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Our Thoughts Behind the Anti-Aging Industry
25 Plays4 months ago
We all probably have thoughts about the beauty industry in North America, and the effects its had on women over the years. This topic could be unpacked in many episodes, but today, we tackled the anti-aging industry specifically, and shared our (maybe hot) takes on skincare, plastic surgery, and specialty beauty treatments. We think there's many ways the anti-aging industry preys on women of all ages, and perpetuates insecurities around aging. Curious for where we landed on the topic? Then you won't want to miss this episode!
Continue the conversation with us over at @artofintentionpodcast on instagram, or by email at [email protected]
See you next week!
Xo - Beth and Ayla
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Transcript
Critique of the Anti-Aging Industry
00:00:01
Speaker
I don't know if you've ever heard this, but the anti-aging industry isn't here to help you. It's actually there to scare you so that they can make money. If you're overwhelmed at attempting to look young or prevent wrinkles or still look younger as you get older, then you may be doing yourself more harm than good. Ayla and I want to share some truth bombs and also some encouragement and wisdom today that's been passed on to us about this topic because we think it's a really heavy topic affecting all the women in our society right now.
Introduction to 'The Art of Intention' Podcast
00:00:33
Speaker
Welcome to the Art of Intention podcast with Beth and Ayla. Two best friends turn creative entrepreneurs. This is a place for us to discuss everything, business, friendships, and faith, and occasionally more. We're so excited for today's episode. We think you're going to love it. Stay tuned.
Deceptive Tactics in Beauty and Aging
00:00:52
Speaker
All right, so yeah, the best way we found to break this down, like Beth said, it's just kind of truth bomb, vent, inspiration all into one. But yeah, we just wanted to talk about the anti-aging industry, especially towards women in America, what we find wrong with it. And we just hope you know that you're beautiful. So here's the points that we're going to break down. We're going to kind of just kick it off with some of the lies that the beauty industry sells and how They're pretty much just preying on women's insecurities and they market themselves like they're there to help you, but they're not, like Beth said. um So that's kind of first. And then next, Beth's going to take us down the road of what we should focus on instead of just a cream to take away our wrinkles or surgery to take away this. What can we focus on instead? Health, happiness, hygiene, things like that.
00:01:41
Speaker
And then we just want to leave you guys with our best inspiration, just our best motivation. um Just a few like quotes, a few stories that we've heard been passed down just to encourage you that you don't need to worry about all that stuff. You don't need to add a billion other things into your routine to try to stay younger for another year or something like that. Just to encourage you that
00:02:04
Speaker
I just thought of Veggie Tales when it's like God made you special and he loves you very much. That's literally what came through my mouth. The way you just pause and then I saw your brain. And let that marinate.
00:02:19
Speaker
I saw your brain, just something entered it. One of those intrusive thoughts just entered it. It was definitely intrusive, but it's out there now. You are made worthy and loved. You're beautiful. You're special, no matter what the anti-aginging industry says. So we're going to move on from Veggie Tales.
Consumerism and Beauty Treatments
00:02:37
Speaker
All right. Uh, okay. Let's kick it off. Um, Beth, feel free to jump in wherever you see fit, but I just kind of want to talk about, like we said, like lies that are sold in the industry. And basically my main thoughts for this episode was consumerism and the beauty industry in general spends its time preying on women's insecurities. ah Something I noticed a lot, I was actually talking to Chris about this the other day. And I think a lot of women can relate when you go to not even specifically anti-aging, but when you go to special treatments like
00:03:08
Speaker
getting facials and some of the crazy facials that are available today like the contouring facials and Gua Sha and like extreme like hair massages that are supposed to help your hair thinning and and getting your nails done in a certain way. I'm calling some of the people who perform those procedures out that they are looking to tell women they need treatments that they don't Like, I've seen it in like, lots of vlogs about these special treatments like facials, scalp massages, things like that where women will say like, Oh, well, I'm pretty happy with my hair and the the beautician and whoever's doing it is like, Oh, well, here's this isn't this problem. And I think a lot of women can experience when they go to do something nice, like a haircut or something.
