Nonsensical Nonsense: Holiday Tom foolery

Transcript

Speaker: For my

Speaker: vengeance, I got lost in depression.

Speaker: What is going on? Happy Saturday, motherfuckers!

Speaker: Oh, man. It's been a long, long, long, long day. but but what's going on hopefully y'all are having a good week you've had a good week you're enjoying your weekend whatever you hear that that's just such a such a sweet sound a beautiful sound much much needed

Speaker: ah much much needed

Speaker: ah Any whoosies, what's going on y'all? Welcome to Nonsensical Nonsense. You know me, I'm Glick. Oh man, it's been a hot minute. I haven't seen you guys since last Sunday, so forgive me. I've been sick all week, man.

Speaker: I have not had the energy to do anything. Still don't have the energy to do much of anything. But nonetheless, it's Saturday night. We're going have a good time. And if you're not already, ahead and check us out everywhere.

Speaker: bio.link slash nonsensicalnetwork. That's got all of our links to our Facebook, our Instagram, our X and TikTok, YouTube, where shows are live pretty much every day of the week, man. Everybody's been everybody's been kicking on on all cylinders, so to say.

Speaker: So we got shows live all the time on the the YouTube, Facebook, and Twitch. And don't forget, we are on all your podcasting platforms as well.

Speaker: So you can listen anytime, anyplace. Simply go to the Nonsensical Network or bio.link slash Nonsensical Network. Like, share, and subscribe, bitches.

Speaker: We'd greatly appreciate that. We are getting closer and closer to our 500 mark on the old YouTubes.

Speaker: And as always, don't forget. Nine out ten grannies. Well, they do approve. They love our shit. And the other one, unfortunately, she's no longer with us.

Speaker: But nonetheless. Sorry for the late start, guys. We were out all day. We got up this morning. And I've got get my camera situated.

Speaker: There we go. We was out all day. We got up this morning. And we hit the road, man. And we've been out Christmas shopping all day long.

Speaker: So it is the season, so to say. um i know some people may or may not have been in the comments talking shit. Well, one of the great perks about being the boss of the network and being the creator of the network is for my show, I say seven-ish. That gives me between 7 o'clock and 7.59 before late.

Speaker: before i'm late Seven-ish, baby. So I do what I want. Speaking of the chatter's box, Brit T-T-T-T-T-T-N-E, A-N-Y, double T's.

Speaker: What up, just some random dude? What up, James? Is it yo? Is this yoga night? ah You might have should have turned in tuned into the lazy Jedi shaman night. I hear they do a lot of weird they They call it yoga a little game for me

Speaker: You like that logic? Hey, it's good to be the boss, man. It's it's good to make the rules. I'm just saying. I cover my arse by saying seven-ish because I never know what's going on. and Like I said, today we was out Christmas shopping.

Speaker: I am pretty much done. just got to get Kayla taken care of. and Once I get Kayla taken care of, then I'm done. I think she's she's done. So... so which is ah Which is huge because usually my ass is waiting until Christmas Eve.

Speaker: And boom. Now let's go Christmas shopping and lose our minds. hang pong My back door is dunging. Oh, God. Back door invasion.

Speaker: Got to get some pillowsing up penicillin for this rash. Penicillin? What up, doe? What up, doe? We got Wally coming in here too. Let's go. Jesus Christ.

Speaker: yeah could that worry This is probably what it's like to get a bad case of gonociphilitis. I don't know. only it would know What's up, Bubba? Sir Reginald Wallace III. that real? Is that real?

Speaker: sir rad writtenney sure sir reginald wallace the third is that that real is that real Yes. Yeah, while he was knighted.

Speaker: That's freaking awesome, dude. ah He was knighted by the Duchess of Dorkshire. Probably with a lightsaber. Yeah. too I love Jedi's pink tutu, James. Don't mock it.

Speaker: What's up, James? ah What's going on with you guys? What's up? How's everybody been? we obviously We're here. doe So we're here. Well, I appreciate you being well.

Speaker: You're here. Did you do anything Wednesday night, Britt? I see Michael. No. Michael had some things to deal with with his mom.

Speaker: And then my godmother passed away. So we were both just... Oh, shit. Well, I'm sorry to hear about that. Yeah. I won't give you too much shit. that I was going fuck with you, but I won't now.

Speaker: Yeah. So we just decided like we weren't in in it. and yeah Oh, man. I'd have talked to you about that. but No, you're good. always If you guys don't do a show, you don't do a show. I don't care.

Speaker: I mean, look at Glick. He hasn't done one for a month. oh I was just here Sunday. some allla I wasn't even late on Sunday. I was on time on Sunday. i wasn't even Yeah, you actually...

Speaker: Yeah, you were actually on i should Sunday. you had it made. My start time is 7-ish. As I said in the beginning, that gives me from 7 o'clock to 7.59 to not be late. 7-ish.

Speaker: I get that. I do that too. Because sometimes it'll be like two hours later. I'm like, you know what? At some point tonight. I'll be like the table company. Sometime between 9 a.m. and 10 p.m. I'll show up. Yeah. Yeah.

Speaker: Yeah, basically. um You do look pretty in your pink tutu, Jedi. Don't let anybody tell you differently. You're beautiful, just the way you are.

Speaker: Isn't that song about somebody with Down syndrome? Yes.

Speaker: I'm just going to say yes. I don't know. okay Thank you, James. Wally, how'd Speedway Stories go Monday night? haven't had a chance to listen to it. Went real good.

Speaker: Nice. Got another one this this Monday, so. Nice. Let's go. I'm hoping this Tuesday I'm going do a new music Tuesday.

Speaker: um like I'm not vouching for you no more on Tuesday, motherfucker. At least I know Saturday's guaranteed. i wish i was like you know what I was sick this week, and I'm like, look, I don't have to worry about anything until Saturday. I'm not stressing Tuesday.

Speaker: Sunday, like so last Saturday, I was not feeling the greatest. sunday you didn't You didn't seem like you doing. Rick didn't even look like he was feeling good Sunday when I was up there with you guys. When does he feel good? you Have you seen that guy? He's just sitting there. i've seen super i ended up so watching Superman pull it out in that Bills game.

Speaker: yeah and i it agree I don't know how he did it, but they did it. we We'll talk about that tomorrow because I know Rick and i are going to be talking a lot of shit because tomorrow is Buffalo and Cleveland. And I just found out yesterday that apparently Cash's second favorite team is Buffalo. And I said, dude, they could be your first favorite team. You're still young enough. You don't have to like them. You don't have to like them.

Speaker: I don't even like the Browns. I just root for Miles Garrett. Yeah. So what happens when he like goes away? That's so what happens when what? What happens when he goes away? what team are you going root for then?

Speaker: Who, Miles Garrett? I'm an idiot, and I'll still root for the Browns. Well, we need that. I've invested 44 years of my life to this fucking team, Brittany. It's like an abusive relationship. Every year, they they promise me they're going to change, yeah and they apologize, and they say, well, we won't do it again. you know And then week one of the next season, they punch me in the face, throw me down a flight of stairs, and I have to tell my friends. Hey, Arliss.

Speaker: that I walked into a a doorknob. you know I have no idea how many times I've been through that. but yeah your list is You know what's funny, Glick? She's a Closet Browns fan since she likes the Ravens.

Speaker: Think about it. i I was talking to Kayla today. why okay We were talking about that because she asked me. She was like, wait a minute, wait a minute. So the Baltimore was actually the Cleveland Browns. And I said, yeah, the fucking squeeze bag Art Modell promised Cleveland he wasn't leaving. And then in the middle of night, he packed his shit and fucking got out town. And then they won a Super Bowl with our fucking Cleveland Browns team.

Speaker: Yeah. Fuck you too, Ozzy. But where did he come from? Hit me again. Put some spank on it. ah But ah yeah, no. um Yeah, so yeah, we were talking about that today, and I was explaining that whole situation, and then how hard it was for the Browns to become an expansion team and come back. And it was just a thing.

Speaker: And I just. Well, I know a lot of people around here are Browns fans as well just because of the reason, too. I'll be like Ravens, Browns fans. just wish I could quit them.

Speaker: and We can't. like it's been aial It's been our kryptonite, man, for how long? ah But I'm telling you, there's going to be that season. We got that season when Baker took them to the playoffs, and I had that that that that one We got spoiled just by that one time.

Speaker: Yeah, I had that one moment where I was like, ah, it was all worth it. Oh, and they're back. And they're back. Oh. The Zuby Book. Oh, shit balls.

Speaker: The Browns be the Browns. Yeah, it is what it is at the end of the day. What are you going to do? Is that like butt to butt? Butt to butt. Hi.

Speaker: Butt to butt. Always butt to butt. Fart transfers. Fart transfers. Oh, about like Jake Paul's jaw last night? Oh. Oh, I'm going to talk about that. We're going to wait until the show comes on a little bit. We're going to talk about that last night. cause here said I got at last night during that from Rachel because I was going nuts.

Speaker: Yeah, that was intense. And I love the still picture of his jaw on the other side of his face. yeah i want i want i want the picture I want a freeze frame picture of after he got knocked the fuck out. is yeah yeah or the or of the Or the picture that's going around on TikTok Logan Paul reaction when his brother got knocked the fuck out.

Speaker: It was even more comical than... just That was the him like rubbing his back. He was by It'll be

Speaker: Hell, even if that fight was MMA, I still think Joshua would have done the same thing again. God. No chance. um I'll be right back. I need to grab my charger. Thanks for the warning.

Speaker: You're welcome. Anytime. My charger.

Speaker: my charger oh oh that Yeah, that was pretty cool, but I mean, still. I mean, that was neat how he represented what he did, but still. The tribute to Hogan, I mean, I'm not a Hogan fan. fuck First and foremost, fuck Hogan. I'm not a Hogan fan, but the tribute to Hogan was kind of cool.

Speaker: It was neat. Other than who he also had brought him out, that was kind of, I was like, gag me with 6ix9ine. Oh, yeah. That's what I'm saying. Yeah.

Speaker: A felon trying to stay, relevant a snitch trying to stay relevant would do with the Paul family. Yeah, i i I was watching, we were, what the hell were we doing? Oh, we had we had my work Christmas party last night.

Speaker: Oh, okay. So, ah and then I forgot that Alabama and Oklahoma were playing last night. So we had the work Christmas party and then we had to take the kids back to their mom's.

Speaker: When we dropped him off, her fiance, he was watching the game, and I was like, oh, shit, I forgot that Alabama was playing Oklahoma tonight. So I put that on my phone, and then when I put it on my phone, there was a commercial for the Jake Paul fight.

Speaker: So I switched over to that real quick, and I didn't care for all that. I didn't care for all that bullshit. So I kept trying to flip back to catch the fight, and When I flipped it on, it was when they were celebrating. So I was like, let me go ahead and rewind this back. So I rewound it back a couple of rounds. I'll tell what, it was... Two, three rounds. after the After the third round, during the third round, Paul realized he bit off more than could fucking chew.

Speaker: That third round, he realized, oh, shit, I'm here with an actual legit competitor. And he's going to fuck me up. Yeah. And he thought he thought he was going to wear him out by like running the running around. You know what I mean? they can I'll be honest. I'm a Joshua fan.

Speaker: I've watched him come up through and everything. That is the calmest I've ever seen him and any of in his whole career during a match like that. boxing He wasn't wearing one bit.

Speaker: i love the I love the smile. as He knew he had him when he hit him with that knockout punch. He was smiling when he landed that bitch. sorry Yeah, I saw that picture.

Speaker: He had a smirk on his face. He already knew what was about to happen. He's like, you're done, buddy. oh yeah well then the The biggest thing that I knew it was going to come the day after it was done is Paul's Partner for that MVP promotion Well he was oversized He was undersized for the fight Motherfucker don't run your god damn mouth Saying you can hang with the best And then you want to fight You can't hang with johnlo good things Who do you And you think you're going to hang with Canelo Really Fuck around and find out is literally Like if you look that up on the internet It's going to be Jay Paul's face gun Actually the leak was it had to go at least Two rounds for the content

Speaker: the I guess the highlight, though, that besides that knockout was ah Andre Lozowski fucking whipped that shit out of Daugherty's crew backstage. Oh, really?

Speaker: Yeah. Fucking all by himself took out six guys, including that Sean Daugherty motherfucking punk kid. Well, here's the thing with every with every Logan or Jake Paul fight is there's all these stupid stipulate stipulations. There's all these...

Speaker: These rules and everything else. And most of them are rigged. But Jake Falls fought two legit boxers. And lost twice. And he's lost. When he's not fighting old ass, retired MMA but mma fighters, basketball players, football players. Retired but retired boxers that are out of the setup. Dumped up.

Speaker: Old ass fucking Mike Tyson. like when When he fights legitimate boxers, he's lost. And you know what? He wanted this fight. Everybody can piss and moan and whine and cry all they want about the weight and height and size difference. He wanted this fight.

Speaker: he He thinks he's a big dog in the yard. and Also, he's not... He doesn't really boxing as much. It's still a don't matter. His ass cashed a check that his mouth couldn't handle in this fight. I was ready to see it. I'm going to go ahead and drop that link for anybody who wants to come on in while we're talking about the Jake Paul fight. Feel free. Mandy, Mandy.

Speaker: mandy But yeah, it was it was i was i wast I was fucking excited. Especially that fifth and sixth round when Joshua finally started land getting a chance to land it. I was like, I know it was over. And then he landed that knockout. I'm like fucking going nuts. I was going crazy. I was like, yeah how that's what you get, bitch.

Speaker: I kept like running back and forth from the bedroom to here to see. Before the knockout, they they showed the punch stats. And what was it?

Speaker: Fucking Jake only landed nine punches through six fucking rounds. But the bad part is, statistic-wise, if they went off percentage, the shitty part was it was actually Paul was winning just because of his percentage, even though he only landed that much.

Speaker: Because he only threw like 29 punches and landed nine of them. where he was It's the opposite version of the Tyson fight. we're post really need to fight This time it was Jake Paul that returned the favor. Jake Paul did pretty good at dodging some the punches. she he umed In the beginning.

Speaker: Honestly, he was more on his hands and knees begging, please don't kill me. Please kill Oh, and like, just kept wanting to hug him more than anything. and I was glad the ref finally said, enough's fucking enough. Yeah, right.

Speaker: Dropping to his knees. Black cock! I was actually waiting for Logan to start being a dick-hitting dumbass and, uh, Be like, oh, I'll call you out now and everything else is like, that's the first time in any of them.

Speaker: no Well, Logan, the thing of it is with Logan, he's got to keep his mouth shut because he's got that nice padded WWE contract.

Speaker: Logan started running his mouth a little bit and then AJ said something to him and then he shut the fuck up and he went back to the other side of the ring. yep Right before the knockout. That's when it happened. I'm this little prude.

Speaker: I'll beat your ass just like I beat your brother's ass. Yeah, that would be awesome. you shouldn now i'm ready now Now I'm ready for the ah then the schedule the Tyson Fury fight with Joshua now for next year.

Speaker: The contract was already signed. Now they just got to put a date to it.

Speaker: Hashtag Glick fights, Jake Paul. Please. I'll fight him. ah i'll fight him ah That would be awesome. mean, he might whoop He might very gas tap he might very well whoop my ass, but I'll jump on him like a fucking spider monkey and be like, surprise, it's street fight, motherfucker. Stick my thumbs in his Just sit on him. He'll be good. Like, how tall is Joshua?

Speaker: and Six four. okay so Six something. So you looking over top of Jake Paul and being wise as you are that besides Besides that... a goilla going against It's like a gorilla going against the fucking champagne. Well, besides the knockout being another slap in the face, Jake Paul said that Joshua before the fight, there before weigh-ins, that he wasn't going to make the signed contract under 245.

Speaker: And the fucker come in at 2.38. Damn. All right. Get

Speaker: your ass up. Yes, I got two more guests. This Monday and then to close out the year on the 29th. I got Dustin Henning coming back on to close out the year and stuff.

Speaker: next saturday Next Saturday night is the results of the Angel of Death for 2025.

Speaker: and then and What is that? Only two of us still in it? No. We started. we reg That's it. but It's a battle between me and you.

Speaker: No. So we started the year with me, you, ah Rick, Jeff, Blaze.

Speaker: Also, it's me and you, Rick. That's it let's forgive with this We lost Conor first, then we lost Jeff, and then we lost Blaze. and Yeah, so it's just the three of us, but I mean, i I took such an early lead so fast that there was like, you guys needed a lot of death.

Speaker: Not many people on our list died this year. how started my list. Are you allowed to reuse those names for the next year? Yeah, if they if they didn't die this year, yeah, you can 100% use them. Jamie Carter's... ah Glick's kryptonite. Fuck that piece of shit. Right in hell, Jimmy Carter, you son of a bitch. I'll see buddy i'll see you in hell, Jimmy Carter.

Speaker: i will see you in hell, Jimmy Carter. now But I think we're going to do either, we'll probably do our picks for 2025, 2026 on the 10th. Because... twenty twenty six on the tenth because you know New Year's Eve weekend, we got ah we got a lot of shit going on.

Speaker: So I don't want to and don't want rush people. I mean, I'll be getting home Friday. i think we'll be getting home Friday. so i'll be here we'll be here to do the show Saturday night.

Speaker: But I don't know who's going to be available. So we'll do it on the 10th, I think, so we can get Michael here, Britt here, you, Rick will be here, and then myself. And then maybe, maybe, maybe,

Speaker: If they're down for it, we'll do a chat but chatter's box list. We need to get Lazy in on it since he's always in the chatter's box. they can Our regulars can can can partake and and and have a list and see who the angel of death from the chat is, from the from the listeners are.

Speaker: Yeah, I'll have to write it down. You've got to memorize it. You have to memorize it. Thank you, man. i'll get Yeah, we'll figure out. I'll doctor it up. I'll do something for this year.

Speaker: I have a lot to memorize already. oh But yeah, anybody who didn't die this year, you are you are welcome to to use again. I'm talking to you too.

Speaker: I figured you can't really use a dead person. I can't think his goddamn name.

Speaker: The director. What's his fucking name?

Speaker: I can't even remember his name. Don't ask me about baseball. Spaceballs. Spaceballs. He's an iconic director in comedy. Well, people say is. I think his movies are ass, but that's just my opinion.

Speaker: Spaceballs. the 10th director sure i you yeah i think i think rick is not available on the third brooks that's right yeah mel brooks uh yeah i don't think rick's available on the third not rob reiner he's dead yeah good one randy ha too soon man murdered you here he yeah yeah yeah I don't know. I don't know. He's such an asshole. He's like, it sucks that you died, but that's what you get for talking shit about DTJ, motherfucker.

Speaker: What? It's like, what a dipshit, man. Rob Reiner always played like the same character and everything. I don't remember him in anything.

Speaker: Have you ever watched New Girl? Probably not. No, I don't think it's a girl show basically the girl that had the three dude roommates yeah oh yeah i've seen but i've seen i've seen it from time to time her daughter oh for real i didn't know that yeah it was like zoe duchanel so and i saw her real dad i'm saying in the show he was oh you got that right she pretty i'm wrong just Did you tell me to be pretty? is that what you said? Yes, she did.

Speaker: Be a pretty Glick. Be a pretty little boy. Now do this. i I want to see him do this. Yeah. that's good that's good He won't.

Speaker: He's scared. There is. All right. Scotto, get it. Get it. Scotto, get it. Get it.

Speaker: yeah funny Yeah, I've seen bits and pieces. I like most of the cast on that show. You never watched it. I love Nick. He's like, if there was a man in real life, like him. He is man in real life.

Speaker: Yeah, but like his character and his looks at certain point of the show. He doesn't act that way in real life, I don't think. how do you know? Do you know? i wish.

Speaker: Braid your beard. Braid your beard. Braid your beard. You got a purty mouth. I sure do get a purty mouth, Clay. I'm married.

Speaker: Mandy, you're going to braid it. um bre Oh, to say the bad word. Kayla needs to braid it up for you. You're going to get banned.

Speaker: It it was an accident. um i'm gonna I'm going to make it where you disappear like Jeff did.

Speaker: but Oh, Jesus.

Speaker: Are you underage? There goes our female audience.

Speaker: Yeah, Wally made Jeff. nothing i'll just keep I'll just keep removing you off until you don't come back. That's what I did. Randy. um If there are any other underage children around, yeah, you can get rid of me like Jeff.

Speaker: Did you know you you know what you call a handsome, sensitive, so man? Shut up. What's up, baby? You're in the doghouse now. I'm in the doghouse.

Speaker: ah you know

Speaker: only speaking the truth. I'm handsome, sensitive, and sweet. Ain't that right? Shit, too. That's right, baby. That's what she said. your he's only struck She's only stroking his ego. don't let everybody listen to him.

Speaker: Huh? i don't know. Wally started to talk, and then his brain stopped working, and his mouth just came out. And then I said, hi, Kayla. Hi. Yeah, Brissette.

Speaker: you friend

Speaker: My nickname hu nickdae is a rumor. Lazy, you have a lot of nicknames. I am not full of shit, Mandy.

Speaker: Lies! You sit on the phone of lies, Mandy.

Speaker: Default. No, that's your role. Default. Go default. Yeah, cam up, Jedi. Yeah. What are you doing? Cam up.

Speaker: Cam up.

Speaker: Come up on Wally's face. I mean, come up on the panel. Either way, he'd be on the panel. so

Speaker: Wally, you can download other backgrounds if you want. know you probably like that one, but yeah i'm but I've been working on getting some. so I've got to get your pictures. I've got to get your... I feel you there.

Speaker: I've got to get your things. Fuck, i can't um my brain has not been... Kayla and I both got fucking lost in Walmart today. Our brains just shut the fuck down. was going to say, bet it was packed as hell like it was here in Mount Vernon.

Speaker: That fucking sucked. Walmart wasn't too bad, was it? It wasn't too bad. a Look who decides to join early instead of staying in the your driver's box ah You okay? You need a hug? What's up, the Jedi? as a well saying What is up?

Speaker: Hi, part-timer. Sure. but You what? Part-timer. What does that mean? He has actually come up early. Usually he just stays in the chatterbox until the end.

Speaker: Well, maybe he's feeling saucy. oh That is not true, Wally. I come up early most of the time. Sometimes. Once in a great while. Most of the time, sometimes. Most of the time, sometimes. Because I'm a part-timer. We all are.

Speaker: yeah I guess it's come to that. Mandy, now you've got to get in here. Yeah, Mandy. Where you at? Where you at, girl? We need you. ah what's up quick you handsome sensitive sweet son of a you handsome or sweet son of a fucking beard you guys need the room to yourself like yes it would be nice it's going to you guys to alone did you believe them quick they don't even give us the privacy we need i know how dare that how dare you know you didn't ask me to film it but i mean that's true

Speaker: sometimes i rather Our other camera person for our Only Glicks fan page, it they called in sick today, so we need you. And then Wally holds the boomstick. Yeah, he does. He wishes. yeah He fucking wishes. Hey, Chris Technician. What's up? What up, Chris Technician?

Speaker: God damn, I'm already giggling. I'm wearing a jersey in my doll guard. They don't probably be here eventually. Kayla said, fuck all you people. Where's Jersey and Moe Dog? Wow. That's hurtful.

Speaker: I always make sure I say hi to her and that's really good. I was hoping you were in like the bathroom thingy so I can ask Yeah, she said she said, are you in the back door thingy when I was... Whoa, whoa, got to pay extra for that. That's the premium package on her own Facebook. If she doesn't know if I'm in the back door, then there's a problem. I don't know. Am I in your back door? Jedi never has this problem. He knows what I'm in. I okay

Speaker: use Glick's beard to clean up afterwards. That's why it's got the streaks in it. He's a douche beforehand. There's a racing stunt. That's Wally. this gives you Yeah, I mean you you do finish very quickly right i see it this That's awesome I should probably change our logo for Christmas, but yeah we find much site work I'm gonna find a picture of drunk Santa Claus and that's gonna be our Christmas logo this year Well, you need to get your panel under control.

Speaker: this is Oh, no, you're up here now. It's your panel Britt is back doing Kayla now? What? We definitely need to film that one. ought to do What did you have that what do you what you up to that you had to ask? for I don't know if we've had this story here before. We have a Canadian. He's breached the border.

Speaker: French Canadian. The worst kind. Get the Mounties. get them on you her number snapchat or whatever right I could give her your number, couldn't I?

Speaker: this one Are you Brit? when it cost you I didn't hear you say Brit. but yeah anyway Are there other Brits in here that I wasn't aware of? Where's the other Brittany? Everybody change their names. The rest of the night, we're all Brit.

Speaker: like Just put on a Santa suit. hey Cheers to you, James. Cheers. Instead of drunk saying, shut up, Mandy. You're being awfully mean to me. She's on one tonight. She's really tearing in you tonight, Blake.

Speaker: I know. Mandy, save it. What's going on, James? I did have Teetos. I'm doing right. Can't complain. I couldn't tell.

Speaker: you see super Canadians never complain. Goddamn Canadians. oh so Oh, you're in charge of the wall. Why do these Canadians have Americans? No, Brittany's the one to let him up on there.

Speaker: okay I was saying, is it okay? don't know. Did you even check his passport, Brittany? No, didn't. First of all, I don't get a passport, motherfucker. See what I mean?

Speaker: The security is really lax. oh I'm pretty chill, you know. Hey.

Speaker: Sorry. What are you talking? A boot? Eh?

Speaker: I'm sure he's never heard that one. boot. It's goddamn a boot. Tell the rest of your country, okay? I was doing Britney's Canadian impression. How dare you, James? How dare you, sir? i have a passport. Why do you have a passport?

Speaker: what This is my second one, too. It's probably got her green card in it, too. i don't have that. I just go wherever I want. Wherever Glick may roam. Oh, God, we're all in trouble. France, England, Ecuador, and Greece.

Speaker: Glick does not leave the greatest country on the planet. The United States of America, baby.

Speaker: America. Women and women. Yeah, that's what I like. Murka. Fuck yeah. okay Murka. Fuck yeah. Guns and stuff.

Speaker: Whatever he says. I forget. It's okay. I don't think they know what they said either. you just Whatever words you want to say. As long it sounds like this, you can say whatever.

Speaker: That's so true. Damn it.

Speaker: damn Oh, ouch. Ouch. Jesus. Click's unchained. I'm unchained. I'm unhinged.

Speaker: What do you do to piss Mandy off? I don't know. god that's That's their love language is talking shit to each other. All upset. All mad and shit. did you did you Did your uncle brother will leave you? What's going on?

Speaker: You would know. I hope that's your sister. She's adopted. oh

Speaker: Well, I guess technically I'm the adopted one. She found you. was about to say, math is not math. She said, you seem like a stray. He's a rock big, dumb animal.

Speaker: It's like a squash. She found her remind yeah the baby Sasquatch when he was little. Baby Squatch. It's the same squeegee. It's the same squeegee.

Speaker: it's going we each

Speaker: I'm not mad. Just messing with Glick. Just keeping me in line, keeping me checked. See the champs back there. I then knocked out that that Jake Paul wannabe in the background. i got an alien hanging out with me.

Speaker: Sam Squash wants to find out how to get his Sasquatch.

Speaker: He'll Sasquatch, y'all, right?

Speaker: Brittany's like, explain I guess I'll get to her up from the floor. up Oh, wait, here she is. Anyways.

Speaker: I need to not talk.

Speaker: I have a heart for stray animals. Oh, that's so cute. She was just wandering around in the woods. Mandy adopted it.

Speaker: You okay? You sure? You want beer? Oh, did she? I got that. oh you won't like those. Those are gross. I should throw those away. Cut water, Bloody Mary. it's just a good one. I drank one one night when we were still alive because I ran out of beer and i I was waiting on my door dad's beer to get here.

Speaker: That was not a good science experiment. ever You weren't a good at science experiment. Well, I was a fantastic scientist. That explains everything, Brett. You know what? You nailed it on the head. I was a science experiment.

Speaker: Gone right. fifty fifty I am doing good tricks technician. How are you doing, darling? Okay, Brett. You okay, Brett?

Speaker: She's examining her passport. I think I'm okay. I don't know. It's just in the host. It's okay.

Speaker: I'd like to think I'm at least okay. the Glick was just wandering in the hoe garden when I rescued him like a good big sister. Oh! Damn!

Speaker: My big sister. You have to save these for the freaking roast on New Year's Eve. Come on, man. there Okay, but I'm pulling up the live thing and I'm going to read out some of the comments from the people that are that's right best yeah like the The best roasting is going to come from the chat.

Speaker: Right. So I'm going to read out some of the roasts from them if people show up. that It's going to be over by like 1030. So everybody will have time to get loosey-goosey before. the cha And I'll make sure if you want your name to be known.

Speaker: Like, this is lazy Jedi that had to say this. I'm to make sure to give credit out to people that have shit to say.

Speaker: I'm excited. We already scared Glick away just talking about this. Yeah, right? Yeah, I got to start writing down my thoughts.

Speaker: Yeah, dude, I've been doing it, but it's like been distracting me from my actual jokes. Which I've nailed, by the way. I just i need to get my emotions down.

Speaker: I'm excited. I'll be back. Okay, weird bird. On the 28th, I might be doing a show in Cleveland with Michael just to get my ah shit warmed up.

Speaker: Cleveland. That was good. i like that. That guy. are you eyeballing for, sir? Okay. What up, that guy?

Speaker: Get your ass on panel, bro. and Hang out. Talk some shit. What's the difference between a refrigerator and a woman? Fridge doesn't fart when I pull my meat out

Speaker: out. Damn it james it yeah it, James. I don't even have a comeback for that. Because it's true. There's no coming back from that.

Speaker: Yeah, that guy. Get your ass up in here. Make sure you get to all your farts out. jesus

Speaker: the back Mandy said, I won't be there. Lame. What?

Speaker: Damn it, Mandy.

Speaker: Yeah. Show your face. well so being yeah

Speaker: but Yes, I have a response to that joke. What do men in parking spaces have in common? Oh, shit. what All the good ones are taken. The rest are handicapped.

Speaker: Look at this panel. That's the truth. I thought I had something to do with like pulling out. Damn it.

Speaker: What up that guy? Is that gay? i already put up the comment. Did you really call him that gay? Yes. whoa Wow. Wow. That's how you treat our guests in the chatterbox. He ain't going to show up.

Speaker: We don't have to make jokes about pulling out. There's sex clubs are already covering that joke. There are a lot. years and all very products this Brittany doesn't like you people Brittany loves me thank you much Everybody loves you Mandy it a trick mindy No everybody does not love Mandy I have some crazy people to prove that James is Canadian he doesn't know who to love

Speaker: wasn everybody What you meant to say, in James' defense, he's Canadian. He can't help it. Plus, he's like a toddler, so i gave yeah I gave up my teaching days. Sorry. yeah Canadians are basically retarded. They can't help it. Some of them even speak French. That proves it. jason They don't know what they are. like well What's wrong with speaking French?

Speaker: He does not sound like he speaks French. Say like a full sentence, James. I can't do that anymore. I used to when was little. I can't do that anymore. I smoke too much weed, man. It sounds like you're spitting and talking about waterfront.

Speaker: Oh, I almost bought that thing behind you with all the murders. Wait, what? That tapestry with all the horror movies. With all the murders? Just a blanket that I put up.

Speaker: <unk>ar There was a tapestry I was going to buy with. Unalivers.

Speaker: You can't say certain words. YouTube will get mad. They get all butthurt. They get butthurt. Hurry say i like yeah I'll get an email from YouTube and they'll say, how dare you?

Speaker: I didn't do it. My panel's retarded. I can't control them. He says that. true we're We're allowed to say retard now. Donald Trump said so. Yeah, we brought it back. oh Thank God. The retard said it was okay. The orange retard said it was okay, yes. Why you talking to Mandy like that?

Speaker: Oh! ah right get a man orange brick I say say anything. Rude. It's just diabolic. So rude. My bad. It's okay. She gets one joke out of every six with me, so I'll let her have that one. and yeah You're an easy target, so I i choose on that one.

