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Caitlyn Baltierra Mini Episode - Scandal
259 Plays7 months ago
This week on the Mothers of all Crimes we tackle a hot topic on social media- Caitlyn from Teen Mom was blocked by her biological child's adoptive parents. So naturally she posted this private family drama all over Insta for us to consume and discuss. We read the infamous posts, give our opinions on this tricky situation and talk about the possible pitfalls in a family impacted by adoption. This is clearly a scandal and not a crime! We felt it was an interesting topic and hope you all agree!
Listener discretion is advised.
May contain explicit language and unfounded accusations.
Like, follow and chat with us @ Mothers of All Crime on Instagram and Facebook. Email us @ mothersofallcrime@gmail.com
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Transcript
Introduction to Podcast
00:00:23
Speaker
Hello and welcome to the Mothers of All Crime. This is a podcast where we deep dive into mothers involved in infamous crimes and scandals. I'm Monica and this is Crystal.
TikTok Drama with Caitlin Baltiera
00:00:57
Speaker
So this week on The Mother of All Crime, we are doing something a little bit different. We're stepping outside of our regularly scheduled programming and we're going to be talking about some TikTok drama. That's been on other social media platforms as well. I think it started on Instagram about one of our favorite moms from reality TV, Caitlin Baltiera from 16 and pregnant and Teen Mom, Teen Mom OG, Teen Mom the next chapter, all the iterations. She's been on a mall. On a mall and I have watched them all. It's embarrassing, but I'm a day one kind of fan. And I
00:01:40
Speaker
have kind of grown up with Caitlin. And I feel like she was pretty irrelevant for a while. Nobody was watching the show. It was not picking up a lot of traction on social media. But recently the teen moms have been involved in some scandals. And one has been blowing up this week that I just felt like was worth talking
Future Series on Teen Mom
00:02:00
Speaker
about. And we can kind of do this as like a little dry run for our teen mom deep dive series that we're planning to do where we're going to talk about each of the moms individually right from the beginning and tell their whole backstory and all of the drama they've been involved in over the years, which I'm really excited to do. This isn't quite that episode yet, though, for Caitlin, but we just wanted to talk about what's going on right now because it felt very relevant to our podcast.
00:02:30
Speaker
Yes, so quick little tips.
Caitlin and Tyler's Family History
00:02:34
Speaker
Caitlin and her now husband, Tyler, like you said, were on 16 and pregnant. So they obviously had a baby and put up their baby for adoption. They had an open adoption and were in their daughter Nova's life for a long time. And, excuse me, Nova. Nova's the second one. The second one.
00:02:59
Speaker
Yes. Yeah. still They have a bunch of daughters now. I know. I just had the list. I was like, wait a minute. I mixed them all up. Nova, Veda, and Raya, and I may have pronounced this wrong and I apologize, are the three that they have had you did it since they got married and are still living in their house.
Blocked by Adoptive Parents
00:03:18
Speaker
But the baby they had on the show was placed for adoption.
00:03:23
Speaker
And I think yeah the two of them in comparison to a lot of other the team moms that have gone through the show and the series seem very low key, seem very, I don't want to say normal because when you look at them independently, they're not. But in the grand scheme of things of the show, they seem to have the least amount of issues and they seem to be the healthiest couples.
00:03:49
Speaker
and did the best at the time for their daughter. And there was open communication at first with the adoptive parents. And the current drama that has kind of opened is Caitlin posted on her Instagram that she is now blocked from all communication with the adoptive parents, which is Yes,
00:04:20
Speaker
drastic change from what they were used to.
Public vs Private Handling of Adoption Issues
00:04:23
Speaker
Not that they had contact with her every single day, ah but Brandon Teresa Davis, who are the adoptive parents, definitely, I think, have started distancing themselves a little. But before we get talking about it, I will i have screenshots of all of her Instagram posts. because I mean, this is the kind of news, the hard-hitting news that I care about. She kind of word-robedded.
00:04:52
Speaker
so on her story That's what Caitlin does. True. On her story, you had to click through each of them. She said, adoption is crazy. I'm blocked all because of me sending updates and pictures of her sisters. How is that fair for Carly and her siblings? It's sad for sure, but makes me sad for the kids.
