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Self-Reflective Parenting | The Positively Healthy Mom Podcast with Carrie Lingenfelter image

Self-Reflective Parenting | The Positively Healthy Mom Podcast with Carrie Lingenfelter

The Positively Healthy Mom
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Welcome back to another nourishing episode of The Positively Healthy Mom Podcast!
In this heartfelt conversation, your host Laura Olinger is joined by Carrie Lingenfelter—speech therapist, mindful parenting advocate, and host of the Heart to Heart Parents Podcast—as they explore what it really takes to raise kids with presence and compassion, while staying connected to yourself as a parent.

Carrie shares:
✅ Her personal journey from perfectionism to presence in motherhood
✅ How childhood wounds and generational patterns show up in everyday parenting
✅ The concept of the “capacities bucket” and how to protect your energy
✅ How to shift from control to connection with your kids
✅ Simple practices like meditation, active self-care, and letting go of outside opinions

Whether you're raising toddlers, tweens, or teens, this episode is packed with powerful reflections and practical tools to support your parenting journey with more calm, confidence, and care.

🎧 Listen to Carrie’s podcast: Heart to Heart Parents
🌐 Learn more: hearttoheartlife.com

👉 If this episode resonates with you, don’t forget to like, subscribe, and share it with the moms in your circle!

Follow us for more:
📘 Facebook: Positively Healthy Coaching
📸 Instagram: @positivelyhealthycoaching

#PositivelyHealthyMom #MindfulParenting #MomBurnoutRecovery #ConsciousMotherhood #CarrieLingenfelter #HeartToHeartParents #MomSelfCareMatters #ParentingSupport #BreakTheCycle #PeacefulParenting

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Transcript

Introduction to Positive Parenting Podcast

00:00:00
Speaker
Welcome to the Positively Healthy Mom podcast, where positive parenting meets wellbeing.
00:00:09
Speaker
Hello everyone. Welcome to today's episode of the Positively Healthy Mom. I'm your host, Laura Olinger, teen and parent wellbeing coach. And I'm so excited to introduce you to Keri Lingenfelter. who is also a podcast host. Her podcast is Heart to Heart Parents Podcast, and she is coming to us from the Boulder, Colorado area. So Keri, welcome to the podcast today.
00:00:33
Speaker
Hey, thanks so much for having me. I'm so excited to connect with you today. ah yeah, I'm really excited to

Keri's Transition and Parenting Realizations

00:00:39
Speaker
share. And know the first thing I wanted to bring up is kind of your personal journey of, you know, you were an educator and a speech therapist and then became a mom. And you mentioned having feelings of anxiety with that.
00:00:54
Speaker
So tell us like where that was coming from and and how you handled that. Yeah, 100%. Anxiety, yes, that was a piece of the puzzle. So I um i was a speech therapist. I worked with birth to three-year-olds, so I would go into houses and work with the families.
00:01:11
Speaker
And it's really interesting because as I was working in um families with families, I would notice so often the kids would not be talking. That's usually what I was there for.
00:01:24
Speaker
And I would be trying to help the parents connect with the kids. And as I was there, i would notice this pattern in so many families. It was the parents really, really wanting the kids to speak.
00:01:35
Speaker
And i would really work with the parents to help them understand the stress that they were feeling and then putting onto their children, like, speak now. I really need you to speak. I really need you to answer me. And so helping the parents to just lessen that pressure that they were feeling for themselves and then for their kids.
00:01:53
Speaker
So that was really interesting, and I reflect back on that as a mom now because um as I became a parent, I definitely thought, I've got this husband. You can sit in the back seat. I'm a child specialist. Like, I know everything that's coming. And then as soon as they laid my son, who is now turning 10 on my chest, my world was rocked. And he looked into my eyes with these bright blue eyes, which I did not know was coming because we both have Hazel.
00:02:20
Speaker
And I was like, what do I know? i do not know anything. um And my husband and I, we quickly ah tried to dive into this box of parenting perfection that we thought we had to do. We tried to follow all the rules. We tried to get on the sleep schedules. We read all the books.
00:02:38
Speaker
I think my scariest one for me was what to expect when expecting. It just gave me all list of everything that could go wrong, which just got me into my mind more and more and more.
00:02:49
Speaker
So as my son came or came to be here, he was so sensitive. And um things like cloth diapers that I thought I had to have to be the perfect crunchy mom in the area I live um he would wake up every hour because every time he would go to the restroom he would feel it in the cloth diaper so my husband and i had to start learning how to follow our child how to connect with our own selves to see how we could parent our son the best and he would tell us when he needed to sleep he would tell us when he needed to eat he didn't need the 800 sleep gadgets we could we could connect with him and start to follow our own hearts in our journey of parenting
00:03:31
Speaker
So that was really something we learned right at the start.

