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Nonsensical Nonsense: People are dumb
13 Plays1 day ago
Y'all already know what's up its Saturday night we gonna act a damn fool
FOLLOW US EVERYWHERE bio.link/nonsensicalnetwork
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Transcript
00:01:52
Speaker
Yes. Yes.
Return of the Hosts
00:02:53
Speaker
Welcome to the F-
00:03:19
Speaker
ah y'all better look the fuck out today. My crayons are sharp, the box is full, my bottle of glue is topped off, and my helmet's on tight, baby. We're about to risen with the tism. Let's get with it. Suck my dick and eat my asshole, you sons of bitches.
00:03:39
Speaker
Yeah, that can only mean one thing. Bitches, it's Saturday night. What's going on, everybody? Hopefully you guys had a good week. Man, I haven't been on a Saturday night show in a buck, like two weeks, three weeks, something like
Nonsensical Network Promo
00:03:53
Speaker
that.
00:03:53
Speaker
But nonetheless, if you're not already, go ahead and check us out. Facebook, Instagram, X, and TikTok. Shows are live all the fucking time on our YouTube, Facebook, and Twitch channels.
00:04:06
Speaker
You guys can always check us out there. And you can listen anytime, anyplace, wherever you listen to podcasts. Simply go to bio.link slash nonsensicalnetwork or hit your old Google box and type in nonsensicalnetwork and you're going to find it.
00:04:19
Speaker
I guarantee it's going like the first thing that pops up. Where that fucking popping. I'm just saying at the end of the day.
Saturday Night Recap
00:04:25
Speaker
So, anywho, yes, it has been a long time, guys. I hope you've enjoyed the last couple of Saturday nights.
00:04:31
Speaker
My camera's being crazy right now. We're going see if we can get it fixed. Rocky came in and did his thing. And then last Saturday, the training wheels got kicked off.
00:04:44
Speaker
And this young lady right here was left in the driver's seat. Oh, wait, what? Shit, I didn't even know you brought me up. Fuck.
00:04:55
Speaker
Yeah, I know. I caught you. You weren't paying attention. So I brought you up. What's going on, Wally? What's going on, Chatterbox? I see you down there. What up, man? see Hey, Nancy. Hey, Wally.
00:05:06
Speaker
What the? Woo-woo. Yeah. What's up, guys? Yeah, you got to you got the doors kicked off. Macy's in there, your little niece. I was going to pitch you wearing pitch yellow and blue because are we
Football Banter
00:05:19
Speaker
win us, baby.
00:05:20
Speaker
All we do is win, win. win yeah Didn't y'all lose last week? Yeah, we did. We fucking lost. Aren't you guys basically as bad as the Browns this year? but Yeah, but the Eagles won, though. Yeah.
00:05:36
Speaker
So, hey. Oh, my God. Mow Dog in the house. Let's go. Stores in the house. Stores in the house. Let's go. What she said. What up, Mow Dog? How's it going?
00:05:49
Speaker
Yeah, man. i've've i've I've honestly missed the last couple Saturday nights not being here, but
Life Updates and Experiences
00:05:55
Speaker
you guys held that. Rocky held down the fort when we were at Michael's wedding. um Then last weekend, I had some things come up, and I decided I was going to take a night off and and go enjoy the finer things in life.
00:06:09
Speaker
hey That's what that's what do you want to fucking call it. But no, I got to see a little bit of the show last week.
00:06:20
Speaker
Britt, I think you did an awesome job for just kind of getting the training wheels kicked off and just being kind of put on the spot. I came up with it. I was like, let's do the damn thing.
00:06:34
Speaker
but Let's do the damn thing. What up, Jersey? How you doing, girl?
Humor and Language
00:06:41
Speaker
Macy, calm down. Hashtag Glacush. It feels good. Slut and whore is put together. That's what I mean, Macy. You're 12. There's your number one fan, Robert robert Platinum. oh but Finally, I get acknowledged. What am I, chopped liver over here, Robert?
00:07:03
Speaker
ah Hey, how's it going, Robert? What's up? How's it going?
00:07:12
Speaker
Joycee? Let's go. We got the main people up in here. Love it. With gravy. yeah He showed me some f freaking food earlier. oh my God. It was... No, that was not him.
00:07:32
Speaker
you Do you to start? starting like People send me videos of them cooking food and stuff like that.
00:07:44
Speaker
and It looks so good. and i make that's because so hungry. so but That's because you're you're deep down inside you're a fat person stuck in a little person's body. You got body dysmorphia.
00:07:56
Speaker
You want to be fat. you got you got body mismorphia you want to be Yeah, I do. It's not fair, man. Yeah, what Wally said. About time a real host came back to Saturday night.
00:08:10
Speaker
Hey, let's go. Can we see it start the... Wait, what? I don't know what you're talking about. what? Nacey, I don't know what you're talking about.
00:08:21
Speaker
That's Samodan. What up, Megan? Oh. yeah oh I saw Aunt
Social Events and Drinking Stories
00:08:29
Speaker
Brittany, so... See what?
00:08:32
Speaker
Hey.
00:08:36
Speaker
I don't bring anything. We see We're going to let her figure this out. well ah Watch, watch. She's going to figure this math problem out. We're just going to sit in there and watch. I got it, but I feel bad because Lazy Jedi isn't here. And it's like,
00:08:58
Speaker
There we go. Dude, you suck at it. You suck at it so bad. At Michael's wedding, you were like... I was still nursing a broken head and a broken rib. Dude, that's my fucking shoulder. What are you talking about?
00:09:18
Speaker
Oh my god, that was like six months ago. kiddding Yeah, and it it fucking hurts. It still fucking hurts. And then having fun, Christopher heard it ah so yeah I didn't do anything.
00:09:33
Speaker
back from sydney and she Megan, you got it. Dang, go, Megan. You're traveling all over the place. That's crazy. Let's go.
00:09:43
Speaker
Get it, girl. yeah Tell them, Jersey. We talking bad about people yet. We're going to need your little niece to come down ah yeah mae calm down.
00:09:59
Speaker
Yeah, you see that, MoDog? You see that? Y'all want to treat me like chopped liver. I take a couple weeks off. and oh who Click who, hashtag click who. Now look how she treats you people.
00:10:10
Speaker
Look how she treats you people. that's
00:10:15
Speaker
but anyway Now she's going to try to figure that bad problem out, Rob. Is that a real thing? back to you're going You're going to see Back to the Future the musical like seven times and traveling all over God's green earth to do it?
00:10:33
Speaker
That's wild. That's crazy. So my brother and his ex-girlfriend, or no, me, my brother's ex-girlfriend and i rented out a whole movie theater to get um Back to the Future 2 tickets for no reason, but you know.
00:10:55
Speaker
I mean, for the birthday, I guess. You rented out an entire movie theater for three goddamn people? No, no, no. It was like maybe like 10 or 12 of us. i mean, it would have been a lot cheaper just to buy 10 or 12 tickets and go see the movie.
00:11:09
Speaker
But we had the... Yeah, they're probably... There probably wasn't that many people in there for Back to the Future 2. I shouldn't show you one of you. You just had to buy your tickets in advance at the end of the day.
00:11:23
Speaker
Because you can do that now at the movie theater. You can buy your tickets online and pick your seats. That's crazy to me. But no, we wanted to have it all to ourselves. ah For my brother's birthday.
00:11:37
Speaker
but For Back to the Future
Movie Theater Antics
00:11:39
Speaker
2? I know, I know, I know. it was still saying it was cool i mean back to the future 2 is great but if i'm going to spend that kind of money it's going to be from the original first one i know i get it i totally get that yeah whatever have seen each movie that's ah very specific number mehan she like
00:12:06
Speaker
do you have a tally board and every time you watch the movie what up chris technician how you doing balker chris technician in the house let's go you should ask somebody to buy her a taco this is the real camera look robert platinum she's down there trying to figure it out she's on the laptop typing in that that math equation yeah my niece's got me in she's got my back man
00:12:34
Speaker
I don't think I spelled that right, but I'll get to the point. I'm actually hashtag I'm adding
00:12:43
Speaker
a guy.
00:12:46
Speaker
but so ri sun i don't think i spellun that right but oh get to find imagine ta maning
00:13:00
Speaker
hey here yeah Wow, you actually have a tally board. I have a tally board, too, from where I did 100 shots in 100 minutes and smoked Michael and watched him puke all over the place.
00:13:11
Speaker
Oh, God, why, why, why talk about puke? Why? You're not a fan of the puke?
00:13:20
Speaker
you're not a fan of you know you're not a fan of the puke I can't. Like, I'll hold my homegirl's hair back, but, like, I have to hold my ears and, like, not breathe. How do you do
Unexpected Humor in Live Shows
00:13:34
Speaker
that if you're holding a hair? How you do that? I'm like, it's, like, it's a task. It's a fucking task.
00:13:40
Speaker
Just stick her head in the toilet and be done with it. Dude. Okay, so, like, when Michael did the fucking pickle shot shit, that, um dropp to it like,
00:13:54
Speaker
That almost got to me. Like when he was drinking the pickle shots. That's disgusting. Yes. My friend, she turned 21 and we went to Pickles Pub and she threw up fucking pickles, alcohol and shit. And I was like, oh, I hold one of my ears with my little shoulder and one with my hand and then her hair with my other hand.
00:14:20
Speaker
I think you got i think i mean that's that's that that's a hell of a friend right there. but But if you've got that many problems and that many difficulties, I'm just going like, yo, you're on your own. I'm not coming in there. I can't do the puke.
00:14:31
Speaker
I can't hear the noise. I can't smell it. I can't see it. You're good. So when Michael brought that up at the fucking wedding, i was like, dude, I can't do it. I can't.
00:14:47
Speaker
I don't even want to know what my IQ is. I'm probably borderline genius, let's be honest. but Okay. What's going on, Angel?
00:14:58
Speaker
think you can talk about that because that's fucking hilarious. I mean, you never know. I could be. I could be, all honesty, a fucking genius.
00:15:10
Speaker
We all know that i'm I'm going to be a cult leader one day. I'm working on it right now. I'm gathering my following by doing this podcast. You think I want a podcast? No, this is how I gather my my followers, my minions. mean yeah I already have a gremlin. Shut up.
00:15:32
Speaker
What's the dinner report? like I just did a frozen pizza tonight. It's just Cash and I at home. We went and got Raisin Cane's for a late lunch. and I was like, dude, just get a frozen pizza for later. He's like, yeah, I'm good with that.
00:15:43
Speaker
so Frozen pizza action. ah We ate some stuff.
00:15:52
Speaker
Things and stuff. You are below lines. Probably. I know we had fucking turkey sandwich with chips and stuff and some pesto pasta shit.
00:16:11
Speaker
Whatever, dude. I'm doing great. I don't think that was the question. The question was, what did you have for dinner? Not are you doing okay? How are you doing over there? Oh, that's not good. so Again, I wasn't asking.
00:16:31
Speaker
a um Yeah, no, I didn't really have like a dinner dinner tonight for sickness or not.
Healthy Eating Amidst Chaos
00:16:39
Speaker
so She just got high and went in the kitchen and sat inside the refrigerator and just started eating shit. We have fruit and stuff like that.
00:16:48
Speaker
had strawberries. and I've been trying to eat healthier. You have that? Yeah, let's go. i thought you were a Seahawks fan or something.
00:17:03
Speaker
I like Coke 45, like the malt liquor, but it's already taken. but yeah No, damn, I see what saying. Oh, man. Yeah, but if it's spelled differently, I might be able to roll with it. What you talking about?
00:17:17
Speaker
Cult. Yeah. Don't worry about it. Yeah. not but like If your cult comes with free beer, hey, I got you, bud. I got you. I got you.
00:17:31
Speaker
oh Free beer. Any day that ends in Y. Yeah, Robert Platinum knows what's up. Let's go. Wow, this is the girl coming out of me. It would be a mimosa instead of a beer for for striking. You don't strike me as the mimosa type.
00:17:52
Speaker
it Like like orange crushes. I'm from Maryland. The fucking job. Like that sort of shit. Orange crush.
00:18:01
Speaker
Orange crush the drink. Yeah. Yeah. Like that's that's basic. No, you're hot. The pop. You're a fucking idiot. I hate you so fucking much. It's just pop first and foremost.
00:18:16
Speaker
No, you fucking northern ass bitch. Midwest, but its so know call I I'll call it soda pop. That's as far as I'll fucking take it. Soda!
00:18:29
Speaker
No, I'm talking about Tito's and orange juice. So it's vodka and orange juice. It's basically like what And orange crushes.
00:18:40
Speaker
Okay, so vodka, that's... Okay, I thought a mimosa was orange juice and champagne. That's what mimosas is, yeah. That's like... Okay, I can see the orange pop in vodka. I can see you drinking that, but I don't see it as a mimosa type.
00:18:55
Speaker
Or orange pop in fucking tequila and going out in the yard and fighting raccoons. Dude, when i was at the... When I got left there at the bar...
00:19:07
Speaker
They gave me, I asked for
00:19:12
Speaker
juice and vodka, and they gave me fucking but or fucking tequila instead of vodka, and I couldn't fucking drink it. was like, nope. Tequila, I can't do it, dude.
00:19:26
Speaker
She started drinking that tequila. Next thing you know, she was out in the alley. It's Britney, bitch. It's Britney, bitch.
00:19:36
Speaker
It's Britney. fighting raccoons, stabbing homeless people. but You know what? That's me, man. I promise you, Robert, I will not poison the beer. i guarantee you there will be no poisoning of the beer.
00:19:53
Speaker
yeah you happen to drink too much of the beer and die, and that's really not my fault. That just means more beer for the rest of the cult. name That's on you, dude.
00:20:05
Speaker
Ha, ha, ha. ah We got the last time I joined to kill I was 2019 coming away from the.
00:20:17
Speaker
The lab and life tour was always bands that I watched and shit. oh yeah And I just got lot of it too sick, so I can't do it anymore. Last time I last time i drank tequila, I was like 16.
00:20:32
Speaker
Surprisingly enough, it was the same time that it was the first and last time that I smoked weed when I was 16. not on the night Not on the same night. It was two different nights. But I was like, yeah, weed's really not for me. And then I was like, hey, let's try tequila for the first time and let's polish off a bottle. That'll be a great idea.
00:20:49
Speaker
And ever since then, I'm like, no, I'll have the occasional margarita or whatever. margaritas. I can't drink tequila. i won't i won't do it. I don't want to get drunk off of it ever again. I did my and did my dance with that devil known as tequila.
00:21:03
Speaker
Yeah. Right. Hey, MoDog, I'm with you. Both of our teams are killing it in
Football Rivalries
00:21:08
Speaker
college. Hashtag fuck my Browns. Hashtag fuck your Bengals. This is why I fucking wore this tonight because I knew we were going to end up fucking talking about football.
00:21:17
Speaker
Look, it's one comment. It's one comment. And your team's not any better. They're just as dog shit. Shut up. 49ers one day. Yeah, so far. We have 49ers. Birds are 4-0. Nobody asked Jersey. Okay.
00:21:27
Speaker
forty niners one yeah there yeah so far we have forty nineerss birds are four no nobody asked jersey for me a nines they can possibly the books tomorrow yeah the browns are playing the vikings in london tomorrow so i gotta get my ass up at like nine o'clock to watch the game
00:21:51
Speaker
white eyes Wow, you're going to disrespect Robert Platinum like that? The guy's trying to talk about how he got served by Ties and you're like, nobody fucking cares, bro. Nobody fucking cares, bro. Fuck your feelings. Fuck your drinks. Fuck going to Hawaii, bro.
00:22:06
Speaker
Nobody fucking cares. That was to you. That was to you. but that was to me. That was to me. Sure it was. Sure it was.
00:22:19
Speaker
What's the belts, Macy? Those are those are just custom-made nonsensical nonsense belts that I had made because I'm the champ. Because I'm the greatest podcaster of all time. Casey, chill. I mean, Macy, fuck.
00:22:30
Speaker
so Casey's my little sister. Macy's my niece. Fuck. Macy, chill. Wait, what? what yeah I know. It's confusing. Poison. Poison free? It really doesn't matter to me. Beers. I'm trying to get caught up.
00:22:46
Speaker
what i try to get caught up
00:22:52
Speaker
but Fucking shitbirds. Fucking Baltimore shitbirds. And the Eagles. I am indecisive. But the Eagles won, man. They won. They fucking won.
00:23:03
Speaker
Let's go. Ravens lost. The Philadelphia shitbirds or the Baltimore shitbirds. Guess what? No one fucking cares! but But no, it's it's Baltimore usually, really. I can't wait. i can' cause that's where i'm I can't wait until the day I go to Baltimore and piss on Art Modell's grave.
00:23:21
Speaker
I will fuck you up. You know what I'm a sign of fucking trash. No, yeah I can't fit you in a trash bag. So, or a trash bag. I have to get a fucking, what is it?
00:23:36
Speaker
The dumpster. I have to fucking put you in a dumpster. I'm going to get a trash bag and put you in it and hang it up in a tree and tell kids that you're a piรฑata and let them beat you with sticks.
00:23:47
Speaker
ah Come on, kids. Gather around. Hit the piรฑata. It'll be fun. Jesus Christ. it'll go fun
00:23:56
Speaker
those bra Yeah, you said you were going to do that at the wedding, but you were stuck on your phone. I was watching foosball. I sent that picture to Michael and he's like, what an idiot. What an idiot.
00:24:10
Speaker
one idiot
00:24:14
Speaker
I mean, I mean, I was losing all the way around. I showed up. Apparently, I was late, even though I was there three hours early or two hours early. no i don't know. I was i was late.
00:24:26
Speaker
I didn't dress up. I don't know. i was i was fighting to lose in battle that day. So was like, fuck it. I'm going to watch football. I'm not even drinking. I got to stay sober. i got to upload that picture of you just sitting on your phone. I'm like, oh, nice.
00:24:44
Speaker
Oh, aren't
00:24:51
Speaker
ain't you two just so precious in the chat? Thanks, babe.
00:25:05
Speaker
Anytime I live. To the fucking room, y'all. ah yeah ru oh they need they a couple they need ah they They need a They need a couple's name.
00:25:19
Speaker
like yeah yeah like ah You what I'm talking about? Why can't I think of any names? Like ah but yeah lu like Jennifer Lopez and Ben Affleck had a couple names.
00:25:33
Speaker
Or Brad Pitt and Jennifer Aniston. That's what was trying to come up with the other day. Well,
Fictional Cult Jokes
00:25:38
Speaker
her name is... I don't want to uh mosey atmosphere mosy mosey
00:25:53
Speaker
sarge sarge mosley
00:26:00
Speaker
what dumpster di murder dog watch your mouth but Don't trust her. My niece is in here, man. She's 12. How's the maggots, Michael?
00:26:15
Speaker
Amazing. Sergeant Jersey Dog. That's funny. That's their name. Jersey Dog.
00:26:29
Speaker
Sergeant Jersey Dog. Well, Britton, it's Saturday, Yeah, we gotta let people in here, unfortunately. Let's let them in. I'm already tired. of I'm already bored with you.
00:26:42
Speaker
don't gotta fuck. Let's let them in. bore me. You bore me. bo me dan did You dude. Did you lay down the ground rules for a certain chatterbox? Okay, so ah we have to be years or older yeah to come up but take them up on the board Oh, sorry. You cannot come up in here, darling.
00:27:08
Speaker
um Other than that, it's just talking bullshit. Let's go. The link is dropped. Pew, pew, pew, pew. Beam, beam, beam, beam. Wow, wow. guys know the drill. The link is dropped. If you want to come hang out and get on panel with us, you are welcome to.
00:27:26
Speaker
Let's go. We got Megan. Megan is the, are not Megan. As always, a person to my, that joined the show with me, Brittany, Jesus, I couldn't remember your name.
00:27:41
Speaker
You are in charge of the of the back door access. Okay. I'm going to entertain this. will entertain this for a second,
00:27:57
Speaker
but you know what i'm goingnna do if chickens bad
00:28:01
Speaker
You have the power. What's up, Megan? What's up, aviators? What did you say, guys? ah She starts out hot.
00:28:15
Speaker
How are you doing, Angel? I'm great. How y'all doing? Don't encourage the so I'm sorry, Bray. I heard the 18-year-older and I jumped on the fucking thing. so I don't know what else you said after the verse. I don't know.
00:28:31
Speaker
she She is allowed. She's 12. She's just not allowed to cut one hair. So I'll keep i'll keep it decent. Don't worry about it. She fucking knows what's up.
00:28:42
Speaker
I hope she knows what's up, but so now he sees that well i'm not um just saying and I raised her mainly. like since you like don't listen like well, sorry. That explains a lot. went wrong are you Came out of the womb. I held her in my fucking hands.
00:29:09
Speaker
And I beat the shit out of her fucking mom. I beat the shit out of her fucking whore-ass fucking mom, too. what you're saying is that you kidnapped the baby from the hospital.
00:29:24
Speaker
no No. That's how I read it. like That's how I understood what she just said. You're like a baby snatching little gremlin. Kidnap. Rescue.
00:29:35
Speaker
Rescue. Oh, I'm sorry. She said, my real mom. Exactly. didn't mean to say I'm sorry. ah the pain My mistake.
00:29:47
Speaker
but' like goodency up right no and there yes Robert I said too much I said too much I think you might have but uh yeah Brittany just want to ask you for my jersey back when you finished with it please the Ravens jersey I don't know if I'll drop you off I've got three I've got 14 uh Seahawks jerseys and three uh four uh remember this bitch
00:30:21
Speaker
and Clegg really Michigan? Yeah, I know, right? Look, Brittany, come on, be nice. I'm on your side with that one. I'm on your side with that one. Oh, thank you, Macy. It's a disaster area.
00:30:37
Speaker
I'm downsizing. But, yeah, that's all my Seattle stuff there. And this is all my Back to the Future stuff here. My room's pretty cool, too. It's a black background. um No, come on, Brittany. We've got to be nice to Glick. He's allowed one mistake in life, and he's wearing that one mistake.
00:30:56
Speaker
I don't have to be nice to that bitch. Are you to give me? Oh, look, I'm trying to be nice. Wolverine. Wolverine? What? That's my bro. Michigan Wolverines.
00:31:09
Speaker
and USC, right USC Trojans. Sorry, not sorry. Don't give me that look, son.
00:31:20
Speaker
like You know, i'll I'll give you a pass because you're not American and you don't know any better. And you you don't really know how to pick good teams. That's why you like to see chickens and Trojans.
00:31:33
Speaker
Oh, I know perfectly how to choose them. I mean, let's face it, any team's better than Michigan. And who's your college team? I'm sorry, not your your NFL team?
00:31:45
Speaker
Oh, the Browns, their ass. ah The Browns. Time out, loser. You are going to make fun of me for supporting the Central. And you're a Browns fan.
00:31:58
Speaker
All right. i'm going to. um No, I know the Browns suck. I make fun of them more than anybody else do. It's so easy to do, and if you can't make fun of your own team, Glick, what's the point, right? I will tell you that the Seahawks suck if they suck.
00:32:16
Speaker
oh You know, yeah, exactly. Black like my heart, black like my heart. Black heart is beautiful, babe. You're right, Jersey. That's good to see you. My heart is black as night. We got two Ravens fans in here. We got me, Sam, me. Let's go.
00:32:36
Speaker
um I love the Ravens, as I said, Brittany, because I love Edgar Allan Poe and Daniel Falale, who plays for the Ravens. Okay, from Baltimore, yeah. ah Daniel Falale, who plays for the Ravens, is from Melbourne, Australia.
00:32:50
Speaker
Well, was talking about Edgar Allan Poe. Yeah, no, I love Edgar Allan Poe and have since I was about eight or nine, I think.
00:33:02
Speaker
Cool. Awesome. Yeah. Anyways. Definitely. Angel, what the fuck are you doing, dude? Uh, drinking still?
00:33:13
Speaker
What? Why not? what what do now what do you What do
Weekend Plans
00:33:18
Speaker
you have? i want to talk to you. have Dos Equis. those sickies. Because we're gangsters. I went to work at 10 o'clock this morning. Because this will fucking open up at 10. 45 minutes later, she shows up, hands me a fucking strawberry plant.
00:33:31
Speaker
Because we killed the one. Hands me strawberry plant and fucking leaves. I'm like, what about my beer? A cigarette? She's like, go to my sister's. So I went to the fucking metal store. <unk> not Now, I'm on a three-day weekend. It's an elevator day weekend. So I don't go back to work till Tuesday. It's Sunday.
00:33:51
Speaker
Yep. Happy with that.
00:33:55
Speaker
so good Interesting. interesting Interesting. got a three-day weekend next weekend. I'm excited. How are you going to waste the weekend, Blake?
00:34:08
Speaker
What's that? I said, how are you going to waste the three-day weekend? Or use it wisely. you' always see he's always I'm to go on a road trip next Friday.
00:34:19
Speaker
Go see his new girlfriend. um so celebrate i' gonna celebrate and I'm going to celebrate Indigenous People Day on Monday. oh god and she did oh No, I was going to say something sarcastic, but I'm actually not going to say it. I'll save it for later.
00:34:40
Speaker
I'll save the sarcasm for later. No, no, please do. ah not no just I'll just stay quiet for a few minutes and then think about my list ma thinking chicken chicken rib Robert Platinum you're dropping gold in the chat what you rings what yeah chicken his mom took Tylenol so he's autistic and then she funded him out the window when he came out the womb chicken a rice broccoli dinner a fucking Airbnb that he stayed in for nine months
00:35:15
Speaker
another one the hang god the the airbnb you mean the womb with a view glick jersey man i hope there wasn't a view there's a view i do i do yeah do actually i do actually i do can i do that indigenous do it brenny do it you look like i i am uh i'm uh oh oh yeah yeah i did I have no control over that at all. I told you, Saturday night, when you're here, Brittany. You control the... No, I do have... I do. I'm like a quarter... I'm a quarter and just person.
00:35:56
Speaker
What up, lazy Jedi and hizzy? Let's go.
00:36:03
Speaker
That's what I got to do. I got to go in here and pin the... ah i gotta pin the Yeah, what are you doing?
00:36:11
Speaker
Well, you know, smoking meth. ah suppose Please don't. but Smoking meth, throat-punching hookers. That's how I get down here in the big old city of NER.
00:36:23
Speaker
gotten it's It's mandatory. you You gotta smoke meth to throat-punch a hooker. it's It's part of the rules. Jedi! gar would up down ah see see let's go I can get your fucking asshole.
00:36:40
Speaker
ah sir they took sorry Sorry, I don't mean to kill it. I'm doing it. Is Tourette's contagious? Did you give it to our b do our media center? Is that what happened? Our media center now has Tourette's because of you? but but Don't about Tourette's, alright? I got that shit too. Don't talk about that shit. I own it.
00:37:05
Speaker
I fucking own it. We were backstage and she was like, we were backstage as she was like He was like, oh, shit. Cat nipples and dog farts. Square root of seven is 45 and chocolate fudge ice cream. and It's hot outside. I'm like, what the fuck just happened?
00:37:24
Speaker
I baby spider running across my body. Oh, my God. um Get it. Get rid of it. Bye-bye. I was like, what the fuck is happening here?
00:37:36
Speaker
Jedi, you're not going to be the odd thing. Jedi, you're not coming in here until you fucking come in here. You can't come until you come in. You're not coming in here until you come in here, Jedi. Lucky you. I see dumb people.
00:37:51
Speaker
you're not cove in here until you come yeah yes
00:37:59
Speaker
like you
00:38:02
Speaker
but ah snap on but sounds like Dude, Robert, I'm with you. i want to have Tourette so bad. Mordog in Jersey, you know I love you guys on panel, and Daddy's home this week, so you guys are welcome on panel.
00:38:19
Speaker
No, what is wrong?
Military Life Humor
00:38:21
Speaker
No, a trance is not fun. It actually ends up hurting your body when you have tics. It does, because when you have tics and stuff, your muscles and everything tighten up and everything else, and it fucking makes your body sore afterwards.
00:38:33
Speaker
Well, my body my body is sore all the time anyways because I'm old. It's a different sore. Come on, you're fucking huge. You're fucking Sasquatch. Dude, I'm a third of your Wait, I don't have any dressing for that word. I think you can agree. the one The one picture we got of you and I together at Michael's wedding, it was not the greatest picture in the world.
00:38:56
Speaker
No, it wasn't. The size difference between us is insanity. but yeah I did lose a lot of weight, but regardless, I would still be way smaller than you, no matter what. lot that Yeah, you would.
00:39:13
Speaker
She's cute with a teet. I'm so tall. I'm just like skinny and my mom's the same. I just get it from her and I have health issues. so You can get them.
00:39:27
Speaker
But yeah, no. The picture Blick and I together at the wedding, I was like this big to his like. If one of y'all got that, please send it to me.
00:39:40
Speaker
What? I was like this big. man I was like this big. To his. Exactly. I'll try to pull it up on screen. i should have said I had.
00:39:52
Speaker
You know, if i I could have gotten away with a lot in life if I just said I had Tourette's. Why didn't I think of that? sir I'm with you, Robert. I'm with you. Fuck off. So that I could cuss out all my teachers. No consequence.
00:40:04
Speaker
I could blame my Tourette's on everything. Even today in life. I think I'm just going to start telling people i have Tourette's. Why don't you why don't you love chanceor ba right and been different send send it to me and I'll and i'll upload it. no yeah do i could I can send some more of that salty tasting. straight who hey He gets all the salty dressing he he he wants on the Lazy Glicks fan page. Shout out to our followers. Thank you guys for subscribing and supporting our
00:40:40
Speaker
Our adventure. Yeah. yeah Whatever. came crew new We're going to change the name of it to to The Adventures of Squatch and Default.
00:40:56
Speaker
She's tall. righto love her Macy said you're tall. Robert said you're tall and beautiful. Robert's the number one fan. and Robert Black. I'm over here. My dude.
00:41:07
Speaker
That's my dude. Glick looks like a lumberjack. That's exactly how he dressed up at the fucking wedding, too. I was like, what are you wearing? What do you people want from me? I had clean jeans on, I had my good boots on, and I put on pearl step. What do you people want from me?
00:41:22
Speaker
Like, Blaine showed up looking like a 1980s. Clearly, you've only had fucking flusas in your life the last fucking couple of years, and then actual woman. I don't know what that means, but i don't I don't know what that has to do with me dressing up. The wardrobe. The wardrobe.
00:41:38
Speaker
I've dressed like that in my whole life. He was like, this is nice. This is nice. It's clean. It smells clean. I think we're good. These are my nice boots.
00:41:50
Speaker
They were nice boots. but right He didn't look bad. He really didn't. But compared to what you asked for... I don't know what was... i you know what was asked you know what You know what I was told the dress code was?
00:42:04
Speaker
Business fuckable. Fuckable. Business fuckable. Business cash fuckable. Not a bad shirt. I came lumberjack country fuckable. I don't know. but Not to me because you're my bro. But...
00:42:16
Speaker
so Make sure you like, subscribe, and do all the things. Yeah, Jersey, let them know. You get a gold star. let's go. Yeah, 910 Grannies approve. Wait.
00:42:28
Speaker
No, don't you're not even on the panel. What are you talking about, dude? Like, share, and subscribe. Just like Jersey said. You sons of bitches. 910 Grannies. a Our approval rating amongst Grannies is amazing. yeah Somebody else hop up in here. We're waiting for you.
00:42:49
Speaker
My IQ only two digits. His IQ actually one digit, but he considers that negative sign in front of the one. He's a little dumb. Oh my gosh.
00:43:05
Speaker
You actually made a good joke. I make all the good jokes.
Fashion Critiques
00:43:09
Speaker
You actually made a funny joke. He was dressed the fuck up, Moe Dog. I was, Moe Dog.
00:43:15
Speaker
I had a pearl snap on. I look good. I got a lot of compliments for my wedding attire.
00:43:22
Speaker
Lock it. I don't do suits. I don't do suits. i Like I said, red by my man, Blake showed
00:43:28
Speaker
up. I look good. Everything I wear, I look good. Whatever. whatever I don't know. I'm looking at George in the hat right now. I'm like, bleh. Don't yourself.
00:43:40
Speaker
Hmm? It's two digits with extra and negative negative 99. See, I like a fucking emo at the wedding. like I just learned about that, Macy.
00:43:55
Speaker
Clock it. What did she say? She said clock it. I just learned about that. Clock it? Yeah. My daughter's taught me that. Clock it. It's a TikTok thing. Six, seven.
00:44:06
Speaker
Duh. Wow. but Okay. You're fucking cringe. I have good grades this year, Brittany. Good job, girl. He made up funny. I did not go barefoot. I did not go barefoot, in Jersey.
00:44:21
Speaker
I could have. I should have. I should have showed up there. Hell yeah, Macy. She has on the good grades. She wanted to hear you talk more. She likes you. I don't know what that means. Kids are stupid, Robert. That's what it means. Clock it.
00:44:38
Speaker
Macy, fuck you. That's my niece. Fuck.
00:44:46
Speaker
Let's just say she's not old enough to be here, but she was raised by a monkey, which is basically the equivalent of being raised by monkeys. So it's okay. Macy, get out of here.
00:45:00
Speaker
I'm going to call your dad in a second. but Don't do shoes. but Don't be wearing no shoes. not this shoes That's real. Never mind. I can't fucking say I have that one. I'm weird feeling saying.
00:45:18
Speaker
Macy, get out here, girl. Get out of here. going to kick you out. Jesus. but I love you. I
00:45:33
Speaker
and know you listen to this all the time. Girl. New skis? Oh, my God. No, dog. Are you skis?
00:45:44
Speaker
<unk>ky back phone call yeah no uh i got brandon fucking skis when i was 12 we didn't even have the internet oh shit that's that's so that's that's element but stop like of in the microwave the grass is longer than the trees and then the more you bring it up the more it fucking happens which fucking sucks but andall shit girl on that shit own that shit don't be mad at it own that
00:46:25
Speaker
yeah sucks it hurts ah deep is thats all of a sudden Macy, to sleep. Get off my fucking podcast right now.