00:05:14
Speaker
When you're a bio mom, you have no say, no control. i can do All I can do is show Carly in the future how much I tried and continue to do so. She can make the decisions herself to understand who shut out who with a sad emoji.
00:05:34
Speaker
Next page read, I gave them one of my biggest gifts ever, a child I grew and loved so deeply. I will not let them take my voice. I post so I hopefully Carly will see it and see I have always tried. To know I mean nothing to the APs, but just a womb to give a child hurts my heart.
00:06:00
Speaker
I'm a person with feelings. The children I'm parenting have feelings. Carly has feelings. A child being involved with extra people that only love and support them. How is that threatening? I'll never understand.
00:06:15
Speaker
At the end of the day, I think her parents feel scared and threatened because Carly would ask questions about why we don't get together more, why we can't just fly to her for the weekend, etc. I will always support Carly loving her parents. They love her and raised her. But the fact that they kept us distant and Carly's siblings different does not help Carly. Anyone would know that if they were adoptee-informed,
00:06:44
Speaker
I love how people say I'm putting them on blast when I literally just sharing my own feelings. I'm not calling them any hurtful names or anything. As bio parents, we are taught to just take what's given to us and that we would be quote, lucky quote. But if anything goes wrong, we need to shut up and be quiet. Okay, I'm done for today with a laughing emoji.
00:07:14
Speaker
o I have like really, really mixed feelings. I'm kind of struggling with how I feel about this. um I found a post that Tyler put on his Instagram story in May. It's just like a summary of it, but I feel like it it's also kind of relevant to this. So I could read it or we can talk about Caitlin's first, but it's just, it's Tyler's her husband and then he has they share a lot on social media in addition to having a tv show so i think that's my maybe my initial reaction is i feel like it's not appropriate for social media and i don't know if that's just shadowing all of all of my other reactions to it if that makes sense i think where i'm just like i feel like this is a family matter and it's not for social media
00:08:07
Speaker
I definitely agree. I think it's tough for her specifically to distinguish the difference because she has grown up on TV. She went on there as a teenager in high school and has never got off. So I don't think she really understands something should remain private.
00:08:31
Speaker
while you have the adoptive parents who were not on TV, had no intention on being TV, but happened to adopt a child off of that happened to be on the show. And I think they would have kept it private and Caitlin making it so public. I don't think she actually knows any better, but it's only causing more harm than good when she thinks it's going to help.
00:09:02
Speaker
Yeah, I mean, I get that she wants to make sure that Carly knows that they have not like forgotten about her and that they care and want to be involved. I think that's really beautiful, actually. And I think that because they're on this TV show, that in itself has created a lot of problems with the adoptive parents, Brandon and Teresa, because You're right. like When they adopted that baby, they didn't know that Teen Mom would still be on in 2024. Teen Mom wasn't even a show yet. It was just 16 and pregnant, and there'd never been anything like that before. so and not all I would have assumed it would have just been an hour. Yeah, and not all of them stay on too. like They just happened to be one of the couples that kept coming back.
Adoption Agreements and Expectations
00:09:51
Speaker
and Yeah.
00:09:53
Speaker
I see both sides of it because I agree with you like she doesn't want that but then she also posted screenshots of all these texts that she sent to Teresa and for a closed adoption that At the end of the day, these parents are being, I hate to say it, she's not wrong when she says the bio bioparent need to accept what is given because it's a closed adoption. At the end of the day, you chose to give up your child for adoption. Those adopted parents are their parents and technically with a closed adoption, they don't have to even give you access at all.
00:10:36
Speaker
They're doing it because yeah you guys were just young and trying to do the best thing for your daughter. And I think that was them just, they respect it and they're like, hey, you know what? That's really nice. But there are screenshots from July 28th, August 7th, August 10th, like August 20th. It's not just one or two, July 20th, July 10th, July 22nd. It's not like she would check in once a month. She's sending them every couple of days.
00:11:05
Speaker
which can be a bit overwhelmed. I don't even talk to my family every couple of days, wait let alone. and yeah It could be a lot. It's a lot. And I think what they agreed to in the very beginning when they were 16 was a semi open adoption. But everything is still at Brandon and Teresa's discretion.