Parenting Lessons and Podcast Journey

00:03:34
Speaker
But because we are humans, we tend to go back to that fear-based feeling, right? We want children to grow up to be the best versions of themselves. And so for a former recovering perfectionist, um it's having those routines and having those things that you can turn to in your everyday life.
00:03:55
Speaker
having those moments, that mind, body, heart connection of understanding when we're stressed out, understanding when we're getting anxious, understanding when our um emotions are coming up towards our kids that are maybe fear-based.
00:04:09
Speaker
um So as I went on this journey, and I'm still on this journey because my kids are seven and 10, we're still and learning together, ah having that root of what I can come back to. So that led me to start Heart to Heart Parents 15 months ago. and It's been really cool because it's really evolved. I feel like it was very um mindful and conscious parenting based. And I've just been along the journey of, um I don't know if you've heard of the podcast Telepathy Tapes. It's been really interesting. It's like this new...
00:04:41
Speaker
um ah This new podcast that was ah released and it's geared toward parents or it's geared toward everyone, but it's helped parents um helping to share the story of parents raising neurodiverse kiddos. so um So it's been really cool as I have been sharing my journey with everyone and talking about tools and things that work in our house.
00:05:04
Speaker
up comes telepathy tapes, which also is very aligned in what I've been finding with my kids, with the mindfulness tools for myself and for my kids and all these pieces. So I'm not sure why I mentioned that, but it's it's been fun to see other things, other projects coming to be that are having this amazing following

