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193 - Bright (2017)
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Transcript
Introduction to the Podcast
00:00:10
Speaker
you
00:00:21
Speaker
We may or may not be in a prophecy here at the disenfranchised podcast. We're that podcast all about those franchises of one, those films that fancy themselves full fledged franchises before falling flat on their face after the first film. I am your host, Stephen Foxworthy, and joining me as ever, ah ah the man who honestly is just doing a great job of copying Eich Baronholz's look in this movie, it's Tucker. Hey, Tucker. Hi, Steven. How's it going? Not bad. And I feel like I'm legitimately asking how you're doing tonight because we barely talked today. That's true.
Technical Difficulties
00:01:00
Speaker
That's true. um Yeah. have a whole You know, yeah before we like start these things and we just jumped right in, we're just like, oh, you're here. I'm here. Let's go. Well, we, you know, we talked last night and i yeah you know what? It's Tuesday. I'm ready to get this over with. you
00:01:14
Speaker
You know what, this episode releases in two days. We have had nothing but problems trying to get it recorded. This is us literally our backs against the motherfucking ball trying to get this thing out. Yeah. So just just know that at any time during this podcast, it may stop abruptly and then there'll be like a 30 second outro explaining things that Steven will do. Yeah. and That's the episode 20 minutes did in the middle of the plot. I'm like wait I gotta go That's pretty much been with the last two attempts at recording this episode have been Yeah
00:01:49
Speaker
well Like, literally, we're all here, we're all together, and then Tucker's got a bail, because shit's going down. Speaking of shit going down, our buddy Brett actually isn't a prophecy right now, which is why he's not able to join us. We we wish him well on his prophetic mission and hope for his speedy return, ah maybe with or without a magic wand. Who's to say? Not me.
00:02:16
Speaker
ah h Yeah, me neither. Straight up, I i can't say for sure. Well, you know, and i wonder you're choking it teeth over there I saw that cloud of vapor come out of my mouth and I was like, oh, that's going to make me cough off here in a second. Oh, right. You were. I hit it too hard.
Discussion of 'Bright'
00:02:37
Speaker
hit hit the And look, if ever there's a movie that warranted hitting it a little too hard, it's this one. Tucker, this is the last week, or is it, of our getting jiggy in July? Well, it's the last week of July, so it kind of has to be. But there may be a supplemental episode coming up soon. Who's to say? Not me.
00:02:59
Speaker
Um, but, uh, but yeah, um, and so to close it out, we are discussing, uh, a recent failed franchise starter of that fresh Prince of Bel Air himself, Mr. Willard Smith. And Tucker, what movie are we covering this week? We're talking about Bright. 2017's Bright, directed by David Ayer, written by Max Landis, and starring Will Smith himself, Joel Edgerton, Noomi Rapace, Lucy Fry, Edgar Ramirez, Ike Baronholtz, Margaret Cho, Jay Hernandez,
00:03:38
Speaker
ah Kenneth Choi is in there for a little bit. ah Joe Rogan in a really fucking weird ass cameo. um What a cast. Dare I say it? What a picture. man i wanted to like this movie so much you really did here's the thing though really this movie dares you to like it and then like flick flips you off for trying really yeah this movie does not like its audience at all no man whose idea was it to have him kill that fairy man that was fucked up that's uh... max landis son of uh...
00:04:22
Speaker
Uh, manslaughter, John Landis, acquitted manslaughter, I should say. Yes. On the bright side of the bright side, he directed two blues brothers movies. Right. American werewolf in London. One of the greatest, if not the greatest werewolf movie of all time. Yeah, it's definitely up there for sure. Yeah, it for sure is. And his mother, if I'm not mistaken, is, yeah, Debra Doolman, who was the costumer who gave us the iconic Indiana Jones look. Oh, wow. Yeah. I did not know that. Fun fact. and Impression. Very fun facts. Yeah.
Max Landis and Controversies
00:05:00
Speaker
ah Max Landis, however, um really gross, gross dude. Yeah. Well, yeah, he got me too pretty hard.
00:05:10
Speaker
Oh, damn. And yeah, and wrote a wrote a big wrote a big thing where he condemns sexual assault allegations as a somewhat corrupt enterprise and rejected comparisons to Bill Cosby and Harvey Weinstein on the grounds that he was not a real celebrity while still conceding that some of what's been said about me is true. So that's what man, you don't double down and you don't get to be You don't get to be. You don't admit to doing what you did and then complain about false accusations because that kind of stuff does happen and it's fucked up. correct You don't get to talk about it. If you're over here telling me you did it and then you're going to say, oh, but you're dirt like, what the fuck are you talking about? Shut up. Nope. Piece of shit.
00:06:02
Speaker
Wow. I mean, he learned it from his dad, who basically did some similar shit about the whole helicopter crash, which is the reason why we will probably never cover Twilight Zone, the movie on this podcast, even though half of that movie is awesome. Well, I'll tell you what, that whole movie is awesome, but I can't watch it anymore after I i found out what happened. Luckily, I didn't know until probably my mid 20s. So I got some good watches in there. Yeah. Oh, wow. Yeah, yeah. I was released during the pandemic for the Joe Dante and George Miller parts, because I watched all their filmographies over the over the pandemic. So, yeah. All those segments are fantastic. They should release the the no no manslaughter cut and just cut that entire segment out and maybe have somebody like Ty West do a new one. Twilight's on the movie remastered. There you go.
00:07:01
Speaker
Plus with a plus remastered plus. So, you know, it's got a plus, right? Well, because like a remaster could mean like you found the negatives and you transferred them to 4K. That's typically what a remastered is. Yeah, not that kind of remastered. Oh, no, no, no. You're giving me the bottom finger there. we We add a little 20 minute segment by your boy, Ty West. I mean, I know you would love that. my my favorite My favorite thing about that movie is that John Landis and Steven Spielberg were like at the height of their powers when that movie came out, and they decided to throw a bone to their buddies George Miller and Joe Dante, and their segments just ate the other guys' lunch. like Joe Dante does that that ah recreation of it's so It's a Good Life, which is fucking incredible with the German expressionism and the shadows. And then George Miller does that absolutely unhinged and chaotic version of Nightmare at 20,000 Feet. like
00:07:55
Speaker
With John Lithgow, just like sweating with huge bags under his eyes. It's amazing. It's so good. I love Danny Aykroyd and that. And he's like, you want to see something really scary? was Something really scary? The beginning. I also really love that opening segment with him and Albert Brooks. It is really fun. This has been our mini episode on Twilight Zone, the movie, because we're never going to talk about that movie. And we really don't want to talk about this one. I mean, look, we're going to have to go on some tangents because there's really nothing to say about this movie aside from some broad sweeping complaints and which um believe me, we'll get to those for sure. yeah Very few bright spots, I will say. um I do, though, i we do need to talk about where our boy will is in all of this ah because this is a a Will Smith
00:08:48
Speaker
Um, mini series. So we kind of need to talk about where we left him, uh, when we last discussed him in, uh,
Will Smith's Career
00:08:56
Speaker
what was it after earth in 2013. So this movie comes four years after, and he's kind of in this weird spot where he's doing, he's doing one of two things. He's either showing up in small roles and like cameos, kind of capitalizing on the fact that he was famous once, like favors for friends kind of roles. or he's the lead in films that nobody's watching. um So in 2014, you get Winter's Tale, where he literally plays Satan. Nice. Yeah. I like that. I want to see that now. I've never seen it. It's like Colin Farrell. and Oh, nice. And it's an Akiva Goldsman movie. it's like his like It's Colin Farrell, Jessica Brown Findlay from um
00:09:45
Speaker
Oh, what's it called? Downton Abbey, Russell Crowe, my main crush, Jennifer Connolly. And then it's like below that, it's just like a bunch of who's who's like Matt, Matt Bomer, Lucy Griffiths, Kevin Corrigan's in it. Fucking love Kevin Corrigan. William Hearth is in there for a little bit. It's called Winter's Tale. ah Okay. Winter's Bone is the Academy Award nominated film that introduced us all to Jennifer Lawrence. I had the only reason I remember that movie at all. And I did see it is because on the 40th anniversary special on SNL, that was a Wayne's World segment. And they were doing um they were looking at the movies that were nominated for the Oscar and they just kept saying Winter's Bone. Winter's Bone. This joke has been used three times. Yeah. And half a way of giving me a bone. Winters showing. Yeah. Yeah.