00:46:36
Speaker
She said back in my days. Shut up. You're 12, Macy. Back in my days. Exactly. Get off of here. Her dad and her... That's funny.
00:46:51
Speaker
Yeah.
YouTube History
00:46:52
Speaker
Her dad doesn't care. ah I would have to go and look at my original account. I don't i think I've had it since 2005. I love you. oh she said oh okay oh by good bye again bye macy it was nice meeting you mean yeah and yourself keep getting them good grades girl yeah yeah that's good grades keep it up love you and then robert plasminum also i've had this youtube account since 2006. plaster them robert blasted them
00:47:27
Speaker
robert b blasing um Oh, shit. Go, go. Your auntie love you. Your auntie love you.
00:47:37
Speaker
Your auntie love you. know you Hey. Okay. That's what's up, man. Love you, too. That's what's Love you, too, Robert. Love you. Love you. Love you.
00:47:53
Speaker
so much Hey, no shame in this man's game. He fucking loves you. And he's like, fuck it. yeah Britney's my bitch. He's going to get Britney. He's going to get his Britney bitch tattooed across his chest like like Tupac had Thug Life right across his belly. It's Britney bitch. Thank you, Robert. You're dope.
00:48:21
Speaker
ah but Robert's an OG around here, man. That's my guy. that's guy he's been for a long minute yeah he's been showing up so thank you robert and
00:48:35
Speaker
don't talk to my fucking niece again you brought her in here i know i was so worried about it too i was like amazing like i'll send you the link but like chill
00:49:04
Speaker
gang gang britney gang and ability gang bangs for like i mean wait what and and and and she that yeah
00:49:17
Speaker
hu you chi I don't know i how to do that. You said yes ma'am. be here I was gonna get a new song. It's really addicted to Britney bitch.
00:49:30
Speaker
Well, not sure. She's got, she's got to keep memory out addicted to Britney bitch.
00:49:46
Speaker
Are you referring to addicted to love? mo
00:49:52
Speaker
Where's that at? Oh, I see.
American Psycho Review
00:50:04
Speaker
Okay. Yeah. but I almost said Huey Lewis in the news and then I was going to make an American Psycho reference and do a little. But then I was like, wait, that's Robert Palmer. It's not Huey Lewis. And then that just wouldn't count into it.
00:50:18
Speaker
And if you haven't seen American Psycho, you wouldn't even understand what I'm talking about anyways. Probably one of Christian Bale's greatest roles. RIP Jared Leto at American Psycho. I was about to say what?
00:50:33
Speaker
I'm obviously sober. Why are you sober, Mo Dog? It's Saturday. i got your reference, Mo Dog. I know. Dixit to Love was huge hit in the 80s. It was.
00:50:46
Speaker
Whatever. Megan loves that click. She loves it.
00:50:52
Speaker
What? American Psycho? It's great movie. My son wants to watch it. my son's like My son's like, I want to watch that movie. and I was like, yeah, you should probably wait like another five, ten more years before you watch that.
00:51:03
Speaker
Wait, how old did you say it again? He's 12. 12. So like No, he's not ready for American Psycho. Have you seen American Psycho? There's a whole scene where he's having a threesome and he looks at the camera and he's just like, wow, he's flexing. Great arms on Christian Bale. He was clicking the hell out of those horses.
00:51:30
Speaker
but Maybe when he was 18. He's little bit older. Not quite 12. We've watched some questionable movies. I never watched the I never watched i I didn't even know it was a book I don't read books books are boring books are friends because you're fucking stupid you're me head that's why you watch football and you and that works I'm very sensitive I watch musicals I like rom-coms I like nice walks nice walks on a moonlit night on the beach
00:52:08
Speaker
like musical commercials with puppies make me cry my god i totally believe it too that's why i'm like fight me bro i feel like i'm more tough than you are you're a little softy i'm a big softy yeah genesis yeah man with uh phil collins genesis hell yeah it's also a great book in the bibble It's the first book in the Bible.
00:52:39
Speaker
Yeah. Hey, look who went to church camp. Look who went to church camp. Yes, she wasn't just bagging at church camp. She actually learned a thing or two.
00:52:55
Speaker
Sorry, can't give you a blowjob today. Gonna read the Bible. Gonna read the Bibble. typically Starting with Genesis. First book. and oh my god and on the first day click created like shut the up i hate you i don't like i hate you like said let there be like floors probably a good thing she can search
00:53:24
Speaker
probably good thing maan she has nurse
00:53:32
Speaker
Peter Gabriel? Oh, shit. Yeah, Peter Gabriel was in in Genesis. Genesis had a couple different... Peter Gabriel, was that something? forget the song, even though I went to church camp.
00:53:46
Speaker
It has nothing to do with church. It has nothing to do with church. Whatever. Yeah,
00:53:57
Speaker
yeah it shows that I grew up in church. Yeah.
00:54:02
Speaker
Peter Gabriel. Fucking asshole. Peter Gabriel. He was did evening really and something.
00:54:16
Speaker
There was sign language we did all, too. Whatever.
00:54:22
Speaker
I don't remember. But yeah, we learned that song in church camp.
00:54:30
Speaker
And... jeff the Also, like to but like the burning bush. The burning bush. You should see a doctor so you can get a prescription for penicillin if you've got a burning bush.
00:54:47
Speaker
Okay. I'm just saying. Herphosyphalitis? Probably. um Crabs? whos not No. Talk to Chris about that. Chris?
00:55:00
Speaker
No. Chris, you got crabs, bro? From Maryland. But, no. I'm not going to go there, but there's... And you're... You nasty.
00:55:11
Speaker
He didn't get crabs from Maryland. Son of a bitch. Got to chat with Tony Banks. Oh, hell yeah. Wait, Tony Banks? Like, wait, what the fuck?
00:55:25
Speaker
got's a chat with to thanks oh yeah but tony bag like yeah but the wait he's got a hancock
00:55:43
Speaker
no never mind i'm not no not never mind i'm thinking of somebody else sweet back got it i dated her what are you doing with him but journey what are you doing with him some things were things off here wait where's ron where's ron yeah i you know what i think i'm gonna leave because you know the last two weeks i haven't been here and the panel's been hopping i come back after two weeks and it's i'm stuck with yeah nobody wants to hang out with you maybe we're just gonna call it a short night maybe you know what i appreciate you britney for being the only one that wants to hang out with me you're a good friend
00:56:27
Speaker
And I know that if I had to puke, if I had to puke, you'd hold my hair back. Even though it would be a comic book to watch you like, oh, I almost got it. Yeah, literally. I'll just hold your hair with my with my finger toes. Is that cool?
00:56:43
Speaker
That's fine. Appreciate it. Appreciate you. Appreciate you, girl. Gotcha. Dude, when's your wedding happening?
00:56:56
Speaker
Whose wedding?
00:57:00
Speaker
Who's wedding? Moe Dog in Jersey? Yeah, sure. I'm not in my feels.
00:57:10
Speaker
Nobody loves me. Everybody hates me. I'm just going to go eat worms. All things are too explosive video to. yeah We've we've got to do it. but but yeah I specifically put this show is not meant for kids. And then somebody invites children into the chat. stop she she's gone now she godam though she's she's god damn degenerate
Podcast Dynamics
00:57:34
Speaker
she is that that's my girl macy's my girl but i know because her dad and the girl that he's married to and now like they do let them curse here and they're in the house she's 12 but you know whatever
00:57:53
Speaker
so i was like yeah he'll be okay with it i was like just ask your dad first and then i'll send you the link i didn't know she was gonna comment as much as she did whatever so he's from part of motorcycle club so and he listens to metal music so my girls they listen to metal Yeah, I have videos of them in the back seat. If Britt says okay, fuck Brittany.
00:58:29
Speaker
Brittany's the life of the party. I am the fucking life of the party, dude. Yeah, dude. Yeah, dude. Yeah, dude. Shut up. You so are, dude.
00:58:43
Speaker
but Fucking dude. About to make some dindin. And then if Britt says it's okay, I'm going to come up. Brittany's life of the party. sure. I love Dude, listen, dude.
00:58:56
Speaker
I'm down with no dogs. no vol I love me some MoDog. MoDog's been great since he yeah since he came up in the chatterbox and came up on the first the first show. MoDog's always been cool.
00:59:08
Speaker
Good people. He likes to talk shit, but I'm down with it. no ah Let's go. Dude. Yeah. but I do say dude a lot.
00:59:22
Speaker
Dude. Dude. Dude. What, dude? What can dude? Dude. Dude. This is going to be great, dude. What's him do? Let me tell you something,
00:59:36
Speaker
dude. I do say a lot. I do. Fuck. Dude. Dude. yeah
00:59:50
Speaker
That should be one of the fucking banners on me. Dude. Dude. Listen, dude. yeah Dude.
01:00:02
Speaker
Dude, bro. Dude, bro. Dude, bro, listen. He's a Marine. Of course he's cool. Yeah, true. He's Marine. I mean, not all Marines are cool, let's be honest. Just because in the military don't mean you're cool.
01:00:14
Speaker
True. Facts. A lot of Marines have the bonus points when it comes to IQ. Okay.
01:00:26
Speaker
But Marines are tough as fuck. I will say. Marines are definitely tough as fuck. And I will stand up for Iraq. Let's go. What are you doing, Cash?
01:00:38
Speaker
What are you doing? yeah Go eat so you can come up here, my Do you want to take a break? Okay.
01:00:46
Speaker
What are doing? Is it your new kitty?
01:01:01
Speaker
I was trying to figure out what Cash was doing. He's sitting at the dining room table. And he was just playing at the table. He's sitting at the table, not on the table. he was just sitting He's just sitting at the table eating hot Cheetos. He's probably stoned.
01:01:15
Speaker
uh he's black anyways did you say wait did you say he's black i'm pretty sure my son's not black i'll get you super happy for you guys you guys are like
01:01:33
Speaker
super happy for you guys you guys are lost i like fuck offs Moe Dog, get your fucking ass in here.
01:01:45
Speaker
Eat your food. Fucking scarf it up. You're a Marine. You're a Marine. You know how to fucking eat it fast. Like, come on. Eat that shit though i have
01:01:59
Speaker
shit. You know? You might be onto something, Brittany. That's the Navy. That's how the Navy eats. Not the Marine.
01:02:10
Speaker
Brittany's being racist. I got accused being racist today. Racist. Racist.
01:02:18
Speaker
There's no T. Racist. Yeah, racist. Eat it faster.
01:02:26
Speaker
Jesus. Hashtag eat it faster.
01:02:36
Speaker
you said it jersey thought you got a face me yourself
01:02:43
Speaker
Yeah, lazy Jedi, get your fucking ass in here before I kick your fucking ass. The default motherfucker.
01:02:52
Speaker
Brittany will show you how to go. Cause I'm like cocks. Fuck you.
01:02:59
Speaker
No, that's a turkey. don't get it. Oh, I love my way. Oh my God. You like to, you like to gobble. Whoa. Whoa. a well but whoa it's like man it vibrates his taint bro yeah dude and like just get out all you c one it's like vibration dig it yeah
01:03:30
Speaker
he digs it i do and it is' very and vibrates his taste bro yeah yeah but
01:03:44
Speaker
He doesn't get his fucking ass in here. Run, kids, run! Run, bitch, run! Yeah, you mother bitch. Yeah, get in here, you ass ass. Hey, make sure you get my you get mine.
01:04:01
Speaker
modog Don't be stingy with the purple crayons. Crayons. Don't be stingy. That just reminds me of the one cartoon with the Maya and the purple crayons.
01:04:13
Speaker
what I did a tattoo for somebody. It's something with the purple crayon. Okay. Google is good. You know, I could do that. I'm glad you're entertaining yourself over there.
01:04:26
Speaker
Sorry, my my audio wasn't working for a minute. Dude, i thought you were gonna I thought we were about to get wiener bombed on a fake account. I was like, My finger was on the chin. I was like, the hey we're about it we're about to get a dick at any time, ladies and gentlemen. Wait, wait, wait. Hold on. Hold on.
01:04:45
Speaker
Harold's in the purple crayon. Do you remember that? Yeah. Robert Puckman, were you in the Corps? Are you fellow Marine? Okay, did I?
01:04:57
Speaker
You get it now.
01:05:00
Speaker
Thank you, Brittany. I need that in my life. Thank you for joining us. sense Oh, shit. How do I change my... Took you long enough. I know, I know, I know. Is it because my 12-year-old... There we go. Now you got bombed.
01:05:15
Speaker
Now you got bombed. yeah No, no. Apparently, this was this was the... You should see some of the new shit, Scotto, came up for me.
01:05:26
Speaker
God damn it. Apparently, this was my avatar after being gone for two weeks. What? and i was like what the is that happening so scotto made a ah whole nother line of pfps for me that have me in cowboy apparel in the gayest possible way where is scotto i wish scott doesn't give me some pretty funny actually mean it's gross you know what robert platinum uh modog introduced me to the purple crayons and uh you know i'm a fan and and and
01:06:01
Speaker
And i'm I'm mad at some of my Marine friends for holding out on me this long. You sons of bitches. I thought we was cool. I thought we was cool. I thought we was cool.
01:06:13
Speaker
By the way, you guys are going to have to listen to my washer in the background. Shocking, Robert Platinum. The black guy likes the purple crowns. Is that like purple drank? ah You know that?
01:06:24
Speaker
It was pretty good. You got kicked out. Oh, shit. like the green paint. Yeah, that's what was saying. Yeah.
01:06:32
Speaker
in the kitchen making my sandwich her jedi's voice pop the boner what the hell it happens
01:06:40
Speaker
good happens yeah i did i I wasn't going to say anything, MoDog, but I'm glad you outed yourself like that. i was i was just going keep my boner to myself, but since we're sharing. yeah Glick just tucked his up into his waistband.
01:07:00
Speaker
You cracking heat there, Glick? Nope, just my dick.
01:07:05
Speaker
It's pointing due north.
01:07:09
Speaker
It's looking at me. It's creeping me out. Stop staring at bro. I don't like it when it's one eye makes eye contact with my two eyes. Don't make eye contact, you son of a bitch.
01:07:22
Speaker
Oh, did it just wink? How did it learn that? You're learning new tricks, little buddy. Oh, my God. Actually, a cyclops, if you think about it, they can only wink. They can't really blink. Wouldn't that be a blink? I mean, wouldn't that be a blink and not a wink?
01:07:39
Speaker
No, it's a wink. Permanent winks. Okay, so what about Medusa?
01:07:47
Speaker
Wait, what? Medusa when she found out. She had snakes for her. She had snakes for her. Yeah, that's what we're technically ti i was talking about. Dicks, snakes, one-eyed snakes, right?
01:08:00
Speaker
Yeah, that makes sense of this. That is what we were talking about. All right. peeping up for the conversation so I'm having a hard time. ah I said I wasn't getting drunk tonight. lied.
01:08:12
Speaker
gives not i mean, we have to after this conversation. So we're talking about Cyclops and Moe Dogging Glick's dick.
01:08:25
Speaker
And Medusa, she's got snakes on her head, and they're kind of like being a Cyclops and having a dick, but they're just on her head. um um I'm figuring this out. I'm walking through this because I think Brittany's onto something. i think she's onto something. Brittany's brain is a fucking labyrinth. Just trying to get to the center. Hold on a second. Is David Bowie wearing a codpiece?
01:08:48
Speaker
Is David Bowie going to pop up wearing a codpiece?
01:08:52
Speaker
It's fucking well, David Bowie. It's the babe. It's the babe. It's the babe.
01:09:00
Speaker
Thank you for joining us, Jedi. One of the DIs said that I was the worst recruiting ever seen. Jesus Christ, Robert. Oh, my God. This conversation is so relevant.
01:09:14
Speaker
It's out of control. I feel like I should start doing drugs so that I can understand these. Help me help you. Listen. Help me help you.
01:09:26
Speaker
Dude. Dude. Drugs are great, dude. Yeah, dude. Yeah, dude. Fuck you.
01:09:37
Speaker
What's happening right now?
01:09:40
Speaker
I'm pressing charges. making press say the Oh, shrimp. Let's go. Hell yeah. i say dude all the time when he's making fun anyone i you ohrimp know the band would tell you might be it's good he yeah Robert Platinum, that's a lie. You're black, first and foremost. I know better than that. Don't lie to me, but yes. I agree.
01:10:05
Speaker
Conversations about my D. nothing yeah well yeah Have I ever won? CPR. Or the harmless. so ah The Good Place. she No, we've already established this.
01:10:19
Speaker
Yes, she loves shrimp. And endless shrimp is one of her wishes in it. I fucking love shrimp. yeah dude totally dude you know blu you love shrimp but you got crabs dude i love them both i can love both dude listen dude man man man listen dave yeah man that's another one bad man Man, dude.
01:10:54
Speaker
Did you see that man dude over there by chance? that We call that a Sasquatch. His name is Glick. Let's go.
01:11:07
Speaker
See that man dude? and yeah Man dude. What's up? I prefer Sasquatch, but dude. Come on, dude. Let's go, dude.
01:11:18
Speaker
okay please Baby, baby, let's go. I got a tattoo. What does mine say? Dude. yeah You know what? Is that from Dealer's My Car?
01:11:32
Speaker
Yeah. What mine say? Sweet. No, no, what does mine say? Dude. No, dude. What does mine say? Dude. Dude. Dude. yeah and yeah black du listen you Yeah, that's a good one.
01:11:54
Speaker
Yeah. have it Chris, Chris, come here. Hi, Chris. Run Chris, run. Come here, fucker. Run, dude.
01:12:05
Speaker
Run, dude. Run, dude. Run, dude. Run, dude. Run. Dude, should do that thing like you're walking, but do it faster, dude. Yeah, dude. That's him. Hey,
01:12:18
Speaker
by going to start doing this now randomly and it's going to piss a lot of people off. It's Brittany. It came Brittany tonight. It just happened. It's Brittany, dude. i'm goingnna start doing this now randomly and it's going to piss a lot of people around du what du hear what i said' big is britney came for brittany tonight it just happened it's britney did It's Brittany, bitch.
01:12:40
Speaker
It's Brittany, dude. It's Brittany, dude. It's Brittany, dude. You got to make one for that. It's Brittany, dude. It's Brittany, dude.
01:12:51
Speaker
Brittany, if you were my woman, you would have an endless supply. Oh, my God. Or crabs. She's already got crabs. Do you want to give her more crabs? Yeah. Double the crabs? Let's go. Double the crabs, negative the Negative the IQ.
01:13:08
Speaker
I was going to say, Jeff, that is not even a problem.
01:13:16
Speaker
Fucking drink. Cheers, y'all. Wow. Stop, dude. Stop. Stop. Stop, dude. Robert's going need penicillin, dude. Yeah, dude.
01:13:27
Speaker
What up? What up, little dude? Yeah, dude. What up, little dude? Welcome. Oh, man. Fuck off, dude. Fuck off, dude, man. Fuck. Robert, that is not a mission you should accept if you choose to.
01:13:42
Speaker
Stay STD-free.
01:13:45
Speaker
my issue is robert by that is not a mission like it's not a mission you should accept if you choose to stay s twod three Yeah. ah so talk to good talk to Go talk to Jeff about STDs.
01:14:00
Speaker
They're not as fun as they sound. They're not as fun as they sound. Yeah.
01:14:07
Speaker
I have three of them. I got three STDs. They're 20, 16, and 12. Oh, my God. You fucking just said that. can't believe it. All right. Cheers to that. Cheers. Cheers.
01:14:18
Speaker
yeah right cheers that cheers We're drink away that memory. Cheers, dude. Cheers.
01:14:29
Speaker
Cheers, dude. Hey, man. Hey, man, dude. Hey, man, dude. Cheers. Hey, man, dude. Dude, man. Hey, man, dude. Dude, man. Hey, dude, man. going to use that, dude, man.
01:14:41
Speaker
Hey, man. Welcome to my podcast, dude. Hey, dude, man.
01:14:50
Speaker
I got to start opening my shows that way. my Podcast dudes. Dudes and do dads. and Welcome to my my podcast, This is Smooth Brain Central, dudes.
01:15:09
Speaker
Nipples, fudge, ice cream, cookies, rain on the hot sunroof. There's a car in the lake.
01:15:17
Speaker
I don't understand what's happening here. I think you finally gave Glick Tourette's 2. but
01:15:26
Speaker
Pretty fade. don't know which one, honestly. We got to get the dude incorporated in and in the fade. You're just talking and you're just like, dude. OK, I'm going to do it.
01:15:39
Speaker
I'm going to do it. I'm going to do it. I'm going to do it. I'm going to do it. I'm going to do it, dude. I'm going to do it, dude.
01:15:50
Speaker
I'm a dead dude. Just tell my girlfriend how great Saturday nights are. She's finally watching going, this motherfucker's retarded and his friends are stupid.
01:16:03
Speaker
Wait, what girlfriend? Exactly. Yeah, explain. There's no explanation needed. you are gonna He's ordering them in bulk at this point. thank you we've been talking We've been talking for a little minute. We've been talking for a little minute. Dude, what have you been talking about for a little minute?
01:16:23
Speaker
Life, dude, life, the weather, dude. Dude, man. Sounds yeah' paid favorite that's pretty deep, dude. yeah we yeah We're pretty deep. and She's an Ohio State fan. I'm a Michigan fan.
01:16:35
Speaker
Dude, did conversation is intense. Spicy. Spice it up. Dude, that's nice. Perfection. Long time listener, first time caller. who Welcome. world Perfection. that's chris Thanks for calling, dude.
01:16:52
Speaker
ah dude hey du run du here You guys broke my brain I can't stop. ah
01:17:07
Speaker
is the number one Mac daddy. but micy you Say it right Robert Platinum. Say it with your chest. I'm the Mickey Mac. Mickey Mac. that is That is slur behavior. That's slur behavior.
01:17:22
Speaker
She's got whole orchard worth of Adam's apples at his disposal. I take it back. She's good.
01:17:31
Speaker
and but no should wait hold on so like what got a whole orchard worth of fucking adam's apples at his disposal
01:17:43
Speaker
lorddo said wait i tell you back she's good She's a Buckeye fan. Oh, yeah, we've already been. Yeah, miggity, miggity, miggity, mack. Miggity, mack. Hey. I better be careful before we get copywritten.
01:17:56
Speaker
or I get in trouble for being a white guy. Cultury approach. Oh, you just invented your own language there. That's how Sasquatch speak, okay? That's Squatchian, motherfucker. That's Sasquatchian. Sasquatchian. I'm going to get canceled for cultural appropriation. with click You need to download Babbel. It will teach you. It's Glickle.
01:18:21
Speaker
Glickle. Glickle. he go light roll Go glickel your pickle. Calm down. See, we are family. See, we just did the same exact fucking thing, dude.
01:18:43
Speaker
Dude, this is crazy, dude. Oh, my God. oh i god I can't believe YouTube hasn't pulled this stream down immediately. It's not a good problem. ah but
01:18:55
Speaker
I couldn't get away with half the shit on my show, okay? That's because you guys are unimportant. No, I'm just kidding. i like mean like You know what? You guys get in trouble because you, you like, Canadians come up there.
01:19:07
Speaker
I was going to come in last night, and then I said, Steve, the Canadian was in there. And I'm like, fuck that guy. He needs a haircut. That's all I'm saying. He needs his life cut.
01:19:18
Speaker
Whoa. Calm down, dude. Calm down, dude. and and david Listen, man. Listen, dude. He's Canadian. dude but He's going to be the 50% dude. didn't know about 50% dude. Oh my gosh. They're real people, dude. ah He's from the deep north, dude.
01:19:37
Speaker
I like that show. The great north. That cartoon that has... The They're Canadians.
01:19:50
Speaker
It's the cartoon...
01:19:53
Speaker
Yeah, his name is Steve the Canadian. Yeah, well, I'm not Canadian, so I don't know about their cartoons. Or you're True, true, cultural appropriation requires roaches. No, we're not going to just culture-appropriate them. We're going to appropriate their whole country into the 50th or 100th. Are you serious? Can we just eliminate? Can we just drop nukes on their entire country? Oh, Jesus. Oh, there's my avatar. Damn it, damn it. Jesus fucking Christ. I forgot to change it.
01:20:25
Speaker
Oh no the swamp things are multiplying. Yep, yep. Oh shit balls. Fuck. Where is it? Fuck. Yes. Oh. Sorry.
01:20:37
Speaker
This is my threats coming out. Let's go. take a break. Maybe I guess. I don't know what he's doing. Like share, subscribe. Uh, apps. but chi hang Brittany just started panic clicking things.
01:20:53
Speaker
Okay,
01:21:01
Speaker
kind so this, if you're seeing my pics, this is my dress, guys. a Fuck you. um I like it. That's another one.
01:21:12
Speaker
That's another one. I say fuck off. Or no, I say fuck off usually. There's this one chick that I watch that has all these little like really big takes where she just screams or says random things and it's the fucking most entertaining shit ever. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.
01:21:28
Speaker
And there is a... See, I'm sorry. There is like a documentary on one chick now. I haven't watched the full thing yet, but yeah, talking about it...
01:21:40
Speaker
Yeah. Is Brittany, I do want to ask you don't feel free to tell me shut the fuck up, but is there something that brings on any of your takes or is it just all random? things Anxiety, definitely lack of sleep.
01:21:55
Speaker
And then like when people bring it up. Oh. Yeah. So like this dude thing. It makes sense. If you feel your eye twitching and somebody's like your eye's twitching it makes it fucking twitch more. you know like it's like It's one of those things where you point it out and then you can't help but not focus on it. It's not terrible. It just like it just it makes my body stiff and it fucking hurts after a while. But I don't care talking about it.
01:22:22
Speaker
Fuck off. Fuck. Shit. See? You know Everybody says that when Glick's around. I think Glick brings it on from everybody. He he creates... head there busy Fuck off. Fuck off.
01:22:33
Speaker
ah god Yeah, yeah, yeah. Fuck off. Yeah, fuck off. That's the one... that When I say fuck off, it usually is to Glick. I know. yeah Excellent. an Excellent, dude. Excellent,
01:22:51
Speaker
i like too The snozzberries do taste like snozzberries.
Weed and Secrets
01:22:58
Speaker
Man. Oh, my God.
01:23:02
Speaker
Smoke some weed, man. Oh, fuck. Oh, my God. Littery, man. Littery, man. I give up. I fucking give up. I fucking give up. I need to smoke some weed.
01:23:15
Speaker
Blick brings on the text. Shut up, Robert Platinum. Stop giving away all my goddamn secrets. I will poison your beard. He does bring up a text, but it's okay. It's fine. ah It's okay. Diddy dead.
01:23:28
Speaker
Does he? Dead. Dead. Dead. I did. Totally. Fuck off equals diddy party. Woo woo. Diddy party, diddy party. There ain't going to be no more. There's no more diddy parties for four years, okay?
01:23:42
Speaker
Ain't no party like a diddy party. Unless you come to a party. Thank God. There's a diddy party you can't remember. What are you talking about?
Diddy Party Jokes
01:23:50
Speaker
ah a glick party makes a ditty party it looks like a look like a church prayer meeting bro bro whatever dude yeah okay i'm i'm uncanceable extra oh hello yep those are involved in glick parties they're usually bigger but he's got one right now keep some sharp yeah he has a tail attached to it too i do and if i stand up and push a button and tail spins and i can fly hell yeah dude fuck Oh, fuck yeah.
01:24:21
Speaker
Yeah, fuck yeah, dude. Fuck yeah, dude. Dude, my tail spins, dude. Dude, you want see my tail? really he
Cartoon Nostalgia and Glick Parties
01:24:29
Speaker
said it Wait, Tailspin was a great cartoon back in the day.
01:24:33
Speaker
Tailspin's a great sidekick. Sonic. Or not Tailspin, but Tails. Just Tails. Yeah, Tails. yeah so Are you thinking about DuckTales? Wait, hold on a Tailspins? Are you thinking about DuckTales and not Tails?
01:24:48
Speaker
No, tailspin. On a skateboard? No, that's a kickflip. Both are ah two different things. where all just build up song We're all going smooth brain at the same time. and We're all trying to figure out what each other is saying. And none of us can articulate anything that makes sense. I'm the only one that's kind of sound.
01:25:11
Speaker
I'm pretty sure tailspin was a fucking cartoon. It had had the rescue rangers and all. um yeah ah Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah. Chippendale. Chippendale's Rescue Rangers. i don't think that and I think that's what it was called, not Tailspin.
01:25:24
Speaker
I swear to God, there's one called Tailspin. There's one called Tailspin. It's a Google box. As the French says, Google. I got it. It has Faye Bonet.
01:25:35
Speaker
Glick Party. requires mar andmers blue ah yeah first glick party is We don't talk about Glick Parties. modo you signed the waiver you signed the nda yeah consensual yeah everything is consensual everything is consensual at a glick party because i make everybody sign waivers before they come through the door yeah dude get it totally dude dude man dude man sign this sign here sign here sign here initially here uh i need to print finger and blood sample and okay you're good to and he wants he needs to taste your semen to make sure legit
01:26:08
Speaker
No, I have an official semen taster at the door. um jedi will yeah Jedi has applied for that job. I didn't want to tell anybody, but I think it's looking good. Jedi may get the job. yeah know he's He's more than qualified. the he does have He does have very stiff competition.
01:26:25
Speaker
Shaman's in line to get it to him. Jedi or Shaman? I'll give you a little little bit of a... I'll let it go.
01:26:37
Speaker
Dude bread slur. Okay. I'll let it go. Do you guys take requests? Yes, we take. Yeah, we can do long distance dedications as kind of request, dude?
01:26:49
Speaker
glu is blue is messed up lubric it really is you guys take requests yes we take yeah yeah we can do long business dedications as well
01:27:03
Speaker
what kind of fu did
01:27:08
Speaker
That's my Scotto. Scotto, I haven't gotten to see you in forever. Please come see me tonight. Scotto, let's Oh, Scotto. Stiff competition. 80s corn movie.
01:27:20
Speaker
Actually, you know, you might be better suited for the job. I'm just saying.
01:27:28
Speaker
When Jeremy when jemy when jemy summons... Jersey. mother bad. Where's your dude?
01:27:42
Speaker
misprouned i know but and i yeah where' that where's it tough dude where's it tough but words are hard get it right fathers are yeah but not as hard as me dude not as hard as me
01:28:01
Speaker
i I shouldn't have seen it coming. That's what she said. but those ill say that's No, that's what she snorted, dude. sorney co in the building Ladies and gentlemen, Snorty Cox is in the building.
01:28:15
Speaker
And I believe Jedi gave her that name. i think I think it was Shaman. I think Shaman did. Whatever. fucking it's so It's definitely... You're never living it down, though, Brittany. I don't care.
01:28:27
Speaker
It's fine. Whatever. I'll say it. My eye had literally... Do
Music Break and Blacktop Mojo
01:28:34
Speaker
you funny is when it slips out? um Like, when you're not trying to be funny?
01:28:38
Speaker
Yeah. It's like... Totally, dude. I get it. Fuck!
01:28:48
Speaker
yeah Ass, ass, fuck, shit ass balls. Fuck you. Fuck you, dude. Yeah, Glick does have shitty ass balls, dude. I just washed them. And they're still shitty. you didn't do good Did you actually use soap?
01:29:03
Speaker
Nope, I used shit. You used hope. You used hope, not soap. I used shit. but watch I washed them with shit. i launched my balls from from down at the river you know because i'm a big foot and that's what i do feel like if they're stinking if the germs will stay away oh my god that bugs me oh my whole heart skydows here i love him so much but oh um my whole heart skys here i love him so much
01:29:36
Speaker
is he is he is he he's not here yet but want him to get on the panel he'll get on the oh shit oh shit i need another drink dude back in a minute dude all right how about we yeah maybe you want to do you want to do that if you want to ask can we um
01:29:52
Speaker
right have on yeah maybe you want to tell i wanted to eat yes but you want to we story
01:30:03
Speaker
I'm going to let you work through this. I'm going to let you work through this. All right. I'm going to go up and ask to take a break. Brady develops floor heads. it Quick, send out the bus signal.
01:30:17
Speaker
Can we take break, please? but man would bring are but Do you want to take a break? Do to take a break?
01:30:31
Speaker
Do you want to take a break? Okay, we're going to take a break. We're going to take a break, Dave. Dad, we're going to take a break, Dave. I'm going give you... oh Am I choosing? No, I'm choosing.
01:30:49
Speaker
like Okay, cool. I'm going to give you... my God. oh my god I need a break. You need a break.
01:31:03
Speaker
Yes, dude. I do. I need a break. You know what? I'm going to do a little Blacktop Mojo with their reimagination. I'm going to give you guys three minutes for a break.
01:31:19
Speaker
Check out Blacktop Mojo. I'm going to show the guys some love. And we'll be right back.
01:32:03
Speaker
you'll
Musical Preferences
01:32:05
Speaker
see What can make me feel this way My girl
01:32:51
Speaker
you say What can it be This way, my girl Talking about
01:33:25
Speaker
She took all money, me back my name, and she left me all alone, standing in the rain.
01:34:16
Speaker
I guess you'll sleep What can make me feel this
01:34:45
Speaker
There we go. My mic wasn't coming back on. What's going on, everybody? yeah We are back. What a voice. What a voice indeed. What a voice indeed. That is one and only Matt James, lead singer of Blacktop Mojo. Check him out literally everywhere at Blacktop Mojo.
01:34:59
Speaker
Also, check out Matt James. And if Brittany asks me to take a break again tonight, I will give you, because Matt James does solo work, I will give you one of his songs as well.
01:35:10
Speaker
The guy's got an amazing voice on him. Also,
Social Media Laughter
01:35:14
Speaker
Pretty good friends. They've been really good to to us and and myself. And if they weren't so goddamn busy, they would have probably already been on multiple shows.
