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Mtn Dew Pitch Black Presents: I’d Like To Thank Applebees
58 Plays3 years ago
For the first time ever Garrett and Fax have been left alone to do a wrestling podcast, what happened was wrestling adjacent. They're chatting the Royal Rumble sponsors, Dave Meltzer's eating habits, HARDY, VR Wrestling, Dixie Crystal and more!
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Transcript
Introduction and Host Dynamics
00:00:34
Speaker
Hey everybody, welcome to another episode of Predetermined, a Pro Wrestling Hangout. I'm your host, Garrett Callender, and with me, as always, a man who is presented by Pennzoil and Taco Bell Grudge Wrap Supreme. Facts, Jimmy facts. I am Jimmy facts, facts to my friends, Jimmy to my family.
00:00:55
Speaker
And let's just address the elephant in the room right now. This is weird, Garrett. Me and you, I don't think we've ever done just me and you, right? I've done me and Chris. You've done you and Chris. You did you and Derek for ages. You and Heater, sure. I've done you and Chris at the same time. That was pretty good. We did that one. It was like bukkake, where it was just all of us all over the place. We made a mess of it.
00:01:23
Speaker
We were, yeah, we were all wet. No, I was wondering that myself. I didn't know if you and I had ever done this and I wondered, do we have the chemistry alone to take this, to do a one hour Broadway, to take this to the end?
00:01:40
Speaker
Yeah, I always wonder like, am I just gonna get kicked off the podcast? Because every time it's just you and Chris, and then I listen, I'm always like, I have imposter syndrome. I'm like, oh my God, it's so much better
Podcast Ambitions and Sponsorship Humor
00:01:53
Speaker
without me. I'm hearing the Undertaker thing. Now, it's on the other foot. I'm like, if this goes well, we may never see Chris on this podcast again.
00:02:04
Speaker
is that, I mean, it's not necessarily- That's my goal. That is my goal is to not just get him off the podcast, but just utterly destroy the life of one of my best, dearest friends, Chris Miggs. Do you want to continue to see him outside of the podcast? Or do you just want him not on here anymore? Yeah, and mostly to like rub it in.
00:02:30
Speaker
Right. You know, what would be the best is if if our wives remained very close friends so that I could like hang over their conversations at brunch and like be like, so the podcast is doing really well, just remarkably well. We got we got retweeted by Sammy minutes after the minutes after the rumble.
00:02:55
Speaker
Well, hey, I'm a little thirsty. So I gotta make myself a drink here. Oh, you got one Mountain Dew Pitch Black. That's why I introduced you as sponsored by Pennzoil and Taco Bell. I figure if WWE is gonna let matches be sponsored and themed, we can sponsor our podcasters, like NASCAR cars. Absolutely.
Jimmy's Drink Creations and Wrestling Marketing
00:03:24
Speaker
We are going to be talking a bit about the Royal Rumble today, but I do need to make this drink first in honor of the Mountain Dew Pitch Black Match. And is the drink that you and Chris make, is that a real drink? Like, is that really the name of that drink or is that something you just call it?
00:03:41
Speaker
So it's, we made it up, but we have, we do on time to time, we'll go to, oh, nice. We will go to, uh, like a watch along, like at a bar in Manhattan or something. There'll be watch parties. We almost did one for the rumble this week, but then like it kind of fell apart at the last minute. So we'll definitely tell people about it there. And we're like trying to get it off the ground. So the Genesis of the drink was this is like early pandemic.
00:04:11
Speaker
And we're like, we started doing like weekly, let's watch some wrestling. You know, you joined sometimes, but like me and Chris, we had a quarter of people we did every week and we would drink and just, cause we were deathly afraid of each other, right? And germs and COVID. So we were like, let's just drink at a home and do a video call. We watched the same wrestling and we'd have like different themes. So we'd be like, that's why. So we're going to do a Ric Flair night. And then we were like, we need to make a Ric Flair drink.
00:04:41
Speaker
And then I had the idea, well, whatever the drink is, it's got to be called Space Mountain. Right. And then that's where Mountain Dew whiskey kind of just came came into focus of. So that's what a Space Mountain Dew is. Sorry, a Space Mountain is just is just Mountain Dew and.
00:04:59
Speaker
and whiskey and it looks like you have a very interesting choice of whiskey that you're mixing into your pitch black. So basically how this came to be is I had Heater and his wife over for the rumble. I wanted to make some space mountains with the Mountain Dew pitch black in honor of the match and
00:05:19
Speaker
Which I'll tell you, I went to a couple gas stations and two grocery stores before I found Pitch Black. So either the marketing from this match is like very much working and it's sold out everywhere or it's shit and no one's stocking it.
00:05:35
Speaker
I think it's the latter because Chris lives, and this is the last time people will ever hear his name on this podcast, ever. He lives in Queens, which as you might have heard is a pretty big place with a lot of people. A lot of business. I've heard of it from Sex and the City.
Eli Drake's Career and Wrestling Personas
00:05:52
Speaker
Exactly. I don't think they spoke kindly of it, but that's where they do Grand Slam Garrett.
00:05:57
Speaker
They do the grand slam there. And he said he went to six different places and went for six when he finally threw in the towel. So I do think that there might be some distribution issues and maybe it's not ready for market yet.
00:06:15
Speaker
I mean, they wanted to see how the match was. They wanted to see if like, if Bray, if Bray Wyatt went like 40 minutes and was like cracking out a Danielson like work rate, those orders are going to go through the roof. But, you know, it's kind of like, Oh, I know this was Eli Drake's pay-per-view debut with WWE. I have no idea. I, so he's a guy let's, and let's talk about that.
00:06:37
Speaker
Every single time I see in writing the name L.A. Knight, I go, well, I know it's not Swerve Strickland because he's been in the AEW for a while. I know this is a guy I know, but I don't know who it is. And then I Google it and I'm like, oh, him. Oh, yeah.
00:06:55
Speaker
Don't worry. I didn't know. I didn't know Eli Drake's name off the top of my head. I watched him for half that fucking match. And then I'm like, I have to Google. I don't remember this guy's name. I remembered him as soon as I saw the picture on the Google results, but it definitely was like I had no L.A. night. Just it's like the most generic NXT eyes name.
00:07:20
Speaker
That just means nothing. And I don't think Eli Drake as in like a West Coast guy. Maybe he is, but I I don't I definitely don't go. Oh, yeah, L.A. That's Drake country.
00:07:30
Speaker
Well, I know it was at what's impact, uh, Slammiversary, I think was in Nashville a couple of times. Maybe it was, it was one of them. No, it was homecoming. And I want to say it was Eli Drake versus Moose. And we were right up front and that sounds like a very impact match. Yeah. Right. But it was a hardcore match and Eli Drake ended up covered in blood and going through thumbtacks and like,
00:07:55
Speaker
It was it was I remember that show being honestly excellent if you can find it anywhere. I don't know where you watch old impact pay per views. Probably streaming service. Well, honestly, most of their life is available on YouTube. So I yeah, I'd say it's about 70 percent chance if that matters on a pay per view and you're saying it was there's about 70 percent chance it is on the official impact YouTube for free.
00:08:20
Speaker
I just remember after it was over, I had posted a video of that and tagged him in it. And my wife commented and tagged him as well and told him like, Hey, you're a handsome guy. You don't have to be doing that. It's okay. You can just be a handsome guy. You don't have to go through thumbtacks. And he seemed to appreciate that. I don't remember what he commented, but thank you.
00:08:45
Speaker
I will say this and it ties into this is that he's he's one of those guys that you know he's been around forever right and then like so when I look I'm like oh yeah deal I drink and I look it up and I'm like he's had a long career it's kind of weird that now at this stage of his career he's in WWE so I'm like how old is he
00:09:06
Speaker
And, you know, he's in phenomenal shape. He's a handsome guy. And I look and he is like my age, which simultaneously confirms like, yeah, that's pretty old to be going to WWE to kind of work like mid and lower card matches for the most part, except for the occasional push to get squashed by Bray Wyatt. But then I felt horrible that he looks like that.
00:09:30
Speaker
And he's the one in the Mountain Dew Pitch Black match, and I'm the one that I can't even get my Mountain Dew Pitch Black to go with my quesadillas and soft ground meat tacos that taste like cat food.