00:03:48
Speaker
being told, well, oh, it would look better with this darker color. Or, oh, you'd look better with this. Or I notice I can't see your eyelashes. Do you want those tinted too? And you think that there you think but it's like, oh, thank you. I didn't notice that. I'm so happy. I'm going to leave here looking prettier. But they're just selling. They're selling. And selling, selling. And it's a disgusting way of doing it. like I don't like it at all. That's such a good point. And yet you may think in the moment, I love what you said. Oh, I'm going to leave here like happier. No, you're going to leave there with now a new list of two more insecurities that you have to worry about. And now in six months, you got to go back and make sure you get it tinted again. You got to, you know yeah you know, I out for it now. Now every time you look in the mirror, you're going to notice it more like you're not leaving with more confidence on from a temporary treatment. Okay. Like rare occasion you might be, you know, if there's, the you know, but we'll get into that. but And it's so unfortunate to me that a lot of people in those positions, and I'm not calling out every single esthetician or things like that, but a lot of people in those positions are other women. It's just really strange for me to
00:04:44
Speaker
like live in this world where you sit there and tell another woman that her hair needs to be darker or she needs to get this kind of acne removed or whatever. um Anyway. Yeah, no, I think that that's one of the reasons for us doing this episode is to kind of bring to light to the women who haven't heard what it's like to lift other women up
Fostering Real Confidence vs. Temporary Solutions
00:05:01
Speaker
genuinely. And maybe you are one of the women who you know is the one who kind of maybe is likely to point out another woman's potential insecurities and tell her she needs to fix something. Not that we're trying to shame you, but we do think, you know, there's another way to go about this and you're not selling genuine confidence. Um, yeah trying to teach someone to temporarily hide something that honestly, they probably didn't even see as a flaw in the first place if you didn't point it out. Um, so we want to teach you how to maybe really instill real confidence. Sorry for interrupting. Go ahead.
00:05:28
Speaker
No, I love that. that was a You worded that. like That's what I was trying to say, so that's perfect.
Perceptions of Modern Beauty Standards
00:05:33
Speaker
And it makes me wonder when you say that, like I wonder what some of our ancestors would think about like women dyeing their gray hair. you know like A hundred, maybe now more years ago, if you told your ancestors, like oh yeah, my hair's gray and I need to cover it, they'd be like, huh? Cause that happens. That's just what happened. They just, you know, just grew up, you aged and it just happened. But yeah, something else I don't like. And I've just noticed this kind of, as long as I can remember, as long as I've been aware of things like beauty and makeup and stuff like that was like,
00:06:02
Speaker
those commercials for creams and anti-wrinkle creams and eye creams that are said to reverse aging or pause aging, things like that. I um i swear I have memories of 10 years old being like, no, like a cream is not going to stop you from getting old, like sort of on skincare. um Not regimen. A good skincare like routine can prolong some things. It can, prolong you know, um stop sun damage, help prevent sun spots, things like that. But it's always been just really gross to me that people can promise this cream in a cup is going to keep you looking young for 10 years longer.
00:06:39
Speaker
Because that's just not true. If you don't take any other measures like plastic surgery to prevent aging, your body, no matter what your skincare is, is still going to age at the time that it's proper. It's just so weird to me to set up this like reverse aging, pause aging when
Acceptance of Natural Aging
00:06:53
Speaker
it's inevitable. No matter what you do, you are going to age. So why are we freaking out about it? like I kind of made a promise to myself that When I got a little bit older, I wasn't going to be somebody who freaked out about it. Like I wasn't going to be somebody who lied about my age or who freaked out over gray hairs. Fun fact, Beth, I don't know if you know this, but I have like a few right now. Like I have a big old tuft of gray hairs like right here. And my initial reaction was to joke and be like, oh my gosh, death is approaching me. But I was just like, I don't want to be that way. Like I don't want my inevitable growing up.
00:07:27
Speaker
haunt me my entire life because if I'm 26 and I've had gray hairs for like a couple years now do I really want to spend the last three quarters of my life being like I'm so old like no like I've just never liked that attitude and I can't promise I'm always perfect twenty turning 25 was a little weird for me it was a little much but and you're allowed to acknowledge like well life's moving fast I need to make the most of it but I just never wanted to have that attitude too that me being old was a bad thing or problem for other people or something like that because it's not, it's literally going to happen to everybody else. No one's safe and not in a way that's scary. It actually shouldn't scare you. Like you can't stop it. So just kind of yeah let it go. No, exactly. And I think that's kind of one of the points of our um episode today is yeah, you can't stop it, but you shouldn't be afraid of it. And here, here's why. Let me, let's teach you what it actually is. What is actually aging as is a couple of spring chickens talking to you about this over here. I know, I know. So there's probably going to be some older people who are like, you guys be quiet. Well, is's i yeah well but listen, the truth is that the wisdom that we've gotten that has inspired us about this, there's been
Unrealistic Beauty Standards and Photoshop
00:08:31
Speaker
two things. So one, we've gotten irritated and and our heart goes out to people based on the things we're actively seeing on social media. And the second half that inspired this episode was the wisdom that we've been blessed with by older women to change our mindset about this. Okay. yeah But anyway, so I wanted to say kind of going up something you were saying. What you were saying about like a simple cream or whatever you know isn't going to fix you. um Just a couple of reminders about how this anti-aging industry is lying to you. Hopefully by now, everybody knows that every single person you see in an ad, every person you see in a magazine, that is all photoshopped. I know many, many models. I work in this industry. like When I tell you that every single thing is photoshopped and Photoshop doesn't always mean making someone skinnier or changing the shape of their face, all of that is
00:09:12
Speaker
It's all done. It's also removing any skin texture while still making it look natural. It's changing eye color. It's changing skin tone. It's changing wrinkle. It is changing everything. And when I tell you every single thing you see, every single thing you see is Photoshopped and edited in some way. So there's just, if you didn't already know that, ah take it as someone who literally works in this field. Like I promise you, and every model I come across has been Photoshopped in some way. Like it's just a fact. So when you are looking at an advertisement, even a video, did you know they can even change skin tone videoity they or change skin texture in video? They can take out your acne in video, they can do everything in video. yeah Even if it's a video and someone looks so perfect and their skin's glowy and everything and they're like flawless, like first of all, it's edited. But going off that, that wasn't actually my main point.
