Nonsensical Nonsense: People are dumb

Transcript

Speaker: Yes. Yes.

Speaker: Welcome to the F-

Speaker: ah y'all better look the fuck out today. My crayons are sharp, the box is full, my bottle of glue is topped off, and my helmet's on tight, baby. We're about to risen with the tism. Let's get with it. Suck my dick and eat my asshole, you sons of bitches.

Speaker: Yeah, that can only mean one thing. Bitches, it's Saturday night. What's going on, everybody? Hopefully you guys had a good week. Man, I haven't been on a Saturday night show in a buck, like two weeks, three weeks, something like that.

Speaker: But nonetheless, if you're not already, go ahead and check us out. Facebook, Instagram, X, and TikTok. Shows are live all the fucking time on our YouTube, Facebook, and Twitch channels.

Speaker: You guys can always check us out there. And you can listen anytime, anyplace, wherever you listen to podcasts. Simply go to bio.link slash nonsensicalnetwork or hit your old Google box and type in nonsensicalnetwork and you're going to find it.

Speaker: I guarantee it's going like the first thing that pops up. Where that fucking popping. I'm just saying at the end of the day. So, anywho, yes, it has been a long time, guys. I hope you've enjoyed the last couple of Saturday nights.

Speaker: My camera's being crazy right now. We're going see if we can get it fixed. Rocky came in and did his thing. And then last Saturday, the training wheels got kicked off.

Speaker: And this young lady right here was left in the driver's seat. Oh, wait, what? Shit, I didn't even know you brought me up. Fuck.

Speaker: Yeah, I know. I caught you. You weren't paying attention. So I brought you up. What's going on, Wally? What's going on, Chatterbox? I see you down there. What up, man? see Hey, Nancy. Hey, Wally.

Speaker: What the? Woo-woo. Yeah. What's up, guys? Yeah, you got to you got the doors kicked off. Macy's in there, your little niece. I was going to pitch you wearing pitch yellow and blue because are we win us, baby.

Speaker: All we do is win, win. win yeah Didn't y'all lose last week? Yeah, we did. We fucking lost. Aren't you guys basically as bad as the Browns this year? but Yeah, but the Eagles won, though. Yeah.

Speaker: So, hey. Oh, my God. Mow Dog in the house. Let's go. Stores in the house. Stores in the house. Let's go. What she said. What up, Mow Dog? How's it going?

Speaker: Yeah, man. i've've i've I've honestly missed the last couple Saturday nights not being here, but you guys held that. Rocky held down the fort when we were at Michael's wedding. um Then last weekend, I had some things come up, and I decided I was going to take a night off and and go enjoy the finer things in life.

Speaker: hey That's what that's what do you want to fucking call it. But no, I got to see a little bit of the show last week.

Speaker: Britt, I think you did an awesome job for just kind of getting the training wheels kicked off and just being kind of put on the spot. I came up with it. I was like, let's do the damn thing.

Speaker: but Let's do the damn thing. What up, Jersey? How you doing, girl? Macy, calm down. Hashtag Glacush. It feels good. Slut and whore is put together. That's what I mean, Macy. You're 12. There's your number one fan, Robert robert Platinum. oh but Finally, I get acknowledged. What am I, chopped liver over here, Robert?

Speaker: ah Hey, how's it going, Robert? What's up? How's it going?

Speaker: Joycee? Let's go. We got the main people up in here. Love it. With gravy. yeah He showed me some f freaking food earlier. oh my God. It was... No, that was not him.

Speaker: you Do you to start? starting like People send me videos of them cooking food and stuff like that.

Speaker: and It looks so good. and i make that's because so hungry. so but That's because you're you're deep down inside you're a fat person stuck in a little person's body. You got body dysmorphia.

Speaker: You want to be fat. you got you got body mismorphia you want to be Yeah, I do. It's not fair, man. Yeah, what Wally said. About time a real host came back to Saturday night.

Speaker: Hey, let's go. Can we see it start the... Wait, what? I don't know what you're talking about. what? Nacey, I don't know what you're talking about.

Speaker: That's Samodan. What up, Megan? Oh. yeah oh I saw Aunt Brittany, so... See what?

Speaker: Hey.

Speaker: I don't bring anything. We see We're going to let her figure this out. well ah Watch, watch. She's going to figure this math problem out. We're just going to sit in there and watch. I got it, but I feel bad because Lazy Jedi isn't here. And it's like,

Speaker: There we go. Dude, you suck at it. You suck at it so bad. At Michael's wedding, you were like... I was still nursing a broken head and a broken rib. Dude, that's my fucking shoulder. What are you talking about?

Speaker: Oh my god, that was like six months ago. kiddding Yeah, and it it fucking hurts. It still fucking hurts. And then having fun, Christopher heard it ah so yeah I didn't do anything.

Speaker: back from sydney and she Megan, you got it. Dang, go, Megan. You're traveling all over the place. That's crazy. Let's go.

Speaker: Get it, girl. yeah Tell them, Jersey. We talking bad about people yet. We're going to need your little niece to come down ah yeah mae calm down.

Speaker: Yeah, you see that, MoDog? You see that? Y'all want to treat me like chopped liver. I take a couple weeks off. and oh who Click who, hashtag click who. Now look how she treats you people.

Speaker: Look how she treats you people. that's

Speaker: but anyway Now she's going to try to figure that bad problem out, Rob. Is that a real thing? back to you're going You're going to see Back to the Future the musical like seven times and traveling all over God's green earth to do it?

Speaker: That's wild. That's crazy. So my brother and his ex-girlfriend, or no, me, my brother's ex-girlfriend and i rented out a whole movie theater to get um Back to the Future 2 tickets for no reason, but you know.

Speaker: I mean, for the birthday, I guess. You rented out an entire movie theater for three goddamn people? No, no, no. It was like maybe like 10 or 12 of us. i mean, it would have been a lot cheaper just to buy 10 or 12 tickets and go see the movie.

Speaker: But we had the... Yeah, they're probably... There probably wasn't that many people in there for Back to the Future 2. I shouldn't show you one of you. You just had to buy your tickets in advance at the end of the day.

Speaker: Because you can do that now at the movie theater. You can buy your tickets online and pick your seats. That's crazy to me. But no, we wanted to have it all to ourselves. ah For my brother's birthday.

Speaker: but For Back to the Future 2? I know, I know, I know. it was still saying it was cool i mean back to the future 2 is great but if i'm going to spend that kind of money it's going to be from the original first one i know i get it i totally get that yeah whatever have seen each movie that's ah very specific number mehan she like

Speaker: do you have a tally board and every time you watch the movie what up chris technician how you doing balker chris technician in the house let's go you should ask somebody to buy her a taco this is the real camera look robert platinum she's down there trying to figure it out she's on the laptop typing in that that math equation yeah my niece's got me in she's got my back man

Speaker: I don't think I spelled that right, but I'll get to the point. I'm actually hashtag I'm adding

Speaker: a guy.

Speaker: but so ri sun i don't think i spellun that right but oh get to find imagine ta maning

Speaker: hey here yeah Wow, you actually have a tally board. I have a tally board, too, from where I did 100 shots in 100 minutes and smoked Michael and watched him puke all over the place.

Speaker: Oh, God, why, why, why talk about puke? Why? You're not a fan of the puke?

Speaker: you're not a fan of you know you're not a fan of the puke I can't. Like, I'll hold my homegirl's hair back, but, like, I have to hold my ears and, like, not breathe. How do you do that if you're holding a hair? How you do that? I'm like, it's, like, it's a task. It's a fucking task.

Speaker: Just stick her head in the toilet and be done with it. Dude. Okay, so, like, when Michael did the fucking pickle shot shit, that, um dropp to it like,

Speaker: That almost got to me. Like when he was drinking the pickle shots. That's disgusting. Yes. My friend, she turned 21 and we went to Pickles Pub and she threw up fucking pickles, alcohol and shit. And I was like, oh, I hold one of my ears with my little shoulder and one with my hand and then her hair with my other hand.

Speaker: I think you got i think i mean that's that's that that's a hell of a friend right there. but But if you've got that many problems and that many difficulties, I'm just going like, yo, you're on your own. I'm not coming in there. I can't do the puke.

Speaker: I can't hear the noise. I can't smell it. I can't see it. You're good. So when Michael brought that up at the fucking wedding, i was like, dude, I can't do it. I can't.

Speaker: I don't even want to know what my IQ is. I'm probably borderline genius, let's be honest. but Okay. What's going on, Angel?

Speaker: think you can talk about that because that's fucking hilarious. I mean, you never know. I could be. I could be, all honesty, a fucking genius.

Speaker: We all know that i'm I'm going to be a cult leader one day. I'm working on it right now. I'm gathering my following by doing this podcast. You think I want a podcast? No, this is how I gather my my followers, my minions. mean yeah I already have a gremlin. Shut up.

Speaker: What's the dinner report? like I just did a frozen pizza tonight. It's just Cash and I at home. We went and got Raisin Cane's for a late lunch. and I was like, dude, just get a frozen pizza for later. He's like, yeah, I'm good with that.

Speaker: so Frozen pizza action. ah We ate some stuff.

Speaker: Things and stuff. You are below lines. Probably. I know we had fucking turkey sandwich with chips and stuff and some pesto pasta shit.

Speaker: Whatever, dude. I'm doing great. I don't think that was the question. The question was, what did you have for dinner? Not are you doing okay? How are you doing over there? Oh, that's not good. so Again, I wasn't asking.

Speaker: a um Yeah, no, I didn't really have like a dinner dinner tonight for sickness or not. so She just got high and went in the kitchen and sat inside the refrigerator and just started eating shit. We have fruit and stuff like that.

Speaker: had strawberries. and I've been trying to eat healthier. You have that? Yeah, let's go. i thought you were a Seahawks fan or something.

Speaker: I like Coke 45, like the malt liquor, but it's already taken. but yeah No, damn, I see what saying. Oh, man. Yeah, but if it's spelled differently, I might be able to roll with it. What you talking about?

Speaker: Cult. Yeah. Don't worry about it. Yeah. not but like If your cult comes with free beer, hey, I got you, bud. I got you. I got you.

Speaker: oh Free beer. Any day that ends in Y. Yeah, Robert Platinum knows what's up. Let's go. Wow, this is the girl coming out of me. It would be a mimosa instead of a beer for for striking. You don't strike me as the mimosa type.

Speaker: it Like like orange crushes. I'm from Maryland. The fucking job. Like that sort of shit. Orange crush.

Speaker: Orange crush the drink. Yeah. Yeah. Like that's that's basic. No, you're hot. The pop. You're a fucking idiot. I hate you so fucking much. It's just pop first and foremost.

Speaker: No, you fucking northern ass bitch. Midwest, but its so know call I I'll call it soda pop. That's as far as I'll fucking take it. Soda!

Speaker: No, I'm talking about Tito's and orange juice. So it's vodka and orange juice. It's basically like what And orange crushes.

Speaker: Okay, so vodka, that's... Okay, I thought a mimosa was orange juice and champagne. That's what mimosas is, yeah. That's like... Okay, I can see the orange pop in vodka. I can see you drinking that, but I don't see it as a mimosa type.

Speaker: Or orange pop in fucking tequila and going out in the yard and fighting raccoons. Dude, when i was at the... When I got left there at the bar...

Speaker: They gave me, I asked for

Speaker: juice and vodka, and they gave me fucking but or fucking tequila instead of vodka, and I couldn't fucking drink it. was like, nope. Tequila, I can't do it, dude.

Speaker: She started drinking that tequila. Next thing you know, she was out in the alley. It's Britney, bitch. It's Britney, bitch.

Speaker: It's Britney. fighting raccoons, stabbing homeless people. but You know what? That's me, man. I promise you, Robert, I will not poison the beer. i guarantee you there will be no poisoning of the beer.

Speaker: yeah you happen to drink too much of the beer and die, and that's really not my fault. That just means more beer for the rest of the cult. name That's on you, dude.

Speaker: Ha, ha, ha. ah We got the last time I joined to kill I was 2019 coming away from the.

Speaker: The lab and life tour was always bands that I watched and shit. oh yeah And I just got lot of it too sick, so I can't do it anymore. Last time I last time i drank tequila, I was like 16.

Speaker: Surprisingly enough, it was the same time that it was the first and last time that I smoked weed when I was 16. not on the night Not on the same night. It was two different nights. But I was like, yeah, weed's really not for me. And then I was like, hey, let's try tequila for the first time and let's polish off a bottle. That'll be a great idea.

Speaker: And ever since then, I'm like, no, I'll have the occasional margarita or whatever. margaritas. I can't drink tequila. i won't i won't do it. I don't want to get drunk off of it ever again. I did my and did my dance with that devil known as tequila.

Speaker: Yeah. Right. Hey, MoDog, I'm with you. Both of our teams are killing it in college. Hashtag fuck my Browns. Hashtag fuck your Bengals. This is why I fucking wore this tonight because I knew we were going to end up fucking talking about football.

Speaker: Look, it's one comment. It's one comment. And your team's not any better. They're just as dog shit. Shut up. 49ers one day. Yeah, so far. We have 49ers. Birds are 4-0. Nobody asked Jersey. Okay.

Speaker: forty niners one yeah there yeah so far we have forty nineerss birds are four no nobody asked jersey for me a nines they can possibly the books tomorrow yeah the browns are playing the vikings in london tomorrow so i gotta get my ass up at like nine o'clock to watch the game

Speaker: white eyes Wow, you're going to disrespect Robert Platinum like that? The guy's trying to talk about how he got served by Ties and you're like, nobody fucking cares, bro. Nobody fucking cares, bro. Fuck your feelings. Fuck your drinks. Fuck going to Hawaii, bro.

Speaker: Nobody fucking cares. That was to you. That was to you. but that was to me. That was to me. Sure it was. Sure it was.

Speaker: What's the belts, Macy? Those are those are just custom-made nonsensical nonsense belts that I had made because I'm the champ. Because I'm the greatest podcaster of all time. Casey, chill. I mean, Macy, fuck.

Speaker: so Casey's my little sister. Macy's my niece. Fuck. Macy, chill. Wait, what? what yeah I know. It's confusing. Poison. Poison free? It really doesn't matter to me. Beers. I'm trying to get caught up.

Speaker: what i try to get caught up

Speaker: but Fucking shitbirds. Fucking Baltimore shitbirds. And the Eagles. I am indecisive. But the Eagles won, man. They won. They fucking won.

Speaker: Let's go. Ravens lost. The Philadelphia shitbirds or the Baltimore shitbirds. Guess what? No one fucking cares! but But no, it's it's Baltimore usually, really. I can't wait. i can' cause that's where i'm I can't wait until the day I go to Baltimore and piss on Art Modell's grave.

Speaker: I will fuck you up. You know what I'm a sign of fucking trash. No, yeah I can't fit you in a trash bag. So, or a trash bag. I have to get a fucking, what is it?

Speaker: The dumpster. I have to fucking put you in a dumpster. I'm going to get a trash bag and put you in it and hang it up in a tree and tell kids that you're a piñata and let them beat you with sticks.

Speaker: ah Come on, kids. Gather around. Hit the piñata. It'll be fun. Jesus Christ. it'll go fun

Speaker: those bra Yeah, you said you were going to do that at the wedding, but you were stuck on your phone. I was watching foosball. I sent that picture to Michael and he's like, what an idiot. What an idiot.

Speaker: one idiot

Speaker: I mean, I mean, I was losing all the way around. I showed up. Apparently, I was late, even though I was there three hours early or two hours early. no i don't know. I was i was late.

Speaker: I didn't dress up. I don't know. i was i was fighting to lose in battle that day. So was like, fuck it. I'm going to watch football. I'm not even drinking. I got to stay sober. i got to upload that picture of you just sitting on your phone. I'm like, oh, nice.

Speaker: Oh, aren't

Speaker: ain't you two just so precious in the chat? Thanks, babe.

Speaker: Anytime I live. To the fucking room, y'all. ah yeah ru oh they need they a couple they need ah they They need a They need a couple's name.

Speaker: like yeah yeah like ah You what I'm talking about? Why can't I think of any names? Like ah but yeah lu like Jennifer Lopez and Ben Affleck had a couple names.

Speaker: Or Brad Pitt and Jennifer Aniston. That's what was trying to come up with the other day. Well, her name is... I don't want to uh mosey atmosphere mosy mosey

Speaker: sarge sarge mosley

Speaker: what dumpster di murder dog watch your mouth but Don't trust her. My niece is in here, man. She's 12. How's the maggots, Michael?

Speaker: Amazing. Sergeant Jersey Dog. That's funny. That's their name. Jersey Dog.

Speaker: Sergeant Jersey Dog. Well, Britton, it's Saturday, Yeah, we gotta let people in here, unfortunately. Let's let them in. I'm already tired. of I'm already bored with you.

Speaker: don't gotta fuck. Let's let them in. bore me. You bore me. bo me dan did You dude. Did you lay down the ground rules for a certain chatterbox? Okay, so ah we have to be years or older yeah to come up but take them up on the board Oh, sorry. You cannot come up in here, darling.

Speaker: um Other than that, it's just talking bullshit. Let's go. The link is dropped. Pew, pew, pew, pew. Beam, beam, beam, beam. Wow, wow. guys know the drill. The link is dropped. If you want to come hang out and get on panel with us, you are welcome to.

Speaker: Let's go. We got Megan. Megan is the, are not Megan. As always, a person to my, that joined the show with me, Brittany, Jesus, I couldn't remember your name.

Speaker: You are in charge of the of the back door access. Okay. I'm going to entertain this. will entertain this for a second,

Speaker: but you know what i'm goingnna do if chickens bad

Speaker: You have the power. What's up, Megan? What's up, aviators? What did you say, guys? ah She starts out hot.

Speaker: How are you doing, Angel? I'm great. How y'all doing? Don't encourage the so I'm sorry, Bray. I heard the 18-year-older and I jumped on the fucking thing. so I don't know what else you said after the verse. I don't know.

Speaker: she She is allowed. She's 12. She's just not allowed to cut one hair. So I'll keep i'll keep it decent. Don't worry about it. She fucking knows what's up.

Speaker: I hope she knows what's up, but so now he sees that well i'm not um just saying and I raised her mainly. like since you like don't listen like well, sorry. That explains a lot. went wrong are you Came out of the womb. I held her in my fucking hands.

Speaker: And I beat the shit out of her fucking mom. I beat the shit out of her fucking whore-ass fucking mom, too. what you're saying is that you kidnapped the baby from the hospital.

Speaker: no No. That's how I read it. like That's how I understood what she just said. You're like a baby snatching little gremlin. Kidnap. Rescue.

Speaker: Rescue. Oh, I'm sorry. She said, my real mom. Exactly. didn't mean to say I'm sorry. ah the pain My mistake.

Speaker: but' like goodency up right no and there yes Robert I said too much I said too much I think you might have but uh yeah Brittany just want to ask you for my jersey back when you finished with it please the Ravens jersey I don't know if I'll drop you off I've got three I've got 14 uh Seahawks jerseys and three uh four uh remember this bitch

Speaker: and Clegg really Michigan? Yeah, I know, right? Look, Brittany, come on, be nice. I'm on your side with that one. I'm on your side with that one. Oh, thank you, Macy. It's a disaster area.

Speaker: I'm downsizing. But, yeah, that's all my Seattle stuff there. And this is all my Back to the Future stuff here. My room's pretty cool, too. It's a black background. um No, come on, Brittany. We've got to be nice to Glick. He's allowed one mistake in life, and he's wearing that one mistake.

Speaker: I don't have to be nice to that bitch. Are you to give me? Oh, look, I'm trying to be nice. Wolverine. Wolverine? What? That's my bro. Michigan Wolverines.

Speaker: and USC, right USC Trojans. Sorry, not sorry. Don't give me that look, son.

Speaker: like You know, i'll I'll give you a pass because you're not American and you don't know any better. And you you don't really know how to pick good teams. That's why you like to see chickens and Trojans.

Speaker: Oh, I know perfectly how to choose them. I mean, let's face it, any team's better than Michigan. And who's your college team? I'm sorry, not your your NFL team?

Speaker: Oh, the Browns, their ass. ah The Browns. Time out, loser. You are going to make fun of me for supporting the Central. And you're a Browns fan.

Speaker: All right. i'm going to. um No, I know the Browns suck. I make fun of them more than anybody else do. It's so easy to do, and if you can't make fun of your own team, Glick, what's the point, right? I will tell you that the Seahawks suck if they suck.

Speaker: oh You know, yeah, exactly. Black like my heart, black like my heart. Black heart is beautiful, babe. You're right, Jersey. That's good to see you. My heart is black as night. We got two Ravens fans in here. We got me, Sam, me. Let's go.

Speaker: um I love the Ravens, as I said, Brittany, because I love Edgar Allan Poe and Daniel Falale, who plays for the Ravens. Okay, from Baltimore, yeah. ah Daniel Falale, who plays for the Ravens, is from Melbourne, Australia.

Speaker: Well, was talking about Edgar Allan Poe. Yeah, no, I love Edgar Allan Poe and have since I was about eight or nine, I think.

Speaker: Cool. Awesome. Yeah. Anyways. Definitely. Angel, what the fuck are you doing, dude? Uh, drinking still?

Speaker: What? Why not? what what do now what do you What do you have? i want to talk to you. have Dos Equis. those sickies. Because we're gangsters. I went to work at 10 o'clock this morning. Because this will fucking open up at 10. 45 minutes later, she shows up, hands me a fucking strawberry plant.

Speaker: Because we killed the one. Hands me strawberry plant and fucking leaves. I'm like, what about my beer? A cigarette? She's like, go to my sister's. So I went to the fucking metal store. <unk> not Now, I'm on a three-day weekend. It's an elevator day weekend. So I don't go back to work till Tuesday. It's Sunday.

Speaker: Yep. Happy with that.

Speaker: so good Interesting. interesting Interesting. got a three-day weekend next weekend. I'm excited. How are you going to waste the weekend, Blake?

Speaker: What's that? I said, how are you going to waste the three-day weekend? Or use it wisely. you' always see he's always I'm to go on a road trip next Friday.

Speaker: Go see his new girlfriend. um so celebrate i' gonna celebrate and I'm going to celebrate Indigenous People Day on Monday. oh god and she did oh No, I was going to say something sarcastic, but I'm actually not going to say it. I'll save it for later.

Speaker: I'll save the sarcasm for later. No, no, please do. ah not no just I'll just stay quiet for a few minutes and then think about my list ma thinking chicken chicken rib Robert Platinum you're dropping gold in the chat what you rings what yeah chicken his mom took Tylenol so he's autistic and then she funded him out the window when he came out the womb chicken a rice broccoli dinner a fucking Airbnb that he stayed in for nine months

Speaker: another one the hang god the the airbnb you mean the womb with a view glick jersey man i hope there wasn't a view there's a view i do i do yeah do actually i do actually i do can i do that indigenous do it brenny do it you look like i i am uh i'm uh oh oh yeah yeah i did I have no control over that at all. I told you, Saturday night, when you're here, Brittany. You control the... No, I do have... I do. I'm like a quarter... I'm a quarter and just person.

Speaker: What up, lazy Jedi and hizzy? Let's go.

Speaker: That's what I got to do. I got to go in here and pin the... ah i gotta pin the Yeah, what are you doing?

Speaker: Well, you know, smoking meth. ah suppose Please don't. but Smoking meth, throat-punching hookers. That's how I get down here in the big old city of NER.

Speaker: gotten it's It's mandatory. you You gotta smoke meth to throat-punch a hooker. it's It's part of the rules. Jedi! gar would up down ah see see let's go I can get your fucking asshole.

Speaker: ah sir they took sorry Sorry, I don't mean to kill it. I'm doing it. Is Tourette's contagious? Did you give it to our b do our media center? Is that what happened? Our media center now has Tourette's because of you? but but Don't about Tourette's, alright? I got that shit too. Don't talk about that shit. I own it.

Speaker: I fucking own it. We were backstage and she was like, we were backstage as she was like He was like, oh, shit. Cat nipples and dog farts. Square root of seven is 45 and chocolate fudge ice cream. and It's hot outside. I'm like, what the fuck just happened?

Speaker: I baby spider running across my body. Oh, my God. um Get it. Get rid of it. Bye-bye. I was like, what the fuck is happening here?

Speaker: Jedi, you're not going to be the odd thing. Jedi, you're not coming in here until you fucking come in here. You can't come until you come in. You're not coming in here until you come in here, Jedi. Lucky you. I see dumb people.

Speaker: you're not cove in here until you come yeah yes

Speaker: like you

Speaker: but ah snap on but sounds like Dude, Robert, I'm with you. i want to have Tourette so bad. Mordog in Jersey, you know I love you guys on panel, and Daddy's home this week, so you guys are welcome on panel.

Speaker: No, what is wrong? No, a trance is not fun. It actually ends up hurting your body when you have tics. It does, because when you have tics and stuff, your muscles and everything tighten up and everything else, and it fucking makes your body sore afterwards.

Speaker: Well, my body my body is sore all the time anyways because I'm old. It's a different sore. Come on, you're fucking huge. You're fucking Sasquatch. Dude, I'm a third of your Wait, I don't have any dressing for that word. I think you can agree. the one The one picture we got of you and I together at Michael's wedding, it was not the greatest picture in the world.

Speaker: No, it wasn't. The size difference between us is insanity. but yeah I did lose a lot of weight, but regardless, I would still be way smaller than you, no matter what. lot that Yeah, you would.

Speaker: She's cute with a teet. I'm so tall. I'm just like skinny and my mom's the same. I just get it from her and I have health issues. so You can get them.

Speaker: But yeah, no. The picture Blick and I together at the wedding, I was like this big to his like. If one of y'all got that, please send it to me.

Speaker: What? I was like this big. man I was like this big. To his. Exactly. I'll try to pull it up on screen. i should have said I had.

Speaker: You know, if i I could have gotten away with a lot in life if I just said I had Tourette's. Why didn't I think of that? sir I'm with you, Robert. I'm with you. Fuck off. So that I could cuss out all my teachers. No consequence.

Speaker: I could blame my Tourette's on everything. Even today in life. I think I'm just going to start telling people i have Tourette's. Why don't you why don't you love chanceor ba right and been different send send it to me and I'll and i'll upload it. no yeah do i could I can send some more of that salty tasting. straight who hey He gets all the salty dressing he he he wants on the Lazy Glicks fan page. Shout out to our followers. Thank you guys for subscribing and supporting our

Speaker: Our adventure. Yeah. yeah Whatever. came crew new We're going to change the name of it to to The Adventures of Squatch and Default.

Speaker: She's tall. righto love her Macy said you're tall. Robert said you're tall and beautiful. Robert's the number one fan. and Robert Black. I'm over here. My dude.

Speaker: That's my dude. Glick looks like a lumberjack. That's exactly how he dressed up at the fucking wedding, too. I was like, what are you wearing? What do you people want from me? I had clean jeans on, I had my good boots on, and I put on pearl step. What do you people want from me?

Speaker: Like, Blaine showed up looking like a 1980s. Clearly, you've only had fucking flusas in your life the last fucking couple of years, and then actual woman. I don't know what that means, but i don't I don't know what that has to do with me dressing up. The wardrobe. The wardrobe.

Speaker: I've dressed like that in my whole life. He was like, this is nice. This is nice. It's clean. It smells clean. I think we're good. These are my nice boots.

Speaker: They were nice boots. but right He didn't look bad. He really didn't. But compared to what you asked for... I don't know what was... i you know what was asked you know what You know what I was told the dress code was?

Speaker: Business fuckable. Fuckable. Business fuckable. Business cash fuckable. Not a bad shirt. I came lumberjack country fuckable. I don't know. but Not to me because you're my bro. But...

Speaker: so Make sure you like, subscribe, and do all the things. Yeah, Jersey, let them know. You get a gold star. let's go. Yeah, 910 Grannies approve. Wait.

Speaker: No, don't you're not even on the panel. What are you talking about, dude? Like, share, and subscribe. Just like Jersey said. You sons of bitches. 910 Grannies. a Our approval rating amongst Grannies is amazing. yeah Somebody else hop up in here. We're waiting for you.

Speaker: My IQ only two digits. His IQ actually one digit, but he considers that negative sign in front of the one. He's a little dumb. Oh my gosh.

Speaker: You actually made a good joke. I make all the good jokes. You actually made a funny joke. He was dressed the fuck up, Moe Dog. I was, Moe Dog.

Speaker: I had a pearl snap on. I look good. I got a lot of compliments for my wedding attire.

Speaker: Lock it. I don't do suits. I don't do suits. i Like I said, red by my man, Blake showed

Speaker: up. I look good. Everything I wear, I look good. Whatever. whatever I don't know. I'm looking at George in the hat right now. I'm like, bleh. Don't yourself.

Speaker: Hmm? It's two digits with extra and negative negative 99. See, I like a fucking emo at the wedding. like I just learned about that, Macy.

Speaker: Clock it. What did she say? She said clock it. I just learned about that. Clock it? Yeah. My daughter's taught me that. Clock it. It's a TikTok thing. Six, seven.

Speaker: Duh. Wow. but Okay. You're fucking cringe. I have good grades this year, Brittany. Good job, girl. He made up funny. I did not go barefoot. I did not go barefoot, in Jersey.

Speaker: I could have. I should have. I should have showed up there. Hell yeah, Macy. She has on the good grades. She wanted to hear you talk more. She likes you. I don't know what that means. Kids are stupid, Robert. That's what it means. Clock it.

Speaker: Macy, fuck you. That's my niece. Fuck.

Speaker: Let's just say she's not old enough to be here, but she was raised by a monkey, which is basically the equivalent of being raised by monkeys. So it's okay. Macy, get out of here.

Speaker: I'm going to call your dad in a second. but Don't do shoes. but Don't be wearing no shoes. not this shoes That's real. Never mind. I can't fucking say I have that one. I'm weird feeling saying.

Speaker: Macy, get out here, girl. Get out of here. going to kick you out. Jesus. but I love you. I

Speaker: and know you listen to this all the time. Girl. New skis? Oh, my God. No, dog. Are you skis?

Speaker: <unk>ky back phone call yeah no uh i got brandon fucking skis when i was 12 we didn't even have the internet oh shit that's that's so that's that's element but stop like of in the microwave the grass is longer than the trees and then the more you bring it up the more it fucking happens which fucking sucks but andall shit girl on that shit own that shit don't be mad at it own that

Speaker: yeah sucks it hurts ah deep is thats all of a sudden Macy, to sleep. Get off my fucking podcast right now.

Speaker: She said back in my days. Shut up. You're 12, Macy. Back in my days. Exactly. Get off of here. Her dad and her... That's funny.

Speaker: Yeah. Her dad doesn't care. ah I would have to go and look at my original account. I don't i think I've had it since 2005. I love you. oh she said oh okay oh by good bye again bye macy it was nice meeting you mean yeah and yourself keep getting them good grades girl yeah yeah that's good grades keep it up love you and then robert plasminum also i've had this youtube account since 2006. plaster them robert blasted them

Speaker: robert b blasing um Oh, shit. Go, go. Your auntie love you. Your auntie love you.

