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Back To School Pep Talk
1.4k Plays2 years ago
Back to school pep talk for parents! 10 things to do to have a successful school year with your child no matter how old they are.
Download my BTS checklist here: https://view.flodesk.com/pages/62e7ec280fcdf4bda69f1821
Back to school books: https://www.amazon.com/shop/bigcityreaders/list/3UGTRRVHOHMSU?ref_=aip_sf_list_spv_ofs_mixed_d
Have some fun: blend peach liquid IV, coconut water, and frozen peaches to make a delicious and hydrating slushie!
https://www.liquid-iv.com/: CODE: missbeth for 20% off
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Transcript
Podcast Apology and Hydration Tips
00:00:00
Speaker
What's up, you guys? It's Ms. Beth. I'm so sorry for the delay for my super fans that tune into every single podcast as it drops. This is the longest it's ever been. It's been two weeks since I've dropped a new episode. I've been sick. Well, first of all, I was busy and then I got sick, which is a little ironic because I think in the last episode, I was talking about how I'm trying to stay more hydrated because I lose my voice all the time and then I got sick and lost my voice.
00:00:29
Speaker
Here we are, back, better than ever. I will tell you, this is, I've been making all of my treats, you know, all of my watery treats, because I don't know, I can't just drink water, I need to make it a treat for myself.
00:00:47
Speaker
I saw this recipe recently that was how to make frozen or peach rosé. And it was like frozen peaches, rosé, ice, all this stuff. And it looked delicious. And I was like, I have to be a hydrated girl. I lose my voice too much to do anything that's dehydrating. So I decided to make this drink without the rosé. I used liquid IV, frozen peaches, ice, and coconut water.
00:01:14
Speaker
And let me tell you, it tastes just like a slushie. So I asked Liquid IV if they would give me a code for my listeners so you guys could make it and also be hydrated, girlies or boys or humans. And you can use the code miss bath for 20% off at Liquid IV. But I've been chugging all of these
00:01:35
Speaker
hydration drinks. Another one I've been making is hydration drinks. It's just fancy water, but I've been doing, I got fun ice cube trays and I've been putting like a little raspberry in each of the squares and doing like a poppy and putting it on ice. I don't know. I just can't, I'm so dehydrated and my voice shows it. And especially when I'm sick, I need to be
00:01:58
Speaker
treating my body better. So those are two of my little treats. I'll keep sharing other things. Oh, another one I like to do is a Topo Chico with, um, with pineapple juice, like just a smidge. It's delicious. Okay. Let me know if you have any other water recipes. I know that sounds really funny, but I'm just not a girl that can just drink water. I need to make it into a treat. So if you missed me,
00:02:24
Speaker
I missed you too.
Back-to-School Pep Talk for Parents
00:02:25
Speaker
I literally was like, all I want to do is record a podcast, but I had absolutely no voice. So anyway, we're back together again and.
00:02:36
Speaker
We're talking back to school. This is a back to school pep talk for parents. I'm gonna have one for your kids and I'm gonna have one for teachers too. But today I want to talk about just some little ways that you can get ready to go back to school. I'm gonna start with a little story that honestly changed my life.
00:02:59
Speaker
and I think healed part of my inner child. So my sister the other day texted me and was like, will you come back to school shopping with me and the kids? And I was like, of course, be right over. And she's pregnant with her fourth baby. And you know, she was like, how could I have done this alone? I was like, well, you would have and it would have been fine. But
00:03:22
Speaker
We were talking about she couldn't decide if she wanted to do like one on one shopping with each of them to make it like a special thing. And then she's like, I just have to do it. Should I be making it special? I was like, actually, this is so special. I heard I heard one time and this is a little bit different than what I planned on sharing. But we don't actually remember the moments. We remember what we said about it. I'm probably totally butchering that.
00:03:48
Speaker
phrase. But it's like what we think about it right after. So if we're like, Oh, that was chaotic. We remember it being chaotic. But if we're like, that was so fun that we got to have smoothies. And we were silly in the checkout line and played I spy because the line was taking so long and, and then somebody had to go to the bathroom and we had to
00:04:07
Speaker
run there and then we couldn't find each other and then we bumped into each other. You remember the things like wasn't that silly instead of like wasn't that so chaotic that we couldn't find each other and then you had to leave in the middle of the checkout line and then we were so bored that we had to think of games and it's just the way you tell yourself to remember it. So that little shift of like that was so fun and silly how we did all of those things together.