00:09:56
Speaker
Um, like Ayla was saying, like, yeah, ah one cream can't make you like 10 years younger without some kind of surgery. Also remember that these people that we see in society who do, they are maybe like in their sixties or seventies and they look like they're in their thirties and forties. I was like, what the heck? Those are all. celebrity millionaires who will make enough money to be able to afford treatments that you will not be able to afford. I'm sorry to say that with experts that they pay millions of dollars to tell them things that you will never know or
00:10:28
Speaker
or the other option, the only other option is it's in their genes. And if you don't have the genes to just somehow magically look like you're 30 when you're 70, you don't have that unless you have millions of dollars to try, not even guaranteed, but to try to look a fake age that you're not. Then you are just setting yourself up for so much heartache and failure. And that's why we're talking about this.
Influence of Hollywood on Beauty Norms
00:10:52
Speaker
Okay. Yes. it love agree so Oh, um snaps all the way over here. Thank you so much for saying that. I can't believe I didn't include But you made such a good point. like I think a huge reason that this has been pushed on a lot of the women around us, any general woman you talk to now might be struggling with this, is Hollywood and celebrities. yeah and And unfortunately, again, not every celebrity, some are very open about the work they have done, but a lot aren't. And they'll sit there and claim that, oh, I just do this cream, or I just go to the gym, or I just do this thing, and I, whatever.
00:11:26
Speaker
and they've gotten facelifts, they've gotten eyelid lifts, they've gotten tummy tucks, chin implants, all the things. Yeah, the cheekbone ones. they yeah like And even if they are open about their plastic, still when you see Jennifer Lopez and whoever she's married to now on the red carpet, you're going to be like, gosh, she looks great. And it actually makes me physically ill when there's someone who's older who I know has had work done and maybe their work looks bad because they're older now. But and people say like, oh man, don't they look great? She's aging beautifully. I'm like, no, she's not. It's not real. Like it's one thing to have somebody like Betty White, who was just, you know, an angel.
00:12:04
Speaker
I don't know if she ever had work done but you know she looked like an old lady before she passed away and to see someone like her ah exactly I thought she was stunning she was so loved in so many things like to see that and then to see somebody her same age yet who looks 20 years younger and for people to be like gosh she looks great I'm like no that's not real like I don't care that she looks great she didn't do anything she got things done like it actually bugs me so much when someone clearly has had work done and I and not for the person complimenting them. It's just for the lie that's being sold that they're not going to look like that when they're or like, how can I look like that? Like I'm her same age and I'm already saggy here and I'm already this here. And even if it's not directly plastic, like you said, Beth, it's all these other resources that they have and
00:12:48
Speaker
They have to look like that for the camera like Hollywood's totally sold this illusion that they have to look that way I'm sure lots of those people of fame had never come to them wouldn't even think about having to look a certain way and stuff So why are we taking Hollywood standards and putting that on ourselves when we you know? We don't that have to look like that. No one expects that of us. No, that's such a good point.
Societal Pressure and Self-Esteem
00:13:08
Speaker
Oh my gosh, exactly. And I love what you said about how like it bothers like not the person commenting on them bothers you, but the fact that they are getting that work done um and how that influences people who are watching, knowing that the young women who are watching, even the middle aged women who are watching, it's going to affect their mind, even if they don't directly think a direct thought of like, oh my gosh,
00:13:29
Speaker
my chin needs to look like that or oh my gosh my skin needs to look like that it is affecting overall the reason behind some of the future choices they're going to make but actually go ahead and let's finish up this section um talking about the lies of anti-aging and then all transitions into the next section because i have a one last thought about this that sounds good yeah the only other things i really had in this category they're super quick and not even well i did have selling plastic surgery we kind of covered that i don't like it have never liked it i don't think you're a bad person if you've gotten it i just think it's quite unnatural and it's just sad that it's around um anyway and then beth i don't know if you've seen it's another area of consumerism but have you seen they're even coming out with like
00:14:10
Speaker
How do I explain this? Like ergonomic things to help your face not wrinkle, like anti-wrinkle straws. Have you heard of that? It's like, it's a plastic straw and it's it's hard to describe, but it's got like, you know how you, you know how you like purse your lips to drink out of the straw. This makes it wide mouth. So your mouth just like sits on the straw. And you would be like my anti-wrinkle straw. And I'm like, that's disgusting. Imagine not being able to drink water because you're worried about your mouth wrinkles. And I just, it's always so sad when I, cause I have heard real women in my life, both my age, actually teenagers and older, like I heard an array of women in my life say this when they laugh or smile, say like, ooh, gotta watch the smile lines or, o or like, if you're, if you're angry, they're like, that'll give you crow's feet or like, gotta watch those wrinkles. Like not being able to emote because of wrinkles. Isn't that whole wild?