00:09:46
Speaker
Well, before we get into the match itself, I do wanna say what ended up in my drink. So I do have Mountain Dew Pitch Black, which according to the thing, I believe it's grape flavored and it says with citrus. And I was looking to our liquor cabinet. Grape and citrus, those are two flavors you always put together, right? Yeah. And I was going through our liquor cabinet and the only whiskey I could find was Maker's Mark. And I was like, well, I don't really wanna like,
00:10:15
Speaker
ruin this with Mountain Dew. So I dug to the very back and I found a bottle of screwball peanut butter whiskey that nobody wants and has been in there for years that we've been trying to get rid of but no one wants to drink it.
00:10:33
Speaker
Cause that's where it's like, you're like, we have grape, we have citrus. Let's throw some peanut butter in the motherfucker too. Let's throw it. We pour this in. I swear to God, this tastes just like a peanut butter and jelly drink. That doesn't sound great. It's not something I would want.
00:10:50
Speaker
all the time. Like I wouldn't go to a bar and be like, give me that. I honestly, I think if you sold this at a college bar, tell a bunch of them, screwball, Mountain Dew, get together. Or just like one of those sleazy townie bars that like is really lax on the fake IDs, like to actually look at them over. So try to get in some of those youth smokers, the ones that are vaping the strawberry smelling stuff. That's your key market is the strawberry vapors. The cops will just sit at the door and watch to see who orders that shit to arrest them for underage drinking.
00:11:20
Speaker
Exactly. I'm a grown boy. Give me a PBR. But no, this drink, honestly, I think if once a year I can drink this and watch this specific match, it's the perfect combo. You know, it's interesting because you describing that drink, it actually just feels like the Mountain Dew
00:11:41
Speaker
People, the executives of Mountain Dew were like, okay, well Moxley stopped drinking, but we know she misses Jagermeister. So what can we make that just tastes like Jagermeister but has no alcohol in it? But like a violent amount of caffeine. It
Wrestling Event Memories and Sponsorships
00:12:00
Speaker
probably over thins your blood so you can play it easier.
00:12:04
Speaker
Which, okay. Just Renee sees him going for the Mountain Dew pitch black. Like, no. No, John. We're on vacation. No pitch black. It's like something that give you in rehab to wean you off. Right. It's right. It's right at the AA meeting next to the donuts. It's just the donuts and the Mountain Dew pitch plaques for everybody.
00:12:29
Speaker
Oh, okay. If we're just going to keep going on the pitch black without even talk without even talking about the match, maybe a couple of my favorite moments. Honestly, I had a, let's just say I had a very good time with this pay-per-view, but all my favorite moments involve sponsorship.
00:12:45
Speaker
What I do want to be fair, the match wasn't much the pitch black match and it was it was short, but it was visually very good. It looked really cool and Bray Wyatt gimmick matches involving elaborate visuals have not traditionally gone well.
00:13:04
Speaker
It's true. It's true. Like I was at the one where he fought Randy Orton and like then the ring looked like worms. That's a bad match. Which live. That was fantastic. That was like watching a bad movie in progress where it's like because you're off to the side. You're like, is that fucking worms? What are they projecting on there? That was more of a for the folks at home match.
00:13:27
Speaker
Yeah, I could see how in person it would be like going to an art installation, but on TV, it was complete bullshit.
00:13:35
Speaker
And then he had his House of Horrors match. Most of his shit involves Randy Orton, where I think all I wanted out of House of Horrors match was for them to go in a room and Boogeyman be in the corner eating worms. They didn't do it, but he did throw a refrigerator at old Randy and set the house on fire. I don't remember. There was definitely a house on fire. I do definitely remember that.
00:13:58
Speaker
But yeah, this one, we had no idea what it was gonna be. They hit the lights, everybody is vibrant. It looks like you're wrestling in a Spencer's gifts, minus the butt plugs and stuff. And then at the end, maybe Darby Allen, maybe Bo Dallas, somebody did a coffin drop. It was somebody who's supposed to be an old man, but looked kind of small. And yeah, I think it goes without saying that
00:14:27
Speaker
I don't think they should bring this match back for the Rumble next year. I think there should be an entire pay-per-view. Maybe they do it the December one next year. It's all done like this. I'm gonna get high off my balls and watch it. Like right now, where I am with WWE, I watch the Rumble. I will probably watch at least one night at WrestleMania. Maybe I'll check out SummerSlam. That's it for me.
00:14:54
Speaker
Right. Maybe I'll check out the elimination chamber. If we get the big Sami Zane stuff, we'll talk about that in a bit. You know, maybe I'll check out money in the bank if there's a reason, but there hasn't been in a very long time, but I'm telling you, and I'm definitely not checking out any of those Saudi shows. I am watching if you're doing a Mountain Dew pitch black black light show at the Spencer's arena.
00:15:17
Speaker
in Portland. You get a complimentary Betty Page poster on the way in and a pen that says who farted.
00:15:32
Speaker
I'll travel to go see one of these. I'm actually jealous that we weren't in San Antonio watching this live. I've been to a Royal Rumble in San Antonio and I'm bummed that yes, I saw AJ Styles versus John Cena in what was one of the greatest matches I've ever seen in person in my life when I won it. But I didn't get to see.
00:15:53
Speaker
Bray Wyatt grow a second blacklight mask somehow. That's pretty cool. OK, so back to the Mountain Dew pitch black. So we hit the the the post show because now they're doing press conferences like AEW at the end. I did not watch any of it. What's the any highlights from it?
00:16:14
Speaker
Absolutely, absolutely. Cody Rhodes talked way too fucking long. And I remember at a certain point saying, if you're not gonna eat a muffin, shut the fuck up. But they had the two Mountain Dues on both sides of the microphone because Mountain Dew sponsored the event and a huge Mountain Dew logo behind them. Cody sits down. The first thing he does is pick up one of those warm Mountain Dues
00:16:41
Speaker
And when he popped that top off and I heard it, and he went to take a sip, I was just fucking zeroed in on his face. Because I tasted this without booze, and it's not very good. I definitely at home made a face when I took a sip of this, and I knew Cody on television had to hide that. And he's like, to show you how good of an actor he is, he took a little sip, and he's like, I haven't had sugar in three months,
00:17:12
Speaker
And I'm guessing there's a little in this. And then he really praised. He spent at least a minute and a half to two minutes praising this drink. So backstage, some Mountain Dew representative's like, hey, I'll touch a penis if you... To say it sounds nice. I mean, he's looking at it as he's here to win the title, right? He's on the biggest show. He wants to pick up some endorsements. And he's probably thinking in his head, he goes, listen, I got Nick Aldis over.
00:17:41
Speaker
to the point that tens of thousands, hundreds of thousands of people wanted to order that pay-per-view. I can get this Mountain Dew pitch black over, at least as much as all this.
00:17:52
Speaker
You're right, he might be the, he's the greatest salesman in the history of America. Like he is wrestling's Don Draper. Like he can put over any product at the end. Think about how into that match against Dustin and then the tag match with him and Dustin against the Bucks we were, and then nothing before or after from Dustin for a solid three years in either direction. I mean,
00:18:20
Speaker
You could say the same about I saw him wrestle a guy at a pay-per-view, and I did not see this man again until I was at the gym by my house watching Beastman wrestle. What the fuck is that guy's name? Was it a British guy? Sean Spears? No, no. Fuck, he's in the nightmare factory now. What was that? It was supposed to be a big match, and it was like- Hugh T. Marshall? New.
00:18:47
Speaker
So you don't even remember this guy. He's one of the, Oh, uh, the boxer guy, the boxer guy, like the British boxer guy. I don't remember his name, but you know what Cody, I do know Mountain Dew pitch black and that's thanks to you and Spencer's gifts.
00:19:03
Speaker
The other best thing that happened on that show was Triple H comes out, he's the last guy to speak. And at a certain point he says, he's got the huge Mountain Dew logo behind him. He goes, first off, I'd like to thank Mountain Dew.
00:19:20
Speaker
and I'd like to thank Applebee's. And that was the greatest sentence in the history of professional wrestling. Even tried to get a t-shirt made with a bubble coming out of his mouth in that moment that said, I'd like to thank Applebee's. It got canceled to do a copyright infringement. Yeah, we'll skirt around that. That's glorious for a lottery. Well, it was also was trips.
00:19:50
Speaker
Like i'm wondering if tony con should just say that all of his press conference are also sponsored and do and that's why he's so clearly coked up cuz i feel like hunter was probably a little more sedate than tony con in the press conference. He was so calm to tell me that he think apple bees and yeah.
