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There's No Such Thing As Free Oysters Rockefeller
71 Plays3 years ago
A conversation about Joey Janella doing karaoke turns into a much longer conversation about Hogan's Hangout and Brian Knobbs that you don't want to miss!
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Transcript
Introduction and Hosts
00:00:35
Speaker
Hey everybody, welcome to another episode of Predetermined, a Pro Wrestling Hangout. I'm your host, Garrett Callender, and with me, as always, Chris Miggs and Jimmy Fax.
Garrett's Sickness and Wrestling Experience
00:00:42
Speaker
Glad to be here. Are you? Well, I am. No, I was feeling, we were talking about recording last night and I was feeling really, really under the weather. It was actually, it was very weird.
00:00:56
Speaker
Brief thing kind of came over me, no symptoms other than kind of feeling achy and fevery. And so I went to bed kind of early last night, but I wasn't ready to go to sleep right away. So I put on a playlist I'd made of just Appalachian matches in the BW3. And as my brain, as I like faded in and out of consciousness, like from the fever and tiredness, I just let,
00:01:22
Speaker
the BW three parking lot wash over me, and it was honestly a beautiful experience. I'm not exactly sure how many how much of the many hours of Appalachian played on my television. I actually watched, but I liked all of it. It's that it's quite a dreamscape. Just, you know, that's where I want all my dreams to happen. The place the dreams are made of.
Memorable Wrestling Characters
00:01:51
Speaker
Do you remember anything, like any single match, any face you saw, a character in the crowd, a specific chair you wish you were sitting in at the Buffalo Wild Wings? There were a couple, so I have these images of yelling older women. Toothless Ruth. Toothless Ruth. There was a woman in a tie-dye shirt.
00:02:19
Speaker
that said like my blood type is iced coffee, which respect, respect. That's the one who loves her iced coffee. We're getting three of those shirts and we're wearing them to the Buffalo wild ones. I'm into it.
Unexpected Matches and Chaos
00:02:35
Speaker
I know I watched a Calvin Tankman versus Rhino match.
00:02:40
Speaker
Really in an Appalachian. Mm hmm. That is not a match I would have expected to be on Appalachian. Yeah. Yeah. That's a and it was this the main event. No, it was in the middle of the show, actually, I think. Wow. They said at some point we were going to wait for later, but we got to do it right now. I mean, that match happens on the impact zone. It's happening later than the middle of the show.
00:03:07
Speaker
That's a Joey Ryan spot. That was the, if I can get done before intermission, you can pay me less spot. Yeah. Yeah, they were using people's chairs.
00:03:19
Speaker
Like the chairs people had brought, they were hitting people with them. I think they broke someone's cooler. I hope someone got paid 20 bucks for that, or 15, or whatever. Fuck. This is actually making me scared. Can we bring our own beers to this parking lot? Should I bring a cooler? We're gonna spike some iced coffees. Let's be clear, we're gonna put a heavy amount of West Virginia gin in some iced coffees.
00:03:49
Speaker
and buffalo chips. Well, they won't let you bring that in. You've got to get your buffalo flavored things from the Buffalo Wild Wings. That's the only thing Buffalo Wild Wings requires. No, I can't bring an air fryer and be just, you know, making our own batches of wings. Why would I want to? They're delicious and they're right behind us.
Indie Wrestling vs Major Events
00:04:10
Speaker
That's how they get into American cheeseburger territory, right? If you're just trying stuff that close to the violence,
00:04:19
Speaker
I've never had the luxury of having a full indie tankman experience. I've seen them at what are technically indie shows, but the big New York area and Chicago area, the GCWs, they're not really indie shows. Whereas Appalachian, that's the real indies. I think I would love
00:04:41
Speaker
the tank men, real indie experience. He seems like he's kind of really cut for that territory era, you know, whooping some ass. Are we ever going to get tank men versus beast man? Oh, it's got to happen
Sleep Paralysis and Wrestling Fears
00:04:58
Speaker
now. Now I can think of nothing else. I think that may have happened. I see faxes hit the dark web trying to find it.
00:05:09
Speaker
I'm looking I'm going through the back door and the Jimmy Jimmy Lloyd back door to the dark web. Do not go to the Jimmy Lloyd back door. I feel like it's possible I saw that match on Fight Plus somewhere. Was it while you were in your dream shape? That's a great question. Unclear. By the way, when you Google search, Google is that that's what I check Google and then I go to the dark web, which is big, of course, as we've covered on the podcast.
00:05:37
Speaker
which is just Google search tank man, beast man. The autocraft says, do you mean tank space man, Batman? Which kinda now, yeah, I do wanna know why the people are doing tank man, Batman things. Cause that also sounds fun, but that's for a different podcast.
00:05:58
Speaker
I was worried that you were gonna say, you know, like, I had a fever, I hit my playlist, and then I just felt completely incapacitated. I couldn't move my hands. I was almost stuck in a, um, fuck, what do you, what do you call that, that sleep cycle where you can't move? Do you know what I'm talking about?
00:06:21
Speaker
Uh, not, not lucid dreaming. Oh yeah. Yeah. The, um, it's, uh, man, it's like, they made that documentary about it. Um, it's like where your parallel, it's like sleep paralysis, sleep paralysis. There you go. So yeah, I was worried that you hit a stage of sleep paralysis and realized you accidentally hit the grim stoico playlist and now you're stuck with your eyes
Tankman vs Beastman Discovery
00:06:44
Speaker
open. The dark man is coming over. You're going to slit your throat, but first you got to watch 10 hours of this shit.
00:06:50
Speaker
He's still popping up, guys. My algorithm is so fucked. It's like, do you want to watch last night's Seth Meyers? And then when that ends, it immediately goes like, hey, it's Grim Stoyko!
00:07:06
Speaker
So my sources, by the way, have found so they have appeared in two battle riots together, but there has been, from what I'm seeing, there has been a Tankman Beastman singles match on July 24th, 2021 at the pale pro state of emergency in Arlington, Texas.
00:07:33
Speaker
Yeah, I think I really think that's on fight plus if I, if you Google it, if you dig into the fight plus archives, which of course is basically the dark web.
Brutal Match Descriptions
00:07:42
Speaker
Right. I hopped into the dark web last night and I finally for, I don't know why this took me so long because this is a match from January, but I finally watched MAGA Butcher versus Schlack for that XPW title. Oh dear.
00:08:00
Speaker
What did they do to each other, Garrett? So it was, um, let's see, there was no, uh, there, no mats. So it was exposed boards, no ropes.
00:08:12
Speaker
barbed wire, panes of glass, it starts with them brawling around, Schlack pulls out a prison shiv, like a shake, and is stabbing Magga Butcher in the head until the point when it kind of does that John Moxley, evil uno spurt, where he's like got a good spurt going. They make it back into the ring.
00:08:36
Speaker
Schlack is on the ground and gives Magga the double kick from the ground to push him back. He goes so hard into that barbed wire that he basically just explodes through it and hits the ground. Absolutely not a thing that was supposed to happen as far as I could tell. He looked a little fucked up. So naturally they had to send three other guys in to fight Schlack, one of which is the hardcore hillbilly.
00:09:02
Speaker
who if you are a slap fighting enthusiast like me, you recognize for fucking slap fight. Magga Butcher's fucking guy he comes to the ring with is a slap fighter. That makes so much sense. Of course, XPW would house some slap fighters.
Schlack's Persona
00:09:20
Speaker
Well, I just anywhere that would I'm just let anyone any anything that lets Delph boy around also has slap fighters on hand. Just those those things do seem like there's some good synergy. Has Delph boy wrestled the hardcore hillbilly? I mean, he absolutely has to have didn't we? We just saw a clip, though, of Slack beating the fuck out of Delph boy. Did you watch that this week? Oh, that was something.
00:09:51
Speaker
That was, yeah, facts, you missed out on this. I think it was in our group Instagram thread somewhere. It's when I lost my phone for two days. It's just in there. Oh, it was on the Instagram, on the Instagram. Okay. It was on the Instagram. It was from somebody's cell phone on Twitter. And Schlack is head button. He is working Dilfboy over.
