah
02:23:08
uncleStinky
Jesus Christ, Paul.
02:23:09
The Whole Ballgame
Look at that. All right, good for you, Paul.
02:23:13
The Whole Ballgame
He's laughing about it, too.
02:23:17
uncleStinky
Franco, Ventura, and Jackson in the bottom of the ninth.
02:23:26
uncleStinky
James A. Angio, hell of a fucking director.
02:23:33
uncleStinky
Toohey. Hot Toohey. I'm just Hot Toohey's dad. yeah That's good shit. But you're scrolling.
02:23:43
The Whole Ballgame
Now I got a text from the lady.
02:23:46
uncleStinky
What's that?
02:23:46
The Whole Ballgame
I didn't wake her up, but it is what it is.
02:23:51
uncleStinky
Oh, I thought you said from a lady.
02:23:55
The Whole Ballgame
the, the, not a Please, Blake, we talked about this.
02:23:56
uncleStinky
Hmm.
02:24:10
uncleStinky
Gabe, I'm in here with a child trying to slumber. Cut out your bullshit. I've only had six hours of sleep so far.
02:24:26
uncleStinky
I need to get a solid 14. I'm going to be working in the next two weeks. I have to get my rest.
02:24:35
The Whole Ballgame
It's 17, by the way.
02:24:36
uncleStinky
Ha ha.
02:24:39
uncleStinky
Goddamn, man. I think I would pay $1,000 if I could just sleep till noon tomorrow.
02:24:50
uncleStinky
don't know who I'd give it to, but whoever could make that.
02:24:53
The Whole Ballgame
um I mean, I'll take it.
02:24:54
uncleStinky
Yeah, yeah.
02:25:02
The Whole Ballgame
Mark Clark's still in this ballgame. Giving them a complete game here, aren't they?
02:25:07
uncleStinky
He ain't no bitch.
02:25:07
The Whole Ballgame
Oh, look at that.
02:25:09
uncleStinky
yeah Yeah, it might blow up in their face.
02:25:14
The Whole Ballgame
Julio Franco.
02:25:17
uncleStinky
Hawk's excited about the tying run being on with nobody out.
02:25:21
The Whole Ballgame
We're in the bottom of the ninth, man.
02:25:23
uncleStinky
It's nut-cutting time. I tell you, about every every hour to three hours or so, I get paranoid that somebody's sneaking up from behind to attack me.
02:25:27
The Whole Ballgame
That's what they say.
02:25:39
The Whole Ballgame
Is that real?
02:25:39
uncleStinky
It
02:25:39
The Whole Ballgame
Or are you just
02:25:40
uncleStinky
No, it flashes through my head.
02:25:45
The Whole Ballgame
momentarily or does it persist?
02:25:49
uncleStinky
Well, every one to three hours.
02:25:57
The Whole Ballgame
Shit.
02:26:00
The Whole Ballgame
I don't know what to tell you. Brother?
02:26:01
uncleStinky
think guess's i think I think it's the Hulkster.
02:26:05
The Whole Ballgame
Brother?
02:26:08
uncleStinky
think it's his spirit.
02:26:09
The Whole Ballgame
Look, dude, you got understand, man.
02:26:11
uncleStinky
Tell me be vigilant.
02:26:13
The Whole Ballgame
Mm-hmm.
02:26:15
uncleStinky
Dark forces at work against us.
02:26:21
The Whole Ballgame
I'm misunderstanding. You didn't really work against you. You know, if you're in the way, you might make you look collateral damage, but there's no no targeting, you know?
02:26:36
The Whole Ballgame
It's not, you know, You can't control other people.
02:26:36
uncleStinky
Right.
02:26:40
The Whole Ballgame
That's what I always say.
02:26:44
uncleStinky
You can possess them and do it.
02:26:47
The Whole Ballgame
We don't really do that. I mean, there's a rare occasion where it does happen, but that's not about... to It's not about you know taking control or trying to to ruin a life or anything like that. she so Sometimes some people are especially suited to taking care of business in certain circumstances than others would be
Demons: Humor and Skepticism
02:27:10
The Whole Ballgame
aware of.