00:11:31
Speaker
like it's not legally enforceable. It was just like a agreement. And I think the agreement was like that they were going to send pictures and letters and have a visit once a year. And I don't, I don't think that they need to do more than that. And I also don't think that that was once a year for the rest of her life necessarily. It's that's not usually how it goes. I don't think it's legally
Complex Feelings Around Adoption
00:11:55
Speaker
enforceable. And I do think
00:11:58
Speaker
I think it's very easy to to want to blame Brandon and Teresa for keeping Carly from Caitlin and Tyler. I feel like a lot of people online feel that way.
00:12:11
Speaker
But the other side of the people online are Brandon and Teresa are trying to protect their child because maybe she shouldn't be in the public eye. And I'm sure that Carly attracts attention from fans. I'm sure people have realized who she is. So a girl named Carly who looks exactly like all of Caitlin and Tyler's other kids who has parents named Brandon and Teresa who lives in the town.
00:12:37
Speaker
that people know that they live in, they're like in a small conservative community, people probably know who she is. I don't think it's been a positive thing for Carly that this has been on TV. I don't think it's been positive for Brandon and Teresa. Maybe it's been positive for Caitlin and Tyler definitely financially it has. Yeah, and I think also because they've been on the show.
00:13:01
Speaker
Carly has to be a plot point because all the other people are talking about their babies they had when they were 16. So it will be kind of weird if they never talked about Carly and obviously the adoption affects them all the time. I think it would affect you for your whole life but I don't know if they would talk about it in the same way if they weren't forced to talk about it on TV for their whole lives.
00:13:26
Speaker
Yes and no, I see. Yeah, because they're definitely the show is going to bring it up and push it, but she's making the decision to blast them on social media between TikTok and Instagram and all that. Yeah, that's how her in decision and i I do think it's hard though for Brandon Teresa, cause I think you're right. Like at the end of the day, their daughter is 15 at this point and some kids just don't want that kind of attention. And she very well could have, if she has a relationship with the type of parent relationship where she could go in and be like, well then this is just becoming a lot for me. I don't want to go. Here's how I'm feeling, but I don't want to tell them. I don't want to hurt their feelings.
00:14:17
Speaker
sometimes like a parent will become the bad guy to protect their child's actual feelings. So I wonder if you have a good point of like Cora Lee's like, listen, I need to distance this set from because it's just too much for me. And I don't want to be on TV. I don't want to do this. And Teresa is going, okay, I'll be the bad guy. I will block because she might want that for her and be like, listen, I want you to be involved with yeah your biological family.
00:14:48
Speaker
But if someone's going to take the heat of it, she's not going to call up Caitlin and be like, hey, your daughter's going to see you because that's terrible. And that could ruin the relationship she might have in the future because she's a 15 year old. They're moody. They're emotional. It might just be like a temporary thing.
00:15:07
Speaker
I do think blocking, though, seems a bit of an extreme reaction. to me it does like what if there was some sort of emergency like what if I don't I'm trying to think of an emergency they would what if one of Carly's little sisters god forbid something happened to them and they wanted to get in touch with her they couldn't I think that it's I don't think it's necessary to block her it's not like Caitlin is stalking her she's just being annoying and maybe it's on some level it's kind of hard for Teresa to look at all of these pictures and videos of these little girls that look exactly like her daughter
00:15:44
Speaker
And maybe it's kind of weird for her to have this constant interaction with Kate, especially if Carly's not very interested in her bio parents right now, which could very well, could very well be she's a kid. Maybe she'll never be interested in them. That's possible. Maybe she'll want to, maybe she'll want to have a relationship with them when she's an adult. But I think 15, your life is weird. It's hard. You're figuring yourself out. You're figuring out your life, what you want. So.