00:20:09
Speaker
He really meant it. He meant it. I believed him. He's like, I have all my birthdays there. The brownie always comes out warm and the beer always comes out cold. True story. I went there with a friend of mine named Jean. We said, hey, put on the cake, sing the song, put on the cake, happy birthday to the Jean. They misspelled it. It said the game. I was like, that's cool. That's my new wrestling name. All happened.
00:20:39
Speaker
Did you see the Applebee's commercial that aired in the middle of the Royal Rumble? It is so hard to remember because there were so, so many commercials. But yeah, I mean, I at least had the TV on for it, I'm sure, but I don't have specific recall.
00:20:57
Speaker
Well, it was Seth Rollins and Becky Lynch eating at an Applebee's having the time of their life. Like everything. Seth is like really hamming up how good of a time he's having at Applebee's while wearing clothes that would get you or I kicked out of Applebee's. She was wearing a mesh shirt, sir. How like if I show up wearing that.
00:21:18
Speaker
And I feel like Seth shows up to set that day and there's probably some like marketing executives from Applebee's there to like oversee it. And he just comes up wearing that and they're like, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no. Nick Khan told, no, no. And then Seth is just like, eh.
00:21:43
Speaker
I didn't bring another shirt and I'm here to sell my sex. If you want me, if you want me, it needs to be in this shirt. I can't do it, Seth Rollins. And then they're like, fine, we're good with that. And then he's like, oh, no, no, no, Becky's not going to stay either. And she kind of looks at him like, I guess I will. She just thinks about her whole life and the paths, how they could diverge at this point if she just leaves Seth on the spot right here and there.
00:22:11
Speaker
care how fit your significant other is. If they're wearing a mesh shirt to Applebee's, you may have made a mistake along the way. Did you ever watch the Pete Holmes show on HBO? I can't remember. Yeah, crashing. Crashing. And there's the guy that gets with his wife, like he leaves his wife in the first, or she cheats on him in the first episode.
00:22:37
Speaker
Like kind of a hippie guy. He's a hippie guy, but he he looks so much like Seth Rollins. But I still to this day, even though Seth Rollins has been a part of our wrestling lives for like 15 years before that show started. And that show has been ended for years. I still think about that guy. And it always and like that guy you actually get to learn to love like later in the show, whereas Seth has been the opposite. Like he started out as that jerk and then has gotten progressively worse.
00:23:07
Speaker
At a certain point, have you ever, have you enjoyed, you enjoyed Seth at the beginning and you're not as- I've enjoyed, and I've always enjoyed the in-ring work, right? To be clear. Um, and I, and I kinda like the heel character, even in these later years, cause he, he has, he's using the right part of his real world personality in the character portrayed on television. So I think that's just good heel work, but yeah, his, him on like Twitter.
00:23:34
Speaker
And what you hear like his, his, the way he lives his life. Uh, I don't, it kind of puts heat on Becky in my mind that how she could be with him. Yeah. As far as I know, he likes the Chicago bears, um, CrossFit. Sure. And a shirt that lets you see his nipples.
00:23:57
Speaker
Right. Right. And that was that was the compromise, by the way, with the Applebee's people. So I don't even know where he actually started. So funny story. So as I mentioned, you know, maybe he who shall not be named Professor Tom, some other friends, we were going to meet up for the rumble at a bar in Manhattan.
Applebee's Adventures and Disappointments
00:24:18
Speaker
A couple of things kind of fell apart, like a couple of hours, like literally about two hours before I was going to leave my house. It kind of was like we kind of called it off.
00:24:27
Speaker
And my wife, we had no idea of the sponsorship. My wife immediately, because I just say something like, oh man, well, we're going to have to get some chicken wings because I was planning chicken wings at the bar and kind of got that in my head now. Like I'm entitled to chicken wings during the Royal Rumble. And she just without missing a beat just goes, oh, they'll probably have the Royal Rumble on at Applebee's. Why don't we go there?
00:24:50
Speaker
And I swear to God. And then I'm like, well, no, I'm not going out with the guys. Like, I don't want to go out with you and then you're not paying attention and you want to talk to me. And like, I'd rather just watch it at home. And that way, if the rumble gets boring, I can turn on the PlayStation or whatever. But but then we got in our head and we did order like 70 dollars of Applebee's takeout. And it took us like over 24 hours to eat it all. But like, yeah, we ordered a lot of Applebee's for the
00:25:20
Speaker
So that those ads really landed with me. And although here's the thing, and maybe I'm glad we're going to get the sponsorship with Mountain Dew and Taco Bell and Pennzoil. Because we're not going to get Applebee's because it is horrible. I haven't been to an Applebee's since I was in college. It is like inedible. I was expecting like diner level something, but no, it is borderline inedible. What about the wings though?
00:25:43
Speaker
The wings are fine, but the drumstick wings are huge, and the wing wing, the wingette wing, parts of the wing, are teeny tiny. So it's like, if you're splitting them like me and my wife were, there's a competitive element to that, which, you know, not great with friends and certainly couples. Some of those chickens were on the gas. I think all of them were on the gas, but they definitely didn't work out the other part of the wing.
00:26:11
Speaker
I do have to just make fun of a good friend of mine here. Throughout the pandemic, he kept ordering wings through DoorDash. And he didn't know the name of this company. It was just like neighborhood wing spot or something. And he kept telling me like, man, this like little local place has the best wings, but I can't find it anywhere.
00:26:30
Speaker
And I said, I have a feeling I know where it's coming from. Ask the door dash driver when he gets to your house where he stopped to get those wings for you. It was fucking Applebee's because during the pandemic, no one wanted fucking Applebee's. If you're ordering out, you're going to order not Applebee's. So they changed their name on the app so that you'd order their wings.
00:26:49
Speaker
And he raved about him for months until I- The wings were between perfectly acceptable to actually quite good. Best ever. I think your friend needs to explore some other wings. I agree.
00:27:04
Speaker
But they're good. They were the best thing that they had. But like we actually there was one slight mix up with the order. And so we also ordered a couple of kids meals because that's one thing is they have six dollar kid meals and you can get like fettuccine alfredo, a burger and fries. Of course, we're going to get a couple of kids meals if I'm doing just takeout anyway, they don't I'm wearing a wedding ring. They can I'm driving a soccer mom type of car is the situation I got like they're going to make their assumptions and I'm not going to stop them from from those.
00:27:34
Speaker
And we got one extra kids meal that we did not order. And it was chicken fingers, and they were actually inedible. And they came with chicken fingers and mozzarella fingers, also or mozzarella sticks, both actually inedible, we actually threw them away.
00:27:51
Speaker
Surprisingly enough, both of those things are Seth Rollins' favorite items from the Applebee's. I also feel like he does order that from Applebee's. He eats it, but then he, he self-flagellates afterwards, like the antagonist from, uh, the DaVinci code, where he's just like, no, Seth, you did all this CrossFit and then you ate fatty McFat fat Rollins.
00:28:20
Speaker
He got that, though, from Moxley. Moxley doesn't have to do anything to just start doing it, though. They would just, in road trips, he was just like, what are you doing? He's like, I'm blatant. He's like, well, don't get it on the back seat. This is a rental. Yeah. Who do you think has the most refined palate of the current WWE roster based on what you saw at the Royal Rumble? Because we know Seth's eating chicken fingers at Applebee's. Who's going out for the nice meal?
00:28:49
Speaker
Well, I mean, I think an obvious one would be Cody, right? I mean, we already talked, he's kind of, that's one of his sticks. He's wearing that pink suit everywhere during his last year in AEW, you know, he's styling and profiling. He's not afraid to leave a healthy tip, I bet. And he kind of wants to be seen at nice places. So I think he's near the top of the list. I bet Pat McAfee,
Wrestlers' Eating Habits and Event Critiques
00:29:19
Speaker
I bet, you know, travel the football team. I think he probably learned, you know, some fine dining, like those poor rookie linemen that had to take out everybody. He would live up. And then you've got our old pal Jizz, who only knows how to fuck up a golden corral bathroom. Yeah. He like is intimidated by Applebee's. He's like, I don't know what to wear. I don't know if I have enough buttons in my entire wardrobe.
00:29:49
Speaker
And he's like, plus the Golden Corral has a chocolate fondue fountain. Like what am I going to, you could, you could put some of that in your pockets to go, you know, take a little home. So I'm going to take a little bit of a left turn here. We go to Golden Corral with Nick Gage. What do you think, what do you think Gage is coming back from round one on his plate at the Corral?