Speaker: How about you show up then on New Year's Eve, Mandy? Why don't you show up? Because I have better things to do with my time. You can come up on stage and say some things. You'll get paid. That's what I said.

Speaker: be there like I have so many better other things to do. She gets real quick every Saturday. Why don't you do it on New Year's?

Speaker: Yeah, y'all are going to have enough fun roasting him.

Speaker: We're going to have fun. You guys having a good old pig roast? The good old pig roast? No, it's a Sasquatch roast. We found him.

Speaker: I wonder what they would actually taste like, Sasquatch. Sasquatches? Well, it tastes like James. James, you just come on down and give Glick a nibble. He'll give you a nice growl for um ah i don't even ever ever eat jacklink jacklinks beef jerky that's what sasquatches taste like

Speaker: but I just got this mental image of dude biting glick and glick going, don't do that again. I didn't need that image my head.

Speaker: um you he's getting off to later tonight

Speaker: I can't. no Is there a way to wash your brain through your ear canal? I don't know, but I need to scrub it out after that. well Sorry, y'all. I'm so tired.

Speaker: what You're not sick anymore, right? No, not sick anymore. just tired. okayop That's the worst thing to get sick is when you're finally not sick anymore, your fucking body's just wiped. That's what I'm going for.

Speaker: that's what i'm No rest for the wicked. why that We had a busy, really busy yet day yesterday because it was my hubby's birthday. Oh, nice. Happy birthday, hubby.

Speaker: Wait, what did you for his birthday? Happy birthday, hubby. Happy birthday. I'm not saying all You're not saying, oh, shit, he had a good birthday, that means. Well, of She let him leave the house. Breakfast in bed. Did you bring him breakfast in bed?

Speaker: ah No, we're not big breakfast eaters. so I don't know if we like you anymore, Mandy. Why? Breakfast food is like the ultimate food.

Speaker: Oh, I didn't say I don't eat breakfast food. I just said we don't eat breakfast. Oh, like first thing in the morning? Yeah. You know what's weird about breakfast food? I like it like for like dinner. I don't like it. Breakfast for dinner, yeah yeah. Breakfast food is best for like when you really don't feel like cooking and you're you know want to whip up something quick. What kind of breakfast are you cooking? I get fancy with my shit.

Speaker: I'm with you, Brittany. like Breakfast is not quick and easy. Breakfast is not quick and easy. It's not quick and easy. Shut up, Jedi. Although it is like Glick in the fact that most of the times it's kind of unsatisfying.

Speaker: what's that Lazy, we gotta to save that one. I'm gonna repeat that one at the road. It was one time, Jedi. Jedi.

Speaker: Yeah, one time and then another one time and then another one time. I know you don't know math, but it adds up. might not always be quick, but we know he's easy, don't we, Jenna? Exactly. Oh, man, I'm so happy you're here.

Speaker: It is really both, though. As long as... um We're shamanes. I hate you people. We're shamanes. He's out there searching for his Don't worry about it. He knows you love us. Shaman Brittany. Where's my real friend? Where's Shaman? If yeah the flat ever really stopped picking on you, you would worry that something was wrong.

Speaker: You were quiet at first when you came in here. I was like, wait, what's going on? Somebody's got to do it. I fuck with everybody. to get my comeuppance somewhere. You see?

Speaker: i gotta get my comeupp in somewhere you so fuck use Youth peoples are no good at it. speak I hate that you say youth. That's like what Pennsylvania say.

Speaker: you That's what it was? people cool pennsylvania At this point, I've been racking on you for a few years now. street Pennsylvania area says yinzers. Yins. Marylanders say y'all.

Speaker: We say y'all. say y'all in Ohio. Yeah. and we say y'all we say y'all know yeah I'm Southern, so yeah, it's y'all. look Unless it's a big group and then it's all y'all.

Speaker: yeah I swear to God, Ohio's got to be the most Southern Northern state I've ever i've ever been in. I've been to a lot Midwest states. It's like, this is the most Southern state I've ever been in. There's such a fine line between the Midwest and the South anyway. so I lived down in Charleston for 10 years, and I didn't hardly ever hear a southern accent. And when I did hear a southern accent, it was somebody from Ohio.

Speaker: Because them motherfuckers from southern Ohio got thick southern accents. Thick inbreeding, too. They're little too close to the Kentucky-West Virginia line, Brittany. There's a lot of inbreeding in southern Ohio. That's that hillbilly triangle.

Speaker: We are the Florida of the North up here. we are i feel like Maryland has like three different types of accents because you go down to Palma. New York's like that. New York has a whole bunch of different different accents.

Speaker: Louisiana's like that too. so yeah dependent Yeah, well totally like depending upon what parish you're down. In New York, it's the boroughs. Depending upon what borough you're from, you've got a different accent. Oh, boy.

Speaker: or that that whats some man pitch together yeah accent That

Speaker: that was kind of funny. It doesn't make any sense, but they don't make any sense, but sometimes they don't have to make any sense. It's nonsense.

Speaker: Nonsensical nonsense. which Let's go Everybody make sure you like, share, subscribe. you do do do Like, share, and unsubscribe?

Speaker: Oh, so now you want to talk? Now you want to talk? I will be back probably in about 30 minutes. We might be here. Yeah. Alright, see you in a little while. I can't help it. I'm struggling. I talk with my hands. I try not to.

Speaker: No, the first time you were like It's not so romantic. It's autism. Alright. I got you all. I'll be back.

Speaker: Where'd Wally go? Did his wife smurder him? I don't know. Probably. Poor Wally. R.I.P. Wally. R.I.P.

Speaker: yeah

Speaker: I just want to bring this up just because... I

Speaker: don't know. It's funny. I got to play with it. That's going to be our unnecessary roughness thumbnail. The dude in the background, wasn't he a comedian? Yeah, it's Bert Kreischer in the background.

Speaker: Yeah. You didn't know that I was friends with Bert Kreischer?

Speaker: Neither did I. I'm not sure, man. thought you were being honest there for second. No. I'm serious. Me and Bert go way back. Hopefully he shows up on the show one time.

Speaker: Bert Kreischer knows your friends with Bert Kreischer. I posted that on social media and tagged Bert in it. I'm hoping one day you'll see it. That'd be dope. I shared it just because also I want it. That would be so cool if he did that, but it's not going happen. like The only comedian I met in person was Tom Greenfield. At a dispensary. That's pretty cool. Oh, that's badass. Fuck yeah, that's cool. Tom Green, he's a Canadian.

Speaker: I know Tom Green. This is the Tom Green show. He was funny for about five minutes. It's not the Green. This is my favorite show. It is my show. yeah I forgot the chick that he married. Drew Barrymore.

Speaker: Yes, that guy. Haters would say it's AI, but Bert and I, we go way back. That guy, you want to come up here and talk shit? Do it. Do it. What should be with that guy? Oh, well, like on the Lazy Jedi and Shaman show. We don't promote other shows on this show.

Speaker: Wow, then I'm never promoting your show again. You know what, we're shamanette again. I asked Ian, we're shamanette. He's at work, I texted him. Oh, shaman from the Lazy and Shaman show? Is that who you're talking about? The Shaman show?

Speaker: Sounds like a pair of cunts if you ask me. i'm ah That guy and I have talked shit on their show before. No, that guy's cool. Yeah, that guy's cool.

Speaker: That is the coolest. a g shaman show that's it's it that's ah It's an alright show. it's ah It's a good warm up to Saturday nights. I will say that. It gets you prepared. It's quick and easy. like think shut your last too long when are when are you When are you off again Jedi so I can come back?

Speaker: When are you getting off again Jedi so he can come back? I mean like five minutes. Yes. But that too. That too. What she said. That's being generous.

Speaker: I'm a generous lover. again thank you he Generosity sells on the Lazy Glicks Only the fan. It does. It does. People like it.

Speaker: Sometimes Jedi is very generous. And he's like, yo I'm going to give him a little reach around. i hate putting this up, but 9 out of 10 is true. love that.

Speaker: Nine out of ten grannies get moist. I think I did a pretty good job yeah with that granny. I think she she fits the vibe of Saturday nights and the network as a whole. That was a random picture. That's the gremlin.

Speaker: That's the gremlin. She guards the door. Make sure nobody that we don't want. Do not get her wet.

Speaker: Otherwise she turns into that. You won't be able to, don't worry. It's a Jedi. This does. No. oh damn i was going to say this ah o

Speaker: yes ah A lot of slur-like behavior going on around here. Last night, Michael was wearing his danta hat or Santa shirt and had sunglasses on. i was like, yo, that's totally MoDog. And he's like, oh!

Speaker: It's MoDog. It looks just like him. Where's Jer's Dog at tonight, huh? It's not a Saturday night until Jer's Dog's here. Well, it's because Lazy is here and not live.

Speaker: I know I usually go yeah we show more so often. I don't think so. I think they come up here more Yeah, wow they love me they like no they they love me yeah I know it's because the beautiful beard yeah but yeah but Here's the thing I i'm I'm already customized. I'm not default Yeah, but you know what the fun the fun part is customizing a default character, okay?

Speaker: This is already been customized so your old news i can You can still customize. You can customize. You just derailed my brain, Shadai. It doesn't take much. yeah

Speaker: You didn't notice? No. Sometimes I This is what Jedi could like.

Speaker: no sometimes i don't realize it was a brick quake chicago go ground i i'm the fully customized jedi this is what jedi could look like This is the future of me. Future Jedi.

Speaker: God. see Glick and I are the same person just in different timelines, okay? Yeah, right. I'm in the future. I'm future Jedi. That's scary. That really is scary.

Speaker: How can you get it done? I'm terrified, Brittany. What you think it's going to work? That's what I have to look forward to. This is why I bought a gun. my God. It put me out of my misery?

Speaker: so Brittany's going to come to South Canada? Brittany's got a gun. That's a different song. If I end the past Jedi, then future Jedi doesn't exist.

Speaker: yeah Change a bunch of timelines if that happens. Butterfly effect. have my ways. No, it's... up

Speaker: She shoots you and then future Jedi actually turns into... Do you see James trying to process this information? Dude, can make this into a comic book somehow. You know who he reminds me of? He reminds me of a Canadian canadian version of K-Mag.

Speaker: I thought you were just going to stop at a Canadian. He reminds me of one of the fuckins that the um hockey players from Dogma. He's like one of those kids from the beginning. Yeah, that' this that's That beat the shit out of God.

Speaker: Letterkenny, let's go. all right wait We got the man, the myth, the legend, I think. it's actually good But he doesn't show his face, so here he is. The dicks? Oh, we have a shaman.

Speaker: Quick, somebody get a goat to sacrifice. What's going Shaman's here. Finally, somebody who likes me. He never said he liked you. Yeah, said he loves you. he never said he liked him yeah you know't how loves you right

Speaker: Ha. Ha. Ha.

Speaker: that guy yeah that's right hey ah shaman i think i think you should you know give jedi ah a vacation so are you driving home shaman he just cut off give jeddi a vacation why so i can come back up on the show i don't come up there when jeizer

Speaker: drama Yeah, I just totally missed those. Yeah, it's kind annoying. That was the whole thing. My signal cut out a little bit. I didn't hear any of that. You know, Friday night. Glick's beard was interfering with your signal.

Speaker: Friday nights, man. My schedule's jam-packed. I go to bed at like 9 o'clock. Just like your asshole. No, that's really the end of the week. Nah, that stays open all night. Yeah, i was about to say, that's the only thing that's awake. 7-11, baby. 24-7, 366. Just like all day.

Speaker: just like denny's just serving grand slams all day I wish. It's twenty four seven Walmarts. I miss them so much. Oh, I miss ah fucking COVID. Yeah, COVID fucked that up. Yeah, fuck them. You'd see some of the weirdest people on earth at Walmart in like two in the morning. I'm one of them for sure. i never I never feel bad for how I look when I walk into Walmart because it's guaranteed there's going to be 30 other people.

Speaker: That's a confidence booster walking into Walmart at 2 a.m. I feel like a fucking rock star right now. like You're like, all right, I'm not doing so bad. like I can't afford therapy, so I'm just going to go to Walmart at 2 a.m. to feel better. In the real world, I'm a 4.

Speaker: In Walmart, I'm a 12. Yeah, for sure. I like to get the little kids' bikes and ride them around. And like, their legs are long as fuck. So I'm just like... he Just thinking of that dude from fucking... What's that movie? The one where he tortures people makes them like dig shit out their eyes.

Speaker: Jigsaw, yeah. Jigsaw, yeah. That's all I'm thinking about when you're like, I'm having the little kids like shit. was like, die small? Yeah.

Speaker: So, said you are you saying... got the penis pump. Are you saying like Gremlin Brittany rolls around Walmart at 2 a.m. m on a tricycle? Yeah, that's a good thing. That actually makes sense. That checks out.

Speaker: I got my tricycle. That ends the gas. that i you ask I remember when they used to have the little demo games. They used to have the demo games at Walmart and you could play video games for hours. yeah, yeah.

Speaker: I'll find something that looks like balls and something that looks like a dick and then I'll come around the corner and just be like, meh. Jesus Christ.

Speaker: And then with my friend's mom, I'll be like, yeah, I do. That's why Brittany is only allowed to shop at Target. ah No, I'm actually banned from there. Okay. yeah Then I will be like, hey, do you need that preparation hin you were talking about? Or that batch of sales? Something like that.

Speaker: I'll yell over to my friend's mom. Do that next time to your person. i don't hang out with my friend's mom. should i Well, I do out with my friend's mom.

Speaker: It's been a while since I've gone shopping with my friends' moms. There's this one time in sixth grade, I think they did that. but so thing You asked about her preparation age. All my friends are online. I don't have any real life friends. So it'd be a long trip just to go to Walmart with with with somebody's mom. I'm on down to Florida. I'll be i'll be up in Warren at New Year's Eve. So I'll go to Walmart with Michael's mom. Be like, Michael's mom, let's go to Walmart.

Speaker: Michael's mom has got it going. She's all I want. She is having some issues. So send some good vibes. Oh, I always give vibes to Michael's mom.

Speaker: She sounds like cool like a like a real nice lady. Well, she produced Michael, so you know she's wonderful. Rosemary's baby. was so sweet of you to say.

Speaker: That was so sweet. I'm sure he's going to love it. That wasn't a compliment. It was a compliment. He's a wonderful person. I love how you're laughing while you say that. He's a oh wonderful he's ah person. what He's a real stand-up guy.

Speaker: Cause he's a comedian too.

Speaker: it's ah That's a, that's a Brittany slapper.

Speaker: ah You know what? Dad jokes are not off the table. They're still fine. I love them. I'm a dad. Happy Father's Day.

Speaker: so happy on father's day Thank you. I didn't know that today. It's not.

Speaker: But I missed it. I'll figure I'll give it to you. I appreciate it, Sharmin. Here's a hug. cold That looks more like a choking mouth. Whatever. That's like rear naked choke. Yeah, well, I don't know how big he is. He never shows himself.

Speaker: I'm big enough.

Speaker: what she saved James, get control your damn panel. yeah you can You're taking over now, James. well You guys are all fucking fired. my god that's um That's a good decision. That's the boss move. James is right.

Speaker: canadian to be I'm going to go update my resume. Thanks for having me. Hey, firing us is nice because if you quit, you can't get unemployment.

Speaker: True. True that. True that. I was only paying you guys two bucks an hour anyways. oh my Well, we get free health insurance.

Speaker: How is the health insurance? Other than it being free, is it good?

Speaker: Our healthcare care system sucks. Fuck, it takes about six hours to see a doctor at a fucking ER. Oh, well, it takes about six months here, or so.

Speaker: Well, I see here. To get a fusty floor on family doctor, takes about like six months. Yeah, I'm currently going through trying to find a new one, unfortunately.

Speaker: My insurance is being taken by my other doctor and she moved. they Anyways, I'm about to move to New Zealand or some shit.

Speaker: Sean, what are you doing? Are you driving? No, no, not at all. He's actually on the special bus, the short bus. Slow down.

Speaker: slow down

Speaker: Like it isn't already slow enough for you.

Speaker: I want it to be really slow.

Speaker: hu yeah He tall and dark, crispy black. Who are you talking about? Oh, I guess Shaman. That makes sense. He's talking about Jedi. He's tall, dark, and crispy.

Speaker: he's talking yeah you i guys tall dark and crispy yes Yeah, he is. He's a tall, dark, independent black man.

Speaker: So independent.

Speaker: for shit short i almost said shit bus short bus ride i write that too ah Gross. It helps. It makes the ride a lot more better.

Speaker: a lot more better. Yeah. A lot more better is... So I'm doing a thyroid? Oh, I can't even... If shit going down the road before, then you have to... Shit yourself going down the road? Or stuck your ass out the door and shit?

Speaker: Oh, no, man. You got to put a toilet in where your seat is. he Just wear sit back, relax, and enjoy the ride. I just have to use control to stick my ass out the window.

Speaker: What does an old lady's vagina do like? I peed out the van before. I've done that. What does an old lady's what cases look like? What does an old lady's vagina...

Speaker: Now I forget. It's us. What does an old lady's vagina smell like?

Speaker: Mothballs. Bingo hole. smells like a damn bingo hole. Bingo hole. That's funny as shit. depends. Man, I missed the whole fucking joke. Damn it.

Speaker: Fucking shit cut out. guys is that is that the is that the Is that the gold you're going to bring New Year's Eve? No, that's just a stupid one that I love. That's her closing line. That's her closer.

Speaker: I don't, well, I mean, I do have shit jokes in there, you which Glick you know part of. Oh, shit. Andrew Tate got his ass beat tonight.

Speaker: Who did he? yeah Andrew Tate, yeah, he lost. Who the fuck's Andrew Tate? Wow, I really wanted to see that, too. and I forgot it was on tonight for fuck, but I just watched a couple of clips on Twitter, but he got his ass Is Andrew Tate an actor?

Speaker: No, he's a former kickboxer and he's the alpha male guy that always talks shit. Oh, how do you not know? Yeah, he got his ass. He did boxing though, right? But it was a boxing match. Yeah, it was a boxing match. It wasn't kickboxing. It was a boxing match. Look, I'm disappointed.

Speaker: You're disappointed? don Anyway, you don't know who so Jake Paul got his ass kicked. Andrew Tate got his ass kicked. I don't buy into that. I feel like the world's course correcting little bit. Well, Andrew Tate's at least a fighter. you know He came into this. yeah Yeah, he was a champion at one point.

Speaker: Yeah, so. But when he spouts off all his alpha shit, it just makes him a little beta bitch. Yeah. That's why him and his brother are constantly holding each other's dick so there's no women around. Unless they're paid for it. Right, right, right, right. Jesus Christ, Shaman, are you on the speedway? He's he's an F1 racer. You didn't know that?

Speaker: I didn't know that. That wasn't even me, but I just passed that guy. that that It like he passed you and everybody else. He did, and then I passed him right after that. That was how that works.

Speaker: See? you Someone's like, not today, motherfucker. someday Not in my house. my No, no, no. Not today.

Speaker: Not in my house. Why are you gay? my You. You are gay. And?

Speaker: the And? That guy. And horny? And horny? You could have left that out, but that's fine.

Speaker: kind of well this gas station better not fucking be closed again i'll never come here again it was close you just wait can wait till they're open before you come back but either way what is it nice and uh days and we're now super troopers stuttering and or what does he say literally what i that's that' a good movie i fucking love the first one i pretend like i guess what that's what my gas is not on that side but but did you guys know that the arrow on your like little gas yeah points to where your gas hole is

Speaker: Your gas hole. Whoa. My gas hole's in the rear. Someone could be in such a gas hole. How often do you guys buy blinker fluid?

Speaker: All the time. Bro, I keep mine full all the time, man. You never get caught without blinker fluid, bro. That's like rule number one. That's a ro that's her rookie mistake.

Speaker: Canadians are so late on those jokes, I swear. I just suck at telling you. I feel like you're... Canada just reached the 90s, okay? really yeah ask ask Ask James about Nirvana. He's going to lose his shit. Fucking Weezer, man. Fucking Nirvana.

Speaker: Fucking Nirvana. Kurt Cobain's greatest hit was boom. Boom. James, I hope you didn't hear the news. He used a shotgun on his face. No, it was Courtney Love. I know Kurt Cobain took a shotgun and beat his face off. No, it was Courtney Love. Bro, I'm telling you, I'm never coming back to this fucking He just became Rivers Como from Weezer. That's what actually happened.

Speaker: Rivers Como. California. know know that's a party oh we should do buddy holwley didn't it That's what I prefer. Yeah, a striped sweater?

Speaker: He's like sweater and... yeah some good stuff sweater ah what the like the wear a strip we you it like is like sweater and flutering twitter and stretch where's the mo at a we your had like three songs they're not terrible they're not terrible they're okay not i don't mind them

Speaker: baly hill on on the other here i want a play you yeah Yeah, he's really into Weezer, guys. He's wheezing it out down there. Holy shit. I'm the Weezer number one fan, James Ottawa.

Speaker: They played around here recently. ah and are you going and like the last year Are you in the Weezer fan club, James? He's the president.

Speaker: Maybe he's the Prime Minister. He's the Prime Minister. minister Nice, Hey, this is his heir. What heir? Not only a client.

Speaker: Wait, what?

Speaker: sweet

Speaker: this is his hair gross what everybody said not only a client wait what She can soak my big toe.

Speaker: Swifty? Swifty, you over there? if You're there.

Speaker: It's okay to like Tyler, whatever the fuck her name is. Taylor, Tyler, Brad, Swift. It doesn't hi tyler See what song she makes up the next time she gets broken up with. She was born Tyler Swift.

Speaker: She makes so much money off her breakups. She has. I used to be a huge fan of Travis Swift. and But then he got slow. That was so dumb. It was funny. She was going to say, you're so dumb. was stupid. I did almost say that. You make funnies, Brittany. It's what I do. I did almost say that. Shaman's not wrong.

Speaker: I wish you did. though to but so I heard that shit. I heard it come out, man. I was about to say shaman. That's stupid. Same thing. sha is money it's Shaman. shaman. That's stupid shaman. He's a shaman girl in a shaman world. why you so stupid shaman oh my gosh you're so stupid you're almost dumb said almost almost

Speaker: right oh god um guys we're going into seven eleven right now and to go on those gas station tell when i said hi yes Hey, they have the Dubai chocolate here. I'm kind of scared. you won't You won't tell them that I... Brittany says hi. Tell them Brittany says hi.

Speaker: Don't be stealing anything, Charlie. This man has gun tucked in his book track. first Probably. More than likely. i mean, if you're a betting man, you should bet on that.

Speaker: Yeah. Ten bucks?

Speaker: I don't even have 10 bucks. Wait, are you getting 10 bucks? I'm going to run out of the end of the night. do like

Speaker: Did you hear he's buying Powerball? If he wins, he'll never speak to me again. He said he's buying a Powerball. He's buying 8-ball at the 7-Eleven. I sell them everywhere nowadays, James.

Speaker: really fine aren and he but know going that's bit an april at the seven eleven oh cool oh yeah sound live nowday james Are you like that? You thought I wasn't going to do it? You thought wasn't going to it? he did it. He done did it. He done did it. He said, huh? And I said, Brittany says, hi. He's like, oh, what? I don't know. Yeah, I take a powerball in there and Brittany says, hi.

Speaker: You notice how I waited until got my ticket first, all right? Yeah, you waited until the very end. Oh, I thought he was doing this for a second. I did too.

Speaker: I was looking it. was like, he's doing that wrong. I like that one better though. Oh my gosh. He's got his little weed grinder going.

Speaker: Full bore. Do you know that's illegal in Canada? Yeah. He's going to get arrested by a Mountie. Oh, the Mountie's going to get you... It's legalized here. You can carry up to 12 ounces on the street.

Speaker: ah you You can have 20 ounces? What? 28 grams. You're allowed to carry 28 grams. Damn it. Oh. God, they're freaking metric system.

Speaker: Oh, you can actually bring it on the airplane and travel different parts of Canada. you can bring No way. You can bring it on airplanes? Yeah. i have Have you tested that theory? Well, I haven't been on an airplane in a long time. Because they wouldn't let you on for a variety of reasons, James.

Speaker: If you have a tampon box. think I was five or six the last time I was on an airplane. I went to Florida. so That's your problem. He went to Florida and he came back like that. James, you have a tampon box?

Speaker: No, it was a Jack in a box. He came back like that. can't believe Shaman's not like that. He came back from Florida and then he wasn't Canadian anymore.

Speaker: No, my ah grandparents had a winter trailer home. Winter trailer in Florida. That sounds like the dream.

Speaker: Filled with gators. They go flying over there and get out of the smoke. Yeah, but when you say winter in front of it, it just sounds... We get about five months.

Speaker: Four to five months of snow.

Speaker: Gross. The snow's still kind of melting out here. We got like a little smidgen left. A little dingleberry.

Speaker: Yeah, there's one man was outside yesterday just like scraping up like these little piles. Like the roads are pretty much dry and everything. And he's just like scooping up these little things, making a bunch of noise with the metal scooper thing. What's it called? Shovel.

Speaker: yeah And it's just like, strange because there's nothing to pick up. i'm like, dude, what are you doing? That's what people do when they're retired and have no purpose in life. I don't think he was that old. going to scoop the sidewalk. of wait what? Did you help him out? work Did you help him out, Brittany?

Speaker: $20 is $20. $25. Don't talk me down. but Not really, because you're going to get taxed on that $20. He doesn't even know what tax is. Okay.

Speaker: Dementia is a fucked up thing. Dementia is a hell of a drug.

Speaker: Honestly, no. i He wasn't even that old. I just think he has nothing better to do. Where the fuck did Glick do? He's back. Back again. That is two minutes. is back ah Kayla. i was was trying something on for New Year's Eve.

Speaker: she was trying something on for new year's eve Ooh, she couldn't wait. So he got his two minutes in, like i said. Exactly. Oh, was it a Bigfoot costume? Was she wearing a Bigfoot costume? She was. Oh, my gosh. There needs to be, like, a little sexy Sasquatch. Yeah, she's in a little little bikini. ah you You guys are doing a little furry session, Oh, I knew it. I knew it. I fucking knew Squatch on Squatch 11.

Speaker: so joke about that and It's like

Speaker: it's like I'm just gonna crap me out Or do you want to go with what we're saying? Yeah, exactly. I mean, Brittany will see it New Year's Eve. it's not like It's not like anything like that's only calm down. Yeah, I'm filming. It's part of her New Year's Eve outfit.

Speaker: Pearl necklace?

Speaker: That'll be later in the night. Oh boy. I don't know why I joke with you like this because every time you respond, I just feel like I want to throw up. You you constantly open the door.

Speaker: It's because it's Kayla. She's hot. She's too hot for you. I agree. My ex-wife said she's way too nice for me. And I said, you're right. She is erna she said she's way too good for me. And I said, you're right.

Speaker: I agree. She's better than you. and now know she's She's too good for me. My ex-wife and I have a great relationship, by the way. So I can say fucked up things to her and she'll just laugh at me because I'm stupid.

Speaker: You guys realize it wasn't meant to be? Pretty much. Yeah, basically. After, yeah. No, we get along great. She likes Kayla. That's how I was with my ex-fiance until he thought that maybe we would get back together. Which was like wish there a lot about that, too, because she didn't like anybody. i shit Courtney has not liked anybody that I was with. Courtney?

Speaker: That was my ex-wife. Oh, oh, oh. Oh, wait. oh I've said her name on here before. It don't matter. Yeah, just names are hard with you It's hard to follow. Courtney's my ex-wife.

Speaker: She ain't liked any of my my girlfriends. So the fact that she likes Kayla speaks volumes. Kayla's dope. and I will say out of all the eight people.

Speaker: dick This is a true statement. No, I am being honest. I joke about it, but Kayla's dope. Kayla said, why wouldn't she like me? And you said she's dope, which both factual statements.

Speaker: just call my Now I take it back. Why wouldn't she like me? But you know what? That's something I right used was talking about my ex-wife. Oh, Jesus Christ. Not always about you. Oh, Mandy. Get up here. Get up here. Mandy, Mandy, Mandy, Mandy. Bridges made a guard. Like the rest of yeah my my me fine gra chart I said guard.

Speaker: Hey, at least I caught myself before you could make fun of me. If you're going to spew, spew into this.

Speaker: Wayne's World. not a fan of that. um Yeah. but were burn Oh, yeah. Excellent. excellent sorry i'm Party on, Wayne. Party on, Garth. Mandy. Apparently, they're supposed to be making a new one. No way. Get the fuck out of here.

Speaker: Are they bringing back Mike Myers? and Yeah, Mike Myers and the other dude. What the hell is that guy's name who was way more successful than Mike Myers? Dana Carvey. Yeah, Dana Carvey.

Speaker: That would be dope as hell they bring back Mike Myers. Fuck yes, dude. He's thinking about bringing it back. Hell yeah. I'm in. i don't think either one of them have aged much. you know Not really. Not really, to be honest with you. Not really. But I mean, Wayne's Road and a nursing home. I'm in. Hell yeah.

Speaker: Love me a nursing home. Wayne's Road with a walker. Let's go. Party on, Wayne. Party on, guard. Take them to that woman. through whale wheels what i going you I mean, they did it with Bill and Ted when Keanu Reeves and that other guy who hasn't done anything since Bill and Ted were like 60 years. Yeah, I was going to say, don't think he's ever been in anything ever other than Bill and Ted. I've not seen the new one, though.

Speaker: Wasn't he in Lost Boys? The new... I think he was in some weird movie where where they were like at a freak show and he got trapped there and they turned him into a freak or something like that.

Speaker: The other guy from Bill and Ted? Yeah. What the fuck was that guy's name? there ah I almost said Sean Penn, not Sean Penn. I thought you almost said Sean Penn. That's the only time you see his face.

Speaker: I did not realize he was in Lost Boys. together. right yeah and he was in lost one i did not realize he was in lost boys i used to love that movie it has that great theme song you had boys oh I don't remember what theme song is, but...

Speaker: I'm just thinking of the like it's Shut up, Brittany Are you talking about the song Cry Little Sister? Cry Little Sister I don't know if that's what it's called But I just know the Lost Boys song is so fucking like That sticks in my head so much That's the first thing I think when you say Lost Boys That song is the first thing that pops in my head Cry Little Sister is great That's sick. I didn't know. what is I'm going to it. I'll have to ah to send you. Don't let me forget. I'll send you a badass version of that song.

Speaker: It's a band that I've tried to get on for a long time. they didn a cover of it and they fucking killed it. I think it was Ava Under Fire. Ava Under Fire is the band. Fucking murder. Hmm.

Speaker: but well yeah he Oh, no, Corey Feldman was in the law. Yeah, Corey Feldman was, yep, for sure. Did you hear Corey Feldman said that Corey Haim molested him?

Speaker: But back in the day, they said they were both molested by other people, and now he's saying that the other Corey molested that Corey. What's going on here? It's a lot of Corey on Corey action. Ooh, I'd pay for that.

Speaker: ah Put it on our OnlyFans Put that on the Lazy Clicks Jedi bitch Damn would Oh my gosh Lazy oh The Lonely Island Boys sort I'm just an island boy Well we were talking about like Adam Sandberg Right on the hands like but Andy whatever Andy Sandberg or whatever Steve you fucked up too Brett hey Megan you're just in time we're talking about fucking Megan's here you guys I'll see you guys later bye she's just in the chat calm down ah but yeah no yesterday he said

Speaker: Because I was talking about the low Lonely Island. island And then he added boy the a boys. The He makes both of them together. Imagine. though a man oh just a man That's a lot of tattoos.

Speaker: Is it though? Lacey just wanted a dick in a box. A dick in a box. Yeah, dick in a box. This is not me. This is your one job on Saturday night. It's Night Live! Welcome! um ah The one that's going to talk all over us. Let's go.

Speaker: a ah James, if I wanted an arsehole to speak, I would have spoken to you. Hey, I was a about to wish you Merry Christmas. Holy shit, man. Yes, Glick, just dropping in, brother, watching some sport, but just wanted to wish you guys all the best.