00:16:12
Speaker
There could be a lot of different things, but I just don't think, unless Caitlin is threatening you, I don't think you need a blocker. Yeah. And that's, and see, that's where like I have such a hard time with social media because we're only seeing one side of it. We're seeing screenshots of her 20, only the ones that she posted. There is at least 20 messages, block messages, pictures, and videos that Caitlin sent to Teresa between July 1st and September 8th with no response. And
00:16:48
Speaker
I'm not saying she's hiding anything, but she's definitely not like scrolling to the very last day. So you see everything. It's just kind of a screenshot here, a screenshot here, because you can distinctly see things that don't match up. So we don't know what those middle ones are. So the ones that she's posting are saying things like thinking of Carly, please let her know that we miss her and love her and her sisters miss her, ah blah, blah, blah, or We had a visit from Tyler's grandma. It was hot here. Hope you're having a great summer. Here's a bunch of pictures. like We only see Nova's first day picture, but we don't see any of the in the middles. So I'd be curious if the in the middles are, I don't understand why you're not answering me.
00:17:42
Speaker
I like blah, blah, blah, because something had to have triggered more to it with some of the comments that in that story post just feel very missing. I would love to read all the texts. Yeah, it feels very missing because there may be stuff left out. Also, we don't know if there's other forms of communication. Do they ever have phone calls or FaceTimes or things like that?
00:18:08
Speaker
um not sure, but we wouldn't have those. I also know that Brandon and Teresa have repeatedly asked Caitlin and Tyler not to talk about them on the show or on social media. Yeah, it's possible also that they just are sick of it because it constantly happens. And there's still episodes of like the new season of Teen Mom being aired, maybe they don't love everything that's happening on the show. I mean, to me, nothing's happened that I would be blocking Caitlin over if I was Teresa, but I also am not Teresa. And I think there have been a lot of struggles over the years and it's not a perfect relationship. yeah I just, I feel like they could all benefit from some like open communication where they actually talk about boundaries and what's appropriate.
00:18:57
Speaker
But it is a very complex complicated situation. Yeah. And honestly, it kind of triggers me to a ah Dr. Phil episode that I saw once where, again, a bio mom who put her daughter up for adoption, the family started going after the bio mom. And in this really circumstance, there wasn't any communication historically between the child and bio mom.
Family Dynamics and Public Perception
00:19:24
Speaker
but they started blasting the bio-mom on the internet. And Dr. Phil kind of put it pretty well where he was like, what in your right mind makes you think that going after the person who has legal custody their entire life would be beneficial to you?
00:19:47
Speaker
Like it's the best thing for the child is for you to have a good relationship with the legal parent. Cause at the end of the day, Caitlin can bitch and yell all she wants and say that she's just being nice and wants to be involved blah blahb blah and At the end of the day, she has no leg to stand on. She, she made this decision. Yes, she was young, but.
00:20:16
Speaker
They made the decision. They have to deal with it. I feel like they did make a decision. And I think that they got a lot of positive attention for that decision. I think that they got a lot of success as an indirect result of that decision. But I do think that it was not made in a vacuum and they both grew up in very turbulent, abusive,
00:20:41
Speaker
poor families, they didn't have any stability, there's a lot of substance abuse around them, a lot of violence and toxicity in their homes. I think that they didn't have any resources. And there is an argument to be made that some of these adoption agencies are predatory, and that the way that they look at birth mothers as incubators producing a product for people to buy, because I mean,
00:21:08
Speaker
white babies, a healthy white baby girl, as cute as Carly was. I mean, that's a, that's a hot commodity in the adoption world. I'm sure there was a lot of people that would have adopted Carly. And I don't know that Brandon and Teresa were necessarily the best match. I feel like maybe they were a mismatch. Maybe things were not that clear to Caitlin and Tyler, but they also, they were just so young. I don't know that they could grasp what their lives were going to look like when they were in their 30s. Like most of us couldn't. Sure. But they they also didn't know that they were going to like hit the lottery basically and that they were going to have more money than Brandon and Teresa probably do and have all the resources that they would need to take care of Carly. If they had kept her, they could have done it, but they didn't know that. Yeah. So I think that they have a lot of regrets, but you also can only make decisions with the cards you have at the time.
00:22:03
Speaker
Oh, absolutely. And i it's complex I give them a lot of credit because in their circumstance at the time, they made the badest decision for them. And frankly, like if I think that was a story point that was so different for a team mom, and that is the only reason that they are still brought back for the first couple of times and then became a fan favorite. And that's why they stayed on after that.