00:30:12
Speaker
And what's he saying? I feel like Nick Cage would love it. I feel like Nick Cage probably doesn't go to Golden Corral a lot, but I feel like you would blow his mind with enthusiasm if you took him there. I don't know why this is what's coming to my head, but I feel like there's gonna be a lot of mac and cheese and mashed potatoes. I feel like the meat is gonna be light on that, but right now he's getting into shape. We don't see what he eats. That's true. That's hard to say. I mean, maybe now he's like a broccoli and chicken guy. Maybe he's on the Hugh Jackman Wolverine diet.
00:30:43
Speaker
That'd be something. Nick Gage against Hugh Jackman, WrestleMania weekend. We announced it here first. It's in Hollywood. I did see, uh, our friend Tegg sent us a tweet or a story that somebody told about Reese or like maybe over the summer, people were on a road trip, like doing wrestling stuff. Nick Gage was with him and he had never been to a Sonic.
00:31:07
Speaker
And he was asking the driver's girlfriend, like, what kind of food does Sonic have? And they're like, oh, kind of everything. He's like, they got ice cream. And she's like, yeah. He goes, they got ice cream with Reese's in it. And she goes, yeah. And he's like, got really excited and got a Reese's blizzard or flurry, whatever the fuck. Sonic's Reese's blast, I think, is the Sonic one. Hmm.
00:31:32
Speaker
But either way, we're a half hour in. We should probably talk wrestling at some point. I mean, fuck. Unless you want to talk about Hardy first. Well, I was going to say, what was the promotion for Hardy during the press conference? Did he participate in the post-show press conference? He was not there. And I don't know if you've read anything. He'd been killed by that point. The Peacock people had actually put him out by that.
00:32:02
Speaker
So all the word coming out from like all of the dirt sheets is that everyone backstage was like pretty unhappy with that Hardy performance. Everyone in front of the stage and in the stands and watching at home were also really disappointed. But again, for me, it's like they always do this thing where they announce these. I mean, they don't always do it, but they do it a couple of times a year. Usually at Mania, they announce it. And it's just like, I guess we have to do this.
00:32:31
Speaker
But I think the problem with him is you put that before or after the men's rumble, I don't think anybody talks about it. But when you put it before the main event, like almost four hours into the show and it's just like, I just want to fucking see Sammy Zane and Kevin Owens and Roman fucking reigns in the USOs. Right. Like I've literally Cody won three hours ago. And now I've just been waiting for this.
00:32:59
Speaker
I've just been waiting for this. And now at least the other stuff was wrestling. And honestly, we're skipping over a lot. It was mostly quite enjoyable wrestling, right? The women's rumble was great, I thought. And I really liked it. So it's like that.
00:33:17
Speaker
doesn't feel like it's dragging at the time, but then as soon as it's over, you're like, okay, Mountain Dew pitch black happened, women's title match happened, men's are a weapon, women's, all we got left is the big one, right? The one that everybody wants to see. But no, it's hardy. And not even-
00:33:35
Speaker
No, that's why I got a couple funny messages from our buddy Matt that said, I think one is he said, man, can you imagine having to go up in front of 51,000 people when you're the seventh best guy at karaoke? Like, yeah, it was
00:33:53
Speaker
And what was so odd about it, too, it wasn't like he was at the top of a stage where they could just quickly do this and get the fuck out. They had to tear all the ropes off the ring to get his shit in there. Him do this and then reassemble the ring. And it was at first I thought maybe it was like he didn't have monitors. So I'm like, he can't hear how shitty this is. And I actually felt a little bad for him.
00:34:19
Speaker
Yeah. But then after the performance, he pulled out two ear monitors so he absolutely could hear what was happening. Yeah. And body language wise, you could just kind of tell he didn't give us somewhere between he didn't give a shit to he was actively trying to bomb. So I don't know what the story is with that because like that's honestly was my thing where I don't know who he is. I just hear it's country rock.
00:34:42
Speaker
of a guy I've never heard of. I'm ready for it to not be good, but I'm a music guy. I like music. I've even heard music in different scenarios that I've gone on to like. And I was- I think in every genre there is at least something worth listening to. And country rock doesn't sound explicitly bad, right? Like if you get a good, like there's a lot of DNA shared between country and rock, but I wouldn't classify what he did as either.
00:35:11
Speaker
It was trash. And Chris told me it was important for us to pull up the lyrics to Hardy's Sold Out, the song they performed, and us go through these lyrics. Do you want to go through them together? I have them pulled up right here. Sure. I'll pull them up on my other screen, but you can get started. What's the name of the song again, Hardy? Sold Out by Hardy. And is that spelled in the NWA way?
00:35:43
Speaker
just just the traditional traditional you can't find any Mountain Dew pitch black at the store because it is sold out all right I got the lyrics up myself here gold records on my sheetrock
00:35:58
Speaker
Not bad for a boy from Mississippi. Yeah, I can buy a Maybach. Maybach? What the fuck's that? Maybach. I've got it for the rhyming, I would think. But I'm still in my F-150. Okay, so yeah, it's I guess a nice car, a nice truck. Oh yeah, Maybach is like a sports car. Yeah. Okay. The rappers talk about them.
00:36:21
Speaker
Okay. Okay. Well, now I'm putt of the week for not knowing. Hardly already clinched putt of the week before we ever, you know, or Seth Rollins. I don't know. There's a lot of choices.
00:36:34
Speaker
And my last name is a whole lot bigger than I thought it'd be. A lot of things change, except one thing, me. What does that mean? Any of that. His, his last name is bigger. It's not a big last name. It's not long. It's hardy. Like it's a, it's a store. There's a, I mean, I don't think he wrote this specifically for wrestling, but Hardy is a, you know, a pretty historic name in the wrestling community at this point.
00:37:01
Speaker
Yeah, but you'd think if it was, they're not going to want to talk about Hardee's in a positive way on a WWE broadcast when we've got a Hardy wrestling on YouTube for the competition.
00:37:14
Speaker
And I mean, so this is always thing like I'm always like, because you see thing with like Bad Bunny and I wasn't, or even like Machine Gun Kelly was doing music and then he finds out like, oh, like he's actually famous. Hardy's not actually famous, right? Like, so I Googled and I saw that he had performed recently with Morgan Wallen, who, if you don't know Morgan Wallen, he is a, he is an inward guy. He's one of those white guys that says the inward. All right.
00:37:42
Speaker
And he got canceled, but, uh, the country music community is like, he is not canceled to us. He can play a stadium. So this dude's playing the inward guys playing baseball stadiums all summer. And I think there's already guys playing with him. By the way, I will give you a thousand dollars cash right now. If without looking it up, you can tell me where Hardy is from Mississippi.
00:38:10
Speaker
I'm going to need a city though. It is, it is Mississippi. Biloxi? He is from Philadelphia, Mississippi. Of course. He always tells people he's from Philly unless he's national. That just sounds like a place that whose claim to fame is somehow featured in an episode of Diners, Drive-Ins and Dives.
00:38:38
Speaker
You can definitely get a good po' boy there. Yeah. Sure. I'm still the same old redneck fuck. Don't give a damn. Ain't afraid to throw a dead buck on my Instagram. God. Grain alcohol in my cup, got the whole house, wall to wall, and I still ain't sold out.
00:39:02
Speaker
So again, I can't get over this. I'm actually looking. It legitimately was number four. On the billboard charts when it came out, number one in the country charts and number one in the rock charts for January, late January. So I guess we're the putts of the week. I mean, he's still the part of the week because even if he's actually I think like.
00:39:29
Speaker
There is good country and there is bad country, and I would say a fair amount of bad songs get a lot of airplay on the radio.
00:39:37
Speaker
Yeah. I mean, when that's the only thing you're hearing on the radio, then eventually you like it. Like if I heard this song eight or nine times, I bet I'd start to sing it in my head a little bit. Well, and I think we all know it like the history of like payola schemes with radio and stuff like that. I'm sure that's happening with the modern streaming era era, right? Where they're just like, hey, Spotify for the people not paying for premium and can't control their own playlists. Throw a little hardy in there every third song, you know?
00:40:06
Speaker
But yeah, I got to get those numbers up. I didn't the the I I still ain't sold out. I think we you'd hit that, right? Yeah. So I can't imagine what you would consider this performance if not. You know, a pretty. Pretty clear sellout moment by any definition.
00:40:29
Speaker
You mean playing the Mountain Dew sponsored Royal Rumble professional wrestling event that's at the Alamo Dome? He's a small underground boy from Philadelphia, Mississippi. He's just driving around in his F-150, apparently drunk. He's got a big last name and he could have a Maybach.