00:10:10
Speaker
He I mean, he took his noodles. He did something. There's a power. There's a there's a quote unquote power bomb through a door that's basically just Slack, just like ramming him head first through it. Well, it didn't break the first time, if I recall. So Slack had like he doesn't want to look weak. He's fighting the weirdest little guy.
00:10:34
Speaker
Dilfoy should be somebody's little guy. What was the finish? My favorite part is the finish. It's a Boston crab. So Dilfoy is basically like mid-90s Mikey Whipperack, only without the talent, charisma or push. Yes. What year do you think... I mean, it had to have been 1960, the last time somebody won with a Boston crab.
00:11:05
Speaker
Well, Rick Martell, he was using it. The late eighties, even in the, maybe into the nineties Martell was, was winning matches with the, with the Boston crap. I mean, Jericho. Yeah. I mean, the walls of Jericho is basically a bit of Boston crap for the better part of 23 or 24 years.
00:11:21
Speaker
And that UFC fighter used the walls of Jericho in that match and actually won a real fight with the walls of Jericho. But that was the lion tamer, wasn't it? It was like the high version where you could actually like break their neck and spine, like where you're really twerking on them. OK, but I can't let this MAGA butcher match go just yet. So.
00:11:46
Speaker
Magga's gone through the barbed wire, is hurt on the ground, and now Schlack has to fight like three, two guys and a lady. The first guy that comes in to fight him, Schlack removes his shirt and his pants, and he is just in tidy whiteys, which, or I'm sorry, like he's in like black trunk, not even trunks, they are underpants, but they're black.
00:12:07
Speaker
And I have to. Slack strikes me as the type of guy that like he hasn't wore white undies in quite a number of years. Like he he's made that mistake. Oh, Slack's pants are on. He removed the other guy's pants. Yeah, Slack didn't like call an audible and take his own pants off.
00:12:25
Speaker
That is the way I thought you described it. And I was hoping you'd explain how it got there. And then I was also like, I'm good if just there's no expo. Basically Schlack was like, I don't know what to do. I better fuck this guy.
00:12:44
Speaker
So he beats that guy up, a lady comes in, he ends up kind of gorilla pressing her over his head. Her ass is hanging out like it's ECW in the 90s. He throws her over the barbed wire into these two guys. And then he throws a pane of glass down at MAGA Butcher, but it does not break. So a man that's hurt also just gets thudded with just a giant sheet of glass.
00:13:14
Speaker
in this whole match, his guys or Magga's guys are beating up Schlack and he's having to take everybody on and eventually Masada comes out. And do you remember when the Rock did the baseball swing of the chair to Ken Shamrock? Masada did that to Magga Butcher.
00:13:33
Speaker
And that caused Schlack to win. And after the match, Magga gets on the microphone and complains about how Schlack had cheated, which I think is brilliant storytelling because it very much fits the character of Magga Butcher, who has been cheating the entire match to complain that his opponent did in fact cheat to win.
00:13:58
Speaker
It was love it. It was beautiful. Honest to God, had a great time. I was watching the King's Road matches and went straight into that. It was a nice little afternoon. That's that's the praise that Rob Black's been looking for because he's a big all Japan fan. Well, I was just thinking we just need to get Eddie Kingston to American Cheeseburger and bring these worlds together. Yeah. Ooh. Yeah. And Eddie's fine with being in his underwear in the ring. That's totally he's.
00:14:28
Speaker
You only take your pants off if MAGA Butcher gets hurt and you don't know what else to do. I'm just imagining the like Rob Black calling the audible and he thinks he's screaming like fuck him up Schlack and Schlack just hears the fuck him.
Cultural Appropriation in Wrestling
00:14:48
Speaker
And he's like, it's Rob Black. He must be, he must, I'll trust him. Well, and we know from like the interest of everything, like, like Slack is definitely drinking that XPW Kool-Aid. He loves it there. So if Rob Black tells him to fuck a dude, he fucks a dude. That's just how it works. There's an alternate universe somewhere where when Shane McMahon blows his quad, that Snoop Dogg just gets in the ring and starts masturbating.
00:15:18
Speaker
Alright, Snoop, take the miss' pants off. Later there's a dark side of the ring where the miss is like suddenly a multi-platinum recording artist has my pants down in front of 60,000 people. Yet this is the most over I've been in years.
00:15:46
Speaker
Tell them is, there is no bad press. Tell that to Rob Black. Yes. Well, I haven't made a drink yet and what are you drinking, Chris? I'm drinking an athletic brew. Just enjoying a little beer. Well, I was digging around my fridge and I came across this bad boy.
00:16:15
Speaker
So I figured I'm not done with these Mountain Dew pitch blacks. They won't go away. They actually just multiply if you leave them in the fridge long enough. And I'm going to pour a little whiskey into. They're like a mountain. I mean, that's that's what it's for. Whiskey Mountain Dew. Is that what pitch black is? I thought pitch black was existed solely for a WrestleMania match or Royal Rumble, man. Yeah.
00:16:45
Speaker
Um, sure. I don't know. My wife actually bought me a wrestling themed food product this last week. Oh, yeah. She got me the luchadores version of Cinnamon Toast Crunch. I didn't know there was such a thing and now I must have it. Yeah. What is it and how is it and why is it?
00:17:10
Speaker
So it says, it claims that the luchador or the cinnamon toast crunch, they have put cinnamon, like luchador masks on each individual piece, which seems like an absolute waste of time, but it did sell a box of cereal. So the faces don't look like lucha masks. Yay, cultural appropriation and marketing. You know,
00:17:38
Speaker
Are the Cinnamon Toast Crunch, are they going to get cancelled? I mean, I don't know. I mean, it seems like it there. Are they are they donating any of this money to to the people of Mexico? You know, is there any tie in here? Is anyone in CMLL getting a payday out of this? Is Mil Muertes going to get any bit of this Cinnamon Toast Crunch money?
00:18:02
Speaker
I'm trying to figure out how maggot butcher is going to feel about this. Like would he be offended that there's like a Mexican wrestling or would he be happy because he can eat the Mexican wrestlers? I think he's unhappy because I think the strong implication would be that.
00:18:22
Speaker
wherever Garrett's wife got this is clearly getting their supply illegally from the other side of the border. This is just the normal cinnamon toast crunch in Mexico and then made with toxic chemicals and then someone snuck it over the border. Which by the way also means
00:18:45
Speaker
that people, honest Americans, making honest breakfasts aren't getting a dime of that money, because you're getting your illegal money, it's ruining the country. It's a breakfast of lies. It's a breakfast of strife and misery, and that's why we need that wall, that wall that's been up for years and years. I mean, the thing is, you build the wall, the cereal's just gonna come in illegally,
00:19:15
Speaker
I think we just need a path for legal luchador cereal because I think- I don't mind luchador cereal if it goes through the proper channels to get here. Exactly. Exactly. It can vote in the mascot Olympics or whatever. One of the good ones.
00:19:40
Speaker
Of course. Just speaking of mascots, this is a weird thing. So you know, I used to work at Warner Brothers and I trained all the tour guides. And I've been seeing in my Instagram, a guy that I trained liking some of my shit. And I noticed he had a blue check mark. And I was like, why Instagram, you can't pay for that. How did he get the blue check mark? What is he doing? He is now the Boston, he's the Patriots mascot.
00:20:07
Speaker
Did you know if you're inside the suit, you get a blue check mark? And he goes, and it's not like the mascots Instagram. It's his Instagram with like his personal. Yeah. I didn't know that. I gotta follow up on that. I obviously now we all need to see what we got to do. Mayor boot and better have one. Yeah. Of course you're talking about Chris. Yeah.
00:20:35
Speaker
I do not have, I'm not blue verified yet. I tried to give Mark
Wrestlers on Social Media
00:20:42
Speaker
Zuckerberg the money. I didn't want to give, I'm not going to give Elon Musk money, but I tried to give Mark Zuckerberg the money to get me verified on Instagram and he just, he wouldn't take it. Now I can tell you I'm checking the dark web to see what wrestlers have real accounts that do not have blue check marks. So they rank below the guy in the Patriots costume
00:21:05
Speaker
personal account. While you do that, I'm curious, Garrett, how is the drink the second time around?