02:27:10
The Whole Ballgame
There
02:27:12
uncleStinky
Yeah, I got to tell you something, Bob. i'm not too I'm not too thrilled with...
02:27:15
The Whole Ballgame
you should.
02:27:17
uncleStinky
There's an awful lot of fucking people talking about demons and demonics like like it's real. like
02:27:26
The Whole Ballgame
Yes, it's beautiful.
02:27:26
uncleStinky
um it's It's pretty absurd.
02:27:29
The Whole Ballgame
shi v on I a day. Back in the 20s or something like that, somebody said there' there was some video of freak show, guys, tentacle arms or whatever. It was real but demon that they caught or something like that. Like, you can catch a demon. the army You can catch a demon. You want to catch a demon. It's ridiculous.
02:27:51
The Whole Ballgame
Demons aren't really a thing, you know. ah Demons are just ah a construct that we keep in our heads, try to scare people around. You know, dark forces and elements and things like that, but there's not really such a thing as a demon, you know.
02:28:09
The Whole Ballgame
If there was demons around you, they'd be real shite into them things.
02:28:14
uncleStinky
Well, they believe in angels, so they're going to believe in demons.
02:28:18
The Whole Ballgame
Yeah, guess that's true. What I'm discovering today is that Bob is really just um like... oh like a standard drunk character mixed with um Cliff Clavin from Cheers.
02:28:37
uncleStinky
Yeah, yeah. it's
02:28:38
The Whole Ballgame
There's a lot of Cliff Clavin in Bob.
02:28:40
uncleStinky
Nothing but agreeable.
02:28:44
The Whole Ballgame
so You know, she brought that up there, Blake. yeah You know, in 1962, the Pilgrims, they they came to the New World.
02:28:57
uncleStinky
Thanks. Did you say wicked breaking ball, brother? It's wicked. wicked.
02:29:05
The Whole Ballgame
Winless in the last nine games here at Comiskey Park are the Indians trying to turn that around today.
02:29:12
uncleStinky
Speaking of wicked hat.
02:29:12
The Whole Ballgame
Just saw a giant wad of dip going in his mouth.
02:29:15
uncleStinky
Mm-hmm.
02:29:15
The Whole Ballgame
You see that?
02:29:15
uncleStinky
Uh-oh. Six for safe.
02:29:17
The Whole Ballgame
Disgusting. And, oh, didn't turn it.
02:29:22
uncleStinky
I feel like I've seen that umpire make two out calls that were closer than that, I thought earlier.
02:29:22
The Whole Ballgame
Two down here. Bottom of the ninth.
02:29:29
uncleStinky
But I'm just a cockeyed optimist.
02:29:35
The Whole Ballgame
Tomorrow is Festivus, you understand.
02:29:38
uncleStinky
Mm-hmm. Good, good.
02:29:40
The Whole Ballgame
As I raid blows upon him, I thought, there has to be another way.
02:29:48
uncleStinky
yeah
02:29:49
The Whole Ballgame
That must have been some doll. She really was.
02:29:54
uncleStinky
One of those real dolls?
02:29:57
The Whole Ballgame
Jesus Christ.
02:30:01
The Whole Ballgame
Comes down to Lance Johnson here.
Future of Companionship?
02:30:03
The Whole Ballgame
Bottom of the ninth
02:30:06
uncleStinky
You know, I think if something happened to my wife, I'd probably just be content with whatever the high-tech sex doll is of the time moving forward.
02:30:15
The Whole Ballgame
no comment Yep, probably.
02:30:17
uncleStinky
It just seems like the least problematic thing, you know?
02:30:20
The Whole Ballgame
Mm-hmm,
02:30:22
uncleStinky
It's probably pretty awesome, too.
02:30:23
The Whole Ballgame
I would guess.
02:30:25
uncleStinky
Especially the ones that, like, will move on their own and stuff.
02:30:28
The Whole Ballgame
Yep, yep. Yep, having sex with anything would be pretty good.
02:30:35
uncleStinky
Well, I heard you've been getting laid on the reg lately, hadn't you?
02:30:39
The Whole Ballgame
on the reg, that's right. Three times in almost three years, no big deal.