00:22:31
Speaker
I think that if they had kept the baby, their relationship as a, their families were a little toxic, but their relationship actually was pretty good, particularly compared to a lot of the other ones on the show. They weren't the most interesting couple. Their interesting thing was that they were the only ones going through adoption. And I think that's what kept them so relevant at that point.
00:23:00
Speaker
but Like you said, they don't know that it was going to stay. and and If it wasn't becoming famous and hitting that lottery, the lives their lives and Carly's would have been very, very different if decisions were made.
00:23:14
Speaker
so
00:23:17
Speaker
I don't know. I think it's a little selfish to look at it where because we're successful now and now that everything has worked out really well for us, that you should change your decisions to accommodate us. I think it's very selfish and she's not thinking about And she might be thinking about her current children in the house, but also if you're not explaining, things if you're explaining things in a certain way, of course it's going to make things more complicated and harder for your kids. Sure. But it is hard. It is a very, I mean, I think that adoption on both sides
00:24:01
Speaker
It can be a very beautiful, loving thing, but it also can be a source of a lot of pain. And I think that there's a concept called a primal wound in adoption when a baby is separated from its biological mother. But I think it can work for the biological parents as well, being separated from an infant. it There is this natural connection, and you can't just sever that. And especially because Caitlin and Tyler stayed together, which I don't know if they would have stayed together if they kept Carly. I don't know if they would have stayed together if the show had not become Keen Mom and they hadn't gotten all this praise for staying together and enduring all of the stuff that they have. Things may be completely different, but I think it's it's very hard probably for them to have biological children together and know that they have
Media Influence on Adoption
00:24:58
Speaker
Carly's three
00:25:00
Speaker
biological full siblings at home with them who probably ask about Carly because she's not a secret. And I think it's probably tricky territory for them with the kids asking, because they probably want to know if they're going to see her. And if Brandon and Teresa are just leaving them on red, they don't have answers. And not that a nine year old child should be calling the shots, but i I could see why they want Nova to be able to see Carly if she's asking for it.
00:25:29
Speaker
But oh yeah, absolutely. Yeah. I just want there to be like, I want to just mediate a new contract. Like I want to sit down with both couples, not with the kids there, none of the kids there. And I just want to lay it all out. What do we, what's the problem? What do we want? What could we compromise on? I feel like they could bang this out in like 20 minutes and they could just have a whole new way of communicating because I think it's a lot of unclear expectations that are not being met. Yeah, I kind of read it that Caitlin wants it approached as like a divorce and not an adoption.
00:26:13
Speaker
Yes, I read it like she wants to be more in a co-parenting relationship with them, maybe not all of the time, but i she wants that ability to have direct access with her all the time, which I completely understand where she's coming from.
00:26:30
Speaker
but i think in most circumstances, when you adopt, that's not what you're expecting. And I would be curious if the Davises ever even wanted a partially open adoption, or if they were kind of bullied into it because of the show. Well, I remember from the 16 and pregnant episode that they had wanted a closed adoption, and Caitlin and Tyler had wanted a semi open adoption, and they had compromised. But I don't know if that was
00:27:02
Speaker
because of the show, because of the agency, because of maybe they'd been waiting a really long time for a baby and were just willing to agree to whatever and didn't think it through. But I think a lot of times these agreements are not kept also. And I i do think that Brandon and Teresa kept the agreements that they had and it's just, we're now beyond that agreement. So there's nothing laid out. sure And Carly's much more autonomous. It's easy with a baby.
00:27:31
Speaker
to like schedule visits, to send pictures, to do whatever. like Because she doesn't have an opinion. But this is a full person now. She's almost as old as Caitlin and Tyler were when she was born. yeah And she has her own life. So and again it's a sticky situation. I don't agree with the blocking without addressing the situation, for sure. I think it needs to be addressed. But I do think Carly just wants more involvement than she was A, ever promised, B, the Davises ever intend for her to have. And I think she's having a hard time grasping that. Because again, she made that decision. As a teenager, when your brain doesn't fully develop, you have all these hormones all over the place, you were in a tough situation with before the show. I think that she's trying to
00:28:28
Speaker
not have to deal with the consequences of those decisions and hoping the fact that that she does have a lot of pull on social media and she's still part of the show and she does have the funds that it, she can kind of bully them into getting what she wants. Just like you said, like they didn't want the open adoption. They wanted it closed, but kind of got negotiated into something else. I'm wondering if she thinks that because of her situation, she can negotiate getting what she wants again.