Speaker: so yeah Merry here Christmas, For Christmas, I'll try to send you guys some snow in Australia.

Speaker: like at a hundred We are degrees one in the afternoon. Celsius?

Speaker: that's far and hike it's about its thirty nine and a half celsius that yeah yeah she took that off the dome Impressive. I was going to Google it. That's some good dome she got there. She's like, I'll prove it. ways Yeah, I like that dome. Every time my I have a best friend up in Canada and British Columbia. Every time he tells me. every time And my car is Canadian apparently too because it's my degrees are going to Celsius.

Speaker: Yeah. So I have to like Google it. You can do conversions. I got a new phone for Christmas. You can't actually do it. We'll let you do it for, honey. All frustrated and orientated. Yo, Shaman, stop your banging. Yeah, I think Shaman's home now. He's probably getting stuck. Shaman, quit banging things, Shaman. yeah I'm opening up my gluten.

Speaker: I was opening up my gluten cream. I'll be that cheese. okay Hang on. James and Jedi are jealous of your banging, Shaman. Can you please? coming out. I'll never be jealous of Shabby's face. Come on, Jedi. Again, you give me a word like that and expect me not to answer it. Come on, fella.

Speaker: Damn it, Megan. Degrees in Minneapolis. Fish. we be yeah Have you had a nice cold beverage and hang out with us and we'll warm you up, buddy. Yes, Degrees here in Annapolis.

Speaker: Although, having said that, 39, it's change. it is rich its It is a refreshing 70 degrees in Casa de Glick.

Speaker: Casa de Casa de Glick. That sounded so wrong in my head when I just said it myself, Glick. It must be in translation.

Speaker: okay Casa de Glick. No, I know Casa is home in Spanish, but just the way I said it in my head... Well, that terror it's that it's that Australian accent that makes Yeah, I was going to say it's got to be the accent, right? But yeah. inside Oh, you know what? I've always wondered that about. Is your inside voice, does it have an accent?

Speaker: I don't use it that often, so don't know, Glick. Like when you're thinking in your head, like... Oh, you mean my head... I call that my head voice, Glick. I've never noticed, but I keep being told I have an accent that I don't hear. Other people hear it. Glick, do the voices in your head have a helmet?

Speaker: yeah I was going to say jane for i was gonna ask about the tinfoil Jedi, but that works. i think Thank you for saying voices first and foremost and not the voice because there are lots of voices. I was thinking more tinfoil than me. and like

Speaker: Sorry. What you were saying about having your accent and your voice, I have a British accent sometimes. I'm not surprised. One of the voices has a British accent.

Speaker: But what type of British? The proper, like, royal family British? No, that's disgusting, filthy shit. Like, Manchester. Like, Jersey. spell Merry Christmas, Jersey. Lovely to see you.

Speaker: Oh, Jersey. Merry Christmas, my dad. Where's Jersey? Where's Mo Dog? Yeah, I was going to say, where's Dog? Yeah, was going to say, Mo Dog will be in in a minute.

Speaker: Three, two, three. I don't notice an accent in in my head. It's probably there.

Speaker: there i don't know though my voices. My voices in my head are deaf. It's hard to understand the mother fucker. It's hard to understand your real voice. hard to understand because they're deaf or mute.

Speaker: Three different things. MoDog. We, uh, Michael was in here. no dog you need to go back on the the screen and see Michael's face. Modog in Jersey about an hour and a half ago, Kayla was wondering where they were. Merry Christmas, Jersey Modog.

Speaker: Merry Christmas. I ain't fucking forget And a ho, ho, ho to you. like I can kind of do it.

Speaker: but within an australia exxi Oh, fuck you. You don't get it. Jersey is speaking my words. Thank you, Jersey. broke out of his heart. I'm going to drop down, guys. Not because Jersey and I don't in here. You're going to drop down under? Down under? Down under. Down under you, darling.

Speaker: who she writes She's a bottom. She's a bottom. What, Ryan? No. No. oh That's scary. I did not like that answer. Yeah, I just wanted to come up and wish everyone Merry Christmas.

Speaker: Whatever. Jesus Christ, John, are you building a woodshed? Merry Christmas, Megan. Merry Christmas.

Speaker: hopefully i'll see you hopefully i'll see you well i'll see jedi from elsewhere but before i go on my trip at the end of january oh the trip that jedi was supposed to make but he didn't uh no that's the trip to sydney the delorean bridge so i can back and forget i ever met jedi uh that's okay wouldn't that be wonderful For me, it's going to be my birthday and Christmas wish combined, Jedi. My kid. All right. That's two-fer. Have good night, Megan. Thanks for taking a while. Brittany, why are you fingering Megan at the end like that? Because you're jealous, and he knows that you are. She's trying to leave. Shut up, Jedi.

Speaker: I can't feel it. Have a good night, Meg. i give it to me modo I'm not getting in trouble. I see what you're trying to do there.

Speaker: So Kayla was asking where you and Jersey were.

Speaker: ah last name is Alcy. When people hear my friends. it Alcy. Hey, so like, do you know that chick, she's a mom and she like,

Speaker: does music with the kids toys and stuff like that. i did that i've seen I've seen that. I think that she does the parodies. Yeah. I'm trying to talk to her. I reached out to i you No way.

Speaker: There's there's a another young lady who's got an amazing voice and her son is like eight years old and this kid raps and he spits fucking fire.

Speaker: That's cool. Oh, yeah. and She sings like country, and then her little son will come in and grab the microphone and just be like like a little like a little mini M&M, and I'm like, what the fuck? I love that. Bro, you need to send me that. i want to see that.

Speaker: Jersey said, Kayla, my girl, with scissors. oh shit. say jersey Safety first, then teamwork, okay? Just don't run with them. Is it like triple skizzers?

Speaker: Scissor. Oh, man, that could be dangerous. Triple scissor. throwing him around Yeah. That's high stakes. That's high stakes scissoring.

Speaker: I'd pay to see that. Well, never mind. I got it up on my only right There's a gremlin in the triple scissor. I'm just like. man Gross.

Speaker: I'll scissor you, my precious, and your little dog, too. Brittany is my scissor, scissor, scissor, too. Jersey's just scissoring all over the place. What a scissor slure!

Speaker: We're Marvin Scissors. Scissors. That's a hashtag, ScissorsLore. I'd be curious to ask lesbians if that does anything or if that's really effective.

Speaker: um ah Brittany? But I've done it before. fall asleep. I'm going to... I don't know how good they are.

Speaker: no. no

Speaker: Oh, no. Don't you put that evil on me, Ricky Bobby. Ricky Bobby. guess I'm the only one that can answer it. I got sleep on the couch tonight. It does a little bit, but I wouldn't say.

Speaker: Crowd scissors, Lord. ah yeah You accidentally kick each other in the face. All the time. it's That's the hot part.

Speaker: It's not the on lip action. It's the face kicks that really get you going. Oh, yeah. Finish her. wow Right in the kisser. You say kiss her scissor? over up Here we go.

Speaker: Oh, snap. What's up, motherfuckers? What's up? Oh, shit. Oh, God. Great grandpa's in room. That's right, Grandpa's here. Keep you motherfuckers in line. This scissor king has arrived. He puts a big old smile on her face, Moe Dogg.

Speaker: Moe Dogg. What's up, Kayla? How you doing, sweetie? How you doing? Let's bring him up full screen. Can you scissor your mother with that mouth? She got a big old smile on her face and she said, He said my name. He said my name. Let's ram up your bottle to his throat. Thank you, Brittany. fucking slore. What's up, Twadua?

Speaker: How you doing, man? I'm doing pretty good. how how what your I'm drinking fucking hot chocolate, man.

Speaker: Do you have a missing person on your mug? That's my granddaughter when she was like one. yes check the la on this honor i'm i' ah Put me full screen. I'm to try to do this and not spill it on my laptop.

Speaker: sir So when she was in, so this is like a normal picture of her, right? This is my like, my, my hot chocolate mug that I drank that of. Right.

Speaker: So that that's a normal picture of her. And then when she went to daycare the first year, they took books, you they take school pictures. Right. And she had this fucking vile, wicked look on her face. So we all made signs that we like in family. We hold ah each other when we're like, you know, fuck you kind of thing.

Speaker: this This is the picture on the other side. Oh, she's got mad. oh She's getting a of fucking like a straight up yeah the bever years right fighter i she looks' looking at it like, what the fuck you want?

Speaker: you I like that mug. It matches my background. It has the same pattern as you got my... You got my granddaughter on your background? I'm talking about... but He does drive me into a span if that tells you anything.

Speaker: and say You ain't lied around schools yet, James. because yes Yes, it is, Fish. The scissor is ah is a lesbian thing. It's the L of the LBGT.

Speaker: I mean, you know, gay guys can scissor too if they want to. oh I don't even want to think about it. Why do you guys say things like that out loud? Look, but Sean, if like two gay guys got together like that, you know how bad that's going to hurt? Like, you're going to be pushing. There's going to be some road rash, you know? little pushing for the cushion. Our penis was never touched in that picture, Brittany.

Speaker: Yeah, I mean, you tried, but the guts got in the way. Yeah, we tried. Click set. Click set. Imagine the sound it makes when they' their belly button unhocke. That wasn't... That wasn't Lent that was touching. that man Our belly button Lent made a sweater. I gotta drink this hot chocolate so I can get to the beer, man.

Speaker: When we pull our bellies apart, it does go. Yeah. I still wish he would have made it with a credit card sliding down the middle. No, it wasn't. Shut Acting like you got a comedy show week and shit, man.

Speaker: What the What the matter with look sha more tell acting like you got a comedy show next week and shit man the fuck mad oh next hi am not oh think holy fuck daves oh my god what the matter were you I don't know. She's telling jokes to tonight and I'm not feeling too good about her comedy. Uh-oh.

Speaker: Uh-oh. What up with it, Britt? What up with it? good to Get your mind. i jokes out of the way tonight ah Well, I'm trying to go up on the 28th to go to Cleveland.

Speaker: um Well, there's a joke right there. As he drinks from his little hot chocolate. Grandpa, I'm gonna smack down on you, Brett. I don't know why, because it's the truth. Maybe if you find me, I'll get up there so I can get juice warmed up for the next show. Kayla, you better wake your ass up. It's only 9.40. What the fuck? My dog just got here. like What the fuck?

Speaker: right Oh, you like my mug? It's all Fleetwood Mac tapes. Oh, nice. Did you not hear Did you make that or buy it? Is that a new thing where everybody has cool-ass mugs? I need a cool-ass mug. Oh, you don't? Yeah, it's not a new thing, bro. get me beer you just couldn me get up Okay, well, I've never seen so many cool mugs in one place at one time. You've never seen one. Give us a program.

Speaker: I should. My bad. Muggless fucker, you. Muggless fucker. I'm not being muggled. That's pretty harsh, Shaman. I forgive you. You're a muggle.

Speaker: shame don That's a bridge too far. I went blind all a sudden. I can't read comments and shit. i don't know what that says. my gosh. I had to show you man i call what what i had to call a customer earlier And I had to leave our our phone number. And I don't know our phone number, so I tried to look at my business card, but the room was dark.

Speaker: And then it turns out I gave her the wrong number. So she's probably not going to call back. Yeah, i I'm guessing now. She's probably not. Customer Service 101 by Shaman.

Speaker: Yeah, always give out the wrong number. Just pick some randomest fucking number. I used to give out my brother's number if a guy would ask me for mine. Well, that's how I have safe sex, too. I never tell them my real name. i was his Brandon and Brittany. That's my brother's name.

Speaker: no way. Stop. That is so crazy. Jedi doing a little stalking or what, man? This is Brandy. He doesn't even go by that. Somebody's watching me.

Speaker: his nickname is box because Brennan Cox sucks and then in high school he was a senior and I was a freshman they used to call me a little box was like you know long they call me that can't use that one no more can you that's what they call a shaman too hey fuck you right on of course they can they still do stretched out Sally what's up I'm not a small you stretch

Speaker: Did I see Megan up here earlier? yeah Yeah. The fuck? you left She left because you got in the chat. Yeah, she's like, M.O.D.O.K. here. That is ironic.

Speaker: That happened the last time I was on some other network, too. As soon as we showed up, bunch people dropped. I'm like, whatever. How many networks do you go on? ah Just this one, now. Two. Friggin' four.

Speaker: Slower. Just this one. Five.

Speaker: Jedi's occasionally. That song's to be stuck in my head now. Damn it. Twad, what have you been up to, man? Chasing little kids and fucking Bigfoot or what? Chasing Bigfoot. Chasing Bigfoot?

Speaker: What's up, Glick's pretty slow, man. You'll catch him. yeah I was going to say, you can just speed walk. It's easy to catch the fucker. just bring out a 12-pack of beer and a cheeseburger. 12-pack of beer, drop your drawers down around your ankles, bend over a log.

Speaker: Just like that.

Speaker: Damn it, Jedi. Ow, fucker. I've done nothing. exactly no mean it's not like it's not good to drink hot chocolate this fast it's just giving me heartburn stop putting peanut butter on your pecker and the dog won't bite you there Shaman

Speaker: well I was using jelly so you're gonna get a yeast infection Shaman KY jelly is not the right jelly to be using oh did you know that I can strip the the paint off your car what's that drag cum Oh, K-Y jelly? butter and so even Same, same.

Speaker: Oh, goddamn. That's why all the cars in Cleveland don't have any fucking paint on them.

Speaker: But, and then you think, like, at least on the door handles. thing inside of You and know what I mean? Like, I don't know what you mean. I've never had KY Jelly inside of me. Yeah, I haven't been there yet. If you have paint inside you, that's a good way to get it out, I guess. I don't need it.

Speaker: I mean, if you got that Gorilla Glip grip, you're pulling paint off of shit. i girl You're not wrong with the Glip, though. Glip. Gorilla Glick. Gorilla Glick.

Speaker: If you guys want to make it about him and not the lips, that'd be terrible.

Speaker: He's not even here make fun of him. Yeah, we fucked. We ran Glick off, too. What the fuck? Yeah, fuck that guy. Don't come on for a week, and he's like, fuck you, man. I'm leaving.

Speaker: Yeah. Pretty selfish of him. Yeah, what a douche. He's out there running with scissors right now. Hey, man, don't be mad at a douche because at least they clean pussy. That's true. Or buttholes in your case. Oh, shit. Ha ha, joke's on you. I don't use one. ha My shit's dirty. He's like, ha ha, I don't have a clean butthole.

Speaker: He's like, I don't have a butthole or a face. Jedi,

Speaker: what have you been up to, man? did you do the fucking hot honey thing or mad honey or whatever? No, no, no. I got to reschedule with Drew. I don't know. the hot wax. Yeah, I do the hot candle wax. The hot camel toe? That's only on the OnlyFans page, so you got to subscribe to see it.

Speaker: Behind. He did the hot candle wax challenge with Drew. Whoa, bitch. I swear to God, Shaman, every time I fucking hear you, you're either at a fucking zoo or a fucking junkyard. or Right? ro just This is my fucking house. This is what I go through. like No relaxation.

Speaker: And I don't even live with anybody. What the fuck? Well, I meet him every once in a while. Yeah, now I'm as cool as Shaman. I don't have my camera on. You fucking spoilers can't see me. Yeah, that's what's up, baby. Join the crew, baby. Let's go.

Speaker: Goddamn. Hang on. Let me pull up TikTok. They're scissoring backstage. That's why neither of them are on camera. They call me Sha Glick up in this motherfucker. Oh, Glick. Not right there, Glick. They call him Sticky Glick.

Speaker: Sha Glick. Sha Glick. is that Is that what it sounds like? Sha Glick. Sha Glick. Sha Glick. noise it chilis tiling that's what sounds like diamond following it goes shcyclic doesn't play Man, I feel like I need to wear my sunglasses on. I need to put my sunglasses You need to put your fucking scali on, too, man. I'm going to put my scali on. going to put your moon glasses on, bro.

Speaker: Well, what want to be a little moodog? What if I want to be a god motherfucking pale? Well, if you want to be god motherfucking pale, you do it.

Speaker: You can do that. A little fedora. I like that. That's good. Oh, sorry. That looks good, man. That's why I said it was badass. Bitch, I got a fedora. Let me go find that motherfucker. I think it's very cute. Hang on. I'll be right back. See, I told you asshole Shaman would be here tonight and he'd have my back. That's what we're best. Yeah, he definitely will have your back.

Speaker: thats yeah Oh, yeah. Best friends for life. Yeah, I got your back because you've got my front. No. Whoa. Does it get hot in here or is it just me?

Speaker: That is a big front. Oh, it's hot. It's shaman in here the bb So take off all your face.

Speaker: Yeah, British broadcasting coffee. Big broadcasting coffee. Jersey said, I got Kayla's This the Cox Broadcasting Network. Yeah, bitch. See, you ain't the only motherfucker with a fedora.

Speaker: I just have one of mine. Looks stupid as fuck with a hoodie. Hold on, let me get my fedora. And I can't put my earphones on on.

Speaker: That would be the most recorded thing ever. Next click, we're to try out our thongs. We're going see how our thongs work. Oh, save that for the after party. Save it for the after party. What color is your thong, though, dog?

Speaker: James is about to slip some loonies into your fucking waistcoat. What color is your bugatti? What color is your bugatti? James is like, no. No, fuck that.

Speaker: James is about to go loony on your toonie, okay? That's all I'm saying. It's hard being as fucking handsome, but god damn, somebody's got to fucking do it. I got i mean, you're bearing the brunt of...

Speaker: Yeah, thank you, MoDog, because like you you carry the weight for all of us, and we really appreciate it. I know, I know, I know. I can't even hold a face, let alone, you know. gosh. Bitch, I got a cowboy hat, too, motherfucker. Oh, my gosh. I figured you would. You better watch it.

Speaker: ah you mo you mayor MoDog is like every character in the YMCA. Exactly. I'm trying not to match MoDog tonight, but it just keeps happening. He's like, oh, you got a cowboy? Mine's brown, though. And I won't put on. It's actually too small. He's not going to take to brown town. That's what she said.

Speaker: That's because Shaman doesn't use a douche. that correct That's what I asked, bro. Hey, Glick, tell Kayla to throw some love fucking Jersey's way. That bitch got COVID again and shit, man.

Speaker: What? I said bitch in a nice way. Are you vaccinated, Jersey? Fucking fake news. Throw some love her way in the comments. Jersey, did you get vaccinated? Is she vaccinated? I got vaccinated. Yeah, she's a hospice nurse, man. She got to be vaccinated.

Speaker: Yeah, that's why she keeps getting COVID. yeah Hey, hey. It's not the same as it like the more you get it. It's just more like a... Actually, she got it from her dad. Her pops is in the hospital. I was just joking about that. This is not medical advice. We're laughing right now.

Speaker: I'm waiting for him to do cowboy hat because I'm on number two and I've got two more to go. but Yeah, see the one I got? like i no fuck you Fuck you. Hang on. Who's who's got the construction worker hat? Who's got the hard hat? I got a hard hat in my truck.

Speaker: I'll be right back I have to wear a hard hat at work I feel like fucking such a special needs kid when I put it on yeah yeah I did commercial roofing that shit feels so stupid to wear we have to lot of our job sites as soon as we get out of our trucks we have to have them on yeah like whatever there i'm I'm not a fan of hard hats. My head's harder than this fucking hard hat. I'll be fine.

Speaker: But the rules are rules.

Speaker: They're there for your protection, sir. They're there for... like That's what they say about condoms.

Speaker: Oh, I was saying COVID is fake. I wasn't saying your dad's in the hospital. You're... I can't say that. I don't excellent Oh, wow. What a run. I got the baby COVID booster.

Speaker: johnson and johnson

Speaker: but So yeah no tears on that, huh? your No tears. Best wishes to your dad. Yeah, I worked for a company that said either get the shot or you don't have a job. and Unfortunately, I'm not in a position to go, well, fuck your job.

Speaker: I don't care. it was just It is what it is. I didn't have COVID. I never got COVID. Well, I got COVID like two years after COVID. There you go. There's Kayla. Yeehaw, motherfucker.

Speaker: Well, that is way too small for your big fucking jargon. Yeah, it is. I was weighing out my options if it came to that. Luckily, it didn't. But I was ready to go probably get another job.

Speaker: Yeah, well, I didn't. Unfortunately, that was... My my hats are dusty as shit. Here, i got I got one I bet you don't have, man. Nah, I mean, yeah, it's just... ah name I do not love the Kentucky Derby hat.

Speaker: Here's my Budweiser one. Hey, hey, MoDog. That one's fitting. but I love this one, and I don't know why. This is one of my favorite ones. yeah i got my Yeah, I got hats here that I buy for, like, people that are coming for doing, like, photo shoots and shit. That's where that cowboy hat come from. It wasn't actually from me.

Speaker: You just threw a cowboy hat on, and I was like, fuck, I got one of those. Yeah. I need to get a new one. I want to get me a gray one and I gotta i get a new black one. I haven got a cowgirl hat.

Speaker: I have a cowgirl hat. I have like the little dangly things around. can't see you, Britt. too dark. man I don't have a cowgirl hat. Reverse cowgirl in our lazy Jedi's OnlyFans.

Speaker: There you go. There you There's a scully for you. There you go, Dude, I love this hat. yeah So do I. I've got... I showed kayla the person i got eight i got eighty of them motherfuckers now, man. yeah I just got one. The first time I showed Kayla, she went, I don't know. And then I put it on and she was like, shit.

Speaker: My grandpa used to wear them a lot. So it's not... I don't it's i like them. I have a couple of them. Obviously, girls. Don't really wear them. Hopefully your dad gets feeling better too, Jers.

Speaker: Yeah, he's pretty sick. he's got He's got the vid, man. But he's doing better today than he was yesterday. so that's good That's a good sign. He only plays dress up for me, Jersey. Why don't you in your scissor and snores just leave us alone?

Speaker: Yeah, pics and video or didn't fucking happen, babe. Just saying. You know, I wonder if that's what my boss... You're the photographer. yeah I know, but if i were good but if I was the one doing it, the motherfuckers would be all blurry and shit, because I'd be... Are you beaten? You'd be beaten. and No, I'd be assisting. might be beaten, too. Unfortunately, she's she's not paying much attention to your man, and that's my fault. and I didn't realize I was going to...

Speaker: She'll be back. so She'll be back for a rally. We we still got we still got four hours. Kayla will be back. She's napping. She's taking little nappy poo.

Speaker: Oh, nap and a poo. That's good. some nation It's usually good poo and nap, but... See, you get to be grandpa's age. You do them both at the same time sometimes. It's the same. Yeah, no, you're right. As I was saying not she's saying. She was very disappointed that you and MoDog were not going to be at New Year's Eve.

Speaker: She was like, how do we get MoDog in Jersey at New Year's Eve? was like, don't know. She didn't give fuck about nobody. Yeah, so they would have up for you guys and not the actual comedy show. Fucked up.

Speaker: oh is there a comedy show on New Year's Eve?

Speaker: Where at? Apparently there's ah there's a Glick meet and greet. Who's the performer? Glick. Glick, you got that wrong. It's the Glick beat his meet.

Speaker: That's private. Ew. That's going to be his 30 minute set just sitting up on stage. Just kicked back. Oiled up. yes you think he know for thirty minutes get crazy No No jokes. done you know okay Well, his set's 30 minutes. He's going to be done in two. 29 will be trying to get it up.

Speaker: and And then the last minute. Then it'll be like, ta-da! yeah get There will be no flowers. I'll get it up just fine and then after two minutes I'll be like, so what do we do for the next 28 minutes? Who wants to come up here and fucking cuddle with me?

Speaker: <unk>tle and gotle you big spoon he's gonna moves cuter them with they're Who's my big spoon?

Speaker: I'm pretty sure that would be Scotto. I ain't mad at it. Glick feels something on his back. Scotto's like, that ain't a ladle, motherfucker.

Speaker: shit good You can scrape it off once it dries. Calm down. James, this is the most quiet I've ever seen you on a panel, man. Did you get all quiet because I came up, man?

Speaker: He's been quiet all night. He's nervous. Yeah, I didn't even realize he was on panel for like the first 30 minutes. It's his first time here. Well, it's not his first time here. But but his ah in his mind, in his regulation, it's his first time here. like Yeah, well, he's been on and he's been on the Lady Shaman show, so he's familiar with us.

Speaker: should feel comfortable I'm a little high. I'm a little high. I'm a little jealous because apparently you're really fucking high right now. yeah James has been up here quite a few times on Nonsensical Network. hello Man, you got to work New Year's Eve and New Year's Day.

Speaker: you know He's high. you know how I got to work New Year's Eve and Christmas. mean like agree don't have to. Jersey, there's no such thing as eating too many crayons.

Speaker: I'm leaving. I do if I want to keep my thing. Taking a half day on New Year's Eve and I took the day after New Year's Eve off.

Speaker: Or the day after New Year's off. So you had a choice. And you're like, fuck them. Fuck. I said fuck it. I ain't going to work either fucking day. Oh, that's right. I'm unemployed.

Speaker: say actually I'm off the rest of the year. I'm excited. Oh, cheers. Fuck that place. Just quit. and go with up number i Basically, you could go to work, but you're not going to get paid for it.

Speaker: No, I'm getting paid not to work, actually. It's great. no i'm so mo

Speaker: He said lazy. No, he said lazy. No, trust me. it ain't It ain't a lazy thing. It's an age thing. Nobody wants to hire a fucking 60-year-old that's been in the workforce for a long time. Jedi.

Speaker: moug i will hire everyone romanman is i um a year video walmart reader we can i get a walmart greet there i get I get interviews out the ass, man. I average three or four interviews a week.

Speaker: Let's be a pro. Quit interviewing with your ass. You should use your face. No, that's what I'm going to start doing. I'm going to start grabbing my ass cheeks make my fucking butthole talk to them, man.

Speaker: cut my singlele venture when he does the yeah s You next up je to see you just live on love, you and Moe Dog. On a beach somewhere, because I'm about to be homeless like a motherfucker.

Speaker: earlier I'll hire you. What kind of skills we got, bro? What kind of beer are you drinking tonight? I'll show you. There's no pay here on the Nonsensible Network. but all No, i I don't have that beer, so fuck you, Britt.

Speaker: as you swallow what kind of beard you you got bo on what are we drinking bowog how are you on miller set Miller High Life, to you know, 11 bucks for fucking 12-pack. Cheap shit. yeah Hell yeah, High Life's the best, man. We're trying to get a 12-pack for 11 bucks. Well, I'm trying not to drink my fucking bourbon and shit, man. I'm trying to reserve it, you know. You know, it's only $15 for a 12-pack of Miller Lite 16-ouncers.

Speaker: yeah but That's shit. That just tastes like shit. so i think i told you I told you last time I was on here. i'm not ah i I mean, i've been I seem to be a big beer drinker because I've been drinking a lot of beer on on the Saturday panels with you guys, but I'm really not a big beer drinker. About the only time I do drink is when I'm on here with you guys. so Drink your bourbon. I almost got a beer.

Speaker: Well, I can buy beer a lot cheaper than I can buy fucking bourbon. No, depending on what the bourbon you buy. Yeah, I don't drink shit bourbon, man. so It's too late to buy anything but beer. We were on the box today. We had to stop at the vape shop.

Speaker: I had a humidor in there and I almost went in and got me a Buffalo Trace. Cigar. oh that's good. I like Buffalo Trace. I've only had it once. I don't know much about cigars. I'm not that guy. like I don't know. i'm not i'm not I've never smoked a cigar in my life.

Speaker: I love those Buffalo Trace cigars. I know that they that they soak the papers that they wrap it in in Buffalo Trace. And I like Buffalo Trace.

Speaker: That's a leaf. They wrap them in a leaf. Yeah, it's a leaf. I don't I like to empty out. yeah Yeah, make you a big old fat blunt. yeah yeah I remember them days. yeah I was doing that shit before you were even borning girl but dog was born, girl. I was smoking bloods with your ancestors, bitch. and's true You were already in the grave before I was born. I 80 years ago in my twenty s You know? go but

Speaker: yeah that and yeah meeting oh you're talking about the maybe so we arere we're at We're actually to auction off Mo Dog's ass. We'll start the deal. Is that going to be the new couch?

Speaker: Hey! I like how you got my jazz hands and shit on that one. Spreading the ass.

Speaker: I see what you did there. That's how you get to the dingleberries. Are we going to make a Scotto sandwich? That would be interesting. I've been waiting for that. I brought that up. The scissoring floors over here and and then it's me, you, and Scotto.

Speaker: that Sounds like a rugby team. Alright. Chocolate's gone. I'm going to grab a beer.

Speaker: Now we're going to fun. And I'm going to cut my dingleberries real quick, too. I'm going to trim them dinghies. like the jersey little day do that Wax them off, bro. All I got to say is that's true love because without hesitation, Jersey said, I'll cut your dingleberries off.

Speaker: I mean, apparently it wasn't. Nasty. not You really love that, man. He had a lot of money, didn't he? Oh, no, you said he was broke crackhead. Yeah, no. That was a different one. Really? That motherfucker broke and you're cutting dingleberries off his ass. Only the brokies have the dinghies, okay? Yeah. don't really know to... I'll cut your dingleberries for crack!

Speaker: No, no. False. Great balls. Gives you wings. we got dinle bears i'll cut them binggo bearries yeah the dinggo bears You got dollar? You got a dollar? i cut them dingies.

Speaker: Way to make it sound sophisticated, Britt. Well, it's like these schnozberries. Tastes like schnozberries. But instead, it's dingleberries. You boys like Mexico?

Speaker: Okay, there's too many fucking Super Trooper references. I'm going to have to watch that later tonight. I can't not watch it now. Are you really not? The next motherfucker that says shenanigans, I swear to God, I'll fucking pistol with them. Hey, what's that restaurant? You like with all the shit on the walls? Oh, you mean shenanigans? He hands them the gun.

Speaker: Son of a bitch. How dare you, Gleick?

Speaker: to put a different color one on with each ah piss change and beer change. Oh, I love that. That's good. Mix it up. Keep us guessing. i I could do that with ball caps. I could literally...

Speaker: change ball caps what balls or or ball bags whichever yeah tea bags tea bag me all that we have like little hooks for each of your hats i do make me harder daddy as tell him jedi tell him i love when your bag bounces off of my forehead o yes Yes, papi. Oh, papi. Oh, God. i didn't I don't like Onisic Spanglish. Okay. Oh, my God. I love papi.

Speaker: Oh, God.

Speaker: You're right, Jersey. I i do have to clean his butthole in the world. Clean his butthole in the world. Hashtag shenanigans. Welcome to Saturday Night on the Nonsensical Network. and I am the shenanigans. Oh, I almost said a word that sounded way too close to another word. I'm not allowed to say. He's the only one that's allowed to laugh at that, too. You should have said you say Say it. Say it. Say it.

Speaker: What happened? No, I can't say it without thinking of the word I'm not allowed to say. Yeah, i and now if you said it, it wouldn't be right. You would have just gone with it. Now it's just dirty.

Speaker: Run, bitch, run. Yeah, it's tainted now. Yeah, it's tainted.

Speaker: He hesitated. that Never hesitate. Suspect. Wicks are racist. that Words are hard.

Speaker: Words are hard, too. that See, Jedi, what's happening is people are typing and sitting in chat and people are reading them and stuff. I know you don't get the concept. so Wait, i you know what? Someday I'm going to learn to read. It's going to be fine we for your i' We're going figure it out on a lazy chat. Last Friday, I dropped a chat in the and the in their their chatter's board.

Speaker: The chat in the chat? The chat in the chat box? yeah and chatbo And then it was like Tuesday, Jedi text he texted me, and he was like, hey, that was a great chat you put in there.

Speaker: I totally forgot what I said. Shaman gets it. You know that that is how it is here with us. like sometimes doing No, not. Not as bad as Jedi, but... can't you Yes, you can. do You just got to concentrate, babe.

