Transcript
Speaker: Okay, what we need, Britt, is some kind of an intro for Wednesday night show, Hump Day Ha Ha's. What would you do for an intro?
Speaker: Hump Day Ha Ha's? I feel like...
Speaker: i don't know. What would you say to intro the show? What would you say to intro the show?
Speaker: Why are you putting me on the spot while you're recording me too, you motherfucker? I don't know if it's a recording. Just do it. i Tell me the intro of the show. We need an intro for the show, Britt.
Speaker: And go.
Speaker: ah Welcome, everybody.
Speaker: can't do this with just you. Welcome, everybody, to what? ah Welcome, everybody, to Hump Day Ha Ha's. We're here for some laughter and fun times and chillax.
Speaker: Hope everybody's having a great night. Here with Michael and we got Brittany. Let's go. Let's have some fun with some comedy. Boom. I think that might work.
Speaker: I still it's like it. It gets worse every time. I'm so confused on what's happening, to be honest. That's our intro. Okay. Okay. We are live now.
Speaker: oh Oh, are people actually listening to us? Yes, they are. Yes, sir. Yes, sir. Shut the fuck up. So, welcome, everybody. don't say that.
Speaker: You'll say that. yeah yeah I got it. You got it. You got it. Hump day. Ha ha. We're here tonight with Mike.
Speaker: um Yeah, and obviously no Michael. Yeah. Oh my god, you weren't supposed to say anything. Did you not hear the whole fucking gameplay intro? I am literally an asshole, but I use my asshole powers for good instead of evil.
Speaker: yeah I'm sorry. go ahead, Brittany bitch. it's It's over now. Obviously, this isn't Michael, but it is Michael. where It's Mike. but the just I'm Mike. He's Michael.
Speaker: Hi. Welcome to the show. Yeah. Welcome to the show. Right. Right. I like your beard. It's pretty dope.
Speaker: Thank you. You like. Yeah. Thank you. So um you're Canadian, right? Yes, I am. kind of comedy do you pert prefer to do i was gonna ask you that but you beat me to it um it's my show okay i hate bragging i hate bragging but michael brought this up to me some years ago he's like i have a unique brand of storytelling uh
Speaker: Sorry, brain farting. ADHD. I do impressions and I do physical. I blend them all Yeah. So, yeah.
Speaker: Like... I actually do a fucking elbow drop on stage. Oh, WWE up in this bitch.
Speaker: Sort of. Sort of. right Like... Well, you have to have, like, physical... motions when you're doing comedy. I feel like it's much more interesting.
Speaker: and i it depends on It depends on your style. Yeah. It depends on your style. um Being expressive helps.
Speaker: you choose horror Which is hard to do when you first start out. And it is. It's hard to do when you first start out because you're building up your confidence. And if when you first start out, if you don't feel the crowd is responding to you quickly enough, it's so easy to recede.
Speaker: You back off and that hinders your comedy. But yeah it takes it takes a while to build up confidence and it really does. takes a while to build up confidence.
Speaker: So you're not as expressive because you're not confident. And it's hard to do that in open mics. But once once you hit that right stride, and then it's like you let your shit go. you' You let yourself out there and you're more expressive.
Speaker: And when you're more expressive, that's like fucking nitroglycerin. It makes it better. It makes it better. And Once you get used to
Speaker: being yourself. That's and see my girl. Shit. Yeah. I've actually used that analogy. That's awesome that you get that. Yes. It's you, you know how they talk about tidal waves, the further the wave recedes, the harder it hits.
Speaker: So you're fucking on to something, definitely. You're on to something. Absolutely. Yes. I'm not shy by any means. so i have And i people get mad because I talk with my hands all the time. So that's like's not a problem with me.
Speaker: What are you doing? What are you doing? we me on I also have Tourette's, so that helps me. Is it legitimate Tourette's or self-diagnosed? Because I have the same thing. I have self-diagnosed Tourette's, especially in traffic.
Speaker: No, that's ADHD. Cartman style. Thank La petite Tourette. and La la la. Well, there's a like a smaller version of Tourette's as well. La la la. I forget what it's called.
Speaker: Brain fart. Brain fart. But no, I got, I ah recently got re-diagnosed with. Oh, so it's straight up. You weren't just bullshitting. Okay. so you goingnna all said So you're going to all of a sudden say shit, cock face, motherfucker. Don't do that.
Speaker: Don't do that. Oh my God. That's That's Carlin-esque. Well, what it does is it trips her up when you do that shit. Like it triggers. ah I didn't know this is a little bit for some of her. So I apologize.
Speaker: <unk>t It's funny. We're comedians bouncing off each other.
Speaker: i want to um give you a better, a little bit of a better introduction, Mike Meadows. Where are you from and how long have you been doing stand-up comedy, Mike? Okay. I'm from parts unknown.
Speaker: canada like the great you but I didn't hear what she said. I didn't hear what she said. Come on, you got a giant from Parts Unknown, right? yeah that That's... bed I grew up watching Grassley and you'd occasionally hear from Parts Unknown.
Speaker: But anyways... um We don't need that. I live in Shelby, Ohio. um I started comedy a little over nine years ago.
Speaker: A little over nine years ago. started off Do you remember what your first ah bit was about? huh but
Speaker: I kind of do. also i took that way i Action. go i was My first bit was about ah game shows.
Speaker: It was about game shows. I grew up watching game shows on TV, right? And it's like, is it as a kid, I would love to be on game shows. But now that I'm a bitter ass motherfucker, it wouldn't work out right.
Speaker: It wouldn't work out right. I get called down and people like, yeah, get the fuck off me. you You've seen game shows where people like, they're so happy you got called off. Yeah, like, no, I'm a bitter asshole.
Speaker: Get the fuck off me. Like, hey, did a bit about talking shit about Bob Barker. you know, getting called down with Price is Right. R.I.P.
Speaker: Right on. Right. And sorry that no one's around to tell people to neuter the dogs. Yeah.
Speaker: But yeah, i like, that was my bit. But my my first um performance, I was... I want to say two months. 30 years ago.
Speaker: 30 years ago. I like her. I like her. like her. I like you. but he was was It was two months after my wife passed, so I didn't perform as well as I thought.
Speaker: yeah I'm not trying to make this somber. RIP again. point of reference. So I didn't perform as well as I felt I could have. I shouldn't have been on a stage, but I did go on a stage and they say every journey begins with a single footstep.
Speaker: It wasn't a good footstep, but it was a footstep. I pretty much abandoned everything I did that day. But yeah, but the journey started.
Speaker: It wasn't a good beginning to the journey, but it started. And Brittany, you don't know the guy I'm about to talk to, but Michael does. That's when I met Tozer.
Speaker: That's when I met Tozer.
Speaker: So you remember Tozer, right? You're not acknowledging him. Don't know how to do it. And that's all you need to know, Brittany.
Speaker: This guy is a no comment. Like the worst comedian you could ever meet. No comment. No comment. No comment. You just said the fucking comment. What do you mean no comment? i but He said no comment.
Speaker: He said no comment. Like when you would watch this guy perform which I do love this guy. He's a good person, but big, but like you, could like when he would perform, you could feel the crowd not want to be alive.
Speaker: um No, seriously, not be they like you could feel they didn't want to be alive right now because this comedy was bad. Wish they were deaf.
Speaker: wish they were death
Speaker: i want to say both i want to say both i want to say both like he would would like his like i'm not trying to shit on the dude but i believe truth is truth his comedy was so his comedy was so terrible like he like he would just suck the life out of crowd Can you give me an example? of like one There were two people.
Speaker: Every time I saw him actually perform, there were two people laughing. Hisself and me in the back of the room at all the silence.
Speaker: I could not help myself. That awkwardness when someone's bombing and doesn't even realize they're bombing. In his mind, he is killing it.
Speaker: and he's always well He's killing something. He's killing something. He's killing the crowd's will to live. but i He produced shows. He put me on them. right With Mike's help also.
Speaker: And he paid me. I'll say that. What's up, Mandy? Thanks for coming out tonight. my day How are you seeing these people? I don't see these people you're talking to.
Speaker: That's okay. My birthday was fantastic. Thank you for asking, Mandy. 52 is looking good on me. But I'm not not surprised. Show your head.
Speaker: Show who's it. Oh, you're back to the Lex Luthor. You're back to the Lex Luthor. Ceremony's over. I'm allowed to take my hair off again.
Speaker: Dude, I'm really stuck here with three mics. I can't get You're back to the Lex Luthor. I love that. You are the Lex Luthor of comedy. the murderer he but He fucks with Superman. yeah What was your impetus for getting into comedy? What made you want to do it?
Speaker: you oh me Sorry, my dog's whining because he's not getting My impetus was oh like, I didn't realize until a certain point in my life that, oh oh, I'm the funny guy in almost every situation.
Speaker: I'm the funniest person in the room. And I didn't realize I'm like, oh, I make people laugh. I make people laugh. That's awesome. I, I didn't know if I was found funny or,
Speaker: or ah I'm going to use water cooler funny. Or if I had the metal to do it on stage, I didn't know. You said that I'm going to come back to that later. Thank you.
Speaker: And feed my wife, my wife always pushed me. She's like, you're the funny. Nobody's ever made me laugh like you. Nobody has ever made me laugh like you. And my buddy, Jimmy Lee, who was the one that trained me in pro wrestling, like, and he's not good giving compliments out.
Speaker: He's not. He likes compliments for himself. Love them, but understand the faults. One day, out of nowhere, he's like, dude, you should be on SNL.
Speaker: I'm like, really? Really? like, no, dude. I'm like, so how the fuck would I get on SNL? was like um Most of them get there from stand-up. I'm like, I never thought of myself that way. I didn't have the confidence.
Speaker: And I started... thinking, huh, maybe I could do it. Wasn't sure, wasn't sure, fuck. Had the dream for a while, was too busy taking care of my family.
Speaker: Couldn't afford to take a day off work because we're struggling to go to open mics, but finally got to the point where I could. like, fuck it. Let's try this shit, fuck.
Speaker: Do you remember where it was? Was it there in Mansfield?
Speaker: Yeah, the first time I did, yeah. It was in Mansfield. ah it was It was open mic at a coffee house. That's where I met Tozer and met Eddie.
Speaker: You remember Eddie? Yeah. and Yeah, I feel like I fucking totally fucked up. And I was so mad at myself. I was so mad at myself. I'm like, I've been wanting to do this for years and I've envisioned it my head and I fucking ate it.
Speaker: Forgive the term, a dick. Ate a dick. And I was so pissed. I was so pissed. I'm like, fuck. I've seen it in my head for years and I get up there and I fucking eat a dick.
Speaker: But it was like, there's something in me that can't quit. Okay. If I failed because I'm not funny, okay. because But I failed because I fucked up.
Speaker: So I'm like, I got to keep trying. as it turns out i want to hear what you think you did wrong. How did you fuck up?
Speaker: Huh? speak
Speaker: I wasn't polished. I went through this shit in head. Hear me out. i' You want to hear the story or not, motherfucker?
Speaker: Do I have to kill Richard Pryor on you? Motherfucker, shut the fuck up. Don't be a Richard. Have a coca smile. Shut the fuck up. Sorry, i just learned the Richard Pryor impression and I've been waiting to use it on you. So I used my Richard Pryor on you.
Speaker: But anyways, I i I went through my shit too quickly. I missed, I missed little bits. Like I had the crowd at first, but I missed little things that would have made it better.
Speaker: and I got in my head, I got my head and I started missing more shit that would have made this joke better. Got my head to where I should have just fucking called up. Like, thanks. and Have a good night.
Speaker: But I'm sitting there. like, I'm in my head. in my head i'm like fuck I can pull this out. I got more material. i got more material this's good material Two in my head.
Speaker: and it's just I didn't have the median experience on stage to be like, no, I'm good. Thanks. Have a good night. But I fucked There's a question from Lottie.
Speaker: Does every comedian tank at some time? Mandy's asking. She's curious. Does every comedian tank at some time? What do you think about that?
Speaker: Yes. Yes. Brittany, what do you think? well Oh, definitely. Because some of like the open mic nights and like improv, you can
Speaker: it's the laughter levels, man so If you don't get the laughter, you do get in your head like what you said. Exactly. And like the people that don't believe in you or whatever they get in your head, they're going to be like, oh, you're not going to make it. I've been going through that recently. And I've been like you said, you have to be well polished.
Speaker: I've been going through New Year's Eve bits over and over and over and over again, trying to just like make it perfect. And I've been in my head. But I know once I get up there, i it'll be it'll be good.
Speaker: I believe in How about you, Michael? How many times have you thanked? oh I think I can count them on one hand for sure. um there is a There was a thing about me at the... yeah So you and I started differently.
Speaker: You were doing bar shows. ah borrow rights Right. Those are fucking disastrous in my opinion. Oh, God, yes. Oh, God, yes. had i started more nervous Had I started in that environment, I would have quit, I think.
Speaker: um I wouldn't have put up with that shit. But I went to a comedy with training wheels. I was doing the amateur comedy contest at the funny stop in Cuyahoga Falls.
Speaker: Caucasian Falls. And I had not bombed one time, not even my first time. Did I do great? No, I'm not saying that at all. Did I kill? all No, no, no, no, no. no But I got laughs. I made it through all five minutes, and I didn't, like, just break.
Speaker: I did say into the microphone my first time up, though. This was harder than I thought it was going to be. But the guy got me like, you got this, you got this. Go, go, go. Picked me right back up, and I ended up getting good laughs for a first-timer. I've seen a lot of first-timers.
Speaker: um person, I think the first time I saw a cowboy go, he was probably a little more solid than I was my first time up. but yeaha ah She just say what I thought she said.
Speaker: You cowboy. know So she did say what I think she said. what one I started thinking I was bomb proof.
Speaker: It happened. Not and at what I call a real show. but at one of those you know unruly bar shows. And it did not break me. But I did, I think it was my first 30 minutes, and I was not ready for 30 minutes.
Speaker: It was one table. It was like a benefit for somebody. And it was one table only. It was watching and paying attention. And I was getting nods here and there and smiles here and there.
Speaker: Almost zero laughter. And it was fucking killing me. I stuck in there. I hung with it and I kept on going and I got through my 30 minutes.
Speaker: And that's when I realized I was made of. Now, if I'd started like that, there's no fucking way. right I disagree. I disagree. I know you better not.