00:04:33
Speaker
versus like, that was crazy. Yes, both are true.
Parenting Insights and Shopping
00:04:36
Speaker
But you're going to remember it how you tell yourself to remember it. That's not the part I was going to say the part I was going to say about my sister, like healing a part of me was one of her kids said, like, Oh, I want that. And instead of reacting and saying,
00:04:53
Speaker
be grateful or I just got you something else or this was her turn. She said, there is nothing that I would do for your sister that I would not also do for you. And I literally was like,
00:05:09
Speaker
you are the best mom ever. And she was like, what? You know, obviously, parents, I feel like so many of my mom friends are always so quick to be like, no, that's just no, that didn't mean anything. But when I heard that truly, an inner child part of me was like, wow,
00:05:27
Speaker
That is what you say. That is so beautiful to say to a child. Because that's what they're asking. That's truly what they're asking. They're not asking for the thing. They're asking, do you love me as much? They're asking. I mean, sometimes they are just wanting the thing. But deep down, all of our needs come from that. Do you love me? Do you see me?
00:05:51
Speaker
You do love me as much. Will you be there for me? And it's kind of funny then he didn't even he actually didn't even want the thing after that. But she was like, do you really want this?
00:06:02
Speaker
And he was like, no. And she was able to be like, or do you just want things? It's really exciting to want everything in the store. And we don't need all of the things in the store. It's fun to pick out something. But she really talked with each of her kids and said, let's figure out what the things we're looking for are.
00:06:22
Speaker
You need a cool pair of pants. One of her kids said, I really want fun pants. So that was on her list. One said he wanted some cool sweatshirts. One wanted new shoes. So those were the things we were looking for. So whenever they just pulled out a stuffed animal or whatever they wanted, she said, oh, that's so cool. But what are we actually on the hunt for? And they were like, oh, yeah. So instead of just saying, no, we're not getting that, redirecting them about what we're on the hunt for.
00:06:50
Speaker
We're on the hunt for your cool pants. Let's go look for them together. And it ended up being such a fun time. Of course, it was chaotic. Three kids back to school shopping in a mall.
00:07:02
Speaker
But it was really a great time. So I hope that inspires you and reminds you that it doesn't, not everything needs to be like so each kid, one-on-one, three separate trips. We had a blast and it was so special and meaningful. So take like, give yourself a little break if you're feeling like you need to do everything like someone else is doing it.
00:07:26
Speaker
it doesn't need to look like that and you can just take like tiny moments you know like i took two of the kids and she was able to go try on a fun jumpsuit with her daughter and then it was the switch you know so it's like it doesn't need to be the whole trip one-on-one like that moment of trying on a jumpsuit together was a very special 10 minutes those 10 minutes mean a lot more than
00:07:49
Speaker
than you think. So don't worry about trying to make it such a magical like full day extra special thing. You can make really tiny moments really special for your kids too and set up the stage for a successful school year.
00:08:04
Speaker
Of course, it's so fun to go back to school shopping because you set the stage for having conversations with your kids and you want to say, what do you think the school year will be like? And it is really fun to let them pick out clothes and to start to imagine like, ooh, maybe I'll wear this on a dress down day or maybe I'll wear this on
00:08:24
Speaker
Oh, I picked out a pizza shirt. Maybe I'll wear that on pizza day. I wonder if anyone else will have a pizza shirt. I wonder, I wonder if I'll make a new friend if we both have pizza shirts or I wonder if people will dress differently than me. Like someone else will style it with a skirt and I'll be inspired and I'll style it with pants. And I wonder if it'll turn into me having a pizza party with all the kids in my class. Like those moments of picking out clothes to go back to school, help kids dream about what the school year will be like.
00:08:54
Speaker
It was really special to be a part of it and I was so glad my sister asked me to help.
00:09:00
Speaker
And I was also so happy to witness those moments that, you know, she did a last minute change like, OK, it doesn't need to be all of us or it doesn't need to be one on one. We can all go and it can still be super magical. And also it can still be really fun in the chaos. So I hope that helps whoever needs it. But we didn't even buy a whole lot of things. Everybody picked out, you know, one or two items. And then we went home and we decided to style those items with clothes that were already in the
00:09:29
Speaker
closet. So it was really special. And a good reminder, like we just we could pick out like one or two items and restyle and make outfits. And we did a whole fashion show, everybody tried out all the outfits, we put the outfits
Preparing Kids for School Routines
00:09:44
Speaker
together in the closet.