00:10:45
Speaker
Yeah. ah But I mean, the rest of the the rest of this cast is incredible. You've got Ava Marie Saint, Norm Lewis, Finn Whitrock in a small role, Graham Greene, Scott Grimes, like an unbelievable cast. And and Will Smith is the devil for some reason. So, I mean, there you go. It's just a weird fucking relic of a thing. I've wrote down Winter's Bone because I'm an idiot. What is it called? Winter's Tale. Winter's Tale. And that's like a story, not like. Yes. OK, yeah. Not like. Yeah. Not like Fievel goes west. Correct. Not an appendage. I will say the same year he does after Earth, he does a cameo in Anchorman 2. The legend continues as the ESPN reporter. Yeah. During that movie's absolutely ridiculous fight scene that goes on way too long. It is very not good. That movie is not good. A pale imitation of the original.
00:11:40
Speaker
And that scene is not good. But I did enjoy some of how far they went with some of the people like just like, why is Will Smith there? Like there's a bunch of those two. It's like, how do you just like ask everybody? Like everybody's there. Yeah. And I believe that one of the when I saw one of the stars of this movie ah live on stage this past week. Oh, word, because I believe. Anchorman to. Yeah, because guess who's actually in Anchorman to legendary news anchor Bill Curtis, ah who I saw live on stage when I saw a live taping of. Wait, wait, don't tell me for my birthday. and You know what that is, Stephen? That's a maze, Bill.
00:12:37
Speaker
That's what that is, yeah. Bill Curtis, a fucking legend. That guy is amazing. He's got a wonderful voice. No, I dig Bill Curtis. He's a good dude. He he he compared our crowd at Wait, Wait, Don't Tell Me to a drunken party and said we had he had one of the wildest shows he'd ever been a part of and it was all because of us. That's a compliment. I feel like that's a compliment. I'm taking it as one. So check out the Alison Felix episode of the Wait, Wait, Don't Tell Me podcast. And you may hear me guffawing in the audience, particularly when Roy Blunt Jr. says whoop whoop Gangnam style like four times. It's ridiculous. and i love
00:13:20
Speaker
Anyway, 2015, Will Smith does Focus and Concussion. um Two movies, I think concussion is the one where he's like, tell the truth. It's like a big Oscar play and his wife who will not be named was really upset that he didn't get nominated for it. Look, I do not personally know ah any of the people in Will Smith's family. But I have some opinions about some of them. Mm hmm. Just Jada, though. That's all. Keep her name out of your fucking mouth. That's no me and Will are cool and. Hey, I mean, Will's Will's the kind of guy when he does something like he ain't going to do that shit again. Not even close.
00:14:12
Speaker
Well, the Oscars aren't going to give him the chance because he is banned for life. I thought it was for 10 years, is it for life? It is. No, it's for nice. is sure Well, hey, well, I've like luckily for him, he he got his Oscar right there as he was leaving. You know, like what a finally weird night like, hey, you just slapped the guy. But we're going to give you that trophy you've been really trying to get for a while. This is really awkward. And um violent assault is no joke. No. But I will say that I'm past it. I'm over it. Well, it's the reason why we're never getting a sequel to this movie. I know. And that's what I was. I was so mad. I was so mad because like I hated this movie, but I'd watch the sequel. You would. You would. You're that kind of glutton for punishment. You would 100% watch the sequel to this.
00:15:07
Speaker
And so when I'm reading that this didn't get the sequel, like it was happy happening. And they pulled it immediately after the Oscars. I was like, man, I fucking slept. I've slept a few people. Come on. Come on, guys. Brady going to have to choke a bitch. Right. Look, come on, guys. Come on. The year before this comes out, he does his first collaboration with David Ayer, which is a little movie called Suicide Squad. Um, which is, gosh, I hate to say it, probably his biggest hit of this era until we get to 2019. Like he doesn't have a lot going on. Um, so Suicide Squad is kind of it by default, really.
00:15:51
Speaker
And then he also has another Oscar play, Collateral Beauty, in 2016 as well. And then this movie comes in 2017. He follows it up. He's only got a handful of movies after this. um Aladdin, the remake where he plays the genie, Gemini Man, the Ang Lee film where he plays himself at multiple ages, um Spies in Disguise, which is a pun, Bad Boys for Life, Yeah, Richard for which he wins his Oscar. OK, Emancipation, another Oscar play and Bad Boys Ride or Die. Yeah. Seven movies in between 2017 and 2024. Two real good movies between 2017 and 2024. Yeah. Yeah, spies in disguise. You know what spies in disguise is about Tucker.
00:16:48
Speaker
um spies, but they're like, they wear disguises maybe. What if there was a spy and disguise in a disguise? I wish you and I were in the same place because we could absolutely do the the old spies and disguise challenge from the blank check podcast where they would have someone watch the trailer up to a certain point and then pause it and the other person would have to ask like what they think it's about and then you watch the rest of the trailer. and it's Wait, doesn't he brain switch with a bird or something? Yes, he turns into a bird. Yeah. All right. See, that's why it's also a pun because he's in disguise, but he's also in disguise and in disguise. I like that. I might have to watch that just because that's a really clever title. I wasn't going to watch it before, but they they sold me. I mean, if you're going to put that much effort into the title, like I'm going to watch your movie for sure.
00:17:43
Speaker
So that's kind of where, that's, that's where we are as a society. That's where we are as a podcast, quite
Director David Ayer's Work
00:17:49
Speaker
frankly. yeah Um, but yeah, bright. This is, um, this sure is something I got to tell you, man, this, this movie, damn oh boy, it's something. All right. Um, let's, let's do David Ayer, I guess while we're here might as well. Um, uh, he's, uh, you know, just, he's, he's dude grew up not far from where I am right now in a little place called Champaign, Illinois. just a dude yeah just a dude who um who made a lot of kind of shitty movies honestly um am I allowed to say that I'm gonna it's my probably people like yeah people liked that one with Cuba Gooding jr. radio no I'm sorry not Cuba Gooding jr. um it was Jake Gyllenhaal and that other dude end of watch Michael Pena
00:18:40
Speaker
Yes. Yes. Yes. Hey. And you know what? You know why I never watched that even though I- That's kind of his big thing, yeah. even Even though I really, really wanted to see it, somebody spoiled it for me. Those bitches. Just like casually. Like, like it didn't even matter. I mean, it's end of watch, so. and I wanted to see it because it just seems really cool. And I like a lot of the cast. I think that movie is the reason why Max Landis saved this for David Ayer is because of his love for End of Watch is my guess. Yeah, dude I still want to watch. I forgot what the twist is. Maybe I can watch it now. I can definitely watch my list. Put it on your list. I just realized I don't remember what the twist is.