Speaker: Your auntie love you. know you Hey. Okay. That's what's up, man. Love you, too. That's what's Love you, too, Robert. Love you. Love you. Love you.

Speaker: so much Hey, no shame in this man's game. He fucking loves you. And he's like, fuck it. yeah Britney's my bitch. He's going to get Britney. He's going to get his Britney bitch tattooed across his chest like like Tupac had Thug Life right across his belly. It's Britney bitch. Thank you, Robert. You're dope.

Speaker: ah but Robert's an OG around here, man. That's my guy. that's guy he's been for a long minute yeah he's been showing up so thank you robert and

Speaker: don't talk to my fucking niece again you brought her in here i know i was so worried about it too i was like amazing like i'll send you the link but like chill

Speaker: gang gang britney gang and ability gang bangs for like i mean wait what and and and and she that yeah

Speaker: hu you chi I don't know i how to do that. You said yes ma'am. be here I was gonna get a new song. It's really addicted to Britney bitch.

Speaker: Well, not sure. She's got, she's got to keep memory out addicted to Britney bitch.

Speaker: Are you referring to addicted to love? mo

Speaker: Where's that at? Oh, I see.

Speaker: Okay. Yeah. but I almost said Huey Lewis in the news and then I was going to make an American Psycho reference and do a little. But then I was like, wait, that's Robert Palmer. It's not Huey Lewis. And then that just wouldn't count into it.

Speaker: And if you haven't seen American Psycho, you wouldn't even understand what I'm talking about anyways. Probably one of Christian Bale's greatest roles. RIP Jared Leto at American Psycho. I was about to say what?

Speaker: I'm obviously sober. Why are you sober, Mo Dog? It's Saturday. i got your reference, Mo Dog. I know. Dixit to Love was huge hit in the 80s. It was.

Speaker: Whatever. Megan loves that click. She loves it.

Speaker: What? American Psycho? It's great movie. My son wants to watch it. my son's like My son's like, I want to watch that movie. and I was like, yeah, you should probably wait like another five, ten more years before you watch that.

Speaker: Wait, how old did you say it again? He's 12. 12. So like No, he's not ready for American Psycho. Have you seen American Psycho? There's a whole scene where he's having a threesome and he looks at the camera and he's just like, wow, he's flexing. Great arms on Christian Bale. He was clicking the hell out of those horses.

Speaker: but Maybe when he was 18. He's little bit older. Not quite 12. We've watched some questionable movies. I never watched the I never watched i I didn't even know it was a book I don't read books books are boring books are friends because you're fucking stupid you're me head that's why you watch football and you and that works I'm very sensitive I watch musicals I like rom-coms I like nice walks nice walks on a moonlit night on the beach

Speaker: like musical commercials with puppies make me cry my god i totally believe it too that's why i'm like fight me bro i feel like i'm more tough than you are you're a little softy i'm a big softy yeah genesis yeah man with uh phil collins genesis hell yeah it's also a great book in the bibble It's the first book in the Bible.

Speaker: Yeah. Hey, look who went to church camp. Look who went to church camp. Yes, she wasn't just bagging at church camp. She actually learned a thing or two.

Speaker: Sorry, can't give you a blowjob today. Gonna read the Bible. Gonna read the Bibble. typically Starting with Genesis. First book. and oh my god and on the first day click created like shut the up i hate you i don't like i hate you like said let there be like floors probably a good thing she can search

Speaker: probably good thing maan she has nurse

Speaker: Peter Gabriel? Oh, shit. Yeah, Peter Gabriel was in in Genesis. Genesis had a couple different... Peter Gabriel, was that something? forget the song, even though I went to church camp.

Speaker: It has nothing to do with church. It has nothing to do with church. Whatever. Yeah,

Speaker: yeah it shows that I grew up in church. Yeah.

Speaker: Peter Gabriel. Fucking asshole. Peter Gabriel. He was did evening really and something.

Speaker: There was sign language we did all, too. Whatever.

Speaker: I don't remember. But yeah, we learned that song in church camp.

Speaker: And... jeff the Also, like to but like the burning bush. The burning bush. You should see a doctor so you can get a prescription for penicillin if you've got a burning bush.

Speaker: Okay. I'm just saying. Herphosyphalitis? Probably. um Crabs? whos not No. Talk to Chris about that. Chris?

Speaker: No. Chris, you got crabs, bro? From Maryland. But, no. I'm not going to go there, but there's... And you're... You nasty.

Speaker: He didn't get crabs from Maryland. Son of a bitch. Got to chat with Tony Banks. Oh, hell yeah. Wait, Tony Banks? Like, wait, what the fuck?

Speaker: got's a chat with to thanks oh yeah but tony bag like yeah but the wait he's got a hancock

Speaker: no never mind i'm not no not never mind i'm thinking of somebody else sweet back got it i dated her what are you doing with him but journey what are you doing with him some things were things off here wait where's ron where's ron yeah i you know what i think i'm gonna leave because you know the last two weeks i haven't been here and the panel's been hopping i come back after two weeks and it's i'm stuck with yeah nobody wants to hang out with you maybe we're just gonna call it a short night maybe you know what i appreciate you britney for being the only one that wants to hang out with me you're a good friend

Speaker: And I know that if I had to puke, if I had to puke, you'd hold my hair back. Even though it would be a comic book to watch you like, oh, I almost got it. Yeah, literally. I'll just hold your hair with my with my finger toes. Is that cool?

Speaker: That's fine. Appreciate it. Appreciate you. Appreciate you, girl. Gotcha. Dude, when's your wedding happening?

Speaker: Whose wedding?

Speaker: Who's wedding? Moe Dog in Jersey? Yeah, sure. I'm not in my feels.

Speaker: Nobody loves me. Everybody hates me. I'm just going to go eat worms. All things are too explosive video to. yeah We've we've got to do it. but but yeah I specifically put this show is not meant for kids. And then somebody invites children into the chat. stop she she's gone now she godam though she's she's god damn degenerate she is that that's my girl macy's my girl but i know because her dad and the girl that he's married to and now like they do let them curse here and they're in the house she's 12 but you know whatever

Speaker: so i was like yeah he'll be okay with it i was like just ask your dad first and then i'll send you the link i didn't know she was gonna comment as much as she did whatever so he's from part of motorcycle club so and he listens to metal music so my girls they listen to metal Yeah, I have videos of them in the back seat. If Britt says okay, fuck Brittany.

Speaker: Brittany's the life of the party. I am the fucking life of the party, dude. Yeah, dude. Yeah, dude. Yeah, dude. Shut up. You so are, dude.

Speaker: but Fucking dude. About to make some dindin. And then if Britt says it's okay, I'm going to come up. Brittany's life of the party. sure. I love Dude, listen, dude.

Speaker: I'm down with no dogs. no vol I love me some MoDog. MoDog's been great since he yeah since he came up in the chatterbox and came up on the first the first show. MoDog's always been cool.

Speaker: Good people. He likes to talk shit, but I'm down with it. no ah Let's go. Dude. Yeah. but I do say dude a lot.

Speaker: Dude. Dude. Dude. What, dude? What can dude? Dude. Dude. This is going to be great, dude. What's him do? Let me tell you something,

Speaker: dude. I do say a lot. I do. Fuck. Dude. Dude. yeah

Speaker: That should be one of the fucking banners on me. Dude. Dude. Listen, dude. yeah Dude.

Speaker: Dude, bro. Dude, bro. Dude, bro, listen. He's a Marine. Of course he's cool. Yeah, true. He's Marine. I mean, not all Marines are cool, let's be honest. Just because in the military don't mean you're cool.

Speaker: True. Facts. A lot of Marines have the bonus points when it comes to IQ. Okay.

Speaker: But Marines are tough as fuck. I will say. Marines are definitely tough as fuck. And I will stand up for Iraq. Let's go. What are you doing, Cash?

Speaker: What are you doing? yeah Go eat so you can come up here, my Do you want to take a break? Okay.

Speaker: What are doing? Is it your new kitty?

Speaker: I was trying to figure out what Cash was doing. He's sitting at the dining room table. And he was just playing at the table. He's sitting at the table, not on the table. he was just sitting He's just sitting at the table eating hot Cheetos. He's probably stoned.

Speaker: uh he's black anyways did you say wait did you say he's black i'm pretty sure my son's not black i'll get you super happy for you guys you guys are like

Speaker: super happy for you guys you guys are lost i like fuck offs Moe Dog, get your fucking ass in here.

Speaker: Eat your food. Fucking scarf it up. You're a Marine. You're a Marine. You know how to fucking eat it fast. Like, come on. Eat that shit though i have

Speaker: shit. You know? You might be onto something, Brittany. That's the Navy. That's how the Navy eats. Not the Marine.

Speaker: Brittany's being racist. I got accused being racist today. Racist. Racist.

Speaker: There's no T. Racist. Yeah, racist. Eat it faster.

Speaker: Jesus. Hashtag eat it faster.

Speaker: you said it jersey thought you got a face me yourself

Speaker: Yeah, lazy Jedi, get your fucking ass in here before I kick your fucking ass. The default motherfucker.

Speaker: Brittany will show you how to go. Cause I'm like cocks. Fuck you.

Speaker: No, that's a turkey. don't get it. Oh, I love my way. Oh my God. You like to, you like to gobble. Whoa. Whoa. a well but whoa it's like man it vibrates his taint bro yeah dude and like just get out all you c one it's like vibration dig it yeah

Speaker: he digs it i do and it is' very and vibrates his taste bro yeah yeah but

Speaker: He doesn't get his fucking ass in here. Run, kids, run! Run, bitch, run! Yeah, you mother bitch. Yeah, get in here, you ass ass. Hey, make sure you get my you get mine.

Speaker: modog Don't be stingy with the purple crayons. Crayons. Don't be stingy. That just reminds me of the one cartoon with the Maya and the purple crayons.

Speaker: what I did a tattoo for somebody. It's something with the purple crayon. Okay. Google is good. You know, I could do that. I'm glad you're entertaining yourself over there.

Speaker: Sorry, my my audio wasn't working for a minute. Dude, i thought you were gonna I thought we were about to get wiener bombed on a fake account. I was like, My finger was on the chin. I was like, the hey we're about it we're about to get a dick at any time, ladies and gentlemen. Wait, wait, wait. Hold on. Hold on.

Speaker: Harold's in the purple crayon. Do you remember that? Yeah. Robert Puckman, were you in the Corps? Are you fellow Marine? Okay, did I?

Speaker: You get it now.

Speaker: Thank you, Brittany. I need that in my life. Thank you for joining us. sense Oh, shit. How do I change my... Took you long enough. I know, I know, I know. Is it because my 12-year-old... There we go. Now you got bombed.

Speaker: Now you got bombed. yeah No, no. Apparently, this was this was the... You should see some of the new shit, Scotto, came up for me.

Speaker: God damn it. Apparently, this was my avatar after being gone for two weeks. What? and i was like what the is that happening so scotto made a ah whole nother line of pfps for me that have me in cowboy apparel in the gayest possible way where is scotto i wish scott doesn't give me some pretty funny actually mean it's gross you know what robert platinum uh modog introduced me to the purple crayons and uh you know i'm a fan and and and

Speaker: And i'm I'm mad at some of my Marine friends for holding out on me this long. You sons of bitches. I thought we was cool. I thought we was cool. I thought we was cool.

Speaker: By the way, you guys are going to have to listen to my washer in the background. Shocking, Robert Platinum. The black guy likes the purple crowns. Is that like purple drank? ah You know that?

Speaker: It was pretty good. You got kicked out. Oh, shit. like the green paint. Yeah, that's what was saying. Yeah.

Speaker: in the kitchen making my sandwich her jedi's voice pop the boner what the hell it happens

Speaker: good happens yeah i did i I wasn't going to say anything, MoDog, but I'm glad you outed yourself like that. i was i was just going keep my boner to myself, but since we're sharing. yeah Glick just tucked his up into his waistband.

Speaker: You cracking heat there, Glick? Nope, just my dick.

Speaker: It's pointing due north.

Speaker: It's looking at me. It's creeping me out. Stop staring at bro. I don't like it when it's one eye makes eye contact with my two eyes. Don't make eye contact, you son of a bitch.

Speaker: Oh, did it just wink? How did it learn that? You're learning new tricks, little buddy. Oh, my God. Actually, a cyclops, if you think about it, they can only wink. They can't really blink. Wouldn't that be a blink? I mean, wouldn't that be a blink and not a wink?

Speaker: No, it's a wink. Permanent winks. Okay, so what about Medusa?

Speaker: Wait, what? Medusa when she found out. She had snakes for her. She had snakes for her. Yeah, that's what we're technically ti i was talking about. Dicks, snakes, one-eyed snakes, right?

Speaker: Yeah, that makes sense of this. That is what we were talking about. All right. peeping up for the conversation so I'm having a hard time. ah I said I wasn't getting drunk tonight. lied.

Speaker: gives not i mean, we have to after this conversation. So we're talking about Cyclops and Moe Dogging Glick's dick.

Speaker: And Medusa, she's got snakes on her head, and they're kind of like being a Cyclops and having a dick, but they're just on her head. um um I'm figuring this out. I'm walking through this because I think Brittany's onto something. i think she's onto something. Brittany's brain is a fucking labyrinth. Just trying to get to the center. Hold on a second. Is David Bowie wearing a codpiece?

Speaker: Is David Bowie going to pop up wearing a codpiece?

Speaker: It's fucking well, David Bowie. It's the babe. It's the babe. It's the babe.

Speaker: Thank you for joining us, Jedi. One of the DIs said that I was the worst recruiting ever seen. Jesus Christ, Robert. Oh, my God. This conversation is so relevant.

Speaker: It's out of control. I feel like I should start doing drugs so that I can understand these. Help me help you. Listen. Help me help you.

Speaker: Dude. Dude. Drugs are great, dude. Yeah, dude. Yeah, dude. Fuck you.

Speaker: What's happening right now?

Speaker: I'm pressing charges. making press say the Oh, shrimp. Let's go. Hell yeah. i say dude all the time when he's making fun anyone i you ohrimp know the band would tell you might be it's good he yeah Robert Platinum, that's a lie. You're black, first and foremost. I know better than that. Don't lie to me, but yes. I agree.

Speaker: Conversations about my D. nothing yeah well yeah Have I ever won? CPR. Or the harmless. so ah The Good Place. she No, we've already established this.

Speaker: Yes, she loves shrimp. And endless shrimp is one of her wishes in it. I fucking love shrimp. yeah dude totally dude you know blu you love shrimp but you got crabs dude i love them both i can love both dude listen dude man man man listen dave yeah man that's another one bad man Man, dude.

Speaker: Did you see that man dude over there by chance? that We call that a Sasquatch. His name is Glick. Let's go.

Speaker: See that man dude? and yeah Man dude. What's up? I prefer Sasquatch, but dude. Come on, dude. Let's go, dude.

Speaker: okay please Baby, baby, let's go. I got a tattoo. What does mine say? Dude. yeah You know what? Is that from Dealer's My Car?

Speaker: Yeah. What mine say? Sweet. No, no, what does mine say? Dude. No, dude. What does mine say? Dude. Dude. Dude. yeah and yeah black du listen you Yeah, that's a good one.

Speaker: Yeah. have it Chris, Chris, come here. Hi, Chris. Run Chris, run. Come here, fucker. Run, dude.

Speaker: Run, dude. Run, dude. Run, dude. Run, dude. Run. Dude, should do that thing like you're walking, but do it faster, dude. Yeah, dude. That's him. Hey,

Speaker: by going to start doing this now randomly and it's going to piss a lot of people off. It's Brittany. It came Brittany tonight. It just happened. It's Brittany, dude. i'm goingnna start doing this now randomly and it's going to piss a lot of people around du what du hear what i said' big is britney came for brittany tonight it just happened it's britney did It's Brittany, bitch.

Speaker: It's Brittany, dude. It's Brittany, dude. It's Brittany, dude. You got to make one for that. It's Brittany, dude. It's Brittany, dude.

Speaker: Brittany, if you were my woman, you would have an endless supply. Oh, my God. Or crabs. She's already got crabs. Do you want to give her more crabs? Yeah. Double the crabs? Let's go. Double the crabs, negative the Negative the IQ.

Speaker: I was going to say, Jeff, that is not even a problem.

Speaker: Fucking drink. Cheers, y'all. Wow. Stop, dude. Stop. Stop. Stop, dude. Robert's going need penicillin, dude. Yeah, dude.

Speaker: What up? What up, little dude? Yeah, dude. What up, little dude? Welcome. Oh, man. Fuck off, dude. Fuck off, dude, man. Fuck. Robert, that is not a mission you should accept if you choose to.

Speaker: Stay STD-free.

Speaker: my issue is robert by that is not a mission like it's not a mission you should accept if you choose to stay s twod three Yeah. ah so talk to good talk to Go talk to Jeff about STDs.

Speaker: They're not as fun as they sound. They're not as fun as they sound. Yeah.

Speaker: I have three of them. I got three STDs. They're 20, 16, and 12. Oh, my God. You fucking just said that. can't believe it. All right. Cheers to that. Cheers. Cheers.

Speaker: yeah right cheers that cheers We're drink away that memory. Cheers, dude. Cheers.

Speaker: Cheers, dude. Hey, man. Hey, man, dude. Hey, man, dude. Cheers. Hey, man, dude. Dude, man. Hey, man, dude. Dude, man. Hey, dude, man. going to use that, dude, man.

Speaker: Hey, man. Welcome to my podcast, dude. Hey, dude, man.

Speaker: I got to start opening my shows that way. my Podcast dudes. Dudes and do dads. and Welcome to my my podcast, This is Smooth Brain Central, dudes.

Speaker: Nipples, fudge, ice cream, cookies, rain on the hot sunroof. There's a car in the lake.

Speaker: I don't understand what's happening here. I think you finally gave Glick Tourette's 2. but

Speaker: Pretty fade. don't know which one, honestly. We got to get the dude incorporated in and in the fade. You're just talking and you're just like, dude. OK, I'm going to do it.

Speaker: I'm going to do it. I'm going to do it. I'm going to do it. I'm going to do it. I'm going to do it, dude. I'm going to do it, dude.

Speaker: I'm a dead dude. Just tell my girlfriend how great Saturday nights are. She's finally watching going, this motherfucker's retarded and his friends are stupid.

Speaker: Wait, what girlfriend? Exactly. Yeah, explain. There's no explanation needed. you are gonna He's ordering them in bulk at this point. thank you we've been talking We've been talking for a little minute. We've been talking for a little minute. Dude, what have you been talking about for a little minute?

Speaker: Life, dude, life, the weather, dude. Dude, man. Sounds yeah' paid favorite that's pretty deep, dude. yeah we yeah We're pretty deep. and She's an Ohio State fan. I'm a Michigan fan.

Speaker: Dude, did conversation is intense. Spicy. Spice it up. Dude, that's nice. Perfection. Long time listener, first time caller. who Welcome. world Perfection. that's chris Thanks for calling, dude.

Speaker: ah dude hey du run du here You guys broke my brain I can't stop. ah

Speaker: is the number one Mac daddy. but micy you Say it right Robert Platinum. Say it with your chest. I'm the Mickey Mac. Mickey Mac. that is That is slur behavior. That's slur behavior.

Speaker: She's got whole orchard worth of Adam's apples at his disposal. I take it back. She's good.

Speaker: and but no should wait hold on so like what got a whole orchard worth of fucking adam's apples at his disposal

Speaker: lorddo said wait i tell you back she's good She's a Buckeye fan. Oh, yeah, we've already been. Yeah, miggity, miggity, miggity, mack. Miggity, mack. Hey. I better be careful before we get copywritten.

Speaker: or I get in trouble for being a white guy. Cultury approach. Oh, you just invented your own language there. That's how Sasquatch speak, okay? That's Squatchian, motherfucker. That's Sasquatchian. Sasquatchian. I'm going to get canceled for cultural appropriation. with click You need to download Babbel. It will teach you. It's Glickle.

Speaker: Glickle. Glickle. he go light roll Go glickel your pickle. Calm down. See, we are family. See, we just did the same exact fucking thing, dude.

Speaker: Dude, this is crazy, dude. Oh, my God. oh i god I can't believe YouTube hasn't pulled this stream down immediately. It's not a good problem. ah but

Speaker: I couldn't get away with half the shit on my show, okay? That's because you guys are unimportant. No, I'm just kidding. i like mean like You know what? You guys get in trouble because you, you like, Canadians come up there.

Speaker: I was going to come in last night, and then I said, Steve, the Canadian was in there. And I'm like, fuck that guy. He needs a haircut. That's all I'm saying. He needs his life cut.

Speaker: Whoa. Calm down, dude. Calm down, dude. and and david Listen, man. Listen, dude. He's Canadian. dude but He's going to be the 50% dude. didn't know about 50% dude. Oh my gosh. They're real people, dude. ah He's from the deep north, dude.

Speaker: I like that show. The great north. That cartoon that has... The They're Canadians.

Speaker: It's the cartoon...

Speaker: Yeah, his name is Steve the Canadian. Yeah, well, I'm not Canadian, so I don't know about their cartoons. Or you're True, true, cultural appropriation requires roaches. No, we're not going to just culture-appropriate them. We're going to appropriate their whole country into the 50th or 100th. Are you serious? Can we just eliminate? Can we just drop nukes on their entire country? Oh, Jesus. Oh, there's my avatar. Damn it, damn it. Jesus fucking Christ. I forgot to change it.

Speaker: Oh no the swamp things are multiplying. Yep, yep. Oh shit balls. Fuck. Where is it? Fuck. Yes. Oh. Sorry.

Speaker: This is my threats coming out. Let's go. take a break. Maybe I guess. I don't know what he's doing. Like share, subscribe. Uh, apps. but chi hang Brittany just started panic clicking things.

Speaker: Okay,

Speaker: kind so this, if you're seeing my pics, this is my dress, guys. a Fuck you. um I like it. That's another one.

Speaker: That's another one. I say fuck off. Or no, I say fuck off usually. There's this one chick that I watch that has all these little like really big takes where she just screams or says random things and it's the fucking most entertaining shit ever. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

Speaker: And there is a... See, I'm sorry. There is like a documentary on one chick now. I haven't watched the full thing yet, but yeah, talking about it...

Speaker: Yeah. Is Brittany, I do want to ask you don't feel free to tell me shut the fuck up, but is there something that brings on any of your takes or is it just all random? things Anxiety, definitely lack of sleep.

Speaker: And then like when people bring it up. Oh. Yeah. So like this dude thing. It makes sense. If you feel your eye twitching and somebody's like your eye's twitching it makes it fucking twitch more. you know like it's like It's one of those things where you point it out and then you can't help but not focus on it. It's not terrible. It just like it just it makes my body stiff and it fucking hurts after a while. But I don't care talking about it.

Speaker: Fuck off. Fuck. Shit. See? You know Everybody says that when Glick's around. I think Glick brings it on from everybody. He he creates... head there busy Fuck off. Fuck off.

Speaker: ah god Yeah, yeah, yeah. Fuck off. Yeah, fuck off. That's the one... that When I say fuck off, it usually is to Glick. I know. yeah Excellent. an Excellent, dude. Excellent,

Speaker: i like too The snozzberries do taste like snozzberries. Man. Oh, my God.

Speaker: Smoke some weed, man. Oh, fuck. Oh, my God. Littery, man. Littery, man. I give up. I fucking give up. I fucking give up. I need to smoke some weed.

Speaker: Blick brings on the text. Shut up, Robert Platinum. Stop giving away all my goddamn secrets. I will poison your beard. He does bring up a text, but it's okay. It's fine. ah It's okay. Diddy dead.

Speaker: Does he? Dead. Dead. Dead. I did. Totally. Fuck off equals diddy party. Woo woo. Diddy party, diddy party. There ain't going to be no more. There's no more diddy parties for four years, okay?

Speaker: Ain't no party like a diddy party. Unless you come to a party. Thank God. There's a diddy party you can't remember. What are you talking about? ah a glick party makes a ditty party it looks like a look like a church prayer meeting bro bro whatever dude yeah okay i'm i'm uncanceable extra oh hello yep those are involved in glick parties they're usually bigger but he's got one right now keep some sharp yeah he has a tail attached to it too i do and if i stand up and push a button and tail spins and i can fly hell yeah dude fuck Oh, fuck yeah.

Speaker: Yeah, fuck yeah, dude. Fuck yeah, dude. Dude, my tail spins, dude. Dude, you want see my tail? really he said it Wait, Tailspin was a great cartoon back in the day.

Speaker: Tailspin's a great sidekick. Sonic. Or not Tailspin, but Tails. Just Tails. Yeah, Tails. yeah so Are you thinking about DuckTales? Wait, hold on a Tailspins? Are you thinking about DuckTales and not Tails?

Speaker: No, tailspin. On a skateboard? No, that's a kickflip. Both are ah two different things. where all just build up song We're all going smooth brain at the same time. and We're all trying to figure out what each other is saying. And none of us can articulate anything that makes sense. I'm the only one that's kind of sound.

Speaker: I'm pretty sure tailspin was a fucking cartoon. It had had the rescue rangers and all. um yeah ah Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah. Chippendale. Chippendale's Rescue Rangers. i don't think that and I think that's what it was called, not Tailspin.

Speaker: I swear to God, there's one called Tailspin. There's one called Tailspin. It's a Google box. As the French says, Google. I got it. It has Faye Bonet.

Speaker: Glick Party. requires mar andmers blue ah yeah first glick party is We don't talk about Glick Parties. modo you signed the waiver you signed the nda yeah consensual yeah everything is consensual everything is consensual at a glick party because i make everybody sign waivers before they come through the door yeah dude get it totally dude dude man dude man sign this sign here sign here sign here initially here uh i need to print finger and blood sample and okay you're good to and he wants he needs to taste your semen to make sure legit

Speaker: No, I have an official semen taster at the door. um jedi will yeah Jedi has applied for that job. I didn't want to tell anybody, but I think it's looking good. Jedi may get the job. yeah know he's He's more than qualified. the he does have He does have very stiff competition.

Speaker: Shaman's in line to get it to him. Jedi or Shaman? I'll give you a little little bit of a... I'll let it go.

Speaker: Dude bread slur. Okay. I'll let it go. Do you guys take requests? Yes, we take. Yeah, we can do long distance dedications as kind of request, dude?

Speaker: glu is blue is messed up lubric it really is you guys take requests yes we take yeah yeah we can do long business dedications as well

Speaker: what kind of fu did

Speaker: That's my Scotto. Scotto, I haven't gotten to see you in forever. Please come see me tonight. Scotto, let's Oh, Scotto. Stiff competition. 80s corn movie.

Speaker: Actually, you know, you might be better suited for the job. I'm just saying.

Speaker: When Jeremy when jemy when jemy summons... Jersey. mother bad. Where's your dude?

Speaker: misprouned i know but and i yeah where' that where's it tough dude where's it tough but words are hard get it right fathers are yeah but not as hard as me dude not as hard as me

Speaker: i I shouldn't have seen it coming. That's what she said. but those ill say that's No, that's what she snorted, dude. sorney co in the building Ladies and gentlemen, Snorty Cox is in the building.

Speaker: And I believe Jedi gave her that name. i think I think it was Shaman. I think Shaman did. Whatever. fucking it's so It's definitely... You're never living it down, though, Brittany. I don't care.

Speaker: It's fine. Whatever. I'll say it. My eye had literally... Do you funny is when it slips out? um Like, when you're not trying to be funny?

Speaker: Yeah. It's like... Totally, dude. I get it. Fuck!

Speaker: yeah Ass, ass, fuck, shit ass balls. Fuck you. Fuck you, dude. Yeah, Glick does have shitty ass balls, dude. I just washed them. And they're still shitty. you didn't do good Did you actually use soap?

Speaker: Nope, I used shit. You used hope. You used hope, not soap. I used shit. but watch I washed them with shit. i launched my balls from from down at the river you know because i'm a big foot and that's what i do feel like if they're stinking if the germs will stay away oh my god that bugs me oh my whole heart skydows here i love him so much but oh um my whole heart skys here i love him so much

Speaker: is he is he is he he's not here yet but want him to get on the panel he'll get on the oh shit oh shit i need another drink dude back in a minute dude all right how about we yeah maybe you want to do you want to do that if you want to ask can we um

Speaker: right have on yeah maybe you want to tell i wanted to eat yes but you want to we story

Speaker: I'm going to let you work through this. I'm going to let you work through this. All right. I'm going to go up and ask to take a break. Brady develops floor heads. it Quick, send out the bus signal.

Speaker: Can we take break, please? but man would bring are but Do you want to take a break? Do to take a break?

Speaker: Do you want to take a break? Okay, we're going to take a break. We're going to take a break, Dave. Dad, we're going to take a break, Dave. I'm going give you... oh Am I choosing? No, I'm choosing.

Speaker: like Okay, cool. I'm going to give you... my God. oh my god I need a break. You need a break.

Speaker: Yes, dude. I do. I need a break. You know what? I'm going to do a little Blacktop Mojo with their reimagination. I'm going to give you guys three minutes for a break.

Speaker: Check out Blacktop Mojo. I'm going to show the guys some love. And we'll be right back.

Speaker: you'll see What can make me feel this way My girl

Speaker: you say What can it be This way, my girl Talking about

Speaker: She took all money, me back my name, and she left me all alone, standing in the rain.

Speaker: I guess you'll sleep What can make me feel this

Speaker: There we go. My mic wasn't coming back on. What's going on, everybody? yeah We are back. What a voice. What a voice indeed. What a voice indeed. That is one and only Matt James, lead singer of Blacktop Mojo. Check him out literally everywhere at Blacktop Mojo.

Speaker: Also, check out Matt James. And if Brittany asks me to take a break again tonight, I will give you, because Matt James does solo work, I will give you one of his songs as well.

Speaker: The guy's got an amazing voice on him. Also, Pretty good friends. They've been really good to to us and and myself. And if they weren't so goddamn busy, they would have probably already been on multiple shows.

Speaker: If I tried to get my voice that high, my testicles. I i sing my ass off to that song every time. um don'ting up his I don't think I can sing like him, but in my head, sound just like him.

Speaker: Yeah, I'm sure. Blacktop Mojo is one of my favorite bands out there. place geneison Genius remake dudes. Yeah, that was a complete reimagination.

Speaker: This is live, flawed perfection. We are 100% live. Nice I'll

Speaker: post that link again, maybe. I got you, Dave. I got you, Dave. Yeah, Dave. I got you. It's linked it. I posted it. linkedin dead man listen listen man help it it ah see it he like that's scary no it dude i'm scared of you bitch i was trying to help i was trying to help your hiccups did oh i know they never had up right i right now know what you need to do to get you a big drink of water

Speaker: Bend over, touch your toes and swallow that shit.