Struggles with Control and Connection at Dinner

00:05:21
Speaker
now. i'm like, wow, there's a lot of parents out there learning how to see the gifts in our kids.
00:05:26
Speaker
Yeah, yeah. and And so I like how you brought up the mind body part, because that's how I know, like, I can feel it in my body when I start to, um it's almost a feeling of wanting to control the outcome, where we have something in our mind of how we want it to go, like we have an image or a vision. And yeah So my, I would, I'm not a recovering perfectionist. I was never a perfectionist. I've always been a disaster.
00:05:53
Speaker
I'm very, I'm very okay with chaos and disasters. You know, i have four kids and a dog and there's a lot of disasters, right? It's just kind of like managing, managing the chaos. And I, I really do thrive in that.
00:06:05
Speaker
But when I find myself going into the mode that I think that you're describing is, um here's my example. Last night at dinner, um We all sat down together and everyone was just like a little tired. And I always have a vision in my head that I want dinner to be like a fun time and like a connecting time. It doesn't have to be fun, but just like connected.
00:06:26
Speaker
And because when I grew up, my... um And hopefully my mom and dad aren't listening to this particular episode. However, dinner for me, like doesn't have like positive memories on it. It just, you know, it felt like a serious, stressful time. And so that's why I created this vision in my head of like, I want my dinner to be relaxing for my kids. I want it to be a connecting time.
00:06:49
Speaker
And I could tell like, sometimes when I'm just like forcing it a little bit too much, like when I'm asking the questions and and, you know, they're like, you know, they feel like they're getting interviewed or, or um you know, kind of ah focused on a little bit too much. And so that's when I realized like I can feel it. And so what I'll do is i just kind of like take that deep breath and I kind of just sit back and I'm like, why am I trying to control the situation? Why don't I just let it or organically unfold?
00:07:18
Speaker
Because we don't always all talk to each other. Sometimes my sons just have their conversation. Daughters have their conversation. i kind of jump in here or there. It doesn't have to be this formula that I have it created in my mind where we're all talking right together.
00:07:32
Speaker
And so um like, what is your thought about that? Like, how do you reflect on that in your own experience? I, you know, that comes back so much to an inner child peace, I think, because in that situation, you're picturing an outcome that you're wanting to have. And then also maybe last night you were understanding, like, I don't need to be in control of it, right? I don't have to have control, excuse me, of what this moment is going to look like.
00:08:00
Speaker
I can live in the moment. i can let it happen organically. it doesn't have to look like the scenario that I'm thinking of. So I think for me, i would reflect back on What is it in me that is needing control of this situation? Yeah. What is it in me?
00:08:16
Speaker
is is my but Is my heart still going to be filled if we if I'm seeing a human connection here? What is it that I'm looking for in that scenario? Am I looking for everybody's connecting together? Am I looking for...
00:08:30
Speaker
um where we all have, there's some people that have like a routine that they do every night. So they say, I think it's like the rose and the thorn. So what was the rose of your day? what was the I love that idea, but I've never been able to do that.
00:08:44
Speaker
I don't know. think we always just steer into a different path and we just kind of organically go with it. So I think if you if you had something that was like that, the rose and the thorn, and it's it's almost like, I feel like that scripted version.
00:08:59
Speaker
and What is it in somebody in that mom's or that person's spirit that is needing or heart is needing it to go a certain direction? Is there a control piece?
00:09:11
Speaker
Is there a trying to check the box piece? is So that's where I would go with that is I'd be looking at what is it that is in my what is the need that I'm trying to fill in this?
00:09:21
Speaker
yeah Is there something that i I am missing in my life? Is there something that maybe from my childhood I didn't have those pieces in our dinner? Our dinner was a little bit more business-like.
00:09:34
Speaker
My mom and dad talked about the day-to-day, like, okay, tomorrow I need you to pick up so-and-so from soccer. Tomorrow we have this play we need to make at 3.30. Or was, and I really wanted connection and I missed that.
00:09:44
Speaker
So now I'm like trying to force connection, but I want it to look like the connection that I have in mind. Whereas connection sounds like it's taking place and it's all in its own organic form. And maybe that doesn't match exactly what you're visualizing in your place.
00:09:59
Speaker
Yes. Yeah. It's like, and that's the thing. I, I, it's like, I catch myself, you know? So it's like, I know that it's happening because I can feel the feeling i in my body of like wanting to manage it.
00:10:09
Speaker
And it's funny because this is the only place it shows up in my day with my kids. It's just like the dinner table. So it sounds like I do need to continue to do