00:29:05
Speaker
Right. But yeah, I have a lot of, I don't know. I feel like I have a lot of empathy. for them. But I may also have I don't know if it's really fair. I don't i don't really know if we just don't have enough information about what Carly's actual life is like. We don't know if maybe she's struggling in some sort of area of her life. Maybe she's struggling with the adoption. Maybe she's struggling with the fame. Maybe she's struggling with her own mental things, physical things, school things, we just don't know. And it's good that i'd rather it's good that we don't know. Yeah. But i I think that there's a form of like, this like privatized
00:29:53
Speaker
infant adoption, I have a lot of complex feelings about regardless. And I do feel like it can be very predatory. And that sometimes birth mothers are promising and adoptive parents are promise things that are just not realistic, or they have a natural like hope for more. And I think that it would be very hard to predict how you're going to feel about a situation 15 years into the future. So I have a lot of empathy for everybody involved. And I think that really, of course, the most important thing is Carly's privacy and safety. And I don't think that these messages on social media are good for Carly. I think that they should try to backpedal and not talk about her online and not talk about her on the show. But I know that they'll also get a lot of hate for that. So they're kind of in a tough
00:30:50
Speaker
situation like they have to talk about her as part of their show. And then I think because it's on the show, it also affects their social media. And that's what a lot of their comments and engagement is about. Yeah.
00:31:04
Speaker
So we're in an in-cripple situation. I agree. I think it it's difficult for the situation overall.
Critique on Caitlin's Decisions
00:31:12
Speaker
But I feel like Caitlin's just being reactive and in a form of hurt, either from deception or just regret or just the drasticness of it. Because I could i do agree. like I don't think that she should have been blocked without a conversation, for sure.
00:31:33
Speaker
But I also feel really badly for the other side of Carly and her parents, because at the end of the day, they're just trying to live their lives. And Carly, we have no idea what she's doing, but nor should we. She's not on the show. Her parents aren't on the show. Her biological parents are. Absolutely. But it's one of those, it's a tough situation because I just, I feel like Carly is but very much considering what's best for her and her household. And I don't think, quote, her family is entirely being considerate of Carly. I think she looks at it, again, two separate families where Carly is this separate entity than her household. And she wants more of a co-dependent, like co-relationship.
00:32:34
Speaker
And she's thinking about her kids at home being, well, where's Carly? Or her conversations that she had in the past with Carly about why they don't see each other or whatever. I don't know. i don't I think she's thinking more about herself than she is about maybe Carly in that circumstance, putting it on blast.
00:32:54
Speaker
like There's other ways to read, message them on Facebook. Direct message on Instagram. fine like Show up at their house and be like, I'm so sorry, what did I do? like You have the financial means to go. It's not like they can't do it. i i just I feel like there was better ways
Conclusion and Future Exploration
00:33:14
Speaker
to address this. And i I really don't like the fact that she posted all of these text message screenshots.
00:33:22
Speaker
I think are the ones that bugged me the most. Like I get the word vomiting with the way she grew up and also with the show kind of probably pushing it, but these text messages are just unnecessary. Like either post every single thing you posted with everything. Don't be selective. Like that just rubs me the wrong way.
00:33:47
Speaker
I would agree with that. I would agree with that. I think they're in a hell of their own making, as many people we talk about on the show are. True. And i i think there's I think that we've covered this recent thing that's been very viral right now pretty well. But I do think that there's a lot more to talk about with Caitlyn. And this is getting me very excited to do a Teen Mom Deep Dive series. Yes. But can we have any final thoughts on today? Yeah. I was just yeah i think you're right. where During our deep dive, a lot more of her behavior is going to come. I'm not going to say it's justified. It's going to be more understood. Maybe it's the way that I want to word it. yeah I definitely also want to see if I can find the adoption agreement and read it, because I think that there are screenshots online of it. And I think that maybe would help me understand what they I know there was a point on the show where they were reading it. So maybe I can find that. Hmm. Well, we'll find out on our episode.
00:34:46
Speaker
Yeah, stay