00:21:16
Speaker
So this time, what did I use last time? Last time I was using the screwball peanut butter whiskey. So I never did it with just a regular whiskey and I'm still not, because I looked in our liquor cabinet and we were out of regular whiskey, but I did find this little bottle of Tennessee honey whiskey. Oh, that might work. And it's, yeah, I mean, this is perfectly drinkable.
00:21:41
Speaker
This is interesting. I still like if you try and drink pitch black by itself, you're going to pass out in a bed, wake up in some sort of stupor that doesn't your body can't move and be watching Grimstoyco with this. You know, I could drive a car right now. Oh.
00:22:01
Speaker
Um, cause that's, it's interesting. I'm wondering what our next one's going to be. Cause I, you know, we never talked about it on the podcast. Um, so you made that drink at the Royal Rumble during WrestleMania. I made a Snoop Dogg drink themed drink because I have thanks to facts, a wonderful birthday gift from a year or so ago, Snoop Dogg's vodka.
00:22:21
Speaker
It's a strawberry vodka. No, sorry, gin. It's a strawberry gin, and I mixed it with a raspberry and lime spinny, a spin drift, but it's a spinny, of course, for the spinner belt that he loves so much. And it was a delightful combination. I really enjoyed WrestleMania right up until the point where they fucked us, but, you know, whatever. Right until the point that Schlack called an audible.
00:22:49
Speaker
That's how we wanted to get a job with the vids. Slack, I need you to go out there and penetrate him.
00:23:00
Speaker
For Cody. That's how Cody has to end his story. Cody, the story's no good unless you get fucked by Schlack. What do you mean? Do you mean Schlack's gonna cost me a title shot? No. No, Monday Night Raw's not gonna be alive. We're gonna blur it all. We're gonna film it in Saudi.
00:23:26
Speaker
No condom. He's not going to use so much as spit, Cody. It's going to be dry. You're going to bleed. He signed the contract. You can have some of my dick cocaine before you go out there. It'll numb the pain. It's a hero's journey. You know, you kind of you got to get bottom. How many years is this story?
00:23:57
Speaker
Well, it takes at least six months to recover from flag fucking you like that. Just physically, right? Like enough to like not have one of those like donuts on your computer desk chair. Cody's ass is going to look like his peck. I mean, that's seven months for someone with a vagina. So I can't even imagine Cody how long it might be.
00:24:21
Speaker
Cody sitting on that donut and he missed the private plane out. So he's on that commercial flight that the authorities have stopped on the runway. He's been sitting on this donut for eight hours before takeoff. Oh, somebody recognizes him. Some little kid like, oh, did you get hurt in a wrestling match? She's like, kind of kind of. Kind of. I can't really talk about it without an adult present.
00:24:50
Speaker
So by the way, I checked on the blue check marks, right? So I just did four names. So I know Beastman doesn't have one because I stalk his gram, of course. But I check, of course, where I start with anything related to wrestlers. I start with Jimmy Lloyd. Jimmy Lloyd, no blue check mark. OK. Not a huge shock. Although a famous actor in addition to the wrestling. So maybe a little bit. I would have thought the Bobby D stuff alone would have done it. Yeah. Who else doesn't have one? John Malkovich?
00:25:22
Speaker
Then I checked. The leader of our gang, Nick Gage. No blue check mark. Nick motherfucking Gage. The man had a dark side of the ring on real TV.
00:25:38
Speaker
No blue check mark. So then I go, OK, OK. Let me go back to someone that I'm I'm pretty sure I don't do like Jericho or something. Let me do. So I did just because, you know, we were talking about him last week for obvious reasons. I went with Roddy Strong. Roddy Strong. Blue check mark. He's got the blue check mark. OK, OK, OK. So like, OK, my system isn't broken here. Right. OK, right. So then I checked one last name and this is somebody who I will give you spoiler. They have a blue check mark.
00:26:08
Speaker
So this is someone who's up there with Roddy Strong and the guy inside the Patriots suits personal account. So in terms of fame, apparently above Jimmy Lloyd and even Nick motherfucking Gage, a blue check mark belongs to the Fuego del Sol.
00:26:29
Speaker
So I don't know how deep into like the dark elevation bench you need to be to get that blue check mark, but apparently, I don't know, Zuck, I guess doesn't watch GCW. Well, I mean, you know, the guy I worked with, he's what every other week entertaining a stadium with tens of thousands of people in it and going to like grocery store openings and shit.
00:26:54
Speaker
Yeah, but just to be clear, Roddy Strong's personal account doesn't have the check mark. It's the wrestling character. I don't think he was born Roddy Strong. I don't know his real name off the top of my head, but I'm pretty sure his mother didn't name him Roderick Strong in the birth certificate.
00:27:13
Speaker
But I don't know, now let's come up with who's the most random Sky Blue. I guess she's on AEW a lot now. Sky Blue has a blue check mark. Okay. This has nothing to do with this, but did you happen to see any of the clips of Sawyer Reckover in Japan doing the Joshi stuff?
Sawyer Reck in Japan
00:27:36
Speaker
No. She used tubes.
00:27:41
Speaker
There's her in a Joshi wrestler fighting on top of some tubes. And that made me think, we need Tony Khan to get on this and she should join the BCC. She should be the first female member of the Blackpool combat club.
00:28:03
Speaker
Because you know, the BCC definitely could use a woman member and I can't really think of anyone on the current AEW roster that would actually, like, because to be the first woman in the BCC, you really gotta, like, you can't be like, oh, we'll give her a few weeks and see if it, like, it's gotta be like, oh yeah, that's perfect.
00:28:25
Speaker
I would say her or Masha, or like the two females that I think could immediately join and fight in a brutal style like them. Yeah, because you want kind of full brutality there. Not just submission, like I'm thinking like maybe you could fit Parazzo in there if you signed her. Yeah, you need real intensity.
00:28:53
Speaker
I mean, I guess the problem would be she does smile all the time. That would be, that would be the story. That would be the story. Daniel Bryan's like, stop smiling. Did you watch anything, Chris?
New Japan Match Recaps
00:29:16
Speaker
So I watched a little bit of New Japan this weekend, watched a couple of big matches from whatever the big show was called on Saturday. Ozzy Open defended the tag titles against TMDK, real good match. Took a little bit to get there, but very good match. Disappointing after the match, because the next challengers appear to be Evil and New Jiro, which sweet Lord, Ozzy Open's good, but come on.
00:29:49
Speaker
I don't, I think that that's like jerking the curtain at the parking lot of the BW threes. Like, and Ozzy opens great. I mean, who wants to see evil and you Giro. That's like, are they setting up a match for like, I don't know. I don't know. I don't know. I don't know. I don't know.
00:30:04
Speaker
Just some random Corakin show. I I don't know. I don't know. Very disappointing. And then what followed was I will say one of I don't know how exactly how it is in my list of matches of the year, but it's it's on the it's on the you know, the the short list, the top list.
00:30:22
Speaker
Tai Chi against Shingo Takagi in a best three out of five falls triad match. We had to win each fall by a different method. Terrific. They went like 40 something minutes. Wow. Maddie was a little bored by this. Towards the middle, she was like, can we watch cartoons? I'm like, after it's over. You're like, Tai Chi's on the TV. Didn't you listen to two weeks ago's episode? I love him.
00:30:53
Speaker
Don't you understand you're wearing the Aussie Open t-shirt and daddy's wearing the Tai Chi t-shirt, so.
00:30:59
Speaker
Um, but yeah, it was, uh, a great match. Uh, and I loved the Tai Chi clips, like his, his backstage after the match. He was like legitimately like, he's like, I'm totally spent. I'm just totally broken down. And they're like, are you going to try to take this, uh, in a different direction from Shingo, the king of pro wrestling? He's like, yeah.