Managing Parental Stress and Self-care

00:10:18
Speaker
some work on that. And, and, and sometimes I have been noticing like checking those logistics boxes, like, okay, did-taday what's, what's the game plan for this week or tomorrow?
00:10:27
Speaker
when really I don't want to have that conversation right now. I just want to like be together and, you know, just have a moment. And so then it's like, i I, and so that's when I just like, take that breath. I sit back. I just allow it to happen. So yes, yes. So that's, that's where it's, I guess I've still got some work to do. And so how, how else can you, um,
00:10:49
Speaker
kind of explain or share to moms who maybe don't have it in the dinner timetable? Like where else do you see it showing up? Sure. So one example would be a real example for us in our house recently was um we were all getting over colds. And so my tolerance level and my my capacities bucket was not as open to the demands in our house. So my capacity, I love to think of our capacities bucket we each have as a parent and how much we can pour our demands into our bucket.
00:11:22
Speaker
So when we're sick, our capacities bucket is going to be much fuller. When we're caregiving and our kids have been sick, our capacities bucket is going to be very full. It's not going to have as much room, right?
00:11:33
Speaker
So when my and then our think of your kids also have the same thing. So especially with highly sensitive kids or neurodiverse kids, Their capacities bucket can fill up very quickly without you even understanding why it's full.
00:11:46
Speaker
So checking in with those kiddos to see, especially when we're sick. um So an example I love to share is I was recently going to brush my daughter's teeth and she was like, oh, I'm in the middle of something, mom, I don't want to do it right now. And she was doing something i was like, oh, mom has told you I gave you a five-minute warning, a two-minute warning, one minute, like it's, we need to go.
00:12:07
Speaker
And I'm starting to get frustrated because sometimes It's going to push us back in time. She's not going to get as much sleep. She's going to get grumpy because she's getting over a cold. All of these things, right? These fear things that are coming up in my mind. It's like, okay, we need to go.
00:12:20
Speaker
So then I'm getting more frustrated. She's feeling that frustration. She's the mirror of my my feelings and my energy, my emotions I'm putting out. she starts to get frustrated back at me.
00:12:32
Speaker
My husband, who has been at work and hasn't been with the sick kids all day, comes in and he's in a grounded, calm version, right? He's not feeling those frustrations. He's just been washing dishes or something. He comes in.
00:12:45
Speaker
he He can sit with her and connect with her and he's like, okay, mom, go ahead and take over the dishes if you want. Like, let me, I got this. And he he's coming in from a grounded place. She's reflecting his loving connection.
00:12:58
Speaker
So she calms down very quickly and I can go calm down while I'm washing the dishes and meditate. or you know meditate I love to do active meditation. So I'm washing the dishes. I'm thinking about the foam as I'm washing the dishes.
00:13:11
Speaker
i um I have my earbuds in so I can't hear the conversation and I can just maybe listen to some calming music. I'm grounding myself. I'm reconnecting and I'm calming my system down because maybe eventually my husband's in a good place right now, but he's getting over his cold too. Maybe we're going to have to switch back.
00:13:28
Speaker
That's something to think about is Where are we in our and our capacities and demands journey? Because they're reflecting back exactly as we are, and they have their capacities bucket too.
00:13:40
Speaker
I wanted to reflect back on your example with the table. I was thinking if you're still feeling that energy bubbling up in your heart, that's something that you could reflect on during meditation, journal for yourself, all of these pieces.
00:13:53
Speaker
as I don't think I got to I don't know if I laid the groundwork as much for that, but um Yes. And with my example, if I'm feeling every night I'm feeling frustrated because she's not going to brush her teeth, then I look back at that control.
00:14:06
Speaker
What happened in my childhood where I needed to control something? Was there something specifically with teeth brushing? Was there something specifically with me not being heard? My child's not hearing me. She's not listening.
00:14:19
Speaker
Do I have something from my childhood where I wasn't heard, where I um was ignored? Maybe that's coming up in this fear-based or coming up in this explosion feeling that I'm having. Yes.
00:14:30
Speaker
yeah topics like and like I love it because you're already bridging into like my next question. So it's it's fantastic. Yeah. So tell us more about the tools that you use. Like I love mindfulness-based tools, meditation, like tell us about how you use them.
00:14:44
Speaker
Hmm. Yeah, so, you know, don't know. I've heard self-care is a hot topic in social media, and I'm not really sure why it's a hot topic. don't um But self-care is something that I feel like is so important, especially if you have highly sensitive kids, neurodiverse kids.
00:15:02
Speaker