Speaker: I know you better. You know, you're you're too stubborn. You're too stubborn to fucking quit after a bad show. You are. You're too goddamn stubborn for that.
Speaker: We have another question from the audience. Do you ever get laughs for something you did not think was funny? Yes, all the time, actually. Just on a daily basis.
Speaker: i think she means Specifically, I think you talking about on stage. yeah um Like when I was at um the open call shit or open mic stuff, I have had time.
Speaker: Like you guys said, the Tove, whatever his face. Toezer. Like he thought it was funny, but nobody else thought. that they did. Like, I had moments where I thought that because there would only be, like, a couple people laughing or whatever. yeah more That's more than he got, but continue, please. No, I mean, yeah, that's what I'm saying. Like, at least you got somebody to laugh, and that's really what you're there for, so.
Speaker: Right. You know. oh ah Sorry. Can I ask you how long you've been doing it? Well, on and off for about how old am I? Shit, don't know. It forget how old I was. Wow. We're yeah yeah all here. so Oh, yeah.
Speaker: Pause for a second. I just want to say live for Michael. Happy birthday yesterday. boy my mom fuck over You fucking old ass
Speaker: yeah
Speaker: Seriously? things that yeah yeah who forty two You look 22. Thank you. Anyways. Britt, we're going to be on New Year's Eve.
Speaker: I'm going to be at Wolverine, Ohio, and the Underground Lands. mean and knee I'm getting more and more excited, but also a little nervous at the same time.
Speaker: That's all right. Sorry, I didn't make you sound like... I didn't mean to sound like Dr. Phil. And that's okay. was That was exactly it. How about that? Mandy!
Speaker: You bitch. I am old. I don't care. As far as I'm going to address Mandy's question, do you ever get laughs for something you didn't think was funny? Yeah, yeah, yeah. Like in everyday life, maybe.
Speaker: But if it's not funny, I'm not taking it on stage. If I don't believe in the material, I'm not taking it up there. Right. Right. That's not what I'm supposed to do. I'm supposed to entertain. I'm supposed to make folks laugh.
Speaker: um I'm not trying to steal Mike's thunder, but I have another comedian in the house that I would like to just kind of get some different perspectives on some stuff. And when he comes in, I'll give him a quick intro. He's actually been on with us once months before for movie night. ah But I want to bring up something that you brought up earlier, Mike, and ask you guys about that.
Speaker: What's up, Ryan? What's up, Ryan? Boys and girls and Michael Meadows, how you guys been? still
Speaker: playing my camera. There we go. Ryan, real quick, what you at? Is that Ryan Weiss? What's up, guys? How you doing? Hell yeah, i ain't seen you in a minute.
Speaker: Yeah, I'm still alive and so are you. Yeah, don't remind me. Yeah, no. you of us hard lady Neither have movie either. I don't like, oh, shit, man. We got much longer. You better get your will in order. We got much left. Right, right. Happy birthday, Michael. One of is next. all to jump knee Ryan, of your guys in comedy, ah how long have you been in the game? how When was your first time on stage? Do you recall how long you've this?
Speaker: Uh, I do, but I'm not going to out myself live on air like that because I'm still a nobody. So, uh, I'll be sharing this in a second. So there'll be more than six, but yeah, no, a while, a while, pretty more than a decade, um, more than a decade on stage.
Speaker: Um, my comedy count is higher than my body count, but you know, that's not really an achievement. Um, oh But no, it's good. I've been doing it a while. how about wait how Mike, how long have you been doing it? Because you started a little after me, but not much.
Speaker: Nine years, he said. Yeah. Nine years? Yeah, nine years. yeah No, no, no. Wrong Mike. Michael Copenhagen. Oh, me? Yeah, you can distinguish between Michael and Mike. He's Michael on Mike.
Speaker: Okay. My first time on stage was April 2019. Okay, see you, Mikey. I'm having some of you. What's up? 27B. You asked a question. I'm going to ask you, Ryan, to get your opinion real quick.
Speaker: ah Do you ever get laughs for something on stage you don't think is funny? love it all the time. That's why i love tests and jokes. It's all the time. You'll be like, this part is not funny, and they're dying.
Speaker: yeah but If you don't think it's funny, why did you get on stage with you? Well, know what I'm saying is a lot of times like I'll be doing a bit and I got one I'm not going to do, but I'll be doing a bit that I'm working on. I'm like, this is the punchline. And then they'll start laughing at a part of the joke that you did not think was the punchline.
Speaker: And that's like that. And I'll just start doubling down on whatever that was. Like, I'll just let a cascade, you know. No, but yeah, that's that all the time. All right, and one more question for you from the audience.
Speaker: Do you think that every comedian tanks at some time or not another? Yeah, we all fucking suck. I mean, this is hard. we yeah You know, I was thinking about the other day because I was going back through some old pictures of of stuff I've done, and you understand, we're in a weird career path. Like, everyone else, you get on stage, and there's a backup dancer. There's another member of the band. there's There's lights. There's sound effects.
Speaker: When we take the stage, it's us, the mic, and the voices in our head. And we're either going to be funny or we're not. Everybody tanks. Doesn't mean nothing.
Speaker: I've seen headliners. I've seen headliners that are making money in the industry eat shit. Everybody tanks. Me too. And I got one more question I want to ask the both of you guys. And Britt, too, want hear what you have to say.
Speaker: Greeny, is it better to ignore a heckler or deal with it? Deal with it. Deal with it. down with a fucking heckler. That's like crowd work.
Speaker: Michael, I know you don't like crowd work, but I'm here for it. I'm Michael. you don't like Hold on, Mike. Hold on. you Ryan, what did how do you, Ryan, deal with a heckler if you get A couple different ways. um I mean, you can call them out if it's ignorant. You can make fun of them. You can let them you can let the joke write itself. Like,
Speaker: At my last show, I had a heckler during one of my dating shows that, like, if they gave me a new punchline. So literally was just like, you know what? You're right. Da-da-da-da-da. That did happen. And I just started adding on to I let it cascade, like I said.
Speaker: um I think that it was that usual. I'm on every dating site known to man. And he was like, yeah, none known to woman. You should try black.com.
Speaker: And I was like, well, actually, I am a card-holding member of Black.com. And I was surprised that I got in. But, you know they must have ran my credit course or something, you know. I i let it go. i let it go.
Speaker: I don't mind a heckler. Like you said, like, you can feed off of their negative energy and just, like, fuck with them. And then a lot of hecklers will...
Speaker: fuck with you even more and they actually end up laughing at the shit that you're saying to them after a while. Not all of them.
Speaker: I've got a story for you when I hear Mike's answer. you Usually when someone heckles you they are trying to draw attention themselves like hey I can be funnier than this guy so you gotta shut him down right the fuck away to show there's a reason I'm on stage and you're not.
Speaker: Elsewise, you can burn your ass up on stage. You've got to shut them down. Well, see, that's what saying. just want to tag in here because that's what was going to say. There's different ways to do it. You can shut them down by making them the butt of the joke and making them feel stupid.
Speaker: But I like to take what they did and rework it because it's kind of like ah it's like a cold flex. It's like right like, yeah, no, I'm the professional. Thank you for the help, but I don't need it. Right. like right But at the same time, um you also have to gauge ah how things are going.
Speaker: You want to shut them down without being a complete asshole. But then you lost the crowd. Lost the crowd. You never want to lose the crowd. know that but also its ain't got to do with Matt is... matt re is kit He goes full asshole and it works for him. putting these cream He's done it in the right way.
Speaker: Yeah. got it That's the thing. You've got to do it in the right way. You've got to do it in a fun and funny way. But if you're just a straight up asshole, shut the fuck up, motherfucker.
Speaker: Sit down. That doesn't work. You're going to lose the crowd. You've got to do it. Oh, yeah. You have to be like awesome right with it. Yes. Yes. You don't just, I'll fucking stab you motherfucker.
Speaker: You don't do that. I will do that. no but i get out you wanted but go ahead I'm about to reinforce everything you just said with a true story. My first heckler was at a show on December 23rd. It's 100% true. I'm not embellishing anything at all.
Speaker: um It was December twenty third and uh the producer of the show was sitting next to a blonde and she was jabbering through everybody's set to him hey bongs what up fidel johnny johnny bongs and the hizzy hashtag don't show anger show sarcasm true true true uh it's about september 23rd this lady's talking to everybody's set i'm getting angrier and angrier angrier that the uh producer of the show isn't shutting her up I mean, she's talking to you. You're talking about her. Why don't you fucking tell her to be quiet or take her to the back of the room?
Speaker: Okay? So I get up, and I said to ah another comedian I was sitting with. We used to be really tight, not so much anymore, but no, you know, Wilter, the I'm going to mention him.
Speaker: ah I said, I can't wait until I go. going to handle this bitch. So I go up. and I come out and I'm firing on all cylinders. I'm hitting them. I got her attention. Everyone's into it. and that Boom. she still She turns and starts. but but but but I stopped right there. I said, excuse me, ma'am. Do you you von lady yeah yeah yeah have children?
Speaker: Yeah, i have two. and then named I don't care about their names. I don't care anything about your children. I just want to say to you, I hope that you die on Christmas morning. That's a Michael move. yeah like michael that's michael move See, that wasn't the right thing to do. You could hear a pin drop in that place. Nice table, and ladies in from an office were having their little office party there, their office Christmas party.
Speaker: And yeah. It did shudder the fuck up. perhaps But the rest of the room as well, I mean, dude, you could hear a pin drop. Everyone was just like, but to be fair, I meant it.
Speaker: saw... I was watching a standup comic. I can't remember his name off the top my head. Mexican. he had like this woman, like yelling at him while he was on stage. And he was like, all right, you have five seconds to shut the fuck up.
Speaker: She wasn't even like heckling. She was just like being rude. And he was like, okay, yeah, security, take them out. Like people actually have people taken out of their shows.
Speaker: Um, And one dude even got arrested and there was a fight and shit like that. so like It's insane how serious people get. It's fucking comedy. i know brit Here's the thing, right? That is not for the comedian's sake.
Speaker: That's for every other audience member's sake. yeah They pay come in there and see comedy. Nobody paid to listen to a drunk twat shouting dumb shit at a fucking comedian.
Speaker: Like, go home. Because they're... interrupting the flow of the comedian. but he's not able to be as funny because you're disrupting the flow and everyone's there to be entertained.
Speaker: And that swat waffle, whatever you want to call her, he's interrupting, but which is, which is disrupting everyone's entertainment. So in that situation, the bitch needs to go or the asshole needs to go because guys do it too.
Speaker: Some drunk fuck won't shut the fuck up because I've dealt with hecklers and I've dealt with drunk ass hecklers. Put them in their place and people laugh at them and they won't shut the fuck up. So they just got to go.
Speaker: They just to go. Cheers, Johnny Bungs. When I produce a show at the top of the show before anything begins, I make sure everyone understands that nobody came to hear any of you.
Speaker: You have three reactions. Laugh, clap, boo. If you have to chit chat amongst yourselves and you can't be quiet about it, if you can't use your inside voice, go the fuck outside. Have you been booed before?
Speaker: Booed? No, never. I've seen one dude act like he was wanting to stab or shoot you, but he didn't boo you.
Speaker: but he didn want you i was going I He wanted to stab or shoot you, but he didn't boo you. case Yeah, I had to bite my tongue. I was going to say the wrong thing and potentially start a riot.
Speaker: Yeah. And it wasn't your fault. It was a bad audience member. at the same time, I'm sitting there circling the goddamn room like, ah I got to make sure this guy ain't going to stab or shoot Michael.
Speaker: My wife was correcting me and told me I have booed you.
Speaker: but not You love my shit more than anybody else loves my shit. My wife corrected me. She said that she has booed me. Oh, okay. I heard you wrong.
Speaker: She must have done it quietly. I don't remember. That's your boo. Yeah, she's a wife. She's supposed do shit like that. You're boo booed, you. Now, ah Ryan, I got a question for you that i asked michael ah Mike earlier.
Speaker: What was your impetus for getting into standup comedy? What made you want to do it? That's
Speaker: a hard one. That's what she said. um I hope so. I mean, you're getting up there, buddy. You're getting up there. up there. That's what she said also. when i do bad right You Like, comedy was always my mom's thing. We would watch all the greats. We had a bunch of the old VHSs and DVDs.
Speaker: So I don't know if it was that or if it was just... I... started the same way I still kind of practice sometimes I am just a goof in public like I started doing comedy telling jokes and cashier lines whether I was checking out and line was long as hell or one of my first jobs I worked at Circle K and I would just you know it's 12 o'clock at night you're drunk off your ass buying beer and I don't give a shit I'm going to see how many people in my line I can make laugh and I don't care how long it takes to get you guys in and out of here
Speaker: I don't know. It's hard to say. One of those two, one of those two, Mike. One for you, Ryan. That's why I made you want to start doing comedy it was just working at a fucking grocery store and making fun people. like I liked that I could make people laugh, and then at some point it was like, oh, you could could do this.
Speaker: Yeah, that's awesome. Do you remember the first bit you ever did your first time on stage? It's probably either Karen or the hand on Titty was the first funny bit that i ever did.
Speaker: maybe Not the first funny bit. The very first bit you ever did. No, but I found an old booklet the other day and they're all cringe. They're all pretty bad, bro.
Speaker: I hope that every new comic makes it long enough to find one of their old writing books and actually that a decade ago. Oh, I brought some of them back out. dont yeah um I paused those fuckers off and tried them again, but Some of them are bad. Oh, man.
Speaker: And sometimes I'll be like awake ah in the middle of the night drunk, and I'll like write down random shit just because I can't sleep. And then the next morning, and I'll read what I said. I'm like, what the fuck was I thinking? Like, what?
Speaker: I used to do a bit where I'd go through my old notes for bits that never made it to stage. with little short notes that thought, oh, this will definitely, you know this will you know bring it back to my brain.
Speaker: So far removed from that moment moment later on that never ran it, I had no idea what they might've been. And I would just read the notes out loud. And they were actually funny just doing the notes with no idea what the fucking material was supposed to be.
Speaker: Yeah, but you'd smoke too much. Hey. no know them Can I ask the next question? Yeah. And whoever wants to answer first, like me personally, I cannot sit down and write.
Speaker: I literally can't put a pen and paper and come up with anything good. So what is your guys' writing style? Oh, see, I see. That was going to be my question. What?