00:40:50
Speaker
You don't really need to know that, but he'll make sure you know it. Cause he's not a sellout, but he could drive a Maybach anytime he wants to. I'm not selling out, but let's just say my song was number one on the pop music charts last week. It was him and the red hot chili peppers on that list. He's not a sellout though. So wait, let's get it.
00:41:16
Speaker
yeah middle finger to sky buddy that's right i don't sprinkle dixie crystal on my halftime yeah keep in your crowd i'll be your outcast what does that mean no idea but i want to get the meth i'll be country till i'm dead that's on my last name so again last name i gotta look up like country music hardy is he somebody's
00:41:42
Speaker
It's just him comes up when I go there. I think it's because we're going to associate him with country music. Like that's, Hardy means country music. Hardy means, motherfucker, you're talking to wrestling fans. Hardy, I have to, what is? But even country music fans, isn't that like offensive? Where it's just like, you know, what name is the most synonymous with country music? And it's like, oh, yeah.
00:42:07
Speaker
that guy that just released that pop album and played on WWE on the Mountain Dew show. That Mountain Dew boy, you know that new 30 year old Dew boy? He's the country of silly dyes. So Dixie Crystals according to Urban Dictionary is crystal meth. I was 1000% certain of that without having to Google it.
00:42:32
Speaker
What's on what does I don't sprinkle Dixie? I think I'm not smart enough for this song, to be honest. I think like I know in school, like we've had to break down like Shakespeare and stuff. This is this might be an iamic pentameter. I am not sure. And I.
00:42:48
Speaker
So Garrett, you know, you're a father now. So I feel really like welcome to being old. Right. I'm a couple of years older than you. And I just got to say at one point, one of my time honored traditions is I would like at the end of the year, because I would like I saw myself drifting further and further away from like hip hop music, which I really celebrated a lot when I was younger. And like pop music, you'll just hear in day to day life. Right. So you never fully lose track of pop music.
00:43:15
Speaker
But I lost track of, so I would actually look up every year at the end of the year, I'd look up whatever the top 20 most critically acclaimed rap albums. And I would listen to a couple tracks from each one. And there was a certain point where I was like, none of these make any sense. Because it's all now when you search a song, first thing comes up is the YouTube video with the lyrics on by default.
00:43:38
Speaker
And it's just like, these are all just random statements, not even full sentence fragments. They're random sentence fragments that sometimes kind of rhyme, but is not any cogent human language.
00:43:55
Speaker
I don't want to be lumped in with that yet because I still listen to a fair amount of new music. But do I understand what they're saying? And we're on country music here, Garret. So again, it's a slipping slide, right? So it doesn't all happen at all. Starting in like the most basic understanding of like, right. I got my blue jeans. I take a picture of a dead deer and I gram it. I don't put crystal meth on my halftime.
00:44:23
Speaker
Right. And it's halftime. And it's two exceedingly white individuals. We kind of go into hip hop music even when we were younger, kind of knowing we would have to learn some of what they're saying. Where is this? I don't like again, I get I've never heard crystal meth called Dixie Crystal, but like I read it. That's the first thing that came to my mouth. I think I understand the words.
00:44:47
Speaker
is halftime is penis hole. I don't put crystal meth in my penis hole. Is that, but why would he be on a WWE show if he doesn't, or maybe he doesn't put crystal meth on my halftime.
00:45:05
Speaker
Maybe somebody is like somebody listening is just screaming right now. Like you fucking puds. This is what this means. I listened to Hardy. You're an asshole. You're wrong. That performance was good. Talk about wrestling. So that's the thing is, again, I think 47 minutes you and I are objective lovers of music just objectively. So I cannot understand something and still enjoy it.
00:45:30
Speaker
Right? That performance was complete dog shit. I'm even willing to say if I fire up the YouTube video of this, I might find the song acceptable. I don't think so because they played a couple little clips of it prior to him playing, so I don't think I would like it, but I'd be open to trying it. Whereas I will never watch that live performance again. I'm more likely to watch
00:45:56
Speaker
I signed up for a year of Peacock for $2 a month, and I prepaid, and I might still cancel Peacock after that. So you know, this is one of those like triple Hs back in the locker room before the show, like, I just want you guys all to know.
00:46:15
Speaker
One, thank you Applebee's. Two, absolutely still in charge. I don't know what you've read on the internet. I don't know what Meltzer's saying. I'm in charge. And somebody's like, what about Hardy? Did you do that? He's like, okay, well, I wanted to stick with Poppy. Poppy should have performed again. You know me, big Poppy fan. Poppy plays every show. Maybe Flo Rida here and there.
00:46:42
Speaker
We're in San Antonio. He's our flow rider. We'll remain our summer slam guy. We've signed him to a 10 year exclusive deal, but me into con completely on board with that. We've worked. If this company does get sold, they must honor the flow rider summer slam contract.
00:47:03
Speaker
At some point, he's like, I made a deal. It's OK. We had to sacrifice somebody to the Saudis. We're sending Hardy over. They think it's matter, Jeff, doing a DLC match. They have him used to like man, like who's the who's the guy or Mansour, but it's in an actual loser gets beheaded match.
00:47:36
Speaker
I'm actually, that's going to be the next thing. The Saudi prince is going to be like, I want Meltzer. I keep hearing, I want, I want Meltzer and I want him to do the young bucks at Bola thing and give me the five star right from the front row. I'm a goddamn Saudi prince.
00:47:58
Speaker
Okay, Meltzer 100% is absolutely a chicken strips at Applebee's kind of guy. If you send him over to Saudi Arabia, that guy's not gonna know what to eat for like three days. I think Meltzer, I'm picturing Meltzer in Saudi Arabia.
00:48:14
Speaker
to cover a big WWE show, he's absolutely at Applebee's. And even then, he's getting the chicken fingers, but no fries, because those are too exotic. Oh, he's not dipping in ketchup either, because he's afraid that it's going to be different ketchup than at home. He brings his own ketchup from home.
00:48:37
Speaker
Which he could only bring because he flew private on Venz's jet. That's a liquid that's not available in coach. The Saudi prince actually brought him one bottle of ketchup from every country in the world, but Meltzer only will bring the one.
00:48:52
Speaker
that literally is from his mom's basement. She keeps some extra storage. She goes to Sam's club and buys like a giant crate of ketchup bottles once a year. And that's the only place he'll get it from. And if he doesn't like the first drop, she just returns, she just destroys the entire thing and has to buy another one.
00:49:12
Speaker
And then I think, you know, cause he's going to be there by himself and he's working, right? So he has his computer, but I definitely feel like Meltzer, like he doesn't have like an iPad or, or like a Mac laptop. He has a full like 1996 desktop computer. Floppy dead. Adele. Adele. And just sitting on the table outside the bar at Applebee's.
00:49:41
Speaker
And the bar at Applebee's, which in Saudi Arabia could probably only serve like chocolate milk. It's a, it's a milk bar. I don't know. Lactose might hurt his tummy. Oh, he, he wears a mask, not for the COVID, um, to avoid the milk vapors that can, he definitely at least has a lactose sensitivity. I don't know if he's full intolerant, but he definitely has some kind of sensitivity and he'll definitely still get sick.
00:50:12
Speaker
from the chicken fingers at Applebee's in Jetta. I want you to know we are nearly an hour into this episode and the only match that has been discussed was loosely the pitch black match.
00:50:32
Speaker
Why don't we go? Let's go further off topic. Yeah, let's get out of here.
VR Experiences in Sports and Wrestling
00:50:37
Speaker
I mentioned, you know, as you know, as you know, Garrett, I have a minor work-related interest in virtual reality, right? My company, we dab. We dab. I'm a dabbler. So I noticed that there was this thing that they were doing
00:50:57
Speaker
NBA games in VR on meta quest and it's in this app Called x stadium Right, so I download that app. I got a quest headset I download that x stadium app and then last night. I'm like cool. I'm gonna I'm gonna watch the Cavs game in VR and um
00:51:21
Speaker
It sucked, it wasn't good. It's like you're just kind of in this like virtual movie theater and they're just playing the game on normal 2D in front of you. So it's like the 3D is like the way a screen is technically in three dimensions when you're physically in a movie theater. And I don't get it, but, but, hold on, hold on. So don't watch NBA and VR.
00:51:52
Speaker
However, I go back to the menu and I see what else does X stadium have, right? Maybe the NBA thing. And right there in their feature section, all the way to the right. Slack versus Dolph Boy in XPW. No, it's the best of Hardy. And no.