00:09:45
Speaker
It was a great time. So if you're back to school shopping, Godspeed, I hope that helps. If you haven't started back to school yet, this is the hardest tip I got to tell you. It might be time to start going to bed a little earlier.
00:10:04
Speaker
It is so fun to stay up late in the summer, I know, but maybe pick like two nights a week to start going to bed earlier. It's going to help your kids get ready to go to bed earlier when it's five nights a week in just a couple more weeks.
00:10:21
Speaker
And it's going to make those morning routines go a little bit better. So speaking of morning routine, I'm going to share this in the show notes. I have a printable version of tips to practice to get your kids ready to go to school. But I also have a printable morning routine. You can take mine or you can change it out. But starting a morning routine, first of all, just starting that morning routine.
00:10:45
Speaker
is a great thing. But having a visual representation of what we're going to do in the morning is going to help your kids not feel so out of control. We see meltdowns or kids have a hard time because they don't feel like they're in control, especially toddlers want to be in control. And they usually try to control one thing, food, sleep, or potty.
00:11:08
Speaker
And if we give them some more control, like let them see what their morning routine will be, you know, maybe we start with just three pictures, brush your teeth, eat your breakfast, and then get your backpack on. It doesn't feel like we're just telling them what they need to do.
00:11:29
Speaker
feels like they have a say in it because they can look at the board think about it like if you're at the board or the fridge wherever you have the pictures think about it like if you're at a meeting and somebody gives you the itinerary like you
00:11:42
Speaker
feel good knowing where you're at. Even going to a wedding, you like to see, OK, here's where we're at. OK. Or if you're like me, I'm like, oh, I have to go to the bathroom. How much time do I have? OK. So let them see what their morning will look like before they get out the door. That is going to help them so much. I know it feels so small, but big kids, little kids, all kids benefit from seeing their morning routine. So if you have big kids, you can write it out for them.
00:12:09
Speaker
Here are the things you need to do in the morning. Give them a checklist. It doesn't need to be a whole big thing. You could just write a piece of paper in like a lamination sheet and have them check it off every morning. It's really easy. You can get a laminated piece of slip in from Amazon. It's super easy. So start practicing the morning routine.
00:12:31
Speaker
Let them do those three things, add more to it if they can handle more, but that's going to help a lot. If you can't find the morning routine, just DM me on Instagram at Big City Readers and say morning routine and I'll send you the download I have. Okay. So many people, I know you guys all know this because you listened to the podcast about kindergarten prep and back to school prep, but I'm just going to say it again.
00:12:56
Speaker
Memorizing sight words and practicing anything academic is literally the last thing that you need to do to help your child get ready to go back to school. Literally the last thing. School is for learning. Kindergarten is for learning. We do not need to be worried about academics right now.
00:13:12
Speaker
what your child's teacher wants. And this is actually true. I polled a few thousand teachers and asked what they actually wanted people to know to make sure this wasn't just my opinion. And they want the social emotional stuff practiced. So that means practice opening lunches. I know you don't want to probably pack lunches before you need to.
00:13:36
Speaker
Take a couple of days, pack the lunch, and even if you're having it at home, have your child practice opening their go-gird or their bags or whatever you're putting in their lunch. Doing this is going to help your child feel relaxed when they go to school and confident in a very small way. If they feel confident opening their lunch, we're just building that confidence muscle in their brain. They're going to feel confident doing a lot more academic work too. And also your teacher is going to feel really appreciative that they don't have to just open all of the things for your child.
00:14:08
Speaker
If you have a nervous child, which I was that child, I have a whole book list about books about nerves going back to school and how to work through them. So I'll leave that in the show notes too. But this is something called bibliotherapy.
00:14:30
Speaker
kids often can relate to a character or find language in a book much easier. Well, through a book or through play than we can with just our conversations. So whether that looks like reading a book to them and asking how they if they related to, you know, froggy going back to school, or if you are playing with two, you know, little dolls, and you say like, I feel worried about going to a new classroom, and letting your child interact with that doll, and
00:14:57
Speaker
say really their feelings, but it's easier because it's through the doll. These are two really important ways to help your child express their feelings, how they're feeling about going back to school. Maybe they're not at all nervous. Maybe it's you that is nervous. But you're going to get to see an inside look at how they're feeling when they can relate to either the character they're playing with or the character in the story.
Emotional and Social Preparation for School
00:15:17
Speaker
One of my favorite books is The Kissing Hand. And this trend has become really popular on the internet. But in The Kissing Hand, it's essentially a book where the little raccoon is nervous and there is a kiss that you leave in the hand. And whenever you, your child feels nervous, they can look at their hand.