Speaker: I'm glad you asked that. That to my question. Really? We both had the same question and we both did that. That's what she said the same time. But go ahead.
Speaker: You have the floor. You take the lead on this one. You answer first. you are ah Well, like Michael said, he would write down like keywords or whatever, thinking that he would remember what he was trying to talk about.
Speaker: actually i was gonna bring that up as one of my bits but now i fucking can't no but like i'll re-read them like these are all over the place like come on different angles and shit but i'll circle the ones that i think have promise and then i'll rewrite then fa those ah And they do chaotic, chaotic manifestos. Is that sound about you?
Speaker: Chaotic manifestos? Pretty much, yeah. So you write out the stuff, word it like every last word, how you want to bring it out, how do you want to present it? have i've started to write more than just key words, yes, so I can remember.
Speaker: um Because before I would just like just do a couple of words. But now I i write out more of it. kind of It pisses me off, too, because I'm like, damn, I'm tired, I want to go to sleep, but all I can think about are the fucking jokes.
Speaker: Welcome to the comedy world. What? ah I said, welcome to the comedy world, yeah. um actually It's madness. wall We're all mad.
Speaker: I'm really glad that Britt shared that, because I was mid-asking... Does anyone else write like a complete mess? Right. Cause like I, I do the same thing. Like I'll try to write in my notebooks and my handwriting is awful. And I have the, I have the ADHD. So I'm all me too i will circling things.
Speaker: You know, the fun thing when I go to my notebook, like we always tell new comics, don't bring your notes on stage. You look unprofessional. I would look like an episode of Criminal Minds. Figure out my own notes. Like I'd be up there. There'd be so many awkward pauses of you trying to figure out what I circled.
Speaker: So writing, I, like I said, I test a lot of stuff on random people. I still like to just go out and make people on the street laugh, but um I like long drives.
Speaker: Yes. I've, I've a hundred percent been unable to decipher a joke and I'm just staring at it for like, 10 minutes and eventually just like, well, fuck it. It wasn't funny. If it was funny, it would come back to me.
Speaker: You know, I don't, I don't know. But I'm just like looking at it in Greek. It's, it's beautiful. I'm like, and I'm bad, dude. Cause I, anyways, I'll skip letters and words. Like I'll put like half the word down. Like,
Speaker: The ADHD is strong with me, dude. Like i's my writing is ridiculous. i Like if you, you ever want to see mental illness, just look at my notebook. It looks like that. I have great handwriting, but like with the ADHD thing, like you said, I have to get that shit down quick or I'm just like gone and I won't fucking remember it. Yeah, you're racing to get down. So I found, i found long drives and and voice notes.
Speaker: My phone has a million and one stupid voice notes. Oh shit. You just reminded me. i have voice. thats i Thank you. So you don't generally put pen to paper and write out your material, Brian?
Speaker: No. What I'll do usually is I'll take the voice notes. I'll take the long drives. I have bits that I'm working. And then like you pre-show or, you know, I'll take a piece of paper and I'll write Karen dating.
Speaker: fat jokes. you know ah That's what I wanted to say as well. Snoddy, he's going to be with us on the New Year's Eve show. Tyler Snodgrass. He gave me, well, him and Michael gave me the tip to give your jokes a name.
Speaker: Snoddy gave you the tip? me That's my little sister. for like like That's my big bro, dude. I didn't know that.
Speaker: Well, fuck you, Michael. You're an asshole anyway. So... Is that your sister? Yes. Thanks for the fucking... Thanks for the process. That's not the show. though So, Mike, what's your process?
Speaker: Oh, my process? It's somewhat similar to Ryan's. Like, there's been times in the past like, fuck, I have these thoughts. i I should write them down because I have thoughts. And then by the time I get home from work, boom, go on, go on.
Speaker: Fuck. I had an idea about something. What was that? Shit, I don't know. Shit. Because I used to drive truck and my best ride, I can't sit down to pen and paper. I can't.
Speaker: It's all pure garbage. It's garbage. I'm a visual learner. So like reading it. And I can see them in my brain If I read it down i remember it better Gotcha But with me with me it's i have to Like said I can't sit down and write shit Because it's garbage I basically like Either at work or driving My mind goes on What I call walkabout I grew up watching Crocodile Dunby That's not a life What's that? Hi mate
Speaker: That's not enough. He would go on walkabout. Right? So I have the... In my mind... My mind has to go on walkabout. And just... I have an idea.
Speaker: and just... My mind just... Goes the fuck... Just walks on. Like, okay. And just think... Not even... I don't know thinking is the right way to say it. I just... Okay. That seems funny.
Speaker: And my mind just keeps exploring. Okay, okay. Oh, shit. I got something here. Or sometimes, sometimes it's, yeah, I got something, but it's not as good as other shit I have.
Speaker: Have you ever made yourself laugh at your own jokes? I, I, I, affirm nor deny said allegation levied against me. begin yes I've laughed so hard I couldn't finish this shit. I've laughed so hard while telling a joke to people that I'm like, just give me one second. yeah like i yeah And they're laughing too, usually. That's what's the best part. They're like... yeah like Do you do crowd work, Brian?
Speaker: Yeah. I'm getting better at that, actually. I was to say, ah since we all have the same type of tism, apparently, ADHD is motherfucking fuck. Yeah. I'm going to be trying, I'm going be trying for Christmas. I'm going to got, I've seen these pendants, um, pendant cameras with like a mic on them.
Speaker: I'm going to get one. So when I do my people on the street, I'm literally just going to like, Hey guys, I'm a comic. Uh, you mind if I test some material on you? Cool. Cool. I'm actually filming though. So by staying here, you consent. And then I'm just going to Cause I'm telling you, I wrote a jet. I wrote a joke this week and it's hilarious. So I wrote on Monday.
Speaker: I'm in the kitchen at my work making all the kitchen staff die, like die, hunched over, just I'm going. And it was a joke about a girl in a red dress that came to a previous show, ah whatever, whatever.
Speaker: I went home that day, I came back and I'm literally talking to friend, I'm like, i was making you guys die laughing yesterday and I can't remember what I was talking about. And then I was like, oh wait, it was you in the red dress. That's what, yeah.
Speaker: I need to write that shit down. That needs to be happening right now. So, um yes, we we all need to get some kind of medical assistance, I think. We do. ah to Since you guys have done crowd work, have you ever used something in crowd work?
Speaker: that it worked really well, the next time that situation comes up, like, oh shit, I can use that again. Or even throw it into the material.
Speaker: That's part of improv, really. Honestly, when it works, you gotta use it again. Michael uses the same old joke all over again, too. I'll ask a lot of the same questions in crowd work again and again.
Speaker: and i know the answers are gonna be funny. You know, like, are you guys Are you guys together? because you're sitting kind of far apart. I didn't know. oh you guys are really close. You're like brother and sister. That's a little weird. i just Are we in Kentucky? Like, what's happening? Like, you know. i um That's why, when who mentioned Matt Reif earlier?
Speaker: He's blinded. Okay, so Matt Reif, he does a lot of the same shit now. And he's kind of gotten old, in my opinion. Because he does the same shit.
Speaker: and ask the same questions. Since you brought that up, I'm going to the two of you with more experience on stage. overnight How do you think great crowd workers such as Matt Reif, such as... Who else is really great? Tom Segura. Great at crowd work. greatd proud wolf How do they get great at crowd work? What do you think, Ryan? How do they do it?
Speaker: and michael blausine They get quick they get quick. i don't know how they get quick. There's different ways you can do it, but they get... the The responses need to be funny, but they also need to be fast. Like it's, it's, and so they'll like, if you watch, I just watched the Matt ripe hour long special. I'm telling you, the christmas one yeah water you can watch shit load when he does it. And like, he's loading the chamber in like 10 seconds, man. And it's fine because he also, I've watched him.
Speaker: He lets you see him think about it for a second. And then it's just go, go, go, go. I will say his like Christmas special that he just came out with was pretty good. And you never know what the audience is going respond to with those questions that he asks repeatedly in different shows that he has.
Speaker: So, I mean, it's repetitive, but it's also not because it's how the audience reacts to it in response to... It's rep repetitive to the real watcher. But in the moment live, it doesn't seem repetitive.
Speaker: Ryan, one follow-up question to what you were saying earlier. Do you think any of those reels with Matt Reif killing at crowd work are the very first time he asked that question?
Speaker: You must be pooping. Take it, Mike. what do you think? Honestly, i think you're definitely on to something because I do crowd work and sometimes it's boom.
Speaker: It comes out of your head. But as I kind of sort of touched on a little bit ago, it's like it worked one time and I'm ready for it the next time. So he has gone through it.
Speaker: And I feel like, cause I love crowd work too, because it makes more personal to the crowd. But us like, there's times where I do.
Speaker: Okay. There's a joke where I talk about who's got dogs. And one time someone was like, would tell me how big their dogs were. And my mind went poof.
Speaker: You must go through a lot of peanut butter. yeah So I did it one time. So it's one and done, right? Nope. It's one and done. So, oh shit, I'm going to use that whenever someone talks about all these big dogs.
Speaker: In the last show I did with you, I did that. And it's... What makes it hilarious is when the person that says, yeah, yeah we go through a lot of peanut butter.
Speaker: They didn't get it. What I'm talking about with the peanut butter and dogs thing. So I use it once works great. So I use it more. So at scene rates it seems like i literally just came up with it.
Speaker: Exactly. They didn't know how many shows I've done where I've done that. And that's kind of my point. I just believe for a minute. that I won't say it never, ever happens. I'll never say never. and Very rarely is that very first bit of crowd work so fire.
Speaker: It's a reel. Once in a while, sure. But those...
Speaker: are crafted over years of different crowds, different answers, different situations, and his responses are already in load. Like you said, they're already loaded. He's not thinking about it. He's making it look like he's thinking because it doesn't want to seem like it's rote.
Speaker: Right. plus Plus, I did watch that special, and he kind of set people up. He kind set people up to say about Santa or this or that shit.
Speaker: And he probably thought this shit through. Some of it may have fucking up out of nowhere. Right. But I personally can't fault him for that. He's an entertainer.
Speaker: Some people think that like they plant people in the crowd to... Yeah, and he made mention of that. Yeah. And some people do, though. Some people do, but I'm sure I haven't seen it, but I'm sure I'm sure you got some people who do.
Speaker: I'm really glad she brought that up. Looked like religion asked me about doing that. How do I feel? He asked me, how do you feel about if I have a friend of mine do this and then I can do that? the I was like, so you're saying you're going have somebody planned out to try to interrupt you so you can do something about it.
Speaker: Why don't you just bring them on stage? comedy Right. mi May as well do a dual act. That does feel shitty in my opinion. yeah that feels like That does. It's entertaining. I'll give you that. But at the same time, i mean a crowd plant just seems gimmicky.
Speaker: It seems. yeah It's just it not genuine. Right. Exactly. Michael Blaustein, he's one of my favorites. Oh, Some of my favorite comedians, they have weird laughs and people laugh at their laughs.
Speaker: You know what I mean? Eddie Murphy has changed his entire laugh from raw and comedian and what's the other one? ah Delirious.
Speaker: Yes, thank you. You're welcome. That laugh used to have is gone. He doesn't use it anymore. o but Stand up. Yeah. Partly because it wasn't fun for him anymore. so There was zero challenge.
Speaker: right he was He was doing a set. I think it was in New York City. It might have been... but he was thinking charge name he was just walking and just making silly faces, doing the laughing shit and getting all sorts of hilarity.
Speaker: And he hated it. He's like, I'm not doing anything funny. This is boring. Yeah, they're just laughing off his name. Oh, it's Eddie Murphy. Every goddamn thing he's going to say is funny.
Speaker: I mean, he made it this far. I'm not saying he's not funny. I never said that. I never would. Eddie Murphy should be on the Mount Rushmore of Congress. yeah <unk> Oh, How about we do that?
Speaker: Not yet. We got questions. they got We got guests. We'll do it at the end. Yes, sir. So back to this question here from Mandy. I'm going to show my age. She says, but crib notes? Question mark. I don't know what crib notes are.
Speaker: Cheap sheets. Cheap sheets. When you're open mic-er, yeah. But when you're getting paid, no. If you're getting paid, sorry for interrupting you.
Speaker: If you're getting paid, you should have your shit down. You should know what you're going to say. It is unprofessional as fuck, in my opinion. Open mics, yes.
Speaker: Use all the damn notes you want on open mics. But if you're getting paid, you should have your shit down enough. but we're getting get to sit there Because I've done paid shows. Are you jacking off or something? What the fuck are you doing?
Speaker: I'm waving my hand. I use my hands a little. I'm not jacking off. It's not that kind shit.
Speaker: oh that's no no i use my hand I'm not saying like have your papers there and my take Well i'm open mic open mic it's okay But if you have a stool there and it's just sitting there and you have like your little keynotes after you've already figured it out like you can peek down but not just be like this Well, definitely.
Speaker: But on open mic, that's okay, because it's basically practice. it's You're working in the gym kind of sort of thing. But if you're paid, if you get paid... It's a metaphor. I don't need to. Look at this. um re son it's It's a metaphor.
Speaker: Open mic, yeah. Use notes. But if you're getting paid... You better not show up on New Year's Eve because I'm going to be using some motherfucking notes. A lot of stand-ups for a special. I'll show up on New Year's Eve. it's so A lot of stand-ups on stage, like when they're taping a special or something, not all, but many, will have a teleprompter.
Speaker: Yes, that too. Yeah, you can see their eyeballs over to the...
Speaker: yeah you can see their eyeballs over to the yeah Well, times maybe that makes me a comedy snob. I feel like if someone's banned me, I'm going to have to look at nothing. I know my shit.
Speaker: I know my shit. I may go over it before the show, but I just feel like if you're getting paid, you shouldn't have to look at it. It's the A.T.
Speaker: me thing. I have a tool. I have a bag. You're better than me. Ryan, what are your thoughts on notes on stage?
Speaker: I, uh... Small? Wait. Anyways, continue, Ryan. Sorry. What are you calling small? and um yeah um Anyway, I'm sorry. I'm being ridiculous.
Speaker: You have children. I saw all the pictures you took down in the background.
Speaker: The only horse in the race that I have is professionalism. um Look, I don't really care. um i book i book off of who's funny. I sit in the back and you make me laugh. You get one grade. You don't make me laugh. You get another grade.