Speaker: just go to the like It'll be okay. That player for my hooked-on funnels runs out of battery really quick, okay? and so when it dies You got you got brit Britt up here. Y'all can talk about dingleberries and buttholes and shit.

Speaker: Get it and shit? ah I was just going to say, it all just kind of works for itself. It just flowed together. it is well you asking I masturbate through this every weekend while we're alive.

Speaker: That's why can only see me from here up. That's why it's always so noisy when I drive. Hey, Twaddle, when you look in the mirror and see that fucking Santa Claus on there, do get excited and shit?

Speaker: you Yeah, he's... Or do you get scared because it says police department? I just read the police department, Bert. Oh, I'm not in those ways.

Speaker: I mean, back yeah now youll actually, Christmas is canceled. Santa got busted. Hey, depend you know, there are some countries in the world where they're canceling shit left and right because they're fucking scared all the bullshit going on. yeah you have No, but i did hear our voice i did hear on the news, though, that Santa got ran over by a reindeer.

Speaker: Oh, yeah it was tragic. On his way to grandma's house. All right. I have received i had received my first... Snapchat from Scotto of the night. lo What's he saying? What's he saying? You motherfucker! I have to do this. Show it. I am a sexy man. Show it. even You know what? you know' what that challenge yeah Go ahead and twist that.

Speaker: know that I deserve it after what we do to MoDog. Hold on a second. right finally finally some fucking justice damn no justice no peace i no no peace you guys give him so much shit about oh you never do anything bad for Glick you never do anything bad to Glick and he finally caught me slipping

Speaker: oh lord have mercy even he does have mercy so now show it But he hasn't he isn't he hasn't done anything with it yet. yeah He just sent me the picture.

Speaker: Why don't you click? Now click this. You've got to click it. me but like You've got to get it nice and wet so you can kick it. Damn it, Glick. What is going on?

Speaker: Hold on a second. I know how all you guys can see this.

Speaker: Full screen yourself. You full screen me. I always full screen you. I know you do. That sucks, to Abby. Scotto. He said his power's up. Oh, man. You're making Modog look like an amateur.

Speaker: Yeah. But I will say this. I will say this. Scotto did say... You can't anything with that deep in your throat. Well, Scotto did say... Oh, no, no, no, no.

Speaker: I am a sexy man. You're not wrong, Scotto. And I appreciate you for acknowledging that. There he is. There's my sweet Scotto. Fix yourself, kids. Power is out in half the city, so I'm on my phone.

Speaker: Scotto, you're a power plant in your own right. You don't need them. What up, Scotto, you motherfucker? I mean, what up, Scotto? ah Whoa, you deleted your South Carolina?

Speaker: That's fucking crazy. She deleted the whole state and said, fuck it. What the fuck? That's power right there. Now North Carolina is just twice as big. What?

Speaker: Is it still North Carolina or is it just Carolina? I guess it's, yeah, it could be just Carolina. They should just combine them. We don't need any North and South anymore, okay? It's just be the Dakotas. Dakota and Carolina.

Speaker: Fuck off with your North and South.

Speaker: And we get rid of Minnesota. And we don't need West Virginia and Virginia. Just Virginia, okay? Elongated Virginia. Virginia. What did you do that for, Jerz?

Speaker: That's what I said. and I don't know what's going on. Like Jedi said. That's what I want to move back to. Social media or overload.

Speaker: It'd be like that sometimes. Vagina. I mean Virginia. It'd be like that sometimes. Virgin, vagina. I think we need to get rid of the new names, too. like is it Is New York really new anymore? It's not. No. Nothing's new.

Speaker: It's all those fucking New England states, man. They just took all the you know English fucking names of put new on it. ah hu New Hampshire New Connecticut Way to be original founding four fathers New Glick Yeah four and a half fathers No my head cough No my head cough I did slur that Jesus Christ I haven't eaten I think so The rapture is here He's back

Speaker: oh I was sorry. I'm getting getting sports notifications. And, course, Ole Miss did what we expected. Ole Miss to Tulane, I did, Jersey. You caught that. can't even count 41, Blake. Why are you even talking about it?

Speaker: current Currently in the third quarter, Oregon is up over... Which organ? The liver? The kidneys? The one you know.

Speaker: The in the church. yeah now The one that we get our money from. Yes, that That up. That's important for performance. That's a very important organ.

Speaker: Gotta get up to get down, you know what mean? Jedi just bought his fourth house from that organ. Fourth house, yeah.

Speaker: Meanwhile, I'm over here slumming it. Slumlord millionaire. Why don't you sell some of them belts behind you? Because I'm the champ, bitch.

Speaker: Those are the money makers. He wears them during our videos on OnlyFans. That's what brings the viewers in. likeck only fans yeah im like Well, Glick, I challenge you to a last He challenges you to man ah Yeah, but you see, that's... I already have undefined advantage because every time you would, like, accidentally come into my personal bubble, you would apologize.

Speaker: Don't come in his bubble. Yeah, don't. I'm sorry for hitting you know Why are you coming in my bubble? You want some of that? What? What? What?

Speaker: but Oh, yes, the macho. You can't steal me. That's what say about my penis. what Fuck John Cena. He's an asshole. John Cena's a total asshole. I say old boy got his fucking jaw broke last night trying to act like he was a boxer.

Speaker: You know what? He was just on his knees just hugging his waist. I gotta say his job i got say props to ah to to what's his name? Jake Paul.

Speaker: I've never had my jaw broke but I've had my jaw cracked. And I was not talking as well as he was. Yeah, but he got... Oh, yeah. You give him props for that. Okay. gotta go across andrew Like, literally, I had a fracture in my jaw.

Speaker: And I was like... yeah They didn't say how bad it was broke, though, either. a You know why? Because his adrenaline was fucking going so hard.

Speaker: i put it Yeah, I agree. so because yo His brother actually does a good job as a wrestler. Yeah, Logan Paul's a good wrestler. He's a good performer. I mean, he's a good on the mic. He's good. Yeah, and that's what they are. They're they're performers. They're performers. The problem is boxing is an actual fucking combat sport. What's entertainment?

Speaker: And you know that motherfucker was like, I cannot lose to this son of a bitch. I'm a boxer and he's a fucking YouTuber. Oh, no. He's going to kill him. hundred yeah 100%. AJ was like, going to kill I heard that was really going on his record, but In the pre-stuff, he said, Dashawa said, I want to break his soul.

Speaker: like He basically wants him to give up. He goes, you know when you're boxing somebody and you break their soul because they give you that look. And they they just want you to end the fight. like Please just knock me out or do something.

Speaker: Because I want to end the fight. And that's basically... You saw in the first round, Joshua punched him right in the diaphragm, and it was a blocked punch. He pretty much killed the dude in the second round. He pretty much killed the dude in the second round.

Speaker: There was a couple times that AJ hit him in the right in the sternum. There was a couple few times where he hit him dead ass right center in the sternum. So that liver hit he got? He got that nice liver hit on him.

Speaker: Yeah, he did. I'll tell you what, if you if you don't fight or have never boxed before, you don't realize how much damage fucking body punches do, man. Body punches? They will win a fucking fight. A knockout looks good for the Cameron shit, but the body punches are what wear you fuck down.

Speaker: That's like when when Brock Lesnar came back to the UFC and he had that diverticulitis or whatever. Yeah. And he fought Aleister Overeem. And Aleister Overeem is a monster. like home Yeah, he is.

Speaker: And And Alistair hit him in the gut, and and and Brock was done. Like, ah my my man just came back from having that intestinal bullshit surgery. He basically an Yo, what about CM Punk's MMA career? He only did two matches when he retired. CM Punk's MMA a career was such a joke, man.

Speaker: you Maybe when he was younger. maybe impunk He did m MMA. but However, Bobby Lashley in MMA was an absolute best. Bobby Lashley was apparently pretty good. Jack Swagger, too, was pretty good at MMA. Jack Swagger, from that background.

Speaker: before he... yeah but yeah

Speaker: Ken fucking Shamrock. Ken Shamrock. He's a legend, bro. He was Ken Shamrock was an original UFC fighter back before they had weight classes and shit like that.

Speaker: And then he came to the... Ken Shamrock, to this day, 60-some damn years old, Ken Shamrock is still probably one of the most dangerous men on the planet. He... um if you If you ask me...

Speaker: UFC would not be as popular as it is today if Ken Shamrock did not go into the, I guess it was WWF at the time. Oh, no. The attitude there. The attitude there, Yeah, it was WWF. You're right, Shaman.

Speaker: that's when That's when I learned about mix mixed martial arts was from ken Shamrock going to the WWF. And then I was like, oh shit, that's badass. Because he would come in and whoop people's ass.

Speaker: And you're like, what? There's a whole league of this? And then you know I found the UFC shit. And then, yeah. So, I mean, surely that's how everybody found it. Brock Lesnar learned to be a better striker because he's always been just a world-class wrestler, like amazing. um If he would have got his striking under control, he would have.

Speaker: he's just He just has the strength of you. yeah really He was world class. He's a world class wrestler. All Brock Les could do is just throw people around in the ring. Lesnar was not a not a terrible striker because most of his most of his wins were knockouts.

Speaker: But his wrestling game, was ground and pound, though. That's the thing. He was not a great striker. He was not a great striker, though. like he was He was good. He was big. He could fucking punch hard. But like he didn't grow up doing that. You know what I mean? like It wasn't like a MMA was not like his main wrestling. Wrestling is the foundation for every... like Wrestling is the number one thing you should do if you're going to mixed martial arts.

Speaker: Because even jiu-jitsu people... well If you're a good wrestler... But you jiu yeah, but I'm talking about ground game, but you remember you remember that first time there no injajitsu hot Frank Mir Jiu Jitsu is great too, but wrestling is first time that he fought frank mear he made that its his mormon He got caught in the ankle lock he lost the first not he he knocked Frank Mir down with a strike with a punch He's big dude and he can punch hard, but he's still not a great striker. Yeah, but he stepped wrong and Frank Mir being... Oh, yeah. he's Stuff like that. He was like, oh, there's that ankle.

Speaker: Smash that son of a bitch up. Kimbo Slice. Kimbo Slice. Kimbo Slice. Oh, fucking love that dude. Kimbo Slice was punk. like this video. Mazdao came from ah the street fights too,

Speaker: o osba is a like He was a street fighter, the same as Kimbo Slice.

Speaker: Yeah. I like the Kimbo Slice videos. You'll go up to some random people. Yeah, let me. Here's a couple of thoughts. Let me hit you. See, we did that shit when I was in the Marine Corps, man, before before UFC and MMA and all that shit even existed. We had a thing called Smokers. And if you were a boxer, that's fine.

Speaker: But most of it was it's basically bare knuckle fucking boxing. You know you do five three-minute rounds. We did that in high school. I'll tell you what, wear the fuck out of each other, man, man. That's why my fucking knuckles look the way to fucking do it, man.

Speaker: Yeah, we would do that in high school. But I wasn't a boxer or anything. In the locker room in high school, we would do body-to-body matches. We talk about those body punches and stuff like that. It was all, you never hit anybody in the face. It was all just body shots. How are you guys still talking about this?

Speaker: Alright, let's get back to scissoring. I was the arm wrestling champion. um Let's talk about tampon dementia cycles. I don't know. I just...

Speaker: bra me will and like talk about no meat and i don't know i just like i just i' I'm not joking. I was the high school arm wrestling champ. and None of my opponents showed up. Wait, what was that movie about arm wrestling? What the fuck was that called? Sylvester Stallone? Yeah, another one you're talking about. i can't The one where he's got his kid with him and shit.

Speaker: Yes, yes, yes. He's a truck driver. but like just send rescue me i was the moonwalking champion in high school. Oh, shit. I can see that.

Speaker: I can that. See, I've lost some my skill, but I... i God i damn it, she beat me to it. yeah I started to say I was this, but... I fuck i was see face still yeah like this i was going to say something so mean about Brittany, but I'll just say that she definitely enjoys milkshakes.

Speaker: her in her yard little boys to the yard i don't damn right here yeah like she like an extra small milkshake it's like it was she was the She was the champ of receiving notes and checking the s box in the Oh, that one. oh yeah yeah. I'm not gonna say you're a blowjob champion you're i didn't even do anything with nor me once shame on you

Speaker: Slur me twice, get me a towel. Slur me twice, let me go to the doctor. Slur me three times, put a ring on that motherfucker. Just chilling with penicillin. So what are you doing these days, Britt? You got somebody or are you just out whoring around?

Speaker: what are you doing these days brit you got somebody or you just stop just out hon around I was being serious. Brittany is dedicated to her craft.

Speaker: She's honing her her comedic skills. Yeah, I'm focused on that right now in the afternoon. meeting back um here puppet yo let's hear joke looks's here Back to horn after New Year's.

Speaker: Yeah, back to floor and afternoon. Let's go. New year, new whore. I mean, new Brit. I want hear a joke from Brit. let's You'll have to wait. year, new scissors. She don't give shit away for free.

Speaker: Well, well. wow That was an accident, okay? That I make dance for her. Oh my gosh, he gets off on the fact that he thinks that we're her. Dance, monkey, dance.

Speaker: Who does? It just won't be her comedy online because apparently... It's not going to be live. It'll be out January 7th, I believe. It'll be on VHS.

Speaker: Yeah. Apparently stand-up comedy is not meant to be on social media. But you guys will get to see the the roast live. I mean, that's debatable. There's a lot of comics that get their shit on social media, man.

Speaker: Well, after the fact. They have to have it, like, There's a lot of stand-up comedians. still you do Also, and how much do they get paid? There was a lot stand-up comedians who weren't getting paid anything, and they were just putting their stuff on social media, and then they got super paid. have nothing to do with this. All I know is it has to be edited and all this other shit. yeah You will never... you will never get yeah where her absolute comedy You will see her roast of me on New Year's Eve. Yeah, that'll live. And if you guys are in the comments, this thing I will be safe. If she tells you...

Speaker: If she tells you her jokes now, she'll have to come up with new jokes for her act.

Speaker: I have them all right here. i have like... Well, make up a new one. You can use me as a subject. Come up with a joke about me like right now. Let's put you on the spot. And go. Your face. ah That was funny.

Speaker: She's not your puppet. Thank you. Poke her with a stick. Come on. You have to pay her.

Speaker: you you have to pay her I have made you guys laugh before. There you have it.

Speaker: Sean, you shut your flaps. You shut your flaps first. You shut your flaps. I was shut mine. What are we talking about cooter flaps? Cooter.

Speaker: Hooter Flaps. Whatever you want to think. However, ladies and gentlemen, you can see my comedic genius for free every Saturday night. Right here on the Nonsensical Network. Give us a follow, give us a like, give us a share.

Speaker: Every time he doesn't wear his helmet. is that is that a Is that a separate show from the one I've been coming to? I will say, Glick, you have gotten funnier. I'm winning, baby. like Can't argue that. You used to not be funny.

Speaker: I used to think everything said was really fucking dumb. But now, yeah you you have been saying funnier shit. like I've always been funny. You were just a hater. No.

Speaker: no yeah I'm more of a hater now. See you were aer a later, hater. I think both can be true. Jedi. Look, what i what i what I do here is pure genius.

Speaker: I can't be put on this face. It's pure something. I don't know if it's right. And put a spotlight on me and and and dance for an audience. I just have to be given a camera. You do it yourself and you love it. You're just like,

Speaker: Watch me. I'm unhinged. I'm unhinged. I'm unhinged. He's getting that new good good. Took him to another level. It means he's on hinge. I'm on hinge, baby. kaylee was The right last thing anybody wants is for me to get a microphone on New Year's Eve.

Speaker: my Because they're like professional and then Britney comedians and I'll just embarrass all of them. how many on On the real, how many are up there? i know there's that world winning guy and then you and Michael and who else?

Speaker: And then Tyler Snodgrass, he goes by Snoddy. Snotty's not funny. He's just a teacher. He's funny. Snotty doesn't know. Snotty doesn't know. I've used that jerk against him. That's funny. So what what are you guys doing? Like 10 minute, 15 minute sessions? what what do you like you know I just... I'm sorry. Go ahead. go ahead go ahead i'm sorry Michael is the host so he's going to be like opening up everything and then he's going to do his little bit. I don't know how long he has for his... I have like 5 to 10 minutes.

Speaker: Snotty has something, and then Rob Coleman is the headliner, so he has whatever. All I need to worry about is how long. Okay, well, thank you for the specifics. That was awesome.

Speaker: yeah All I know is about myself and what I'm doing. starting. but um yeah we'll be starting the Doors open at starting should be over by

Speaker: I'll say doors open at 7 and it should be over by 8. Everybody's gone. Fuck these people. It should be over by 8.35. Yeah, we're going through tickets really fast. One drink maximum.

Speaker: Once they get done with Glick, everybody's gone. Well, we have VIP tickets as well. worth they and have beforehand And then we're all having a champagne.

Speaker: canag champagne supernoval They can have champagne. I'll be drinking beer. Or i maybe I'll do a shot of beer. free.

Speaker: Isn't their highlight the champagne of beers? That's what the label says. At Michael's wedding when they did the champagne toast, i didn't I didn't drink champagne. I had my beer.

Speaker: I had a beer and I toasted it. Bro, I went to a wedding. It was a dry wedding at a brewery. That sucks for the fucking bride. How does that even make goddamn sense? But they had like a little champagne flutes or whatever for the cheers and everything.

Speaker: Of course I snuck in my fireball because that's what I was drinking at the time. There are some dry counties like that where they can be distilleries and shit but they can't actually sell alcohol. yeah ironically Ironically, the city that fucking Jack Daniel's in is a dry fucking city.

Speaker: It wasn't because the family didn't sell it. It was just because the family didn't want it. I was like, then why... I mean, I get it's a pretty place, but why would you have your... wife They did it for the aesthetics.

Speaker: I guess. Sorry, that's as gay as I can sound when I talk. I'm going to have to sit down in the funeral soon. Scotto's nipples are hard right now. Oh, I want to... um i I would like to let you... Scotto has a loaded...

Speaker: yeah technology i gotto had ah loaded gun and britney's gonna be so mad at this right now britney's gonna be so mad it's good because i sent her the picture and i said scotto hasn't scott owned it up yet and and i and i seen the notification on my phone and i was afraid to look at it you know what britney out of protest just take your fucking top off fuck it

Speaker: it i was afraid to look at this this uh Snapchat because I thought I was finally going to get mine. Then just fucking show it already, bitch. I'm working on it. He's just like building it up. He's practicing being a tease and shit. He's always working on it.

Speaker: I'm getting it up, alright? Jesus. Yeah. and honestt that last a yet organicly That last one you showed me, it looks just like a picture of you in general.

Speaker: Barely

Speaker: That's what it was. That's what I was. He hadn't... You know what? You're gonna have to have longer because now I've got to go touch myself. Mother. A.K.A. an activist. Damn it, Blake. He's got a tinkle.

Speaker: What a tease. I got a tinkle.

Speaker: Thanks, Blake. He's regal it more than 20 times. this playing with How do you know that was me? Well, since he's in the bathroom playing with himself... e and but I don't know im getting I need to stop it's called deductive reasoning

Speaker: my dear Watson you know what's bad is I bought this shit because it was cheap that whatever two three months ago I've actually developed a fucking taste for it now I actually think it tastes pretty good that's sad miller highlight life is good man i used to drink it i it's not good it's not good okay Hey, James Ottawa. It's the Pogne of beers, bro. It's the shit.

Speaker: I just got a drink called Sugar Biscuits. Whoa, I dated her in high school. It's the best poor man beer. You must have been held back a while.

Speaker: We both dated her in high school. Yeah, well, you know. That was my nickname in high school. Sugar biscuits? We both dated Brittany in high school. Oh my god, damn.

Speaker: Yeah, actually got a nice biscuit in the high school. I paid $60 for 14 grams.

Speaker: phil What'd you do? missed something. What'd you do, James? Oh, I bought... You don't speak, Spam. 14 grams of wheat for $60.

Speaker: That was probably some swag.

Speaker: I'm going to assume that's a good deal. It's 31%. 31% to you. You got the terpenes and lemonines and shit like that. I'm just going to show this. don't know what we're talking about.

Speaker: We missed Wednesday. Sorry, guys. yeah Where is Michael? I thought he was coming around on Saturdays. Or was he here earlier? some family stuff come up so we couldn't make it. there we'll We'll be back.

Speaker: that goes in um I'm not sure what he's doing. Shady's back. Tell some friends. We are shady. That actually scares me that i I think this is halfway decent now.

Speaker: What? Moose Miller High Life. no is not bad No one's judging. it it Shut up, Shaman. You don't even know what you're saying.

Speaker: I don't know exactly what the fuck I'm talking about. It's not that good, Shaman. It's not. It's the champagne of beers, bro. I'm telling you, man. I've actually tasted a lot fucking worse, man.

Speaker: It's like the water beer. If you want to know the backstory for that. I've tasted a lot worse. The back of that. The yeah back story of that.

Speaker: You see Scott's comment. That's Canadian weed. I mean, we've seen what those people pass off as bacon. you guys think ham is Bacon. a bad way at this spot apples yo like seular place in lighttime for you You guys also think Thanksgiving is in October, so what the Well, that's when we harvest our crops. That's why we celebrate it. We celebrate the farmer's crops. Yeah.

Speaker: Damn, you ruined my You guys give out candy when you harvest your crops, too? but young get it first You didn't have to do it in the mic. We would have heard that. It was pretty impressive though, wasn't it? we otherwise like can you invent we Made my shake a little bit. yeah Made mine shake too. We all felt it in our testicles. Brittany grew set just so they could shake.

Speaker: to what less Just then they dropped. Did you say you gave it a five? I'll give it it's like i'll take ah I'll take a five on the first beer. Actually, it's second beer. Because I didn't have room in my fridge for all of them. So I had to drink one real quick. My pulse is a lot of I laughing for no reason.

Speaker: to go back to go back to the Scottos come or go back to the dry counties and in dry states in Kentucky and YouTube blocked his comment, but he sent it to me and he said, if your pussy is dry, so is your county.

Speaker: Kentucky. Well, I know that is wisdom one specific spot in Kentucky that is particularly dry. Is it the G spot?

Speaker: Well, with that being said, my man did me right again. out to my... Shout out, boppy. Shout out, boppy. Hola, boppy, scato. Scato.

Speaker: He makes you look so good, Glick. Yeah, he's always like trying to make him look good. You want that action? He makes us look like shit. 90% of what he's done about me looks terrible. I hate him. I don't want that. I still want that.

Speaker: Scotter said he was talking about KY like the jelly fool, not Kentucky the state. Dumbass. Shut up. I made it funny. You made it funny. Maryland.

Speaker: There's a whole stream posing hoping that Scott was going to take a screenshot and make a No, I don't. i' It doesn't matter what I do. You have to be American where at least my bacon's not ham. Hey, babe, I'm empty. Give me another beer.

Speaker: Oh, shit. She ain't here. Fuck. I love ham, but don't no should jack know gooderers he just give me a new beer. More Scott O'Baggie. I wish I had a woman to get me a beer.

Speaker: Oh, more me too. Seriously, Skato makes you look so good.

Speaker: and like You don't even look like that. I like that one. That one's actually pretty cool. do look like that. No, you don't.

Speaker: No, that one actually might be my favorite one. No, I hate it. he He just wants... he He uses this later on. Sorry, Scotto. He just loves me. He just loves me. Just fucking deal with it. Stop being haters and just Scotto and I be in love with each other.

Speaker: when he's looking at his cartoon yeah that's i don't iy love love it For sure. I'm not going to get in the way of true love. That's fine. Just let Scotto and I be in love with each other and stop it. okay but yeah I Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. got ah What the fuck are you talking about, Scotto? I dethroted a fucking beer bottle. Fuck you, dude.

Speaker: I can't help that. good fa no My dethrone took it up the pooper. was going to say, the last one was Glick. He booped it. He can tell that Skato is underneath him.

Speaker: I don't know what it knows. Glick was doing cowgirl on Skato right there. If you're saying that I can't help that Glick, whatever, I can't even finish the sentence, then you're wrong, girl.

Speaker: Oh, send me something on Snapchat. right Send me on Snapchat too, Sarge. He's going to say something on South Carolina. Yeah, I do. yeah i do I remember.

Speaker: You're good, you're good at Scotto. I don't need that one. in your blue and these what ye um there's we here Is there a story here, Sarge? You were on screen, motherfucker.

Speaker: just Yeah, I don't remember anything, so... He doesn't... He's not out there. doesn't, doesn't. Face, Brittany. I did want to be too mean.

Speaker: When have you ever held back? Come on now. When I... had constipation that's not your that's not your choice it's your body's choice at that point uh scotto feel free to come up on the panel and uh please share modog and his blue indies yeah if i was on my desktop i could show you the picture he's talking about but i don't have it on my laptop scotto you can just make that picture i mean typically i only get scotto because of scotto typically with sarge

Speaker: It's when we're together we're eating purple crayons. No, I knew you Oh, I did that.

Speaker: no i mean you're far i' say mean crown purple unies no we're not eating crayle gri women been those smelly markers oh who i did that Is that why we're so

Speaker: Yeah. yeah in markers that have the fruit for you Generational inbreeding is not why you're fucked up. It's the sniffing scented markers. of like yeah in That you participate in the inbreeding, but some of your it some of your family members may have.

Speaker: Roll Tide, Brittany. Roll Tide. Just because some of my family is from Alabama doesn't mean that they're in bread. Yes, it does. Did they come from Alabama with a mangeling in? No, my grandfather. The cum was on their back, James.

Speaker: Okay, actually this might not I come from Alabama with a mangeling My grandfather was a preacher at the age 11 coming from Alabama. You're the son of a preacher man. I'm granddaughter a preacher man.

Speaker: Granddaughter of a preacher man. The only one they could ever be. This is what happens. Yeah, bre why don't you tell us some of your truth. My grandfather wasn't a preacher. He was a captain for the Air Force. Oh, shit. Mine was an Air Force.

Speaker: We were Pentecostal. I'm not sure what a captain's position is in the Air Force. I'm not sure what a captain's position is. You guys don't have a military in Canada. Shut up.

Speaker: We do. We got the Royal Canadian Air Force. Did you have horses on the airplane? The Royal Canadian Air Force. That's what it was called. For real. Did you have horses, like, on...

Speaker: Mounties were the police that were... they It wasn't actually horses. They were riding mooses.

Speaker: yes moosees luci this mesiss mee meen meus A flock of moose is a moose. yeah bob Behind the moose, there are a bunch of beavers too.

Speaker: That's my spirit animal. then yeah That's my spirit animal. Watch out. the The air bombers were the moosies. What if a moose just like broke out and had wings? A moose is a buffed up deer. pegasus moose? All i gotta to say as far as... more yeah both Do what? correct That's a cute mountaineer. The moose has the antlers like this.

Speaker: Yeah, they're kind of like elves as well. Oh, caribou. You guys know what a caribou is? Caribou, yeah. It's pretty much a bigger version Reindeer.

Speaker: What about like... Reindeer. A caribou kind of look the same. Have you guys seen the Christmas movie, the Polar Express? What if a moose pooped a moose? What, Tom Hanks? Fuck Tom Hanks, yo. It's a cartoon. Who gives a fuck?

Speaker: That's actually a game. Fuck Tom Hanks. Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa. What's with the Tom hay and tom Hanks hate? Just because you want to fuck him. Yo, yo, but but to be honest, my favorite Christmas movie was Lethal Weapon. Lethal Weapon. No, Die Hard.

Speaker: First and foremost, james Lethal Weapon is a Christmas movie. First and foremost, James, thank you for acknowledging that Lethal Weapon is a Christmas movie. I believe it is. here's you brother i agree, but I wouldn't say that it's the best.

Speaker: But I'm on Team Brittany with Die Hard being the best Christmas movie of all time. Die Hard 2 is... Die Hard 2? I meant the first one was a Christmas movie. However, Lethal Weapon... Not a lot of people will agree with me when I say Lethal Weapon is a Christmas movie.

Speaker: But it is a Christmas movie. and then I was with what? Bruce Willis. I feel like... love I feel like The Grinch is a Christmas movie, too.

Speaker: No, it's not. yeah it so it's if If you like The Grinch... The Grinch got screwed over. You were supposed to end up in a Horton Hears-a-Who?

Speaker: Did you say nope? What did you say nope about Jersey? Horton Hears-a-Who? The Grinch was supposed to land in the Horton's Hears-a-Who. I did not have... It was Tim He was told to be Canadian.

Speaker: Shaman coming in here with his slick, slick shit. ah No, I don't know what she said nope about because I refuse to acknowledge you saying nope. She's talking about the movie. A movie a horror movie. I was about to do it.

Speaker: Scotto, check your Snapchat, Scotto. Hey, do you drink Simply Canadian? It's that like flavored water.

Speaker: He's dying. my My Canadian buddy, he'll send me pictures of just the bottle. Simply Canadian all the time. Fucking Canadians. Fucking Canadians. I don't know what you were talking about, but I agree with you. Fucking Canadians. Fuck the Americans.

Speaker: I didn't say fuck the Canadians. I just said the fuck the Canadians. Hold on. Hold on. He's not wrong.

Speaker: First and foremost... James, Ottawa, Tuanawa. Let him cook. Let him cook. oh Fuck you guys and your damn terrorists. Your entire country feared cliffhanger. I had to say a peace treaty that I would not invade your country. your maple leaves For a Canadian, they're not very nice.

Speaker: Yeah, yeah. He's like, fuck you. fuck what Fuck you guys with your freedom of guns. Oh, humbug. Yeah, eh? Oh, humbug. yeah James, yeah you're you're not very Canadian. You sound a little cunt-tan-adian right oh He's a canuck.

Speaker: A cunt-tanuck.

Speaker: I'm just kidding, James. You're my you're my guy, dude. You're cool. Yeah, he'll slather with maple syrup. Don't you worry, James. yo I just hate you guys because you always kick our ass in hockey.

Speaker: Yeah. yeah We took your sport and mean we made it our sport. and we made so what The last Canadian team won the Stanley Cup in 1994. Maple Leafs beat the Caps recently. well while Most of the hockey players are Canadian people. we're talking about It's not even sports ball, it's sports puck. How does it make you feel? I love hockey. Fuck you, Jersey.

Speaker: ah no fuck you fuck you jersey i'm ah I'm a Flyers fan. Moe dog, moe dog, clean up my damn dog. Hey, hey James.

Speaker: Better check yourself where I wreck yourself, motherfucker. Hey James. I'll give you a six pack of beer and a grilled cheese sandwich. Oh, okay. Hey James, I have a very serious tomato sauce. I would love some grilled cheese and tomato soup right now. Oh yeah. Oh yeah. thought I'd be eating a grilled cheese right now. Tomato and basil soup. You gotta have a little bit of basil in the tomato soup. Tomato, tomato. There you go. now I have mac and cheese with pork on it. I just saw that, MoDog. I'm going to make grilled cheese with mac and cheese and pulled pork. just saw what?

Speaker: You just saw what, James? What'd you say right now? Hey, James, can i ask you a question? She's talking about when your dad told you to go clean up the dog shit that night. Yeah, clean up the dog poop, James. oh Oh, MoDog, Jersey agreed with me. MoDog has to clean up my dog poop.

Speaker: I ain't cleaning up nobody's dog shit. Not before i wallow in it first, anyway. No, probably throw up on top of it beforehand. know you You get a six-pack of beer and a sandwich. You get six-pack of beer sandwich. I can't look at it when I do it. i' It ain't sounding too bad, man.

Speaker: My roommate's dog bullshit at the top of the stairs and like... Oh, nice. Your roommate's Canadian? whatever is Was that the South Carolina roommates? I've seen the spotter I like it. I dig it.

Speaker: He's in the army. She's in army. i have no idea what you're talking about, Blake. He's talking about scotting. Tomato and basil soup. That shit's actually pretty good. That's bomb. Yeah, bro. I was thinking about... language james I went out earlier and got some mac and cheese. Then you add a little promosote or whatever kind of cheese you got later on. From under. and she she its always From under. cheese. four skin and cheese. I'm going to change your guys' lives.