01:35:26
Speaker
If I tried to get my voice that high, my testicles. I i sing my ass off to that song every time. um don'ting up his I don't think I can sing like him, but in my head, sound just like him.
01:35:38
Speaker
Yeah, I'm sure. Blacktop Mojo is one of my favorite bands out there. place geneison Genius remake dudes. Yeah, that was a complete reimagination.
01:35:51
Speaker
This is live, flawed perfection. We are 100% live. Nice I'll
01:36:03
Speaker
post that link again, maybe. I got you, Dave. I got you, Dave. Yeah, Dave. I got you. It's linked it. I posted it. linkedin dead man listen listen man help it it ah see it he like that's scary
Physical Comedy Antics
01:36:29
Speaker
no it dude i'm scared of you bitch i was trying to help i was trying to help your hiccups did oh i know they never had up right i right now know what you need to do to get you a big drink of water
01:36:43
Speaker
Bend over, touch your toes and swallow that shit.
01:36:47
Speaker
Seriously. like Bend over as far as you can. Get a big drink of water. Bend over. This is not weird. This is like what I do when I get hiccups. I also usually do a little wiggle because I'm in the shower room at the gym with all the other guys.
01:37:01
Speaker
line That's rec beside the point. That's beside the point. When I get hiccups, I'll get a big drink of water. And then I'll bend over as far as I can and and swallow it. And it forces open that flat in your whatever that's called. That gives you hips. Probably never. Probably never.
01:37:27
Speaker
Definitely weird, dude. You're not in a motherfucking thing, Jedi. Where are you? The fuck? We can get rid of your eyes. I'm getting rid of your ass.
01:37:37
Speaker
um ah
01:37:40
Speaker
No, I do need to grab some water. Dude, I can't hear you. What? Hold on one second. You're gonna have to carry
01:37:52
Speaker
Definitely weird, dude.
01:37:56
Speaker
Super fucking weird, dude. Yeah,
Glick's Couch Antics
01:37:58
Speaker
dude. He went to go bend over, dude, so that he could touch his and somebody could give him a nice surprise, dude. Yeah, dude. looking like bending seriously fucking broke my brain britney with it all this dude i can't stop now you're welcome dude she's got it that's funny as would you like it scotta do you want to see him bending over he bought he bought front row seats to that he's got tickets all right he bends over oh i did not mean to do that whoa party foul
01:38:36
Speaker
yeah my My mouse clicked it. I'm sorry. He bends over as far as he can. Then Scotto appears and weirdly enough forgets about his hiccups.
01:38:49
Speaker
Fuck you, dude. I have hiccups right now. i hope How much are tickets? Depends, dude. It's negotiable. If you subscribe to the Glick and Lazy OnlyFans, it's $9.99 a month, dude.
01:39:05
Speaker
The hiccups will be the least of this problems. Yup. We got to up our prices, dude. Yeah, dude. 169 dollars. Oh my fucking God, dude.
01:39:19
Speaker
yeah then hundred and sixty i have outlet right
01:39:31
Speaker
oh my fucking aunt dan
01:39:39
Speaker
Oh my God. we we're joking about it so much, it makes it so much funnier when you say it for real without doing it. I don't
01:39:51
Speaker
know why. Yeah, dude, it does. All right. I'm going to keep it up. I'm here. I'm here. We can get canceled. Fuck it. Scotty, you like to play with it, dude?
01:40:05
Speaker
Jersey. Jersey. Oh my god, lazy. I don't know what- or not- lazy Jedi. What the fuck did call you? don't know what the- lazy. Lazy.
01:40:16
Speaker
Tell me whatever you want, dude. That's it.
01:40:22
Speaker
What? Pass. Pass. Sorry. Sorry.
01:40:25
Speaker
that yes ah sorry By D's dictionary. He's super educated, dude. He knows all the words.
01:40:36
Speaker
Oh my god. Oh my god. Oh my god.
01:40:46
Speaker
um Default dude.
01:40:49
Speaker
Hey Sasquatch, you look bummed like somebody caught a picture of you. What's going on? What's poppin'? I'm currently scrubbing the internet if I said picture. I was doing questionable things.
01:41:02
Speaker
We know, dude. Man, listen. indeed but squash does in the way and and What a squash does in the comfort of his own force should not be photographed.
01:41:14
Speaker
yeah And he should not be judged for. Same as what a Shrek does, dude. What a Shrek does in their swamp. Oh my dude.
01:41:26
Speaker
Click. Why the look on your face? It looks like your butthole's hurting. Maybe my butthole is hurting. Maybe I slept on Scotto's couch last night. And we all know what happens if you sleep on Scotto's Was it the casting couch, dude?
01:41:40
Speaker
Dude. I didn't know until it was already too late, but apparently, dude. dude
01:41:48
Speaker
On a scale of 1 to 10, how crusty was it, dude?
Cultural Misunderstandings
01:41:53
Speaker
I give it a crust rating of seven. He said he recently cleaned. Dude. That's like a Dave Portnoy right rating, dude. Dude.
01:42:05
Speaker
Wait, we so is is higher better or lower better in this rating system?
01:42:12
Speaker
Higher is always better, dude. Especially in golf. If we're going higher is better, then I'm going to give it a 9.5. It's high quality. Ooh. Crust to couch ratio? You were sleeping on some pristine, crusty protein, dude.
01:42:29
Speaker
Crust to couch ratio? On the money, dude.
01:42:37
Speaker
I think we killed Brittany, dude. I think we killed Brittany, dude. You bastard. You bastard. yeah master but
01:42:51
Speaker
it's a clock it's a coctionary come on get your sounds like a sticky situation dude get it get it my dad scott doesn' sounds like a sticky situation du that and that on but you make fun i me for this today you heard yeah like good time da yeah my dad I'm not your dude. I'm not your that's a amazing
01:43:24
Speaker
I'm not your dude. I'm not your dude. I call him padre. ah call him padre. I'm not your bruh.
01:43:37
Speaker
That's my padre, man. Oh, shit. I said man. but what Is your dad Mexican? hope His this wife is Ecuadorian. that' still't know Close enough. Is your dad Mexican? No, his wife's Ecuadorian.
01:43:57
Speaker
but Also, he doesn't speak like any Spanish. Is your dad Mexican? No, but my cousin has diabetes.
01:44:15
Speaker
like What?
01:44:19
Speaker
Speak Spanish, you fucks. Well, I guess if they speak Spanish, they're Mexican, sons of bitches.
01:44:31
Speaker
No, my dad is as white as can be. Yes. But I just say Podge. I just say Podge. I don't know. I'm too goddamn funny of a stream. I can't
01:44:50
Speaker
Yes, I just called my dad Podge. He likes Hispanic chicks. Like before his wife even. Like he dated other Hispanic chicks.
01:45:01
Speaker
Oh, yeah, I learned Spanish-ish. He just did not give fuck. You mean you can speak Spanglish? Yeah, yeah. Spanglish, basically, yeah.
01:45:14
Speaker
I can understand it more than I can speak it. Like, yeah, hearing my Padre's fucking wife's family from Ecuador speak, talking shit about us, oh, it gets me so fucking worth that.
Hiccup Remedies and Humor
01:45:31
Speaker
and like i watch because i can't understand most of it but i can't fuck speak back to them be yeah i know you I know you fucking said i just can't talk shit back in your native tongue.
01:45:43
Speaker
yeah that's why you fucking so shit exactly that fuck whoop dad and think i can say some things but it's like i i'm slower at saying it than i can understand it and it's not mexican it's ecuadorian so it's like a different dialect it's it's equis it's equislorian better off dude
01:46:20
Speaker
du but i'm so mo does that point i i don't i don't need to do the arming thing i don't like my dad's fucking wife. So she's a slurian. She's an equislorian. I hear that helps to take us by the way. Wait, you like her or you don't like her?
01:46:34
Speaker
I don't like her. Your dad's Mexican and he's in yeah, so wait, wait, what? Bro, dude. Bro, dude, man. Homie. Oh my god, my brain.
01:46:46
Speaker
Dude, buddy, homie. Dude, buddy, homie. You fucked me up. I'm smart. Not duty. I like that. that duty i like that Yeah, I like what my dog said. went to Ecuador. It was actually, it was a decent country.
01:47:06
Speaker
There were a beautiful scenes. I saw like a lot of volcanoes and shit like that. It was nice. But then you also see like a two-year-old walk into school on the dirt road with no, yeah.
01:47:21
Speaker
yeah love with that tree but you tricking laugh at now do you but yeah yeah da going she really just told someone of i think your is beautiful i'm fucking can hit you mo
01:47:42
Speaker
yeah in ecu in ecuadorent
01:47:49
Speaker
backward wow and i was the the only one that heard that ecuadorian i heard that get in ecuadorian that's still spanish does that mean i don't think they speak spanish in ecuador ecuoslor yeah they speak they speak british in great britain but they
01:48:12
Speaker
what do you want to request fall perfection is that you yeah make a request sure for thing And then subscribe to the Glick and Lazy OnlyFans and then we will do it.
01:48:32
Speaker
Okay. Fucking hiccups. Sorry.
01:48:42
Speaker
Everybody, like, share, subscribe. Oh, yeah. Do it. Do it.
Relationship Miscommunications
01:48:49
Speaker
Do my hiccups. Fucking do it. Yeah. Nine out of ten grannies approve me.
01:48:56
Speaker
And the tenth one's a cunt, so it doesn't even matter. thing No, she's dead, dude. Oh, fuck. but Still a cunt. Yeah, to die. Way to die, cunt.
01:49:10
Speaker
Your granny's a fucking cunt because she died and didn't give us that head out of bed. She was such cunt, she couldn't even live. Fucking bitch. I can't. That's what I meant. i but I like this fun.
01:49:26
Speaker
Wings, everybody. Saturday.
01:49:31
Speaker
ah think that's where my hiccups are happening, too. One, slow down on drinking. and Saturday, and two. Brittany, did you even bend over and touch your toes? No, I didn't. I still haven't even gotten water. I'll be brief.
01:49:48
Speaker
Oh wait, i thought you were doing that before the break. I was trying to, he needs to pay attention. This is your show. Yes. Sorry. right Sorry. Sorry.
01:49:59
Speaker
Oh God. Brittany. love you so much. I mean, it's, it's, it's the Brittany network now, dude. Dude. It's Brittany's network, man.
01:50:14
Speaker
It went from neglect network but' more work the Glick Network. It was the Nonsensical Network. It was never the Glick Network. Well, yeah. shes none so But then it was the Blazin Network. And then.
01:50:28
Speaker
um Now it's. Now it's Brittany Dude Man Network. Man Dude.
01:50:36
Speaker
The evolution of this network is just astounding. Because then it was the Rock Network for a while.
01:50:45
Speaker
Fuck that guy. I wish he'd show up. I really heard that guy. He does a great job. i just He does a great job. i just so I just want to say, all you assholes in the chatterbox, right here, this guy right here below me, that's what a true friend looks like.
01:50:59
Speaker
Look at him. He's here. He's here hanging out. You fuckers, you've been here the last couple weeks when I wasn't around. Now I come around you guys don't even want to be up on the panel. Oh, that kind of reminds me of my show. the time Every time I was gone, you showed up.
01:51:13
Speaker
It was one time, asshole. It was one time, asshole. One too many, motherfucker. I didn't even know you were going to be there. I'm like, this motherfucker. Yep, you're like, Jedi's gone.
01:51:24
Speaker
Jedi's gone, so I'm going to show up. Whatever. And then radio silence from you on the show after that. Wow. Boom.
01:51:34
Speaker
Mic drop. Yeah. yeah but how many know You know what? Glick likes to bend over real deep so he can pick it up while he's down there. but you know what but you know what But you know what? I've been on quite a bit lately.
01:51:49
Speaker
You have been more. i I even did an after party with you. you i even i was even having I was even on TikTok acting a damn fool. and then i was like And then I got yelled at because, like, yo, Lazy and Shaman are on. I was like, what the fuck? Why didn't I get another notification?
01:52:06
Speaker
And I stopped what I was doing and jumped up in that show. And even though I got left in the backyard, like I wasn't a anybody of any importance. And then you wanted to do an after show. And and I was told, hey, yo, Jedi's doing it an after party.
01:52:20
Speaker
And he wants us to come up. I'm like, I got him. And then you left me in the backyard again. No, that doesn't even make sense. Yeah, you just left me. Oh, that wasn't that up. My fucking mouse died, so I can't even click do anything. Click it, say. Shut up, Paul.
01:52:35
Speaker
click yeah do anything we could say shut up for He wasn't complaining last time I got the hiccups.
01:52:49
Speaker
a Yeah, yeah, yeah. Scott is not the only gay one. Never mind. Glick's coming out loud and proud, bro.
01:53:00
Speaker
oh go i am gay I like to double my chances on by-squash-ful.
01:53:13
Speaker
He does some interspecies stuff. No big deal. I do some weird shit. I do some weird shit on the side. Hey, money's money. day He don't discriminate amongst primates, okay? Just because he's a Sasquatch where humans.
01:53:26
Speaker
Discriminate against primates. That fucking rhymes and I fucking love that. Yeah, he did it on purpose. I know. Lazy Jedi's like, he's a fucking champion.
01:53:38
Speaker
He's a poet and he didn't even know it, Brit. No, he fucking knows it. He's a fucking champion. Those hashtags are like...
01:53:47
Speaker
and and Lazy Jedi is a... Here, I'll do this
Playful Insults and Camaraderie
01:53:51
Speaker
for you. There we go. see See, Britney rewards everything I do with that.
01:54:02
Speaker
I'm sorry. I love you. You're the best, Brett.
01:54:08
Speaker
What did you give us to? Glick's just fucking here, you know? yeah I'm just here. You just touch this pose whenever it suits his purposes. 20 bucks is 20 bucks at the end of the day.
01:54:22
Speaker
What are you guys doing? Num, num, num, num, num. Num, num, num goes a long way. Num, num, num goes a long way. Yeah, I went to the dentist the other day and he's like, I'm going to numb you up. And then next thing had a I know, num, num, num, num. I'm like, I don't think that's the other thing he's numbing.
01:54:47
Speaker
And then he gave you a protein shot. Yeah, I gave him a protein shot. and His finger went up. and It was mutual protein shots. I didn't know that Dennis was going to check my prostate. but This
01:55:06
Speaker
Oh, shit, son. Hey, hey, buddy. That was little cold. You could have warned me. Put the dildo attachment at the end of his drill, then you know happens. Hey, a D. Walt action.
01:55:23
Speaker
Andy? I like a Ryobi. Oh, shit, we got Mandy in here. Mandy, you got to get up here and save this pan. Yeah, Mandy, get up in this bitch. what I give up. nobody never I'm never doing a Saturday night show. but Mandy, get your ass up in her. But I like a Ryobi. I see i see i seen this pan. I'll be popping in the last two weeks, and then I come back, and I'm stuck with Brittany and Jen.
01:55:51
Speaker
yeah the best people will i mean let's go we're more yeahs i mean if we can do this all by ourselves i mean i mean i was picking an all-star cast i would definitely my number one overall pick would be britney and jedi yeah they said you could only pick one and i say i make the fucking rules it's glicks world and you bitches are just living in so my number one pick is britney and jedi Hell well i remember i mean andy I think you're saying that because just not good with numbers. You don't know what one means.
01:56:22
Speaker
Shut up. You might be right, but again, it's Glicks World and you fuckers are just living it. Wait, one on each hand. That means I can pick one for each hand. Yeah, I got the one.
01:56:34
Speaker
And it makes a big one so I can pick two. Yeah.
01:56:40
Speaker
Hi, Mandy. How are you doing, love? I love you. Is that the signal that we're going dock later, Jedi? I mean, maybe. If you see it up in the sky like the bat signal, you know it's not like Dr. Kong. I know it's up. No, we're not. we're having it we're having We're having a pre-show meeting before we go on to Lazy Glicks.
01:57:00
Speaker
Jedi. You guys are not so cool now. And you know what? Yeah, dude. Totally, dude. yeah mean tell it What's up? Okay. Mandy's already regretting coming up. She's like, okay. what Oh, wait, my smoke detector is going off. I got to leave by. That's why I took a moment to bring her in here because y'all were just doing your little...
01:57:25
Speaker
No! Don't you put that on! Don't la better you that You hear jealousy dripping from her voice. Yes. Jealousy. Okay, I got you back, Britt. She's not dripping from her. I was like, fuck this. I'm done listening to this, dude.
01:57:42
Speaker
Shut up, Brittany. You're controlling the back door tonight. You let people in. How much do we have to pay her for that? wait how many um should we have to pray her for that I don't pay her. No, they they don't pay me shit. Oh, she loves the back door, so you don't have to pay her anything.
01:58:00
Speaker
Yeah, Brittany loves the back door, dude. I'm regretting bringing you in here, you little bitch. but yeah so to get You to target.
01:58:15
Speaker
do miss yes
01:58:20
Speaker
That's my older sister. That's my older sister. Brittany, dude. Gatto's doing some marketing for us, okay?
01:58:31
Speaker
She'll call it Glazy Lick after show. That is kind funny. that is kind of fun if we do If we do it after show, Yeah. awake
01:58:49
Speaker
ah do yeah just want to do it I just want to do a one-off show with you and we call it the Glazy Lick. um talking Just don't ask Jedha what he does with his sword in the after hours. Oh, you got a picture to find out.
01:59:07
Speaker
You are a sister, shirt and you're not bugged by hearing this? Like, are you fucking kidding me? She's not my real sister. She adopted me. She found me. And then she was like, ah you're my brother. No. Is that really? I regret almost every day.
01:59:27
Speaker
ah I love how she says it so sweetly, too. I regret it every day. Bless your heart, Glick. Go back to the wilderness where you kind of belong. Brittany, there's somebody knocking at your back door.
01:59:41
Speaker
They would like to come in. Knock, knock, knock. Knock, knock in real life on the down below. Jesus Christ. What's happened? What? You said what? What?
01:59:54
Speaker
what's happened quite we said hot the oh my god britney i got it know oh shouting oh this this motherfucker this guy um yeah i came i came for the request i came for the request what's up what's up yeah yeah who's requesting
02:00:23
Speaker
It's long distance dedication. From Florida to Ohio, from Shaman to Glick. It's a little bit of, when I think about you, I touch myself. Hey, that's a good song. Every time I hear it, I want to watch Austin Powers.
02:00:45
Speaker
the and kind Anytime I hear that, I touch myself. That makes sense. It's more of an instructional song. Yeah. um like I full-on prison-grate myself when I hear that song.
02:01:01
Speaker
That's too far. I slap myself in the face. I call myself a dirty whore. Dude. Oh, Shaman, you're going to love this. Shaman's fucking me up because I keep thinking that Yeah, I know. but it's The picture is shocking me, not man. You know what really fucks me up? When I go on certain panels and like that but like everybody's PFP is a picture of me as Shrek or a fucking cowboy or as something else.
02:01:30
Speaker
I've literally been panels where it's full panel, everybody goes PF like that. And it's, yep, yep, yep. I've been on panels where it's nothing but fucking Shreks of me. We should do that at the same time. We did that at the same exact time.
02:01:49
Speaker
See what I'm saying here? Don't worry, Jenna. I will never do that to babe. Thank you, Mandy. You're the best. I love Mandy. I love Mandy. Not only because she's the funniest person I've ever met, but she's just awesome. God, if I'm the funniest person you've ever met, you've lit a tragic life. Lazy's the biggest liar I've ever met.
02:02:14
Speaker
Oh, wow. There's a lot of bad stuff going on here. We are having a ball. Damn it, Scotto. Damn it. Scotto is the fucking mastermind behind my mental torment. He is the mastermind behind my mental torment.
02:02:30
Speaker
I just want to know why Scotto hates me so much and he won't come up on panel. And I also want to know, how do I get the PFP treatment? I just want to be i just wanna be a part of the toolkit. Scotto, I have a request for a PFP.
02:02:47
Speaker
Can you make one that actually makes me look good? but Something that makes me look good. He's not a magician. I know, but I want him. He kind of is, though. he kind He's not a musician.
02:03:01
Speaker
He's not a musician. What was that clip with that chick talking? Yeah, that's what I was thinking about. no I'm not a magician. Yeah, you are a musician.
02:03:13
Speaker
very Like, I don't do magic. signal I said you're a musician. Like, I don't even know what that means. jedi Jedi is a magician. You should see him make a disappear cock.
02:03:24
Speaker
Or a cock disappear. Wow. It's weird to be dyslexic and gay, isn't it? Yeah. I don't know.
02:03:35
Speaker
yeah i don't ever shows up like that yeah i don't know it's good but no so like be like yeah you got make me a completely white square i would love that thank you it's the only way that would work and i i accept that just make a square that's white and send it to the scottos Or a plain donut, because that's his butt hole.
02:04:04
Speaker
Trust me, his butt hole does look like a plain donut. Wait, what? My butt hole's square and white? It's like on Minecraft? You you your want some photos? like you ah is that your Is that your subtle way of asking for photos of Luke?
02:04:20
Speaker
Surprise! Here's my dick! Surprise, bitch. Wow, how'd you zoom in like that, Glick? Surprise, motherfucker.
02:04:31
Speaker
but but Honestly, he's not
02:04:36
Speaker
seven flat it's sorry i'm gonna be honest
02:04:42
Speaker
but asking um want to re remind that back and not say briney you girl got touched up um i'm gonna be honest Both of you are saying the most weird fucking dyslexic shit I've ever heard in my life tonight. This is the tag team champions here. Right? Turrets is contagious.
02:05:11
Speaker
You have- Brittany, Britt, Britt, Britt, we need you to come to Ohio again and and and we'll get a picture with with you and I since the Jedi just called us the tag team champs.
02:05:22
Speaker
We'll get pictures with you and I holding the belts together. So calm down, it'll be me like twitching. And i promise you're going to be holding the belts upside down because you're all fucked up.
02:05:34
Speaker
I hate to bring it to you, but I'm pretty sure the belt is bigger than Brittany. so So I could literally hold the belt up and she could hide behind it. you wouldn't even know she was there. i could just take a picture holding the belt up like this and say that Brittany is here.
02:05:49
Speaker
Yeah. Yeah. Thanks for that. Oh, no, I'm man. yeah earlier Kind of like earlier earlier when you're just like, there's me. Oh, sweet and Danny and sweet and blah, blah, blah.
02:06:06
Speaker
And then there's just walks in like Hulk smash.
02:06:16
Speaker
Sasquatch smash. That's basically what it was. Like, literally. I'm like, what the fuck are you wearing? Ty, Spork. Why are you so goddamn small?
02:06:28
Speaker
Why are you so goddamn big? Oh, touche. Touche. I was born that way. I don't like saying that.
02:06:39
Speaker
You shot me for having my back, bro. I was born this way, bitch. Maybe it was Maybelline. Maybe. Are you a cover girl, Shaman?
02:06:52
Speaker
ah you a cover girl chairman
02:06:57
Speaker
Maybe. Maybe. maybe
Shared Humor and Experiences
02:07:00
Speaker
paperly Maybe. Maybe um they believe me she like yeah probably believe a million and this just bought visit
02:07:15
Speaker
that kind that was kind of the sexy Is it weird that I have an app owner right now? Yeah. Rick had to put it back in his waistband again. just got it out there. Now he's got to put it back. Stop staring at me.
02:07:27
Speaker
We already had this conversation. It's weird, bro. It's weird. it's back It's becoming interesting. and might have to go off the screen for a second.
02:07:43
Speaker
Where's my fucking chapstick? Blah. Where's the chapstick? I'm here, see that video? Brittany's looking for a chapstick, okay.
02:07:55
Speaker
She made a song of it, that was amazing. We just let Brittany Brittany. We just let Brittany Brittany. Yeah, you gotta let Brittany Brittany. I love that. Brittany Brittany is the like focal point of the show. I think it better than Brittany Brittany.
02:08:13
Speaker
that actually should be smart Oh my time being here? No, it's pretty par for the course. Yeah. Mandy's been around for time. being here yeah i do like it's pretty par for the course yeah yeah i'm sorry i never know no mindy mindy's been around for yeah a long Yeah, I know that but I'm just saying if you've never heard Brittany snort then you it must be your first time here yeah all yeah wearing her smart Over idiot fantasy football
02:08:51
Speaker
what um sport but time sh how is the football going for you glick i am three and one fantasy football Tune in tomorrow, MK, and ask me that question. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Hey, you an early birthday? Oh, is MK here? What up, MK?
02:09:12
Speaker
MK in the building. Oh, that's a really... That's a happy blanket. And it's from... No, I'm... Ah, there he is. There he is. My favorite.
02:09:27
Speaker
I actually love that blanket. That's fucking awesome, Brittany. That's pretty cool. It is by far... Brittany is by far the worst door person of all time. You know what happened? That is pretty bad.
02:09:41
Speaker
Hey, hey. You're the worst door person of all time. I've had to let our last three guests go. Oh, dude, because I was trying to show my fucking... What's up, you slores? sex You son of a bitch. Sucking Jersey. dog Mo dog.
02:10:00
Speaker
Shaman. Brittany. How you doing? How you doing? What's up, baby? You're like a little Georgia peach.
02:10:12
Speaker
Cheers, Brittany. Yeah, cheers, bitch. What'd you take by my mama? this what you
02:10:21
Speaker
I was out driving my new, uh, my brand new dyslorian around. yeah back Did you go back to the future? I did. Did you go back in time? When you get there, tell Megan to shut the fuck up. I drove it 181 miles. Okay. So I gotta, I gotta, gotta give, gotta give all the love in the world because don't have, I don't, I don't have it in me to just be an asshole.
02:10:51
Speaker
to Megan. and the what I spent like two hours doing that last night on the stream. yeah and it it was like yeah but and me knew that me i'm Yeah, was like... I'm not calling out. I'm giving you all the love in the world for this because the one night she was up here and, God, I just wanted her to fucking go away and Brittany was like, bye, bitch. Bye. I told Brittany, I said, from now on, you have 100% control of guests when they come up. If they don't come up, if they're allowed to stay, whatever happens, happens.
02:11:32
Speaker
Because she fucking... And she's done it four times since. And it's funny because she'll drop her and Megan will sit in the backstage for like an hour and be in the chat.
02:11:46
Speaker
He's like, we're not breaking this up. I don't want to talk too negatively on a person, but yeah, she is very accurate. Brittany, make sure you do that shit when Bradley comes up, alright? That fucking band hammer.
02:12:04
Speaker
but Nah, okay. He's done that. I like Megan, too. I like Megan, too. I do give her a lot. I'm really mean to Megan, but she's mean to me, too, it's fair.
02:12:17
Speaker
So it's like a one-to-one ratio. It's just like she tries to take over the whole motherfucking thing. Yeah, I like Megan. try not to be mean. I like Megan in the chat. I don't like Megan in the chat.
02:12:31
Speaker
and don't like megan page you got Watch your fucking mouth when you talk to someone. Better show that man some goddamn respect.
02:12:41
Speaker
um go He'll bid you over and cure your fucking hiccups. You know, those hiccups were gone before I got on the show.
02:12:50
Speaker
mo i so you notice glick's pickups were gone before i got on the show just wanted to point that out He's like, I didn't even know I had fucking hiccups. Thank you very much, sir. Breathe, Brittany. Breathe. She thinks all the oxygen is running out and she snorts it up all at once.
02:13:12
Speaker
Drain a pool in 12 minutes. God damn. That's not a slow day, bro.
Panel Dynamics and Humor
02:13:21
Speaker
drain drain a pool in twelve minutes got damn twelve that's kind a slow neighbor Oh, look. Her tism's kicking in.
02:13:32
Speaker
Watch out. You know, it is impressive how long she can hold her breath. That's got to be a plus. I don't know, though. She breathes through her ears.
02:13:45
Speaker
she bres their gear
02:13:50
Speaker
this i
02:13:54
Speaker
It's funny because I do have Claude. When he's bending over for the hiccups, he sucks in the oxygen.
02:14:08
Speaker
It's funny to see Glick with the Jedi PFT. I don't think it's funny at all. Anything about that PFP is funny. It's the worst PFPF and you're all dickheads.
02:14:18
Speaker
I'll bring it back. in it a my mine's not You know, he just went to go cry, right?
02:14:30
Speaker
but one a good he went off camera so he could he likes it don't don't buy that Don't buy into this and I'm butthurt about it. He secretly fucking loves it.
02:14:43
Speaker
And then he's going to send me the video later. Yeah. He'd be like, Shaman, I was just over here making content, man. I'm a content creator. I had to add some. I had to add some of own fans for a minute. I just content created all over my keyboard.
02:15:03
Speaker
um i just i just I just want you guys to know Jedi's okay. i comfort him I comforted him. I gave him a brand new butt plug.
02:15:15
Speaker
This one vibrates and it has a tail on it. awesome um So Jedi's feeling good. it white? Does it match his complexion? He prefers the black. he prefers the black i yeah I'll go off screen so I ain't smoking on your panel.
02:15:36
Speaker
No, you can smoke on my panel. What are talking about? This is fucking talk. We can smoke a drink. Yeah, does. What the fuck? Yeah, I feel your spirit.
02:15:51
Speaker
Yeah, you can smoke on the panel, MoDog. Yeah. Yeah, i know. was picking a booger out of my nose, man. You can do those on the panel. Do that on the camera and then show it. I just did it and ate it, man. Bro, you're allowed to pick your nose on camera. Even my boogers taste like purple crayons, man.
02:16:17
Speaker
oh like what yeah I did. I burped him. That way he was he relaxed the sphincter. And then once it was relaxed, mid-burp, I...
02:16:27
Speaker
Slip it in. Yeah, my boyfriend, he picked his nose. It's not, it's it's not, it's, uh... Jedi, you're on fucking panel. Why are you secretly typing in the chat?
02:16:38
Speaker
What the fuck is wrong with you, man? Yeah, know. He's a weirdo. Fucking weirdo. Fucking tarred. What the fuck? do What What are you doing? yes Purple tastes like grapes, Ty.
02:16:50
Speaker
Come on, man. I didn't say that. What? What? Oh, you got the grape flavor? I got foam. Yup. yeah Yup.
02:17:01
Speaker
Yup, bro. Unless I got screwed over. What the fuck, Sean? That's what they issued me in boot camp, man. I'm stuck with it. Hey, Sean, what's your favorite color?
02:17:14
Speaker
Clear. Clear. That's a hue. That's a hue, not a fucking color, man. That's racist. That's racist. I don't see color.
02:17:29
Speaker
I don't see color. I'm colorblind. Brittany, are you paying attention to the chat? I think somebody needs to be backstage. Just saying. Okay, wait. Just saying. Wait. He's backstage. um but and inspect oh Jedi said he's going to go hang down and chat because it's cooler.
02:17:48
Speaker
It's cooler down there. wow Wow. It's poo down there because all the hot people are up on stage right now. That's right. yeah gives me Shut up the fuck. Shut the fuck up, Shaman. You don't even show your face.
02:18:05
Speaker
And it's still hot. and a bit He's not allowed. It's part of the witness protection. Shaman is too sexy to show his face. yeah Yeah, I'm in Jehovah Witness Protection Program.
02:18:18
Speaker
Nah, bullshit. I don't believe it. All right, Britt, let him back up. You know going start crying. He's going to get all bent out of shape and shit. I got done crying, and now Brittany made me cry again.
02:18:29
Speaker
yeah Don't worry, Jenna. I got you, sweet Jenna. Way to be on that guy. He's going to send me that video later, too. Oh, damn. Okay, Brittany, I'm done with you. Come to pop a glick.
02:18:42
Speaker
so Come to pop a glick, sweet Jenna. Come to pop a glick, sweet Jenna. I got you. Come Just like ah just like ah Journey just like je said, open arms.
02:18:53
Speaker
Dude, would like Jedi. Open arms, tight thighs. Lazy Jedi would just have a little teddy bear in your arms. just like slowly Most not everybody most everybody is a tiny little teddy bear in my arms yeah When I need a alone time, I just climb into his beard. I wouldn't be, and I don't want to find out. Close the shutters. Nah, his beard doesn't look that great. Oh, yeah yeah. We don't want to find out. Like, we haven't had our moments.
02:19:22
Speaker
Shut up, fucker. Shut up, man. Shut the fuck up, man. Oh, yeah. Shit. Jersey's here. Oh, forgot. Damn it. Oh, boy. He didn't say nothing. He didn't say nothing, Jersey. We'll just edit that part out. Edit it out. Edit it out.
02:19:37
Speaker
i don't know i don't know La la la, nobody heard anything. Dude, dude, it didn't even happen. to Dude, dude. Hey, Shauna. What'd you talk about, dude?
02:19:48
Speaker
What's up? I'm surprised she didn't put that. Dude, it doesn't even look like it. I'm surprised she didn't put that touching tips icon in there. Why don't you come say it to my face?
02:19:59
Speaker
Bitch, bitch. Bitch, bitch. We hold each other. we hold each other and eat purple crowns and cry over our terrible NFL teams, all right? Jersey, leave us alone. Scotto said he's going to come on, Papa Glick.
02:20:14
Speaker
There you are. new That's why he's got the streaks in his beard. got oh Because of Scotto. That's why Scotto won't show us. Those are the Scotto streaks.
02:20:27
Speaker
They're national landmark. It makes us feel better about our shitty NFL team's jersey. Don't judge us. sort of ti sport a fucking man brother so but it's
02:20:50
Speaker
yall are crazy i love you it's an ohio football team thing man okay we have to endure the fucking pain every season duky was that No, that was Penn State. That's in Pennsylvania.
02:21:05
Speaker
i Ohio played today, right? Was that yesterday? They're playing right now. 21-3. They're up on Minnesota. Minnesota. Oh, shit. Jedi's like, fuck sports ball. Fuck this ball.
02:21:19
Speaker
oh shit gave a shit about so vi upset right now jedi is like fuck sports ball fuck this yeah I don't like sports, but I like the boys in the tight, tight pants. I'll be your towel boy.
02:21:34
Speaker
the Okay. Okay. I hate baseball. I hate baseball because it's boring. It's boring as fuck.