Speaker: I don't really give a shit if you whip your notes out, but I know that other bookers do. Whip their notes out.
Speaker: Whip your notes out. Oh, notes. Sorry for that. I know the other bookers do, and I know that enough other bookers do that. I wouldn't do it.
Speaker: Like it's, it's a large enough percenter of the old guard that hires people that like, yeah, no, if they see you pull your little notebook out, run professional, he's not prepared.
Speaker: Uh, you might get a gig out of it, but they're going to pay you less. and it's it's It's a, it's a stigma, but for me it's weird because I love watching the old pros. Like, my favorite thing is when I'm watching a special now and you'll see someone glance a teleprompter or in some cases they'll actually bring their notebook out because they're so big they don't care. They're filming a special and testing material. They don't care. So they'll bring like a whole ass fucking notebook like this out? No, no. Much smaller, like a little.
Speaker: But you'll see. I can't remember I'm thinking of, but you'll see in a couple the specials I'll literally... Maybe it was Chappelle. I think in Chappelle, one of his shows, he was just like, sitting on a stool, smoking in classic Chappelle. And like, he just literally looked down at what he was going to say next and just was like, i don't like that one. don't like that one.
Speaker: And went with one. So that's probably, that's probably late night at like the comedy store. Yeah. And he's just there working. Yeah. The stage time that we we die for it to them. It's just like, yeah, this is my open mic.
Speaker: Yeah. This is just, this is, I come here to test stuff. Whatever. Yeah. I'll just have like a little sticky note. And like I was talking about earlier, when they said like, give your jokes a name so you can remember it. Just like, put those down and remember the joke.
Speaker: If you're going to do it, be discreet. Okay? Like, yeah you're going to do it, have a sticky note, put it on the stool next to your glass, and yeah you can glance at it and not pick it up. But I'm telling you, there's enough bookers out there that if they see you pick up a note and start reading stuff, you're just not goingnna you're not going to get the gig.
Speaker: plus Plus, also, I want to say two things. Brittany Ditch. And this isn't denigrating. No, it's Brittany Ditch. You are new to it.
Speaker: So we're not holding you to that standard. and So don't think that's what's going on. Oh, no, no. Also... but the all go ahead I'm sorry. I'll finish this and let you talk.
Speaker: The crowd will see that. And they, because they're paying, they're seeing someone reading shit. They're going to think, oh, this is just some bum off the street.
Speaker: And they're going to fully buy into you. Bum off the street, probably a little harsh in saying that. hey Well, I'm not from Ohio.
Speaker: They will see it like that. They will see it like, she don't belong on stage or he don't belong on stage. So, yeah. so So, it's not being just being a snob. It's just like you have to project to the crowd that you belong on stage. ah for you're reading if you're reading If you're reading shit on stage, it doesn't matter how funny your shit is.
Speaker: they're going to see They're not going to take you seriously. They're not going to laugh as hard as they should at your jokes. think In a way, check out. I've asked a lot of different comedians or whatever the same question. and It's been like 50-50.
Speaker: a lot of people say yeah it's like unprofessional. and Honestly, I'm not doing the comedy to make money. it's just I like to make people happy. right They don't pay me because I'm reading a fucking note. Fuck you. I don't care. but People are still laughing.
Speaker: That part I get. But the other part that I said is, like, when I first started, when I first started doing shows that funny stopped, my shit was funnier than many others.
Speaker: But I was nervous. And because I was nervous, they didn't buy into me. If I'd have written stuff on stage, they wouldn't have bought into me. They may have laughed, but they speak I don't know how to explain this part.
Speaker: If they don't buy into you, they're not going to laugh as hard as they could or should or would. so I get that. and i get I get that you're new.
Speaker: i get that. But it's just something you know to throw into you learning something. but If you're not looking to make it big, that's fine.
Speaker: but i mean I'm going to make it big, bitch. Watch me whip. Watch me notes, notes. I know. I love that. that i okay So what's Michael's view on the notes on stage?
Speaker: It's a regular college rule kind of notebook, right? Looks like. Sure. so if you're going use something like this, it shouldn't be visible. Right. Everybody can be on pole.
Speaker: It's considered a cardinal sin. have a notebook on stage. Oh, a notebook, yeah, for sure. Wrong. And I'm going to agree with that. If you're getting paid, you shouldn't be visibly looking at notes, reading them verbatim or whatever. You should know it.
Speaker: You should know it. You should practice it and enough to know it
Speaker: it. So, Lazy Jive, there's a common sense. Lazy Jedi. He's a friend of the show. Loves comedy. Went on a comedy vacation, actually. He went to the mothership in Texas, then out to the comedy store and stuff. The whole comedy tour of watching comedy for his vacation.
Speaker: As a comedy fan, funny wins in the end. Reading it does dampen the effect rather than just speaking it. But if it's really good, reading it can be forgiven. Agreed. That cardinal sin, that golden rule you don't break, right, made Deion Cole.
Speaker: Oh, I know who you're talking about now. Yeah. He had that little notebook and lay had that pencil. But he made it work, though. He he found a way to make it part of the act. little A little bit of a shtick, a little bit of a crutch or whatever, whatever you want to call it.
Speaker: But it works. What was he doing? That guy i can't even speak and he uses his phone to talk. He has cerebral palsy and he can't speak. It's kind of He has this phone and like he like types out everything it says it.
Speaker: I'll have to send it to you. in first time That was fucking terrible. He's actually really fucking funny. He makes it like two disabilities. And then that one chick that's in a wheelchair.
Speaker: She has notes.
Speaker: I have no fucking idea what you're talking about. A giant... Oh, well, the cerebral palsy guy and her did like a roast together or like on stage, like two disabilities. Dude, I got to send it to you It's so fucking funny.
Speaker: What does he say? and He knows you're talking about and it makes act really funny. It is. It does. Do you know how long he went? How many minutes did he do? Was it an hour long? Like ah a full headline set?
Speaker: um He is pretty big. Yeah. Fuck. I can't fucking remember his name. Excellent. Help us out, Jedi. You got it. Yeah, Jedi. Don't you like your language, Brittany? This is a good Christian comedy show.
Speaker: You're on my show, bitch. My grandfather was a pastor, so don't even tell me. No, you know. No, don't know who he is.
Speaker: But like a big notebook like this? No, never. Yeah. yeah But you know, the little, ah just the facts, man, little flip top kind, just miss but those things, right? You know what I'm talking about? no Yeah.
Speaker: if You flip it over the top and they go, right. So well I've used those before, but I tear the page off, the little piece of paper page. And it's not true it's not so wide.
Speaker: It goes all the way around a beer bottle.
Speaker: So if you're holding your bottle or your glass or whatever, and you have it your hand, you can just glance back to it and you've got your notes there. Cheers to that. Or if actually it's flat on a table next to your beer.
Speaker: You go to grab your beer or whatever you're drinking, water, soda, whatever. You can glance at your notes, take a sip, and then pick up where you left off. not I like to use the notes myself.
Speaker: but only on long minutes, like if I'm doing an hour or more, 45 plus. I like to have those notes just to keep things in the right structured order. I'll just draw right on my arm and people just think it's a tattoo.
Speaker: Yeah, sounds awesome. Nope, but I'm looking for a tincture. I agree with that note. This is why I said I have no horse in this race. I'm telling you what I've heard from other other producers, but funny is funny.
Speaker: If you got a little you got a little note in your hand and you pull it out and you make it part of the act that's just funny, i don't care. I care if you make my crowd laugh. That's what I care about. why but you guys again i ah I'm along the same lines as ah the comedy purist in me.
Speaker: Won't hold it in my hand. Yeah. yeah no but i'll st if you new And if you're new, this i trick the bottle trick is good. You just put it in your pocket too. A lot of times when i was new, if I just had it,
Speaker: I didn't need it. I just like it felt good to have it. You know, right? Like I could look if I need to. I'm gonna shut for a minute. i I'm sorry. Well, it's all good. It's all good. I want to hear your thoughts. They hear me every week.
Speaker: I just think that if if you're in an open mic, sure, you're working something for the first time, maybe you want those notes. You don't miss a beat in the bit. But once it's worked and you're running it,
Speaker: You shouldn't need to have to read it every single damn time. we See, that's what trying to say. You just said it better. That's what I trying to say. Open mic, yeah. Like when I was doing open mics, I would have flashcards.
Speaker: Or at some point, I even had something on my phone like this bit and maybe sub part of it to remember it. Then the next and the next. But after so long...
Speaker: You know, you need to start remembering it when you're getting paid. Well, that's why I think the tip about giving your jokes a name or a title, you know, helps. Here's the other thing. You know, the other aspect of it is, like, motivation and, and like, wisdom from, you know, get your failures in, right? Like, that's the other thing about your notes and why I think some of the old guys are so against it. Like, okay, you got ADHD. You can't remember your set.
Speaker: Go on stage and bomb because you forgot where you were going and learn from it. See what happens. You know, you're up there for five minutes and you bomb out for minute and a half and then you just start doing crowd work and you wind up being funny. Cool.
Speaker: You just completely tank. I bet you won't forget again. Exactly. I bet you go home and practice. Right. Get your reps in. Get your failures in. Yeah. Fail forward. Fail forward, baby.
Speaker: yeahs can't learn anything from winning all the time. No.
Speaker: I never used notes for five-minute sets, even when I was first on stage. Never, ever. title i see like New Year's Eve, I'm not going to need notes. I'm not going to need notes. I'm just going to write down the titles of each little bit that I have. Because I have it up here. I've been practicing with my mic stand and my stool and my mic.
Speaker: So I got this, bitch. You're supposed to loosen your stool without using a whole mic stand, you know? Yeah. I like leaning on it. Whoa. Floor.
Speaker: That's my whole thought on it. I mean, I'm with Ryan. it Funny it is funny, period. Right, right.
Speaker: Me personally, as a producer, i don't know how Ryan feels about this, or or mike Mike produces also. i don't care if I like you. I don't care if I even like you. If you're funny, I'll put you on a show and I'll pay you to do it.
Speaker: oh He likes me, guys. what else yeah bell lo What's up, dude? up, dude? Yeah,
Speaker: Michael's too nice sometimes, though. So I'm like, is he just being nice? To who?
Speaker: No, listen. and i'll I want your two comments also, okay? Someone asks me what they think of something and they run something by me.
Speaker: I won't shit on it, period. I don't try to make it about negatives. GT, good to see you too, brother. Good to see you. Retired policeman, fun enthusiast, all around great guy.
Speaker: Don't arrest me. As far as I can tell. Thanks for coming back, brother. appreciate you. Thank you very much. Like, share, subscribe. Please and thank you. But i will ah I will try to make the feedback as positive as possible.
Speaker: I don't want to be the reason somebody decides they don't want to do comedy anymore. um Ryan and Michael will know who I'm talking about. There was somebody in the near vicinity who was doing a ah doing it a bit about a child and is described very, very, very well for a long goddamn time. I mean, the longest 90 seconds to two and a half minutes of your life.
Speaker: Just... me really giving you a visual of this little like five-year-old kid's genitalia crowd after crowd after crowd visibly retreat from the description it gets i mean every vein i mean gets described and it's awful and he thought this joke was killing jeff And it was. It was killing crowds, killing the moods in crowds, killing people's kill people's willingness to sit much longer because some people don't have self-awareness.
Speaker: They love it so much. It's their favorite joke. So obviously the crowd loves it.
Speaker: But there's feedback and some people just don't understand it or see it. That's disgusting. I just like I can't. well it wasn't It wasn't full on pedo or anything like that, but it was a very, very, very descriptive.
Speaker: It was pedo. It was pedo adjacent. Good. It was pedo adjacent. yeah but so It was creepy. It was so really creepy.
Speaker: You know what I'm talking about. and You know the joke. i'm sure You both heard it. Yeah. Yeah. yeah unfortunately all he said was hey man what did you think of my set and instead of being negative about it i found the positive thing to say i really liked your energy yeah
Speaker: you're real confident here you're real i want you to i want you know i really think you gotta dump that bit because it's not working i promise you it was no man it kills i love that bit I hear what you're saying about Luke, but it wasn't like that. i'm It was an innocent type of thing. It was just really creepy how focused he was on that description.
Speaker: I think it was awful. this ah but Nobody wants to hear that shit. and I can't agree with you more, but it dawned on me one day and I called him up. I said, Hey man, I found a way to save your bit.
Speaker: Make it your grandpa. Hmm. a that's That's not gross. It's just weird and maybe all uncomfortable. But it's not gross. Not as gross. Who hasn't been to grandma for the weekend and grandpa pops out the shower, no towel or nothing on, walking up two floors and four fucking ah hallways to their bedroom.
Speaker: The older ones did that stuff. it it It helps to be the victim, not the victimizer.
Speaker: on the yeah There was no victim in the joke. What it sounded like. Here's the deal. okay He made himself the butt of the joke by trying to describe this giant veiny hog on a five-year-old.
Speaker: and He's embarrassed that he doesn't have that package. That was the gist of the joke. It was rough because of how much time he spent.
Speaker: Mike, I think you can ah relate to this from from a ah pretty right-leaning crowd of bikers, and you did the gayest joke of all fucking times.
Speaker: Okay. I had a bad night. I was like a bitch. It wasn't working even a little bit. No. But because you wanted me to hear it, you wouldn't jump out of it.
Speaker: no And I've only done it once. so Get up my ass. well If you do it again, make it the ah Folsom County street player. street there ah I'll keep that in mind. if Yeah, if we perform for a so convict, yeah, I'll do that bit.
Speaker: But make sure weird we got good security. because folkss We're great at a pride rally. Yeah. Gay bar.
Speaker: bit ah But that's the thing. like You won't let that go. and and Never will. at least you're not apologizing for it anymore.
Speaker: But. OK, earlier, Mike, you mentioned something about being. Am I funny, funny, water cooler, funny? Am I clown funny? Can i do this or what?
Speaker: Right. So that's the thing. Right. Anybody who says to me, oh, you're a comedian. Cool. People keep telling me I should do that. I give them the same response every single time.
Speaker: got I'm not trying to dissuade you. I'm just going to say this. It's very, very different being funny at a party with your friends or being funny at work with people that know you. Yes. You have to be on stage working you know working with the crowd to make them laugh.
Speaker: Right. Either A, they don't know the people related in your stories that make them funny. Yeah. for the use You've got to be there. Yeah. Yeah, exactly.