00:19:32
Speaker
I if I knew it, I would spoil it for you all over again like a dick no dude. um Why would you do that? I thought we afraid. But no, his first film is 2005's Harsh Times, and then he follows it up with 2008's Street Kings. Wait, that's the one where Christian Bale was like the the street gangster guy. He has tattoos, right? Him and Freddie Rodriguez and Eva Longoria. That's that's I saw that. when it came out. yeah And i might I might even own it on Voodoo. I'll tell you what, I don't know what I thought about it because I was so hypnotized by Christian Bale's performance. I will say a couple of ah couple of early David Ayer, like before that though, he writes a screenplay for U-571. He writes a screenplay for The Fast and the Furious. Oh, hey, people like that. Steven likes that.
00:20:30
Speaker
I like that franchise. I liked that one. I liked the first one. I saw I worked at Hollywood, Hollywood video when it came out. So I had to watch it for research purposes. Sure. And then he writes a screenplay for a little movie called Training Day, which wins Denzel his second Oscar. King Kong and got shit on him. I'm police. Right. He also writes the screenplay for a future episode of this podcast, SWAT. uh before getting uh before getting into harsh times he also directs street kings a movie he does not write and then uh writes and directs end of watch and uh then his 2014 two written directed by sabotage and fury
00:21:15
Speaker
2016 he does Suicide Squad and then follows that up with Bright in 2017. He's directed two movies since then, The Tax Collector in 2020 and The Beekeeper in 2024, which feel like future episodes of this podcast. I don't know if they are, but they feel like it. You know, I heard that Fury, people like that one. People like that movie? I don't feel like it was a big deal when it came out. It was a Netflix movie, wasn't it? I don't I don't know if it was. Let's look up Fury. Let's talk Fury. People liked it. I'm going to I'm going to estimate that it has at least a 7.0 on IMDB. Because if it didn't, I wouldn't remember. Oh, I think people like that. um That movie has a it's I can see the Metascore is a 664. It's got a 7.6 on IMDB.
00:22:10
Speaker
Yeah, people like that movie, but it's a Netflix movie, so people really enjoyed it for a day. And then everybody forgot about it and they got but lost in all that content. Right. And that's kind of the horrible thing about Netflix movies is that's the thing that tends to happen to them and their shows, their shows. And some of them are so good. but They don't give a fuck about them and they don't promote them and they don't do well. So they don't renew them and they end on a cliffhanger and it pisses me off. I don't watch Netflix shows. you I don't watch Netflix shows now until I know that the series is done and there's no cliffhanger.
Frustrations with Streaming and TV Series
00:22:49
Speaker
I'm gonna watch the full series because Netflix, mm-mm, no. Nope, you're not gonna do that to me again. Don't do me way too many times. Netflix fucking mandates that every one of their shows ends in a cliff, every season ends in a cliffhanger unless they are allowed to wrap it up the way they want.
00:23:05
Speaker
because there was this coming back for a potential next season that will probably never exist. There was this show on there with the gal who played ah the younger version of Beverly Marsh in the new it movies. Yeah, modern it movies. And she was discovering that she had psychic powers very much carry style. And at the end. Dude, like it was, it was, that was it. It was about to pop off. The whole first season was the buildup. I feel bad about myself. Is that what it was called or something? Something like that. Or I don't want to be here or something. It's a weird dumb title. I don't want to live on this planet anymore. as honest Yeah, it was really good. And I was so that's the last time I let that happen to me. So I was like, no, fuck that. I'm not doing this anymore. I i mean, I don't I don't blame you because Netflix is real real bad about that.
00:23:55
Speaker
Mm hmm. Like, man, I like that show special bad about that. I'm not OK with this is the name of the show. You know. It got seven episodes released during the pandemic. It released during the pandemic and no one fucking watched it. I did. He was so mean. Same. Yeah. And it's got her and the kids played Stan. Yeah. The kid that played Stan's in it, too. Yeah. And I love how it's a great question. I love how they don't push a romance between them like they're allowed to just be friends. You know, right. I feel like like maybe there's a bit of a spark between them, which is rad, but like the show doesn't force it. They just let them be pals. It's based on a comic book by Charles S. Forsman. So maybe I should check out the comic book.
00:24:48
Speaker
May write that story. I don't know how I don't know how close it is to ah how close an adaptation it is. What's the thing? Those Netflix shows can go either way. It's called I'm not OK with this. OK, I'm not. That's pretty much going to be the show notes for this one is Tucker adds a lot of stuff to his watch slash reading list. I'm going to have a busy winter. He's best. You watch this shit now. Yeah. ah time Well, you can't you can't watch shows during work. I mean, I don't like to because I'd be watching it on my phone. Oh, OK. Depends on what it is. Fair enough. Depends on what it is. And you know what, Steven? No, speaking of watching shows, I don't think I'm going to watch the new season of The Boys. um and I just finished it. It's not it's not bad, but it's it's not as good as some of the past seasons. I just think I'm kind of over it. That's fine.
00:25:47
Speaker
You're allowed that feeling sometimes like I was excited for a minute and like the more I think about it, I'm like, I just like, I like the other seasons were great. I had a good time, but I just, I just kind of feel like I'm done with it. I don't know how else to explain it. I just, no, thanks. No, I've been hard to you, but no, thanks. I did that with a game of thrones. Just tap right the hell out of of Game of Thrones, like two seasons before the end. so like You know what? Fuck this. I've got way too much time, and or ah way way too little time, to to be messing with all of this ridiculousness. so I didn't even want to watch it at all. I had no desire, but I duly watched it. So like, some men and I had to watch it, you know what I mean? Right. I know exactly what you're talking about, man.
00:26:38
Speaker
i under believe me, I understand. And man, I fucking hated that show from the beginning to the end. Every episode I was like, that's fucking stupid. What's that for? Who cares? That's really dumb. Fuck off with that. OK, episodes over. Cool. Finally. And we're out. It's fan fucking test.
00:27:00
Speaker
Yeah, so I would have watched the next episode. No, actually, no, I certainly, certainly don't you need to set the boundaries here. Mm hmm. Mm hmm. Yeah, no, I did that with Game of Thrones and the the show that that made me realize that I could do that and and gave me permission to do that was lost. And I was like, you know what? I don't want to put myself through anything like that last season again. But then I but then i peer pressured myself into watching all of Heroes. And that was a mistake.
00:27:33
Speaker
yeah Well, it was a social thing though, because I would like hang out with my friends. It was like one time I got to see like my friends from Barnes and Noble, like I'd go and I'd hang out with like the four of us would get together and just watch lost. And it was or not lost heroes. and And that was really fun. But the show started going really downhill really fast. And so yeah, that was it was very awkward. Yo, Terry O'Quinn's on that show, right? Um, no, uh, lost. Yes, but not, uh, okay. Yeah, that's what I meant. That's what I meant. Yo, that's the stepfather, dude. You know, you've seen that step, you've seen that stepfather movies. No, I'm going to wait until we cover the remake with Dylan Baker on this podcast and I'm going to watch them all. Damn, damn. I, I quote that movie all the time and nobody realizes it.