02:21:45
Speaker
Unless you're actually watching it on TV. It's boring as fuck. But those hot ones, the banana dudes that like shake their booties and shit like that. Yeah, fuck yeah. I'm about that.
02:21:58
Speaker
ah yeah i Fuck yeah. that boy baby like brand some shit like Fuck yeah, They got one, but it's a community college.
02:22:09
Speaker
Okay. I'll take it. Yeah, well, the whole community can get it, so. Yeah, you know what? Community is the most important thing. Community. Taking care of the community is important.
02:22:23
Speaker
For sure, right?
02:22:26
Speaker
Man, I'm watching Colorado and TCU. don't give fuck to that. and So tomorrow's the Ravens and Chargers. Oh, that's so Raven.
02:22:39
Speaker
Raven. She's less, man.
02:22:45
Speaker
I mean, that doesn't surprise me. and Whatever. I don't care either way. But yeah. Ravens. Let's go. you got a shot for me. That's so Raven I did I used to have watch that show It's the future I can see That's my shit i That was like one of the shows my dad would let me watch because like PG-13 things were like blocked so I could watch That's so Raven It was the only show with would black people allowed to watch No, either that or I Hate Chris
02:23:25
Speaker
Every time I'm starting space out, Brittany does her thing, and then I'm back in the action. Thank you. Let's get it. Get it. Get it. Get it. Get Get it. Get it. Get it.
02:23:36
Speaker
Everybody shut up while she does that. Okay. Yeah, watch Glick. He does not know how to do it. He's trying to do it at the wedding. He's like...
02:23:49
Speaker
Luke has cerebral palsy.
02:23:55
Speaker
a yeah Too far, bro. Too far. You realize now all the all the viewers with cerebral palsy have just unsubscribed to you now.
02:24:05
Speaker
Well, they will. They can actually click properly. All three of them. No, we're going to get so many more followers. It's going to take 20 minutes to hit the right button. They're going to do it, my friend. I'm just like you.
02:24:18
Speaker
I'll have it, too. My mouth fucking sucks. Flick is bringing people together. I'm bragging. bring together remember that perhaps so cre Who's got the zoo in the background? It was a spider monkey. I definitely heard a spider. That was me. Everybody shut up. thank That's the bird.
02:24:46
Speaker
mooc That's you. It's not me. Do you think I can get my fucking voice that high? Come on.
02:24:54
Speaker
Hey, you sound like you got range, man. You sound like you got range. I'm just thinking about like one
Anatomy Jokes
02:25:01
Speaker
of the opening scenes of Ventura where he like jiggles his keys so all the animals go in hiding when his landlord checks on his apartment. And then he does the thing and they all come out again.
02:25:11
Speaker
I feel like there was some signaling going on.
02:25:17
Speaker
Rally up my fucking animals. Let's go. wonderglick twin mate in the form of oh i have hiccups
02:25:33
Speaker
in the form of ah i'm going we want yeah look at me i up i have hiccups
02:25:46
Speaker
please do not bring that yeah Hold on, i'm coming but I'm coming. What up, Mandy?
02:26:02
Speaker
Mandy's giving a second chance. Do it again, Jedi. Do it again. Was that awkward for show and tell when you did that? I didn't think y'all wanted to hear that. tell Tell us. Tell us. tell Oh, no. I mean i didn't think you wanted to hear me throwing up. oh yeah. No, no. I mean, why not? just throw What are you throwing up for? What's wrong with you? Why did why do you just make assumptions?
02:26:28
Speaker
like yeah I mean, you don't know. Yeah, i yeah no. No, I'm okay. I've just been dealing with a migraine today. I have a sister-in-law that I
02:26:43
Speaker
tolerate and she has this friend that every time she comes over she wears enough perfume for about six people and it's triggered a migraine oh come on don't act like you don't know people that wear too much perfume or cologne well i mean since since we all missed it i mean here we go hate no um drop you off and a don't keep fucking do that yeah please don't do that done shit fucking around and actually made yourself throw up no i've done that before trying to be all fucking funny yeah as then then you got a little throw up in your mouth know
02:27:33
Speaker
oh shit okay let's do it subject it's not It's not the worst thing shaman has in his mouth on oh mouth. Oh, there was a mental I didn't need. Hey, okay, Mandy, if you picture shaman, how do you think he probably looks?
02:28:01
Speaker
guessing it no no wrong answers no no offense taken okay
02:28:11
Speaker
i'm curious because i have have actually seen him you've not seen shaman i've seen you i've seen you one time didn't shut those curtains tight enough, did you, Shaman? Whoa, Shaman. I thought, you know, that's why now I put the towels over my security cameras on the inside whenever I mess it up. That'll learn you. That'll learn you. Shaman, what you guys don't know about Shaman is... When, it was a couple weeks he actually showed... What you guys don't know about Shaman? I don't think you guys were lying. Shaman is...
02:28:47
Speaker
Shaman is 3.3 and a half feet tall. child He has one arm. Four legs. He has three actual legs, but then he has a bonus leg.
02:29:02
Speaker
It could be because he's a midget that he has a bonus leg. It's probably not that big, but because he's extra small. It looks bigger than small hands. Yeah, yeah, yeah. We'll just call it a kickstand.
02:29:16
Speaker
yeah and and he's up i yeah any any he And he has an overbite and a weird afro. And he has no gag reflex. Don't ask me how I know about the gag reflex.
02:29:31
Speaker
And a serious hiccup problem. he's He's always bending over to get rid of it. Talk about big bonus legs and here I am, baby. There he is. There he is. Look at that. Look, it's Yippee-Ki-Yay, Scotto. Oh, damn it, Scotto. Damn it. Yippee-Ki-Yay. Jedi went from fucking here to here instantly. was like, Scotto.
02:30:01
Speaker
Yay, Scotto. Literally, Scotto.
02:30:06
Speaker
And now all of a sudden Lazy has the hiccups. yeah Yeah. I'm going to bend over if you want to help cure him later. thank you bray It's not the hind lick maneuver, but it's close.
02:30:18
Speaker
It's close. It's the hind lick maneuver. Lazy has stage four hiccups. stage four there you guys keep talking about hiccup someone else fuck What up, Scotto, you have sexy bitch?
02:30:33
Speaker
Yes, you beautiful queen. Let me see the nails. Let me see the nails, girl. Give me the nails. yeah um i'm breaking them on I'm bringing them them up.
02:30:44
Speaker
I'm bringing them up. Bring them up. yeah know I like holographic silver. I love it. Look at you. I put your nails down. Let me see that. beautiful There it is.
02:30:56
Speaker
Look at you. You're beautiful. Stand up and drop them. Bend over to the front touch your toes. There's my shadow. yeah wi kindta Lick it up and down just like Glick knows. Yeah, let me let me see that pig be wiggly a little bit. know you mass feel like it' andty yes and i'm On the back of the shirt, it says I'm big for the pig.
02:31:25
Speaker
yeah he said he said the tail ain't the only thing that's squiggly britney say i know that He said he'll pork you later. My birthday is in two days.
02:31:40
Speaker
Very nice shade of purple, Brittany. I love those. Very nice shade of purple. you should get Why didn't you give yourself the full screen, Brittany? It's not worth it. Have you seen it, fam? Awww. Awww. Awww. Awww
02:31:56
Speaker
you're totally yeah you know man dude today Dude, bro, you're totally worth it. just Have you seen the family feed clip? What's that host name, Steve? ah what's the Harvey. Steve Harvey. yeah He asked the black panel guest, what's something what's another word that goes with pine?
02:32:17
Speaker
And the guy says, pork you. Yeah. Oh, my God. It's what goes with pork, and he says, you pine. Oh, yeah that's yeah, I got it backwards. You're right. You're the fourth dyslexic person on this panel.
02:32:35
Speaker
so Yeah, see how he's going, but it takes him a second, and he's like, yeah. He's bald. He said, you pine. He said, this dumbass said you pine. There's nothing wrong with bald people. Oh, my God.
02:32:49
Speaker
I like it when the old ladies give the dirty answers. um with With the cutest smile on their face. yeah like that with one yeah Grandma, what's your answer? I like it up the Steve.
02:33:04
Speaker
my favorite one is ah they asked this old lady who was like she looked like she was headed to church. and They said, what's something you like to sit on And she says, my husband's I said,
02:33:32
Speaker
I need to know Jersey. Are you drinking with me or what? yeah Jersey? What are you doing here, Jersey? Come on. Cheers to all you fuckers up here. Cheers everybody in chat. yeah I gotta make a new one in a minute.
02:33:46
Speaker
Cheers.
02:33:49
Speaker
Not the right kind of glass, but whatever. Jersey out there running naked in woods with the fucking Jersey devil and shit.
02:33:58
Speaker
Okay. Don't get me. Don't get me. Make sure you got the moon spraying. No moon burns over there. Well, I'm sober too, babe. I didn't ask if you were sober. I asked if you were drinking with me.
02:34:11
Speaker
There's a difference. Yes, ma'am. Anyways, have y'all ever... oh No. No. Well, twice. Twice. so I go out on nature trails, right?
02:34:27
Speaker
There's this specific spot. i I'm not going to say. And I like to go barefoot. if I like to time myself to see how far I can go, how fast I can go and climb the rocks because there big boulders back there. I have to rock climb. then yeah like How high up is it? like but You got an unfair advantage with your finger toes, man.
02:34:49
Speaker
Yeah, I do. You're not wrong. You're climbing with four hands and shit, man. yeah she did i mean and <unk> spider monkey I need a GoPro. When I think of Scott, I touch myself.
02:35:06
Speaker
You don't need a GoPro. You're a Brit, bro. It's funny to watch Glick go full gay whenever Scott comes on here, man. yeah so i a fuckcker Stand up. Glick, stand a fuck up. I know you got a pink tutu on. Stand the fuck up.
02:35:21
Speaker
and He's still got it tucked into his waistband. Does he have quick tutu on? He saves that for bucking out the closet.
02:35:33
Speaker
He's got his thong on backwards, too. yeah anyway Stand up. but balls squeezing out both sides and shit. My soldier is at full attention because Scotto's here. Shut up.
02:35:48
Speaker
Don't judge me because I love me some Scotto. Hey, we don't kink shame here, man.
02:35:55
Speaker
Scotto just sits back quietly like, yeah, I know. I have that effect. My precious. Scotto just sits over there with the who's your daddy face.
02:36:05
Speaker
ah Take it all in. my you see it Oh, yeah, you take it all in? Oh, hell yeah. Only when she has hiccups.
02:36:16
Speaker
so Mine's better. All the way to the base. All the way to the base. Nobody cares Jersey because you're not on the panel. Can I put my balls in too? good You know what? That would be Shaman too. He'd show his balls before he shows his face. that's hey Legitimate serious thing. The balls are shaved. The face
Playful Secrets and Teasing
02:36:41
Speaker
is not.
02:36:43
Speaker
There's a such thing called a baldo. For real? Real? Does anybody know about this? way Not that we're going to fucking admit.
02:36:57
Speaker
No, no. I've never heard of this. got it Educate us. It's just literal. You put this device thing around your balls and a couple of rings and you can literally fuck somebody with your ball sack. Lord of the Rings.
02:37:13
Speaker
Why? Why would you do that? what I did not make this thing. For men born without a penis? like what What's the point? no goryl Those That's for the minigand. Hold on a damn second. so there's even if My balls are way bigger than my dick.
02:37:30
Speaker
So I can buy a device. All right. Why did we have to wait a second to hear that? My ball side hangs to my knees, so I can make a device where I can fuck somebody. cur dude but well Nobody cares, dude. He's not telling you that he has short thighs, though.
02:37:47
Speaker
He's got really short thighs and long shins. Hey, Glick, I'm not going to say hashtag 60, but hashtag 60, motherfucker.
02:37:56
Speaker
Did anybody else hear Big Daddy in their head with those loose skin and his old balls? I'll say what you're thinking, Moe Dogg. Just wait till you hit 60. You think they're bigger now. Wait till you hit 60, man. You hit 59 and half. You hit 59 and half. Yep.
02:38:16
Speaker
<unk> sixty i you hit fifty nine and a half oh you have to on it sit down now yu I was going to say, my balls already go swimming. If I hit 60, I'm going to eat a wheelbarrow.
02:38:29
Speaker
You just got to lift your ass up when you flush, man. You don't want them get sucked down the fucking hole. Oh, my God. That's all I'm into. striking my life What is my fucking life? and What is my life? I've been sinking a lake jersey.
02:38:45
Speaker
Brittany, if you're just now questioning that. Your balls hasn't hit maturity until you start telling the temperature and the time. I still remember the first time I sat on a nut while I was in the car. I was sitting down on the couch the other night, about two weeks i still remember the first time i sat on a note while i was in the car watch the dad sit down on a couch the other night about two weeks ago when i'd said down um i've Cried like a fucking virgin on prom night. They don't wake you the fuck up. yeah you know you You know what? You you want to know what really fucking sucks?
02:39:18
Speaker
I can't even sleep on my side anymore because if I sleep on my side too long, I crush my sack and then I wake up and it's like... yeah No, seriously. I'm not... know he can like something a bad hair so um I know exactly what he's talking about.
02:39:33
Speaker
You got to lay down on your side. You got to do the hand tuck and pull the shit up before you can lay down properly. yeah because i' squished I mean, I've heard. I read that on the internet somewhere. Perfect. He'll you in. Don't worry. me send you my address.
02:39:56
Speaker
gonna I dropped a link in the back chat. They literally have a YouTube page. They have educational videos. like It's crazy. but there's And if you come using a Baldo, they refer to it as a Balgasm. So and have your first Balgasm. Scotto, if this is your fucking Pornhub link again. It's a legit serious thing.
02:40:19
Speaker
I only know about this because when that lawyer in the crusade got busted um and the police were going to search his house, they had to write in the police report, he has like four or five baldos of various sizes. I'm like, what the fuck is that? I'm allegedly smart.
02:40:34
Speaker
I'm allegedly smart. Scotto, I'm not totally believing that you had to look this shit up to find out what it is. I'm just saying. wow I'm not totally convinced that's all of the fucking truth to the story.
02:40:50
Speaker
while there was Playmore. I could believe you wrote the fucking educational article. I mean... all all i All I know is my night has been made because my Scott, my sweet, sweet Scott.
02:41:03
Speaker
Glick's still got that sweet fucking 16-year-old girl fucking glow on his face and shit, man. ah point That is glow, right? Scotto, is that glow? I don't but don't know. yeah He's going around.
02:41:16
Speaker
That's my semen on his face. well i was You're in the Navy now, Glick. You're in the Navy. The Glick and Amy have happened. You can sell the seven seas in the Navy. I like calling it a semen cemetery because once semen hits the air, you know they're technically dead. so It's a semen cemetery. You call your face a semen cemetery? land Just merge the words together and call it a semen cemetery. Cemetery. Yeah, cemetery. Let's turn it into a real come back home, man.
02:41:55
Speaker
let's turn into a real comacle man don't know i a hi just like with i' hanging in are y'all but I wonder how many words we've created on this network in the last three months. oh We could probably come up with like a Glick dictionary, man.
02:42:13
Speaker
Glick dictionary. You should come up with a word to express how many words you've come up with. Fuck all y'all.
02:42:24
Speaker
The Glictionary already thing, Brittany. You're going to have to deal with it. We already have words in the Glictionary.
02:42:35
Speaker
If the Glictionary is pop-up book, I will buy a copy. ah that I will make a special copy just for you, Scotto. When you read it, something will pop up.
02:42:46
Speaker
It'll be a quick read, Scotto. Anything you want, girl. Just watch out for the sticky pages. Yeah. You got to read the small print. yeah Anything my Scotto wants, my Scotto gets. more i don't know I will see you lovely people later. have a fun
02:43:10
Speaker
have left take care of and So you'll appreciate it. I'm at this age where like I will read something that has small print. I'm like, what the fuck is this? And I have to actually get my phone and zoom in and take a picture. yeah and ask me yeah Trust me. It's small print.
02:43:27
Speaker
We'll call it small print. so You're going to have to zoom in. Scotto, you're not far away from them 60-year-old balls, dude. telling you. and I'm 32 in two days. You've got to put the chain on the door. Turn that on. A whole fucking 32, Brittany?
02:43:43
Speaker
Do you? so think somebody Oh, you're so old. Put the chain on the door. This fucking shirt's 28 years old. What the fuck, man? I got jeans in my closet that are older than Brittany.
02:44:00
Speaker
I actually have clothes older than her. No doubt. i Seriously, I do too, MoDog. Yeah, I do. Yeah, look right there. scott Right where he belongs.
02:44:12
Speaker
um Right below My sweet little bottom. Oh, look at that. A little power bottom. little power bottom that you are. Yeah, yeah. Well, shaman, enjoy, buddy. Let let us know.
02:44:30
Speaker
Jedi got all jealous and left and went in bed. Yeah, what the fuck did I? He's all texting me at work. Come on. Come on and on. Dude, Shaman, don't act like you're not my boy, Shaman. mean, yeah, but... See, Rock wasn't here. He had to be convinced to come up.
02:44:46
Speaker
don't act like you're not my boy shaman i mean yeah but yeah but but you' so sex hu and i you adulty see rock rock wasn't here he had to be convinced to come up and i think
02:45:04
Speaker
like said that that that fucking That fucking got sent to me. i got a screenshot of the of the panel last weekend and lost my fucking mind. And I was like, oh my god. but Send it to me.
02:45:20
Speaker
Door closes and then flaps. i think the best part is off of that panel like it finishes and i think jedi goes to watch it the next day and the picture of all of us is jedi was the thumbnail nice all right i'll be back i'll be white here you'll be white
02:45:42
Speaker
you'll be white share movie but
02:45:49
Speaker
It looks like one of those ninety s cream sickle. Yeah, why does... Look, I didn't want to say anything, but why does Sarge look like an orange cream sickle to me? He does. He's an orange sickle. An orange cream sickle that somebody took a bite out of.
02:46:04
Speaker
Yeah, that's exactly what he looks like. cause he's got that He's got all the gray hair. I'm so jealous. I wish my beard would go all gray. Yeah, I wish. What? Yeah, I see you, Skata.
02:46:16
Speaker
I'm like three-fourths of the way there. I just don't know. No, no, no, no, no. Actually, okay. it's like I just fucking hate you, but I love you, and I will say your beard did look pretty dope, even though you're done.
02:46:29
Speaker
You got to see it in person, and you're like, You make fun of me for dying my beard. and You're like, wow, he really doesn't dye his beard. because no i said oh you No, it gave me further proof that you do dye your beard.
02:46:41
Speaker
No, it gave me further proof that I have the most amazing beard on the planet. No, it was dope. It was a little dry. Just appreciate it. No, it wasn't. No, it wasn't.
02:46:54
Speaker
I oiled it up. I lotioned it up. I know i had beard but i did i have oil and beard balls. I know. i used youre smoke because You did yeah smell good. smell good. i love that. that's that's That's the quality. Look, men.
02:47:08
Speaker
look man You don't have to be impressing nobody.
02:47:13
Speaker
What the fuck? Who the fuck is that? um that's That's me. That's for you. no heard about your beard. When it comes to beard care, I will say as a female, yeah I appreciate that fucking shit. Guys, if you got a beard, if you got a beard take care of Take care of that fucking it up yeah that's what That's what's funny about ah you know you think a lot of people would think, oh, you get a beard, you know you're all ah only being just manly and i don't have to take care of myself. now you got to do extra stuff. It's extra work for sure. so i Not only do I have a beard,
02:47:49
Speaker
You gotta trim it right. You gotta trim it right. Yeah, you gotta condition that shit. yeah And I don't look like a creamsicle motherfucker. I look like Golden Hour. Get the shit right.
02:48:02
Speaker
Ooh, Jersey shit. I mean, at least the creamsicles taste you.
Future Plans and Fast Drives
02:48:06
Speaker
They're not coming in hot. Have you guys actually got to meet in person yet? Have you guys got to hang out person yet? Yeah, they have a picture together. Yeah. Don't you start to shut up, Glick. God damn it.
02:48:21
Speaker
just hope that everybody knows that I nothing but love for Jersey and MoDog. It's happening. yeah I don't believe you, bro.
02:48:32
Speaker
i got nothing but love for jersey and modol yeah jersey my dog it's happening i don't i don't believe we bro it believe jersey but theres how much of yeah Jersey knows how much I love her.
02:48:45
Speaker
Yeah, it's happening soon. I think I'm going to up there and catch the all the pretty New Jersey colors of leaves in the trees and shit. i you're gonna be near me not before im ah um but hang out to look out Look out your window, Brittany, at the highway, and I'll be that car going like 140 mile an hour past your fucking house, dude.
02:49:02
Speaker
yeah outrage you feeling take me all not break you let's go but Wait I to go to... so wait a minute but i from kentucky would i come through pennsylvania to go ah to Jersey. now you can You can come wherever you want.
02:49:20
Speaker
That's where I do. right Where are you at? I'm in Annapolis currently. Oh, you are? Okay. yeah you know what You know what? I was going to say Jersey, I was going to hang out with MoDog before you, but the Browns and Bengals don't embarrass each other.
02:49:36
Speaker
Yeah. That be a cry man.
02:49:40
Speaker
that would be a cry that'd be a cry first man What the fuck is this? We can hang out together. and January fourth 2026 because that is the last game of the season apparently. Yeah, well. Do you have to make a request for that?
02:49:58
Speaker
The Bengals season's already fucking over, dude. I've already gave up on them.
Bengals' Season Jokes
02:50:02
Speaker
I have. I'm like, fuck them. we were We were in week one of preseason and I was already going, well, there's already negative. Even though the Browns are 3-0 in preseason, it's a rebuilding year, know?
02:50:15
Speaker
That's what Joe Burrow's niece said. Motherfuckers. Yeah, it's like he gets hurt and team says, oh shit, we forgot how to play as a team and win. you forgot how to play that Your offensive line has never figured out in in seven years how to block that kid.
02:50:32
Speaker
I know. I know. It's the brand just question Bring up what I dropped in the back. It's about your beard. No. You guys got a wonderful beard. I love to come on it. I love to come on it. It's calm catcher. Are those real sites?
02:50:54
Speaker
Scruff and Growler? Yeah, they're male hookup sites. There's a couple of videos where these female actors take all these messages that men sent and read them as women in their fucking letters. I mean, they're graphic, but they're funny.
02:51:10
Speaker
Hell yeah. that It's a cum catcher. I always, oh my God. it is can Can you say cum catcher and semen cemetery in the same fucking breath? I mean, if you take a deep breath before you start speaking, that sounds like this year's new Halloween, scary movie, man.
02:51:30
Speaker
Thank you, Brittany. I just, I just, I just want to, I just want to say, ladies, um, if, uh, you happen to have a built-in water park, these are great for that.
Beard Humor
02:51:45
Speaker
Yeah, you got a sponge growing off your face. No. You're goddamn right I do. Crumb catcher. It's the crumb catcher saver. If you are a super soaker 3000, you're a super soaker 3000. Britt, you might need to wash that thing a little bit more often, man. If you're fucking spitting out crumbs and shit, man.
02:52:07
Speaker
that just saying ah Chris, your facial hair is crab catcher. Crab catcher. Crab catcher. Are you a longshoreman? No, I just take this girl named Brittany.
02:52:25
Speaker
yeah much but i was I was a masturbator at one point. I've never given it up. no okay start walking get his dog
02:52:46
Speaker
yeah start walking get his dog creek around or that approval function that's his dog i thought it was him so term the means self work i thought it That's how he sounds when he laughs.
02:53:05
Speaker
looking at my right problem no that's the biggest sound of chihua i've ever fucking heard man was bio she is that she is on stoids mo dog that remind one of my best friends Like we worked doing pressure washing and that our boss bought us a box to watch the flyers. I've pressure washed a few boxes.
02:53:40
Speaker
Yeah, me too. ah pressure washed a box last night. and he's got on Monday.
02:53:52
Speaker
i'm just I'm just distracted that you got hair, Brittany. I've never seen your hair down before. and i wear yeah. but I my hair and back and forth. Yeah, no. But your your boss got you a box.
02:54:05
Speaker
Yeah, he bought us all a box. Wait, box got... You said your boss got in your box? For Flyers and Billy? That's how you get ahead in life, Glick. You didn't know how meic works? Yeah.
02:54:19
Speaker
He bought us a fucking box for us to watch the caps versus the flyers. His girls and flyers fan. I'm a fire fan. and also got the cap fan and they fucking run. I forgot what i was going with that because you guys can't fucking shut up.
02:54:35
Speaker
so okay It's okay, Megan. just Oh. My friend, I fucking hate you. My friend Ricky was like, this is the worst fucking baseball game I've ever seen in my fucking life.
02:54:50
Speaker
And then I just turn and it's hockey.
02:54:55
Speaker
Yeah, fuck shaman hard Brittany
02:54:59
Speaker
basketball game i've ever seen in my life and i i just you go wow that was like i know i was against voice qua all of you fuck call that's gonna take yeah fuck shaing yeah fuck shaman hard britney yeah you never been fuck him or Fuck him until he has a face.
02:55:21
Speaker
Okay? You fuck him so good. Fuck him into existence. Fuck him real good. I hate you guys. i Fuck me till I love you.
02:55:32
Speaker
Fuck him, dude. Fuck him, dude. Yeah, dude. Oh, shit. Poor Brittany. You take so much shit, man.
02:55:43
Speaker
Props to you, girl. Who just deserves to be backstage for those comments? You take as much shit as Scotto's dick, man. boom and Sorry. Sorry, Scotto. That just popped in my head. I'm sorry, man.
02:55:57
Speaker
That was wrong. dicklu Rewind that. My bad. I apologize. that was that My dick pops in your head, MoDog. That was out of line, man. i was that a line That was out of line. just your dick. It's almost like... a thing your dick is crooked if it was not in line hey I love you. I love you, Scotto. I'm just joking. MoDog, we might share purple crayons together, but you leave my sweet Scotto out of this.
02:56:19
Speaker
um but My bad. My bad. You share purple cans of purple-headed yogurt slingers, okay? Yeah, just because we eat crayons and touch tips doesn't mean you you can be mean to my sweet, sweet Scotto.
02:56:34
Speaker
but I do apologize, Scotto. That was funny. Blake and MoDog reinvented the fucking... It was fucking funny, but I still apologize.
02:56:45
Speaker
but It was fucking funny. The key to make it funny, so good job. but at what what what would And What Moe Dogg and Glick does is is is our our secret.
02:56:58
Speaker
All right? Nothing happens between us. You don't always have to be included, man. It's okay. Nothing happens. Jedi said it. Jedi said it. Nothing nothing happens.
02:57:13
Speaker
Nothing happens. Look, Jersey's still here. Nothing happens. Moe Dogg and I are just friends. Just friends. Three tips. Three tips. yeah three tips three tips three three tip Three tips. Three three tips and a brown donut.
02:57:28
Speaker
That's a trident. That's fucking trident. Guess who's who? who That's a trident. I'll trident anything once. who's who? two three Three chips and a plain doublehead. You got to get blindfolded and you got to figure out which trident is who's. It's like the 2025 version of the relationship taste test. well get hilarious Guess who's who? Hey, Ty, you can get a lot weirder than this.
02:58:01
Speaker
It could get worse. She's giving it the claw. but It's the same thing that kid with the epilepsy does, man. it' because that happens perhaps like your Best boyfriend ever.
02:58:18
Speaker
It still seems like cerebral palsy to me, but whatever.
Relationship Banter
02:58:21
Speaker
well Jersey, I'm i'm glad i'm not a i'm not um I'm not a filthy secret, and you already know about Mo Dog and I.
02:58:30
Speaker
Yeah, you're a third wheel, bro. I am a third wheel. I wasn't always a third wheel, and then Jersey came along. Bitch. Bitch. Way to twist that one. Good job. Good save, man. I got the Uno reverse card for everything. Go play with me. It's Glicks World.
02:58:52
Speaker
You sons of bitches are living in it. Modag's going to have to sleep on the couch tonight, even though he doesn't even live with her. I saw her type in the chat about an hour and a half ago that I might be going back to the basement. He's going to sleep on the couch in his own apartment. Right? you went from the Which means downstairs with the spare tire. you typed in chat, babe.
02:59:18
Speaker
yeah i saw what you typed in chatba Sarge might be going back to the basement. I saw this shit. but didn change me Just because I didn't comment on it didn't mean I didn't fucking and see it. do You know what I'm saying? That's why you make the basement the man man's fucking...
02:59:36
Speaker
thrown down there. then when you go to the basement, hell yeah, see you later. When you was in the basement, when you sent me to the basement, that's right. Sometimes kind of nice be banished.
02:59:49
Speaker
It's like, okay, yeah, yeah I'm going to go suffer in the place I like the most. Yeah, I got strippers in my basement. You know what That is not a support Structure or stop pole That's not what that is Do you guys do video chat And then you fall asleep on video chat We have. i love fucking How fucking cute is that? Come on. Cute as fuck. The difference is, Modog and Jersey have been a thing for a while.
03:00:21
Speaker
Quick, you have a new one. yeah yeah like yeah You know, it's it's funny you say that. Bitch, you change girlfriends more than change my boxers, motherfucker. It's funny you say that, Jersey, because Scotto says the same thing to me every weekend.
03:00:37
Speaker
Punish me, daddy. Blake sends me off to the kitchen to make a sandwich and I come back and he's asleep already. Untrackable. Yeah, he's not wrong. that Where are you at, untrackable? Get man. crack?
03:00:54
Speaker
Sasquatch gets very sleepy when they get filled with lust like that. He's so excited and he just falls asleep. He's like a fainting goat. Look. You guys, there's a there's a lot going on behind the scenes in my world that you guys don't know about. behind this And i've been doing and i've been and i've been doing a lot of I've been doing a lot of fuckery and bullshit.
03:01:13
Speaker
But yes, I do have a new girlfriend and we've been talking for a little hot minute. When do we get to meet her? A little hot. I don't know. What's his name? Yeah, it's his name.
03:01:27
Speaker
Scato. Scato. Right here. It's right here. I knew it. I knew it the whole time. It's my girlfriend. It's big for the pig. And guess who the pig is right here.
03:01:39
Speaker
Big pig. it's a bear. He likes bears. I am a bear. Yeah. Yeah. don't know why he just pointed to Jedi. but his bears here be wrong yeah I don't think he was pointed to a Jedi. i think he was just small like, duh.
03:01:56
Speaker
am i or not Am I or am I not a bear in the and the community?
Gay Bar Experiences
03:02:01
Speaker
oh du you'd You'd be Papa Bear in the community if I had to guess. If I had to make an intelligent guess. but know like you You are a big dude. With that hat, he kind of reminds me of Winnie the Pooh.
03:02:12
Speaker
He likes honey. Oh, honey. well you're not gay so no He's a poo bear do we Do we really know that? Do we go know that? Just bring Scotto up on panel and that motherfucker goes full gay, man All you guys know is that I have a new girlfriend You don't know anything about my new girlfriend you do have Did she get her nails done recently?
03:02:36
Speaker
but are they gray? scott didn't get his are they Let's bring them up again. I'm bringing up brand maybe is ask again let's go look at that there's still kind of holograph i love it should just a magnet thing so hallelicic Yes, exactly. yeahmoed Another new word. Add it to the Glictionary.
03:03:11
Speaker
so get up You're in charge of the Glictionary. go on Okay, well, who's in charge of teaching you to read so you can know what's in the Glictionary? That's not important.
03:03:23
Speaker
That's why you gotta draw every word. gotta make hieroglyphics and shit. He said the word dick. He's like, oh, yep, it's out. and yeah It's been in the waistband since Scotto came up here.
03:03:34
Speaker
but That's why it's gonna be a pop-up book. can You fluff your waistband a few times. Shaman, dude, that was good. What'd you say? Sorry, Shaman. What'd you say?
03:03:46
Speaker
Glick's got the stiffest waistband on the fucking panel.
03:03:50
Speaker
It's gonna be pop-up book. Look, I will never hide the fact of how much I love Scotto. I love me some Scotto. I hope one day that and that we are able to meet each other.
03:04:04
Speaker
this boat by my My girlfriend, I will say this, my girlfriend, her nephew is gay. And and and and she was like and she she was like, hey, I hope it's okay.
03:04:16
Speaker
You're going to meet my nephew. He's gay. And I'm like, okay. fucking care i literally have a broster he's like yeah i fucking love gay people i'm kind of gay my damn self man i'm kind of pretty gay myself no i said i i was like i have a broster not only that but and then she's a fan of what we do here she loves our she loves our network just yeah and uh and i was like one of my favorite people in the whole wide world is scotto and he's a gay guy he comes up here and i go full gay every time he comes up And she's like, oh, Lord.
03:04:48
Speaker
that's He actually is always full-gayed just to be prepared for Scott. Is she watching yet? Has she been watching and lurking? She has been watching. She's not currently watching because they are watching. They supporting a friend of theirs who fights in the mixed martial arts world.
03:05:04
Speaker
And he has a fight tonight, but we are chatting as we do the show. But. She will eventually get to see you. I like big balls. Isn't that kind of like Stolen Valor?
03:05:15
Speaker
big balls and I cannot lie. What's Stolen Valor? You know, act acting gay only when he's here. that like Stolen Valley? I mean, oh that's more like he's been doing it the whole time. Lazy laisy and i created a whole ass paid website just out of me acting gay.
03:05:40
Speaker
You think I'm attracted to him? It's called Glaze.com, man. Ew, I hate you. fucking you. It's called Glazy Donuts.
03:05:53
Speaker
No! Breakfast of Champions. christian Fuck you, Wheaties. Breakfast of Champions and Semen Cemetery. Yes, yes there there is cream filling.
03:06:05
Speaker
and Look, I am 100% a straight-ass man, but I'm secure enough in my sexuality that I can flirt with Scott. You can fuck dudes. I can have sex with Scott if I wanted to. I'm so secure. I'm so secure. I can fuck guys and still be straight. I'm so That's exactly what it is.