Speaker: Hey, what up, Kevin McGee? went to school with him. Sorry, I went to school with him. I haven't seen him in years. I had to say something. I'm sorry. so Thank you. Make sure to like, share, subscribe.
Speaker: Do either one of you run bits currently that you did in your first six months on stage? Yes.
Speaker: not all of them but some of them not all them sure do you still do the sparta one what oh yep he always does it i've i've recently killed don't know it was the first six months because again i don't remember a lot of the earliest stuff but i've recently started to kill karen because i've been doing karen for so long that like it's not getting the laughs I used to be, because I think it's not funny to me anymore.
Speaker: It's like... You just said it too many times. I've just said it so many times. It's just like, meh.
Speaker: I can see that happening. Yeah, i i still I still do the most bit. it was You did that early on? and yeah Yeah. I want to say, give or take,
Speaker: in the sixth month. The Scooby-Doo marijuana bit, I still do. I don't always do it, but I still do it. right And I still do the Trump bit, and that's my clothes are always.
Speaker: Well, that's an easy one for these days. Yeah, but you haven't seen my Trump bit. It's interesting. It's good. it's good it's good In Ohio, you're going to fucking tell it to me. I'll pay you five bucks.
Speaker: You're not going to sell it to Ohio. you're broke, I'll take those five bucks. you know I don't even have five bucks. of ke Let's be real. I'll do it for you free sometime.
Speaker: ah Oh. Is anybody after a show and from the audience, like a participant in the audience, has anyone ever come to you after a show and said something to you that you did not expect to hear, either positive or negative or both?
Speaker: Like something that kind of shocked you at all?
Speaker: That's a yes. So, Michael, you remember, well, I think, Ryan, you may or may not have seen my moose bit. It's been a while. I know, Breton, you've never seen it.
Speaker: But when I do my moose bit, I hump a bar stool. I've had a couple times, like and I do it over the edge, right? yeah I've had a couple of people like, that was sexy.
Speaker: Me humping a bar stool is sexy? who ah Okay. Just give me your fucking number, bitch.
Speaker: And like, once again, like when I do the moose bit, I do the moose bit talking about a moose raping my semi-truck.
Speaker: And not only do I hump a stool, I'll sit there and make a moose rapey. When it comes to that word, I'm not. But it's funny if a moose is not fucking funny at all. Okay. I apologize.
Speaker: I don't know a better way to say it. but if well just You get fucked in the ass without... Settle down, Britt. Settle down. He's our guest. Relax. for job no i don't like that I apologize. I thought it was funny. Don't take it personally.
Speaker: um don't take alic don't take it personally The thing is, streams can get cut for that word Okay. You're not nice monetized yet, but you can get demonetized or stuff like that. Your videos can get struck down. I'm apologizing.
Speaker: Yeah, it's okay. It's okay. You're fine. You're fine. You didn't know. But yeah, we don't use that. just um I thought it was funny and to say it about a moose. Look, to me, hilarious. i don't have a problem with the word, but to the internet does.
Speaker: Okay. So for safety, safety. Well, once again, I apologize. Bulldog in the house. But I'm moose fucking my crook and I'm making sounds of the moose fucking my crook. And he's like, wo for and I have a couple of women get off stage like that. Sexy. It's sexy. Welcome to the party, Bulldog. Welcome to the party. Just some dude. Just some dude is in the hizzy. I don't know who Pierre Oli is, but hi.
Speaker: Thanks for stopping in. Like, subscribe, share. Please and thank you. Ryan, how about you? I've been trying to think of something and i really I really can't think of something that was shocking someone said to do when I got off stage.
Speaker: um I've had people like jokes. I've had people come up and like performances and like jokes where I'm like, oh my god, you were so funny, you were hilarious, and I'm just like,
Speaker: I was dog shit tonight, but I'm glad you liked it. And you're just in your head. You're like, yeah, no, thanks for coming out. Glad you had a good time. And I'm like, yeah, no, that was like, I gave you D grade. Like I gave you a D grade dicking tonight. Like, I'm sorry. Like, like if that was good for you, I feel bad for you. Like I apologize.
Speaker: Can you remember this specific instance you're talking about? What? The D grade performance. I don't keep track all my D-grade performances, baby. i This particular one. he made his first wild This particular one. Why did you feel it was D-grade and why were you surprised anybody liked it?
Speaker: Was it because of the crash response or because of what you thought you were putting out? but one The one thing in particular is a hosting gig. It was an MC gig. and I'm doing my thing. I'm making my usual corny little jokes as I hand out prizes. and I just felt hornball-y all night like i'm just like oh god why do you keep like no like stop it and then i get off stage and they're like dude you were so funny you were great whatever whatever i think i even got tipped that night and i was like i don't deserve this but i'm not giving it back you know right like like i'm looking at the tip like don't know okay no i'm sorry um
Speaker: It is a weird thing. I don't know. I don't know to tell you, but yeah, no, it's just like, sometimes I'd be cheesy and I'm just like, I don't, I don't, I don't, I could have done better. There are about 10 better things. i to say You're just really drunk.
Speaker: You're really drunk. And I'm funny right now. And I'm glad that that happened to you. No, yeah. What I think like sometimes when, okay. Okay.
Speaker: what's the What's the biggest crowd ballpark it within 15, 20 people or something like that? I believe they do, and I'll make sure they drop them in the chat on YouTube for you. um I don't anymore. What's the largest crowd you think you've ever performed for live, in person?
Speaker: Mine's like 150. I think we've sold 154 tickets, and just about every last person showed. Some people got too drunk and ended up not making it into the show, but yeah. uh actual comedy comedy straight comedy i believe the largest crowd was buck 75 200 but the largest crowd i've emceed for was somewhere between three and four hundred i'm strictly there's a reason i'm asking about 175 you said 75 200 yeah okay mike um depending on how many people fill in the funny stuff what do you think how many people you think still the funny stuff
Speaker: That's at least 100, 125 people easy. 100, 100 and a half. yeah Yeah. We'll give it to the down to $1.50, okay? Yeah, at the time I won the funny stop competition, it was packed. So whatever that number is, that.
Speaker: Right. Now, do you think that was easy in that situation to perform or hard? you got Yeah, honestly, it's it's a weird – you as the performer, your nerves are so much higher – You're so much more stressed out. But when there's that many people in the room and Mike, you always say this when there's that many people in a room and they came to laugh and they paid a ticket to laugh, they are primed to laugh.
Speaker: removing it yeah I feel like it would be easier with more people because like my biggest crowd was probably like 30 or 40 people in that range. Probably. i don't know. And the less people that are in there, you have less people laughing. So it doesn't seem as good. You know what I mean? Laughter is contagious.
Speaker: I like, i don't know if you guys ever do this, but I like with the larger crowds and the larger rooms. Yes. I feel like that's why I'm going to kill it on New Year's Eve. Great. um I like fucking with them a little bit. like I get i get like these weird jollies when I'm only getting stuff in the room.
Speaker: right? yeah like And like, I will, I will throw shade on the other side of the room. I was like, you guys are special needs. You don't get this one. I'm over here with my people, right?
Speaker: I won't even look at the side. That's not laughing. So like, I just, I don't know. There's something about like, just getting like a section that loves you. And then like, you know I don't know. It's this one's for you.
Speaker: over here' like I'll come back to the section. It doesn't. And I'd be like, are you guys ready yet? Like, do you, I don't know what to, you know, ah it's just, it's weird. One of the best ones I ever heard from somebody. ah Hey, man, are you having a good time? Yeah, having a great time. why don't you let your fucking face know it?
Speaker: Yeah, you do that. yeah well that's that's That's a Michael Copenhaver heckle. Yeah, like, hey, you in the front. Are you good? You good? Yeah, because you let your face know, and I'm like, I'm like, everybody else is dying, and the guy's like, the guy that you're talking to always thinks you're going to beat his ass.
Speaker: Like, that's that's, everyone else is laughing, and the guy in the front that you're yelling at is like, security. You know, which here's a fun thing. Here's a fun thought for you.
Speaker: ah In that situation, does security help you or the person, right? Like, I've always wondered, like, if you're handing out an ass beating to a crowd member, are they going to, like, help him or are they helping you? Like, what side is the security on?
Speaker: I don't know. I don't believe. I don't believe. For some reason, people find me intimidating and i don't get it. I really don't. Yeah, dude. You need a tattoo. think have that problem. Nobody's going to rush the stage on me. That dude you're talking about, Mike, at that one show, that guy, I had no fear of him. I wasn't worried he was coming up there. He just wanted to make noise.
Speaker: The little dog barks. The big dog acts. Right, but some of the people we met there, they may have chiv or a knife. That's why I didn't say to ignore the situation.
Speaker: Because what was being say was going to be very inciting. very up but Look, dude, I don't handle Hegler's well. I have no problem admitting that. I go nuclear instantly. It's like, oh, fuck you, red button.
Speaker: I totally believe it. He does. He does. Listen, i will when you said when you said that you wanted to run for president and you were talking about how it's only five grand and you were going to make a bid for it,
Speaker: Michael, my first thought was how nuclear you go on hecklers. And I'm like, was like, I hope he makes it, but if he's elected, Putin better shut the fuck up. I'm just telling you, up just put you, could you just imagine Mike with the nuclear codes that keep me in the room going, they said, what?
Speaker: They said, give me the briefcase. I like, I like every last person I meet until they give me a good reason not to. I treat everybody with proper respect.
Speaker: And, uh, Look, if I'm not fucking with you, i don't like you, probably. Imagine someone interrupting President Michael in a press conference. I promise you, it would be like a scene from The Dictator. He would just be like... He wouldn't even say anything. He'd just be like... With Zelensky over there in ah Ukraine, right, becoming president, I i feel I could do it.
Speaker: Especially now that I'm married. You got to have that marriage to be legitimate. yeah But I'm going to respond to this person here, just some dude 13. Dang, only 150 people? That's live and in person. i did ah Mike was there, too. I did a show in Youngstown that was broadcast to over 10,000 viewers.
Speaker: That's a stadium show, basically. an arena. What about Robert? wall opening up Big theater. robert coleman but has alive It was COVID times and it was broadcasts.
Speaker: Oh, so they couldn't come up and try to kick your ass or shiv you. That's right. I'm getting security fund president. It would be my cousin Mike. Nobody fucks with my cousin Mike. Tell him.
Speaker: I said, it what's up? Say hi, bitch. Hello, dude. Santa? He's letting me be the star of the show tonight. Last time he was here, he showed me up.
Speaker: Yeah. He's going to get on stage one of these days. He watched couple of my vids. He's like, man, I could do that. He fucking makes me laugh all the time. This motherfucker's hilarious. He is funny. And he's going to no problem.
Speaker: He's going to have no problem doing the... ah Yeah, I heard you, Jedi. I heard you, buddy. I told them, send me some links to good clips that I can share out to our viewers.
Speaker: Actually... Send me the links. Yeah, yeah. Shoot them into my instant messenger. You guys want to put up one of your best clips, like a five-minute set? We can show that everybody right now. You guys have any interest in that?
Speaker: Ryan and Mike. I don't have any anymore because my fucking ex-fiance deleted them. Here's what I'll do for you. I'll do one. I'm going to do a crazy solid.
Speaker: Do the promo? No, not my promo. I'm going to show you My very first time on stage. Oh, God. I've done this a couple of times, but it was on other shows.
Speaker: Just to give you guys the courage, because I was i taped it on purpose cause i wanted to see it later. I expected to kill. i thought I was to go in there and become a superstar day one. How come I doing i need do this? I should have had a better film. so It didn't go that way.
Speaker: I fell in love with it. so but no I'm not going to do the first because I've done it several times. This is my second time ever on stage. legit second time as a stand-up comedian uh and they're super old they're not ultra cringy but they're not fucking great it's also so for everybody what's up yankees for life what's happening go indians yeah sure
Speaker: We don't call them that anymore. Guys, feel free to comment and roast. That was a great roast.
Speaker: Hey, just some dude. Get it right. That's not how you spell it. about communication Turn it up. Yeah, I can't hear it either.
Speaker: How can I hear? It's all the way up.
Speaker: I'll turn my computer up. Beep, beep, beep, beep, beep. Did it pause? Yes. Did I pause it? Ah, fuck. Ah, shit. doing great. and Sorry, guys. I'm not a tech wizard.
Speaker: back again Okay, see how far I'm holding mic away from my face? and he says five minutes That's why you can't hear it. and mc out of the gate last week starts off so here's what we'll do to peter dinklage from game of i don't know if you heard that but uh that was all real so here's my sixth time now i know how to hold them up you saw how far away from my face the mic was yes yep all right listen to this one
Speaker: Your internet sucks. Yeah. What's it doing? Buffering is wild. Stand by. I'm going to fix this. like if we're going with that.
Speaker: keep going.
Speaker: What a buffer.
Speaker: i like if we're on last me not no keep going no what do you like what a buffer What do you like? Tell us what you like. Go ahead. Oh, when it comes to baseball teams, they're naming them out.
Speaker: I like the banana boys or whatever they're fucking called. The ones that dance and shit.
Speaker: I only like baseball when you go to the actual show. Okay. Really, it is. really isn't But I also want to thank and every of you for coming out to my meteoric rise, the comedy superstar. Which is going to be the worst thing possible for me.
Speaker: Because let's say I do make it. Come on. Let's say I do. going to on the road with young, late, mid-20-somethings, early 30-somethings, and they're going to be wanting that comedy lifestyle, you know that alcohol-driven, cocaine-fueled all night long. Let's do it, do it, do it. And I'm going to die because I'm 45. Somebody might be thinking, ah, 45, that's not so old. Yeah, well, 45's pretty friggin' old. It sucks. I used to know when I was done pinging. Shit. I up. my baby.
Speaker: What, you weren't done being? cality well you weren't done good So it does happen, fantastic. If it doesn't, that's fantastic too. I have a good time doing it and hopefully you all are having a good time while I'm doing it. That's the only thing that really matters to me in the end. While it is competition, I'm not worried about winning and I really have met some really cool people out here that do this thing that I like to do and whoever wins, it's just, it's been a whirlwind for me. This is my for real sixth time ever on stage.