Speaker: Seriously. like Bend over as far as you can. Get a big drink of water. Bend over. This is not weird. This is like what I do when I get hiccups. I also usually do a little wiggle because I'm in the shower room at the gym with all the other guys.

Speaker: line That's rec beside the point. That's beside the point. When I get hiccups, I'll get a big drink of water. And then I'll bend over as far as I can and and swallow it. And it forces open that flat in your whatever that's called. That gives you hips. Probably never. Probably never.

Speaker: Definitely weird, dude. You're not in a motherfucking thing, Jedi. Where are you? The fuck? We can get rid of your eyes. I'm getting rid of your ass.

Speaker: um ah

Speaker: No, I do need to grab some water. Dude, I can't hear you. What? Hold on one second. You're gonna have to carry

Speaker: Definitely weird, dude.

Speaker: Super fucking weird, dude. Yeah, dude. He went to go bend over, dude, so that he could touch his and somebody could give him a nice surprise, dude. Yeah, dude. looking like bending seriously fucking broke my brain britney with it all this dude i can't stop now you're welcome dude she's got it that's funny as would you like it scotta do you want to see him bending over he bought he bought front row seats to that he's got tickets all right he bends over oh i did not mean to do that whoa party foul

Speaker: yeah my My mouse clicked it. I'm sorry. He bends over as far as he can. Then Scotto appears and weirdly enough forgets about his hiccups.

Speaker: Fuck you, dude. I have hiccups right now. i hope How much are tickets? Depends, dude. It's negotiable. If you subscribe to the Glick and Lazy OnlyFans, it's $9.99 a month, dude.

Speaker: The hiccups will be the least of this problems. Yup. We got to up our prices, dude. Yeah, dude. 169 dollars. Oh my fucking God, dude.

Speaker: yeah then hundred and sixty i have outlet right

Speaker: oh my fucking aunt dan

Speaker: Oh my God. we we're joking about it so much, it makes it so much funnier when you say it for real without doing it. I don't

Speaker: know why. Yeah, dude, it does. All right. I'm going to keep it up. I'm here. I'm here. We can get canceled. Fuck it. Scotty, you like to play with it, dude?

Speaker: Jersey. Jersey. Oh my god, lazy. I don't know what- or not- lazy Jedi. What the fuck did call you? don't know what the- lazy. Lazy.

Speaker: Tell me whatever you want, dude. That's it.

Speaker: What? Pass. Pass. Sorry. Sorry.

Speaker: that yes ah sorry By D's dictionary. He's super educated, dude. He knows all the words.

Speaker: Oh my god. Oh my god. Oh my god.

Speaker: um Default dude.

Speaker: Hey Sasquatch, you look bummed like somebody caught a picture of you. What's going on? What's poppin'? I'm currently scrubbing the internet if I said picture. I was doing questionable things.

Speaker: We know, dude. Man, listen. indeed but squash does in the way and and What a squash does in the comfort of his own force should not be photographed.

Speaker: yeah And he should not be judged for. Same as what a Shrek does, dude. What a Shrek does in their swamp. Oh my dude.

Speaker: Click. Why the look on your face? It looks like your butthole's hurting. Maybe my butthole is hurting. Maybe I slept on Scotto's couch last night. And we all know what happens if you sleep on Scotto's Was it the casting couch, dude?

Speaker: Dude. I didn't know until it was already too late, but apparently, dude. dude

Speaker: On a scale of 1 to 10, how crusty was it, dude?

Speaker: I give it a crust rating of seven. He said he recently cleaned. Dude. That's like a Dave Portnoy right rating, dude. Dude.

Speaker: Wait, we so is is higher better or lower better in this rating system?

Speaker: Higher is always better, dude. Especially in golf. If we're going higher is better, then I'm going to give it a 9.5. It's high quality. Ooh. Crust to couch ratio? You were sleeping on some pristine, crusty protein, dude.

Speaker: Crust to couch ratio? On the money, dude.

Speaker: I think we killed Brittany, dude. I think we killed Brittany, dude. You bastard. You bastard. yeah master but

Speaker: it's a clock it's a coctionary come on get your sounds like a sticky situation dude get it get it my dad scott doesn' sounds like a sticky situation du that and that on but you make fun i me for this today you heard yeah like good time da yeah my dad I'm not your dude. I'm not your that's a amazing

Speaker: I'm not your dude. I'm not your dude. I call him padre. ah call him padre. I'm not your bruh.

Speaker: That's my padre, man. Oh, shit. I said man. but what Is your dad Mexican? hope His this wife is Ecuadorian. that' still't know Close enough. Is your dad Mexican? No, his wife's Ecuadorian.

Speaker: but Also, he doesn't speak like any Spanish. Is your dad Mexican? No, but my cousin has diabetes.

Speaker: like What?

Speaker: Speak Spanish, you fucks. Well, I guess if they speak Spanish, they're Mexican, sons of bitches.

Speaker: No, my dad is as white as can be. Yes. But I just say Podge. I just say Podge. I don't know. I'm too goddamn funny of a stream. I can't

Speaker: Yes, I just called my dad Podge. He likes Hispanic chicks. Like before his wife even. Like he dated other Hispanic chicks.

Speaker: Oh, yeah, I learned Spanish-ish. He just did not give fuck. You mean you can speak Spanglish? Yeah, yeah. Spanglish, basically, yeah.

Speaker: I can understand it more than I can speak it. Like, yeah, hearing my Padre's fucking wife's family from Ecuador speak, talking shit about us, oh, it gets me so fucking worth that.

Speaker: and like i watch because i can't understand most of it but i can't fuck speak back to them be yeah i know you I know you fucking said i just can't talk shit back in your native tongue.

Speaker: yeah that's why you fucking so shit exactly that fuck whoop dad and think i can say some things but it's like i i'm slower at saying it than i can understand it and it's not mexican it's ecuadorian so it's like a different dialect it's it's equis it's equislorian better off dude

Speaker: du but i'm so mo does that point i i don't i don't need to do the arming thing i don't like my dad's fucking wife. So she's a slurian. She's an equislorian. I hear that helps to take us by the way. Wait, you like her or you don't like her?

Speaker: I don't like her. Your dad's Mexican and he's in yeah, so wait, wait, what? Bro, dude. Bro, dude, man. Homie. Oh my god, my brain.

Speaker: Dude, buddy, homie. Dude, buddy, homie. You fucked me up. I'm smart. Not duty. I like that. that duty i like that Yeah, I like what my dog said. went to Ecuador. It was actually, it was a decent country.

Speaker: There were a beautiful scenes. I saw like a lot of volcanoes and shit like that. It was nice. But then you also see like a two-year-old walk into school on the dirt road with no, yeah.

Speaker: yeah love with that tree but you tricking laugh at now do you but yeah yeah da going she really just told someone of i think your is beautiful i'm fucking can hit you mo

Speaker: yeah in ecu in ecuadorent

Speaker: backward wow and i was the the only one that heard that ecuadorian i heard that get in ecuadorian that's still spanish does that mean i don't think they speak spanish in ecuador ecuoslor yeah they speak they speak british in great britain but they

Speaker: what do you want to request fall perfection is that you yeah make a request sure for thing And then subscribe to the Glick and Lazy OnlyFans and then we will do it.

Speaker: Okay. Fucking hiccups. Sorry.

Speaker: Everybody, like, share, subscribe. Oh, yeah. Do it. Do it. Do my hiccups. Fucking do it. Yeah. Nine out of ten grannies approve me.

Speaker: And the tenth one's a cunt, so it doesn't even matter. thing No, she's dead, dude. Oh, fuck. but Still a cunt. Yeah, to die. Way to die, cunt.

Speaker: Your granny's a fucking cunt because she died and didn't give us that head out of bed. She was such cunt, she couldn't even live. Fucking bitch. I can't. That's what I meant. i but I like this fun.

Speaker: Wings, everybody. Saturday.

Speaker: ah think that's where my hiccups are happening, too. One, slow down on drinking. and Saturday, and two. Brittany, did you even bend over and touch your toes? No, I didn't. I still haven't even gotten water. I'll be brief.

Speaker: Oh wait, i thought you were doing that before the break. I was trying to, he needs to pay attention. This is your show. Yes. Sorry. right Sorry. Sorry.

Speaker: Oh God. Brittany. love you so much. I mean, it's, it's, it's the Brittany network now, dude. Dude. It's Brittany's network, man.

Speaker: It went from neglect network but' more work the Glick Network. It was the Nonsensical Network. It was never the Glick Network. Well, yeah. shes none so But then it was the Blazin Network. And then.

Speaker: um Now it's. Now it's Brittany Dude Man Network. Man Dude.

Speaker: The evolution of this network is just astounding. Because then it was the Rock Network for a while.

Speaker: Fuck that guy. I wish he'd show up. I really heard that guy. He does a great job. i just He does a great job. i just so I just want to say, all you assholes in the chatterbox, right here, this guy right here below me, that's what a true friend looks like.

Speaker: Look at him. He's here. He's here hanging out. You fuckers, you've been here the last couple weeks when I wasn't around. Now I come around you guys don't even want to be up on the panel. Oh, that kind of reminds me of my show. the time Every time I was gone, you showed up.

Speaker: It was one time, asshole. It was one time, asshole. One too many, motherfucker. I didn't even know you were going to be there. I'm like, this motherfucker. Yep, you're like, Jedi's gone.

Speaker: Jedi's gone, so I'm going to show up. Whatever. And then radio silence from you on the show after that. Wow. Boom.

Speaker: Mic drop. Yeah. yeah but how many know You know what? Glick likes to bend over real deep so he can pick it up while he's down there. but you know what but you know what But you know what? I've been on quite a bit lately.

Speaker: You have been more. i I even did an after party with you. you i even i was even having I was even on TikTok acting a damn fool. and then i was like And then I got yelled at because, like, yo, Lazy and Shaman are on. I was like, what the fuck? Why didn't I get another notification?

Speaker: And I stopped what I was doing and jumped up in that show. And even though I got left in the backyard, like I wasn't a anybody of any importance. And then you wanted to do an after show. And and I was told, hey, yo, Jedi's doing it an after party.

Speaker: And he wants us to come up. I'm like, I got him. And then you left me in the backyard again. No, that doesn't even make sense. Yeah, you just left me. Oh, that wasn't that up. My fucking mouse died, so I can't even click do anything. Click it, say. Shut up, Paul.

Speaker: click yeah do anything we could say shut up for He wasn't complaining last time I got the hiccups.

Speaker: a Yeah, yeah, yeah. Scott is not the only gay one. Never mind. Glick's coming out loud and proud, bro.

Speaker: oh go i am gay I like to double my chances on by-squash-ful.

Speaker: He does some interspecies stuff. No big deal. I do some weird shit. I do some weird shit on the side. Hey, money's money. day He don't discriminate amongst primates, okay? Just because he's a Sasquatch where humans.

Speaker: Discriminate against primates. That fucking rhymes and I fucking love that. Yeah, he did it on purpose. I know. Lazy Jedi's like, he's a fucking champion.

Speaker: He's a poet and he didn't even know it, Brit. No, he fucking knows it. He's a fucking champion. Those hashtags are like...

Speaker: and and Lazy Jedi is a... Here, I'll do this for you. There we go. see See, Britney rewards everything I do with that.

Speaker: I'm sorry. I love you. You're the best, Brett.

Speaker: What did you give us to? Glick's just fucking here, you know? yeah I'm just here. You just touch this pose whenever it suits his purposes. 20 bucks is 20 bucks at the end of the day.

Speaker: What are you guys doing? Num, num, num, num, num. Num, num, num goes a long way. Num, num, num goes a long way. Yeah, I went to the dentist the other day and he's like, I'm going to numb you up. And then next thing had a I know, num, num, num, num. I'm like, I don't think that's the other thing he's numbing.

Speaker: And then he gave you a protein shot. Yeah, I gave him a protein shot. and His finger went up. and It was mutual protein shots. I didn't know that Dennis was going to check my prostate. but This

Speaker: Oh, shit, son. Hey, hey, buddy. That was little cold. You could have warned me. Put the dildo attachment at the end of his drill, then you know happens. Hey, a D. Walt action.

Speaker: Andy? I like a Ryobi. Oh, shit, we got Mandy in here. Mandy, you got to get up here and save this pan. Yeah, Mandy, get up in this bitch. what I give up. nobody never I'm never doing a Saturday night show. but Mandy, get your ass up in her. But I like a Ryobi. I see i see i seen this pan. I'll be popping in the last two weeks, and then I come back, and I'm stuck with Brittany and Jen.

Speaker: yeah the best people will i mean let's go we're more yeahs i mean if we can do this all by ourselves i mean i mean i was picking an all-star cast i would definitely my number one overall pick would be britney and jedi yeah they said you could only pick one and i say i make the fucking rules it's glicks world and you bitches are just living in so my number one pick is britney and jedi Hell well i remember i mean andy I think you're saying that because just not good with numbers. You don't know what one means.

Speaker: Shut up. You might be right, but again, it's Glicks World and you fuckers are just living it. Wait, one on each hand. That means I can pick one for each hand. Yeah, I got the one.

Speaker: And it makes a big one so I can pick two. Yeah.

Speaker: Hi, Mandy. How are you doing, love? I love you. Is that the signal that we're going dock later, Jedi? I mean, maybe. If you see it up in the sky like the bat signal, you know it's not like Dr. Kong. I know it's up. No, we're not. we're having it we're having We're having a pre-show meeting before we go on to Lazy Glicks.

Speaker: Jedi. You guys are not so cool now. And you know what? Yeah, dude. Totally, dude. yeah mean tell it What's up? Okay. Mandy's already regretting coming up. She's like, okay. what Oh, wait, my smoke detector is going off. I got to leave by. That's why I took a moment to bring her in here because y'all were just doing your little...

Speaker: No! Don't you put that on! Don't la better you that You hear jealousy dripping from her voice. Yes. Jealousy. Okay, I got you back, Britt. She's not dripping from her. I was like, fuck this. I'm done listening to this, dude.

Speaker: Shut up, Brittany. You're controlling the back door tonight. You let people in. How much do we have to pay her for that? wait how many um should we have to pray her for that I don't pay her. No, they they don't pay me shit. Oh, she loves the back door, so you don't have to pay her anything.

Speaker: Yeah, Brittany loves the back door, dude. I'm regretting bringing you in here, you little bitch. but yeah so to get You to target.

Speaker: do miss yes

Speaker: That's my older sister. That's my older sister. Brittany, dude. Gatto's doing some marketing for us, okay?

Speaker: She'll call it Glazy Lick after show. That is kind funny. that is kind of fun if we do If we do it after show, Yeah. awake

Speaker: ah do yeah just want to do it I just want to do a one-off show with you and we call it the Glazy Lick. um talking Just don't ask Jedha what he does with his sword in the after hours. Oh, you got a picture to find out.

Speaker: You are a sister, shirt and you're not bugged by hearing this? Like, are you fucking kidding me? She's not my real sister. She adopted me. She found me. And then she was like, ah you're my brother. No. Is that really? I regret almost every day.

Speaker: ah I love how she says it so sweetly, too. I regret it every day. Bless your heart, Glick. Go back to the wilderness where you kind of belong. Brittany, there's somebody knocking at your back door.

Speaker: They would like to come in. Knock, knock, knock. Knock, knock in real life on the down below. Jesus Christ. What's happened? What? You said what? What?

Speaker: what's happened quite we said hot the oh my god britney i got it know oh shouting oh this this motherfucker this guy um yeah i came i came for the request i came for the request what's up what's up yeah yeah who's requesting

Speaker: It's long distance dedication. From Florida to Ohio, from Shaman to Glick. It's a little bit of, when I think about you, I touch myself. Hey, that's a good song. Every time I hear it, I want to watch Austin Powers.

Speaker: the and kind Anytime I hear that, I touch myself. That makes sense. It's more of an instructional song. Yeah. um like I full-on prison-grate myself when I hear that song.

Speaker: That's too far. I slap myself in the face. I call myself a dirty whore. Dude. Oh, Shaman, you're going to love this. Shaman's fucking me up because I keep thinking that Yeah, I know. but it's The picture is shocking me, not man. You know what really fucks me up? When I go on certain panels and like that but like everybody's PFP is a picture of me as Shrek or a fucking cowboy or as something else.

Speaker: I've literally been panels where it's full panel, everybody goes PF like that. And it's, yep, yep, yep. I've been on panels where it's nothing but fucking Shreks of me. We should do that at the same time. We did that at the same exact time.

Speaker: See what I'm saying here? Don't worry, Jenna. I will never do that to babe. Thank you, Mandy. You're the best. I love Mandy. I love Mandy. Not only because she's the funniest person I've ever met, but she's just awesome. God, if I'm the funniest person you've ever met, you've lit a tragic life. Lazy's the biggest liar I've ever met.

Speaker: Oh, wow. There's a lot of bad stuff going on here. We are having a ball. Damn it, Scotto. Damn it. Scotto is the fucking mastermind behind my mental torment. He is the mastermind behind my mental torment.

Speaker: I just want to know why Scotto hates me so much and he won't come up on panel. And I also want to know, how do I get the PFP treatment? I just want to be i just wanna be a part of the toolkit. Scotto, I have a request for a PFP.

Speaker: Can you make one that actually makes me look good? but Something that makes me look good. He's not a magician. I know, but I want him. He kind of is, though. he kind He's not a musician.

Speaker: He's not a musician. What was that clip with that chick talking? Yeah, that's what I was thinking about. no I'm not a magician. Yeah, you are a musician.

Speaker: very Like, I don't do magic. signal I said you're a musician. Like, I don't even know what that means. jedi Jedi is a magician. You should see him make a disappear cock.

Speaker: Or a cock disappear. Wow. It's weird to be dyslexic and gay, isn't it? Yeah. I don't know.

Speaker: yeah i don't ever shows up like that yeah i don't know it's good but no so like be like yeah you got make me a completely white square i would love that thank you it's the only way that would work and i i accept that just make a square that's white and send it to the scottos Or a plain donut, because that's his butt hole.

Speaker: Trust me, his butt hole does look like a plain donut. Wait, what? My butt hole's square and white? It's like on Minecraft? You you your want some photos? like you ah is that your Is that your subtle way of asking for photos of Luke?

Speaker: Surprise! Here's my dick! Surprise, bitch. Wow, how'd you zoom in like that, Glick? Surprise, motherfucker.

Speaker: but but Honestly, he's not

Speaker: seven flat it's sorry i'm gonna be honest

Speaker: but asking um want to re remind that back and not say briney you girl got touched up um i'm gonna be honest Both of you are saying the most weird fucking dyslexic shit I've ever heard in my life tonight. This is the tag team champions here. Right? Turrets is contagious.

Speaker: You have- Brittany, Britt, Britt, Britt, we need you to come to Ohio again and and and we'll get a picture with with you and I since the Jedi just called us the tag team champs.

Speaker: We'll get pictures with you and I holding the belts together. So calm down, it'll be me like twitching. And i promise you're going to be holding the belts upside down because you're all fucked up.

Speaker: I hate to bring it to you, but I'm pretty sure the belt is bigger than Brittany. so So I could literally hold the belt up and she could hide behind it. you wouldn't even know she was there. i could just take a picture holding the belt up like this and say that Brittany is here.

Speaker: Yeah. Yeah. Thanks for that. Oh, no, I'm man. yeah earlier Kind of like earlier earlier when you're just like, there's me. Oh, sweet and Danny and sweet and blah, blah, blah.

Speaker: And then there's just walks in like Hulk smash.

Speaker: Sasquatch smash. That's basically what it was. Like, literally. I'm like, what the fuck are you wearing? Ty, Spork. Why are you so goddamn small?

Speaker: Why are you so goddamn big? Oh, touche. Touche. I was born that way. I don't like saying that.

Speaker: You shot me for having my back, bro. I was born this way, bitch. Maybe it was Maybelline. Maybe. Are you a cover girl, Shaman?

Speaker: ah you a cover girl chairman

Speaker: Maybe. Maybe. maybe paperly Maybe. Maybe um they believe me she like yeah probably believe a million and this just bought visit

Speaker: that kind that was kind of the sexy Is it weird that I have an app owner right now? Yeah. Rick had to put it back in his waistband again. just got it out there. Now he's got to put it back. Stop staring at me.

Speaker: We already had this conversation. It's weird, bro. It's weird. it's back It's becoming interesting. and might have to go off the screen for a second.

Speaker: Where's my fucking chapstick? Blah. Where's the chapstick? I'm here, see that video? Brittany's looking for a chapstick, okay.

Speaker: She made a song of it, that was amazing. We just let Brittany Brittany. We just let Brittany Brittany. Yeah, you gotta let Brittany Brittany. I love that. Brittany Brittany is the like focal point of the show. I think it better than Brittany Brittany.

Speaker: that actually should be smart Oh my time being here? No, it's pretty par for the course. Yeah. Mandy's been around for time. being here yeah i do like it's pretty par for the course yeah yeah i'm sorry i never know no mindy mindy's been around for yeah a long Yeah, I know that but I'm just saying if you've never heard Brittany snort then you it must be your first time here yeah all yeah wearing her smart Over idiot fantasy football

Speaker: what um sport but time sh how is the football going for you glick i am three and one fantasy football Tune in tomorrow, MK, and ask me that question. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Hey, you an early birthday? Oh, is MK here? What up, MK?

Speaker: MK in the building. Oh, that's a really... That's a happy blanket. And it's from... No, I'm... Ah, there he is. There he is. My favorite.

Speaker: I actually love that blanket. That's fucking awesome, Brittany. That's pretty cool. It is by far... Brittany is by far the worst door person of all time. You know what happened? That is pretty bad.

Speaker: Hey, hey. You're the worst door person of all time. I've had to let our last three guests go. Oh, dude, because I was trying to show my fucking... What's up, you slores? sex You son of a bitch. Sucking Jersey. dog Mo dog.

Speaker: Shaman. Brittany. How you doing? How you doing? What's up, baby? You're like a little Georgia peach.

Speaker: Cheers, Brittany. Yeah, cheers, bitch. What'd you take by my mama? this what you

Speaker: I was out driving my new, uh, my brand new dyslorian around. yeah back Did you go back to the future? I did. Did you go back in time? When you get there, tell Megan to shut the fuck up. I drove it 181 miles. Okay. So I gotta, I gotta, gotta give, gotta give all the love in the world because don't have, I don't, I don't have it in me to just be an asshole.

Speaker: to Megan. and the what I spent like two hours doing that last night on the stream. yeah and it it was like yeah but and me knew that me i'm Yeah, was like... I'm not calling out. I'm giving you all the love in the world for this because the one night she was up here and, God, I just wanted her to fucking go away and Brittany was like, bye, bitch. Bye. I told Brittany, I said, from now on, you have 100% control of guests when they come up. If they don't come up, if they're allowed to stay, whatever happens, happens.

Speaker: Because she fucking... And she's done it four times since. And it's funny because she'll drop her and Megan will sit in the backstage for like an hour and be in the chat.

Speaker: He's like, we're not breaking this up. I don't want to talk too negatively on a person, but yeah, she is very accurate. Brittany, make sure you do that shit when Bradley comes up, alright? That fucking band hammer.

Speaker: but Nah, okay. He's done that. I like Megan, too. I like Megan, too. I do give her a lot. I'm really mean to Megan, but she's mean to me, too, it's fair.

Speaker: So it's like a one-to-one ratio. It's just like she tries to take over the whole motherfucking thing. Yeah, I like Megan. try not to be mean. I like Megan in the chat. I don't like Megan in the chat.

Speaker: and don't like megan page you got Watch your fucking mouth when you talk to someone. Better show that man some goddamn respect.

Speaker: um go He'll bid you over and cure your fucking hiccups. You know, those hiccups were gone before I got on the show.

Speaker: mo i so you notice glick's pickups were gone before i got on the show just wanted to point that out He's like, I didn't even know I had fucking hiccups. Thank you very much, sir. Breathe, Brittany. Breathe. She thinks all the oxygen is running out and she snorts it up all at once.

Speaker: Drain a pool in 12 minutes. God damn. That's not a slow day, bro.

Speaker: drain drain a pool in twelve minutes got damn twelve that's kind a slow neighbor Oh, look. Her tism's kicking in.

Speaker: Watch out. You know, it is impressive how long she can hold her breath. That's got to be a plus. I don't know, though. She breathes through her ears.

Speaker: she bres their gear

Speaker: this i

Speaker: It's funny because I do have Claude. When he's bending over for the hiccups, he sucks in the oxygen.

Speaker: It's funny to see Glick with the Jedi PFT. I don't think it's funny at all. Anything about that PFP is funny. It's the worst PFPF and you're all dickheads.

Speaker: I'll bring it back. in it a my mine's not You know, he just went to go cry, right?

Speaker: but one a good he went off camera so he could he likes it don't don't buy that Don't buy into this and I'm butthurt about it. He secretly fucking loves it.

Speaker: And then he's going to send me the video later. Yeah. He'd be like, Shaman, I was just over here making content, man. I'm a content creator. I had to add some. I had to add some of own fans for a minute. I just content created all over my keyboard.

Speaker: um i just i just I just want you guys to know Jedi's okay. i comfort him I comforted him. I gave him a brand new butt plug.

Speaker: This one vibrates and it has a tail on it. awesome um So Jedi's feeling good. it white? Does it match his complexion? He prefers the black. he prefers the black i yeah I'll go off screen so I ain't smoking on your panel.

Speaker: No, you can smoke on my panel. What are talking about? This is fucking talk. We can smoke a drink. Yeah, does. What the fuck? Yeah, I feel your spirit.

Speaker: Yeah, you can smoke on the panel, MoDog. Yeah. Yeah, i know. was picking a booger out of my nose, man. You can do those on the panel. Do that on the camera and then show it. I just did it and ate it, man. Bro, you're allowed to pick your nose on camera. Even my boogers taste like purple crayons, man.

Speaker: oh like what yeah I did. I burped him. That way he was he relaxed the sphincter. And then once it was relaxed, mid-burp, I...

Speaker: Slip it in. Yeah, my boyfriend, he picked his nose. It's not, it's it's not, it's, uh... Jedi, you're on fucking panel. Why are you secretly typing in the chat?

Speaker: What the fuck is wrong with you, man? Yeah, know. He's a weirdo. Fucking weirdo. Fucking tarred. What the fuck? do What What are you doing? yes Purple tastes like grapes, Ty.

Speaker: Come on, man. I didn't say that. What? What? Oh, you got the grape flavor? I got foam. Yup. yeah Yup.

Speaker: Yup, bro. Unless I got screwed over. What the fuck, Sean? That's what they issued me in boot camp, man. I'm stuck with it. Hey, Sean, what's your favorite color?

Speaker: Clear. Clear. That's a hue. That's a hue, not a fucking color, man. That's racist. That's racist. I don't see color.

Speaker: I don't see color. I'm colorblind. Brittany, are you paying attention to the chat? I think somebody needs to be backstage. Just saying. Okay, wait. Just saying. Wait. He's backstage. um but and inspect oh Jedi said he's going to go hang down and chat because it's cooler.

Speaker: It's cooler down there. wow Wow. It's poo down there because all the hot people are up on stage right now. That's right. yeah gives me Shut up the fuck. Shut the fuck up, Shaman. You don't even show your face.

Speaker: And it's still hot. and a bit He's not allowed. It's part of the witness protection. Shaman is too sexy to show his face. yeah Yeah, I'm in Jehovah Witness Protection Program.

Speaker: Nah, bullshit. I don't believe it. All right, Britt, let him back up. You know going start crying. He's going to get all bent out of shape and shit. I got done crying, and now Brittany made me cry again.

Speaker: yeah Don't worry, Jenna. I got you, sweet Jenna. Way to be on that guy. He's going to send me that video later, too. Oh, damn. Okay, Brittany, I'm done with you. Come to pop a glick.

Speaker: so Come to pop a glick, sweet Jenna. Come to pop a glick, sweet Jenna. I got you. Come Just like ah just like ah Journey just like je said, open arms.

Speaker: Dude, would like Jedi. Open arms, tight thighs. Lazy Jedi would just have a little teddy bear in your arms. just like slowly Most not everybody most everybody is a tiny little teddy bear in my arms yeah When I need a alone time, I just climb into his beard. I wouldn't be, and I don't want to find out. Close the shutters. Nah, his beard doesn't look that great. Oh, yeah yeah. We don't want to find out. Like, we haven't had our moments.

Speaker: Shut up, fucker. Shut up, man. Shut the fuck up, man. Oh, yeah. Shit. Jersey's here. Oh, forgot. Damn it. Oh, boy. He didn't say nothing. He didn't say nothing, Jersey. We'll just edit that part out. Edit it out. Edit it out.

Speaker: i don't know i don't know La la la, nobody heard anything. Dude, dude, it didn't even happen. to Dude, dude. Hey, Shauna. What'd you talk about, dude?

Speaker: What's up? I'm surprised she didn't put that. Dude, it doesn't even look like it. I'm surprised she didn't put that touching tips icon in there. Why don't you come say it to my face?

Speaker: Bitch, bitch. Bitch, bitch. We hold each other. we hold each other and eat purple crowns and cry over our terrible NFL teams, all right? Jersey, leave us alone. Scotto said he's going to come on, Papa Glick.

Speaker: There you are. new That's why he's got the streaks in his beard. got oh Because of Scotto. That's why Scotto won't show us. Those are the Scotto streaks.

Speaker: They're national landmark. It makes us feel better about our shitty NFL team's jersey. Don't judge us. sort of ti sport a fucking man brother so but it's

Speaker: yall are crazy i love you it's an ohio football team thing man okay we have to endure the fucking pain every season duky was that No, that was Penn State. That's in Pennsylvania.

Speaker: i Ohio played today, right? Was that yesterday? They're playing right now. 21-3. They're up on Minnesota. Minnesota. Oh, shit. Jedi's like, fuck sports ball. Fuck this ball.

Speaker: oh shit gave a shit about so vi upset right now jedi is like fuck sports ball fuck this yeah I don't like sports, but I like the boys in the tight, tight pants. I'll be your towel boy.

Speaker: the Okay. Okay. I hate baseball. I hate baseball because it's boring. It's boring as fuck.

Speaker: Unless you're actually watching it on TV. It's boring as fuck. But those hot ones, the banana dudes that like shake their booties and shit like that. Yeah, fuck yeah. I'm about that.

Speaker: ah yeah i Fuck yeah. that boy baby like brand some shit like Fuck yeah, They got one, but it's a community college.

Speaker: Okay. I'll take it. Yeah, well, the whole community can get it, so. Yeah, you know what? Community is the most important thing. Community. Taking care of the community is important.

Speaker: For sure, right?

Speaker: Man, I'm watching Colorado and TCU. don't give fuck to that. and So tomorrow's the Ravens and Chargers. Oh, that's so Raven.

Speaker: Raven. She's less, man.