00:28:23
Speaker
Because in different places, I'm known as different names. And so sometimes someone will be calling my name and I'll be like, wait a minute. Who am I here? I'm like, oh, OK, yep, I'm in New Hampshire. So I'm OK. Yeah, got it. Right. So I'm this name. Yes, I'm I'm the kind of person that if I got arrested, we'd be there for a while on the aliases. like A long time. like Fair. Like, all right, boys, settle in, get a cup of coffee. All right. I hope you have time because we're going to be here a while, gentlemen. Yeah. Oh, I love it. OK. Um, fuck. Bright man. I don't know. What the fuck are we doing here?
Plot Summary of 'Bright'
00:29:10
Speaker
How is it to the plot? I guess. Yeah, let's do it. All right. So the the the this is the part of the show called the plot in 60 seconds where we recount the plot of the film we watched in 60 seconds or less. And to decide who we turn to the coin of justice. um Yeah, I will flip the coin. Tucker will call it in the air. Heads is Lady Liberty. Tails is the crest of Gibraltar. Yeah. Call it in the air, Tucker. Tails. And you son of a bitch, it's Tails. God, what even what am I even going to do about this fucking movie? Well, which part did you fall asleep during during? Because I'm pretty sure I fell asleep during a different one, so I might be able to jump in and help you out. The beginning.
00:29:57
Speaker
um If you miss anything, I'll let you know at the end. I mean, here's the thing. I'm going to do broad strokes because that's how it goes. You're going to put 60 seconds on the clock for me. Oh, yeah. It's a yeah. You're right. That is something I do sometimes when we do these sorts of things. ah Yeah. 60 seconds. i'm You know what? I'm ready when you are just there talking. All right, urban fantasy, it's it's l LA, but it's also the Middle Earth or something. And there's an orc on the police force, but nobody respects him because he's not blooded or whatever the fuck. And Will Smith is kind of racist against fairy creatures, but he's partners with the orc guy and who like wasn't watching and was like protecting a kid and he got shot and is just coming back. And anyway, there's this little girl, I don't know how they find her or what she's about, because I probably fell asleep during that part.
00:30:46
Speaker
but she's being chased by the girl the original girl with the dragon tattoo and um who's like able to have this magic wand the little girl has a magic wand and it turns out only brights can wield magic wands and so I don't know there's a lot of fighting 30 seconds the orc dude gets shot at one point and kicked down a puddle and then the the little girl picks up a wand and like brings him back to life and um he's like, ooh, I'm alive now. and And then they, the little girl's dying. So they have to take her to the place where a girl with a dragon tattoo is to put her in a pool or something to bring her back to life. And Will Smith turns out he's a bright, the numero pace dies. The little girl lives and they're honored as heroes and the orc gets bloodied. And that's your time.
00:31:29
Speaker
Steven I gave you 10 extra seconds because when I said 30 seconds it was 20 seconds because I forgot to watch because I was so hypnotized by your plot in 60 seconds you know what I liked about Will Smith's racism in this is that not only does it get a redemption arc, obviously, but I related to something very surprisingly, and I never thought of this before, how him both him and his wife are to each other when they're talking to each other, they're saying some racist shit about orcs.
00:32:03
Speaker
Hmm. But then, like, you notice that they don't say that around their kid and their kid is even like, you know, we like don't be racist and stuff. Right. Yeah. And ah that kind of made me think of like, that's how we get better generationally. Like, because even if maybe maybe if our parents weren't as. um ah I don't know, less like less ignorant. I don't know. Right. I'm just saying we're in their ignorance, perhaps. what I'm trying to say, I'm better than my parents ever were. And it's because even though they had their moments back in the day, they taught me not to be that way. They told me not to be that way. And I had I'd never even thought of that before. And then I saw that movie. I was like, oh, that is kind of how it works, though. That's wild. So hooray for the next generation.
00:32:59
Speaker
Will will Smith straight-up murders a fairy with a broom Yeah, yeah. And, you know, it's not like a bug. Like if they had made it look like a bug, I would still be upset because I don't like to really kill anything unless it's like a me or them situation. ah Like mosquitoes are about the only thing I kill because the only time they interact with me is when they're trying to drink my blood. um But really outside of that, I just avoid stuff or, you know, I don't like to see animals, even bugs being killed. It kind of upsets me a little bit.
00:33:30
Speaker
um And so this was a humanoid thing. This was like a little mini person with wings that had a voice and it was screaming. And he just beat it to death right there in his yard and said hey to the homies next door. no And it also said fairy lives don't matter today. Which, ooh, is that like some ham-fisted bullshit? And it's not even good ham-fisted bullshit. It's stupid and awful ham-fisted bullshit. Ham-fisted bullshit is rarely if ever good.
00:34:06
Speaker
um I can sometimes find enjoyment in it, but this I certainly did not. No, no. And again, I would say that's kind of the Max Landis special plot that is kind of incomprehensible characters that are unlikable and terrible and punctuated by a couple moments where you can go, that's kind of cool. And that's it. That's that. Congratulations. We've just made a Max Landis movie. We we did it. And you know, the characters in this movie, I Actually, the only character that I even remotely liked was the Joel Edgerton's character, the the ah the orc that was the guy or the Will Smith's partner. um But did they have to? Like, why was he so stupid? Like he like the whole time it was like it was his first day, but they had been partners for a while. Like why did they portray him as such an idiot, like an incompetent.
00:34:58
Speaker
it It honestly it feels and even though works aren't real it feels racist against works because like all the racist people are saying like works are stupid or two stupid and then are like main work who's like our protagonist is a Just a fucking dummy like come on guys like come on million dollar heart nickelhead. man yeah Yeah, that's right. Right. And it's too bad because I really like that character otherwise. I really like the performance, too. Like that was yeah that's one thing I really liked about that movie was I'm going to say, do I say? And I thought the performance was really good. Yeah. Well, yeah. Well, I'll say it. I hated everybody else, though. Everybody else just. Yeah.
00:35:46
Speaker
Yeah. And I mean, look, this movie is it's long stretches of like dumb shit punctuated by, like I said, a couple moments where you're like, huh, that's cool. Um, like the first two thirds of this movie, I could not give two shits. I could not tell you what happens in the first two thirds of this movie. Um, but the last third. Where, um, like right after Joel Edgerton is like brought to life and they have to kind of like race to save the little girl. I don't know why those things, cause I don't know who that fucking little girl is and why they have her, but like, yes.
00:36:24
Speaker
Yeah, exactly. Something at least is happening at this point. The plot is moving forward as opposed to just languishing in a pool of its own vomit for a while. Meandering. It's meandering. If if it's anything, good God, this movie is insufferable. It insists upon itself. It doesn't. That's the thing. It doesn't even do that, man. Like it doesn't even put in that much effort.
Critiques of 'Bright'
00:36:49
Speaker
It's like it doesn't insist on itself. It's just kind of like implies that you should watch it. Yeah, it's it's a movie over here. Right. Hey. You want to you want to come watch this movie with us? Hey, man, this this is a movie. You want to watch it? It's certainly one of the movies of all time. It's on Netflix. So we know you're going to.
00:37:13
Speaker
Yeah, we know what you're going to like it because it's on Netflix. What the hell else are you going to do? yeah Oh, it's not like there are a dozen other streaming services all putting out their own, you know, all their own shit now. Yeah. Max Landis allegedly said of this movie, this is my Star Wars. OK. OK. Mm hmm. I feel secondhand embarrassment for him having said that. Uh huh. Uh huh. Uh huh. Uh huh. Yep. He, uh, he said this was his Star Wars and, um, you know, that happened and we all let it happen. Well, and you know, it could have been, had it not been for the Oscars, like I say, they were making, and they were making that sequel. They were making it, you know, why couldn't have been a Star Wars, Tucker. Do you know why? Why? Because people like Star Wars.
