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Stop Adding, Start Releasing: New Year Rituals That Actually Work
27 Plays2 months ago
This is the unconventional new year prep you actually need: releasing what no longer serves you before you add anything new.
Here's what we're exploring about letting go rituals:
- What to release: limiting beliefs, toxic relationships, old habits, grudges, past failures - things emotionally tied to your self-concept
- Burning ceremony ritual: write it down, safely burn it, watch it physically release (turns intangible mental stuff into tangible release)
- Forgiveness practice: daily meditation releasing anger toward yourself (feminine rage about other stuff can stay)
- Physical decluttering: releasing emotional baggage attached to items (that post-depression clean energy)
- Mental release: constant reminders you're not that limiting belief and you're capable of achieving great things
From doing forgiveness meditation daily for months to learning that being introverted isn't something to fix, this episode challenges you to stop focusing only on what to add and start with what to release.
These things literally hold you back from reaching goals and feeling joy. Think about how amazing you'll feel once you truly release them. That's what you're stopping yourself from achieving by holding on.
Create space for growth, new opportunities, and positive energy by letting go first. Sometimes it's therapy or coaching. Sometimes it's a burning ceremony or decluttering your closet and facing what items represent emotionally.
Subscribe. Share. Remember to release before you restart.
Small steps, big healing. Keep growing! ✨
Join the conversation! What are you releasing before 2025? DM me on Instagram @YourCoachMari - let's do this together!
Related Episode: Ep138 - Thankful for Growth (reframing past failures)
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Transcript
Introduction to the Growing With Soul Podcast
00:00:00
Speaker
Hello beautiful souls and welcome back to another installment of the Growing With Soul podcast where we explore the moments and stories that shape who we're becoming. I'm Marisol and this is where I love to have real conversations about growth, self-discovery, and learning to put yourself first.
00:00:17
Speaker
Whether we're diving into books that change our perspective or unpacking personal experiences that teach us something new, this podcast is for women who are done playing small and ready to embrace their own journey.
00:00:30
Speaker
If you've struggled with putting everyone else first or battled self-doubt, you're in the right place. This isn't about perfection. It's about the messy, beautiful process of growing into yourself.
00:00:43
Speaker
So come grow with me.
Rethinking New Year Approaches
00:00:45
Speaker
In today's episode, we're going to be taking a little bit of an unconventional look at the but but the potential at the new year. i was going to say the potential new year. Girl, we're going to have a new year. oh my God. um So a little bit of an unconventional approach to the new year.
00:01:02
Speaker
It's December. And when we get to December, I know we all start to think about all the different things that we're going to be doing in the coming year. All the great things, all the amazing and fun things that we're going to do, all the amazing and wonderful ways that we're going to be different and grow and be quote unquote better. And it's, one, can be a lot. It can definitely be a lot. But I think what we also can do during this time instead of just thinking about how things are going to be different, how things are going to be better, how we're going to be different, how we're going to grow and how we're going to have all these wonderful new habits and goals and all that fun stuff.
Creating Space for Growth and Opportunities
00:01:45
Speaker
We also can take a look at what about the things that that we're going to choose to not bring in into the new year with us.
00:01:56
Speaker
What about those things? What are the things that we can let go of that we can just leave behind instead? So in this episode, we're going to talk about that. And we're going to talk about the different ways in which we can pinpoint what those things are and what we can do to really set the intention of creating more space for ourselves by letting these things go and creating that space for growth, for new opportunities, and for just positive energy in general.
00:02:29
Speaker
So you want to let some stuff go. But you're not really sure what to let go, what to let go of. Or maybe it feels like you have to let go of everything. There's just so much. But trying to let go of everything is not going to be a productive way of going about it.
00:02:47
Speaker
And also you want to be able to be strategic. You don' want to utilize your energy well. So you need to be strategic about it.
Identifying Obstacles to Growth
00:02:55
Speaker
So let's definitely talk about what are some common things that can get in the way of us reaching our full potentials, having the healthiest relationship with ourselves, or maybe having the healthiest relationship with others or reaching our goals.
00:03:09
Speaker
What are some common things that get in the way of those things? Liberty beliefs. Those are a huge, huge one. Toxic relationships. We've talked about that a lot, but usually the aftermath of them.