00:15:37
Speaker
remember that you are with them and so you can do that by drawing a little heart in your child's hand and in your own hand and you can help them remember like when you look at it that means I love you and I'm with you and I can't wait to see you at the end of the day but that's a really good book to read if you're gonna do that trick as well. There's a whole bunch more book lists I'll link in the show notes but I'm just gonna share a couple more routine or back-to-school strategies but remember
00:16:08
Speaker
Most of all, your kids are following your energy, whether you want them to or not. So ask yourself if it's really you that's feeling nervous about them going back to school and what you can do to calm your nerves. Is it that you're feeling like you're going to miss them? You can model that out loud. Talk about that for them.
00:16:29
Speaker
I feel worried. I've been with you every day since you were a baby. And this is the first time you're going to be apart from me. And I feel sad. And your child might even help you problem solve by saying, that's okay. Here's what you can do if you miss me.
00:16:44
Speaker
And when they help you problem solve, they're also going to help themselves figure out what they can do when they miss you. Never underestimate telling your child that you are feeling the same way as them. I had a consultation with a mom the other day who said English was not her first language and she feels like she doesn't know all of the how to say every word in English or how to spell every word.
00:17:09
Speaker
And I told her, and I mean this with my whole heart, you are in a great spot because the best thing you can do for your child is to tell them you don't know everything.
00:17:21
Speaker
If we just teach them that you know everything, you're always calm. You're always, you know, you're never nervous. You always know how to spell everything. They just grow up thinking that we know how to do everything and they feel timid about that. But if you can show them that you also are learning new things and you can model, this is tricky for me. Let me remember how to do this. Let me remember how to stretch out this word. Let me remember how to listen for the sounds.
00:17:44
Speaker
Let me remember how to use my brave brain talk when I'm nervous and tell myself how to get through this. Let me remember how to practice my belly breaths. If they see you working on that, that's going to help them start to do that too when they are nervous or when they don't know how to do something.
00:18:02
Speaker
So don't be afraid of that. But definitely check your own emotions. Is it you that's nervous, that's putting it on them? A lot of times if we say, like, Are you nervous about going back to school? You know, we're asking a bit of a leading question to kids and they think they want to please the adults. So they're gonna, they might say, Yeah, I am because, you know, we said it. So we might be, that might be the right answer.
00:18:26
Speaker
So maybe just saying modeling things for them, like saying, you know, I went to dinner with some friends the other night, and there was new people in the friend group that I hadn't met before. And for a minute, I felt like my stomach was like, had bubbles in it. And I think I was feeling worried. I think I was feeling worried because I
00:18:47
Speaker
I haven't met new friends in a while and I actually didn't I don't know this restaurant that we were going to and I was worried I wasn't gonna know where to sit or if I was gonna look silly or or if I wouldn't know how to read the things that are in the menu or I just felt kind of nervous but then I remembered actually.
00:19:07
Speaker
probably a lot of people going here are feeling that way too. And I have a good friend that was going to be at the table. My friend Susan was there and I told Susan, I'm feeling kind of nervous. So we decided to come up with a little wink. So I would tell her if I needed
00:19:23
Speaker
some more help if I needed a friend to take a break from the table with me. Or we decided that if I winked at her that meant she knew I was on her side and she was on my side and it was okay to feel nervous. And we were trying new things together.
00:19:43
Speaker
So those are just a couple of things you can do to help your child get in the mindset of problem solving their own feelings and not being afraid of their feelings. So just model what happens to you out loud because kids are learning how to think, how to feel, how to be by every interaction that we have. We just don't always say it out loud. So start saying them out loud. It'll help your kids a whole lot.
00:20:09
Speaker
Okay, this is one of my favorites. Grab a treat, go to Starbucks, drive through, get a coffee, get a cake pop, and drive to your school or walk to your school. Even if your school's not open, just have the cake pop out in front. You don't even have to talk about school. Bonus points if you do, but we're just associating that in our brain. We're firing those neurons of fun, treat, and school together. So they're wiring together, and we start thinking school is a treat.
00:20:39
Speaker
It's super fun if you can play on the playground with that treat. We're just going to start practicing, you know, going to school. Maybe do it at the same time that you might be driving to school. Do it one or two weeks out. Do it as often as you can. You don't have to do a cake pop every time, but start driving past the school. Wave high school.