00:52:17
Speaker
It's in a weird way. It's, it's, it is almost as bizarre though as schluck, uh, and DILF boy, it's triple mania, triple A's version of WrestleMania. And so it's there and I'm like, Oh shit. Okay.
00:52:39
Speaker
Let's check this out. And I loaded up the experience and I'm like, and I'm in that same theater, kind of like I am for the NBA game. And I'm like, oh shit, okay, this is a waste of time. But it's not, but it's not. While there is a screen, the screen is like all around you.
00:52:58
Speaker
And you quickly like during the entrances, you're kind of seeing it like normal 2D video of like it's cutting this. So I just kind of skip to an hour in and it's it's I got to look I got to look it up because I want to get the name right here. It's a six man I come into with Brian Cage. I noticed Brian Cage right right away. And apparently he's coming out with this team with a lucha dora named Estralita, who was I guess their valet for the evening.
00:53:28
Speaker
And as soon as they get to the ring, like they're physically entering the ring, it posts up that the view, which is in full VR, is of just the corner of one of the ring posts. And you actually are watching it as though you are like somebody waiting to get a tag in. Now here's the most intriguing part. So I mentioned Estrilita for a reason.
00:53:55
Speaker
So she comes in and Gary, you've watched wrestling before, right? Seen it, yeah. You wouldn't know it from this episode, but I've seen it. You drink down you at least, right? That gives you some, like, Applebee's Mountain. That's some context. Yeah. So wrestlers, though, you know, they often will do, like, the going to the top rope and kind of being like, yeah, yeah, yeah.
00:54:16
Speaker
So Estralita goes in and she's entering via the turnbuckle that we in virtual space are positioned as. Right. So again, just to give you the context, it's like you're stuck there. So if you, if you look around, you're looking around from that position, you can't move around the virtual space, but as you look around, everything remains in full virtual reality 3D and it looks perfect.
00:54:38
Speaker
So are you like the camera on top of the ring post in WWE that like moves around? Yeah, exactly. And I would liken it to I think it was a little lower. It was basically like, it felt like it was close to I view if you were literally standing on the apron waiting for waiting for the tag. So Esther Lita, when she comes in, she immediately
00:54:57
Speaker
just goes up to raise herself and pose for the crowd with her ass directly in your face. And there's a lot of ass there and not a lot of thing covering the ass. And I'm just like, this is it. Your wife comes in and it's on the TV. You've got goggles on. Your tongue is hanging out. You're drooling all over yourself. I'm just fully wearing a hoodie and a shirt up top with the VR headset and the little controller clickies.
00:55:26
Speaker
furiously masturbating with the other hand down. Which is what you were already doing in the Cavs game, just because you wanted to know what it was going to be like to jerk off court side. Exactly. And then she can just hear Mexican commentary, where she's like, my wife knows what Lucha Libre commentary sounds like. She's not like, oh, maybe he's watching a soccer game. She knows exactly what's going on.
00:55:58
Speaker
That's, oh my god, that... So highest possible recommendation, if you have a meta quest or other VR device that has Xstadium, I don't know whether that's like a meta app or whether they do it for multiple platforms.
00:56:21
Speaker
But if you can get x stadium in VR and it's free, you don't have to, you know, cause that's the thing is like, you can buy like full NBA league pass, all this stuff in there, but like the premium, the featured stuff is all free. You can watch all of the last night of triple mania in October, which has by the way, a lot of really good matches. Like it's actually just a show worth seeing. And if you have a VR headset, I'm being dead serious. I think that's the way to watch it.
00:56:46
Speaker
If you had held out a little longer, you might've gotten Brian Cage's donk right in your face. I'm going to come back and watch it. I just didn't have like three and a half hours to kill. I don't want to see Mexican hardy do a 15 minute mariachi. I was going to say it's a mariachi hardy. It's like mariachi fused with nu-metal or something.
00:57:16
Speaker
your company. By the way, everyone this week or every other podcast is talking about Sami Zayn and Roman Reigns, Cody. We take the biting stuff. We give the fans what they really want. Mountain Dew, Applebee's, Estralita,
00:57:34
Speaker
You know, the works. We told you we liked the rumble. Like, what else do you need to hear from us? Everybody knows it was a pretty good rumble. Maybe the only thing I would mention is that I personally booked the final three for that rumble. They picked the three people I give a shit about and made them all fight each other. Awesome. Of course, Walter, Cody, and Logan Paul. Yeah.
00:57:59
Speaker
But back to your, your VR. So I don't know what kind of poll you got at work, but I think you need to convince them. They need to run more tests in the wrestling space and that you live very close to the wrestling Mecca. They know where I live, right? I can get, if they can send me some hardware. So listen, maybe there's an ex stadium person listening.
00:58:28
Speaker
I DM me, right? Just go to Jimmy Lloyd's IMDB. Find me. Right. Send me, send me a DM. We'll hook it up. I'll give you my address. Send me some of the hardware. I'll send it back when I'm done. I'll set up in, in the lodge in boot in New Jersey. Well, we'll make it happen. Right. And that is about as authentic a wrestling, because that's the other thing is like, even with an NBA game, like I have so many ways to watch the NBA game already.
00:58:58
Speaker
Right. I got it on my TV. I can watch it on my phone. I can read about it in the newspaper the next day. Right. Talk about changing dimensions, reading about the newspaper. That's dimension warping. But like. And wrestling is the same way I can watch WrestleMania fucking anywhere. But that's the real authentic wrestling experience. We've got listeners from around the globe facts that have only heard the tale of Putin.
00:59:27
Speaker
We should be able to give them the authentic experience without having to buy a couple thousand dollar plane ticket from fucking Spain or wherever. I see we got listeners in Spain. I don't know who you are. You've never interacted with us, but you're there and you want to see Bhutan. You want to see Bhutan. And you know what? Even we want to see the Buffalo Wild Wings in West Virginia.
00:59:51
Speaker
Right. So again, and I'll, I'll pay the money. I'll take the effort to go to West Virginia and I will make it happen. Not, not for me. Right. Cause my wife won't let me do it for me, but if I'm doing it for the, for, for the community, I think we can make this happen.
01:00:11
Speaker
I guess I gotta get a VR headset. I'll tell you, you sold me a VR headset. I never had any interest in a VR headset, but I bought an Xbox just to play one Resident Evil game. Why wouldn't I buy a VR headset to watch this one match?
01:00:30
Speaker
You get an AW game soon, so you got that. And unfortunately, there is no VR add on for Xbox, but yeah, Mediquest is reasonably priced. You know, it's not it's not cheap, but it's not like a new computer or something at that level. Well, I mean, I'm going to look at a butt. I want to I want to feel like I'm really looking at that butt.
01:00:53
Speaker
Well, and you know what? Even when you look at a butt very closely, I don't know. You're you're you're presumably you've you've you've had some fairly close contact with your wife's posterior. I've seen her butt. Yeah, but I'm sure. But you're even then your head is like like your wife's butt is just the size of her butt. Whereas in Estrilita, it's as though in VR she's like 80 feet tall.
01:01:22
Speaker
the way you're seeing it. Oh, because that's the thought I managed. So it's kind of like the view eye-line wise as though you're sitting on the canvas, but it's like your ant man in the mini-drive comes sitting on there. Everything is just magnetic around you. So it's like a giant cosmic ass.
01:01:43
Speaker
that you see. I can see a religion being built. If just everybody just died that was over the age of three, and then children that didn't learn yet kind of just found our old artifacts and had to piece things together, and they found that, I could see them making a new religion about Estralita's ass.
01:02:10
Speaker
This really feels like not only
01:02:15
Speaker
have you discovered the best way to watch wrestling? You also have a pitch for Mexico to do a sequel remake of Honey, I Shrunk the Kids. We got a new Ant-Man movie coming out, right? Those things are making hundreds of millions, maybe billions, I don't know, it's a Marvel movie. Now's the time, Triple. And CMLL, you know, you're gonna just let Triple A just dominate here? They already got the Lucha Brothers.
01:02:44
Speaker
You know, they got Estrilita, and now they got a Head Start in VR.
Surprising Collaborations and Podcast Possibilities
01:02:50
Speaker
So speaking of, I feel like I saw this right before we started recording, and it just seemed like a good time to bring it up while we're on a similar topic. So, NWA's Facebook page, which for some reason I do follow, posted this, letting me know
01:03:11
Speaker
that Myra Diaz Gomez, which I presume is an NWA wrestler, is going to be the centerfold in February's Playboy. And Mandy Rose got fired for having kind of an OnlyFans, but Billy Corrigan is telling him, like, you got to get us all the promotion, you can get out there.