00:03:22
Speaker
old habits and grudges that maybe you're holding onto, and just like we talked about in the previous episode, our past failures. These are all things that are very emotionally tied and often very much emotionally tied to our self-concept, tied to how we view ourselves, how we view ourselves and our position in relation to other people in our lives, how we view ourselves in relation to the world in general, sort of our place in life.
00:03:53
Speaker
So it's not easy to just let go of these things. Limiting beliefs literally hold us back from achieving the things that we want, whether that be a goal that we have that is maybe career-centered, financially-centered, maybe it's a personal goal, or maybe it's limiting beliefs when it comes to dating, limiting beliefs when it comes to how you feel about yourself, maybe academically,
00:04:23
Speaker
Those things, even though they are a bit, well, they're very, they are intangible. so even though they are intangible, they have very real consequences.
00:04:34
Speaker
Toxic relationships are going to be a little bit more complicated, potentially, depending on the type of relationship it is. But if there is a toxic relationship in your life, examine that. And is it possible to turn things around?
00:04:47
Speaker
If not, how can we exit gracefully? Look at, like I mentioned before, old habits, maybe grudges that you're holding. Are there certain behaviors or patterns of thinking that are consistently hindering you from moving forward?
00:05:06
Speaker
Are they holding you back in some kind of a way? And what is it that you could potentially do to... sort of rewrite the neuropathways there so that you are no longer doing these old habits or holding onto these old grudges.
00:05:22
Speaker
If you are curious about how to reframe past failures that are still holding you back, definitely visit last week's episode. I did an entire episode about that. So...
00:05:35
Speaker
This is, again, like I don't typically come on this podcast, like, if there's something I'm not familiar with or haven't done myself, I'm going to have a guest on. But when it comes to letting go and finding ways to let go of things that no
Personal Experiences with Limiting Beliefs
00:05:50
Speaker
longer serve you. I've done this a lot.
00:05:52
Speaker
and go I feel it feels like there is still so much more for me to let go of in order for me to continue moving forward. And it's been an interesting balance throughout my life, figuring out what are things that are just who I am and then what are things that I truly can let go of.
00:06:12
Speaker
One of the things that I had to really learn that I can't just let go of is that I'm an introvert. I am an extremely introverted person. And that is just not something that is ever going to change. Growing up, it was it definitely felt like it was something that was wrong.
00:06:28
Speaker
Being introverted, being quiet, being... um Now that I have the word for it overstimulated by a lot of people and loud places, it was always made to feel like it was wrong that I was that way and that I should be more outgoing. i should be more talkative. I should be louder and more extroverted.
00:06:50
Speaker
Over the years, i have finally come to accept that this is just who I am. i get anxious and overwhelmed. And I sort of, you know, cocoon into myself in like loud crowded spaces.
00:07:03
Speaker
And that's just who I am. And that's never going to change. In the moment, if the occasion rises for me to... Or the occasion calls for me to rise above that and I have to like perform beyond maybe I'm speaking or I'm participating an event. Then like, okay, I need to for the moment, overcome that like instinct to just cocoon into myself. But I will be exhausted, thoroughly exhausted by the end of the event, the end of the day. And that's just...
00:07:32
Speaker
who I am. In comparison to other limiting beliefs that I have had to work through and that I am currently working through, I've come to realize that I do have a lot of limiting beliefs around like my jujitsu, for example.
00:07:48
Speaker
There's a lot of backstory there that I'm not going to get into in this episode. But there is, there are, I have limiting beliefs around my jujitsu, my ability to jujitsu, my performance, my athleticism, all of that.
00:08:01
Speaker
And they are sneaky and conniving. And it is a constant practice letting them go. Because sometimes with limiting beliefs, they're deeply rooted. They're deeply rooted. Those neural pathways are deeply rooted. So it takes practice in order to truly be rid of them.
00:08:21
Speaker
But definitely take some time to think about what those things are for you, whether it's limiting beliefs, whether it's behaviors, relationships, um or maybe even grudges if you're the type of person to hold them.