Speaker: wow
Speaker: fun and i enjoy it and that's all that really matters it's not that's what i was saying and if you're not having fun you're definitely doing it wrong a Now, for you young people out there, to avoid what you gotta go through at my age, if you're not doing well for yourself right now, find whatever alley you got to, suck it for some money. You're gonna need money in the future. Because they're gonna come out soon with a longevity bill.
Speaker: And you're gonna want that, so you don't have to go through the stuff that I'm going through. and It's gonna be great. well Some of you are thinking of conspiracy wackos. Oh, they'll never do that, they'll never do that. so They want you to be sick so they get your money.
Speaker: is true that one should be built It's gonna keep you alive longer, but they're still get you with cancer in the end. So they'll they'll still get you there. That's right. Laughs for cancer, you sick suckers.
Speaker: Now, speaking little longer, the government, right, they want you to wear your seatbelts. They don't want you be safe. At least that's what they want you to think. Is that what I'm conspiracy weirdo?
Speaker: What it really is all about is they don't care if you live from a car crash in the end, other than live longer, pay more taxes. That's really all they want in the government. They want you to be like, man, that fell flat as hell. That sucks. That's what happens when you do new stuff. People say, yeah, you should try best five. don't believe in that. Too many people here so hard to see me. I don't want to keep repeating myself. But this is a repeat for one reason and reason only. My man's here. My man, Jeff.
Speaker: Kind got me in some trouble. You didn't even know about a few weeks ago. I was at a bar out of the street with some friends of mine. And then Jeff. Fucking Jeff. And then he walks right by and he goes to He's like, yeah, I didn't say that.
Speaker: He was like, what's up, it man? And he just, so I slapped him, pow, right on the ass. Oh, I love this joke. I didn't know what to do. I
Speaker: That's why I finished PA. I'm an educated person. I have a in secondary education. That's right. I can shave young minds. However,
Speaker: that's when i finished pi by the way i carry myself and my good addiction i'm an educated person i have ambassador street and secondary education and that's right can shapeve young minds good however I do. I do this in school.
Speaker: All my students.
Speaker: faculty money contribution all my students For the whole time I was there, kept telling them they thought I looked like Leonidas from the movie 300. I don't see it. Gerard Butler is a very handsome man and I got this going on.
Speaker: But whatever, I guess it's the bald head, which is another thing that kind always made you feel weird calling guys I'm talking about. DeJohan talked about racism and we all clapped for it. You're sick.
Speaker: When a black guy has this haircut, he's cool and he's stylish. When guy like me has this haircut, I'm a neo-nazin. That's not fair. That's not fair and it's anyway, so they bugged me for the entire time there. Come on, say this is Sparta for Say this is Sparta. So on the last day there, was like, all right, you guys really want to hear it? Oh, yeah, do it, do it, do it.
Speaker: So I gave them what they wanted. and i said, this is Sparta!
Speaker: They did not see
Speaker: An unrelated story. I don't see. Sorry, thank you
Speaker: you. Woo! God, her voice. Should I be the first to cut it up?
Speaker: Yeah. don't remember seeing you perform when you moved around. You actually moved around. That's how I started out.
Speaker: Right. That's how I started. Nervous pace? nervous pace It wasn't nerves. I just, ah I have, I'm a bundle of energy.
Speaker: By my sixth time on stage, I was at home. I was doing what I was born to do.
Speaker: took me once to fall in love with it. Three times to get comfortable with it. And after that, I was just off and running. That was my sixth time ever on stage. It was the semifinals at the funny stop.
Speaker: And looking back, I haven't watched that in so long. ah Two different people. Nell was one, and I can't think of who the other one, maybe it was Spike, or maybe it was Patrick, I'm not sure, said, man, you're definitely going to win. You're definitely gonna win.
Speaker: And I wasn't even thinking like that because I was so new. And I thought I Am Chad was fucking awesome. A couple other really strong performers. Really strong. Like, i didn't I didn't think they were amateurs. Let's put it that way.
Speaker: I was like, what the fuck is this bullshit? This guy's a pro, you know? But I'm just telling you, the reason i went into all that, hey, thanks, everybody, for supporting it, blah, blah, blah.
Speaker: I fucking lost my thought and lost my fucking, like, point. So I just was talking and thanking the crowd, doing anything to get a gratuitous boom to figure it out and go.
Speaker: So that was a mistake that I wish I could take back. No, that's why I didn't win. I know I didn't win. and I don't even care. That's ah a really great experience. Don't get me wrong, but it's not a legit competition.
Speaker: i mean, it is, butism that but isn't. It's true. It is, but isn't. I'm not taking anything away from anyone who wins it. You've got to be funny. That's for sure.
Speaker: but not necessarily the funniest. and i i knew that I don't want to take anything away from anybody. i'd seen gar Everyone I saw win was funny. Very funny. I couldn't get through those videos just because of the laughter, but your promo, I fucking love it. I've watched it so many fucking times. you and I will say like they were saying you were moving around a lot in the first ones, but you you've gotten your still comfort mode, I think.
Speaker: Maybe you just smoked way too much. Well, it did I was going by a stage name way back then when I first started. I was afraid I was going to put too many of my own real thoughts out there because I was writing material. I wasn't telling my stories.
Speaker: What was your fucking stage name? Tell me now. I was little too. you You did hear it I think. It was Obsion. O-B-S-I-A-N.
Speaker: Obsion. It was a character I played in Dungeons & Dragons. I'm nerd. Mewtwo, warm mouth. Rick got a microphone, Wubbie. I hope Michael accidentally shows his search history again. That's funny. Welcome back, Beltloop. I'm sorry.
Speaker: Shaman, welcome back. Hope that wasn't too rough on you guys. But here's the thing, right? That Spartabit was early on, but it has expanded so much.
Speaker: It's a whole like five or so minute chunk that starts way before where I hit it. And it really tells you a lot about me, where I come from and such.
Speaker: That was six times on stage. I was still holding the mic too far away, but it wasn't a packed-ass house, and I was only really talking in first three rows, like the first two sets of tables, three rows, basically.
Speaker: um Can I address the moving around thing? because Yeah, yeah, please do. Yes, you and me have talked, How many nights did I not get any sleep?
Speaker: before work because we would talk route. And one of the things you said was the reason, lest I let's i be mistaken, you were like, everyone, you you got you got all these people chirping. This is what you got to do. this is what you got to do.
Speaker: You got to move around. And you basically was like, fuck good. I'm going to stand here. so So it was weird to me, seeing as how many times I've seen you perform, and you got that.
Speaker: Everyone's being told to move around. Fuck that. I'm going to be the one. Fuck that. Fuck that. so that fuck that Sorry. that He was like, no.
Speaker: that's awesome not you said that brity because that was his attitude's like no Everyone's saying, you got to do this. You got to do that. And this is the thing that me and Michael have in common is, well, yeah, I move around.
Speaker: i He is like, no, fuck. I'm going to be, everyone's telling me do this. And everyone's doing it. Ding, ding, ding, ding. Circle gets square. And that's what he does.
Speaker: And that's what I does. but Everybody's comedy is different. it's like It's the delivery of your jokes. It doesn't matter, really. Right. He has a lot of components to successful stand-up.
Speaker: I have to express something from the chat box. Brittany, you going to take Glick up on his offer and do five minutes on a Saturday night? I'll answer for Brittany. Never. She's not going to do your goddamn internet. Wait, what do they say? Wait, where is that? He wants to know when you're just some dude wants to know when you're going to take Glick up on his offer and do five minutes on Saturday night.
Speaker: She's not going to do that. No, I'm not. She's not your dating monkey. If you wanted to do that, PayPal. out you're not a dancing monkey. you... ongoing are you... you...
Speaker: about Okay, going back to the movement thing on stage or whatever. okay Michael has told me, you know, don't have to do that.
Speaker: But I am an ah expressive person. And it's not because I'm nervous or anything. But it's all, you know, if you can tell your jokes good, it doesn't fucking matter what you're really doing. Yeah.
Speaker: I could be up there and just, like, going like this. And if my jokes are funny, whatever. or if I'm just standing there... And it's still funny and whatever. ah and forgot where was going with that. Sorry, the cat fucked me. The moral of the story is, more of story is um you you're still new to this.
Speaker: in In some ways, it's hard to bring yourself on stage. yourself on stage It's new for the comedy thing, but I've been on stage before. But ultimately, it's like, when you get up there, when you get up there, because I got told bullshit things. I got told bullshit things. this No, don't do this.
Speaker: Do this. Don't do that. Right. These are the rules comedy. There aren't. No. So find yourself. Right. And bring them to the stage.
Speaker: And I will say Michael has helped me out with that a lot. He's like, you do you. Exactly. just like Yeah. yeah When I'm on stage, I'm me.
Speaker: It was hard at first because I didn't have people help me through. And Michael was told the same thing. Move around, move on. And he's like, no, fuck you. And at some point,
Speaker: It's hard at first to get comfortable. It is. But at some point, if at some point, you like, where's the point?
Speaker: I'm going to be mean. I'm going to be mean. He's getting there. on And that's okay. All right. All right. I'm shutting you down, Mike. Sorry, buddy. We're going to go to this.
Speaker: That's fine. That's fine.
Speaker: Ryan's sharing a clip. you've got to stick around. Yeah, well, thank you. and ah Yeah, let me know what you guys think. I'm debating whether I was good or sucked at this show. so We'll let you know.
Speaker: Have at it. <unk> Stick around to hear it. I'm staying. I'm staying, baby. I ain't going nowhere, okay? here's
Speaker: Highlight reel. Boom. This is Ryan Weiss. want Sorry, I'm just muting Doing the comedy. Brittany, don't talk over it.
Speaker: It was good. Yeah. Okay. We're goingnna put a pin in that one. I'm going to move on to something else. Uh, guess what? I'm single. Shocker. Um, I am on every dating site known to men and none.
Speaker: known to women. Don't finish it. There it is. Taking a heck of line. Shut up. Good job, Ryan. You're the sound guy.
Speaker: None known to women. I'm on Hinge, Bumble, Tinder, OkCupid, Grindr, Craigslist, Wait, Grindr? Reddit.
Speaker: There was another one, but that got enough laughs. I'm happy with it. And I've lost. right That's what all the cheering was for when I took the coat off. Um, 280 down to 230. Okay. Nice.
Speaker: Thank you for the beautiful clap. Okay. So, but what happens is when you lose weight, guys start asking stupid fucking questions, right? Like they go like, Hey man, what happened? Like, what did it for you? Why did you finally decide to, you know, get on the treadmill? And I was like, well, let me tell you, okay, you can only wake up from so many sex dreams holding your own fucking titty.
Speaker: There's a hand to tit ratio that I've broken, right? I don't know why I can't stop. Kind of feels good and you guys like it. It's weird.
Speaker: ah Dude, what did you do to lose weight? Like, what's your secret? I'll tell you what my secret is. I fucking don't eat and I work out. Shucker! It's beautiful. I'm on the Slim Fast diet. I'm on the Save-A-Lot diet. I'm on They Took My Food Stamps Away. So now I eat the school lunch diet.
Speaker: Not at all.
Speaker: But I do have a couple tricks. Do you guys want know my tricks to lose some weight? One guy is like, yeah, okay, here's the trick. all right. Don't not buy snacks. Still buy your snacks. Get your Doritos, your Ho-Hos, your Funyuns.
Speaker: Put them in the basement. I have found, not that walking the steps of the basement is some significant weight loss secret, but I'm just lazy enough
Speaker: <unk> not going to Go get the Funyuns out of the basement. Works perfect. You guys like the fat jokes. this is I'm actually kind of hurt. Maybe I should just eat more.
Speaker: It's great. think you should untuck your shirt. Thank you. yeah good My number is 216. but You can find me on Craigslist, Bumble, APL.
Speaker: yeah No, no, no. That's not the list I'm going to be on.
Speaker: I used to date an Asian girl. I miss her. Who?
Speaker: I miss her because she used to be a homie, right? Like, she would tell me when my zipper was down before I went on stage. Some of y'all pulled it down before I came up here. Like, I don't... She was great. She would nag me all the time. um Thank you.
Speaker: Could you get it for No, I'm just kidding. I, uh... I loved her because she would make me take like go places, right? Like, she'd make me adventurous. Like, we would go do fun things and explore the world.
Speaker: um She took 280 pound me to a place called A Thousand Steps. her
Speaker: Do I look like I need to go to a place called A Thousand Steps?
Speaker: Usually there's chuckling here. Y'all are like, yeah, get the treadmill out, fat boy. yeah Come on, tubby. I'll tell you, there weren't a thousand steps, okay?
Speaker: Because on the way down, it was beautiful. But on the way back up, I fucking can counted. One, two, three, four, five, six, five,
Speaker: Oh God, it's just the first landing. What's really fun about a thousand steps is we were down at the beach. Okay. The beach is at the bottom of the steps. It's how they get you to go down 382 stairs.
Speaker: There's ice cream and a beach down there. but but It's a fat people trap. Yeah. first It's crap.
Speaker: and having the ice cream at the beach and having a gale time we're in the ocean now i'm from ohio okay I thought the ocean had chill. The ocean has no chill, okay?
Speaker: Here we are, frolicking, me and my kid, the Asians filming for some reason. I think she knows what's about to happen. yeah We're in the waves, they're knee high. This is fun. They're waist high. Oh, this is cool.
Speaker: They're up to my belly button. I'm getting washed out to sea. I'm going down, the kid's down. I'm pushing her up the beach. I'm like, save the child, get the baby. I look at this woman.
Speaker: Who loves me the love of my she's laughing her ass off and filming and she's yelling at me pull up your pants That's the closer I got nothing else
Speaker: All right elison finished oh Well, one second if you guys like the video his favorite leave us these videos take a long time to I want to guess what built Luke 29. Yeah. We want to hear this. Come on, Mikey. In the late 2000s, people viewed.
Speaker: Yeah. All right. Why Shark Tank sucks now, baby?
Speaker: Yeah, yeah. You got Mike's sign-up approval. I liked it. I laughed a few times. And I was there that night. You were using my mic. Yeah, you were there. You laughed a couple times. The best part, and this is not...
Speaker: Mikey, your highlight reel is next, by the way. I've got it edited. I'm going to be putting that up next. but Yeah, yeah. But i'm putting I'm putting subtitles on when the crowd says something funny. And my sister literally goes, I'll pull your zipper up for you. And I was about to go, that's my sister.
Speaker: Wow. Yeah, well, sorry. not prevent the danger I it. was good. It was good. I liked it. I dug it.