00:31:23
Speaker
me the Shingo rule, someone's going to go to the hospital next. So we're going to do something a little bit, a little bit easier next time. More chill. I can't feel my hands right now, so we're going to go with something different. And just that brutal, that brutal honesty that only Tai Chi can bring. He thanked his friends. He didn't say he did the opposite of a reality show. He said he was there for friends. Yeah.
00:31:52
Speaker
He's like, you know, all like the only thing that I realized in doing this match was that like my friends were the ones that got me through. You know, I'm thankful. I'm thankful for friendship. Yeah. This is what wrestling should really be about. It's about the journey of friendship. The real king of pro wrestling is the friends you make along the way. And that's why Masada came in and brained Maga Butcher because him and Schlack are friends. Exactly. Yeah, exactly.
00:32:21
Speaker
Hopefully they never do a breakup angle like the elite, just five guys forever. You know, their friendship is to be, their friendship is too beautiful to be sullied by, by the drama of a breakup angle. I just hope, yeah, rather than a breakup angle, they just like many years from now, hopefully they just all retire at the same time together and then like move into a house together. And maybe then they have a reality show, but they, they keep the good vibes going.
00:32:48
Speaker
Which one of them do you think is going to fuck up enough financially that they have to come to the municipal auditorium in Nashville and risk their lives? Taka. It's definitely Taka. Yeah. Yeah. So that was a layup. He's kind of close to already there, right? Yeah. But see, the nice thing what's going to be fun about that is that at least one of the other guys from the group is going to come with him for moral support.
00:33:16
Speaker
They're not going to let Taka go alone. I'm pretty sure that the other guys are the only reason that Taka hasn't shown up to a show missing a finger. Like like Tai Chi has paid a lot of gambling debts for him. That's why he's the Ripaway pants because Tai Chi has to entertain these these bidders for Yakuza to pay Taka's gambling debt.
00:33:52
Speaker
Oh. You watch that match, Garrett, right? The what do you think of the the king of key of a match? I missed it. Oh, I thought you said you watched that. Oh, you watched the Kings Road one. I watched the Kings Road when I missed the other. I intended. I intended. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. No, I just misremembered. I'll catch that one when it's on because I guess that'll be an entire episode.
00:34:16
Speaker
of the thing. Yeah. Yeah. Because that sounds like that's the perfect like, which kind of also guarantees that it will make the cut because they always like things like there's certain match lengths that, you know, they're going to put on the American show. I'm forgetting what channel it's on right now, but it's like that's like one of the perfect ones. They love the one match that takes up a whole episode like exactly with commercials. And that sounds like it's right. Pretty much perfect length. Yeah.
00:34:46
Speaker
Do you guys think that Matt Justice is cool?
Concert Experience Comparisons
00:34:51
Speaker
No, that thought has not really ever crossed my mind. Yeah, same. You've never looked at his clothes and thought, that's a cool dude. I should dress like that man.
00:35:04
Speaker
or just like his whole visual aesthetic generally, no. No? Okay, well, I went last week to go see the Black Dahlia murder and terror. I hadn't been to a metal show in a while. And there were a couple different kinds of people at this show. There's the guy who's gonna wear the most obscure band shirt he can that's in a font that no one's ever gonna read.
00:35:30
Speaker
And then I would see really skinny guys who kinda seem like they're probably dorks, but undercover. If you dress like Matt Justice, but you're also a dork, I feel like you can still see the dork under there. Matt Justice, I believe it. So you don't ever see yourself wearing a belt made of bullets to a bowling alley metal show.
00:36:01
Speaker
No, I mean, I never really thought about it, but I definitely wouldn't do it because I thought it was cool. I might do it like because I'm a dork and I'm and I live my life openly where like I might be doing some like Punisher cosplay and I'm like.
00:36:22
Speaker
I feel like that would have been a thing like if Bullet Club had done that for a little bit. It's a belt of bullets. I feel like a bunch of us would have shown up to all in in bullet belts. Well, and I think we would have bought that shit at Hot Topic so fast. Oh, yeah. Actually, I can't. Now I can't believe they weren't selling those at Hot Topic.
00:36:40
Speaker
Well, and I think that that's why even like the original Bullet Club got over, right? It's because like the NWO, like we were like Scott Hall and Kevin Nash are legitimately cool. And then like when they started the Bullet Club, it was like Finn Balor is cool. Like he actually just seems like a cool person. Even still, even though he's not in AEW where we would love him to be like, and he's not in New Japan, like it's just like, man,
00:37:08
Speaker
He just seems legitimately cool. And then by the time they got to Kenny and the Bucks who we know are dorks, it's like they had enough cool cred. And then that's why the Bullet Club became everything for everyone, is because it's like they had some of that legit cool vibe. And then they had that, oh, they're just like us, they're dweebs too.
00:37:31
Speaker
Who in current pro wrestling is the coolest dude you can think of, that you look at and you're like, that's a happening guy. That guy is. Tyrus. By the way, has a blue check mark, I looked. He's been to way more smashing pumpkin concerts than the three of us combined. All of them are in the last three weeks.
00:38:01
Speaker
I bet I bet Punishment Martinez, he seems like he might be cool. Oh, yeah, I can see him. I think Roman Reigns is probably pretty fucking cool. He's a dad. He's just like a dad, though, like he's like a dad doing dad things. He's never home. He's never his wife thinks he she works on Smackdown every week. She like he's just out there ripping it up.
00:38:30
Speaker
Well, he thinks he's at the bad bunny pay per view. Exactly. Moxley Moxley is obviously very cool. I was going to say Mox. He feels he feels like a cool, cool again in the sense that like he doesn't really give a shit. And that's kind of always kind of a cool energy. You know, plus he likes a good leather jacket. Always cool.
00:38:54
Speaker
But what's he gonna do that's cool after he leaves the arena? Like, he's very limited in his hangout spots at this point. Well, and it didn't sound like he was the most fun even before he went to rehab, per se. Mighta... I guess cool and fun aren't necessarily the same thing. Yeah.
00:39:13
Speaker
But I'd like to combine them into one thing where it's just like, this is a happening guy. He's going to take me out to a place. Some shit's going to happen. And you know, I'm going to have stories for a lifetime. Oh, you know, on that metric, I think Joey Janela. Yeah, I was going to mention Janela. Yeah. Oh, my God. Like come with me. It's come with me. It's going to be fun tonight. You're like, all right, let's see where this goes.
Hogan's Hangout Antics
00:39:38
Speaker
So last week you brought up the thing with him at the Hogan restaurant, but neither of us had seen it at that point. Now that I've seen it,
00:39:52
Speaker
It's insane. Did you see it, Fax? I did, yeah. I didn't actually fully believe it was a real thing. I'm not going to lie. We were recording. It's like, well, I don't want to go too far off script here. But I was partially, when we finished recording, I was like, I don't think this is a real thing. I think this is elaborate ruse.
00:40:14
Speaker
Like, if anything, you might have undersold it a little bit. Like, it is fucking wacky. Like, he has the whole setup where he's walking down the street, talking about the return of Florida Man, which Florida Man is back because Joey Janela can't work. He got set on fire against, fucking- Oneida. Oneida, when he got hit with like a exploding barbed wire bat. Yeah, and it fucked up his arm, apparently.
00:40:40
Speaker
Like apparently pretty bad. He was on, I mean, he wasn't on like, Masada fire, but he was on a pretty good fire. Has anybody checked on Masada? By the way? No, no one loves him. It's okay. We do care about Joey though. So he brings back Florida man. He's saying, God bless the USA. The visual, can you imagine sitting on a stage facing a crowd of people and just eating a meal?
00:41:07
Speaker
That's humiliating to me. Like that's that is an actual reoccurring dream where they're like eat on a stage in front of people. Did I buy a sticker? Did I buy a sticker of Brian knobs face shoving a cheeseburger in his mouth? Yes, I did. Did you also get the hat? I did get the hat. It's going to be a bad boy summer. Oh, man, I got to get one of those. That was I I think Brian knobs will probably get.