00:38:06
Speaker
I know what I'm saying is you get you get ah a better director in there or a different director, which was what was going to happen ah at the end of it all. um Maybe Max Landis grows as an artist. I'm just saying, man, like I want something good in this world and I want something good with these kinds of characters. And that's why I'm saying I wish it were his Star Wars. I wish that second when it come out and just at the small chance that it would have been rad. like really, really rad.
00:38:40
Speaker
I mean, no, dude, I don't think it is. No, I mean, we're looking at just something kind of ridiculous. I mean, if you want urban fantasy, I'm not saying it's going to be good, but like The Last Witch Hunter, I would say better than this potentially. Oh, that was fine. I did. I very like the most mediocre you could possibly get without being bad. Last Witch Hunter, that movie. Right. Kind of sets the bar for that, honestly. Right. But I mean, you know, some some urban fantasy there. You've got kind of all that all that shit going on. um The the kid who would be king, the Joe Cornish movie, the kid who would be king. I see that.
00:39:19
Speaker
I haven't either. But you know, apparently a future episode of this podcast, the kid who would be gay. Nice. Another future episode of this podcast, Sorcerer's Apprentice. You can watch ah with Nick Cage. Is that the one he's in? Yes. Yes, he is the wizard in that one. And one legs his own k Nick Cage. And um also in it starring
00:39:44
Speaker
jay bear shell okay also in it you're just fucking flapping your arms around i'm like what the fuck are you doing right now that's my jay bear shell collect you can see it in the i can't go the jay bear shell yeah
00:40:01
Speaker
Yeah, ah he's always just kind of thrusting his body about as he speaks. Right. Fun to watch. It's very fun to watch him in Blackberry contain that because you know it's in there and he wants to let it out, but he doesn't. I've heard Blackberry is really good. It's really good. I want to I want to see it because I've heard Glenn Howerton is incredible. in that movie Fantastic. Yes. He's really, really good. There are some emotional moments with him that not that I'm saying that I didn't think he had it in him, but I've never seen him done anything like I've never seen him do anything like that before. And I was very impressed. Right on. And hey, it's also a TV show. You can either watch the two hour movie or you can watch three episodes of an hour television show, like an extended version of the movie episodally. They're both on Hulu. I think they're both on Hulu.
00:40:55
Speaker
Let's find out. I think enough time has passed since I watched the movie that I might go back and actually watch the the serialized version just to get that extra stuff. but um Yeah, it's the same thing. It's just cut differently with new scenes and like stuff moved around. I mean, Ingmar Berkman did the same thing with Fanny and Alexander. So a word. Yeah. ah Yes, it's on Hulu. It's also on Canopy for those of those of our listeners with the library cards and participating libraries. I believe that would just be the film though, that would be on Canopy probably. Potentially. And for our friends in the UK and Australia, it's on Paramount+. plus Yeah, it's on Paramount+. plus Mate. If you're if you're in New Zealand, it's on Netflix. Bruce.
00:41:51
Speaker
Oh, my Zealand. No, I was still on Australia, Bruce. Good night, Bruce. Time to category dance, Paul. No, because maybe the the money Python sketch where they're all professors at the college and they're all named Bruce. Right. And the one guy's name is not Bruce, but they decide to call him Bruce anyway. They're calling Bruce anyway. Right. Yeah. And then they sing the, uh, the drunken philosophers song, which is a song I showed to my philosophy professor in college and he thought it was the funniest thing and made all of his classes. ago It's really good. good. Yeah. Do I know all the words? Maybe. I hope so. Straight up. Maybe Australia, Australia, Australia. Yeah.
00:42:38
Speaker
All right. Good story. Oh, I thought you were going to do it there for a second. I was like, well, is he going to? No, no. I don't want to get like copyrighted or whatever the fuck. Yeah. And I really don't want to talk about this movie. I'm not going to lie because it's lame. Look, it's just not good. And everything about it sucks. And even the good stuff sucks because it's in a movie that sucks and it's disappointing because the rest of it sucks because the good stuff is really rad. It's just all around bad time. Can't even enjoy the good parts. Here's the thing, because it's not even that interesting a movie. Like, I mean, we can talk about like some of the performers and like where they were, like talk about how Numi Rapace had been in Prometheus and the Girl with the Dragon Tattoo movies, but the Swedish ones. You just did. You just did. But just how much time can we eat up with that shit? Like really? the hand
00:43:32
Speaker
None at all. I submit. I submit none at all. But you know what, Steven? No, what, Tucker? We're sitting here at about 45 minutes. So if we can fill another 15 minutes with something that will make our episode an hour and a half, because it's always once you start doing the numbers, it's always a half hour. After starting the numbers, always. All right. So if we can. ah So how about how about that local sports sports team, Stephen? How's the weather out there, man? It's pretty good. Rainy. It's raining. Rainy is fucked today. Hey, Stephen, how's your mother? It's a howdy mother for me. She's good. She actually visited this weekend in celebration of our our shared birthdays. We took her to a ah cheese restaurant here in Chicago. i have same birthday And Hers is hers is five days before mine.
00:44:25
Speaker
My mom's is seven days after mine. o Hooray for close birthdays. High five. high five Yeah, dude. My roommate, um the the boy that I take care of, he was born one day after his mother's birthday. One day. I just think that's wild. That is wild. That's pretty fun. birthday buddies, the boy who calls all monitors, Stephen, because you told him that when I was on the monitor. Now you're just the dude that lives in there. He was asked about you today, man. We were in here playing a video game and he was pouring popcorn all over my couch like and like he pointed pointing at the computer and he said, Stephen, I was like, no, man, he's not there right now. He's he's sleeping or something. I don't want to wake him up. I don't want to knock on the the display. And I don't want to knock him. I don't want to wake him up, you know.
00:45:22
Speaker
Sure. I appreciate that. Thank you. Yeah. So you just live. You live in here. Right here. Yeah. I mean, whether it's not as bad as it was the last time we recorded because last time we recorded there was a fucking tornado going on outside. Oh, and it sounded fantastic, too. Yeah. Like for real. I enjoyed the edit. I enjoyed it. I didn't do much on that one because I didn't have a lot of time, but I did clean some stuff up. But I definitely. left You'll do even less on this one. That's true. That's why I'm hoping we don't like fuck up at all, because I've been making mental notes and there's been nothing so far that I would have to edit out. There are definitely a few times that I would want to, but I'm not going to have the time to take time. You was just died coughing at the beginning of this episode.
00:46:08
Speaker
Yeah, but see, that is that was over two seconds, but the payoff is worth it. So I would have left that in anyway. If the payoff was I might have shortened the silence a little bit. Yeah, the payoff is worth it for sure. No. Sure enough. It's just a little bit over. I hope. You know what? I'm okay if this episode is under under 90 minutes. I'm okay with that. Yeah. Yeah. Wow. All right. Steven's trying to get wild tonight. Okay. No, I just, I just, I could not fucking care less about this fucking movie is is really what it comes down to. Um, like Will Smith, um, do better man. Just in all aspects of life, do better.