Speaker: Next time, untuck your shirt. Yeah. Room full of all my family and friends. Nobody let me know that that was happening. Thanks, guys. I feel gypped on that particular show.
Speaker: I think I was duped and you fucking railroaded me. Why? It was supposed to be clean. You said it was a clean show. No filth. You were filthy.
Speaker: You were saying the awkward a bunch of times. Sex talk stuff. Listen, I tell you guys it's a clean show every time, and then i'm i'm I'm amazed at what people pass for a clean show.
Speaker: I didn't think I was dirty, but I'll go look. I'll go look if you ah don' go watch the whole thing. I'm sorry. yeah' michael' saving shit For the Year's Eve show, I was wondering, like can I cuss? Can I say something dirty? Because a lot of my bits have talking about shitting.
Speaker: and it's it's it's it's it's the same It's the same rules as other things. It's your first time, okay? It's all right. You can cuss. You can scream. Whatever you got to do, it's your first time, okay? I'm seven hours away from that place, so I don't have to see those people ever again. don't have to see them again. That actually helps.
Speaker: Yeah, Meadows, where's your clip? Meadows, come on, where's your clip? Before we play it, though I want to address the chat room. Bellum says, something's only one in comedy, and that's to be funny. That's definitely the number one rule, in my opinion, number one rule. But how about be original?
Speaker: ah to that's what i'm going to bring up and number three which you shouldn't even have to say how about don't steal you can't steal yes you can't steal can't reword it if you have a similar situation sometimes but don't steal ryan belt loop from the chest throwing you some tags okay you real estate listing may be funny there Hold on, Mike. I want to read some chats real quick. Go ahead.
Speaker: When you're listening to dating apps, include some magazines that list properties. what is your What is y'all's opinion on the Kill Tony show? I fucking hate it. Never heard of it. I've only seen clips, so I can't give a good opinion. So far, I like it, but I've only seen like the clips that are going around. It depends on who he has on his show.
Speaker: Lazy Jedi's a fan. Hashtag Ryan. Eargasm comedy. Go subscribe, brother. the ah The videos that I've played before, the Santa one and some others I know you've seen, Jedi, that's the gentleman I worked with on those. He was actually the impetus of it all happening. it weren't for him, none of us that did those would have ever been come together.
Speaker: In fact, I owe it to you for my headliner, Ryan. I got Robert Coleman, the 2025 World Series of Comedy Champion, coming to headline my New Year's Eve show.
Speaker: He's great. He's amazing. If you guys haven't seen Coleman, he's well worth the ticket. You should definitely see him now. While the tickets are still cheap, i believe hold on I believe the New Year's Eve show that Mikey is hosting is literally only $20. You can get a VIP meeting greet for like 50 bucks.
Speaker: And hang out with us. Well, you guys are cool, but Rob Coleman just yeah won the World Series of Padme. Like literally, technically, he is the funniest comedian in all of America right now. So, This show is going to be amazing. You can get your tickets. Where can they get their tickets, Mikey?
Speaker: Right here. It's up on the thing. If you can read that. I can't read it. Hold on. Tickets are in more detail. It's on my Facebook. it's It's on the Nonsensical Network's Facebook.
Speaker: so mine Oh, you've got a number you can call. Call 330-240-6994 for a great time at the beautiful Underground Lounge. You said it in the wrong order for a great time call.
Speaker: I was not compensated. I was not compensated in any way, shape, or form for this promotion. And ah yeah, go check the And you won't be. Yeah. ah The reason I hate Kill Tony is I just think that depending on your your level, like now I would have no problem getting laughs in one minute.
Speaker: I know exactly what I would do to get fast, quick laughs and be done and watch it. But that is because I've been doing this shit for years. I'm excited to meet Rob. If you're months in, one minute is tough to get there with your fucking pow, pow, pow.
Speaker: And they shit all over these guys for it. And it's just not right. i don't I wouldn't want to be the reason. That's why I try to keep it positive. I try to find something positive. liked your energy. I'd rather say that than, well, it wasn't funny at all. What the fuck are you even doing up there?
Speaker: Why are you so nervous? If you want to be here, why do you seem like you don't belong up there? What the fuck is wrong with you? I can't say that to somebody make them want to quit, perhaps. i'm not I'm not that person. I don't want to be like that. I will say I am kind of nervous just because of Rob Coleman being the winner and everything. That's like, and that puts whole lot of- Let me just tell you right now, Rob Coleman is one those down to earth, regular everyday dudes you're ever going to meet. Super nice, super funny, super personable.
Speaker: You're going to love Rob. Everybody that I know that knows Rob loves Rob. Rob's awesome. Yeah, I've watched a lot of his videos. He's really funny. He is good. i'm I'm very excited. Drop channel in there, Beltloop, for me. Drop your channel on your stream, man. Because I want to join you guys one night.
Speaker: Don't steal others' jokes. That's right. Don't Carlos Mencia. That's right. but Jedi says, drop links. Make my life easier. i will do that. I'll share the links with you, Jedi.
Speaker: Drop the phone number for that. What town is this in? It is in the big city of Warren, Ohio. i don't know where you're at, Beltloop, but I'm about 50 miles due east of Cleveland.
Speaker: It's at a hotel-like lounge in the in the underground area in the lounge. There's a hotel above. Come out get wrecked, and do that noise. I am driving myself this time.
Speaker: I mean, again, as a comedian, I don't like it because it's just, again, I'm not the type to want to rip on somebody in a mean way. I'll do it in a fun way. Like when I talking with Ryan. I know Ryan. I love Ryan. I know Mike. I love Mike. I'll bust their balls.
Speaker: But I'm not going to make them feel bad. They know me. Some stranger, I'm not going to shit all over their their act because, man, I came up early. I know what it's like beginning.
Speaker: Yeah. Call now. Call now. Michael, call now. They're going to answer it live. We will sext you live right now on the air. I will. I will make bird noises or whatever you're into, you three little freaks.
Speaker: We'll whip it out, right? andin't let him freak You can whip it out. That's the premium content. I thought you were going to whip it out. I'm going to whip it out, but you got to whip it out first. We got to tag team the whip out.
Speaker: mike Mississippi, yeah, you're about 13-hour drive away, but it would be worth it. 13 hours? Hey, where the hell are you doing that? yes yeah Mississippi, that's like a two-hour flight and well worth it.
Speaker: I'm telling you, you there'll there'll be a seedy hotel somewhere nearby that we will put you in. It's literally in a hotel. Yeah. that know The other guy was in the hotel.
Speaker: I did not lie. i did not lie. There is a seedy hotel nearby that we will get you a room in if you come from Mississippi. You want me to come in a seedy hotel?
Speaker: yeah what I'm driving my van if I'm sleeping in the van. don't trust y'all. um've I've been alone with Michael. goal I don't trust him. yeah do but I'm still trying to figure out if I'm staying at Michael and Sue's house or if I'm going to be staying at the hotel.
Speaker: You're welcome to stay here. Hands of Seeds wants to know what normal job would produce the best comedians. I say salesman.
Speaker: Sales guys do well. ah there's There's quite a few sales guys that are comics. um I think nurses. Yeah. They have that sense of humor.
Speaker: Well, it's like and it's dark, too. Yeah, they have to. And cops as well. They see some fucked up shit. They have to find ways to cope with the fucked up shit they deal with.
Speaker: But not everybody likes dark comedy. Right, right. right
Speaker: like Some people like the slap whatever majiggy. Slapstick. I was going to say slap shot. yeah What kind of porn are you watching?
Speaker: yeah that's just that I used to think that there okay somebody who told me early in that there's no such thing as a 100% joke. right Bullshit, bullshit. Funny is funny. Period. yes but It doesn't bomb, but not everybody loves the Sparta thing.
Speaker: right if In a predominantly African-American crowd, I generally would slay top to bottom. But that one thing, the i don't know if it's the flamboyancy or what, they don't love that joke.
Speaker: Yeah, like when I was in Baltimore, the African-American community, when I did not stand up, but open mic things, they liked my dark humor. That's for sure. But yeah, so not for everybody.
Speaker: Well, again, there's so many ways to skin that comedy cat. There's so many different ways to deliver. And I figure it out eventually. With all y'all's help, my mentors.
Speaker: You've really got a lot of potential. and I'm really looking forward to it. Mike, they're screaming for a link for one of your sets, buddy. Who, me? Yes. I've been too busy talking.
Speaker: All my links were stolen off laptop. Yeah. And every time I try to find it, then I hear you go. Mike, I got to interrupt you, buddy. I'm sorry. Ryan's got to do some early morning shit.
Speaker: I want to thank you, Ryan, for coming out on the show. One more time, everybody. Eargasm comedy. Go like, subscribe, and share that shit. A lot of videos in there. Check out the video section. You'll see me and some of my very funny friends doing some crazy fucking shit. What Goes In Your Butt was a pretty weird one.
Speaker: ah Naughty Santa was a lot of fun. I love that one. Yeah, there's some really funny shit in there. Go check us out. Please, and thank you. Ryan, I appreciate your time, man. Thank you very much. Nice to have you guys. It's been a while.
Speaker: Yeah, we're Eargasm Comics. be bringing back the Light Em Up comedy contest contest. It'll be every two-ish weeks at Real Smoked Barbecue in beautiful Ohio City, of of Ohio, which is you know Cleveland, for those of you that are matt mathematically challenged.
Speaker: So come on out. We're going to crown the winning comic every week. They're going to get $50. You, the crowd, decide who wins. It's kind of fun. We give these big old glow sticks, and if you don't like the comic, you like them, and they get real feedback live that they're not doing well, and then we pull them off stage and bring up the next one. So funniest comic wins. Comics you can enter by emailing eargasmcomedy at gmail.com if you'd like to be on the next one, which I believe i always had my calendar up. Brother, before you take off, don't you throw that in the chat room?
Speaker: I don't have a link and all that yet, but the next one's going to be ah December 28th, the Sunday after Christmas, will be our last comedy show of the year. So you just take a yep you get your tickets on Eventbrite. That'll be up probably this weekend. and comics, email me if you want to perform.
Speaker: Ryan, Ryan, Ryan, before you go, can I ask you a personal favor? Can I do a guest set up there to tune up for New Year's Eve? Yeah, always. Awesome. You're the man. Thanks again, brother. Appreciate you. The chat loved you.
Speaker: Great set. I loved it. It was fun. Be well, be safe. Friend of the show. Love you, brother. Bye, chat. Meadow, send the link. I want to see your video. Sorry, guys. So does Jedi. Wait, wasn't it? You didn't put farts where the butthole is?
Speaker: Yeah. It bugs me because he used the wrong of there. we Grammar Nazi. but if you're going to sell about whites If you're going to talk about use the right grammar.
Speaker: yes that was rep you grammar nazi lazy i'm disappointed in you ah Talk about buttholes right.
Speaker: Use buttholes and grammar right, dude.
Speaker: You've never sent me a video of your shit ever, huh? I'm like, I've got to have one somewhere. lay I'm a good comedian, but a terrible self-promoter. We've had this talk.
Speaker: I'm a terrible self-promoter. you know Like I said, I had videos, but the laptop got stolen. So the only video of me performing captivity was when I won the funny stop.
Speaker: But you can't hear it right. His fucking feet is talking in the background. So you can't really hear me so well.
Speaker: So yeah, i'm i'm I'm funny, but I don't have proof of it. No, you do. You've been funny all night, dude. Come on. Thank you. Great.
Speaker: ah I want to answer Hands of C's question. I don't think I did properly, maybe. I don't think that there's a particular job that makes you better suited to do comedy. It's more than what you need to get through work.
Speaker: I'm a piece of person, and that's why I do it the way I do it. When I was wandering all over the stage and stuff, That was me writing material and not really telling my stories. Except for Florida. That was a real thing that happened.
Speaker: I can't remember what else I was talking about in that clip, but I was writing those jokes before I was really just talking about me and being me. I was going by that so pseudonym too, right?
Speaker: When I started telling my stories, I did it just like I would at any place else. I put that mic in the stand and stood there. I needed my hands sometimes to talk and gesticulate. Right. i was my most genuine self at that point not walking around because i'm not a walk around nervous kind of guy back then it was this energy like man i just want to do this and be good at it not that i was afraid the first couple of times i mean that wasn't afraid ever but it was not stressful either it's just uh those first three times just got rough because i kept looking up at the lights and for some reason it just made me like i was looking at that thing in the
Speaker: men in black right just wiped my mind well you like switched up the joke like reworded it from that video to your promo yes i'm saying six times on stage my promo was six months in comedy yeah and that was my third time i think my third time through that or no second time through that funny sandwich green in ohio contest yeah don't know it was so funny but also but also like you have You have a bit starting off. and like well It's working, but it's not working enough. and You get in your head you start thinking and you find ways to make it better. so When you see it for the first time, it's not as good as the finished product because it was a finished product. got to refine it.
Speaker: you What makes it better? You'll find that.
Speaker: You'll find that. You'll have... like you'll have Like there there's times where I've thought, okay, this bit is perfect. No fat.
Speaker: It's perfect. But sometimes at least with me and I'm sure with Michael, you sit there, whatever you do, when you start thinking about it, you, you see yourself perform, you see yourself perform.
Speaker: And you watch it over and over again. And all of a sudden it's like, wait a minute. thought it was perfect. i thought it was perfect. Now it's better. i can add this onto it. It's better. I thought it was done.
Speaker: Done. Done. Doesn't need any work. Perfect. Move on to the next. But sometimes you sit there and watch yourself in your head and like, wait a minute, this can make it even better. And that happens to everybody.
Speaker: know That Sparta bit started the way it was. i mean That was, I think, the second time I ever told it. ah It went from that, like I said, to an entire five-minute bit that's totally different.
Speaker: I mean, it's the same basic thing, but it's got so much more meat to it, and it's all... You know, more or less true. Like i said, I don't tell a lot of jokes. I just tell stories out of my life. I am the professional idiot. I made a career out of bad decisions.
Speaker: right People seem to like to laugh at me. And something that Beltloop was saying, he's he's got stories and shit that are kind of fucked up or whatever. But they're laughing at him rather than with him.
Speaker: right and there's nothing wrong with that a lot of my stories you're laughing at me because i'm just fine doing something stupid or it's like look i lived through it and i tell everybody i'm immune to embarrassment i don't care i'll tell you all these fuck up stories uh where'd that go what comedians do you find funny that everyone else does gabriel iglesias never laughed at anything he did He's successful, but I don't, I've never found one single thing. Gabriel Iglesias.