00:41:34
Speaker
Glee, possibly sexual gratification out of people watching him eat. He's like, the gratification is Hulk Hogan's girlfriend who looks very much like Brooke. To a point that my wife is like, is that Hogan's daughter? I was like, no, that's the lady that has the pleasure of effing Terry.
00:42:00
Speaker
Well, how old is Brooke Hogan? I haven't thought the name Brooke Hogan. Okay. She's actually 34. I thought maybe she'd be even older than that. Cause it's been a long time since I, and I was like, could Hogan be dating someone younger than her?
00:42:19
Speaker
me. I mean entirely possible but the the moment of that that is so brilliant as Joey turns around is singing at Hulk Hogan who's like giving him fist bumps and like giving him nods like you're doing good brother. He eats one of his french fries off his plate.
00:42:37
Speaker
And that bothered Knobbs so much that you see Knobbs really giving him a look and then he stops somebody and talks to it. And then Hogan's kid, what's the kid, his son who? Nick. Nick didn't even allegedly murder somebody. He killed somebody with a car, right? Oh yeah, oh yeah. So he's like, this guy ate off your dad's plate, disrespectful to the man who feeds us all.
00:43:09
Speaker
Chicken tenders and french fries. Honestly, that might have been the best thing in wrestling this week is Janela singing that song. And just God Hogan just in the background eating chicken tenders and french fries. I just like that's fucking humiliating. I never was that big a fan of the Hogan knows best, right? That was the name of the show. Yeah, I never really got into that. I never really watched it. Not really my scene. I would love a modern reality show.
00:43:39
Speaker
of Hogan as like an absentee boss who's just kind of aloof, just kind of there. And just, but like, imagine that, imagine you work there. He's your boss. So not only do you have to deal with, there he is eating the fucking carbonara for the 17th night in a row, because he's too cheap to go anywhere else, even with all that Gawker money.
00:44:09
Speaker
But he's my boss. He can have me fired at a moment's notice. And so can this fucking weirdo. You're just a server in Florida. And he has no idea whether there's a- You don't know who Knobs is. Yeah, exactly. You're just like, I don't, this fucking mullet guy that's always in with the boss is like- All you know- He's fucking with me and slapping my ass. All you know is that this guy can have you ended. Your career at the bar.
00:44:35
Speaker
is over. If the console Yeri, Brian Knobs says so. I think you're pitching a pretty good sitcom here, Fax. It's like a cross between Party Down and Young Rock. See, I was going to say, if you're doing it reality show style, it's called Old Knobs.
00:45:01
Speaker
Since you're pitching a reality show, let's do Party Down meets Vanderpump Rules. No Lisa Vanderpump heads in this podcast, I guess? Jesus Christ. Sorry. Well, now I feel like a fool. Knobs? I bet we get knobs on this podcast. Well, I feel like we just got to go down to that restaurant.
00:45:29
Speaker
Nob's Puzui has no idea what a podcast is. So he would love having a microphone in his face. We just go down there and just be like, yeah. And he'll just be like, are you a reporter? Be like, sure, podcast journalists. Tell me. And I'd like to think that it's probably better than Lawler's Restaurant, too, because they're there doing quality control every night. Right. Exactly.
00:45:54
Speaker
It's not good, but I mean, it's probably, it's solid. It knobs a leap there, you know? And I would say Hogan either will spring for the rights to actually get some WWE highlights to put on his TVs or has enough pull with Vince that he is not worried about it and will show it. Cause that's one of the things about the Lawler place, you go there, it's just like, what wrestling can Lawler get the rights to for free to show on the TVs?
00:46:21
Speaker
Cause it's not necessarily the finest stuff you think of. Just old Memphis, but then also UWF from Herb Abrams. Right. But also like only in like 40 second chunks just in case. So no lawyer can identify exactly what show it is.
00:46:40
Speaker
I'm looking at the menu to this restaurant right now and I'm like hugely disappointed. It is basically an Applebee's menu, you know, there's, and nothing is themed. If I'm gonna eat at Hulk Hogan's restaurant, something's gonna be called like,
00:46:58
Speaker
Great chicken tenders, brother, or something like that. You know, nothing. And I mean, it's called Hogan's hangout, right? So it's not like, like if they just called it like Terry's grill and like, they were like, Oh, we're not gonna like people that go here. No, but like, we're not gonna, but it's called Hogan's
Critique of Hogan's Hangout
00:47:13
Speaker
hangout. I mean, come on. Yeah. Honestly, the American cheeseburger menu looks better. I do hope you can go there for brunch and get like an omelet. And then they'll arrange the bacon on it to look like Hogan's mustache.
00:47:30
Speaker
Um, I like, I like that they'll serve you oysters Rockefeller. Now that said the majority, it is very Apple Bezian, but that said, it is pretty much most things on the menu are things I would imagine Brian knaps would eat. And honestly, if I'm there, like nothing's offensive. I'm going to give it a try. It is the barest minimum.
00:47:54
Speaker
Salad like there's only three salads on a fairly big menu and none of them have any like None of it like the healthiest one is their Caesar Which is normally the like oh my wife is making me get a salad but like I'm eating out so fuck fuck that You get the Caesars. It's the decoy salad and that's the healthiest they have here
00:48:20
Speaker
Even there, they also have, they have mellow yellow on the menu. No shit. That's might be the only, that might be their signature dish. Where else in the country can you get a mellow yellow right now? You have to go to Hogan's down to Tampa. I'm so every single Monday they do this karaoke thing. It costs $25 to get in. Guava barbecue, by the way, Guava go barbecue wings. Those don't sound bad with the mellow yellow. Hmm.
00:48:51
Speaker
This specifies though, this is not a meet and greet photo opera signing, so like leave them alone. It's hosted every week by Nick.
00:49:02
Speaker
And you're not guaranteed Hogan. It says, so there's going to be a celebrity guest, but it says we can make no official claim as to who may be a celebrity or special guest. So to those who are disappointed when Knobbs shows up, that does count as a celebrity. It's always Knobbs, right? It's just he's always there. It's like they don't even know what's happening. And then some random tourist comes in and is like, who's the celebrity tonight? And they're like, oh, fuck, what night is it again?
00:49:31
Speaker
Oh, God. Where's somebody? Somebody kick knobs. He's asleep on the beach. So do you think that means that Joey had to go to multiple Mondays until Hulk Hogan was there? Because this now I think he knew this as our special guests have included Hulk Hogan, Dennis Rodman, Rick Flair and many more.
00:49:52
Speaker
I think Hogan's probably there most weeks, though, right? Like and I don't think it's because of the karaoke or because his son says so. I just again, I think he just loves his own big tortellini. And, you know, he's not. Hogan just strikes me as the guy he's not going to pay for food when he owns a restaurant. It's just I just don't see that happen. I'm surprised there's only two pasta dishes from a man who started a restaurant called Pasta Mania.
00:50:21
Speaker
But how well did that work out? He loves pasta, but he realizes he loves it more than everyone else. He had to pump the brakes on the pasta a little bit. And again, he's from Florida, right? Isn't he even from Florida? I think so. So he probably likes really bad pasta. I mean, this King of the Sea sounds disgusting.
00:50:46
Speaker
Fettuccine noodles, Alfredo sauce, blackened shrimp, blackened scallops, grouper fillet, sun-dried tomatoes, spinach, served with garlic bread in the side salad. It sounds like a disgusting mix. But again, this is a place where Brian Knobbs hangs out. So one of the side salad options is chocolate pudding.
00:51:10
Speaker
And what you don't understand as well is that blackened just means burnt. Like it is well done burnt to a fucking Chris brother. Are you sure? Are you sure? Cause I feel like knob, the only way, the only part knobs gets to order off of is the kids menu.
00:51:28
Speaker
It's the mac and cheese or the chicken tenders. Well, you know that Hogan tells the staff like knobs doesn't eat for free. If he's going to order a burger, he has to pay for it. But knobs never going to do that. So it's just like he always kind of waits and like just tries to like cries like a puppy or just like literally like like when the servers come back with like the half eaten piece of Maki, he just kind of like knobs does a lot of hanging out by the trash can where the busboy dumps everything.