02:30:44
uncleStinky
Damn. Damn. Look at you getting it done.
02:30:46
The Whole Ballgame
Good stuff. Joey, fuck off. Joey Cora's on deck. See, Joey Cora can be the difference maker here, but they're not, he's not up up yet.
02:30:57
The Whole Ballgame
don't
02:30:58
uncleStinky
How is the hows the new routines?
02:31:01
The Whole Ballgame
want talk about it.
02:31:01
uncleStinky
okay Oh, base hit!
02:31:01
The Whole Ballgame
There it is. Lance, Lance Johnson.
02:31:05
uncleStinky
The one dog!
02:31:06
The Whole Ballgame
My goodness. Uh-oh. Oh, there we go.
02:31:08
uncleStinky
Shit.
02:31:10
The Whole Ballgame
My goodness.
02:31:12
uncleStinky
Yeah, first and third, baby.
02:31:18
uncleStinky
Those deviants are excited.
02:31:21
The Whole Ballgame
Very, that guy in the red polo is just out of his mind.
02:31:26
The Whole Ballgame
Look at that guy with the backwards hat. That's
02:31:26
uncleStinky
Oh, look at the fucking meathead.
02:31:29
uncleStinky
That's where those dudes that beat the shit Gamboa are sitting. It's probably them.
02:31:32
The Whole Ballgame
where they were, yeah. my god Yeah, that could have very easily gone the wrong way.
02:31:39
uncleStinky
Kenny Zilofki didn't put that in the fucking...
02:31:52
The Whole Ballgame
Runners in the corners, two outs, and it's all up to Joey Cora here, the bottom of the ninth.
02:32:06
The Whole Ballgame
Man, I'm fast.
02:32:12
The Whole Ballgame
Joe, welcome to the ball game. Well, I appreciate you bringing me on.
02:32:18
uncleStinky
Hey.
02:32:20
uncleStinky
eight
02:32:21
The Whole Ballgame
I like my time in Chicago, but I like Seattle better.
02:32:26
The Whole Ballgame
Why is that, Joey? I like the climate.
02:32:33
uncleStinky
Hang on.
02:32:33
The Whole Ballgame
I like it really wet, if you understand my meaning.
02:32:42
uncleStinky
Don't forget to bring a towel.
02:32:49
The Whole Ballgame
That's the end of the ballgame.
Final Out and Conclusion
02:32:51
The Whole Ballgame
Joey Gore grounds out for the third out in the ninth inning.
02:32:55
uncleStinky
Oh, I'm going to go get it a little high now.
02:32:55
The Whole Ballgame
And
02:32:59
The Whole Ballgame
Jeff Russell grabs himself a close.
02:33:03
uncleStinky
Yes, he does.
02:33:08
The Whole Ballgame
Wimpy and Hawk going to wrap it up after these messages from the guy who keeps his brain in his hair.
02:33:20
uncleStinky
guy is doing drugs.
02:33:22
The Whole Ballgame
Look at that fucking wide lapel. Look at that. That lapel's fucking as big as my gut.
02:33:25
uncleStinky
Goddamn.
02:33:28
uncleStinky
It's an absurd tie.
02:33:29
The Whole Ballgame
That's a wide-ass lapel.
02:33:32
The Whole Ballgame
Ron Karkavise gets drive of the game here. You're goddamn right I do.
02:33:44
uncleStinky
Second night in a row. How about that?
02:33:48
The Whole Ballgame
Well, you know, sometimes the stars align and you get exactly what you need out of life.
02:33:57
uncleStinky
Thank you for that.
02:33:58
The Whole Ballgame
Speaking of which, Blake, what's next for the whole ballgame?
02:34:04
uncleStinky
Well, that would be um the aforementioned Cincinnati Reds and Houston Astros baseball night in America. Riverfront Stadium.
02:34:15
uncleStinky
That would
02:34:16
The Whole Ballgame
Do we know what date we're dealing with here? That will make a lot of difference in whether I'm able to show up.
02:34:25
uncleStinky
be, I believe it is July of 94. We got them.
02:34:32
uncleStinky
and
02:34:32
The Whole Ballgame
Deck the halls with boughs of holly. Fa la la la la.