00:08:33
Speaker
So what is the benefit ultimately of releasing these things? One, like I already alluded to, they hold you back. they They stop you from reaching your goals. They stop you from essentially having the life that you want. And to an extent, I would say, either directly or indirectly through those things, they're stopping you from feeling joy and happiness.
Methods for Releasing Obstacles
00:08:57
Speaker
Think about how amazing you're going to feel. Once you are able to truly release yourself of these things, think about how proud of yourself you'll be when you reach your goals and you get to that place.
00:09:11
Speaker
That's what you're stopping yourself from achieving by holding on to these things. So what are some ways that we can release these things from our lives? um There are a myriad of ways. Some of it is going to be your more like traditional healing process, depending on what we're dealing with here.
00:09:29
Speaker
Sometimes it does call for therapy, coaching, somatic therapy and coaching. Like sometimes it's going to be that. Other times it might call for something a little bit more tangible as well.
00:09:43
Speaker
So for me, i'll I'll definitely tell you that the way that I typically practice releasing things from my life, the main one is more internal and definitely an intangible one where practice constantly remind myself that I am not that thing and that I am capable and that I'm capable of achieving great things, that I'm capable of overcoming obstacles. Because that tends to be the common thread amongst my limiting beliefs. um
00:10:17
Speaker
And then specifically when it comes to jujitsu, there is that one as well, variations of that one. But it's a constant reminder and a constant reminder that I've achieved and overcome difficult things in the past so I can do it again.
00:10:35
Speaker
One of the other ones that came up while I was outlining this and looking for release rituals that are commonly practiced um was a birding ceremony, which in reading about this, I remembered that my high school did this. so let me get into it. So essentially a birding ceremony is a practice in which you write down the thing that you want to release.
00:10:57
Speaker
and write on a little piece of paper and in a safe way in a safe capacity you burn it okay i don't want anybody i don't want anybody starting any fires that get out of hand okay especially mean nowhere i want nowhere but i am in california and we already had a rough year with that so let's let's be safe about this okay So tiny piece of paper, tiny little candle near a sink or something. Okay.
00:11:23
Speaker
If this is something that you feel like would really be beneficial. And essentially when we do this, I think it feels like very cathartic to see it burn. You know, like you see it burn up and dissipate and disappear. It turns into like the ash and the smoke and then it's gone and released from your life. And you see the smoke wafting away. um And it feels like a very, it turns an intangible thing, like a mental thing in your mind.
00:11:48
Speaker
into a very physical release. So where I usually, for example, like I gave before, I usually do like a mental intangible release, just internally allow myself to just let things go. This is a very physical way of letting something go that is internal. And like I mentioned, I remember my high school did this. So I went to a college preparatory school. i am a millennial. So as a millennial, everybody and their mama told us that go to college, get a good job. You're going to be set.
00:12:19
Speaker
Joke's on us. That's not true. But given that and the fact that I went to a college preparatory school, everybody was like high strung and very stressed about their college acceptances. So one of the things that my high school did, we had like a fire pit thing.
00:12:39
Speaker
on campus. I don't know why it was never utilized except for this, but we did. um And there was one day where basically like all of the, I think, yeah, we were seniors. So all of the seniors could bring in their rejection letters, which they probably, oh my God, am I old? They probably just send out emails now the high school students that get rejected. back in the day,
00:13:05
Speaker
Back in my day, they sent us physical letters basically being like, and that's how you knew you didn't get accepted because if you got accepted, you got a giant package. But if you weren't accepted, you just got like a tiny envelope, ah like a letter saying that you weren't admitted into the university. So our school told us for all of us to bring in our rejection letters so that we can like burn them in the fire pit.
00:13:26
Speaker
So... That was our own little release ceremony. um So do that safely if that feels like it resonates with you.
The Role of Forgiveness in Healing
00:13:37
Speaker
One that I've talked about as well that I've done as part of my healing journey is forgiveness and having a forgiveness practice. So one of the things that I...
00:13:49
Speaker
didn't know that I was holding on to was a lot of anger towards myself in my healing journey, which crazy. i probably should have known that given how much I hated myself, but there was a lot of anger there.
00:14:08
Speaker
So as part of my healing journey, I did a forgiveness meditation every day for, I don't even remember how long, a few months probably. And through that, through that forgiveness meditation, i was able to let go of that anger towards myself. And let's be real.