00:51:59
Speaker
Oh man. This is another episode of The Fellas are on Yelp looking at wrestling related French fans. He has a 3 out of 5 on 113 reviews. Pretty good Google score. 3.5 on TripAdvisor. You guys just keep going. I'm going to see if I can find a good review here. I mean, if they're running $5 for a fountain mellow yellow, what do you think market price on Oysters Rockefeller is?
00:52:27
Speaker
$138. So there is somebody in the reviews implying that Hogan does show up on every Monday for karaoke night. Still, despite that, gave it two out of five stars. Well, because it's with knobs and like you don't want to look at knobs while you're eating. And knobs is always eating.
00:52:54
Speaker
Like that's the thing. Monday night is the only night he gets free food because then he can count as one of the celebrities. At some point, John Taffer is going to have to come to this place and be like, he's eating out all your goddamn money, you son of a bitch. Are you stupid? You got to kick his ass out. Brian Nobbs can't be here anymore. Also, why is there a horse at the bar?
00:53:19
Speaker
One of the reviews just says go to Hooters in all capitals The tans aren't as good at Hooters though, that's right
00:53:35
Speaker
Does it count as a tan if you've just been passed out on a beach for the last three months? Yes. Honestly, Hogan's restaurant might now be a bucket list. Where do I?
00:53:50
Speaker
Tampa. Yeah, it's clear, Clearwater, which is actually a really nice area. And my dad lives not far from there. So I actually we were going to visit recently, my wife and I, and we were literally I was like, oh, we'll see my dad for a couple of days and then we'll do like a weekend in Clearwater. I did not know that this place was there. I'm going to have to go. You guys are welcome. Are you inviting us? Is this now a work trip? Let's all go. We can expense it to the account.
00:54:19
Speaker
We are we are part owners of Zencaster, right? Yeah. I will say a friend of mine moved down there not too long ago and they were trying to convince me to come down and visit by pointing out that we could go to Hulk Hogan's restaurant. So what as long as it's a Monday. So one of the reviews, which is a five star review, says he somehow knew that Hogan was going to be there for breakfast one day and then gave the five stars but said Hollywood Hogan
00:54:48
Speaker
And I, he's trying to quote, he's very bad at typing, whoever wrote this. He said, you know, something about respect his privacy while eating. And then left, but it's like, your Hulk Hogan, the name of the place is Hogan's. And you're like, why, if you want privacy when you're eating breakfast, don't go to the place you named after yourself for being a famous person.
00:55:14
Speaker
Yeah, you'd think this he'd be greeting people like Rocky Balboa. I used to love going to Clyde Fraser's. Clyde Fraser's, and it's unfortunate he didn't survive the pandemic. I hope he comes back. It was great. Clyde Fraser would go to every single table, shake hands, take pictures with you, and he'd talk with you. It would be great.
00:55:37
Speaker
I went there for my birthday one year. I got a picture with Clyde. Yeah. And the food was fine. Like it was, it was kind of like high end steakhouse prices for like medium to low end steakhouse, but it was a better menu than, than Hogan's. Certainly. I don't think I've got a knock at Hogan's menu though. Cause you know, I'd share some poke tuna nachos with you. I'm not getting poke tuna at Hogan's. I'm sorry. Yeah, no way. I'm getting it's, it's going to be fried for me, brother.
00:56:07
Speaker
Yeah. Oysters Rockefeller. That's not going to work for me, brother. You're like, I'm not trusting anything raw that was in a kitchen with Brian knobs. Here's my question for you guys. So let's say we show up there on a Monday night when not if and knobs are there when when we do. What are we singing for Hogan? Hmm.
00:56:31
Speaker
Well, you guys have your karaoke team. So, I mean, don't you have like your preset go tos? Well, you got to do something special for Hogan. We would for her. Of course. Yeah. I mean, we would get it right. But. I mean, the first thing I go to is Eye of the Tiger. Sure. But I feel like that's maybe a little too obvious. A little too on the nose. Yeah.
00:56:55
Speaker
You don't want to sing anything either that would offend him. Like, you know, well, Joey Janelle kind of already did it perfectly. That's where it's like it's hard to not just try to repeat what he did. You can't sing any songs about. Cuck and your friend's wife, your friend's wife and, you know, answering the phone. We didn't Brooke Hogan release an album calls. Can we find a Brooke Hogan song and sing that? That could be nice. But doesn't he hate her?
00:57:25
Speaker
Isn't that why we all hate Hulk Hogan now? But doesn't that make it better? Oh, and by the way, she didn't release an album. She released several albums. What record label is she on? And is there vinyl pressed? This is important. Photana Storch Sobey is what's listed on her Wikipedia as her labels.
00:57:53
Speaker
Fontana. I'm typing something into Google I never thought I would search, which is Brooke Hogan discography. So that they are owned by Universal Music. So technically, she's on Universal. She, you know, she needs to get away from the label. She needs to do a pay what you want, like Radiohead did within Rainbows. This is a thousand dollars easy for the redemption here.
00:58:22
Speaker
Wait, this is so be entertainment. Is that that fucking T from the 90s with the little gecko on it? Yes. I mean, I enjoyed that back in the day. Here's my here's my suggestion. Assuming knobs is there, which again, I think we're pretty sure he is. I think you go with Janet Jackson's nasty, strong, strong, nasty boys don't mean a thing. You know, just you sing right at knobs and just see how we respond.
00:58:53
Speaker
The names miss knobs if you're nasty. Mm hmm. Yeah, because if we did sing a brick Hogan song, there's no way Hogan would recognize that it's a broken song. Oh, how great would it be if you just made that one up? Is that that's a good one? I do. Oh, if they have Macho Man, the be a man. That's yeah. So that's the other right. I would literally. OK, this is what we're doing.
00:59:19
Speaker
We're going to find out who the DJ is at this karaoke night. Right. Because, you know, and let's hope that it's not staff and that like, they just hire a guy that does like every night he does a different bar, right. And does carry, which is a very Florida thing, right? All these outdoor beach bars. We find him, we make him an offer. We'll talk offline about how much we're willing to pay for this, but I'm guessing it's going to have to probably be in the tens of thousands of dollars. We'll figure it out. We're going to figure this out. Zen casters paying for it.
00:59:49
Speaker
And we get him to be a man onto the karaoke machine. And the reason we have to pay him so much is because obviously he's never going to be welcomed back to the Pasta Mania 2. Did Hogan and Macho Man never make up? I can't imagine when they would have, right? Time heals all wounds, right? Right. What time? When do you think Macho Man died?
01:00:17
Speaker
Well, he obviously has no hard feelings now. Does Hulk Hogan carry negative feelings towards a deceased man? Yeah, because he fucked Stephanie and Hogan didn't. Allegedly. Yeah, allegedly. I can't seem to find karaoke versions of Be A Man, which is very disappointing. Okay, we know some people in the New York karaoke community. I think we can make that happen, right? And if not,
01:00:47
Speaker
Okay. Listeners in Spain, we don't ask a lot from you. We've asked you to tell us who you are. You haven't done that. And I'm now I'm asking for something simpler. You clearly have connections to the dark web. That's how you found us. We're not on Bing. We're only on dark Bing. So use your dog, use your dark web powers to get macho man's be a man onto every karaoke machine in the world.
01:01:17
Speaker
I don't think that's too much to ask. I'll be honest, when we started this episode, I didn't know this is where we were going to be 40 minutes later. So I didn't know macho was in TNA for a hot second. Very hot. But yeah, it was just a
Upcoming Wrestling Events
01:01:33
Speaker
hot second. I don't see any don't watch the matches. I don't see. And I don't see any. Oh, you know what? I have seen a macho in TNA match now that I think about. But I don't see any reference of him and Hogan even being in the same story. No, I think this is before Hogan was there.