Speaker: I mean, that doesn't surprise me. and Whatever. I don't care either way. But yeah. Ravens. Let's go. you got a shot for me. That's so Raven I did I used to have watch that show It's the future I can see That's my shit i That was like one of the shows my dad would let me watch because like PG-13 things were like blocked so I could watch That's so Raven It was the only show with would black people allowed to watch No, either that or I Hate Chris

Speaker: Every time I'm starting space out, Brittany does her thing, and then I'm back in the action. Thank you. Let's get it. Get it. Get it. Get it. Get Get it. Get it. Get it.

Speaker: Everybody shut up while she does that. Okay. Yeah, watch Glick. He does not know how to do it. He's trying to do it at the wedding. He's like...

Speaker: Luke has cerebral palsy.

Speaker: a yeah Too far, bro. Too far. You realize now all the all the viewers with cerebral palsy have just unsubscribed to you now.

Speaker: Well, they will. They can actually click properly. All three of them. No, we're going to get so many more followers. It's going to take 20 minutes to hit the right button. They're going to do it, my friend. I'm just like you.

Speaker: I'll have it, too. My mouth fucking sucks. Flick is bringing people together. I'm bragging. bring together remember that perhaps so cre Who's got the zoo in the background? It was a spider monkey. I definitely heard a spider. That was me. Everybody shut up. thank That's the bird.

Speaker: mooc That's you. It's not me. Do you think I can get my fucking voice that high? Come on.

Speaker: Hey, you sound like you got range, man. You sound like you got range. I'm just thinking about like one of the opening scenes of Ventura where he like jiggles his keys so all the animals go in hiding when his landlord checks on his apartment. And then he does the thing and they all come out again.

Speaker: I feel like there was some signaling going on.

Speaker: Rally up my fucking animals. Let's go. wonderglick twin mate in the form of oh i have hiccups

Speaker: in the form of ah i'm going we want yeah look at me i up i have hiccups

Speaker: please do not bring that yeah Hold on, i'm coming but I'm coming. What up, Mandy?

Speaker: Mandy's giving a second chance. Do it again, Jedi. Do it again. Was that awkward for show and tell when you did that? I didn't think y'all wanted to hear that. tell Tell us. Tell us. tell Oh, no. I mean i didn't think you wanted to hear me throwing up. oh yeah. No, no. I mean, why not? just throw What are you throwing up for? What's wrong with you? Why did why do you just make assumptions?

Speaker: like yeah I mean, you don't know. Yeah, i yeah no. No, I'm okay. I've just been dealing with a migraine today. I have a sister-in-law that I

Speaker: tolerate and she has this friend that every time she comes over she wears enough perfume for about six people and it's triggered a migraine oh come on don't act like you don't know people that wear too much perfume or cologne well i mean since since we all missed it i mean here we go hate no um drop you off and a don't keep fucking do that yeah please don't do that done shit fucking around and actually made yourself throw up no i've done that before trying to be all fucking funny yeah as then then you got a little throw up in your mouth know

Speaker: oh shit okay let's do it subject it's not It's not the worst thing shaman has in his mouth on oh mouth. Oh, there was a mental I didn't need. Hey, okay, Mandy, if you picture shaman, how do you think he probably looks?

Speaker: guessing it no no wrong answers no no offense taken okay

Speaker: i'm curious because i have have actually seen him you've not seen shaman i've seen you i've seen you one time didn't shut those curtains tight enough, did you, Shaman? Whoa, Shaman. I thought, you know, that's why now I put the towels over my security cameras on the inside whenever I mess it up. That'll learn you. That'll learn you. Shaman, what you guys don't know about Shaman is... When, it was a couple weeks he actually showed... What you guys don't know about Shaman? I don't think you guys were lying. Shaman is...

Speaker: Shaman is 3.3 and a half feet tall. child He has one arm. Four legs. He has three actual legs, but then he has a bonus leg.

Speaker: It could be because he's a midget that he has a bonus leg. It's probably not that big, but because he's extra small. It looks bigger than small hands. Yeah, yeah, yeah. We'll just call it a kickstand.

Speaker: yeah and and he's up i yeah any any he And he has an overbite and a weird afro. And he has no gag reflex. Don't ask me how I know about the gag reflex.

Speaker: And a serious hiccup problem. he's He's always bending over to get rid of it. Talk about big bonus legs and here I am, baby. There he is. There he is. Look at that. Look, it's Yippee-Ki-Yay, Scotto. Oh, damn it, Scotto. Damn it. Yippee-Ki-Yay. Jedi went from fucking here to here instantly. was like, Scotto.

Speaker: Yay, Scotto. Literally, Scotto.

Speaker: And now all of a sudden Lazy has the hiccups. yeah Yeah. I'm going to bend over if you want to help cure him later. thank you bray It's not the hind lick maneuver, but it's close.

Speaker: It's close. It's the hind lick maneuver. Lazy has stage four hiccups. stage four there you guys keep talking about hiccup someone else fuck What up, Scotto, you have sexy bitch?

Speaker: Yes, you beautiful queen. Let me see the nails. Let me see the nails, girl. Give me the nails. yeah um i'm breaking them on I'm bringing them them up.

Speaker: I'm bringing them up. Bring them up. yeah know I like holographic silver. I love it. Look at you. I put your nails down. Let me see that. beautiful There it is.

Speaker: Look at you. You're beautiful. Stand up and drop them. Bend over to the front touch your toes. There's my shadow. yeah wi kindta Lick it up and down just like Glick knows. Yeah, let me let me see that pig be wiggly a little bit. know you mass feel like it' andty yes and i'm On the back of the shirt, it says I'm big for the pig.

Speaker: yeah he said he said the tail ain't the only thing that's squiggly britney say i know that He said he'll pork you later. My birthday is in two days.

Speaker: Very nice shade of purple, Brittany. I love those. Very nice shade of purple. you should get Why didn't you give yourself the full screen, Brittany? It's not worth it. Have you seen it, fam? Awww. Awww. Awww. Awww

Speaker: you're totally yeah you know man dude today Dude, bro, you're totally worth it. just Have you seen the family feed clip? What's that host name, Steve? ah what's the Harvey. Steve Harvey. yeah He asked the black panel guest, what's something what's another word that goes with pine?

Speaker: And the guy says, pork you. Yeah. Oh, my God. It's what goes with pork, and he says, you pine. Oh, yeah that's yeah, I got it backwards. You're right. You're the fourth dyslexic person on this panel.

Speaker: so Yeah, see how he's going, but it takes him a second, and he's like, yeah. He's bald. He said, you pine. He said, this dumbass said you pine. There's nothing wrong with bald people. Oh, my God.

Speaker: I like it when the old ladies give the dirty answers. um with With the cutest smile on their face. yeah like that with one yeah Grandma, what's your answer? I like it up the Steve.

Speaker: my favorite one is ah they asked this old lady who was like she looked like she was headed to church. and They said, what's something you like to sit on And she says, my husband's I said,

Speaker: I need to know Jersey. Are you drinking with me or what? yeah Jersey? What are you doing here, Jersey? Come on. Cheers to all you fuckers up here. Cheers everybody in chat. yeah I gotta make a new one in a minute.

Speaker: Cheers.

Speaker: Not the right kind of glass, but whatever. Jersey out there running naked in woods with the fucking Jersey devil and shit.

Speaker: Okay. Don't get me. Don't get me. Make sure you got the moon spraying. No moon burns over there. Well, I'm sober too, babe. I didn't ask if you were sober. I asked if you were drinking with me.

Speaker: There's a difference. Yes, ma'am. Anyways, have y'all ever... oh No. No. Well, twice. Twice. so I go out on nature trails, right?

Speaker: There's this specific spot. i I'm not going to say. And I like to go barefoot. if I like to time myself to see how far I can go, how fast I can go and climb the rocks because there big boulders back there. I have to rock climb. then yeah like How high up is it? like but You got an unfair advantage with your finger toes, man.

Speaker: Yeah, I do. You're not wrong. You're climbing with four hands and shit, man. yeah she did i mean and <unk> spider monkey I need a GoPro. When I think of Scott, I touch myself.

Speaker: You don't need a GoPro. You're a Brit, bro. It's funny to watch Glick go full gay whenever Scott comes on here, man. yeah so i a fuckcker Stand up. Glick, stand a fuck up. I know you got a pink tutu on. Stand the fuck up.

Speaker: and He's still got it tucked into his waistband. Does he have quick tutu on? He saves that for bucking out the closet.

Speaker: He's got his thong on backwards, too. yeah anyway Stand up. but balls squeezing out both sides and shit. My soldier is at full attention because Scotto's here. Shut up.

Speaker: Don't judge me because I love me some Scotto. Hey, we don't kink shame here, man.

Speaker: Scotto just sits back quietly like, yeah, I know. I have that effect. My precious. Scotto just sits over there with the who's your daddy face.

Speaker: ah Take it all in. my you see it Oh, yeah, you take it all in? Oh, hell yeah. Only when she has hiccups.

Speaker: so Mine's better. All the way to the base. All the way to the base. Nobody cares Jersey because you're not on the panel. Can I put my balls in too? good You know what? That would be Shaman too. He'd show his balls before he shows his face. that's hey Legitimate serious thing. The balls are shaved. The face is not.

Speaker: There's a such thing called a baldo. For real? Real? Does anybody know about this? way Not that we're going to fucking admit.

Speaker: No, no. I've never heard of this. got it Educate us. It's just literal. You put this device thing around your balls and a couple of rings and you can literally fuck somebody with your ball sack. Lord of the Rings.

Speaker: Why? Why would you do that? what I did not make this thing. For men born without a penis? like what What's the point? no goryl Those That's for the minigand. Hold on a damn second. so there's even if My balls are way bigger than my dick.

Speaker: So I can buy a device. All right. Why did we have to wait a second to hear that? My ball side hangs to my knees, so I can make a device where I can fuck somebody. cur dude but well Nobody cares, dude. He's not telling you that he has short thighs, though.

Speaker: He's got really short thighs and long shins. Hey, Glick, I'm not going to say hashtag 60, but hashtag 60, motherfucker.

Speaker: Did anybody else hear Big Daddy in their head with those loose skin and his old balls? I'll say what you're thinking, Moe Dogg. Just wait till you hit 60. You think they're bigger now. Wait till you hit 60, man. You hit 59 and half. You hit 59 and half. Yep.

Speaker: <unk> sixty i you hit fifty nine and a half oh you have to on it sit down now yu I was going to say, my balls already go swimming. If I hit 60, I'm going to eat a wheelbarrow.

Speaker: You just got to lift your ass up when you flush, man. You don't want them get sucked down the fucking hole. Oh, my God. That's all I'm into. striking my life What is my fucking life? and What is my life? I've been sinking a lake jersey.

Speaker: Brittany, if you're just now questioning that. Your balls hasn't hit maturity until you start telling the temperature and the time. I still remember the first time I sat on a nut while I was in the car. I was sitting down on the couch the other night, about two weeks i still remember the first time i sat on a note while i was in the car watch the dad sit down on a couch the other night about two weeks ago when i'd said down um i've Cried like a fucking virgin on prom night. They don't wake you the fuck up. yeah you know you You know what? You you want to know what really fucking sucks?

Speaker: I can't even sleep on my side anymore because if I sleep on my side too long, I crush my sack and then I wake up and it's like... yeah No, seriously. I'm not... know he can like something a bad hair so um I know exactly what he's talking about.

Speaker: You got to lay down on your side. You got to do the hand tuck and pull the shit up before you can lay down properly. yeah because i' squished I mean, I've heard. I read that on the internet somewhere. Perfect. He'll you in. Don't worry. me send you my address.

Speaker: gonna I dropped a link in the back chat. They literally have a YouTube page. They have educational videos. like It's crazy. but there's And if you come using a Baldo, they refer to it as a Balgasm. So and have your first Balgasm. Scotto, if this is your fucking Pornhub link again. It's a legit serious thing.

Speaker: I only know about this because when that lawyer in the crusade got busted um and the police were going to search his house, they had to write in the police report, he has like four or five baldos of various sizes. I'm like, what the fuck is that? I'm allegedly smart.

Speaker: I'm allegedly smart. Scotto, I'm not totally believing that you had to look this shit up to find out what it is. I'm just saying. wow I'm not totally convinced that's all of the fucking truth to the story.

Speaker: while there was Playmore. I could believe you wrote the fucking educational article. I mean... all all i All I know is my night has been made because my Scott, my sweet, sweet Scott.

Speaker: Glick's still got that sweet fucking 16-year-old girl fucking glow on his face and shit, man. ah point That is glow, right? Scotto, is that glow? I don't but don't know. yeah He's going around.

Speaker: That's my semen on his face. well i was You're in the Navy now, Glick. You're in the Navy. The Glick and Amy have happened. You can sell the seven seas in the Navy. I like calling it a semen cemetery because once semen hits the air, you know they're technically dead. so It's a semen cemetery. You call your face a semen cemetery? land Just merge the words together and call it a semen cemetery. Cemetery. Yeah, cemetery. Let's turn it into a real come back home, man.

Speaker: let's turn into a real comacle man don't know i a hi just like with i' hanging in are y'all but I wonder how many words we've created on this network in the last three months. oh We could probably come up with like a Glick dictionary, man.

Speaker: Glick dictionary. You should come up with a word to express how many words you've come up with. Fuck all y'all.

Speaker: The Glictionary already thing, Brittany. You're going to have to deal with it. We already have words in the Glictionary.

Speaker: If the Glictionary is pop-up book, I will buy a copy. ah that I will make a special copy just for you, Scotto. When you read it, something will pop up.

Speaker: It'll be a quick read, Scotto. Anything you want, girl. Just watch out for the sticky pages. Yeah. You got to read the small print. yeah Anything my Scotto wants, my Scotto gets. more i don't know I will see you lovely people later. have a fun

Speaker: have left take care of and So you'll appreciate it. I'm at this age where like I will read something that has small print. I'm like, what the fuck is this? And I have to actually get my phone and zoom in and take a picture. yeah and ask me yeah Trust me. It's small print.

Speaker: We'll call it small print. so You're going to have to zoom in. Scotto, you're not far away from them 60-year-old balls, dude. telling you. and I'm 32 in two days. You've got to put the chain on the door. Turn that on. A whole fucking 32, Brittany?

Speaker: Do you? so think somebody Oh, you're so old. Put the chain on the door. This fucking shirt's 28 years old. What the fuck, man? I got jeans in my closet that are older than Brittany.

Speaker: I actually have clothes older than her. No doubt. i Seriously, I do too, MoDog. Yeah, I do. Yeah, look right there. scott Right where he belongs.

Speaker: um Right below My sweet little bottom. Oh, look at that. A little power bottom. little power bottom that you are. Yeah, yeah. Well, shaman, enjoy, buddy. Let let us know.

Speaker: Jedi got all jealous and left and went in bed. Yeah, what the fuck did I? He's all texting me at work. Come on. Come on and on. Dude, Shaman, don't act like you're not my boy, Shaman. mean, yeah, but... See, Rock wasn't here. He had to be convinced to come up.

Speaker: don't act like you're not my boy shaman i mean yeah but yeah but but you' so sex hu and i you adulty see rock rock wasn't here he had to be convinced to come up and i think

Speaker: like said that that that fucking That fucking got sent to me. i got a screenshot of the of the panel last weekend and lost my fucking mind. And I was like, oh my god. but Send it to me.

Speaker: Door closes and then flaps. i think the best part is off of that panel like it finishes and i think jedi goes to watch it the next day and the picture of all of us is jedi was the thumbnail nice all right i'll be back i'll be white here you'll be white

Speaker: you'll be white share movie but

Speaker: It looks like one of those ninety s cream sickle. Yeah, why does... Look, I didn't want to say anything, but why does Sarge look like an orange cream sickle to me? He does. He's an orange sickle. An orange cream sickle that somebody took a bite out of.

Speaker: Yeah, that's exactly what he looks like. cause he's got that He's got all the gray hair. I'm so jealous. I wish my beard would go all gray. Yeah, I wish. What? Yeah, I see you, Skata.

Speaker: I'm like three-fourths of the way there. I just don't know. No, no, no, no, no. Actually, okay. it's like I just fucking hate you, but I love you, and I will say your beard did look pretty dope, even though you're done.

Speaker: You got to see it in person, and you're like, You make fun of me for dying my beard. and You're like, wow, he really doesn't dye his beard. because no i said oh you No, it gave me further proof that you do dye your beard.

Speaker: No, it gave me further proof that I have the most amazing beard on the planet. No, it was dope. It was a little dry. Just appreciate it. No, it wasn't. No, it wasn't.

Speaker: I oiled it up. I lotioned it up. I know i had beard but i did i have oil and beard balls. I know. i used youre smoke because You did yeah smell good. smell good. i love that. that's that's That's the quality. Look, men.

Speaker: look man You don't have to be impressing nobody.

Speaker: What the fuck? Who the fuck is that? um that's That's me. That's for you. no heard about your beard. When it comes to beard care, I will say as a female, yeah I appreciate that fucking shit. Guys, if you got a beard, if you got a beard take care of Take care of that fucking it up yeah that's what That's what's funny about ah you know you think a lot of people would think, oh, you get a beard, you know you're all ah only being just manly and i don't have to take care of myself. now you got to do extra stuff. It's extra work for sure. so i Not only do I have a beard,

Speaker: You gotta trim it right. You gotta trim it right. Yeah, you gotta condition that shit. yeah And I don't look like a creamsicle motherfucker. I look like Golden Hour. Get the shit right.

Speaker: Ooh, Jersey shit. I mean, at least the creamsicles taste you. They're not coming in hot. Have you guys actually got to meet in person yet? Have you guys got to hang out person yet? Yeah, they have a picture together. Yeah. Don't you start to shut up, Glick. God damn it.

Speaker: just hope that everybody knows that I nothing but love for Jersey and MoDog. It's happening. yeah I don't believe you, bro.

Speaker: i got nothing but love for jersey and modol yeah jersey my dog it's happening i don't i don't believe we bro it believe jersey but theres how much of yeah Jersey knows how much I love her.

Speaker: Yeah, it's happening soon. I think I'm going to up there and catch the all the pretty New Jersey colors of leaves in the trees and shit. i you're gonna be near me not before im ah um but hang out to look out Look out your window, Brittany, at the highway, and I'll be that car going like 140 mile an hour past your fucking house, dude.

Speaker: yeah outrage you feeling take me all not break you let's go but Wait I to go to... so wait a minute but i from kentucky would i come through pennsylvania to go ah to Jersey. now you can You can come wherever you want.

Speaker: That's where I do. right Where are you at? I'm in Annapolis currently. Oh, you are? Okay. yeah you know what You know what? I was going to say Jersey, I was going to hang out with MoDog before you, but the Browns and Bengals don't embarrass each other.

Speaker: Yeah. That be a cry man.

Speaker: that would be a cry that'd be a cry first man What the fuck is this? We can hang out together. and January fourth 2026 because that is the last game of the season apparently. Yeah, well. Do you have to make a request for that?

Speaker: The Bengals season's already fucking over, dude. I've already gave up on them. I have. I'm like, fuck them. we were We were in week one of preseason and I was already going, well, there's already negative. Even though the Browns are 3-0 in preseason, it's a rebuilding year, know?

Speaker: That's what Joe Burrow's niece said. Motherfuckers. Yeah, it's like he gets hurt and team says, oh shit, we forgot how to play as a team and win. you forgot how to play that Your offensive line has never figured out in in seven years how to block that kid.

Speaker: I know. I know. It's the brand just question Bring up what I dropped in the back. It's about your beard. No. You guys got a wonderful beard. I love to come on it. I love to come on it. It's calm catcher. Are those real sites?

Speaker: Scruff and Growler? Yeah, they're male hookup sites. There's a couple of videos where these female actors take all these messages that men sent and read them as women in their fucking letters. I mean, they're graphic, but they're funny.

Speaker: Hell yeah. that It's a cum catcher. I always, oh my God. it is can Can you say cum catcher and semen cemetery in the same fucking breath? I mean, if you take a deep breath before you start speaking, that sounds like this year's new Halloween, scary movie, man.

Speaker: Thank you, Brittany. I just, I just, I just want to, I just want to say, ladies, um, if, uh, you happen to have a built-in water park, these are great for that.

Speaker: Yeah, you got a sponge growing off your face. No. You're goddamn right I do. Crumb catcher. It's the crumb catcher saver. If you are a super soaker 3000, you're a super soaker 3000. Britt, you might need to wash that thing a little bit more often, man. If you're fucking spitting out crumbs and shit, man.

Speaker: that just saying ah Chris, your facial hair is crab catcher. Crab catcher. Crab catcher. Are you a longshoreman? No, I just take this girl named Brittany.

Speaker: yeah much but i was I was a masturbator at one point. I've never given it up. no okay start walking get his dog

Speaker: yeah start walking get his dog creek around or that approval function that's his dog i thought it was him so term the means self work i thought it That's how he sounds when he laughs.

Speaker: looking at my right problem no that's the biggest sound of chihua i've ever fucking heard man was bio she is that she is on stoids mo dog that remind one of my best friends Like we worked doing pressure washing and that our boss bought us a box to watch the flyers. I've pressure washed a few boxes.

Speaker: Yeah, me too. ah pressure washed a box last night. and he's got on Monday.

Speaker: i'm just I'm just distracted that you got hair, Brittany. I've never seen your hair down before. and i wear yeah. but I my hair and back and forth. Yeah, no. But your your boss got you a box.

Speaker: Yeah, he bought us all a box. Wait, box got... You said your boss got in your box? For Flyers and Billy? That's how you get ahead in life, Glick. You didn't know how meic works? Yeah.

Speaker: He bought us a fucking box for us to watch the caps versus the flyers. His girls and flyers fan. I'm a fire fan. and also got the cap fan and they fucking run. I forgot what i was going with that because you guys can't fucking shut up.

Speaker: so okay It's okay, Megan. just Oh. My friend, I fucking hate you. My friend Ricky was like, this is the worst fucking baseball game I've ever seen in my fucking life.

Speaker: And then I just turn and it's hockey.

Speaker: Yeah, fuck shaman hard Brittany

Speaker: basketball game i've ever seen in my life and i i just you go wow that was like i know i was against voice qua all of you fuck call that's gonna take yeah fuck shaing yeah fuck shaman hard britney yeah you never been fuck him or Fuck him until he has a face.

Speaker: Okay? You fuck him so good. Fuck him into existence. Fuck him real good. I hate you guys. i Fuck me till I love you.

Speaker: Fuck him, dude. Fuck him, dude. Yeah, dude. Oh, shit. Poor Brittany. You take so much shit, man.

Speaker: Props to you, girl. Who just deserves to be backstage for those comments? You take as much shit as Scotto's dick, man. boom and Sorry. Sorry, Scotto. That just popped in my head. I'm sorry, man.

Speaker: That was wrong. dicklu Rewind that. My bad. I apologize. that was that My dick pops in your head, MoDog. That was out of line, man. i was that a line That was out of line. just your dick. It's almost like... a thing your dick is crooked if it was not in line hey I love you. I love you, Scotto. I'm just joking. MoDog, we might share purple crayons together, but you leave my sweet Scotto out of this.

Speaker: um but My bad. My bad. You share purple cans of purple-headed yogurt slingers, okay? Yeah, just because we eat crayons and touch tips doesn't mean you you can be mean to my sweet, sweet Scotto.

Speaker: but I do apologize, Scotto. That was funny. Blake and MoDog reinvented the fucking... It was fucking funny, but I still apologize.

Speaker: but It was fucking funny. The key to make it funny, so good job. but at what what what would And What Moe Dogg and Glick does is is is our our secret.

Speaker: All right? Nothing happens between us. You don't always have to be included, man. It's okay. Nothing happens. Jedi said it. Jedi said it. Nothing nothing happens.

Speaker: Nothing happens. Look, Jersey's still here. Nothing happens. Moe Dogg and I are just friends. Just friends. Three tips. Three tips. yeah three tips three tips three three tip Three tips. Three three tips and a brown donut.

Speaker: That's a trident. That's fucking trident. Guess who's who? who That's a trident. I'll trident anything once. who's who? two three Three chips and a plain doublehead. You got to get blindfolded and you got to figure out which trident is who's. It's like the 2025 version of the relationship taste test. well get hilarious Guess who's who? Hey, Ty, you can get a lot weirder than this.

Speaker: It could get worse. She's giving it the claw. but It's the same thing that kid with the epilepsy does, man. it' because that happens perhaps like your Best boyfriend ever.

Speaker: It still seems like cerebral palsy to me, but whatever. well Jersey, I'm i'm glad i'm not a i'm not um I'm not a filthy secret, and you already know about Mo Dog and I.

Speaker: Yeah, you're a third wheel, bro. I am a third wheel. I wasn't always a third wheel, and then Jersey came along. Bitch. Bitch. Way to twist that one. Good job. Good save, man. I got the Uno reverse card for everything. Go play with me. It's Glicks World.

Speaker: You sons of bitches are living in it. Modag's going to have to sleep on the couch tonight, even though he doesn't even live with her. I saw her type in the chat about an hour and a half ago that I might be going back to the basement. He's going to sleep on the couch in his own apartment. Right? you went from the Which means downstairs with the spare tire. you typed in chat, babe.

Speaker: yeah i saw what you typed in chatba Sarge might be going back to the basement. I saw this shit. but didn change me Just because I didn't comment on it didn't mean I didn't fucking and see it. do You know what I'm saying? That's why you make the basement the man man's fucking...

Speaker: thrown down there. then when you go to the basement, hell yeah, see you later. When you was in the basement, when you sent me to the basement, that's right. Sometimes kind of nice be banished.

Speaker: It's like, okay, yeah, yeah I'm going to go suffer in the place I like the most. Yeah, I got strippers in my basement. You know what That is not a support Structure or stop pole That's not what that is Do you guys do video chat And then you fall asleep on video chat We have. i love fucking How fucking cute is that? Come on. Cute as fuck. The difference is, Modog and Jersey have been a thing for a while.

Speaker: Quick, you have a new one. yeah yeah like yeah You know, it's it's funny you say that. Bitch, you change girlfriends more than change my boxers, motherfucker. It's funny you say that, Jersey, because Scotto says the same thing to me every weekend.

Speaker: Punish me, daddy. Blake sends me off to the kitchen to make a sandwich and I come back and he's asleep already. Untrackable. Yeah, he's not wrong. that Where are you at, untrackable? Get man. crack?

Speaker: Sasquatch gets very sleepy when they get filled with lust like that. He's so excited and he just falls asleep. He's like a fainting goat. Look. You guys, there's a there's a lot going on behind the scenes in my world that you guys don't know about. behind this And i've been doing and i've been and i've been doing a lot of I've been doing a lot of fuckery and bullshit.

Speaker: But yes, I do have a new girlfriend and we've been talking for a little hot minute. When do we get to meet her? A little hot. I don't know. What's his name? Yeah, it's his name.

Speaker: Scato. Scato. Right here. It's right here. I knew it. I knew it the whole time. It's my girlfriend. It's big for the pig. And guess who the pig is right here.

Speaker: Big pig. it's a bear. He likes bears. I am a bear. Yeah. Yeah. don't know why he just pointed to Jedi. but his bears here be wrong yeah I don't think he was pointed to a Jedi. i think he was just small like, duh.

Speaker: am i or not Am I or am I not a bear in the and the community? oh du you'd You'd be Papa Bear in the community if I had to guess. If I had to make an intelligent guess. but know like you You are a big dude. With that hat, he kind of reminds me of Winnie the Pooh.

Speaker: He likes honey. Oh, honey. well you're not gay so no He's a poo bear do we Do we really know that? Do we go know that? Just bring Scotto up on panel and that motherfucker goes full gay, man All you guys know is that I have a new girlfriend You don't know anything about my new girlfriend you do have Did she get her nails done recently?

Speaker: but are they gray? scott didn't get his are they Let's bring them up again. I'm bringing up brand maybe is ask again let's go look at that there's still kind of holograph i love it should just a magnet thing so hallelicic Yes, exactly. yeahmoed Another new word. Add it to the Glictionary.

Speaker: so get up You're in charge of the Glictionary. go on Okay, well, who's in charge of teaching you to read so you can know what's in the Glictionary? That's not important.

Speaker: That's why you gotta draw every word. gotta make hieroglyphics and shit. He said the word dick. He's like, oh, yep, it's out. and yeah It's been in the waistband since Scotto came up here.

Speaker: but That's why it's gonna be a pop-up book. can You fluff your waistband a few times. Shaman, dude, that was good. What'd you say? Sorry, Shaman. What'd you say?

Speaker: Glick's got the stiffest waistband on the fucking panel.

Speaker: It's gonna be pop-up book. Look, I will never hide the fact of how much I love Scotto. I love me some Scotto. I hope one day that and that we are able to meet each other.

Speaker: this boat by my My girlfriend, I will say this, my girlfriend, her nephew is gay. And and and and she was like and she she was like, hey, I hope it's okay.

Speaker: You're going to meet my nephew. He's gay. And I'm like, okay. fucking care i literally have a broster he's like yeah i fucking love gay people i'm kind of gay my damn self man i'm kind of pretty gay myself no i said i i was like i have a broster not only that but and then she's a fan of what we do here she loves our she loves our network just yeah and uh and i was like one of my favorite people in the whole wide world is scotto and he's a gay guy he comes up here and i go full gay every time he comes up And she's like, oh, Lord.

Speaker: that's He actually is always full-gayed just to be prepared for Scott. Is she watching yet? Has she been watching and lurking? She has been watching. She's not currently watching because they are watching. They supporting a friend of theirs who fights in the mixed martial arts world.

Speaker: And he has a fight tonight, but we are chatting as we do the show. But. She will eventually get to see you. I like big balls. Isn't that kind of like Stolen Valor?

Speaker: big balls and I cannot lie. What's Stolen Valor? You know, act acting gay only when he's here. that like Stolen Valley? I mean, oh that's more like he's been doing it the whole time. Lazy laisy and i created a whole ass paid website just out of me acting gay.

Speaker: You think I'm attracted to him? It's called Glaze.com, man. Ew, I hate you. fucking you. It's called Glazy Donuts.

Speaker: No! Breakfast of Champions. christian Fuck you, Wheaties. Breakfast of Champions and Semen Cemetery. Yes, yes there there is cream filling.

Speaker: and Look, I am 100% a straight-ass man, but I'm secure enough in my sexuality that I can flirt with Scott. You can fuck dudes. I can have sex with Scott if I wanted to. I'm so secure. I'm so secure. I can fuck guys and still be straight. I'm so That's exactly what it is.

Speaker: I think he's got that yellow fucking hat. That's how I like you back. Come on. I know. That's what you're saying. A straight guy. Scott O's straight, too. Yeah. yeah yeah click like i'm I'm straight, but my friend that I fucking ass, I think he might be gay.

Speaker: He might be gay. He likes me too much. My boyfriend? I don't know about him. I'm straight, but Scotto's gay. Ty's got a point. It's not gay if it's with Scotto, and I'm pretty sure he has a fucking hoodie that even says that.