00:15:03
Speaker
like I the way I couldn't give to flying f-bombs about if my laugh gives me wrinkles 30 years from now like that I worry about aging as far as like the the end of my life approaching sometimes but like I couldn't imagine saying like oh like watch watch that smile watch those smile lines or watch those crows feet like you're trying to so that was like really my last point with that that I don't have like a point to make, I just don't like yeah that that exists and that that's around. but No, that's good. That's what's making you like fired up about this. And that right there, I think the second point you made is one of the things I'm also more passionate about with this concept as well. And it's one of the things that
00:15:45
Speaker
does bother me more than normal when I hear that the people specifically stopping themselves from having fun or from having like you said emoting because they're worried about something like wrinkles and we laugh but also it's not that funny like you said I'm maybe laughing but you're not really laughing yeah the real action to it yeah Yeah, it it is hilarious. And as someone who I wonder if this ever happened to you, but as someone who has had a couple of comments made it just throughout my life, and I'm too i'm too young to be hearing this. like I don't need people to be saying this around me, but people saying either around me or to me to watch the the like the frown lines or something like that. And it's like, again, something that fellow women, you guys, what we're saying is going to affect the other women around us. And even maybe even sometimes the young men when it comes to something like wrinkles, who knows?
00:16:33
Speaker
But like the young women specifically, what you say to them and around them is going to affect their confidence. It's going to affect therefore the decisions they make, therefore the products they buy, therefore how they feel about themselves, therefore how they feel about everything. like It's such a spiraling
Generational Views on Beauty and Aging
00:16:48
Speaker
thing. and Yes, and it's so passed down. like if you see If you see your mom in the mirror and going, oh, my wrinkles, my wrinkles, you're going to grow up. And then when your first wrinkles show up, that equals bad. You've heard this is bad, so when mine show up, this equals bad. And and again, it just doesn't make sense to me because even with your plastic, it's gonna happen to everybody. So I don't know when it became well a bad thing.
Counteracting the Beauty Industry's Influence
00:17:11
Speaker
No, I guess I don't really know either, but I'm thinking that like, I was thinking as you were talking, um Hollywood, like you said before me, it's a really really big difference in this and everything just becoming Photoshopped just automatically now. yeah It's like everything is so gonna be automatically telling women that they're not good enough, that you,
00:17:29
Speaker
everyone listening need to be careful and conscious of how to build others around you up because there's enough tearing you down. yeah So that's kind of like just be aware that what the beauty industry is doing, they're praying. I love how Ayla said it. They're praying on our insecurities. is And so we have to actively be conscious and aware of that so that we can make sure that the words that come out of our mouths and the thoughts that we're thinking are countering that because everything else, everything we see on a screen, everything we see in an ad, everything we hear on social media is going to be doing the opposite. So it's okay. Yes. I do want to, amazing. I do. Okay. I want to address one. Sorry, it's so funny. Ayla doing her hand movements. I'm being distracting. Sorry. No, he's going to be encouraging. Very encouraging. Okay. I do want to say one thing because the only like caveat, I guess I'd say, I don't know if feel that's even the right word for this that I have with this, um, is
00:18:24
Speaker
I don't know. I guess I have an empathy for let's say you have a really big insecurity about your nose or something and you get a nose job. I know a couple of people who have gotten a nose job. and ah like Personally, I believe that everyone is beautiful and that probably what you consider an insecurity other people don't see as ugly. um You're going to feel it made by yourself. however If you have something that you want to fix like that and you fix it and it works out great, fine, awesome. But there's a difference between fixing something because society told you to or because you feel like you need to look like a certain way and you know that that's going to carry it over, like that's your mindset as a whole versus it being very specific towards one thing, one instant. that you're like, you know what, I'm just going to, I'm just going to fix this. I'm just going to take it off the table. It's for me. Um, you know, it's awesome to be something else next. Um, right and I'm not going to be unrealistic about the outcome. I know that my value isn't in just this one thing. So there is that I, I, I'm like, I'm okay with that. Like, I don't know. I know it's a weird balance and I think it's a yeah i do scenario, but yeah, I think there is a middle ground to be found there. I think like the key is like,
00:19:33
Speaker
not opening you up to more and more. yes you know And again, you know at the end of the day, everyone does have like the right to do what they want with their body. But i totally I totally get what you're saying, especially with something like the nose sometimes for health reasons. But like sure even if it is just kind of like this one thing for me to take care of, and that becomes it, I guess I suppose I wouldn't really have the biggest problem with that. I think it's just like if someone gains that control of fixing something, then what if they're like, ooh, now I can fix this. Now I can fix this. And I think it's a slippery slope. but I do believe in people and their critical thought enough to maybe have the power to fix one thing and be done. like Exactly. Yeah. I see what you're saying. Yeah. yeah and ah And of course, Ayla and I today are focusing on anti-aging. Again, if you're trying to do it to look younger and vanity, like there's different, well, and I guess trying to fix something because you think it looks better is vanity too. but But again, are you trying to do it to look younger? Because that's a like Ayla said, that's a losing battle. If you are getting a nose job to try to look younger,
00:20:28
Speaker
or implants to try to look younger or something that's a losing battle versus let's say you're 25 years old and you want to your nose to look a little different whether for health reasons or because you know what you just it's the one thing you just you know what you want to fix it that's fine it's in a single thing that's different okay All right, so that transition us transitions us a little bit into what we think you should maybe be focusing on instead. So if you're not supposed to be focusing on the fear of getting old or getting older, you know, you're like, oh, well, shouldn't we be worried about getting older? Okay, here's what you should do instead, in our opinion.