00:14:29
Speaker
I got to have feminine rage about a lot of other things, okay? The feminine rage is still there, but the anger towards myself is gone. And that's what counts. um So forgiveness meditation is definitely one way to let go of things. Maybe a forgiveness practice through journaling or some other type of exercise.
00:14:48
Speaker
I definitely want to emphasize forgiving yourself for things because again, and we talk about relationships a lot on this podcast and the most important relationship that you can have is the one with yourself and that is going to dictate every single other relationship that you have. Like every friendship that you have, the relationship that you have with your family, like you need to forgive yourself first and make sure that you are good with you.
00:15:18
Speaker
before moving on. If it does involve others as well, this forgiveness practice, that's what needs to, we need to focus on. Do that as well. Okay. Make sure it's you and then move on to other people.
00:15:32
Speaker
It definitely creates an emotional freedom. You feel so much more space inside of yourself when you finally release that and truly have that acceptance in the forgiveness. There is this beautiful sense of freedom and possibility when you are able to truly forgive and to release in that way.
00:15:55
Speaker
Another common one that I like to do that I was really happy to see pop up was physical decluttering.
Emotional Release through Decluttering
00:16:03
Speaker
And that is one that I really experienced, especially coming out of depression. and I feel like anybody who's been depressed can really relate to like that like post-depression clean that you do.
00:16:18
Speaker
Like, i remember one time i cleaned my room after going through, like, a really, like, steep, like, depression, depressive episode. Like, I had had plates on my bed. I had, I emotionally ate an entire Ben & Jerry's pint of, like, chocolate something.
00:16:35
Speaker
it was on my bed for days. And, like, I finally, like, being able to clean that up, that declutter my space after a depressive episode is so just, like...
00:16:49
Speaker
There's something so like releasing, for lack of a better word, when it comes to that. So if you've ever been depressed and you know that post-depression clean, that's that's that feeling we're going for here. You know, and when we when we declutter,
00:17:05
Speaker
we are able to assess and look at things differently.
00:17:10
Speaker
that we are emotionally tied to. Because for a lot of us, physical things hold lot of emotional and sentimental value. So when we are ah going about really decluttering, we're not thinking, do I keep this? What do i do with this? So where can I put it? Do I give it away? Do I sell it? Do I throw it away?
00:17:28
Speaker
and In that process, we have to truly face what that physical thing represents for us. Say it's something your ex gave you. And it's like, oh, this has been in the back of my closet for like a year now.
00:17:45
Speaker
Do I keep this? Do I get rid of it?
00:17:52
Speaker
You get to make that call. Do you release that in that way? I know that growing up, my like my sister, my cousin, like my mom would talk about like after breakup, you like put all the stuff they gave you in a box and like just put it in a box, get it out of your face and like put it away.
00:18:09
Speaker
And like eventually you just throw things away. i don' That's what I've done. I've eventually just thrown things away. So there is that.
00:18:20
Speaker
But as you're cleaning out your closet, you're cleaning out your room, reorganizing your space, you get to reevaluate what you have and if it's still serving you and bringing you any kind of joy. The Marie Kondo way, I suppose. Does it spark joy? If not, chuck it out or donate it give it away. Maybe somebody else can find use for it um in this economy.
00:18:43
Speaker
You know, help someone out if someone else can benefit from that thing. um But by decluttering, we sometimes release whatever emotional baggage is attached to that item.
00:18:55
Speaker
And that is a beautiful thing to feel.
Looking Forward to Achieving 2026 Goals
00:19:00
Speaker
So ultimately, as we are going into the new year and you're thinking about like, what are the goals and amazing things that I want to achieve and do in 2026? Also think about what are some of the things that you can release before moving into the new year?
00:19:14
Speaker
If this episode resonated with you, thank you so much for sticking around and engaging with it.
Engagement and Support Invitation
00:19:21
Speaker
Don't forget to give it a like and to subscribe to the podcast. If it did resonate with you, definitely leave a positive review as it helps get this out to more people who need to hear the message.
00:19:31
Speaker
If you are looking for some extra support in this process, I am currently accepting clients and you can schedule your very own discovery call with me in the show notes. Until next time, keep growing.