00:46:44
Speaker
um It's a shame. first rock att the oscars um You say quit it like he's continuously doing it. Like every week he goes and finds him and smacks him. He's been banned for 10 years. We don't know what he would have done in those intervening years. You said for life. You said for life. but he' said Well he is a bad boy for life, Tucker. You have to admit. So who's to say he won't do it? Die together. Who's to say he won't do it in 10 years? I'm amazed Martin Lawrence didn't come up and start slapping kid Chris Rock too. I almost said Kid Rock. That's completely different rock. That's very, very different. Wildly different rock. Was Martin Lawrence there? I doubt it. Martin Lawrence getting invites to the Oscars, please. If he had been though, tucker I would have expected him to at least walk up there with him. Right.
00:47:32
Speaker
yeah I would be a little disappointed if he didn't, honestly. Sure. Probably the first phone call he got after that happened, probably. Probably. Although Martin probably heard it from both Chris and Will, because I mean, Martin will used to be a standup. So. Yeah, dude. He and Rock probably run together or or have run together in the past, so. dad Yeah, dude. Yeah, dude. Not that Chris Rock is like a beacon of good opinions or anything, but. no Chris Rock is what it is. I mean, I like Chris Rock, but I don't really have any kind of opinion of him as a person, honestly. um But yeah, yeah, dude. He strikes me as one of those you can't make jokes anymore kind of guys. And I'm just like, you know. Well, you can just kind of, you know, be clever and funny. Yeah.
00:48:26
Speaker
yeah That's true. Yeah, this movie could have been made. The sequel to this movie could have been made in like 2019. It was supposed to be made, it started filming in 2019 in Germany. um And then... Yeah, that's in Deutschland. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah.
00:48:49
Speaker
yeah like it like it's why thousand and fear Steven yeah yeah yeah yeah um but uh it was delayed due to Smith's busy schedule um air eventually drops out there want to bring in the terrier Lula terrier who did What was the he was? Oh, he they recently brought him in to do Fast X. Like he's just kind of one of those guys you like bring on when your movie is starting to go to hell. ah You bring on Louis Lauterier. And then, yeah, Netflix, Chris Rock ah gets slapped and Netflix says, you know what? No sequel for you. Hey, that's the thing from the beginning. That's the thing we say every week. The thing from the beginning.
00:49:36
Speaker
We don't even say it. It's Arnold Schwarzenegger. Our patron saint, Arnold Schwarzenegger. We've done eight episodes on Arnold. What's the thing? Which one was your favorite of all the Arnold movies we covered? Which one's your favorite? The movies or the episodes? Because that's ah those two different questions. You know, the films, the actual films. Oh, true lies. I love true lies, true lies rules. um Total recall, probably a very close second.
00:50:07
Speaker
word and commando probably three which i think is a very solid top three frankly honorable special honorable mentioned killing gunther a movie i had never heard of when i put it on this list and uh was really kind of uh amused by i was pleasantly surprised at how amusing i found killing gunther i want to see that because wasn't it like written by um and kill him thank you i don't know how to say his name You just said it, but I would not be able to repeat it to you. ah But I was like him on. oh Tear. Repeat after me. Tear. Tear. n And Kill. Kill. Um. Um. Tear and kill. Colin Ternum.
00:51:00
Speaker
I just can't. I want to. I want to. Didn't he write it, though? I really liked him on SNL. You could always tell when it was one of his sketches because he had a very specific style, kind of like how Mikey Day always has like the sketches that are like listing things off. You always know the Mikey Day sketch because we're listing things in some manner. He wrote it, directed it and starred in it. Oh, nice. Yeah, I'm way into that. I still haven't seen it because I wasn't on the. you yeah You weren't a part of the podcast then. yeah you were not i mean I wasn't a host. right you hadd been on doing a lot of stuff behind and I was doing a lot of stuff behind the scenes because I edited that episode, but yeah. yeah but's it's oh Bobby Moynihan too, nice. Yeah, Coby Smulders as well, Taren's wife, Coby Smulders.
00:51:45
Speaker
Yeah, du um yeah it's it's got a really fun cast. It's a fun movie. I'm not going to lie. It's a fun, fun, fun movie. Alison Tolman in there as well from Fargo season one, your beloved Fargo. Yeah. yeah You like that show. I do, um every season. But yeah, there you go. So, I i mean, Killing Gunther, is it a great movie? No, but is it kind of a fun movie? Yes, absolutely it is. Would you say it's better than 4.8 out of 10 stars? I would, yes. That's the IMDB rating, 53 a metascore.
00:52:24
Speaker
what would you what did Do you remember what you gave it on that episode? Not top my head. I want to say probably two and a half or three. Oh, sweet. That's pretty fantastic. Yeah, I really liked it. I thought it was very fun. Damn it. I was editing a list on letterbox and now I have to save my changes there. Oops. So I can look straight up. Oops. Oh, we're doing a letterbox score on it. i'm I'm looking at my letter. oh you' great yeah oh Oh, I gave it I gave it a three. I gave it a three out of five. Yeah, I'm going to have to look at it, putting it on my list. Brett gave it a two out of five, which we meeting in the middle. That's a two and a half out of five. So dude, yeah, this franchise says it's fine.
00:53:07
Speaker
It's pretty all right. It's okay. Not a waste of time completely. You could, you there are worse ways you could spend a Saturday. um um But yeah, let's, so fuck it, just looking up the when it came out. I'd say Bright didn't have a box office. Did they put it in theaters at all? Sometimes Netflix folks will drop it for like a few days or something like Los Angeles, New York. Usually, it'll only do that if it's trying for Oscar contention or if there's like a contractual obligation like with. ah Yeah. Like with Rian Johnson's. um
00:53:42
Speaker
uh glass onion glass onion yeah didn't they do that with um no they didn't do that with the irishman was there a small there was a limited theatrical run there was was because they were trying they were trying for oscar contention on that one yeah and you have to at least release it in new york and l.a for a period of time and again uncle marty's gonna want the theatrical release on that one um But I do have the weekend box office for December 22nd No, wait was it? No, this movie came out on December 13th. So I'm sorry it is The it is the weekend before my apologies December 15th 2017 in number one speaking of your boy, Ryan Johnson
00:54:28
Speaker
I saw this movie opening day in theaters. Is it Knives Out? No, it's Star Wars Episode 8, The Last Jedi. The Ryan Johnson Star War. Correct. AKA the best Star War. I did too. i out of the Out of the new trilogy it's my favorite it's heads and tails above all the rest of them honestly I I'd put it up against any other movie in the trip in the in the entire fucking fucking franchise too i love Well that the thing about that though is is where it gets me I do like it better than the other two in that in the modern trilogy but
00:55:06
Speaker
I think that Empire Strikes Back is a better Star Wars film than Last Jedi, but I think Last Jedi is just a better film. Does that make sense? Yeah, no, I agree. The Last Jedi is the better film for sure. I think Empire is the best Star Wars film that exists. Sure. But very strange you'll hear me talk about the Star War because I notoriously do not give a fuck. Empire is my third favorite Star War. Really? What's your favorite Star War, Steven? The Last Jedi. And then the first Star War. First Star War. And then the Empire. And then Empire. Yeah, that's my order. In second place, Ferdinand, what if John Cena played a bull? Oh, yeah, that's the animated movie. Yeah.