Focus on Health and Happiness Over Aging Fears
00:21:01
Speaker
Okay, so ah first of all, something I believe, this is a small side note, is that you're going to give yourself more stress and more health problems if you are constantly worried about like keeping up with the Joneses and the celebrities and all that and what you see um versus if you just focus on like your happiness or something else. So I think there's a difference between self-care and hygiene versus the vanity that comes with the anti-aging industry. And that's really the big distinction here. So tell me so. All right. So here we go. What we think you should focus on instead of fear of aging slash vanity is healthcare. care So we've got some basics, you know, basic hygiene, right? It's good to have a skincare routine. It's good, right? But if you have a,
00:21:44
Speaker
Yeah, if you have a 20 step skincare routine and you're constantly stressed and you see a new beauty trend online, you got to try it desperately. You know, there's just that difference of desperation versus like you want to have a clean face. Sure. You want to make sure you're hygienic. All of that is good. Daily skincare routine, all of that stuff. Hygiene is good. Okay. And there's also self care. If you really love your hair and you want to like have your hair go longer because it's just like, I don't know, it's just fun. um My older sister has like the most beautiful long Rapunzel hair. And I'm just like, Oh my gosh. like if she If she's doing something to have it that way, I love it. like That's awesome. Go for it. Keep doing it, girl. like You do you. Also, just again, something that relaxes you you know um but if you. At the point that it turns to, you're doing it out of fear or doing it out of a vanity. like You have to look younger. You have to prevent your wrinkles. um Be careful because I just will say it once again. It's a losing battle.
00:22:37
Speaker
And you are just compounding your insecurities. So when you're focusing on something that you need to do, you're also going to be focusing on your insecurities. You're never really going to love yourself and you're never really going to be happy because it's a losing battle. um So instead, focus on what makes you healthy. Focus on hygiene. Focus on what makes you happy. And um focus on trying to find ways to be confident in what you are. Know that everybody has ah insecurities. I'm getting a little bit into the encouragement part, so I'll step away from that. um but yeah they all Yeah, I'll bounce off of that a little bit. I love that you distinguished that by the way, that we're not saying to not take care of yourself. Okay. And also just encouragement. like If you love your Friday night like face masks and bubble bath, if you like going and getting your facial or you like going and getting your hair done because you get like a head massage and your hair cut, all of that is fine. like I'm not saying to not...
00:23:27
Speaker
yeah yeah You don't have to just like wear a burlap sack and have your hair in a messy bun all the time. like Definitely, that's not what we're saying. you know and you know The more you older you grow and everything, if you still like doing all of those things, that's great. yeah I don't want it to sound like you can't just put any effort into yourself or anything like that, but I like what you clarified, Beth, about like is it out of vanity or is it out of fear of not looking your best or yeah not looking to you or whatever. you know um Definitely still great to have all of the the things you do that are fun. so and Makeup and stuff is like a different talk about that, but I don't really have too much of an issue with that. This is more specific to fear of anti-aging. I just wanted to bounce off that and say like definitely still do pamper yourself, do the things that are fun. like We're not saying you can't have that. I think that was an important like distinction yeah to make.
00:24:19
Speaker
Well, I like how you said that. Exactly. I like though, especially like calling out like those, you know, like Friday night face masks, all that kind of stuff. yeah And just kind of ask yourself the question, are you doing it, whether it's the cream you want to buy, whether it's a routine, whether it's a facial or a massage or whatever and exercise you want to do or product you want to buy. um Ask yourself, are you doing it because you want to be the best healthiest current version of yourself or are you doing it to try to create a different fake version of you yeah um out of a face, out of a fear? So that's a good way to just yeah answer that for yourself.