03:06:26
Speaker
I think he's got that yellow fucking hat. That's how I like you back. Come on. I know. That's what you're saying. A straight guy. Scott O's straight, too. Yeah. yeah yeah click like i'm I'm straight, but my friend that I fucking ass, I think he might be gay.
03:06:43
Speaker
He might be gay. He likes me too much. My boyfriend? I don't know about him. I'm straight, but Scotto's gay. Ty's got a point. It's not gay if it's with Scotto, and I'm pretty sure he has a fucking hoodie that even says that.
03:06:57
Speaker
Yes, I
Identity Humor
03:06:58
Speaker
do. you but that art yeah favor of that how do i get How do I get that hoodie? I need a of that hoodie. so excellent I'll find you before. What? Hey, it's cupping season.
03:07:13
Speaker
It's big boy season. That's all season. It falls right around the corner. it's It's starting to get cold. It's big boy season. I'm just saying. need that. but Watch out for Susan.
03:07:24
Speaker
Glick's like, I'm a saskatch. You want climb my tree? yeah Yeah, you want to climb my cock? I mean tree. I always confuse those two words. Cock and tree. They're they're similar. I don't like it.
03:07:39
Speaker
That must be really weird when you go to state parks. Brittany, I got a question. what What was it like meeting him for the first time at the wedding? What was it like meeting him person? how I will tell you this. i would tell you this i was ah She's going to say some mean shit, I'm to tell you the truth.
03:07:55
Speaker
She gave me the biggest goddamn hug as soon as I got out of my car. She gave me the biggest hug and And I gave her, i wrapped her up. I could have put my arms around her like 17 times. You were gentle. She didn't crush her into oblivion. I was very gentle, so I didn't crush her. But it was was very nice. Before she says something mean, it was very nice to meet Brittany.
03:08:17
Speaker
And it was very nice to talk to her. and And like I said, she gave me the biggest hug in the world. Yeah, okay, whatever. Brittany, how did it go when you first met him, man? Um... um I gave the biggest hug in the world. he brought it yeah He brought a roll of dimes to the wedding in his pocket.
03:08:39
Speaker
he was but they were hard. also so i did give him a hug. i wanted to oh Well, after the hug, I fucking punched him in the arm. did. Did you take the roll of dimes and hold them when you punched them? like the gar or Sometimes, yeah.
03:08:58
Speaker
Did you climb up him?
03:09:01
Speaker
She had to. She's like, ew. Is that cavernous? had to do this weird crouching thing where one knee was here and one knee was higher so she could and to like do this weird like crouching thing where like one knee was here and one knee was higher or she could I got a step stool so she could punch me in the arm.
03:09:18
Speaker
Crouching tiger hidden. Crouching tiger hidden. Crouching tiger hidden. I would look over at him sometimes when we were at the reception. was sitting next to me.
03:09:31
Speaker
We switched our seats so we would be sitting next to each other. and He would be looking at the fucking football game playing. and you turned over he would be looking at the fucking football game playing And I fucking punch him in the fucking leg.
03:09:47
Speaker
And I wouldn't even react because I didn't realize he's like swatting flies off and shit. What was that fly that just hit me? Jesus. Why are there so many flies in this reception? Some fucking gnats in this fucking hall, man. Yeah, no, it was a good time. We had a good time. It was nice meeting him. It was very nice meeting him. What was it like meeting Blaze?
03:10:08
Speaker
I've already met Blaze before yeah the wedding. I've hung out Blaze. Her experience with Blaze and my experience with Blaze are two different experiences. where is it not Elaborate.
03:10:22
Speaker
no no i've i have've I've hung out with Blaze several times. Blaze and I have actually he's actually done two live gigs at an axe throwing place here in town together. We did last Halloween and then before that we did their one year anniversary.
03:10:38
Speaker
um And then Blaze has been here several times. and Michael's been here a few times. Oh, yeah. But and that was the miss different situation, but different, different, go suck a big kind different, different. That's something me and Jersey do. She'll put her little like she'll put her phone on her mount and drive me like around her city and shit and show her.
03:11:00
Speaker
I do the same thing here. had to drive up fucking I had to drive up to Columbus with her on FaceTime and come up, meet you and hang out. Yeah, like he's been to my house twice. Dude, you hung out and we and we chilled.
03:11:15
Speaker
well I know we've exchanged this information, but don't do it on here. Motherfucker, don't ask me again where I live. Because you do every fucking panel. You live and you live in Saskatchewan, I know that.
03:11:27
Speaker
Yeah, yeah, yeah. no i know you're in kentucky you live in
03:11:40
Speaker
yeah i'm like little under two and a half hours away from you so that's nothing oh yeah oh yeah dude we gotta hang out and then we got a facetime jersey at this time i'm going i'm going at the gable well you're in annapolis maryland right now yeah okay why't you well you would be so much closer It would be so much closer if you went to see Jersey than to come here.
03:12:01
Speaker
Well, that's true. It would not be closer. It would be five times farther, but I still like that idea better. yeah Kentucky to Jersey is a lot farther than Kentucky to Columbus, dude. I'm talking about Rick.
03:12:15
Speaker
right oh oh go see jersey you we you and i meet up oh okay gotcha i got you got you each time each other but i want you and jersey to get together i love you i love you too you guys are you guys are kind of gross i will say yeah we are but in a good way they're not gross they're adorable like like a good like you guys they're fucking gross it's like a good version of herpes right dude i I'm saying it in a good way. i like them together. I'm just saying. It's a good version of herpes. It is.
03:12:48
Speaker
yeah I guess. it thats something So without giving out too much too much information, how because I don't have a map pulled up, how close is where you're at currently to New Jersey?
03:13:03
Speaker
ah Depends. Five hours and 34 minutes.
03:13:11
Speaker
ah appreciate it man you all did I just can't picture in my mind where it know where you're at currently. I'm trying to say that without saying where you're at.
Travel and Friendship
03:13:25
Speaker
Like literally 10 minutes. are. Yeah, never mind. I'm stupid.
03:13:28
Speaker
like literally that again ten minutes i mean we had been five hours and thirty four minutes shit we my yeah we are yeah never my i'm stupid Yeah, i'm I'm literally right across.
03:13:39
Speaker
like i i ah third I'm the third exit into fucking Kentucky, man. Oh, I know. you Okay, yeah, We are literally like two hours away from each other. Oh, shit. yeah Yeah.
03:13:53
Speaker
Hey, Shawty. Shawty. Yeah, Shawty. Scotto know what we're going to do when we do meet up? Did you ever hear that story, Scotty?
03:14:05
Speaker
Besides that, I mean. No, Jersey's still here. Jersey's still here. No. of jersey has Jersey has anything to say about it, she'll be sending in the the this. She'll be sending that constantly. That's what I was saying.
03:14:18
Speaker
i know here's you guys He said he's got a cool gay bar up there. We're going meet up for the first time go hang out at a gay bar and get drunk. gay what where you yeah We got to go to Columbus to the gay bar. I've never been one.
03:14:29
Speaker
Glick's got a fucking chair up there with his fucking name stenciled on the back seat of it. Scotto, you know I love you. dude I love going to gay bars. And and as a gay guy.
03:14:42
Speaker
As a gay guy. i got again No, no, no. Listen, listen, listen. Yeah. This is the thing. This is when a straight guy goes into a gay bar, it's a different world, you know, because some, not all, but some are like, that's a straight guy because the gaydar goes off.
03:15:00
Speaker
I have gaydar for a straight guy. I can point out a gay from a mile away. I'm also very, very much straight. But i'm onnna test gay bars are really cool because I never had i ain't never had nobody buy drinks for me in a bar in my entire life.
03:15:15
Speaker
I go into a gay bar. You know who drinks for free all night long? This guy. Also, the bartender will lean across the bar and go, you know they're just trying to get you drunk enough to have sex with you because you're straight i'm like i hope they got big pockets because you like a drink no you can't i don't own any leather though you're gonna you're gonna get drugged one of these days bro but gli up bull it you can't drink because you you're gonna get cosby and uh yeah and fast
03:15:46
Speaker
for a bit I can't drink because what? You fucking drunk so fucking fast. like and Yeah. they did he Is he really a lightweight Brit? he All these cans of Miller Lite we see him drinking are they full water? Yeah, they're full of water.
03:16:03
Speaker
They're already drinking. and i do get drunk fast I do get drunk fast because i ain't no bitch. I'm not over here fucking sipping on beer. Wait, wait. I didn't have that backwards, but go on. I do get drunk fast. I ain't no bitch. Bitches can drink a lot. But I can drink a lot and I can also keep I'm not...
03:16:21
Speaker
but i can ah but can drink a lot and i can also keep my took but your like i'm not I'm just saying, if we go there we end up, both of us getting drunk, we have to be really careful on who we let fucking Uber us home. Yeah, you going to have to have sex each other so nobody else has sex with each other.
03:16:42
Speaker
It's not good if we sex with each other. We're going to have to act like a couple and shit, man. You guys have to dock in front of everybody so nobody tries to tread. Get away from my man, motherfucker. That's how you establish dominance. We're going to walk in straight as hell, but about six, seven, eight beers in, going to have to act like a couple that way. He's skipping out holding hands and shit. I mean, I don't know.
03:17:07
Speaker
i'm just see I don't know the protocol, but whatever. So you just got engaged and you're about to get married and just this and like, yeah. You're going to have to start holding hands and make drink. Yeah, dude, I got a ring I can put on my finger and everything. I'll be like, he proposed just tonight.
03:17:23
Speaker
got a ring, too. I don't know that they'll be able to see it when I'm wearing it. but like god You know you're going to show your cock ring off. We know this. ah Do I wear the studded one or the bedazzled one? Which one? I love going to gay bars. Gay bars are of fun, man.
03:17:42
Speaker
They're just like every other bar, except the ratio is like yeah i i love going to gay bars gay bars are a lot of fun men and and just like just like every other bar except the ratio is like
03:17:57
Speaker
100% different. eyes one random One random girl that stumbled in and she doesn't know where she's at. And she's like, why are none of these guys hitting on me? Oh my God, I'm so sexy.
03:18:10
Speaker
mr Probably went there because she didn't get hit on and then she finally did it. And then there's the news you know like, which one of you queens are buying my beer tonight? Scotto put the link for his hoodie back in private chat. I don't know if you saw that. oh Did he really?
03:18:27
Speaker
Yeah. You know, I feel like every time it goes to a guy, he still buys a plan B and eats it the next day.
03:18:37
Speaker
That'd be a plan though, wouldn't it? This is Harley Dad merch. Dude, my dog, yeah. Skinny, skinny, skinny. It'd be a plan C. It'd be a plan G. G for coat hanger?
03:18:56
Speaker
It's going to be a full-on deal. Sorry, Mommy Dearest. I have no toe hangers in my closet for that reason. Trust me. Go get the wire toe hangers!
03:19:09
Speaker
It's either for abortion or to unlock my keys out of my car. yeah Glick has never hung up one of his shirts in his entire life, but he still has a closet for hangers. I have a hanger in trunk.
03:19:22
Speaker
and case that I told my 20-year-old daughter. I told my 20-year-old daughter it's not too late to abort you. Keep fucking around. Yeah. sign You gotta you gotta to let him know who's boss.
03:19:33
Speaker
You put your hanger in your trunk so you can unlock your car. I did the same fucking thing and I'm like, fuck, I can't get my fucking hanger to unlock my fucking Yeah, yeah.
03:19:45
Speaker
Guess what? That's where my umbrella is too and then it always happens when I'm inside it starts raining and I'm like, fuck. how old it is are your ah How old are your guys' cars? 2017. If I accidentally lock my keys in the car, my car is like, we're not locked, asshole.
03:20:05
Speaker
And if it does lock, all I got to do is walk up to it and pull the handle, and it's just like, hey, you get drunk piece of shit, you left your keys here. Look, don't act like I got some old car. It's a 92, okay?
Car Keys and Technology
03:20:19
Speaker
My bad, Sean. I didn't know you had a brand new car. My bad. Not saying it's a wood panel station wagon or anything. That's probably the sexiest people ever created. Candy on the side of it, but. just a Big white van that says free candy inside.
03:20:40
Speaker
That's what I said. That's what the fuck I said. I mean, it is free. I see you. I see you. Brandon Biggs, All of us better. Dude, I can't.
03:20:52
Speaker
Sorry. Thanks. for that There's her go-to. I'm feeling stressed. We all feel better now. I feel better. Okay, Glick, you're making me fucking angry.
03:21:04
Speaker
Brittany's got her own built-in. What are those fucking spinner things, man? fidget Fidget spinners? Yeah. yeah On my lip ring, I just spin it with my tongue. Brittany's a fidget toy. Yeah. Scotto, can you flip that, please?
03:21:24
Speaker
So I made a 3D printed a fidget toy. oh boy. Oh, boy. yeah teach yeah When you say toy like that, it doesn't sound like it's for kids. Hang on. Full screening.
03:21:36
Speaker
Scotto puts it in his butt, and every time he farts, it creates energy. It's green energy. So these are the brown energy that you can just sit here and fiddle with. I fucking love it. I got a fidget toy you can fiddle with.
03:21:49
Speaker
How does that fit on your cock, though? I created a little box.
3D Printed Toys
03:21:53
Speaker
His cock is shaped like a... That's awesome. How is that gay if it's the it's in a box? It's not gay. It's awesome.
03:22:05
Speaker
That's pretty cool. What Scotto has is not gay. What I said was gay. I told Scotto that I had a toy that he could. I would accidentally forget that's fake and try to eat it. This is the only kind of box I'll see me ever around. I love it.
03:22:25
Speaker
I'll get in your box, Scotto. Scotto's like, I got this $6,000 fucking printer. I got to make something that makes it look like i print other shit with it. it's yeah i need give um money Oh prince dicks yeah how many dellos have you writtened so far chicago only like all um yeah' a far yeah umm um about half brand You to print off an exact glipper.
03:22:50
Speaker
you need you need you need measurements to print off a exactly and exact flipr g No, he doesn't need measurements. the smaller up and that yeah good go by memory and the smallest setting it does it by memory so fuck
03:23:13
Speaker
um either Robert Platinum said gay is when you put Vaseline on the pizza. You ah gotta pay extra for that topic.
03:23:25
Speaker
Yeah, I'm sorry about that shit. That beer went down way too quick. Creamsicle out. I'll be right back. Okay. Creamsicle out.
03:23:34
Speaker
ah You know what? I think he's the FBI agent they they scheduled to watch this. minute ten or is this aor mode Agent Creamsicle. Check in, Agent Creamsicle. Double Agent Creamsicle checking in.
03:23:54
Speaker
oh yeah Same shit. Different night. Fucking Glick is out of control. My FBI agents that are in charge of me are just like His name is the Agent Orange.
03:24:08
Speaker
Agent Orange. There you go, Scott. That's perfect. Oh, yeah. Agent Orange. Isn't that a cleaner? Is that a cleaner? He's not going to get a new drink. He's going to check in with headquarters, and then he's going to come right back. Oh, you mean Jason?
03:24:26
Speaker
Agent Orange is a following hint that they sprayed in the jungle. They're all... Ah, that's what it was. Okay. okay know it was still so bad They're just trying to make sure we're not going to all radicalize.
03:24:40
Speaker
I'm a little cream, sickle, short, and stout.
03:24:44
Speaker
Oh, cheers. Here is my bed. Cheers. Cheers. I'm hung like a bullfrog, man. and I'm hung like a field mouse.
03:24:55
Speaker
You know, Jeremiah was a bullfrog. Jeremiah was He was a good friend of mine.
03:25:06
Speaker
Oh, my God. I see what you're doing. I see what you're doing. Clever. Cheers. clear Cheers. You can't cheers and not drink.
03:25:18
Speaker
Right? What the fuck? What are you cheersing? Cheers. Cheers. Cheers. chair Cheers. Where everybody knows your name. Yeah, it's a good song, actually. Scotto, what the fuck you been up to, man? I ain't seen you in hot minute, man. Doing all right? Doing good? Good. Okay, so your nails, so you did the little magnet thing where they, like, move the metal in the nails, right? Yeah.
03:25:53
Speaker
I'll hire are you when you go get your nails done, Brittany. but I haven't gotten my nails done. metal on my fingertips because I like it. Well, no, they have like little metallic things in there. And then you take a magnet and it moves it around to make like a little design. Graphene, man. They got graphene.
03:26:12
Speaker
Yeah, the glitter is magnetically charged, so they hold a little matter on the top to bring it up to the top, and there's all these little crazy tricks you can do with the magnets to make little designs and fit with the glitter. and How do they make glitter?
03:26:25
Speaker
My girl Mona, that's her white name. Her real name is like... That's her white that's her government name. That's her white name. Mona is her white name?
03:26:35
Speaker
That's her white name, Mona? She's from Vietnam. It's her last name, Lot, Mona Lot. he's from vietnam how that's kind i got it yeah and She's from Vietnam.
03:26:48
Speaker
She does my nails, but since I do construction and shit like that, it's hard to have my nails did. this umcato but You do construction?
03:27:02
Speaker
Yeah, my whole fucking life. Construction. Let's go. My whole fucking life. Yeah, my dad's from the womb, dude.
03:27:16
Speaker
She was building shit in there. she was paving. She paved her way out the vagina. From the womb, she can build you a tomb because she does construction. yeah and then my mom left me 10 months later. so yeah, I was with my dad doing construction. i hope Yeah, your mom left you for a Mexican who burned fucking family's house down and got out of jail before your dad did.
03:27:38
Speaker
He's not Mexican. He's not Mexican. Mexican adjacent. It's different. He sounds like he's Asian. but He's new Mexican? You know what is? No. He's he new Mexican. Mexa Asian?
03:27:54
Speaker
Mexa Asian? He's He's Asian. I hate all of you guys. I hate you guys. She's like, I fucking hate you all.
03:28:05
Speaker
we're all Die slow, motherfuckers well Fucking slores Is that Summer Shandy? It is It is Hey Would that be that Summer Shandy?
03:28:16
Speaker
That be that Shandy? That be that Shandy? It tastes like water What the fuck are you talking about? The fuck are you talking about?
03:28:26
Speaker
and mean you want what tastes like water but yeah fuck you talking so fuck you talking about whatever the fuck I want on my network, bitch. See, it's the Brittany Network.
03:28:42
Speaker
Oh. Y'all bitches about to go through a whole ass reorientation. That don't do nothing to me. That don't do nothing for me or to me.
03:28:57
Speaker
Y'all silly bitches forget who don't created all of this. Or to him. Or him or to him. or yeah Yes, yes, yes. Yes, MoDog. Yes, Scotto. Yes.
03:29:12
Speaker
Scotto is definitely a president. Dude, we should vote who the fucking president is. I vote for Scotto. Let's go. president not want Scott has been voted fucking president like 47,000 times in the last six months, man.
03:29:28
Speaker
That's true story. I don't know what you want what do yeah what do you want what do you want to vote on. At the end of the day, yeah you can vote whatever you want you can make anybody feel however they want to feel. At the end of the day, I have all the power and all the control. I wield everything.
03:29:44
Speaker
I am Thanos. I am Thanos. I will make all you bitches disappear. Oh my god.
03:29:51
Speaker
do with that except for scott Except for Scotto and Modo and Shaman. And Jedi and Shaman. That's right.
03:30:05
Speaker
That's what I thought. Okay. I'm just kidding. I'm not going make you disappear, but you know you're my girl. He don't want you climbing all back up on him again. damn. You know you're my favorite. You're my little sister.
03:30:19
Speaker
You know I got you. You're his little slore. little slore. little slore. you you physical like all my fucking body you Yes, you are.
03:30:35
Speaker
but oh my fucking god ah oh and knew that that wasn't creepy at all man Who's my little slur? Come tell daddy about your day. not your slur, dude. your slur, dude. Dude, dude, dude.
03:30:59
Speaker
Man, dude. I'm not your slur, dude. Dude, man. Dude, man. I'm not your slur. Dude, if you call me a slur, dude, I'm going to be mad, dude. If you call me a slur, amen. Listen, man. listen man I was doing a good Good.
03:31:12
Speaker
God. whats your money thanks thank you so thank back to i'm a day of i am so chap
03:31:23
Speaker
so trying convince such i imitate my newport you i was doing a good good goddam job yeah and ah just good I just couldn't say the internet word. I'm allowed to... You're allowed to say the internet word? Is that what you just said? I got my ghetto pass. I got my black card. I've been told multiple times I can say it. yeah but i mean I don't think that's universal. It works in certain neighborhoods, maybe. i feel like
03:31:55
Speaker
Don't worry, guys. Don't worry, guys. I got my black card right in the middle of the hood. I get invited to a can say it. I'm not racist. I got a black friend.
03:32:09
Speaker
not racist. My tires are black. Raisins in your potato salad. The fuck is that? i'm not i'm not racist my ti my tires are black rais in your potato salad ah fuck is that It's a white thing. I don't know. no have I've been white all my life, but I've never heard of that.
03:32:27
Speaker
I've eaten so much potato salad in my life, never with raisins. Are you sure yeah the rabbit didn't just shit in your dinner? Yeah, I was going say. She's got mouth turds in her fucking potato salad. White people do not put raisins in their potato salad. Also, another stereotype that's not true.
03:32:44
Speaker
Also, another stereotype that's not true. White people season their fucking food. Alright? And... yeah okay And wash their chicken? With salt and pepper, bitches.
03:32:56
Speaker
Yeah, with salt and pepper. I didn't even know that was a stereotype. And Old Bay because we're from Maryland, bitches. Oh my god, dude. Old Bay is fucking amazing. You can put Old Bay on fucking everything.
03:33:08
Speaker
You can put Old Bay on top of tahini and that shit would be good. Let's go. Maryland. You can put it on the fucking Dreamsticle and good.
Old Bay Seasoning Exaggerations
03:33:20
Speaker
oh ba If you've never had Old Bay, you're missing out. That shit is good. now amazing Fucking Old Bay is overrated. I don't know, man. It's pretty fucking good. I don't use it very often, but when I do, I always it. I had that shit on my dick one time and that whore kept fucking sneezing like crazy.
03:33:39
Speaker
Oh, sorry. Forgot where I was at. My bad. Oh, Old Bay is on my food.
03:33:48
Speaker
Different bae. bad. New bae. Same night I had a gummy. ah Jersey calls Moe Dog old boo. no but Old bae boo. Old boo bae.
03:34:02
Speaker
She just calls him like Just old. Speaking of having a gummy. There goes my boner. yeah
03:34:15
Speaker
there goes my boner
03:34:18
Speaker
Did it? Or did it get bigger? I just said there it goes. I didn't say it went away. old bay is perfectgra first and he just didn't say enough. Like, oh,
03:34:32
Speaker
there it goes there go my owner there goes' to my waistpan again fight there it goes again your tone Hello, darkness, my missile of love. About to get glickened again.
03:34:57
Speaker
you clicked all over The is sickening. yeah Yeah, you know what? buck Get ready because it's thickening. look mean back to me I like what Shaman says. Yeah, that's why Shaman says.
03:35:20
Speaker
that Shaman says, fuck you, Jed. thought we were friends. I know who my real friend is. It's Shaman. And I'm friend at the end. Calm down, Chuckie. Yeah. over here.
03:35:31
Speaker
oh ah calm down sure that yeah ah good town over here oh Hey, let's not say that in this discussion because then we might get looped into a whole other group of people.
03:35:50
Speaker
Yeah, you even say though the movie title child's play anymore, otherwise people look east side. And we here too already. We're talking about pizza.
03:36:04
Speaker
Hashtag pizza. Yeah, but that was the click version of pizza gate. That's different. My fucking life. Wait, what's your life? Pizza. One Chris, one Chris, one Chris, one Chris, one Chris, one Chris, one. I've worked at four different pizza places.
03:36:22
Speaker
I know how to make it from scratch. Everything. I'm a dumb hoe. My ex-wife used to try to cook from scratch, but she could never find it in the store, so she never did. Brittany, when you were about to say that, year you looked at your hand like, do i have enough fingers left for four?
03:36:37
Speaker
Really? I have four. You double-checked yourself. about to say.
03:36:49
Speaker
but for right who ordered that pepperoni crabs Hold on, let me get my crab catcher. Need some old bait from aisle two, please.
03:37:05
Speaker
Breathe, Brittany, breathe. but Use your ears. Come on. Did we I used to show up to my old job on the like white
03:37:23
Speaker
Wait, what was your job on the boat? I'm on a boat. You needed to find out a little better. Boats and hoes. Boats and slores. Let's go. I'm on a motherfucking boat. Slores on shores.
03:37:39
Speaker
so Slores getting to shores. Yes. Dude. So many new words and sayings tonight. yes I love you dude. That's fucking awesome. You're in charge of notating all these. I lived on the water.
03:37:55
Speaker
Oh I should learn to read and write. You lived on the water. Well you said you worked on a boat. like well you said you worked on a boat I did also work on a boat. was masturbator. I put work in a boat. You don't need to be in a boat. Brittany, I can attest to this person. She rode her boat.
03:38:18
Speaker
Brittany's got a whole new version of what a crab boat is.
Living on a Boat
03:38:23
Speaker
yeah Wait, what'd you do what'd you do on a boat? What'd you do? Seriously. oh like I lived on a boat. We had a boat and so I would show up to work on the back well yeah like One day, one day I bought a boat.
03:38:39
Speaker
I named it Jenny. I named it Jenny. She was a whore.
03:38:47
Speaker
She was a slower. went to Vietnam and Jenny fucked all my friends. She was a slower. She was a slower. I had sex with Jenny and I caught crabs.
03:39:02
Speaker
Instead I on the dock he's like And then you turn back around and the boat turns around that scene where instead i started running i was it chi um when he's on the dock he's like for your grab oh and then you turn around and the boat turns around and and it goes the other way he said it happens what crabs crabs happen you can get crabs from just about anything ah through click we get together and get drunk at at a fucking game while we're getting arrested dude I'm just saying i got cry apple we're bail shit together
03:39:51
Speaker
We're going to make sure abby par Jersey and my and and my significant other have bail money. Right. And it's not like we're going to do anything horrible. We're just going to be Just going to be us and that'll be enough.
03:40:06
Speaker
Why get an Uber or a Lyft? Or a Gaber. Whatever. our gay we love it we've got We might get a hotel with two beds. We might get a hotel with one bed. don't know. It's cheaper.
03:40:22
Speaker
We might not get a of hotel. We just might walk to the nearest hotel and walk into our room and crash there. two Two big ass bear motherfuckers like, we only need one ten bit twenty one twin bed, sir.
03:40:34
Speaker
Really? Do you want to bring that up? What happens when the bear picks itself? That's not where I was going. I'm sorry.
03:40:50
Speaker
That's not what I was doing. Just drop it. Brittany got all serious. We'll move on from that shit. Move on. I didn't mean to do that. That's not what I was doing. I'm sorry.
03:41:00
Speaker
I'm sorry. I really am. Yeah, yeah, yeah. yeah can
03:41:09
Speaker
and ah dog i fucking hate you bull dog and g good i hate you too, Back to Big Adventure.
03:41:19
Speaker
i you coming as youll ever meet the coming winner of twenty twenty six yes it's brittanney van hello e don't make that sound I got some good memories of getting drunk on a beach in South Carolina. Oh, it's going again next time it plays. I love South Carolina, man.
03:41:45
Speaker
Oh, dude, I cannot wait to get down That's where I wanted to stay when I got out of the fucking core. My no my wife wanted to fucking move back here. I want i wanted my kids. My kids were five and three when I got out. I wanted them to grow up like Carolina babies and shit. You know?
03:41:58
Speaker
Yeah, I want to stay down in Carolinas and shit, man.
03:42:03
Speaker
My kids' as mom were like, I was like, I'm going back to Ohio. My son was born in Charleston, and he was like, Dad, I want to go back to Charleston. I'm like, well, take it up with your fucking... Charleston White?
03:42:15
Speaker
What? Charleston Black. My son was my son was born in Beaufort, South Carolina, and my daughter was born in Havelock, North Carolina. Yeah. so No. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Robert, 100% inexpensive.
03:42:31
Speaker
Taxes are free. Yeah, that's why we're doing it. Oh, dude. Jersey Modal Glick and his significant other, his lady friend. That's good. Down in South Carolina. Get it, get it. Get one of the party houses on the beach and shit?
03:42:47
Speaker
And then Chuck Town. Yeah, Chuck Town lay you down. shit. We're going to hell and hell. We can all go in for a house on on the beach. Hell yeah. house Jersey already knows this, but if I could, my favorite city like down in the south would be the fuck, I'd love to live in Savannah.
03:43:02
Speaker
I fucking love Savannah. causeannah Savannah is beautiful. Yeah. It's fucking awesome. Everybody loves Savannah. Shut the fuck up. There's a few hours there.
03:43:13
Speaker
sister city of Charleston because Savannah and Charleston are but basically identical. They model Savannah after Charleston. I mean, go yeah it's the sister city. It's close. so you know you know the really haunted cemetery down there?
03:43:31
Speaker
and Yeah, I forget the name of it. yeah the woman like on The one that little Gracie's buried in and shit. I can't fuck. I can't remember that. me Yeah. What the fuck is it called? so What the fuck is called? Sorry. I'm getting excited because I know what you're talking about. I like it. Okay.
Drunken Cemetery Exploration
03:43:51
Speaker
know okay So, like, me and me me and two other Marines went up there for the fucking weekend. We were hanging out in Savannah.
03:43:58
Speaker
And we got drunk as fuck and, and like, snuck into the into the fucking cemetery, basically. And... We're all, and and I believe in the paranormal, right? I'm not one of those like tries to make others believe in shit, but I grew up in a haunted house and saw ghosts and shit, right? But anyway, we're in there fucking around because we're drunk as hell, man.
03:44:16
Speaker
and And we start seeing shit, you know, like we start seeing shit that ain't there. Not because we were fucking drunk, but because we were seeing fucking like some apparitions and shit, like ducking behind tombstones and shit.
03:44:27
Speaker
Yeah, yeah. And because we were drunk, we were like, oh, we're going to pull some fucking marine maneuvers on this shit. We're going to flank them on this side and that side. We spent until the fucking sun came up and and we had a fucking blast. Yeah, yeah, yeah. It was fucking fun as shit, man.
03:44:45
Speaker
Yeah, we were like chasing them around the fucking graveyard and shit, man. That's so dope. I actually fucking love that. It was fun as shit. It was fun as shit. Dude. Dude.
03:44:55
Speaker
Yeah, man. It was a good time. yeah a coat offer Good fucking time, man. that sounds like But I love it. yeah love all the old architecture and the cobblestone streets and the Spanish moss and the trees and the fountains and the squares. my cousin you hit the money side. go to like yeah we used to go to like We would hold our breath when we'd drive past the cemeteries or whatever. You should hold your breath right now.
03:45:27
Speaker
Shut the fuck up, man. My mom used to say that shit. Gotta hold your breath when drive past the cemetery. and We went to a lot of abandoned houses. And this one abandoned house that my cousins and I went to, oh like I went in the bathroom and and There was like yeah thats too like skin like from somebody's scalp. And I was like, yo, we got to get fucked. Were there any engines around?
03:46:01
Speaker
any of Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa. Don't do that. Don't do that. yeah i'm out of trouble I got in trouble earlier for making fun of the engines. I offered all el one a blanket.
03:46:12
Speaker
I offered one a blanket. And then his mommy and daddy got all butt hurt. so You got Angel backstage. like and yeah Okay. I'm not doing the backstage. Thank you. girl. Hi. Hi, guys. Hi. Welcome back, handsome.
03:46:27
Speaker
was trying to be a beautiful queen. up, Brittany. My shadow's back. handsome i was sorry if i be thank you beautiful queen you i was like bringing me my shadows back Finish it up, Britt. Finish it up, man.
Paranormal Sensitivity
03:46:46
Speaker
I'm all enthralled. I need to know. I'm just teasing, Britt. Finish your story.
03:46:51
Speaker
and It was haunted. We saw some shit. It was in the middle of like a month. Best ghost story ever. It was haunted. We saw some shit. we saw so I mean, I laughed.
03:47:03
Speaker
I cried. was scared. It was a ride. It was ride. It was a piece of hair. it was a ah piece of hair wait like i real and like Like literally somebody just got murdered in that house and you were there. Yes, that's why I said let's get the fuck out of here.
03:47:20
Speaker
Like not one of those unbelievable things? Yeah. Unbelievable. You know, that's how I feel every Friday. I have this cute faceless disembodied voice next to me.
03:47:34
Speaker
towards you I think it's a
03:47:38
Speaker
I've got legit fucking ghost stories that I could tell people that are actual like real shit I love the paranormal I believe in ghosts, stuff like that my great grandma told me and I know it to be true, um I'm sensitive to that the other side So am I. Yeah.
03:47:56
Speaker
We can talk about this on another night. but No, we don't. This is how to talk about it tonight. Yeah, closer to Halloween, we should have like a ghost story night or something, man. Dude, you want to You want to? Yeah. Yeah, yeah, yeah. want to do a Saturday night where we... Fuck yeah.
03:48:09
Speaker
I got stories. Ghost stories. Glick's ghost stories. I love it. Let's follow it. Glick's ghost galleria. like Like Halloween's on a Friday this year, so either do it the night after Halloween or the weekend before.
03:48:22
Speaker
I'll be be
03:48:38
Speaker
um'll be here to talk i got ask him we guys stream on ah is it new hollow way ah always string yeah we're go do a holiday of course it's on friday we're all yeah no hope yeah yeah the halloween is actually on friday yeah So we'll do it the weekend. can would It's funny. It's almost like I just said that a minute ago. I just need to, I just,
03:49:03
Speaker
i just don't know what's going on and everybody's my kids are home for halloween
03:49:10
Speaker
are you goingnna be okay brittanney No, I don't think so. This is what happens when you have more two people on panel, girl. Brittany, you got to do the arm thing. It calms everybody down. Okay. Everybody. Everything's better.