Speaker: I know he's becoming Jewish. he's become Now I believe Sasquatches are real. I'm going to change your lives. don't knock it into i know this is gonna sound like for lives yeah he's quittting beer guys he's quittting drinking beers i know its positive sound terrible but Don't knock it until you try it.

Speaker: This is one of the greatest images. This the ultimate tease. This is what I keep telling you, Jedi. We can't just put it all out there. You have to build them up.

Speaker: You have to tease them. He's the head of our marketing. think she was the only fans. you take You take your bread, whatever bread you like. I don't care what you like. You like white bread. You like Oceano bread. You wear that bread that wears hoods.

Speaker: Yeah, you get your eat you whatever. Cracker ass cracker. okay you take that what is Whatever butter is. Whether it be smoothie, creamy, crunchy. I didn't hear just spit it out already. Listen, this it out or swallow. Come on. Let's get to it. What the fuck is going on here? garlic ran He's edging us.

Speaker: yeah you spread yourrean of butter on the bread And then in the final touch, there's a couple thick slices of tomato. A little tomato and peanut butter sandwich. And don't knock it until you try it. Do not give me your criticism and don't give me your shit. all I don't eat tomatoes, so fuck you.

Speaker: Well, fuck you. Peanut butter and not a fan of tomatoes. i'm not offend i'm forget, but it was nasty What do you mean?

Speaker: yeah I don't mind spaghetti sauce or a salsa, but I can't eat tomatoes free. I'm trying to send you something backstage, likeck but I guess StreamYard won't let it. Eggplant, he was showing his eggplant. He was showing eggplant.

Speaker: Peanut butter tomato sandwich is a game changer. It is a life-altering experience. Fuck that. I'm writing that down. I'm going to try it. I promise you will. I don't want to hear your criticism.

Speaker: I don't want to hear anybody saying, no, don't fucking say shit until you try Calm your fucking tits, bro. What made you try that begin with?

Speaker: It almost sounds like you want to fight, man. Like, I just said i would try it. Jada, I said you'd try it. Yeah, I'm going to try it. Hey, Jersey, be nice to me. well What made you try that originally, Glick?

Speaker: We need an origin story here.

Speaker: I grew up a poor kid, a poor white kid. You got drunk one time, and you're like, this seems like a good thing. No, no, I've been eating them since I was a kid. I've need them since I was a kid. I was not like...

Speaker: Sandwiches are... You guys ever date peanut butter? they the manage This is proof that there's something wrong with you, bro. there's stuff that There's a lot wrong with me, Shaman. Basically, what it all boils down to is I was a poor white kid in the hood.

Speaker: I was born a poor black child. you guys ever date peanut butter? I'm a poor white guy. i really was i really was dirt-ass poor when I was a kid, so you just ate what was there, and sometimes sometimes you just threw shit together. No, you don't.

Speaker: Yes, you do. You don't want peanut butter. You don't do that. It was a kid, shaman. know i put my ear do you remember server oh You guys ever had peanut butter and cheese with? That shit's actually pretty good. That sounds fucking delicious, actually. That makes sense. Peanut butter with some cheese with? You've had me eat the fucking... wishes What was it? what it was That does sound good. Marshmallow fluff.

Speaker: It was marinara and fucking peanut butter. I swear to God, everybody makes this weird shit with peanut butter nutty. Peanut butter and peanut butter so good. Peanut butter with some pickles. Peanut butter and pickle sandwiches. Marshmallow fluff and pussy is pretty good, too.

Speaker: yes Hell yeah. I agree. yeah peanut butter Peanut butter and banana sandwiches is delicious. That's another go-to. Fluffer nutters are the bomb. I'm not sure. Do you guys get maple spread up in the States? Maple spread.

Speaker: Yeah, we got electric fucking running toilets and everything down here, man. That's crazy. What is maple syrup? What? Oh, no, maple spread. It's not like a syrup. Oh. No. It's good when you put it on a peanut butter sandwich. That's when you, like, put it on and then you spread it with a knife, right? Is that maple spread? Oh, its sort like a syrupphon It's like a... It's a... It's like apple butter but maple butter.

Speaker: Do you know what apple butter is? Is there any Canadians inside? No, because Canada's not a real fucking place, dude. We keep telling you that. See if I can get my buddy to come on. Well, what is it? Canada's like the second or third biggest country. You buddy to come on? Canada is going to be the 51st state. I got no maple spread. I got no maple spread. But that shit's good with peanut butter. It's hard to explain. It's like a...

Speaker: That was bad. well I'm not sure. I don't know what you guys have in this. I think someone just had an idea. It's de and evening time to drink some more beers. Fucking cheers.

Speaker: I have one for me. Cheers. Cheers. I'm not sure if you guys can get this in the States, but you say yeah it's actually a good Canadian beer.

Speaker: looks Alexander Keese. oh I mean, I don't know if it's on top tier level with my, you know, fucking champagne of beers here, but, you know. Well, why don't you say that? I got to go back with that, okay?

Speaker: That's high quality right there. you i'm and I'm on Team Modog with the champagne of beers. I mean, he won't say it. do Do you guys get India Pale Ales in the States? Yeah. Unfortunately, yes.

Speaker: But when we drink it, we had to talk like this when we drink it. you come in Oh, Indian with the dot, not the feathers. Gotcha, gotcha. Casino India, and not 7-Eleven India. oh no brother it's not the death I don't know. Jersey wants to see my nuts. sure ger Jersey's a little loopy on some medicine right now. My nuts are carbonated. I think she was talking about the maple spread.

Speaker: Moe dogs lady just PS he knows that James knows that yeah feels jersey yeah for me i like but solid joe i look much longer You like your nuts your what? Oh I like you got your you got your and then your sweet

Speaker: yeah my sweet day sweet carol bump bu I love doing that. like If I get a new job, I try to test out the waters with the employees. What I like doing is going to a concert and then the bad member asks us what song you guys want to hear. I say, fucking play Freebird, motherfucker.

Speaker: That's lame. I say tequila. You would be American so bad. You would be the worst American. You would the worst American. Like, literally, I don't believe that you're a movie. I don't care if it's time or if it's the millionth time. I make that same look every time I see boobies.

Speaker: cool Yeah, it's just a boobie look. Boobies make me happy. Jedi, show your boobies. Shaman wants to see your boobies. Right, Brit? Man, woman, job.

Speaker: yeah We don't discriminate. And we don't kink shame. We don't discriminate. Boobies are boobies. I don't care. i don't care if they're saggy. i don't care if they're hairy or they're not hairy.

Speaker: What the fuck is going on with StreamYard, man? I am picking up my babies. yeah I keep trying to show ah a picture in the background for you to show it, and it won't they won't let me. You have to download it. because he's not bringing It this is downloaded.

Speaker: Oh, yeah, lizard nuts. Yeah, yeah, give me them lizard nuts. It won't let it post, Britt. It keeps coming up to me a warning. Well, I know that we have like a shit ton of stuff, and I've been deleting a few things.

Speaker: No, it's it's it's the picture Scotto was talking about of me and my quote-unquote blue undies. What, did you put it in the background? a three but i was I was trying to, but it oh you won't let me.

Speaker: Yo, what was the picture? I'll bring you Yo, yo, MoDog, MoDog, I got it for you. One second. Scotto, you just keep getting better and better.

Speaker: What was I going to show? Jesus. I'm going to answer.

Speaker: Yo, there's Moe Dog in his blue undies. There's Moe Dog in his blue undies. Nice. Hold on, hold on. nice yeah Bring him up.

Speaker: God damn, did I lose a couple pounds? What the fuck? Damn. You're taller than I thought you were. That's Moe Dog in his blue undies. Nice.

Speaker: Wow. Good looking.

Speaker: Oh, no, we lost my last match. Was that the right picture there, Drew? Was that MoDog? No, that's the one after I lost the weight, man. After you lost the weight. Dude, you're going to kill it at the gay bar when we go hang out. I know, man.

Speaker: yo i like That totally sounded like the dude like Harley Dad. You totally sounded like Harley Dad. Who? That girl. you like oh you you know You know Harley, then? I'll punch you right in your stupid face.

Speaker: They're the same person. They're the same person, bro. No, they're not the same person, but they sell this. No, Harley Dad has a fucking goatee and claims to have a beard and and has sent people to my stream.

Speaker: I got no beef with Harley Dad. I got no beef with Harley Dad at all i just we just all. Right there, that sounded totally like Harley. Harley Dad has literally sent people to my stream to say that he has a better beard than I do. And I'm like, first and foremost, but Harley Dad only has one leg. I have both of mine. So suck it, Harley Dad.

Speaker: Harley Dad's cool. I got no beat with Harley. full screen me. Full screen me. Okay. okay Hold on. I just did, motherfucker. That's the picture Scott is talking about.

Speaker: Gross. Why does Jedi have a big grin on his face? Hello, MoDog.

Speaker: Can you guys see it? I can't tell from the glare. Anyway, that's what he was talking about. can see it. Right there. For scientific purposes.

Speaker: Glick, you're just not used to seeing me with the undies on, man. as that yeah you know You know what? You're right. And now Scott has got me saying fucking undies. If you want to see pictures of me like that, go follow me on TikTok.

Speaker: I'm trying to take it down I don't go Jersey

Speaker: um'm trying to take it down i don't know how there we yeah godam wherever you go i got i got so ticks ah i got divification from the other day i ticks on said jersey o ge viewed youred your profile and i was like all shit those she told Oh No, JC, don't look at that.

Speaker: not that one Not that one. Not that one. Not only did she sub, she subscribed. She liked all videos. She's trying to play cool in chat. She's like, I never subbed. Okay, MoDog This was the shirt that Michael was wearing last night And I was like Yo, that looks like I can't see it Turn your brightness down on your phone You fucking turn the fucking fuck well Full screen yourself too Yeah, full screen yourself Well, if I can get it I gotcha, I'll full screen you, Britton Turn your brightness down I'm just gonna Get your fucking light together, Britton

Speaker: That's been a difficult thing. Brittany. yeah thats flat I hate myself that I loved you. so So what is this? up she' for mission I can't see what it says.

Speaker: it was insane it says I'm here for the hoes. And I said that looks like no dog. Yeah. like yeah like It would if I let it grow out.

Speaker: Brittany. yeah Brittany. I just have one thing to say to you. brit britney i'm gonna i i hate that i hate that i love june oh my god you did not just say that no didn't say that didn't say that i sure as hell said yeah you did poppy yeah you did

Speaker: They don't even know what's going on. oh Don't tell. her and merk I was trying to protect your innocence, Jersey. That's all I was doing. It's ah it's a it's a it's a thing. I'll tell you i'll tell you later, MoDog. Yeah. i'll yeah i'll read i'll see I'll see it on TikTok.

Speaker: No, you'll probably see it in a ah comeback YouTube video later. You've seen it on TikTok. Come on my back. What? Don't threaten me with a good time.

Speaker: who Got that right. I'm here for a bullseye for a transplant. I'm from Amsterdam. Shopping for the win. Clip.

Speaker: Clip. Yes, don't call it on tooth track unless you want to more of Glick than you ever bargained for. Look, you really got me with that one.

Speaker: What?

Speaker: I know. I'm such a terrible person. What the fuck? we'll tell you Who's bargaining? It's quality over quantity, okay? Right? You said the more glit than you ever bargained for. Who's bargaining?

Speaker: up, Shaman. you You're the one in my DMs. I don't know. You're the one that's in everybody's. Well, I'm trying to figure out how I can get a cheaper price. There you go. There's Santa Claus. Whoa, is that you, Modo?

Speaker: Yeah. Sorry, Jersey, but I'd sit on that lap. It's a machine through the snow. And I want more soap. You can sit on his lap. I'm sitting on his face. Okay, have fun. least he won't be able to talk. I guess we'll i bet we most get what we want for Christmas. See, motherfuckers, i can grow a beard, bitches.

Speaker: that's That's what it trimmed. Why don't you do it Make some money with us. Come on. You look so different with your life. Wait, wait. Who's that country singer you look like? Put put put that back up.

Speaker: She said for real, Brittany. So the bottom of the beard there, like see see where the zipper on the the the shirt is? before i Before I trimmed that up, like my beard was down almost to the like where the bottom of the picture is there.

Speaker: Oh, youre yeah. You're Santa. Mine is right now. my ah My fucking, my my granddaughter was like, Poppy, you look like Santa. I'm like, yeah, fuck you. I mean, no yeah, yeah, it's cute.

Speaker: Fuck you, kid. Fuck you. Yeah. All right, take that shit off before Scotto sees it. I didn't even think about that. Fuck. How do you not think about that? Literally, Scotto's in the back of my mind. Because i'm i I haven't been on panels much lately, man. I'm and i' im i'm out. I'm rusty.

Speaker: God damn it. Yeah, you didn't go up last weekend. He's been busy making gifts for all the kids. was Exactly. I've been cracking a whip on this on the fucking elves and shit, man. Oh, that makes me feel so weird because I was an elf in a play one time. Yeah, I know. I remember.

Speaker: o Where the fuck Jedi in fucking Canada go, man? Jedi dipped out, man. Fucking pussy.

Speaker: He's probably having a family time. Oh, it's 11-11. Make a wish. He ain't having family time. He'll never see his fucking family. I don't even think he's married, man. I think it's all muse. think it's a joke. I think it's a farce.

Speaker: I don't. No one's ever seen anybody in his family. I hope i know it's much as much as i give you shit As much as I give you shit, I hope you know that New Year's Eve, when you do your stand-up, I'm your biggest fucking cheerleader.

Speaker: You better have some fucking pom-poms. Yeah, because I don't think many cheerleaders are taller or bigger than them. I can find some pom-poms or we can find some pom-poms. I don't care. When you're on stage, if I have pom-poms in my hand, I'll be... Thanks.

Speaker: but Here comes Britney. Let's fucking go Here comes Britney. She's a ho. oh

Speaker: I'll take it. It'll fill up some time. Two Ts. A-N-Y. Britney. Britney. Just kidding. Scotter said the he sure as hell subbed to your TikTok. I'm going to go.

Speaker: Britney. Britney. I was debating on wearing my pants like with the whole wear the Britney. Just be like, hey, Britney. Britney. be i'm brit ne Get it? Britney. It is so stupid that it's funny.

Speaker: It's stupid, but it's awesome. It is really dumb. I kind of figured that would be a like just automatic for you to do that. Wait, wait, what? When did she leave there last night? I'm sorry, excuse me, what?

Speaker: Kayla left them there last night. Her tits? oh I don't know. What were we talking about? I don't know. She still has her tits, right? Panties, maybe? I don't know. Go check. Go check. Let's see. We're still there. still there earlier Trust me. I had that look on my face.

Speaker: I'm curious, though. I want to know. her pom-poms. I know I'm actually really excited to be able to meet Kayla as well. It sucks that you guys can't kiss you guys can't come to the dinner the night before. I don't know. I might i might i might be able to find a way up there. We'll see. get out there i'll Just get up here. You can sleep on the couch in our room.

Speaker: if Well, Michael's already gave me gave me the, you know, he told me that. I told you about that, right? I think I told you about that two weeks ago. I got the couch, so you couldn't find the floor somewhere. What? Like, I don't know, three weeks ago, four weeks ago, whatever, Michael was like, come on, man. He's like, yeah, you can come stay at my house if you want, blah, blah, blah, right? He goes, I'll tell you what, man. He goes, I'll even do you a solid. You won't have to pay full price. He goes, I'll sell you ticket for $32.00. And then two weeks fucking later on the stream, I see him on, I think Wednesday on their funny ha-has or whatever. And he was like, yeah, come on up, guys. Tickets are only $32. I was like, you motherfucker. I was like, no, it's $20. And you're like, what? He told me $32. I'm going to tell you this right now, Moe Dogg. If you come up here, you're not paying to get it.

Speaker: oh yeah know and that's and that and that's And that's me flexing. I have two free tickets. But you will pay to get out. i would i no i would i would i would I would pay. I would contribute to the cause. You will pay. You know what I mean.

Speaker: Brittany, you say that, but i've you've already fucking given it to like six other fucking people. I've heard you be like, i've got you can be my my my plus one and one and one and one and one and one. I found out three other people haven't been able to. Well, as take care of not nonsensical network.

Speaker: Anybody watching, if you come to Warren, Ohio on New Year's Eve, Michael's going hate this. Michael's going to hate this. michael's go Michael's going to kick my ass for saying this.

Speaker: Yeah, because it's not your fucking show to say You come to Warren, Ohio to the underground lab. Just know that we are losing money. and And you come to the door. And you come to the door. And we in use and you use the secret phrase.

Speaker: Glick. You'll get in. Touch my dick. Glick touched my dick. what what is what What is the door price? we're not nobody's losing Nobody's losing money because nobody's going to actually come to Warren, Ohio and use the phrase, Glick touched my dick. Especially on New Year's Eve. Because when you say, Glick touched my dick,

Speaker: then whoever's at the door has to send somebody else to find me so I can come to the door and I bring you in. Honestly, I'll let them in for free if they actually say that, for sure. I will let them in. for If somebody says, g click to you you have no... This might be your show, but this You have what no control, bitch. Because it says, my COVID behavior, Nonsensical Network presents. I have whatever power. Then I'm not coming.

Speaker: yeah e so that you guys have You guys have used my network and used my name and used my likeness to promote your shit. And I'm not even in it. Get him, Glick. Get him. Get him. You're really taking this seriously right now. Goddamn. You've got roast a guy who's not even going to be there. You asked for it, homie.

Speaker: Are you on the poster? Are you on the poster? I've asked for... No, I'm not on the poster. I'm not on the poster. I'm not even mentioned in anything. And Michael tells me it's a requirement for me to be there for the meet and greet. And I'm not mentioned in... You don't have to do it. We'll still fucking do it. I'm not mentioned in anything.

Speaker: Look how scared he is. He's shaking at me. Scared of what? Why are you getting so defensive? It was just a joke, dude. You're like blowing up over nothing. Four people that I would destroy?

Speaker: Look at him. No dogs. Britt, you didn't answer my question, though. What's up? If I don't buy a ticket ahead of time and I just show up at the door because I don't know if I'm gonna be able to able make it or not, what's that price?

Speaker: Well, you can come in. That's fine. Why are you so defensive that I throw out the fact that you say, ah people come get and people come get me. Are you on the poster? And I bring people in. It don't matter.

Speaker: My network's on the poster. And you know what? I don't want to hear you say. I don't want to hear you complain about that because talk about you. bring up all the people I want. We bring you up no matter what we're saying. Yes, Glick is a part of it. You're just not a part of the comedy thing that's being filmed. because i'm thing is separate. mediums up there So on the reel, I have a question.

Speaker: If you're going to roast somebody, like the people in the audience kind of have to know who the person is, right? Yeah, which is why I've been bringing it up in other fucking podcasts and everything. I'm like, why do we watch our videos and talk about how Glick is? No, no, no. I wasn't i wasn't reading out comments we' when we're going live.

Speaker: No, i wasn I wasn't being negative. on my My question, I had a follow-up to that. Sorry, sorry. And and the follow-up was, how many people are going to actually be there? Do you guys have a handle on it yet that that actually know who Glick is?

Speaker: no so so Yeah, we don't have a lot. So the show itself, the comedy show itself is promoted. i know that's non-glick. I know that part. It's promoted and branded as a comedy show.

Speaker: So none of that will be none of that will be on social media. The roast is after Britt, Michael, Scotty, and... Robert Coleman. We've gotten through that already.

Speaker: Yeah, Robert Coleman. And then we're going to go live. like that's like The network and the roast and going live, none of that's outside part of the comedy show. So to answer your question, MoDog, it's just me Michael, a little bit of snotty because he doesn't really know him No, I don't. The promoted outside of the shows.

Speaker: Outside of our shows. The comedy side is the only thing that's promoted. That's why we are going live and I'm going to read out the comments. Fuck that. I'm going to be in a crowd. Just hand me a mic. Just hand me a wireless mic. That's why we on the show. Y'all be like, just come on up here, dude. Get up here on stage with us, man. The comedy won't be live because Michael believes that real comedians don't put their comedy on social media. That's not at

Speaker: But, you know, as I've told Michael before, those the biggest comedians out there are on social media. it is is There's a process of letting it out at a certain time because we have a the videographer doing it. So that's the reason.

Speaker: So if I come, am I allowed to bring my camera? Yes. Cameras. Will I give you access to the network? and I don't think professional equipment is allowed. we'll let that We'll allow that for you, man.

Speaker: Well, no, I was asking because I know you guys hired another photographer and shit. you know I don't want to be trumping. Videographer. It's easier than a clubs normally won't let you that shit load off. Well, and I know a lot of ah stand-up comics, like, they'll take phones.

Speaker: but they're famous. We're not. so Well, a lot of famous... now if you If the comedians bring the photography, that's fine. Or the videographers, then that's fine. But like if an audience member tried to come in with some fucking professional-looking shit, they're like, nah, we ain't doing that. Yeah, but we're not like big like that, so it's like, whatever. And honestly, that's why I was asking.

Speaker: You're lot of fun, you shit. Because I wouldn't want to go up there with my shit and then be like, nah, you can't come in with that. And then have to leave it out in the car. I'd be like, nah, fuck that. that's As long as you don't record it and post it because of... Well, I wouldn't i wouldn't post it anywhere. If anything else... like If anything, your cameras just don't record it. Okay. My bad, Brent. He put a comment that he was backstage and we can't leave. The man is a busy man. I was trying to let Mo Dog finish his sentence and then I was going to bring him up. He was going to finish his sentence. What I was going to say was if I did come in, if I came up there and I brought my camera and just took pics and shit while I was in there, while it was going on. I wouldn't post anything. I wouldn't post anything. I would take them to them if Glick wanted to give me a space on the network or some shit to upload them. And then I'd be like, here, you guys can have them. Do with them what you want. Yeah, definitely, my dog. As far showing them on here, I ain't talking about making money off of them and shit. Pay a motherfucker down. Either way, don't care. Because this is my mindset and this is where I live.

Speaker: I will be taking video and and I will be dropping a little 15 second 30 second clips On our network. Your phone's getting taken away. Of their stand-up. Not for full stand-up. What's Johnny? You're getting put in the corner Yeah, what up?

Speaker: just just what's up johnny here you getting put in the corner you made it up grab a hair what up Fidel Bongs is a busy man. You know what, Fidel? I can't be. You know, I can't just leave him by the back door. Did you see his new hat? oh this guy This guy is fucking running a country and got time to come and stop of a shit too yeah Captain Fidel Bongs are right here. I'm getting another one. I'll be back. Believe me my family saw me in the uniform tonight and they found me something was...

Speaker: Did you say you're going to drop? yeah Why is it so dark, Johnny? Yeah, why is it so dark? It's Cuba. They're in a blackout. good It's dark because it's past Shaman's bedtime.

Speaker: Oh, believe me. My my family took a look at this get-up tonight and called me some wayward. Shaman's time is always dark, I thought. Why? It's because... can i get a badlick kind cup What time do you got to get up tomorrow?

Speaker: I'm bareback. 4. I guess you can go to bed if you really want to. Yeah. What the fuck you doing, gentlemen? Huh?

Speaker: Salmon's my dao. That's my dao. That's my brother ro mother of a different color.

Speaker: Yeah, because I'm Asian. Yeah, he's yellow. He sounds a Yellow as fuck. They call me Yas.

Speaker: Where are the dogs tonight? gee Did you euthanize your chihuahua that identifies it as a pit bull? Allegedly. No, she's she's been he's been ah going through and just chewing up all her fucking toys lately. Yeah, she's been quiet today. Not much to squeak. She's looking for her bone right now.

Speaker: She's been quiet today. What do you think we know where her bone is? Get the peanut butter out. She can smell the peanut butter. Okay. yeah Brittany, you came sashaying through. you were like, yeah yeah and that light came on like you were like a real supermodel. Yeah, I know. Motion censored.

Speaker: I was just curious. I had to look. Looks like Twaddle and probably Jedi went over to another stream and that's going on. Oh, shame on them. That's some foul shit right there. Oh, they're on Harley Dad. Harley Dad Live. Marissa.

Speaker: Marissa Sparkle. He thinks that he was mean to them and he needs to say sorry. Wait, hold on second. Harley Dad who was me mean to who?

Speaker: No, Sparkle. Who the fuck is Sparkle? yeah it's It's another girl that sounds like Saturday podcast. Sounds like a transvestite.

Speaker: like competition bro We are becoming friends with them, so don't say anything. I don't know who they are. You're not being mean. I'm just saying it sounds like a fucking drag queen.

Speaker: Marissa Sparkles. That's just her YouTube name. i mean It kind of does. does.

Speaker: i wait but Once he said it, I was like, oh shit. Yeah, now that he said it a second time, I'm like, oh fuck. Right? think You're right, but just don't say it out loud.

Speaker: Oh, my bad. My apologies. Not until later. i apologize i My apologies to the transvestite person. My apologies. but I apologize. and guys the best I

Speaker: punch Jedi right in his fucking Canadian con. I don't know if Jedi's over there or not. I just saw the thing that popped up that said she was live. so ah He's getting convicted. oh maybe oh You better find out. I'm going to Google this shit.

Speaker: Yeah! I'm going to suspend him from the show. If he's in there, I swear to God. Johnny Hurch, he was live, he was like, fucking, I'm dipping, too. He was like, Sparkles is on? That's my favorite trains.

Speaker: That's where Ottawa went. Kayla said, i'm not kala and I'm not trying to be friends with that transvestite, so I don't have to apologize. Thanks, Daddy. and I probably shouldn't even say anything. I didn't mean anything negative by it. I just saw the pop-up that came up that said she was live. She's cool. I met her last night. I'm literally just playing and and if and if she hears this and she gets that butt hurt, well, you're not meant to be here.

Speaker: Just jokes. It's what we do. It's what we do. No. Seriously. no oh there's I want to say stuff about last night. We'll see. What happened last night? Where were you at last night? We have Shama Lama Ding Dong here. Who did you get in the fight? I was on the lazy... I didn't get in the fight with anybody. It was just annoying. Just like... Oh, shit!

Speaker: Yeah! Jersey in the house. Dropping them facts, Kayla! Hey, Jersey knows where the room can be. I need them sound effects. So where were you at? You were on Jedi and Shaman show?

Speaker: Yeah, I was on Lazy and Shaman show, but then we went over to Casey whatever majiggy show. Jones. Yeah, Casey Jones. Actual Casey Jones? Casey's a good guy, man.

Speaker: cases Yeah, he's cool. He's cool people. That was my favorite Ninja Turtle, Casey Jones. Look at you. You're just getting all in with everybody, Britt. Look at you. Yeah, look at me go. Why are you not bringing them here, Britt?

Speaker: um I'm trying to. Lazy is dragging her through, huh? I'm sorry. I'm not a... I say I'm a slur, but I'm not... I mean, his name is Casey Jones. I think he's a good dude. I need to get a boob job, I guess. I don't know. You can have some of mine if you'd like. I don't know if Casey Jones needs a boob job. Can i donate boobs to you, Brick?

Speaker: I've looked it up and you literally cannot do that. You have to be you have to be twins. Like, legit twins. We can pass as twins. But they'll throw a fucking liver in your body. Fuck. I can give you my kidney, but I can't give you... Here's a kidney, right? You gotta get like one tick from a black chick, one tick from fucking Guatemalan and shit. Half and half. It'll be like a Neapolitan of tits. I just got to say, that's some bullshit. I get your vagina from China.

Speaker: No, I don't want to side this. It's going to slanted. Yeah. It's true. It's facts. hate to bring it to Largest or largest organ in my body.

Speaker: ever thats yeah yeah we all We all knew where you were going and we were all like bullshit. I'm sorry. I can't lie to you people. I don't i don't lie. Bullshit.

Speaker: Oh, kid, we got the lights back on. Good good to see back butel bombs what you. to Go check out that tranny. Goddamn, stop saying that. You're going to start a whole bunch of internet drama and shit, man.

Speaker: They're jokes. They're jokes. and can you handle it well I know. People can't take jokes. but So the difference is... They can take back shots, though. but Okay, when Glenn says a joke, it it comes off differently. You know what I mean? It's just like... Big meathead is saying that. No, if you're a sensitive twat waffle, it comes off differently.

Speaker: Ooh, twat waffle. i haven't heard that in fucking forever. You know, if you said that in the English accent, it'd be so less offensive. Merry Christmas. of seeds.

Speaker: merry christmas tea hands a seat love you bro and play see of thieves people literally can't take jokerks i know a a oh Hey, puppy. Hanukkah, everybody. Happy Hanukkah. Sanuka Kuka.

Speaker: community man i love I love the hell. Fuck, is today Saturday? I forgot to Shabbat Shalom when I came home. yeah um Damn it. We're going to hell. I think we heard you Shabbat your Shalom before. i shaat sha yeah all want I did last night before bed.

Speaker: Then I fell asleep and then I woke up and I cleaned it up. and nice screw up like well I am. then And then went to bed. Happy Kwanzaa. As shaman speaks and I look at pictures. I said happy Kwanzaa earlier. I'm Shabbat and my Shalom.

Speaker: Happy Kwanzaa. Happy Kwanzaa. Happy Kwanzaa. Merry Christmas. mahannna kwansica Happy Hanukkah. That was good. That was good, Britt.

Speaker: I can't. but That wasn't me. Can you spit again, Britt? but I bet you... Chris Mahana Kwanaka. Chris Mahana Kwanaka. soma mc ones because What she said. give props. Cheers to you.

Speaker: yeah give crosss seriously Marissa Sparkles, if you hear me talking shit, I'm just playing with you. I have no idea who you are. I'm just playing with She's a lovely lady. she is She's really nice. Yeah, she's pretty cool. she is She's real nice. I like going over there.

Speaker: Yeah, I'm just playing with you. Feel free to come over here. We'll co-stream together. We'll play with you, too. Well, yeah, so you say I don't do what you anything for the fucking stream. I i was helping you out with the Flick's House of Music and everything else.

Speaker: I started to say, don't go into her stream and then drop the link to this stream. That's just fucking rude. started I hate it when people do that shit. Well, I didn't even bring it up. Somebody else did. and then i was like No, I'm talking about when you see like somebody randomly join. i'm not I'm not talking about tonight or Marissa. I'm just talking about general. like When you see somebody join the fucking chat, and they're there like two fucking seconds, and they're like, hey, come over and check my shit out, and they drop their link to their foot. That's just fucking rude when you're on like another live is going on. To me, I think it is anyway.

Speaker: It is a low blow for sure. Brittany, what did you ask Santa for? What hell are you doing, Charlie? Boobies. Oh, sorry. I tried to help. How do you know, MoDog?

Speaker: But apparently, ah we can't. Dang, that's how you can't donate boobies to people on unless. I didn't necessarily mean like, you know, an enhancement. I just meant, you know, you that could have been taken as just another set of boobs to play with. Either way. way.

Speaker: Keep them in a box, you know. Take them out, play with them when you want. Whatever. I was just trying to help you out. I swear to God, if you show up to New Year's Eve thing, like one of those baby things. If you show up to New Year's Eve, you better bring purple crowns. She's talking to you, dude, not me.

Speaker: Oh, if I show up, I'm not showing She said you better not show up with one of fake boobies things on. she's an artist she See, I listen. I listen, Britt. I listen. Brittany's already molested my boobies. She was like, wow, you have amazing kids. actually did. i did. yeah I was like, I know you're jealous. Well, I punched them more so than anything. She pressed them and then she punched them. Give them your purple marbles.

Speaker: I did. time, didn't I? Actually, she did. I did. gave her a little purple nerf. She got me. I wasn't paying attention. She got me. I was like... It's going to happen again. As much as we fuck each other, the first time we seen each other in person, we were literally like brother and sister. Little sister. Whatever.