Speaker: cooperative believe Never found him remotely funny. Not even the racist gift baskets skit, is that a sketch or story?
Speaker: I've never about the original thing. Not a single thing. Have you ever heard racist gift basket story? tell Don't recall it. Like every, I try to watch them.
Speaker: who I like to make people laugh and I want laugh too. So I want to watch him and be entertained, but I've literally never found like, I watch him like, that's not funny. What?
Speaker: That's not funny. But I'm also a contrarian, but I've never found a goddamn thing he said to be funny. Not a guy. It doesn't resonate with you. it doesn't resonate with you. It is what it is.
Speaker: It doesn't mean it's not funny, it just doesn't work for you. Right, right. strokes For different folks. Exactly. And I agree with that. Yes, I don't find him funny, but I'm not going to shit on him because he's making other people laugh. So hey, do you, bud. Do you. i don't find you funny, but you're making other people laugh.
Speaker: So I'm going to shit on him, but I just don't find him funny, but other people do. Thank you, Belle, Luke. You have a great week as well. Still got your ears on?
Speaker: What are you talking on CBs? Come back at me big brother. Brittany who do you find? 10 niner. Brittany who do you find not funny but everyone else does? the
Speaker: Sometimes people are going to hate me for this. Sometimes Williams. He makes me sweat just watching him.
Speaker: it ah Is that what it is? is his His nervous energy? or like He's always just like dripping in sweat and that's all I can focus on. Okay.
Speaker: That was an honest answer. um And then some of his jokes. I get the fluffy thing because some of his things don't land. but i all I mean, he does a lot of ah voices.
Speaker: What are they?
Speaker: Noises, voices. Voices like, you know Impressions erects Thank you yeah I do a lot of impressions See, my problem with My problem with Fluffy is like I feel like it's too formulaic.
Speaker: Hey, I'm fat and Mexican. skin And these people said this because I'm fat Mexican. And I said this because I'm fat Mexican. It's too formulaic. Nate Jackson has kind of gotten on my nerves lately, too.
Speaker: so i don't this he's a He does crowd work most of the time. He has Netflix and whatever. He's big. He's funny, but it's just become...
Speaker: but Not like Matt Rafe, but he's become very repetitive. And it's kind of annoying. And like the answers that the people in the crowd tell him are repetitive. So it's just like I get bored. Ah.
Speaker: But some sometimes ah with us as comedians, which I did this before I was good a comedian. Like...
Speaker: Damn it. Sorry. Mind fart. Mind fart. Close your eyes and think. and Don't do that to me. But it's like, like even before were comedians...
Speaker: oh we so we see My mind just went somewhere else. I think it's where you were saying what you were saying. was Sorry. yeah I'm a pervert big time. That's right. we We all are. but it's like As comedians, some even before we were comedians, we want to laugh, at the same time, we pick shit apart a little too much.
Speaker: Yeah, no, I get that for sure. yeah And I do that with movies. I'll watch a movie and like, plot fail, plot fail. Fuck, that's my favorite movie of all time, but I'm picking up plot fails.
Speaker: And yet, I feel like we do it with comics. i always worked Yeah, that's funny, but... It could be funnier. it It's really, dude? Really? You went with a cheap joke? Come on.
Speaker: Come on. Ralphie Mae. You don't like Ralphie Mae? No, he says he did. Mrs. Ralphie Mae.
Speaker: Oh. Well, let's see. Brittany said Cat Williams. ah I wouldn't thought of him because I don't like we'll think of him. i He's another one. I mean, as a character actor, I think he's better in movies than he is on stage, personally. It gets too political.
Speaker: Let's be honest. when When comics get too political, it's like looking really Like have a whole agenda to their jokes. yes it Yes. It's like you'll you'll get a comedian that'll have a good special. life Yeah, they're good. They're funny. Then the next one, oh, I made it so I can just get up here and espouse my belief. I don't feel like a lot of them make it about race and shit like that. like Why do you have
Speaker: to do that. It makes it like, I don't care. it's fine. But like they make it. But it's gotta be funny. Right. It's almost more like a seminar than a fucking standup. It's like, did you got what?
Speaker: And I agree with that. it' was like, yeah, you were funny. And now it's like, okay, I made it. I had a funny special. Let me get up and talk about all my beliefs. I don't remember who said it, but somebody, the quote is, the biggest problem a comedian can ever have is becoming a philosopher.
Speaker: Everybody loves a philosopher. Wow. And it was great. And then his last two specials, he was making his points into but what should be your points.
Speaker: There was way too much stuffing and not enough punchline for five minutes of stuffing. Right. Who was this? It was true, but not funny, true. Like the the whole political stuff he used to do.
Speaker: i Like Carlin doing it again in the 80s, man. Carlin at Carnegie. Talking about Bush. His name was George Boner, right? That shit was great. But in the it was just like he was depressing almost to listen to. Yes.
Speaker: Yes, thank you. real world really is, which is shit. What what what what upset me about that was Carlin always had this belief that question everything.
Speaker: Even what I say, question everything. But at the end, he was like, no, I'm right. Listen to what I say. It was so antithetical. It was so antithetical. He became what he hated.
Speaker: He literally became what he hated. Good night, Bulldogs. Thanks for the watch. Don't forget to like, subscribe, and share, brother. Bulldog. Bulldog.
Speaker: Bulldog. Ass. Ass. Sorry. Who else that gets a lot of hype but doesn't live up to it? I personally, currently, Bill Burr was way better 15 years ago.
Speaker: Yes. He was, but I think he's still good. Not as good as he was. It just seems to be the same theme over and over and over again with him. Gold digging horse. Gold digging horse. Gold digging horse. yeah and on the We need to kill more people.
Speaker: You drift away from that. That was the best shit. That's not even funny. That's just true. Right. but He does it every special. I get what you're saying. I still enjoy him.
Speaker: Is it as good as it was? No. I believe this is a comment about Carlin. not Bill Burr. I like that. Carlin had a way of talking about serious, serious topics in a very funny way.
Speaker: Like he had a he had a joke. ah If I was naming it, I would call it the R word can be funny. And he makes a case where it is freaking hilarious.
Speaker: For all the wrong, right reasons. Does that make sense? oh Strangely, yes. because we're all you know It was a different climate. but shit That was probably 25 years ago, at least.
Speaker: Let me get my strap on, then you guys will fuck around and find out. night I don't want to get into it, get into it but after the after the show, Britt, I want to talk to you backstage about something. Don't forget that comment. all right Don't forget that comment.
Speaker: ah
Speaker: Don't forget. They don't call me Butt Plug Britney for no reason. Oh, yeah. I'm a man for the
Speaker: There's some people I like, but there's nobody really that I could watch an old hour just laugh all the way through. Almost never. Right? And there's a lot of people getting, i don't know what the fuck it is. There's a lot of people getting specials and like, what the fuck? I would blow your doors off.
Speaker: Fuck, did you get special? Who the fuck? The funniest person doesn't always get the best opportunities. That is true. ah People paid money for that shit. so And I want to publicly come out and give Matt Rife an apology. I've been talking trash on how unfunny he is forever.
Speaker: He's actually pretty. It's because I thought he just came out of nowhere and just broke out on Wildin' Out. I actually saw a documentary, a little YouTube doc about... um Matt Reif, and it made me respect him a lot more.
Speaker: He's been doing stand-up since he was 14 years old. yeah He went on stage at 14. jesus He just got lucky and sort of hooked up with a couple of the right people early, and he's kind of been able to float and get opportunities he, I won't say doesn't deserve,
Speaker: But I thought he just came out of nowhere and because he was handsome and sort of funny and um with those clips and like the TikTok culture and shit. He didn't earn that shit. No. He's put the work in. He's been doing that shit 15 plus years. I'm sorry, Matt Reif.
Speaker: I know you're listening. We know you're here, boy. opinion on Matt Reif is his artwork is stellar. Oh, for sure. He's quick.
Speaker: It seems like he is. I'm telling you right now, he's practiced. He's super, super, super, super. Well, it's like Blaustein, whatever the fuck his first name is.
Speaker: Crowd work on point, but I think his actual stand-up is just not that good. I forget his first name. his name all Michael Blaustein. He does some stuff with Matt Reif as well.
Speaker: And some other dude. third're They both do crowd work and they'll be on stage together like fucking with people. Yeah. doing jokes back and forth with each other and the crowd. It's funny as shit.
Speaker: One of my best things I do at live shows with certain other comedians I've worked with a lot, I call it Tales from the Road. We all go up at the end, sit together, and just tell stories about hanging out together and being on the road together. and just Yeah, you've been on that afternoon and it's Yeah, you weren't expecting it.
Speaker: Nobody was. It just came out of the middle. was you know what? You guys are having a great time, right? They're like, yeah. You want to hear some more? Yeah. So I called. up It was Spike and Will and I. We did it for the first time ever. We've traveled a lot together. done several states, many, many miles, and hung out a lot.
Speaker: Did a lot of shows together. And we just saw some fucked up shit and had some fucked up experiences. And we have really funny stories that all three of us can tell from our perspectives. And we you know we know each other well enough. We just share the mic and shit. It's like everybody got their own mic. we We're going to break in and put our two cents in. its really fucking It's really fucking good. People have told me, I've seen a lot of comedy, and it's the funniest shit I've ever seen in my life.
Speaker: I don't think I would go that far. But it's all real. good All real, all genuine. And again, we have rapport. or We've known each other for years. We've gone up a lot. Good night, Jedi. Sorry I bored you. Good Jedi.
Speaker: when i do I'll do what I can to get you to see Meadows comedy.
Speaker: have to do the wave for him. He just wants to see you fuck a bar stool. Oh.
Speaker: I have one right here. oh Oh, don't worry. I've got another bit with a bar stool. Hey, if you're that desperate, I can let you borrow my sister with no legs.
Speaker: What fuck am I talking to? yeah Does yeah she leave a snail trail when she walks? What? it I don't leave snail trails.
Speaker: No. the like I make other women leave snail trails, but I don't leave them. I was asking about his sister. He said other women, suggesting he might be a woman. Diane.
Speaker: I mean, if that's what you identify as, that's fine. 2025. 2025. twenty twenty five Hey, Jedi, before you take off, stick around for one more second. Stick around for one more second.
Speaker: He says, hashtag barstools rescinding. Mike, what are the chances I can get you just for the Jedi? Tell your move story real quick. Can you do it? Would you be willing? don't have the tool it doesn't the physicality.
Speaker: that got schedule good You got your couch No it's part story And part the physicality If you don't him humping the stool it doesn't work You can hump a lot of things That's what you said no I tried Jedi Niggity Okay um So do you want me to walk Does Jedi want me to walk him through it Without seeing the physicality Which makes it work right Stop dropping your phone
Speaker: Put yourself in frame. here the bit Dude, we can't even see you. Your camera's off. No, it's not off. i went by i'm correct michaels is dude I'm still fucking head cold as fuck and I'm blowing a lot. and i'm fucking I just don't want to be seen. I look like crap. I feel like crap.
Speaker: same toolss are for Yeah, I did too. I sent you text. so good You, Michael. we There's three of Michael's here.
Speaker: Michael Copenhaver, I sent you text. I'm Mike. I'm not Michael. That's too formal for me. I'm not. That asshole. I love that asshole. Well, not your asshole.
Speaker: I love you. know know asshole blowing a lot That's right, Jedi. He's blowing a lot of not doing the goddamn bit. On that note, since he doesn't want to perform for you, do you got anything you want to plug, Mike? Any any bits or any set shows coming up?
Speaker: No, I don't.
Speaker: I've been going through a lot of shit. So I'm not going recognize that. It's going to be depressing. Lots of prayers, bro. Same to you. To you.
Speaker: but it Yeah, like I said, I feel like shit. I think I'm going to put it up, fucking stick in this pig and shut it down. As Jedi goes, so does Michael. I'm calling it a show.
Speaker: Thank you, Mike, for coming out tonight. i appreciate your time, brother. Thank you for having me, even though it was impromptu. I didn't know what the fuck was going on. I just wanted him to message you, dick. But it was still fun. Nice to meet you, Brittany. As for you, Jedi. As-salamu alaykum.
Speaker: as for you did i asla molaum or whatever the fuck. Mike says goodnight Any closing words? Thanks, Wally. Good to see you buddy. Thanks for popping through. Bye. Thanks for coming through, man. yeah shas Yeah. were tell lot other Nice meeting you, Brittany.
Speaker: Feel free to message me. Me and Michael can both give you fucking comedy advice. I can tell you things he can't tell you. He can tell you things I can't tell you. But I won't show you things you don't want to see. That's the difference.
Speaker: Oh, I know that. just fuck show with the gayest fucking bit ever. You did not just fucking go there, Michael. Oh, my God. That was fucked. well it's I'll do it again sometime. We'll just have to find the right gig.
Speaker: Yeah. You're going to show up to this show on New Year's Eve, correct? Was I just in invited? Was I? Was I just invited? 20 bucks. 20 bucks. We'll talk about it. Okay. now you like it of course Awesome. you. Yeah.
Speaker: ah yeah you keep it Appreciate you. Yeah, send me a friend request, Brittany. Now I'm going to close the show, Mike, so shut your fucking face.
Speaker: Fuck you. I still twenty minutes i still got 20 minutes. Remember that line? Any final words there, Britt? you see Bye. Appreciate you're hanging out, watching, like, share, subscribe.
Speaker: Tell people how much you love us. Tell people how much you hate us. We don't care. No publicity is bad publicity. If you're not having fun, you're not doing it right. So stay right there. Here you go.
Speaker: I got married five weeks ago today to that fantastic punky North Carolina. I don't trust your judgment, but this song goes out to my lady. If I had a hammer, I'd build a house, sweetie.
Speaker: If I had a sailor ship, I'd take a trip.
Speaker: If I had the poet's hand, I'd write a verse, it would be. If I had the faintest touch on canvas, you would be.
Speaker: But I don't have a hand, and I don't have ship. So I can't build you a house, and I cannot take the trip.
Speaker: I'll never have a poet's name. Never will I have the painter's grace. Nor I will not write your verse, will I moralize your face.
Speaker: And also, you almost certainly may.
Speaker: Thank you for making my wish back.