Speaker: Yes, I do. you but that art yeah favor of that how do i get How do I get that hoodie? I need a of that hoodie. so excellent I'll find you before. What? Hey, it's cupping season.

Speaker: It's big boy season. That's all season. It falls right around the corner. it's It's starting to get cold. It's big boy season. I'm just saying. need that. but Watch out for Susan.

Speaker: Glick's like, I'm a saskatch. You want climb my tree? yeah Yeah, you want to climb my cock? I mean tree. I always confuse those two words. Cock and tree. They're they're similar. I don't like it.

Speaker: That must be really weird when you go to state parks. Brittany, I got a question. what What was it like meeting him for the first time at the wedding? What was it like meeting him person? how I will tell you this. i would tell you this i was ah She's going to say some mean shit, I'm to tell you the truth.

Speaker: She gave me the biggest goddamn hug as soon as I got out of my car. She gave me the biggest hug and And I gave her, i wrapped her up. I could have put my arms around her like 17 times. You were gentle. She didn't crush her into oblivion. I was very gentle, so I didn't crush her. But it was was very nice. Before she says something mean, it was very nice to meet Brittany.

Speaker: And it was very nice to talk to her. and And like I said, she gave me the biggest hug in the world. Yeah, okay, whatever. Brittany, how did it go when you first met him, man? Um... um I gave the biggest hug in the world. he brought it yeah He brought a roll of dimes to the wedding in his pocket.

Speaker: he was but they were hard. also so i did give him a hug. i wanted to oh Well, after the hug, I fucking punched him in the arm. did. Did you take the roll of dimes and hold them when you punched them? like the gar or Sometimes, yeah.

Speaker: Did you climb up him?

Speaker: She had to. She's like, ew. Is that cavernous? had to do this weird crouching thing where one knee was here and one knee was higher so she could and to like do this weird like crouching thing where like one knee was here and one knee was higher or she could I got a step stool so she could punch me in the arm.

Speaker: Crouching tiger hidden. Crouching tiger hidden. Crouching tiger hidden. I would look over at him sometimes when we were at the reception. was sitting next to me.

Speaker: We switched our seats so we would be sitting next to each other. and He would be looking at the fucking football game playing. and you turned over he would be looking at the fucking football game playing And I fucking punch him in the fucking leg.

Speaker: And I wouldn't even react because I didn't realize he's like swatting flies off and shit. What was that fly that just hit me? Jesus. Why are there so many flies in this reception? Some fucking gnats in this fucking hall, man. Yeah, no, it was a good time. We had a good time. It was nice meeting him. It was very nice meeting him. What was it like meeting Blaze?

Speaker: I've already met Blaze before yeah the wedding. I've hung out Blaze. Her experience with Blaze and my experience with Blaze are two different experiences. where is it not Elaborate.

Speaker: no no i've i have've I've hung out with Blaze several times. Blaze and I have actually he's actually done two live gigs at an axe throwing place here in town together. We did last Halloween and then before that we did their one year anniversary.

Speaker: um And then Blaze has been here several times. and Michael's been here a few times. Oh, yeah. But and that was the miss different situation, but different, different, go suck a big kind different, different. That's something me and Jersey do. She'll put her little like she'll put her phone on her mount and drive me like around her city and shit and show her.

Speaker: I do the same thing here. had to drive up fucking I had to drive up to Columbus with her on FaceTime and come up, meet you and hang out. Yeah, like he's been to my house twice. Dude, you hung out and we and we chilled.

Speaker: well I know we've exchanged this information, but don't do it on here. Motherfucker, don't ask me again where I live. Because you do every fucking panel. You live and you live in Saskatchewan, I know that.

Speaker: Yeah, yeah, yeah. no i know you're in kentucky you live in

Speaker: yeah i'm like little under two and a half hours away from you so that's nothing oh yeah oh yeah dude we gotta hang out and then we got a facetime jersey at this time i'm going i'm going at the gable well you're in annapolis maryland right now yeah okay why't you well you would be so much closer It would be so much closer if you went to see Jersey than to come here.

Speaker: Well, that's true. It would not be closer. It would be five times farther, but I still like that idea better. yeah Kentucky to Jersey is a lot farther than Kentucky to Columbus, dude. I'm talking about Rick.

Speaker: right oh oh go see jersey you we you and i meet up oh okay gotcha i got you got you each time each other but i want you and jersey to get together i love you i love you too you guys are you guys are kind of gross i will say yeah we are but in a good way they're not gross they're adorable like like a good like you guys they're fucking gross it's like a good version of herpes right dude i I'm saying it in a good way. i like them together. I'm just saying. It's a good version of herpes. It is.

Speaker: yeah I guess. it thats something So without giving out too much too much information, how because I don't have a map pulled up, how close is where you're at currently to New Jersey?

Speaker: ah Depends. Five hours and 34 minutes.

Speaker: ah appreciate it man you all did I just can't picture in my mind where it know where you're at currently. I'm trying to say that without saying where you're at. Like literally 10 minutes. are. Yeah, never mind. I'm stupid.

Speaker: like literally that again ten minutes i mean we had been five hours and thirty four minutes shit we my yeah we are yeah never my i'm stupid Yeah, i'm I'm literally right across.

Speaker: like i i ah third I'm the third exit into fucking Kentucky, man. Oh, I know. you Okay, yeah, We are literally like two hours away from each other. Oh, shit. yeah Yeah.

Speaker: Hey, Shawty. Shawty. Yeah, Shawty. Scotto know what we're going to do when we do meet up? Did you ever hear that story, Scotty?

Speaker: Besides that, I mean. No, Jersey's still here. Jersey's still here. No. of jersey has Jersey has anything to say about it, she'll be sending in the the this. She'll be sending that constantly. That's what I was saying.

Speaker: i know here's you guys He said he's got a cool gay bar up there. We're going meet up for the first time go hang out at a gay bar and get drunk. gay what where you yeah We got to go to Columbus to the gay bar. I've never been one.

Speaker: Glick's got a fucking chair up there with his fucking name stenciled on the back seat of it. Scotto, you know I love you. dude I love going to gay bars. And and as a gay guy.

Speaker: As a gay guy. i got again No, no, no. Listen, listen, listen. Yeah. This is the thing. This is when a straight guy goes into a gay bar, it's a different world, you know, because some, not all, but some are like, that's a straight guy because the gaydar goes off.

Speaker: I have gaydar for a straight guy. I can point out a gay from a mile away. I'm also very, very much straight. But i'm onnna test gay bars are really cool because I never had i ain't never had nobody buy drinks for me in a bar in my entire life.

Speaker: I go into a gay bar. You know who drinks for free all night long? This guy. Also, the bartender will lean across the bar and go, you know they're just trying to get you drunk enough to have sex with you because you're straight i'm like i hope they got big pockets because you like a drink no you can't i don't own any leather though you're gonna you're gonna get drugged one of these days bro but gli up bull it you can't drink because you you're gonna get cosby and uh yeah and fast

Speaker: for a bit I can't drink because what? You fucking drunk so fucking fast. like and Yeah. they did he Is he really a lightweight Brit? he All these cans of Miller Lite we see him drinking are they full water? Yeah, they're full of water.

Speaker: They're already drinking. and i do get drunk fast I do get drunk fast because i ain't no bitch. I'm not over here fucking sipping on beer. Wait, wait. I didn't have that backwards, but go on. I do get drunk fast. I ain't no bitch. Bitches can drink a lot. But I can drink a lot and I can also keep I'm not...

Speaker: but i can ah but can drink a lot and i can also keep my took but your like i'm not I'm just saying, if we go there we end up, both of us getting drunk, we have to be really careful on who we let fucking Uber us home. Yeah, you going to have to have sex each other so nobody else has sex with each other.

Speaker: It's not good if we sex with each other. We're going to have to act like a couple and shit, man. You guys have to dock in front of everybody so nobody tries to tread. Get away from my man, motherfucker. That's how you establish dominance. We're going to walk in straight as hell, but about six, seven, eight beers in, going to have to act like a couple that way. He's skipping out holding hands and shit. I mean, I don't know.

Speaker: i'm just see I don't know the protocol, but whatever. So you just got engaged and you're about to get married and just this and like, yeah. You're going to have to start holding hands and make drink. Yeah, dude, I got a ring I can put on my finger and everything. I'll be like, he proposed just tonight.

Speaker: got a ring, too. I don't know that they'll be able to see it when I'm wearing it. but like god You know you're going to show your cock ring off. We know this. ah Do I wear the studded one or the bedazzled one? Which one? I love going to gay bars. Gay bars are of fun, man.

Speaker: They're just like every other bar, except the ratio is like yeah i i love going to gay bars gay bars are a lot of fun men and and just like just like every other bar except the ratio is like

Speaker: 100% different. eyes one random One random girl that stumbled in and she doesn't know where she's at. And she's like, why are none of these guys hitting on me? Oh my God, I'm so sexy.

Speaker: mr Probably went there because she didn't get hit on and then she finally did it. And then there's the news you know like, which one of you queens are buying my beer tonight? Scotto put the link for his hoodie back in private chat. I don't know if you saw that. oh Did he really?

Speaker: Yeah. You know, I feel like every time it goes to a guy, he still buys a plan B and eats it the next day.

Speaker: That'd be a plan though, wouldn't it? This is Harley Dad merch. Dude, my dog, yeah. Skinny, skinny, skinny. It'd be a plan C. It'd be a plan G. G for coat hanger?

Speaker: It's going to be a full-on deal. Sorry, Mommy Dearest. I have no toe hangers in my closet for that reason. Trust me. Go get the wire toe hangers!

Speaker: It's either for abortion or to unlock my keys out of my car. yeah Glick has never hung up one of his shirts in his entire life, but he still has a closet for hangers. I have a hanger in trunk.

Speaker: and case that I told my 20-year-old daughter. I told my 20-year-old daughter it's not too late to abort you. Keep fucking around. Yeah. sign You gotta you gotta to let him know who's boss.

Speaker: You put your hanger in your trunk so you can unlock your car. I did the same fucking thing and I'm like, fuck, I can't get my fucking hanger to unlock my fucking Yeah, yeah.

Speaker: Guess what? That's where my umbrella is too and then it always happens when I'm inside it starts raining and I'm like, fuck. how old it is are your ah How old are your guys' cars? 2017. If I accidentally lock my keys in the car, my car is like, we're not locked, asshole.

Speaker: And if it does lock, all I got to do is walk up to it and pull the handle, and it's just like, hey, you get drunk piece of shit, you left your keys here. Look, don't act like I got some old car. It's a 92, okay?

Speaker: My bad, Sean. I didn't know you had a brand new car. My bad. Not saying it's a wood panel station wagon or anything. That's probably the sexiest people ever created. Candy on the side of it, but. just a Big white van that says free candy inside.

Speaker: That's what I said. That's what the fuck I said. I mean, it is free. I see you. I see you. Brandon Biggs, All of us better. Dude, I can't.

Speaker: Sorry. Thanks. for that There's her go-to. I'm feeling stressed. We all feel better now. I feel better. Okay, Glick, you're making me fucking angry.

Speaker: Brittany's got her own built-in. What are those fucking spinner things, man? fidget Fidget spinners? Yeah. yeah On my lip ring, I just spin it with my tongue. Brittany's a fidget toy. Yeah. Scotto, can you flip that, please?

Speaker: So I made a 3D printed a fidget toy. oh boy. Oh, boy. yeah teach yeah When you say toy like that, it doesn't sound like it's for kids. Hang on. Full screening.

Speaker: Scotto puts it in his butt, and every time he farts, it creates energy. It's green energy. So these are the brown energy that you can just sit here and fiddle with. I fucking love it. I got a fidget toy you can fiddle with.

Speaker: How does that fit on your cock, though? I created a little box. His cock is shaped like a... That's awesome. How is that gay if it's the it's in a box? It's not gay. It's awesome.

Speaker: That's pretty cool. What Scotto has is not gay. What I said was gay. I told Scotto that I had a toy that he could. I would accidentally forget that's fake and try to eat it. This is the only kind of box I'll see me ever around. I love it.

Speaker: I'll get in your box, Scotto. Scotto's like, I got this $6,000 fucking printer. I got to make something that makes it look like i print other shit with it. it's yeah i need give um money Oh prince dicks yeah how many dellos have you writtened so far chicago only like all um yeah' a far yeah umm um about half brand You to print off an exact glipper.

Speaker: you need you need you need measurements to print off a exactly and exact flipr g No, he doesn't need measurements. the smaller up and that yeah good go by memory and the smallest setting it does it by memory so fuck

Speaker: um either Robert Platinum said gay is when you put Vaseline on the pizza. You ah gotta pay extra for that topic.

Speaker: Yeah, I'm sorry about that shit. That beer went down way too quick. Creamsicle out. I'll be right back. Okay. Creamsicle out.

Speaker: ah You know what? I think he's the FBI agent they they scheduled to watch this. minute ten or is this aor mode Agent Creamsicle. Check in, Agent Creamsicle. Double Agent Creamsicle checking in.

Speaker: oh yeah Same shit. Different night. Fucking Glick is out of control. My FBI agents that are in charge of me are just like His name is the Agent Orange.

Speaker: Agent Orange. There you go, Scott. That's perfect. Oh, yeah. Agent Orange. Isn't that a cleaner? Is that a cleaner? He's not going to get a new drink. He's going to check in with headquarters, and then he's going to come right back. Oh, you mean Jason?

Speaker: Agent Orange is a following hint that they sprayed in the jungle. They're all... Ah, that's what it was. Okay. okay know it was still so bad They're just trying to make sure we're not going to all radicalize.

Speaker: I'm a little cream, sickle, short, and stout.

Speaker: Oh, cheers. Here is my bed. Cheers. Cheers. I'm hung like a bullfrog, man. and I'm hung like a field mouse.

Speaker: You know, Jeremiah was a bullfrog. Jeremiah was He was a good friend of mine.

Speaker: Oh, my God. I see what you're doing. I see what you're doing. Clever. Cheers. clear Cheers. You can't cheers and not drink.

Speaker: Right? What the fuck? What are you cheersing? Cheers. Cheers. Cheers. chair Cheers. Where everybody knows your name. Yeah, it's a good song, actually. Scotto, what the fuck you been up to, man? I ain't seen you in hot minute, man. Doing all right? Doing good? Good. Okay, so your nails, so you did the little magnet thing where they, like, move the metal in the nails, right? Yeah.

Speaker: I'll hire are you when you go get your nails done, Brittany. but I haven't gotten my nails done. metal on my fingertips because I like it. Well, no, they have like little metallic things in there. And then you take a magnet and it moves it around to make like a little design. Graphene, man. They got graphene.

Speaker: Yeah, the glitter is magnetically charged, so they hold a little matter on the top to bring it up to the top, and there's all these little crazy tricks you can do with the magnets to make little designs and fit with the glitter. and How do they make glitter?

Speaker: My girl Mona, that's her white name. Her real name is like... That's her white that's her government name. That's her white name. Mona is her white name?

Speaker: That's her white name, Mona? She's from Vietnam. It's her last name, Lot, Mona Lot. he's from vietnam how that's kind i got it yeah and She's from Vietnam.

Speaker: She does my nails, but since I do construction and shit like that, it's hard to have my nails did. this umcato but You do construction?

Speaker: Yeah, my whole fucking life. Construction. Let's go. My whole fucking life. Yeah, my dad's from the womb, dude.

Speaker: She was building shit in there. she was paving. She paved her way out the vagina. From the womb, she can build you a tomb because she does construction. yeah and then my mom left me 10 months later. so yeah, I was with my dad doing construction. i hope Yeah, your mom left you for a Mexican who burned fucking family's house down and got out of jail before your dad did.

Speaker: He's not Mexican. He's not Mexican. Mexican adjacent. It's different. He sounds like he's Asian. but He's new Mexican? You know what is? No. He's he new Mexican. Mexa Asian?

Speaker: Mexa Asian? He's He's Asian. I hate all of you guys. I hate you guys. She's like, I fucking hate you all.

Speaker: we're all Die slow, motherfuckers well Fucking slores Is that Summer Shandy? It is It is Hey Would that be that Summer Shandy?

Speaker: That be that Shandy? That be that Shandy? It tastes like water What the fuck are you talking about? The fuck are you talking about?

Speaker: and mean you want what tastes like water but yeah fuck you talking so fuck you talking about whatever the fuck I want on my network, bitch. See, it's the Brittany Network.

Speaker: Oh. Y'all bitches about to go through a whole ass reorientation. That don't do nothing to me. That don't do nothing for me or to me.

Speaker: Y'all silly bitches forget who don't created all of this. Or to him. Or him or to him. or yeah Yes, yes, yes. Yes, MoDog. Yes, Scotto. Yes.

Speaker: Scotto is definitely a president. Dude, we should vote who the fucking president is. I vote for Scotto. Let's go. president not want Scott has been voted fucking president like 47,000 times in the last six months, man.

Speaker: That's true story. I don't know what you want what do yeah what do you want what do you want to vote on. At the end of the day, yeah you can vote whatever you want you can make anybody feel however they want to feel. At the end of the day, I have all the power and all the control. I wield everything.

Speaker: I am Thanos. I am Thanos. I will make all you bitches disappear. Oh my god.

Speaker: do with that except for scott Except for Scotto and Modo and Shaman. And Jedi and Shaman. That's right.

Speaker: That's what I thought. Okay. I'm just kidding. I'm not going make you disappear, but you know you're my girl. He don't want you climbing all back up on him again. damn. You know you're my favorite. You're my little sister.

Speaker: You know I got you. You're his little slore. little slore. little slore. you you physical like all my fucking body you Yes, you are.

Speaker: but oh my fucking god ah oh and knew that that wasn't creepy at all man Who's my little slur? Come tell daddy about your day. not your slur, dude. your slur, dude. Dude, dude, dude.

Speaker: Man, dude. I'm not your slur, dude. Dude, man. Dude, man. I'm not your slur. Dude, if you call me a slur, dude, I'm going to be mad, dude. If you call me a slur, amen. Listen, man. listen man I was doing a good Good.

Speaker: God. whats your money thanks thank you so thank back to i'm a day of i am so chap

Speaker: so trying convince such i imitate my newport you i was doing a good good goddam job yeah and ah just good I just couldn't say the internet word. I'm allowed to... You're allowed to say the internet word? Is that what you just said? I got my ghetto pass. I got my black card. I've been told multiple times I can say it. yeah but i mean I don't think that's universal. It works in certain neighborhoods, maybe. i feel like

Speaker: Don't worry, guys. Don't worry, guys. I got my black card right in the middle of the hood. I get invited to a can say it. I'm not racist. I got a black friend.

Speaker: not racist. My tires are black. Raisins in your potato salad. The fuck is that? i'm not i'm not racist my ti my tires are black rais in your potato salad ah fuck is that It's a white thing. I don't know. no have I've been white all my life, but I've never heard of that.

Speaker: I've eaten so much potato salad in my life, never with raisins. Are you sure yeah the rabbit didn't just shit in your dinner? Yeah, I was going say. She's got mouth turds in her fucking potato salad. White people do not put raisins in their potato salad. Also, another stereotype that's not true.

Speaker: Also, another stereotype that's not true. White people season their fucking food. Alright? And... yeah okay And wash their chicken? With salt and pepper, bitches.

Speaker: Yeah, with salt and pepper. I didn't even know that was a stereotype. And Old Bay because we're from Maryland, bitches. Oh my god, dude. Old Bay is fucking amazing. You can put Old Bay on fucking everything.

Speaker: You can put Old Bay on top of tahini and that shit would be good. Let's go. Maryland. You can put it on the fucking Dreamsticle and good.

Speaker: oh ba If you've never had Old Bay, you're missing out. That shit is good. now amazing Fucking Old Bay is overrated. I don't know, man. It's pretty fucking good. I don't use it very often, but when I do, I always it. I had that shit on my dick one time and that whore kept fucking sneezing like crazy.

Speaker: Oh, sorry. Forgot where I was at. My bad. Oh, Old Bay is on my food.

Speaker: Different bae. bad. New bae. Same night I had a gummy. ah Jersey calls Moe Dog old boo. no but Old bae boo. Old boo bae.

Speaker: She just calls him like Just old. Speaking of having a gummy. There goes my boner. yeah

Speaker: there goes my boner

Speaker: Did it? Or did it get bigger? I just said there it goes. I didn't say it went away. old bay is perfectgra first and he just didn't say enough. Like, oh,

Speaker: there it goes there go my owner there goes' to my waistpan again fight there it goes again your tone Hello, darkness, my missile of love. About to get glickened again.

Speaker: you clicked all over The is sickening. yeah Yeah, you know what? buck Get ready because it's thickening. look mean back to me I like what Shaman says. Yeah, that's why Shaman says.

Speaker: that Shaman says, fuck you, Jed. thought we were friends. I know who my real friend is. It's Shaman. And I'm friend at the end. Calm down, Chuckie. Yeah. over here.

Speaker: oh ah calm down sure that yeah ah good town over here oh Hey, let's not say that in this discussion because then we might get looped into a whole other group of people.

Speaker: Yeah, you even say though the movie title child's play anymore, otherwise people look east side. And we here too already. We're talking about pizza.

Speaker: Hashtag pizza. Yeah, but that was the click version of pizza gate. That's different. My fucking life. Wait, what's your life? Pizza. One Chris, one Chris, one Chris, one Chris, one Chris, one Chris, one. I've worked at four different pizza places.

Speaker: I know how to make it from scratch. Everything. I'm a dumb hoe. My ex-wife used to try to cook from scratch, but she could never find it in the store, so she never did. Brittany, when you were about to say that, year you looked at your hand like, do i have enough fingers left for four?

Speaker: Really? I have four. You double-checked yourself. about to say.

Speaker: but for right who ordered that pepperoni crabs Hold on, let me get my crab catcher. Need some old bait from aisle two, please.

Speaker: Breathe, Brittany, breathe. but Use your ears. Come on. Did we I used to show up to my old job on the like white

Speaker: Wait, what was your job on the boat? I'm on a boat. You needed to find out a little better. Boats and hoes. Boats and slores. Let's go. I'm on a motherfucking boat. Slores on shores.

Speaker: so Slores getting to shores. Yes. Dude. So many new words and sayings tonight. yes I love you dude. That's fucking awesome. You're in charge of notating all these. I lived on the water.

Speaker: Oh I should learn to read and write. You lived on the water. Well you said you worked on a boat. like well you said you worked on a boat I did also work on a boat. was masturbator. I put work in a boat. You don't need to be in a boat. Brittany, I can attest to this person. She rode her boat.

Speaker: Brittany's got a whole new version of what a crab boat is.

Speaker: yeah Wait, what'd you do what'd you do on a boat? What'd you do? Seriously. oh like I lived on a boat. We had a boat and so I would show up to work on the back well yeah like One day, one day I bought a boat.

Speaker: I named it Jenny. I named it Jenny. She was a whore.

Speaker: She was a slower. went to Vietnam and Jenny fucked all my friends. She was a slower. She was a slower. I had sex with Jenny and I caught crabs.

Speaker: Instead I on the dock he's like And then you turn back around and the boat turns around that scene where instead i started running i was it chi um when he's on the dock he's like for your grab oh and then you turn around and the boat turns around and and it goes the other way he said it happens what crabs crabs happen you can get crabs from just about anything ah through click we get together and get drunk at at a fucking game while we're getting arrested dude I'm just saying i got cry apple we're bail shit together

Speaker: We're going to make sure abby par Jersey and my and and my significant other have bail money. Right. And it's not like we're going to do anything horrible. We're just going to be Just going to be us and that'll be enough.

Speaker: Why get an Uber or a Lyft? Or a Gaber. Whatever. our gay we love it we've got We might get a hotel with two beds. We might get a hotel with one bed. don't know. It's cheaper.

Speaker: We might not get a of hotel. We just might walk to the nearest hotel and walk into our room and crash there. two Two big ass bear motherfuckers like, we only need one ten bit twenty one twin bed, sir.

Speaker: Really? Do you want to bring that up? What happens when the bear picks itself? That's not where I was going. I'm sorry.

Speaker: That's not what I was doing. Just drop it. Brittany got all serious. We'll move on from that shit. Move on. I didn't mean to do that. That's not what I was doing. I'm sorry.

Speaker: I'm sorry. I really am. Yeah, yeah, yeah. yeah can

Speaker: and ah dog i fucking hate you bull dog and g good i hate you too, Back to Big Adventure.

Speaker: i you coming as youll ever meet the coming winner of twenty twenty six yes it's brittanney van hello e don't make that sound I got some good memories of getting drunk on a beach in South Carolina. Oh, it's going again next time it plays. I love South Carolina, man.

Speaker: Oh, dude, I cannot wait to get down That's where I wanted to stay when I got out of the fucking core. My no my wife wanted to fucking move back here. I want i wanted my kids. My kids were five and three when I got out. I wanted them to grow up like Carolina babies and shit. You know?

Speaker: Yeah, I want to stay down in Carolinas and shit, man.

Speaker: My kids' as mom were like, I was like, I'm going back to Ohio. My son was born in Charleston, and he was like, Dad, I want to go back to Charleston. I'm like, well, take it up with your fucking... Charleston White?

Speaker: What? Charleston Black. My son was my son was born in Beaufort, South Carolina, and my daughter was born in Havelock, North Carolina. Yeah. so No. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Robert, 100% inexpensive.

Speaker: Taxes are free. Yeah, that's why we're doing it. Oh, dude. Jersey Modal Glick and his significant other, his lady friend. That's good. Down in South Carolina. Get it, get it. Get one of the party houses on the beach and shit?

Speaker: And then Chuck Town. Yeah, Chuck Town lay you down. shit. We're going to hell and hell. We can all go in for a house on on the beach. Hell yeah. house Jersey already knows this, but if I could, my favorite city like down in the south would be the fuck, I'd love to live in Savannah.

Speaker: I fucking love Savannah. causeannah Savannah is beautiful. Yeah. It's fucking awesome. Everybody loves Savannah. Shut the fuck up. There's a few hours there.

Speaker: sister city of Charleston because Savannah and Charleston are but basically identical. They model Savannah after Charleston. I mean, go yeah it's the sister city. It's close. so you know you know the really haunted cemetery down there?

Speaker: and Yeah, I forget the name of it. yeah the woman like on The one that little Gracie's buried in and shit. I can't fuck. I can't remember that. me Yeah. What the fuck is it called? so What the fuck is called? Sorry. I'm getting excited because I know what you're talking about. I like it. Okay. know okay So, like, me and me me and two other Marines went up there for the fucking weekend. We were hanging out in Savannah.

Speaker: And we got drunk as fuck and, and like, snuck into the into the fucking cemetery, basically. And... We're all, and and I believe in the paranormal, right? I'm not one of those like tries to make others believe in shit, but I grew up in a haunted house and saw ghosts and shit, right? But anyway, we're in there fucking around because we're drunk as hell, man.

Speaker: and And we start seeing shit, you know, like we start seeing shit that ain't there. Not because we were fucking drunk, but because we were seeing fucking like some apparitions and shit, like ducking behind tombstones and shit.

Speaker: Yeah, yeah. And because we were drunk, we were like, oh, we're going to pull some fucking marine maneuvers on this shit. We're going to flank them on this side and that side. We spent until the fucking sun came up and and we had a fucking blast. Yeah, yeah, yeah. It was fucking fun as shit, man.

Speaker: Yeah, we were like chasing them around the fucking graveyard and shit, man. That's so dope. I actually fucking love that. It was fun as shit. It was fun as shit. Dude. Dude.

Speaker: Yeah, man. It was a good time. yeah a coat offer Good fucking time, man. that sounds like But I love it. yeah love all the old architecture and the cobblestone streets and the Spanish moss and the trees and the fountains and the squares. my cousin you hit the money side. go to like yeah we used to go to like We would hold our breath when we'd drive past the cemeteries or whatever. You should hold your breath right now.

Speaker: Shut the fuck up, man. My mom used to say that shit. Gotta hold your breath when drive past the cemetery. and We went to a lot of abandoned houses. And this one abandoned house that my cousins and I went to, oh like I went in the bathroom and and There was like yeah thats too like skin like from somebody's scalp. And I was like, yo, we got to get fucked. Were there any engines around?

Speaker: any of Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa. Don't do that. Don't do that. yeah i'm out of trouble I got in trouble earlier for making fun of the engines. I offered all el one a blanket.

Speaker: I offered one a blanket. And then his mommy and daddy got all butt hurt. so You got Angel backstage. like and yeah Okay. I'm not doing the backstage. Thank you. girl. Hi. Hi, guys. Hi. Welcome back, handsome.

Speaker: was trying to be a beautiful queen. up, Brittany. My shadow's back. handsome i was sorry if i be thank you beautiful queen you i was like bringing me my shadows back Finish it up, Britt. Finish it up, man. I'm all enthralled. I need to know. I'm just teasing, Britt. Finish your story.

Speaker: and It was haunted. We saw some shit. It was in the middle of like a month. Best ghost story ever. It was haunted. We saw some shit. we saw so I mean, I laughed.

Speaker: I cried. was scared. It was a ride. It was ride. It was a piece of hair. it was a ah piece of hair wait like i real and like Like literally somebody just got murdered in that house and you were there. Yes, that's why I said let's get the fuck out of here.

Speaker: Like not one of those unbelievable things? Yeah. Unbelievable. You know, that's how I feel every Friday. I have this cute faceless disembodied voice next to me.

Speaker: towards you I think it's a

Speaker: I've got legit fucking ghost stories that I could tell people that are actual like real shit I love the paranormal I believe in ghosts, stuff like that my great grandma told me and I know it to be true, um I'm sensitive to that the other side So am I. Yeah.

Speaker: We can talk about this on another night. but No, we don't. This is how to talk about it tonight. Yeah, closer to Halloween, we should have like a ghost story night or something, man. Dude, you want to You want to? Yeah. Yeah, yeah, yeah. want to do a Saturday night where we... Fuck yeah.

Speaker: I got stories. Ghost stories. Glick's ghost stories. I love it. Let's follow it. Glick's ghost galleria. like Like Halloween's on a Friday this year, so either do it the night after Halloween or the weekend before.

Speaker: I'll be be

Speaker: um'll be here to talk i got ask him we guys stream on ah is it new hollow way ah always string yeah we're go do a holiday of course it's on friday we're all yeah no hope yeah yeah the halloween is actually on friday yeah So we'll do it the weekend. can would It's funny. It's almost like I just said that a minute ago. I just need to, I just,

Speaker: i just don't know what's going on and everybody's my kids are home for halloween

Speaker: are you goingnna be okay brittanney No, I don't think so. This is what happens when you have more two people on panel, girl. Brittany, you got to do the arm thing. It calms everybody down. Okay. Everybody. Everything's better.

Speaker: We just found our team. think it Brittany down. I think it calms Brittany down. It calms me down. It calms me down. It's like your built-in. Everybody's going to come on here and tell their biologicals.

Speaker: I'm down. I'll be here for it. Please play the trailer for Blackula. Brittany's possessed now.