00:24:51
Speaker
And with that, a few other things as far as self care, like other things that can help you age gracefully. We always come back to it on this podcast, but exercise and diet.
Exercise and Diet for Graceful Aging
00:25:00
Speaker
yeah Like, like Beth said, I worry and not worry. We don't want you to just worry about things, but I focus more on what you're putting in your body, the green foods, the nutrients, the proteins, the things that you're actually putting into your body for your body to be the best version of itself. If you're worried about having a young body when you're older or All these things, get outside, get on hikes, go run, get into the gym, work your muscles, pick up heavy things, you know like stay active, do things like that, put good foods into your body. i Beth and I were talking about this on our like recap episode when she got to be here with me in Canada. There's this lady at the gym one day who had to be, I don't know what you think, like late 60s maybe?
00:25:40
Speaker
Oh my gosh, I don't know. She was a fox and she was so fit. I was embarrassed to be next to her and she was just like, she was so fit and she was on the Stairmaster forever. We were on there for like seven minutes and she was just like going to town on it. That to me, I guess this can transition us into like our motivational thing because that to me is amazing. That is my goal. That is who I'm aspiring to be. She had her gray hairs. could I could tell she was most likely, you know, late-ish 60s and not in a bad way at all. It was just like the coolest thing I've seen. And I was like, I would rather go that direction.
00:26:18
Speaker
of like I'm aging, but I've also taken care of my body. i've also I've used my body in the way it's supposed to be used. And she she can sit there and say, I still look great at 60 because she she worked hard. She treated her body well and things like that. And i you know I don't know this lady, I'm sure it wasn't out of, I still need to look good when I'm 60. I still want to be healthy when I'm 60. You know, exactly. Well, yeah, I know it wasn't probably out of vanity. Well, I don't know because you're right. We don't know her. But guess what? She had gray hair. She had wrinkles. She was stunning. Beautiful. She was like she said stunning. And yes, no part of me was like, gosh, she'd be so pretty if she dyed her hair or she'd be so pretty if she had Botox. Literally was one of the most beautiful women. And you could just tell, you could tell like healthiness also is so equivalent to happiness. I think in a lot of ways and you can see that in people. Like I feel like if I talked to her, she probably would have like a youthfulness in her voice and like just a happiness in her eyes when she talks. Like anyway, so that was very impressive. And I do think that transition is so great into the next session. So Ayla, why don't you ah start with like, if you have like kind of your um encouragement and like, if you want to. Sure. I'll cut i'll like fire off with a few things and then just, yeah, feel free to, to jump in. First off, I just like,
00:27:33
Speaker
This was all reminding me. I wanted to say I did see actually what inspired me to do this episode. It was actually months ago, but I saw a TikTok and it was this girl and she was like, I forget exactly how she phrased it, but she was like doing all of the things that the anti-aging industry tells me not to do because the anti-aging industry is disgusting. And then she sat there and like wrinkled her nose and she like pursed her lips and like wrinkled her eyebrows and was just like, I'm making it like she's like, I'm going to age faster because like it's the rebellion against. I think it's hilarious and I think it's like a lot of perhaps our generation and younger is starting to see the effects of this and just being like whatever you know like maybe I don't know there's also I will say a lot of 22 year olds who are getting like lip fillers and like you know but they're really young and I think well how old do you think the girl was in that first video um I have a theory I have a question oh the anti the one I just said about like
00:28:25
Speaker
Um, the anti age 25 maybe. Okay. I do think, and I could be wrong and it's not going to be true all across the board, but yeah, the 17 to 19 to 21 year olds, they're just getting out there with the freedom to be able to do whatever they want. Um, I think with how heavily everything is being pushed on us and it gets heavier every year in my opinion, especially with social media. I think it's gonna take less and less time. So between even the ages of 21 and 26, so that gap that we just took for people to go, wow, this sucks. I literally feel like I'm fighting a losing battle. I'm over this. So hopefully that's what that is. Hopefully it's that it's taking people less time. Whereas before, I think it was like maybe you had to be in your late 30s to kind of start to think like, okay, how do I actually feel about this? Am I chasing something I shouldn't be chasing? So that's a theory. But anyways, keep going. And then something else that has had me thinking about this topic for years.
00:29:16
Speaker
it It was actually back when I read the first Hunger Games. Now stick with me here in the book. It doesn't come up in the movie, but in the book, it's kind of right in the beginning of the book. She's talking, I think about, you know, the people in the Capitol and they have like their makeup, their crazy clothes, she kind of implies that they have like surgeries and they Their skin's all pinned up and like looking tight and stuff. And she says she never understood why they wanted to look younger because in her in her district, you never saw anybody old because everyone died, like their life at expectancy wasn't very long. So she's like, so if you did see somebody old, that was a badge of honor.