gifted and talented kids. I think I've heard gifted and distracted as a description lately for some of these really smart kiddos. But yeah, I mean, it can be even more draining for us. So self-care is something that has been such a big one. um And my husband and I, we when we first had kids, we would always think the whole family has to be together every single weekend, the whole weekend.
00:15:25
Speaker
We have to be together connecting and sharing. no, no, no. Mom needs a moment to recharge. Dad needs a moment or whoever the partner is needs a moment to recharge. So my husband and i a long time ago, we started doing swap times where we would each have one to two hours on the weekend. And then the other person would have the kiddos where we could do something that we were actively present and conscious in. So For example, if you go for a run and you're thinking about, oh, I have this to get done, I have that to get done, I got to do that. You're going through your list of things you need to do that day.
00:16:01
Speaker
That doesn't count as your self-care. Your self-care needs to be something that you are consciously engaged in. You need to be recharging yourself. You need to be um releasing some of those demands in your capacity bucket. You need to be connecting with yourself.
00:16:18
Speaker
And So there's a lot of things that I love to do. I think guided meditations or meditations are great. I studied Reiki. That was really powerful for me. So um that was a healing journey that I went through as a parent and a human.
00:16:33
Speaker
And and Qigong is something that I love to mention. It's like um active meditation is kind of how it with a little bit of energy work. um I do a group version of that. And so finding those things that you can do to recharge yourself as a mom is so important. And then also helping your partner to do that as well.
00:16:53
Speaker
Oh, wow. I love that. And I, um, my wish is that the dads out there would embrace that for the moms. Um, because I think a lot of times, you know, not to get into the roles in the conversation right now, but like a lot of times they don't.
00:17:08
Speaker
Don't think of that. They think, well, this is the moment so to do all these things. um The one thing that stood out for me and what you're saying is, so I just finished a course called Consciously Digital.
00:17:19
Speaker
And so I'm now a consciously digital certified coach. And that just adds on to all the stuff that I already have. But I wanted to start incorporating that in because the technology use is such a big issue with my clients and um such a hot topic in the schools. And so the thing I learned in there, and I already had a background in neuroscience, but I loved what I learned in there, which is about the part of the brain that's called the default mode network.
00:17:43
Speaker
And that is just like that rest and relax. It's kind of like in the parasympathetic state, you know, when we're calm and relaxed. But that's essential that most of us aren't getting enough of these days. And so that is what allows our brain to do what's called slow thinking.
00:18:00
Speaker
And that's where our brains can be creative. We can do long-term goal setting. We can really like create visions in our head. we It's just a state of relaxation where you allow your brain to just literally kind of go into default mode. Like if you have nothing to do and no phone and and no chores and you're just sitting there. And ah and so that's, I think, that kind of first stage of meditation where it's just starting to like slow those brain waves down.
00:18:24
Speaker
And it's just like bringing that to people's awareness because so many moms I know are so stressed out And they're not allowing themselves those breaks. And even, you know, all the moms I know, which are moms of teenagers, a just as much, right? There's just as much running around and activity going on.
00:18:43
Speaker
And so like just forcing yourself to do these breaks so that you can activate your slow thinking. And it's amazing how um it doesn't really even take that long. You know, ideally you give yourself a longer time. They say the more stressed out you are, the more time you need to relax.
00:18:56
Speaker
Yeah. <unk> So, yeah, I just love hearing about that because I think that's something that we're overlooking a lot of. And so many people use their phones to relax. They just like plop on the couch and start scrolling on social media.
00:19:10
Speaker
And they think that that's chill time when honestly, it's actually neurologically not. It doesn't count. And so just to remove that from people's like definition of self-care or relaxation, because that's not part of the equation.
00:19:24
Speaker
Yeah, I did not mention anything on devices. I feel like, um you know, it's really interesting. I did some studies or I was reading some studies for speech therapy and working on that. And it said the maximum amount of time that kids, this was younger kids, should be on any type of technology is 45 minutes.
00:19:43
Speaker
A day. Yeah. And if you think about it, like if they're on technology at school, taking standardized testing on a computer, my kids are definitely going to be outside when they get home. We're not going to be on a device at that time. But yes, that that dopamine hits and all of those pieces, if you're scrolling, that's not going to be re-energizing for you at all. Yeah, yeah, exactly.