01:03:32
Speaker
And also, I didn't know this magazine still existed, Fax. I thought not only, I thought one, the magazine didn't exist, but I knew at a certain point they cut out nudity and just were releasing it like a men's magazine. I got a funny story about that.
01:03:47
Speaker
But before I get to that, I think what Billy Corgan is basically telling us is right. The whole aesthetic of his version of NWA has been basically we're doing Power Hour 1986 Crockett. That's the whole deal.
01:04:03
Speaker
This is clearly a sign he's going attitude era. This is where he where you had like a WWE diva every four months doing some nudie pic somewhere. So I think I think Corgan's going fully like you're gonna see the Godfather back in Val of Venus. You're gonna see a lot of those guys popping up in the NWA soon.
01:04:22
Speaker
So a conversation that had to have happened then is him being like, Tyris, cause I don't know what he sounds like in real life. I, I assume it sounds like you nailed it. Tyris, do you mind, um, hanging brain for the good of the company? I know you're a very conservative man, but it would really be good for business. Maybe. Yeah. I mean, Billy knows cause I assume if playboys still around play girls got to be in there with Tyris showing his balls.
01:04:53
Speaker
I presume, and Tyrus would be a big get for them, I think. You know, he's on Fox News. People don't know him from NWA. They know him from the Fox News. Which also, I just saw he who shall not be named is texting us. Is he free? Is he just watching AEW? Oh my god. Holy shit. Holy shit. What?
01:05:22
Speaker
You know what? I hope he's listening to this. We shouldn't tell him because welcome back to the podcast Chris makes. He's welcome back next week and forever because we what did we just I can't even say the words of what Chris sent this to us in all caps, folks. I don't even know if we're allowed to say this on the air. I think we are. We'll edit this out if we can't or we'll make some excuse to Chris of why you accidentally released it without editing it out.
01:05:50
Speaker
So we get a text from Chris, who we can say his name again. Apparently... The mayor of Bhutan works at my firm. We've got an end to Bhutan, guys. Well, and I know who I need to run against now, because that's been my life goal since I found out I want to be the mayor of Bhutan.
01:06:12
Speaker
I, you know, we'll feel them out and figure out are we friends and so are we joining forces with him or do we need to depose him? You meet up with the mayor of Bhutan and you say your life ends here. I just I just do the thing of like that Game of Thrones episode, the Mountain and the Viper, where they like challenge each other to a death duel. Like that's the immediate thing.
01:06:40
Speaker
Only I'm just I've just got some like Batman figures from the gaming store and the mock NWO title belt instead of like iron jeans. So I don't think we go a battle route on this.
01:06:57
Speaker
I think we embrace that we have a connection to Bhutan, and we get a day. I don't think anybody has done more to drive up tourism to Bhutan than this podcast. If this man knew how many hours we spent talking about his town. We were just talking about getting the VR setup. I feel like this is more plausible. I'll work my angle on the ends I got, right? Chris can start working on the mayor, get him on board.
01:07:26
Speaker
We know, we know we can get, I mean, Lauderdale doesn't even need to know, right? We can just, I'll send him a DM on Twitter. He's not going to stop us, right? We can do this however we need to. Why does Lauderdale want to stop us? I mean, I don't think he wants to stop us because he want to pick, because that's the thing is with this, you can't, you can't like make somebody require a fight login.
01:07:51
Speaker
Right. That's the whole thing is like, you kind of, you got to make it available. It's not the fight app in VR. It's the X stadium app. Well, I mean, Lauderdale usually makes the boot and shows available on YouTube. That's a great point. And I think YouTube also has VR. Like there is a YouTube VR app. You can do V. Oh man, we are on to something.
01:08:12
Speaker
Man, Chris, welcome back, buddy. It was I missed you while you were gone, but you popped right in at the end. You saved the day. You saved the town of Bhutan. You saved this friendship.
01:08:25
Speaker
You're, you know what? And now I got to think back about my imposter syndrome and leaving the podcast when Chris, you and I do this podcast together. We go, we're going over an hour here and Chris brings the biggest highlight of the night. He's not even on the show and he's, he's, he's our, our MVP. He's what we need something for what Chris is of whatever like the anti putt of the week is.
01:08:49
Speaker
Well, I'll say this. The three of us are a perfect match. You and I, Fax, we're like peanut butter and whiskey. We're the peanut butter and whiskey. Chris is the Mountain Dew pitch black that ties it all together and makes it drinkable.
01:09:14
Speaker
And those, those Spaniards are clearly some, cause the drinking age there is what, like 16. So they're probably like 13 year olds that are like, you know, cause you can probably get a glass of wine or a beer at 13, no problem in Spain, but like getting a mountain mountain dew and whiskey that you need a fake ID for. So we're, we're introducing some, some new concepts to them.
01:09:41
Speaker
So before, I know we're, I'm getting more wrestle texts that you aren't a part of, like a different person who's been on this podcast, I'm sorry, my friend John that I used to attend PWG with, you know, WrestleMania and everything's about to be in LA. And he's trying to plan out his wrestle weekend. This is gonna be his first big WrestleMania weekend, but he gets to sleep in his bed every night.
01:10:07
Speaker
but still go to all the shows, which is nice. And he just sent me this question that you and I do know the answer to, and I'll tell him he has to listen to the podcast to get the answer to this text. Hey, question about Effie's big gay brunch. Is there really brunch? Fex, is there really brunch at Effie's? Well, it depends on your definition of brunch. So assuming it's like big gay brunches I have attended,
01:10:35
Speaker
I would say no by my definition, but like they'll have maybe some donuts or like the old Spunk Meyer muffins in the shrink wrap that you can get at 7-Eleven. The past couple Chicago ones, they have a table filled with cold McDonald's. Oh, you're right. The cold McDonald's. Yeah, I do remember that from Chicago.
01:11:01
Speaker
which you know the gays had nothing to do with. Like, if anything like- Everything to do with. You know, do you think like- I don't know, man. That's-
01:11:13
Speaker
That's a it's a pretty embarrassing brunch, but technically there is food. I'd be willing to bet what it probably is, like, Effie has this idea and he's like, we're going to get mimosas going, you know, we're going to have an omelet station and we'll charge money, right? Because we got to pay these people to do it. Like, he's all these visions.
01:11:34
Speaker
And they're like, you know, when you go to a GCW show, you see a lot of like the wrestlers stuff like that are also helping running things. Right. Like the regulars. And you see Nick Gage and all the JCW shows in Bhutan, by the way. You see Nick Gage like agenting matches and stuff. And then they're definitely like, OK, who's who's going to like Effie's got to run the show. Right. The Big Game Brunch is Effie's day. He can't handle the actual brunch logistics, too. So so Lauderdale's got to assign that to somebody.
01:12:01
Speaker
It gets assigned to Jimmy Lloyd. You knew I was going there. It's assigned to Jimmy Lloyd, and Jimmy Lloyd literally just wakes up that day, strung out on Dixie Crystal, that he's jamming into his halftime. I almost ruined my computer. I was taking it. With Mountain Dew and whiskey.
01:12:27
Speaker
And then Jimmy Lloyd literally just gets to the arena. And like, Effie's just kind of like finishing up like his match, like working through it in the ring before the fans, like four doors. He just goes to Jimmy Lloyd and he's like, where's the omelet station? Where's the Belgian waffles? Like, where's the fucking mimosas?
01:12:47
Speaker
And he's just like, I'll be right back. And I just get some like. Two for breakfast burritos, sausage burritos, and a couple of big griddles. He comes back, there's big griddles, a couple of burritos, and a fucking like oven, like a fucking like rotisserie chicken that he grabbed at the Kroger next door.
01:13:17
Speaker
Fucking Jimmy Lloyd all hopped up on Dixie Crystal. And he just has a bunch of like Steel Reserve 40s and orange juice. He's like, that's mimosas, right? I don't know what you guys drink. I don't know what you gays drink. If he's like, mimosas? What? Everyone drinks mimosas. Everybody likes a mimosa, Jimmy.
01:13:39
Speaker
Yeah, and that was- Well, Robert De Niro didn't give me any of those on the set. You were fucking seven, asshole. Maybe less, because I saw that in, they're having a Jimmy Lloyd birthday party show in Vegas. He's turning, we talked about this and I forgot how old he was until I saw how old he turned- He's turning 27, is that right? He's turning 25. He's gonna be able to rent a car.