03:49:23
Speaker
We just found our team. think it Brittany down. I think it calms Brittany down. It calms me down. It calms me down. It's like your built-in. Everybody's going to come on here and tell their biologicals.
03:49:35
Speaker
I'm down. I'll be here for it. Please play the trailer for Blackula. Brittany's possessed now.
03:49:46
Speaker
I got stories. I just have a hard time. Yeah, so do I. Some scary, some not scary, but real. yeah Real deal Holyfield.
03:50:00
Speaker
I'll be here too. Where are you going to be at, Jersey? it's gonna be on shadows but You're too good to come up on panel, Jersey? Is that what it is? Yeah, Jersey. chatter's box yeah jersey day What day did you talk? what what That's why he's going to come see me before he comes see you.
03:50:24
Speaker
wake up tomorrow with a knock on the door and it's going to be Jersey going, what now, motherfucker? bits we're just like and fucking Time's up, I didn't mean i don't mean it. He's two hours away. Why didn't you not kill me and go down there and see him? Because I got to help her hide the fucking body. What the fuck?
03:50:44
Speaker
I'll drive you. Allegedly. Allegedly, yeah. Might be in a house. Some of your hair might be on the wall. just saying. Allegedly.
03:50:55
Speaker
You're terrible at this. It's my first day being on a panel, man. Cut me some slack. You're doing great. Thanks, Dad.
03:51:05
Speaker
Thanks, man. This is the quietest I've ever seen you, Jedi. You sure do have a nice mic. I'm sorry, Jersey. He was here before I knew about you.
03:51:16
Speaker
I'm sorry, Jersey. He was here before I knew about you. And then he started sharing his purple crayons with me. And I didn't even know about you. You feel a little betrayed. i do, Jedi. Thank you, Jedi. Thank you for it. You complete me, Jedi.
03:51:30
Speaker
He is quiet. I have my application still pending for the Lazy and Shaman show. You didn't show up for your interview. We scheduled it three times and you are a no-show all three times. Oh, Brits. Jedi and Shaman and myself, we had a conference call.
03:51:54
Speaker
and Unfortunately, I'm stuck. It was more like a circle bird. That's
Personal Quirks and Preferences
03:52:00
Speaker
not true. that's not true I hung up on the call when he said he was keeping you. I said, bitch, fuck off. And I hung up. I never wanted to keep you. I was trying to give you to them. slammed the phone down. And it was a rotary phone, too.
03:52:15
Speaker
So for me to pick it up, it was it was it was flame all heavy. It was an awkward circle. It was an awkward circle jerk. You know?
03:52:25
Speaker
oh Jedi made sure that both Shaman and I finished. that was That was very gracious of him. no congratulation first explain the minute The minute he picked up the phone, he came immediately. that's what started the meeting.
03:52:39
Speaker
It was really awkward after that. That's because I was in the pictures of Scott O before called me. The excuse to go clean himself up because it all got in his belly button. Sometimes that happens on the first time.
03:52:55
Speaker
He didn't even have a towel ready? What the fuck? No, he didn't. He was unprepared. He had a tissue. I didn't know that we were having a conference call and I was talking to him and my phone was ringing and I got overly excited and it was not my finest moment.
03:53:12
Speaker
not my finest moment Tissues and wet wipes. Yeah, for Glick, it should be like one little ply of tool paper. One ply. night One ply. One ply. That's all it takes. What the is happening tonight? like a A lot. all Everything's happening. A lot is happening tonight.
03:53:31
Speaker
Oh my god, dude. hiccups? yet. need to bend over? Oh my god. Do you steve can need me to make your bend over? Jersey's gonna
03:53:43
Speaker
I didn't say me. I said, do you need to bend over? Scotto? Come on, Scotto.
03:53:53
Speaker
yeah I heard that. If you but you don't bend over, you can at least lean forward little bit. It's going to the second box you've been in.
03:54:03
Speaker
Tonight. Tonight, yeah. You're fucking dumb. Oh, my God. You guys are awesome. Thank you guys for being here.
03:54:16
Speaker
I love hate you guys, man. I love him yeah and hate you guys. Yeah, dude. You guys make me contemplate and seriously consider unaliving myself on ah on a weekly basis.
03:54:30
Speaker
but seen I'm glad I can i'm glad i could do that for you. you know but But then Shaman comes in and I'm like, I have so much to live for. Shaman's here and then Shaman makes me If you work real hard, Glick, you could have no face too someday.
03:54:46
Speaker
Exactly. Yo, yo.
03:54:49
Speaker
yeah Yo, yo. It's a reminder that you just have too much. Yo, yo, yo, yo, yo. yo yo yo Mic check one, two. I'm about to drop the sickest rhyme of all time. we Yo, yo, mic check, mic check. Go DJ, one time.
03:55:06
Speaker
and You ready for that? Glicky, glicky. He rhymes on accident.
03:55:16
Speaker
oh that's so funny. He didn't mean to do that. they Oh, fuck. Everything I do. It's what I do. It's what happens. Off the top of the dome, son.
03:55:29
Speaker
Off the top of the dome. You can't even show your face. of it and whatever I shouldn't show my face. I shouldn't show my face. That's what's up,
03:55:43
Speaker
Hell yeah, we on the big screen. Let's go, baby. What are you talking about? My girl got us on the big screen. I like big screens.
03:55:54
Speaker
Who's your girl? Hey, girl. Hey, girl. Hi. your mom. Hi, new one. Hey, look my PMP. My mom's dead. Look at my PMP, son.
03:56:07
Speaker
Yo, look. That's my PMP right there. That's my PMP. What are you about? Again, PMP, son. What you ready? gang gang that's what we're talking about brit yeah yeah you know that's why glick believes in ghosts because he's that's his girl i okay i will say glick i am kind of surprised
03:56:35
Speaker
what's your I'm sorry. I'm sorry. i'm looking at you I'm looking at the chat. I'm sorry. Wait, what did you say? oh Let me listen to you. Everybody shut the fuck up so I can get my uninvited attention to Brittany. Shut the fuck up, motherfuckers.
03:56:49
Speaker
I'm just surprised that you actually believe in ghosts is what I wanted to say. One sentence. Are you serious? We've talked about it so much. wait Well, you and Blaze did.
03:57:02
Speaker
Yeah, Blaze is a skeptic and they make fun of me constantly for believing in ghosts. but I'm not allowed on there. so I only believe in ghosts because my daddy ghosted me when I was young. and That's why Xalvin hates corner stores and trips for milk.
03:57:18
Speaker
yeah but so man somon you Shaman, your dad didn't ghost you. He's looking for the right gallon of milk and that right pack of cigarettes before he comes home. He just wants what's best for you. My mom did the same shit.
03:57:37
Speaker
Like I said, I believe in the shit, but I don't try to like force it on anybody else. they don't believe, that's fine. Fatherhood? yeah What if Thomas added Brittany's cup together to look for milk? Jedi, you might be onto something, man.
03:57:53
Speaker
I'm just saying. Well, damn, Brittany. Don't lean closer to the mic and then fucking snort. ah yeah That makes all our fucking like laptops and shit rattle, man.
03:58:07
Speaker
How rude. I got beer. You got his fatherhood? but Right?
03:58:23
Speaker
but really it's it's in my beard it's it's fucking everywhere everywhere everywhere exactly same thing but about mother yeganty scott just slides in with the i here Everybody can breathe again and don't you talk about assholes.
03:58:55
Speaker
got that's why i did better way yeah scott doesn gonna have to pull a bla and tuck it up into his waistband
03:59:06
Speaker
and somebody's child what the fucking you do okay That's not right ah doess not really though, Lazy.
03:59:14
Speaker
he sucking the waistband that's why you don't tuck it into the waist It just emerges up into the waistband. i Yeah, you tuck it up and I've seen it.
03:59:25
Speaker
I don't have a dick, but I know I've seen it. I've seen a dick tucked before. You can't tell me different. I've seen it in the goddamn waistband, okay? You can't tell me different. Listen, when I was 13 years old, I was with my dad and we saw a guy in the park and he tucked it.
03:59:44
Speaker
He tucked his penis. We saw it. I had something wrong with you now. My dad said, don't look, Ethel. You know how I know that story is a fucking lie? Because you said you were at the park with your dad.
03:59:55
Speaker
Right. I wasn't going to call him out on it, but whatever. Shut your black ass up, Shaman. My mom is a transgender. Thank you very much. oh I was at the corner store with my EBT card. Mom and to dad, god damn it. Get me some chicken. god How dare you not respect their pronouns, okay? sorry so Sorry. Sorry, mama shaman.
04:00:27
Speaker
or um and My pronouns are tucked back. We call her mama shaman. Sorry, Mama Shaman. I didn't mean to. I like that. Okay, Glenn, you actually made it funny me for once.
04:00:40
Speaker
funny. that's that That's how you know people like each other when you can like fucking like rip on each other and nobody really takes it seriously and gets pissed off. Except Britney. She gets kind of mad sometimes. Fuck off, you little bitch.
04:00:54
Speaker
See? obviously yeah Love hates you too. hope you melt in the sun, you fucking dreamsicle. Right? don't want to melt. but don't want to melt um i didn' kind I do kind of blend in with the fucking wall behind me, don't I? It's like a head, just a head floating around and shit. know what's funny? noticed earlier, the background, like the background thing is like a beer can. It's got that like orange beer color and it goes right up into you. You're like the fucking shoot of the beer.
04:01:21
Speaker
yeah Right up into you, bro. That's me. I'm the shoot. Yeah, the poop shoot. The poop shoot. yeah I've been to black churches before, Robert. I know what you're talking about.
04:01:38
Speaker
I mean, I've been back by injection a few times. so i guess i
04:01:45
Speaker
jeda you never sir mix a lot said it best like be fuck so and you were the but kid did now With my dick I um sorry wait what um you're talking about talking i think it says what saw respect around it a't funny if i got to explain the shit to you guys man yeah the father and son the holy game stuff fuck up it's kind of like you do have to explain that Well, but you got it. You got it at the last second. I saw you.
04:02:17
Speaker
Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. cook Just explain it, Dad. Dad, explain your joke, Dad. Yeah, Dad. I'm blonde. Don't you know, Dad?
Hair Color Debate
04:02:31
Speaker
That's what it is. She's blonde.
04:02:32
Speaker
Giggity. Stoner blonde. red? It's blonde. rat around gentlemen is it is it blon or red thing Because when you have it up, it looks red.
04:02:45
Speaker
Cherry blonde. it's It's like... it's Like strawberry blonde? She's got that slur blonde hair. But that's cherry, though.
04:02:56
Speaker
She's got that slur hair. Yeah, let's go. What color would you like? Slur number four, please. Slur number four. It's like mambo number five. I'm sorry. I'm sorry, ma'am. Glick was in here earlier. We're out of that.
04:03:15
Speaker
It's strawberry in these streets.
04:03:20
Speaker
put it all in his dumb characters all this is wait wait but we and it gli man it's scraw scrawberry it's scrawberry board yeah were replie a little though it's scrawlberry and newres I'm from Baltimore.
04:03:42
Speaker
I'm from Baltimore. boower Yeah, Robertson down south, man. It's strawberries in these streets. Go to the script club.
04:03:53
Speaker
Cheers, y'all. Cheers. Are you going to actually take a drink this time? Okay, there you go. Drinking some of that Tittos.
04:04:07
Speaker
but me She has
Cultural Credentials Debate
04:04:10
Speaker
an empty cup inside of it She spit it back into She was like Yeah I seen that move in 8th grade At the house party That's what they do on dogma You drank your backwash You drank your backwash To prove a point That's water I have a lot Tito's don't have a worm in it The fuck
04:04:34
Speaker
No, that's gold slugger, isn't it? No. he Tequila. You thought she was a red hair. No, she's blind. She's fucking blind. I have to go off camera to laugh.
04:04:50
Speaker
Robert, I tried to tell these fools earlier. I tried to tell these fools earlier I got my black card. I got my ghetto pass. They didn't believe me. You know. believe you I never had the warm tequila.
04:05:04
Speaker
Wait. clickckman like Just because you got on the bus today, that does not mean you have your black heart. hang out and this Just because you said hi to a black person today. That's my friend. Mom, look, that's my friend.
04:05:19
Speaker
oh oh phone I got black friends. My fucking niece. who suggested any Anybody she said hi to, that was her fucking friend, man. That's my friend. Bitch, you waved at each other in passing. Shut the fuck up. That's a homeless person that wanted a dollar.
04:05:36
Speaker
Exactly. yes Yes, Robert. bottom of I'm not racist. I watch black people on TV. so Yeah, I watch well he is Look as white with the door skin. Jedi said I watch BET. That's what I would say. um a like um' like I'm Soul train. watch Arsenio Hall. Oh, you're white fuck.
04:06:06
Speaker
I only watch The Family Feud with Steve Harvey. I watch your mama. no who I watch your mama too. Fucking white people. Fucking white people, bro.
04:06:17
Speaker
Yo, mama watches me.
04:06:23
Speaker
Perry presents white people that don't think they're racist. I'm not even going to say anything. Obviously, I'm white. whatever. But yeah, your mama.
04:06:35
Speaker
Hell, Jedi did the dance down the middle of the line on Soul Train. What are you talking about, that
TV Shows and Racism Claims
04:06:40
Speaker
nobody saw as I went viral, okay? Lazy is the reason they have the line.
04:06:46
Speaker
everybody Everybody thought their TV was broke because it was this white glitch on the screen. I will you how fucking move right and that's actually how they do it the Full screen, Brittany. Full screen, Brittany.
04:07:03
Speaker
ah and do And do your arms while you're doing the moonwalk. That's like one-upping Michael Jackson if you do that. don't know how to make her full screen. I don't know how to make her full screen.
04:07:17
Speaker
Oh my god, he just backstageed her. You click on her and you make it bigger. There you go. We're ready. corn and you make it bigger that's like yeah they ro there you go ready but
04:07:31
Speaker
yeah yeah yeah eyes draw um back ra walk that's That's exactly how I She's a goddamn gremlin.
04:07:49
Speaker
i told scott it fli that shit she's a fuck she got a floorwa yeah i'm just fucking growing that was way better than i could ever do but she's a g grimlin Dude, it's better when my feet aren't fucking sweaty, okay?
04:08:05
Speaker
Well, dry them off. You have paper towels? Listen, you had one chance. Why are your feet sweaty? Why are your feet sweaty? That's the only thing that's sweaty right now. feet sweat when I get drunk. My man, Robert. The lower gravity out on the moon makes my feet dry. I can't move more. My man was about to finish. My man, Robert.
04:08:31
Speaker
Sprat. yeaha Sprat. When drink, I get the feet sweats. I feel like Robert and Brittany are going to be married someday. I know, right?
04:08:42
Speaker
I know a
04:08:49
Speaker
will. Robert's going to lock her ass in cage in basement. wife. You're my wife now. You're mine. You're mine now, woman.
04:09:04
Speaker
How'd you lock them in the basement? Hey girl, got you out of them screech and now you my wife. No, I got my bros that take care me. You Mrs. Robert Platinum now.
04:09:13
Speaker
Bitch. Bitch. Bitch. Brittany, if you're relying on Glick to take care of you, you are in fucking trouble, girlfriend. and I'm taking care of her. Your fucking feet going to start sweating.
04:09:29
Speaker
Robert Bucco's going to be like, you thirsty? My feet are sweating just thinking about it. I also can't moonwalk now. With sweaty feet, that's going to make it real hard to spin over to the front.
04:09:42
Speaker
I can't moonwalk. Dude, I literally i won the moonwalk competition at Dew Tour. i don't know if you guys know what that is. Yeah, dude. I have the fucking moonwalk. She said, I got the foot plaque to prove it.
04:09:57
Speaker
I do. I have the whole fucking thing.
Soul Food Stories
04:10:00
Speaker
um like Just because you're fucking winning moon type doesn't mean she's gonna fucking win the moonwalk. In reality, nobody's ever walked on the moon.
04:10:09
Speaker
Do you know what the detour is? Ooh, there we go. don't want talk about that. I'm getting tired up there. no Hey, nobody cares about your moonwalk. Robert said if Brittany was married to me, she would smile so much, she would get face cramps. Hey, you don't remember the moon shoes they used to sell back in the day?
04:10:32
Speaker
I used to have some. They were great. They're just these big rubber bands. Yeah, bounce. It was the dumbest shit I've ever seen in my life. Yeah, my It feels like you're walking on the moon.
04:10:47
Speaker
Okay, literally, the moon shoes were, like, getting you prepared to be drunk in your mid-20s, okay? Because that's what it felt like walking in those was, like, when you're fucking wasted and trying to, like, stand up straight.
04:10:59
Speaker
And that's all they were. Oh, shut up. I can't fucking get into where I'm going, dude. Scotto, that is the greatest screen grab of all time. Yeah. already made it as BFB. I did. What?
04:11:13
Speaker
what ah sorry you guys we slept with Oh my gosh. It has Courtney Love vibes to it. It's got Courtney Love vibes to You are our little gremlin.
04:11:26
Speaker
You are amazing. That is amazing. You know what? Scatto knows how to take everybody's thing and just make it funny. Yes. That is our little gremlin right there. Speaking of Scatto, we're going to see some Scatto's work for my PFP.
04:11:44
Speaker
yeah yeah and Oh my god
04:11:52
Speaker
god. Just saying, Brittany, I feel your pain. I feel your pain. A little gremlin right there. Just gremlin it out. Whatever, man.
04:12:04
Speaker
Doing what gremlins do. Hello, ladies and gentlemen. help me oh What up, bitches? My name is Brittany. I'm a gremlin. yeah i live that gremlin life yeah it's britney clearly nobody's gotten wet yet i don't think anybody's trying now except for robert bladdenum so you can't talk and so and we drink so yeah and did by do that Angel, I love you. q are i robert platinum Robert Platinum is is is love he's in love. and
04:12:42
Speaker
Brittany is a bad man with Jim. I'm a bad man with Jim. He said wife-a. He wife-a. Cheers. I moonwalked to the bathroom to take a piss and I pissed all over my carpet all the way to the bathroom. What the fuck? Bro, you should get a diaper or something.
04:13:03
Speaker
not my well
04:13:07
Speaker
No, DUTOR is a skating, surfing competition, BMX thing that it was a little beach. And so I won the moonwalking competition at the DUTOR.
04:13:22
Speaker
That's all I wanted to fucking say. and I have card that says my profession is moonwalking. So fuck all of you. Do you have a carpet that says it? No. It's a carpet.
04:13:37
Speaker
oh What's carved in your carpet? What? Crabs. Crabs are in the carpet. Crabs on field. Yeah. That was good.
04:13:47
Speaker
It depends, Robert.
04:13:52
Speaker
What does 80-year-old pussy taste like? Depends. I love that fucking joke. I say that all the time. Scotto, I love you. You're a fucking champion.
04:14:05
Speaker
Scotto is fucking champion. What's the hardest part about eating vegetables? What did he win? Click. Click. Click. Click
04:14:18
Speaker
looks to asshole What's the hardest part eating eat vegetables? ah Getting the diaper out the way. ah Yeah, see who's hiding? Yeah, we're going to get arrested, dude. Oh, first time, we're canceled.
04:14:36
Speaker
I used to have a co-worker that was a fucking idiot, and used to say, you're so I wouldn't tell him this to his face, but I'd say he's so stupid, his idea of a porno magazine was the Vegetarian Times. Yeah.
04:14:48
Speaker
but of love that did he get it or did no
04:15:07
Speaker
he's like my friend scotto funny how the dumb motherfuckers you work with always think you're your friend and shit because you're picking on them you're too stupid to fucking pick it up
04:15:20
Speaker
Like people on panels, yeah. Oh my god, dude.
04:15:31
Speaker
you motherfuckers say about me when I went to piss? Yeah, fuck you, dude. really ham muroc Orange man bad. Orange man bad. Creamsicles terrible. Creamsicles suck.
04:15:45
Speaker
Creamsicles sucks. I will never wear this fucking shirt again. I'm burning it after tonight. No, it's just a combination with the hat, too. you know yeah yeah Yeah. look like my car. My car is orange, and I don't like it. Oh, shit. You look like a Nissan Rogue.
04:16:08
Speaker
like i don't yeah good you look like a niar road Hey, we talked about that. have a Nissan Rogue. I'm not the only one. All black. I knew somebody had one.
04:16:20
Speaker
Yeah, we talked about it. You told me your car I told you mine. i have a Nissan Rogue with all fucking interiors all and everything else. And the parts red. yeah That's right. Nice.
04:16:31
Speaker
I just figured she drove a Nissan Rogue. Now I know why. What the fuck's wrong with my hat, man? Why are you guys picking on my hat and shit?
Exotic Food Experiences
04:16:40
Speaker
love it. Good game.
04:16:44
Speaker
I like the rogue though like the rogue oh my god no he did not no he did not yeah your beard still matches your complexion and your shirt matches my pubic hair too oh my fuck I mean if we're gonna compare shit fuck you know matches my chest hair
04:17:05
Speaker
i mean if we're going to compare shit fuck broken matches my chest there what about your ass hair does that match ass hair no i shave that i shave that ah good man good quick likes it clean you know oh you shave all your i i like i like a little i like i like a little chesticles little chesticle hair he's like he's like i'm not gonna go there if i could
04:17:37
Speaker
so Yeah, let's keep this a family show. There you go. I'm going to go smoke some weed. I will be back. Click's like, I like that recent stripe. Just not between the cracks of your ass.
04:17:51
Speaker
Yeah. Hey, Robert Fallon, Chitlins. I saw that, Scotto. You put it up quick, but I saw it. I've seen it too, Scotto.
04:18:04
Speaker
Chitlins, and if you know what they are, you're not going them. If you smell em you're not going to eat them. Yeah, I agree.
04:18:15
Speaker
had chitlins for the first time down South Carolina and I was like, yeah, never again. Hey, bring them on. Bring them on. i'm um um I'm here for it, Robert. Bring me them chitlins on. I know what they are.
04:18:26
Speaker
I know what they smell like when you're cooking them, but I don't give a damn. They're delicious. Well, it's like fucking liver and onions. Liver and onions smell fucking amazing. Who the fuck ever said liver and onions smells amazing?
04:18:39
Speaker
What the fuck? If it's cooked right, if it's fucking cooked right. Oh, my God. Well, okay. There you go. Well, my mom couldn't cook. used to make liver and onions the time, and I couldn't stand on shit. Jersey said there you go. I mean, I'll eat the fuck out of some chitlins.
04:18:53
Speaker
Some chitlins and collard greens? Yeah. Oh, I love me some collard greens. but look How do you like chitlins but you don't like collard greens, Angel? What the fuck?
04:19:04
Speaker
I don't like any of them. That's all fucking nasty shit. Shit. Your accent just slipped out, man. don't like that shit. Hey, man. i had shittlins i had chitlins up here in Ohio shit there one ever moved to south carolina and i got a buddy of mine and got invited to the family, the family cookout, to the barbecue, to the cookout. bbque
04:19:36
Speaker
And I was, I was like, but yeah, I walked up there. Who the fuck the white boy is?
04:19:43
Speaker
Cops, cops, cops, Scott, you the shout out to my boy Dom. Shout to my boy Dom, man. Love you, brother. Uh, Good people, good time. We had we we we had a fantastic time. i man and yeah Anybody that says the anybody that says what cut when if cut fuck, I can't talk. ah Stroke much? No.
04:20:03
Speaker
Anybody that says fucking chitlins smell good if they're cooked properly are fucking lying to you. No, chitlins smell terrible. They're fucking disgusting. They hit different. They hit different, man. I love me some chitlins and collard beans.
04:20:19
Speaker
Chitlins and and some cornbread. i'm I'm down with all that except the chitlins. Chitlins are amazing. you can smell You can smell South Carolina all the way to Virginia. And it ain't a good smell.
04:20:40
Speaker
It ain't a good smell, but it's tasty. Collard greens, mustard greens, all shit. go for that and Bearded dragons, and that's about it. Hey, we still cook a whole-ass pig in Ohio, too. Well, coard collard greens is one of those, if they're not cooked right, they taste like shit, too, though.
04:20:55
Speaker
Yeah. i mean I mean, whoever... But if they're cooked right, they man, they're fucking... I mean, good shit. I mean, we do that shit in Orlando. Because the whole pig is this shit.
04:21:08
Speaker
that's what we do up here in Ohio, too, man. We feel thats we dig a whole-ass pig, man. You throw that whole sumbitch right into that hole. That's right here, too. They put that fucker on a huge ass rotisserie.
04:21:24
Speaker
a
04:21:29
Speaker
I got... Baby, what are chitlins?
04:21:37
Speaker
You asked my kind of wondering like oh My girlfriend asked, what are chitlins? and It's actually... it's it's it's For those of you who don't know, it's chitterlings.
04:21:49
Speaker
It's chitterlings, also known as chickens. Basically, it's it's the intestines of a pig.
04:22:00
Speaker
I i mean, there's no there's no way around it. It's it's the intestines of a pig. See, that's one of those things that makes me think, like,
04:22:11
Speaker
Like shit we eat, right? That makes me go by Who the fuck for the very first time said We should try eating this You know? Who was the first person that said Let me try eating some fucking pig intestines Tell everybody that That wouldn't waste anything I mean, yeah, there's that it's it'ss society Yeah, there's that, but i look Hey, look I mean, i mean let's be honest let's be honest Let's do our history Let's do our history And dive into the history Y'all remember, Glick has a black friend.
04:22:44
Speaker
Remember that. I have i basic too yes question needs buck when needs bus forget that basically black at this point. Back in the day, slaves were not fed very well, so they they found other means necessary.
04:22:57
Speaker
And that's where chitlins came from. Let's be honest. I'm just going to do this just because I'm a smoker. Oh, shit. you doing? up girl i you doing
04:23:13
Speaker
I could have sworn that was from the where it fucking was. It's not disgusting. It sounds disgusting. It smells disgusting. But when you taste them, oh. And it is disgusting. Have you ever had cow tongue?
04:23:25
Speaker
Cow tongue? Yes. Cow tongue is delicious. It's so good. Just like Rocky Mountain oysters cooked, right? Motherfuckers actually taste good. So what basically, for those of you who don't know, what Mo Dog said is that he enjoys having balls in his mouth.
04:23:41
Speaker
I mean, you know. As long as they're cooked right. Exactly. They've got to be cooked right, man. i didn't for mushrooms i didn't know that I didn't know that. I was eating them like for the first time. I didn't know what it was. i was like nobody swallow there was There was like nine or ten of them on the fucking you know like on the plate or whatever. and i was I was on like number four or five. and Then somebody told me what it was. and and I was too much because I was already bragging about the fucking taste of them.
04:24:06
Speaker
so I couldn't be like, oh, this is disgusting. Stop dropping comments down, Brittany. Fucking eating a rest, motherfucker. I know you are. Deep-throat in balls.
04:24:17
Speaker
pop and you're hot right and you're not And you're not wrong, my dog. Rocky Mountain oysters are good. They are bull balls. man Robert Platinum always got my back.
04:24:30
Speaker
I'm not speaking out of turn. I'm not being racist. Soul food. Came from the slaves. She said you will not kiss me if you eat that.
04:24:42
Speaker
i went back oh that so well baby i don't I don't have nobody to cook me chitlins no more and I don't know how to cook them and I won't ever attempt to cook them.
04:24:54
Speaker
He's sticking with the testicles. mean i don't got I got no nobody going to cook me
Social Media Antics
04:25:00
Speaker
Rocky Mountain oysters and ain't nobody going to cook me chitlins unless Robert Platinum hooked me up with a chitlin. I'll fucking swallow some balls but you're not putting intestines in my mouth.
04:25:10
Speaker
ah yes ah Welcome back, Jedi. What's going on, Jedi? Nice little nap. I should have stayed John longer, okay? I don't... Dude, what are you talking about? You're talking about eating fucking, like, rotten brains and shit with Drew on stream. like Like, you guys are never gonna fucking do that, but...
04:25:31
Speaker
yeah what were the brains you guys are gonna eat pig brains or some shit i i i did he has a whole video no you didn't he touched it with your tongue and spit that out and it went three hours in your backyard it was spaghetti you didn't you didn't eat it hope you guys have a great night yeah i took one bite and that was good night good night good night we love you Love you, girl. and i Who's out? You look you leaving, Britt?
04:26:03
Speaker
I'm beautiful. There's shadow. Have a girl. you me like No, You need not leave. are zoom is tell me so leave and i leave You We'll be quiet. Talk.
04:26:19
Speaker
tell i'm out again later go but love you girl but love hate you if brittany's leaving i'm leaving goodbye There we go.
04:26:34
Speaker
should you Well, Blazer's leaving. Blazer's leaving. I guess I'll stay. All Chitlins are considered a part of soul food. I love fucking soul food.
04:26:48
Speaker
I love me some soul food, man. Yeah, soul food's Y'all put testicles in your mouth? Why do Robert Culler asses out?
04:26:59
Speaker
Y'all put testicles in your mouth, but you won't put intestines in your mouth? Bitches. okay nice Sorry, sorry. Sorry, Scotto.
04:27:10
Speaker
By the way, do you know who hates soul food? Gingers. That's because I'm a blonde. So here we are. It's so fun to eat your own soul. there it Listen, you don't know what Ginger likes to eat. She never told you.
04:27:28
Speaker
So, Jim, did you like the pig brains? No. girl oh You should play your little video for him, Jedi.
04:27:41
Speaker
Go ahead. You should play the video. Drew has the video. I don't have the video. Oh, Scotto has it. you got na and then You can play Scotto. Scotto's like the fucking Library Congress. That motherfucker's got everything, man. was going to say, Scotto's got everything. Scotto's got shit from the internet before the internet was fucking real.
04:28:02
Speaker
i don't know he like do i and you so did I don't even know if it's make it to the shit process I might throw it right back up.
04:28:13
Speaker
<unk> not That's not Jedi that's some dude with bunch of tattoos inspiration for why we did it
04:28:22
Speaker
by the way scotto can you send me to but yeah i ask betu but he sends it that's not jedi that's some du with the mu a tattoo no that this is little the inspiration for why we did it Wait, is that is that the dude that fucking killed himself? catch all you in a little I see it. I'm more hungry than I want to see it right now.
04:28:41
Speaker
you been and maning show women this wait we wait for this is when they used to have a goie i yeah um i want i want to see it i just i'm more hungry than i want to see it right now no man Yeah, you don't want to see this if you're youre about to eat. You got to just... to... we... how do we how do we ah yeah I'm opening the can right now.
04:29:07
Speaker
Okay. I'm fucking scared. Wait, what did you do? Buy can of fucking... feel like need to... You bought a can of fucking pig brains? hi Oh, it's already pungent. No.
04:29:19
Speaker
Oh, for fuck sake. No.
04:29:24
Speaker
yeah oh through fuck sake no yeah I'm going to vomit for you. No, hold on. hold let me Let me get the fucking shit one more bottom for um it looks like get it out you're get wrong and you got to come away dog got oh stinks so fucking no this is so much worse than i was expecting i guess i can smell it through the camera that ain't spam motherfucker yeah
04:30:06
Speaker
plug your nose you won teach the thing and so so stinky yeah you that um like cleveland Cleveland's on panel like this shit's
04:30:24
Speaker
it's like yeah potatoes almost
04:30:31
Speaker
guys shit i just like know i better be your best friend for life You are? Watch how fast this motherfucker runs.
04:30:50
Speaker
me take yeah no it What was the pig thinking? With that first taste, you should be able to tell me what the pig was thinking.
04:31:01
Speaker
That's the same thing Scott who did the first time he looked a pussy. Get that shit out in the room. i gotta I'm going to throw this outside right now.
04:31:12
Speaker
It stinks so fucking hot. didn't even eat them, man. You didn't even eat it. Come on, man. It was nasty as fuck, dude. It was...
04:31:25
Speaker
Okay, so now so in the video that we watched that Drew was playing, like there was like big chunks of brain and stuff. This whole thing was just like it was like soup. i and then there were like ah why did you umm It's just weird that your local
Cultural Identity Jokes
04:31:40
Speaker
grocery store sells cans of pig brains. No, they don't. they don't I ordered that off Amazon.
04:31:45
Speaker
um But it was the exact same brand, the same thing that the dude did in the video. Thanks, Jeff. Thanks, guys, though. Dude. And so, so anyway, it was not anywhere close to the video that drew is playing. Cause we watched, okay. So drew had a long stream about like this guy eating all this nasty shit and the pork brains or whatever.
04:32:05
Speaker
But like in the video, he opened the exact same brand. I literally got the exact same shit he did. And, but like it was soup and it was fucking gross. It was like, and it stunk real bad. Like it smelled like it was, it was like eating a corpse.
04:32:23
Speaker
but yeah it was Maybe they have different um like crunchy smooth. No, no, no. Literally, there's okay there's a two pack. oh so i ordered ah You can only get it in like packs of two. So I literally have another can of shit in my pantry. yeah Open it now. Taste it. Prove it. i i could I could do it on here, but I'm not going to.
04:32:45
Speaker
He's like, I could. But he saved it because he's like, just in case I ever need to eat it. You know what? Pull that shit out at like the next Christmas party with the family. It might come in handy someday.
04:32:57
Speaker
Hey, feed it feed it to some unwilling guests and see if they like it. Right? See if one of your kids have one of those food drive things where they drink cans of food. No, that's what I... Oh, my God. That's suck and evil. I'm donating this to homeless people. They can eat grains.
04:33:12
Speaker
but yeah Oh, my God. Change it. Put a fake label on it. Right? Shama sounds like you're fucking big brains right now, man. know what do you use Yes, sir. I mean, some brains and shit ones. He's probably eating a fucking Reese's peanut butter cup.
04:33:30
Speaker
Do you have a slight? I mean, some mom, he don't know what his mouth long enough. i Yeah, no, yeah you fucking didn't actually you didn't actually eat it.
04:33:45
Speaker
yes i did well enough I put it in my mouth, I spit half of it out. and You didn't swallow. I did part of it.