00:55:59
Speaker
Well, didn't it used to be a cartoon or something, though? It was. Yeah, it was a Disney cartoon, I believe. Yeah. But it was released by 20th Century Fox. So maybe not. I don't know. I'm pretty sure Disney did a version of it, though. I'm pretty sure. I did. They did. Had they bought Fox at that point? No, I don't believe so, because it's not listed as Disney. Oh, yeah, that was kind of recent. Yeah. The number three film is the Disney Pixar film of the year. It's Coco making me a Poco Loco. Oh, is that the one where you don't talk about what's his nuts? No, that's in Kanto. Oh, end with O.
00:56:39
Speaker
Oh, is it the guitar one? Yes, it's the one where the kid goes down to the to the underworld to meet his grandfather. Oh, yeah, that one was fun. I never saw it. I ah fucking ugly cried at the end of that movie. That movie is fucking devastating. dev state um in fourth or in fourth place wonder to the one or not to the wonder just wonder um is that i think that's the one with uh... jacob tremblay and one will send julia roberts but there was a what if someone wondered something i wonder what wonder is about yes that is the one with the one will send julia roberts and jacob tremblay uh... where he's got like something like his face is weird or something
00:57:21
Speaker
um in fifth place is ah Justice League, but apparently not the Snyder Cut, ah prompting you know millions of angry fanboys around the world. Oh, because 2017. Yeah. Yeah, I didn't like it it. I would call it Warner Brothers, Justice League. and i I think Joss Whedon's a piece of shit, but even I would say that's not his movie. um It is more Zack Snyder's movie than Joss Whedon's movie. but He finished it and he added things. So I would say that at the behest of the So it's Warner Brothers. You should have. You should have had Justice League, the Snyder Cut called Justice League, and then the original one called the Joss Whedon cut.
00:58:05
Speaker
Or the David Zazlov cut, or he probably wasn't. And Warner Brothers at the time. It would have confused people, but it would have been accurate. And well I really hope. and I'm sorry. I really hope that the Snyder Cut gets a VHS release, because how are you gonna waste a 4x3 and not put that bitch out on VHS? And you know I'm gonna buy it, especially if it comes on two tapes and I gotta put the other one in and halfway through. Two? Bitch, it's gonna come on four. Why? It's only four hours long. You can put a two-hour movie on a VHS tape.
00:58:46
Speaker
Yeah but why would you expand it out to four four different tapes man? but I mean did Titanic need to be on two tapes? No. Yeah. But it was and people bought it. know and You know why? Because Titanic. It did. You can only get so much on a VHS tape without ah like lessening the quality, which is why I used to have the different speeds that you could record at. Like it's going to look real good, but it's going to take up a lot of tape or it's going to look like shit and you're going to get 100 things on this tape like studios. Don't fuck around, man. It's got to be it's got to look the best. So, yeah, if it's over two hours, it it needs to be half of it needs to be on another tape.
00:59:31
Speaker
I'm saying, give me the Snyder cut VHS, please. I will buy it. There are. I could probably. I could probably just tape it off of HBO Max onto a VHS tape. You probably could. Why haven't you done that yet? Oh.
00:59:55
Speaker
idea. Put it on your list. Put it on your list. Yeah. Yes. I'm going to do this now. How will I get it to where like it doesn't show the little play buttons and stuff at the beginning, though? um um we do I don't want that on there. I want it to be authentic. Start recording before you play the movie so you can edit it out. Which I have edited VHS tapes before. I know you have. I'm not surprised by this knowledge at all. The the copy of Mr. Smith Goes to Washington that we had a Hollywood video when I worked there, it broke. And I was like, no, no, I'm not. This shall not stand. And Tyler Durden did. I just got a little piece of Scotch tape because at at that point I had worked at a movie theater. I had done projection and movie theater, right film projection. So I had cut movies together.
01:00:46
Speaker
Plus, I had I went to school for broadcasting and I learned how to edit stuff on reel to reel. So VHS tape. No big deal. Let's get a piece of Scotch tape. Bam. Fixed it. So there you go. You know how to do it. Yeah. Yeah. OK. All right. Yeah. OK. Is right at the beginning. Then you're sad. Mm hmm. Yeah. OK. All right. All right. Yeah. OK. You convinced me to do it. Thank you. Rounding out the top 10, we've got Daddy's Home 2, Thor Ragnarok, Disaster Artist, Murder on the Orient Express, and a Lady Bird. What if so there was a bird that's also a lady? Larry Bird. Larry, yeah. Good old Larry Bird.
01:01:34
Speaker
You know, Bo Burnham was supposed to play him in winning time, but couldn't because of scheduling. I wish I would have seen that. The guy the guy who played him was really good, but I would have been very interested to see Bo Burnham in that show. I mean, sure. I was probably, you know, locked himself in his house and was, you know, screaming into the screaming into the void. Boy, that was a wild ride that next that one COVID Netflix special that he did. That was that was a wild ride, dude. That's why I've but really, really liked it. Really, really liked it. It was really wild. I haven't seen it, but yeah. Oh, well, check that out. And I'd also like to take this opportunity to say for the millionth time um to HBO Max, to that guy who keeps killing everything at Warner Brothers. Bring back winning times, cowards. Bring it back.
01:02:25
Speaker
Look, we won. Everybody wants it. It got higher ratings in its second season. Let's go. Come on, guys. Finish out the story. Cowards. Just need three more years. cowards I'd watch it. um yeah So as we mentioned before, no box office whatsoever for Bright because it doesn't have one.
Netflix's Claims and Will Smith's Incident
01:02:47
Speaker
Did not exist within that. I will say the approximated budget is somewhere between 90 and 106.2 million dollars, which according to Netflix it may or may not have um
01:03:03
Speaker
succeeded because Netflix basically says every one of their movies. They said that it had been viewed viewed more times in its first week than any other Netflix movie, because every movie they release is the most successful movie of all time. And they can say that because they never have to release their metrics. And they don't. and they sure as shit don't. um The Tomatometer score for Bright is a 26%. The critic's consensus Bright tries to blend fantasy, hard-hitting cop drama and social commentary, and ends up falling painfully short of the mark on all three fronts. Agreed. The Metascore is a 29 based on generally unfavorable reviews from 26 critics. And the Letterbox score. Tucker, you wanna take a crack at it?
01:03:54
Speaker
Oh, I don't think even ah I don't think you could even make a meme review of this and say it's good. So I'm going to say somewhere between two point three and two point seven. Two point three. Got it in. Nailed it. Nailed it. And so took her out of five stars. How are you? Rating David Ayers, twenty seventeen o masterpiece. Bright. It gets one star. It's one and a half for me. One star. Because even the stuff that's good about it sucks because it's being brought down by everything that is around it and none of it's earned.
01:04:40
Speaker
and
01:04:43
Speaker
I just hate this movie so much, Steven. It's awful. yeah I agree with everything you just said. But the one thing that kind of gives it that little extra bump for me is the world building. And I'm a sucker for world building. And I think the world building is one thing this movie actually doesn't do too bad a job with. Like the world they're building is at least somewhat interesting. like But it's not as fleshed out as I would like for it to be. You can tell someone put some thought into some of it. but not enough into the whole of it. So I mean, it's it's like halfway to a good idea kind of a thing, the world building in this movie. Well, in this movie, as far as the world building goes, I think what makes it work so well is that it does a really good job of not having to explain it to you.