Speaker: I got stories. I just have a hard time. Yeah, so do I. Some scary, some not scary, but real. yeah Real deal Holyfield.

Speaker: I'll be here too. Where are you going to be at, Jersey? it's gonna be on shadows but You're too good to come up on panel, Jersey? Is that what it is? Yeah, Jersey. chatter's box yeah jersey day What day did you talk? what what That's why he's going to come see me before he comes see you.

Speaker: wake up tomorrow with a knock on the door and it's going to be Jersey going, what now, motherfucker? bits we're just like and fucking Time's up, I didn't mean i don't mean it. He's two hours away. Why didn't you not kill me and go down there and see him? Because I got to help her hide the fucking body. What the fuck?

Speaker: I'll drive you. Allegedly. Allegedly, yeah. Might be in a house. Some of your hair might be on the wall. just saying. Allegedly.

Speaker: You're terrible at this. It's my first day being on a panel, man. Cut me some slack. You're doing great. Thanks, Dad.

Speaker: Thanks, man. This is the quietest I've ever seen you, Jedi. You sure do have a nice mic. I'm sorry, Jersey. He was here before I knew about you.

Speaker: I'm sorry, Jersey. He was here before I knew about you. And then he started sharing his purple crayons with me. And I didn't even know about you. You feel a little betrayed. i do, Jedi. Thank you, Jedi. Thank you for it. You complete me, Jedi.

Speaker: He is quiet. I have my application still pending for the Lazy and Shaman show. You didn't show up for your interview. We scheduled it three times and you are a no-show all three times. Oh, Brits. Jedi and Shaman and myself, we had a conference call.

Speaker: and Unfortunately, I'm stuck. It was more like a circle bird. That's not true. that's not true I hung up on the call when he said he was keeping you. I said, bitch, fuck off. And I hung up. I never wanted to keep you. I was trying to give you to them. slammed the phone down. And it was a rotary phone, too.

Speaker: So for me to pick it up, it was it was it was flame all heavy. It was an awkward circle. It was an awkward circle jerk. You know?

Speaker: oh Jedi made sure that both Shaman and I finished. that was That was very gracious of him. no congratulation first explain the minute The minute he picked up the phone, he came immediately. that's what started the meeting.

Speaker: It was really awkward after that. That's because I was in the pictures of Scott O before called me. The excuse to go clean himself up because it all got in his belly button. Sometimes that happens on the first time.

Speaker: He didn't even have a towel ready? What the fuck? No, he didn't. He was unprepared. He had a tissue. I didn't know that we were having a conference call and I was talking to him and my phone was ringing and I got overly excited and it was not my finest moment.

Speaker: not my finest moment Tissues and wet wipes. Yeah, for Glick, it should be like one little ply of tool paper. One ply. night One ply. One ply. That's all it takes. What the is happening tonight? like a A lot. all Everything's happening. A lot is happening tonight.

Speaker: Oh my god, dude. hiccups? yet. need to bend over? Oh my god. Do you steve can need me to make your bend over? Jersey's gonna

Speaker: I didn't say me. I said, do you need to bend over? Scotto? Come on, Scotto.

Speaker: yeah I heard that. If you but you don't bend over, you can at least lean forward little bit. It's going to the second box you've been in.

Speaker: Tonight. Tonight, yeah. You're fucking dumb. Oh, my God. You guys are awesome. Thank you guys for being here.

Speaker: I love hate you guys, man. I love him yeah and hate you guys. Yeah, dude. You guys make me contemplate and seriously consider unaliving myself on ah on a weekly basis.

Speaker: but seen I'm glad I can i'm glad i could do that for you. you know but But then Shaman comes in and I'm like, I have so much to live for. Shaman's here and then Shaman makes me If you work real hard, Glick, you could have no face too someday.

Speaker: Exactly. Yo, yo.

Speaker: yeah Yo, yo. It's a reminder that you just have too much. Yo, yo, yo, yo, yo. yo yo yo Mic check one, two. I'm about to drop the sickest rhyme of all time. we Yo, yo, mic check, mic check. Go DJ, one time.

Speaker: and You ready for that? Glicky, glicky. He rhymes on accident.

Speaker: oh that's so funny. He didn't mean to do that. they Oh, fuck. Everything I do. It's what I do. It's what happens. Off the top of the dome, son.

Speaker: Off the top of the dome. You can't even show your face. of it and whatever I shouldn't show my face. I shouldn't show my face. That's what's up,

Speaker: Hell yeah, we on the big screen. Let's go, baby. What are you talking about? My girl got us on the big screen. I like big screens.

Speaker: Who's your girl? Hey, girl. Hey, girl. Hi. your mom. Hi, new one. Hey, look my PMP. My mom's dead. Look at my PMP, son.

Speaker: Yo, look. That's my PMP right there. That's my PMP. What are you about? Again, PMP, son. What you ready? gang gang that's what we're talking about brit yeah yeah you know that's why glick believes in ghosts because he's that's his girl i okay i will say glick i am kind of surprised

Speaker: what's your I'm sorry. I'm sorry. i'm looking at you I'm looking at the chat. I'm sorry. Wait, what did you say? oh Let me listen to you. Everybody shut the fuck up so I can get my uninvited attention to Brittany. Shut the fuck up, motherfuckers.

Speaker: I'm just surprised that you actually believe in ghosts is what I wanted to say. One sentence. Are you serious? We've talked about it so much. wait Well, you and Blaze did.

Speaker: Yeah, Blaze is a skeptic and they make fun of me constantly for believing in ghosts. but I'm not allowed on there. so I only believe in ghosts because my daddy ghosted me when I was young. and That's why Xalvin hates corner stores and trips for milk.

Speaker: yeah but so man somon you Shaman, your dad didn't ghost you. He's looking for the right gallon of milk and that right pack of cigarettes before he comes home. He just wants what's best for you. My mom did the same shit.

Speaker: Like I said, I believe in the shit, but I don't try to like force it on anybody else. they don't believe, that's fine. Fatherhood? yeah What if Thomas added Brittany's cup together to look for milk? Jedi, you might be onto something, man.

Speaker: I'm just saying. Well, damn, Brittany. Don't lean closer to the mic and then fucking snort. ah yeah That makes all our fucking like laptops and shit rattle, man.

Speaker: How rude. I got beer. You got his fatherhood? but Right?

Speaker: but really it's it's in my beard it's it's fucking everywhere everywhere everywhere exactly same thing but about mother yeganty scott just slides in with the i here Everybody can breathe again and don't you talk about assholes.

Speaker: got that's why i did better way yeah scott doesn gonna have to pull a bla and tuck it up into his waistband

Speaker: and somebody's child what the fucking you do okay That's not right ah doess not really though, Lazy.

Speaker: he sucking the waistband that's why you don't tuck it into the waist It just emerges up into the waistband. i Yeah, you tuck it up and I've seen it.

Speaker: I don't have a dick, but I know I've seen it. I've seen a dick tucked before. You can't tell me different. I've seen it in the goddamn waistband, okay? You can't tell me different. Listen, when I was 13 years old, I was with my dad and we saw a guy in the park and he tucked it.

Speaker: He tucked his penis. We saw it. I had something wrong with you now. My dad said, don't look, Ethel. You know how I know that story is a fucking lie? Because you said you were at the park with your dad.

Speaker: Right. I wasn't going to call him out on it, but whatever. Shut your black ass up, Shaman. My mom is a transgender. Thank you very much. oh I was at the corner store with my EBT card. Mom and to dad, god damn it. Get me some chicken. god How dare you not respect their pronouns, okay? sorry so Sorry. Sorry, mama shaman.

Speaker: or um and My pronouns are tucked back. We call her mama shaman. Sorry, Mama Shaman. I didn't mean to. I like that. Okay, Glenn, you actually made it funny me for once.

Speaker: funny. that's that That's how you know people like each other when you can like fucking like rip on each other and nobody really takes it seriously and gets pissed off. Except Britney. She gets kind of mad sometimes. Fuck off, you little bitch.

Speaker: See? obviously yeah Love hates you too. hope you melt in the sun, you fucking dreamsicle. Right? don't want to melt. but don't want to melt um i didn' kind I do kind of blend in with the fucking wall behind me, don't I? It's like a head, just a head floating around and shit. know what's funny? noticed earlier, the background, like the background thing is like a beer can. It's got that like orange beer color and it goes right up into you. You're like the fucking shoot of the beer.

Speaker: yeah Right up into you, bro. That's me. I'm the shoot. Yeah, the poop shoot. The poop shoot. yeah I've been to black churches before, Robert. I know what you're talking about.

Speaker: I mean, I've been back by injection a few times. so i guess i

Speaker: jeda you never sir mix a lot said it best like be fuck so and you were the but kid did now With my dick I um sorry wait what um you're talking about talking i think it says what saw respect around it a't funny if i got to explain the shit to you guys man yeah the father and son the holy game stuff fuck up it's kind of like you do have to explain that Well, but you got it. You got it at the last second. I saw you.

Speaker: Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. cook Just explain it, Dad. Dad, explain your joke, Dad. Yeah, Dad. I'm blonde. Don't you know, Dad? That's what it is. She's blonde.

Speaker: Giggity. Stoner blonde. red? It's blonde. rat around gentlemen is it is it blon or red thing Because when you have it up, it looks red.

Speaker: Cherry blonde. it's It's like... it's Like strawberry blonde? She's got that slur blonde hair. But that's cherry, though.

Speaker: She's got that slur hair. Yeah, let's go. What color would you like? Slur number four, please. Slur number four. It's like mambo number five. I'm sorry. I'm sorry, ma'am. Glick was in here earlier. We're out of that.

Speaker: It's strawberry in these streets.

Speaker: put it all in his dumb characters all this is wait wait but we and it gli man it's scraw scrawberry it's scrawberry board yeah were replie a little though it's scrawlberry and newres I'm from Baltimore.

Speaker: I'm from Baltimore. boower Yeah, Robertson down south, man. It's strawberries in these streets. Go to the script club.

Speaker: Cheers, y'all. Cheers. Are you going to actually take a drink this time? Okay, there you go. Drinking some of that Tittos.

Speaker: but me She has an empty cup inside of it She spit it back into She was like Yeah I seen that move in 8th grade At the house party That's what they do on dogma You drank your backwash You drank your backwash To prove a point That's water I have a lot Tito's don't have a worm in it The fuck

Speaker: No, that's gold slugger, isn't it? No. he Tequila. You thought she was a red hair. No, she's blind. She's fucking blind. I have to go off camera to laugh.

Speaker: Robert, I tried to tell these fools earlier. I tried to tell these fools earlier I got my black card. I got my ghetto pass. They didn't believe me. You know. believe you I never had the warm tequila.

Speaker: Wait. clickckman like Just because you got on the bus today, that does not mean you have your black heart. hang out and this Just because you said hi to a black person today. That's my friend. Mom, look, that's my friend.

Speaker: oh oh phone I got black friends. My fucking niece. who suggested any Anybody she said hi to, that was her fucking friend, man. That's my friend. Bitch, you waved at each other in passing. Shut the fuck up. That's a homeless person that wanted a dollar.

Speaker: Exactly. yes Yes, Robert. bottom of I'm not racist. I watch black people on TV. so Yeah, I watch well he is Look as white with the door skin. Jedi said I watch BET. That's what I would say. um a like um' like I'm Soul train. watch Arsenio Hall. Oh, you're white fuck.

Speaker: I only watch The Family Feud with Steve Harvey. I watch your mama. no who I watch your mama too. Fucking white people. Fucking white people, bro.

Speaker: Yo, mama watches me.

Speaker: Perry presents white people that don't think they're racist. I'm not even going to say anything. Obviously, I'm white. whatever. But yeah, your mama.

Speaker: Hell, Jedi did the dance down the middle of the line on Soul Train. What are you talking about, that nobody saw as I went viral, okay? Lazy is the reason they have the line.

Speaker: everybody Everybody thought their TV was broke because it was this white glitch on the screen. I will you how fucking move right and that's actually how they do it the Full screen, Brittany. Full screen, Brittany.

Speaker: ah and do And do your arms while you're doing the moonwalk. That's like one-upping Michael Jackson if you do that. don't know how to make her full screen. I don't know how to make her full screen.

Speaker: Oh my god, he just backstageed her. You click on her and you make it bigger. There you go. We're ready. corn and you make it bigger that's like yeah they ro there you go ready but

Speaker: yeah yeah yeah eyes draw um back ra walk that's That's exactly how I She's a goddamn gremlin.

Speaker: i told scott it fli that shit she's a fuck she got a floorwa yeah i'm just fucking growing that was way better than i could ever do but she's a g grimlin Dude, it's better when my feet aren't fucking sweaty, okay?

Speaker: Well, dry them off. You have paper towels? Listen, you had one chance. Why are your feet sweaty? Why are your feet sweaty? That's the only thing that's sweaty right now. feet sweat when I get drunk. My man, Robert. The lower gravity out on the moon makes my feet dry. I can't move more. My man was about to finish. My man, Robert.

Speaker: Sprat. yeaha Sprat. When drink, I get the feet sweats. I feel like Robert and Brittany are going to be married someday. I know, right?

Speaker: I know a

Speaker: will. Robert's going to lock her ass in cage in basement. wife. You're my wife now. You're mine. You're mine now, woman.

Speaker: How'd you lock them in the basement? Hey girl, got you out of them screech and now you my wife. No, I got my bros that take care me. You Mrs. Robert Platinum now.

Speaker: Bitch. Bitch. Bitch. Brittany, if you're relying on Glick to take care of you, you are in fucking trouble, girlfriend. and I'm taking care of her. Your fucking feet going to start sweating.

Speaker: Robert Bucco's going to be like, you thirsty? My feet are sweating just thinking about it. I also can't moonwalk now. With sweaty feet, that's going to make it real hard to spin over to the front.

Speaker: I can't moonwalk. Dude, I literally i won the moonwalk competition at Dew Tour. i don't know if you guys know what that is. Yeah, dude. I have the fucking moonwalk. She said, I got the foot plaque to prove it.

Speaker: I do. I have the whole fucking thing. um like Just because you're fucking winning moon type doesn't mean she's gonna fucking win the moonwalk. In reality, nobody's ever walked on the moon.

Speaker: Do you know what the detour is? Ooh, there we go. don't want talk about that. I'm getting tired up there. no Hey, nobody cares about your moonwalk. Robert said if Brittany was married to me, she would smile so much, she would get face cramps. Hey, you don't remember the moon shoes they used to sell back in the day?

Speaker: I used to have some. They were great. They're just these big rubber bands. Yeah, bounce. It was the dumbest shit I've ever seen in my life. Yeah, my It feels like you're walking on the moon.

Speaker: Okay, literally, the moon shoes were, like, getting you prepared to be drunk in your mid-20s, okay? Because that's what it felt like walking in those was, like, when you're fucking wasted and trying to, like, stand up straight.

Speaker: And that's all they were. Oh, shut up. I can't fucking get into where I'm going, dude. Scotto, that is the greatest screen grab of all time. Yeah. already made it as BFB. I did. What?

Speaker: what ah sorry you guys we slept with Oh my gosh. It has Courtney Love vibes to it. It's got Courtney Love vibes to You are our little gremlin.

Speaker: You are amazing. That is amazing. You know what? Scatto knows how to take everybody's thing and just make it funny. Yes. That is our little gremlin right there. Speaking of Scatto, we're going to see some Scatto's work for my PFP.

Speaker: yeah yeah and Oh my god

Speaker: god. Just saying, Brittany, I feel your pain. I feel your pain. A little gremlin right there. Just gremlin it out. Whatever, man.

Speaker: Doing what gremlins do. Hello, ladies and gentlemen. help me oh What up, bitches? My name is Brittany. I'm a gremlin. yeah i live that gremlin life yeah it's britney clearly nobody's gotten wet yet i don't think anybody's trying now except for robert bladdenum so you can't talk and so and we drink so yeah and did by do that Angel, I love you. q are i robert platinum Robert Platinum is is is love he's in love. and

Speaker: Brittany is a bad man with Jim. I'm a bad man with Jim. He said wife-a. He wife-a. Cheers. I moonwalked to the bathroom to take a piss and I pissed all over my carpet all the way to the bathroom. What the fuck? Bro, you should get a diaper or something.

Speaker: not my well

Speaker: No, DUTOR is a skating, surfing competition, BMX thing that it was a little beach. And so I won the moonwalking competition at the DUTOR.

Speaker: That's all I wanted to fucking say. and I have card that says my profession is moonwalking. So fuck all of you. Do you have a carpet that says it? No. It's a carpet.

Speaker: oh What's carved in your carpet? What? Crabs. Crabs are in the carpet. Crabs on field. Yeah. That was good.

Speaker: It depends, Robert.

Speaker: What does 80-year-old pussy taste like? Depends. I love that fucking joke. I say that all the time. Scotto, I love you. You're a fucking champion.

Speaker: Scotto is fucking champion. What's the hardest part about eating vegetables? What did he win? Click. Click. Click. Click

Speaker: looks to asshole What's the hardest part eating eat vegetables? ah Getting the diaper out the way. ah Yeah, see who's hiding? Yeah, we're going to get arrested, dude. Oh, first time, we're canceled.

Speaker: I used to have a co-worker that was a fucking idiot, and used to say, you're so I wouldn't tell him this to his face, but I'd say he's so stupid, his idea of a porno magazine was the Vegetarian Times. Yeah.

Speaker: but of love that did he get it or did no

Speaker: he's like my friend scotto funny how the dumb motherfuckers you work with always think you're your friend and shit because you're picking on them you're too stupid to fucking pick it up

Speaker: Like people on panels, yeah. Oh my god, dude.

Speaker: you motherfuckers say about me when I went to piss? Yeah, fuck you, dude. really ham muroc Orange man bad. Orange man bad. Creamsicles terrible. Creamsicles suck.

Speaker: Creamsicles sucks. I will never wear this fucking shirt again. I'm burning it after tonight. No, it's just a combination with the hat, too. you know yeah yeah Yeah. look like my car. My car is orange, and I don't like it. Oh, shit. You look like a Nissan Rogue.

Speaker: like i don't yeah good you look like a niar road Hey, we talked about that. have a Nissan Rogue. I'm not the only one. All black. I knew somebody had one.

Speaker: Yeah, we talked about it. You told me your car I told you mine. i have a Nissan Rogue with all fucking interiors all and everything else. And the parts red. yeah That's right. Nice.

Speaker: I just figured she drove a Nissan Rogue. Now I know why. What the fuck's wrong with my hat, man? Why are you guys picking on my hat and shit? love it. Good game.

Speaker: I like the rogue though like the rogue oh my god no he did not no he did not yeah your beard still matches your complexion and your shirt matches my pubic hair too oh my fuck I mean if we're gonna compare shit fuck you know matches my chest hair

Speaker: i mean if we're going to compare shit fuck broken matches my chest there what about your ass hair does that match ass hair no i shave that i shave that ah good man good quick likes it clean you know oh you shave all your i i like i like a little i like i like a little chesticles little chesticle hair he's like he's like i'm not gonna go there if i could

Speaker: so Yeah, let's keep this a family show. There you go. I'm going to go smoke some weed. I will be back. Click's like, I like that recent stripe. Just not between the cracks of your ass.

Speaker: Yeah. Hey, Robert Fallon, Chitlins. I saw that, Scotto. You put it up quick, but I saw it. I've seen it too, Scotto.

Speaker: Chitlins, and if you know what they are, you're not going them. If you smell em you're not going to eat them. Yeah, I agree.

Speaker: had chitlins for the first time down South Carolina and I was like, yeah, never again. Hey, bring them on. Bring them on. i'm um um I'm here for it, Robert. Bring me them chitlins on. I know what they are.

Speaker: I know what they smell like when you're cooking them, but I don't give a damn. They're delicious. Well, it's like fucking liver and onions. Liver and onions smell fucking amazing. Who the fuck ever said liver and onions smells amazing?

Speaker: What the fuck? If it's cooked right, if it's fucking cooked right. Oh, my God. Well, okay. There you go. Well, my mom couldn't cook. used to make liver and onions the time, and I couldn't stand on shit. Jersey said there you go. I mean, I'll eat the fuck out of some chitlins.

Speaker: Some chitlins and collard greens? Yeah. Oh, I love me some collard greens. but look How do you like chitlins but you don't like collard greens, Angel? What the fuck?

Speaker: I don't like any of them. That's all fucking nasty shit. Shit. Your accent just slipped out, man. don't like that shit. Hey, man. i had shittlins i had chitlins up here in Ohio shit there one ever moved to south carolina and i got a buddy of mine and got invited to the family, the family cookout, to the barbecue, to the cookout. bbque

Speaker: And I was, I was like, but yeah, I walked up there. Who the fuck the white boy is?

Speaker: Cops, cops, cops, Scott, you the shout out to my boy Dom. Shout to my boy Dom, man. Love you, brother. Uh, Good people, good time. We had we we we had a fantastic time. i man and yeah Anybody that says the anybody that says what cut when if cut fuck, I can't talk. ah Stroke much? No.

Speaker: Anybody that says fucking chitlins smell good if they're cooked properly are fucking lying to you. No, chitlins smell terrible. They're fucking disgusting. They hit different. They hit different, man. I love me some chitlins and collard beans.

Speaker: Chitlins and and some cornbread. i'm I'm down with all that except the chitlins. Chitlins are amazing. you can smell You can smell South Carolina all the way to Virginia. And it ain't a good smell.

Speaker: It ain't a good smell, but it's tasty. Collard greens, mustard greens, all shit. go for that and Bearded dragons, and that's about it. Hey, we still cook a whole-ass pig in Ohio, too. Well, coard collard greens is one of those, if they're not cooked right, they taste like shit, too, though.

Speaker: Yeah. i mean I mean, whoever... But if they're cooked right, they man, they're fucking... I mean, good shit. I mean, we do that shit in Orlando. Because the whole pig is this shit.

Speaker: that's what we do up here in Ohio, too, man. We feel thats we dig a whole-ass pig, man. You throw that whole sumbitch right into that hole. That's right here, too. They put that fucker on a huge ass rotisserie.

Speaker: a

Speaker: I got... Baby, what are chitlins?

Speaker: You asked my kind of wondering like oh My girlfriend asked, what are chitlins? and It's actually... it's it's it's For those of you who don't know, it's chitterlings.

Speaker: It's chitterlings, also known as chickens. Basically, it's it's the intestines of a pig.

Speaker: I i mean, there's no there's no way around it. It's it's the intestines of a pig. See, that's one of those things that makes me think, like,

Speaker: Like shit we eat, right? That makes me go by Who the fuck for the very first time said We should try eating this You know? Who was the first person that said Let me try eating some fucking pig intestines Tell everybody that That wouldn't waste anything I mean, yeah, there's that it's it'ss society Yeah, there's that, but i look Hey, look I mean, i mean let's be honest let's be honest Let's do our history Let's do our history And dive into the history Y'all remember, Glick has a black friend.

Speaker: Remember that. I have i basic too yes question needs buck when needs bus forget that basically black at this point. Back in the day, slaves were not fed very well, so they they found other means necessary.

Speaker: And that's where chitlins came from. Let's be honest. I'm just going to do this just because I'm a smoker. Oh, shit. you doing? up girl i you doing

Speaker: I could have sworn that was from the where it fucking was. It's not disgusting. It sounds disgusting. It smells disgusting. But when you taste them, oh. And it is disgusting. Have you ever had cow tongue?

Speaker: Cow tongue? Yes. Cow tongue is delicious. It's so good. Just like Rocky Mountain oysters cooked, right? Motherfuckers actually taste good. So what basically, for those of you who don't know, what Mo Dog said is that he enjoys having balls in his mouth.

Speaker: I mean, you know. As long as they're cooked right. Exactly. They've got to be cooked right, man. i didn't for mushrooms i didn't know that I didn't know that. I was eating them like for the first time. I didn't know what it was. i was like nobody swallow there was There was like nine or ten of them on the fucking you know like on the plate or whatever. and i was I was on like number four or five. and Then somebody told me what it was. and and I was too much because I was already bragging about the fucking taste of them.

Speaker: so I couldn't be like, oh, this is disgusting. Stop dropping comments down, Brittany. Fucking eating a rest, motherfucker. I know you are. Deep-throat in balls.

Speaker: pop and you're hot right and you're not And you're not wrong, my dog. Rocky Mountain oysters are good. They are bull balls. man Robert Platinum always got my back.

Speaker: I'm not speaking out of turn. I'm not being racist. Soul food. Came from the slaves. She said you will not kiss me if you eat that.

Speaker: i went back oh that so well baby i don't I don't have nobody to cook me chitlins no more and I don't know how to cook them and I won't ever attempt to cook them.

Speaker: He's sticking with the testicles. mean i don't got I got no nobody going to cook me Rocky Mountain oysters and ain't nobody going to cook me chitlins unless Robert Platinum hooked me up with a chitlin. I'll fucking swallow some balls but you're not putting intestines in my mouth.

Speaker: ah yes ah Welcome back, Jedi. What's going on, Jedi? Nice little nap. I should have stayed John longer, okay? I don't... Dude, what are you talking about? You're talking about eating fucking, like, rotten brains and shit with Drew on stream. like Like, you guys are never gonna fucking do that, but...

Speaker: yeah what were the brains you guys are gonna eat pig brains or some shit i i i did he has a whole video no you didn't he touched it with your tongue and spit that out and it went three hours in your backyard it was spaghetti you didn't you didn't eat it hope you guys have a great night yeah i took one bite and that was good night good night good night we love you Love you, girl. and i Who's out? You look you leaving, Britt?

Speaker: I'm beautiful. There's shadow. Have a girl. you me like No, You need not leave. are zoom is tell me so leave and i leave You We'll be quiet. Talk.

Speaker: tell i'm out again later go but love you girl but love hate you if brittany's leaving i'm leaving goodbye There we go.

Speaker: should you Well, Blazer's leaving. Blazer's leaving. I guess I'll stay. All Chitlins are considered a part of soul food. I love fucking soul food.

Speaker: I love me some soul food, man. Yeah, soul food's Y'all put testicles in your mouth? Why do Robert Culler asses out?

Speaker: Y'all put testicles in your mouth, but you won't put intestines in your mouth? Bitches. okay nice Sorry, sorry. Sorry, Scotto.

Speaker: By the way, do you know who hates soul food? Gingers. That's because I'm a blonde. So here we are. It's so fun to eat your own soul. there it Listen, you don't know what Ginger likes to eat. She never told you.

Speaker: So, Jim, did you like the pig brains? No. girl oh You should play your little video for him, Jedi.

Speaker: Go ahead. You should play the video. Drew has the video. I don't have the video. Oh, Scotto has it. you got na and then You can play Scotto. Scotto's like the fucking Library Congress. That motherfucker's got everything, man. was going to say, Scotto's got everything. Scotto's got shit from the internet before the internet was fucking real.

Speaker: i don't know he like do i and you so did I don't even know if it's make it to the shit process I might throw it right back up.

Speaker: <unk> not That's not Jedi that's some dude with bunch of tattoos inspiration for why we did it

Speaker: by the way scotto can you send me to but yeah i ask betu but he sends it that's not jedi that's some du with the mu a tattoo no that this is little the inspiration for why we did it Wait, is that is that the dude that fucking killed himself? catch all you in a little I see it. I'm more hungry than I want to see it right now.

Speaker: you been and maning show women this wait we wait for this is when they used to have a goie i yeah um i want i want to see it i just i'm more hungry than i want to see it right now no man Yeah, you don't want to see this if you're youre about to eat. You got to just... to... we... how do we how do we ah yeah I'm opening the can right now.

Speaker: Okay. I'm fucking scared. Wait, what did you do? Buy can of fucking... feel like need to... You bought a can of fucking pig brains? hi Oh, it's already pungent. No.

Speaker: Oh, for fuck sake. No.

Speaker: yeah oh through fuck sake no yeah I'm going to vomit for you. No, hold on. hold let me Let me get the fucking shit one more bottom for um it looks like get it out you're get wrong and you got to come away dog got oh stinks so fucking no this is so much worse than i was expecting i guess i can smell it through the camera that ain't spam motherfucker yeah

Speaker: plug your nose you won teach the thing and so so stinky yeah you that um like cleveland Cleveland's on panel like this shit's

Speaker: it's like yeah potatoes almost

Speaker: guys shit i just like know i better be your best friend for life You are? Watch how fast this motherfucker runs.

Speaker: me take yeah no it What was the pig thinking? With that first taste, you should be able to tell me what the pig was thinking.

Speaker: That's the same thing Scott who did the first time he looked a pussy. Get that shit out in the room. i gotta I'm going to throw this outside right now.

Speaker: It stinks so fucking hot. didn't even eat them, man. You didn't even eat it. Come on, man. It was nasty as fuck, dude. It was...

Speaker: Okay, so now so in the video that we watched that Drew was playing, like there was like big chunks of brain and stuff. This whole thing was just like it was like soup. i and then there were like ah why did you umm It's just weird that your local grocery store sells cans of pig brains. No, they don't. they don't I ordered that off Amazon.

Speaker: um But it was the exact same brand, the same thing that the dude did in the video. Thanks, Jeff. Thanks, guys, though. Dude. And so, so anyway, it was not anywhere close to the video that drew is playing. Cause we watched, okay. So drew had a long stream about like this guy eating all this nasty shit and the pork brains or whatever.

Speaker: But like in the video, he opened the exact same brand. I literally got the exact same shit he did. And, but like it was soup and it was fucking gross. It was like, and it stunk real bad. Like it smelled like it was, it was like eating a corpse.

Speaker: but yeah it was Maybe they have different um like crunchy smooth. No, no, no. Literally, there's okay there's a two pack. oh so i ordered ah You can only get it in like packs of two. So I literally have another can of shit in my pantry. yeah Open it now. Taste it. Prove it. i i could I could do it on here, but I'm not going to.

Speaker: He's like, I could. But he saved it because he's like, just in case I ever need to eat it. You know what? Pull that shit out at like the next Christmas party with the family. It might come in handy someday.

Speaker: Hey, feed it feed it to some unwilling guests and see if they like it. Right? See if one of your kids have one of those food drive things where they drink cans of food. No, that's what I... Oh, my God. That's suck and evil. I'm donating this to homeless people. They can eat grains.

Speaker: but yeah Oh, my God. Change it. Put a fake label on it. Right? Shama sounds like you're fucking big brains right now, man. know what do you use Yes, sir. I mean, some brains and shit ones. He's probably eating a fucking Reese's peanut butter cup.

Speaker: Do you have a slight? I mean, some mom, he don't know what his mouth long enough. i Yeah, no, yeah you fucking didn't actually you didn't actually eat it.

Speaker: yes i did well enough I put it in my mouth, I spit half of it out. and You didn't swallow. I did part of it.

Speaker: That's what she said. So what did your backyard let smell like for days after you used that shit out in the grass? No, okay, so I have a bunch of feral cats and they fucking devoured it. Oh my God.