Speaker: there was lot that I thought you going to say you guys were like quiet and awkward around each other. There was no quiet or awkwardness about us. mean just What you get on here is what we had. I think there was one or two times I just kind of mooshed her in the face.

Speaker: I gave him a purple nipple and then I was like... No nit backs. No nit backs. I was like, there's nothing. Nothing. me And then he just continued to watch foosball for the rest of the day. Foosball. We had we headed in the building. How you doing? Yeah.

Speaker: Shaman, what the fuck are you doing to that dog, man? shaman what the fuck are you doing to that dog man I know. Poor thing. He likes it. He likes it.

Speaker: What did I ask Santa for? What did I ask Santa for? was funny right as I'm going to bed. This is what I'm getting. It's been good all night. I want Heelys. You want Heelys?

Speaker: Is that still a thing? Yes, I found out that they're still thing. I've... Roller skate. So I have those. So maybe not. I bought those for my granddaughter like five years ago. Five? Five.

Speaker: Yeah, they're like 15 years ago. Shit. now I'm saying as of five years ago, they were still a thing. That's why was surprised they're still a thing. You know what? fuck both of you guys, man. Yeah, no, seriously. i remember i know I remember one of my friends in high school had them. And that that had to have been...

Speaker: yeah You know what? let's Wait a minute. It's funny you say that. It's funny you say that because when I was in high school, they there there was there was a kid that used to have them. They used to fucking scoot down the fucking hallways and shit.

Speaker: And now I'm going back to like 1980 fucking too. I swear to God. yeah i don't i don't I don't know that they were called Heelys at that time. but i had I'm going back to the late you know late ninety s You know, those they before Healy's came out, they had these shoes where they had like these two little wheels in the back and two little wheels in the front where you pop the button. They're called roller skates.

Speaker: No. And I think that's i think that's that might have been what he had. But, no. i We were playing monkey in the middle and my neighbor hit one of the wheels buttons and they out. little black kid down the street.

Speaker: How'd you know?

Speaker: yeah i fellow That was me. yes That was me. okay and I didn't appreciate it.

Speaker: Racism. Hey, you said it. I didn't say shit. Shaman said it. I don't know. He said it. I didn't hear Shaman say anything. I didn't hear him say anything.

Speaker: i know it looks like i did not hear shaman say anything i didn't hear him i didn't hear him' saying that She said, I'm pretty sure what I heard was that fucking black kid from down the street. Sometimes.

Speaker: What the fuck? Two out of three Palmarians agree. i' here Calm your Palmer pit bull down.

Speaker: Palmer bull. You're palmer bull. You're reaching. Reaching. I am reaching. was reaching. You're right. I was reaching. Can I get to reach around? We're reaching. Yes, the fuck you can. Do you guys want to run to yourself?

Speaker: What? Rim job. What? Whoa. Hey. Right around the brown rim. Oh, my gosh. What am I witnessing?

Speaker: I was hungry for breakfast. The starfish is chocolate. The starfish is chocolate. Chocolate starfish. Hot dog water. Hot dog flavor

Speaker: water. What up, MK? The only thing lazy is smoking is Paul.

Speaker: MK, how you been, man? Long time no see. but Okay. Yeah, long time to see, buddy.

Speaker: Okay. If I could ask Santa for anything and it's like anything. Titties. Oh. Epimonibus. Oh, I thought. All right. I'm going to smoke the rest of this bowl then I'll go to bed. Oh, weed for a year.

Speaker: Weed for a year. You know, I don't smoke weed, but if you you're reverse it, Free beer for a year? get what you're saying.

Speaker: freeweed Free weed, free beer? Hell yeah, that was a good wish. already had weed for a year. Have you all seen the box? did yeah Yes, we've seen the box. That's a month. Stop playing.

Speaker: I've seen it on these other boxes and I didn't even ask to see how was it. was It was not good. ah It was a while.

Speaker: fucking full of marijuana. Oh yeah, you did show us your fucking smoke arsenal of marijuana. The thing is, if I smoke too much nowadays, it makes me turn right out of my mind.

Speaker: Just fucking smoke it, bro. That happens in communism, man. i I got manic borderline schizophrenia. So whenever I get to towards the paranoid spot, I tend to fall off for a little bit. A communist dictator. But now apparently he's the captain of a ship.

Speaker: Well, not yet. out your hat I always thought that was a costume. I didn't realize that was your other personality. What happens in international water it stays in international water. It's far better than what I've been called wearing this. so i mean I appreciate that.

Speaker: You can't be arrested in international waters. You just get held up in the brig. seven g m k getting alone Just blow you the fuck up. I like though. I like the sand of that.

Speaker: them sexy Navy boys can put me in their brig anytime. Oh, wait, what? Nah. Man, everything's a Nazi nowadays. You don't agree with something. You're fucking Nazi.

Speaker: No, what kills is when they call people fascists and shit, they're like, they have no idea what it even fucking means. I'm like, they're so fucking stupid. You can't say that, you fascists. It's all brainwashing, man.

Speaker: The people calling people fascists are usually the biggest fascists. Yeah, exactly. Exactly. my My mom was sitting at night and she looked me up and down. She's like, you really look like a Nazi, right? like scott I didn't have that thought until you brought it up and made it. Thank you. now Now I think that.

Speaker: Yes, Percy and Navy should never be used in a same sentence. I'd rather have a Marine. Yes, sexy I mean, there is there is a little bit of, of you know, They have booties. Now I have a fucking complex.

Speaker: For their boys. And now I have a fucking complex. a brand Why are you in the dark? I only do half it. I thought you were going for the kind of time frame vibe, you know. thought that was the vibe you were going for. I... MoDog, confirm and or deny.

Speaker: the the The Marines are... Don't even say it. Don't even fucking say it. don't Don't even fucking say it. i already already know. and this motherfucker share brain saw, I think, man.

Speaker: I already know what he's going to say. The Marines, they're a department of the Navy, right? Yeah, the fucking men's department, motherfucker. e Is that what you were going to say?

Speaker: and you guys teach all the little boys how to be men? Is that what you were going to say? You called me out so quick. I could i guy i could feel it coming across the interwebs, man. brother I'm to put you guys next to each other.

Speaker: here we do i i knew were that I knew where the fuck he was going with it, man. i don't I don't know that I've ever seen him turn red before, man. look how red that motherfucker got. You haven't?

Speaker: I'm crying. You look like you look like a period. As soon as he said, hey, MoDog, I was like, I know that word. No, fuck, shut up, man. I'm surprised we're not seeing MoDog peek up behind him right now. like I swear to God, we share brain cell. I was like, yep.

Speaker: other i You know what? And I apologize. I know I'm just a piece of shit. Brittany's like, yeah, you're both fucking retarded. Oh, you heard that? My bad. Yeah. Inside voice, Brittany. Inside voice. Okay, Grandpa. hear yeah i heard pass vo like I'm to go in stealth like a ninja. Nah, nah. I got my flanks covered, motherfucker. I'll cover your flank any day, baby boy. Oh, Scotto, what? Shit.

Speaker: who I may not have been a part of the Marines, but I've had Marine training. oh I bet you have. had marine That's what I heard. That's what I heard.

Speaker: She's had two, three, four Marines in her. sometimes think For what it's worth, Jersey jersey was thinking about going the Marine Corps when she was a young'un too. yeah I could just because of health issues. well I almost said something I shouldn't. I can go into the Marine Corps, so I let the Marine Corps go into me. Yes! Land ho, motherfuckers, land ho. Land slore.

Speaker: Land slore. landlor No, then I tried to go into the army. couldn't, but I still have a chance to go into the National Guard.

Speaker: Those who do, those who do, do, those who can't wish they did. It's not. how I said those who can't. eat No, it's because of my health.

Speaker: Like, I literally have. well fred but bri no one with there eight and you might my plan was lifelong army. i wanted to go into the army and i knew what i could do And then I got, oh, well, you can't do this job. Who the fuck is fapping in the background, man? What the fuck? what i was What are you doing, Shaman? What the fuck, man?

Speaker: I've been fapping all night. I'm spanking her while she's chewing her bones. She likes me. That's he's single. It straight up sounds like you're over there fapping like a motherfucker, man.

Speaker: its um something i been chap I actually get to see Shaman on video in video chat. Sorry. I actually know some information that you guys don't know. Uh Well, if you're not going to tell us, why even fucking say that? I actually got to see Shaman.

Speaker: Britney, don't feel so special. I saw Shaman for a split second. Is that all it took? Is that all it took? Yeah, I can die now. was like, ugh.

Speaker: So, was was it a good split second? brit it was yeah It was a split second. there was like She was like, i mean that was second get best split second also gave us time to cuddle, so.

Speaker: She said, I mean, I i cried. I died. Oh, you died. That's why he was able to cuddle with me. That is emotional. Shaman, I hope you're happy. That split second made her a single mom with a bad credit score.

Speaker: And it's all your fault. No. will not be buying any Happy Father's Day cards in Kroger's. Shaman was like, take that white girl.

Speaker: No. okay I got you like yeah look Look at Brin. She's all stretched out. She's got her knees. Right? She's like, hey. Hey. She's like, what's up? What's up?

Speaker: Show me those lizard balls. Show me those lizard balls. What are those lizard balls, dude? I'm waiting for a black guy to come impregnate me and fuck up my credit score. Yeah.

Speaker: Give me some fucking. Fuck Father's Day, man. You want a master child? Hold on second. You know, Mother's Day also Father's Day. She was like, you want to be a single mom?

Speaker: I got you. i got you. See, it's opposite for me, though. it's Because I've always had my dad, not my mom. So, like, Mother's Day is Father's Day for me. I'm like, Happy Mommy Daddy's Day, which sounds so... I want to punch every woman in the face that's like, it's Father's Day, but I do both worlds. Fuck you, bitch. We don't get shit. We get one fucking day, and even that's minuscule. Like, can't even let us have that, man. I stand up for the men that have been there. Like, fuck you, man. Shout out be dads. And shout out to my ex-wife's

Speaker: She hit a little bumpy road. but shots You had your bumpy road, too. so I had my bumpy road, too. But I've always been there for my kids. I've always put my kids first, first and foremost.

Speaker: She hit a little rough patch, but shout out to her because she knew that she was in a bad spot and she allowed me to step in and stuff like that.

Speaker: But man, that dad shit pisses me off. I understand like women go through the nine months sometimes. Yeah, but... i mean shit like but i Hey, shut up for a second. I know this is your show.

Speaker: I'm trying to give men props because men get a lot of shit. Men get a lot of shit. And they don't... Like if they go to court with some of these things, like they're just looked over and the women usually have the upper hand even when they're the worst parent and it's fucked up so what you do yeah as far as mother's day and father's day goes like and it pisses me off when when guys say the same thing yeah yeah i play both rules no let moms have their day and let dads have our fucking day like like

Speaker: Mrs. Doubtfire is a really good Also, you fucking losers that were like, I'm a fur mom, I'm a fur dad. Punch him in your fucking stupid face, too. Punch him in your cunt.

Speaker: I'm a fur dad. I have mad respect for the people that can co-parent. no no like i said you know shout out to my ex-wife because when she was in a bad way she recognized it and and allowed me to step up and my kids live with me full time for like two years and i took care of everything i told my ex when i was leaving her i was like one day one day you will realize this is the right decision right It took her seven fucking years. but It took my mom like 19 years for her to get drunk. And she was like, I'm sorry to leave you guys. I just felt like you were better off with your dad.

Speaker: Shut up, go to bed, shaman. you And you're going realize sometime that this is the right decision. that was That was the thing with my my ex-wife and I. We we we came from broken homes. We came from shitty parent situations.

Speaker: and And when my oldest one was born, i said, whatever whatever happens between us, we cannot put her through what we went through. So we always have to, no matter if we hate each other, we have to always put her first.

Speaker: and That's the goal, is just to make it better than what you went through. And when we split up as in the first year or so, like there was ah there was a lot of times where it was like,

Speaker: um Just tough to be in the same fucking vicinity. yeah I could push you in front of a bus and just make my life so much easier. and i know And I'm sure she felt the same way about me.

Speaker: but See, I don't know what would it be better is like if one of your parents left you as a 10-month-year-old going through... Now, truth be told, when I left, my kids were 18 and 16, so they were fucking grown.

Speaker: You know what I mean? I wasn't saying that. No, no, no. I know you weren't. I know you weren't. And it crushed her because she wanted them to hate me so fucking bad. So bad. And they didn't. Like, me and my daughter are like thicker and thieves, have always been. Me and my son, we're not as close, but still...

Speaker: So, like, she was telling that we were telling the kids, you know, and and it was rough, right? Like, I mean, we're sitting there, sitting the kids down, telling them mom and dad's, you know, getting a divorce, you know? And, yeah. And she she immediately went in with the, you know, this is all your dad. This is all him. He's the one. And, and she like I said, she it took her good few years to realize, okay, they're not going to fucking hate him, right?

Speaker: But when we were sitting there telling them, my daughter, who was 16 at the time, even said this is like probably 15 20 minutes after right and she was like dad we we we don't know why you didn't leave mom like five years ago yeah well that was you could just see that her soul leave her fucking body and shit that was the cool thing about about my ex-wife and i is when we were when we hated it when we were we were going through like we never we never we never pivoted the kids against each other yeah I mean like we there were there were there was a couple times where literally he came to my house and the kids were here and we yelled and screamed at each other

Speaker: and we yelled and screamed at each other wow But then we walked back in the house like everything was fine. yeah You know what I mean? Like we didn't want kids to have to feel like they had to choose sides or anything like that. so My dad totally did that with my mom. I'm fortunate in that. and you know yeah know even Even when the kids came to stay with me, it was like I never talked bad about their mom was like you know Things are hard. see and that was the biggest That was the biggest thing that I struggled with because I didn't talk shit about her, but she did talk shit about me for the first few years. right i mean I'll give her credit. She like she doesn't now because they well they knew then. right like They knew like

Speaker: the bullshit she was spewing when she spewed you know but you know i mean no we're cool now i mean she's got like her fiance and shit man i don't like we can hang out you know far i mean the last few years i've gone over to her house for fucking thanksgiving because it's easier on the kids you know i mean You know, I told her, I said, one day, perfect world, one day, and whoever I'm with, you and whoever you're with, go out on like a double date and just have a good night. yeah You know, just like chill. You know, like, i she's a good person. I don't hate her. I just couldn't fucking live with her anymore. You know what i mean? But as a person, she's a good person.

Speaker: You know, she's a good mom. She's a good grandma. you know My mother's family would always, like, have us over because she ran away. But they was they were always, like, accepting.

Speaker: of my dad even though he wasn't part of the family so yeah my ex-wife's family be cordial like that is totally cool yeah She's still trying. I mean, we grew up together, right? Like, we were dating when I was in high school, and she was, like, when we met, I think. 80 years ago?

Speaker: Yeah, 80 years ago when I was 20. Yeah. she I think I was 15. She was, like, 13 and three quarters, whatever. She was about ready to turn 14. And so we had we had spent the first half of our fucking lives, you know? She was still 13, though.

Speaker: Times were different. Well, I had just turned 15, motherfucker, so there wasn't any legal shit going on. And Modal was 18. So you were like 14, 13 like phone to fourteen My point being, we grew up together.

Speaker: Spent half, the the first half of our lives together and shit. And she knows, like, she knew what buttons to push on me and shit, you know? And she would try that shit. And after I was gone, I was like, I was like,

Speaker: You do you, boo. Like, that shit don't affect me anymore. You know? Where are those brothers? First time she got into an argument with her fucking... what Her and her fiancé have been together like 15 years now.

Speaker: And... First time they got into a fucking argument he was all pissed off, I was like... How long were they engaged? Oh, they've been engaged for like fucking 10 years or some shit. He ain't ever going to put a ring on it. Hopefully he's not ready to pull the trigger. No, no. They're living in a house that I bought and paid for. I mean, you know, like, he was like, they got together and after like eight months he was like, fuck it, I'm selling my shit just moving in with you. And then Moe Dog lives in squander.

Speaker: Right? You know what, man? God. but Hey, bro. Hey, bro. Hey, look. Hey, man. i feel I feel that 100% because i had i had a house in Charleston.

Speaker: Big, beautiful house. I was getting ready to buy when I first came home. My first apartment was like 600 square foot. I'm just like... Dude, at 39 years old, I started over with fucking nothing, dude. yeah Because i gave I gave her fucking everything, man. I gave her everything. Because that was my kid's home, man. That's where they grew up. i wasn't trying to i wasn't trying to make her life hard. I wasn't trying to make their lives hard, you know? No, I was 37.

Speaker: That's what it is. night And I literally came back to Ohio. And and my garage in my house that I had in Charleston, the house I was getting ready to buy, my garage was bigger than my first apartment when I came back home to Ohio.

Speaker: And it was a three-bedroom apartment. and it was And then when the kids came to stay with me full-time, I was like, I can't do this. Now I got this condo that I've been in for the last three years.

Speaker: And it's like, shit, man. Oh, gosh. oh did i I gave her the fucking house, the fucking the the fucking cottage down on the fucking lake in Kentucky. i mean she she was yeah She was well taken care of. She was well taken care of.

Speaker: Like I said, it is what it is. break news I asked Kayla to move in with me. And now Kayla and I are like, we got to upgrade. hey We can't.

Speaker: When she brings her shit and then I got my shit, it's just like, ooh, we got to upgrade. We got a lot of shit. Yeah, we got a lot shit. What did you say, Britt? You going over to Marissa's? that what you're to say? Yeah, I'm going to hop over there for a second. I'll be right back. I just want to break it for second.

Speaker: Well, I'm going hop off. I got to go to bed. Shaman, dude, it's just trash, brother. Love you, man. Take care, brother. Bye, dude. Peace out, so have a good one. Take care. Brittany's trying to slur her way into other communities and shit.

Speaker: Hey, if it brings more people in, let's go. I can tell you right now it won't, but go do you, boo. But also, ah it's also because I... don't know why like a glutton of punishment. It's going to be like torture. I'll probably be back in one minute. Yeah, yeah, yeah. It's just like New Year's Eve.

Speaker: the The brand that made you get shit on. Yeah, well, you're going to laugh and I'm going to enjoy it. I'm not going laugh. Honestly, you're going to laugh at my stand-up. The roast probably won't be as good. I'm going to be your biggest cheerleader. I swear to God, I promise you, I'm going your biggest cheerleader during your stand-up.

Speaker: Your roast, not so much. Yeah, that's fine. Because I don't really have much. I've been focusing on stand-up. No, want your time to be good. I want your stand-up to be good. I'm telling I'm going to be cheering you on. I'm going to be right up there in the front row.

Speaker: cause Why? Because I'm Glick and I do whatever the fuck I want. And I'll be right up there, and going to be cheering you on. if somebody And if I have pom-poms, or if somebody gives me pom-poms, I will gladly wave them for you.

Speaker: And then you can be my security guard as well. I'll be your security guard. I got you, bro. Preach. I'll be right back. Let me see what they're talking about over there. Have fun.

Speaker: Chinese. Yeah, probably not, but we'll see.

Speaker: All right. everybody just does it that's her fucking calling card now no i did i like you know as far as like you know i i i am very grateful for the relationship that i have with my ex and and and we've we've talked about it and it's no secret i mean she's still uh to this day she's one of my best friends we just we just weren't good together yeah we i so here's the weird thing man like We're not best friends. like Like, we're not best friends. But at the same time, like, I know her, you know, and she knows me. Because like guess said, we fucking grew up together. She was with me the whole time I was in the Corps, you know.

Speaker: And, you know, it's... I'm just glad that it's, you know... it's it's it's calm cool and exactly it's it's it's chill we don't there's no arguments anymore those first three or four years after i left were kind of rough you know she would because she was a woman scorned you know so you know she would she would try her shit and i would you know and after she saw that i wouldn't let it go and and and the kids knew that it was a bullshit you know i i won't say it stopped because she still tries to this day you know like

Speaker: I mean, you know they're in Ohio. I live in Kentucky, right? She lives like five minutes from my fucking daughter and my grandkids, right? Yeah. So they get to see the grandkids ten times more than I do, you know? So my grandkids know her fiancé, her boyfriend.

Speaker: He's, you know, he's their other grandpa. You know what i mean? And he treats them great. He's a good guy. You know, like, I have nothing fucking bad to say. You know what and i mean? So it's all good, but, you know.

Speaker: You know, it's just, uh, Yeah, it is what it is. Anyway, and next next subject. it's it's it's It's weird because even like, so when the kids first came to stay with me full time.

Speaker: I'll be right back. I got to piss. I've been holding it for 10 minutes. No, when the kids first came to stay with me full time and they were going, and and and I told her and and and her fiance, like, if you guys need a place to crash, I got you. You know what I mean? And that didn't go over very well with who I was dating at the time.

Speaker: And they're like, you you're just going to let your your ex-wife come and stay at your house? I'm like, yeah, that's my kid's mom, you know, at the end of the day. And and earlier this year, when I lost my job and shit was going sideways, like, her and her fiancé, the guy that she loved me for, they can't... What's up? What's up?

Speaker: What's up?

Speaker: Huh? I am. I'm a little distracted. Why are you so mean to me? um No, they yeah her and her fiance, they they both told me that if if it came down to it and I lost my place, that I would have a place at their house. you know They would make room for me. so you know it's um um I'm grateful for that.

Speaker: and and I'm grateful for the fact that Kayla and i are together and You know, when we first started dating and and I explained the situation, she was she was a little she was a little hesitant.

Speaker: And she was like, oh, God, no, you got ex-wife, baby mama drama bullshit. And then she realized that that's not what it was. And

Speaker: don't know. My ex-wife's pretty cool. She likes Kayla. Okay. As I said earlier, Kayla's the first girlfriend that I've had in the last seven years that she's actually liked. So that must mean something.

Speaker: But, yeah, I don't know.

Speaker: I'm proud of both of us because things could have have been a lot worse. And we could have made things a lot worse, but.

Speaker: Despite all of our bullshit and despite everything we were going through and everything like that, we we always put the kids first. and Now we've reached the point where we are now.

Speaker: so I'm grateful for it. i don't i don know I don't know. Maybe I'm maybe maybe i'm wrong. Maybe I'm completely out of pocket for be like, oh, yeah, you know, my ex-wife is still one of my very good friends, you know? Yeah. I don't know. Nope.

Speaker: If anything, gli but that's that's the core the the more mature route to take about things, you know? yeah Yeah. You're living in here in the nail. Yeah, you know, we get together and, you know, Kayla and I and her and her fiance, we get together and we hang out for our kid's birthday party and then, you know, they don't i don't drink.

Speaker: Kayla don't drink. I'm the only one that drinks. Apparently, I'm um' I'm the... But... blame that yeah but yeah We still all get together and hang out and be there for the kids and have a good time. and Fuck yeah.

Speaker: I mean, i won't rule I won't rule it out, but not like we're planning like double dates where the four of us are going out anywhere or hanging out together. like like That's not but as far as the kids are concerned.

Speaker: We can definitely all get together. Oh yeah. that's just called being personable. Yeah. I don't know. She likes Kayla.

Speaker: don't know how... What is that, baby? Fuck yeah. You're just not taking them? You are so ready to fight to tonight.

Speaker: You're so aggro tonight. You want some of this? You see these guns? She don't want none of this. She don't want none this. She's like, nah, bro.

Speaker: You should be scared of me. Huh. Cus, look at me. Shut up, Johnny. Hey, you're supposed to have You're supposed to be my boy, Johnny. Johnny. Don't leave me hanging, bro.

Speaker: There was no disagreement here, all right? Johnny's on Team Kale. i Look. Come along Glick. You're a teddy bear.

Speaker: I am a teddy bear, Johnny Bongs. You're not wrong. She knows that, too. She could literally told me earlier. she's going She said, I'll cut you. yeah ye million Let all you all your ears run out. i was like, don't care.

Speaker: Whatever.

Speaker: You know, some people are into that kind of thing.

Speaker: Oh no Hey you ever piss so much and so hard That you just bubble up the fucking water In the toilet bowl What I better shut my mouth You better shut your mouth Mamacita Orale mamon All she's got to do is start slowly taking clothes off and Glick will be like, it's good. Whatever you said is fine. oh yeah I was already in a story and she was getting ready for bed and she was like, finish your story. Finish your story while you're taking a piss where you can taste it in your mouth or whatever you said. I don't know. And she was like, finish your story. Cheers, fuckers.

Speaker: che Cheers, Kayla, if you're awake again.

Speaker: who said cheers I heard her. I heard her. She's about to go get some snacky snacks. You're going to tear into the burritos. I introduced her to the greatest thing.

Speaker: well haven't eaten all day. Don't talk about food, man. The greatest thing God ever gave us or whatever spaghetti monster in the sky you believe in was a frozen burrito. And how and then how in years of life she's never had This delicacy that is known as a frozen burrito is beyond.

Speaker: I was at the store tonight and bought fucking six up them because they were three for like five bucks or some shit. I was back here one night, i don't know, a month or so ago, and I was eating them, and she was looking at it. i was like, you want to it? She was like, I've never had it.

Speaker: I just shoved in her face, and she took a bite, and she was like, oh, my God. Now slap a little barbecue sauce on top of that motherfucker, and you're set to go. Sour cream. i do you know Or sour cream, yeah. You know what I like you know i like to do?

Speaker: I like to um i think get tortilla chips or just regular potato chips, and I'll scoop all the innards out of it, and I'll eat it on my chip, and then i and then after i get the innards out, I stuff the chips in there.

Speaker: Because you got all the leftovers. Right, right, right. So you stuff the chips in there, and then you get the burrito and the innards, and maybe I'll get that. And then you get the, and then you get the tortilla chip or the potato chip, whatever it is that you are eating with it.

Speaker: Right. Tremagnolique as the French. My, my, my, my friends used to joke and shit because even though I'm not a bachelor now, back when I used to be, i used to make all kinds of weird fucking concoctions. Yeah.

Speaker: guys will be like, dude, you need to put a bachelor cookbook together. I'm sorry. No.

Speaker: well Oh, God. continue Yeah. Go mute while you get yelled at.

Speaker: Johnny, Johnny, how you been, man? Oh, yeah. It's been fucking fun. I've been busy. Yeah? With what? Drawing? Or what? ah No, actually, I've been busy to with family stuff lately, actually. I ah got to see mom for a little bit.

Speaker: Oh, cool. Oh, fuck yeah. If I can see her again next week for Christmas. that's nice. How often you and your sister? Huh?

Speaker: How often do you see your sister? So, the one... bad The one we saw on stream. Ah, okay. Uh, she's actually kind of helping me out here at the house right now.

Speaker: Okay. Yeah. Hell yeah. You got more? Cause you started sounding like you started talking about another one. Yup. I, uh, I got another one with, uh, got two nieces and a nephew from and her, she got the other half of my eight hours.

Speaker: So I see her a little bit whenever she goes to do those. Yeah. Yeah. Hell yeah. Yeah.

Speaker: You know, I mean, there's a lot of shit that goes on, but at the end of the day, that's all we really got is, you know, family. All right, dude, how do i say?

Speaker: Literally, without the the family system, there's crucial help that I've been getting that I wouldn't have that. Yeah. When we were up in Boston a month or so ago, it's the beginning of November when my brother died.

Speaker: Cause my other brother died like nine years. Yeah. Like nine years ago. And, uh, so me and my sister were up there and, uh, well, this, when we went back up this last time was for the funeral. So like her, her two daughters and her husbands went up with us. But, uh, after, after his funeral, me and my sister had about 20 minutes alone, you know, we were sitting there talking and shit. and You know, she started crying and, you know, I mean, it is what it is, right? Like we just put our brother, you know, in the ground and she's like, yeah so my, my brother that just died was the oldest. And then my sister is like two and a half years younger than him.

Speaker: and then my other brother was ah six years younger than you. And then he was like 10 years older than me. So I'm like the fucking accident in the family. Right.

Speaker: But, uh, so this was all crying and she was like, you know, she goes, what's, You know, and I'm hugging her, and i'm like, you know, consoling her or whatever, and she says, ah she goes, you know, she goes she goes, you know what's got me so upset right now? She goes, it's just me and you.

Speaker: She goes, it's just me and you left. She goes, you know, like Dave and Jimmy are fucking gone, you know, and I was like, shit, you'll probably fucking outlive me, sis, so don't worry about it, you know, but yeah, they were like, my oldest brother was like,

Speaker: ah Fuck. He left to go in the fucking Navy when I was like two, you know? ah So yeah I didn't, I didn't really fucking know him, but it was weird. Like I didn't know him cause I didn't grow up with him. I grew up, I grew up more like an only fucking child cause they were all out of the fucking house, you know? right Cause they were all fucking older than me. But, uh, it was funny with me and my brothers just passed the oldest of the family. Like, even though we didn't see each other, quite well, we definitely saw each other the least out of all the siblings. Right. Uh,

Speaker: But yeah we were we were cut from the same fucking cloth. Like, you know. Oh, boy, yeah. We would get together and he'd be like, man, I gotta. He goes, I wish you lived closer to me or I lived closer to you. was like, because we're so fucking much alike, man. He was like, we just cut up and, you know, just like laugh and same sense of humor and everything else. And, you know, so.

Speaker: But, yeah, it's like his his son my nephew it is fucking 50, right? Fucking 50. He's only 10 years younger than me. And but before, before going up, cause me and my sister went up like two weeks before my brother died to hang out with him and see him and shit. Like, you know, instead of like the next time we saw him was just at the funeral, you know?

Speaker: Um, but, uh, so yeah, I was, I was hanging out with Jeff and his wife and their three kids and like, like I said, his, his, my nephew's 50 and he's lived an entire fucking life. And the only way I've known him is like through Facebook and Instagram, you know, cause, cause we weren't around. They live up in Boston. I'm down in Kentucky, you know? So, but, uh, but it was, it was cool because again, going back to that whole family comment that I made, yes sir it's, it's, it's, it's like we grew up together, you know, oh yeah yeah just, just shooting the shit and laughing and, you know, the whole nine yards and,

Speaker: So yeah, I mean, and every family's got those, those issues and shit, you know, where some siblings don't get along and some do. And, you know, a a I'll be honest, whether it's, let's say conversations like, ah or if I'm with my family, then it, as much as I love my family, of course, like you just said, I said,

Speaker: there still is all this going on back here where I could be having a really deep conversation with my family and all of a sudden just go blank. Yeah. ah Yeah. What's up?

Speaker: Right. Right. No, I get that, man. I mean, I don't get it from your exact point, you know, because what you're going through whatever, but you know, I, I, I do get it. no, no, that's why of the things like,

Speaker: so so that It's a mantra that I have to put myself on. sorry It's okay. Even when that overstimulation hurts, that's why they're family. They're always there. They're family. They're always going to have your back.

Speaker: Right, wrong, or indifferent. For the most part. yeah you know yeah I had quite a few years man like after our parents died. in shit like my My brother... The brother that was 10 years older than me that died nine years ago, right? he never, never had his own home. you know, they always lived in apartments, whatever. And, you know, i was still married the time, you know, so me and my wife had our house. My sister had her house. My brother in Boston had his house.

Speaker: So when mom, you know, mom and dad died, when mom died, you know, i got with my two other siblings and I was like, Dave doesn't have a house, you know, let's just sell him mom and dad's house. basically next the, we, we sold him mom and dad's house for 10 grand, 10 fucking grand, dude. you know And it was like, I take it back. I take it back for 30 grand.

Speaker: And then each, each me, my sister, my older brother, we split. 30 grand three ways, so 10 grand apiece. And he got a house for fucking 30 grand, you know?

Speaker: You couldn't, I mean, way more than fucking fair, right? Like, here, you can finally have to have your own fucking home, you know? And economy I heard through the fucking grapevine, like, two years after the fact, he was, like, talking shit, you know? And, like, and I called him out on it, and I fucked into the bar that he hung out all the time, and I was like, hey, the fuck, man? You know, like,

Speaker: You know, that we could have put that house on the market for $180,000 and sold that shit and split it four fucking ways. And then, you know, but I was like, you know, we were trying to fucking do right by you.