00:29:51
Speaker
and like you respected them and it was like a great thing to see because nobody ever grew old. And I know that's like fantasy, dystopian, weird, made up story, but that really stuck with me. I read that at like 13 or something and I never forgot that because again, i've I've just kind of been aware for a really long time about women being so down on themselves for aging and something about you, you it was a badge of honor when you were old because no one ever lived that long. Like again, think about your life and the course it's taken. And like, I don't know, in my mind, I do just see old as like a reward and a badge of honor. And I see somebody like my grandma, she's about to turn 96. Stunning is all get out still. She's still just there looking great. And it's just like, what like an honor and a reward to like be there and have the stories you have to tell and and physically and stuff like that. It's just another stage of life, you know? so
00:30:43
Speaker
I love that. I just don't see anything, you know, objectively wrong with it. It's just another thing. Yeah. Well, and I know you were like that Hunger Games thing. It's such a dystopian, like, I mean, that's an intense scenario and it is, but I have you heard the quote that getting old, it says, do not regret growing older. It's a privilege denied to many. That's kind of, that's the ones with the same thing. And that's really like, I mean, it's not, it's not untrue. So anyway. Yeah. And that's where I have some tough love with this whole thing is just and not to be this person, but like not everyone gets to make it to the age you are. So like, there's no reason to be ashamed of it. Like you may as well.
Viewing Aging as a Positive Milestone
00:31:22
Speaker
Um, I wrote down here, like you can't stop aging. So have fun with it along the way. And you'll, see you'll just spend your life a lot happier. Not focusing on that. Still doing the things you want to do. Still laughing, still smiling, not festering over your routine at night to maybe preserve a year of your age. If you just put all that to the side.
00:31:41
Speaker
set out and do what you wanted to do in life, stay healthy in other ways, spend that energy being happier on other things. Guess what? You're going to look a lot better overall and it's just like higher quality of life. like It really breaks my heart that people spend the last three quarters of their life upset at how their body is changing. when that's always what it's done. So it's just like, it's a beautiful thing. Oh, and i the the other point I had with this was people like your mom and and my mom and other people in my life as I watched them get a little bit older by 10 years or so. Is it just me or would you say you think your mom is just like stunning? And like both of our moms have worked out in the sun. but Both of our moms have like
00:32:21
Speaker
gone or are going gray my mom's like letting her gray grow out right now and she looks so cool she's so like silver right now it's so cool oh my gosh and beautiful and i i have vivid memories i was telling chris this i have vivid memories of my mom like out gardening in the sun and like her chest is tanned her forehead's tanned yeah and She looks a little bit older and I was just like, you look so cool. like That is how I want to go. That is how I want to age. And then even seeing people that I know approaching their like mid 30s are starting to get the first little bit of sunspots, maybe the first little bit of yeah the like wrinkles. And I think that's so beautiful. And I'm not even saying this to just
00:33:01
Speaker
Appease the women that were talking to me like you're a beautiful I am so serious when I say those first little signs of like wrinkles around someone's eyes or mouth I find those so cool. It's just like your body's going through stuff You're doing things and it's showing in like a physical way. Like I just I think it's something to be so Embraced and it's it's it's actually like cool-looking I think so too. That is so funny that you also use a specific gardening example because the exact same thing happened with my mom. I mean of course our moms did that. But yeah, I think both of our moms have a very intense beauty. Like I swear such a fierce beauty when you look at them.
00:33:38
Speaker
And you're just like, oh my gosh, you're so beautiful. like They're the kind of beauty that I absolutely want to be. And um I noticed that very strongly in both of our moms. And yeah, even growing up even. like And like the other moms I knew, like other friends, moms, like any of the ones who were active and stuff. like And just lived life. We're outdoors. They worked hard, like especially the, yeah, hardworking, like anyways, that also hardworking women. I think gives a very, this is a maybe a hot take, gives a specific beauty that I think comes only from being a hard working woman. That again, I think we maybe notice that in our moms because our moms are that way. But anyways, so that's a side note. I love what you just said. That was the most perfect example. And that's why you'll notice I probably haven't talked about like sunscreen because a big thing with anti-aging is people harp on sunscreen. Beth and I are or not sunscreen wearers. I have freaked out some people I know by being like, I don't wear sunscreen.
00:34:29
Speaker
Sometimes, if I'm like at the lake for hours, I will do a little bit on my face and shoulders because I don't want to die. But I also like don't believe in using that for the sake of anti-aging because again, our moms were both not really sunscreen wearers and something like you said about the sun being on them for years. is so cool. I don't, again, I don't care if it ages you like 10 years faster, because I've seen comparisons of people who work in the sun, people who don't, it does like, sure, age you faster. I don't care. It's so cool. Again, what do you think our ancestors were doing 200 years ago? Or, you know, even older than that? Like, do you think they were like, Oh, no, I can't go work in the sun today, because it's gonna age me? Or what were they doing? They were out, that's what they looked like.