Speaker: Literally, I went outside next day and the can was clean as a whistle. That's like when you watch dogs eat cat shit and and people do like let them muzzle up and lick their fucking mouths and our whistles Are whistles really known for being like sterile and clean?

Speaker: yeah yeah What? Whistles? Flowrider said blow my whistle. yeah

Speaker: there's There's a whistle. like Why is that the standard?

Speaker: and What the fuck are you talking about, man? I'm lost. not pussy. Like a feline.

Speaker: would you ever eat a cat ya i do cat i eat cat a cat fried right cat not pussy um like a feline You guys want to hear a disgusting story?

Speaker: This is disgusting, man. i wasn't The first time I went to the fucking Philippines, this fucking gunnery sergeant that I worked with like was married to a Filipino woman who was like highly connected out in like the community and shit.

Speaker: and he was like He asked he ask i got three or four of us sergeants, he's like, hey, you guys want to go experience something you'll never ever fucking experience again in your life? and Of course, we're like, fuck yeah.

Speaker: Takes us to this like exclusive this house that has this exclusive back room to it and shit, right? And we sit down, and there's a round fucking table that has holes cut out in it, right? Like, all around the fucking table. And you sit in front of the fucking... You sit in front of the the hole, right?

Speaker: Yeah, yeah, yeah. I've seen this. Yeah, I mean, do you want me to tell it? Because i don't want to get your fan of trouble. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. So, they... So what they have done prior to this, and this is a delicacy in the Philippines, right? This wasn't just like animal cruelty.

Speaker: This is a fucking delicacy to them. listen no they They cut the top part of the scalp off of a fucking monkey. And the monkey's still fucking alive. Fully fucking alive, right? That's an Indiana Jones movie. They put it up. They put the the fucking skull in that hole in the table.

Speaker: and tighten some clamps down to hold that shit in place. And then motherfuckers sit around the table and sit there and, like, pick the brain out and fucking eat it. And these monkeys are fucking screaming the whole fucking time underneath the fucking table. so Like, flailing their fucking arms and legs. And it was fucking... monkey brain It was fucking terrible, dude. Like, I felt so fucking bad, man.

Speaker: I will say you had a mild experience because... The videos I've seen with this, the actual experiences, they put these monkeys in their stable and clamp them down and stuff like that.

Speaker: And then everybody at the table sitting down, they give them these like, like when you eat like, like crab legs or or lobsters, they they give you those little mallets. They give people mallets and they literally, while this monkey's alive, they crack its fucking skull. no. Yeah. Yeah. We didn't do that shit. Yeah.

Speaker: yeah Yeah, we didn't do that shit. like the The top of the skull was already fucking cut off, man. it was good It was rough. ain't even gonna lie, man. it was fun I've seen some shit in my day, man, and that was fucking rough, man. But everybody everybody everybody felt obliged to fucking do it because like we got invited to go do this shit. and it's like Did you try them? Yeah, yeah, yeah. Yeah, we did. That was the brain.

Speaker: It was fucking disgusting. It was disgusting. Ladies and gentlemen, But you know how many things are overseas that are considered delicacies that back in the Western world were like, that's fucking sick, man.

Speaker: Yeah, it's normal over there. It is. Over here, it's not so much. No, I've had, I've, um, yes, yes, Kayla. You know, we are ridiculous, baby. But yeah, I've eaten like monkey on a stick and shit, like walking down the streets of the Philippines and everything else. Yeah.

Speaker: And I ain't gonna lie, it's it's the cliche fucking thing of like, it tastes a lot like chicken. Well, that's what like chimpanzees, what you know, they need is soass eat them like while they're alive. they can' your johnny bunngs i see you. on. alive. worry about him. ah First and foremost, Robert Platinum.

Speaker: Some hot sauce. This is what's wrong with you people. You can't just put hot sauce on everything to make it better. Stop it. No, you got to put ranch in hot sauce. Yeah, has is they need ran ran I you sauce. You don't have the flip side of the coin.

Speaker: That's what's wrong with white people. They want to put ranch on everything. Ranch in hot sauce. Don't deal. Some people are like, don't taste good. White people are like, don't taste good. right Ranch. Lick forgets he's one of us.

Speaker: I'm not white. He pulled his black card out earlier. He didn't put it away Well, it was a forgery, so it doesn't matter. Hold ladies and gentlemen. Ladies and gentlemen, if I may have the floor for just one second.

Speaker: I got to welcome our next guest. I got i gotta i gotta to properly welcome our next guest. Johnny Ball. don't know where he's been all night. I haven't seen this in forever. That's why asked multiple times because anybody heard from him for a long time. I haven't seen him in forever, but the one and only.

Speaker: Johnny's back. but um but no bad Johnny What's up, Good to see

Speaker: what so fidel see y none watch i go but what's the weather i like this time of year a ah shitty and the taxes are high The taxes are high. Not by coincidence, but I got to head out. night, Shaman. Take care, Shaman. Good night, Shaman.

Speaker: Love you, brother. Take care, man. Take care, bro. Robert Flander.

Speaker: take careman yeah rubb plan what it was one of ah I'm an brother. am appropriating everything.

Speaker: Come on now.

Speaker: i his wild face like what are you appropating our culture and am i am appropriate sometimes just want to be one now Like black beard wrinkles

Speaker: so that's what youre saying it's like yeah and you be bye black with the beard with the voice well no cracking no wrinkles ah but gave the fuck no wrinkles but around yeah black don't crack i'm um um i got i got the wrinksles i'm getting old

Speaker: yep Oh, that's some bullshit. Black does crack. oh i'm a brother I'm a brother in disguise, motherfuckers. You heard of Shea Butter, motherfucker? like is the sa um um the ga I'm the I'm the dude playing the dude. What the fuck you been up to, Johnny?

Speaker: Shit, I've been getting desk work done. Fucking sister came up from Florida, and since she did, we've been busy as shit. Nice. What do you mean, desk work? What's that mean? ah Tattoo design. Shit like that, working on progress health.

Speaker: Oh, okay. Cool. Hell yeah.

Speaker: Glick wants a tattoo of Scott's dick on his forearm. Can you hook him up? Uh... Well, to get the whole curvature and the details I'm about explain. To get all that down is going to take some time. Scott said it's going to go from the elbow to the wrist.

Speaker: so Yeah, I might as well just down fucking legs. There's going to be some details to work with. ankle to the thigh. This might be like an eight ten hour tattoo, just saying. It's going to be a very detailed process. Multiple sessions.

Speaker: See? I don't know what's up. Your forearm might just get stiff at times when you don't realize it. What's up, Rex? There's things you can do for that.

Speaker: Cockwork. Oh, shit. Cockwork. How the fuck have you been? I ain't seen you in forever, bro. What up, Rex? o Rex, good to see you. Rex, I got a question, man. Do you have a song for that?

Speaker: for a dick tattooed arm I sent Rex an invite to a rather hopping discord server and yesterday in the afternoon I see him hanging out in BC singing shit like Eagles or Metallica stuff that'll get him struck on YouTube but he's just having the time of his life just karaoke for everybody else because she

Speaker: what up Rex get up here man yeah Rex get up here i you put this rather hilling yeah That's the warmest invite I've ever heard. Get up here, you fucking slut.

Speaker: Get your slut ass up here, man. Get your fucking whore ass up here. It's fucking pinned. It's not hard to find. Don't be a bitch, Clockwork.

Speaker: Don't be a biatch. Don't be such a Fidel Bongs. don't we such don't be such a fidel bos Oh Look I had things that Came in the way That was That was a very convincing statement that didn you Look guys I had Well fuck I wish had things that came in the way Came Well literally and figuratively okay Ooh Johnny Bong's got some What's up I mean some pussy I don't know

Speaker: Look, there's hobbies, eh? yeah da it's I mean, we all have hobbies.

Speaker: One of my favorite hobbies is Jedi's mom. Oh, wait, Jedi's not even here anymore. Where the fuck Jedi go?

Speaker: don't know.

Speaker: Like a turd on Metamucil, he just slid the fuck out. He's just slid.

Speaker: He opened up fucking can of testing. He's fucking devouring that shit. I think he's going to go eat somewhere. yeah He's in the pantry digging that other can out. I think he wanted to go eat up some can-o pig brains.

Speaker: If you're going to eat pig brains, you've got to eat them fresh. You can't eat them out of a can that you ordered from Amazon and it took a week to get there. You've got to eat them fresh. You've got to sit around a table that's got holes in it. Well, no. i mean My experience with that was not...

Speaker: necessarily a table with holes in it but it was sometimes slaughtering we're we're slaughtering this pig and this

Speaker: is a delicacy so yeah cut it open it pull it cut it little open fire a little twist turn twist turn twist turn eat and i mean don That's just it, man. we Being stationed in the Philippines and Korea and Japan, I've i've eaten so much weird-ass fucking shit. i'll eat any I'll try anything once, man. I love trying all kinds of stuff.

Speaker: The next crazy shit that Jedi and um Drew were going to do was Balut. Remember that? they stopp I know. Yeah, I'm the one that brought it up to them because I was telling them about how I ate fucking Balut in the Philippines.

Speaker: nasty fucking shit. What's going on with you, Rex? What up, Rex? I decided to join while y'all talking about killing and eating shit. Okay, fair enough. There you go. yeah

Speaker: But no, I've actually slaughtered pigs with my great-grandfather back in the day. They take the bladder, blow tie the ends of it off, blow it up, and use it as a football. Yeah.

Speaker: Yeah. I knew Clockwork was going to come up here. It's been a hot minute since we hung out together. Oh, yeah. I've been busy, man. I've been yeah harvesting pumpkins for Halloween and Thanksgiving and Christmas and all that good shit so so so like you say yeah oh shit. the block ter yeah yeah harvard Like said, I've done the pig slaughtering.

Speaker: It's not that rare that you you're slaughtering that pig and you're doing everything and you cut the hat Cut the head off. Cut you some slices of brain out. You got your open fire, your little flip-flop, flip-flop, and you eat it.

Speaker: Well, i like to I like to fry mine up a little bit. But yeah, fresh. great Fresh. A little butter, a little salt. Yeah.

Speaker: I'm a note of pig bladders. Artists in the 1800s would mix their paints and they would be stored in pig bladders. so no no That the only kind of container they had. Yeah.

Speaker: Yeah, back in the day, you used all the pig. You didn't just eat the ham pocket. everything. Yeah, my man, you can hear by his accent. My man knows what... yeah yeah iin't I ain't talking bullshit.

Speaker: Yeah, I'm guessing pigs aren't the only things that Rex is slaughtered. We'll talk about that on this one. Yeah, we'll talk about that on this one. I mean... What's happening? I've done cattle, I've done chickens.

Speaker: Oh, hey, a chicken is funny as fuck. You cut its head off and it'll just run around for about 10 minutes. Talk work. You ever done the... you ever done the You know... That's how I know how to do it. Yeah. Take that chicken. Come up from behind and grab it and just...

Speaker: come up from behind and grab it and just Hit him with that and just let him flop around for a couple minutes. Wait, are you talking about are you talking about snakes or are you talking about chickens? Either way. That's the same way can kill snake. as You can do it on both of them. I'm a fan of doing the little butchery knife.

Speaker: Twist and jerk. Gotta get a little rubik. You come up behind that chicken and give him a little What's up? everything nothing to Nothing to worry about. and yet Snatch them and you hit them.

Speaker: Two quick moves. I wouldn't have believed it. I heard stories about my grandfather using black snakes like a whip and he'd whip them so hard their head would fly off.

Speaker: That's what I was talking about. yeah yeah I wouldn't have believed it if I hadn't seen him do it. He fucking snatched one up out the yard and whacked. It's on the wrist, man. It's on the wrist.

Speaker: Yeah. Rat snake. Get him with that rat. Yeah. Oh, yeah. ah self again I've seen my buddy's grandfather do that. If I could snatch a rat snake up out the barn and at the same time crack a horse right in the ass with it and get the horse out of wherever the fuck it was.

Speaker: yeah Well, cheers to the twist and jerk, man. Cheers. Cheers. hey Country folk is coming out

Speaker: yes

Speaker: jersey du passed out on me robbing yeah um they just fucking du oh

Speaker: But yeah, in the pumpkin patch, I ain't seen the great pumpkin yet, but I've seen a couple of eight-foot black snakes in there. Yeah, so I just let them be. ah I wasn't going snatch them up.

Speaker: Uh-uh. So are you help are you helping somebody like harvest the pumpkins, or do you have a pumpkin patch? No, I'm helping. they These are like football-feel sized pumpkin patches. Oh, really? Okay. Yeah, so...

Speaker: We've got all the big ones, like the medium-ish little ones. and Yeah, that's what's left. We get you last. I want one of them pumpkins that you can might get down into. Like them huge ones.

Speaker: oh we also we we haven't We haven't entered the kink part of the show yet. I got a penchant for pumpkins and apple pie. hold on a pumpkinna and but yeah i got to pinch it for pumpkins and apple pie on we we like We've got this little baby gourd right here.

Speaker: think this is perfect for you. This might be the right side, Hoss. He's like, nah, I blow the back out of that motherfucker. That's the only thing, Hoss, is blowing the out of. You're growing that fro back out, man. I like it. Oh, yeah.

Speaker: no ginger um actually there were actually ill over that i growing it get in growing a f throw back out man i like it yeah About another six months it'll be. yeah yeah did I told you the first time I saw you on panel, you reminded me of my brother, right? Because my brother was a white boy, but he had a fucking afro.

Speaker: Don't know where the hell that came from, but you know, there's one woodshed in every family, I guess. That's a Jew, bro. you know ah Yeah, he had a straight up fucking afro and shit, dude.

Speaker: when you're white and you got one of those those Jew for you got Jew in your family yeah shit my family's a mutt man we got a little bit of everything my dad's got a Jew for my pops has got a Jew for him man as he's got like a straight ass if he grows his shit out like it's like boom like just perfect pick that shit out oh i can go ahead go ahead go ahead Tyrone he'd work that shit he'd walk around with the pig stuck up in it and shit you know like Dave, you know you're not black, right?

Speaker: Hey, you know what? Just because our skin tone says one thing, don't mean this. Robert knows what I'm talking about. I'm black. Got the melanoma coming out or whatever.

Speaker: Oh, yeah. Robert knows what I'm talking about. I'm black as shit. No, you're not. Angel's like bullshit.

Speaker: Yeah. If you're black, I'm Michael Jackson. I mean, might be white as shit, but I got black tendencies. No, you don't.

Speaker: ah black tendies now no you don' oh I mean, you can say that all you want. So many jokes there could have been made. yeah right thing i would i will i will digress, though. have black feet the thing The one thing about me that I wish was black enough, I wish I had this much black meat that I would have went and gotten milk and never came back home.

Speaker: Because fuck them kids. Fuck them kids, man. but put Douches. Papa's got to go get... Papa was a Rolling Stone, man.

Speaker: When does it dan go roll stone

Speaker: a dad joke become a dad joke?

Speaker: When he goes for milk and doesn't come back. I was waiting. i was trying to I was trying to do that math. When you met Blake. When you met Blake.

Speaker: Looks like the dad ain't daddin'. The dad ain't daddin'. Look, I'm a good goddamn dad. I know my fucking oldest daughter. What's up, Megan? Oh, hey, Megan.

Speaker: but i um mes bank what's up megan man yeah i't m bla hey wait Shut up, Sean. Shut up, Fennell.

Speaker: That's some AI shit. That You look like you're about 12 in that picture, dude. Hey, you said it. Oh, shit.

Speaker: um you know you look like you're about twelve in that picture dude i you said

Speaker: oh shit Holy fuck, I'm going to sell it. You have your brains reconnected together. My brain's not functioning.

Speaker: my I'm sorry, my brain's not functioning. I got a brain malfunction after I'm reading a message. Wait, hold on a second.

Speaker: I'm not going to speak. You're okay. Suck it, Seattle. Suck it, Seattle. Nobody likes your bitch asses.

Speaker: No condolences. What the fuck?

Speaker: Oh, she said the Marine. Come on. Mariners. nothing them Mariners. Oh, excuse me. Mariners. You got a buffer. now My brain is still trying to buffer. They're trying. I'm not firing.

Speaker: I never said I was firing on all cylinders here. Okay. because there are You know what, Rex? All cylinders are overrated, man. Oh, well, fair enough.

Speaker: I said I wasn't going to get drunk tonight. he's putting on the Steelers. oh Oh, my God. Kick that motherfucker off, panel. Yeah. It was all good to today, shit, Hoss. What did you do, Hoss?

Speaker: My bitch. Hey, Hoss, tell us you like to touch little boys without telling us you like to touch little boys. Yeah, damn Oh, it's fucking brother and he wait he's finally joining father joining the party come on i've been waiting to come on with you guys and i want i' sure even when to come on

Speaker: Bradley, why didn't that come on earlier, bro? You've been so good lately. And you know i'm you know i'm the I'm the first one to put you in your place. I'm the first one to drag your ass. Hang on, hang on, hang on real quick, real quick. Don't bullshit me.

Speaker: Real quick, Robert, have a good night, man. He's been active in the chat all night and shit, man. so you Have a good night, brother. I love you, brother. Have a good night. i appreciate you, man. I need to get you, you need to get up on this panel on one night with us. so You know I love you, man. Cheers to you.

Speaker: ah Cheers. Later, bro. I was looking for you guys, and at first you guys weren't an open panel, so I couldn't join. And then I did a carry-off. It's been an open panel all night, dude.

Speaker: i one I don't know. When it first came out... Don't give that shit. I'm not saying. Go back and try to find it. but then jeni more so Go back find and brit brittany was sad cause you weren't up here man There was a karaoke show. I do a karaoke show with my friends, so I was doing that for a while.

Speaker: you was see yeah So that's the reason. yeah yeah Sing me a fucking song, Puppet. Sing me a song, Puppet. Dance, monkey dance. Sing me a song.

Speaker: um I just want to say I will sing you a song but can I can i apologize i just want to apologize last time I was on I was very drunk which I am right now but I still wanted to apologize for being too drunk kicking the fuck out say yeah hold on your song last week was pretty good Hold on second. Can you guys enlighten me on what happened? Because I haven't been here for the last couple weeks. before i drag I don't know what he's talking about, man. He got drunk. He's been good. Here, I cleared up. He's been good. He's been fun. He's been funny.

Speaker: He got drunk and he started bringing out the chicken props and shit again, man. Oh, damn. We did a couple of times. We asked him to. We asked him to. No problem. But no. I mean, he fucking did karaoke and he fucking sang and played guitar or whatever it was and it was actually fucking really good.

Speaker: and No, I wasn't good. I was really And I didn't do anything bad. I'm just saying I was i was too drunk. yeah Okay, well, I had to, i had to because i know a lot of I know everybody's been here, though. I've been off i've been gone the last couple weeks, but before even before I left, Bradley, you've been good. You've been good, man.

Speaker: yeah you got you got I didn't anything bad, but I was great. I just wanted to make sure I brought you up tonight, and I wanted to make sure, like, Something didn't happen, so that's why I asked the panel.

Speaker: I don't think anything happened. I was the only one here. I wasn't inappropriate. I was okay. But I still want to say was too drunk and I apologize for that. Get the fuck over it. Don't be that way next time. There's no apologizing for being too drunk on panels. That was a fucking lazy Jedi and Shaman show. It was fucking intoxicated.

Speaker: did i in so show was getting toatedated right right Do you know Elsie? I mean, have you seen one of his shows?

Speaker: Right, Scotto? How drunk is too drunk? I got it. I'm sober again. Yay, me. Listen. Listen.

Speaker: I love you guys. This is great. i'm so I'm just saying. So what what karaoke show were you on, man? um a Tattooed Angel. I've seen her. okay yeah Oh, I know Tattooed Angel.

Speaker: I've been doing her show for a while, for quite a while, so I felt obligated to be on her show. So what, does she do ah karaoke every Saturday night? Yes, she does, and and sometimes Fridays. the This Friday, she didn't show up. so Well, it's it's been fun hanging out with you, Glick. I'm going to miss you, man.

Speaker: He's different for night. He's different.

Speaker: He's contacted his new baby girl. I to say fuck Jedi for disappearing and not even saying bye to anybody. You know what? that ra ke I like mo and i am miss Jedi. Punk ass bitch. Yeah, you did.

Speaker: Mr. Default character. At least you're not like flash blinded right now because he came on camera or whatever. A little retina burn?

Speaker: Yeah, little bit. Rub some dirt on me, it'll be okay. A little duct tape. I like that. ah that's nice to know yeah if ifs If it moves and it's not supposed to, if it's supposed to move and it doesn't, WD-4. There you go. yeah There you go.

Speaker: If it I can duct tape as it ties. Handyman's secret weapon. don't

Speaker: ah johnny Johnny, what anime are you drawing? Are you drawing hentai, man? What are you I am drawing Bujin and Rajin from Shinto Buddhism.

Speaker: Wow. nice Nice. You're always you're always on something Japanese, aren't you? Yeah, that's been my latest study here for the past year. Yeah.

Speaker: That's cool. I've seen people on the back of it in a Twitter for like a year and a half. Hmm? yeah you I said your work's impressive, man. yeah I appreciate that because I'm still getting the line work and style of it down.

Speaker: yeah I haven't seen it. kind Is there any way for me to see it? yeah like to see it I have unfinished pieces that are taking me like up to a year to get done.

Speaker: I don't want to see anything you don't want to show. and You just finished it together, Johnny Bones, because I got arms and stuff that need to be finished. Arms?

Speaker: Johnny's over here Lolly fucking around. That piece is going to take me a fucking while. That shit's photorealistic. I'm trying to get Johnny to stop fucking lollygagging around so he can start tattooing. The hard part is getting the veins right.

Speaker: so Is there duct tape on your head? Is there duct tape on your hand? Maybe. The handyman secret weapon duct tape. So, these are practices. When I say practices, I mean i have different mouths done.

Speaker: i have different limbs done. i have... Trying to practice proportions on mid-section. Click, that's your ball sack. Yeah, that looked like a ball sack. What did you pose for that? I have i have like bits and pieces of stuff getting done. alltogether where' Where's that one of you? It was like almost full page. It was like all different colors and shit.

Speaker: Oh, that was fucking gorgeous. You know what I'm talking about? With the reds and whatever else? Yeah, it was like reds and blues and purples. And I'll get back to y'all on that one. Yeah, that one was cool as hell.

Speaker: Fidel Balms over here.

Speaker: Speaking of, I want him to stop but fucking lolly dicking around and and and get ready to tattoo because I would love for Johnny to start tattooing me.

Speaker: Hmm. Like finishing out my arms, doing my doing my chest, doing my back. like I want Johnny to do it, but he's... You still got those hands on your back, right? here ad juive thing They're on my shoulders, first and foremost.

Speaker: it's It's a blueprint. Place hands here. Right across my neck. For when you go to prison shit. and then and then there's for when you go to prison and shit Or do I go oh and go to the Marine base?

Speaker: are There you yeah Both work. i'm yeah and arrow and I have an arrow on my belly that says your favorite crown right here. It points down to my dick.

Speaker: And it's tattooed all purple and shit. yeah i like jedi said The reason why he left is because the AirPods died. Which is funny because can't score every fucking time I see him playing a life show. So the reason Jedi left is because he's a bitch.

Speaker: Yeah, whatever, Jedi. His AirPods died, but he always has the fucking old ones that connect to the phone. don't know how they died, but here we are. So he wanted to let you guys know that's why he's not here.

Speaker: Speaking of language, Angel just dropping all the tea, man. Jedi's a bitch. I'm too wasted. I'm getting out of here too. so Have a good night, you guys. have come here bradley ah fucking dare you. anywhere. not going anywhere. a you're not going and all right bread and all seriousness when's the last time you were on a panel and

Speaker: people were begging you not to leave Never. Ever. ah Also, Bradley, the only person that's begging you not to leave is me. So... Never. It's never. I don't know any time. Cliff's just trying to get the watch hours up, man.

Speaker: You ever see that scene in Wayne's World? I'm going. Good, man. Go. I'm going. The guy who was like, I'm not going to get drunk tonight. I'm going to behave myself.

Speaker: As I'm getting ready to order more beer. That's why he wants him to stay. It's because they got the same fucking brainwaves. Then he was threatening to beat the door dash driver's ass if he get there with the next six minutes or some shit.

Speaker: I'm fucked up. This motherfucker's got six minutes get my goddamn beer here. hi Bradley, honey, if you need to leave, you can go ahead and leave. so i might don't want to like oh you got to go If you go man, it's all good. you leave, but don't feel like don't feel like you are not welcomed here as sorry you like and fuck up very cool i understand They don't ever feel like that.

Speaker: No. yeah Hold my beer. I'm welcome. and he got better. And he's been a great guest. He redeemed himself. He redeemed himself.

Speaker: and then he came back and he got better and he's been a great book and he's been a great guest or he redeemed himself yeah he love that again Thank you so Yeah, Bradley, you're due you're due for a good fuck up, man.

Speaker: Don't go. At the end of the day, I have the only thing to say. I am getting too drunk. I just want to say thank you so much, and you guys have a good night.

Speaker: Take care, man. Later, Tater.

Speaker: yeah later light or tighter <unk> Thank God that motherfucker left. No, I'm joking.

Speaker: I'm joking, Bradley. We're stuck with fucking Bradley's fucking mongoloid special needs brother. You? We know. No, Haas. Hey, damn.

Speaker: Haas, are you a mongoloid? No, I'm not no fucking mongoloid. Well, that's good. Haas is like, I like french fries on titers. Johnny, did you get distracted, man?

Speaker: Or did you find the other one? ah yeah I've got a heap of fucking papers sitting around here. It's all good. Don't worry about it, man. It's all good. All the last finals that I'm working on tonight, so I should be able to show you all when they get done. I don't want you sicking your regime on me or anything, man. yeah but Hell no.

Speaker: Hey, Glick. Sometimes. Glick's busy sexting. I'm not going to have face mask. Put me in the front part so they can see your fucking mug.

Speaker: oh What? what I ain't showing my face. Put me in the front above the fucking time whatever else so nothing fucking blocks your face. I mean, I get that for us because we're on the panel.

Speaker: There you go. Like that? Nobody wants to see my face. I'm trying That is true. it your fucking dick, Blake. Yeah. don't say it Don't say the quiet words out loud, Lick.

Speaker: Titties! no no no no No, no, no, no, no. I'm trying to... Uh-huh. Yeah, we know what you're trying to do.

Speaker: I'm trying to order fucking beat on DoorDash. See? See? Oh, God. Motherfucker's got six minutes. Six fucking minutes. Apparently, we're going for an after party, you guys.

Speaker: No, we're not doing an after party, but... no i know i Yeah, totally. Totally.

Speaker: See, John's on board. Let's go. After party. One more, or, 50 more minutes. After party. Angel, fuck are you talking about? You just got here like 32 minutes ago, man. Shut up. I was here in the beginning, motherfucker.

Speaker: And I left because my booty cell fucking called. Oh, we got your booty called. Yeah, she left because her phone died. She had to make it to those cheeks clapped and shit, man. I got talking to my ex. got talking to my ex.

Speaker: your ex yeah i'm gonna sleep with somebody i don't fucking know i'll probably do it next time i didn't do it this time hey rex said i didn't do it this time i got a song for that random fucking bro like i don't do anything you mean you have a life outside of youtube what hey what but no Nowadays, people could be like somebody else I fucking know that has got somebody new on their fucking dick in fucking two weeks.

Speaker: Y'all, y'all, y'all, y'all, y'all

Speaker: um and concerned about you on click like like come on come like like you get new girlfriends like prostitutes good s scabs come on me see i don't want to know that I'm just happy I'm on top of a round of applause tonight. That's good got it. Don't get too mad. Don't

Speaker: Keep it going. Nah, started asking what that all about, but in never mind. Hopefully this one probably works out. is really fucking pretty. Who? Who?

Speaker: Oh, let's see her. Let's see picture. Since she's not up here. won't care. She won't care. Baby, are you still watching? Are you still awake? She's question. Blonde. a guys baby don she she won't care she won't care baby are you still watching are you still awake ah he like some she's lurking um ah one question <unk> Come on, madam. Tell him it's okay.

Speaker: What's that? Tell him he's a good boy. yeah Well, first and foremost, she's local. Second of all, we've been talking for a hot-ass minute. She's local. We've been talking for a hot-ass minute. oh and in in I'm sorry that you guys fell into the wormhole of the whole Brandy situation. No, no, no.

Speaker: Hold on a second. and and a hol I'm sorry you guys fell into that, but there a method to madness. We got that. No, no, no, no, no. was there was a method to my madness we were push in your good we got that no no no no no no no no no No, no. I love when a motherfucker tries to make it sound like he had a plan and shit. No, no, no. know I really did. I really did. And I don't know I'm drinking right now and and and whatnot.

Speaker: I know you guys want to hear because we're all drinking right now. said But at the of the day... Hey, motherfucker. I haven't cut the sip. I mean, at the end of the day, I really did. And you know what? And you know what?

Speaker: Stupid bitch sent me like $1,000. And now her little five foot something ass husband little cuck bastard can't get his little two inch dick up unless some other dude is fucking her is going on all my social media on all my social media and trying to be like when you go send that one let me let me let me jump in as your friend let me jump in as your friend shut up you don't need to share everything on the internet

Speaker: I don't mind sharing that shit. I don't mind sharing that shit because i never asked her for money. That stupid ass tried to send me money. and And then I understood why i only got pictures from here up because that bitch is built like a fucking NFL lineman.

Speaker: I don't know why that was so fucking funny. That's a bitch. Bitch plays for my Browns, god damn it. I made a thousand bucks.

Speaker: I got a thousand dollars out of it. That was good. was like a little bit Yeah, I looked a little bit stupid. I almost made a thousand dollars. I looked a little bit stupid. oh Well, Kayla's in the chat. She said she's here, but don't do anything got to go get another beer.

Speaker: So hang on. that one There's no pause on this game. There's pause. There's no pause on this game. there's no power sp gorgeous no pause on this game yeah Yeah. You fucking. Yeah. no i that that that That whole situation. i was it is you know I'm okay with that.

Speaker: and no fucking cross country bullshit and boom but yeah no no there says limb me there psycho there baby there's my baby right i won't call i won't call you by name I won't call you by name again.

Speaker: yeah She don't know. You can't pronounce now we No. We've been talking. we We talked for a little minute. and Then we met. and She threw me right into the fire with her family.

Speaker: and we meet we She's Her family likes So far, her family likes me. um And, you know, we will they say that. where yeah did Did I come back to you saying her family likes you?

Speaker: Dude, what are you doing? fucking dayton What are you doing? Dating retards, man. Stop it. yeah I'm joking. I'm joking, Kayla. Her family likes retards. So here we are.

Speaker: yeah Maybe it's because maybe maybe they're really nice. Her family's really nice. Now. No, no. She took me right into the fire. No, we talked for a little bit. Yeah, no, we talked for a little bit.