01:14:05
Speaker
Oh, my goodness. I swear to God, I thought he was fucking 42. Like we literally talked about it on the show. But even then, I still can't possibly be that young. Even then, I'm going at least high 20s. Wow. And when is this show? Because I got to book my flight.
01:14:31
Speaker
Oh my God. We honestly, we do need another Wrestle weekend in Vegas. Those are, they aren't even, they're fun. Like I don't even do anything crazy. Besides attend a bunch of wrestling shows and go see Pitbull.
01:14:44
Speaker
Well, it's also like when you have like a big wrestling weekend and you see wrestlers in the wild at them, it's typically doing wrestling related things, right? There's like some con, you see a wrestler from a bigger promotion watching a show of a let lower Bruce. Everything is very wrestling related. And the thing that was great about Vegas is
01:15:08
Speaker
just being in a casino and wandering around the casino and just being like, oh, there's like MJF going to the buffet, you know, there's fricking Lance Archer playing roulette, right? You know, there's Jimmy Havoc doing God knows what, but it seems like someone should stop him, whatever he's doing.
01:15:32
Speaker
And then you've got still my favorite Vegas wrestler story of the last whatever, is Great O'Con, where he's a national hero, saved somebody from sex trafficking in Japan, and then goes to celebrate and is just having like a fucking hangover, debaucherous weekend in Las Vegas. And it's all these pictures of him like kneeling down, grabbing butts, like consensually, it looks like, you know, but. He's the Batman of Japan at that point.
01:16:01
Speaker
What a cool guy. We also had a pretty badass story when we had the cab driver telling us about driving Cody to Moxley's house. And this was before Moxley actually came out. And this guy wasn't even a wrestling fan. He's like, I don't know, there's this guy, he was like Dean something from WWE. He said he was on TV all the time, but I don't know. And he's like, and this other guy, he knew Cody. He's like, oh, it was like Dusty Rhodes' son. And we're like, yeah, that's a thing.
01:16:31
Speaker
And now that guy's going to main event WrestleMania facts. You won the Royal Rumble. I don't know if you all heard. And that's and that's right. That's not let's not put too fine a point on it because this is about current wrestling because that's what we talk about on this show. And that's what we've been doing consistently this entire episode. Cody Rhodes will be main eventing WrestleMania before CM Punk does. I love it. That's the world we live in.
01:16:59
Speaker
And Tony Khan didn't even have to buy WWE to make it happen.
01:17:04
Speaker
Aside from that, I know we are like really running down on time right now. I do want to say, like we quickly mentioned it. I did love the women's Royal Rumble. I loved that it didn't involve a bunch of legacy wrestlers. I loved that half the people on the roster, I was like, who the hell is this? Found out it's NXT people. And honestly, all of them got really good time and it got good spots. Like got me more excited to see people I didn't know wrestle more.
01:17:33
Speaker
It is a weird dissonance, though, to see so many NXT women there and then Braun breakers not in the men's rumble. It's like, wait, what? Like, what? Why? I would say just generally. I.
01:17:46
Speaker
We can talk about, I think we, Chris wants to talk about it more. So maybe we'll talk about the turn and Sammy next week. Cause I thought it was solid, but we all knew it was happening. And I thought the delivery execution was kind of lackluster. If I'm being honest, people are talking about it. Like it was the biggest home run in the history of wrestling angles. And I think the setup was some of the biggest home run that the WWE has done in a very long time, if not ever, the actual execution.
01:18:12
Speaker
And let's talk about that next week, but the actual rumble matches, I think both matches, men and women were both really solid, but I have the same criticism. The reason that I think both are not in that breath of like top tier rumbles in my mind is.
01:18:29
Speaker
Neither one had any drama down the finish. It was clear as fucking day who were winning both of those rumbles. A, I would have successfully picked both very easily before the show started. But certainly by the time you get to like the number 30 has come in and it's down to the last people, it was super obvious who was winning both of those.
01:18:50
Speaker
And that's never great. And particularly for me, it's also I didn't actually know Sami Zayn wasn't in the Rumble. I have all of what I was reading. Like, I don't read WWE.
Royal Rumble Expectations and Outcomes
01:18:59
Speaker
I don't watch WWE shows. So everywhere I was reading was implying, oh, like Sami, like including mainstream websites, right, are talking about Sami Zayn has to win the Royal Rumble. So I went ahead and assumed he was in the Royal Rumble.
01:19:13
Speaker
And that was kind of a kick in the nads when he wasn't there. But then it's like, Cody comes in at 30 and it's like, and beats Walter, who has the biggest run in the history of the rumble. And I, by the way, I love Walter. I love Walter having that run. Walter looked like a million bucks. I hate that. It's like every couple of years, the rumbles got to get a little bit longer. So somebody else can set the new record where it's just like every year you see who comes in one and two and you're like,
01:19:41
Speaker
You quickly do that math in your head of like, could one of these guys break the record? You're like, oh, oh, shit. It's. It's going to be. Who's the third thought? It's going to be Jake Paul next year. Where does he Jake Paul come in and it's going to be or Logan Paul? Sorry. It's going to be. Oh, man, he's he's breaking. He's breaking that Walter record and Walter. Get Logan Paul versus Ricochet at WrestleMania. Like I knew, right?
01:20:11
Speaker
I mean, they have to sponsor it. That's what I want to know. Who's going to sponsor Mountain Dew Live Wire? Something got to be something wacky, something crazy, maybe a little, maybe a spicy chip. They've been Doritos spicy blue cheese ranch. That could be a contender. OK, it is time to get out of here. We've done all we could do this week. I do have to say, though, women's rumble.
01:20:41
Speaker
My goth mommy won and that's all I needed. Yeah. I mean, I have less notes for that one. I would say then I think they had also less options. Like, whereas the men's rumble was because like there was a clear other options for guys that could have been potential winners. Whereas the women's, like we all wanted her to win. There wasn't really a very obvious other choice.
01:21:05
Speaker
And goth mommy's gonna beat the fuck out of sha sha at WrestleMania, right? Like. I think so. I mean, that's a way to get me to watch. All right. Well, what have we learned today, folks? Mountain Dew. Mountain Dew. Applebee's. Applebee's. Children in a post-apocalyptic future worshiping a luchadora's ass as their lord and savior.
Podcast Challenges and Conclusion
01:21:34
Speaker
We've learned about Putin. We've learned, we've talked about Putin. We've learned about Putin. We don't know the name of the mayor. People could probably be Googling. Chris was fired. Chris was weird hired. He saved the day. Honestly, in the span of an hour, Chris, he basically survived the whole Royal Rumble. Yes.
01:21:56
Speaker
How do you think we did? We didn't even get into the curse of this podcast, by the way. Chris was cripplingly ill yesterday, but like a trooper tried to make it so that the three of us could all record it together.
01:22:07
Speaker
But then Garrett had a sick child. So you got tired. You're like, I don't know about this. Then around 10 10 30 at night, all of us are like, fine, let's just fucking do it. Right. It's the only time all of us can do it. And then your cat jumped on the stove while the burner was left on accidentally and burned its little mittens.
01:22:30
Speaker
There's a cat running around that smelled like burnt hair. I felt awful and was the internet's like, yeah, it'll be fine. You just got to pour cold water on it. Oh, and there's a literal fire alarm going off. It's, it's fine.
01:22:48
Speaker
That's my wife telling me I need to come and eat dinner. Oh, and then I had a tooth hole out today. Not a tooth, but a crown before we were going to start recording it. A crown came out. I'm glad we got this episode in because it seemed like we were cursed. Oh, the smoke alarm is about to go off.
01:23:05
Speaker
All right, guys, well, Fax has to eat dinner and we'll be back next time. And you know what? Maybe we'll talk about wrestling. Maybe we'll talk about Chili's. Who knows? Great review. Subscribe. Follow us on pre-determined podcast on Instagram. Follow us. My name is at Gartet on Instagram. Fax is Jimmy Lloyd's IMDB page. You can also find me at the Crystal Pepsi MySpace page. They're looking into sponsoring us in this VR in Buntin Endeavors. I just got I just got a text.
01:23:35
Speaker
Well, he'll be doing the crystal Pepsi. I'll be doing the, the, the crystal sugar, Dixie crystal or whatever. All right, everybody have a good week. We'll see you next time. Hit our goddamn music.