04:33:55
Speaker
That's what she said. So what did your backyard let smell like for days after you used that shit out in the grass? No, okay, so I have a bunch of feral cats and they fucking devoured it. Oh my God.
04:34:07
Speaker
Literally, I went outside next day and the can was clean as a whistle. That's like when you watch dogs eat cat shit and and people do like let them muzzle up and lick their fucking mouths and our whistles Are whistles really known for being like sterile and clean?
04:34:30
Speaker
yeah yeah What? Whistles? Flowrider said blow my whistle. yeah
04:34:39
Speaker
there's There's a whistle. like Why is that the standard?
04:34:45
Speaker
and What the fuck are you talking about, man? I'm lost. not pussy. Like a feline.
04:34:54
Speaker
would you ever eat a cat ya i do cat i eat cat a cat fried right cat not pussy um like a feline You guys want to hear a disgusting story?
04:35:07
Speaker
This is disgusting, man. i wasn't The first time I went to the fucking Philippines, this fucking gunnery sergeant that I worked with like was married to a Filipino woman who was like highly connected out in like the community and shit.
04:35:20
Speaker
and he was like He asked he ask i got three or four of us sergeants, he's like, hey, you guys want to go experience something you'll never ever fucking experience again in your life? and Of course, we're like, fuck yeah.
04:35:31
Speaker
Takes us to this like exclusive this house that has this exclusive back room to it and shit, right? And we sit down, and there's a round fucking table that has holes cut out in it, right? Like, all around the fucking table. And you sit in front of the fucking... You sit in front of the the hole, right?
04:35:47
Speaker
Yeah, yeah, yeah. I've seen this. Yeah, I mean, do you want me to tell it? Because i don't want to get your fan of trouble. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. So, they... So what they have done prior to this, and this is a delicacy in the Philippines, right? This wasn't just like animal cruelty.
04:36:02
Speaker
This is a fucking delicacy to them. listen no they They cut the top part of the scalp off of a fucking monkey. And the monkey's still fucking alive. Fully fucking alive, right? That's an Indiana Jones movie. They put it up. They put the the fucking skull in that hole in the table.
04:36:17
Speaker
and tighten some clamps down to hold that shit in place. And then motherfuckers sit around the table and sit there and, like, pick the brain out and fucking eat it. And these monkeys are fucking screaming the whole fucking time underneath the fucking table. so Like, flailing their fucking arms and legs. And it was fucking... monkey brain It was fucking terrible, dude. Like, I felt so fucking bad, man.
04:36:37
Speaker
I will say you had a mild experience because... The videos I've seen with this, the actual experiences, they put these monkeys in their stable and clamp them down and stuff like that.
04:36:52
Speaker
And then everybody at the table sitting down, they give them these like, like when you eat like, like crab legs or or lobsters, they they give you those little mallets. They give people mallets and they literally, while this monkey's alive, they crack its fucking skull. no. Yeah. Yeah. We didn't do that shit. Yeah.
04:37:08
Speaker
yeah Yeah, we didn't do that shit. like the The top of the skull was already fucking cut off, man. it was good It was rough. ain't even gonna lie, man. it was fun I've seen some shit in my day, man, and that was fucking rough, man. But everybody everybody everybody felt obliged to fucking do it because like we got invited to go do this shit. and it's like Did you try them? Yeah, yeah, yeah. Yeah, we did. That was the brain.
04:37:34
Speaker
It was fucking disgusting. It was disgusting. Ladies and gentlemen, But you know how many things are overseas that are considered delicacies that back in the Western world were like, that's fucking sick, man.
04:37:44
Speaker
Yeah, it's normal over there. It is. Over here, it's not so much. No, I've had, I've, um, yes, yes, Kayla. You know, we are ridiculous, baby. But yeah, I've eaten like monkey on a stick and shit, like walking down the streets of the Philippines and everything else. Yeah.
04:38:01
Speaker
And I ain't gonna lie, it's it's the cliche fucking thing of like, it tastes a lot like chicken. Well, that's what like chimpanzees, what you know, they need is soass eat them like while they're alive. they can' your johnny bunngs i see you. on. alive. worry about him. ah First and foremost, Robert Platinum.
04:38:23
Speaker
Some hot sauce. This is what's wrong with you people. You can't just put hot sauce on everything to make it better. Stop it. No, you got to put ranch in hot sauce. Yeah, has is they need ran ran I you sauce. You don't have the flip side of the coin.
04:38:38
Speaker
That's what's wrong with white people. They want to put ranch on everything. Ranch in hot sauce. Don't deal. Some people are like, don't taste good. White people are like, don't taste good. right Ranch. Lick forgets he's one of us.
04:38:53
Speaker
I'm not white. He pulled his black card out earlier. He didn't put it away Well, it was a forgery, so it doesn't matter. Hold ladies and gentlemen. Ladies and gentlemen, if I may have the floor for just one second.
04:39:10
Speaker
I got to welcome our next guest. I got i gotta i gotta to properly welcome our next guest. Johnny Ball. don't know where he's been all night. I haven't seen this in forever. That's why asked multiple times because anybody heard from him for a long time. I haven't seen him in forever, but the one and only.
04:39:27
Speaker
Johnny's back. but um but no bad Johnny What's up, Good to see
04:39:38
Speaker
what so fidel see y none watch i go but what's the weather i like this time of year a ah shitty and the taxes are high The taxes are high. Not by coincidence, but I got to head out. night, Shaman. Take care, Shaman. Good night, Shaman.
04:39:59
Speaker
Love you, brother. Take care, man. Take care, bro. Robert Flander.
04:40:04
Speaker
take careman yeah rubb plan what it was one of ah I'm an brother. am appropriating everything.
04:40:24
Speaker
Come on now.
04:40:29
Speaker
i his wild face like what are you appropating our culture and am i am appropriate sometimes just want to be one now Like black beard wrinkles
04:40:48
Speaker
so that's what youre saying it's like yeah and you be bye black with the beard with the voice well no cracking no wrinkles ah but gave the fuck no wrinkles but around yeah black don't crack i'm um um i got i got the wrinksles i'm getting old
04:41:09
Speaker
yep Oh, that's some bullshit. Black does crack. oh i'm a brother I'm a brother in disguise, motherfuckers. You heard of Shea Butter, motherfucker? like is the sa um um the ga I'm the I'm the dude playing the dude. What the fuck you been up to, Johnny?
04:41:32
Speaker
Shit, I've been getting desk work done. Fucking sister came up from Florida, and since she did, we've been busy as shit. Nice. What do you mean, desk work? What's that mean? ah Tattoo design. Shit like that, working on progress health.
04:41:47
Speaker
Oh, okay. Cool. Hell yeah.
04:41:52
Speaker
Glick wants a tattoo of Scott's dick on his forearm. Can you hook him up? Uh... Well, to get the whole curvature and the details I'm about explain. To get all that down is going to take some time. Scott said it's going to go from the elbow to the wrist.
04:42:07
Speaker
so Yeah, I might as well just down fucking legs. There's going to be some details to work with. ankle to the thigh. This might be like an eight ten hour tattoo, just saying. It's going to be a very detailed process. Multiple sessions.
04:42:27
Speaker
See? I don't know what's up. Your forearm might just get stiff at times when you don't realize it. What's up, Rex? There's things you can do for that.
04:42:41
Speaker
Cockwork. Oh, shit. Cockwork. How the fuck have you been? I ain't seen you in forever, bro. What up, Rex? o Rex, good to see you. Rex, I got a question, man. Do you have a song for that?
04:42:57
Speaker
for a dick tattooed arm I sent Rex an invite to a rather hopping discord server and yesterday in the afternoon I see him hanging out in BC singing shit like Eagles or Metallica stuff that'll get him struck on YouTube but he's just having the time of his life just karaoke for everybody else because she
04:43:22
Speaker
what up Rex get up here man yeah Rex get up here i you put this rather hilling yeah That's the warmest invite I've ever heard. Get up here, you fucking slut.
04:43:35
Speaker
Get your slut ass up here, man. Get your fucking whore ass up here. It's fucking pinned. It's not hard to find. Don't be a bitch, Clockwork.
04:43:47
Speaker
Don't be a biatch. Don't be such a Fidel Bongs. don't we such don't be such a fidel bos Oh Look I had things that Came in the way That was That was a very convincing statement that didn you Look guys I had Well fuck I wish had things that came in the way Came Well literally and figuratively okay Ooh Johnny Bong's got some What's up I mean some pussy I don't know
04:44:24
Speaker
Look, there's hobbies, eh? yeah da it's I mean, we all have hobbies.
04:44:33
Speaker
One of my favorite hobbies is Jedi's mom. Oh, wait, Jedi's not even here anymore. Where the fuck Jedi go?
04:44:42
Speaker
don't know.
04:44:46
Speaker
Like a turd on Metamucil, he just slid the fuck out. He's just slid.
04:44:54
Speaker
He opened up fucking can of testing. He's fucking devouring that shit. I think he's going to go eat somewhere. yeah He's in the pantry digging that other can out. I think he wanted to go eat up some can-o pig brains.
04:45:06
Speaker
If you're going to eat pig brains, you've got to eat them fresh. You can't eat them out of a can that you ordered from Amazon and it took a week to get there. You've got to eat them fresh. You've got to sit around a table that's got holes in it. Well, no. i mean My experience with that was not...
04:45:23
Speaker
necessarily a table with holes in it but it was sometimes slaughtering we're we're slaughtering this pig and this
04:45:33
Speaker
is a delicacy so yeah cut it open it pull it cut it little open fire a little twist turn twist turn twist turn eat and i mean don That's just it, man. we Being stationed in the Philippines and Korea and Japan, I've i've eaten so much weird-ass fucking shit. i'll eat any I'll try anything once, man. I love trying all kinds of stuff.
04:46:03
Speaker
The next crazy shit that Jedi and um Drew were going to do was Balut. Remember that? they stopp I know. Yeah, I'm the one that brought it up to them because I was telling them about how I ate fucking Balut in the Philippines.
04:46:14
Speaker
nasty fucking shit. What's going on with you, Rex? What up, Rex? I decided to join while y'all talking about killing and eating shit. Okay, fair enough. There you go. yeah
04:46:28
Speaker
But no, I've actually slaughtered pigs with my great-grandfather back in the day. They take the bladder, blow tie the ends of it off, blow it up, and use it as a football. Yeah.
04:46:39
Speaker
Yeah. I knew Clockwork was going to come up here. It's been a hot minute since we hung out together. Oh, yeah. I've been busy, man. I've been yeah harvesting pumpkins for Halloween and Thanksgiving and Christmas and all that good shit so so so like you say yeah oh shit. the block ter yeah yeah harvard Like said, I've done the pig slaughtering.
04:47:02
Speaker
It's not that rare that you you're slaughtering that pig and you're doing everything and you cut the hat Cut the head off. Cut you some slices of brain out. You got your open fire, your little flip-flop, flip-flop, and you eat it.
04:47:17
Speaker
Well, i like to I like to fry mine up a little bit. But yeah, fresh. great Fresh. A little butter, a little salt. Yeah.
04:47:27
Speaker
I'm a note of pig bladders. Artists in the 1800s would mix their paints and they would be stored in pig bladders. so no no That the only kind of container they had. Yeah.
04:47:38
Speaker
Yeah, back in the day, you used all the pig. You didn't just eat the ham pocket. everything. Yeah, my man, you can hear by his accent. My man knows what... yeah yeah iin't I ain't talking bullshit.
04:47:51
Speaker
Yeah, I'm guessing pigs aren't the only things that Rex is slaughtered. We'll talk about that on this one. Yeah, we'll talk about that on this one. I mean... What's happening? I've done cattle, I've done chickens.
04:48:08
Speaker
Oh, hey, a chicken is funny as fuck. You cut its head off and it'll just run around for about 10 minutes. Talk work. You ever done the... you ever done the You know... That's how I know how to do it. Yeah. Take that chicken. Come up from behind and grab it and just...
04:48:29
Speaker
come up from behind and grab it and just Hit him with that and just let him flop around for a couple minutes. Wait, are you talking about are you talking about snakes or are you talking about chickens? Either way. That's the same way can kill snake. as You can do it on both of them. I'm a fan of doing the little butchery knife.
04:48:50
Speaker
Twist and jerk. Gotta get a little rubik. You come up behind that chicken and give him a little What's up? everything nothing to Nothing to worry about. and yet Snatch them and you hit them.
04:49:07
Speaker
Two quick moves. I wouldn't have believed it. I heard stories about my grandfather using black snakes like a whip and he'd whip them so hard their head would fly off.
04:49:18
Speaker
That's what I was talking about. yeah yeah I wouldn't have believed it if I hadn't seen him do it. He fucking snatched one up out the yard and whacked. It's on the wrist, man. It's on the wrist.
04:49:28
Speaker
Yeah. Rat snake. Get him with that rat. Yeah. Oh, yeah. ah self again I've seen my buddy's grandfather do that. If I could snatch a rat snake up out the barn and at the same time crack a horse right in the ass with it and get the horse out of wherever the fuck it was.
04:49:50
Speaker
yeah Well, cheers to the twist and jerk, man. Cheers. Cheers. hey Country folk is coming out
04:50:09
Speaker
yes
04:50:12
Speaker
jersey du passed out on me robbing yeah um they just fucking du oh
04:50:23
Speaker
But yeah, in the pumpkin patch, I ain't seen the great pumpkin yet, but I've seen a couple of eight-foot black snakes in there. Yeah, so I just let them be. ah I wasn't going snatch them up.
04:50:34
Speaker
Uh-uh. So are you help are you helping somebody like harvest the pumpkins, or do you have a pumpkin patch? No, I'm helping. they These are like football-feel sized pumpkin patches. Oh, really? Okay. Yeah, so...
04:50:45
Speaker
We've got all the big ones, like the medium-ish little ones. and Yeah, that's what's left. We get you last. I want one of them pumpkins that you can might get down into. Like them huge ones.
04:50:59
Speaker
oh we also we we haven't We haven't entered the kink part of the show yet. I got a penchant for pumpkins and apple pie. hold on a pumpkinna and but yeah i got to pinch it for pumpkins and apple pie on we we like We've got this little baby gourd right here.
04:51:22
Speaker
think this is perfect for you. This might be the right side, Hoss. He's like, nah, I blow the back out of that motherfucker. That's the only thing, Hoss, is blowing the out of. You're growing that fro back out, man. I like it. Oh, yeah.
04:51:35
Speaker
no ginger um actually there were actually ill over that i growing it get in growing a f throw back out man i like it yeah About another six months it'll be. yeah yeah did I told you the first time I saw you on panel, you reminded me of my brother, right? Because my brother was a white boy, but he had a fucking afro.
04:52:00
Speaker
Don't know where the hell that came from, but you know, there's one woodshed in every family, I guess. That's a Jew, bro. you know ah Yeah, he had a straight up fucking afro and shit, dude.
04:52:11
Speaker
when you're white and you got one of those those Jew for you got Jew in your family yeah shit my family's a mutt man we got a little bit of everything my dad's got a Jew for my pops has got a Jew for him man as he's got like a straight ass if he grows his shit out like it's like boom like just perfect pick that shit out oh i can go ahead go ahead go ahead Tyrone he'd work that shit he'd walk around with the pig stuck up in it and shit you know like Dave, you know you're not black, right?
04:52:44
Speaker
Hey, you know what? Just because our skin tone says one thing, don't mean this. Robert knows what I'm talking about. I'm black. Got the melanoma coming out or whatever.
04:52:55
Speaker
Oh, yeah. Robert knows what I'm talking about. I'm black as shit. No, you're not. Angel's like bullshit.
04:53:08
Speaker
Yeah. If you're black, I'm Michael Jackson. I mean, might be white as shit, but I got black tendencies. No, you don't.
04:53:21
Speaker
ah black tendies now no you don' oh I mean, you can say that all you want. So many jokes there could have been made. yeah right thing i would i will i will digress, though. have black feet the thing The one thing about me that I wish was black enough, I wish I had this much black meat that I would have went and gotten milk and never came back home.
04:53:43
Speaker
Because fuck them kids. Fuck them kids, man. but put Douches. Papa's got to go get... Papa was a Rolling Stone, man.
04:53:56
Speaker
When does it dan go roll stone
04:54:01
Speaker
a dad joke become a dad joke?
04:54:06
Speaker
When he goes for milk and doesn't come back. I was waiting. i was trying to I was trying to do that math. When you met Blake. When you met Blake.
04:54:17
Speaker
Looks like the dad ain't daddin'. The dad ain't daddin'. Look, I'm a good goddamn dad. I know my fucking oldest daughter. What's up, Megan? Oh, hey, Megan.
04:54:29
Speaker
but i um mes bank what's up megan man yeah i't m bla hey wait Shut up, Sean. Shut up, Fennell.
04:54:42
Speaker
That's some AI shit. That You look like you're about 12 in that picture, dude. Hey, you said it. Oh, shit.
04:54:54
Speaker
um you know you look like you're about twelve in that picture dude i you said
04:55:07
Speaker
oh shit Holy fuck, I'm going to sell it. You have your brains reconnected together. My brain's not functioning.
04:55:21
Speaker
my I'm sorry, my brain's not functioning. I got a brain malfunction after I'm reading a message. Wait, hold on a second.
04:55:33
Speaker
I'm not going to speak. You're okay. Suck it, Seattle. Suck it, Seattle. Nobody likes your bitch asses.
04:55:45
Speaker
No condolences. What the fuck?
04:55:49
Speaker
Oh, she said the Marine. Come on. Mariners. nothing them Mariners. Oh, excuse me. Mariners. You got a buffer. now My brain is still trying to buffer. They're trying. I'm not firing.
04:56:04
Speaker
I never said I was firing on all cylinders here. Okay. because there are You know what, Rex? All cylinders are overrated, man. Oh, well, fair enough.
04:56:16
Speaker
I said I wasn't going to get drunk tonight. he's putting on the Steelers. oh Oh, my God. Kick that motherfucker off, panel. Yeah. It was all good to today, shit, Hoss. What did you do, Hoss?
04:56:35
Speaker
My bitch. Hey, Hoss, tell us you like to touch little boys without telling us you like to touch little boys. Yeah, damn Oh, it's fucking brother and he wait he's finally joining father joining the party come on i've been waiting to come on with you guys and i want i' sure even when to come on
04:57:08
Speaker
Bradley, why didn't that come on earlier, bro? You've been so good lately. And you know i'm you know i'm the I'm the first one to put you in your place. I'm the first one to drag your ass. Hang on, hang on, hang on real quick, real quick. Don't bullshit me.
04:57:23
Speaker
Real quick, Robert, have a good night, man. He's been active in the chat all night and shit, man. so you Have a good night, brother. I love you, brother. Have a good night. i appreciate you, man. I need to get you, you need to get up on this panel on one night with us. so You know I love you, man. Cheers to you.
04:57:38
Speaker
ah Cheers. Later, bro. I was looking for you guys, and at first you guys weren't an open panel, so I couldn't join. And then I did a carry-off. It's been an open panel all night, dude.
04:57:50
Speaker
i one I don't know. When it first came out... Don't give that shit. I'm not saying. Go back and try to find it. but then jeni more so Go back find and brit brittany was sad cause you weren't up here man There was a karaoke show. I do a karaoke show with my friends, so I was doing that for a while.
04:58:09
Speaker
you was see yeah So that's the reason. yeah yeah Sing me a fucking song, Puppet. Sing me a song, Puppet. Dance, monkey dance. Sing me a song.
04:58:22
Speaker
um I just want to say I will sing you a song but can I can i apologize i just want to apologize last time I was on I was very drunk which I am right now but I still wanted to apologize for being too drunk kicking the fuck out say yeah hold on your song last week was pretty good Hold on second. Can you guys enlighten me on what happened? Because I haven't been here for the last couple weeks. before i drag I don't know what he's talking about, man. He got drunk. He's been good. Here, I cleared up. He's been good. He's been fun. He's been funny.
04:58:59
Speaker
He got drunk and he started bringing out the chicken props and shit again, man. Oh, damn. We did a couple of times. We asked him to. We asked him to. No problem. But no. I mean, he fucking did karaoke and he fucking sang and played guitar or whatever it was and it was actually fucking really good.
04:59:14
Speaker
and No, I wasn't good. I was really And I didn't do anything bad. I'm just saying I was i was too drunk. yeah Okay, well, I had to, i had to because i know a lot of I know everybody's been here, though. I've been off i've been gone the last couple weeks, but before even before I left, Bradley, you've been good. You've been good, man.
04:59:33
Speaker
yeah you got you got I didn't anything bad, but I was great. I just wanted to make sure I brought you up tonight, and I wanted to make sure, like, Something didn't happen, so that's why I asked the panel.
04:59:48
Speaker
I don't think anything happened. I was the only one here. I wasn't inappropriate. I was okay. But I still want to say was too drunk and I apologize for that. Get the fuck over it. Don't be that way next time. There's no apologizing for being too drunk on panels. That was a fucking lazy Jedi and Shaman show. It was fucking intoxicated.
05:00:10
Speaker
did i in so show was getting toatedated right right Do you know Elsie? I mean, have you seen one of his shows?
05:00:21
Speaker
Right, Scotto? How drunk is too drunk? I got it. I'm sober again. Yay, me. Listen. Listen.
05:00:36
Speaker
I love you guys. This is great. i'm so I'm just saying. So what what karaoke show were you on, man? um a Tattooed Angel. I've seen her. okay yeah Oh, I know Tattooed Angel.
05:00:51
Speaker
I've been doing her show for a while, for quite a while, so I felt obligated to be on her show. So what, does she do ah karaoke every Saturday night? Yes, she does, and and sometimes Fridays. the This Friday, she didn't show up. so Well, it's it's been fun hanging out with you, Glick. I'm going to miss you, man.
05:01:09
Speaker
He's different for night. He's different.
05:01:13
Speaker
He's contacted his new baby girl. I to say fuck Jedi for disappearing and not even saying bye to anybody. You know what? that ra ke I like mo and i am miss Jedi. Punk ass bitch. Yeah, you did.
05:01:27
Speaker
Mr. Default character. At least you're not like flash blinded right now because he came on camera or whatever. A little retina burn?
05:01:39
Speaker
Yeah, little bit. Rub some dirt on me, it'll be okay. A little duct tape. I like that. ah that's nice to know yeah if ifs If it moves and it's not supposed to, if it's supposed to move and it doesn't, WD-4. There you go. yeah There you go.
05:01:59
Speaker
If it I can duct tape as it ties. Handyman's secret weapon. don't
05:02:09
Speaker
ah johnny Johnny, what anime are you drawing? Are you drawing hentai, man? What are you I am drawing Bujin and Rajin from Shinto Buddhism.
05:02:21
Speaker
Wow. nice Nice. You're always you're always on something Japanese, aren't you? Yeah, that's been my latest study here for the past year. Yeah.
05:02:33
Speaker
That's cool. I've seen people on the back of it in a Twitter for like a year and a half. Hmm? yeah you I said your work's impressive, man. yeah I appreciate that because I'm still getting the line work and style of it down.
05:02:47
Speaker
yeah I haven't seen it. kind Is there any way for me to see it? yeah like to see it I have unfinished pieces that are taking me like up to a year to get done.
05:03:01
Speaker
I don't want to see anything you don't want to show. and You just finished it together, Johnny Bones, because I got arms and stuff that need to be finished. Arms?
05:03:12
Speaker
Johnny's over here Lolly fucking around. That piece is going to take me a fucking while. That shit's photorealistic. I'm trying to get Johnny to stop fucking lollygagging around so he can start tattooing. The hard part is getting the veins right.
05:03:30
Speaker
so Is there duct tape on your head? Is there duct tape on your hand? Maybe. The handyman secret weapon duct tape. So, these are practices. When I say practices, I mean i have different mouths done.
05:03:45
Speaker
i have different limbs done. i have... Trying to practice proportions on mid-section. Click, that's your ball sack. Yeah, that looked like a ball sack. What did you pose for that? I have i have like bits and pieces of stuff getting done. alltogether where' Where's that one of you? It was like almost full page. It was like all different colors and shit.
05:04:15
Speaker
Oh, that was fucking gorgeous. You know what I'm talking about? With the reds and whatever else? Yeah, it was like reds and blues and purples. And I'll get back to y'all on that one. Yeah, that one was cool as hell.
05:04:26
Speaker
Fidel Balms over here.
05:04:31
Speaker
Speaking of, I want him to stop but fucking lolly dicking around and and and get ready to tattoo because I would love for Johnny to start tattooing me.
05:04:46
Speaker
Hmm. Like finishing out my arms, doing my doing my chest, doing my back. like I want Johnny to do it, but he's... You still got those hands on your back, right? here ad juive thing They're on my shoulders, first and foremost.
05:05:04
Speaker
it's It's a blueprint. Place hands here. Right across my neck. For when you go to prison shit. and then and then there's for when you go to prison and shit Or do I go oh and go to the Marine base?
05:05:19
Speaker
are There you yeah Both work. i'm yeah and arrow and I have an arrow on my belly that says your favorite crown right here. It points down to my dick.
05:05:31
Speaker
And it's tattooed all purple and shit. yeah i like jedi said The reason why he left is because the AirPods died. Which is funny because can't score every fucking time I see him playing a life show. So the reason Jedi left is because he's a bitch.
05:05:45
Speaker
Yeah, whatever, Jedi. His AirPods died, but he always has the fucking old ones that connect to the phone. don't know how they died, but here we are. So he wanted to let you guys know that's why he's not here.
05:05:57
Speaker
Speaking of language, Angel just dropping all the tea, man. Jedi's a bitch. I'm too wasted. I'm getting out of here too. so Have a good night, you guys. have come here bradley ah fucking dare you. anywhere. not going anywhere. a you're not going and all right bread and all seriousness when's the last time you were on a panel and
05:06:28
Speaker
people were begging you not to leave Never. Ever. ah Also, Bradley, the only person that's begging you not to leave is me. So... Never. It's never. I don't know any time. Cliff's just trying to get the watch hours up, man.
05:06:43
Speaker
You ever see that scene in Wayne's World? I'm going. Good, man. Go. I'm going. The guy who was like, I'm not going to get drunk tonight. I'm going to behave myself.
05:06:57
Speaker
As I'm getting ready to order more beer. That's why he wants him to stay. It's because they got the same fucking brainwaves. Then he was threatening to beat the door dash driver's ass if he get there with the next six minutes or some shit.
05:07:10
Speaker
I'm fucked up. This motherfucker's got six minutes get my goddamn beer here. hi Bradley, honey, if you need to leave, you can go ahead and leave. so i might don't want to like oh you got to go If you go man, it's all good. you leave, but don't feel like don't feel like you are not welcomed here as sorry you like and fuck up very cool i understand They don't ever feel like that.
05:07:36
Speaker
No. yeah Hold my beer. I'm welcome. and he got better. And he's been a great guest. He redeemed himself. He redeemed himself.
05:07:47
Speaker
and then he came back and he got better and he's been a great book and he's been a great guest or he redeemed himself yeah he love that again Thank you so Yeah, Bradley, you're due you're due for a good fuck up, man.
05:08:04
Speaker
Don't go. At the end of the day, I have the only thing to say. I am getting too drunk. I just want to say thank you so much, and you guys have a good night.
05:08:15
Speaker
Take care, man. Later, Tater.
05:08:19
Speaker
yeah later light or tighter <unk> Thank God that motherfucker left. No, I'm joking.
05:08:31
Speaker
I'm joking, Bradley. We're stuck with fucking Bradley's fucking mongoloid special needs brother. You? We know. No, Haas. Hey, damn.
05:08:42
Speaker
Haas, are you a mongoloid? No, I'm not no fucking mongoloid. Well, that's good. Haas is like, I like french fries on titers. Johnny, did you get distracted, man?
05:08:54
Speaker
Or did you find the other one? ah yeah I've got a heap of fucking papers sitting around here. It's all good. Don't worry about it, man. It's all good. All the last finals that I'm working on tonight, so I should be able to show you all when they get done. I don't want you sicking your regime on me or anything, man. yeah but Hell no.
05:09:16
Speaker
Hey, Glick. Sometimes. Glick's busy sexting. I'm not going to have face mask. Put me in the front part so they can see your fucking mug.
05:09:29
Speaker
oh What? what I ain't showing my face. Put me in the front above the fucking time whatever else so nothing fucking blocks your face. I mean, I get that for us because we're on the panel.
05:09:42
Speaker
There you go. Like that? Nobody wants to see my face. I'm trying That is true. it your fucking dick, Blake. Yeah. don't say it Don't say the quiet words out loud, Lick.
05:09:54
Speaker
Titties! no no no no No, no, no, no, no. I'm trying to... Uh-huh. Yeah, we know what you're trying to do.
05:10:05
Speaker
I'm trying to order fucking beat on DoorDash. See? See? Oh, God. Motherfucker's got six minutes. Six fucking minutes. Apparently, we're going for an after party, you guys.
05:10:16
Speaker
No, we're not doing an after party, but... no i know i Yeah, totally. Totally.
05:10:22
Speaker
See, John's on board. Let's go. After party. One more, or, 50 more minutes. After party. Angel, fuck are you talking about? You just got here like 32 minutes ago, man. Shut up. I was here in the beginning, motherfucker.
05:10:35
Speaker
And I left because my booty cell fucking called. Oh, we got your booty called. Yeah, she left because her phone died. She had to make it to those cheeks clapped and shit, man. I got talking to my ex. got talking to my ex.
05:10:51
Speaker
your ex yeah i'm gonna sleep with somebody i don't fucking know i'll probably do it next time i didn't do it this time hey rex said i didn't do it this time i got a song for that random fucking bro like i don't do anything you mean you have a life outside of youtube what hey what but no Nowadays, people could be like somebody else I fucking know that has got somebody new on their fucking dick in fucking two weeks.
05:11:25
Speaker
Y'all, y'all, y'all, y'all, y'all
05:11:35
Speaker
um and concerned about you on click like like come on come like like you get new girlfriends like prostitutes good s scabs come on me see i don't want to know that I'm just happy I'm on top of a round of applause tonight. That's good got it. Don't get too mad. Don't
05:12:05
Speaker
Keep it going. Nah, started asking what that all about, but in never mind. Hopefully this one probably works out. is really fucking pretty. Who? Who?
05:12:15
Speaker
Oh, let's see her. Let's see picture. Since she's not up here. won't care. She won't care. Baby, are you still watching? Are you still awake? She's question. Blonde. a guys baby don she she won't care she won't care baby are you still watching are you still awake ah he like some she's lurking um ah one question <unk> Come on, madam. Tell him it's okay.
05:12:46
Speaker
What's that? Tell him he's a good boy. yeah Well, first and foremost, she's local. Second of all, we've been talking for a hot-ass minute. She's local. We've been talking for a hot-ass minute. oh and in in I'm sorry that you guys fell into the wormhole of the whole Brandy situation. No, no, no.
05:13:09
Speaker
Hold on a second. and and a hol I'm sorry you guys fell into that, but there a method to madness. We got that. No, no, no, no, no. was there was a method to my madness we were push in your good we got that no no no no no no no no no No, no. I love when a motherfucker tries to make it sound like he had a plan and shit. No, no, no. know I really did. I really did. And I don't know I'm drinking right now and and and whatnot.
05:13:42
Speaker
I know you guys want to hear because we're all drinking right now. said But at the of the day... Hey, motherfucker. I haven't cut the sip. I mean, at the end of the day, I really did. And you know what? And you know what?
05:13:53
Speaker
Stupid bitch sent me like $1,000. And now her little five foot something ass husband little cuck bastard can't get his little two inch dick up unless some other dude is fucking her is going on all my social media on all my social media and trying to be like when you go send that one let me let me let me jump in as your friend let me jump in as your friend shut up you don't need to share everything on the internet
05:14:25
Speaker
I don't mind sharing that shit. I don't mind sharing that shit because i never asked her for money. That stupid ass tried to send me money. and And then I understood why i only got pictures from here up because that bitch is built like a fucking NFL lineman.
05:14:39
Speaker
I don't know why that was so fucking funny. That's a bitch. Bitch plays for my Browns, god damn it. I made a thousand bucks.
05:14:50
Speaker
I got a thousand dollars out of it. That was good. was like a little bit Yeah, I looked a little bit stupid. I almost made a thousand dollars. I looked a little bit stupid. oh Well, Kayla's in the chat. She said she's here, but don't do anything got to go get another beer.
05:15:07
Speaker
So hang on. that one There's no pause on this game. There's pause. There's no pause on this game. there's no power sp gorgeous no pause on this game yeah Yeah. You fucking. Yeah. no i that that that That whole situation. i was it is you know I'm okay with that.
05:15:29
Speaker
and no fucking cross country bullshit and boom but yeah no no there says limb me there psycho there baby there's my baby right i won't call i won't call you by name I won't call you by name again.
05:15:42
Speaker
yeah She don't know. You can't pronounce now we No. We've been talking. we We talked for a little minute. and Then we met. and She threw me right into the fire with her family.
05:15:57
Speaker
and we meet we She's Her family likes So far, her family likes me. um And, you know, we will they say that. where yeah did Did I come back to you saying her family likes you?
05:16:14
Speaker
Dude, what are you doing? fucking dayton What are you doing? Dating retards, man. Stop it. yeah I'm joking. I'm joking, Kayla. Her family likes retards. So here we are.
05:16:26
Speaker
yeah Maybe it's because maybe maybe they're really nice. Her family's really nice. Now. No, no. She took me right into the fire. No, we talked for a little bit. Yeah, no, we talked for a little bit.
05:16:39
Speaker
And then we met, we hung out, and we spent the last week together. And no, she's local. As I said, she's local. And
05:16:55
Speaker
She loves what I do here I don't know why but she loves this Network see if you can show her pictures so they can see her I mean no She's in the comments That's her picture There you go And we're friends on Facebook Angel So you can go No I did that's why I said she's fucking gorgeous I know she is One of my very good friends Is like dude No disrespect, but how much chloroform is it taking for you to keep this girl? I see her and I see you.