00:21:01
Speaker
and just start talking about like, oh, there's a school. Oh, I saw a light on. I wonder if your teacher's getting your desks ready. Oh, my gosh. I wonder if you'll sit close to the door or close to the window. Just think about narrating thoughts for them to have and neutralizing any fear they might have about things just by talking about it.
00:21:23
Speaker
Another thing you can do is start having lunch at the same time that they're going to have lunch at school. This is going to help them get ready for that routine. Or if you know the schedule, taking bathroom breaks when they get bathroom breaks. And speaking of bathroom, the most important thing you can do is have your child feel confident going to the bathroom by themselves. Zip and button their clothes independently. Wash their hands independently.
00:21:52
Speaker
This is going to go a long way. And talk about making friends. I know we talked about this a minute ago with going to dinner and modeling how it was kind of tricky to make new friends. But you can role play. Like role play, you are the teacher or they're the teacher and have little scenarios. Like maybe say like, I'm Mrs. Smith.
00:22:14
Speaker
nice to meet you and have them practice walking into school. You can do it with your own front door. Get as dramatic as you want. You know, if you want to have them get their outfit on, have a bell ring on your phone and open the front door and say, Oh, good morning. I'm Mrs. Smith. Come on in. Or if you just want to
00:22:36
Speaker
have them pretend to be the teacher and you pretend to be a student walking in and have have the roles reversed. This is really going to help build problem solving skills for your child and their confidence too.
Collaborative Approach Between Parents and Teachers
00:22:51
Speaker
So I hope these strategies help. Remember, everyone is on the same page. Everyone's feeling a little bit nervous and excited, but school is for learning, and the best thing that you can do is remind your child that you and their teacher are a team. Everyone that works at the school is a team, and they're so excited to meet your child. Remember that when you have any questions or concerns, talking with your teacher as well, that that teacher
00:23:19
Speaker
is on your side. Both of you care about your child and every child so much. Remember that when you have questions or if you want to bring up something that you work together, and sometimes it helps to even say that in a meeting. Hey, I know that we both care about our, my kids, your kids in the class so much.
00:23:40
Speaker
And I appreciate that. And I also heard a podcast about this, and I'm wondering if you could share your pain. Or I read an article about this, and I kind of felt nervous. I wondered if you read this article too. That's going to go a long way rather than coming in, you know, bulldozing the situation and saying,
00:24:00
Speaker
I don't think you're doing this the right way. No one feels that. Force is always met with resistance. So remember to remind yourself and your child and your child's teacher that everyone is on the same team and everyone's feeling the same way.
00:24:17
Speaker
And it's okay to tell a grown up if you're feeling nervous. It's okay to tell your child that you're going to miss them too. You can remind them they're going to go to math and reading and art and then have lunch and then maybe read a story and then you're going to pick them up.
00:24:34
Speaker
you could talk about what you're going to do when you pick them up and help them get excited about that or you give them a task like, hey, when I pick you up, I need to know who was wearing green today or who was funny or what made you smile or what made you miss me the most.
00:24:54
Speaker
So we're just helping them be present and mindful in all of the moments in their school day and reminding them that we will meet up again and we will see each other at the end of the school day and it will be so special. And school is for learning and I can't wait to see you. You could tell them what you're going to do while they're at school too.
00:25:17
Speaker
And if they have any more fears or questions, my favorite thing to do is to take a bunch of Post-its and a jar and have them write down everything they're feeling and you do it too. And so you can put them all in together, pull them out and read them to each other and talk
Final Encouragement and Contact Info
00:25:35
Speaker
about it. So it's, you know, you might write, I'm feeling like I might miss you too much. And they might pull that out and read it and they can comfort you through that and say, okay, you know what?
00:25:45
Speaker
I was feeling this too, but you're going to have so much fun because you're going to get to do X, Y, Z while they're at school. And so it's just a fun little activity I like to do to make kids, to kind of equalize the parent and child role and help kids feel more empowered and confident that they have a lot of solutions inside of them already.
00:26:08
Speaker
They know who they are. They know whose they are. You've already done the foundation. You've laid the foundation. You've done the groundwork. They know they are loved. They know they are safe. Squeeze them tight. Enjoy the summer. Make sure your own emotions are in check. Set them up for success with realistic routines and start helping them get excited to go to school this year.
00:26:34
Speaker
It's going to be such a great year. And if you ever need me, I have got your back. So send me a message on Instagram or send me an email. Hello at bigcityreaders.com. And I will talk to you next week. Have an awesome start to the school year.