Speaker: You know what I mean? So stupid shit, man. But, you know, that, so, well, after a couple of years, i was like, finally, I just buried the fucking hatchet. You know?

Speaker: So, what up, Britt? Welcome back, man. Good see you, Britt. I forgot where I was for a moment. Did you go over make new family and shit? yeah No, there's definitely not family, but you know, spread the word.

Speaker: Spread the word? yeah if made if i if i can If I can, I'm going to see about trying to make it up there for New Year's and shit. Hell yeah. that's that's Don't feel like obligated. No, no, no. i don't i don't I don't. feel I don't feel obligated. I mean, it's...

Speaker: you know As far as drives go, it's not that far. and It's like you know four four and a half hours or something like that. i think You heard me say, I got i got family in Mansfield. so That's only like an hour-ish

Speaker: south. I'm sure you do. When is New Year's? What day of the week is it on this year? Farts.

Speaker: I should know this. Because it's not a weekend, right? No. I don't believe so. love Calendar. It's on a Thursday. Okay, so New Year's Eve, the 31st is on a Wednesday. Going into the first on a Thursday. So your guys' show is on the 31st.

Speaker: Yeah, which makes it hard. It's So your your guys' show is Wednesday the 31st. So if I went for that, I'm sure, you know, because my sister's back in town um and she's up there. So, you know, I could probably go to your show and then, you know, book it from there and go down to Mansfield and, you know, spend two or three days with them. and Because I'm sure they'll be off that week between Christmas and New Year's. You know what i mean?

Speaker: so you have you You have some... That's my that's my older brother. hu That's old man Jack. I used to jam out with him. Wait, what what did what did you show us that for?

Speaker: Did I miss something? beer ah Old age. Oh, the beard. Old age. Thanks. thanks brit Now all of a sudden I'm fucking busy New Year's Eve, so fuck you. No, I'm just kidding.

Speaker: No, he's dope. I'm trying to get him to come out heism So did you get did you get the question I asked earlier about probably that people knowing Click? Because you you normally kind of have to know somebody to get... Because you guys are going to be roasting him and making jokes, and if people in the audience don't know who he is, they're not going to get it. that's that was what That's why I said that.

Speaker: Well, that's why we have been... so I haven't known him that long, and a lot of the jokes are very obvious. He puts them out to all of y'all as well. Right, right.

Speaker: But... Coming to know him and talking to him more. ah I've been trying to hold them back just so I can use them. Use them in the show. No, I get it. Later on.

Speaker: oh I mean, like the obvious one is like Sasquatch, more like Asquatch. oh So again, to my original question.

Speaker: Like, yeah is there going to be three people, five people, ten people in the audience that know who he is? It's probably and not going to be a lot, because who the fuck knows who he is? and That's why i said, when that's why I was saying, like, we're going to go live, and if anybody like has anything to say in the comments, like I'll read them out loud while we're live.

Speaker: That'd be weird because ah like if I am there, I'll be there live in person, but I'll be on my phone too in the fucking comments and shit. Well, that'd be funny as shit though. I'm not going to lie. I'd be confused, but I'd like it.

Speaker: That's the way I like it. So, okay. So you guys are going to go live and people can say shit live and you guys can be like, Hey, so-and-so just said blah, blah, blah, blah. blah well what What about for the people that are there?

Speaker: Well, I will. We're still figuring that out. They can still say a shit, too. like i'll um Can I suggest something? What's up? just Just have somebody designated to be walking around with a wireless mic and be like. Well, that's me. Anybody got anybody something to say? And then hand them the mic and let them say it.

Speaker: After I'm done with the little bit that I have to say, I'm going to be the one. Like, if you have something to say, you know, say it. Okay. All right. yeah Because I know the way my brain works, like and if you guys haven't caught it, like when we're up on pen on panels and shit together, I'll feed off of something somebody else just said.

Speaker: Exactly. You know what i mean? So yeah if you or Michael or whoever, whatever, they make they make a Sasquatch joke. yeah I might combine the two and be like, yeah, I've heard Sasquatch is like dingleberries cut tight to their assholes or something. like Whatever. Yeah, that's why I ask people about like crowd work and stuff like that.

Speaker: um Because I I react off of people's energies. Exactly. Right. Exactly. but yeah And that was that was the whole reason I asked, like, who was going to be there that might know him. That was the whole point to me asking that question.

Speaker: um the The shitty thing about it is that, like, Michael and I are probably two of the only people, which is why i came up with the idea of having the chat.

Speaker: But you also got this. So keep this in mind. He's going to be sitting up on stage, right? Yeah. All right. Motherfuckers in the audience that don't know him from Adam might come up with their exactly they can come up with their own shit about, oh, what the fuck, man?

Speaker: Glad to see you wore your new fucking flannel. You know, whatever. you know And then Arliss Walker, he's going to be there from the Southern Outlaws band. he knows him slightly, so he'll be able to say some shit. um Well, and the only reason I was asking about the whole like camera thing, it's just that's that's that's me. That's what I do, right? like I go somewhere, I got my fucking camera on me. you know So, not trying to steal anything from the videographer, but if I were to like take pictures, you know I might throw it past you guys and be like, hey, you guys cool if I use these six pictures and just throw out on my Instagram and the rest of them just like

Speaker: I can upload them to you guys' as you know the non school network server and whatever. It might just have to be a delayed showing of the pictures. yeah I'm not 100% sure about all of that. but yeah i if well Is the other dude just doing videography?

Speaker: He's not doing any photos, right? I believe so. i mean next so That could like work hand in hand as far as you guys all, as far as using them and Like I said, whatever I would take, I would edit and then I'd just throw them up on, you know, like I said, if Glick gives me space somewhere on the fucking server for Nonsensical, I would just throw them out there and be like, here, they're yours. Like, I'm not putting, I'm not putting any copyright shit on it.

Speaker: Just do it. Are you begging to be a part of the Nonsensical? No, no, no, no, not at all. Not at all. ah It could be email or send it, like, however, however you guys would want me to get them to you.

Speaker: You know you want Actually, I don't. I really don't. um I really don't. I was just saying whatever I do come up with, you know, the ones that are like good photos. I, what I'm saying is i would be more than willing to be like, I'm not looking for any money here. Here they are. You guys can have them do with them what you want. i think there are some Whatever. I'll get back to you on that. big moog pictures you take Any pictures you send me, I will gladly post on social media and with the proper social media tags or

Speaker: Yeah, i mean you can you can tell yeah you you can tag me or whatever. I will properly tag you. i just got to make sure we're following each other on social media. like the pictures The pictures aren't as important as like the video. so Right, exactly.

Speaker: Exactly. But with that being said, because I've shot a lot of bands and shit like that, right? Like, it's always good to have some stills for yourselves. You know what I mean? So that's what I'm saying. Like, if I if i took, you know ah ah you know, if I got a bunch of good pictures of you, Britt, while you're up there doing your your shit.

Speaker: I'm going to be like, here they're yours. Fucking do with them what you want. You know what I mean? for For people who are social media savvy, yes, the pictures will be essential. I've got a lot of really good pictures that I've got to um get up on social media.

Speaker: Because it's got to. Yeah, and see, I'm terrible about social media. like picture here Here's the weird thing about my photography shit. It's 100% word of mouth referrals. one ah it has been for 18 fucking years of doing it professionally, right? So, I'm terrible about putting shit out on social media. One, because I don't fucking have to. Most people that are putting shit on social media, they're doing it because they're trying to get their shit out there so they can get work.

Speaker: You know what i mean? and And I'm like, my my social media is just, it's fucking abysmal. It really is. Also, but arsenal

Speaker: As far as New Year's Eve goes, the only thing that pertains to the nonsensical network, the only thing that has anything to do with the nonsensical network or any other shows or what we do here is only the roast. The poor bastards that are paying for tickets, they could give two shits less about a roast of some guy they've never fucking heard about. And that's kind of what we were talking about while you were kissing kissing up to Kayla for pissing her off. so

Speaker: I didn't piss her off. um so And and and that and that portion of it in that portion of it will be live. But, yeah, i mean there's i mean, outside of going to support Britton and Michael, there's no reason for me to go to Warren. There's no reason for me to be up there.

Speaker: ah the day right right I can sit here in my house and and and they can do their roast. I've tried to do a roast of Glick three times on this network, but I was surrounded by idiots.

Speaker: I will say I wish I was kind of in a different place just because of past experiences. There's 100% no rhyme or reason for no rhyme or reason to have me or anything to do with this network associated with it other than it is another platform and it is another avenue for Michael to promote the show on. I love Michael to death and I will always promote his stuff, but that's the honest to goodness truth.

Speaker: This has nothing to do with the Nonsense School Network. It's all about Michael and it's all about Michael's comedy. And Britney, bitch. Britney Pits. Yeah, like I literally, there's no rhyme or reason for me to be there. Gun don't show up.

Speaker: At all. at all but they We're still going to roast you regardless. Yeah, I mean, if they're going to roast a guy, the audience is going to give a rat's ass about her and nobody in the audience is going to know anything. They're going to be like, who is this guy? Who is this guy? Exactly.

Speaker: so there What the hell is that? ah You're the one that brought it up. Why are you bringing it up? I didn't do this. I don't know who that is. That's me. I'm just showing you some photos of that picture.

Speaker: Oh, gotcha, gotcha. You need to warn a fucking sister first, okay? Warn a brother motherfucker? That's what people, like Kayla, like we went and seen Kissing Lilith. What do you think, you're part of network, motherfucker? We went and seen Kissing Lilith. Fuck you and this fucking cheesedick network, man. Kayla's a photographer as well.

Speaker: I am too, but I didn't go fucking saying. But Kayla took some amazing pictures when we went to go see Kissing Lilith. And I've got to get them uploaded. I've got to them uploaded and I've got to.

Speaker: video who is who Who did you say was a photographer? Video doesn't mean shit if I'm not allowed to put it on social media. No, I'm just kidding. Kayla's probably better than my dog. Probably.

Speaker: I mean, she she is very she is very good. I love photography because if I would get in a fight with my dad or something like that and get beat the fuck up, I would just go out in the woods and just take pictures of shit. And it would just like calm me down. Somebody just ding-ding. Who ding-ding? Who is that? Oh, it's homeschooling biscuit, mullet moon.

Speaker: What up, dude? What's happening, you know? What up, hoss? What the fuck? Yeah. Like, let's slice through the freaking tension. What up, bro? How you doing, mullet? How you doing, mullet?

Speaker: I thought you were getting your hair cut today. I slept all day. i literally just woke up like two hours ago. what What? What section of the country are you in? You're east coast, aren't you?

Speaker: so Yeah. Alabama. Look, and Pennsylvania. reason now Get a job. are you Pennsylvania swing and makes sense. That's why I try to stay out of it. Ha! What the fuck are you talking about? gu I live in Pennsylvania, but it's like 10 minutes away from the Maryland border, so it's still kind of... You hang out Maryland more than you do Penn?

Speaker: Oh, fuck yeah. Maryland is is said my home. What's up, ESO? Semper Fi, motherfucker. ESO's another jarhead.

Speaker: Thank you, baby. ESO's! Merry Christmas! is You guys have seen each other's assholes. I'm just repeating. No, but we can sniff them out in the crowd. I'm just saying.

Speaker: You're like, my soldier's down. We can sniff them out in the crowd. I believe that. The MoDog said I can't trust Esso because Esso likes the yellow crown.

Speaker: No, no, no, no. i already know. His favorite color is purple too, man.

Speaker: I'm just trying to cause chaos Dude, I'm almost out and run a Captain in Chaos is here Captain Chaos! Come on, bro, come on, I'll cheers with you Cheers, but I'm almost out, look What are you drinking, water?

Speaker: Always, she's always drinking water Is that Tito's real Texas vodka? No, it's the cheaper version of vodka is that Was it Smirnoff?

Speaker: Smirnoff? Yeah. they What up, Johnny? little shit water. Hey, brother. yeah Broke, bitch!

Speaker: I ain't gonna fuck with you about that. Shit. Shit, I ain't gonna fuck with you about that. My ass is broke as fuck. You all have been there. here I ain't gonna lie. ain't gonna lie. Caleb bought my beer tonight.

Speaker: What is that? Oh, it's a coffee cup. Nice. i dope That's her hot chocolate. On my Fleetwood Mac. It's on Fleetwood Mac. Nice.

Speaker: You didn't answer me earlier. Did you buy that or did you make that? No, it was a gift. It was a gift? night Alright. The reason I ask, you know you know the the like the spine of you know like the case that the cassettes are in?

Speaker: A friend of mine made back in my married days um a friend A friend of ours. No, she yeah, she made she made her like like a vase, right, like to put a plan in.

Speaker: But it was it was all, yeah, it was it was kind of cool the way they the way she did it And she color coordinated on them and shit. It was like pretty cool. So. That's why I ask if you made that or if you bought it or whatever. but Honestly, it would probably cost more to make it than it would just to get it for free. To buy it, yeah. I didn't even buy it. Brittany.

Speaker: It would cost more to buy it than it would be. Than to get to get a free gift, yeah. yeah you know What?

Speaker: tax your Hoss, you ready for Christmas, man? I got you the same fucking thing I got you last year. Just so you know. none do Not a fucking thing.

Speaker: Hoss is like, I got my sister. said oh so so much my sister wa My dad used to tell my mom every fucking year. It was like the same stupid fucking dad joke. He's like,

Speaker: I got my wife, same thing I got her last year. Pair socks and a pack of t-shirts, both them too big. So fucking stupid, Dad. Hoss is like, I got my sister slash wife some sexy lingerie.

Speaker: Now we don't do that. We don't do that here in PA. We're fixing it. Oh, come on now, Hoss. Yes, you do. Come on what? head he I'm going to meet you and Uncle all in the same day. Uncle Daddy, come on now.

Speaker: Come on. You're lying. You're lying. Why are you lying? That's diabolical. Uncle Daddy Huss.

Speaker: Get the fuck you out of here, Jenny. I just came across this picture. Uh-oh. Come on, Huss. Hang go give me Give me a second. I'm to come across that, too.

Speaker: Oh, God, man. That was awesome. It's just a sweet pic. We'll get better. Finally, something I can masturbate to. Fuck. ha Okay, can I show you? okay Wait, can you hold that up again, like full screen?

Speaker: Here's one of my wood burnings. It's too bright, dude. We can't see it. it Oh, there there you go. there go phone Oh, you made that? That's good. Yes, I know. That's a wood burning? Look, you can try having a little fucking humility, god damn it. No, am confident. Yeah, I know.

Speaker: Whatever. She didn't make that. yeah here's bota shit i fucking flea market that's That's beautiful. An all white screen. I bet that was hard to fucking do. ah very fucking Turn your brain just down, Brittany.

Speaker: right Tilt your phone. that's Wait, is that? Oh, I was going to use the all-white one. I thought that might have been a Jedi. Oh, that's cute.

Speaker: Oh, there you go. like It looks like just straight a straight-up fucking picture, right? You drew that? Is that ink? It's just pencil. that's ah That's fucking awesome, dude. i i got but yeah I got some artistic talent, too, but not on that level. No, no. Seriously. no yeah i used to I used to fucking draw all the time and shit, man.

Speaker: Well, I know. I've seen some of your photography as well. You have good angles. artistic ability is... Motherfucker, I know about an angle or two. Shit. He knows that angle. Nice. I used to draw. My son's my son's got a... a ah ah Fuck, man. I drew it in high school, man, for like art class or whatever.

Speaker: It's just like poster size of Wolverine. And my son went out and got it fucking like... He got it framed and all this shit. He's got it in his house. It looks look good as fuck. But it does not look on the level that you were drawing on. So...

Speaker: Oh, I'm very hyper-realism. I'm admitting you're a better better ah artist than I am. but I'm sure he's still good, but yes, I am. I'm fucking awesome. I'm going to say it.

Speaker: Basically what she said. Hey, you know what? If you got the skill, just like Kid Rock said, man, it ain't bragging if it's fucking true. If you're comparing me to Kid Rock I'm sorry. It ain't bragging if you back the shit up, Brett Keney. And I just did, bitch. It ain't bragging, motherfucker. You know, I'm just saying. I'm just saying. most this Ever fucking graced a podcast scene. but Fuck you, Joe Rogan.

Speaker: You bitch ass. I'm the best there is, the best there was, the best there ever gonna be. Johnny out of nowhere. Yeah, Glick. Johnny's like EF Hutton, man. Like, he don't say much, but when he does, everybody fucking hears it and listens, man. Hey, Johnny.

Speaker: my man is it I can smell your bullshit. You i ready for the Bills to lose today, Johnny? I can fucking smell your bullshit too, asshole. Go to hell, Hoss. It's not about you. It's about me right now.

Speaker: goes Yeah, Greg's getting his ass beat. Who are they playing? Who's the Bills playing today? The Browns? Yeah. Oh, yeah. The Bills are going to win. The Bills are going to win.

Speaker: Here's the thing. I need the Browns playing. and the browns and ring You want to know why the Browns are going to win? Because they have no business. And you know what?

Speaker: that's fuck that's That's not untrue. you know It's those teams that go in with like, fuck all, it doesn't matter, and then blowing out somebody. Either way, they're going to end up Brown. I'm going to say this. I'm going to say it on the show tomorrow.

Speaker: i'm gonna say you this If it's Brown, flush it down? Is that what you're going to say? Tomorrow, miles Miles Garrett sets the NFL record for sacks.

Speaker: Oh, come on now. Come on. Come on. feel he's in an on-sensical network. He's one and a half sacks away. bibleax He sacks Josh Allen.

Speaker: Not one. Not two. Josh Allen goes to the great Miles Garrett. josh allen goes down to the great miles gary Before you came back, we were talking about Brittany's clit piercing. So thanks for ruining that, Glick.

Speaker: The fuck, man? How dare you, Glick? It was a very great sensation. Okay, fine. It was fucking Hoss's clit piercing.

Speaker: I got super soaked when it happened. Hoss, I learn new things about you every day. Just by having known you for years. Just by having known you for years. No. know that the computer was pierced Do you guys know what a Prince Albert is?

Speaker: Yes. do Do you know why and where it came from? Do you know the history behind it? did I just want to hear you say it. Tell us. Supposedly, homeboy's dick was so long that when he would ride a horse, he he got that shit pierced so that he could strap it to his fucking leg so it didn't hurt him while he was fucking bouncing up and down on the horse.

Speaker: That's what the history says about where that came from. Okay, we're going to be here. We're going to be here. Look it up. Look it up, Britt. Look it up. Also, ah my my best friend, Ricky, his cousin is a tattoo artist and piercer. He has seven piercings in his dick. I can't even imagine. I mean, just just even hearing somebody say it and I cringe. Hold on a second. You know what, Britt? You open the door and I'm i'm walking through it Slightly. You have to squeeze through it. No, I done SWAT teamed this shit and I'm kicking the ball.

Speaker: He's got seven piercings in his dick. So does he have a Jacob Slider? I guess so. ribbed for her pleasure. you i mean that i like That's what a Jacob's Ladder is. Yeah. yeah yeah it's the i yeah I went to high school with the guy who had Jacob's Ladder. I'm sorry. Personally, I can only get the first rung. So, you know, whatever. A Jacob's Ladder is, yes, you did it. is a But he where there he went he went he went dit and then there was somehow it went dit

Speaker: I love how you just fucked right off for this conversation. Yeah, like like homeboy homebo talked about having his dick pierced.

Speaker: and it was And it was a lot was going on down there. And we all made we all made fun of him in high school. And we're like, shut up, dude. You fucking got a little dick. but And he was like, bam.

Speaker: He laid that shit on the table. I'm talking to Hoss right now because he's trying to check out. I shit you not. to the there our Our junior year and he just put this fucking elephant's trunk. Shout out to a white boy for having a dick this big. He did yeah pang just dropped it on the table.

Speaker: This motherfucker was pierced from tip to face.

Speaker: And then he had his fucking sack pierced multiple times. I just don't get it, man. He went full on shaft and he dropped everything on the table.

Speaker: wow hands so He's a tattoo artist. And he would sneak in like little dicks in people's tattoos. That I fucking appreciate. i mean, in a non-gay way, I appreciate somebody like, and their little touch-in and shit, and people don't even know it. If you're a tattoo artist and you sneak in a dick and I find it, I'm coming back to the show. Oh yeah, I'm beating your ass. Yeah, no doubt. One of my friends, we were telling him that story about the, he snuck in dicks and tattoos and he was like oh well I just got a tattoo done by him and we're like show us the tattoo straight up dick and balls and he was so mad he was so mad it was the whole thing looked like a dick and balls it wasn't even sneakily in there it was just look his ass just front and center like here you go yeah boy he was so upset and so he didn't he didn't see it until you brought it up

Speaker: yeah i mean that but I mean, take that for what it's worth, right? Because you know when you get a tattoo, you inspect that shit, man. Oh, for sure. And if he didn't fucking see it without it being brought you know pointed out to him,

Speaker: Yeah, and it was like a year and a half later. We're like, hey, because we brought up the conversation. Whoop your ass. And then we're like, wait, you got tattooed by him. Let's see your tattoo. And it was just like, bam. Do you have one?

Speaker: do you have one, Britt? No, no, no, I don't. Brittney does her own tattoos, but her tattoos wipe off. no I know her and Nils are on that stick and poke, man. um yeah i want i want to I want to so bad.

Speaker: i want do i want to do that polynesian tattoo. I want one so much. with the hammer? I don't think you can see it. Your tan line? Well, there is a tan line. But see right there?

Speaker: can See that little dark mark? it's only It's only a dot. When I was in high school, i yeah this a needle, toilet paper, and fucking indie ink. I put a fucking cross on my wrist.

Speaker: glick well Glick might not know this. Back in the day, for all you young fuckers, it was cool in the late seventy s early 80s to have like the... Did you ever have like a really wide ah like watch pan made out of leather?

Speaker: No. Alright, so Glick knows talking about. I had that for years, probably three or four years, my parents didn't know because it it was underneath that fucking that yeah leather strap.

Speaker: Tied up on your arm. And then and then my dad saw it one day because I fucking made the stupid mistake of like sitting at the dinner table without it on. He was what the fuck is that on your wrist? And he made me sit there and fucking dig it all out with a fucking knife. was like, God damn. Yo, I'm surprised my dad didn't do that because like, this is steak and poke. I have a dad. When I was... Whatever.

Speaker: Did you do your toes, Britt? hey You just want to see my toes. No, no, no. I said, did you do your toes? Yeah, I did stick and poke on my toes. I didn't know if you did them or somebody else did them.

Speaker: yeah I don't want to see no Flintstone motherfuckers. Go climb a tree, bitch. God damn. I have like a heart right here, but I'm not going to show you all that. Okay, that's the one I want to see. Oh, no, no, no, because I'm no no because ah walk already know what you're gonna say when she'd be sitting on the bed in his style in her shorts but when she first started coming on shows been used to scare the life out of me i already know what you're gonna say when she'd be sitting on a bed and is' thou in her shorts

Speaker: with their shorts on and then she was just put on her vagina. You probably got little pink in my vagina. Her vagina's gonna pop out and we're gonna lose our YouTube channel.

Speaker: I gotta let her breathe. That's how you let her stay clean. Her vagina never came out. But it was a legitimate fear because it was just... Well, I did good. I covered it up. Well, i I laugh about it because I think the very first time I came up on panel, you you were talking to her about that because she was sitting on the bed and she had on some like yellow SpongeBob fucking underwear shorts or some shit. that It wasn't SpongeBob, but whatever it was. she did It was light colored and Glick was like... oh good good look

Speaker: like but she she did I was like, this bitch about to show her minge off to everybody. Fuck. She did very good, but it was a legitimate like it was a legitimate fear that I had. I was like, oh my God.

Speaker: How are you going to pay after yeah I feel like I've been around for a minute now, man, because I was like here for some of that shit. After everything we've done and everything we've said on on this show in particular, I'm like, this is what's going to kill us. This is what's going to kill us.

Speaker: Her vagina is going to pop out and we're dead in pocket. It probably Eventually it probably will. Stay tuned everybody. Stay tuned. Reason to come back Hoss.

Speaker: Britt is always doing good. This is a shout out. This is not me hating on you Britt. She's always been great about making sure that she keeps She's angles proper. My junk. junk. She was a newbie.

Speaker: Shout out to Brick. She made sure that like there was no... I knew what was up. like I understand. I'm pretty sure that was the first the very first panel I was on on your show. It was one of those when you were like, God damn it, Brittany. You're giving me a heart attack over here.

Speaker: That don't mean I wasn't terrified. when she was' She knew it. I think she fucked with me. I think she just did it. just the fucking thing I think that's what it was. yeah I'm tired of talking about my vagina. What is that? It's not?

Speaker: i Well, you guys know I have Tourette's, and when I was getting the Brit... No, no, this tattoo. You know what they call those in prison? I don't care. i had a tick, and I accidentally hit his tattoo gun, and he was like, what was that? i was like, oh, I'm sorry, i had i had a tick, I have Tourette's. And he was like, why didn't you tell him that? I was like, I fucking did mad why have i why Why have we never seen your Tourette's come out on panel?

Speaker: That'd be cool to catch sometimes. You just don't realize that we see it. We see it every week. Except for tonight because I behave like so. Really? hi really i i every my god here it goes Every Saturday night. come out.

Speaker: i didn't lose every day but it it saturday night Did you have that when you were in school? I would have loved to have had that like when I was in school. For those are you for those of you while it doesn't matter for those of you watching, because nobody ever will even understand or know what the fuck I'm talking about, but New Year's Eve, if you're watching live, when it comes to the roast of me, her Tourette's will be on full display. Yes, it will be. So, okay, so I'm interested, like, from a curious standpoint, Tourette's as in yeah body tics or language or? Yes. Both. All of it. Both.

Speaker: Really? Hey Maggie Maggie We're all dog in life One mile at a time Ass ass is one of them if you've heard the and I'm sure you've heard me say that that What is it?

Speaker: Ass ass is one of the things yeah Okay I do um Sometimes it can get bad and I'll hit myself I've given myself black eyes before i im move i please Please do that right now Please we got you you hit your fuck out of yourself Please beat the fuck out of yourself right now.

Speaker: So what so on a serious note not to like bring shit down but what's what's that like to live with? Well I mean I've lived with it for years so it's kind of I just make a joke out of it honestly and I got a free tattoo out of it. There you go. There you go.

Speaker: Win-win.

Speaker: It's just three dots but whatever.

Speaker: Ink, ink, it doesn't matter. i it it is It does suck, though, because, like, the physical ones, like, I tensed up, and it, like... Well, see, not not knowing and not watching, I don't think I've ever noticed like when you've had a tick or or whatever. I can trigger them. and and Yeah, you can. and do have Do it. no Do it. Do it. He already has. He already has. I have. No, if I did tonight, it was 100% unintended.

Speaker: Well, I need another beer, and I got to piss, so don't do it until I get back. and but it was just It just happened, but it was because we're talking. He's just too dumb to realize, I guess. Yeah, he doesn't he doesn't catch them.

Speaker: Hey, fuck both of you guys. i i did nothing I did nothing to trigger them tonight. But I feel bad because I know the physical stuff.

Speaker: Like, the physical stuff sucks. So that part of me feels bad. But when you're like, That's funny. that's funny yeah i It makes me feel bad. God, you dickhead.

Speaker: I feel like I have to be like John Madden. have to call it. what i like That's what makes me feel like it. I just wish when I triggered them as much as when I do intentionally trigger them, it makes me laugh.

Speaker: But when I trigger it, it also triggers triggers the physical side of it, which then I'm like, oh. Not always. Not always. No, not always. Not always. But a lot of the time. You just did the vocal part of it.

Speaker: And that that that makes me feel like it's shit. Because the physical side is triggered. And I just want the vocal. Well, the physical part sucks just because you can't stop it. The next day, you're just so sore. You can't sleep. can't really like it fucking sucks i didn't do anything tonight and i didn't do anything last week either however however she just glitched out she just glitched out she just it was a pretty glitch don't don't make your thing a part of my thing oh i love you heart nuggets anyways um But I love you. hope you know that.

Speaker: Fuck off. so Wow. So much love. I love you too. That was a tick, dude. That was a tick. I know. I know because you sound like a chicken. ah It's a cox. Get it right.

Speaker: Oh, sorry. You sound like a rooster. but She sounded like Heihei off fucking Moana. All right? Settle down. What's going on, K-Mag? ah He's the best character. of Right? Shit. I agree with her. Heihei is the No care in the fucking world other than eating and trying to stay safe.

Speaker: Britt and i have been loving each other all night tonight. We've been agreeing with each other. We've been nice to each other. You're a lying sack of shit. No, I'm not. No, he's we've been actually been nice to each other for the most part. I'd i'd say it's like 75%. All right. Yeah, we fucked with each other.

Speaker: We fucked with each other, but for the most part, we're... Bye, bye, bye. Wait, is that NSYNC that sings that song, or is that 98 degrees? It's NSYNC. Backstreet Boys. Or Backstreet, yeah. Backstreet Boys. What was I thinking?

Speaker: I don't know. Definitely not 98 fucking degrees, but I can tell you that. said 98 degrees, and you just went with it, K-Mag? You fucking douche. No, I said NSYNC, and they said Backstreet Boys. I'm like, i yeah. Who said NSYNC or Backstreet Boys?

Speaker: Brittany said her backstreet voice. Yeah, it is. Bye, bye, bye. Bye, bye. Brittany's bye, bye, bye.

Speaker: Yeah, you're not wrong. Wait, what? Perfect time to come back.

Speaker: They come on her back? look here now You have both? Technically both. You've got her fucked up, right?

Speaker: Yeah, I guess i've i've just I've never paid enough attention to it. I just thought you were like like a hyper kind of. of kind of person and shit I've never paid attention to it as far as if your Tourette's is like cussing I mean fuck that wouldn't stand out on this fucking network so it does when she does it because it's pretty sporadic cheers cheers brother people don't notice it until I don't notice it I don't blame that dude I used to have something like that I still kind of do but mine's more like twitching

Speaker: well there's that's because you spoke too much fentanyl settle down but don want can cut my brain open 14 times I'm sorry say my might be a result of having third less brain than everybody else so i'm pretty sure it's the 14 brain surgeries yeah were while you're touching your butthole.

Speaker: And he's still smarter than you. And I was. Wait, now, you're single-party toilet. I was like, you know i love you, girl. And she was like, paul no, no. Let me play this shit back.

Speaker: and it was Yeah, I need to get that clipped. It was her dress cake day. there that She was like, oh, me too, bro. And I was just like, damn. Now if I see something going forward, I'm just going to think she's doing it just to fuck with me. like since i said Since I said I never really paid attention to it. Normal Brittany demeanor is this right here where she talks and communicates and then all of a sudden out of the blue it'll be like ass, ass, ass.

Speaker: Yeah, ass, ass has been like my main one. Or fuck off. yeah I go through phases of things. A lot of a lot of times a lot of times, I'll purposely... Glick is horrible about just randomly triggering the mobile part of ah please sounds um yeahly I'll purposely trigger her and send her down that road. But the last the last couple of few weeks, I've been nice. I got yelled at.

Speaker: has't been a few weeks It's been like two was I will say this. At first, Kayla was not a big fan of Brit. And now she loves Brit.

Speaker: Like, she was like, oh my god. ru he could He could have left that first part out. but Kayla loves Britt. She said not like Britt, but know now that I know she has Tourette's. No, no, no, no. I pity like her. had nothing do with Tourette's or anything like that.

Speaker: but It was its at the very beginning. and and came love and kaa loves you, for just so you know. She's so excited to meet you. She's so excited to see you.