Speaker: And then we met, we hung out, and we spent the last week together. And no, she's local. As I said, she's local. And

Speaker: She loves what I do here I don't know why but she loves this Network see if you can show her pictures so they can see her I mean no She's in the comments That's her picture There you go And we're friends on Facebook Angel So you can go No I did that's why I said she's fucking gorgeous I know she is One of my very good friends Is like dude No disrespect, but how much chloroform is it taking for you to keep this girl? I see her and I see you.

Speaker: Apparently apparently that's what it was, being Browns fan.

Speaker: Yo, Johnny. yeah Remember when I had cornrows? Yeah. Nobody cares. Right? right Hey!

Speaker: There's my Scotto. There he is. There's my Scotto. There's my Scotto. Love him. Hold on, Scotto. You gotta show her your nails.

Speaker: Oh, did you get them done again? Are you missing the nails again? Those fucking pearls right there. Those fucking pearls. Yes. Oh, well done, Scotto. Hell yeah. Hell yeah.

Speaker: like yeah but we do Is that

Speaker: is that a Piggly Wiggly t-shirt? Yes, it sure is, sir. okay Okay. That's my beautiful scotto. I grew up in another town that the next town over to this day is still a Piggly Wiggly. So whenever I go visit home, I go to the Piggly Wiggly.

Speaker: I don't know if there's still one in town, but one, yeah, we used to have one grown up. Yeah. It was like a food line or something like that. Yeah. More or less. Pressure store. ah A little bit of everything.

Speaker: Yeah, with Piggly Wiggly's down in South Carolina and shit. Skydo wants a Piggly Wiggly. No, he's already got one. Wait a minute.

Speaker: I can get Piggly. Oh, I'm sure you can. I do not doubt you. Well,

Speaker: I'm slightly disappointed. It's only 1230 and I can't order no more beer. and I'll see. ya was going to fucking sing a song. Oh, do it. Do it. Go ahead, Rick. Go ahead, Rick.

Speaker: Serenade. Glick's over there sexting with Kay Lacton like he's trying to order beer on Uber. I want more fucking beer. This fucking beer gave me a headache tonight.

Speaker: I'm about to order a fucking pizza just so I can get more fucking beer. hi Yeah, I'd like a small personal pan pizza and 36 beers, please.

Speaker: Right? Holy shit. Oh, they're closed. That fucking door is. Man, I don't know about, is it like just shit around you? Like, ever since fucking COVID, restaurants that used to be open until like, you midnight, 1 a.m. around here, everything closes at like fucking 9 o'clock anymore, man. Yeah. The only thing, the only thing over 9 o'clock is like Burger King until like midnight and fucking McDonald's until like 1 a.m. Yeah, Wendy's and McDonald's here. And Wendy's, yeah, yeah. That's it. That's it. All the other restaurants are like, fuck y'all.

Speaker: COVID happened. We ain't staying open past fucking 8 o'clock. inre now here I don't want to fucking drive 30 minutes to fucking end now. Alright, so it's not just me. right Yeah, if you sneeze or some shit, they come splinter the whole area with bleach or whatever. Yeah, fuck them bitches. Alright,

Speaker: right well, I guess I feel a little bit better knowing it's not just me. it's not really i'm I'm really like kind of fucking fuck her, I always... Scotto, what'd you do? How the fuck can you not get one beer? snuck so from there He said his butt hurt.

Speaker: always I always order beer on DoorDash, and now all of a sudden it's like... It's just got him stuttering, man. And I can't. I was like a fucking meth head going through with your house.

Speaker: Right. I can click the button, and it was like, cheats.

Speaker: What, like there's nobody on? Nobody available? that the problem? I don't know. I've never used DoorDash or Uber Eats or of that shit. It says no items available. Can I order cigarettes? I can order fucking cigarettes.

Speaker: Well, they don't deliver where I live. They're like, dude, you order a case a fucking day. We're out.

Speaker: No, I don't. Can we please replenish our fucking stock?

Speaker: I... yeah shouldbye wait home Hold up, hold up, check your shit, because DoorDash has been talking up lately. I remember the night or the other morning at work, and went to the next town over, not mine.

Speaker: It's like 45 minutes. Oh, shit, oh, shit, oh, shit, you know what, you're right. You're right. I forgot like I shared DoorDash with people. Angel's on it, man.

Speaker: Yeah, my was 45 minutes late. which i mean no You get a booty call, man. It it gives like the brain clarity and shit, man. No, it's on me. yeah no it's Your beer is on route.

Speaker: Hold your horses, man.

Speaker: This ain't Budweiser. We don't deliver by Clydesdale. I wish I did. Can I ask a personal question? like yeah boy yeah sure since Since you guys are obviously a couple and you've made it public, is there a reason Kayla doesn't come up on panel with you?

Speaker: um

Speaker: yeah and She knows we're all going to invite her in and in love on her and shit. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Well, I mean... It's us. Just say it. It's us. She's got her thing.

Speaker: for for for ah For obvious reasons. um

Speaker: But also it's kind of like. Okay, there's law involved. Never mind. There's no law involved. Like I'm like.

Speaker: um's sorry good I will make it be known that I'm in a relationship and I have no problem letting it be known who I'm in a relationship with. But. but never she wants to come if she If she wants to come up with, if she wants to come up here or she's if she's here or I'm there and she wants to pop on screen, she's welcome to, but I'm not going to push it. I'm not going to push it.

Speaker: Well, yeah, wasn't trying to push it. I was just asking the question. And it's all personal shit, man. You don't have to explain it. This is new territory for me because this is um

Speaker: is new territory for me because This one's sorry. This is the first relationship that I've been in since my ex-wife and I split up.

Speaker: That was local-ish. hey

Speaker: Yeah, everybody I've been with has been long distance. Oh, lovely. Okay, yeah. She's about an hour from me. It's all good. You guys ain't ready to do it. That's all you had to say, man. I wasn't trying to pry. i was just curious.

Speaker: But no, she she wait she loves ah she loves what she does here or what we do here. um Even before we met, she was already checking out the podcast and she loves what we do and she loves the panels we have on Saturdays and and and and and the other shows and stuff like that.

Speaker: And Typically, I'm the first one to be like, yeah, who's the podcast? You guys should check it out. And and I've met some of her family. I'm going to meet more of her family next weekend.

Speaker: And she's done told everybody. like she's She's so proud. And she's so eager to tell people about what I do with the podcast and and about group.

Speaker: like our our our our group And it makes me feel good. So she's first. bringing She's one of the first people who's ever been like that. And so. That's a good thing. ne man Cheers to you guys. Yeah.

Speaker: Yeah. Cheers. and And somehow you convinced her you're famous. How'd you do that? yeah yeah always living that your sacred yeah tell me amazing she me watched if She watched last weekend's podcast rock.

Speaker: She really just found a quick She was like, you lost your tan, baby. Last I told her, I said, hey, this is my this is my little brother.

Speaker: And I was like, I know you're probably not going to see the family resemblance, but this is my little brother and we're basically identical. And I pulled up the stream and she was like,

Speaker: I totally see it. You guys are identical. You guys could basically be twins. I was like, yep. She's a goddamn keeper. yeah

Speaker: now I wasn't trying to get personal. matt well nice aspect of it Not to be mean, but what type of tism does she have? What kind of what? Tism.

Speaker: She's a little special. ah she's a little special Well, mean, she's dating you, so... It was kind of assumed, man.

Speaker: We're happy for you. We're happy for you. I don't know who's taking advantage of you. nice to kind of meet you, Kayla. Welcome to the fucked up family. That's what mean. I have a feeling... i have a feeling... i ready the fact that she got in the comments tonight speaks volumes.

Speaker: I have a feeling she'll be popping... on camera, whether with me or maybe, possibly in the panel the before any of us expect it.

Speaker: No. So, what you're saying is no more lonely fucking TikTok nights? Yeah. I mean, she encourages... Dude, I gotta follow you on TikTok.

Speaker: I hear all these like ill hear all this shit about you on TikTok. I need to follow you on TikTok. I mean, shout out to her. i God love her. God love her because I was like,

Speaker: She hadn't seen my TikTok, and I was like, I do thirst traps from time to time. I'm talking about your live ones. You're a fucking live one. She was like, you do thirst traps? And I was like, yeah.

Speaker: Wait, you go live on third on TikTok? He does. yeah yeah nothing He Give me a give me your shit so give me your shit in private chat, man, follow it's glick time likeck underscore talk two point um Yeah, I'm always getting my for that. I'm like, dude, let's go to this show. let's go this one Let's go to this one. i do funny So we were laying in bed the other night, and I was like, I of do thirst stress on TikTok from time to time. And she was like, let me see. And she hadn't even seen my TikTok.

Speaker: Like, we're both on TikTok, and and and and and and she hadn't seen my TikTok yet. And I showed her, and she was like, And she was like, could send you photos.

Speaker: I screen trust everything. Yeah, she was like, damn. and and and and i made And I made a joke that I was going to go buy a screen mask and I wanted to do a thirst trap. This is before her and I started talking and stuff like that.

Speaker: And she was like, ah yeah, you need to do that. You need to go. You need to go. buy the scream mask and do whatever thirst trap you were thinking about doing. She's one, man. I like her. I like her. She encourages my bullshit. She's like, you got to get the followers. You got to get the likes. You got to get the views. i mean shes she doesn't you feel at home She encourages that now.

Speaker: she won she right now she does so she does tiktok shop she's got enough followers she has tiktoks shop and She can promote stuff and push stuff.

Speaker: and and and Now, granted, like I told her, obviously, if I go buy the screen mask, it might be one or two videos on TikTok. But it translates to whenever you want me it's good to get the screen mask out in real life for you. You know what I mean? A little book talk.

Speaker: book talk yep yeah yes yes little scream talk she won them she won them tiktok gets to see it on tiktok but she gets it in real life and i mean if that's what she wants if i gotta put the screen mask on and and do what i gotta do for her so but basically all your pictures i see on instagram daily are the are the are basically the screenshots from your tiktok mean do you Wait a minute which instagram Which Instagram do you follow?

Speaker: I don't know Whichever one you gave me months back I didn i gave you the nonsensical nonsense Well that then that that's the one I'm seeing The one where you're like Good morning It's a great day to be a good day All your positive Bullshit yeah Yes. yes wellll well we'll We'll go with that. Apparently I don't have the good one. no you know but yeah It's all good because I'm not really on that that fucker that much. so that's all i mean ah You don't want to be on the good.

Speaker: You don't want to be on that. baby Who does the bitch have to suck off to get some fucking links over here? the hell?

Speaker: and Scott O Glick underscore talk 2.0 and then send me a message on there and I'll send you my Instagram link.

Speaker: But Ma, I don't wanna. And I'll send you my OnlyFans link if you want it. No, no, definitely not. When you get a message from that's Just got to say hi My nickname is White Flight. Thank you. White Flight.

Speaker: Speaking of OnlyFans and my she is 100% on board with me because apparently I have a nice voice.

Speaker: I do not want to hear about you and fucking OnlyFans. Apparently I have a voice and I don't see it and don't understand it. But a lot of women have asked for me to do an OnlyVans where I'm reading the BookTok books.

Speaker: And I was telling her about it. I have a very ASMR voice. And she was like, oh, my God. Because she reads those. She's she's fully engulfed in those. And she was like, oh, my God, you have to do it. You have to do it.

Speaker: And I'm like, you have to send me books and chapters. Like, you have to send me the animation. Dude, have her read the dark series. I want to hear you making your own shit up, man. Modog has a voice for it. Lick, not you.

Speaker: No offense. Well, we'll use your video and my voice. You can just lip sync it. angel yeah i mean Angel just looks for every reason to shit on me. man you nine Not drunk. Not drunk. Not drunk. No, I don't agree with you, Angel.

Speaker: Not a drunk. league But yes, apparently I do have the voice

Speaker: No, because it's got a high pitch out there at the end of everything you say. It looks like I rode up on my stallion. I licked my finger. I turned the page. There you go. Jersey, take your man.

Speaker: Jersey, come back. Yeah, she done crashed. well

Speaker: God damn it. Well, I'm going to have send you a fucking link and be like, nah, fuck it. I don't want to see your shit, dude. I don't want to see you after being all fucking... that just terrified what you wish i only i't only do I'm good. i'll see I'll see you here on Saturday nights and hang out with you, man. I don't only do 30 steps on TikTok.

Speaker: Send me her fucking TikTok thing I can follow her, please. And I'll tell her about the fucking books that I read. Oh, wait. I'll take Kayla's. I'll take Kayla's. That's what saying. I'm joking.

Speaker: Send me her fucking links for TikTok. I'll follow her. And I'll write her about the fucking books that I read. And trust me, she's going to fucking love them. Wait, can I ask a stupid question? And this is going make me sound stupid. no I have no question stupid. Is BookTok really? is Is that a real thing?

Speaker: I obviously don't get on TikTok. We discussed this a while back. Dude, I was kind of drunk that night. I literally was... My son and I were at Spirit Halloween today. It's all like dirty book shit? Like erotic novels? It's a real thing. I literally... My son and I were at Spirit Halloween today.

Speaker: and I had ah the new scream mask, scream mask. I know you know I'm talking about, Angel. And I had it on, and I took a picture of it, and I sent it, and I sent it to Kayla, and she was like, oh, yeah. That's why last night on the live stream, I fucking blazed the mic and were talking about it.

Speaker: And about minutes left, was like, the characters, but the scream mask is the thing. And they're like, wait, what? So I was like, don't talk about a scream mask. I told her, I said, I'm going down there Friday when I get off work.

Speaker: And now we're still doing the show next Saturday. She made it very clear. She made it very clear that we're still going to the show Saturday. She's like, you can do it from the back porch, wherever, blah, blah, blah.

Speaker: So we're still doing the show next Saturday. But I was like, apparently I have to buy this mask and yeah bring it with me next weekend. Do do i need to buy a screen mask and start a TikTok page or some shit? i mean yeah I'm an unemployed broke motherfucker over here. yeah Bullshit. My TikTok page is not all thirst traps. I do all kinds of shit.

Speaker: He does really does. ah

Speaker: Oh, my God. oh my God. Did you get a beer? Oh, my God. Oh, my God. You got your beer? No. Skylar just followed me on TikTok. Well, congratulations.

Speaker: welcome congratulations Motherfucker hung monkey is me, bitch. I told you that. No! My Scott will follow me. My sweet will follow me. Oh, God. Here we go again.

Speaker: Scott will follow me. It just went fucking full gay on us again, man. Don't fucking judge me, of bitches. You know what two people got following me is my husband and fucking Glick. We don't. we don't we Hold on a damn second, Angel.

Speaker: Oh, no. You got you. I made the new account. Yeah, because the end of that provocative shit on there. can let my town see me doing that stuff. Oh, I don't give a fuck who sees me doing provocative shit. Y'all some like little side fucking freaky deaky motherfuckers up in here. So here we are.

Speaker: I know. Yeah, I know you know. You got the video. Of you in the shower? no why Doesn't matter. doesn't matter She's like carry fuck on on. Moving on. want Hoss' It was it was one hundred percent ticktokck approved and know hoss i but as naked talking like doing some of them in before everybody else before anybody else when you' single single

Speaker: and we know for a while awesome awesome Also, single, single, but before anybody gets any crazy-ass ideas... Too late. Too late. Too late.

Speaker: It was not... Like, it was... She was like, you think this is TikTok approved? Too late. And I was like, yeah. Because she didn't show anything.

Speaker: Oh, she was just looking... Okay. You fucking whore. Not much, but some cleavage went up. So it was decent.

Speaker: I need to run this by a male friend to see if it's okay. It was a good TikTok thirst trap, it wasn't like... It wasn't like... It wasn't like... It wasn't like some full-on crazy video. It was just like, TikTok's in a blog. I'm like, no, that's cool. He can't tell me. He's like, you make videos. don't know what the fuck do. He's like, just do whatever. like...

Speaker: right We're talking. and fucking We're flirting and everything else. Here we go. I'll make this video. yeah was good tom was going to let to I'm just going to let Glic's little thirst trap shit just live free in my head.

Speaker: I'm not going to follow you. I'm just going to make shit up. because no know I know my imagination. i'll be like I doubt One, two, you know exact yeah first but i think literally so afterter one to Oh, what do you do? Like fucking cooking videos and gardening and shit? Shut the fuck up, dude. There's like five or six videos before have omelet. Let show you how I make the omelet for my sweetheart in the morning. Click's like, I don't just do thirst traps. I got two gardening videos and one of me like shopping at Walmart. But I got 168 thirst traps out there.

Speaker: yeah No, it's not even that bad. it' no it's I'm just fucking with it. It's not even like that because because I told Gaila the other night, like, yeah, you know, I've done some thirst traps. And she's like, oh, yeah, let me see.

Speaker: So I had to go to my TikTok page. And I had to literally scroll to find the thirst traps. Fair enough. I don't know. Also, I'm fucking dealing. I never work. Stop. Stop.

Speaker: It's always you. It's always you. and never worked because like me laugh fucking yeah sorry even mean it's always you andology you I can go that all the time. I only have two friends on there. You and my ex-husband.

Speaker: So here we are. Why are you why are you on my sweet page? And one of those was a booty call tonight. So just saying. Yeah. I'll be here next week. I'll be here next week. I'll be here next week. boun ca about and dad dad didn't dance but pen my husband and I ain't had sex with my ex-fucking wife.

Speaker: You can't trust where she's fucking been. I can trust my husband. He's big truck driver. And he can fuck with nobody else. Fucking crackhead motherfuckers. So yeah. yeah no truck Truck drivers are never around fucking lot lizards and shit. They that yeah each other shit down. on top of that,

Speaker: fuck We were on the phone pretty much 24-7. They shut that shit down. or yeah They shut down pussy on the road. Shut up, woman. What are you talking about? They did. They shut that shit down. They got to fucking crack that shit. Him and I on the phone all the time.

Speaker: You got to look for that shit. wow and Angel, I'm just fucking with you. You know that, right? I know you are because you're also a Marine just like him. i'm just well it's there lotley Oh, he's a Marine? Oh, he's definitely getting fucked out on the road.

Speaker: He's a Marine and a fucking Army. Alright, Marine and Army. You did both fucking two bands.

Speaker: The Sarge? are you talking about Sarge? she's talking about mag Keep up, Rex. God damn it. Keep up and get the fuck out of here.

Speaker: Speak up. I'm a little deaf in my left ear. Motherfucking.

Speaker: okay here's Here's the important question. Click. Did you get your beer ordered?

Speaker: I literally have a half hour no items are available. but my know i literally have a half hour and it says no items are available So what's that mean? Since I don't use the app and I don't do that shit. What does not what does there are no items available? what look beer What's that mean? I don't know. This is the first time I've this is this is on Well, it probably means there's no... Can have fucking door dash you fucking beer?

Speaker: No, i have split the mails and see yeah yeah I can... I can literally door dash. like I can get a fucking Mountain Dew. I mean, obviously, that does not mean the fucking store is out of beer, right?

Speaker: yeah Yeah, no. They shouldn't be out of here. Just no drivers available? Is that what that means? well Unless Glick drank it all. No. Because I can still order anything else.

Speaker: Jedi. Jedi backstage. Backstage. yeah i is backstage

Speaker: backstage ah

Speaker: He ate him some pig brains and charged up his ear pods or iPods or whatever. Pig brains and pickled pigs. yeah Have you ever had pickled pigs? What's up, Jedi, you lazy fucking whore?

Speaker: Hey, I can't see. Wait a minute. Let my eyes adjust. Cheers, y'all. I'm going to start reading books on BookTok or whatever the fuck that is. Yes, do it. I'm going to have to check that shit out. I'm fine.

Speaker: but moag you were there jersey i talking about um She's in all of that too. Let's go.

Speaker: He wants to think that was water. It's a big fucking glass of gin. I can read some dirty shit, man. I'm just saying. I mean, you know, you got to know when to hold them and know when to fold.

Speaker: I'm just saying. Not how my first story would start. Just saying. I'm doing okay, Jim. Chet, we've been talking about you, man. Your ear's been burning. no i put some cream on them i put some cream on them wow are you you're that white and do not have the i'm i'm disappointed i i assumed jed could like talk to aliens and yeah i can you can i just block out all your bullshit i can hear yeah he's lazy he's just fucking lazy to deal with the shit

Speaker: they've They've been wanting to come down for the last 35 fucking years save the planet and shit. He's ignoring it. No, I've been warning them against us. I'm like, no. Yeah, fair enough. Just watch. Just watch and see what happens. Go back. the information You don't want to come down here.

Speaker: Good man. Yeah, keep your distance and just watch. Yeah, you'll see what happens. Yeah, just watch the shit show. what was the opposite you said ah something sith instead of lazy it was going to be what excited extra motivated sith motivate motivat there you go motivated see i i like that i like that most of the time i'm a lazy jedi i turn into a motivated seth and you don't want that when we see you you're mostly just lazy jedi yeah i'm lazy jetdi na i'd love to see you pissed off yelling at an employee one time

Speaker: ah That would be funny. Don't pick on my boy. It's not funny. ah It's it pretty fucking hectic. Don't pick on my boy. no i'm I'm actually pretty laid back.

Speaker: That's my boy. Don't pick on him. i I'm saying i would ah just the opposite of picking on him. I would love to see it happen. That's not picking on him. Seriously, yeah. yeah Hey, you'd be pissed off and going around like the Tasmanian Jedi and shit.

Speaker: I'd see him just storming into a fucking you know conference room and shit, banging both hands down on a fucking table. Listen up, motherfuckers! You can't handle the truth. Yeah.

Speaker: And Sergeant may be just sitting there fucking crying. We're laughing so hard. Like, shut up. Get on a fucking podcast, bitch. I can't breathe. Pleasure alone. You talk good, but don't talk shit. Good night. Pleasure alone.

Speaker: Jedi knows I love him like a brother man he knows that oh yeah Modog's my dude mean I'd fuck him like a sister but I love him like my brother I'm from the north honky we don't do that up here here's you're over there you're out get out west man you're out west yeah northway I mean talk about saying the quiet part out loud damn it Sarge I know I fucked up the beer's kicking in man unlike Glick I have beer I got beer the store is not empty where fucking Modog's from yeah it's called my fridge I got four hours I need more beer hey I got five I've been drinking since six o'clock this morning you've been what drinking since six o'clock this morning yeah there are programs you can get into to help with that you know that right

Speaker: No, I drank so much I fucking got sober again. Jesus Christ, girl. She drank herself sober. like I had nobody talk to. Nobody to talk to. of my fucking kids. She's like, Glick wasn't on the thirst trap fucking thing today. I didn't have anything to I wanted to talk to him on there.

Speaker: But no, fucking, I woke up this morning. i came out, let dogs out, and the big girls. I fucking slid the puppy stuff whatever else for the little dogs. I fucking fed the old ass cat that can't eat dry food. She can. She just don't fucking want to.

Speaker: Did you feed her some pig brains? No, fuck no. Whatever the fuck is in the can. I don't know. I came outside and I went back in. My son's getting ready for work. i'm like, bro, what are you doing? He's like, I'll get work. I'll work soon.

Speaker: I was like, huh? I think we're from 11 to 10 or 5 to 11. He's like, do. And I'm late. you're not. and i'm late ah no you're not he there he was like, you said it's like couple months till 8. I need to be it early.

Speaker: I was like, and he went in bathroom, came back out. I'm bucking for that promotion, mom. okay I was like, but I was like, look, was like, where are you going? He's like, to work.

Speaker: I'm dressed. I was like, he's like, wait. was like, honey, you don't work till tonight. He's like, wait, it's 8 a.m. I got another can of pork brains right here. Shush. He's like, it's 8 a.m. I'm telling the story, motherfucker.

Speaker: Motherfucker. he's like it's aim p.m i was like it's a.m m he's like oh and he he sat there and got fucked up because he thought i went to work this morning which saturday's in my day off and he thought i came home and went to bed and woke up a nap and he was late to fucking work so he got up and fucking got dressed and everything ready to go work was like honey you know worked for five I've done that shit on a Saturday before, man. I forgot it was Saturday. I've done it too. Woke up 5.30, got a shower, blah, blah, blah. Be the only motherfucker sitting work pissed off because none of my fucking employees were there.

Speaker: Like, what the fuck? um you alllthough Then my wife texts me like, yeah where are you at? I'm like, fuck. You know Saturday, right? I don't know. I would drop the kids at the fucking bus stop. I go back home. I take a nap for a bros back in the day.

Speaker: I fucking wake back up. i'm like, fuck. You know what that means? take the kids to work. Yeah. You got over on the Friday night and lost the whole weekend. But you thought it was. Yeah, you thought it was over stress.

Speaker: yeah I slept all weekend. No, you didn't. i will work I woke up on a Saturday and panicked and started to get ready and then realized it was Saturday. I've never actually made it into work. not know Oh, yeah. you yeah fucking I'll watch cartoons in my workplace. yeah buts yeah um'm um I've been that dick dad once or twice in my life, man. like My kids got it but it thought it was like school day and I'd let them like get dressed. Literally, because the school was only a five-minute walk from our house and shit.

Speaker: i is cross street and I'd be sitting out on the porch drinking a cup of coffee and shit and they'd be like, come back looking at me like, you fucking asshole. yeah Jedi, without getting too personal, what do you do, man? What's what's your line of work?

Speaker: I work in manufacturing. sure I'm not going to say what I make. Should I work somewhere house? No, no, no. was just I was just curious what you did. It's too easy to guess where I would work if I told you got you. I'm getting ready swatch your ass right now, man.

Speaker: It's all good. Everybody fucking knows I work in their fucking convenience liquor store.

Speaker: Oh wait, Jedi, I owe you a fuck you because you made me laugh right when I took a bong hit when you said that shit earlier. we went so there No, I choked hard on that.

Speaker: I was like, ugh. What did I do to make you laugh? I don't remember. yo like got something You know, like I'll say something offhand and you'll say something offhand. I don't really remember exactly. but I remember choking on the fucking bong hit. I remember that part. i mean What I heard is we got a choker and we got a spitter. I think Greg chokes on a lot more things. I know when to choke him.

Speaker: Hold on.

Speaker: So Glick, you got nine minutes left. Are you going to let go after six hours? Glick's fading out on us. Glick's fading out on us. I thought he just got more beer.

Speaker: No, I can't get no more beer. Fucking Scott almost spit that shit out. His store is out of beer. I think i dr they saw you come across the order and they're like, no, we got to cut this motherfucker off.

Speaker: You're on the new fucking Utah. Good luck with that. His local liquor store text goes straight to his fucking therapist and shit. He's like, no, no, don't fill that fucking order. Fuck him. yeah um I hope you guys understand that you guys are my therapist. This is my therapy.

Speaker: Well, you're totally fucked, sir. I'm okay with that. That is the official diagnosis. You are fucked. Kayla, we apologize. We are so sorry, Kayla. That girl knows more about me than caleb we apologize like yeah we' so sorry kale that that we not a girl news that girl was more about me than anybody may ever know about me.

Speaker: I already know. Sounds familiar. whatever

Speaker: level yeah No, not bullshit. I'll just like it. with him Awesome. much we un realing We've heard this before.

Speaker: I'll have a purple crayon in here. This is Lord of the Glick. There's three parts to do this. I'm trying to do this right wait oh guy okay good oh um man amazing what did you What did you think you did wrong last time that you're correcting this time?

Speaker: First, he shared his thirst traps. At the end of the day, let's be honest. number two excited know the video break at dream of the day at the end of the day let's be honest Welcome to Glick's house of wayward women where we foster women and until they find their forever home.

Speaker: Glick's house of debauchery. That's it. Glick's halfway house. Also, what I done different? She's so there's that she's local that's why why do you date hey look to me well okay jenna finish your joke i'm sorry sorry sorry no no i was just gonna be serious as much as we're breaking glick over the coals about this shit i'm glad you found somebody make you happy and y'all click together you know what i mean

Speaker: So, I mean, we're breaking you over the coals and we're going to roast your ass for you. And you guys should. that's is that that that's what we do That's how you know we love you, man. We're fucking with you. As much as I love Jersey and Modal, and I know that Jersey and Modal love each other, like, we...

Speaker: break their bowls constantly. And I know Jersey, oh yeah she's going to be mad because Mo Dog and I are going to hang out before they do. debt like God damn it, shut went to bed. She's not Talk about wake up. up and guy we play grow it's it's funny and how you name your network and shit when you sign up for like your new cable company I literally named him on Modog's House of Debauchery.

Speaker: I had everybody in my fucking building like like trying to figure out who the fuck that was because they don't know me by Modog. They'd be asking me. I'm like, oh yeah I don't know who the fuck that is, man, but that motherfucker don't sound right, man. Wait a minute. That's not your government name?

Speaker: No, that's not my government name. is, but the D's not capitalized. not capitalized. Oh, thank you. yeah That's how I hide. i there's yeah There's a five in my name, but it's silent.

Speaker: Is that Exactly. exactly Back on my book talk days, you know.

Speaker: Yeah. That's a fucking a new one on me. I've never heard of that. just well only have Apparently, Click's going to get naked and wear a screen mask and like read erotic novels and shit. He does that every Sunday. Moe Dogg.

Speaker: Is your actual name Bruce? Well, fucking hello, Miss Doxie now. Fuck. What the fuck, man? Whoa. What the fuck? I found you on Facebook. I told you I could a name right now. Blindside.

Speaker: God damn. No, that's not my name. mo dog american its here bru mod dog Is your name Steve Smith? not no you been no it's no that's not me ah um ha ha um ah you and you bruce wayne at one two three m street and your yeah Does your house look like a cave and do you have a black car with wings on the back of it?

Speaker: Do you have an ankle for a butler who is a badass? Do you ever get an urge to punch criminals in the face? Do you stare at the moon when it's full bright and think somebody's shooting a signal your way?

Speaker: Do you have a weird obsession with... with underage boys that you adopted. That could be a lot of weird things.

Speaker: but that could be a lot of things that I'm just saying. agent that watches Sorry nobody know that. you know But...

Speaker: I'll send you the fucking two shot of what I found. Dear FBI agent, if you don't know what we're talking about, read the Batman comic book series. Exactly.

Speaker: He's pulling up all our files right now. It's the same fucking name, bro. It's the same name. I can find anybody except for a shaman. here somema Okay, no, i found two people i let be some every I found two people on different platforms or multiple platforms.

Speaker: Could be shaman, but that's the only one that fucking evades me. I'm gonna find him, I'm gonna find him. I've never met a stalker in a person. i used to fucking do this for living.

Speaker: used to start no I got paid by people to fucking find people and find information on themselves. I don't know if we can be friends. I don't care about you that much. I ain't looking to you.

Speaker: Thanks for listening. Thanks for listening thanks hanging out. Appreciate y'all. Check out Nonsense Nonsense right here on the nonsenical Nonsense Go Nonsense. Jedi, do a fucking after party.

Speaker: Do an after party, Jedi.

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