Parental Influence on Children and Identity Work

00:20:07
Speaker
So let's kind of like round out the conversation with like how this, our energy as parents does reflect back to our kids. You mentioned that earlier with like this, your speech therapy patients and and how that was um happening. But I too see that a lot in like parents with teenagers where,
00:20:27
Speaker
that You know, it's like the moms that are coming to me saying, oh, my gosh, my daughter talks back to me and she's so disrespectful or my kids this and my kids that. And you can just tell their energy.
00:20:39
Speaker
already know what's happening. Like literally within seconds, you can tell because the energy they bring to talk about it. I can tell that's the energy they're using on their teenager. And so therefore their teenager is like, literally, it's like the, um you know, the mere opposite where it's like that. It's the polarization, but it's pushing back in the equal force, whatever Newton's laws, you know, ah um but it's going, it's not going this way. It's going, you know, the energy is going this way.
00:21:03
Speaker
And so talk to us about that, like, like your experience of that. Yeah, yeah. You know, it's interesting. I feel like when we're talking about meditation, that's such a powerful piece to be thinking about because when we're meditating, i love to go into a meditation with with an idea of what I want to work on in that meditation, an intention of why do I feel like I have to control this right now? Why do I feel like I want to erupt when they push back?
00:21:33
Speaker
It's really interesting because I feel like the toothbrushing scenario is so similar to what you're describing with the teenagers talking back. Because my seven-year-old will talk back with, I don't want to do it right now. I'm doing this, right?
00:21:47
Speaker
When I need you to So it's it's a really similar situation. And then there's that tuning in of what if I what if i gave them options? what if i What if I gave them options within what I what i can handle as a parent?
00:22:02
Speaker
What if I let them have a little bit more control, right? Because why do I have to be in control? Why do I have what in me says that I know exactly what is always better for my teenager than them themselves?
00:22:16
Speaker
Mm-hmm. A hundred percent. That's it. You nailed it on the head. Yeah. Yeah. Right. Yeah. So, you know, it goes back to the inner child piece again. What is it that I didn't get to control as a kid? Maybe as a teenager, I didn't get to control it. I had to be in the box of what my parents wanted me to be, good grades, going to but um the exact academics.
00:22:40
Speaker
the exact extracurriculars, the pressures of trying to get into the perfect college because I had to have the perfect profession, all of these things that we're trying to now force on them that were forced on us.
00:22:52
Speaker
Why are we repeating the cycle when we can change it? why Why go through that again? So our juniors are going to go through that. It's like it's just going to keep going unless we stop it and say, what in me is lacking? What in me needs to be worked on?
00:23:06
Speaker
these challenges are opportunities for healing, growing, and learning. And our kids are going to be our biggest teachers in it. And it's going to get louder until we work on it.
00:23:18
Speaker
Oh, I love that. Yes. Yes. I completely agree. and and and And I want to add one more question. on to thing onto that, which is, um you know, a lot of what I do is kind of like identity work as moms. And it sounds like we just have this great, you know, synergy here. And so it's like, what is it about me as as a mom that this needs to happen, but not from the control piece, but more the idea of like self-worth, like,
00:23:44
Speaker
I'm a good mom if my kid does A, B, and C, right? And so they put these conditions on it, like what it means. And and part of it is their own opinion of themselves, but then also worrying about other people's opinions, whether it's their spouse or their in-laws or friends. Like I want to appear, like I have it all together and I'm amazing mom.
00:24:03
Speaker
So therefore, my child needs to get this a SAT t score, be on this team and get admitted into this college so that I can feel proud and brag about my child. When really, it's not actually about like, yes, is there good intention in built in there? Yes.
00:24:19
Speaker