01:01:47
Speaker
Would you be more nervous to sing in front of Suzuki or Hogan? It's Suzuki for sure. There's no way Hogan's going to hit me. Joey stole his French fry and he let it happen. Plus, I'm very confident I'm a better singer than Hogan. Whereas I think Suzuki's probably got tones. I think he's got bars.
01:02:09
Speaker
And by the way, according to Wikipedia, and I will check the citation, it's reference 130 on the Macho Man Wikipedia. It says, for years, Savage and Hulk Hogan were at odds. However, according to Hogan, Jimmy Hart and Savage's brother, Lanny, the two reconciled shortly before Savage's death. And that is citing an interview. Oh, that's not a real website.
01:02:39
Speaker
Okay. I'm not buying that. Holy shit. What? Sorry. This is actual wrestling related that just popped up on my phone that I think is kind of exciting. It's happening in Atlantic city. Uh, it's a new match that was just announced for cage of survival. Okay. By Kingo versus Ninja Mac.
01:03:04
Speaker
I didn't even know he was in the country. I think he's going back to the country for a little bit. They've let him out of Japan. That is that's the only match announced. That's enough. All right. I mean.
01:03:17
Speaker
That on paper should be pretty good. Sorry to interrupt the macho man talk. I wonder if that's going to be an outdoor LAX City show. I would think so, which those are just a ton of fun, right? So it's June. Well, it still says the showboat.
01:03:34
Speaker
Yeah, but the showboat has an outdoor area. That gravel pit that they bleed in on the side of the hotel. Exactly. But yeah, I mean, it's a Sunday, which makes me feel like, do they have a time? Well, they have tickets available. It says... Five o'clock. Yeah, five to eight. That sounds like an outdoor show to me. Those outdoor Atlantic City shows are just a lot of fun, regardless. And the fact that you get by Kingo against Ninja Mac,
01:04:03
Speaker
That like, I'm literally making sure I already have this on my calendar. I don't, but the day is free. It's getting added. I'm just disappointed. I keep, I keep Googling songs that I feel like would be appropriate to sing for Hulk Hogan, seeing if there are karaoke versions and they don't seem to be like, for example, the, um, the main theme song to the movie, no holds barred. Ooh.
01:04:32
Speaker
It's no holds by. Damn, so that week in facts, you get Cage of Survival on Sunday in Saturday's tournament tournament of survival. So it's a full blown deathmatch tournament, which right now is it looks like Joey and Sawyer wreck and all dudes from Japan. Ooh.
01:05:01
Speaker
Yeah, and Rina, I was just telling you guys off the air how like I'm only home like seven days in the month of May. So, you know, sorry, honey, I know I haven't been home for a month, but, you know, there's a bunch of Japanese guys wrestling death mashes and Vikingo in Atlantic City. So, I mean, she's welcome. Sounds like a nice weekend away. She's she understands. She's welcome to come. That's date night, right? Yeah.
01:05:28
Speaker
Well, you know, but the show is five to eight. You know what I mean? So she, she can take her time getting ready. You come back covered in glass and blood just ready for a date. So what is cage of survival? Is that, that's just a, like a hell in a cell with glass. I don't know. Cause it's cages. I don't remember one. They did. Um, I think it was Murdoch and Cologne last year. It was like sort of a big, I didn't, I don't think I saw the match, but.
01:05:55
Speaker
That was Cologne's like going away, like his final deathmatch, right? Because I remember he did kind of like a retirement from deathmatch last year. That might have been it. He did deathmatch war games after that. Maybe.
01:06:14
Speaker
Fuck, who was his last one against? I don't know. Who are you talking about? Cologne? Cologne. Because Cologne won that match. I'm reading right now. He won the ultra violent whatever match. Oh, he won that belt. Ultra violent. So he. So he lost that belt. It was him. It was him and John Wayne Murdoch was last year. Well, GCW coming to every city in America, but Nashville. So.
01:06:45
Speaker
They just don't love Nashville. I'm sorry. It's weird. I'm looking at the pictures. Yeah, it just looks like a cage with just a lot of glass and light dupes. That sounds fun. Yeah. I think I'm going to probably watch this show tonight as soon as we stop recording. I think I'm going to find this on Fight Plus and give this a spin. It looks like it was in the showboat, which
01:07:11
Speaker
Again, it seems like a lot of blood for something happening inside a casino, but hey, let's see. They've done plenty of bloody matches. That's true. That's true. The show does not give a flying fuck. Which are you going to go to Chattanooga for like an ICW show, Garrett? I should because heater wrestles wrestles at all those and they do. Maybe let Mitton stay at your house, you know.
CM Punk's Future in Wrestling
01:07:35
Speaker
I mean, he can stay here, but like, you know, he needs to put down like a toilet seat protector and stuff before he, I don't, you know, got to put the rubber sheets on the bed. Well, are they still doing a lot of impact shows there at all? I mean, you still got impact right now.
01:07:56
Speaker
No, just when, uh, just when Nashville wasn't very COVID safe, it was okay to do impact here. But as soon as the restrictions drop, they, they hit the road. They actually just spent some time in Chicago this weekend and see him punk appeared there. Not on the show, but he was behind the curtain watching. Really? He played a game of, he played a game of Uno with people backstage.
01:08:21
Speaker
Yeah, like people in line saw, see him punks making his rounds right now like he. So at this point, he's absolutely going to be at that London show, right? Yeah. Yeah, he's coming back in June, I think is it's either it's either that or he's like we've been talking about forever. Who's going to finally beat Tyrus, you know?
01:08:43
Speaker
Yeah, the only place we haven't seen seen him is a Smashing Pumpkins concert, which I'm pretty sure Smashing Pumpkins is a Chicago band, right? I mean, Billy Corgans, sure. Yeah. Yeah, they can talk cubbies and, you know, it does seem does seem curious that he's leaving town to go to these other shows, whereas Billy's right there. Yeah. The next it seems like they're returning to Chattanooga, by the way, in July 1st.
01:09:13
Speaker
OK, that's in 30th. Yeah. You know what? I should make it up far. Chattanooga is a couple hours. I want to say it's halfway between here and Atlanta. So like two, two and a half hours.
01:09:29
Speaker
I mean, I need some live wrestling. It's starting to hurt me that I'm not seeing things. I miss the traveling and the going to shows and seeing you guys and seeing other wrestle friends from around the country. It's starting to weigh on me. Stupid baby. I didn't mean that, Ozzy. I do see, by the way, that, when is it?
01:09:55
Speaker
May 20th, not that far away. So this is in Alabama, but I know this is in Huntsville where I'm going soon. So I know that that's only a two-hour drive. It's literally exactly a two-hour drive for the airport. I know you're not far from the airport. The 20th of May is Rocket City WrestleCon 6. And Dalton Castle and the boys are gonna be there. Just saying. And Chase Owens.
01:10:24
Speaker
Action Mike Jackson, who they list, by the way, is GCW's legendary Action Mike Jackson. And honestly, I, okay, so after watching the Action Mike Jackson match against Blake Christian, I finally agree with you guys.
Blake Christian's Heel Persona
01:10:42
Speaker
I don't think he's a very good heel.
01:10:45
Speaker
It is just like, it seems like that is who, when they need to get the heat on somebody, they throw, throw them in the ring with action. And Blake just, I mean, Ricky Shane Page was such a good deal and it's not fair. And then, you know, Cardona was the next big one. It's just not working. It's just not working. We need another big deal.
01:11:08
Speaker
Yeah, and you gotta be, and I feel like it's kind of a softball, right? When you look at the big baby pieces of GCW, you've got Masha, you've got Nick Gates. It doesn't seem like it would be that hard to be, like you got a lot of material to work with as a heel. Right. And they're really, it seems like they're trying with Charles Mason.
01:11:31
Speaker
but it seems like they're not quite, it's either not working or they're not ready to fully pull the trigger on him. So they're like still teasing us with Blake Christian who
01:11:42
Speaker
There's no, there's, he's not a very threatening man. I think like nothing. And I think you got to run the gimmick with, cause I think, I think Manson probably is the, is the, I think he's definitely the better choice. And I think that he's close to ready, but they, they just got to do some kind of soft character reboot, like do something like an eighties thing where like he gets hit by a football and now he's not a serial killer anymore. He's just a rich guy. And his name is different because that name is.