05:17:34
Speaker
Apparently apparently that's what it was, being Browns fan.
05:17:42
Speaker
Yo, Johnny. yeah Remember when I had cornrows? Yeah. Nobody cares. Right? right Hey!
05:17:55
Speaker
There's my Scotto. There he is. There's my Scotto. There's my Scotto. Love him. Hold on, Scotto. You gotta show her your nails.
05:18:08
Speaker
Oh, did you get them done again? Are you missing the nails again? Those fucking pearls right there. Those fucking pearls. Yes. Oh, well done, Scotto. Hell yeah. Hell yeah.
05:18:19
Speaker
like yeah but we do Is that
05:18:26
Speaker
is that a Piggly Wiggly t-shirt? Yes, it sure is, sir. okay Okay. That's my beautiful scotto. I grew up in another town that the next town over to this day is still a Piggly Wiggly. So whenever I go visit home, I go to the Piggly Wiggly.
05:18:42
Speaker
I don't know if there's still one in town, but one, yeah, we used to have one grown up. Yeah. It was like a food line or something like that. Yeah. More or less. Pressure store. ah A little bit of everything.
05:18:55
Speaker
Yeah, with Piggly Wiggly's down in South Carolina and shit. Skydo wants a Piggly Wiggly. No, he's already got one. Wait a minute.
05:19:09
Speaker
I can get Piggly. Oh, I'm sure you can. I do not doubt you. Well,
05:19:17
Speaker
I'm slightly disappointed. It's only 1230 and I can't order no more beer. and I'll see. ya was going to fucking sing a song. Oh, do it. Do it. Go ahead, Rick. Go ahead, Rick.
05:19:30
Speaker
Serenade. Glick's over there sexting with Kay Lacton like he's trying to order beer on Uber. I want more fucking beer. This fucking beer gave me a headache tonight.
05:19:48
Speaker
I'm about to order a fucking pizza just so I can get more fucking beer. hi Yeah, I'd like a small personal pan pizza and 36 beers, please.
05:20:00
Speaker
Right? Holy shit. Oh, they're closed. That fucking door is. Man, I don't know about, is it like just shit around you? Like, ever since fucking COVID, restaurants that used to be open until like, you midnight, 1 a.m. around here, everything closes at like fucking 9 o'clock anymore, man. Yeah. The only thing, the only thing over 9 o'clock is like Burger King until like midnight and fucking McDonald's until like 1 a.m. Yeah, Wendy's and McDonald's here. And Wendy's, yeah, yeah. That's it. That's it. All the other restaurants are like, fuck y'all.
05:20:32
Speaker
COVID happened. We ain't staying open past fucking 8 o'clock. inre now here I don't want to fucking drive 30 minutes to fucking end now. Alright, so it's not just me. right Yeah, if you sneeze or some shit, they come splinter the whole area with bleach or whatever. Yeah, fuck them bitches. Alright,
05:20:52
Speaker
right well, I guess I feel a little bit better knowing it's not just me. it's not really i'm I'm really like kind of fucking fuck her, I always... Scotto, what'd you do? How the fuck can you not get one beer? snuck so from there He said his butt hurt.
05:21:11
Speaker
always I always order beer on DoorDash, and now all of a sudden it's like... It's just got him stuttering, man. And I can't. I was like a fucking meth head going through with your house.
05:21:25
Speaker
Right. I can click the button, and it was like, cheats.
05:21:33
Speaker
What, like there's nobody on? Nobody available? that the problem? I don't know. I've never used DoorDash or Uber Eats or of that shit. It says no items available.
DoorDash and Cigarettes
05:21:43
Speaker
Can I order cigarettes? I can order fucking cigarettes.
05:21:48
Speaker
Well, they don't deliver where I live. They're like, dude, you order a case a fucking day. We're out.
05:21:55
Speaker
No, I don't. Can we please replenish our fucking stock?
05:22:01
Speaker
I... yeah shouldbye wait home Hold up, hold up, check your shit, because DoorDash has been talking up lately. I remember the night or the other morning at work, and went to the next town over, not mine.
05:22:14
Speaker
It's like 45 minutes. Oh, shit, oh, shit, oh, shit, you know what, you're right. You're right. I forgot like I shared DoorDash with people. Angel's on it, man.
05:22:26
Speaker
Yeah, my was 45 minutes late. which i mean no You get a booty call, man. It it gives like the brain clarity and shit, man. No, it's on me. yeah no it's Your beer is on route.
05:22:43
Speaker
Hold your horses, man.
05:22:46
Speaker
This ain't Budweiser. We don't deliver by Clydesdale. I wish I did. Can I ask a
Kayla and Podcast Support
05:22:54
Speaker
personal question? like yeah boy yeah sure since Since you guys are obviously a couple and you've made it public, is there a reason Kayla doesn't come up on panel with you?
05:23:07
Speaker
um
05:23:11
Speaker
yeah and She knows we're all going to invite her in and in love on her and shit. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Well, I mean... It's us. Just say it. It's us. She's got her thing.
05:23:26
Speaker
for for for ah For obvious reasons. um
05:23:34
Speaker
But also it's kind of like. Okay, there's law involved. Never mind. There's no law involved. Like I'm like.
05:23:47
Speaker
um's sorry good I will make it be known that I'm in a relationship and I have no problem letting it be known who I'm in a relationship with. But. but never she wants to come if she If she wants to come up with, if she wants to come up here or she's if she's here or I'm there and she wants to pop on screen, she's welcome to, but I'm not going to push it. I'm not going to push it.
05:24:09
Speaker
Well, yeah, wasn't trying to push it. I was just asking the question. And it's all personal shit, man. You don't have to explain it. This is new territory for me because this is um
05:24:23
Speaker
is new territory for me because This one's sorry. This is the first relationship that I've been in since my ex-wife and I split up.
05:24:41
Speaker
That was local-ish. hey
05:24:46
Speaker
Yeah, everybody I've been with has been long distance. Oh, lovely. Okay, yeah. She's about an hour from me. It's all good. You guys ain't ready to do it. That's all you had to say, man. I wasn't trying to pry. i was just curious.
05:24:57
Speaker
But no, she she wait she loves ah she loves what she does here or what we do here. um Even before we met, she was already checking out the podcast and she loves what we do and she loves the panels we have on Saturdays and and and and and the other shows and stuff like that.
05:25:14
Speaker
And Typically, I'm the first one to be like, yeah, who's the podcast? You guys should check it out. And and I've met some of her family. I'm going to meet more of her family next weekend.
05:25:27
Speaker
And she's done told everybody. like she's She's so proud. And she's so eager to tell people about what I do with the podcast and and about group.
05:25:40
Speaker
like our our our our group And it makes me feel good. So she's first. bringing She's one of the first people who's ever been like that. And so. That's a good thing. ne man Cheers to you guys. Yeah.
05:25:54
Speaker
Yeah. Cheers. and And somehow you convinced her you're famous. How'd you do that? yeah yeah always living that your sacred yeah tell me amazing she me watched if She watched last weekend's podcast rock.
05:26:09
Speaker
She really just found a quick She was like, you lost your tan, baby. Last I told her, I said, hey, this is my this is my little brother.
05:26:23
Speaker
And I was like, I know you're probably not going to see the family resemblance, but this is my little brother and we're basically identical. And I pulled up the stream and she was like,
05:26:35
Speaker
I totally see it. You guys are identical. You guys could basically be twins. I was like, yep. She's a goddamn keeper. yeah
05:26:47
Speaker
now I
TikTok Thirst Traps
05:26:49
Speaker
wasn't trying to get personal. matt well nice aspect of it Not to be mean, but what type of tism does she have? What kind of what? Tism.
05:26:58
Speaker
She's a little special. ah she's a little special Well, mean, she's dating you, so... It was kind of assumed, man.
05:27:10
Speaker
We're happy for you. We're happy for you. I don't know who's taking advantage of you. nice to kind of meet you, Kayla. Welcome to the fucked up family. That's what mean. I have a feeling... i have a feeling... i ready the fact that she got in the comments tonight speaks volumes.
05:27:27
Speaker
I have a feeling she'll be popping... on camera, whether with me or maybe, possibly in the panel the before any of us expect it.
05:27:40
Speaker
No. So, what you're saying is no more lonely fucking TikTok nights? Yeah. I mean, she encourages... Dude, I gotta follow you on TikTok.
05:27:52
Speaker
I hear all these like ill hear all this shit about you on TikTok. I need to follow you on TikTok. I mean, shout out to her. i God love her. God love her because I was like,
05:28:04
Speaker
She hadn't seen my TikTok, and I was like, I do thirst traps from time to time. I'm talking about your live ones. You're a fucking live one. She was like, you do thirst traps? And I was like, yeah.
05:28:15
Speaker
Wait, you go live on third on TikTok? He does. yeah yeah nothing He Give me a give me your shit so give me your shit in private chat, man, follow it's glick time likeck underscore talk two point um Yeah, I'm always getting my for that. I'm like, dude, let's go to this show. let's go this one Let's go to this one. i do funny So we were laying in bed the other night, and I was like, I of do thirst stress on TikTok from time to time. And she was like, let me see. And she hadn't even seen my TikTok.
05:28:49
Speaker
Like, we're both on TikTok, and and and and and and she hadn't seen my TikTok yet. And I showed her, and she was like, And she was like, could send you photos.
05:29:00
Speaker
I screen trust everything. Yeah, she was like, damn. and and and and i made And I made a joke that I was going to go buy a screen mask and I wanted to do a thirst trap. This is before her and I started talking and stuff like that.
05:29:14
Speaker
And she was like, ah yeah, you need to do that. You need to go. You need to go. buy the scream mask and do whatever thirst trap you were thinking about doing. She's one, man. I like her. I like her. She encourages my bullshit. She's like, you got to get the followers. You got to get the likes. You got to get the views. i mean shes she doesn't you feel at home She encourages that now.
05:29:41
Speaker
she won she right now she does so she does tiktok shop she's got enough followers she has tiktoks shop and She can promote stuff and push stuff.
05:29:53
Speaker
and and and Now, granted, like I told her, obviously, if I go buy the screen mask, it might be one or two videos on TikTok. But it translates to whenever you want me it's good to get the screen mask out in real life for you. You know what I mean? A little book talk.
05:30:13
Speaker
book talk yep yeah yes yes little scream talk she won them she won them tiktok gets to see it on tiktok but she gets it in real life and i mean if that's what she wants if i gotta put the screen mask on and and do what i gotta do for her so but basically all your pictures i see on instagram daily are the are the are basically the screenshots from your tiktok mean do you Wait a minute which instagram Which Instagram do you follow?
05:30:46
Speaker
I don't know Whichever one you gave me months back I didn i gave you the nonsensical nonsense Well that then that that's the one I'm seeing The one where you're like Good morning It's a great day to be a good day All your positive Bullshit yeah Yes. yes wellll well we'll We'll go with that. Apparently I don't have the good one. no you know but yeah It's all good because I'm not really on that that fucker that much. so that's all i mean ah You don't want to be on the good.
05:31:25
Speaker
You don't want to be on that. baby Who does the bitch have to suck off to get some fucking links over here? the hell?
05:31:34
Speaker
and Scott O Glick underscore talk 2.0 and then send me a message on there and I'll send you my Instagram link.
05:31:47
Speaker
But Ma, I don't wanna. And I'll send you my OnlyFans link if you want it. No, no, definitely not. When you get a message from that's Just got to say hi My nickname is White Flight. Thank you. White Flight.
05:32:09
Speaker
Speaking of OnlyFans and my she is 100% on board with me because apparently I have a nice voice.
05:32:21
Speaker
I do not want to hear about you and fucking OnlyFans. Apparently I have a voice and I don't see it and don't understand it. But a lot of women have asked for me to do an OnlyVans where I'm reading the BookTok books.
05:32:39
Speaker
And I was telling her about it. I have a very ASMR voice. And she was like, oh, my God. Because she reads those. She's she's fully engulfed in those. And she was like, oh, my God, you have to do it. You have to do it.
05:32:53
Speaker
And I'm like, you have to send me books and chapters. Like, you have to send me the animation. Dude, have her read the dark series. I want to hear you making your own shit up, man. Modog has a voice for it. Lick, not you.
05:33:07
Speaker
No offense. Well, we'll use your video and my voice. You can just lip sync it. angel yeah i mean Angel just looks for every reason to shit on me. man you nine Not drunk. Not drunk. Not drunk. No, I don't agree with you, Angel.
05:33:24
Speaker
Not a drunk. league But yes, apparently I do have the voice
05:33:30
Speaker
No, because it's got a high pitch out there at the end of everything you say. It looks like I rode up on my stallion. I licked my finger. I turned the page. There you go. Jersey, take your man.
05:33:43
Speaker
Jersey, come back. Yeah, she done crashed. well
05:33:51
Speaker
God damn it. Well, I'm going to have send you a fucking link and be like, nah, fuck it. I don't want to see your shit, dude. I don't want to see you after being all fucking... that just terrified what you wish i only i't only do I'm good. i'll see I'll see you here on Saturday nights and hang out with you, man. I don't only do 30 steps on TikTok.
05:34:10
Speaker
Send me her fucking TikTok thing I can follow her, please. And I'll tell her about the fucking books that I read. Oh, wait. I'll take Kayla's. I'll take Kayla's. That's what saying. I'm joking.
05:34:22
Speaker
Send me her fucking links for TikTok. I'll follow her. And I'll write her about the fucking books that I read. And trust me, she's going to fucking love them. Wait, can I ask a stupid question? And this is going make me sound stupid. no I have no question stupid. Is BookTok really? is Is that a real thing?
05:34:37
Speaker
I obviously don't get on TikTok. We discussed this a while back. Dude, I was kind of drunk that night. I literally was... My son and I were at Spirit Halloween today. It's all like dirty book shit? Like erotic novels? It's a real thing. I literally... My son and I were at Spirit Halloween today.
05:34:59
Speaker
and I had ah the new scream mask, scream mask. I know you know I'm talking about, Angel. And I had it on, and I took a picture of it, and I sent it, and I sent it to Kayla, and she was like, oh, yeah. That's why last night on the live stream, I fucking blazed the mic and were talking about it.
05:35:20
Speaker
And about minutes left, was like, the characters, but the scream mask is the thing. And they're like, wait, what? So I was like, don't talk about a scream mask. I told her, I said, I'm going down there Friday when I get off work.
05:35:35
Speaker
And now we're still doing the show next Saturday. She made it very clear. She made it very clear that we're still going to the show Saturday. She's like, you can do it from the back porch, wherever, blah, blah, blah.
05:35:46
Speaker
So we're still doing the show next Saturday. But I was like, apparently I have to buy this mask and yeah bring it with me next weekend. Do do i need to buy a screen mask and start a TikTok page or some shit? i mean yeah I'm an unemployed broke motherfucker over here. yeah Bullshit. My TikTok page is not all thirst traps. I do all kinds of shit.
05:36:14
Speaker
He does really does. ah
05:36:18
Speaker
Oh, my God. oh my God. Did you get a beer? Oh, my God. Oh, my God. You got your beer? No. Skylar just followed me on TikTok. Well, congratulations.
05:36:33
Speaker
welcome congratulations Motherfucker hung monkey is me, bitch. I told you that. No! My Scott will follow me. My sweet will follow me. Oh, God. Here we go again.
05:36:45
Speaker
Scott will follow me. It just went fucking full gay on us again, man. Don't fucking judge me, of bitches. You know what two people got following me is my husband and fucking Glick. We don't. we don't we Hold on a damn second, Angel.
05:36:59
Speaker
Oh, no. You got you. I made the new account. Yeah, because the end of that provocative shit on there. can let my town see me doing that stuff. Oh, I don't give a fuck who sees me doing provocative shit. Y'all some like little side fucking freaky deaky motherfuckers up in here. So here we are.
05:37:16
Speaker
I know. Yeah, I know you know. You got the video. Of you in the shower? no why Doesn't matter. doesn't matter She's like carry fuck on on. Moving on. want Hoss' It was it was one hundred percent ticktokck approved and know hoss i but as naked talking like doing some of them in before everybody else before anybody else when you' single single
05:37:51
Speaker
and we know for a while awesome awesome Also, single, single, but before anybody gets any crazy-ass ideas... Too late. Too late. Too late.
05:38:02
Speaker
It was not... Like, it was... She was like, you think this is TikTok approved? Too late. And I was like, yeah. Because she didn't show anything.
05:38:12
Speaker
Oh, she was just looking... Okay. You fucking whore. Not much, but some cleavage went up. So it was decent.
05:38:21
Speaker
I need to run this by a male friend to see if it's okay.
OnlyFans BookTok Idea
05:38:28
Speaker
It was a good TikTok thirst trap, it wasn't like... It wasn't like... It wasn't like... It wasn't like some full-on crazy video. It was just like, TikTok's in a blog. I'm like, no, that's cool. He can't tell me. He's like, you make videos. don't know what the fuck do. He's like, just do whatever. like...
05:38:49
Speaker
right We're talking. and fucking We're flirting and everything else. Here we go. I'll make this video. yeah was good tom was going to let to I'm just going to let Glic's little thirst trap shit just live free in my head.
05:39:04
Speaker
I'm not going to follow you. I'm just going to make shit up. because no know I know my imagination. i'll be like I doubt One, two, you know exact yeah first but i think literally so afterter one to Oh, what do you do? Like fucking cooking videos and gardening and shit? Shut the fuck up, dude. There's like five or six videos before have omelet. Let show you how I make the omelet for my sweetheart in the morning. Click's like, I don't just do thirst traps. I got two gardening videos and one of me like shopping at Walmart. But I got 168 thirst traps out there.
05:39:38
Speaker
yeah No, it's not even that bad. it' no it's I'm just fucking with it. It's not even like that because because I told Gaila the other night, like, yeah, you know, I've done some thirst traps. And she's like, oh, yeah, let me see.
05:39:50
Speaker
So I had to go to my TikTok page. And I had to literally scroll to find the thirst traps. Fair enough. I don't know. Also, I'm fucking dealing. I never work. Stop. Stop.
05:40:00
Speaker
It's always you. It's always you. and never worked because like me laugh fucking yeah sorry even mean it's always you andology you I can go that all the time. I only have two friends on there. You and my ex-husband.
05:40:16
Speaker
So here we are. Why are you why are you on my sweet page? And one of those was a booty call tonight. So just saying. Yeah. I'll be here next week. I'll be here next week. I'll be here next week. boun ca about and dad dad didn't dance but pen my husband and I ain't had sex with my ex-fucking wife.
05:40:41
Speaker
You can't trust where she's fucking been. I can trust my husband. He's big truck driver. And he can fuck with nobody else. Fucking crackhead motherfuckers. So yeah. yeah no truck Truck drivers are never around fucking lot lizards and shit. They that yeah each other shit down. on top of that,
05:41:01
Speaker
fuck We were on the phone pretty much 24-7. They shut that shit down. or yeah They shut down pussy on the road. Shut up, woman. What are you talking about? They did. They shut that shit down. They got to fucking crack that shit. Him and I on the phone all the time.
05:41:16
Speaker
You got to look for that shit. wow and Angel, I'm just fucking with you. You know that, right? I know you are because you're also a Marine just like him. i'm just well it's there lotley Oh, he's a Marine? Oh, he's definitely getting fucked out on the road.
05:41:31
Speaker
He's a Marine and a fucking Army. Alright, Marine and Army. You did both fucking two bands.
05:41:40
Speaker
The Sarge? are you talking about Sarge? she's talking about mag Keep up, Rex. God damn it. Keep up and get the fuck out of here.
05:41:52
Speaker
Speak up. I'm a little deaf in my left ear. Motherfucking.
05:41:57
Speaker
okay here's Here's the important question. Click. Did you get your beer ordered?
05:42:04
Speaker
I literally have a half hour no items are available. but my know i literally have a half hour and it says no items are available So what's that mean? Since I don't use the app and I don't do that shit. What does not what does there are no items available? what look beer What's that mean? I don't know. This is the first time I've this is this is on Well, it probably means there's no... Can have fucking door dash you fucking beer?
05:42:31
Speaker
No, i have split the mails and see yeah yeah I can... I can literally door dash. like I can get a fucking Mountain Dew. I mean, obviously, that does not mean the fucking store is out of beer, right?
05:42:44
Speaker
yeah Yeah, no. They shouldn't be out of here. Just no drivers available? Is that what that means? well Unless Glick drank it all. No. Because I can still order anything else.
05:42:58
Speaker
Jedi. Jedi backstage. Backstage. yeah i is backstage
05:43:03
Speaker
backstage ah
05:43:07
Speaker
He ate him some pig brains and charged up his ear pods or iPods or whatever. Pig brains and pickled pigs. yeah Have you ever had pickled pigs? What's up, Jedi, you lazy fucking whore?
05:43:19
Speaker
Hey, I can't see. Wait a minute. Let my eyes adjust. Cheers, y'all. I'm going to start reading books on BookTok or whatever the fuck that is. Yes, do it. I'm going to have to check that shit out. I'm fine.
05:43:32
Speaker
but moag you were there jersey i talking about um She's in all of that too. Let's go.
05:43:42
Speaker
He wants to think that was water. It's a big fucking glass of gin. I can read some dirty shit, man. I'm just saying. I mean, you know, you got to know when to hold them and know when to fold.
05:43:56
Speaker
I'm just saying. Not how my first story would start. Just saying. I'm doing okay, Jim. Chet, we've been talking about you, man. Your ear's been burning. no i put some cream on them i put some cream on them wow are you you're that white and do not have the i'm i'm disappointed i i assumed jed could like talk to aliens and yeah i can you can i just block out all your bullshit i can hear yeah he's lazy he's just fucking lazy to deal with the shit
05:44:29
Speaker
they've They've been wanting to come down for the last 35 fucking years save the planet and shit. He's ignoring it. No, I've been warning them against us. I'm like, no. Yeah, fair enough. Just watch. Just watch and see what happens. Go back. the information You don't want to come down here.
05:44:43
Speaker
Good man. Yeah, keep your distance and just watch. Yeah, you'll see what happens. Yeah, just watch the shit show. what was the opposite you said ah something sith instead of lazy it was going to be what excited extra motivated sith motivate motivat there you go motivated see i i like that i like that most of the time i'm a lazy jedi i turn into a motivated seth and you don't want that when we see you you're mostly just lazy jedi yeah i'm lazy jetdi na i'd love to see you pissed off yelling at an employee one time
05:45:21
Speaker
ah That would be funny. Don't pick on my boy. It's not funny. ah It's it pretty fucking hectic. Don't pick on my boy. no i'm I'm actually pretty laid back.
05:45:33
Speaker
That's my boy. Don't pick on him. i I'm saying i would ah just the opposite of picking on him. I would love to see it happen. That's not picking on him. Seriously, yeah. yeah Hey, you'd be pissed off and going around like the Tasmanian Jedi and shit.
05:45:47
Speaker
I'd see him just storming into a fucking you know conference room and shit, banging both hands down on a fucking table. Listen up, motherfuckers! You can't handle the truth. Yeah.
05:45:59
Speaker
And Sergeant may be just sitting there fucking crying. We're laughing so hard. Like, shut up. Get on a fucking podcast, bitch. I can't breathe. Pleasure alone. You talk good, but don't talk shit. Good night. Pleasure alone.
05:46:17
Speaker
Jedi knows I love him like a brother man he knows that oh yeah Modog's my dude mean I'd fuck him like a sister but I love him like my brother I'm from the north honky we don't do that up here here's you're over there you're out get out west man you're out west yeah northway I mean talk about saying the quiet part out loud damn it Sarge I know I fucked up the beer's kicking in man unlike Glick I have beer I got beer the store is not empty where fucking Modog's from yeah it's called my fridge I got four hours I need more beer hey I got five I've been drinking since six o'clock this morning you've been what drinking since six o'clock this morning yeah
Workday Confusion
05:47:08
Speaker
there are programs you can get into to help with that you know that right
05:47:11
Speaker
No, I drank so much I fucking got sober again. Jesus Christ, girl. She drank herself sober. like I had nobody talk to. Nobody to talk to. of my fucking kids. She's like, Glick wasn't on the thirst trap fucking thing today. I didn't have anything to I wanted to talk to him on there.
05:47:26
Speaker
But no, fucking, I woke up this morning. i came out, let dogs out, and the big girls. I fucking slid the puppy stuff whatever else for the little dogs. I fucking fed the old ass cat that can't eat dry food. She can. She just don't fucking want to.
05:47:39
Speaker
Did you feed her some pig brains? No, fuck no. Whatever the fuck is in the can. I don't know. I came outside and I went back in. My son's getting ready for work. i'm like, bro, what are you doing? He's like, I'll get work. I'll work soon.
05:47:53
Speaker
I was like, huh? I think we're from 11 to 10 or 5 to 11. He's like, do. And I'm late. you're not. and i'm late ah no you're not he there he was like, you said it's like couple months till 8. I need to be it early.
05:48:08
Speaker
I was like, and he went in bathroom, came back out. I'm bucking for that promotion, mom. okay I was like, but I was like, look, was like, where are you going? He's like, to work.
05:48:19
Speaker
I'm dressed. I was like, he's like, wait. was like, honey, you don't work till tonight. He's like, wait, it's 8 a.m. I got another can of pork brains right here. Shush. He's like, it's 8 a.m. I'm telling the story, motherfucker.
05:48:31
Speaker
Motherfucker. he's like it's aim p.m i was like it's a.m m he's like oh and he he sat there and got fucked up because he thought i went to work this morning which saturday's in my day off and he thought i came home and went to bed and woke up a nap and he was late to fucking work so he got up and fucking got dressed and everything ready to go work was like honey you know worked for five I've done that shit on a Saturday before, man. I forgot it was Saturday. I've done it too. Woke up 5.30, got a shower, blah, blah, blah. Be the only motherfucker sitting work pissed off because none of my fucking employees were there.
05:49:05
Speaker
Like, what the fuck? um you alllthough Then my wife texts me like, yeah where are you at? I'm like, fuck. You know Saturday, right? I don't know. I would drop the kids at the fucking bus stop. I go back home. I take a nap for a bros back in the day.
05:49:19
Speaker
I fucking wake back up. i'm like, fuck. You know what that means? take the kids to work. Yeah. You got over on the Friday night and lost the whole weekend. But you thought it was. Yeah, you thought it was over stress.
05:49:34
Speaker
yeah I slept all weekend. No, you didn't. i will work I woke up on a Saturday and panicked and started to get ready and then realized it was Saturday. I've never actually made it into work. not know Oh, yeah. you yeah fucking I'll watch cartoons in my workplace. yeah buts yeah um'm um I've been that dick dad once or twice in my life, man. like My kids got it but it thought it was like school day and I'd let them like get dressed. Literally, because the school was only a five-minute walk from our house and shit.
05:50:03
Speaker
i is cross street and I'd be sitting out on the porch drinking a cup of coffee and shit and they'd be like, come back looking at me like, you fucking asshole. yeah Jedi, without getting too personal, what do you do, man? What's what's your line of work?
05:50:15
Speaker
I work in manufacturing. sure I'm not going to say what I make. Should I work somewhere house? No, no, no. was just I was just curious what you did. It's too easy to guess where I would work if I told you got you. I'm getting ready swatch your ass right now, man.
05:50:31
Speaker
It's all good. Everybody fucking knows I work in their fucking convenience liquor store.
05:50:39
Speaker
Oh wait, Jedi, I owe you a fuck you because you made me laugh right when I took a bong hit when you said that shit earlier. we went so there No, I choked hard on that.
05:50:50
Speaker
I was like, ugh. What did I do to make you laugh? I don't remember. yo like got something You know, like I'll say something offhand and you'll say something offhand. I don't really remember exactly. but I remember choking on the fucking bong hit. I remember that part. i mean What I heard is we got a choker and we got a spitter. I think Greg chokes on a lot more things. I know when to choke him.
05:51:15
Speaker
Hold on.
05:51:18
Speaker
So Glick, you got nine minutes left. Are you going to let go after six hours? Glick's fading out on us. Glick's fading out on us. I thought he just got more beer.
05:51:30
Speaker
No, I can't get no more beer. Fucking Scott almost spit that shit out. His store is out of beer. I think i dr they saw you come across the order and they're like, no, we got to cut this motherfucker off.
05:51:45
Speaker
You're
Podcast as Therapy
05:51:48
Speaker
on the new fucking Utah. Good luck with that. His local liquor store text goes straight to his fucking therapist and shit. He's like, no, no, don't fill that fucking order. Fuck him. yeah um I hope you guys understand that you guys are my therapist. This is my therapy.
05:52:10
Speaker
Well, you're totally fucked, sir. I'm okay with that. That is the official diagnosis. You are fucked. Kayla, we apologize. We are so sorry, Kayla. That girl knows more about me than caleb we apologize like yeah we' so sorry kale that that we not a girl news that girl was more about me than anybody may ever know about me.
05:52:37
Speaker
I already know. Sounds familiar. whatever
05:52:46
Speaker
level yeah No, not bullshit. I'll just like it. with him Awesome. much we un realing We've heard this before.
05:52:56
Speaker
I'll have a purple crayon in here. This is Lord of the Glick. There's three parts to do this. I'm trying to do this right wait oh guy okay good oh um man amazing what did you What did you think you did wrong last time that you're correcting this time?
05:53:20
Speaker
First, he shared his thirst traps. At the end of the day, let's be honest. number two excited know the video break at dream of the day at the end of the day let's be honest Welcome to Glick's house of wayward women where we foster women and until they find their forever home.
05:53:42
Speaker
Glick's house of debauchery. That's it. Glick's halfway house. Also, what I done different? She's so there's that she's local that's why why do you date hey look to me well okay jenna finish your joke i'm sorry sorry sorry no no i was just gonna be serious as much as we're breaking glick over the coals about this shit i'm glad you found somebody make you happy and y'all click together you know what i mean
05:54:18
Speaker
So, I mean, we're breaking you over the coals and we're going to roast your ass for you. And you guys should. that's is that that that's what we do That's how you know we love you, man. We're fucking with you. As much as I love Jersey and Modal, and I know that Jersey and Modal love each other, like, we...
05:54:37
Speaker
break their bowls constantly. And I know Jersey, oh yeah she's going to be mad because Mo Dog and I are going to hang out before they do. debt like God damn it, shut went to bed. She's not Talk about wake up. up and guy we play grow it's it's funny and how you name your network and shit when you sign up for like your new cable company I literally named him on Modog's House of Debauchery.
WiFi Name Humor
05:55:10
Speaker
I had everybody in my fucking building like like trying to figure out who the fuck that was because they don't know me by Modog. They'd be asking me. I'm like, oh yeah I don't know who the fuck that is, man, but that motherfucker don't sound right, man. Wait a minute. That's not your government name?
05:55:26
Speaker
No, that's not my government name. is, but the D's not capitalized. not capitalized. Oh, thank you. yeah That's how I hide. i there's yeah There's a five in my name, but it's silent.
05:55:41
Speaker
Is that Exactly. exactly Back on my book talk days, you know.
05:55:53
Speaker
Yeah. That's a fucking a new one on me. I've never heard of that. just well only have Apparently, Click's going to get naked and wear a screen mask and like read erotic novels and shit. He does that every Sunday. Moe Dogg.
05:56:11
Speaker
Is your actual name Bruce? Well, fucking hello, Miss Doxie now. Fuck. What the
Batman and Bruce Wayne Jokes
05:56:17
Speaker
fuck, man? Whoa. What the fuck? I found you on Facebook. I told you I could a name right now. Blindside.
05:56:25
Speaker
God damn. No, that's not my name. mo dog american its here bru mod dog Is your name Steve Smith? not no you been no it's no that's not me ah um ha ha um ah you and you bruce wayne at one two three m street and your yeah Does your house look like a cave and do you have a black car with wings on the back of it?
05:56:56
Speaker
Do you have an ankle for a butler who is a badass? Do you ever get an urge to punch criminals in the face? Do you stare at the moon when it's full bright and think somebody's shooting a signal your way?
05:57:10
Speaker
Do you have a weird obsession with... with underage boys that you adopted. That could be a lot of weird things.
05:57:20
Speaker
but that could be a lot of things that I'm just saying. agent that watches Sorry nobody know that. you know But...
05:57:34
Speaker
I'll send you the fucking two shot of what I found. Dear FBI agent, if you don't know what we're talking about, read the Batman comic book series. Exactly.
05:57:46
Speaker
He's pulling up all our files right now. It's the same fucking name, bro. It's the same name. I can find anybody except for a shaman. here somema Okay, no, i found two people i let be some every I found two people on different platforms or multiple platforms.
05:58:03
Speaker
Could be shaman, but that's the only one that fucking evades me. I'm gonna find him, I'm gonna find him. I've never met a stalker in a person. i used to fucking do this for living.
05:58:16
Speaker
used to start no I got paid by people to fucking find people and find information on themselves. I don't know if we can be friends. I don't care about you that much. I ain't looking to you.
05:58:28
Speaker
Thanks for listening. Thanks for listening thanks hanging out. Appreciate y'all. Check out Nonsense Nonsense right here on the nonsenical Nonsense Go Nonsense. Jedi, do a fucking after party.
05:58:44
Speaker
Do an after party, Jedi.
05:58:56
Speaker
Nonsensical network, different flavor every day. Movie talks, new flicks, hitting the display. Microphone magic, musicians spill the praise.
05:59:11
Speaker
Catching on the tales, world and stories we embrace Tune in, tune in, every week diverse Groove to the beats, let the rhythm immerse Lyrics flowing, ciphers full of verse Nonsensical network, feel the universe Interviews buzzing, stars in the circuit Worlds of tapestry, pieces we interpret Hip-hop to rap, the flow never stagnant, reptilian tales
05:59:47
Speaker
Network of nonsense but the vibes just right Tune in, tune in, wait for that beat Flow so fast
05:59:59
Speaker
like always on repeat