Right. But it's really more so that I can feel good about who I am as a mom instead of like what might really actually be best for my child. I have such a good example of that. So, you know, when we're looking at're when we're looking at trying to help ourselves with some of these moments of eruption or or conflict in our houses, let's look for the patterns. Let's look for when do we see it happening? And then we need to try to find the root. So an example, and I have a younger kiddo example because that's where I'm at right now, but I feel like it relates to so what you're talking about.
00:24:51
Speaker
um My son would always, because I'm in Colorado, my son would always want to want to be wearing shorts in 35 degree weather. And so it was this battle before school of put on the pants. No, I'm wearing the shorts, put on the pants. And we would have this battle.
00:25:04
Speaker
So was like, just let him wear the shorts and put the pants in the backpack. But then I had to realize, what is the reason that you can't let him do it? It isn't because I'm worried about him getting cold. It's because when I walk him to the door, he was younger at the time, when I would walk him to the door, other parents would always say, wow, he's really tough to be out here in shorts and 35 degree weather.
00:25:27
Speaker
look at him. He's always in shorts. Look at this guy. And all these comments that would come. And it didn't just end there because I would take those comments home with me. They would go in my backpack, my invisible backpack, and I'd be hearing them as I walked home.
00:25:41
Speaker
And then you start to add on to that conversation yourself, right? yeah The little... our little head inside of us, you're a bad mom. How did you let your kid go to school not wearing shorts? Ooh, am I going to get in trouble for this?
00:25:54
Speaker
What is the coldest temperature you could wear shorts in? Am I going to get in actual trouble? It's like all of these pieces that fill in, right? When we need to look at Why am I not okay with somebody saying that to me?
00:26:06
Speaker
Why do I care what other people are saying? We've been conditioned to think that them them approving of our parenting choices is what matters.
00:26:18
Speaker
Why does it matter? Each kid is different. And yes, my kid runs very hot. Yeah. Red cheeks in the summer. Like, mama, he needs sunscreen. He has sunscreen on. He's hot. Yes.
00:26:29
Speaker
Yes. Classic story with, you know, because that's such a common universal thing with kids wanting to wear the shorts. And yeah, even adults do that because I lived in Boston for nine years. And even the men who worked in my company would come and burn shorts. All the men.
00:26:44
Speaker
are they doing? They're just trying to be these tough guys. Yes. But maybe they just, that's what's comfortable to them, right? let's let them be whatever they want to be. Let's let them wear mismatched clothing. when I mean, we do it with our preschoolers. We let them go to school wearing the fluffy dress with the crazy rain boots and whatnot. But then when they're older, it's like this, ooh, I have to mold them into what society believes that they have to be wearing.
00:27:10
Speaker
Why? Why can't we let the 10-year-old go, um Another example, my my son used to be like, I'm good at everything. And just, I'm really good at basketball.
00:27:21
Speaker
And that wasn't maybe his forte. I'm really good at soccer. I'm the smartest kid. And he was all of this. My husband would say, do we tell him? Like, he's not the best at ever. But hon, I'm worried he's getting real. Or he would say to me, like, I'm worried he's getting really big headed. And I was like, you know, I like this confidence and this empowerment because when he goes out into the world, it's going to tell him, you know, give him the restrictions and the boundaries

Conclusion and Podcast Information

00:27:46
Speaker
of where his actual physical abilities are. So let's continue to empower this and foster this as long as we can right now.
00:27:53
Speaker
Yeah. I love it. I love it. In fact, I think like that's the perfect, um, kind of feels like happy ending to our conversation. So how can people find you going forward and tell us the name of your podcast again so people can listen. Yeah.
00:28:06
Speaker
Yeah. So we're heart to heart parents is the podcast on Apple, Spotify, YouTube, and then you can find us on um Facebook and Instagram with the same username. And then heart to heart life.com is our website, which has all the links for everything. Thanks so much for having me. It lovely.
00:28:22
Speaker
like Thank you. Yes. I enjoyed our conversation. It was fantastic.