01:05:29
Speaker
Exactly. You just kind of see it. You see stuff. You see stuff happening in the background or you'll see some graffiti or, you know, you'll go on this side of town and things will be different. You're like, OK, I kind of get how this world works. But they're not sitting there telling you about it the whole time, which they could have. It would have been just as fucking bad. Right. Just as infuriating and insufferable as the movie already was. Yes. Good Lord. Um, but no, and that's, that's something I like about world building when the world that exists is just one that they, to some degree, I mean, they, they explain enough to where you can understand the plot and what's happening and understand the rules of the world, but they keep enough of it vague that, you know, that someone has put thought into how it works, even if they're not showing it to you.
01:06:16
Speaker
I like that. I love stories that handle that very well. And this one is about halfway to handling it well. Yeah, I would say. God, what a piece of shit. I did not like this movie. Yeah. And, you know, I came into this thinking that maybe it would be one of those movies that everybody hates that I like, but nope. No, no, it's just garbage and not in a fun way. Yeah, turns out it's just bad is what it is. And fuck this movie, dare I say, because I do love me some bad movies. I love me some garbage, but you do. You know, I want to assign do it. I wouldn't say I liked Marmaduke. I would say I didn't hate it. I didn't hate it. Be sure I gave it two stars. You love Marmaduke.
01:07:09
Speaker
I was surprised by Marmaduke is what I was. I mean, yeah, fair. um Yeah. Marmaduke surprised us all in some some of us in very different ways. In various different ways. Oh God. Yeah. I'm glad I never have to watch this movie again or think about it ever again, because I won't. I can pretty much assure you, I will not think about this movie anymore unless it's how do I make this movie more better? How do we erase it from the face of the earth? Oh, Netflix has already done that the day after it came out. Yeah. Netflix release strategies are shit. Yeah. I mean, something swept under the rug. Something could come out. Something I'm really excited for and want to see. And I won't know about it for like a week later.
01:07:55
Speaker
And you know the worst part about it is is that they got rid of their like rating system, you know where it tells you like if people think it's good or not on 100% scale. um That would be very helpful because like there's really good stuff on Netflix. I would love to be able to just cruise around Netflix and find stuff I like. But there's no indication outside of the cast, the director, the description, and the trailer. Right. Nothing else. There's nobody's like, oh, the trailer looks good, but this movie's fucking dumb. Give me some user reviews. Like, give me some actual. Well, I guess there's always letter, not letterbox. Well, I guess there's always like ah rotten tomatoes. Yes, letterboxed.
01:08:40
Speaker
No, that's what that against letterbox dude it's skewed because of the meme reviews, man. Letterboxd totals don't mean anything. That's why I'm so good at predicting them because I know how he's so good at that I know how silly people are on that site. Well, Rotten Tomatoes actually like they take they have the audience score, which is. whatevs and then it has a critic score. And honestly, I like that they're both there because then like if I see that there's a movie on there that I think about, I want to watch um like if they're wildly different, either way, I'm very interested. Like if it has like a 70 percent critic score and like a 12 percent audience score or the exact opposite, I'm fucking there. Show me this movie. I want to know why it's so divisive.
01:09:31
Speaker
I mean, that does sound like you, for sure. Yeah, way into it. Right on. I get that. Hey, that's it. So I'm calling it. That's it. That's it. Let's shut it down. Shut up. Drag this out any longer than we have to. Hey, um this has been the disenfranchised podcast and it's been our episode on Bright. Again, ah maybe we'll come back to the Fresh Prince someday, maybe someday soon. Who can even say um at any rate,
01:10:04
Speaker
I want to do a straight up on six degrees of separation at some point. So he'll definitely be back then. All right. I will put that in for July 31st, 2025. Subject to change, but we will get to it. Oh, yeah, because, you know, people are not talking about that movie and it's really weird because it's the kind of movie that people should still be talking about. like they do other indie movies at that time that are as good or maybe not as good as that movie. There you go. just saying Stalker Channing, dude. Stalker Channing. Donald Sutherland. And Donny Sutherland, yeah, dude. Donny ass, baby. I've read the play, but I've not seen the movie. Yeah, the movie's dope. And the play was really good. I thought about auditioning for it, decided to not to. Yeah, I know. But yeah.
01:11:02
Speaker
Yeah, I will. Your boy Oz Perkins is in that movie. Yeah, I like him because he's real cool and he he makes really cool movies. And also he's Norman Bates. This is his son. Sure is. I always liked Anthony Perkins. You're the only member of the disenfranchised podcast that has not seen long legs yet. That's true. Oh, oh, oh, oh, Steven, I was going to see it last night. Don't you know? I was going to see it last night. But I did not. I'm sorry. Look, that was you. You're looking at me like that was my fault. None of that was my fault. As is not disappointed, directed, disappointment directed at you, Stephen, it's just general disappointment that I didn't get to go see it. I'm sorry, man. I'm sorry. Also, I do want to point out you like Baron Holtz looking a lot like Tucker in this movie.
01:12:00
Speaker
Like he's got a fucking mustache, dude. Who do? Who's that? What? Oh, oh, yes. I don't have that gap, though. No, that's the that's the very distinguishing feature. And he's kind of got goofy eyes. Love him to death. Fantastic actor. But it's got kind of a goofy face for good or ill.
Closing Remarks and Social Engagement
01:12:22
Speaker
I mean, don't look now, Tucker, but
01:12:27
Speaker
Steven, I'm a dime. I'm a snack and you know it. Get the fuck out of here. Not saying you can't be a snack and look goofy, dude. Just saying. I'm throwing that out. I'm putting it on the table. Steven, what I'm saying is if I look goofy, it's because I'm trying to look goofy. OK. You must be trying awful hard all the time, man. Well, I'm my my silliest self when I'm around you, Steven. So that would explain it. Touche. yeah yeah um Yeah, you can find us on most social media. We're a disenfranch pod. I don't know. Figure it out. um if If it looks like we haven't posted there in a couple of years, maybe go somewhere else. um yeah I don't know. Figure it out. i I'm tired. it's It's late. I've had a hell of a week. I'm tired.
01:13:14
Speaker
um Look, we're coming up. What do they tell you? We're coming up on my bedtime right now is what's is what's happening. Oh, oh, shoot. Oh, yeah yeah. You're right. You got to do stuff. You got to do the working things. I've actually I'm actually I lied. I unknowingly lied. I have to be an early tomorrow and I have to actually go into the office. So, ah yeah. time um I have to be there at 7 a.m. Oh, Steven. Yeah. Oh, oh. I haven't done that in a long, long ass time. So yeah. Okay. So you can go to our Patreons, patreon.com slash different French pod and check us out there and like.
01:13:53
Speaker
like leave your comments there because it's the official conversation of disenfranchised and also hey i haven't forgot about those were watching episodes i'm gonna drop them in a big ol batch before we record the next one i'm gonna do it it's gonna happen it might happen tomorrow but probably not because i'm gonna be editing this bullshit uh... also you can find steven on some things at chewy rawl walrus and that brett might still have a letterbox but i'm not sure uh... and if you can't find uh... me on on instagram at ice 909 and also youtube at ice 909 that's i c e and i in need the number zero and the number nine also tuck mugs look tuck underscore mugs i know we haven't dropped anything in a month but i got some things planned we're working on stuff the wheels are spinning don't give up something will happen soon i promise uh and that's it that was amazing thank you
01:14:47
Speaker
Uh, so yeah, this is Ben's disenfranchised podcast episode on Bright. Uh, I'm your host, Stephen Foxworthy from my co-host Tucker and the absent Brett Wright. Until next time, do fairy lives matter? Let us know in the comments. Peace. Goodbye.
01:15:26
Speaker
you