00:35:11
Speaker
And yeah yeah, anyway. And there were other forms. I think you're so right. Exactly. Other forms of sun protection or the sun protection was for other purposes. It wasn't for aging. It was for like health or or pain. But here's the thing too. A fun fact about sunscreen, I can rant. I can rant so much about this and I won't. I'll spare you guys. But yeah, if you use anything above a 25 SPF, the chemicals in the s SPF are going to give you more cancer than the Sunwell. So that's something that I learned. So I think I use like 15. Yeah, you never use like 10 or 15. Yeah. Yep. You should always be going with a natural sunscreen So something that has like zinc in it um versus any kind of chemicals on screen because the chemicals and higher s SPFs even like the 25 SPFs those literally are more cars like they are more of a carcinogen than the Sun will be getting sunburned and that is so many people refuse to actually look at the science of that and just see that as a
00:36:00
Speaker
see that fact and like base, you know, their life on that. But I do not touch sunscreen unless it is like an all natural zinc based like lower SPF sunscreen. And like you said, going to be out and out for hours. Like when I'm on the, I'm on, I'm out in the sun a lot. So if I'm on a boat for hours, something like that, I will use a little bit, but sunscreen your babies. That's a big thing. Like definitely sunscreen your baby. We're not trying to get blisters over here. Yeah. Well, let's be smart. Yeah. No, no, they're so, that's such a, that's such an interesting thing. I love the way that Sun looks on women's faces after like 20 years. It is the coolest thing. And again, I'm not saying that to be like, you're beautiful. I'm so dead serious. And I think a lot more people agree, but we're not talking about it. Well, because what's currently the louder voice right now, is it those people or is it the anti-aging industry, which pumps billions of dollars into saying the other thing.
00:36:47
Speaker
Anyways, so, um, that was my last bit. Yeah. I don't know if you had anything else. Yeah. I was going to say, I think that that kind of rounds me to my last point, which is just, um, so it's a simple quote and I'll be honest, this has been in my phone notes through my different phones.
Embracing the Honor in Aging Naturally
00:37:06
Speaker
that I've had throughout the years. I don't know the better part of a decade. Um, I swore it was like a quote I heard from someone and I looked on the internet today to try to give credit to whoever wrote this first. Um, cause for years I thought it was like somebody's quote and I couldn't find it. So I'm thinking what it was is a combination of different quotes. Maybe that I but saw at one point I decided to sit down and kind of like meld it and make it its own thing and like my thoughts on it, but here it goes. Okay. Um, okay. Also I will say one other quick note about it. Originally this quote that I had, Where it says subtly it said gracefully it so it was like I don't want to age gracefully um But it's changed to subtly because I think the phrase aging gracefully Actually means women who are okay with aging. They don't use Like anti right. Is that what you would say? I like aging gracefully. Yes, let the gray hairs come You don't use a bunch of procedures like you just let it happen and you don't and you accept your body.
00:38:00
Speaker
Yeah, like when I think of, yeah, a celebrity who's like 80, who's clearly gotten plastic over the course of her life versus somebody who never did, I would say the lady who never did aged gracefully. okay That's like how I use that. yeah Perfect, thank you. When I was a young person who didn't really understand what that phrase meant, I thought gracefully meant like you you're trying to fight it, like you're trying to look younger than you are. And so I and i have subbed since then, since I first wrote this down on my phone, the word gracefully for subtly. um So anyways, um Okay, so it says, I don't want to age subtly. I want people to look at me and be able to see the life I've lived, the wrinkles and laugh lines from joy, the sunspots and freckles from being outside way too long, the white hair that shows I'm real and not hiding anything, the confidence and kindness in my voice that only comes from discovering my purpose, learning to stand up for myself, and learning how to give to others without harming myself. I'm not afraid of the signs of aging because to me, they are signs of living.
00:38:57
Speaker
Oh my gosh. so Fire. i I love that. I think that's a perfect way to end it. That's really like the the core of everything we've been saying is yeah is what you said right there. Perfect. steve I'm not even going to touch it. We're just going to tell you about our socials and where you can find us and the episode's going to be over. Amazing. All right, so you know where to find us. First of all, if you want to hear more episodes, you can find us on Spotify, Apple Podcast, or Zencaster. And as always, go ahead and visit our social media. It's Art of Intention Podcast on Instagram. ah We always post different episode clips and we alert you when the new episode is posted. We share some fun, like, behind the scenes and other things on our stories, are other resources. If you have any questions for us, maybe you have an episode idea or
00:39:47
Speaker
want to maybe be on the podcast, please email us at art of intention podcast at gmail dot.com. And you know what? We're going to see you next week with another episode. We hope you found this one very encouraging and you're beautiful ladies. We love you and go ahead and make sure you encourage another woman today. All right. Bye. Love it. Bye.