Speaker: right ah bullshit got yelled at. I got yelled at because I'm going to be on that plan. It's fucking hilarious. Britt knows it's funny. on that like pop but it's fucking hilarious and then and and and and brit knows it's funny and it's And it's just what I And yeah i was like oh shit handle it But if it was like oh shit the physical side of it yeah The physical side of it I'm like oh wow I am an asshole It's still hilarious But I'm an asshole But if it does come too far I will say something Or I'll leave

Speaker: that's why made it very clear during her stand-up if have to go to the back the room and i of the flick i that's why i made it very clear during her standup if i have to go to the back of the room and not be where she can see me i will because i don't want to fuck up her stand her actual standup now the question is lick i If I trigger her, I'll trigger her. That's fair game, bitch.

Speaker: Yeah, was going to say it's a roast. No, honestly, I kind of want you to be up front. Because she'll feed off of that shit. If I'm up front, only going to be up front to support you. I hope you know that. No, no.

Speaker: yeah What you got to be doing, Blake, is you got to sit in the cuck chair next to her so she can roast you right on the stage. no Oh, no. The stand-up part. I apparently will be, I apparently I'll a chair, I'll be up on stage.

Speaker: During the roast call, I fully 100%. Oh, I, I, I, I so hope, and attack me for sure I so hope there are people in the audience that don't know you from fucking Adam Glick, but based on, just based on your appearance and like things that you might say that they just jump in and fucking roll with it, you know? I'm, in my belt with it like I'm bringing my belt with me and I hope they He's going to be gay in four languages with that belt. I'm going to i'm gonna need my own dedicated microphone. I'm just saying. I have been telling everybody about it and i'm like, just go back and watch the videos. Get to know him. Hold it up Hold on. What you should do, Glick, is figure out a way to bring up like...

Speaker: panel members. Dude, that's what I was just about to fucking say. I'm going to have it live and I'm going to be reading out the panel members that can't make it for the actual show. Would it put certain people on a speaker occasionally so they can roast you and then cut to the next person as well?

Speaker: think about When she's on stage and when she's roasting me, I 100% fully fucking intend to and descending her into 100, like, completely... Which haven't really been working on the road. Fuck, Britt gonna be on stage like...

Speaker: number so full-on Tourette's fucking syndrome breakdown, man. Fuck. This is gonna look like a fucking rave happening up on stage, alright? Calm down. Which is why I haven't worked on the roast as much because I know that's what's gonna happen. already know, so like, fuck it. But no, don't hear stand-up. I will not in any way, shape, or form fuck with her.

Speaker: i I... That's next weekend, right? It's next weekend. Brittany, I hope you understand. I hope you understand that I mean this from the bottom of my heart. I'm going to be your biggest cheerleader. Wait, wait, wait. That's not next weekend. It's the weekend after. Oh, and I'm the fucking retard. Okay. There's no doubt I'm retarded. Fuck you, Britt.

Speaker: Love you, hate you. love you hate yeah Late you. Late you. ah Hopefully I'm not late. I will be Brittany's biggest fan when she's going to stand up.

Speaker: Yeah, I'm just choked When it comes to... I will be the biggest sass. I thank you, Gleg. You're my big bro.

Speaker: got you, girl. Well, don't fuck with her too bad at the roast part because I want to hear her roast you. I don't want you to like wow i send her into a fucking spiral or some shit, man.

Speaker: Well, a lot of them are very obvious and I think a lot of us have the same jokes for the roast. um I've come up with a few others. Can I just shout shit out from the audience? No, that's what I'm saying. We're going to be live, so and I'm going to reading the comments. I'll be like, MoDog said blah, blah, blah. MoDog might be there in person.

Speaker: We're trying to get MoDog there person. fucking can better be. That's what saying. If I am and I'm in the... You know how hard going be for me to like just sit there and not say something until I have a mic in front of me? I'll give it to you. I was just going to yell up and shout, where's the bitch? Oh, sorry. That's my opener.

Speaker: Come on. Hold You got Brent saying it and you got me saying it. We will give you the microphone. And that's why I was talking to Michael. I was like, we can't say the same joke, so, like, the same roast towards Glick, so we had it we gotta get it. I'll just make some shit up. shit will be fictional.

Speaker: Remember like mar night time you were licking my butthole? a little like never Before fucking Brittany trimmed my fucking dingleberries? You know. yeah you what And you were like, and that's why Brittany does that? what about it is I'll be like, yeah, dude. Word. Word, dog.

Speaker: Those white shrieks have beaten in his beard, I remember that shit. What is my life? I remember that shit. It had a a nice corn taste to it.

Speaker: Nice corn taste. I don't remember eating any corn. Only Dingle Bears I ever tasted like fucking a peanut butter shit, man. The fuck? Peanut butter, tomato, oh dog go have to lay purple cra and crayons. Oh, I gotta go get at least two purple crayons to bring with me if I make it up there.

Speaker: red one So we can pose for a picture and shit with him. Yeah, yeah. I made a signature. i with a purple gri if If you make it up, let me know. I'm going to get the jumbo purple crowns. I'll go. Oh, maybe he'll actually show up on time.

Speaker: i might i'm like I might have to jump in on Amazon after we're done here. I'm working a half day, Britt. I'm only working until 11 o'clock. There's only two things in life. Yeah, you're not showing up to nonsense dinner. That dinner? Because he's never missed a meal.

Speaker: You don't have to. I'm not getting, again, none of this has anything to do with me. I'm not getting paid to be here. Okay, so don't get butt hurt that not on the flyer then. Don't get butt hurt, but you're not on time for your own roast. I have to work. So New Year's Eve, I have to work. I'm working. Bitch, you just said you only got to work till 11.

Speaker: Yeah, um' and I'm coming home. What time is a or what? if were here hear taking day and a half off.

Speaker: Look. You're good. It's all good. what what what what you guys will' understand is i'm literally taking a day and a half like work to be look what you're good it's all good Even though you left the wedding early, you didn't go to the i went the wedding. early how far How far are you from there?

Speaker: Time-wise. How long? Two and a half hours. Okay. So I'll be up there by like... Again, you get off at 11. The show starts at what? 7? 8.30. Oh, it starts at 8.30.

Speaker: oh ah it starts at eight thirty The guy who's not getting paid, the guy who's not even a part of the show... Oh, quit your fucking whining. Shut up. Shut up. Shut up. Shut up. Shut up. Shut up.

Speaker: I'm going to be a Megan for a second. I'll take a turn. Um... Gabby. So no, the the night before, Michael and Sue are having a dinner and you can't make that. No, i can't make that. That's what I was saying. I can make it. I can make it in his behalf.

Speaker: they they're doing and doing and They're doing brunch the day before and I can't make either because I have to work. yeah i me yeah work is the question You did. You absolutely did.

Speaker: I'm not even going to lie, man. I texted Jersey like hours ago and I was like, hey, because I just got home and she just got home from like the urgent care and shit. was like, so and so and so and so and so and so is on panel. want to jump up and say hi.

Speaker: ah I don't like being mean. It doesn't.

Speaker: Nobody said nothing but not liking anybody. We're not going to say names. We've got to have conversations after this show is over. Let's just say they're Australian. Jesus. I am so glad.

Speaker: i but So but so the dinner the dinner the day before. ro great bri have to work let's be real at least have to work bri yeah other than that like Brittany, I gotta give you the kudos. I gotta give you the acculations.

Speaker: Y'all are just too big of ball sacks to say anything. i know because No, because I i i say shit when she's on here. All I'm is a bunch of excuses.

Speaker: The words are hard. You are in charge of the back door. army me And in if you say, then they do. If you say no, then they don't. and and i love being able to to pass it off to somebody else i'm a doer i'm not being the boss i said it earlier about oh you're late i'm not late seven ish that gives you 7 00 pm to 7 59. that's why you made a whole new i I'm just going to say an at hour and a half backstage. That's all I'm going to say. Who's the dinner the night before for? Look at me changing subjects. out

Speaker: salot don Shout out to Brittany, the keeper of the back door. She does a great job. yes Yeah, she does. she yeah she does yeah he's the right door a pig Scissors and all, man.

Speaker: I mean, I have no balls. Whatever you want to say, but Brittany is a great keeper of the back door. Look, who am I? I'm going to do an impersonation. I don't do many um Here's one of Tell me what panel I was on who I am.

Speaker: like like i was like, God damn. him him i've been this but no No fucking fear hiding it. She was like, Oh, fuck this. I was like, God damn.

Speaker: I literally had to go off fucking camera so I could fucking laugh. I was like, fuck. Who are you talking about right now? oh Some chick that doesn't come here anymore. Tarantula?

Speaker: no no i yeahat mean No. I was about the chick that's on fucking panel right now. Who's on panel right now? ah Fucking Britney. God damn y'all some slope brain motherfuckers aren't you? Jesus Christ.

Speaker: I was gonna say. I was gonna say. um She got so fucking fed up that night. Literally rolled her fucking head like three times. Came back with a fucking eye roll and was like click. I was like fuck.

Speaker: yeah I thought you were talking about Lazy Shaman because I have literally been backstage on the Lazy Shaman show. Oh, I have too.

Speaker: And then Jedi and then Jedi, and I love Jedi. Jedi and Shaman are my guys. I love those fucking dudes. And then Shaman was like, well, we're done, but we're going to bring it back.

Speaker: really and and i was And I was messaged and was like, yo, come up on the panel. And I was left and i'm like, I'm backstage. I texted a Jedi one time on his cell phone and said, bitch, I've been back here 45 minutes. I've ever done redecorated the whole fucking backstage, man.

Speaker: yeah I've swept clean, fucking redecorated the whole nine, man. practice like's all they're blaing up other They were bringing up other people.

Speaker: And then one night, I was live on TikTok. of course Of course you were. was live on TikTok. Hold on a I'm not going to lie, dog. That's where me and that goofy motherfucker met was on TikTok.

Speaker: i've i've still not i'm like I have a TikTok account, but I rarely fucking get on it. But the next time I do get on it, I'm going fucking sub his ass, man. ah like I do it with the memes. like And they're funny shit that pops up on TikTok. Not because that goofy hair looks bad. Right. Okay.

Speaker: Keep telling yourself that, man. We get it. We get it. Well, I was a joke. 100% of something is better than I'm just going to say, I've heard so much about the fucking like Glick thirst traps that I'm like, I'm not going to lie. I'm i'm as straight as they fucking come.

Speaker: But I'm fucking curious to see what the fuck he does on there. you I love giving him a big head about his belt. Because the big head about his belt depends on the alcohol content. like I'm the fucking champ. I'm like, you're the champ of sucking dick. Shut up.

Speaker: i just I can't imagine Glick on there doing thirst traps. i'm just I just can't imagine it. so Oh my gosh. Seeing his little reels he posts of his selfies. I am curious to check some out.

Speaker: Are they still there? Are they still there? Bring one up, Britt. Bring one up. And full screen yourself when you do it. Because I know my girlfriend earlier was like, I didn't sub bullshit. She subbed like a motherfucker. I know she didn't. Yeah, I'll just be like, I'll be like, wait, girl. Hold on a second. Hold on a second. Hold on a second.

Speaker: In Jersey's defense...

Speaker: Dude, I don't care if she did something. I don't care. Jersey popped up, and and it was people you may know. I was like, oh, it's my girl Jersey. Let me follow her. Just like I would do for you. I'd be like, oh, it's MoDog. That's my guy. Yeah, I don't care. I didn't expect her to follow me back, but she followed me back. It was like, Jersey viewed your profile. don't want to...

Speaker: Oh, shit. Oh, Jersey. I said, no, Jersey, don't do that. Oh, no. no where Were you gone? Did you step away or did you hear what I said?

Speaker: When I was like, I can't imagine you doing thirst traps, or is that part of me that wants to sub just so I can see what the fuck you're doing on there? Dude, I will promise you... This motherfucker's doing a floss in the background. My main account... If I see you on there doing this shit... No, trust me, that's not what you're going to see on there. I'll promise you that. That's Brittany's job, all right? No, my my my main account... um I had 13 plus thousand followers never have never never did a thirst trap I day straps and

Speaker: and and i started to tip into the world of bench traps and

Speaker: Yeah, unfortunately, don't know if I, it's not me, I don't do thirst. Goddamn, dude, get the dick out your mouth. Fuck, Jesus. I don't do thirst. Yeah, thank you. Like, I'm not the guy who's going to do thirst, stress, but at the end of the day, mean, sometimes you got to do what views and likes and clicks get you. So if I got to take my shirt off,

Speaker: if I gotta be in my boxers and no I don't think I you judge me as you will Brit don't think I haven't thought about doing thirst traps on the nonsensical network tick-tock page so away I swear to God, if you do it, I'm tired Oh, okay. Nobody else is doing anything. i'm know nobody and and you know what Wait, great see, it I didn't even know there was one. so In all fairness, boy, if you go to the fucking Bible, that's part of this entire show. I just said I rarely get on fucking TikTok.

Speaker: But in all fairness, in all fairness, and I'll say this. The last time I did, i saw fucking... I'm not going to say it, man. I'm not going say I saw Hoss's dick on TikTok, but whatever. thought you saw Hoss. Oh, is that what I saw? And you didn't show me first? I thought it was an acorn. Hoss is like, nah, bitch, that was my sister wife. And you didn't show me first, you fucking asshole.

Speaker: I'm sorry. I'm sorry, Johnny. I thought we were close. On the Not-School Network TikTok page, When multiple people had access to that page, nobody was posting anything except for me.

Speaker: And now... Does Brittany do the female version of thirst traps? I have no idea. It was months. I was like, y'all need a chick on your channel. That's still called a thirst trap, right? Okay, I'll take it. Whatever, you're fine.

Speaker: No, I'm asking. oh Sure, if if if that's what it is. Yeah. Let's be honest. No one comes here to see silver. a Patreon.

Speaker: las v is they be honest yeah i've been called out we have a patreon and we do have a patreon and And a cash where's my money ditch Yeah, bitch. Well, any money that comes into the network goes to the network. So the only... Suspect. ah know So let me let me let me let me counter your where's my money, bitch.

Speaker: Yeah, you have Kayla taking care of everything. shows go she is not. Oh, Kayla's on her thirst trapping? I'm subbing right now, goddammit. No, she is not. Kayla does see TikToks. No, she is not. As the only one who has paid for everything and anything that has been needed to be paid for this network.

Speaker: yeah Yeah, and yes and and and and before my words before my words get twisted, the words get twisted and and a whole ass other narrative is created, Blaze Oh, Blaze isn't here.

Speaker: When Blaze was here... oh you got kids on your TikTok? He was helping me for the stream yard. he was helping me pay for the stream yard not Not every month, but Blaze was... And Blaze did, and I didn't ask him to, Blaze took it upon himself to say, how much does StreamYard cost? Let me help you pay for it. He was paying for a half of

Speaker: Again, not every month, not all the time, and but I never went after him or I never asked him or I never said anything because everything has been related to the this podcast and or the network I have taken upon myself.

Speaker: I will say... Shout out to Jersey because Jersey is a big proponent of our cash app. She has sent money and thank you, Jersey.

Speaker: I greatly appreciate it I don't expect anybody to send money. and and and And I got yelled at. Jersey yelled at me and told me to shut the fuck up because I was going to send it back to her.

Speaker: i I wish she would tell you that right now. God damn it. Shut the fuck up. So no. So no. Like right now currently any money at all that comes into the network goes back into the network. I'm not talking to you.

Speaker: Have I made money in the past? Yes, I have. Yes, I have. When were on Habs, we made like $100. You guys want to follow me on my new podcast?

Speaker: Follow her on her new podcast. Well, Brittany's going to learn much like everybody else has learned. Dude, I i have already had a podcast. She has me or my name on It was like...

Speaker: we had thirty one thousand followers like I used to do it with my ex-fiance. That's OnlyFans. That doesn't count. and What have you brought to the Nonsensical Network? that' That's on OnlyFoot. Yeah, right?

Speaker: and What have I brought onto the Nonsensical Network? of A vagina? That's what she just brought. Some pretty eyes that people like.

Speaker: did y'all did y'all see my fucking hashtag in the chat what the fuck man bre i love you yeah yeah what you so stock mother i'm a chick that can hang with all your bullshit you know what you do i gotta give you major props man you put up with some bullshit on here you do um hundred hey i look i'll be honest of you i I treaded lightly when Britt first came on here, and then once I realized that she's one of the guys and she's going to bring it just as much as we bring it, I'm like, nah, fuck it.

Speaker: We're going to get her. i go And I go at her harder than anybody else. She gives it right back. Yeah, now Rick brought me on. He was like, she can hang. And you guys were like, I don't know. who dare That's the name I don't even know. Who's Rick?

Speaker: Rick is. He does the football shit. he's Oh, Rick. Okay. okay okay okay this i will I will always remember him for calling me out the fucking one time he saw me on there. It was just in the last month.

Speaker: that I put some. Yeah, yeah, yeah. I know who you're about typed something Sunday football stream and he's like, who's this crayon-eating motherfucker?

Speaker: I was like, I like the dude, man. yeah a like i playing in your a ring I'm just curious. does that Brett Kershaw in the back? It is.

Speaker: Okay. It is. no that Pull it back up. Pull it back up. like That all came about because we were on stream like three weeks ago and I said, man, you ought to have you and I was talking to Jedi or not Jedi. Fuck. Scotto.

Speaker: I said, you ought to put them together. and like the joke of the night that I said was, or not the joke of the night, but the joke I said was, you gotta have them fucking touching belly buttons and their link gets stuck together and then you like separate them with a credit card. And he did he did everything but the credit card part and then he added Bert to the background because later conversation.

Speaker: Yeah. Well, I feel like my joke was better. like Whatever. Whatever. who who's who's got Who's got a picture of it? I'm just saying. Who's got a comedy special in there? I fucking get fired. Apparently Michael does. Ha ha!

Speaker: so And he brought me up there for a reason, eh? Hey, vagina is needed everywhere, even on comedy specials. What are you Vagina is like Rain Man, okay? Everyone's gonna love it, regardless.

Speaker: Well, i see, that's the thing. of A lot of female kind comedians, thank they talk about vaginas all the time. I'm just so over that. Huh. Yeah, i hate I hate when women talk about vaginas. It's just so disgusting. It's just like it's not always relatable.

Speaker: I'd rather talk about balls. shit Of course you would, you fucking slore.

Speaker: There's a reason you're not allowed back in the Pentecostal church. I'm just saying. Well, they have snakes. Wrong type, but yeah, they do.

Speaker: Yeah. Well, no, we didn't have snakes at my church. I'd love to go to one of those, man. See some motherfucker there wiling out with a two handfuls of snakes and shit.

Speaker: I have one of my friends right now, but like speaking in tongues or whatever, like are you Slytherin? Yeah, I don't fucking buy that, man. I think motherfuckers are just getting up there like just slurring some shit out, man. They're a part of Slytherin. Every time I go take a piss, I handle big old snake. This motherfucker being all delusional again and shit. Settle down.

Speaker: Motherfucker. The biggest acrine I've ever seen. Quit grabbing a plunger, motherfucker. What the fuck? yeah Rib for his pleasure. It's okay.

Speaker: just not so bigger than your I've had your back more often than not, man. yeah Had it, been on it, whatever. like whatever Had it, been on it, came on it. wait wait I'm surprised your boy hasn't showed up tonight, man.

Speaker: but both oh come in you a what it small mom I had He's been so silent, had to show it. what the well i appreciate that we do too johnny <unk> I'm glad Tony can enjoy me out of that. This is the only stream where you can come on and act gay as fuck and still be straight.

Speaker: I guess so. Holy shit. See? Exactly. It's a fucking trail go no the What did Cinderella say when she got to the ball?

Speaker: Yeah. Yeah, exactly.

Speaker: exactly

Speaker: Don't show that. You're going give that motherfucker a big just wants to show off his good ones. that's what i haven't seen that one. haven't seen that one. that's that's all That is an awesome pick that Scotto did. and And this is really good because... It could be real. It looks like it could be real.

Speaker: Yeah, well, and this is something Michael and I are going to do. We're going to do a lot of. You're going to see me pop up on a lot of Friday nights here coming soon. So we're going to see your dick. Got it. Michael and I are going nerd out and talk lot about it. So are there any more Britney ones or just the three that I've seen? Just the three you've seen.

Speaker: mean yes That one, that one, and that one because others have said The The dookie one's the best one or love by I'm sitting on my carpet And fuck all of you motherfuckers yeah I might be shitting I might not like There's me showing up at the year I take credit for that Because the first one he had a suit jacket on I said no you need to put that motherfucker in his dress flannel That's me showing up the year

Speaker: No, that's you New Year's Eve right there, bitch. So imagine the sound when their belly button comes. dude, it's going to sound like macaroni noises. But not in a good way. oh

Speaker: I promise you. I'm telling you, it's this. That's it right there, man. can tilt it. Oh, good job. Okay, here's this other trick. Put your hand between your legs. I'm going to teach how to make that but um' i'm a teach you how to make that same sound like me you're leaving

Speaker: uncle grandpa uncle my name is uncle grandpa Papa, more dog. Papa, more dog. That's close, man. You know what? when when when ah when i had When we had our first grandkid, like like I didn't give a fuck. like Call me whatever you want, so we let the kids like pick. Of course, my ex-wife and her fiancé were like, no, we need to be called bla bla blah, blah, blah. I was like, they call me whatever they want. I told my daughter. I said, I don't care. And they came up.

Speaker: I'm Poppy. take check Take that for what it's worth. Poppy was my grandpa. I know, but to me, Poppy meant something completely different Yeah, no, that's why if I was to date a Hispanic guy, I can't say daddy Poppy You can't call him Poppy in the streets, alright? You still gotta call him daddy Because my grandpa was Poppy Yeah, call him Steve Yo, the next time I'm gonna call him Or here's a great idea Here's a really good idea, Brittany Call Ice

Speaker: How dare you

Speaker: um good making funies no i've literally debated on calling i son some folks alleg oh don't coli on me because they're great disappointed when they get here okay fuck off um but he asked um how dare you we call ice We call ice on Johnny, but he'd fucking put him in his fucking boot camp and shit, man. My dad's wife is a fucking liar. The things they would see.

Speaker: Exactly, right? New recruits, man. Hold on a second. Brittany, did you want to call ice on your dad's wife? Yes. oh Oh my God, seriously? Hey, Brittany, please see if you don't.

Speaker: Right? I agree. Well, she hasn't got married to him, so she's legal, but her nephew isn't. No, there's a six-month period in there. I don't know how long they've been married. Oh, been married, but no, her nephew isn't. Let's see if you don't.

Speaker: Brittany's traveling down the fucking family tree and shit, man. Her fucking nephew I fucking family, you fuck. Cheers, Johnny. He's cute. He's a nice guy, but...

Speaker: Fuck you, Haas. If I had the chance to do it to that. Hey, Glick, cheers. Cheers, Moe Dolls. Cheers. Cheers. Cheers.

Speaker: Fuck Haas. Goddamn, Brittany, you've had the same amount of vodka for four hours What the fuck, man? I know what's wrong with me. What are you drinking, Haas? What that, bong water? drink bong water one night by accident. That was nasty. So I used to smoke tobacco bong, right? Like lot consecutively. drink the water from that.

Speaker: i drink by long water one night by an accident that was nasty i and earlier you talk about the last jason it like not good so i used to smoke tobacco out of my blog right like a lot consecutively and i drink the water from that I had a nicotine buzz for the next six fucking hours fucking revving up my fucking head, dude.

Speaker: Dude, I was in a fucking Marines down in the Philippines. and us so We did that shit for fun. No, no, no, no, no. I got so fucking drunk in a bar one night. there was just Ironically, the it was from Texas. His nickname was Tex, right? but like original, right? But this motherfucker had been like, you know, he had dip in his mouth and had been spitting in this bottle for like three fucking hours, man. ah So the bottle was like three quarters to like even more full. I grabbed it thinking it was my beer because it felt fucking heavy. Dude, I took a big old swig of that shit, man. I have fucking swallowed it oh like Oh my fucking God. like Oh my fucking God.

Speaker: Oh, dreambo got it oh green mo yeah It was. I do. Of course I do. In high school ah where I did color guard.

Speaker: they pulllar issues Color guard? you You protect the people from the colors? sure yeah bunch of Bunch of Jamals up in that motherfucker.

Speaker: She said, I'm a part of the colored guard. No colors shall pass. Stop.

Speaker: No purple crayons up in this bitch, all right? No purple crayons. I'm right That's on me. That's on me, and I apologize. So fucked up. I feed off top left, all right? That's all I'm saying. What up to the NGS? Where's my NGS? Where is that? I need my guy.

Speaker: Go ahead, Britt. Go ahead. You were part of the color guard. yeah that's That's all I got. That was it.

Speaker: That was it. That was a whole joke. Shut fuck I'm sorry, you said colored guard sick see Actually, I think you did. yeah i think she did, too. Ain't no colors getting past me.

Speaker: It's up to my dad, definitely. i see you colors out there. One of my first dates was in eighth grade with a colored guard. Is it non-final school at the minute? I see a black guy in the National Guard. don't know what I'm saying.

Speaker: No, no, no, no. We, whatever. I don't, I don't know. Force. rows behind us at the movie theaters. Oh, fuck, man.

Speaker: Creepy. Y'all all going to hell. I just hope y'all know that. Who the hell? than likely, if that's the real thing. I'll get there first. I'll save y'all a fucking seat, man. Bitch, I'm driving the short bus.

Speaker: We already know that. Oh, Lord have mercy. You act like driving the morning. I'm sorry. i little sorry man and and We barely hear you,

Speaker: you true the hoss ah a good thing fuck hey something funny I don't like them colored either. I agree with Cliff. What's going on, you bastards? Yeah, there go. This motherfucker with his goddamn fucking ability to do shit. on say With his ability to do shit.

Speaker: How dare you have that ability to introduce you, Haas? How would Cleveland Brown feel about this conversation right now? Oh, that's nasty. I think that he would tell Loretta to go fuck herself.

Speaker: I think, Haas, you're going to be excited about my stand-up. That was not your best Cleveland Brown, Haas. I know you can do better. He's distracted. My going to be Loretta.

Speaker: He tells us he's playing games. He's really watching Pornhub. He's watching. i witness him do it one time He's watching. He's playing Ark Raiders too. Jesus Christ.

Speaker: Yeah, now show us the third monitor. Hey, amputee midget gangbangs. There's one coming up tomorrow in Pennsylvania. A midget gangbang?

Speaker: I've been waiting for four years to see your cock and you're still on panel.

Speaker: came out i it waiting through ive been waiting for four years to see your cock and you're still on panel I know, because you ain't worthy of the old swung. Right, because it's so small. click You know what, bitch? A Tic Tac still hurts at 90 miles an hour. It's facts.

Speaker: It's facts. All I got to say is I got to jump out of a car right about 90, and you know what? It's going to fucking hurt either the way you want to look at it. you yeah I might be the size of a Tic Tac, but I got 300 pounds back in the hand.

Speaker: It might also be the cyst on his fucking testicle. Just saying. At 90 mile an hour, they're all going hurt. Anything's going to hurt at 90 mile an hour at this point. I get yeah i got to go back to Britt. What's happening tomorrow? Did I hit a midget gangbang? What? Yeah. i know yeah fuck glick Back to the midget gangbang.

Speaker: There's a midget wrestling. Have you guys ever watched? me Oh my God. Yes, yes I have. We, I don't want to make the Marines sound bad, but we bought we jesus christ man we brought them in one night in the barracks. It is one of the best nights in the barracks that I've ever fucking had.

Speaker: They're super cheap, too. It was half off. Thank you. I'm so glad you said that. I just want to. Words are hard. Glick and Talk.

Speaker: However, I was going to say something about the Marines and midgets, and going to preface it with I'm a civilian. Okay, I regret that. It has nothing to do with it. You're welcome.

Speaker: i want i want to I want to do midget tossing. Does that make bad human being? because i love No, it is fucking amazing, dude. I've done it. It is fucking amazing. It is the best time you'll. It's the it's a best hundred bucks you can spend, man. I'm telling you. Oh my gosh. Go in a bouncy house with one of them. Oh my god, dude. And and we did bowling and the whole nine yards. It was fucking hilarious, man. i did That is a show that people that pay... Oh, that was fucking amazing.

Speaker: Squatch tossing a midget. No shit. No shit. No shit. are wowing about a little You should roll on across the stage on your fucking roast, man.

Speaker: eagle like that That could be your opening. That could be your opening, dude. any little people that are listening also Also, I've said this, and this is nothing new.

Speaker: I'm looking for a mini-glick. I need a small person that'll throw a beard and that'll drink. That'll drink. Put on my lap on Saturday night. Dude, so you know the you know the little mini-dude on Game of Thrones?

Speaker: Yeah, yeah, yeah. I don't even really watch Game of Thrones. I do. For a little dude, he's got a big old dick, man. I'm not kidding. Shut up. The guy that is...

Speaker: the guy that is He's a waitress or waiter. waiter He looks just like him. and Peter Denglish or whatever his name is. away either way Any little people that may be out there listening, if you would like to be a mini-glick for Saturday nights and be my new best friend.

Speaker: please let me know on social media. If he will let him throw you across the yard, let him know. I mean, I mean um um ah know um i won't throw Miniclick across the yard unless they're down for it However, any other midgets that will allow this Sasquatch to just fucking wing their asses like a lawn dart,

Speaker: Please let me know. Put him in a cannon. No, i know it is me like literally grabbing it. No, midget tossing. Midget tossing is a real thing, man. It's a real fucking thing. yeah I want to throw a little person so bad.

Speaker: So, like in like, up here where I like to practice. cause i got I got kids and i got nieces and nephews. Midget wrestling is just five feet. Shock put. Yeah.

Speaker: yeah Yes. Yes. the hell out of the little person. Dude, I want to see you spin around with a little person in your arms three times and then suck his ass. Shock put that motherfucker. Yeah, exactly. chuckli um I want to see this. Like, if it happens, we'll go to the Olympics. We got two weeks. We got two weeks. We got to find a little person.

Speaker: Oh, my God, dude. and and i won't I won't say anything after I get roasted. Once everybody gets done roasting me, if there's a little person that is listening, that will allow me to launch them across the bar.

Speaker: I'll catch him. but No, throw throw him into a baby pool of fucking Jell-O and shit, dude. Yeah, Jell-O wrestling after after that. whatever writtentney britney Brit versus the midget. yeah The little person, whatever. i would pay yeah I would pay fucking money to see that, man. She'd be wrapping him monkey legs and feet around his ass, like choking him under the fucking Jell-O and shit. Fuck yes, man.

Speaker: That'll make my new... that'll make money that'll That'll be the best beginning of 2026. And you could have... you get you get out there Yeah, you could have Hoss do like a fucking intro. It's like, that's nasty. I can't do his voice, but whatever. i get lots little Oh, that's nasty. Into a Jell-O where then they have all extended nightground fly here is made here on bay one I'm telling you, I don't, you know, i might get some haters from saying this shit, but we all pitched in $100 in the barracks that night. And these motherfuckers made some money because there was probably like 36

Speaker: and we we spent We spent... Oh, there was no midget wrestling. It was all about midget bowling and midget tossing. and we were It was fucking hilarious. And they had a great fucking time. They had a great fucking time doing it. like They made bank and they had a good fucking time because we were all just in there partying and then shit, man. but Oh my God, dude.

Speaker: It is so fucking fun. So fucking fun. Ladies and gentlemen, I hate to say it. i hate to say it. I hate to do it. I hate to say it. Shut the fuck up. Don't say it then.

Speaker: It's Saturday night. We've reached our time limit. shall we Holy shit. You have not. Did we run it back? Yeah. we did but yeah ah but yeah let's like look look the yeah i'm down. part i like Yeah, run rubb it and and back in um almost only a brity's getting topless again How do we how do we how do we tired to get... and see him Tired of seeing Johnny's titties.

Speaker: With that being said, that's how we end the show. Follow us by Nonsensical Network, New Year's Eve, Warren, Ohio, Underground Lounge, Rick, Michael, Robert, Coleman, and Snotty, and then followed by a live Wednesday night Nonsensical Nonsense host, Roast of Glick,

Speaker: Right here on the Nonsense Gold Network. Give us follow. Give us a like. Give us share. Appreciate you guys listening. Appreciate you guys hanging