01:12:09
Speaker
Makes no sense if he's not a serial killer. And it's stupid even if he is. So they got to get even GCW. I know I said he'll never be able to have that name and gimmick and like WWE or AEW, but honestly, he'll never even make top of the card in GCW without without like a new name and a new little bit of tweaking. And I think he's a fine heel just as his like MJF clone, like just generic wrestling heel, rich, little bit racist, you know,
01:12:40
Speaker
If he wins the title, that's GCW's just incredible moment in his current character. Right. Whereas I think he is. Sure. I don't know what happens. I think he is a higher ceiling than just incredible. Theoretically. Strong praise. But I mean, the implication there being that I do not believe Blake Christian has a higher ceiling, but just incredible. Just let's back into that where that's coming from.
01:13:07
Speaker
That's what you call a backhanded dis. And I like Bleak Christian in the ring. I do.
01:13:19
Speaker
But, you know? Same. Like him and Zane locking up again, it wasn't a super long match, but it was fun and was a nice reminder of kind of where we started liking both of those guys. I see in the chat Chris dropped in a little picture here, a link for us, a present for all of our wives.
Hogan's Hangout Merchandise
01:13:42
Speaker
Oh, it's not a stock though. Oh, no. I mean, it's the Hogan's Hangout signature crop top.
01:13:50
Speaker
But that's the red. Oh, it actually, that's the red one. They might have a different color. Maybe there's five and medium. Yeah. XL got XL here. Oh, it's showing XL out of stock. It's literally just mediums. There's the black has nothing. You got to get them now. It's not a single size in stock in the black one. And also Garrett, that was not a gift for our wives. That's for us. Okay.
01:14:15
Speaker
Rock some Hogan crop tops. The three of us crop. Yeah. And with that, here's my other. That's probably what Brian knobs wears most Monday nights, right? Cause those are the only, that's why there's no more above a large is cause knobs started with the double Xcels and then he vomits on them, of course. And then they just keep it and they keep going. And now he's down to the mediums, which just barely get to every time.
01:14:42
Speaker
Unfortunately, every time the ambulance driver thinks that you're dead and they have to try and resuscitate you, they cut the goddamn thing off. Doesn't the ambulance driver realize there's 27 bucks a pop? There's just like a couple of blocks there. There's just on a street corner with these perfectly scissor cut down the middle, Hogan's hideaway shirts just caked in dry vomit.
01:15:09
Speaker
Drive vomit of the Hogan's Hideaway Oysters Rockefeller. Guys, I know he's my friend. I know he's always gonna tell you he can have anything he wants. Not when those are that high at market price, dudes. You gotta just give him anything, tell him it's Oysters Rockefeller. He's not gonna know the difference.
01:15:36
Speaker
And it's definitely like, he's like, okay, brother, listen, listen, whatever we, whatever the kitchen makes that we don't finish, you can have for free, but you don't get any free booze, brother. No free booze, Miller Lights only.
01:15:50
Speaker
And then Knobs clearly just like brings his own flask in. Like everything else is freaked. I mean, he hasn't made a dime in what, 20 years? Like he's definitely bringing like, he goes to Walmart and buys just a giant bottle, plastic bottle of cheap gin and just kind of sneaks it into the hideout. You know, the one thing we haven't noticed and taken note of, and I don't want to,
01:16:19
Speaker
Probably should be wrapping up here, not too short. I just wanna point this out. Nobs is a lady next to him. Do we think that's his actual, like a girlfriend? That is, oh, god damn it. She's probably the hostess of the restaurant.
01:16:39
Speaker
Oh yeah, I see what you're saying. Someone's job at the restaurant on Monday night is to sit next to knobs and make them feel not so sad. Or just one of Hogan's girlfriend's friends or something, right? Although that's probably what a lot of staff is.
01:16:57
Speaker
Can you imagine her talking to her? She's going to run out of friends. It's like a, like a vampires. Uh, what's the vampire or the vampire's little guy that runs around and gets them people. They're familiar. It's yeah, she's going to be like a vampire is familiar where she's going to run out of friends and be like,
01:17:16
Speaker
No, all of my friends are gone. I've put them all with knobs. This doesn't end well with, so she has to pick people that she's like, they're more acquaintances than they are friends, that she doesn't mind that she's never gonna see them again. Yeah, I mean, although, I don't know, maybe depending what the going rate in Clearwater, Florida for Oyster Rockefeller is, I mean, Brian.
01:17:40
Speaker
No, but imagine. Hey, baby, you like always imagine waking like you drink too much and waking up next to Brian knobs. Like that's got to be like, like, OK, like your friend, like, oh, yeah, Daffy, I don't I don't I don't know what Hogan's girlfriend's name is. But like, oh, like Vicki or whatever she called and she's like, you know, I have a guy he wants to meet. He's a little bit older, but like, you know, he'll be cool. He's one of Terry's friends. Like, oh, Hulk Hogan, you mean your boyfriend, Hulk Hogan?
01:18:09
Speaker
Yeah, Terry. OK, so he's like a wrestler. Is this a wrestler? They're like, oh, yeah, this is a wrestler. He's like six foot two. He's a wrestler. Blonde was very, very big in the 80s and 90s and stuff. And you're just like, oh, he's famous. He's famous. He was on TV. And you're kind of like, OK, like I'm not marrying the guy. Like, I'll get a couple of ways to Rockefeller with him. And then like.
01:18:38
Speaker
He spikes your drink. And then you wake up and it's just Brian knobs.
01:18:45
Speaker
just basically at the end of the night. I'm just thinking, you wake up, you just feel terrible. You have to throw up, you run to the bathroom, you throw up, and then as you're leaving the bathroom, you notice there's Brian Knobs and his tighty whiteys playing Nintendo 64 on your couch. You don't even know where the Nintendo 64 came from. You didn't have a Nintendo 64 before this. He just somehow manifested itself when Brian Knobs was there.
01:19:14
Speaker
That's there's no such thing as a free oysters Rockefeller, baby. That's the answer to a question someone's asking. It's the question is, why are you here? And the location is rehab.
01:19:31
Speaker
Just in Brian Knob's wake at the end of a night at Hogan's Hangout is a bunch of cropped t-shirts cut down the middle and just a pile of women that have gone to rehab the next morning. I mean, actually, according to his Wiki, Brian Knobbs is still happily married to Greg Valentine's sister.
01:19:56
Speaker
You thought Dwayne Johnson's finisher was the rock bottom. That is his... Oh, wait, I'm sorry. Greg the Hammer's sister-in-law. So him and Greg Valentine, imagine that Thanksgiving. Your two in-laws are Greg the Hammer Valentine and Brian Knobs. Save some turkey for the rest of us.
01:20:27
Speaker
We got to get out of here. We're done. We're done. We've spent 80 minutes talking about Hogan's Hangout, which I'm not tired of. And this could go another
Wrestle Road Trips Idea
01:20:42
Speaker
hour. Every time we do a podcast, there's another thing we got to add to the best places we got to go. We're going to have to just quit our jobs, take sabbaticals, and just road trip this out for like two months.
01:20:53
Speaker
I still think it would be a great thing for Discovery to hire us to do Wrestle Road Trips, a travel show about pro wrestling. Yeah, we could eat the food, watch the shows, you know, get the iced coffee shirts. It's basically like, I want to eat chicken tendies around the country. Only chicken tenders.
Conclusion and Listener Engagement
01:21:23
Speaker
All right, everybody, I think that's the end. That's the end, we're getting out of here. Thanks for listening. Rate, review, subscribe. Give us that five stars. You can, you know, mention, you don't have to mention that we always talk about Jimmy Lloyd and Hogan's Hangout. But give us a follow at Predetermined Podcasts on Instagram, at Gartet on Instagram, at Jimmybacks, at Chris Miggs. Anything else, guys? Keep reaching for the stars.
01:21:53
Speaker
and hit our goddamn music.